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jasonsknight3 · 2 days

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I was asked by @eva-sparda20 what my thoughts were on Arkham verse Jason and his parents. Here’s the story and the rant. I think most Jason variants have the same story for the most part. I also know in the original story his mother wasn’t actually Cathrine but was Sheila, I honestly don’t roll with that sorry line. I like the newer version where his mother is Cathrine. Besides, the original had been somewhat rewritten and is different from the original. That’s all! Enjoy, and just know there are dark themes. Sad ones. Be prepared.

⚠️Warning!⚠️ mention of drugs, abuse, sexual acts, and death.

AKJ’s father and mother are no different than the other Jason Todd variants. A selfish mother, deadbeat dad who may or may not have tried to make ends meet but was too drunk or drugged out like his wife Cathrine. AK Jason’s dad who is Willis Todd was abusive, abused his wife, abused Jason without discrimination. At some point in Jason’s life his dad started sleeping elsewhere. Going to the next best thing. Wherever he felt like going. Keeping the bed warm for another woman. Before that Jason’s dad did try to take care of Cathrine the best he could. However it’s hard to have a drunk man try to take care of a drugged out woman. He grew tired of trying, frustrated, he wasn’t in love with this woman anymore, it was a pain, an inconvenience. The abuse started shortly after giving up when Jason was around 3 almost four. Willis left when Jason was 6.

As for Jason’s mother, she was barely conscious. She was a good girl who got caught and fell in love with the wrong crowd. Once she got caught up with Jason’s dad and it was all downhill from there. Once addicted to drugs she couldn’t quit. No one stopped her, there was no voice of reason, she probably would have been outcast from her upstanding family. During the beginning of Cathrine and Willis’ relationship Cathrine got pregnant. She was mindful enough to not do any drugs during this time. At least not a lot of drugs. It’s still a miracle that Jason was born with any sort of disability mentally or physically.

During the first few months she took care of infant Jason, breastfeeding, sang him to sleep, all of the things. She was clean for a little bit but when Jason was about 2 she gave in to the itch that had always been in the back of her mind. The need that she felt ever since she stopped. Willis was more than happy to provide too so that didn’t help in the slightest. That’s when the cycle started to a point where it would never stop, wake up, shoot or snort a drug, and drift. The abuse she insured didn't really matter to her, she didn't feel it anyway. When she would “wake up” from the high she would see the bruises, the swollen parts and a beat up Jason. She couldn’t handle the failure. That fact that her parents were right. She’d become nothing. A failure. What’s better to do to forget them to do more drugs? Worked so far.

Jason started taking care of his mom when he was almost 4. When she was somewhat conscious he gave her water or beer, whatever was accessible. He learned to never let her have milk when drugged out. That was…a traumatic experience in itself. A bad mix. There was hardly any food in the house, just some crackers and some food that was in the freezer for a long time. He saw his mom use the microwave once so he knew what to do. He’d cook frozen food the best he could. Sometimes Cathrine would complain that the food was still cold through groans and have formed sentences. When his mother was completely passed out though he’d try to give her water, most of it didn’t really make it far, just pooled in her mouth and slipped down the sides of her lips. A miracle she didn’t choke.

When his father was around he was on high alert. The fights, when his mom was somewhat awake and alive having animated arguments and fights with Willis. Jason would hide under the table just waiting for it to be over. If Cathrine was passed out the narrative changes. His mother is defenseless. Vulnerable. So he stepped in protecting her the best he could. Most of the time it just ended with him flat out on the floor next to his mother hurting and sobbing. Sometimes as far as bleeding.when Jason’s dad started not coming home anymore he took care of his mom full time. Feeding her, sometimes helping her bath and wash up. That mostly included just a cold wet cloth and scrubbing. She still smelled most of the time.

The times she was awake she’d leave, usually to get her fix. Most of the time she came home with stringers. Jason witnessed all sorts of disgustingly sexual acts. Heard the most obscene words. Name calling, hair pulling, licking, fevered kisses, naked skin, and sounds that kept him up at night. Things a little boy who is only 6 shouldn’t see or be exposed to. Eventually he came to understand that those visitors were being paid with her body for drugs. He started stealing and dumpster diving for himself and his mom. Jason was light on his feet and hadn’t been caught by the cops. Not at all. He’d been jumped before though for food by some other street dweller. That was an awful time. He practically crawled his way home.

By the age of 8 Jason’s mom stop rousing so much, she stopped mindless babbling about things Jason didn’t understand and one day…she stopped moving all together. Her lips and fingers are blue from the lack of blood flow. Slight built up frothing at the mouth. A scary sight for Jason. He’d clean away the froth and try to warm her up. He tried to give her water but that wasn’t going to wake her. Not this time. No amount of pinching, shoving, or patting woke her up. He even punched her as hard as he could but she didn’t wake. He bawled because he felt guilt for hitting her hard. Reminded him of his dad. He’d apologize to her crying. “ ‘m sorry, I-i didn't mean ta hit ya hard.” The next few days he tried to wake her up but nothing. She was gone. Sadly there was no time to process, he had to fend for himself now, to try and survive. Part of him hoped she’d just wake up. He checks from time to time every time Jason comes back home. He stole, bargained, and ran the street. Smarter than any kid his age without an education.

One night he saw something, a sleek looking car that had a bat on it. A symbol. He had heard of Batman, but had never seen him though. Pretty stupid of him to leave such a nice car unattended. He would look around and when he saw the cost was clear he’d take a heavy four way wrench and start to work on stealing one of the tire plates. A shadow casted a darkness over him. Someone looming over him. Gripping the tool in his little hands he whipped around to swing at the individual only for it to be ripped from his hands. Batman was terrifying but Jason wouldn’t let him know he was afraid. A slew of colorful curse words and creative threats spewed from his mouth. Threats he knew he couldn’t really keep but he wanted to get this Batman to understand he wanted a pushover or easy to take down. The Batman analyzed him, looking him over quietly for a moment before the odd sound of laughing. Jason should have ran but he didn’t. He stayed. He was confused. Batman smiled and said “hungry?” Jason would causouly accept. That night he’d eat more burgers than he’d ever had in his whole life. Fries and a drink. He ate like the starved child he was. That was where his life started as Robin. The snowball that brought him to who he is now. The Redhood. The vigilante of the streets. The man who used to be the Arkham knight. The man who is playing Batman’s game but with his own rules.

Side notes: Jason’s life never really had a pause. He still kept on going in life and didn’t get a chance to heal or even pause and think things over. His own feeling came out when fighting criminals. Batman’s mistake was not giving Jason time and therapy before throwing him in the world of Robin. He didn’t get to think about the loss of his mother or father. His mind was so focused and overworked on education (which he excelled in) being Robin, detective work, being Bruce’s son, he never got time to pause and heal.

Jason’s mother was found by the neighbors of the apartment they lived in after she started stinking. An unfortunate end.

Arkhamverse redhood does sometimes think about his parents. Sure it’s sad but he can’t necessarily find it in himself to feel sad. There wasn’t a connection there and there was an emptiness there. He also has so much more trauma on top of his parents. The joker, Batman, all the other things.

Currently he’s trying to heal. He’s had some time nowadays to settle. He’s had a few mental breakdowns. He’s so out of sorts. Full on crying, heaving breaths, all of it. Over everything, there is so much pain there isn’t a distinction. He’s trying to go to therapy and figure it all out but it’s hard. Therapy is great but no amount of therapy could change his mistrust, jumpy moments, nightmares, and PTSD. Sure it could suppress them but they always come back. Especially with his kind of trauma.

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camgoloud · 11 days

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you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons

#‘out of nowhere’ she says like she hasn’t been doing a lot of reading/thinking recently about various tragic messy breakups #and the later regrets of the parties involved #anyway. tell me not to text her #it’s been over two years since the last time we talked… absolutely no reason to break that streak now. lord give me strength #she was really fucking mean to me! like objectively intentionally unwarrantedly cruel! it ruined an entire year of my life #and fundamentally changed me as a person on a deep level! there’s a lot of things i used to like about myself that i don’t think i’m ever #going to get back #and yet every once in a while we have to do the whole ‘maybe i could make things right’ song and dance 😔#the thing is most of the time i’m not even really angry with her anymore like enough time has passed since all the shit went down that #really i just sort of look at her behavior and feel sad. both because of the impact on me but also because of the ‘that’s really how you #felt you needed to act towards someone who cared about you? you couldn’t have just expressed your feelings in an honest and productive way #instead of just lashing out in the cruelest possible way and ruining the entire relationship beyond hope of repair?’#and i feel bad and sorry that it went that way and honestly i kind of pity her and hope she’s gotten some of her shit worked out #so i’m not like. actively pissed off at her anymore. but also i can’t think about her without thinking about the worst year of my life so 🙃#i don’t actually feel that trying to reopen that door would be very healthy for me at least #we did try a Reconciliation of sorts a couple of months after the initial falling-out and while it was kind of helpful for me in that she #like. apologized lmao. and affirmed that i wasn’t crazy and she did in fact On Purpose say the most hurtful things she possibly could have #said to me given the information she had at her disposal. and that i really had not done anything to her that could warrant that. etc.#it also left a sour enough taste in my mouth that i just don’t see a future where the two of us spending time together is enjoyable for me #and yet… the regret will always live inside me i think. maybe if i were a stronger person…#caseyposting

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cakeboxie · 2 months

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I keep seeing ppl make web weaves so I figured I’d try to make one for Charlie except I don’t have any good screenshots of him to include lmao (I kinda went on a really depressing ramble in the tags btw so uh, keep that in mind if you read them)

#Charlie [tav]#web weaving #we’re all going to ignore how hard I’ve been projecting my loneliness onto Charlie lately #bc god damn if I haven’t been yearning lately #I miss when [uninteligable noise]#it’s the yearning for something I have already #but I also don’t #bc ✨trauma✨#in the sense that I want to love someone #in the raw human way where nothing else exists #except for you n them #but I can’t form meaningful relationships anymore #not truly #there are a few people I care about #and plenty I tolerate enough to interact with #but I don’t know what love feels like #and I want to #I want to know so bad #I think that contributes a lot to my perception of myself as inhuman #not subhuman #just #not a human #I usually pour this into my art #that’s how I get things like my current header #the hellgrove piece with them in the kitchen #bc I want someone to hold me and love me like that #but I don’t #I think I’d explode if someone touched me #but I also need to be touched and savoured and loved #I’m glad at least that my yearning hasn’t made me bitter

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seilon · 11 months

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kinda wild how you can have almost every aspect of your life deeply intertwined with someone else for years and then have all of that thrown in your face when that person decides none of it meant anything and, in fact, was toxic and purge-worthy

#hahahaha it’s been a bad day #and I am spiraling and all around not having a good time #I keep looking at the bulletin board in my room that used to make me so happy to look at because of all the good memories on it and the #reminder of there being people who care about me and now it just sorta. does the opposite #most of it just makes me feel. dread.#he’s in almost every picture and 80% of the people in the pictures in general I don’t talk to anymore for one reason or another #mostly people who just drifted away because I’m absolutely terrible at staying in touch with people #like not in a quirky way. like actually actively ruins relationships for no reason level bas #but some of them are people who purposefully don’t talk to me anymore #found out recently about one of these people. it’s someone I’d been friends with for like 15 years. purposefully blocked me #I believe because of whatever bullshit my ex has told her. she never asked me about anything so whatever she knows is #heavily biased and probably warped #because I don’t have anyone advocating for me. lol #even my close friends- the extremely few I have- are ‘neutral’ on it. which. im gonna be honest hurts me quite a bit. I have no one who #truly condemns him for the way he’s handled (lack thereof) all this and bolstered all my trust issues in the process and has made me #constantly critical of my own intentions because I can never trust that what I do or say is manipulative or ‘unhealthy’ anymore and I don’t #think I’m an all around good person on top of that because of my low empathy and all that and etc etc etc. it’s really fucked me up #but yeah anyway. yeah. they’re still on good terms with him more or less (though not as close as I am but that’s partly just due to me being #physically close rather than in another city). and it honestly hurts me that they could actively be centrists here #like I. just. really don’t trust anyone anymore. how the fuck could I #uh. anyway. im not sure if i want to take the board down all together or just take off almost all the photos on it #not sure what’s more depressing #cause they’re both pretty bad lol. almost all my major good memories from the past five years have included my ex so they’re basically all #tainted and unpleasant to look back on now. really just wasted five years of my life for this #another reason I’m constantly contemplating my own intentions these days is because I have a lot of thoughts and urges that I’d never do but #that are. related to purposefully hurting others or myself physically or emotionally or both. like. every part of me wants to deck my ex in #the face but obviously I’d never do that. but even just the compulsion feels like a justification of his narrative/view of me as a person #like haha maybe I am a shitty toxic abusive manipulative bastard. maybe I do just deserve to be alone where I can’t hurt or think about #hurting anyone. it’d definitely be better all-around if I didn’t fucking exist. burden lifted. but you know.#not sure how im like this but also egotistical and self centered but alas here we are. anyway I’ll delete this soon sorry

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nightly-ruse · 1 year

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I think I may be a little odd

#I’ve been thinking about like everything/neg/pos/breakdown inducing #and I think I’m mentally I’ll #like yeah no shit but also it’s very clear #I literally got out of breath the other day talking about wolves and Yellowstone bc I was talking so fast about them #also have very wild mood swings paired with abandonment issues constant shame for ppl caring about me and trauam over friendships bc #so many have gone wrong and I’ve been forever changed or abandoned (both in one case)#I mean I met this girl at a school meet and she just reminded me of a person who hurt me. they had the same same mannerisms looked similar #besides the hair and I had a full panic attack. I feel bad about that she probably was really nice #or how I feel sick just thinking about the local park bc it’s where I was forced to hang out with a ex friend that wrecked me #such a mixing bowl of bad traits #I can focus I can’t remember I’m either too lazy or too hyper to stay still I can’t regulate tone well and scare myself constantly just by #talking. relationships always end in a burning bridge even when they were so good bc I get so paranoid and scared they’ll leave that I leave #myself. jumping to crazy conclusions to the point I start hallucinating due to stress #I mean how do I even explain to my therapist that my only good friends ended with me skipping school the last days bc I thought one died.#she actually just left school early.#that one I kinda get even tho it’s fucking nuts bc tjat year has mentally burned me so goddamn much but still #and even tho I’ve kinda had a constant itch that something completely explains why I’m this way but am too scared to bring it up bc of #change and trauma related to bringing up my own mental health #I don’t even know what thsi is anymore sorry #should just shut up and sleep #I’ll be fine by morning anyways so what does it even fucking matter #ruse rambles #vent tag

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thesunbrokeyourskull · 2 years

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#I would kill my ex ‘p’ to become rich.#I would kill my ex ‘m’ to obtain even more beauty and attract even more people.#I would beat up my ex ‘b’ to the point of him almost dying to have a nice house and the best of the best of things.#I would beat up my bf ‘d’ to be more mentally stable so that I am balanced and at peace with myself and my life.#I would kill my ex ‘k’ to become a well known scholar who has many degrees in maths science and philosophy and to preform surgery&research #I would step on anybody to get to where I want to be in life if it meant making myself happy.#I just manipulated my bf into feeling bad for me because I genuinely just want to feel good and secure even if that’s at his expense.#he’s right.. I don’t care about anyone more than myself and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. why should I put someone above myself?#I’ll tell you what.. until someone can show me that being a good honest generous person can get me anywhere I’ll keep doing what works :)#grey god #puppets #and I genuinely just don’t like or care for others. there’s always something I want in return when it comes to relationships with others.#I find humans disgusting and faulty and I don’t care if I add to their pain because it’s usually to benefit me and if it doesn’t it’s to-#-get back at others for hurting me. or I’m bored. I probably have the most sick and twisted mind of anyone I know. I think people know that #-tho but they still keep me around and help me out whenever I need it. it’s all a show for me and for them. people are so stupid and they #-genuinely think doing the right think helps them. it doesn’t. it’s kind of sad. I just know that once ‘d’ realizes I’ve taken him for -#-everything he’s got it’ll be too late and he’ll have to deal with how much better I am than him and how much I’ve grown leeching off of-#-his emotional labor. I just jump from one person to another taking what I want and what I can. I don’t think I’ve genuinely loved anyone.#I’ve always been this way. I almost love people but then I just truly don’t. it’s more fun to see how far I can break them before #-they can’t do it anymore. I hope that everyone I’ve ever hurt continues to hurt forever and that they never grown or evolve.#’d’ told me tonight that I ruined his life. ‘b’ told me I ruined him. ‘m’ is a coward and he said he’ll never love again.#’k’ is a used up simple minded loser. ‘p’ is a stunted delusion addict with me issues for the rest of his life. notice I said me issues and #not daddy or mommy issues lol. I have tricked them all. they are all pathetic and whimpy fucks.#the day I grinded against ‘d’s sluty ass again after I ‘raped him’ he told me to go slow but it made me think.. what if I just raped him?#I could just do it and he won’t do shit about it. he’ll forgive me like always. he’s an insecure loser. I wanted to just take my dick-#and shove it down his throat and then ruin his hole with it #but I didn’t. I respected what he said but the fact that I thought about it isn’t good.

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pastel-armadillo · 2 years

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Genuinely feel like I have no where to vent to cause my vent account locked me out and this is the only social media site that no one follows me on so I’m just gonna use the tags

#I genuinely feel like I’m shutting down and I have no idea what to do #anyone fights me on anything I just give up #I’m so tired of fighting and I just don’t care anymore #I’ve cared so long about everything #I’ve tried #so hard for everyone for so long #and I just don’t have it in me anymore #and I feel so guilty because I know it’s ruining my relationships #especially when the sweetest girl ever was trying to date me and I just.#kept shutting down #or when gigi is trying to get back to as close as we were #I see them trying so hard for me #and I don’t have the fight in me anymore to try back #and I’m just so sorry #I wish I was better and I wish I was the person they deserve #but I’m just not #I don’t even have it in me when my ex is shitty to me anymore #I just agree with whatever he wants and let myself be the bad guy #because I just don’t care #and it never helps on days when I see my family #and I remember how alone I really am #I’m happy living alone and everything #I can just come home and relax with the cats and I’m safe here #everything is safe here nothing can hurt me here #I love coming home and having a nap on the couch #I talk to the cats like they’re little people who understand and boots I think does at this point #but sometimes it gets to me how much I’ve isolated myself and how much I’ve shut down #things will get better they have to get better but the only way out is through I guess #idk everything is hard right now #delete later

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eyesopentv · 4 months

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thinking about how i was only in the hospital for a week bc i hated the staff so much i forgot to hate myself

#miles thots #tw suicide #actually what happened was i told the story of my coming out and expressed my anger at my mom for taking so long to be okay with my transne #in a group session and the nurse was so quick to defend my mom even saying she sounded like a good mom even after i told her it was the #biggest reason i wanted to die #and she was all ‘i’m sure she just didn’t understand’ even though i said i’d sent her videos and links to articles and offered to explain #myself if she still didn’t get it #this nurse made me feel so incredibly invalidated. i left group early and my roommate came to check on me (he’s also trans so he got it)#i was actually still actively suicidal when they released me but i hid it so well bc i couldn’t stand to be in there any longer #my friends saved me more than that place did. they let me crash on their couches until i was ready to talk to my mom #also- in case anyone actually read this: my mom is wonderful and i love her and we have a very strong relationship now.#it took a lot of work to get here though and it doesn’t change how i view what she did or how she made me feel in the past #but we have talked about all of it and i’ve forgiven her. she’s now my biggest supporter and i love her to the ends of the earth #so this story isn’t me talking bad ab my mom- just the situation and the response i received #oh yeah also they violated hippa and i didn’t realize it for about a year and while they had no right-#i also don’t care enough to do anything ab it anymore lol #tw transphobia #< almost forgot that one

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zombienarc · 9 months

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#To add to the other post about ‘t’ and ‘b’… I don’t really feel happy with either. I don’t think I have much romance left in me.#I just feel empty sometimes and I do things just to do them. It’s too bad. I enjoy them both as people but as far as a life with either-#-of them.. I don’t know. I don’t care to think that far about romantic relationships anymore. I don’t care to plan a life with someone so-#-tightly woven into the picture. It creeps me out and puts me off. It’s crazy to me that people like the thought of that shit. It makes me-#-uncomfortable to say the least. I see couples with their kids and I think (I’m so sorry for you). I see people around me getting pregnant-#-and I think (that’s stupid. What’s the point?).#I wish I could keep that same energy when it came to the breaking up part. I’m getting there but my ego gets in the way. I end up taking-#-it personally that someone no longer wants to be in a relationship with me. If I could get past that I would be much calmer about it-#-and treat it like the end of a business deal. Deal went bad. Simple as that.#I think people cling to the fiction of love out of boredom; fear; weakness; and ego.#Life isn’t about sex or love it’s about making shit good for yourself without needing others.#That’s what I’m working on drilling into my head. Life is fun with people but it’s not a necessity like people say it is.#It’s like a group of lonely and desperate scientists got together and declared that love and community save lives but really it just makes-#-us slaves to consumerism and eachother. What’s the point in that? To never truly make love to yourself or you mind is dreadful.#Dependence kills. It eats away at your soul until you’re nothing but a body to serve and to long. How depressing.#grey god

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loverboybrightsideghost · 9 months

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#four episodes into s2 #my thoughts are it’s kinda clunky but i’m having so much fun that i kinda don’t care #i do think they (ineffable dudes) have their work cut out for them with nina and maggie though #i kinda wish we had seen more of an established relationship btwn nina and maggie even if it was only from maggie’s pov #(since she’s the one with the crush atm)#and also i wish they were more fleshed out and when they’re introduced we have firmer ground to stand on with their characters #but oh well i guess :/#i personally don’t think this season is bad at all i would just say it’s clunky tbh. like legos that don’t exactly fit #and even if it is bad at least it’s funny and gay like come on we have so little #bluebird.txt #good omens #good omens spoilers #every time i see posts about it though i’m like i haven’t even finished watching it yet but i feel deranged #i have seen some other spoilers that are not the BIG spoiler that make me go HUH‽!!??#atp i don’t care about spoilers anymore like i unblocked the tag and everything #but i just scroll quickly past anything i don’t know yet going ‘AAAAAAA WHAT NOPE DIDNT SEE ANYTHING’ lol #i’m having a good time w it tbh :D #it also does feel very separated from s1 in my mind but that makes sense and idk that much about that like i said before s2 and the show #in general are just a different thing than the book for me #it’s another cake now

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starlooove · 11 months

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Whoever said batfam was getting too chummy ur right. I want them to stop being happy now sorry

#first of all dick needs to be shot out of the fucking sky #DO NOT LET THAT NIGGA KEEP THOSE POWERS #like he obviously isn’t but I wish he didn’t have em in the first place that was stupid #I think cass should get more mommy issues. maybe smth happens and cass ISNT ready for it #and shivas like ur getting soft #and cass who knows she doesn’t wanna be a killing machine and can’t help but feel a lil relief about this #suddenly thinks of what would’ve happened if it was an attack aimed at a friend and she wasn’t ready #IK the steph being insecure thing is overblown but also nobody ever addresses that the root of that insecurity was tim and bruce dude #THATS WHAT I WANT I want her to look back on it and actually conceptualize just how fucked up they were towards her #but at present everything’s so chill does she rlly wanna stir the pot? and then when things start going to shit does she wanna make it worse #and spirals into perfectionism to prove them wrong about shit they don’t even care about anymore bc they kinda suck smh #Tim needs relationship drama and I don’t just mean mean Bernard I mean in general like family friends all of it #I want him to be in a fucking tizzy and I want it to be bc he’s being like Bruce specifically #yj feeling he only ever talks about cases anymore him feeling like he can’t relate to Bernard bc there’s nothing there outside of RR etc.#the solution for this one is for Tim to man up and talk about his issues but he keeps tryna avoid it by doing MORE work stupid ass #and he lashes out at everyone which makes it worse. I cannot stress enough that his problems are his fault here bro ppl may encourage him #but he is absolutely doing this to himself no damsel in distress shit here #DAMIAN. tired of the hes arrogant and needs to be humbled thing I need Damian to struggle with the idea that the ppl around him think he’s #intrinsically bad and needs to be fixed. like that’s an issue I want addressed immediately.#not to be biased but I either want Damian on a new titans team hanging out with the old TT (like being babysat) OR getting civilian friends #last one is so dear to me that fic where Duke took Damián out to Gotham I NEED Damian to find some friends there and love them and shit #I’m watching mystery Inc again I need Damian with a friend group like that #DUKE. I only want good things for Duke but yknow 💔 he should struggle with the isolation that comes with being the Day guy but also from #dealing with Gotham’s press as Bruce’s only blk kid (I don’t trust dc for this) and I want him to interact with other blk gothamites and #heroes. I want him to speak with onyx and talk about Orpheus (who’s area she took over btw). I want him to talk with Jackson and Wallace #specifically about how it’s hard to bring up the topic of their personal public relations due to their skin color. nobody understands how #you can FEEL the air shift when someone’s racist and no one understands how difficult it is to react right #anyways I think Jason needs to find out bruce revived joker. and nothing specific for dick idk idrc rn. make him a supporting character for #Damian specifically actually 🤩 and honestly just make him say two words the whole run he’s had enough. love him tho #imma be honest I haven’t read enough about Babs from her perspective to know her like that so do what u will

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kissitbttr · 10 months

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this is miguel o’hara being a dick

pairing: miguel o’hara x fem!reader

miguel knows he’s fucked.

he has been neglecting you, putting his work above your needs and ditched on dates he can’t count with his fingers. at first you were okay, given that you’re dating such a busy man like him, you understand the consequences.

but you’ve had enough. there were nights where you cooked dinner, only to be left untouched by him or where you softly cried yourself in the middle of the night because he was still out. the only time he comes home is when you’re already asleep, then he left to the HQ in the morning before you’ve gotten the chance to wake up.

you confronted him about this. paid a visit to his office before going to work. Jess and Lyla had warned you to not disturb him but you managed to make them back off with a single frightening look.

yes. they are scared of you. a lot of them are. they do not want to test you at all.

the moment you stepped into his office, he didn’t even bother to look. eyes were just too focused on his work that he assumed Jess was the one who walked in.

“oh, you’re fucking your co-worker now?” your tone laced with sarcasm and anger with arms crossed over your chest,

hearing the familiar voice, he had never whipped his head so fast. “y/n? what are you doing here?”

“well” you start, heels clicking against the floor as you step towards him. “since my boyfriend has been MIA for almost a week i figured i should stopped by.”

his head shook, turning his focus back to what he thought mattered most. “not right now, mi amor. I’m working.”

“i can see that, dumbass” you respond in a cold tone. frowning as to why he couldn’t take one second off from that god damn screen. “you and me are going to get breakfast together. now. before i go to work.”

“i told you I can’t. I’m busy” he replies, brushing you off with his hand. “next time.”

“i’m a busy woman too!” your voice shakes, wanting so bad to scream at him and throw that tiny desk at his head. “but I always want to make time for you, Miguel!”

no response. he muttered something under his breath but you couldn’t hear him.

un-fucking-believable

“you’re such a fucking asshole, you know that?” tone laced with venom as you spit the words. clenching your fists by your side as you struggle to hold back the tears. “i feel like this relationship is one sided, the only person that is truly making an effort is me. you don’t—“

Miguel couldn’t take it anymore. he threw a desk and it went flying, thankfully it didn’t hit you. though your eyes went wide in shock, a loud gasp left your lips as you covered your mouth with your hands.

“you’re right! I don’t! I don’t care about some silly little fucking breakfast when the universe depends on me!” he pointed at himself as his irises turned red when he looked at you. his breathing went heavy and he still wasn’t aware how scared you were at him at that point.

“do you have any idea how fucking hard it is to keep all this shit together?! how many people will die if i don’t do what i gotta do! I don’t always like it, y/n but i have to do it! and here you are trying to play house with me it’s fucking pathetic!” he scoffed, putting his hands on hips.

oh he did not realize how much his words hurt.

the room was filled with silence. you stared at him in disbelief but remained a stoic expression. you were taught better than to be weak before any men. Miguel was no exception. your mother would be disappointed if you let a man win.

“wow” you breathed, nodding. “that was a good speech actually, the longest one I’ve ever heard you talking” you tried to sound sarcastic but how you felt and how you sounded failed you.

Miguel was quick to notice this and his features quickly soften. he reached out quickly to hold you.

“cariño i—“

“I’m returning back to my apartment by five. do not fucking look for me” it was final. the way you said it, how your eyes remained empty as you spoke to him. Miguel knew better than to test you,

but he just did and now he’s paying the price,

his heart broke when he heard you said that. you were so tired of him and you just wanted him back. you want your man back but he couldn’t see how that mattered to you.

“baby, please—“

you held your hand as you turned around. “don’t you even think about sending Jess or Miles my way.”

with that you walked out of his office without uttering another word. leaving him speechless and heartbroken. he knew better than to follow you out, it would just make things worse. he was just going to let you cool off.

he didn’t know how long it was gonna take.

it has been almost a month that you two have been living separately. and he’s losing his mind. he can’t sleep, he can’t eat, he can barely walk out of the house without seeing all the things that remind him of you. the team even sensed something is wrong because he has been more short tempered than before and it almost made the rest of spider society terrified of talking to him.

he’s gotten more violent, that’s for sure. every enemy he encountered, he would leave them bleed with their faces unrecognizable. it was his way of taking his stress out. not exactly healthy but it’ll do for now.

but he thinks that this has gotten too far. he misses you terribly, your scent, your laugh, your voice, your body, and mostly… your pussy

God, the amount of times he sniffed your panties while he jacked off as the image of you clouded his mind was simply not enough.

and now here he stands before your apartment door. dressed nicely in a white buttoned up shirt with his sleeves rolled to the elbows and a pair of black pants. his ring cladded fingers nervously grip around the boquete as the other hand shoved into his pocket.

Miguel had never been this nervous before. toeing his shoes and tapping his toes against the floor rapidly. it’s probably already been fifteen minutes that he’s standing like that staring at your door. thinking far too carefully what he wants to say.

he decides it’s now or never as he raises his fist and knock softly against the wooden door, hoping that you’re home.

“coming!” he hears your voice, his stomach somersaults hearing that after what it felt like a thousand year. “i am so hungry, why are you delivery guys always taking so—“

soon as you open the door, you freeze. definitely not the takeout delivery boy and instead it’s the one person you’ve been avoiding for God knows how long.

Miguel’s mouth hangs open slightly as he slowly taking in the sight of the gorgeous woman before him. you put on your favorite lime green night gown that stops just above your knees with a white silky robe, your hair fall down gracefully. natural curls framing your face. eyes glinting under the light, he almost falls to his knees and thank the Lord for your existence.

beauty doesn’t even begin to describe how you look tonight.

Miguel realizes how he probably looks like an idiot. clearing his throat to regain his composure as he smiles awkwardly at you. “Hi.”

you stare at him as your features then showcase a displeased expression. “what are you doing here?”

you’re leaning your body against the doorframe, arms crossed in annoyance. eyes flickering from his face to the flowers he’s holding and back up to his eyes. as much as you hate to see him, you can’t help that little feeling of butterflies in your stomach when you see the flowers he’s holding.

tulips. your favorite

he takes a one step closer to your frame, breathing out a sigh as he looks down at you. “I’m sorry, mi amor.”

that earns a scoff from you, looking away. “good start.”

“i was a horrible boyfriend.” he admits, gulping as he sees how sadness and exhaustion taking over your face just like that. “you don’t deserve that. what i said to you that day… none of it was true. you were not… pathetic, nor were the idea of having breakfast together… I appreciate every single thing we’ve done together, baby. believe me, por favor…”

a hard stare is the only thing he gets from you. the way your lips form into an angry pout and how your eyes seem to get tired and bored from his confession.

you’re a difficult person to please. he knows that.

“i know that being stress is no excuse of what I’ve done… I should’ve—fuck I should’ve done better. a month without you was like hell, mi corazon. ay, me sentí como si estuviera perdiendo la cabeza.” he sighs in frustration, head shaking as he recalls many sleepless nights. “i love you so so much. i do not want to go through that again … i know that it’s going to take forever to get your trust back and everything, but i swear on my mother’s grave that i—“

“stop talking”

he shuts his mouth after that. eyes looking up to you when he realizes you’re talking to him after a prolonged silence that’s taking over.

seeing how broken he looks almost feels like your heart got plucked. as mean as you are or as much as you wanted to look like you don’t care, you can’t when it comes to Miguel. you love this man far too much and despite his cold cold persona, that’s a huge sweetheart underneath.

“you hurt me, Miguel.” eyes casting down the floor as you try to keep your voice low. “you threw a desk to my direction…”

he shakes his head at that, resisting the urge to cradle your cheek. “lo siento, mi amor. I didn’t mean—“

“yes i know, i heard you.” you sigh, eyes closed momentarily. “you scared me”

Miguel feels his heart breaks when he hears how your voice breaks. he carefully lifts his hand to softly palm your cheek, thumb grazing against the skin. he exhales a soft sigh when you aren’t pushing him off.

“I didn’t mean to do that to you, my love. fuck, I’ve hurt you. i will never forgive myself for that. i was supposed to be the one who protect you and i was being a huge asshole.”

“a cute one though” you pout at him,

he chuckles at that, feeling the tension between you two are finally cutting down. “you’re too sweet, baby… after all i had done to you”

“nothing compared to how you treated me for the past two and a half years.” you smile sweetly at him, hand wrapping around his wrist. feeling at home once he holds you in his palm. “still a good man.”

he shakes his head in disagreement. “no, no that doesn’t excuse it… i was in the wrong.”

you hum in response, looking at the pretty flowers still in his hand. “are those for me?”

he nods with a smile, “you’re my only woman, no?”

you bite the inside of your cheek as you smile, taking it from his grasp as you sniff the pretty petals. “i love them. thank you.”

he once again goes quiet, taking another step closer. eyes looking down at your glossy lips and he can’t take it anymore. he doesn’t care if he’s stepping boundaries here. “i miss you, cariño. can i show you just how much?”

his offer sends shiver down your spine, making it impossible for you to stand still. Miguel always knows your sweet spot, how to make your knees feel wobbly without having him to touch you.

you do miss him touching you,

“i have a ballet class to teach tomorrow, papi. Saturday morning class, you remember ?” a pout formed on your lips, yet you still allow him to pull you close to him as he closes the door behind. “plus don’t you have work too? i bet Jess needs you.”

Migue nearly growls at you calling him ‘papi’. his jeans growing tight as you look up to him with doe eyes that you know he loves. though sometimes, you don’t understand the effect you have on him.

“that can wait… you’re more important to me than anything” he whispers, giving your open hand a kiss. large palm coming down to grip your waist, giving it a light squeeze. “do you want me too?”

you respond with a slow nod, biting back a smile as you interlock your hand with his pulling him inside. his smirk grows wider as he leans over to capture your mouth in his,

“let me fuck you real good then we can come home, eh mi vida?” he promises against your lips, slipping your soft silky robe off of you before picking you up in bridal style causing to shriek and giggle,

“i wanna hear you scream my name.”

part 2?

#miguel o’hara blurbs #miguel o’hara smut #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara angst

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whimsyprinx · 1 year

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the feeling like I have no one who is truly my friend deffo doesn’t help with feeling like I’ll never be happy but like there’s not anything to be done about that either

#whimsy whispers #I was suppose to discuss things with my singular irl today but was honestly too tired and unable to hold a proper conversation #so missed my chance there until god knows when #and honestly even if I tell them how I feel I don’t think things are going to be fixed #I don’t know how they can be fixed #I just know how I feel and all I can do is tell them how I feel while stressing that I’m not saying anything to make them feel bad or place #blame on them #then for every other friendship it feels hopeless #I can’t discuss how I feel with anyone because I’ve already done so with nothing changing or me just being a burden on people by being #insecure and seeking validation that they can’t give #i have no stable friendships #and I don’t think there’s anything I can do to fix any of them #currently I’m just self isolating again which blah blah blah is bad but does it even matter anymore #half of my friends pay me no mind and wouldn’t even notice or care #the others will eventually give up #there’s a good few who won’t even look my way even when I’m attempt and trying so hard to stay in contact #I only hear from them on a whim and it hurts a lot especially when their messages are something about wanting to talk to me more and then I #try and nothing works out #I do genuinely think in each of these relationships the only problem is me and I’m sure I’m doing lots and lots wrong I just don’t know how #to fix any of it #like with everything I don’t know how to fix anything and it’s overwhelming #sorry for the abundance of sad posts I do think this is A Breakdown and like there’s just nothing to be done about it there isn’t anything I #can do about this either #I’m so useless even to myself #I can’t do anything right

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nope-body · 1 year

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#I don’t know what to do about my parents #I can’t just completely cut them out of my life and I don’t want to #even if it means they might end up hurting me again and again #but like. I don’t want them involved in my life any more than they have to be #and everything’s so much more confusing because they’re like. trying to be better?#which is good! but they haven’t actually changed. they still do the same things that hurt me and still hurt my sister #but now they get to say they’re trying as an additional guilt trip #and the problem is that some of their actions have actually changed! but it’s all surface level #they’re concerned about my health because doctors have validated my issues #they still want to know my grades and where I am #they are as controlling as they can get without them having to actually acknowledge that they’re being controlling #the thing that’s changed is that I’m legally an adult now and several states away #they still find ways to make me feel bad about things I care about and I barely talk to them #I don’t know how they’ll react to new things anymore and that’s what’s scariest because I used to be able to predict it #I really don’t know whether they care about me or care about who they think I am or want to think they care about me #I used to be more certain that they only cared about who they thought I was and about thinking that they cared about me #and now I genuinely don’t know again!#but I also know that how they’ve treated me growing up has forever impacted our relationship #I mean. I wouldn’t be staying on campus and lying to keep my parents from visiting if it hadn’t #other people say they look forward to seeing their family over break. other people call their parents regularly (not all but a number).#other people miss their parents #and I really really don’t

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cherry-leclerc · 2 months

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pride ☆ mv1

genre: smut, established relationship, stubborn!max, jealous!max, humor, fluff

word count: 3k

After his DNF, Max finds himself losing his temper when you keep insisting that it was his fault. Due to both ends, you find yourself in a constant battle on who can admit defeat first.

nsfw warning under the cut!

18+... gym sex - that's all teheee

req!...super fun to write, thank u, anon for the idea !!

He never liked to be pointed out as the one who did something wrong on track. Then again, he rarely ever made those types of mistakes. Max got along with everyone on the grid, but he was there to win. And he certainly did not need his girlfriend reminding him that he’s human, just like the rest of the drivers.

“Just admit it already, you fucked up this time. You cut him off.”

A DNF was as bad as it could get, his mood quickly deteriorated as he bangs his helmet against the wall. If you weren’t used to his dark behavior, then you would have definitely worried. Instead, you tap your foot impatiently with a deep sigh, eyes rolling with strong annoyance. You didn’t like to see him like this, but it drove you crazy that he could never own up to his wrongdoings.

The Dutch harshly rips off his balaclava, dirty blond hair sticking against his angry face, normally baby blue eyes switching to a devilish color. “You’re such a…” A deep growl. “He cut me off, and that’s what got us both out of the race. What a fucking dick.”

Your brow raises up, pointing at him with accusement. “My thoughts exactly.” Turning on your heel, you spin around and walk out of his driver's room, leaving him to sulk like a manchild. Stupid, Lando.

As soon as the race ends, you sheepishly make your way to the young Brit. “Is he mad?” he asks. You shrug as if you care about what your boyfriend is feeling at this very moment. Max wasn’t the kind to get mad, he got furious.

“He’ll get over it. Though I do suggest you run the opposite way if you spot him.” He laughs, eyes crinkling with agreement. After apologizing on behalf of the grumpy Dutchman, you hurry off to find him. Propped up against the door frame, you nervously play with the hem of your dress as you inch your way closer. You can practically see the color red blooming out of him as he smiles bitterly.

“And where were you?” His voice expands softly, it makes your stomach churn, but you put on a brave face nonetheless, refusing to give in to his ego. It doesn’t matter. He chuckles, rolling his tongue against the inside of his cheek, head shaking in disapproval. “Aren’t I the one you should be consoling? I don’t see why you had to go see him.”

Your eyebrows narrow down sharply. “Max, you’re being a fucking baby, you caused the crash! Lando was just unlucky and I went to let him know, is that so wrong?”

The Dutch fumes, jaw clenching. “You can go see him, I don’t give a fuck, but stop saying it was my fault. He closed in on me.” You scoff, arms crossed. “This is pure bullshit.”

“Whatever, I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I’m glad you’re alright,” you sourly say, pushing past him to go and retrieve your things, getting ready to leave back to the hotel. His nose twitches, following after you. Neither of you utter a single word, simply packing and strolling out the door. As soon as the media gets involved and Lando walks by with a shy smile and wave, he instinctively grabs your hand, leading you through the tight crowd with a bright smile, despite his crash.

Setting aside your differences, you’re grateful for his sweet gesture, even if it laces with a bit of possessiveness. The drive is tense, only the sound of the blinker being heard. You try adding some music, but as soon as he turns off the radio, you turn to him, hair slapping your flushed face. “Why did you do that?” Your hand slides back up, turning it on. He repeats his same actions, leaving you to burn lasers to the side of his head.

“Your music is complete shit.” Surprised by his cold tone, your right eye twitches like a crazy person before turning your attention back towards the road. He feels bad. He’s not mad at you, not even at his friend. But he wasn’t the biggest fan of letting his team down, and much less, owning up to it.

Pushing the door open, you march in, making your way to the bathroom, ready to shower off the irritation. Max trails after you without a second thought, then you slam the door right on his face. He blinks. He can hear you turning the water on, stripping down. “You’re taking a shower by yourself this time, you dickhead.”

The next few races run smoother as he finishes in first place for most of them. All of them, actually. But his wins aren’t worth it in the end. Not with your rigid congratulations, forced kisses as you wait for him along with a puddle of photographers. It shouldn’t strike him as strange; you were still upset. For a second, he considers putting his pride aside and try to fix things, make amends, but when you mumble next to him, he quickly throws that out the window.

“Baby finally got fed his bottle.”

All his pent up emotions came rushing back as you wear an innocent smile. With a sullen glare, he walks out, leaving you to gloat. Two can play that game.

Here’s the thing with yours and Max's relationship; it was amazing. A fucking dream. You loved each other like crazy, but when you both get into an argument, it can drag out for the longest time. Your friends had pointed it out countless times, accusing you two for being freakishly stubborn. Oftentimes, he’d be the first to give up and apologize, and sometimes it was you. Only this time, it looked like a long haul.

It was a weird dynamic. He still kissed you goodbye, reminded you how much he loved you. You still attended his races, glowed with sincere happiness for every podium of his, but apart from that, you two still held on to your end of the rope. And it’s been so long. One month? Maybe two?

“Four fucking months,” Max grunts, large hands fixing his drinking straw that connects to his suit. The Dutch is clearly frustrated, Checo could tell as he warily eyes his teammate. The Mexican driver poured out an amused chuckle. Max curls a dark brow. “What?”

Checo halts. “Nothing, man. You’re just being so…how do I put this nicely?” He clicks his fingers enthusiastically. “You’re acting like a douchebag. Puras pendejadas, lo que estás haciendo.” The blue eyed boy shakes his head.

“I don’t know what you mean by that.” He walks away.

“It means you’re doing stupid shit for absolutely no reason. Take it from me, I’m married! I know what I’m talking about, and as your elder, I suggest apologizing. It’ll fix everything, trust me.” But Max only ignores him, already climbing into his car. As much as he would love to try and make things right with the woman he adores like a complete idiot, there’s always something that ruins it. Whether it’s you witty reminders, or your cruel ignorance.

Though, he feels like he’s going crazy. He can feel his hands itch as they beg to hug you the way they were used to. Or to kiss your plump lips, slightly red from your constant nibbles. You can feel his eyes on you as you cut up a group of vegetables, getting things ready for dinner. Like a tease, you bend down to pick up the bag of carrots that had just fallen. You giggle. “Whoops.”

Abruptly, he stands up. “I’m going to get in a small workout before we eat.” That’s all. Left there with your jaw on the floor, you slam the knife against the cutting board.

You missed him. You’d be insane not to. You missed cuddling with him after a long day. You missed the way he would cradle your face to kiss you eagerly after every win. Now it’s almost as if you’re a couple of strangers with the way he keeps a careful distance. And if he wasn’t going to fix things, then you would force him to.

He hears you before he actually sees you. Not a single word escapes past your lips as you skip closer. His molars grind together when he notices your tiny skirt, paired with a tank top. Perky tits salute him as he holds back a groan. Smiling sweetly, you start to stretch. “Thought I’d join you. Didn’t want to eat without you.”

His heart squeezes, ghostly nodding. Adjusting himself on the bench, he starts his set of overhead presses. Loopy eyes circle his glistening muscles as he pants tiredly, shaky breaths bouncing off of him. You have to physically stop yourself from drooling an entire ocean.

The blue eyed boy leads an impressive set, a thin layer of sweat coating him like a blanket. One you would gladly roll around in. Pursing your lips, your limbs feel extremely weak all of a sudden and decide to settle with laying down and bringing your legs up, skirt sliding down, exposing your soft skin.

“So tight,” you whine when you reach up, muscles tied up in an uncomfortable spot. Intrigued, your boyfriend takes a peek and instantly curses, large hands gripping against the metal bar. He gulps. “Maxie, can you push my legs back for me?”

His breath hitches. “No. I’m sure you can do that yourself.”

Sitting up straight, you squint your beady eyes at him as he distracts himself by adding more weight to his set. You click your tongue, a menacing grin tugging at your pink lips. “Messed up, baby, you are messed up.”

Max curses himself for falling in love with someone as beautiful as you. It seriously messed him up a concerning amount. Suddenly there was no more cold demeanor when it came to you. That simply just belonged to the rest because you were everything to him.

“First, you’re too much of a pussy to admit your mistakes and now you’re too scared to get near me?” You scoff. “It’s all starting to add up.”

Except at this very moment.

“And what exactly is that? If you don’t mind me asking.”

Kneeling down onto the black mat, you stretch your arms out against it, and lay your back flat. You hum. “Oh.” You arch your back, ass angling upwards where his eyes quickly trace to. You smirk. “Nothing.”

If he weren’t so impressed by your bratty act, he would have definitely walked out on you. But you just looked so pretty, rosy, and you were glistening. He wonders what else there was on top of that. The Dutch moves on to a bench press. Huffing, he grits his teeth as he extends his arm before puffing and bringing them back down.

The 26 year old, despite your attempts, was as focused as he could possibly be. The adrenaline was lingering in his entire system as he kept his eyes trained upward. Chest locking tightly, muscles contracting. And then he hears it. Your tiny moans, soft whimpers.

The loud sound of him dropping the weight makes you jump up a bit before looking up. He finds you in your first position you had started with when you first stepped foot into the home gym. He can feel his cock press harshly against his white shorts. “Why are you…” He trails off when your mouth drops open, brows scrunching together. Your thighs beg to be kissed. Slippery arms tug your legs closer to you as you giggle.

“My legs are too tight.” His chest tightens. “Help me get more flexible?” you press innocently as you signal for him to push your legs. “Please, Maxie.”

Sighing, he nods. As soon as he steps close to you, he can feel your pouring lust, fuck me eyes staring back up at his frame. Grabbing the heels of your feet, he pushes back as you groan. “Oh shit.” You laugh, chest vibrating against the mat. “I really needed the extra push.”

He grimaces. A silence lingers between you two before you wiggle your left foot against his palm. He raises a confused brow. I’m going to tuck it to my chest. Just hold the right one. Doing as instructed, you sigh in relief, lashes fluttering. He holds back a much needed grunt. “You’re telling me you couldn’t do this yourself?”

You nip the air. “We’re not all professional athletes, Max. I needed you.”

You can see how hard your implication is hitting him as his gaze darkens. And just as he’s about to reach out for you, you wiggle your brows. Next leg. Snapping out of trance, he eyes the way your skirt rides down your skin. In a swift movement, he lets go and takes a staggered step back. You grin. What’s wrong?

“You’re crazy.”

Standing up, you place both hands on your waist. “Why?”

Max doesn’t even recall when he pins you against the wall, your hair flying from the impactful blow, and yet, you’re smirking. Kissing you harshly, you groan, leaning against your tippy toes as you struggle to breath. He seems to be lost in your lips as he cradles your face, teeth clashing against yours at the filthy action. “You’re so beautiful,” he pants, blues staring back. “So fucking beautiful.”

Whimpering, you reach back out for him, plump lips attacking his thick neck as he sighs. The purple bruises were definitely something he would hound you on tomorrow, but for now that was the least of his worries. Admiring the colorful spot, you lick it slowly. He shudders.

“I can suck something else, you know?”

You almost don’t recognize his growl, for you haven’t heard it in so long, that it catches you by surprise as he spins you around, bending you over the nearest counter, where his wall of protein stands. He hitches your skirt up as you gasp when his fingers slide inside of you. The way he stretches you out makes you see stars as you struggle to keep upward.

“Wore this just for me, right? You knew it would drive me crazy?” His long fingers curl at the perfect angle as you nod. Yes, yes. I wore it just for you. I knew you’d like it. You squeal when he lifts you up, tits pressing against the cold marble, legs dangling like a doll. His doll. He watches the way you swallow his digits. “I fucking love it, baby…”

Then, he’s down on his knees as he wraps his lips around your clit. Moaning loudly, you press your cheek against the cool tiles, saliva dripping out of your mouth at the sensation. In your fucked up state, you still reach out for him as he grabs your hand. “You taste so sweet,” he hums. You’re close to crying when he pulls away, but calm down when he thrusts into you.

The Dutch throws his head back as soon as your velvety walls wrap around his cock, the way you swallow him whole. Makes him hate himself for holding onto his pride for so long. For keeping you away. His heart races when you prop yourself on your elbows as stare back at him with tired, lustful eyes. He grins, slapping your ass as you yelp. You ass tilts up as he watches you struggle to keep up.

Warm hands come up to keep you close to him as you bite down on your lip. “You’re a fucking brat, but God, I hate it because you were right. I pushed him off. I did, I did, I did…” His dirty hair sticks against his face as you bounce forward with every pound. “But he was making you laugh - smile - and I just couldn’t handle that.”

Your heart stops. This was news to you because there was no way the Max you knew so well would break his winning streak all due to a friendly encounter. He pecks your bare shoulder. “I don’t think you understand how much I love you.”

“Then show me.”

WIth that, he holds onto your hips with more grip as his tip brushes repeatedly against your g-spot. You’re a mess, but he’s loving every second of it. As soon as he wraps a large hand around your breast, you’re gone, spluttering white all around him as he follows. With a croaky groan, he slips out as you fall back to your original spot. He chuckles. He fixes your skirt before helping you sit up to face him. Your eyes crinkle.

“You love me,” you say in a sing-song voice as you poke his dimple. I thought I made that clear. You scrunch your nose, pecking his face all over with sloppy kisses. He playfully winces, but accepts nonetheless. “You love me, love me. Why would you ever worry about me and Lando? You know he’s just a friend.”

His smile drops as it's replaced with a scowl. “I wasn’t worried, per se. I don’t like someone else making you laugh. That’s my job.”

Your brows arch. “What are you suggesting? That I just keep mute for the rest of my days, unless I’m with you?”

Max shrugs. “Sounds like a solid plan.”

You smack his chest as he throws his head back with laughter. “No. Not a solid anything. Max, I love you.”

“I know,” he whispers.

“Okay,” you confirm, fixing your posture, lips pursing. “But please never do that again, that’s just plain out dangerous and crazy. A big no-no, Emilian.” He glares and your lips wobble childishly. “You love wins, and I love celebrating them with you. It just works.”

“You know what doesn’t work?” he retorts as he hugs you. You hum, comfortable against his warmness. “Not talking to me for four months, what were you thinking?” You push him away abruptly. We spoke! “But we didn’t fuck, and that’s the same thing.”

Crossing your arms, you roll your eyes as he stares back in awe. “If you keep this up then I’m going to crank it up to eight,” you threaten.

The Dutch nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck before you cave in. “Let’s not do that. You’d be breaking my heart.”

taglist: @myownwritings @d3kstar @crucifiedbitch

*note: i've only tagged those who asked to be included in general. i've kept that apart from the method acting series taglist!! lmk in which you would like to be, just in case!

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