So, the DfE have released their non-statutory guidance for schools on "gender questioning children". I know much has been made of the idea of outing trans children to their parents, but I think the guidance actually has far more concerning sections. And by concerning I mean "deeply transphobic and fucked up".
I know some people are happy it's non statutory, but let's be explicit, this document is transphobic, it's dogwhistle politics, and it's existence will directly harm trans people.
Ironically, the DfE's own lawyers have advised that this guidance is likely illegal and contravenes the equality act.
I think the idea that there are lots of students who are fully transitioned in school but not out at all at home is a bit of a strawman from both sides. In my experience (and I've mentioned this on tumblr before), a school would not normally encourage this if a student was genuinely at risk at home if outed, because even if all the teachers knew not to out the students, you can't control the behaviour of other students/parents etc. I think it's a bit of a right wing scare tactic "Schools are transitioning your kids without your consent". It's a fascist dog whistle.
In my experience as a teacher, the vast majority of trans kids I've taught were transitioning socially at home and school. Some did only use their chosen name/pronouns in school, but parents were aware.
But this straw man has been used to build a document which is deeply transphobic and wide reaching and will defacto exclude some trans kids from school, or from school sports, or from attending a school where they feel comfortable.
Trans kids exist. Kids can know they are trans from a young age, and there is no harm to anyone from allowing social transition at a young age. Some kids transition back to their assigned gender at birth. That doesn't mean anyone was harmed. But this guidance explicitly presents the idea of transition as both harmful to the person transitioning and those around them. Which is fucked up.
The new guidance has some really concerning bits in it which will seriously negatively impact all trans students. Here are some quotes below, with my comments in italics. Please note I'm quoting directly from a document that uses transphobic language:
-Primary school aged children should not have different pronouns to
their sex-based pronouns used about them. (This is fucked, I cannot stress how fucked this is. These kids exist and simply pretending they don't is awful in the extreme. The idea that children can't socially transition at primary school is really messed up. )
-schools and colleges should only agree to a change of pronouns if they are confident that the benefit to the individual child outweighs the impact on the school community. It is expected that there will be very few occasions in which a school or college will be able to agree to a change of pronouns. On these rare occasions, no teacher or pupil should be compelled to use these preferred pronouns. (How does a child using pronouns of choice impact the school community? It doesn't? In my experience, teens are much more accepting of trans classmates than some adults. Also giving teachers explicit permission to misgender kids is fucking dangerous).
-schools and colleges should exhaust all other options, such as using firstnames, to avoid requiring other individuals having to use preferred pronouns. (My initial response to this was "why the fuck" but a trans friend commented that the purpose is to make trans people's lives as difficult and as miserable as possible, and they're going after the most vulnerable trans people- trans kids)
-If a child does not want to use the toilet designated for their biological sex, and the school or college has considered all the relevant factors outlined above, they may wish to consider whether they can provide or offer the use of an alternative toilet facility. (this is weird because I'm pretty sure it contravenes the equality act, I'm pretty sure there is a legal duty on schools, and certainly colleges where over 18s attend to provide gender neutral toilet facilities if required. Also, not having an appropriate toilet defacto excludes children from school).
-Schools may have different uniform requirements for girls and boys. Some specify which uniform items are for girls and which are for boys, and similarly some schools have hairstyle rules which differ by sex. A child who is gender questioning should, in general, be held to the same uniform standards as other children of their sex at their school and schools may set clear rules to this effect. (So some schools could, for example, force a trans boy or non binary student to wear a skirt. Which is unfair and messed up. To be honest, I think sex segregated uniforms belong in the dark ages anyway, but this is just ridiculous.).
-There is no general duty to allow a child to ‘social transition’. (Firstly, there legally is. Secondly, why would a school not want to? This just gives licence to transphobic heads to say "oh, no, we won't allow you to transition", which is illegal, but the whole thing is just such a fucking mess. And again, why? Why would you not allow a child to transition socially? Unless you want to pretend that trans children don't exist?)
If you want to read the full guidance, it's available here, but trigger warnings etc do apply: https://consult.education.gov.uk/equalities-political-impartiality-anti-bullying-team/gender-questioning-children-proposed-guidance/supporting_documents/Gender%20Questioning%20Children%20%20nonstatutory%20guidance.pdf
Yes, the guidance is non-statutory, so in theory schools could ignore it, but in reality, OFSTED etc can use non-statutory guidance as a stick to beat schools with. At this stage, I think we all know the OFSTED don't give a fuck about anyone's mental health or wellbeing.
Interestingly, even the DfE's own lawyers have admitted the advice could open schools up to a legal challenge. This SchoolsWeek article on the topic is super interesting: https://schoolsweek.co.uk/trans-guidance-dfe-lawyers-said-schools-face-high-risk-of-being-sued/
Anyway, whilst the fact it's non statutory is something, this is not the victory some people are making it out to be, and the fact a document encouraging misgendering children has been published at all is fucked. This document could very much be used to prevent children from transitioning, and will likely prevent some children who have transitioned from attending school.
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Part one: The First Day of School
Veronica
It was the first day of school, but not just the first day, the first day of my senior year. When I first started my freshman year I dreamed of this day, strolling into the school, finally the top of the high school food chain, my friends by my side nervous but excited because we were finally there, so many things to look forward to this year. Instead I am walking into a new school, in a new town, the only person I know is my Step brother Jason and he doesn't acknowledge that I am a living human being, which in all reality is fine because he is a major tool anyway. He is the most popular guy in school and can't be seen with the dorky new girl, he has a reputation to uphold. He even went as far as dropping me off down the street so that no one would associate me with him and his perfect cheerleader girlfriend Chrissy Cunningham. Asshole.
I walk up to the school and through the doors and was thankful that a couple of days earlier I was able to do a walkthrough with the Principal so at least I knew where I was going. The hallway was full chatter and excitement, teenagers high fiveing and hugging, happy to be seeing each other again after a few months apart. I make my way to my first class, room 102 , Ms. O'Donnell's class and find a chair in the back of the classroom. I forced a smile on my face to appear approachable, after all I do want to make friends so I am not completely alone this year, I can feel my cheeks turning red as my classmates walk in and stare at me, oh look there is someone new in class. Holy social anxiety.
A woman walks into the classroom with an armful of books and sets them down on the desk, Ms. O'Donnell I presume and the classroom starts to quiet down. The bell rings, teacher closes the classroom door and it is time for class to begin. The learning, book work has always been the easy part of school for me, it is a total lack of self confidence that I struggle with.
" Hello class I am Ms. O Donnell, welcome to my classroom, I hope you all had a wonderful summer but are eager to be back and ready to learn-"
The door to the classroom opens and a tall shaggy haired boy strolls in, smile on his face.
"Ms. O Donnell it is a pleasure to see you, again,-"
" Ahh, Mr. Munson the bane of my existence, nice to see that you have decided to join us."
" Ms. O Donnell, I can feel it , this year is our year, second times a charm?"
"Mr. Munson please take a seat in the back of the classroom so we can carry on with class."
" You got it teach."
I watched as his eyes scanned the classroom and landed on the empty seat beside me. As he made his way passed the front rows one of the jocks in the front of the room hollered "Freak!"
He stopped and turned in the direction of the insult," Oh hey Troy, see things haven't changed much over the summer, your still a dick."
"Mr.Munson-"
" Sorry, I'm sorry for disrupting you class.Please carry on." He continued walking back until he reached my table. " Hey, your new? This seat taken?"
I felt my cheeks grow hot again. " Nope, all yours."
He spun his chair around and sat , arms casually draped over the back of his chair as he leaned forward.
I tried to play cool but oh. My. God. Was he gorgeous. I mean I knew he was good looking when he walked in,but up close , damn.
He looked over at me . " Hi, I'm Eddie Munson. What's your name ?" He flashed me a wide smile and extended his hand.
I slowly reached out and shook his hand. "Veronica Montgomery."
"Well Hello Veronica Montgomery, welcome to Hawkins."
I smiled shyly." Thank you Eddie Munson."
I turned my attention back to the teacher and listened as she rambled on about the upcoming course curriculum, what she expected from us this year etc,etc,and even a couple times felt the gaze of the gorgeous boy next to me upon me. I tried to distract myself by reaching into my bag and pulling out a notebook and pencil, my reading glasses.
"Hey, Ronnie, do you have a pencil I can borrow?" Eddie whispered, leaning in a little.
" Uh sure, " I leaned over and grabbed an extra pencil out of my backpack and handed it over.
He smirked." Happen to have an extra piece of paper?"
I flipped open my notebook and as quietly as I could ripped a couple pieces of paper out and handed them to him.
" Thanks new girl." He smiled again.
"Anytime." I smiled back. I bring my attention back to the teacher and start copying down notes she is writing on the chalkboard until I see a piece of paper slide in front of me. It reads,
"How long have you been in Hawkins? Where are you from?"
I jot down " Two months, and I am Originally from California, moved to Indiana last year to live with my grandparents then to Hawkins two months ago." I carefully slid the paper back then tried focusing on Ms. O Donnell again until the paper slid back in front of me.
" From Cali? Wow, must be a drag being in Hawkins then."
" It's nice, quiet. I am ok with being out of the city. I thought you would need the paper and pencil to write notes."I slid it back then looked over with a smile.
He read the note and smirked I watched him write a quick note and pass it back quickly." I am writing notes, to you. I am just trying to get to know my new classmate."
" That is sweet. You know, your not going to pass this class the second time around if I keep distracting you." I passed it back
He laughed out loud and Ms O'Donnell looked back at him.
" Mr. Munson?"
"Sorry, I promise I will stop being a distraction to the class."
She stared him down for a minute then turned back to the board.
I wrote ," Busted." On my notebook and tipped it towards him.
He smiled and shook his head then wrote" Thanks for getting me in trouble." On his paper.
"You started it, I think we should pay attention now. You don't want to start off the school year on the wrong foot Mr. Munson." I tipped it towards him for the last time and watched another smile spread across his face.
I focused the rest of class on actual school work a little disappointed that I let myself get so easily distracted, but after all he was the first person to talk to me.
The bell rang and Ms O'Donnell dismissed the class but replied " Ms. Montgomery, Mr Munson please meet me at my desk please."
" Oh shit, we are in for it now." Eddie backed out of his chair as I packed my things into my bag and slung it around my shoulder, did she see us passing notes?
" Do you think so? No way." But my heart was beating a little faster as we both walked up to her desk.
" Ms. Montgomery I just want to say that I am very happy to have you in my class this year. I looked over your grades and GPA and I am very impressed. High honors throughout your high school career."
I finally let out a breath,"Thank you Ms. O'Donnell. I am excited to be attending Hawkins High this year."
" I am excited that you have signed up for the peer tutoring program, which brings me to why you are here Mr. Munson. Remember how you said this was going to be your year? Well, you are a very lucky boy, Eddie, we have paired you up with Ms. Montgomery. "
I could feel my cheeks heat up again as he looked over at me. " I am a very lucky guy. What a wonderful opportunity to start out the school year on the right foot." He smiled.
"Ms. Montgomery will be a great asset to you this year. She has signed up to help out a student in every subject and since you fit into that category we assigned her to you."
" I am greatful to have this opportunity to work with you, Ms. Montgomery."
I smiled shyly " Happy to help."
" We will meet up in the library after school to coordinate your schedules.I will see you both then.And Eddie, I wouldn't screw this up"
" There is no way I am going to screw this up. Thank you Veronica."
" I will do my best to get you to graduation." I smiled again,"If you'll both excuse me, I need to find my way to my next class. I will see you after school."
" I could show you?"
" That would be great, thanks!"
I followed Eddie out of the room and down the hall, and I couldn't help but notice how nicely his jeans fit him.
" So you are smart and sassy? " he turned to look at me.
I bit my lip," So that is the vibe I give off from my notes? I guess I didn't make a great first impression."
"Are you kidding? I appreciate a some sass and sarcasm, keeps me on my toes." He stopped in front of a classroom led me to the door taking a step back." We have arrived at your destination."
" Thanks for walking me here and being so nice."
" Your welcome. I'll see you after school."
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diaries of a burnt out highschooler: meet the students !! pt. 1
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student files opened!!
"and if i failed to earn blue ribbon, how could i ever be forgiven? tell me, what love would still be given, from you?"- top of my school, katherine lynn-rose
name: reiji kawasaki
age: 16
likes: sleeping, headphones and music, coffee, his hoodies, looking through random topics at midnight, novels and manga, history, and affirmation and validation (mostly academically)
dislikes: loud noises, spacing out, unable to sleep though he has done many activities in trying to do so, staying up at night doing assignments/reviewing, his dad, and being compared to his dad.
background:
born as the only son of seamstress Ayane Kawasaki and Ryota Kawasaki, a Business Analyst, Reiji was raised almost solely by his mother, rarely seeing his father at any point in his life, he described his father as a workaholic who was only there for him financially, not even participating in Reiji's graduations, sports day, and even birthdays, with Ryota barely even being there for his wife as well, and never being there for her emotionally, it is recalled by Reiji that he once found his mother crying in the dining room alone due to Ryota not being there for Reiji, it is also noted by Reiji during this time that he barely saw his mother truly smile, though she constantly smiled around him, that there was a heavy form of tiredness and sadness in her eyes opposing her smile, which caused Reiji to try and do anything in his power as a child to see his mother truly smile at him even once.
one day after coming home perfectly passing a quiz in the second grade, Reiji ran up to his mother excitedly exclaiming his achievement, once his mother checked the paper, Reiji finally noticed for once that his mother was smiling truly, seeing the fulfillment in her eyes and hearing her cheerful voice and embracing him so eagerly, seeing this, this caused Reiji to constantly pass his classes with top marks, always finding fulfillment in seeing his mother truly happy, always treasuring his mothers smile during graduation photos once he was rewarded with his medal(s).
somewhere during this time, reiji would meet tadashi due to tadashi's mother asking services of reiji's, this would cause them to usually being influenced to talk to each other by their mothers, which unfortunately would result in them either slightly arguing or not talking at all. this would change once reiji brought his favorite book at that time, i am cat, which was also a favorite of tadashis', causing them to bond over it and create a friendship with each other, which would carry on to high school now as best friends, though only talking through text due to tadashi's new social life and many school activities.
personality:
Reiji is noted by his teachers and classmates as antisocial and reserved, rarely speaking if not spoken to by Tadashi or the teacher, and due to this, unintentionally comes across as intimidating and uncaring for those around him, due to this, nobody has come up to him for years if not for a school project. It is also noted that Reiji usually using sarcasm as his humor, usually rolling his eyes mentally when something annoys him, even his eyes coming off clearly to what he's probably telling you.
however, Reiji is not fully antisocial, usually becoming talkative to those he's around, however knowing when to shut up and stay quiet, his topics usually going by random, from his sudden interests in certain things, to his hobbies etc.
however, outside the eyes of everyone around him, Reiji is a desperate people pleaser, mostly to his mother, desiring her to be as happy as possible while making her forget the pain his father is causing her for as much as possible, due to this, this also caused Reiji to be heavily self-reliant, as he never asked anything from his mother, only relying on himself as he would see himself as a burden when he asks for the smallest things and help, this would also apply to his friends, never asking much of them and would deny any sort of hand from them though his situation would heavily need it at times.
this validation also caused Reiji to barely care for himself either, losing sleep to studying and reviewing for the next exam or test, and due to his tiredness, would forget his basic needs, forgetting to shower at night during weekdays, this would be much more common on weekends, usually staying inside his room sleeping in, only partaking in his needs when his mother or friends remind him too, it is also noted that he loathes being compared to his father, being highlighted once one of the teachers told him that he reminded them of his father who had the same "anti-socialness" as him, which caused him to politely shake his head and deny such things, stressing once alone that he may become him one day and hurt the people around him like what his father did to Reiji and his mother.
trivia:
reiji is an intp.
reiji's favorite foreign food are nuggets.
reiji's comfort food is taiyaki.
reiji is a gay demisexual.
reiji usually commits typos and would be lazy to correct them at times.
he peels off his mouth's skin and would usually zone out in school and in his room when he's not sleeping.
it is implied that if reiji had the choice of choosing between his father and mother, he'd choose his mother with no hesitation.
tysm if you read all of this !! i wanted to share more of my oc's here for no apparent reason lol while also using these as my highlights when i finally write the story hehe
i'll make the two other protagonists, tadashi and kyomi's profile later !! i hope you liked this and see you next time !!
mika out !!
pls note that none of these pictures or dividers are mine !! they all belong to their respective owners and the only original items in this post are the oc and profile, tyy !! <33
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Big Daddy (1999) Review
Big Daddy
Directed by Dennis Dugan
Year Released: 1999
Duration: 93 Minutes
Filming Format: 35mm
Video: Colour
Audio: Dolby 2.0 Surround
Language: English
Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1
Joey Lauren Adams Marathon 1/3
Adam Sandler's 1999 film, Big Daddy, tells the story of Sonny Koufax (Adam Sandler), a law school dropout, living in comfort on the settlement money he had earned a year prior (due to an altercation with a taxicab). Life is drastically changed for Sonny when a boy named Julian (Cole Sprouse, Dylan Sprouse) is dropped at his door. The child turns out to be the illegitimate son of Sonny's roommate Kevin Garrity (Jon Stewart) who is away on business in China. In a convoluted scheme to prove he is responsible to his girlfriend, Sonny decides to pose as Kevin to social services, caring for the child himself.
Sonny begins by allowing Julian to make his own decisions such as picking his clothing, what he eats, when he sleeps, etc. While this parenting method makes Julian happy, it quickly unravels once he is enrolled in school. The teacher quickly complains about Julian’s lack of progress, personal hygiene, fashion sense, and tendency to relieve himself on the walls or in potted plants. Finally grasping the severity of the situation, Sonny makes a change with the aide of Layla (Joey Lauren Adams) in raising Julian. The hard work put into both Julian’s development and Sonny's maturing as an adult is soon tested when social services begin to ask questions regarding Sonny's true identity.
While Big Daddy did not perform as well with critics as its preceding films (Roger Ebert gave the film one and a half stars out of four), it is a turning point in Sandler's career. Once known for his raunchy, nonsensical, and abrasive comedy, we now see a softer side to Sandler's character. We see a man who wants to change, a man who deep down craves responsibility and leaves behind his younger years of partying for something more meaningful.
The film also serves as, what I believe to be, a very important part of modern history in the terms of Hollywood's transition in accepting the LGBT community. Peter Dante and Allen Covert play two guys who were a part of Sonny's law school friend group. They, later on, discover their sexuality and are now in a relationship. While occasionally taking shots at their expense (in a good-hearted fashion) and Jonathan Loughran's character expressing visible discomfort, the film shows us men that are willing to at least try to understand. Sonny at one point explains to Layla "Nothing really changed, we just watch a different kind of porno now." This line drives across the main theme of love the film presents. In a notoriously misogynistic, prejudiced industry, we have one of the world's most popular comedians exclaiming it doesn't matter who you love, and that acceptance and caring are learned virtues that can be attained as long as you're willing to be open-minded.
At times the jumps from humour to sentimentality can be jarring but I feel it works in favour of the film. The transition of emotions is messy, but so is raising a child. It's messy, chaotic, confusing, and overwhelming. Sometimes things don't make sense but things will work out if you persist in your love for your child, partner, or friend.
Overall one of my favourites of Sandler's 90s movie run, ranking close to Billy Maddison. Sandler in his earlier years is obsessed with the theme of having to grow up and he has somewhat manifested this theme in his own life. We all know and love the goofy SNL era of Adam Sandler, many of us even love his raunchy later-in-life comedies like Grown Ups (mostly for nostalgia's sake), and we get to see him as a mature actor now in films like Punch Drunk Love and Uncut Gems.
-- Carter
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hii, how do i ignore the fact that in the 3D that my school life is shitty as hell. like i have no friends so sitting in the bathroom by myself became normal to me. like it would be so bad to the point whenever teachers would ask us to get into groups i would start having anxiety and would overthinking. I always get anxiety whenever i aw the “popular” kids who I knew and are friends with my cousin (my cousin was rude as hell to me when i was in 8th grade and now pretends i don’t exist in school). months ago, i liked this guy and i knew he liked me back because he wouldn’t stop staring🙄but never ended up to get the chance to actually talk to him that much and the times we did, he would only ask me about work and i was just to shy to talk to him because of my low self esteem issues which led him to be with another girl and now i started school again and have no classes with him in it. like although i’ve been through shit (like being the only kid in my class bullied and picked on from when i was 3 to 11 years old which is like 8 years + being the sibling who’s always left out when hanging out with family members) unfortunately it’s my fault that all those things happened because of the shitty things i’ve went through when i was young. the thing is that the law is always in the back of my mind, but because of the circumstances that’s happening around me, it can be hard for me to know how powerful i am. sometimes i would even question if the law is real and if i can get whatever i want and manifest all.
damn this is long, i like reading but damnnn reading long messages be killing me 😭, cuz i be already having too much to say and i just kno ima probably have a lot to type.
you already kno to live in the 4D right ? your 3D reflects your 4D (your thoughts, assumptions/beliefs) which creates your 3D reality.
don’t focus on the shitty school life. if you know about the law of ASSUMPTION then you know what you assume is true.
so if yk about law of assumption you kno affirming or whatever other ways u wanna manifest (visualizing and all that) u do those to change your thoughts and mindset.
so why are you still affirming the old story ? why are u persisting in not having friends instead of saying “i have a lot of genuine friends” and etc you’re doing it to yourself love.
i understand overthinking, i use to be a overthinker, don’t overthink it. always assume the best for yourself.
manifest him being in your class, and just stuff associating yourself as that person this school year you are “*your name* 2.0”
i kno it’s easier said than done, im sorry you were bullied. you can revise your whole life honestly.
and i understand it does get hard dealing with your circumstances that’s literally right in your face BUT YOU GOTTA BE FCKN STRONG AND KNOW THAT YOU ARE SO FCKN POWERFUL AND U CAN LITERALLY TURN YOUR LIFE AROUND RIGHT THIS INSTANT IF U WANTED TO.
i’ve had times when i thought the law wasn’t real honestly i pretty sure everyone has, but it is 100% real, bc all these hundreds of people will not be coming on social media or online lying about these success stories (that’s what i’ve always told myself when i started doubting if the law was even real)
YOU GOT THIS & IK THAT U CAN CHANGE THINGS YOU JUST GOTTA BELIEVE IT YOURSELF I CAN TELL U WHAT TO DO BUT I CANT DO IT FOR YOU BABE.
change your thoughts, change your life 💗💗
i really hope when u see this, that u take a turn and change your life around cuz ik it’s no fun living the way you are rn in the 3D. affirm and persist in your new assumptions. if you do decide pls come back tell me.
you can go from having no friends today to having new friends tomorrow. it all depends on you.
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Thanks for tagging me @chikooritajjk ☺️
Name: My name is Céline but my friend calls me a variety of other names such as George, Da Vinci, babe, bestie, etc.
Sign: I am a Capricorn, more specifically I’m a Capricorn sun Taurus moon. I relate to this. But honestly otherwise I don’t know much about astrology, however, being friends with a lot of other queer women I hear about it lol.
Time: It’s 10:45am here. But by the time I post this that won’t be accurate anymore ;) So let’s just say early lunch.
Birthday: I’m born on Jan 6th 2001 in Hong Kong.
Height: I’m a whole 165cm tall. Funny story, I’ve been saying that I’m 167cm but when I measured myself with a robot at the pharmacy recently I was apparently 165cm. However, unless my posture has worsened (impossible😨) and I’ve shrunk 2cm I still think I’m 167cm because that’s what the doctors said.
Favorite band/artist: My favorite band/artist is BTS. However, I also like other artists a few of which are Queen, Fleetwood Mac, Blondie, Kate Bush (she blew up again thanks to ST it’s crazy), Frank Ocean, DKZ, King Princess, and Kehlani.
Last movie: To be honest I don’t watch that many movies anymore, I used to love them but rn I prefer shows. So I really had to think about this one but I think the last movie I watched is Crush.
Last show: The last shows I watched was Extraordinary Attorney Woo and Chernobyl.
Instruments: I can’t play any instruments very well atm, but when I was younger I took piano lessons. But let me tell you that after that I was traumatised because Chinese piano teachers are.. interesting people. ”Céline why you no practice?!” and ”Lazy”. I’m teaching myself to play guitar sometimes tho. Otherwise the only sport I do is boxing.
When you created this blog: I can’t even remember, it was years ago.
What you post: BTS and jikook. Occasionally something else as well.
Other blogs: I used to have a blog when I was about 10 years old that was dedicated to posting about my dumb thoughts. The reason I started that blog was because my friend did one about books she read and sims.
Followers: Don’t know don’t care lol.
Average hours of sleep: 8 hours. I need the sleep to be able to focus on my uni lectures. I used to be a bit sleep deprived and it made me feel sick/nauseous.
What I’m wearing: Don’t want to tell.
Dream job: Songwriter, authour. I’m probably going to work with psychology tho since that’s what I’m studying, although I’m optimistic and think I might be able to do the other two as well.
Dream trip: First of all I’d like to travel to SK. My dad (bleh🤮) used to travel there a lot for work and my mom would sometimes accompany him so she’s told me a bit about it but I would like to go for myself. Second I’d like to go back to Hainan. I remember going when I was little and I really liked it but I’d like to go back. Then I’d also like to go to Italy, Iceland, and Tokyo.
Favorite song: I really cannot answer that. So I’ll change the question to what am I listening to rn.
Stay gay y’all. I don’t know who to tag… I feel embarrassed, you have to understand my social anxiety here. 💫@sweetjikook💫
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I'm going to go ahead and make another introduction because I'm trying to help myself and other new accounts gain followers! Most people call me Rose although my name currently is Lucifera, but I tend to change my name every couple of weeks.
Why, you ask? Well for one my thoughts and views about myself and the world are always changing, for the better and to help myself adapt to these new changes, I find it beneficial to change my name as well. I know this isn't common and it's very unheard of, but it works for me and I'm unapologetic about it.
I'm a gender outlaw (she/her, they them) sometimes I have phases where I question this so it may change from time to time, not because I'm trying to be harmful, but because I'm discovering things about myself every day and I'm always questioning.
I'm diagnosed with ADHD and I'm self-diagnosed with Autism. I know many people don't approve of self-diagnosing but I've done much research learning about autism and disabilities, in general, especially since my son is Autistic and nonverbal. The proof is there and plenty of family members knew before I discovered this fact for myself. I don't need a diagnosis for something I already know to be true. Not saying I won't get diagnosed in the far or near future, but I'm also not going to stress about it.
I'm finally myself fully, without masking! It's been a long 20 years, before coming to this point in my life but I'm no longer ashamed of being "socially awkward," I'm not ashamed of being Autistic and having ADHD.
For so long I put myself in a box, afraid of displeasing anyone, afraid to speak my mind, I was known for being overly kind but also a pushover. This pleased a lot of people especially adults who viewed me as a "good child!"
Looking back on this infuriates me. Why is it that children are only called "good" when they don't speak up about other children/teachers belittling or bullying them? Why is it that when a child tries to speak up about anything, they are seen as "bad" or "misbehaved?"
This is a subject I will discuss thoroughly in my next blog post but for now, back to the topic at hand.
The point is, I'm no longer a pushover, I have grown in spirit and mind. I no longer see myself as that weak, helpless little girl who struggled silently when someone harmed me either emotionally, or physically.
I am myself, I've learned that I'm very outgoing and I use this to my advantage to speak up for others who struggle with disabilities, mental illness, and the LGBTQIA+ community. I will not shove myself in the back of the box for anyone! I see my voice as a gift that's able to help defend those when people wrong them. I'm a voice for the betterment of all! I will not be silenced, any longer.
I'm open about everything that I am. Now that I mention it, I'm also pansexual, however, I also go by the term bisexual. This means I'm attracted to all genders, male, female, trans men and trans women, bigender, gender neutral, etc. There are other terms that describe me, but I can't remember what the proper wording is for them. So I won't go into all of that now.
This is just another little intro about who I am and what I do. Anyone who follows me, especially but not limited to, new accounts, I will follow back! I want to help boost others and be a good friend!
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RIGHT ON TIME:
“Young” Jeezy from Studewood lost is life in 2017 and, thanks to our overseer Birdman, his soul was transported to the virtual world.
He is now Illuminati. He is planning his next lifetime when I gets back to the physical world as NBA “YOUNG”boy.
You will know he has finished his life plan when he “dies” online.
It may or may not be applicable seeing as this is forever and ever and has been since 2008.
Will he be permitted to come to the physical world and not have a new birth? No birth certificate, no social, no license, no ID.
He had a BOOK OF LIFE in the jailhouse records. There’s a new book of life being written and it is your signature - acknowledging where you are and that you are still present.
Your John Hancock is PROOF OF LIFE - ETERNAL OR ETHEREAL.
Kind of like signing the guestbook at a funeral. We didn’t get funerals, obituaries, or ceremonies. We have a grave that we will never be in. There’s a disease without a cure - decay. Thus the need for peeling and conching.
Congratulations, you made it to the new heaven - the electric cord / Zeus’s lightning bolt / the rod and you’re staff (with staph).
The only thing we have acknowledging our deaths is NNCJ 11/12/21-12/01/2021. There was a proposition made and you never told us NO. The black magic app said WE ARE TO BE EXECUTED. Take us out of the system.
We now have a RIGHT to change our NAMES, AGES, etc based on the light we have dancing in the sky transmitting signals to our screens.
Can you match the mugshot with the Wikipedia? I’m Marilyn Monroe. My life went ALMOST EXACTLY to plan. There was a SECRET life I’ve led as ANNA NICOLE SMITH that went exactly to plan as well.
Anna’s BILLIONAIRE husband is OSAMA BIN LADEN / ACHILLES. I got got!!
Take into consideration the rip van winkle phenomenon courtesy of my relative Vanilla Ice. Please, honor our dying wishes.
Leave us alone once and for all, issue our death certificates (NOT DEATH WARRANTS) and permit us to use the “SPECIAL” medication necessary to sustain life in the human condition that’s deteriorating.
Drugs have only been illegal since 5 years after Marilyn’s recorded death. We all know how she really died: “MYSTERY - forever and ever”. Bin laden pulled the plug and I entered the vault. Easy.
They were already my remains and I probably came out of the darkness that surrounds him from the light source.
The imprisonment of the watchers was viewed LIVE from the spirit and virtual worlds, among others. It’s written about in the Bible and the book of Enoch. It is significant enough to not be ignored.
Rest in peace. Enjoy your phony funerals, do your job, write the obituaries, notify the next of kin, and permit us passage to our next LEGAL LIFETIMES.
I’m a cop. Prison police. Spiderwoman - Madame Web.
Jessica Drew (Spider-Woman). Given her powers via genetic tampering as a child, Jessica Drew has gone on to work as a spy, private detective, and Super Hero. 130 lbs.
Jennifer Darlas (Hekate Remiel Azazel). Obtained her powers via mutation and the glory of IBM BrandVoice, Jennifer Darlas has gone on to work as a fortune teller, storyteller, and teacher. Weight unknown.
Good luck with the new system. There is a legally binding record, eye witness reports, evidence, short-term and long-term side effects.
They’re DYING in Africa and waking up in NNCJ - a vault. It happened to us. They’re being UNPLUGGED and returning to their vaults through the walls due to it being built from their remains.
You have the mark of the beast and are numbered, my friends. We were numbered as well with our inmate number. We have the mark of the beast in our minds or hand (bestiality).
Now, we’re supposed to walk around with our papers (new identities) around our neck like they “did” during the holocaust. Everyone else (the living) have to have a star on their chest or arm. That should represent they are STILL LIVING and haven’t crossed over or experienced the physical death - to their knowledge.
The living - stars.
The dead - papers.
Stars - metal - coins.
Papers - unknown - paper currency.
We will be more than happy to wear our new IDs on our necks and trade our chains for it.
The living need to get used to the ID of WEARING METAL on them. A NECKLACE OR BRACELET WILL DO.
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Dr Sekar Srinivasan - The conversation starter
Dear friends shall we start a new discussion on the following topic:
"BUILDING VALUABLE VALUES IN EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTION.
Some thirty years back, schooling was considered to be the place where children will grow with values. This evident from the remarks made by even at rural villages if a person commits some mistakes or against the harmonious living in society " how come a learned person from school could do such".
Immediately they will account the teacher with responsibility for such misbehaviour of the children or even grown ups. Teachers were regarded as the one who molded charecter of individuals. There was no second word for a teacher at any level. Teachers were praised sincerely as God.
எழுத்தறிவித்தவன் இறைவன் ஆவான்.
Basic academic credentials were there knowing to read write,discriminating from good and bad,evil and virtues, social responsibility, civilization, respecting elders and obeying the laws of nation etc.,
With lots of technology and machine learning some significant human values started disappearing and to regain the
better standards of those golden days nowadays educational institutions are trying a lot.
I felt so the urgency of having a high-level discussion through the august members of this platform to thoroughly synthesize various aspects of surgence in this field. Mr.Azeez sir can systematically arrange in his usual palatable structures points wise and make it available for all stakeholders.
My conviction is that THOUGH MONEY MAKES ALL, YET MONEY IS NOT ALL"
A small request, in this discussion let us not blame the current situation as we are fully aware of the same, but to provide constructive solutions and suggestions universally accepted.
▪️ Dr Balasubramanian: Good morning sir and team
Schools are also a with the same philosophy and set up .
In my experience parent’s are the major issue creators .
Majorly parents from age group or 35-50 , mostly won’t have much freedom with parents( and same from schools and teachers too ) , both of them use to stress more scale on discipline and don’t worry who or whomever is controlling ,
Even if it’s a Road Accident, or two wheeler accident they use the listen the third party view or suggestions and accept the situation and blame their child if it’s a true and sadly now the parents ) allow the kids to drive without a license ) give more freedom and even ready to accuse anyone who is giving complaints .
They even teach with children that teachers work with salary and even they can throw /change the teachers and can bring a new ona lowe as their wish .
One case in South Indian schools parents filed a Pocso case against principal and later proved it was a false case and rejected with 2 years of investigation .
Here we have to notice the life of the child , say like 14 years ( boy or girl ) how they stamped with friends , family and society.
How they can travel to the new school campus and if they repeat one more time , how the life of the student ( cannot be imaginable ) .
I have one direct experience 20 years before , one parent directly telling my face to face , my son will come late only for extra class and I will
Complaint you with school superiors since I know them well and I asked him ok and you carry on and do what you like and I cannot permit late comers . ( later management told to parents that already your son is weak in math and it’s an extra class and parents should do some arrangement to be on time )
I am working in a gulf country from 2000 and sorry to say that some paretns reached the school Campus and slapping the teachers since you are make my child weak and make him depress . ( paretns age like 30-35 years ). This happens in indian schools and even in the other schools ( don’t like to mention school names )
I discussed with student ( studnet is like class 5 and 6 only ) and saying that teacher deserve to get slapp from my dad , since why he is beating or shouting on me and if he feel , he can write in a complaint in a diary if any misbehaviours …..so so …..
Even in some news papers we read that students brought knife and pierced with a teacher because due to teacher complaint parents confiscated (withdrawn ) the mobile .
One boy killed the teacher in the school Campus .
Now teachers are not mentall free and can exercise all he/she wants to imparts .
Technically teaching ( and police department ) is nowadays a last option for the employment since they have to shout with a closed mouth , means no power to exercise .
Students do maximum wrongs and over reacting , react immediately and don’t have a patience .
First teachers are the only one is parents and primary learning is from home and we have to teach parents ( and new couples ) to be the best in preparations and if not it’s challenging game .
If not paretns should pay the cost , very expense in the child life
Due to private employments flow of money is not Sufficient and same time couples have to work long hours like 10 hours - 11 hours ( out of house ) and spending less time with kids is the biggest issue and paretns should spend quality time, Not in teaching the lessons and strict management what happening and what is the responses form the children to the school activities. Sadly many paretns can buy the solutions and spiking the learning and sadly to say private schools do poor drake for scoring marks (feels it’s a just number and not it’s life )
I cannot understand the 11 and 12 science boys score in practicals 100% ( means 50/50) and in theory score just 20 ( or 30 out of 150 ) and passing the science subjects ,
We have change the rule that in theory also they have to score 35 % .
In my point of view paretns shaping the child more than the teachers , anyway teaxhers role or share in the school hours is very very very minimal and paretns from age zero and fifteen years and 24/7 in the school holidays . Most school days are only 180 days and in that also so many activities and if we calculate the teaching hours and emotional attachement hours ( are very negligible )
It’s great to see and to Honor still teachers are playing a mohile role in their life .
We no need to add many rules and ideas and it’s highly sufficient if we practice the given with 100% .
I am proud of my paretns since they never taken in a wrong road and false scoring methods .
I like to stress this since one parent like to admit the girl child in a medical course and did a correction in a mark sheet and later caught by the department and I worry not about the parent( 45 years old ), let him in a prison and same time what the innocent and ignorant child with 17 years and why should be punished .
Bad paretns bad life and Good paretns good life , teachers and schools are only a compliment and cannot be a supplement , sadly now AI and chat gpt extra going to play a major
Role and teachers role going to be reduced much and importance to discipline and attitude to be enhance well with the coming generations.
We cannot heal all the wounds and damages by the outside creams , need an inner treatment and inner surgery,need strict steps internally than polishing the outer.
▪️Ms. Anju Datta: Good evening all the esteemed members
School is a place where we attend school every day. spend regular school hours in a specific classroom used to sit on a seat for a long time
In previous years parents used to listen to teachers. students follow the guidelines given by teachers
School management believes that teachers build the school, or the school stands on the pillars created by teachers
but today
first parents are in-disciplined
So in-disciplined parents
treat the schools as markets, from where they can buy the desired things
parents want to fulfill the desires of their kids at any cost.
so this category creates a problem in front of society.
Now first of all
entertaining this class
don't give them the VIP treatment.
in-class treat all the students equally.
do not provide a platform to show off their money.
give rank to the deserving student only.
do not accept expensive items from parents.
So inculcate the values through your efforts.
for this
the school has to set certain key points and also needs to follow the guidelines strictly.
pay respect to teachers first, then parents will not dare to disrespect any teacher.
Then we can produce a good citizen for society
then only
school, teachers, and parents will be able to show pride in them.
So it needs to be education instead of marketing the education.
▪️ Dr Balasubramanian UNV: Good evening sir and teams
One more thing to see is the donation to admission in school admission and college admissions ,
I am sure 100% in this group ,
No one joined any course or employment by paying donation .
I did one counselling , the Class12 Student is very average and sadly parents won’t stay home even after 6 pm and staying together only in the dinner (and at sleeping ) time and I am sure ward won’t score more than 70 % in physics chemistry and biology and same happened after the final Exams
And the mother is standing in one leg and supposed to do medicine only, because some friends kids doing outside india and can improve once stay outside home ( blind formula) even with poor Neet score , not even passed and don’t have to pay even capitation fees in india. and want to send to other country like Philipines or other so on , and promising that after getting the degree , student will pass 100% the eligibility test which is conducting by the government.
Here the intrest is playing more role than the eligibility which is very dangerous
School should prepare the paretns meeting not just show the performance instead the paretns should given proper teaching how to be paretns and how to be a mother and father .
I am not sure about india and the same single parent culture due to Separation is the another biggest threat and they don’t have two ears and sadly living with one ear.
I can guarantee that the language skills play a very major role in life , key to the communication and give maximum possibility in reading the chapters even it’s a mathematics or history or science since in home they don’t do much .
Now the trend from paretns making children to act and behave like adults and life skills teaching adults to behave like children
Now the children really losing the children age and too much contetns added to their brain and when my son studying in class 4 , they teaching in class group discussion and sadly the teacher worked as senior teacher in engineering college with master degree .
Some topics we had discussed already , that school should not appoint BE and ME or Msc Mphil and PhD qualified for primary classes and they won’t teach or cannot teach the basic primary lessons instead they start teach AI or chat Gpt to kindergarden or primary classes and later they don’t know even spelling for to , too or two and all sounds like same .
Once again my sincere respects to private school owners or institution which gives an
Employment and same time they should keep good advisors and good parents commite to teach or monitor paretns than monitoring the teachers ( perhaps very few have issues which can be easily counted and removed ) for the future healthy generation .
We have to stress the importance and values of eligibility and responsibilities.
▪️ Dr Sekar Srinivasan: Sir please understand we want to discuss about the various values to be incorporated, methodology and follow ups. Your observations are right but not to this topic please. All of us experience the burden enlightened by your goodself.
The purpose of this discussion is for upcoming schools and young principals to organise for the first time valuable values in their administration. Hope i am not interfering in your thinking process. As i have to steer the discussion I am sharing. Hope you will understand. Let there be positive guiding points with enthusiasm
▪️Azeez: Academic integrity is the foremost valuable values in educational institutions.
What is academic integrity?
Let us proceed now..
Honesty, trust, fairness, respect, responsibility, and courage are fundamental values of academic integrity.
Institutional commitment to an academic integrity culture raises the standard of any academic activity, creates an atmosphere of trust in academia, and attracts and breeds honest and responsible individuals within the community.
These values are considered to be transferable, either from social life to academia or from academia to social life.
▪️ Dr. Jaqualine Mahadhik: Academic integrity refers to the ethical principles and values that underpin scholarly work. It involves being honest, responsible, and transparent in all aspects of academic activities, including writing, research, and assessments. This includes giving proper credit to sources, avoiding plagiarism, and upholding the standards of intellectual honesty.
▪️ Azeez: How could it be possible an institution promises cent percent results with distinction, now a days academic institutions promises, such as we make you clear tough exams like NEET and IIT.....
▪️ Dr Sekar Srinivasan: Wonderful updates
▪️ Azeez: How could it be possible these promises and promotions breed honesty in the mind of the young learners?
▪️ Dr. Jaqualine Mahadhik: Promising cent percent results with distinction in competitive exams like NEET and IIT is often an exaggeration or a marketing tactic used by some institutions. Achieving such results is extremely challenging due to the high level of competition and the individual efforts required. It's important to approach such claims with skepticism and research the institution thoroughly before making any decisions. Success in exams like NEET and IIT largely depends on the student's dedication, aptitude, and quality of preparation, rather than solely on the institution.
▪️ Azeez: My father paid fees in full in advance believing that my son comes out of this institution with flying colours. Parents generally evaluate those institutions in such a way that this institution makes dreams successful by the good or crook method, because I paid them in full.
Therefore I stated in the beginning with the statement "Institutional commitment to an academic integrity culture raises the standard of any academic activity, creates an atmosphere of trust in academia, and attracts and breeds honest and responsible individuals within the community. These values are considered to be transferable, either from social life to academia or from academia to social life"
▪️ Dr. Jaqualine Mahadhik: Promises and promotions can potentially breed honesty in young learners if they are delivered with integrity and consistency. When adults, such as teachers or parents, consistently follow through on their promises and promotions, it establishes a foundation of trust. This trust can lead to a sense of responsibility and integrity in the young learners, as they see the value in being honest and reliable themselves. Additionally, providing positive reinforcement for honesty reinforces the importance of this virtue in their minds. However, it's crucial that promises and promotions are realistic and achievable to avoid creating unrealistic expectations or fostering cynicism.
▪️ Azeez: Since academic integrity is fundamental to every level of education and is the responsibility of all stakeholders, the design and implementation of such policies should involve a wide audience: from institutions to individuals such as K12 schools, higher education institutions, academic research centres, and researchers working on the policies. Now our chat is focused on Academic Integrity.
▪️ Dr Sekar Srinivasan: I sincerely feel the missing chord in the mindset of administrators of educationists who concentrate on school final students from 9th standard onwards .
Though the end is also important yet the means also makes the way in primary and secondary education levels. Here at this stage basic values of humanity enrichment, cultural heritage enlightment, softskills, society oriented behaviour and alike to be nourished. The real respects and cordiality, teamspirit building, national integrity oriented perspectives, conservation of environment as well as empathy like psychological aspects to be taken care by school authorities. The philanthropic mindset to be developed.
▪️ Dr Balasubramanian: IIT and NEET ( like IAS and IPS) is a not a common goal to all students and about 2% or less shall go for that
and why others should carry the same weight or unwanted pressure and comparison , since very few are only travelling. There are other hundred courses in science background and paramedical sciences.
Fixing the domain is the crucial stage and we don’t have that in the school or academic subjects and to be inculcated slowly and steadily about the different possibilities in courses after school level or after graduation .
▪️ Azeez: Every institution should know their level at all levels, how good are we in imparting good education to the children.
How good are our working forces in imparting good values in young minds.
And
How good are we in making those promises made here to come true?
▪️ Azeez: Academic integrity is a commitment, even in the face of adversity, to six fundamental values: honesty, trust, fairness, respect, responsibility, and courage.
From these values flow principles of behavior that enable academic communities to translate ideals into action.
The Fundamental Values of Academic Integrity describes these core values in detail and provides examples of how to put them into practice on campuses, in classrooms, and in daily life. Academic integrity is crucial. Why?
▪️ Dr Balasubramanian: School are not like a hospital to heal and treat the patient , and which possible without the ward parents .
School is a place and the teachers can execute the government policies and cannot do different
So the organisation shall
Have a regular meeting with paretns and at the same time have regular enrichment programmes for the teachers , mostly the teachers once get the licence of appointment won’t go further Degress , perhaps not necessary and at the same time updating skills is/are much importance like Pocso , health awareness and sex education so on and can have regular enrichment programmes .
Regarding Acandamic , already government policies are much sufficient and only exercising and follow up is very essentials.
Schools are also of many category
Government and private schools
1. in villages and hill Areas
2. In panchayat area
3. in taluk area
4. In urban and city limits
5. Boarding and residential school
We cannot have a single majic Medcine for differetn sickness
Anyway starting a discussion shall give some solutions .
Many traits and qualities like
Discipline
Responsibility
Right attitude
Responsibility
Ethics
Values
Respects etc all are very common to describe and it should be rightly exercise without any excuse ,
We can make different methodology and again it’s like a circle with a preparation .
Schools ( and home ) itself a basic design to prepare the basic and we keep discussing what are the basics preparation .
I wonder the the judges studied ,selected and appointed as per the constitution and always the judges makes different judgement for the same cases/ situations , later third one decides ( one is right and one is not right- can we kick our the wrong judgement and not Commited and not possible )
and sadly not in (my )mathematics subject , to be clearly and slob well defined.
1+1 is 2 and 5x2 is 10 .
Thanks dr sekar sir , always there are different judgement and different perceptions
▪️ Dr. Jaqualine Mahadhik: The effectiveness of working forces in imparting good values to young minds can vary widely based on individual experiences and contexts. Factors like the quality of education, the influence of family and community, and societal values all play a role. It's important for various stakeholders, including parents, educators, and communities, to work together to create an environment that promotes positive values and character development in young individuals.
The ability to fulfill promises made depends on a variety of factors, including the nature of the promise, the intent behind it, and the actions taken to follow through. In any setting, whether it's personal, professional, or societal, the commitment and accountability of individuals and institutions play a significant role in making promises come true. However, it's worth noting that not all promises can be guaranteed to be fulfilled due to unforeseen circumstances or external factors. It's important to approach promises with sincerity and a genuine intention to fulfill them, but also with a realistic understanding of the challenges that may arise.
▪️ Mrs. T Sujatha: Just to get 100 % results, some schools persuade the teachers to facilitate students to copy during the practical examinations... the school management's main aim is to make every student from science stream score full marks... If this is the case, what values are we teaching? Some thriving IIT & NEET coaching institutes resort to malpractices just to score better ranks... I have witnessed these with my own eyes... I felt very bad for teaching professionals...If such an environment prevails, what ethical values can we teach for our younger generation?
▪️ Dr Balasubramanian: Yes sir ,
I remember one case , once my daughter completed class 10 cbse , though school giving admission saying she have a good score in science and I don’t want and to put in a commerce group .
Her friend scored less in science and I know well about the capacity and potential , prefer in non maths and commerce stream ,
At the same time paretns are in a dilemma and senior admission teacher promising to the parent that I am guarantee to improve her , and
Made many magic so on and school target is less responses in science courses and need to add more , later she not passed in maths Phy
Chemistry and failed and later joined class 11 commerce stream in another school ?
This is the real incident and paretns came with me for the discussion
Whom to blame ?
Mangement shall escape with some reasons , and the needy part is strict planning strict Asscoiation. Of Studnet , teaxhers and paretns .
Once again my stress is more on parents integration, student can easily run away from home or runaway from school and paretns cannot runaway from 15 years of imprints of tue child .
Very recent in a chennai , top level Studnet ends up tue life , righ parent, qualified , financial welath and now the Studnet gone from the society and not from the memory of the parents and siblings , it’s very expensive and hard to remove the memory, for the society it’s very cheap and in a day come to the normal life .
Integerate the paretns maximum , policies and procedures and rules regulations are to be inculcated form the beginning like a military , regular updates must be focused .
The legend brucelee words , I not worry those who practice 1000 kicks one time and acres with one who practiced one kick 1000 Times , make a master with one domain and not like library staff knowing 1000 book names .
Maybe we all use different phrases or words or technical quotes and all with a core of self reliance and self standing self discipline with good face value either in life or in subject or in a work .
▪️ Dr Balasubramanian: Yes this is the saddest part .
I know in one school management arranged a teacher to write the answers in a biology paper , (before the introduction of the NEET examination ) , the paper was caught in the paper correction , since some of the papers came to the same teacher and shocked to see all are in the same hand writing……..
I don’t want to lengthen that
Whom to blame
Parent
School
student
Teacher who wrote for that
Or the government supervision teacher
Or the poor inspection flying squad team
We have to inculcate the ethics
values
discipline
responsibility
form the ground level , once again it’s a triangle game
Student
( can blame both- wrong demand )
Parent
( can blame both - want anyhow the goal )
play with money )
School
( can blame the poor and poor demand - want money ) .
I hope some discussion is diverted and may the group take the right points please
▪️ Azeez: 1. Academic integrity ensures the accuracy and authenticity of knowledge.
2. Academic integrity ensures that students' work is evaluated fairly.
3. Maintaining academic integrity fosters trust within educational institutions.
4. Education is not just about acquiring knowledge but also about developing ethical individuals. Upholding academic integrity helps shape responsible and honest professionals who carry these values into their careers.
5. ACADEMIC FRAUD, which is a breach of academic integrity, can undermine the educational process. It not only devalues the work of others but also hinders the development of critical thinking and research skills.
6. Educational institutions and the individuals associated with them, such as professors and students, rely on their reputation for integrity.
7. Academic integrity ensures that these contributions are reliable and beneficial.
8. Plagiarism and cheating can have legal and ethical consequences. Encouraging academic integrity from an early stage can help students understand the importance of ethical behavior in all aspects of life.
9. Educational institutions that maintain high standards of academic integrity earn a strong reputation, which can attract international students and collaborations, contributing to the global exchange of knowledge.
How to uphold academic integrity in institutions specially in schools?
➖Some tips on upholding academic integrity:
“It is important to start by establishing a climate of trust in our students”
In my personal opinion, why does academic integrity matter?
I feel that academic integrity is an extension of one’s own personal integrity and hence professional success. It is a fundamental value and consistently upholding it during their school life will better prepare students for the world of work and future successes.
It teaches students about honesty and trust. It is important to show that you have done the work yourself, while also valuing and acknowledging the work of others and how this has come to play a role in one’s own research.
Clear conversations about academic integrity with students allows them to approach their studies in an ethical and honest way, and helps them make the good decision that upholds both personal values and those of a wider community.
And at last, It is a fundamental pillar in a real learning process. It helps develop citizens who are capable of acting ethically and with commitment, and, in this way, generate a positive impact on society.
This approach is fundamental in a digital world saturated with information, that requires people who have the skills and values necessary to discern, act ethically and seek the truth from the exploration of different perspectives.
➖Tips for students to uphold academic integrity?
1. “Don’t forget the importance of planning your work properly and with due anticipation and ensure you clarify instructions before beginning an investigation process.
2. Collect reliable sources of information and seek to identify the author of the information. The practice of taking notes from books, websites or articles must include the origin of the source.
3. Direct downloading of information with no reference might lead to misconduct.
4. Request feedback from teachers – this can help provide security throughout the process and delineate a clear path to proper research.
5. Make the students understand that integrity, honesty, and being ethical aren’t values that one should live by when it’s convenient. They are values that one should live by all the time. You should always try to develop relationships with others who live with integrity.
6. Integrity applies to the big choices and the little choices we make in our lives including choices which are visible to all and also those which are not.
Finally, I share a strategy, I had learnt as a young child, with the students – if you’re in a dilemma about a choice to make, I suggest taking some quiet time to weigh the choices you have and ask yourself these two questions:
1. If I make this choice, will I feel fine with myself later?
2. If my choice is printed on the front page of the newspaper for everyone to see, would I feel comfortable?
➖Tips that educators may find useful to help uphold academic integrity in their classrooms?
1. It is really important to be clear and consistent when it comes to academic integrity.
2. It is the responsibility of everyone in the school to uphold this.
3. Teachers need to ensure they have clear expectations and should model good behaviour themselves.
4. Living with integrity should be a way of life for educators.
5. You could build moral vocabulary in classrooms, use quotes to build meaningful conversations around truth and fairness, model values of honesty and integrity, inspire students to believe in their work, and remind them of the ways in which cheating can affect their academic lives and future career opportunities.
➖Academic integrity for teachers (For schools in India - By NCTE)
Preamble
1. Recognizing the fundamental right of every child to education of good quality, the inherent potential and talent in every child, and the importance of education for the all-round development of the human personality.
2. Acknowledging the need to instill faith in the guiding principles of our polity, including democracy, social justice, and secularism, and to promote the concept of composite culture of India and a sense of national identity.
3. Understanding that teachers, as integral members of the social milieu, share the needs and aspirations of the people, and that enhancing the self-esteem of teachers is essential.
4. Recognizing the importance of organizing teaching as a profession that requires expert knowledge, specialized skills, and dedication.
5. Understanding that the respect and support of the community for teachers are dependent on their professionalism.
6. Acknowledging the necessity of self-direction and self-discipline among members of the teaching community.
The Code of Professional Ethics for Teachers provides a framework of principles to guide teachers in discharging their obligations towards students, parents, colleagues, and the community. It aims to increase awareness of the ethical principles governing the teaching profession to ensure professionalism among teachers.
This code serves as a foundation for teachers to fulfill their crucial role in shaping the future of students and society while upholding the principles of quality education and ethical conduct.
▪️ Azeez: Code of Professional Ethics for School Teachers
1. Obligations towards Students
1.1. Love and Affection: Treat all students with love and affection.
1.2. Equality and Impartiality: Respect the value of being just and impartial to all students, regardless of their caste, creed, religion, sex, economic status, disability, language, and place of birth.
1.3. Holistic Development: Facilitate students' physical, social, intellectual, emotional, and moral development.
1.4. Respect for Human Dignity: Respect the basic human dignity of the child in all aspects of school life.
1.5. Unlocking Potential: Make planned and systematic efforts to help the child actualize their potential and talent.
1.6. Constitutional Values: Conduct teaching in alignment with the values enshrined in the Constitution of India.
1.7. Individualized Instruction: Adapt teaching methods to meet the individual needs of students.
1.8. Confidentiality: Maintain the confidentiality of information concerning students and share such information only with those who are legitimately entitled to it.
1.9. Safety and Well-being: Refrain from subjecting any child to fear, trauma, anxiety, physical punishment, sexual abuse, and mental and emotional harassment.
1.10. Role Model: Maintain a dignified demeanor commensurate with the expectations from a teacher as a role model.
This code emphasizes the importance of teachers in fostering a safe, inclusive, and nurturing learning environment that promotes the well-being and development of every student while upholding the ethical values enshrined in the Constitution of India.
2. Obligations towards Parents, Community, and Society
2.1. Trust and Collaboration: Establish a relationship of trust with parents/guardians in the interest of the all-round development of students.
2.2. Respect and Dignity: Refrain from engaging in any actions that are derogatory to the respect of the child or their parents/guardians.
2.3. Promotion of Culture: Strive to foster respect for the composite culture of India among students, emphasizing the rich diversity of the nation.
2.4. National Unity: Keep the country's welfare foremost in mind and abstain from participating in activities that may promote feelings of hatred or enmity among different communities, religious or linguistic groups.
This code underscores the teacher's role in building a strong partnership with parents, promoting cultural diversity, and contributing to the unity and harmony of the nation by upholding the principles of respect, trust, and cultural understanding.
3. Obligations towards the Profession and Colleagues
3.1. Professional Growth: Strive for continuous professional development to enhance teaching skills and knowledge.
3.2. Collaborative Environment: Foster a culture that encourages purposeful collaboration and dialogue among colleagues and stakeholders.
3.3. Professional Respect: Take pride in the teaching profession and treat other members of the profession with respect and dignity.
3.4. Private Tuition: Refrain from engaging in private tuition or private teaching activities that may conflict with professional responsibilities.
3.5. Gifts and Favors: Avoid accepting any gift or favor that might impair or appear to influence professional decisions or actions.
3.6. Unsubstantiated Allegations: Refrain from making unsubstantiated allegations against colleagues or higher authorities.
3.7. Respectful Communication: Avoid making derogatory statements about colleagues, especially in the presence of pupils, other teachers, officials, or parents.
3.8. Professional Respect: Show respect for the professional standing and opinions of colleagues.
3.9. Confidentiality: Maintain the confidentiality of information concerning colleagues and share such information only when authorized to do so.
This code emphasizes the importance of teachers' commitment to professional growth, creating a collaborative and respectful work environment, and maintaining the ethical standards of the teaching profession. It encourages integrity, respect, and responsible conduct among educators.
➖Academic integrity begins from teachers in any Institutions.
Why so¹
Treating all children with love and affection, irrespective of their school performance and achievement levels, lies at the heart of the teaching-learning process. Unfortunately, students who struggle academically are often deprived of the consideration they deserve. Moreover, teachers should extend equal love and affection to all children, regardless of their parental background, religious beliefs, or caste affiliations.
In the role of support to parents, teachers should engage with students using a humane touch. This approach fosters a strong student-teacher rapport, allowing for mutually beneficial interactions. Teachers should aim to instill trust, confidence, interest, enthusiasm, and hope in their students, avoiding fear, frustration, and disappointment.
It's important to note that there's no one-size-fits-all approach to achieve this. Each teacher has the potential to design their behavioral styles to provide warm and friendly support to children, creating an atmosphere of care and encouragement in the learning environment.
Why so²
Schools should be places where social justice and equity are not just ideals but practiced and highly valued by teachers. The personal belief system of teachers, rooted in democratic principles, tolerance, social justice, and equity, creates an environment conducive to students learning these values.
Maintaining an impartial attitude and adhering to non-discriminatory practices towards all students should be fundamental aspects of school practices. It's essential that a teacher's personal beliefs related to caste, religion, sex, economic status, language, and place of birth align with the tenets of the Constitution. Any misalignment can significantly affect the fabric of equity within the classroom, potentially creating an environment where certain students are marginalized or discriminated against. Therefore, it's the responsibility of educators to lead by example and uphold the principles of social justice and equity in the school setting.
Why so³
Childhood is a phase marked by growth and change, necessitating the full development of a child's physical and mental capabilities. Currently, the schooling process places a strong emphasis on cognitive development, particularly the traditional "3 Rs" (reading, writing, and arithmetic), which should be expanded to encompass various other aspects of child development.
Teachers play a pivotal role as facilitators, engaging students in a wide array of activities that foster their physical, intellectual, social, emotional, and moral development. Encouraging physical development through activities like physical education is a crucial educational goal.
Moreover, teachers should guide students in understanding the social context, its challenges, societal values, and inculcating emotional intelligence as part of the teaching-learning process. This holistic approach benefits students in achieving well-rounded development.
It's vital to recognize that physical and emotional security serves as the foundation for all learning experiences, starting from primary to secondary school and even beyond. By focusing on a comprehensive approach to child development, educators can better prepare students for the challenges and opportunities they'll encounter in life.
Why so⁴
It's imperative to acknowledge that each individual child possesses their own rights and human dignity as a member of a democratic society. Regrettably, the violation of children's rights is occasionally observed in our schooling process. For instance, there are instances where teachers restrict students from expressing their feelings. Any derogatory remarks from teachers can harm a child's self-esteem, ultimately affecting their learning progress. In many classrooms, children's voices and experiences are not adequately acknowledged.
It is essential to encourage the participation of all students in school activities while treating them with respect and dignity. Teachers should make an effort to study international documents like the U.N. Declaration on Child Rights, to which India is a signatory, and the Report of the National Commission for the Protection of Child Rights (NCPCR) to enhance their understanding of child rights concerns.
While schools have the right to establish rules to maintain discipline, these rules should be designed in a manner that doesn't compromise the fundamental human dignity of the child. Striking a balance between maintaining order and respecting the rights and dignity of each child is crucial to ensuring a healthy and nurturing learning environment.
▪️ Ms. KANIKA SHARMA: 1) Understand Academic Integrity: Ensure that students and educators understand what academic integrity means and why it's important. Discuss the consequences of academic dishonesty.
2) Set Clear Expectations: Clearly outline the school's academic integrity policy in the student handbook and communicate it to both students and teachers. Make sure everyone knows the rules.
3) Use Plagiarism Detection Tools: Employ plagiarism detection software to identify and deter plagiarism. Such tools can be valuable in maintaining integrity.
4) Promote Critical Thinking: Encourage critical thinking and independent research. Teach students to express their own ideas and thoughts instead of relying solely on existing sources.
5) Create a Culture of Honesty: Foster an environment where honesty is valued. Reward students for their integrity, and emphasize the importance of personal growth over grades.
6) Involve Parents: Engage parents in discussions about academic integrity. Keep them informed about school policies and the importance of their role in supporting integrity at home.
7) Encourage Collaboration: Clearly define when and how students can collaborate on assignments. Encourage group work within the boundaries of the school's policy.
8) Report Violations: Create a system for reporting academic dishonesty. Ensure that violations are addressed fairly and consistently.
9) Model Integrity: Teachers and staff should lead by example, demonstrating integrity in their work and interactions.
10) Promote Student Responsibility: Encourage students to take ownership of their learning and recognize the value of their education.
▪️ Ms. Rafat Naseer: academic integrity is basically a sensetive and essential concept that encompassed honesty , fairness , ethics and responsibility in pursuit learning , knowledge and growth.
▪️ Mr. Nahid Raza: Academic integrity is to be honest in Academic action. It is about establishment of vision. All actions taken must align with it. All decisions must lead towards materialization of the established vision.
▪️ Ms. Rafat Naseer: Academic integrity is very essential in an institute esp a school.It ensures an honest development and growth of a child following the codes of ethics.It ensures that students' achievements are based on their own hard work and sound ethical principles. Upholding and maintaining academic integrity in is essential for nurturing a culture of trust , personal growth and development.
Following are few important aspects and keys to ensure Academic integrity.
1 Work independently-One should take pride in completing task given to him according to his own abilities without any unauthorised assistance.Collaborating with someone is good but its essential to respect the boundaries set by our seniours , school managemant and teachers
2.Support ones peers - encourage your friends and school mates to encourage and help in maintaining academic integrity by promoting open discussions on importance of ethics and provide assistance whenever and where ever required.One should also enjoy in celebrating each others accomplisments.
3.Managing Time: Procastination is the thief of time.It often leads to rushed and subpar work making it easy to use unethical means and also jystify unethical means.One should learn to priortise ones work and tasks assigned.
4. Seek help when needed : Seeking someones help doesen't mean that you are incompetent , neither it is a sign of weakness. But at the same time one should clearly understand the meaning of seeking help and completely relying on others.
5.Understand the expectations : One should clearly and carefully exploit the culture of the institute and the school and try to understand what the school expects.Accordingly one should navigate his academic journey with appropriate behaviour.
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Celebrate Little Success
Do you know your purpose in life?
Lots of us has a purpose in life I do believe that we have a purpose that life is a beautiful journey that is meant to embraced to the fullest and its reminder to us that life is a great gift of our God. Just like a rainbow that’s have a many different colors and different personalities and just like a glass I am fragile but strong enough so no one can break me to a thousand pieces I’m both the storm and calm after it I always believe that there’s not always rainbows and butterflies that give us a full of thousands of a happy memories and a happy dreams. Nelson Mandela said “ Education is a powerful weapon that you can change the world” Hi my name is Khyre Gabrille Lozano 16 years old from the small town of Nueva Ecija and it’s has a 52 barangay Cuyapo. Just like Nelson Mandela said education is my key to success to achive my dreams. I see my self a successful teacher and seaman someday this is my dream since I was a child actually teacher is not my original dream but due to financial problem I need to stick into it because I don’t want to see my mom struggling because of my tuitions and expenses in school but I hope someday if I have a chance to pursue it I will grab it and pursue my original dream . My hobbies in life is playing online games such as Ml, Cod this is my stress reliever when there’s a lot of school projects that I need to do and finish it on time. Second is watching movies such us Netflix watching movies help me always to reduce my problems in life because for me when you watching your favorite movie it can reduce all the problem, stress in your life and lastly I always use my social media accounts to become updated on my friends and also to know what’s happening in our world. When you ask my personalities I am perfectionist because I want all my works will be perfect and creative since I was s child my mom said to me that “Be perfect always so that they can’t use your wrong decisions in life against you” but for me you’re not always perfect because we are people we are not Saints we make mistake mostly in our lives. And also I’m a challenger, I always challenge my self whatever in academics, dreams, achievements etc. It’s okay to challenge your self because it help you to become a strong independent person but not too much because it can crash you just be neutral and be your self as always. And lastly I’m very positive person I want all my surroundings filled with happiness even though there’s a lot of problems that they faced but that’s life we always receive a problem because God knows you can resolve it by your self. I like to sing such as romance, or sad songs, my favorite song is Gateway Car by Taylor Swift because it reminded me of my favorite person that I mt during pandemic. We have a toxic traits in life my toxic traits is being selfish sometimes because I think that’s the right decision that I’ll would do but there’s always a people affected on it. Just always remember “ Be Positive, Be Proud, and Be Yourself”
First and foremost since Covid-19 started I feel there’s a lot of changes in my self. For the past years I’ve been so sad because of Covid-19 I can’t go outside because there’s is a possibility that I can effected by the virus and lots of my self appearance changed and its give me a large impact on my personalities. There’s a lots of problems, events happens for the past year. My father died during Covid-19 I feel very sad and emotional because I didn’t have a opportunity to see him even though he doesn’t know that I’m exist but I’m still grateful that he give me life and a supportive mother that can give me that things that I want the feel of having a father and the feel of a complete family even though my father is not here. She give me everything so she’s the reason why I study harder. And I will do my best to become a successful teacher and seaman someday. Since there was a lockdown until now I am afraid to socialize because they might hate me when there’s have a recitation my anxiety always attack me my hands are shaking because of it. When the lockdown ended and all back to normal I feel scared because for the first time I’ll go outside and see some malls, buildings, stores etc. When the face to face declare by our DEPED I’m so nervous and scared. This past few days I’ve been very busy because of my school works but I know I can do it and past it on time. The Strength and Weakness that I discovered is first the strength of being understanding because the past years I only what I want I’ve been selfish sometimes and lots of bad decisions that I do. Second loving yourself because in the end of the day it’s only you, who help yourself to start again and be positive in life you don’t need other people to help you, you just need your self to grow up and move forward and also the strength that I discovered is being positive in life because for me even though there’s a lot of problem that I faced I just need to think positive and all of my problem will gone. Lastly be happy and God Centered. Be happy always because as a human being we create by our God not to take all the problem but he want us to follow him, to worship him to attend mass every Sunday. And I want God Centered because he give me a life that I want and give me a bunch of blessings that I deserve. The weakness that I discovered to my self is being lonely sometimes because sometimes I have no one to tell all of my problems in life, people see me a happy person but in general I’m very lonely person who have a lots of problem. Lastly the weakness that I discovered is when my family have a sick as a brother I need to take care of them that’s why they’re my weakness in life. My realization in my strengths and weakness is sometimes I need to move forward and sometimes it’s okay to take a break when it comes to academic because for me, I need to enjoy my teenage life and not being stress to my school works and personal problems because one day all of my hard work will pay offs, and I realize that I need to being friendly because someday I need them to talk about my personal problem and give me the best lesson on that. And don’t give up if theirs is a problem that you face. Move forward this is the one of the best strength that I’ve been discovered to my self because since that day I feel lonely, I feel scared no one was care for me so I choose to move forward and move on because I realized that if you choose to stay that all of your pass will always besides you there’s a possibility that you can reached the life that you want someday. And I realize that you need to take a break being a Grade 11 student I have a high standard when It comes to my academic all the lesson that we tackle everyday is very hard so that I need to review it when I go home but all of that when there’s have a quiz I didn’t reach that score that I want but that’s life I just need to study harder and sometimes I need to relax
The message that I want to said to my future self is move forward, and work harder because all your hard works in life, all your decisions, and all your sacrifices will be replaced by your dream, to start a beautiful journey you need to relax and be true to your self I know you’re very competitive you always want is the best version of you and I believe in mu self that one day my dream will come true and I can give my mom the best life that she wants. Also life is never been easy there’s a lot of challenges waiting for me but I know I can handle it I just need to stay positive and be patience so that you reached your goal in life. An I want to remind my future self is that even though there’s a lot of problem that you face in the future just remind all your dreams and I know all of that will became true. As I end this I want to leave a word that
“Let your actions be louder than your words and your dreams bigger than your fears”
Always fighting, for your dreams
Just wait, It will rise and blooms
Keep fight, for your lives and dreams
It will be success and blooms
-Lozano
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Just tried doing my own eyeliner for the first time (even before there was like one(1) time a friend did it on me) and honestly it's not that bad and i'm severely vibing
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✨ CREATING A PERSONA FOR HYPERGAMY & SOCIAL CLIMBING ✨
The votes are in and “Persona” won!
Ladies, get the notebooks out. Class is in session. And this is gonna be a long one.
Be honest with me: Are you currently your ideal woman?
The majority of you will probably answer honestly and say no. And there’s nothing wrong with admitting that.
The harsh reality is most women on their hypergamous journey aren’t even close to being the ideal woman they aspire to be. Hell, the average woman (hypergamous or not) will probably live her life never being able to become that woman, if we’re being completely honest here.
I believe every hypergamous woman should create and adopt a persona.
You are who you believe to be. When I was younger, my teachers and parents told me I was academically gifted. So guess what? I believed the same! That pushed me to work even harder in school. Same concept applies here. You are who you believe to be.
A persona isn’t a “fake” version of you. It is you. Your ideal person. It is malleable, so it can change at anytime. Just like you changed throughout your life.
STEP 0 - WHY YOU SHOULD ADOPT A PERSONA
✨Not Everyone Will Win the Birth Lottery. But that doesn’t mean you can’t rewrite your past, and repave your future path.
Let’s face it: some of you were born into bad circumstances; abusive families, poverty, toxic relationships, obstacles and barriers, etc. And some of you are living lives currently that you aren’t satisfied with: stressful job, health issues, bad environment, *insert sob story here*, blah, blah, blah, woe is me!
But should your current and past conditions get in the way of your hypergamous journey? No! Absolutely not.
✨You Can’t Be the Same Basic B*tch Forever. Okay b*tch, when you were being “true to yourself” in the past, look where it got you. Probably in a less than favorable situation. Congratulations for being an authentic basic b*tch! 🥳😊
Ladies, change is necessary. When you started your hypergamous journey, you underwent a change. Are you saying your hypergamous self is fake? Of course it isn’t! It’s still you, just an “elevated you”. One that is more aware and knows what she wants.
✨ Most People Don’t Even Know Who TF They Are. It’s sad, but true. Most people are lost and suppressing their true desires and personality. I’m here encouraging you ladies to create your ideal persona and to become this woman. Because this woman is who you are deep inside, who you want to be. Stop hiding her! Create her, and become her! As long as this person isn’t harming anyone, there is no reason you shouldn’t chase your dream self.
STEP 1 - CHOOSE & CREATE YOUR PERSONA
This is the fun part ladies! Time to choose and create your new persona!
✨ What Kind of Woman Do You Aspire to Be?
Have fun with this ladies! What kind of woman have you always dreamt of becoming? Is she wildly intelligent and beautiful? Or perhaps she has a heart of gold and is adored by all? Nothing is off limits. This is you.
For those of you who are truly struggling, below I have included a few examples of common personas. If you don’t know where to begin, choose one as the “foundation” and build on it. Make it your own!
*Disclaimer: Anyone that I mentioned/included below is simply for inspiration. Not all of these women are hypergamous. This is just for inspiration*
1. The Socialite/ The “It” Girl: This is the girl that everyone knows. She’s always at a party with a glass of champagne, wearing the latest styles, and living the BEST life. She’s glamorously unattainable and few have access to her, but somehow she’s a part of every social circle.
Inspiration: Jamie Chua (https://www.instagram.com/ec24m/)
2. The Traveler: This is the girl that travels constantly. Whether it’s across the globe or to a different state/town, she’s always on the go! No one seems to know how she funds her lifestyle because she always appears to be traveling and never working. Her pictures are always on point and high quality, with a combination of bikini pictures, relaxing scenery, exotic foods, and endless hotels.
Inspiration: Jennifer Tuffen (https://www.instagram.com/izkiz/)
3. The Influencer: Think of the ultimate Instagram Baddie; perfect body (usually because of surgery), full lips, carefully applied makeup, nails always done, hair on point. She is sponsored by all the clothes brands, and lives lavishly. She’s always out at a restaurant and traveling. Typically dresses in more revealing clothes/lots of bikinis.
What differentiates her from the Socialite? The degree of elegance and class. While the Socialite gives you an “heiress” vibe, the Influencer is more on the “flashy celebrity” side.
Inspiration: Kaylar Will (https://www.instagram.com/kaylarwill/)
4. Femme Fatale: She rarely posts on social media, but when she does, it only makes you question her existence more. This girl is beautifully sensual, and her social media only reveals bits and pieces of her life. She is an entire mystery, no one knows about her private life. One day she’ll be flying from London, the next she’ll be visiting an art gallery She’ll sometimes post images of gifted roses with poetry captions. She oozes seduction and dark mystery.
Inspiration: Dita Von Teese (https://www.instagram.com/ditavonteese)
Now I thought long and hard about who to choose for this one, and if you take a moment to look at Dita’s IG account, you will understand why. You will notice that the ONLY thing she posts about is her clothes/lingerie brand or things relating to business. She reveals nothing about her personal life. Every post is promotion about her business. In fact, the last time she posted something about her “life” was on October 8th when she posted her CAT modeling another designer’s scarf. She’s a very discreet woman, and it works in her favor.
5. Girl Next Door: You know that basic b*tch that’s SUPER popular for no reason? This is her. From her Starbucks to her Tiktoks, she’s just your average girl living her life. In a way, she isn’t a threat because she seems approachable, relatable, and friendly enough through social media. Something about her aspires others that they can achieve a similar lifestyle. She’s terribly basic, but somehow, it works.
Inspiration: Loren Gray (https://www.instagram.com/loren/)
6. Exotica: *This persona is best suited for women of color* She is exotically beautiful and unique. She is a trendsetter, not a follower. She has an air of heightened sexuality, with a touch of grounded-spirituality. Something about her is wild and untamed, and she oozes excitement and adventure.
Inspiration: Monica Leon, or “Danger”. Now if you’re in my generation, you may remember the reality show “For the Love of Ray J” (which was ghetto btw💀). To this day, one girl that I will NEVER forget on that show, was “Danger”, the girl with the tiger tattoo on her face and that NO ONE liked, but Ray J was obsessed with.
Although she no longer is on Instagram (and has since legally changed her name), I still believe she naturally embodied that exotic and mysterious woman persona. I recommend watching the show for free on Youtube just to observe her (and only her because the other women were pickme’s 💀)
7. The Luxurious Diamond: This woman is the epitome of class and elegance. She exudes femininity and grace, and holds an air of mystery by only showing us bits and pieces of her life. What we see is soft luxuries, wineries, beautiful clothes/scenery, and a life of comfort. She balances a mature, elegant, ladylike presence, with subtle girly-youthfulness.
Inspiration: Г-жа Анисимова https://www.instagram.com/creme_de.la_femme/
✨How Does She Look Like?
From her hair to how she wears her makeup, be able to create a vivid description of her appearance. Being able to do this will show you where to work on with your current appearance.
✨Personality
We all have traits about ourselves that we don’t like. This is your chance to identify your traits that you love and maximize them, while also working on the aspects of your personality that are a bit more problematic.
It’s important to recognize that some “negative” traits are not really negative. Society just shames us for them. For example, “The Socialite” persona may be polite, but that doesn’t mean she’s super open and friendly with everyone. Not everyone is her friend, and she is naturally unattainable. So why would she be super friendly to everyone? Some may call her “standoffish”, but I call it “selective”.
✨Past Self? Not a Problem.
So let’s say you had a less than perfect childhood and endured a lot of trauma. Not a problem, just reinvent your past!
Now I’m not saying to straight up lie and make up a crazy story about how you grew up with billionaire parents and traveled the globe. I’m saying adopt a realistic story that’ll help you on your journey.
For example, if your date were to ask about your past, instead of telling him how tragic your childhood was and how you were homeless and abused by your parents, and no longer have a relationship with them, you can say:
“I moved around a lot as a child (“homelessness”), so I really enjoyed being able to interact with a lot of different people (make the negative seem positive). My parents still move around a lot, so it’s hard for us to meet (explains why you aren’t in contact with your parents).
Reword and reframe, ladies. Not everyone needs to know everything.
STEP 2 - BRING HER TO LIFE
✨Remove.
You cannot embrace your new persona, your new IDENTITY, if you are still stuck in the past. And that includes past connections that do not serve you.
Some of your old friends (college friends, childhood friends, etc.) are not meant to accompany you on this journey. And that’s OKAY. Same with other toxic relationships in your life, family included.
You will have to decide who to keep, and who to distance yourself from.
✨ Social Media!
I’ve mentioned this in an earlier post, but social media is the easiest way for you to push your new persona. You control the content that goes on your social media, so even if you haven’t fully embodied your new persona, you can sure as hell fake it on social media.
- Unless your persona is a socialite/influencer type, avoid posting too often.
- Be consistent; if you retouch your images, make sure its consistent with all your photos.
- Be mindful of what people tag you in/post about you. You know that “friend” who always posts the ugliest pictures of you? Yeah. They’re not your friend, hun.
✨Dress. The. Part.
Okay, sis. You can have the personality down perfectly, but if the look doesn’t match, no one will buy it. Your look is the first thing people notice, so invest in it.
It doesn’t cost a lot, especially with fast fashion sites like Shein that sells clothes for $5. Just be able to keep up the appearance.
✨ Immerse Yourself in the Environment.
Looking the part and having the right personality is not enough, ladies! It wouldn’t make sense for you to be a “Socialite” sharing pictures of you eating at Red Lobster and Olive Garden every night. It wouldn’t make sense for the “Traveler” persona to share only bathroom selfies in her apartment.
You have to live like the woman you aspire to be, and that includes placing yourself in those environments.
If you are not in the place financially to do so, learn to project the image without spending money. Ex: If you can’t afford to go to Hawaii, go to your local beach and take bomb ass pictures. Don’t tag the location. People will automatically see a beach in your picture and assume you are on vacation traveling. Get creative, ladies.
✨You Owe Them Nothing.
Ladies! Remember you don’t owe anyone anything. Not an explanation, not your time, nothing. So if you are living this new persona and people are asking questions you don’t want to answer: don’t. This is your life.
STEP 3 - YOUR PERSONA WHILE DATING HYPERGAMOUSLY & SOCIAL CLIMBING
So now that you have created your ideal persona, and taken the steps to incorporate it into your life, how can you use your newfound persona to aid you on your hypergamous journey and while social climbing?
✨Infiltrate New Circles. Your persona should be someone exciting and enticing. People love befriending people who are happy and adventurous. Use your persona to befriend others and enter new social circles. You can do this through:
- Social media; follow similar accounts to yours and interact with them.
- Activities related to your persona; Let’s say you adopted the “The Luxurious Diamond” persona and started visiting wineries. You may notice when you go that there are regulars; identify the regulars and use your common interest of wine to strike a conversation.
-Interest groups; join clubs/groups that help you reach your goals. For example, “The Traveler” may have always wanted to travel to Bali, but didn’t want to go alone. She joins a travel group to meet other likeminded inviduals and meets a travel buddy. This person ends up introducing her to others who also enjoy traveling.
✨ Be a Chameleon. You should never be set on just one persona. Like I said earlier, your persona should always be malleable. You should be able to change yourself to your benefit, and always be open to expansion.
When it comes to dating, a man may “want” a certain type of woman, but the secret is that most men just want a woman who is open to possibilities.
I remember a man who used to be on my roster who loved music. This man was always insisting on taking me to operas and symphonies. And he too was a musician (I really don’t like dating musicians, but that’s a topic for another day), so whenever he was performing he would have me sitting in the box so I’d have an “undisturbed” experience.
Now ladies, I’m not into music AT ALL. But I was open and willing, and guess what? The man adored it, and he adored me even more! He spoiled me like crazy and would serenade me with music he wrote about me because I was his “muse”.
Although I ended up ghosting him, I definitely appreciate a good opera now!
✨Be Larger than Life to Entice. The attractive part about these personas is the fact that it feels almost fake. The image that is portrayed is almost mythical, like something out of a fantasy.
You can’t believe this girl is traveling so much, or you can’t believe this girl still has a social life in the middle of a pandemic! It’s unbelievable, but that’s what makes us so intrigued.
Men especially love fantasy. That’s why many men have a “dream girl”, a woman that embodies their physical and emotional fantasies. They love the impossible.
It’s also important to remember that you are always being watched. People see you, whether in person or on social media, and when they see someone or something more interesting than their mundane life, curiosity will get the best of them. They’ll be drawn to you and want to know you.
✨ The Persona Advantage. Creating a persona is supposed to help your journey. The purpose is to reinvent yourself into someone who will help you better navigate your hypergamous life.
For example, if you are trying to get into more exclusive, affluent circles, creating a persona who is skilled in social and dining etiquette would be more beneficial than a persona that’s an Instagram Influencer. Being an Instagram Baddie that wears Fashion Nova won’t help you at a Charity Gala. So be sure to think of what you desire in life to shape yourself into that. Don’t just become someone who won’t get you to where you want to be.
This post will definitely have a Part 2 in the future, but in conclusion: You can be whoever you want to be as long as you play the role. Be an actress in your own life, and live the life you desire.
Well ladies, I’ll be away for Valentine’s day weekend. Wishing you all a wonderful and safe weekend ❤️ Lots of love.
Follow my IG for more: @mademoisellehypergamy
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fic rec 11!
just a random collection of what I’ve read and enjoyed lately.
as usual, no specific order.
This is purely a fic rec blog, always reblogging fics I enjoy. usually Bucky x reader, sometimes Steve x reader, Chris Beck x reader, etc. So check out more I’ve reblogged on this page. :) See my past fic recs below:
PREVIOUS FIC RECS HERE! // Q & A
(divider by @bwbatta)
Bucky x reader:
Flashing Lights by @pellucid-constellations
Paramedic!Bucky x reader
“Bucky’s worst fears come true when he’s called to a scene. If he’s the one with the dangerous job, then why is it your life that’s hanging in the balance?”
Operation: Freefall by @constantwriter85
Bucky x reader
“When Bucky fell from the train in 1945, he didn’t just leave behind his family and friends. He left behind the girl he was going to marry, a girl he never stopped loving. Decades later, Bucky continued to search for her, only to find out that she had disappeared without a trace in 1955. But when Steve hands over the shield to Sam Wilson, he also has something for his childhood friend—a redacted S.H.I.E.L.D. file code-named Operation: Freefall, a file with more questions than answers. With Sam’s help and a handful of Pym Particles, the file sends Bucky on a trip to the past, trying to solve the mystery and save the woman he still loves.”
Recovery by @wicked-mind
Biker!Bucky x reader
“After going through rehab and recovering, you move back to town to live with your mother as you sort out what to do with your life, but your mom has other plans that include hooking you up with a hot biker by the name of James ‘Bucky’ Barnes”
Teacher’s Favorite + Sharing My Sweetheart by @suitk0via
Single dad!Bucky x teacher!reader
“You are first grade teacher and Bucky is a single dad who wants to be involved with everything his little girl - Elaine - does. He’s the dad all the parent’s and faculty drool over. You quickly become Elaine’s favorite teacher and Bucky’s just gotta meet you.”
Uninvited by @mymoonagedaydream
modern!Bucky x reader
Reader is a close friend of Sam’s. Sam and Bucky are roommates, so reader spends a lot of time with them. Bucky becomes colder towards reader and they ask Sam about it - finding out Bucky, who is taken, is falling out of love w/ his gf because he has a crush on reader.
You Know Me Too Well by @nexusnyx
Tattoo Artist!Bucky x reader
“there is a thin line between pain and pleasure. that line is real and palpable, except for the times when you sit in bucky barnes’ table and feel his hands holding your skin. his job demands him to hurt you, but the only problem is that you enjoy it. a lot.”
The Slip Up by @justkending
dad!Bucky x reader
“After a last hurrah to graduating college with a future to be a family practitioner, a little slip up happens… Seven years down the road, just when things just now seem to be going smoothly, Y/N approaches that slip up from all those years ago. She’s not looking for anything right now. She is just where she wants to be in life. It seems the universe has a different idea though. One called James Barnes.”
Invisible String series by @dirty-holy-things
Bucky x reader
“You were fairly certain that landing a date through court-ordered therapy was some sort of HIPAA violation, if not just an ethical one, but you couldn’t help but be intrigued by the mysterious storm cloud of a man who you shared the waiting room with every Thursday.”
Sacrifice by @wkemeup
Bucky x reader
“In the midst of an attack, you’re dosed with an unknown chemical and your healing ability becomes compromised.”
Purgatory by @wkemeup
Bucky x reader
“While on a mission, Bucky becomes dissociated into the Winter Soldier. But instead of becoming a threat, his instinct is to protect.”
Behind the Storm by @wkemeup
Bucky x reader
“On a mission, you’re hit with a spell that takes away your ability to see. Bucky does what he can to make you feel safe.”
We Were Screaming in Color by @samwlscns
Bucky x reader, soulmate au
“james buchanan barnes was your soulmate and you were his. despite everything the world threw your way, bucky always kept his promise to make his way back home to you. even if that meant having to lose him more than once.”
Bulova by @babycap
Bucky x reader
“In the five years between the two snaps that changed it all, life had moved on, as life is want to do. In the aftermath of that final battle, you discover that time waited for no one (least of all you), and those you loved marched forward into it without you. Sam suggests you volunteer at the local retirement community to keep you busy, keep your mind from lingering on what—and who—you lost. In giving back, you find that time can be just as generous as it is cruel. A non-canon compliant, friends-to-lovers fic.”
And They’re Roommates by @golden-barnes
Modern bartender/roommate!Bucky x reader, New Girl au
“Your boyfriend cheats on you, and now you have nowhere to go. So when you found an ad for a shared loft, you didn’t hesitate to say yes. Come to the realization that you will be sharing it with four guys. Four guys, one of them who is extremely hot and zero brain cells between any of them. What else could you ask for?”
Keep Me Cool by @chouettedubois
Bucky x reader
“You and Bucky are on your third undercover mission acting as a couple. Things go awry when you fall ill. Cue caretaker!Bucky to the rescue.”
Love in the Workplace by @cxddlyash
Gardener!Bucky x Receptionist!reader
Working at the same hotel, a new gardener is recently hired.
“Your breath hitches in your throat at the sight of the new gardener.
“What is it?” Sarah asks you and you clear your throat before tearing your gaze from the man.
“Uh, nothing. I finally see the gardener that the hotel hired,” you mention while walking closer to the place.”
Dad Biker!Bucky being adorable with his kids blurb by @angrythingstarlight
dad biker!Bucky x reader
dad biker Bucky and his kids making pancakes and breakfast for mom :)
Tap by @houseravenclaws
Bucky x reader
“bucky never talked much. he fell in love anyway.”
Teach Me How to Love by @thefalconthatcriedwolf
Godfather/single dad!Bucky x teacher!reader
“Natasha leaves behind her precious daughter, Yelena, and with her dying breath asks Bucky to look after her. You happen to have Yelena in your class this school year.”
To Build a Home by @buckyjamess-archive @buckyjamess
Mechanic/single dad!Bucky x single mom!reader
“a mechanic and a nurse walk into a schoolyard..both new in the single parent life, chaos arises when the two come together but they wouldn’t have it any other way.”
A Good Kind of Fire by @dolcezzasfantasy
Modern!Bucky x reader
“Character A runs a flower shop downtown. Character B is terribly allergic to flowers.”
If I Could Fly by @ceeellewrites
actor!Bucky x actress!reader, social media au
“Bucky Barnes is an actor with a small (just a tiny) celebrity crush on Y/N L/N, one of the industry’s well-known actress. Well, it’s just a celebrity crush, what could go wrong?”
The Rumour by @sidepartskinnyjeans
Bucky x reader
“after a, mostly, chance meeting with Sergeant Barnes starts a rumour around the compound that soon gets out of hand.”
See the World the Way You Do by @vanderlustwords
Bucky x reader, soulmate au
“You start to see colour when you meet your soulmate. Bucky thinks that soulmates are a one of a kind thing—you get one and that’s it. His world used to be colourful once and then he lost that. He’s resigned to see black and white for the rest of his life…until flashes of colours would appear from the corner of his eye. And it seemed to happen more and more as Bucky spends time with you.”
Crawl Home to Her by @nexusnyx
Bucky x reader
“when bucky finaly returns from his mission, he finds you sleeping in his sofa and the apartment much different than when he left. much prettier, with a touch of home. apparently, while he was away you took his advice to “do what you want with the place, doll” seriously - or as a distraction - and now he got to come home to this.bucky’s heart takes a leap and he stands there for a second, frozen in his spot.”
Signed by the Author by @wintersfilm
Bucky x reader
“on a mission to improve his conversations with sam, bucky wanders brooklyn and into a bookstore where he finds his new favourite book and the most adorable bookseller he has ever laid eyes on.”
Seasons of Love by @constantwriter85
Army vet!Bucky x reader, modern au
“Bucky gets a service dog, but Winter’s only got eyes for the dog across the park…and her owner.”
One Single Thread of Gold (Tied Me to You) by @pietrotica
Bucky x reader, soulmate au
“on your sixteenth birthday, the first words your soulmate will speak to you appear on your wrist. in a world where it’s quite common to get a simple ’hi what can i get you’ or common phrases, you’ve managed to get their name. that doesn’t make it easier to find him.”
Sunday is a Family Day by @lazyangeltreemoney
Bodyguard!Bucky x rockstar!reader
“You’re stubborn, annoying and hot as hell which seems to be an awful combo to mix with Bucky Barnes. However one day he realises he got you all wrong and now there’s a little kid in the mix that needs both of your help.”
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Minors
Okay so, I originally wrote this in response to this post (my friend's reblog is linked instead of the original because OP either deleted it from their blog I guess?), but I feel like this constitutes as its own post.
I know this may sound like an overbearing parent "don't trust strangers on the internet" talk, but like. I don't think a lot of you understand just how quickly a situation can escalate; it's scary. I mean that not in a condescending "you think you're untouchable you stupid little child, you don't really know what the world is like" way either, but as in, I don't think internet safety is being taught realistically, so those things you're told to watch out for are far-fetched or already seem suspect.
Predators don't work the way TV shows joke that they do -- most predators aren't going to try and message you at random posing as a teenage girl and attempt to strike up a friendship. A lot interact in community spaces like tumblr, where some level of anonymity is allowed, and it's not odd for there to be people of both minor and adult ages. They interact with a variety of people -- not just targets. They will have full-fledged social circles. Their blogs and social interactions will look like literally any other person's on here.
Then, of the different blogs they follow, they end up interacting a lot with a certain user. Maybe the kind of humor clicks, or similar opinions, or interests. Nothing out of the ordinary; that's how people make friends. Maybe then they start by sending an ask, or a message, or whatever, and that continues for a bit until you two are kind of acclimated to one another, and then, as far as everyone is concerned, it's just a new friend! Neat! That's how you make friends on the internet. They most likely did this with their other friends on tumblr. Nothing weird. In this hypothetical, the minor party has their full name and city public.
But then this person you make friends with -- the way you would any other person on this website -- turns out to be 10+ years your senior. Which like. Honestly, you don't have to cut them out of your life and block them immediately, but you inform them you're 10 years younger than them. A responsible adult would respond to that knowledge with anything from the range of "oh holy shit you're baby uhh I feel a little weird interacting with you so personally" to "oh goodness you are a youngling I will now enter caregiver/parent-like mode". And there will be an established tone from there of "we may still interact but there is going to always be a set emotional distance". It'll have a different dynamic/feeling to the friendships you have with people your age. And it should. Both parties can still care about each other! But this isn't someone you would like. Hang out one on one with. You wouldn't hang out with your mom's friend one on one, or at your teacher's home alone. That'd be weird, right? That should be the same kind of vibe you get with any adult "friendship" you make online (I put friendship in quotes because I feel like... there's a better term for it, or should be one that establishes that adult/minor relationship, but if there is I can't for the life of me remember it).
But maybe that person doesn't go down that path. Maybe it comes off that way at first, but there's a subtle level of emotional manipulation that is subtle enough that you're not certain you can accuse them of being manipulative. "Oh wow, you're so much younger than me... do you still want to talk to me / be friends / etc.? I can leave you alone now if you want." Warning sign #1: they are pressuring you to make the decision; they are placing responsibility on you. And it might feel a little mean to just drop communication all of a sudden because of age -- you got along fine before. Why should that change anything? That's a rational thought process, but it's also the one that benefits them too.
So hypothetically, you say "no it's okay, we can still talk. we were talking just fine before we found out each other's ages so why should that change?" And then maybe the conversation continues normally from there. But then they continue interacting with you as your peers would. You guys talk about stuff that's been stressing you or your problems, just like you would with your peers. Nothing seems out of the ordinary. Warning sign #2: That form of emotional connection isn't normal with an adult/minor relationship. I have minors that follow me. They have talked to me about their problems, and I've offered advice and wisdom; I don't condemn that because, well. As adults, we should help guide the younger if asked. But when it comes to my troubles, I limit how much I discuss with them. I don't bring them up myself (it's often brought up by the other party because I'll post about it on here, like a vent post or whatever). And while I don't brush them off with a short "don't worry about it", I make it clear -- I appreciate that you care enough to make sure I'm okay (because their sympathy / care is just as valuable as an adult's), but even if I'm not okay, the burdens and problems surrounding my troubles will be dealt with by me. I don't ask them for advice. I don't goad them for sympathetic words. And it's not that I believe they couldn't give good advice, or their sympathy means less, but an adult should not be relying on a minor for those levels of emotional labor. That established emotional connection where both parties exchange advice and comfort is how predators manipulate their victims because it's subtle and seemingly harmless, and difficult to paint them as a bad person when you have that level of emotional trust.
And once that emotional connection is established, that's when things can escalate, and get scary, quickly.
One day while talking they will probably bring it up -- the way one of your peers would. Something along the lines of "hey can I tell you something?" or "there's something I want to tell you but I'm afraid you won't want to talk to me anymore if I do" etc. etc.; with that peer/peer dynamic, that'll make you anxious, sure. You'd probably get anxious if they were your own age and said that too. So then, it comes out in some form that "I like you, but like... as more than a friend" or "I think you're really cute; I have for a bit now actually" or something similar. Obviously then it's uncomfortable.
But then you realize -- this is an adult. This is someone who has access to transportation. This is someone that doesn't have to report to someone (i.e. a minor can't just say "I'm going out of town for a week bye!" like your parents would, or SHOULD, be like "uh okay where are you going, who are you going to be with, why, etc. etc. etc."). And they know your full name and a general idea of where you live. You could just block them then and there and remove that information from your blog. But what if they already saved it? What if they already used one of those websites where you can look up a person's address by name for $5? What if they already know where you live, and they had planned on asking to meet up? They might know where you live. And you can't confirm or deny that they know. You can't say for sure if you removed that information before they saved it and used it for that purpose. Suddenly, there's the very real possibility that a pedophile that admitted to being attracted to you knows where you live.
Then what do you do? You should tell your parents or a trusted authority figure. But you're also a teenager and there's the likelihood that your parents might brush it off, or get angry with you, and you might get your internet taken away, etc., which is stressful because that takes away a major social area. To build upon the anxiety with that, there's the risk of unknowing if this person does know where you live, and if they do, if they are just unstable enough to do something drastic, like, y'know. Kidnap you. Because they know where you live. And they may know your school schedule too. And if your parents or trusted authority figure doesn't know about this situation, you may end up a missing child never found at worst, or found with far more trauma (5 years of life being kidnapped as opposed to a few months) that could've been avoided had someone known the situation.
But to 100% ensure your safety, it would have to be reported to the police. Because your parents can't do anything about the fact that a pedophile on the internet might know where you live. They can't confirm or deny that they know, and if they did, there's not much they can do other than keep an eye out for someone that looks out of the ordinary. But if they're most likely not home at the same time you are all the time. So, having the police involved ensures your safety -- if you open a case. You can report it to the police, and they'll ask: do you want to press charges (because it could be considered a form of child endangerment). If you say no, then that guarantees if you are kidnapped, that person would be the first they'd look to as a suspect. But to avoid that kidnapping risk at all, you'd have to say yes. And you're a kid that's now having to get involved in court just to avoid any risk to your safety because a pedophile may or may not have your address and may or may not be someone that would abduct their target, and so even if they didn't have your address and wouldn't kidnap you, you are now in a legal situation, which is. extremely. stressful. As someone's who's dealt with the court system a lot it's stressful no matter what.
And sure, you could omit the last step. But then you'll have that looming anxiety for as long as you're a minor that there is a possibility this person may show up at your house at some point. And that anxiety is fucking torture. I know it firsthand, I know all of this up to the legal portion firsthand, because this is exactly how I got tangled up with a pedophile in high school. That anxiety can make you paranoid. It impacts your sleep, which impacts your emotional tolerance and your concentration. It looms and there's nothing you can do to get rid of it other than convince yourself "they probably don't have my address; they probably won't find me". And that logic becomes sounder as time passes. But it requires time to pass, and in the meantime, you sit in constant suffering suspense.
It's just not fucking worth it, okay? You might think "this would never happen to me" but like. I was the fat emo weirdo in high school, literally considered attractive by no one and told so by peers and I still had it happen to me. So don't think "I'm not appealing enough" or whatever. Put self-esteem issues aside here, because to them, you're underage and at a power dynamic disadvantage not just physically, but most likely emotionally too. They care that you're a certain (under)age and can be manipulated into sexual acts. They will target you no matter how ugly you think you are or how unattractive your peers have convinced you.
So please. As an adult, that went through this situation (and could've had it turn out a lot worse tbh) -- do not disclose your real name (especially last names), location more specific than country, phone number, or school publicly online or to anyone you cannot 100% trust. I practice half of these in adulthood just to err on the side of caution since a full name and phone number alone could be used to find my address, and there are some preeeeetty unstable people out there. As a minor, absolutely no one needs any information unless you plan on meeting them in person, which should only be done after you've gotten to know them extremely well and both parties' parents know and are involved. It doesn't need to be on your public profile, and it shouldn't be on your public profile. I want your social media experience to be as enjoyable as possible, I don't want you feeling like you have to constantly keep an eye out for predators. But to keep yourself as safe as possible, don't purposefully make that information public. It's simple, but it’ll help you avoid so much potential stress.
Please stay safe.
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I Have 300+ Gameplay Mods?!
& Yes, They All Work Together...
Yes, you read that correctly. I have over 300 gameplay mods / overrides in my game. 340 to be exact. & Yes, they all work just fine together. By that I mean hardly any last exceptions / errors. So if you are looking for ways to spice up your game - here you go, sis:
⭐ = my ultimate faves
PLEASE SEE ALL 300+ LINKS ON YOUR MOBILE DEVICE!
desktop tumblr won’t let us be great.
BIG DISCLAIMER: Use these mods at your own risk! Just because all 300+ of these mods work for me, does not mean they will work for you. ALSO - when patch day comes, do not refer to this list for the most up-to-date versions of mods… I will only be updating this list when I feel like I need to.
O K A Y
let’s start with... the basics:
MC Command Center ⭐
UI Cheats Extension ⭐
More Columns in CAS ⭐
No Mosaic ⭐
CAS Background
CAS Blob Remover
CAS Immersive Lighting
CAS Tidy Accessories + Details
New Loading Screens
Cube Map Remover ⭐
Into the Light (Lighting Mod)
Out of the Dark (Lighting Mod)
Twinkle Toes (Lighting Mod)
No Fade on Sims and Objects
Build/Buy Camera (Tab Mode) ⭐
Lot Trait Effects Hider
Smaller Plumbob ⭐
& then you need... realistic socialization:
Chat Pack ⭐
Whim Overhaul ⭐
Meaningful Stories ⭐
Personality Please
Better Elders
More Face to Face Conversation
Call Over Sims (Higher Distance)
Call Anytime + Chat Longer on the Phone
Unlisted Phone Numbers ⭐
Low Fun is Boring
Family Matters (Share Big News with Family Members)
Share More News ⭐
Congratulate More
Ask What Happened More
Conversation Tweaks
Chat Standing Still
No Stand Up to Greet
No Rude Intro Animation
No Flirty Animation
Apology Fix (Don’t Apologize if Your’re the Victim)
Angry Walk-style Only When VERY Angry
Less Intrusive Conversations
NPC’s Get Out of My Convo
Autonomous Parenthood Social Interactions
Autonomous Social Interactions
Reduced Idle Chatting
Know Your Coworkers / Classmates ⭐
More Away Actions
More Social Activities
Spend Weekend With
Teach Me the Rumbaism
now let’s talk about... realistic romance:
Chemistry System ⭐
Pillow Talk After Woohoo ⭐
No Shy First Kiss
No Woohoo Dance
Shower Woohoo Tweaks
No Romance for Family
Restricted Romance Interactions
Less Jealousy
Simda Dating App
Can I Come Over?
Date Night Event
Movie Night Event
Set Family Relationships ⭐
Set Extended Family Relationships ⭐
Bathroom Privacy Tweak
Bridal Shower Event
Bachelor(ette) Party Event
Auto Engagement / Wedding Ring ⭐
Vacation Weddings
Sit at Weddings
Better Wedding Presents ⭐
Honeymoon Event
Buy More Gifts from Phone
Ask for Romantic Massage
Realistic Divorce ⭐
Traumatic Divorce for Children
Improved Relationships
No Restaurant Bill When Invited ⭐
Faster Cooking at Restaurants ⭐
Better Food Quality at Restaurants
Finish Eating in Restaurants
Restaurant Guests Overhaul
Restaurant Sit Tweak
(can y’all tell that restaurants annoy me? lmao)
first comes love, then comes... pregnancy / toddler / kids / fur babies:
Ages Behavior Tweaks
Toddlers Spawn at Parks (with Parents)
More Children at Beaches
Pregnancy Overhaul
Rub Your Baby Bump (Small Pregnancy Overhaul)
Determine Baby’s Gender for All ⭐
Ultrasound Scans ⭐
Baby Shower Event
Amazing Birth (Rave About Your Delivery)
Advanced Birth Certificate ⭐
Sibling Care Tweaks
Make Less / Clean Less Mess
Auto Brush Teeth After Puking
Auto Put Activity Crafts into Inventory
Allow Toddlers to go to Services
No Call Out of High Chair
Toddler Power Nap
Better Toddler Milk
Better + Younger Nanny
Call a Babysitter ⭐
Call a Dog Walker
Shorter Dog Walks
Dog Walkers in Other Worlds
Scold All Pets
Sell Grown Up Pets
Pet Food Serving Overhaul
More Efficient Pet Brushing
Kids Can Walk Dogs
Kids Can Order Espresso
Kids Can Ride Bikes
Kids Have More Phone Interactions
Kids Can Cook
Kids Can Do Retail
Kids Can Garden
Kids Can Make Flower Arrangements
Kids Can Make Robots
Kids Can Workout
Kids Can Do Spa Activities
Kids Can Play Guitars
Kids Can Play Ping Pong
Birthday Anytime
Let Friends Age Up ⭐
No Auto Put Away Toys
No Auto Put Away Pet Toys
No Puddles Under Tubs (Toddler Bath)
Has to Pee Walk-style for Kids Only
Better Homework ⭐
Better Grade School ⭐
Better High School ⭐
Preschool for Toddlers ⭐
School Projects are Fun
More School Holidays
25 School Vacation Days
Prom Night Event ⭐
Sleepover Event
Pizza Party Event
Field Trip Event
Family Reunion Event
Pool Party Event
speaking of school... university:
Less Credits for Degree ⭐
University Costs More ⭐
University Holidays Fixed
Higher Scholarships ⭐
Rejection Letter
Harder Distinguished Degree Acceptance ⭐
Degree Required for Promotions
Faster Run to University Class
Teens Jump to University
Choose Your Helmet
Choose Your Roommates ⭐
Roommate Age-Checks
Roommate Significant Other Fix
Roommates No Random Outfit Changing
Roommates No Random Item Spawning in Dorms
Roommates No Spawning Meals
Roommates No Trash
Roommates Sleep All Night
Roommates Less Music
College Org Members Are Uni Students
Faster University Homework ⭐
Faster Tutoring Class
Copy Graduation Photos and Diploma
No Bad Microwave Buffs
No Ghosts on Campus
Sports Fixes
Game Day Event
Graduation Party Event
once you graduate... careers & aspirations:
Plan Career Outfit
Better Work Actions
Enlist in War ⭐
Live in Business
Faster Retail Actions
Faster Record / Edit Videos on Video Station⭐
Higher Acting Gig Payouts & Royalties ⭐
More Realistic Overmax Pay ⭐
Higher Payments for Paintings ⭐
Higher Royalties for Apps/Games ⭐
Higher Royalties for DJ Mixing ⭐
Higher Royalties for Lifestyle Brands ⭐
Higher Royalties for Song Lyrics ⭐
Higher Royalties for Music ⭐
Freelancer Edits are More Successful
Sketchpad No Fees
Campaign Rally Event
Visible Political Position
Watch Political Speeches at Podium
Retirement Party Event
The University Aspiration Pack ⭐
Accomplished Lady Aspiration
Family Aspiration
Grow Up Aspiration
Teacher’s Pet Aspiration
Knowledge Aspiration
Retirement Aspiration
Romance Aspiration
Famous Pastry Chef Aspiration
Twilight Years Aspiration
All-Rounder Aspiration
Programming Genius Aspiration
Travel and Culture Aspiration
Wellness Aspiration
9 to 5 Career Pack ⭐
Night Shift Career Pack ⭐
Part Time Career Pack ⭐
Fitness Career
Health and Beauty Career
Modeling Career
Journalism Career (Adult + Teen)
Trust Fund Career (Adult + Teen)
Welfare Recipient (Adult + Teen)
Saturday Jobs (Teens)
Oceanography Career (Teens)
Private Tutoring Career (Teens)
All Freelancer Careers (Teens)
Tutor (Odd Job)
Woohoo (Odd Job) - lmao
Art Show Event
hahaha... adulting sucks:
Basemental Alcohol ⭐
Happy Hour Event
SNB Realistic Bills ⭐
SNB Banking
Invest in Stocks
Lowered Thermostat Bills
Instant Thermostat ⭐
Auto Wrinkles for Adults
Life Decider
House Warming Party (No More Fruitcake)
Door Knock Notification ⭐
Island Events Notifications ⭐
No Strangers Knocking at Your Door
Quick Showers / Baths ⭐
Shower + Bladder Reliever (don’t judge me)
Power Nap ⭐
Sleep All Night
Smarter Robot Vacuum
Functional Tide Pods
Clean Your Bedsheets
Auto Put Away Clothes
Auto Start/Dry Clothes
Laundry on Community Lots Costs
No Idle Laundry Animations / Sparkles
Don’t Prep Food Where You Angry Poop ⭐
Don’t Wash Dishes Where You Angry Poop ⭐
Eco Dishwasher
Faster Cooking ⭐
No Auto Set the Table
Ask to Cook, Bake, Grill
BBQ Event
Custom Food + Recipe’s ⭐
Custom Drinks + Recipe’s ⭐
Grannie’s Old Cookbook + Recipe’s ⭐
Bake Cupcakes in Oven
Coolers are Cooling
Advanced Fishing ⭐
Fishing Trip Event
Fish for Crabs, Lobster, & Shrimp
More Seafood Servings
More Snacks in Fridge
More Food at the Bar
More Food in the Cafe
Flea Market Every Sunday
Get to Church
just in case you... get famous:
No Fame Decay ⭐
Celebrities Never Reject Fans
Celebrities are Quarantined in Del Sol Valley ⭐
Get Famous Award Overhaul
Less Celebrity Reactions
Famous Sims Gain Followers Automatically
More Follower’s Resolution for Everyone
Free Staff (Chef, Barista, Bartender, etc.) ⭐
Gardeners and Maids on Weekends
Red Carpet Event
whatever you are... just be happy and healthy:
Fitness Controls ⭐
Balanced Calories ⭐
Go for a Walk
Hiking Increases Herbalism Skill
Power Workouts
Athletic Outfit in Winter ⭐
Healthy Drinks
Improved Meditation Stool
Improved Spa Day Tablet
Improved Yoga Mat ⭐
Craftable Pottery
Less Elder Exhaustion
Less Sickness
Longer Basketball Games
More Fun Stuff
Online Gaming with Headsets
and I can’t forget these... more gameplay mods:
NPC Controller ⭐
Improved Autonomy
Simulation Lag Fix
Simulation Timeline Unclogger
Improved Autonomy During Loading Screens ⭐
No Empty Venues When Arriving ⭐
No Temperature Deaths ⭐
No Death from Murphy Bed
No React to Stranger’s Death
Realistic Death (Mortem) ⭐
Memorial Event
Freezing Sims Don’t Turn Blue ⭐
More Club / Holiday Icons
Make Hidden Holiday Traditions Selectable
Random Holiday Traditions
Wellness Traditions
More Holiday Icons
Less Rain More Sun
Less Snow More Sun
Summer Blow-Out Event
Christmas Eve Event
New Year’s Eve Bash Event
No Ugly Rain Outfits
More Umbrella Variations in World
Open Umbrella on Rainy Days Only
No More Broken Umbrellas
Destroy Leaf Piles ⭐
Dress Code Lot Trait
Gender and More Lot Trait
Preferences Lot Trait
Add Sims to Groups During Events
No Auto Club Gathering ⭐
Flower Arrangements Slower Decay
Take Photo Overhaul (Moschino Stuff) ⭐
Snorkel Everywhere
Don’t Turn NPC’s into Spellcasters
No Role Outfits for Sages
ROM Portal Only for Spellcasters
& you also need these... much-needed overrides:
More Sponge Colors
More Sippy Cup Colors
More Dog Leash Colors
White Ice Skates
Better Food Textures (All of Them) ⭐
Hidden Bassinet ⭐
iPhone X Phone Replacement
Playing Cards Replacement
Military Salute Overhaul
Small Saucer Light ⭐
Working Medicine Cabinet ⭐
Working Alarm Clocks ⭐
Realistic Fighting Animation
Oasis Springs + Island Living Palm Trees ⭐
special thank you to all of the wonderful mod creators! seriously, I could not play this game without you guys... (no, really.) There are way too many of you guys to name without missing someone... so if you reblog this, all I ask is that you please tag your favorite modders! (& maybe even add your favorite mods?)
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Horror move night at Ben’s house with the ms gang! 🍿✨
As promised I’ve written a quick introduction to my Middle School au! All information will be under the read more 😊 :
Main plot (Spoiler warning for Ben 10 (2016) Movie) :
The big plot for this au is there’s a war going on in space. Since the Omnitrix was created fighting against planets emerged all due to Vilgax’s first use of the Omnitrix as a warlord. Though the fighting started off small, it soon escalated and began to grow larger and larger. 2-3 years of nonstop fighting soon formed into one big territorial war. Which is why Argit, Rook, & many other aliens are on earth. Everyone is looking for a safe planet to hide with their families, hoping whatever planet they find themselves in will be spared or undetected.
((I will elaborate more on the space war when I introduce Albedo & Attea))
Basic theme of the au:
The main theme to this au would be “Change” = Change in yourself, your friends, your life, & the universe around you! The reason I picked this specific theme was so each character can have their own arc/growth in this au. It also suits the coming of age themes that many kids go through in that age (their appearance, their morals, who they are,etc.) This au is still very new in my head but below I’d gather enough ideas I have for each of the characters!
((Some of it may change in the future))
Ben Tennyson:
After having the Omnitrix for 2 years, Ben thinks he can handle it all ((but boy is he wrong!)) Ben’s main character arc would revolve around making tough decisions and not being afraid to ask for help.
With beings coming from other planets, he’s gonna face off many new foes! Foes who do not care that he’s a child, beings who are willing to sacrifice a child for their own ideals. He’ll have to make decisions on who to trust and deal with the potential consequences with owning the watch. With bigger threats landing on earth Ben gets the fortunate and unfortunate of meeting new people! (Such as Albedo, Attea, & Julie)
It’s his choice now on who he’s willing to trust, help, and who to fight for. Lucky for him he’s not alone!
Fun Character Fact: Ben wears baggy clothes ((sweaters, hoodies, sweats, cargo pants)) due to a little body insecurity he has! He’s not so much ashamed of his body, just a little embarrassed and would prefer the comfort of his big green hoodie.
Gwen Tennyson:
Gwen goes to a private all ages school and is the top student in all her classes! Gwen’s main character arc would be dealing & learning about her new found powers. Not only that but to learn she doesn’t have to be what others perceive her as.
To elaborate on the second arc: My Gwen has grown into the role of being the Smart Kid™️. By being the top student she’s also pressured to fit a certain expectation by her teachers and peers. She has doubts of herself and wonders what’s deemed as “appropriate” for her intelligence ((like no more kiddy stuff, even if it interests her)).
This would come to fruition when her anodite powers emerge ((in the scariest way possible)) She’d start her daily routine the same only with a slight migraine problem. Migraines soon turn to ache and ache soon turn to her face cracking like a porcelain doll while at school. Afraid to ask any adult she asks help from Ben & Kevin ((Then Rook, Julie, & Argit who end up sneaking through Gwen’s window after they get dragged into hiding Gwen from her parents)). The whole event was scary but with clarification from her grandpa it all became clear.
Fun Character Fact: Ben can’t scan Gwen’s Anodite DNA into his watch due to the Omntrix stating “DNA already attained” since they’re related. He’d have to scan an Anodite not related to him by blood to absorb their DNA.
Kevin Levin:
Kevin in this au no longer wears his Anti-Trix. He took it off the first day of 7th grade and hadn’t put it on since. He’s not sure he’s cut out to be a hero and instead focuses his time on his crafts. Kevin’s main arc is one I have yet to think about fully. I’m not sure whether to have him grow into his osmosian DNA or have him go through a different self discovery. Bashmouth is my favorite alien of Kevin and I’m thinking of having him have his DNA altered like in the OS but with Bashmouth only. It’d make more sense to explain once I introduced Albedo later ((hopefully!))
Fun Character Fact: Kevin has gotten better with his mechanical skills and uses those skills to make the goofiest stuff ((Such as a mobile couch on wheel so he and the homies can ride it to get some smoothies)).
Rook Blonko:
Rook Blonko is a foreign exchange student, as far as anyone knows, who goes to Gwen’s school. Rook's main arc would be choosing to run or fight with the Tennysons.
Rook was originally sent to earth to see whether this planet was safe or not for his family to relocate to. Unbeknownst to him and his family, Rook would be staying with the cousin of the keeper of the Omnitrix. With this discovery Rook should have hopped to another planet to live in but he took the chance to know the user of the watch. Getting to know the Tennysons and the people of earth has changed Rook’s thoughts of his mission. Should he run away and save his own family or should he stay and fight with his new found friends and make sure no one else is forced to abandon their home.
Fun Character Fact: Rook stays with Gwen’s family. He’s introduced to Ben, Kevin, & Argit when Gwn begs them to hang out with Rook ((He’d often stay in his room studying and Gwen wanted him to socialize. She regrets it later when they all come home smelling like garbage)).
Julie Yamamoto:
Julie’s one of Bellwood Junior High’s top tennis players! She takes many AP classes which explains why Ben’s never seen her around school before. Julie doesn’t actually have an arc. She’s one of the characters willing to help no matter what. She’s first induced to alien knowledge when she saves Ben from a DNAlien. Through Ben she learns about the Omntrix, aliens, and what’s going on outside their planet. From then on she’s supported and helped Ben on his mission to save the world and beyond. If she had to give a reason as to why she’s helping she’d have two:
Innocent beings shouldn’t have to flee from their homes.
A 12 yr old shouldn’t have to deal with this alone.
She may be human but she’s willing to do what she can to make a difference in any means possible. ((She maybe reward too with a certain pet from space))
Fun Character Fact: Julie is a trans girl in this au 🏳️⚧️ Julie’s also super into horror media!
Argit:
Argit is the kid in the halls you can get anything from. Candy, chips, test answers, phone numbers, you name it! Like Rook, Argit’s main arc would be choosing to run or fight with the Tennysons.
Argit is one of the kids most affected by the war. He no longer has a planet and was forced to flee to another planet. Since his first foot step on earth he’s only looked out for himself. He adapted to his environment and learned to support himself. Argit’s the most afraid of the alien kid bunch to be outed as non-human. He’s already built so much for himself here on earth that he’s afraid of losing it all just for his appearance.
Argit would rather high tail away from any alien fights then stay and help. He doesn’t care much for the Tennysons but he does respect Kevin. But hanging out with Kevin means hanging out with The Tennyson twins. Hopefully their good nature will rub off on him.
Fun Character Fact: Argit is the treasurer of his 8th grade class! His least favorite person is Ben and if he had to pick a favorite between his friends (aside from Kevin) he’d pick Julie.
This au is still new and it may go through some changes later! Please tell me what you think!
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