#i cant believe that has to be a disclaimer but here we are lmao
Beautiful - 🚫🙅
Babe - 🚫🙅
Bae - 🚫🙅
Oh Smaug, the Cheifest and Greatest of Calamities - 😤👌🔥
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Big Brain Bitches Playlist ❣️
For the lovely @nataliahaslosthershit , thank you for always being so kind and being patient!!!
disclaimers: this is a fem!reader since it is a request, so if there’s any instances where those pronouns or the fact it’s a fem reader is alluded to that’s why!
warnings: Tsukishima, that’s the warning
gif not mine, credit to owner
a/n: thank you for being so patient sweetie!! I really hope you like this and I did my best with the playlist to include a little bit of everything you like!!!
As much as Tsukishima would lowkey HATE the way you always wanna make friends (not really he just likes being a shithead) he also just finds it so cute??? Like he’s like 🙄✋🏼 must you talk to everyone?? But is also like :) shes so friendly and tries so hard to be nice :) how did I find someone like her :) but he keeps that on the lowkey a bit and GOD LET ANYONE BE RUDE TO YOU WHEN HE SEES YOU AS AN ABSOLUTE ANGEL‼️‼️‼️
Tsukishima is also focused on his studies and would appreciate you being focused as well, he would hate to see you over stressed from the importance your parents put on it, and he’d always be doing/saying things to get you to relax as best as he could
“You’ve gone over this 5 times, do you really think you’re that stupid that you have to go over it again?”
“We should take a break, let’s go take a walk to the corner store and find some good snacks. Studying is always more effective if you take breaks like that anyway.”
It is, but he’s more concerned with removing those frown lines from your forehead and warming your hand up with his
Sidenote - definitely the type to blow on your hands while their held in his to warm them up
Regardless, it’d become a habit for you two to always do your studying together since he wants to be sure you’re not overworking yourself.
Idk I can just see him always bringing a second bottle of water with him just in case you need it ??LMAO like y’all would be studying and you’d be like
“I’m a little thirsty, I’m gonna get-“
boom bottle of water on the table for you
PLS he won’t give it to you until you mention you’re thirsty tho, unless he feels like he hasn’t seen you drink enough water
I don’t see him as a big talker while he studies with you unless you’re helping each other out, he just kind of likes your presence while you guys are studying cause it feels like bonding and he just likes spending time with you :)
A bit off topic of study dates but you can’t tell me his love language ISNT quality time and he would never admit it but he’s definitely clingy lowkey LMAO
like he just wants to spend his free time with you even if it’s just being in the same room together but doing different things?? He thinks being able to be your own person while still enjoying each other is important in a relationship
So of course he’ll sit in a room with you and eavesdrop read a book while you gossip with your friends over the phone and then listen to you rant about it after
just like how he appreciates when you ask about his day while you cook dinner together and ask him all kinds of follow up questions, cause you actually care and want to know!!
Ok but ANYWAY back to study dates:
So like I was saying, not a big talker, but I feel like complete silence would freak him out?? This mf always got his headphones so one of you has got to be playing music while you’re studying, but do you know what this means?
This means that a song has definitely come on that he likes and he totally was humming or even quietly singing along to himself, not really thinking about the fact you were there and can definitely hear him, and as soon as he realizes he would just look at you and shut up SO fast LMAO
Like he’d just get wide eyed and breath in and stop singing and just kind of look up at you AND HIS EARS WOULD BE SO RED (he’s an ear blusher for sure) and he’d do that WHITE BOY SMILE THING WHERE HE HAS DEAD EYES AND HIS MOUTHS A THIN LINE but he’d look so shy and embarrassed plssss and he’d just look back down to his textbook and try not to think about it
And you’d just giggle and he could only groan and be like “let’s move on 😐” BUT YOURE DEFINITELY NOT FORGETTING THAT
But study dates?? Yeah they’re important to you two
Tsukishima would also be constantly making sure you’re taking care of yourself outside of studying, like making sure you’re needs are taken care of since you have a tendency to over look them in the favor of others (which I feel like would really drive him crazy cause you’re his baby!!! He can’t stand that thought !!!)
Like if he saw you offer a friend your last snack knowing you hadn’t eaten enough today he’s slapping a snack in your possession so fast like 😐 eat this, now.
ITS A LITTLE AGGRESSIVE IN THE CALMEST WAY but it’s just cause you’re important to him
The bullying??? Yes he’d love that cause he’s just like 😳‼️ you keep up with him and he’d just love the back and forth between you two so much
Queue the eye rolls and lopsided smirk while he’s grabbing your hand and kissing it telling you to shut up
Regarding your stims - he’d definitely take notice and probably do things like always holding your hand to make sure you aren’t hurting yourself too bad!
I know people have mentioned him not being that big on PDA but I feel like he’d take a neutral stance on it, like holding your hand is so innocent and if it helps you not pinch your wrists or picking at your nails of course he’s gonna do it!! It’s his way of showing you he notices and cares 🖤
Regarding your self confidence, he’d definitely still bully you cause cmon 🙄 this is your guys love language and he knows you know it’s harmless, and the last thing he’d want to do is make you feel like he’s coddling you and suffocating you by not being silly with you the way he normally would
If anyone else clowns on you whew please it is over for them
Like let’s say you meet the boys and you and hinata are clowning on each other?? Tsuki is NOT playing games LMAO like he’d definitely be like
😐😐 hinata I KNOW you’re not talking and you’d have to remind him in private that it’s ok he doesn’t care he will bully hinata any chance he gets
Okok real talk Tsukishima would think it’s so fucking cool you know how to speak more than one language!!! Not the type to necessarily be like let me hear it 🤠 but if you do speak another language around him he’s always like 🙂 wow, that was pretty cool
Ok also?? Both of you being introverts?? Tsuki is happy to the MAX
Like he just gets to come home to you and detox in his little home and sit with you on the couch and talk about your days and watch whatever you’re feeling and it’s just so recharging for him and he’s so grateful you’re perfectly ok with that :)
And finally, tell me he wouldn’t bully you for your height but also find it so so adorable 🙄‼️
Ahhhh!! Ok here is the acclaimed playlist I made for you!! I hope you enjoy it❣️
Ok I did my best to include your variety of music tastes in here!! But if there’s anything you’d like me to change please feel free to let me know and I will!!
Ahhhh I hope you like it, enjoy my descriptions below!
1. The Most Beautiful Thing - Bruno Major: ok so yes we’re starting this off with a dash of Tsuki angst, as much as I know he’d deny it he yearns for love. Like the idea of someone being so important they get his attention and devotion and they love him the same is sooo comforting to him! And sometimes he would daydream about it like :) I wonder when I’m gonna meet them, I wonder how, I can’t wait - but the way he would he embarrassed if anyone knew this - and when he DOES meet you it is not what he expected LMAO
2. 80’s makeout session - dacelynn: ￼ OK SO HE MEETS YOU and is just like 👁👄👁 and it’s everything he dreamed of, if he was feeling irrational he might’ve even believed it was love at first sight but there’s one problem, the way Tsuki is be lowkey mad he wants your attention LMAO. Like you would meet and he would just look into your eyes and he feels his heart stop; and you’re so nice when you’re introducing yourself to him and your voice is so sweet and he can’t stop thinking about the way your curly hair is framing your face and he just oop 🤒 he got the love bug bad AND HED BE SO MAD cause like, he tries to only do things for himself! And that’s exactly why love was a daydream cause UGH HOW PATHETIC IS HE. He never tries impress anyone else cause he’s his biggest critic anyway, but suddenly he wants to be noticed by you and impress you and the way that would just irk him, but he cant help it 🤷♂️ sorry bout it Tsuki
3. IFHY (feat. Pharrell) - Tyler, The Creator: more on Tsuki being mad he likes you LMAO - I think what would push him to get over himself and how it’s kind of scary for him how much he likes you would be imagining what could happen if he DOESNT grow up and just let you know. The thought of you with somebody else? Yeah he don’t like that one bit and that’s when he knows he better suck it up and accept he’s got it for you hard
4. Make Me Your Queen - Declan McKenna: OK CALLING TSUKI SIMPS OUT- you’d want him so bad but he’s so bad at showing his interest!! So on your end it’d be soooo much pining and patience and a little bit desperate like PLS I jus wanna be your s/o man 😕 but don’t worry he likes you just as much, he’s just awful at showing that at first LMAO
5. Kiss Like A Woman - Mona: ok but once Tsuki accepts he’s got it bad, I don’t see him as someone who wastes time at. All. Like he’s like ok well she’s fucking great obviously if I like her cause I have great taste so it’s only a matter of time before someone else tries to get her attention, so I gotta act fast. However, he’s clueless so he’d think he’s being obvious but he’s not. Like he starts his habit of bringing you snacks and water on your study dates before they’re actually dates and you have no idea he likes you. And he thinks he’s being smooth like, how could you not know he likes you? But it’d be the end of your study session and you’re about to leave and he’s been wondering why it seems like maybe you’re not interested? He can’t tell so he’d just be like, “do you like me, too? Or am I making you uncomfortable? I’ve been waiting for you to let me know how you feel but you really haven’t said anything, so.” AND YOUD JUST BE LOOKING AT HIM LIKE 😳🧍🏻♀️ and you’re blushing hard so he’s like ok obviously she likes me? And he would kind of tilt his head in your direction and raise his eyebrows waiting for you to answer, cause he still wants to be sure. And you’d hold your books tighter to your chest and nod so fast. He’d walk over to you and kiss you on your cheek and be all, “see you tomorrow, idiot.” And walk off like a bad bitch, cause that was pretty smooth, but once his back is to you and his headphones are on while he’s walking away BOY IS BLUSHING HARDDDD CAUSE HE’S LIKE did I really just do that oh shit 🥴
6. A Sunday Kind Of Love - Etta James: when I mentioned Tsuki liked to think about love this is exactly what I mean. He just wants something so relaxed and devoted and when he gets that with you? WHEW he is not letting that go!!
7. Black Dog - Arlo Parks: ok so this song itself is more intense than for what I’m writing for it and what it inspired me BUT this is really how Tsuki feels when he sees you overworking yourself. He can’t stand to see you stress so much over something, especially if it’s school, and then see you push your own limits in the favor of others. It’d definitely be a day where you come to his house to study but when you guys get there instead of pulling out the stuff from his bag he just sets it down and walks over to you and pulls you into his chest. After holding you for a while, he pulls back and makes you look up at him with his hands on your cheeks and leans down to kiss your forehead. “Are you ok?” It’s such a simple question but it really hits home and it’s one of the first times you guys simultaneously realize how much you care for each other. And you’d just hug him tighter and he decides nap time holds a little priority over studying right now.
8. come out and play - Billie Eilish: as smooth as Tsukishima can be or as clueless as he is, he’s also a shy lover for sure. It will take him a while to be genuinely soft and let his walls down and be vulnerable and tell you how much he cares about you, he try’s to show it as best as he can cause it can be easier than looking into your pretty eyes that make him all nervous and choke on his words while he tries to tell you he loves you. So it’ll take some coaxing and you being patient, but he’ll get there eventually and become more confident with his declarations of love.
9. Pleaser - Wallows: more on Tsuki being shy LMAO he wants to tell you he loves you SO BAD but he just cannot make himself do it
10. I’m Glad There Is You - Julie London: ok you mentioned slow dancing in the kitchen type songs? Stop it this is the one - to me this is the introvert love anthem , perfect for you two right? Like you’d be playing music in the kitchen while you two are cooking and this song would come on and normally he’s not a person who shows his affection much but this song would just get to him? Like he almost wants to cry??? He just looks at you, and maybe you’re humming a little, he really can’t tell but he doesn’t care cause you’re just so bright and gorgeous and the more he hears the song, the more his heart is starting to swell thinking of you. And so he wouldn’t be able to help himself. He’d just come up behind you and lean down so his head his resting on top of yours and his arms are wrapped around you. He leans down a little farther and presses a soft but long kiss to your cheek and just whispers how he loves you and hugs you tight one more time before going back to his part of cooking dinner; as if that wasn’t the first time he was finally able to tell you that.
11. Linger In My Arms A Little Longer Baby - Peggy Lee: kitchen dancing music kitchen dancing music kitchen dancing music !! I feel like once Tsuki dances with you ONCE he’d be addicted 😶 like you just look so happy and it hits him in his gut in the best way and he’d kill to feel like that with you again 🖤
12. Sweet Creature - Harry Styles: stop I fucking love Harry styles when I say Tsuki sees you as his home I MEAN it, it doesn’t matter what happens between you two. Sure, like any couple you guys argue and it can be rough sometimes, problems can arise it’s natural. But Tsukishima would never be the type to say something he doesn’t mean or do anything to ruin the relationship, you’re his person and no matter how much you two argue he’d always be sure you know he loves you and you’re the most important thing to him, and you’re very aware of that.
13. I Think I Like It When It Rains - Willis: ok a little bit of angst! In those difficult moments, sure sometimes Tsuki does wish it was like how it was a while ago when the pining and awkwardness was still there and you would go home after studying and you’d both still be giddy and trying to calm yourselves down. Cause the pining and awkward feelings were easy to solve, but these problems are harder, they’re the ones you solve for the long haul. But once he takes a breather he knows this is so much more important and worth it, and he’s reminded of how much he really loves you.
14. I CHOOSE YOU - Adam Melchor: you really would be living in Tsukis mind rent free LMAO and while he was all grumpy at first at the fact he even wanted your attention he’s so happy now it’s so cute pls. He goes to the store and sees something you like?? Yeah he’s buying it. Hears a song you might like? He adds it to the playlist you guys share (yes you would have one from when you would study together all the time and you’ve just kept it and he always add songs to it still for you) all in all, you take up his mind 25/8 now and he’s accepted it with a smile on his face
15. this is how you fall in love - Jeremy Zucker, Chelsea Cutler: introvert love anthem #2, this is literally so cheesy and I hope it fits your taste but anyways!! Falling in love is just so easy for you guys, it’s the easiest thing Tsuki’s ever done, and he holds a lot of pride to that statement.
that’s it!!! That’s the thing!! Gosh I really hope you like it !! Thank you for being so patient and kind to me again, and don’t forget to message me if you need a change
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Pretty People Supremacy Playlist 🖤
for my angel @1010andneji , I hope you love it 🖤
disclaimers: fem!reader, because this a request for someone with she/her pronouns, I believe the reader is referred to as she/her a few times, Kenma is aged up and this is based in him attending University just to be clear‼️
warning: it gets a little saucy in the make out department ?
gif not mine, credit to owner
a/n: ahhhhh!!! I’m sorry this took so long and I really hope you like it and you felt like it was worth the wait! Please let me know if you need me to change anything ‼️ i luv you bae 😔✊🏼 also thank you to my wife @ikigaitooru for helping me choose your matchup here! I was stuck between one other person but we ultimately decided on Kenma, we both believe he exhibits prime quiet himbo energy :) also I kind of went off and wrote a lot on this one 😶 sorry I think? Regardless, I hope you enjoy!!!
Ok so ultimately, I paired you together NOT just cause you thinks he’s pretty but I think you guys would be so good together!! Like you would be so good for him
You guys would balance each other out socially and just be the best pair to hang out with pleaseee
He knows he can be stupid and chaotic with you and you know you can let yourself wind down with him!!
Kenma CAN be blunt sometimes so I’m sure he’d have to catch onto your sensitivity at first, but he’d be so sincere if he ever accidentally said or did anything that made you feel some type of way
And once he is aware of your sensitivity he’s constantly reassuring you in little ways, not only that he understands and is trying to comfort you but just to reassure you he loves you, for example :
I know some people have mentioned that he wouldn’t be into PDA but I disagree! It’s just not in the conventional let me be all over you types of PDA
I feel like it’s just not a big deal to him cause he’s like 🤨 what do I have to be embarrassed for?? This my mf baby and I’m gonna hold her hand if I want to ??
Like, I see him as a big hand holder frfr
He would just see it as such an easy way to be physically close to you and even if that’s just holding pinky’s he’s down!
It would also help him if he’s feeling anxious!
Like he’d fiddle with your hands and fingers if he’s feeling particularly antsy or nervous
You guys are out and he wants to go in a different direction? He’s definitely bringing your hand to his lips to give a quick peck and pull you along
“C’mon, let’s look over here”
AND HES SO NONCHALANT ABOUT IT TOO LIKE HE JUST DOESNT QUITE REALIZE THE EFFECT HE HAS ON YOU WHEN HE DOES THAT (he totally does but he likes to be slick and act like he doesn’t 🙄)
He would also DEFINITELY let you play with his hands if you’re nervous or bored or whatever reason honestly, he’d find it soothing and knows it occupies you or fills a need (and you get to look at pretty Kenma hands c’mon now)
ANYWAYS there are other little ways he’d reassure you too besides hand squeezes and holding
Definitely the type to leave you little notes in places for you to find them and they’d always say such simple things like “hi- kenma <3” LMAOOOO PLS HES TRYING HIS BEST
I think the final biggest way he’d love to reassure you would be words of affirmation (this is definitely a private thing)
I think he’d still deliver them in a blunt manner but that’s how you know he’s sincere!
You two would just be chilling at his place and you’d do something simple like, ask how much water he’s drank today or play with his hair and tell him he shouldn’t overwork himself and he’d just look at you so seriously and be like, “I really appreciate you, you know that?”
And it’d be sort of deadpan but like !!!
And he’d just kiss your hand after - always the palm - and then he’d just press his cheek into your hand before kissing it one more time and moving on like that literally just didn’t happen KENMA KING OF HAND KISSES
Okok moving on before I get stuck on his hands again anskdkdksiaj
So we don’t talk about himbo Kenma enough!!!! Like ok
He’s NOT big and ripped like ya know Bokuto and he seems super smart but I’m telling you this man is a quiet clueless himbo ‼️
You can’t tell me you’d be talking on and on about biology or something and he’d just have this little lost look in his eye while he’s nodding along and smiling softly listening to you talk and you’re like ,,??
“Wait, do you even understand what I’m saying?”
And he’d really just be like no :)
“but your eyes are really pretty and I like watching your lips move while you talk :) (this man is also a king of innocent flirting and you can’t tell me otherwise!!!)
OMG and if you’re even the slightest bit flustered by his comment he WILL notice and he’ll do his best to hide his sly little smile and just grab one of your hands and squeeze it and be like, “keep going, I’m listening”
KENMA HIMBO NATION RISE
Ok ALSO you two would literally just be such a pretty couple? Just like so pleasing to look at????? Like you’re both so pretty it’s unfair! And your style OMG
Like you’re just so soft like the epitome of 🦋✨👼☁️☺️ girl and 🎮🎱🖤👾🌙 boy ykwim???
and his long hair PLS Kenma man bun supremacy 🙌🏼
I can’t stress enough how pretty you two would be it would just make sense seeing you two together ugh
UGH you dying Kenmas hair for him?? And he’d just sit cross legged in a chair while you do it and he keeps leaning and moving to wherever you are around him cause your hands are in his hair and it’s so soothing!! What’s he supposed to do??
“Kenma, stay still you’re gonna bet bleach on my shirt!”
“But didn’t you wear that in case bleach did get on it?”
“I’m just saying if that’s the case then I don’t understand why I can’t hug you while you bleach my hair? 🤨”
Yeah queue pouty Kenma acting indifferent 🙄✋🏼
Just give him a kiss on his nose and he’ll get over it even though he’ll feign his grumpiness to get treated like a baby a little bit longer
UGH PLS I GOTTA STOP I COULD GO ON FOREVER
Bottom line, Kenma’s your quiet little himbo and you’re his loud soft girlfriend, and it’s one of the most adorable things ever
Ok, so we’re finally to what you came for LMAO, your playlist!
OKOK so similar to the first one I made, there’s no theme besides music taste so I tried to make this like a soundtrack of your guys relationship if that makes sense?
I really hope you enjoy and please let me know if you need any changes or would like to be paired up with someone else 🖤‼️ Without further ado, your songs and explanations!
1. Siren - Kailee Morgue: ok I think this one still kind of fits the vibe you’re looking for but you can’t tell me Kenma didn’t see you as some bewitching vixen who’s caught his attention LMAO like he’s just like 👁👄👁 she’s so pretty and entrancing help me! and he’d try to be like haha I’m cool I’m cool I’m fine 😎🥴😎 but it’s so obvious he likes you too (you’d kind of be able to tell with the way he looks at you and how it took so long for the blush to leave his neck and ears whenever he’d talk to you) but he just really decides he has no choice in the matter, he wants you so bad LMAO
2. Juice - iyla: more off the first one, the way you just appeared into Kenmas life LMAO like he saw you and just 😳🥴😍‼️ and once he started to feel real feelings he’d be so 🏃♂️💨 WHERE THE FUCK DID SHE COME FROM??? But he wants you so BAD he can’t do anything about it, and now not only does he just want you 😳 but he wants you and he wants to be yours , pls he has it hard
3. See You Again (feat. Kali Uchis) - Tyler, The Creator: ok this is like THE song to your guys relationship just UGH I know you two would have such pining. Kenma would DEFINITELY be nervous to even talk to you at first cause he’s definitely like 🥴 she’s prettt hhng and he’s so shy and you just have such HEART EYES over him and you don’t even hide it that well LMAO (“it’s them rose colored cheeks yeah it’s them dirt colored eyes 😔😩”- u @ him) and it just makes him so NERVOUS!! But you two would definitely dance around it for a bit like you’d just be so 😍‼️ He’s pretty and shy hehe I like him gimme gimme 😍 and he’d be so flustered by it at first until you guys FINALLY get over yourselves (when kenma stops being a baby LMAO) like you guys jus wanna kiss so bad and literally everyone’s like JUST FUCKING DO IT, SHIT it’s adorable really
4. Doves In The Wind (feat. Kendrick Lamar) - SZA: ok I know this song is kinda saucy an idk if it’s overplayed but listen YOU CANT TELL ME THIS ISNT KENMAS FUCKING ANTHEM!! like he jus absolutely jams to this song definitely a sza stan and loves playing vibey music like hers during his gaming sessions but like the way he would worship the ground you walk on and be like mf im HERS do not get it twisted, in no way does she belong to me buT THE WAY I BELONG TO HER WHEW ‼️
5. Moment - Victoria Monét: ok why do I feel like most of the songs I added on here are vaguely steamy LMAO but ok this song? Yeah whew 💨 this is definitely one of those songs that play while you two would be lazily making out with those little led lights on (you just know kenma has those) and you two would just be laying there and know this is one of those moments you guys are never gonna forget. Your hands are just roaming and caressing each other while your lips are locked and you guys are so breathless and it’s just wow, you guys must have manifested each other cause this moment is so perfect between you two. And even though it’s a little sloppy it’s so intimate and you both feel like you’re living in a dream. messy hair flushed Kenma whos breathing heavy? Yeah I think so
6. Deep Cuts - Healy: Kenma is always trying his hardest to be the best he can when he loves something. We know this we’ve all seen him and Tora when it comes to volleyball and the way he gets with Hinata. And this wouldn’t change when it comes to your guys relationship, he is constantly going to be putting in his best effort to get to know you better, be the best boyfriend he can be to you and make you feel as loved as he can. He’s memorized everything there is to know about you and sometimes he gets lost in that and it makes him insecure about himself from his overthinking (you can’t tell me he’s not a chronic overthinker) and he’d forget to just enjoy himself sometimes. Like Kenma stop stressing, you can relax when you hold her hand. But he’d reach this point with you when he’d probably be being a bit difficult and you’d just make him feel so loved. He had been overworking himself again, which you HATED. You could tell from the bags under his eyes and the way his hair was messily pulled back into a low bun and the way the neckline of his hoodie showed he wasn’t even wearing a shirt underneath. But it was date night!! So what if he was tired and overworked quality time is important to you!!! I mean, that’s what he’s thinking. But you would just pull him into a hug and kiss his forehead and start to undress into comfy clothes and he’d be so confused like ?? Uhm, date night?? And you’d just pull him to your shared bed by his sleeve and under the covers and into your arms while you just kissed the top of his head. You’d take his hair out of his bun and run your fingers through it getting rid of some of the tangles and just be so CARING to him. “Let’s just stay in, you’re tired and I’d rather lay with you while you get some sleep, we can always go out another time.” Yeah he’s in love that’s it ‼️ you make him feel like he’s exactly enough for you as he is and that’s all he wants pls tbis is so long and for what??? Like this could be a Drabble in itself??? Anyways
7. Easy - DaniLeigh: you guys are definitely an exclusive couple but you really show Kenma what it means to just take it slow and relax! After the date night (deep cuts) he knows it’s ok to just relax into your guys love and he doesn’t have to force or rush anything cause it all comes naturally. Secondly , the WAY THIS BOY MAKES YOU FEEL - he just always looks at you with these deep eyes that hold so much love and it makes you feel so exposed every time cause he just loves you so much and it’s so intense l. It makes your face heat up cause he so clearly thinks your perfect. Also, this just gives total late night ride vibes. Kenma would definitely be driving on the freeway and this song comes on and he just places his hand on your thigh while he’s driving and he’s humming along to this song and he can feel you staring at him so he just casts you a quick side glance and goes “hmmm?” And you’re like 👁👄👁 nothing (Kenma is the king of late night car ride music fr)
8. CPR - Summer Walker: ok I don’t even need to explain myself with this one, the song is so self explanatory! You just make each other feel so at home. Point blank ‼️ like Kenma will just think back like 😇 where would I be without this bitch the thought makes him truly sad and he likes to avoid it at all costs
9. Rain - Lucy Park: pls this song is so soft (I hope it fits the vibe ahhh!!) but this is just more of kenma being an absolute softy for you LMAO. He’s not very good at taking care of himself sometimes and you’re always there to be like 😡‼️ NO‼️ and it makes him so soft he can’t help it, it’s not that he does it on purpose cause that’s insane but the fact you know his limits when even he doesn’t sometimes blows his mind and he’s never felt more loved than in those moments (let’s bring up Deep Cuts again 🙄✋🏼 pls this boy just needs someone soft to put him in his place LOL)
10. moonlight - dhruv: ok but when Kenma knows he’s in love with you, he has to tell you. And what better way to tell you than, well, tell you. He’d definitely try to plan it in his head to be perfect like ok what’s her favorite place? Where’d we first meet? Should I tell her there? Should our song be playing in the background? Kenma, your himbo and over thinker tendencies are showing, just tell her already! It’d be early in the morning, and you two are making breakfast together while he’s listening to you ramble on about the recent events of your favorite show and he’s just smiling and nodding, doing his best to recall the other plot points that have happened. And you, distracted with your ranting, go to take a bite of your freshly made breakfast- which is still scalding hot. You IMMEDIATELY start panting and drop your fork, running over to the faucet and shoving your head under it doing your best to soothe your mouth with the cold water. And Kenma feels awful, but this is fucking hilarious. So sure he’s holding your hair back so you can really get that water but he’s dying in the process. Almost keeled over and gripping at his stomach type laughter and you’re swatting at him to no avail and he just can’t help himself, “oh, fuck I love you.” He said it between his gasps of air from laughing and didn’t even realize it. Not until you stood up fully with water still dripping off your chin just looking at him. This idiot immediately started apologizing like omg this isn’t how I wanted to say it ahhhh but you assure him this was perfect, and that you love him too (pls love this man he can’t help but love you too)
11. Easily - Bruno Major: does this count as angst? ok call back to Kenma being an overthinker who overworks himself and probably overlooks his own needs at times, there’s bound to be some tension between you two at times. You’re concerned about his health and he insists he’s fine but you know he’s not, and while I don’t ever see him blowing up on you I could see little arguments about his self-care habits. Sometimes he stays up too late, or he’s stressing himself over something that doesn’t need that much thought! Regardless, he knows you just love him and he does the same thing for you and he just needs to get better at not being so stubborn when it comes to taking care of himself. And he just hopes that you know he loves you and appreciates what you do for him even though it doesn’t seem like it all the time, and that hopefully you won’t give up on him.
12. Streets - Doja Cat: ok I added this one mainly for the vibes but like you can’t tell me Kenma isn’t pined over in university LMAO. Like he’s pretty and polite but also indifferent, mentally ill bitches eat that shit UP; and there’s PLENTY of those in university LMAO. And like you aren’t a toxic possessive person don’t worry but MAN he’s fighting these girls off with a stick at this point LMAO and he just doesn’t get it pls, like he’d definitely be the partner in an assignment who just comes prepared and is kind of quiet to a fault but is so nice and just gets his shit done. Would also offer a pencil if you forgot one and maybe I’m just a whore but that gets me everytime 😌
13. Kiss U Right Now - Duckwrth: ok mainly for the vibes but !!! You and Kenma in the kitchen cooking and this song comes on and he comes up behind you and turns you around and your faces are all close and he keeps singing “I think I wanna kiss u” and smirking but he’s just ghosting his lips over yours instead and moving his head back every time you try to kiss him and giggling before doing it all over again! giggly Kenma supremacy
14. Butterfly - UMI: ok we been talking about how much Kenma would be devoted to you, but like you wouldn’t be the same!!!! Kenma means so much to you and you do your best to show your care and all you wanna do is see him happy as much as he wants the same for you, omg you guys are so in love it’s gross 🤢
15. Pick Up Your Phone - Hojean: what more can I say!!! You guys just love each other and love spending as much time together as you can!! (I like ending these playlists with a really happy mood :) )
Here it is! Thank you for being so patient and I really hope you like this! I always get nervous posting for my baby’s 🖤 love you cutie!
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this is my first post
Hullo. This is my 3rd time rewriting this, because sumthin’ kept fucking up every time I tried to write it. But let’s hope this time goes smoothly cause I got a lot to say. I don’t have anywhere else to put this, so I decided, why not come to Tumblr and see what everyone else thinks.
So, let’s get started.
I have been a Gleek since I was in 6th grade. And as much as I know that the show is cringey and hard to watch, my sister and I genuinely enjoyed it (although now we mostly watch it ironically). And we always had a favoritism system going, our favorite characters were blatantly obvious, and we were fishing for least favorite characters when we could. So, our lists of favorite characters/ships looked a little something like this:
-Brittany S Pierce
-Jessie St James
And even though that doesn’t seem like there’s anything wrong with that set up in particular, I’m going to explain to you why my views have changed. Especially on my least favorite characters. And disclaimer!! Any and all of these characters that I list on my least favorites have nothing to do with race, gender, disability, sexuality etc. They are solely based on personality and how their actions affected others. That’s it. That’s what I’m basing it off of. Same goes for my favorite characters as well. And believe me I will give a lengthy explanation for each and every one of them I promise.
So I’m going to be listing the least favorites from LEAST bad/toxic to MOST bad/toxic. And don’t be upset if one of your favorites are on here. Just because I don’t like them doesn’t mean you can’t like them. Just make that clear. These are only things that I’ve picked up and I’ve noticed throughout the show and watching back important clips and such from the show.
Coming in at #7: Mercedes Jones:
I know what’s coming already. And I’m going to have to tell y’all this loud and clear. Mercedes is not a diva. She’s just a bitch. I’ve never liked Mercedes, and not because she was black, but just because she had an awful personality and she was awful to the people around her. I think the only time I really saw her being nice to someone was when she was dating Sam, or when she was dating that football player. And a few times when she was with Kurt.
The main problem I have with her is in S1E3: Bust Your Windows, she busted Kurt’s front windshield all because he had a crush on someone else. And I can guarantee you guys this. If a guy did that to a girl, like if Kurt had done that to Mercedes instead, y’all would’ve been outraged. She had no reason to bust his window like that and then get all sassy to him when he got upset about it.
Coming in at #6: Santana Lopez:
And this is another character that y’all are so set on saying that she’s a diva. But no. Santana is a straight up bitch. And before you guys say “she was closeted/insecure/outed!” etc, Kurt was also insecure and closeted in the first season and he was never rude to anybody in the way Santana was. And secondly, Finn didn’t out her until S3E6: Mash Off, and I can tell you she had been acting like a huge bitch way before then.
All I have to do is pull up all of the times she’s been anti-semetic to Rachel, fatphobic to Finn and Lauren, attacked people’s insecurities and was just being god awful. One of my least favorite scenes from her is when she went on that entire rant about why Blaine and Kurt didn’t work out, and she attacked Kurt’s teeth, his sexuality, his dancing, his s3xual appeal, and just about everything Kurt was insecure about. All because he said that he thought Santana and Brittany were too young to get married. And I honestly agreed with him, Britt and San were 19. Definitely too young to get married, and Kurt was just trying to relate his failure with Blaine to warn them that getting married this young wasn’t something that they wanted to do. But no. Santana didn’t listen to him trying to reason with her, she just told him basically “you suck, Blaine really hates you, get your crap together.” And I have always had a problem with it.
Not to mention she called Quinn a slut. And no matter what situation you are in, I don’t believe it’s okay to call any girl a slut. Actually, I don’t think it’s okay to call anybody a slut. Because I’m bringing this back. If Finn had called Quinn a slut, you guys would be all over him and cancelling that character so fast, but as soon as Santana says it, it’s okay? That never sat right with me either.
And again, the way she relentlessly bullies Rachel for everything she’s insecure about, especially her height and nose is not okay. It doesn’t matter how much you dislike someone. Making fun of her nose to the point where as soon as she breaks it, she’s immediately thinking of getting a nose job. That is not okay. And there’s a speculation that Santana was the one who pushed Rachel over the edge to try and fall into bulimia. And I don’t doubt it. Santana is not a nice person. And her internalised homophobia does not excuse anything that she’s said or done.
Not to mention she has Britt wrapped around her finger and she knows that she’ll do anything she asks. Like when Santana was fantasizing about forcing Britt to break up with Artie if she became Prom Queen because it would be “the law of the land” that is absolutely inexcusable. Because we all know Britt is naive and has some sort of DD or autism, and the characters in the show take that and use it to their advantage. Especially Santana.
Coming in at #5: Artie Abrams:
Now before you come for my ass, let me tell you. I actually used to really like Artie. He was pretty high up on my ranking Glee characters lists that I used to make all the time. But now that I’ve rewatched and I’ve noticed more things, I just cant like him with a good conscience.
Remember in season 1 when Tina told him that she doesn’t really have a stutter? Well, if you remember, he broke up with her after that.
But if you were closely watching the show, you should’ve realised that Tina has some sort of social anxiety, (not that I’m excusing her faking a disability), but she has a reason for doing it. She (presumably) took up the stutter because she needed a way to avoid having to speak so much in public. Which is totally understandable! Artie didn’t have to break up with her. She confided in him to finally tell him what she had been hiding for so long and he just breaks up with her??? Are you kidding? That just goes to show that one of the only reasons he was dating her was because of her disability. If he broke up with her so fast for not actually having one. Even though she had an actual reason that she did it.
Another thing about Artie that I hate is that he called Britt stupid. And that is a huge deal. Everyone in the school calls Britt stupid or something along those lines (even Santana) and as soon as she finds the one guy who doesn’t think that way of her, he breaks her trust.
She technically did cheat on him, but as I said earlier, she bends to Santana’s every order and she has some sort of DD or autism and didn’t understand that it was cheating. She even told Artie she didn’t understand it. And instead of sitting her down and explaining to her and giving her a second chance to prove her new knowledge to good use, he just calls her stupid and makes her cry.
And then this one is obvious. Artie didn’t fucking wear c0ndoms while he was having s3x with those two girls in New York and didn’t actually tell them he had chlamydia. Which just pissed me off so much it makes me angry just talking about it.
Coming in at #4: Finn Hudson:
Oh ho ho. Finn Hudson makes me so angry. Let me just start off with everything he did (and didn’t do) to/for Kurt.
Starting with the infamous “faggy scene” after Kurt tried to make amends with Finn for all the arguing they had been doing by redecorating their room. As ugly as it looked (lmao), he did his best to try and appeal to what a straight guy would like without making it too masculine so he would feel comfortable sleeping in there too. He tried to appeal to Finn’s interests as well as his own and had to do it all on short notice.
But as soon as Finn saw it, the first thing he said was “are you freaking insane?” and Kurt just deflated. If you watch the scene, you can see it. You can physically see Kurt’s hard work all go to waste because of that comment. But then Finn follows it up with saying “I can’t live here, I’m a dude.”
That line for me is the one that really made me dislike Finn very very strongly, because he not only said Kurt wasn’t a man to his face, he also views Kurt as nothing but his sexuality. That is further proven when he describes how uncomfortable he is around Kurt just because Kurt has a crush on him. And yes, Kurt was creepy, but after then, when they started living together, he just tried his best to make Finn feel as welcome and as comfortable as he can make him feel. But then sees that everything has been pointless, because Finn makes it a point to tell him that he puts his underwear on in the shower before he comes out when Kurt’s around. And that’s just fucked up.
And a lot of people say that Finn “didn’t mean it” when he said the f-slur, but let me tell you something. You don’t just accidentally say something twice out of anger. If you really didn’t mean it, you would apologise right when it left your mouth. But Finn’s lack of an apology only proves that he meant every word of what he said.
Next is when Finn refused to help Kurt out with Karofsky. I can only talk briefly about this because it actually makes me so fucking mad I can’t explain it. So, Rachel asks him to help Kurt out and confront Karofsky, right? And Finn refuses. Because, and I quote: “We both know I can help him more if I stay on top.” And I think he even says “Kurt will be fine” too, completely ignoring the fact that Kurt is so terrified to go to school, he’s losing weight (there are speculations that he cuts), but Finn doesn’t care about that. He only cares about the fact that he needs to stay popular. Oh and the fact that Karofsky plays right guard and wont guard him during the football game is he’s pissed and they’ll lose. He picks FOOTBALL and POPULARITY over his soon-to-be stepbrother’s MENTAL/EMOTIONAL/PYSICAL H E A L T H. I cannot explain how angry that makes me.
Not to mention, the amounts of times he’s played victim. Especially with Rachel. One time that really pisses me off is when he goes “have you ever thought about what I’m going to do in New York?” and Rachel starts stammering over herself and assuring him that she’ll find something that he fits into since he doesn’t know what he’s going to do with his future. And then he asks her about California and Puck’s pool business. Even though he knows Rachel has been set on New York and NYADA since she was a little girl. He knows that she has all of those ambitions and she has an entire plan in her life and she’s already trying to shift those plans to fit Finn in with her. And for him to tell her that he wants her to give all of that up to come with him and Puck to California is actually more selfish than Rachel is.
Oh! And not to mention he outed Santana too. Let’s not forget that. In front of basically the whole damn school too.
He also kissed Emma.
And he also cheated on Rachel with Quinn.
And then actually broke up with Rachel when she made out with Puck a bit because she wanted to get him back for cheating on her and sleeping with Santana (even though it doesn’t excuse what she did at all, I just think Finn was being a hypocrite.)
And he also cheated on Quinn with Rachel in the first season, and he led Rachel on for the entire first season, Or most of it at least.
Coming in at #3: Mr. Schue:
I’m just gonna speed through this:
-He was a creep/pedo with both the girls and the boys
-He had a savior complex and tried to force Emma’s OCD away and fix it instead of help her
-He encouraged Emma’s crush on him even while he was married
-He twerked with a bunch of minors
-Suspended a minor for not wearing a bra she was uncomfortable in
-He dealt really badly with Rachel’s crush on him
-Never listened to his students’ input
-hallucinated children while he was sick
-Was very awkwardly touchy with his students
-His best friend was 19
-refused to stop twerking even when offered the exchange for a trans student to use a staff bathroom to avoid getting bullied
-overreacted after finding out Terry wasn’t pregnant
Now the moments you’ve all been waiting for. Coming in at #2: Noah Puckerman:
Now I was stuck on Puck for a while, I didn’t think he really was that bad of a guy for a long time. But just one thing Quinn says was enough to sway me and put him this high on my list. In one of the earlier episodes, Puck starts teasing her and being a dick after finding out she’s pregnant. And so she says:
“You got me drunk off of wine coolers and I was feeling fat that day...”
Now if you break that sentence down, she literally says “you got me drunk.” implying that Puck himself wasn’t drunk when this all took place. Meaning, Noah Puckerman r@ped Quinn Fabray. She never cheated on Finn.
Puck purposely got her drunk just so he could get what he wanted. Especially considering she never put out and she was president of the Celibacy Club.
Now must I say anything else? No. I didn’t think so.
And finally, coming in at #1: Blaine Anderson:
I know Blaine is everyone’s smol bean gay bb boy. (*gag) but I have to tell you that he is not a good person whatsoever. I’ll give him credit though. In the 2nd season he was really sweet and I actually really liked him. But as the seasons progressed, he got worse.
In S3E5, Blaine and Kurt go to a gay bar together, and Kurt helps Blaine out after he gets too drunk. Then as soon as he tries to get Blaine in the car, Blaine starts coming onto him and kissing his neck and trying to convince him to have s3x with him, even though Kurt keeps repetitively saying no. And then he plays the victim after Kurt blows up at him and says “well I’m sorry for trying to be spontaneous and fun!” and then proceeds to walk home, getting mad at Kurt for nothing.
Then in another episode. I think it was later in season 3, Kurt meets Chandler. And Blaine had been ignoring him for a while before that, so Kurt starts talking to Chandler only because he makes him feel good about himself. And he obviously thought it was okay because Blaine did the same thing with Sebastian but called him all the time and flirted with him and dirty danced with him etc. So when Blaine goes through Kurt’s phone, he finds the messages and makes a huge deal out of it and accuses Kurt of cheating on him. Then publicly humiliates him in front of the Glee club with a song about cheating.
And then proceeds to go and cheat on him anyway.
And then as soon as they were going to NYADA together, Blaine didn’t like all the attention Kurt was getting after he started to get more fit and more attractive and he was extremely jealous of him and over protective, not letting Kurt have any other male attention. At all.
And Blaine is just super stingy with Kurt and doesn’t let him live his life and then pays victim whenever he gets confronted by him.
Oh and not to mention he dated the one person that made Kurt’s life a living hell for the longest time and decided to rub it in his face.
So there we have it folks. My new least favorite Glee characters and all the reasons why. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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Tharntype Season 2 Ep5 Reaction
Disclaimer: only chaotic thoughts follow
- Type really looks like a little kid walking into their parents room after they did something bad
- This man really just asked how did you know when he left evidence all over the goddamn shop
- WILL SOMEONE JUST TELL ME WHAT HE DID TO THE GIRL?!
- Type pulling off this sunglasses like that because he knows he’s that bitch
- Type has never been more smug in his life
- This girls heteronormativity is pissing me off
- You’re telling me he walked in like a whole ass gangsta to just be like “yo he gay he mine neck off” like go off sis but the level of extra
- Omg I’m living for how giggly Tharn is being about this so cute 🥺
- Tharn really knows his wife too well
- Why is Types default emotion just sassy? And how do I get that
- Is Type really not going to smile for this photo? We love a petty king
- Love how Thorns reaction is just “wtf” to Tharns text
- ALSO THIS DOG IS SO CUTE IMMA DIE
- Okay I don’t if my translations off or if Thorn actually just called this dude a s*ut but I am here for it
- The accuracy of friendship between Thorn and San tho
- Why do Type’s shirts always have some random ass words on them? Why does this man dress himself like this?
- TYPE REALLY HAS SOME AUDACITY COMMENTING ON THIS WOMANS POST IM DECEASED
- Like No I can also be convinced to do anything with a single meal
- Also this all being Tharns plan is more believable than every person in this show FORGETTING THE MAN IS GAY
- I’m really glad they created a multidimensional character out of Fiat and didn’t simply make him into a flat villain - know I feel so conflicted seeing him be all cute and wholesome
- Why are bosses 9/10 pieces of shit?
- The other two players are sitting there being like “get a load of these two”
- Damn Fiat and Leo are actually so cute goddamit - but I also feel for Leo watching the person you like like someone else burns from the inside
- YAAAAS TYPES MUM!!! WHAT A QUEEN LOVE HERRRR 👑👑
- This kid is so sweet 🥲 - we all need someone to make us hot cocoa
- Awww Type just wants his dad and Tharn to get along and he’s just being so mature and understanding and it’s so nice to see Types growth from the first time we saw him on screen it makes me emo 😭
- I’m glad Phu and Type are friends - this is super cute WHY ARE PEOPLE CUTTING ONIONS STAHP
- I’m glad Cir is mostly respecting Phu’s boundaries
- We’re here for all this domesticity
- Still can’t believe No has a government job - this man writing papers and shit with coffee and cake
- Aaaaand he’s snooping lmao
- Doctor is the king of talking himself into situations that he wasn’t in to begin with
- No is such a sneaky bitch I love him! Also calling type immediately with the goss like I can’t with these two
- Type is so nosy OMG
- IM DEAD Type going you’re doing your best to the Doc and then following it up with sorry my friends are fucking idiots - same
- What shit is the Doc causing now omg
- Ugh this boss is so annoying, YOU’RE THE ONE THAT GAVE HIM TASKS THAT WERENT HIS RESPONSIBILITY BRO he has every right to complain but he didn’t
- They really put a banner with “this is in appropriate behaviour” I CANT!!
- Type is actually a soft baby confirmed
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we had to analyze this picture and english and i just wanted to talk about how freaking cool it is (disclaimer: im very dumb and unoriginal and dont know what im talking about but i just wanted to write it down since i think its neat)
so we all know that dali is mainly a surrealist artist right (this piece is called nature morte vivant which translates to living still life, or still life fast moving and its by salvador dali). and i think this is a super cool way to do surrealism since he took a simple idea and built up on it in so many different ways. first he took all these items from a still life like fruits and glasses on a table and decided to show them in this extremely animated and almost violent movement which is a complete contrast to the whole idea of a still life... this is a super cool paradox in my opinion. another thing he did was it looks like he made some sort of cell/germ thing off to the right which is another form of life but extremely small... except hes made it like the largest singlular object in this piece... another cool paradox!! and another bent interpretation of still life!! I also noticed how the apple seems to have two shadows, with one being above it which sort of looks like a distorted version of the same orignal platter that the apple is on, but its all spiraled and extra shadowy looking. (ill talk more about spirals later). I think that the big black piece in the background shows yknow, a typical still life backdrop, but it could double as sort of a bending of reality and what life really is since it shows the cell and the twisted apple and it looks like its even showing maybe a comet or something too ?? which imo is also a form of life bc yknow aliens and water on comets,, that whole theory that i dont wanna elaborate on... but yeah that black bit represents the simplest part of a still life but it also shows the deepest complications of the definition of life and presents the most obvious distortions and paradoxes
okay now im gonna talk about all the neat shapes and patterns in the piece. theres strangely a lot of geometric looking patterns throughout this piece that idk i guess you wouldnt really see in a normal stil life since i feel like those focus on gentleness and softness rather than these strict sharp patterns. the most noticable one is on the right side of the table (i have NO clue what this could mean lmao) and another is the ground and ocean as it moves towards the foreground and sort of looks like its shattering. The whole ocean actually has sort of a geometric pattern which is SO SEXY and definitley intentional bc like,,, you can clearly see that this man can paint water... but instead of the ocean having its typical lively and free and wild vibe that it has,, its very uniformed and almost looks,, not real yknow?? theres also some random pattern on the black background and idk what it means but im just pointing out the shapes here.
okay so NOW im mentioning the spirals !! i didnt catch this at first but the first website i pulled up was like “s p i r a l s “ so i read more about it and noticed some more of them:) i thought this was almost kind of eery bc im currently reading Uzumaki by Junju Ito ,, and if you havent heard of that its this horror manga piece about like? this town where theres a spiral phenomenon or smthn and (im only a few chapters in) the spiral pattern is seen as the basic unit of life but also as something consuming that can turn ppl into a monster once they get consumed ?? if that makes sense?? idk look up the manga for a better description lmao. but n e ways,, i was like “huh? who worships a spiral pattern like that?? thats wild bro what a crazy work of fiction amiright”... but apparently our homie dali believed that the spirals were like,,, lifes leading/superior form or smthn like that and he got really into them around the time he was painting this piece. he was super hyped when he found out that the DNA double helix is... a spiral and was like “see homies i told yall the spiral is the basic form of life... we are all... simply spiral” and i was like holy shit hes fucking right... but thats why theres a lot of spiral patterns in this still life !! bc again : LIFE !! and different interpretations of it !! you can see the spiral most obviously (to me anyways) in that distorted version of the apples platter which i guess is showing like “hey look this object looks like an apple on a plate but NO it is just SPIRAL”. you can see it again in the cell thing which i think might be dna or smthn bc it has sort of a spiraling look. the pillar on the fence is also in a spiral shape. the ocean pattern i mentioned earlier also looks sort of spiraly but i cant tell for sure !!
okay so i think thats all i have for now but i might add something later if i think of anything else... i know no ones gonna read this but its nice to get my thoughts written out somewhere yknow !! even if theyre dumb and dont make sense lmao :)
Pick-a-card: Future Spouse’s Channeled Love Message
Hell-o people. I’m back with future spouse reading. Let’s admit it yall like this shit. Anyway. Today I attempted channeled love messages, now I have a headache. Choose your pile.
The messages were written in their point of view (POV), plus some addition from me at the bottom. There might be some broken sentences or something that doesn’t quite make sense, it’s a channeled message, that happens. I did try to fix them so that they can be understood at least but I didn’t edit much, I.. don’t want to take away the actual feel of it ykno. Many of these messages were spoken from their POV after you guys have met. Except one pile, I think? That one sounds more like they were talking about what would happen in the future. Regardless, pls excuse any grammatical errors.
Feedback in the forms of likes, reblogs, messages is very much appreciated. I’d also love to know how you relate/not relate to the reading. I hope to improve and to be able to give out better content!
Disclaimer: Click Here!
Center yourself and focus on the topic. Choose a number (or numbers) that you feel the most drawn to, as if the number is calling out to you. Try to not choose too many. Trust your intuition and read the message under the cut.
May the message resonate.
Visit my tumblr for more readings!
The Tower, The High Priestess, 4 of Wands (4 of Swords)
Garden (Lady, Gentleman)
“It was a surprise. A shock, really.
I feel like all I had been doing was going through bullshit; my relationships were massive failures, I had to cut people out of my life, things I thought were mine turned out to- they had no place in my life, it seems. It hurt. It hurt so badly to build something for it to just fall apart when I had tried my best to make it stand solid, when I had done everything I could. But I couldn’t do it alone. And the only person who was on the other side, who I thought was in this together with me, broke it all apart. They destroyed it. Everything I had built. For them. For us.
Meeting you was a shock. I thought, hell I didn’t want to believe it. I’d had enough. I- I guess I denied it. Tried to pretend I didn’t feel this pull toward you. This strong magnetic pull. I didn’t want to repeat the hell I went through. I didn’t want to build something just for the other person to ruin it. I was scared. Yes. I was scared. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for pretending like I didn’t feel anything. You might not feel like it matters, you might not notice it even- that I tried to keep all of these feelings and showed to the world an impassive and unruffled demeanor, every time you were near. Hell, every time you were near, it was hard. It was hard to control myself, to deny it. Every time you were close to me I got so much more aware of what I was trying to deny. I want. You. I want this with you. This happiness. The life I knew I could build and had with you the first moment I saw you walked in. I want it so badly. I knew we were meant to meet. I knew we belonged together, in some way, in some form. I had all of these thoughts, and feelings and I think I suppressed them for quite some time. Tried to push them all away.
Whenever we are in a group, with everyone else, all I can see is you. All parts of me become aware and alert. It’s like you are always on my radar. I may not look at you, but I’m aware of every small movement you make. And for every small movement I make, I feel like you are watching. Hah. As if you are watching. I can’t help being self-conscious. For wanting to look the best, to control my movement, my demeanor, how I look- in some way.
I want a ‘happy ever after’ with you. I’m waking up to it. I’m accepting it. I’m sorry. I’m not sure what I feel sorry for. I treated you like everyone else. I think. Is that what I’m sorry about? That I treated you like everyone else when I had known that you deserved to be showered with love. I want to do so. And I didn’t, not at first. I guess that’s what I’m sorry about. I want you now. No. I’ve been wanting you for so long. You pull me in like no other. I’m done denying myself this happiness. This. You.”
I feel like this person has some earth in them. Virgo, Capricorn, perhaps Saturn touching their Moon or Rising. Controlled. They hate messy situations.
The Empress, Justice, 3 of Wands (3 of Swords)
“I keep seeing you everywhere. It’s crazy. It doesn’t make any sense. Every single fucking thing reminds me of you. What the fuck. I feel like I’m in this mess of confusion while you are there sitting and laughing like there’s nothing wrong with the world. Looking all regal. Looking unbothered. While I’m here like this. I keep seeing you everywhere. I can trace everything back to you. Like. Like a TV show for example. Oh you talked about that show once? Every time I see that show I remember you. Oh you ate a candy once. Now you are the brand ambassador of that fucking candy inside my head. I wonder if I have the same effect on you. I wish. Are all of these the signs that I’m supposed to pursue this? Or are these the signs that I’ve gone insane?
I want to be with you. I- yeah… I do. But you look so fine not being in a relationship with anyone. You look so- honestly you look intimidating. I am intimidated. Man. I’m- I feel like I’m setting myself up for failure. This is massive. What I want to do. I guess the truth is staring at me in the fucking face but I also know it will take massive courage to go after this. And man who isn’t scared of a broken heart?
I feel like there are many things I have to shift, works I have to do- to make sure this fits right in my life. To make sure I can give you what you deserve. I want to be fair. I want to treat you like the queen you are. But I feel like a random hobo attempting to get the Lady Luck’s attention because apparently this random hobo wants to ask for a fucking diamond. Man I’m scared. But at the same time I’m- I look forward to it. To what this will bring me, us. To what kind of life I can have with you. Things may not be easy baby, at least at first. But just sit there, and laugh and be happy and do whatever it is that you like so much. I’ll do the work. I think the issues will mainly be mine to work on anyway. I don’t want to bring emotional baggage into your life. Yeah. I want to do right by you, for you. If you don’t see me or hear from me for a few days or weeks when we are friends, just know that I’m probably working on myself. I’ll be honest with you any time you ask. But after. After we get there. I’ll tell you everything. I will probably tell you about this insecurity of mine.
I was hurt. By the time we met, I was ready to move on from the hurt. But I have a baggage, still. I guess it is something everyone has, more or less. I’m not sure if I come off as unreceptive toward the idea of being in a relationship, but that’s just probably the effect of me having all of my focus on dealing with my issues. I don’t intend to appear like I don’t want this, like I don’t want more. I do. But I need to move away and solve my issues first before I come to you and put my heart on a silver platter for you. Kneeling in front of you being ready to be potentially cut in the throat. Fuck. That’s how it feels. That’s how it feels to pursue this. Before I can be ready to take that risk I need to make sure I’m strong enough. I want to leave all of the things that can hurt what I want to have with you.”
All of the cards that you got have 3 and 6 on them, except Justice. Talk about synchronicity lmao. The numbers could mean something to you or them. Or they might see you as having the characteristics of 3 or 6 personality according to numerology. Take whatever fits. You probably will be friends with this person first, before anything romantic starts.
The Chariot, 8 of Wands, Ace of Cups (Queen of Swords)
Anchor, Mice (Dog)
“Honestly you look like you are not ready for me. Not that I’m a lot to take in, but it’s, I can feel that you are done with bullshit. Hey I do not bring bullshit into your life, I don’t intend to- but looking at you I feel like I do?? Like I will? Does that even make sense? It’s like when you see the police; you know you don’t do drugs, but looking at the police officer approaching your car, you cant help from asking yourself like maybe I did it 10 minutes ago?? Did I have a dead body in my car??
I’m genuine. I genuinely want a loving, fulfilled connection with you. I want to give you this. I know you probably have many options but I hope you look my way. I hope you will let your guard down and try this with me. I swear it will be worth it. The day we met you probably were dealing with or had gone through some bad experiences, which caused you to be in this no-nonsense mode. I can sense that. You are tired. I can sense that too. But baby I can show you the good things the world has to offer, that life has to offer. You wont regret it. I’ll- what we have, it will be here to stay, you can trust it too. I’ll make you so happy that your stomach hurts from laughing so much. I’ll show you things to be happy about. I’ll- I want to do these things with you.
Just let your guard down for me. Just for a while, for me to prove myself. Give me a chance. I’ll show you. I’ll promise it will be worthwhile. It’s not a war. It will not be a fight. You wont have to fight so hard for a relationship. It will make sense. It will feel good. It will be easy. I’ll be loyal. I’ll be here for you. You can rely on me too. I’ll be the shoulder for you to cry on. Don’t- you don’t need to act so strong anymore. You don’t have to do so all the time. You can rest with me. You can let it go with me. I’ll embrace you in a tight hug. I’ll smother you with my hug ha ha.
I’ve always like the difference. How small you are compared to me. Alright you are not that small and I’m not that big but I’m bigger let’s- we end the topic now. I’ll be your friend. I’ll be your partner. We’ll go travel. We’ll see the expansive sea. We’ll see the sky from many different countries (it’s the same sky but you get what I mean). We’ll create memories. Our memories will be so happy and so good that they will take more space inside your head than those hurtful things you have gone through. I want to move forward with you. I want to take things fast. But you might not be open to this, I understand. But this doesn’t mean I don’t feel this way, this certainty, this desire to just jump right in because I know. I know. I hope you can see it too and. Let’s take this journey. Let’s- let’s go baby. I’ve got you.”
This person is fun-loving, a bit mischievous but in a good way, and funny. Air sign, fire sign. Could have a little bit of earth in them.
Queen of Wands, 9 of Wands, 7 of Cups (Knight of Pentacles)
Lady, Anchor (Fish)
“You might have felt wary of me when you first met me. I don’t know. It feels like you are, whenever we meet. I know I know it’s- I’m used to it, being the center of attention. I have this charm… I guess. This sounds so arrogant. And I have people around me too. It might seem like I have all the options in the world and it might also seem like I’m uncommitted or I’m enjoying the attention. And it’s not true… I look like a cheater. I’m not a cheater. God I will never do that to you, or to anyone else. I just have many friends, yeah I have many friends. I get along with absolutely anyone. Aaaannd I might, and I’m saying this with all humility I can muster, have some admirers. Maybe you don’t want this type of drama, I don’t know.
You look like an introvert. Haha. Not an insult. Just. You. Sometimes when we get to be in the same event, party, or any kind of celebrations held by our mutual friends, I can see you sitting on the couch talking quietly with only one or two people. And sometimes not even talking with anyone. You. Well. And I’m here, with several people around me and talking and laughing and joking around. And. I want you here to be honest. No. I want to go to you and sit down and make a conversation. Oh I don’t know. You make me nervous. Despite my amazing social skills. You unnerve me. No matter how much charm I have, or how easy it is for me to attract people without trying, with you, I have to- I don’t know. It’s hard to explain. I’m conscious of what I say to you. I don’t want to spook you than I already have.
Don’t be wary of the social side of me. I’m just an extrovert. I like being around people. But I mean it when I tell you that I want to pursue this. I’m- when I do pursue you, I’ll bring in stability. It will be stable. It will be stable and I won’t be flaky. I’ll be here. I’ll take the time too if this is what you need from me. If you need more time for us to get to know each other, then we can have that. We’ll take it slow. You are, you are so beautiful. This might sound cliché- fine this is cliché but you are the most beautiful person I have ever seen. You are the most beautiful person in the room. You look so confident in yourself. You don’t have to flaunt, you don’t have to talk loudly, or do things to bring attention to yourself. You don’t have to do that. You still attract my attention. You can attract my attention just by sitting and playing with a cat. It’s amazing. It’s like we come from two different worlds. And I want so badly to be in yours. To get to know yours.
There might be some jealousy from other people, it wont stop me though. I hope it wont stop you. I hope you hang on, and stay with me despite the drama other people try to bring into this. I’ll make this stable for you. I’ll make sure the relationship is strong, so that you wont feel threatened by those people. I’ll defend you. You can trust me. I’ll make sure their harm wont reach you. I hope I’m worth the trouble. I hope you see me as worth the trouble. I don’t want all of that attention. I don’t want them. I want you. Please stay.”
This person might come off as confident and cocky, but deep down they are quite innocent, curious and insecure. Like a little child. I’m getting Gemini and Leo. Aries too maybe, mainly Leo. And earth. They do want to bring in stability. They will be worried that their social image might deter you from building a relationship with them. This person is earnest. They might also try to appear cooler and more put-together than they feel inside.
Death, 4 of Pentacles, 5 of Swords (10 of Wands)
Anchor, Tree (Coffin)
“The sun is going to rise again, they say. Tomorrow will be better, they say. I feel jaded, weary- most of the time. I’ve just gotten out of a shitshow. I’m tired of fighting and arguing in a relationship. A relationship should be safe, no? It should be- you shouldn’t feel alone in it. But that was what I felt. Alone. It felt like a burden. And I wonder if it will always feel like this. A part of me knows that I’m exaggerating it. That there are good sides to being in a relationship, that not everyone will be similar to my exes. But I’m tired. I’ll probably look tired by the time we meet. I might also look emotionally closed off. I’m sorry about that. It might take us some time to- form something.
I’ll be busy with work too, by the time we meet. Building things for myself. For- who knows what else. I feel like I’ve been working and working and working to the point that I forgot what I’m working for. A lot of things have changed. Work hasn’t. Maybe that’s why I’m holding onto it. I know you don’t deserve to be seen through the same lens as I see my past relationship. You are not them. I know this is something new. But I might not be as ready as I would like to be when we first meet. I feel like I smell of grief and death. And I wonder if you can smell it off me.
I do want to take the chance with you. I want that hope. That- I want to see the sun rising and feel happy about it. Because- I see you with me. I have this image. Maybe sometime in the future after I’ve done moping and grieving, after I have brushed off the dirt and walked toward you. I see you with me. In the bed. I’ll be looking at the morning sunrise. You’ll be sleeping. And the sunlight will fall on your skin. It will make your skin look reddish? Golden? Beautiful. And I’ll be feeling happy. And I’ll feel content. It will feel safe.
I want our relationship to be that. For you and for me. To be the constant thing we both can hold onto, regardless what will come at us, regardless how other parts of our lives will change, I want our relationship to be constant. I want a give-and-take relationship. I have so much to give though. I’ve worked so much that I don’t know what to do with these golds. You can have them. I’ll build a place for you, for us. Our safe haven. But I want it to be reciprocal. You don’t have to buy me things, just, carry the relationship with me. Don’t leave me alone. Let’s not fight. Let’s not scream until our throats feel raw. Let’s not do that. We talk. We deal with conflicts and problems fairly and reasonably, without slipping into power play and toxic control.
It might take awhile before we can build a relationship together, but I promise you that all of these experiences that I went through will serve me. I’ll bring in the good, the lessons I learn. I’ll come toward you with all of the wisdom and care I brought out of the storm. I’ll hold onto the positive things and give you those. I wont make you feel the way I felt in my past relationships. I’ll treat you the way I want to be treated. I’ll learn all of these things from what I experienced. But I need some time. I need some time to sit down and look at those experiences with an open heart. I need to make sure I don’t smell like grief and death anymore.”
It was hard to get the message from this one. I wonder if it’s because of the closed-off energy from 4 of Pentacles. This person just feels dry and exhausted. I feel like they will love you with everything they have, but their heart needs to recover first. When we are still hurting, we are not exactly open to extracting lessons or wisdom from the things that hurt us. This is them. The grieving needs to complete before the wisdom can be extracted from the experience. So you might need to be a bit patient and gentle with this person at first.
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Yandere!BTS: The official Q/A with the Fanclub. (Part 02.)
Hello and welcome to the first ever Q/A session with your ever so favourite boys.... THE Y/N FANCLUB!!!!! Yes, our lovely boys are super excited to answer all of your questions! You, yourself submitted these lovely and AMAZING questions!! Let’s get started!! Shall we? (PART TWO)
Part one/Part Two.
Disclaimer: please keep in mind that some of these questions can be offensive, so please proceed to your caution, this session can take a huge turn, for the negative. These boys can end up fighting. You have been warned by @/gucieguciekook. ENJOY AND SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS.
Warnings: a lot of crack, sexual jokes, sexual puns and talk, fighting, threats, obsessive behaviour and possessive behaviour, jealousy, Yandere, please keep in mind that this is purely fictional and I don’t think that any Bts member would ever act like this! Kinda offensive and triggering. KINKY QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS!! SUGGESTIVE THEMES LOL.
Header credits: @shiori-sama
A/N: this part is particularly juicy.. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I must say.. YOUR QUESTIONS HAD ME RED AS A TOMATO LMAO I CANT WITH YOU ALL!!! Ok. This is finally here. THE WAIT IS OVER. THIS THE LAST INSTALLMENT OF THE Q/A session. ENJOY!!!! ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
The Fanclub index:
(Thank you so so much for submitting such amazing questions! I had so much fun with them! :c)
“You guys! For the last time I’m warning you to stop fighting!” Alina screams at the top of her lungs. But they don’t bulge.
Alina sighed deeply, when an idea coming onto her mind. “There are so many questions waiting for you guys! Don’t you want to answer them?” She chirps.
Jimin stop throwing punches in the air and he looks at the girl. “Really? There are questions left?” He asks her cautiously.
“Yes! Yes! Yes!” She answers confidently. They all stop, Jimin runs back to his place and they all follow him.
“Jeez, Guys.” Alina cringes. “Let’s start.” She announces coldly. The boys rub the back of their necks in embarrassment.
She just gives them a look and reads the question.
11: fanclub, if you could, how would u cuddle with y/n?
“Ahhh! This is my most favourite question!!!” Jimin blushes. “I’d love the skin to skin contact with her. I’d love to feel her body. Ah, I’d wrap my hands tightly around her. And just press butterfly kisses on her neck.”
Jimin is busy daydreaming when Jungkook nudges him.
“T-That’s what I was supposed to say!” He grits his teeth. “I’d love to be the big spoon. She’s small compared to me. I can hide her in me.” Namjoons eyes shine in adoration.
“I-I will do anything for her. She’s so comfy. I love her.” Yoongi answers. Hoseok agrees by nodding his head.
“I want to squeeze her up!” Taehyung bites his lip. “Dude.”
Jin looks up and down at him, “I just want to cuddle with her and play with her hair.” Jin nods at his own answer.
12: what made you fall in love with y / n?
“Everything. It was meant to be.” They all answer at the same time. The smiles on their faces proving their love for Y/N.
“Right! Let’s move on!”
13: so this question is particularly for Jeon jeongguk. What all limits can u cross for y/n? And if u two date, how happy will u be? and what all will u do for her or with her?? How much effort will u put in for her to make her believe ur the right one for her? And last but not the least, we'll support u no matter what.
Jimins eyes widen. “Hey! This is supposed to be a quiz for all of us! Why Jungkook? You could’ve asked me! I hate you!” Jimin complains, his voice getting louder and louder with every sentence.
Namjoon rolls his eyes at jimins pathetic jealousy. “Relax, Park.” He warns.
While Jungkook panics. “I-I love her so, so much.” He finally begins.
“I can cross any limits for her, there is no limit when it comes to her. Y/N and I will get married and have a family. I’d be so happy and grateful. I can do absolutely anything for her. Anything. I-I can prove that I’m the only one for her because no one is capable of loving her as much as me. Thank you. I really appreciate it.” He smiles softly.
“Blah blah blah.” Jimin mocks Jungkook again.
“Stop it, Jimin.” Taehyung rolls his eyes.
“Shall we continue?” She asks sarcastically.
“Yes please!” Jin replies. Alina nods happily.
14: what is the worst way the fanclub has tortured someone? what did that person do?
“Oh.” Alina’s mouth forms an ‘O’ shape. This was a pretty dangerous question.
“All we can say is that Jungkook went fucking nuts on that person.” Jin laughs. Taehyung laughs too, his deep voice echoed through the room.
“O-Okay! Let’s move on!” The girl gets creeped out from the boys’ crazy laugh.
15: whats your favorite thing about y/n, boys?
“Her eyes!” One voice booms. “Her hair!” Another speaks. “Her lips.” A deep voice chuckles. “Her skin!” Another voice replies nervously. “Her smile.” Another giggles. “Her legs!” A voice replies softly. “Her everything!” Jungkook smirks. Jimin was just about to argue when Alina suddenly read the question out loud.
16: How would you look if y / n liked to be called mommy?
The water that Jungkook was drinking suddenly splashed on Alina’s face. “H-HEY!” She tries to wipe her face. “What the fuck Jungkook!” She whines.
“I-I’m so sorry.” He apologises. “I’d love to call her mommy. She’s one hundred percent mommy material!” Jimin bites his lower lip. “Ah fuck, I’m so aroused right now.” Taehyung clicks his tongue as he tries to cover his bulge.
Jin laughs. “You’re so weak pfft!” He tries to wipe his sweat on his face. “I’d call her mommy!” Hoseok answers as he shrugs.
“I-I’d call her mommy too. I-I really would!” Jungkook answers quickly.
“Only if she’ll call me daddy in return.” Namjoon winks.
Alina looked at Yoongi for his answer and he just shrugged.
17: How would you look if y / n were the sticky type?
“We won’t mind at all!!” Jin answers on behalf of the whole club. They nod.
Alina sighs and nods. “Ok guys. This is the last question.” She informs and their faces fall.
“I was enjoying it so much!!!” Jimin pouts. “Me too! I don’t want this to end!!” Jungkook commands. “Sorry boys but this has come to an end! They are waiting for this for so long!” Alina smiles.
18: How would you look if y / n were asexual non-romantic?
“Ah that would be a problem.” Namjoon answers quickly. “Because it would be so hard for us to woo Y/N.” Jimin continues.
“But I respect her decision. But that doesn’t mean we’ll leave her or stop loving her.” Jungkook answers.
“There’s always room for hope? Right?” Hoseok winks.
Alina laughs. “Haha! Right!” They all smile.
“Well, that concludes the interview! I hope you all had your fun! Now I better go! Bye!” Alina waves and exists.
The boys wave back as they stand up.
“You better take care of that little problem of yours, buddy.” Namjoon smiles, looking down at taehyungs tight crotch.
Taehyung rolls his eyes. They all turn to leave as Taehyung stays back.
“Ah the things you do to me, baby. Fuck.” He growls. “We can hear you, tae. Come on!” Jin reminds Taehyung. “We all can hear you.” They laugh.
Surprisingly, Jungkook too.
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even if it is, just for tonight | p. js
☌ genre: jisung x reader, slice of life(ish), fluff, angst?, high school!au? kinda.. i wouldn't say it's a college!au but it's the summer before you move to college, the mood is a teenage coming of age movie where the main characters sneak out and do things but like not illegal things yk, best friends to lovers because i'm a sucker for that!!, inspired by life is strange episode 3 + we go up era/the we go up mv teaser + the perks of being a wallflower, mentions of ex-boyfriend!jaemin, say hi to skater boy!renjun!!! also say hi to college boy!johnny!! they're more of a touch and go but they'd appreciate a hello :-)
☌ songs/playlist: 🎵(yes these go in order of the story,,, the most important songs though are "aint it fun by" paramore and "fallingforyou" by the 1975 and maybe "is there somebody who can watch you" also by the 1975)
☌ word count: 7.3k!!
☌ warnings: food mention, cursing, uhh breaking and entering? i wouldnt really say that but it's more off you jumping a fence and trespassing lol, also this is semi proof read lmao sorry
☌ author note: this is dedicated to my dear friend cam!! (@huangsilks) happy birthday i love you <333 here's a lil fic bc ur senior year got cut short and as much as i wish i could give it to you, i cant, and im so sorry about that. so take this fic in return <33 mwah // all i want to do is live in a teen coming of age movie is that too much to ask for? and that's on the media romanticizing your teenage years!
☌ disclaimer: this has no relation to htbah!jisung at all. this is a completely different universe. thank you.
The last day of summer vacation is always fun until you realize that the sun has started to set and the inevitability of tomorrow starts creeping into your thoughts.
So what were you doing on your last day (or night in this case) of summer? You weren't doing anything special, just looking through your room and going through the various photos you had put up on your walls, recalling past memories from your previous years in high school.
Tomorrow night you were leaving your small town and moving across the country to attend college. Needless to say you were excited to move away and get a fresh start but the one thing you weren't ready for was to say goodbye to everyone.
You didn't have a going away party like everyone else, you decided not to because that meant you were actually leaving. Though your bags were packed and your room was put together, it didn't feel like you were going to college. The realization hasn't hit yet, it just felt like another normal night. You were busy looking through one of the memory boxes you had in your room when you felt your phone buzz, indicating you've gotten a text.
[sungie: wanna go on an adventure?]
[you: wtf? the sun set already, if i get caught i'm done for!]
[sungie: c'mon.. live a little]
[sungie: im picking you up in five, get ready :)]
Park Jisung. Your best friend since, well, since elementary. He's the boy who you grew up with, the boy who you happened to survive all of high school and middle school with, he's also the boy who happened to capture your heart doing the simplest things you could imagine.
He was your first crush, but not your first boyfriend.
He also happened to be the boy who was always there for you, no matter what. So if you were going to spend your last night in the town you grew up in, why not spend it with your best friend, Park Jisung himself?
Seeing as that he was already on his way, it left you with no choice. Grabbing the closest hoodie near you, you silently made your way to your front door where you slipped on your shoes before heading outside as quietly as you could.
It takes a few minutes before you see a familiar car pull up on your childhood street. Approaching the vehicle, you hear music playing that's only being muffled due to the windows that are rolled up and the doors being shut closed.
"Hey." He says lowering the volume as you open the door to his passenger seat. "Are you ready?"
"You're fucking insane." You snort as you buckle your seatbelt. "Wake up my whole neighborhood why don't you?"
"I mean.. Only if you want me too.." He teases, placing his hand on his car horn.
"Don't you dare!" You squeal, trying to grab his wrist before he could attempt to wake up your whole neighborhood. To no avail, you failed which resulted in a fit of laughter from him.
"C'mon. Live a little." He says once more before driving away from your. house, turning out of your neighborhood and onto the empty streets.
"Where are we going?" You ask, watching the streetlights pass by.
"It's a surprise."
"That's so ominous."
"Could you at least give me a hint?" You whine.
"I'll give you one word."
"I'll take whatever I can get."
"Okay, the word is playground."
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" You ask, shooting him a glare.
"Hey! you said you'll take what you can get, and I'm giving you one word." He defends.
"You're annoying." You mumble, turning away from him to look back out the window.
"So I've been told." He snorts, focusing his attention back on the road.
Your first stop of the night is the playground of your elementary school.
It was kind of unexpected because the last time you were here was probably when you attended school here, years ago. To be honest, you were expecting to be taken to the park near your house. The playground there was mostly abandoned due to all the kids on your street growing up, you would still see other children playing on the swings or sliding down one of the tube slides but those were on good days. Most of the time it was just empty.
"School?" You ask confused, watching as Jisung unbuckles his seatbelt and opens his door to step outside, you doing the same. "Jisung, we're way to big for this playground, you know that. Why are we even here?"
"You'll see." He says, grabbing your hand to drag you over towards the gate that they used to fence off the playground. ”Are you ready?"
"Ready for what?" You ask, earning a wink in response. "Oh my god.. Jisung no!"
Before you could realize what was about to happen, the hand that Jisung was using to hold yours was now being used to help pull himself over the chain linked fence that lead to your school's playground. After successfully throwing himself over the top of the fence and landing on the other side with a light thud, he smiles at you. "Your turn."
"What the hell?! No way!" You protest. "I can't even climb a fence! You know this!"
"Actually. That's false." He confidently states, knowing he’ll win this argument. "You climbed a fence Junior year when you were hanging out with Johnny Suh and his friends."
"What? Who told you that?!" You exclaim.
"Just a little someone who's name begins with a little 'Ren' and ends with 'Jun.'" He says playfully, sending you a little wink.
"That brat!" You whisper yell. "That’s the last time I tell Renjun something.." You add, mumbling.
"So, your turn." He repeats, gesturing towards the gate in front of you.
"I can't believe I'm fucking doing this." You mumble before continuing to hoist yourself over the metal fence. Your landing wasn’t as smooth as Jisung’s, seeing as you almost lost balance trying to get down from the top resulting in Jisung having to catch you so you didn’t break an ankle or something.
"See? That wasn't so bad." He snorts, letting you go.
"I hate you." You scoff. "Why are we even here again?"
"I'm glad you asked." He says smiling, grabbing your hand once more. This time, instead of leading you to a fence you had to jump be brings you to a small play structure. It takes you approximately a minute for you to realize where you were and where he was taking you.
"Right here." He says pointing to a red tube slide. "Our first stop of the night. This is where we first met, remember? You practically shoved me down this slide because you wanted to go down it and I was in your way."
You chuckle as the first memory of you and your best friend plays. "Of course? How could I not remember? I got called into the office afterwards because some kid told one of the teachers that I was bullying you. To this day, I still don't know who told on me."
“It was Wendy, if you wanted to know.” He adds. “She told me after she told on you.” He shrugs.
“Of course it was..” You mumble, hopping up to sit against one of the bottom steps that led up to the slide.
"Is this what we came here for?" You ask, looking up at the boy who was currently climbing up the side of the playground structure.
"Ding ding ding! We have a winner!" He yells loud enough for anyone in a five mile radius hear. Maybe it’s because of how quiet it is at this time of night, or maybe it’s because he just got louder whenever he was with you. But those were besides the point, if there were any cops around right now you two would definitely have gotten caught thanks to Jisung.
He makes his way to a safer spot, where he can jump down from the top of the playground. Despite the fact he moved you still scold him for his reckless actions. "Don't do that!! You’re going to get hurt! What happens when you jump off of something and finally break your ankle, hm?"
Jisung shrugs in response. "Well you see, it hasn’t happened yet. You can even check, I’m fine. It’s okay."
"You stress me out, you know." You scoff, turning away from him to walk towards the monkey bars that were once too tall for you, but now are nothing compared to your height.
"I know." He shouts from across the playground. Because of how quiet it was with just you two being there in the dead of night you could hear his footsteps along the playground structure. You could hear it creak every now and then, making you wonder if it was Jisung causing then noises of if it was just because of how old the structure is. You think about how long it's been here, how many children have played in the exact spots you were standing in and how many more will until they decide to finally remodel or get rid of it.
"It's been ages since I've been here." You whisper, running your hand along the cool, metal railing as you climb the short steps that lead up to the top, where Jisung was waiting for you.
"I know right? Do you remember this spot?" He asks, taking a seat on the platform, which barely has enough room for both of you. "We used to sit here and gossip about who we thought were cute in the fifth grade." He snorts.
"Yeah.. And when people tried to come up here you'd yell at them for the password." You laugh. "That was really fun. A simpler time." You add, going back replaying through some of your memories which were long forgotten.
For the next couple minutes you and Jisung just sit there, reminiscing to when you were both small children, where your only worry was your guy's spot on the playground being stolen.
“This is nice..” You think to yourself. “It feels the same, just like the good old days.”
"Uhm." Jisung coughs, getting your attention. "We better get going. There are more stops to go and well, we don't have all night do we?"
"Oh. Yeah." You sigh, not wanting to get up from your spot. "Where are we going now?" You ask.
"You'll see." He says, flashing you a grin.
You smile, rolling your eyes at the boy in front of you, who was now attempting (and failing) to slide down the slide in front of you.
"It’s not slippery anymore." He frowns.
"Well, yeah." You giggle, making your way down the same way you came up. "It's been years Sungie. What'd you expect?"
"I dunno. The same amount of slipperiness?"
"You're silly." You tease, lightly pinching his cheek. "Let's go." You’re about to walk away when Jisung grabs your wrist, stopping you from waltzing away to his car.
"Are you sure?" He asks. "You were kinda hesitant to jump a fence you’ll sure you'll be ready to do whatever else I have planned for tonight?" He teases.
"Depends." You hum. "Are we going to get into any kind of trouble?"
"That's up to us."
"Then of course I'm down." You say, dragging him back the way you entered.
The next stop is in the city near your small town. To be more specific it's the rooftop of one of the many parking garages your city has. Jisung's car is the only car parked right now due to the time being nearly twelve thirty in the morning, and you just can't help but wonder why you spent the last half an hour driving to an empty parking garage.
"Okay Park Jisung, why are we here?" You ask, leaning against the railing to look outwards for any sign of reason.
"Well first of all, if you're looking for the reason why you're on the wrong side." He chuckles, leading you towards the opposite side of the rooftop. "And if you look to your left you'll see a small venue." He says in one of those touristy guide voices, earning a giggle from you.
"Hey! Isn't that where we-"
"Saw our first concert?" He cuts you off, finishing your sentence.
"Yeah.. I remember that night. We skipped school that day to make sure we made barricade." You snort.
"It was definitely worth missing a pop quiz and two weeks of being grounded." Jisung comments.
"You act like you didn't sneak out every night during those two weeks." You joke, lightly punching his arm.
He gives you a small pout and a fake "ow." in response. "Well, yeah?" He replies. "How else was I going to see my best friend?"
"Anyone ever told you you're annoying?" You ask rolling your eyes, leaving the edge of the rooftop to walk towards the center.
"Mmm." He hums, looking up to indicate that he was thinking. "I don't think so."
"Well, you are." You say before asking "So why the rooftop?"
"I'm glad you asked." He starts, pulling out a tiny speaker from his jacket pocket. "Remember how you said you were kinda sad that we haven't gone to a concert in a while?"
"Well congratulations y/n l/n because here I have a tiny speaker that'll make it feel like we're having our own mini concert on the top of this garage building tonight!" He exclaims in a fake announcer voice.
Giggling, you smile at him before going along with the joke. "Oh wow? My own private concert? Right here? Right now? With the only relevant person in my life? How could I even think about passing that up!?"
Jisung snorts before handing you the wireless speaker, allowing you to connect your phone to it. The first song you play is "Ain't It Fun" by Paramore for the sole being of it being that song.
"Paramore?" Jisung asks, a bit confused on why you chose this song out of all things to play.
You smile at him before placing the speaker on the ground. Taking both his hands you say, "Jisung. It's fucking Paramore! Do you not remember this song? This is the one we used to blast on my speakers in my bedroom whenever we had a good day. I miss that. Now c'mon! Dance with me!" You giggle, dragging him away from the speaker and to an emptier spot in the parking lot. And so he does. It's not any choreography or anything, it's just you two jumping around on a rooftop to one of your feel good songs. A carefree moment to be exact, where it feels like nothing really matters anymore.
Jisung smiles, backing away from you to watch as you jammed your heart out. If anything, he would give everything just for you to have this moment forever. He knows how stressful life can be, not to mention how hard you worked just to barely make it into your dream school. He also knows how hard it is to feel alone, so he really isn't surprised that your chose thing song because it was your song. Jisung knows a lot more than you could ever know, so if it means he only has one night left to give you everything, then so be it.
Before you know it you watch as he runs towards you, engulfing you in a hug. Shocked, you try your best to look up towards the boy who had you in his arms. If you weren't this close to him you probably wouldn't have noticed the slight glossy look over his eyes, deciding not to touch on it for now and just accept the hug as the song fades into background noise.
"You're leaving tomorrow." Jisung whispers, before pulling apart from the hug, placing his hands on your shoulders. "You're leaving, tomorrow." He states once more this time, more softly while looking at you in the eyes. "You're gonna go off to some college and find a new, maybe get a new boyfriend, and even get a life of your own."
"You know I'll never replace you." You respond back, voice barely above a whisper. You were looking at the cement on the ground or the buildings that were only light being lit up by the various lights around or the night sky, which you definitely haven't seen in a while. You were looking anywhere, everywhere that wasn't your best friend, because you knew for a fact if you looked at him in this moment you would cry.
"But hey," You say speaking up, finally getting the courage to look him in the eye. "That all starts tomorrow. I'm still here right? We still have what? Like twelve hours? So let's make the most of it while we still can, okay?"
Jisung looks down at you before giving you a sad smile. "Actually it's seventeen hours." He sniffs, letting out a light laugh.
"Okay? So? I've got seventeen hours to spare, do you have seventeen hours to spare?" You ask, teasingly.
"You can have all my time in the world, y/n." Jisung replies, pulling you back into the hug.
"Glad to know." You giggle. "Because I'm willing to give you all of mine."
Soon enough the song ends and you hear the beginning of Fallingforyou by The 1975 start to play.
"Hey," Jisung whispers. "I- Uhm. You know this song reminds me of you?" He says.
"It's does?" You ask, voice muffled due to the fact you were speaking into his chest. "Why?"
"Oh god." He starts. "You can't make fun of me for this though." He says pulling away from the hug.
"I won't. I promise."
"Okay well.." He starts, walking away from you. "Here goes nothing.." There's hesitation in his voice and you can't tell if it's because what he was going to say would hurt you or if he just never planned on telling you. It's silent for a few seconds before he breathes in and let's out a sigh.
"I used to like you, y'know."
Though this is just the start of his sentence you wonder why it already began to hurt. Perhaps it could be because he started his thought off with 'I used to like you.' Used to, meaning not anymore.
"Back in the beginning of Sophomore year, when I saw that you started dating Na Jaemin I realized how much I liked you. And when I saw how much you were with him and how much fun you were having with him I couldn't help but wish that were me.. I couldn't help but wonder what would've happened if I figured out my feelings before you got with him. And even after you two broke up, I couldn't help but wonder what would happen if I just confessed to you, out of the blue."
"Is that so?" You ask, walking towards the boy who was now seated on the hood of his car.
"Yeah." He whispers, looking down so he didn't have to face you.
"Well, then I have a confession to make." You state, hoping onto the empty space next to him to take a seat. "I used to like you to."
"I did." You hesitantly state.
"Oh.." He whispers. "How long ago?"
"A while ago." You say softly. "I never wanted to risk anything because I didn't want it to affect our friendship. I didn't want to imagine what would happen if we ended up breaking up on a bad note. I didn't want to risk losing my best friend."
"Oh." He sighs.
"What do you think would've happened if we dated?" You ask.
"I dunno actually. I mean, I don't think much would really change.. We're already pretty close, and we basically act like a couple anyways. Just look at us right now." Jisung responds.
You didn't realize it but currently you were snuggled up against his side, with his arm wrapped around you. If Jisung didn't point it you probably wouldn't have noticed. "We do everything together, and we always bring each other gifts. We even went to prom together, remember?"
"Well yeah.. as friends."
"That's besides the point. I'm talking about how people see us y/n. Go ask anyone, Donghyuck thought we were dating."
"He doesn't count. Donghyuck thinks everyone is dating." You snort.
"Okay, then ask Renjun. The reason why he told me you jumped that fence was because he thought that Johnny was gonna steal you from me."
"Yeah. His exact words were 'You're girlfriend just jumped a fence to hang out with J. Suh and them. I'd be careful if I were you, Johnny's known to steal each other's girls.' You should've seen how confused I was and how awkward it was to explain to him that we weren't a couple." Jisung laughs. "He was so confused."
"He thought we were dating?"
"Jisung." You state, looking up at him. "This is my last night here. And before you tell me to shut up and enjoy the moment I want to tell you one thing, okay? It's really really important to me and I feel like if I don't tell you this right now, I may never will."
"Geez, you're dramatic." He jokes. "What's so important anyways?"
"I still like you."
"Oh.." He whispers. "Oh? Wai-Wait. You still like me?"
"Yes, like like-like." You chuckle.
There's a moment of silence before anyone says anything else. The only things making noise are the sound of distant cars that you hear drive by, along with the wind as it decides to pick up a slight breeze. Your phone is still playing music but you can barely hear it over your light breathing, which to you, sounds like the loudest thing on world. Your head is occupied with thoughts on why you decided to confess right now and Jisung is left trying to process what you just told him. It only lasts for a few seconds, a minute at most, but it feels like an eternity.
"Hey y/n?" He says softly. You snap your head up, looking towards him. Half of you is ready to hear whatever he has to say while the other half of you is worried that you just ruined everything with four little words. "Yeah?" You ask as your voice cracks a little.
"I still like you too."
"So the question becomes, what are we?" You whisper, looking back down at the ground. "I leave tomorrow."
"That doesn't mean anything.." Jisung mumbles.
"What are you talking about? Yes it does. It means everything."
"No, it doesn't." He states, jumping off of his car hood to stand in front of you. "Think about it, you leave tomorrow right?"
"Well, like you said. You're still with me right now and we've still got-" He stops, taking a second to glance at his phone to check the time. "About sixteen and a half hours to spare.. So, why not make the most of it?"
"What are you implying?"
He sighs, taking a step closer to you to grab both your hands and pull you off his car hood himself. "Will you, y/n l/n, be my girlfriend? Even if it is, just for tonight?"
You squeeze his hands, unsure of what to say. Of course you want to say yes, this is one of the moments you've been waiting for! Something you never expected to happen! So why were you feeling so unsure?
Maybe it's because you knew this wouldn't last forever, or maybe it's because it was your best friend. Either way, each option had it's pros and cons. You just couldn't figure out which ones outweighed the other.
If you say yes, then you would've got to experience your long term crush being your boyfriend. But it also meant it would end in less than 24 hours, and what if you didn't want that? Sure long distance is an option, but would you be able to do it?
If you say no.. Then what would happen? Would tonight just end up awkward? You didn't want to pine after some boy for so long, and you sure didn't want Jisung to feel embarrassed, especially since both of you just confessed to each other.
So what do you say? You don't have all the time in the world to pick an answer.
"If I were to say yes.." You say, speaking up. "Do you promise nothing will change between us afterwards? Will we still be friends after that?"
"We can be friends." He says. "Or we can be more than friends. We can be whatever you want. I just want you to be happy."
You sigh, letting go of his hands, only taking a second to look at him.
"What?" He asks, moving to get closer to you.
"Nothing." You sigh. "Just thinking."
"About.. us.. You know.. What are we going to do once the sun comes up?"
"Cry and then kiss some more?" He jokes, hoping to lighten the mood a bit.
"Sungie.. I'm being serious. What are we gonna do?"
"I don't know, y/n. If I'm going to be honest I don't want to think about it either.. I didn't think that far ahead!"
"I know you didn't but we have to talk about it. It's bound to happen."
"Us.. breaking up.."
"You didn't even accept my offer and you're already thinking about us breaking up?" He asks. In his head it sounded okay, but by the look on your face he can tell it came off differently.
"What?" You ask.
"We could always do long distance y'know.."
"Sungie. Look at me." You sigh, looking at him in the eyes. "I'm moving across country and you're staying here, without me. What did you think was going to happen?"
"I didn't think anything was going to happen! I just wanted to spend one night with you as my girlfriend!" He yells, and you take a step back at the sudden volume change.
"You expected me to say yes?"
"No! Of course not! I didn't even plan any of this! I prepared for the worst, but then you brought up the whole liking thing and it just.. I don't know?! Gave me hope?"
"I don't know.. what'll happen when the sun comes up, y/n. I don't know what'll happen at all. I just want you to be happy.. and if that means we have to finish this night as just friends, then I'll be okay with that. We can pretend like nothing happened and we can just go on-"
"What if I don't wanna pretend like nothing happened?" You ask, cutting him off.
"What if.. I wanna say yes, but I'm just too scared to?"
"Why would you be scared?" He asks.
"Because.. if I do.. and this happens to be the best night of my life.. I don't want it to end."
"The answer I want to give you is, 'it doesn't have to end.' but that would just be a broken promise on my part." He sighs, giving you a sad smile. "But the answer I will give you is, we can make the most of it, but that's only up to you. So I'm asking you again, y/n l/n. Will you be my girlfriend?"
"Yes." You sigh, nodding your head reluctantly.
He pulls you into a hug and even though it's just a hug, it's one of the best hugs you've ever experienced. It's more on the comforting side, which would explain why you felt warm and at home. But it different from the hugs you've shared before.
"So where are we off to now?" You ask, ready to officially start tonights adventure. It comes out more muffled due to the fact that you're still holding each other.
"You're so eager." Jisung pouts. "Can't we just stay like this for a while?"
"I suppose so.. It's nice."
The third stop of the night is diner just a couple minutes away from your high school. It's open 24hours meaning you'd see students come here after dances and school events, two of them being you two. One of the convenient things about this place was that it also had a small arcade connected to it. Maybe it was just a marketing strategy, but it worked so this is where you spent the majority of your free time.
"Hungry?" He asks, pulling up in the parking spot in front of the entrance door.
"Why are we here?" You ask, glancing over at the radio to check the time. "It's three am.."
"So?" He asks. "Let me take you on a date. We can even share a milkshake if you'd like." He teases.
"How romantic." You snort.
"Y/n!! I'm being serious!" He whines. "Do you know how badly I've wanted to take you on a date here?"
"Well.. Technically we have gone on one, multiple to be exact." You claim.
"Oh yeah? Name them."
"Our study sessions for SAT's?"
"I meant a proper date! You call suffering together while we complain about the future a proper date?!" He exclaims.
"Okay then how about all the times we came here after a dance or sport event hmm?" You ask.
"Those don't count! We went as friends!"
"I like to count them as dates.." You admit. "After all, they're the best ones I've been on."
"Oh really?" He asks. "Better than the ones that Na Jaemin has taken you on?"
"Uh, yeah? Of course?"
"Take that Jaemin!" He exclaims, causing you to giggle.
"What's your deal with him anyways?" You ask, curious on what he has to say.
"Well.. he's the person I'm competing with, right? For best boyfriend?"
You roll your eyes. "It's not a competition. Besides, if it was, then you'd automatically win." You tease. "So are we going on a date or what?"
Jisung giggles. "Yeah. Let's go."
The diner is empty. There isn't anyone but a lone police officer, drinking a cup of what you assumed to be coffee; two girls who happen to look like they're on a date, and another boy, who seemed to be around you and Jisung's age, working on paper of some sort.
Taking your seat in a familiar spot you look past Jisung (who was seated in front of you) and out the window behind him. You still have a few more hours until the sun comes up, but seeing the moon slowly make it's way down hurts just a bit.
"Hey." Jisung says, drawing your attention back at him. "You zoned out a bit there, you're not falling asleep on me are you?" He teases.
"Pffft! You wish!" You say a little bit too loudly, earning a glare from the cop seated a few booths away from you.
"So about that milkshake.." You trail off. "What flavor did you get?"
You scrunch your nose at his answer. "Why?"
"I dunno." He shrugs. "It's pink, I thought it'd be romantic."
"That wasn't a compliment."
"I'll take it as one."
"You're lucky you're cute."
"You think I'm cute?"
You scoff at him. "Of course I do."
"Ah, okay. Cause I think I'm cute too." He snickers.
"Hey!" You gasp, earning a light laugh from him.
"It's okay I think you're cute too." He says scrunching his nose.
You stick your tongue out at him, looking away to fake being upset.
"Ah boo hoo. Don't be like that."
You're just about to argue back when the waitress who took your order earlier places down the milkshake that Jisung ordered in the middle of you two. She also drops two straws on the table along with it. Both of you thank her and after she leaves you decide to ask Jisung a question.
"Hey Sungie?" You ask, ripping off the paper wrapping to your straw. "Why this place?"
"You're kidding me, right?"
With a smile, you shake your head no at his response and he lets out a sigh.
"Do you really want to know?"
"Yeah!" You nod. "Why?:
"This is where I realized that I was in love with you."
It takes a second for you to process what he had just said. It doesn't hit you right away but the more that you think about it, the more you realize what he meant.
"O-Oh.. Here?" You ask, as if you were unsure of where you were.
He nods in response and watches as you try to put together the pieces of how he figured out he loved you.
"Why?" You ask. "It's not like we've done anything special here. The most we've done is come here after prom.. and the rest of the dances I guess, but prom is the only one that I can really think about."
He giggles. "It doesn't have to be a big event for it to mean something y'know. I realized I was in love with you the summer going into sophomore year. You remember how we came here that night? After I so happened to convince you to sneak out and come to the movies with me?"
"Duh!" You exclaim. "How can I ever forget that?! I had to climb out my fucking window for you, do you know how scary that was? And we had to walk all the way there because neither of us could drive yet!"
"Hey in my defense I said that Johnny could've driven us. You just didn't wanna get caught!"
You roll your eyes at him. "No. That is not why, and hey! Don't try to make this conversation about me! You're the one who's supposed to be explaining stuff right now!"
"Damn." He scoffs. "Ya caught me. Well, anyways, before I was rudely interrupted-"
"You're the one who asked me a question!" You defend.
Ignoring you, he continues. "You remember how we were sitting in this spot, complaining about sophomore year before it even started?"
"Well you were going off on some kind of rant- I don't even remember what it was about- but you just kept talking and you didn't seem to notice that I wasn't listening because I was too busy admiring how you looked. Maybe it was because it was the middle of the night, and both of us were very much sleep deprived but for some reason, it just hit me. I don't remember what it was about you, but it was that moment when I realized 'oh my god. this is what it's like to be in love.' y'know? Like you're finally realizing what it's like to be in love with someone, rather than just loving someone. Do you get what I mean?"
You shake your head no.
"Oh c'mon!" He whines. "I can't be the only one who knows what I'm talking about! It's like finally realizing what all the love songs are about, it's just like.. some kind of feeling! And it was just different how I felt from you, being my best friend, and you, being the person I had a crush on. I don't know how to explain it.. but it was just.. amazing."
"Yeah?" You ask.
"Yeah." He nods.
"Is that so? Well.. then maybe I do know what you're talking about."
"What do you mean?" He asks.
"You just did it."
"Wha- huh?! What did I do?"
"You're cute." You giggle.
"You weren't listening, huh?" He says, smiling.
"Nope! Not at all."
"So you do know what I'm talking about then?"
"Of course I do."
"You're so cute." He giggles.
"I know." You respond.
"I'm glad we agree."
The last stop of the night is some place familiar. You didn't expect this location as much as you did others, so when Jisung decided to park here you didn't know what else to say.
"We're at.. your place?"
"Yeah." He nods, walking towards the gate that lead to his backyard.
"We're not going inside?" You ask, confused on where you were going.
"Pffft. Inside? Why would we go in there? Now c'mon, let's go."
Following Jisung into his backyard is nice. You see a lot of roses and plants that hug the side of his house. As you continue to walk you get various memories from when you two would hang out back here, before you got bored and decided that there was more to the world than Jisung's backyard.
"Okay. Do you want to go first? Or do you want me to?" He asks once you reach a ladder that lead to the roof of his house.
"You chose a ladder?" You whine. "Why didn't we just climb out one of your windows or something?"
"Because y/n!" He teases. "Where's the fun in that? Besides we've already done that before, why not do something different tonight?"
"You mean climb a ladder to sit on your roof instead of climbing out your bedroom window like we normally do?"
"See you do get me! That's exactly what I'm saying." He exclaims. "Now c'mon, up we go!" He smiles.
It's nicer than you expected. You don't know how or when he did it but he already had not one, but two blankets prepared. You assumed he put it here before he left to pick you up or he just asked one of your friends to leave them here. Judging by the fact that they didn't feel freezing cold, and that the ladder was already propped up to the side of his house when you got here, you assumed he asked Renjun or Jeno to leave them here.
"So.." You start.
"Please don't ask why I chose my own house." He jokes.
"Okay well first of all, I wasn't." You defend. "I was gonna ask what are we doing on your roof at five in the morning, but now that you mention it.. Why did you choose your house? We could've gone to so many other places."
He gives you a confused look, allowing you to ask, "What?"
"Please tell me the second question was a joke." He sighs.
You give him a smile and he pats the empty spot next to him, signaling for you to take a seat.
"Okay y/n, since you wanna know so badly, I'll tell you, yeah?" He asks, clearly annoyed at the fact that he chose his own house for gods sake.
You giggle. "You don't have to answer it you know. I know why."
"Okay, then I'll ask you. Why?"
"Because," You tease in a sing-songy voice. "Where else would we have gone? Technically, we started tonight at my place so why not end it with yours? We've spent a significant amount of time together, right?" You ask and he gives you a nod in return.
"Exactly. So it would just make sense that we have two halves of one whole, right? You pick out the places, and I bring back the memories. Right?" You explain.
"Congratulations. You've figured it out."
"Of course?" You giggle.
"Do you wanna know why we're up here though?" He asks.
"Yeah sure, why not?"
"It's because we can see the sunrise better from here. Yeah we used to just sit on the roof and talk in the middle of the day, or we'd watch the sun set, but we've never really watched it rise together before, y'know?"
"Really?" You ask. "Are you sure about that? We've pulled all nighters together before!"
"Yeah but one of us is either half asleep or just not paying attention."
"Hmm. I guess you're right about that." You hum.
"Do you promise we'll get a pretty sunrise?" You ask.
"Christ y/n. I don't control the weather! Who do I look like, mother nature?"
"Hey, mother nature is badass!" You scold. "She could literally end everything right here, right now."
"I suppose so." He hums, wrapping an arm around you to pull you closer to him. You rest your head against him and for a while you two just sit there in silence, no words just being said. Just the sounds of your breathing plus some birds chirping due to the current time. It's nice and comfortable. It feels like home.
You feel yourself about to start falling asleep when Jisung starts talking.
"I'm really gonna miss you.. y'know." He sighs, turning his head to look at you. If he didn't know you any better he'd think you actually fell asleep, it's only the sound of you humming the word "yeah?" that informs him you're still awake.
"What's the thing you're gonna miss most about me?" You ask.
"You expect me to chose one?" He asks, only earning another hum in response.
"Okay.. Well.. For starters, I'm going to miss seeing you everyday. I'm gonna miss not being able to text my best friend 'hey let's hangout today' and then just sitting in my room playing Mario Kart with you for the next three hours. I'm gonna miss your little roasts that you'd pull on me whenever I do anything stupid. I'm gonna miss our boba runs we used to have each week. I'm gonna miss causing chaos on the rest of our friends because how else are they going to prepare for trouble if there isn't two of us? There's so many things that I'm gonna miss about you that I could just go on and on about but we don't have enough time for that." He sighs.
"Really.. I'm just gonna miss you."
A second passes before Jisung decides to speak up again. "Are you gonna miss me too?"
"That's a silly question." You sigh. "Of course I am dummy. You expect me to not miss you? What am I gonna do without my partner in crime? My best friend and technically my boyfriend? You expect me to move across country and not miss you at all? Are you insane?!"
"Only a little." He jokes, earning a light punch from you.
"If I could take you with me I would."
"So why don't you?"
"Where are you gonna live? My fucking closet? I can't let you do that, you'll get too cramped in there." You joke.
"I guess.." He pouts.
"So.. What's gonna happen.. between us?" He asks.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, we're watching the sun rise, aren't we?"
"I guess.. I just didn't expect it to fly by that fast.." You mumble.
Another moment of comfortable silence passes before either of you say anything. This one lasts for about ten minutes, fifteen at most, with the only sounds being your shallow breathing catching your attention. It's comforting, just being like this. Laying on Jisung's side while having his arm wrapped around you and a blanket hugging you both. The wind picks up a breeze every now and then making you shiver a bit due to the lack of warmth but that only makes you snuggle closer to Jisung in hopes of stealing his body heat.
"Thank you.. for tonight." You whisper. "It's all I could've asked for."
"I'm really glad you liked it. I'm just happy I got to spent time with you before you left." He chuckles.
"I'm gonna miss you."
The sunrise is pretty. It's one of the best ones you've seen in your entire life. It consisted of pinks, and yellows, and a little bit of purple. Though there were wispy clouds in it, it was like the earth was telling you it's okay to move on and go. Some may say it would be a perfect way to end a beautiful night, or in your case, the perfect way to say goodbye.
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