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#i believe not every story has a great or happy end though
velvetwyrme · 2 days
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i eat up ur recs with a spoon and have almost gotten to the end of the list!!! do u have any other self insert recs? thank u! u have great taste
MWAH MWAH ILY !! THANK YOU and yes ofc I have more recs (not as many as last time, but it should still be a decent list to sink your teeth into <3)
Take care when reading, and always be sure to check the tags!
Same notation as last time, with STATUS of each fic labelled as such: Finished, Ongoing/Unfinished, Discontinued. (Unless the author specified that the fic is Discontinued or on Indefinite Hiatus, I will mark it as Ongoing/Unfinished. Oneshots are also marked as such.)
Spicy (Explicit) and/or Dark fics have also been labelled if relevant. (I won’t mark ones with just suggestive themes/moments, since I cant guarantee I’ll catch all of them. Similarly, unless there is consistent graphic death or gore I [probably] won’t mark it as dark.)
MULTICHAPTERS
As always, tread carefully while reading and take care of yourselves <3
Edit: Fixed a missing link or two!
These Masks We Wear - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
TIME LOOPS BABEY!!!! This reader is a delight from the get go because they have been stuck in a time loop and are... rather impulsive because of it, which lands them in a bit of a mess, because these strange, dangerous monsters have just emerged from the mountain. (I'm screaming and yelling at this fic very intensely)
Resisting the Current - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
If you haven't read this yet please do yourself a favour and read it. The premise was enough to get me irrevocably hooked (anti-harem but the gf is ALSO into you. ALSO SHE'S YOUR EX) and the writing is just FANTASTIC. I'm obsessed with the dialogue and description at every turn. Also, I would very much like to kiss Quinn please and thank you. The plot is beginning to set in now, and it's so good??? I have to cut this short or else I'll talk forever <3
ALSO the same author recently posted the first chapter of Wishbone which has me in a vice grip!!! AHH
Comic Classifieds - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
*kicks in the door* DID I HEAR... FAKE DATING? Very sweet VERY funny, with an extremely extraordinarily awkward reader. (Who is also "cute in an awkward, baby giraffe kind of way.") It's sooo good please please check it out.
Stolen with Friendship, Captured by Love - Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
2016... I still love this fic deeply <3 It's so SWEET and it reminds me of the good days of fic... Papyrus is. a Lot to deal with, but the reader takes it all in stride. He is SO full of energy and I want to sqUISH HIM.
Tough Choices, Tougher Consequences - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
I loooooove stories where soldiers get thrust into awful political matters. After you are forcefully removed from the battlefield, the Emperor gifts you his finest gladiator- Papyrus. He intends for the monster to be a toy to you as much as you are a toy to him, but you can't accept that and quickly broker a deal with Papyrus for his freedom.
Already There - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Finished
[Warning: INCREDIBLY SAD AND GOOD]
BURSTS INTO TEARS. Like for real though I adore this fic, it will break you into a hundred million pieces. My beloved son!!!!!!! I can't believe I didn't add this one to my last list it's such an influential piece of my existence like genuinely
There is also a sequel! Which hasn't updated since 2018 BUT STILL IS REALLY GOOD. If you want a slightly less heartbreaking story, the author also has another Sans/Reader; A Tale of Dog and Monster which makes me want to cry but in a happy emotional way instead.
Here's to You, Doll - Mafia!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Ah... this one is very fun. You're a scientist who gets accidentally isekai'd into a Mafiatale universe and becomes stranded there. Unfortunately for you, Don Gaster and his brothers think you are a spy, so you're kinda stuck with them. Also Sans is kinda a little freak in this one at times (/appreciative)
Soul Collector - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
The reader (the Soul Collector) gets transported into another universe and has to stay with their alternate, who is the skeleton's terrible neighbour. You look just like her, of course, resulting in a lot of VERY confusing interactions. I wasn't expecting to, but I actually really like Meyer.
Consequences - Papyrus(?)/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Anti harem, but the reader gets mcfreaking MURDERED (and so does classic Papyrus?!) so now they are both Ghosts. Focus is currently more on platonic relationships and REVENGE but I'm enjoying the twist on the typical anti-harem structure!!
My Soulmate is a Pastel Goth (And Other Concerns) - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Edge is very cute in this and I also feel really bad for him, he's trying so hard but the MC will not give him the time of day ;w;!! I looove me a good tumultuous soulmate fic. (Note: this fic also features Fem!Frisk as Sans’ soulmate in the bg, so if you’re not a fan, that’s something to note ^^! Fr//ans isn’t quite my thing, but tbh I’m really interested in seeing how things turn out here!)
ERROR: Not Found - Error!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Error, gets obsessed with the reader and kidnaps them! It's slice of life, so don't expect TOO much hard hitting angst here, it's more about being woo'd by the strange stalkerish entity who knows everything about you <3
When Death isn't an Option - Horror!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
I'm a sucker for immortal readers, especially ones that get stuck in HORRORTALE of all places. This fic is very fun and plays in the Horrortale sandbox in a fun way- I'm enjoying it a ton so far :]!!!
Additionally... if you liked that or if you're like me and love immortal readers forced to make decisions of extremely dubious morality and sense because of their immortal nature, you should also check out Cadarverous and 𝚎𝚊t. which are both very dark and very compelling.
Babysitting with Extra Morbid Steps - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
So the first thing you need to know is: Papyrus is dead.
... WAIT WAIT WAIT HEAR ME OUT- this is a really brilliantly written fic about like. SO much fucked up shit happening. The reader is Sans' friend, who he has hired/tasked with guarding the various alternates he has. just straight up imprisoned(?!?!). I avoided this for a while because of the aforementioned Papyrus Being Dead thing, but HOT DAMN I'm glad I read it in the end. Delightfully horrifying, but it gets sweet I swear!!! I would say read the tags but those are Spoilery ;)!
Additional note; the comments section often has Really Interesting dissections of characters and their motivations, which if you're into that (like me) then you should read those too!
All You Knead is Loaf - Sans/Reader - Finished
[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]
Super sweet, VERY punny fic that updated over the course of a month iirc. It's a cute food-centric Sans/Reader!
Like a moth to flame…or a lamp - Mothman Horror!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
BIG MOTHMAN HORROR!!! He's so sweet and sad this poor man. He has mistaken the reader for his mate and is trying to woo them again...
Those Times I Met His Brother - Sans/Reader - Finished
Essentially you befriend Papyrus and keep getting left with Sans, during which you grow closer. Love Papyrus' not-so-subtle attempts to get them together afjkdfjsf,,
Just Try and Help (Lil Old Hopeless Me) - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Skeleton reader! Very angy skeleton reader. They do not Want to be here (understandably, considering they were essentially kidnapped) but their former caretaker is gone, and they have nowhere to go.
Lovely House of Bones - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Six monsters get stranded in a snowstorm, and you help them not freeze to death by inviting them into the house you inherited. I'm really excited to see where this one goes :D!
Maybe In Time, You'll Want To Be Mine - Underfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
More!! Soulmate stuff!!!! SOULMARKS BABEY!! Love it when there are misunderstandings! Love it when there are cuuuuute background character kiddos!! AUGH it's cute! And angsty! But cute!!
No Good Deed - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Finished
You volunteer at a local homeless shelter where you meet a strange, less-than-friendly volunteer. Short and sweet!
Nothing but Skin and Bone - Horror!Skelebros/Reader - Finished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
MORE Horrortale content! This one only finished last month or so- it goes from angsty to sweet/cute and it's real good!!
If you read that and want EVEN MORE sadness and gore, the author's other work Vivid Blood, Pale Scars (DARK) is very tragic and very fucked up because you get saddled the Horrorfell boys this time. MUCH Hurt and No Comfort!! All the endings hurt me in different ways and none of them are happy. LUCKILY(?) the spinoff/AU where the skelebros and reader from VBPS get pulled into a multiversal skeleton house; Blurred Lines, Opened Wounds has just started!! Surely nothing can go wrong. Surely.
The Princes' Bride - Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
What if you got kidnapped by the king to marry his sons. "Why" is a good question. And an even MORE pressing question is: how do you get OUTTA here. (Papyrus is a sweetie, Sans is distrusting, and King Gaster is a mysterious weirdo who is a good dad and bad everything else.)
MorTificaTion - Bad Sanses/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Reader from Outertale gets yanked into Horrortale! They then have to masquerade as Sans' wife and Aliza's mother, all the while trying to just stay alive. Not to mention the other Sanses running around... really fun premise and I'm excited to see where it all goes >:0!! Also extra kudos to the name of the fic because YAY Murder Time Trio (MTT) mention!
So here's the plan... - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader/Underswap!Papyrus- Finished
[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]
VERY CUTE!! Love them. Fake dating except there's a third conspirator involved. Each of them was also trying to set the other two up in a couple uwu. Chapter 1 is cute, and chapter 2 is spicy ;)!
Just a Cat - Swapfell!Skelebros/Reader - Finished
The reader is in fact, not just a cat. (He is a shapeshifter, and pretends to be a cat.) Shenanigans ensue.
An Apple a Day Keeps the Asshole Away - Swapfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Unhinged. When I say unhinged I mean it in the best possible way but it IS unhinged. They're all a bunch of little FREAKS. Please read it, if only to experience the absolute TERROR of Miss Bluebell and also Steve. What the hell (appreciative)
Honey Lemon Tea - ...?/Reader - Discontinued
RAGHHH I'm so sad this was discontinued :(( I loved the set up and the mystery so much... the author did leave an end note with how the plot would have played out though!
Shifting Morals - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
You go stargazing and have an encounter with a mysterious stranger :0c?! (It's Sans. He's a cool beasty guy, and he is very very sadly Entirely alone.)
Additionally, this fic was suddenly revived 5 years after posting the first chapter which I have immense respect for.
The Key To Freedom - Yandere Buttontale!Papyrus/Reader - Finished
Yandere Papyrus! Not a common sight, but this fic does it particularly well. He mostly wants to eat your soul at first, but then he starts getting... attached. The bittersweet ending!!! AUGH.
Milky Tea and Souls - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
What if you could summon bitty versions of your soulmates!! And oh stars why are there so many- WHAT DO YOU MEAN MORE KEEP APPEARING??? The reader has a handful of skeletons and more to deal with!
The House on Lane 66 - Various/Reader - Finished
[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]
I feel like legally I have to include this (/lh /j). I finally finished it recently and went "WOAH..."
I stopped reading for a while (because of the length...) BUT I returned to it because I really really enjoy the world building (like holy SHIT!!!) but oh my god that sure is. a Million words now. It is TECHNICALLY finished, but that's only because the next part is in the works(?!?!?!)
Love Grows - Farmtale!Sans/Anomaly!Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
🎵 Love grows where my rosemary goes~
The reader doesn't have a physical body or a way to interact with the world while they watch over Saejun and the rest of the Farmtale characters. They inhabit a scarecrow to have some semblance of personhood, but they remain unable to talk...
Falling - Underswap!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
You are dying. You are dying and all of a sudden your dad is asking you to pick out a fucking slave of all things. The monster does not trust you (fair) and he thinks you are faking your illness for attention (less fair. what the fuck). Really interesting dynamics in this one!
Se Brûler - Grillby/Reader - Finished
[Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]
I reaaaally love this fic! Sweet fluff! Angst! THE DRAMA!!!!! AUAUUUUGH I have too much to say about it just go read it.
Early Bird Special - Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
Old fic that's still updating!!!! Really interesting plot that just keeps getting More Dramatic as time goes on (in a good way). It's a Slavetale AU, in which the reader ends up joining the resistance after a few chance encounters. The author also has a spinoff fic with the same premise but featuring Underfell instead, which results in quiiiiite a lot changing.
nemesis & nike - Various Horrorbros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
The reader essentially starts off in a zombie apocalypse and then gets transported into an alternate universe where they initially think that the various skeletons they meet are zombies. Turns out they are not in fact, zombies, but like most of them still want to kill the reader so...
Rules to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse - Swapfell!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes] [Warning: Contains Explicit Content.]
More zombie apocalypse stuff! Except this time you're stuck there with a pair of weird skeletons! You give them nicknames so you don't get attached, but of course you end up getting attached anyway.
To My Horror - Horror!Skelebros/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Post-surfacing Horrortale fic where the skelebros get to go live their farming dreams. With you! Slice of life with a dash of intimidation and angst.
If you enjoyed the Horrortale/Farmtale fusion, you'll be glad to hear there's also...
The Skeleton Stalks - Horrortale!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Another Horror-farm-tale fusion which has just begun recently! You live on a farm and all of a sudden there is this Big Intelligent Dog hanging around. Eventually, your new neighbors are sent to check in on you and your Great(er) Dog, which leads to some sweet interactions.
The Ruse - Swapfell!Sans/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
This is a rework! I read the original fic while it was being originally posted and I ADORED it, and the rework is superb <3 Sans is the Captain of the Royal Guard, who must fight valiantly against the villanous Eclipse, who exists only to spread terror... and you're just some human chilling on the sidelines, posting treasonous Soriel posts on the Undernet.
I'm so so so excited for it to return auauusgfhfhdj THE ORIGINAL FIC IS GONE SO I CAN'T EVEN READ IT TO SATIATE ME...
Almost Alone - Swapfell!Papyrus/Male!Reader - Finished
I love the sleepy, slow atmosphere this fic has- it's so befitting of both SF!Pap and the MC in this. It's soft and sweet and melancholic auauuauauuughgh I LOVE IT... *bursts into tears again*!!!! Also, there is a side fic which follows different POVs throughout the story, which is similarly well written!
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ONESHOTS
Date night Purring - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot
SUPER CUTE (and slightly suggestive)! Also Edge has a feminine body in this which is always fun. Booba <3
Scares and a Sudden Friendship - Horror!Sans/Reader - Oneshot
Reader's shitty boyfriend leaves them behind in the haunted house in which HT!Sans is working as a scare actor. Sweet little meet cute! (Meet spook?)
Fallen Star - Underfell!Gaster/Reader - Oneshot
An ooooold fic but one that never fails to break my heart. Written from the perspective of UF!Gaster recording experiment logs about the newest fallen human.
Birdy -Mafiafell!Sans/Reader - Oneshot
LET THE BIRD FUCK SHIT UP!! I love the way the Avian... siren(?) reader is characterised... there's also another oneshot in the same series which I enjoyed- love me some weird Creature Body Horror!!
I also really enjoyed the author's other fic: Moss & Mycelium, wherein the reader is a skeleton :]!!
Skeleton's Curiosity - FellswapGold!Skelebros/Reader - Oneshot
SUBNAUTICA AUUUUUUUUUUU YEAAHH BABEY!! I love mermaid AUs and I love Subnautica! Real cute!
Chance Encounter - Underfell!Papyrus/Reader - Oneshot
ANOTHER SUBNAUTICA AU :D!! Except it's just UF!Pap this time <33 !!!
Leaving A Mark - Sans/Reader - Oneshot
The twist(?) made me laugh so hard I almost cried. It's VERY cute also.
Nice to Scare You - Various/Reader - Oneshot Series
A fun series of oneshots of the spookier variety! Or more Halloween-y at least. All very good <3
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MISC. / OTHER
The Escort - Lust!Sans/Reader || &Reader - Finished
[Warning: Contains Discussions of Explicit Content.]
No romance! (But lots of kind-of-onscreen fucking.) This fic feels like looking at a bunch of polaroids, seeing a snapshot of existence. Life out of context. And it works SO well. It makes me feel sad and existential and I really love it.
Rubble & Ramparts - (An R&R-Inspired AU Fic) - Various/OC || Various&OC - Ongoing/Unfinished
Not a reader insert, but it's like. An AU of a reader insert so I'm including it here!!! Rubble and Ramparts is of course, inspired by R&R (Rabble & Rampallians), which was on my previous list but is getting linked here again for ease of navigation
ALEXIS my beloved!!!!!!! I am in loooove with the way things are going in this fic. It's so COOL and Alexis is such a freaking DELIGHT. Also I just really love reading all the notes from the Cutting Room floor, which the author has kindly included in a separate fic for your reading pleasure!!
ALSO in writing this I also remembered there is Another Spinoff AU fic which IS a reader insert (that I'm enjoying)...
Perception & Patronage (An R&R Spinoff) - Various/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
Thank the stars I remembered this, it's really fun!! Also judging by the tags there is also plans for. not only Various Sanses/Reader, but also READER/READER, which is such an underrated thing I love it, but I digress. It's a really fun spin on a really fun fic <3
Teen Livin' - Various Skelebros & Reader + Frisk/Reader - Ongoing/Unfinished
[Warning: Contains Dark/Heavy Themes]
Cute and sad! Platonic reader insert. The reader is a troubled teen who befriends Frisk, and gets to meet a bunch of skeletal guardians. The skeletons have a familial/friend's cool cousin vibe with the reader, which is really sweet! The fic is currently going through a Halloween Special which I'm enjoying quite a bit (Haunted dolls! Ghosts! Blood!! Still very sad :[...)
Something Good - Fellswap Gold!Papyrus/Reader(?) || /OC(s) - Ongoing/Unfinished
Technically not a reader insert since Coffee is the MC, but I can forgive it because I'm really really invested in this and I really adore the character dynamics so far <3 Coffee striking it out on his own is always a fun thing to explore, and I'm excited to see more!!
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I love writing up these rec lists- it's such a fun way for me to rediscover fics I've enjoyed, thank you for giving me another opportunity to reread some of my favourite fics and more importantly to share them with you! I hope you enjoy them as much as I did :D!!!
I'll probably leave it here for now or else I'll end up rereading fics forever lolol it's already like 3am I gotta sleep SOMETIME
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dazed-pine · 5 months
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ー jade, azul, and floyd react to you joining the waitstaff at mostro lounge
content: gn!insert + headcanons - can be read as platonic or romantic (or frenemy like) ask box (rq box) more under the cut!!!
ー Jade Leech :
Jade doesn't recall you "wronging" him, his brother, or their Housewarden. In fact, he's going through all of the interactions you've ever had with him... trying to think why you would join the waitstaff.
When you reveal that you just need money for school funds, he stares at you with a bit of shock. Hardly anyone comes to the lounge and asks for a job. Though... he doesn't mind the forwardness from you.
It's refreshing to receive a straightforward answer actually.
However, he gives you a smile and nods: "Money? I suppose we can form... a small contract. Nothing our Housewarden would give. Just an agreement form."
Basically; job interview, mild paperwork, then training.
Jade personally trains you, he takes you right under his wing and teaches you everything you need to know about waiting on people, making drinks, and even making bigger sales for the lounge.
Jade believes you're most talented at being a host. He enjoys your smile and the small talk you make with the customers. Even when you bring the guest their waters, Jade knows he trained you well.
When he's on the clock, you're usually the host. Seating people, getting waters... all of that. Jade will give you the occasional stare, trying to figure out how much of a panic or relaxed mode you're in.
When you're doing very well, he gives you a wink... signaling that a big tip from him is coming your way.
Working with Jade? It's smooth sailing for you.
ー Azul Ashengrotto :
When Jade first told Azul that he hired you for your claim of "money". He actually laughed at first, but then he quickly realized that Jade wasn't laughing... so this is serious.
Azul is intrigued by you being so forward with this, he admires it actually! On your second day on the job, he pays you a personal visit.
He takes you to one of the farther tables in the lounge and has a quick chat with you.
"For the money? Truly? (y/n) you never cease to amaze me. I would love to learn more about what goes on in that other worldly head of yours..." Azul almost has a wicked grin.
He assures you, that this 'contract' is just a normal work contract, however if you do not give in your two weeks before you quit? It won't end pretty.
Azul comes by the lounge to check up on you a lot, making sure your work is up to his standards... and of course it is! You're being personally trained by Jade. His expectations are always met through you.
He enjoys your hard work, he's even generous enough to give you a raise on your paycheck. Which was surprising for even Jade.
Azul believes you work best as one of the baristas'/bartenders.
When he comes in, he always enjoys a cup of your coffee. Jade's coffee is always his #1 pick, but he also enjoys the flavor of your's.
Every time you make him a drink, he always leaves you a tip. Which you're quick to learn... he doesn't do that too often.
ー Floyd Leech :
Floyd wasn't present during your week of training, Jade said he was busy with his own affairs... that's why Jade was the sole person training you (blessing in disguise... more likely than you think!)
When he saw you waiting on a table, he went right to Jade and asked what you were doing here. Jade was happy to tell him that they got another worker!
Floyd is excited to hear that, and it's also you! Floyd always loves teasing you between classes, or even enjoying the small malicious chats with you.
He chats you up a lot on the job, constantly talking to you about how the job can suck, be great, or violent.
Floyd's stories about throwing out rude guests always makes you laugh hard. It doesn't matter if you have a table, you always enjoy a good laugh from him.
Overtime, Floyd shows up to work more when he's schedule to work with you. He know he can lean on you a lot when you're on the clock with him!
He believes you excel most as a waiter. Maybe it's because he slacks off, or he just enjoys the company with you.
Floyd loves how he can gossip about the customers with you. For once, he's not playing too many 'pranks' or teasing you as much.
You just pray he doesn't get bored of you, he might actually pull something... horrible during work.
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Baby Sister
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Hi guys!
This one is from resquets, lot of them actually. I hope you will enjoy this ficlet :)
TW : Jealousy, secret relationship, Reader is Jenni Hermoso's little sister.
PART 2 IS HERE!
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Being Jenni Hermoso’s little sister has always been a great pride for you. You wear your last name with great happiness and you have always attended all the matches you could see. You have never missed any of his important matches, whether with the Barça team or the Spanish national team. This summer, you even made the trip to attend each stage of the competition, until seeing her lift the trophy at the finale.
What happened after and around this victory, you’d rather not talk about. This story makes you green with rage and you sincerely believe that if you had faced these men at the end of the summer, things would have gone very badly.
Jenni now playing in Mexico, it’s obviously harder for you to go and see her play. You watch her evolve on the other side of the ocean thanks to VPN, what you find ridiculous, it’s your sister for God’s sake.
But you’ve been used to long distance relationships for a while now. Because your girlfriend doesn’t happen to live in Barcelona either. Leila has been playing for Manchester City since the summer of 2022, a few months after you two started dating. The long-distance relationship is clearly not something easy to manage, but your reunions are incredible every time. Now that Jenni is no longer in Barcelona, it’s easier for you to fly to Leila for a weekend in Manchester.
Yes, because Jenni obviously doesn’t know that you’re in a relationship with one of her friends. Former colleagues at Barça and in the Spanish national team, there is no need to draw a picture to know how you met. It took some time for you to get closer, you were long persuaded that Leila only saw you as Jenni’s little sister. Baby Hermoso, like most of Jenni’s teammates like to call you.
It’s not a nickname that bothers you, you know it’s affectionate and again it’s not something pejorative for you to be compared to your sister. You love her. Even though she tends to be very protective of you, scaring away all your girlfriends pretty quickly. No one is good enough for you in her eyes and even if you know that her goal is to protect you and to avoid the mistakes that she made herself, you must admit that it’s for this reason that Leila and you decided to remain hidden.
Lying or hiding things from Jenni is really not easy for you. You are used to telling her everything and you have sometimes picked yourself up at the last moment when you want to tell her an anecdote about something you saw or did with Leila. Luckily, you didn’t make any missteps in a year and a half, almost two years.
But the secret is starting to weigh you more and more. Being away from the two most important women in your life is difficult for you and you regularly find yourself with lower morale than usual. When Jenni asks you about it, you just tell her you miss her. Which is true, but not totally. It’s easier for you to talk about it with Leila, even if you don’t want to impose your moods on her.
With Christmas coming, Leila is back in Barcelona, just like your big sister. You managed to establish a schedule in the rules of the art, juggling between family meals and stolen moments with your girlfriend. You even managed to set up an afternoon with Ona, Leila and other friends you have in common. You even asked Alba Putellas to join you, but she already had something planned.
So, when Ona and her brother went back to their parents, Leila offered to take you home, which you obviously accepted. Except she stayed at your place to end the night between lovers, catching up on all the kisses, hugs and love whispers you’re late for. You could spend hours with Leila, hidden under your sheets, exchanging confessions between two kisses.
********
It was between Christmas and New Year’s that Jenni asked you to have lunch and an afternoon with her. If her proposal obviously excited you, you found yourself hesitating when she told you she wanted to invite Leila to join you. It’s been a while since they met again and Leila apparently misses her. And since you two are getting along, Jenni thought it was a good idea to bring people together.
If only she knew how well you two get along…
From the exchange of messages that you had with Leila to talk about this, you realized that the situation seems to amuse your girlfriend more than anything else. It helped you see things in a different light. Maybe there’s no reason to worry, after all?
You’re the last arrived in the restaurant Jenni picked, both brunettes already sitting at a table. You have no trouble spotting them, it would have been difficult to do it anyway with Jenni’s great gestures. You approach Leila to hug her, giving her a stern look when her hand is dangerously low on your hip. Then you put a kiss on your sister’s cheek, which makes you sit next to her before grabbing a lock of your hair.
"Since when do you have red streaks?" laughs your sister
You shrug your shoulders and get rid of your jacket to place it on the back of your chair. The facility is already pretty full and people don’t seem to pay too much attention to your table. A good thing for you.
"Since yesterday"
"It suits her well I think"
Jenni looks at you for a few more seconds before smiling and nodding. Just like her, you have very dark hair, but your eyes are more on gray than on brown like those of Jenni. When you turn your attention to Leila, she winks at you and you find yourself blushing slightly while smiling.
The discussion between the three of you goes rather well in the end and after you go to choose tapas, you relax completely. The laughter burst and you spend a pleasant moment with the two brunettes.
Between two tapas, you grab your phone to open whatsapp and show a message from your mother to Jenni to show that you are right about something. Honestly, you can’t even say why it was, as the subject is quickly forgot when another conversation seems to have caught your big sister’s eye.
"Who is the lion?"
"What?"
You’re trying to quickly put your phone in your jacket pocket, because you know exactly what Jenni is talking about. Instead of saving Leila’s full name, you inserted a lion emoji and an emoji with a burning heart next to it. You find it cuter and it saves you a little today. But not as much as you would have liked.
No doubt thanks to her reflexes worked during training, Jenni managed to grab your phone before you put it away, hurrying to change her hand to get away from you.
"Jenni give it back to me" you half get up and try to take it back.
In front of you two, Leila looks at you with big eyes, without really knowing what to do. Luckily you never call yourself by your first names. And luckily too, you tend to send yourself photos through other apps.
"I miss you, I can’t wait to find you" starts reading Jenni out loud, frowning. "I count the days before I see you again… Who is this girl?"
When Jenni turns to you, you manage to take the phone out of her hands and put it away from her. Your cheeks are so red we could probably bake eggs on them.
"No one" you grunt carrying your glass to your lips.
"Well if that’s nobody, I don’t dare imagine what the messages with your girlfriend are" laughs Leila.
You almost strangle yourself with your drink and Jenni doesn’t seem to blame you to the point of letting you die on the spot since she gives you little pats on the back. On the other hand, you shoot your girlfriend with the look by seeing her drive the nail.
"Do you have a girlfriend?" asks Jenni, eyebrows still frowned.
You sigh softly and hesitate a split second before answering. After all, she doesn’t need to know who it is, right?
"Yes" you simply answer, giving her a look of challenge.
Jenni supports your gaze, obviously, and you feel the questions swirling through her head. You don’t know what you’ll get first.
"Why didn’t you tell me?" your older sister asks.
"Because you drove away all the last ones I’ve been with" you answer, rolling your eyes.
"Oh right away the big words…" sighs Jenni, even if her amused smile proves her guilt.
A few seconds pass and you naively hope that this will be enough for Jenni as information for the moment. Maybe the fact that you’re with Leila will hold her back from pushing things too hard and getting other information out of you.
"How is she?"
It’s Leila’s voice which resounds however and you return once again a dismayed look in her direction. She’s supposed to help you, not the other way around. However, when you answer that it’s not her business, Jenni insists by asking you the question in turn.
"She is kind, she is attentive and understanding" you end up answering, a deeply upset look displayed on the face.
"Is she pretty?" asks Leila
"Obviously" you snort.
In front of you, Leila seems to be having a great time. And if you think that you may laugh about it later, currently you can’t help but think that you intend to make her pay for it later.
"Is she a good kisser?" continues Leila.
"Wow no, I don’t want to hear the answer to that question" Jenni steps in with one hand up. "I can’t believe it, you’re still a baby."
You roll your eyes sighing, hearing the moan in the voice of your big sister. You’re almost eight years apart, but she sometimes has a hard time forgetting that you’ve been fifteen almost ten years ago.
"I’m 25, Jenni" you point out, but this information seems to fall on deaf ears.
"Wait, is that the girl from your job here? Aida?"
"Who is Aida?" asks Leila
This time, the fun left your girlfriend’s voice and face. This makes you shudder from the inside, the main flaw of the brunette being undoubtedly her jealousy. This has already highlighted some tensions between you, but you have always been able to communicate in order to avoid too much conflict.
"It’s nobody" you respond quickly to Leila, to whom you have already mentioned her existence, you are almost sure of it. "And no, it’s not Aida. Can we change the subject now, please?"
Groaning in her beard, Jenni finally accepts your request, even if she specifies that you pay nothing to wait. You roll your eyes again and peck the last crumbs on your plate while Jenni apologizes to go to the toilet.
As soon as she has her heels turned, you feel Leila leaning in your direction.
"Who’s Aida?" asks the brunette again.
You sigh softly and shift your attention to Leila. You’re relieved that your sister went to the bathroom quickly after that, or you know that your girlfriend would have had her blood blown out until you two were alone.
"One of my colleagues Babe, I already told you about it" you answer in a low voice, leaning mechanically too in her direction.
Leila answers nothing, content to look at you at length with her black eyes, arms crossed on her chest. She’s too far away for you to catch her hand, so you try to keep eye contact with her.
"Leila stop, we already discussed it. You have no reason to be jealous"
A few seconds pass during which Leila seems to pass you to the X-ray using her eyes. Time seems to last you a little too long, you end up arching an eyebrow in her direction.
"And excuse me, but if one of them should be jealous, it’s me. You’re the one who’s tactile with all your friends and you’re the one who’s got edits of your person on TikTok. Not me."
You see Leila’s face relaxing under the effect of her surprise. You’ve never mentioned these two things until now and this may not be the best time to do so since your older sister was reappearing next to you two. She seems surprised by your two sulky faces and your similar position, your arms crossed on your chests.
"Uh… is everything okay?" she asks while sitting next to you.
You nod your head while Leila just grunts for a simple answer.
"I have to go." You suddenly decide "See you before you go, right?"
Jenni answers yes, probably a little surprised by your quick departure. She stands up in turn to put a kiss on your cheek and take you in her arms.
"Do you need a ride? Where are you going?"
You know perfectly well that Leila’s question is not innocent but on the other hand the kindness and helpfulness of the brunette alone could explain the proposal. But, on your side, if you had to describe yourself in one flaw, it’s impulsivity. You prefer to talk about spontaneity, but that’s why you find yourself answering her sarcastically
"Seeing Aida, what else?"
The flash of anger and jealousy passing through Leila’s face is very fast, but visible to you. And apparently to Jenni as well.
Still standing, Jenni lets go of a surprise exclamation before pointing at Leila.
"It’s you!"
"Huh?" Leila replies, turning to Jenni, having forgotten for a split second her presence.
"The lion and the burning heart! It’s you!"
"She puts a burning heart next to the lion?"
Leila’s question makes you hit your forehead with your hand. It’s a disaster. She could have responded positively to Jenni’s question that it would have come back to the same thing.
Your sister remains silent for a long time, her gaze passing from Leila to you many times. She opens her mouth several times before finally finding the words that dare to suit her. For your part, your heart rate is so high that you wonder if your heart is not trying to come out of your chest.
"Why didn’t you tell me before?"
You sigh softly, leaning against the bench on which Leila is installed.
"I told you. You traumatized all my last girlfriends Jenni, I’m sure some of them even changed countries after you finished talking to them. I didn’t want this to happen this time."
You feel Leila’s gaze rise on you, you have after all just confided that this relationship is important to you.
"Your ex-girlfriends were selfish first-league idiots" grumbled Jenni rolling her eyes at her turn. "I know Leila isn’t"
You pout a little before shrugging. You’re not sure that if she hadn’t faced the fact her reaction would have been the same. If you had told her about your relationship with Leila when it took place, you are convinced that things would have been different.
"How long has it been?" keeps asking Jenni.
"A year and a half" answers Leila for you.
The information seems to surprise your sister as she bows her eyebrows at you. You mumble an excuse and shrug.
"Well, it doesn’t look like I have a something to say anyway" sighs Jenni as Leila pulls you by the arm to make you sit next to her.
You let yourself be willingly, the revelations of the last minutes making you forget that you managed to argue while Jenni went to the toilet. Jenni sits down again, looking at you carefully, before pointing again at Leila.
"You’re my friend Leila. But I swear to God, if you hurt her, you’re still six feet under."
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azullumi · 9 months
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“are we…” ; kazuha, ayato, alhaitham, & tartaglia
details — here on another agenda of listening to songs, reading the lyrics, realizes how it would sound so good on a fic, and boom! slapping it on a character i think would suit it; basically, songs and tropes as some genshin men
characters — alhaitham, ayato, kazuha, tartaglia (w/gender-neutral reader)
tags — a sprinkle of angst, some of them are out of character, nothing happy is going on (my life relates to it) ; headcanons/scenario
words — 1558
note — getting back to writing so sorry if this fic seems shitty, i’m trying to get my style back by reading the fics i wrote. also i’ll be mostly writing in lowercase now bcs i’m typing on my phone
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waiting ; unrequited love — kazuha (bags by clairo)
“can you see me? i’m waiting for the right time.”
kazuha settles on a boundary between you two, standing close behind it, afraid to take a step and cross. and though he was a man who had no fears and wouldn’t let anything hold him back from attaining what he wants, he was scared of going past the boundary as if he would be treading the path of misery once he chooses to do so.
there is always the urge to touch you, the desire to feel your skin underneath his fingertips and unbeknownst to him, his hand would act on its own—he would reach out, his fingers stopping close to your skin before immediately taking his hand back once the realization of his actions had sunk inside his head: “what is it?” you have asked him upon noticing his actions and he could only shake his head before saying, “there’s something on your hair.”
he has this strong sense of denial whenever he does something for you or says something to you, reasoning the flowers that he gives from time to time as an act of friendship and appreciation or the poetry that he creates with you in mindbut he keeps hidden was just because you were too beautiful to not have your being expressed in words and written in poems—
—and every single day, in each morning that he wakes up, he strongly believes that his feelings for you had already dissipated into thin air as if it never existed in the place but only to see your stupid smile and mesmerizing eyes and having himself fall in love again. oh, the amount of times he convinces and tells himself that he’ll avoid you from then on only to have himself basking in your presence later on: “this is the last time,” he tells himself.
there are only two states he would end up in if he decides to go further the line, without you and with you, and he wasn’t stupid to not know that he’ll only have the former happen to him.
he would rather have you close to him and yearn for you despite being so near than the heartbreak and admiring you afar.
“it’s not like you’re in love with me or anything, right?”
toxic ; unhealthy relationships — alhaitham (cry by cigarettes after sex)
“saying you’d wait for me to stay, i know it hurts you.”
you don’t have a toxic relationship with alhaitham nor did you have a healthy one but instead it was miserable, simply one-sided. however, it wasn’t like that at first, he wasn’t like this at first when you two would decide to start over again and create a fresh new page of your love story only for it to end in the same way.
he was good, was great, was wonderful—was. you don’t even know how it got to this point. how did the gentle and sweet murmurs of love and compliments turn to endless shouting and fights at every chance you two get? alhaitham, despite already having raised his voice at you on several occasions, had never raised his hand at you but nevertheless, it doesn’t make anything less hurtful.
“let’s just stop this, i’m tired,” it was clear, it was obvious that the only solution for this wretchedness was to simply just stop and end everything, to cut yourself off him but it doesn’t seem to happen. alhaitham, who possesses such great knowledge and intelligence to know the answer to nearly every problem, never seems to understand that. moments of begging, of asking for forgiveness, for a chance that you always give him, that you always provide him outright, seemingly served and topped with the syrup of your tears and blood.
he only loves you when he’s about to lose you, you know that. you weren’t blind but perhaps you were dumb with that but he loves you then, right? if he really does love you at those moments, then perhaps he did love you right from the start and he just never realized it—it was an endless cycle of gaslighting and making a fool of yourself, finding the reason and making logic out of his actions and words.
it was hard to lose him, you were too used to his presence always guiding you, helping you, and encouraging you that the moment you lost him, you just never seemed to know anything—like a child that was just taken out of the womb, you knew nothing, even yourself. it was a clear fact that you were nothing without him and without you, he was nothing.
“what happened to us, alhaitham?”
convenience ; arranged marriage w/ one-sided feelings — ayato (you’re losing me by taylor swift)
“i wouldn’t marry me either, a pathological people pleaser.”
it was a marriage of convenience—oh, how you hated the word itself. it feels like a painful slap on your face whenever you hear it being used along with the word marriage, one that would leave a burning mark on your skin.
ayato tried to be a good husband, he tried, really. even when he would come home late, he would always have something to give you. despite not having that many conversations and seldomly seeing each other outside the dining room and bedroom, he would still treat you rather kindly and gently, even when you spend most of your nights alone in a bed that was too large for one, you never felt lonely (perhaps you do, you just don’t want to face it because then you’ll realize that your good husband wasn’t good at all); “i apologize, my dear. here, i bought you something on the way back.”
perhaps all of those acts of kindness and sweetness are his way of saying sorry but what’s there to say sorry for even? was it because he failed to arrive for dinner every time or was it just the whole marriage experience overall?
everything was built on convenience, the only time you two would talk to each other is when it’s needed and the conversation you two will have would end rather shortly and the only time he would touch you in a way that makes you feel loved and cherish—making love—is when it’s convenient for him; you were just never a priority, not anything of importance in his life.
what hurts even more is that ayato isn’t even doing any of this because of a boundary that you two had made but rather there was really nothing in between you two, nothing, not even a speck of dust could be found in the distance you two had.
ayato wasn’t even in a state of turmoil, he wasn’t in a position wherein he had to choose something, to sacrifice, to risk something, it’s just that you were there—you were convenient and not because he chose to choose you over anything else. you were easy to woo, easy to hold, easy to fool.
did he really lose you when he never even wanted you to be his in the first place?
“isn’t this convenient for the both of us?”
pleasure ; one-night stand turned to friends w/ benefits— childe/tartaglia (k. by cigarettes after sex)
“we had made love earlier that day with no strings attached, but i could tell that something had changed how you looked at me then.”
it was simply a relationship that was born out of pleasure; created with the foundation of desire, lust, and need. formed in a single night to escape the reality of the misery of your own lives and consistently being nurtured like a seed that was dropped into the soil and naturally taken care of by the rain and sun—it all seemed natural, him inviting you out for dinner, enjoying your time with his stupid jokes and flirty remarks that is luring you to another night of passion just to wake up with a note and a cold bed the next morning.
and there are times you wish to disappear from his life, to stop whatever you two have, and simply just release yourself from his grasp and though he also wishes for the same, childe always holds onto you so tightly as if he never wants you to leave, as if he always want you to stay even if he knows that he’s hurting you, even if you’re just hurting each other; somewhere deep inside his bones, in the crevices of his mind, he doesn’t wish to see you with someone else other than him despite the fact that he wants you to be happy; “stay with me,” he had told you as he kissed and held you.
but childe was a romantic, he always shower you praised in and out of the bed, he was sweet to you; a gentleman with his words and actions. he was lovely, so breathtaking, so poisonous and it wasn’t hard to love him. and he was well-aware of how your gaze seems to linger at him, how there’s something swirling and drowning in the depths of your eyes, and he was well-aware of what it was. and yet, he chooses to ignore it—was it for the good of himself? for you? either way, he can’t have himself falling.
had you known that night with him would end up in this way, you wouldn’t have taken his rough yet gentle hand on that night.
“what’s there for me to stay for?”
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© azullumi — do not plagiarize, copy, repost, nor translate any of my works.
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savannahsdeath · 6 months
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SOCCER!ELLIE X CHEERLEADER!READER
PART 5FIVE aka; the epilogue
part 4four
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warnings: minors safe !!🩷
writers note: finally the end ugh.. im not gonna lie, i hate how the whole 'series' (its too short to be called a series, but wtv) turned out, so im glad to finish it. though, im looking forward to make another fic with actual plot and not just smut, tho an abby one (i already have the epilogue written and im so so excited🤭)
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you felt stupid. stupid, but mostly hurt. you couldn't understand why a small part of you wanted to believe that vi did nothing wrong. that small part of you wanted to end all of this, get on good terms with vi and be with ellie.
although, you weren't hurt by cheating itself. after all, you thought that's what happened for the past months, so you were already mentally prepared for that.
whatever.
��⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆
you and ellie went through all the usual motions of a happy couple together, though not as an official couple yet. you spent time with each other and your friends, and you slowly forgot about the past and all the drama you had experienced.
you didn't forget about vi, though. you still felt guilty about the way you let her manipulate you like that. you could still hear her voice in your mind, telling you love isn't something you both have and, probably, never had.
you decided she shouldn't be a part of your life anymore, and you did your best to avoid her. she didn't know that you know, though it was obvious, since the rumours continued. you just didn't care anymore. not about her, at least.
ellie didn't speak much about the past, and you didn't either, because you felt like you didn't need to. the past was the past, and now you were looking forward to your future together.
you started thinking less and less about vi, soon managing to get her out of your mind for the whole day. not much, but after what happened, it was a big success. she was no longer a part of your life. ellie was, and that's all that mattered to you now.
you spent more and more time with her. you got to know her team better, returning the favor by taking her to your friend group's meeting.
you told luccy, your best friend, about the whole situation. it took you a good few hours to explain everything.
luccy listened to your entire story, impressed by the twists and turns it took. you could tell she was almost as surprised as you, her eyes widening with each sentence.
"well, no wonder you were so confused," she said politely, "but at least you have ellie now, and you seem happy together." she paused for a moment, before asking; "do you miss vi at all?"
you sighed and closed your eyes, imagining every good moment with her and comparing it to the happiness ellie brought you.
it was almost impossible to answer your friend's question.
on one hand, you had had great moments with vi, and you could even admit that you loved her.
and then there's ellie - which made you remember that your ex wasn't there for you when you needed it.
"no, i don't think so." you replied, ashamedly looking down. "ellie makes me feel like i never even truly loved vi."
────────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────────────
i want to add some 'last words' about this fic, especially this part. a lot of you guys will probably be mad at me for not taking any revenge. but you, as the reader, have to understand that its not that easy. after being so hurt, after hearing so many lies, all you wanted was a normal relationship. a stable, honest and calm one. the one you got with ellie. you knew getting revenge would only complicate things - you probably wont be able to forget her at all once youd put salt on the wounds all over again. just the fact that she has to see you happy with ellie, while shes left alone, is enough. thanks to everyone who supported the series<3
TAGS: @wandasromanova @bellaramslover @aouiaa @glennns-blog @elliewilliamsfuckbuddy @iheartsadiesink @ximtiredx @coff1nn @jowdann @simpforellie @iveofficiallylostmymarbles @skylerwhitwyo @pinkigirl @islalips @ratdungeon @okayyesbutno @dinoastronaut @ucannotcompare @elyonz @lesbiantothemoonandback @lovejuliettq @param8re @r3wbeef and some more i cant tag for unknown reasons:(
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funbirdnest · 1 year
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Blackbird (Translation)
I worked in the translation of the story for the past week and I have been unable to shut up about until now. This translation work was done in collaboration of @spectralpooch who worked as English proofreader and provided a lot of insight of the english grammar and composition. I was also helped by Yuko and Asher who helped with wording.
I hope you get to enjoy, even if just a little, the love we all put in this story that we have been waiting seven years for. 
Blackbird
The fantasy is burning.
—At the end of the day, love always prevails.
—Hard work and good intentions are always rewarded.
—As long as you wish for it with all your might, your dreams will always come true.
Such are the nonsensical, gibberish words that everyone recognizes as downright lies once they reach adulthood. And burning within a bonfire is the pile of papers—the representation of the very innocence of a young boy who earnestly believed in those lies.
The embers of dreams and hopes are stirred by the updraft caused by the hot air.
Ashes and soot soar up, miserably staining the clear skies.
“Aah, what a terrible shame.”
Hibiki Wataru looked up at the sky and, in sharp contrast to his words, trembled with pleasure.
He is a beautiful man.
Long, silver-white hair that resembles moonlight incarnate. A physique blessed with a perfect golden ratio.
He is wearing his elegantly designed uniform in quite an incomprehensible way.
His facial expressions and gestures are refined and effusively charming, and it feels as though wing scales and fluorescent lights should flutter around him with every step he takes.
But it is precisely because he is too beautiful that he can stand out in any town.
Every person who passes by throws him a strange look and either turns away or flees the scene as if having just encountered a monster. It is the most appropriate reaction when confronted with a monstrosity, but—
He wants them to at least scream.
To curse, spit, and throw stones at him.
It hurts the most to be ignored.
As if to convey this point, Wataru gestures towards them in invitation to do so—but the only one willing to approach him is a slightly dirtied pigeon.
"Aah, Gil! Poor you, Gilles de Rais¹! Your feathers are completely sullied!" 
Wataru laments while rubbing his cheek against the pigeon perched on his shoulder.
"When you are covered in soot like this, you look more like a crow than a pigeon! Crows are really smart, and they can become great ‘entertainers’ when trained, but people often hate them for no reason—it's troublesome, isn't it?"
At the sight of Wataru having a conversation with a pigeon as though it were completely normal, the people around him begin to back further away.
"... But right now, I have the feeling that such an individual would be the most suitable companion for me."
As Wataru mutters sadly to himself, the soot-covered pigeon pulls his hair with its beak.
“That hurts?! It was just a joke, Gil! Are you jealous? I've raised and looked after you since you were an egg, so there's no way I could ever discard you and look for another partner! Please cheer up—oya?”
As the pigeon goes all out on him, something falls down from the crevice of its beak. 
Cinders.
The wreckage of a dream that had been carried by the wind from afar.
“That's splendid! This will solve the problem of my ink running out!”
Wataru exclaims with pleasure and mashes the cinders with his fingertips.
Then, with fingers stained in black, he writes his name in the bundle of documents that he had been holding.
“—With this, it’s finished.”
Embracing the bundle of documents as though it were his most prized possession, Wataru trembles again.
“I wonder if he will be happy with this.”
***
There was a war.
A tragic conflict in which boys hurt and killed each other for the sake of their own dreams and ideals—for the sake of love.
Of course, although it has now become a gloomy and sorrowful memory, it was not actually a battle where people fought with guns and blades and bathed in each other's blood.
All of them were idols.
Standing on the stage, singing and dancing, their top priority was to bring people happiness.
However, at that time, their place of residence, Yumenosaki Private Academy, was not an environment in which idols could properly live as idols. Everything was decayed, stagnant and rotten.
There were those who stood up in order to change the situation at hand.
There were also those who tried to fight back in anger and sorrow after everything they held dear had been mangled in the name of the "revolution" the others had raised.
They turned the things that were supposed to make people happy into weapons, abused them, and imposed their own resentment and misery onto others.
As a result, this vast and boundless world was changed only slightly.
But the price that had been paid was extremely high.
—Yumenosaki 's era of conflict.
—The first revolution.
—The beginning of the end.
Regret consumes everyone whenever they remember the tragedy of that time.
***
A hospital room.
The brand new hospital in the vicinity of Yumenosaki Academy had been built with a sole purpose: to provide an immediate response on the occasion that a single person's physical condition changed for the worse.
Leading-edge medical equipment and top-notch doctors had been assembled in order to forcibly prolong his existence—sometimes even diverting attention from other, more urgent patients.
He is one of the world's most distinguished billionaires, the scion of the Tenshouin conglomerate, Tenshouin Eichi.
He is the leading actor in the conflict that unfolded in Yumenosaki.
He loved idols more than anyone else.
However, as a result of the kingcraft instilled in him from an early age by his private corporate tutor, the clear mind he has naturally possessed since birth, and his cold heart, he came to massacre the very thing he loved with his own hands.
The many sins he committed in this ironic twist of fate tormented him and made him sick.
“...”
Tenshouin Eichi is lying down on the floor of a very spacious hospital room.
He is also a beautiful man, but there is a crack distorting his beauty.
Seemingly because he hasn’t been eating, he has become emaciated, and his blond hair, which resembles sunlight incarnate², is disheveled and dull. His hospital clothes, composed of high-quality material, are completely wrinkled and dirtied.
Like a baby bird that fell from its nest.
He had ripped off the intravenous drips and other pieces of medical equipment designed to keep him alive and smashed them to pieces.
There were doctors who genuinely cared for Eichi's well-being and those whose interest in treating him stemmed only from professional duty—Eichi shunned them all equally with curses and threats.
—I don’t want to live anymore.
—So, please, don’t treat me.
—Someone like me doesn’t deserve to live.
“No.”
Eichi, withering and on the verge of death, hears a voice reply to the soliloquy he hadn't expected anyone to hear.
There is only a single small window in the room. No matter how hard one might try to contort their body, it would be impossible to enter through—regardless, it was from that very window that Hibiki Wataru's towering silhouette soundlessly entered. 
It is like a dream.
As if it were a magic trick, he suddenly materializes.
“—It's you. Hibiki Wataru of The Five Eccentrics.”
"That story has already concluded, so will you please stop referring to me that way?"
As he casually replies to Eichi, who had spoken as though in a trance, Wataru strides across the hospital room.
He steps over the countless broken pieces of wreckage scattered across the floor, but never breaks anything.
“Let's readjust our mindset! Now, while we still have the chance to bask in the success of our stage performances, let's sit back and recharge our batteries! That is our duty, Tenshouin Eichi-kun!"
“Just what the hell are you doing here?”
Eichi mutters reproachfully, glaring up at Wataru with cruel eyes.
“Did you come to mock me because I thought I was victorious but wound up losing everything?”
Presumably too prideful to continue behaving in an undignified manner, Eichi staggers to his feet and then takes a seat on the mattress.
Having refused even the cleaning staff, this dirty hospital bed is now his only throne.
“Or do you intend to seek vengeance on behalf of your fellow Five Eccentrics?”
“No, not at all? Although there were some underwhelming parts, you still persevered and accomplished great things atop the stage! You have my praises. I have no reason to make fun of you!”
Wataru continues, his tone cheerful. Scattered, multicolored petals surround a broken flower vase—he gathers them up, grasps them in one hand, and opens his palm to reveal a single perfect flower.
"Besides, my beloved friends, The Five Eccentrics, were not actually killed. They're not that fragile, so I ask that you do not disparage them."
Though his eyes flash with hostility for a single instant, Wataru hides it with the ease of putting on a mask.
“Shu is slowly recovering his strength in the comfort of his dolls and the mutual love they share. Kanata, too, is embarking on a new life together with the inexperienced hero who saved his heart. And, of course, Our Majesty, the Demon King, Rei, too—indeed, someone like him will never die, even if he's killed.”
As he mentions each of the remarkable members of The Five Eccentrics, Wataru smiles.
“And the youngest sibling whom we risked our lives to protect, Natsume-kun, doesn't have a single scar. He quickly found the bluebird you set free, and is venturing forth into his life—not as a member of The Five Eccentrics, but as a human and idol.”
"...They're so strong. Everyone, all of them, are strong and splendid human beings worthy of respect—unlike me. Hiyori-kun and Nagisa-kun, too. It appears that they’ve already begun to move on to their next stage."
Looking somewhat astonished, Eichi hangs his head like a confused lost child.
“Am I really the only one who can’t move? At the end of Yumenosaki's conflict, or the saga chronicling the subjugation of The Five Eccentrics, am I truly the only loser?”
“No, no. I feel the same way. It's embarrassing to admit, but—I don't know what I should do next.”
With a dumbfounded expression that mirrors Eichi's, Wataru fidgets with the flower with his black-stained fingers.
“I'm quite satisfied with how things concluded on that most wonderful stage, even though we had to settle for the second-best result—but I'm at a bit of a loss, as I have no further plans for the future.”
"I see. Would you like me to apologize? By casting you in the role of the villain, a symbol deserving of ridicule and disdain, I turned you into the target of everyone's malice."
“Yes. Thanks to you, no one trusts me enough to work with me, so all of my future plans are now uncertain. I suppose I could arrange a stage and enact a story of my own choosing, but… A one-man show would be a little lonely, wouldn't it?”
"I thought that you would always be happy to stand onstage no matter what—even alone."
“Regrettably, I'm an entertainer whose only purpose is to make others happy. If I were to stand onstage all by myself, I would lose all motivation.”
With a shrug of his shoulders, Wataru quietly offers Eichi the flower.
”And so, I thought I would ask you, the organizer of the most satisfying stage I have ever stood upon, for another commission. That's the reason I came today. Of course, I am also here to visit the sick."
“Was that sarcasm? I humiliated and denigrated you and your beloved friends. I trampled on and killed all of you for the sake of my own dream.”
“No one is dead, Eichi-kun. Everything that took place is just a story.”
”Are you really going to behave like a sore loser and pretend like you all weren't actually hurt?”
"No. If I were to hold a grudge and get angry at you, it would be an insult to my friends' extraordinary performance in their roles as villains. That's why I won't give you the pleasure of my vengeance.”
“I don’t understand your reasoning.”
“It’s a mystery to me too. This is the first time in my life that I have ever felt this alive. It's as though something I cannot quite comprehend is stirring inside me.”
Wataru speaks with an innocent, puzzled expression on his face, as though he were a child who had just tripped for the very first time in his life.
***
“Oops. I went off on a tangent just now, but I meant to give you this gift earlier.”
Suddenly coming to his senses, Wataru quietly hands Eichi the flower in his hand.
The instant that the flower touches Eichi's fingertips, it transforms into a bundle of documents.
It’s just like magic.
“... Oh, my goodness. As always, your magic tricks are beyond comparison, Hibiki-kun.”
“You and I are not particularly close, so don't blurt out things like that as if you know me.”
“I’ve always been watching you.”
Eichi speaks honestly, seemingly too tired to maintain a strong front. He proceeds to look over the bundle of papers.
His expression dawns with astonishment.
“This is—”
“Fufufu. This is the pipe dream³ written by our beloved younger brother and only son, Natsume-kun. He poured all of his heart and soul into it.”
Wataru explains, satisfied with the surprised expression on Eichi's face.
“This is a scenario envisioning a way in which we, The Five Eccentrics, could have achieved victory over you in our final battle the other day.”
“Oh, that's right, just before the decisive battle, you and the other Five Eccentrics had some kind of exchange. I was preoccupied with other matters at the time, so I didn't pay much attention to what all of you were up to.”
Deeply immersed in reading, Eichi flips through the stack of documents carefully. A grin slowly begins to form on his lips.
“Fufu. So cute; it’s really like a fantasy story. ‘I don't want my beloved Five Eccentrics to lose. I want us to have a happy ending where no one has to be sacrificed—’”
"Indeed. He filled the pages with such impossible fantasies and impractical delusions."
“... It was only by defeating you on that stage that we somehow managed to settle things in a conclusive way. If the five of you had won that day, we would still be enmeshed in the middle of an unending conflict.”
"Exactly. I anticipated as much, which is why I was unable to accept this. This present, packed with that child's—with Natsume-kun's—dreams, expectations, and love.”
“And, because we followed the premeditated arrangement, everything went smoothly.”
“That's true. But, just as one would expect from a story desperately written by our beloved child... It's very compelling, isn't it? It'd be heartless to ignore it altogether and just throw it away.”
Wataru gently caresses the pile of documents as if consoling a little baby.
“And that's why I quickly examined the contents, committed them to memory, and secretly copied them. Only moments ago, Natsume-kun burned the original copy himself, so—that child's fantasy should, by all accounts, have been completely erased from this earth.”
Wataru laughs like a naughty child who just successfully carried out a prank.
“Everyone will assume so. And even though this is an imitation, the contents are extremely close to the real thing. No, rather, the contents are only the things that I chose to resurrect in accordance with my own preferences.”
“Hmph. But there's no way you can actually use this, right? It's just a bunch of delusions with no grounding in reality. In other words: worthless garbage. It's nothing more than a work of fiction that fabricates convenient plots for foolish readers who yearn to avert their eyes from this harsh reality.”
Eichi drops the pile of documents onto the dirty bed and sneers at it.
“It has no bearing on the real world. Those kinds of stories only exist in the minds of idealistic writers. It's not the real thing. It's not reality.”
“Right. And so, I'd like to ask you, with your firm grasp on reality, to please rework it.”
“...?”
“You're hospitalized, so you have a lot of free time, correct?”
Wataru smiles, carefully gathering up the documents Eichi dropped one by one.
“Please use that spare time to improve upon this document. And adapt it into a new story in which The Five Eccentrics, your opponents, achieve victory.”
“What would be the point of doing such a thing?”
“You must be prepared for anything the future decides to throw your way, no matter how incredibly low the chances of it actually occurring may be. You know this better than anyone, but you were born with a fragile constitution, so—you could die at any time.”
“...You're right. And now that I've lost my will to live, I'm even refusing treatment.”
“And if you, the main character of this story, were to die and abruptly, nonsensically disappear from the narrative, the entire plot would collapse.”
“.....”
"Do you understand what I mean, Eichi-kun?"
“I understand, Hibiki-kun.”
Eichi's eyes, as cloudy as a corpse's, begin to sparkle.
“I have a responsibility. A responsibility as a protagonist—as an author. I have to be prepared for when my character dies and vanishes from this world—from the story.”
"Yes. However, you don't strike me as an expert storyteller, so I thought it'd be convenient to use something as a basis—for the story. This pipe dream written by Natsume-kun is quite suitable in terms of both content and quality, right?”
“That's right. It's the story that the child prodigy, the youngest member of The Five Eccentrics, wove out of his own life force.”
This time, Eichi doesn’t sneer sarcastically. As he praises his enemy, an honest smile appears on his face.
“Thank you, Hibiki-kun. Since this is a story founded on the premise of my imminent death, I can't let Keito, who hates the thought of me dying more than anyone else, write it.”
Eichi's eyes widen, surprised at the deep affection with which he spoke these words.
He'd assumed he'd lost everything. And yet—is he only now remembering that there are still things worth loving?
“I'll write it. To ensure the story will continue after I'm gone.”
Growing more and more energetic, Eichi stains his fingers with the filth splattered across his bed and begins to scrawl on the back of the stack of documents. His handwriting is so sluggish and messy that no one besides him could possibly read it.
“First of all, let's ensure that I get defeated while I'm still alive. After bringing down The Five Eccentrics and seizing control of everything, I become a power-crazed tyrant. And so, a new generation of heroes stands up to defeat me. It could be Natsume-kun, the surviving member of The Five Eccentrics, or someone else.”
“Yes ♪ And then? What will happen next in this story?”
“It's not enough to merely change the person in power. The masses themselves should mobilize and take action into their own hands to improve the world. Yes, the next step is the people's revolution. That's why... errr... aaahh—”
Eichi is so absorbed in the moment that he scatters the documents. He clutches his head with both hands.
“I can’t work through my thoughts! I'm not a genius, so this is really hard for me! Aah, this is pathetic, and I have no right to ask this of you, but—Can you help me come up with more ideas, Hibiki-kun?”
“Yes, with pleasure ♪ I also have some time to spare, after all!”
Wataru sits on the bed and happily gazes at Eichi, who has become entirely absorbed in the act of weaving⁴ the beginnings of a new story.
“I look forward to seeing what sort of stage I'll stand on next. Aah, in both my past and present, this has always been my only source of happiness.”
“I'm out of paper! I also want something to write with! Hibiki-kun, isn't there somewhere nearby where you could buy some?”
“Yes, yes. Aren't you supposed to be my fan? Are you sure you should be bossing me around like this?”
With a smile that seems to say, Well, it doesn't really matter, Wataru shifts like a bird about to take flight.
“Come on, let's celebrate, let's weave, let's create—a story! In this second iteration, the tragedy will become a comedy! Yes, I'm certain that this next work will be a very enjoyable story!”
“Enough, enough! Stop saying unnecessary things and just hurry up! Before life leaves my body!”
“Yes, yes. You really know how to put people to work, Mr. Author... ♪”
………
And so, Hibiki Wataru chose to assist Tenshouin Eichi in the creation of his story.
Together, they supported one another, engaged in heated debates, and envisioned the future.
It was at the end of that gloomy winter when the two of them, now fine, the rulers of Yumenosaki Academy, were defeated by the revolutionaries of Trickstar.
It was a season when the seeds carried by dirty, exhausted birds finally bloomed into flowers.
1. Gilles de Rais was a leader of the French army and participated in the Hundred Years’ War alongside Jeanne d’Arc as a companion of arms. Later in his life he went on to become a serial killer of children and was condemned to death and hanged. 
In the story “Cinderella on the Stake's Stage,” it’s revealed that Wataru also has a pigeon called “Jeanne d’Arc.”
2. Akira describes Eichi’s hair as “陽光を固めたような” = “As if sunlight has taken physical shape”. Likewise this is also the way he describes Wataru’s hair “月光を固めたような” = “As if moonlight has taken physical shape”.
3. We chose to interchange the words pipe dream and fantasy through the story but they often refer to the same script Natsume wrote.
4. Weaving reads as “Tsumugi” here.
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lightwing-s · 1 year
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batboys as words, as per my own thoughts and perception
A few days back, @igotanidea asked me to describe the bat boys in one word. I got way over my head and ended up writing full on paragraphs on what reminds me the most about them, and what energy I get from the limited knowledge I have of all of them. So I tuned this into a post to fill the emptiness I left this tumblr on and to prepare you for stories to come (yes, Jason x villain!reader is finally coming)
picture © lomlisyou on pintrest
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To me, if there’s one word, one thing, that could describe Dick Grayson pretty well, it’s sun. He is like the sun in the sense that he brings life into everything and everyone he touches. He’s a believer in people, in the best we all have in store, and he has a way of making them believe in themselves, in their skills and abilities, making them see the greatness they didn’t notice they owned. He’s a leader, and a great one at that. Although not much of a jokester, he can bring happiness and a smile on people’s faces. He carries a lot on his shoulders, from being the very first Robin to leading the Titans and replacing the Batman, but his heart is too pure and he wants to help people nonetheless, so he keeps taking more responsibilities just so he can assist those he cares for. I’d imagine his love language are acts of service, doing what he can to make his loved one comfortable and happy. In a few words, he’s warmth, silliness, he’s flirting for fun, he IS fun, he’s sugar, spice and everything there is of nice.
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If I could describe Jason with one word it would be… caring. Out of all the boys, and out of everything he went through in life, he strikes me as the most protective, the one who will always make sure if you’re alright, if you’re safe, if you’ve been taking your pills or not skipping meals. I know we usually relate him to this aggressive vigilante form, but that’s the Red Hood, not Jason. Jason? Jason is the sweetest, most loving person you’ll find out there. He lost his family and the guy who took him in wasn’t affectionate at all, and he also went through so much. He just wants to protect and feel protected, hence I give him the words care, affection, protection, subtlety. He’s a well stored, well locked, box of surprises, that I’m sure whoever gets to open will feel a love they never had before.
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I don't understand as much about Tim as I do his brothers, but from my limited knowledge I think of him as someone who thinks about the details. He’s the guy who, even though you’d never take his aloof mannerisms for that, remembers every small thing you ever told him. Or notices every gentle habit, tick, or whatever it is you have. He’s observant and with that he’ll learn everything there is about you without you needing to tell him a word. He’ll gift you with that thing you spent a millisecond more than usual staring at when you hung out at the mall, or he’ll cook (more like order) that dessert that had you sighting slightly heavier than normal. He is attention, he is detailing, he’s watching the ones you love like the most addicting tv show. He is subtle touches, surprise gifts, random music concerts just because he knows you have that one song hidden on your playlist. He is noticing things not even you, not even your reflection, saw in yourself.
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To define Damian in a few words is a bit hard to me, as he’s still young and is still learning about life, developing his own ideals and personality. Hence, having this in mind, to me he is represented best by time. Time to grow, time to heal, time to learn. He is also space. The space he needed to understand his place in the world after leaving the League of Assassins, his mother and grandfather, and joining his dad and his mission for good in Gotham. He’s time and patience to allow all of those things to happen. Not only time for him, but to those he cares for. I feel like he won’t be one to always be on your feet to make sure you’re okay, but that he’ll let you have your time to yourself, rest and put your head into place when you’ve been having stressful days or just don’t feel alright. He’ll only show up after you’ve had your moment, perhaps with food and beverages. He’s quiet kindness, he’s healing, he’s fixing everything even if it takes time. He’s resistance, endurance, fortitude. Overall, he is like a watch, always running, never stopping, but always giving everyone time.
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lurkingshan · 5 months
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Okay now that Halloween is over and my head is clearer, I wanted to add some thoughts to the great posts @waitmyturtles and @bengiyo shared debriefing Only Friends and unpacking this desire by some in fandom to declare that it has no message and therefore we can't be upset with the creators for what they chose to put out into the world via this show. Let me just say upfront: I find that claim preposterous and completely contra the basic tenets of media literacy and analysis.
Turtles already gave a great overview of the foundational truth here: media is communication, and all communication contains messages, both explicit and implicit. For the first 11 weeks, I believed that Only Friends was attempting to take a neutral POV on its characters' morality, asking us instead to think for ourselves about the moral complexities and implicit messages of the situations the characters were in, and wondered if the lack of a very explicit perspective from the show was making folks uncomfortable. But then, in the final hour, the show shifted its tone to provide an extremely explicit POV on the characters and its themes (with the subtlety of a sledgehammer to the head), with a heavy focus on punishing Boston, and that POV was so rooted in heteronormativity, sex shaming, and frankly, anti-queer sentiment, that it took many of us aback. As Ben put it so succinctly in his post: NOT A SLAY.
I want to unpack this more because it’s important to understand that there are ways to write the events of the final episode as essentially the same without embedding that explicit moralistic POV. If the intent was to maintain a neutral presentation of events that does not cast judgment on Boston, you would not do any of the following:
Have several characters explicitly judge Boston for being a non-monogamous slut in dialogue with no counterpoint voices
Make Boston spend the episode apologizing to every character while receiving no apologies in return for the wrongs done to him
Insert a random episode of Boston acting on impulse in a way that is not actually consistent with any of his previous behavior to make a sudden point that he can't change
Have Nick, who has been explicitly singled out as the one person who understands and loves Boston, change his mind and dump him in a frankly condescending way while Boston begs him for another chance
End Boston's final scene of the show with him devastated, alone, and defeated while the rest of the characters are happy and thriving
There is absolutely nothing neutral about those choices, fam. And they were in fact choices that the creators of this show are responsible for. They could have had the basic events of the finale stay the same, but changed the dialogue and framing of these interactions, and it would have completely changed the message being sent. For instance:
Instead of having Sand say Nick deserves better than Boston because Boston kissed someone else, he could have focused his comments on helping Nick understand whether he wants monogamy and why
Instead of having Boston grovel to everyone, they could have had all the friends just decide to forgive and forget all their mutual trespasses, or had the rest offer Boston sincere apologies in response to his own
Instead of Boston randomly deciding to make out with Boeing and lie about it, they could have had him invite Boeing to meet Nick for a threesome and have Nick react to that
Instead of having Nick dump Boston, they could have had them mutually decide they want different things and decide to part ways
Instead of Boston crying and dejected on the concrete, we could have seen him say goodbye to Nick on positive terms and walk away with his head held high to the life waiting for him in NYC where he can be his authentic self
Do you see how that works? All of the events of the story are the same, but the message it delivers is completely different. This version of the story would tell us that even though Boston's current friends don't really get him, and even though Nick is not ultimately comfortable with an open relationship, there is nothing inherently wrong with the way Boston wants to live. But they didn't give us this version; they gave us the stigmatizing and shaming one I described above. And that is absolutely something we should hold the creators responsible for, even if it makes us feel some kind of way about our drama heroes.
I have been giving this show the benefit of the doubt for weeks because I had a lot of faith in Jojo and Ninew not to put art out into the world with such a terrible message, a faith that was rooted in their previous work, including Gay OK Bangkok, 3 Will Be Free, and The Warp Effect, all of which featured queer ensembles and strong sex positive messaging. But no creator is infallible and mistakes were made. We will never know how much of the final messages in Only Friends were intentional versus a result of sloppy and rushed storytelling, or how much was the creators’ original vision versus studio interference, but ultimately it doesn't matter. We have to deal with the show we got, and we should be putting a critical eye on the people who delivered it to us. I know I will not be going into any future Jojo/Ninew shows with the same kind of faith, and I will not be pretending this one wasn’t a huge letdown from these creators.
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aka-libby · 9 months
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Counting Our Regrets
Aki Hayakawa x gn!reader | established relationship | semi-canon  [ domestic tooth rotting!fluff + angst (with happy ending/comfort) ]
Word count: 4.3k
Warning(s): mentions/implied topic of de*th, insecurities about love, VERY BRIEF mentions about rough past regarding home life
Summary: Aki hated you at first but after a series of events his view on you changed. Now you’re together as a couple, with the regrets of wasting all that time hating and being avoidant of the inevitable spark you had. Yet even with these regrets on the both of you, it’s when you’re in his apartment having dinner like any other night that he finally realized how he truly feels about you.
A/N: So I have a story in the WIP folder that explains their past and how they became the couple here in this fic. There is a LOT to unfold and it’s honestly a drain to write angst and pain all the time SOOOOO I would write this fic when I’m bored and somehow I finish this one first…. so now here we are. I do hope it’s not confusing but hints enough context for readers to understand the development of the two. Plus I’m WAYYYYY too impatient to wait to post this cause I’m so PROUD OF IT UGH.
Anyways enjoy.
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“Is it weird that I still get a bit nervous every time he invites me over for dinner?”
Your friend laughs over the phone. “Really?! It’s been so long now. Just breathe and treat it like any other time you guys are together.”
You’re glaring at them, even though they can’t see it. “I’m serious. You know how the past was, we hated each other… well he hated me. I don’t blame him though, it was in every way my fault for how things are but… still.” 
Your friend probably heard the change in your tone towards the end. The mischievous aura drips from them. “I understand but the situation has changed now. You stopped being a lil brat and he realized the amazing person that you are underneath it. He fell for you instantly, I see it and am reminded of it everyday when I see you two in the same room.”
“Really?” You are curious now about what they meant. “What do you mean?”
“You don’t see it?” The utter disbelief from their tone surprises you more. “The way he looks at you speaks millions. Like a moth lured to a bright ass light. I believe it.”
You smile as your chest lightens from the doubts slipping off you. Their words really eased your mind. “That’s… cute.” Images of Aki flash in your mind of all the times he would get embarrassed when caught showing any form of affection. “He’s really sweet.”
“He is and it is cute but also utterly revolting.” They gag through the phone. “You two are so lovesick for one another and yet SOOOO oblivious at the same time. My eyes get cavities from seeing you two within the same radius.”
The both of you chuckle a bit before they bids their farewell. “Now go in and enjoy the dinner, okay? Tell me more about it later.”
“I will. See you soon.” You say before ending the call.
The grip on the plastic bags you have to your side tightens as you take a deep breath in and out. You know more than anyone this night will be just like any other night. Just a casual dinner with 2 co-workers/friends and your boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
Your lips form into a soft smile as the title lingers in your head. It feels too surreal to be together now after a year of discord between you and Aki. Then a time period of uncertainty of what kind of relationship you guys had. It was the result of the change with his thoughts about you and your thoughts about life. With Himeno’s death being the catalyst to it all.
It doesn’t help that both of you have gone through great suffering revolving around death. Life is unfair to both of you. His family was taken away so suddenly by a worldwide Devil attack while yours…
Agh, the thought hurts too much to think about.
Even with all the hurt, pain, and self projecting in denial of the truth of it all you two somehow ended up here, together. It made you happy to realize that after so long but so late. With time still ticking every single second, it’s only sooner than later that both your lives could end so suddenly.
With Aki’s time limit down to 2 years and yours still in the air, anything could happen at any moment. It was hard carrying the regret of projecting your trauma and fear of abandonment to the relationships around you. How you pushed others away to protect them and yourself. It wasn’t fair to you or your comrades.
They never got to meet the real you.
Your thoughts are cut from the feral screech coming from behind Aki’s door. You know all too well who it was, and you smile softly from the moment, as it reminds you to be present in the present. No time to dwell on your regrets, it will only waste more of your limited time.
You are with Aki now, that’s all that matters.
Finally, you take the last few steps over to Aki’s door. Knuckles barely hovering over the door before it’s busted open.
Power cheers out your name as she pulls you in for a half hug, arm over your shoulder. Her eyes don’t meet yours, instead they’re on the bags at your sides. “You brought food for me?! I'm STARVIN.” 
“Hey!” a familiar voice echoes from inside. “That’s no way to treat guests!”
Power is quick to nag back at him with a roll of her eyes before taking the bags out of your hands. “Allow me!” She excitedly offers but you know there are other intentions behind her kindness. Your head shakes from her obvious facade.
Walking into the Hayakawa Residence, you instantly envelop yourself in the comforting feeling of your second home. The smell of the three housemates and the aroma of home cooked food wafts into your nose causing your previous insecurities to flee. Is this what it's like to be at ease? You’re pretty sure it is by how safe you feel once the door closes behind you.
Turning around the corner, you see Aki casually stirring a mixture of veggies in a savory sauce in a wok. It instantly waters your mouth. “Hi Love.” You greet walking over to where he is in front of the stovetop.
It was then you realize what your friend’s comment meant earlier, about how Aki looks at you. His eyes instantly shine with adoration and his body is fully turned towards you, letting go of whatever he was focused on to meet you halfway. Once you’re within his grasp, he pulls you into a hug and kisses the top of your head.
“Hello love, was the trip here okay? I’m sorry I couldn’t pick you up.” He apologizes before rubbing your back soothingly.
Shaking your head to look up, you reassure him with a smile. “It’s fine, don't worry. I can’t expect you to always pick me up and host a dinner.”
“I know but I would rather do it knowing you are safe than for you to take a taxi or walk here.” He tells you softly with his arms now draped over waist, his hands interlocked behind you. Blue eyes still looking at you. “Next time I’ll open my schedule up to do so.”
You instantly shake your head. “No, you’ve done too much for me.”
He looks at you softly, almost bittersweetly. “It feels like I haven’t done enough.”
Your lips are already on his nose before he could continue. “You’re perfect.”
Those insecurities leave him and it’s replaced by the previous admiration he first had when you walked into his field of view. Instead of replying, he just pulls you in for another tight hug, his cheek now on top of your head. His indirect way of saying many things with one action.
You mean the world to me.
I appreciate you.
Thank you.
Pulling back from the hug to check up on the veggies he was stirring earlier, you point towards the living room, where Power and Denji lay as they go through the plastic bag you brought. “I hope you don’t mind but I brought some extra food I prepared yesterday and sweets.”
“Mmm you didn’t have to. I made extra food too.” He explains as he tosses the veggies around the sauce, evenly coating each cut piece. “But I do appreciate it, thank you love.”
I smile and wrap an arm around his torso. “I don’t mind. It was going to rot in my fridge anyways with how often I eat here. Plus, you have 2 extra mouths to feed.” 
His soft eyes gloss over to you, and he can’t help but feel the need to kiss the side of your head. “You’re the best.”
“Oi! Can you cook faster and stop flirting so much!” I hear Denji yell from across the place. Aki’s soft feature forms a frown as he goes to scold Denji for interrupting the moment.
Just now remembering you had more people in the room, you walk off to where the other two reside. Both are already munching on the baked goods you’ve brought, happily enjoying it while watching their show.
“Like em?” You ask Denji as you sit down next to Power. Her cat senses your presence, immediately heading over to you, purring happily under your loving touches. “Hi cutie.” 
Without taking his eyes off the screen, he replies back with his mouth stuffed. “Therwe realu-
“Don’t talk with your mouth full!” Aki scolds from the kitchen.
“Whamever.” He dismisses but gulps it down anyways before continuing. “Good ass…” He draws a blank. You watch the way the gears in his mind slowly rotate as they try to put together a coherent sentence. “Good ass goods!”
Power slams her hand flat onto his back, repeatedly slapping him, and causes poor Denji to choke mid consumption of the said goods. Her boisterous laugh echoes within their flat. “You sound more stupid than usual!” She hollers out then starts shaking him.
He starts to cough from all the sudden movements and finally dryly swallows the food. Despite watching Denji almost choke, you can’t help but laugh from watching the events unfold. They really were siblings by heart.
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As the conversation slowly dies, Aki takes this opportunity to step outside to smoke. Everyone sits comfortably in the ambience. With the sound of the Tokyo nightlife and the lowered volume of the TV playing some random channel, it really lured everyone to a relaxed state of mind.
It could be the combination of good food and it being quite late into the night that caused both Denji and Power to pass out on the ground. Your buzzy self smiles at the sight of them, so peaceful from the food coma. The whole environment feels so… nice.
It was somewhat odd for you. Your body is aware of the empty space where your walls and guard used to be. Not really used to this feeling of being safe and secure. Growing up in a chaotic and unstable household really puts a toll on you and your point of view on what a safe home should make you feel.
In a way, you never really felt at “home” before.
The silence you’re used to in your own apartment isn’t much different compared to what you’re currently experiencing now, but it makes you feel different. You don’t feel lonely or alienated. You feel…. comfortable. You’re not sure if it’s the alcohol or the fact you are now just appreciating what a domestic life is like, but it’s a new foreign feeling. Nonetheless, it’s not unwelcome, it’s more than welcome.
You hope this doesn’t come to an end anytime soon.
Taking in a sip of the alcohol of your choice, your eyes pick up on the mess that surrounds you. Dirty plates, unfinished platters of food, both used and unused napkins sprawled over the table. Overall it was just messy, but honestly this is what's expected from a late night dinner with Power and Denji involved.
Without another thought, you stood up with your wobbly tipsy legs and started to clean up. Picking up the empty cans and garbage as you scout the room for more.
“Hey.” Aki calls out for you, head just barely poking into the apartment.
You look up at him, an empty beer can in hand. “Hey.” You greet, confused.
His brows lowered from your response. “I wasn’t saying hi. What’re you doing?”
“Oh.” A giggle escapes from your lips from your tipsy brain. You continue to pick up the beer cans and toss them into the recycling bag. “Cleaning up.” You answer simply.
“You’re a guest.” He starts off walking towards you and takes the bag. “You should be relaxing.”
“You hosted this Aki, in your own home. The least I can do is help clean up just a bit.” You explain then immediately start to stack all the dirty dishes. “How about you get the garbage and I’ll do the dishes. Hm? How does that sound?” 
Leaving no room for him to argue further, you leave the living room and head to the kitchen. Aki watches as you walk away happily with the stack of dishes in hand. You look over to him once, an eyebrow raised from his stare.
“What?” You ask as you hold a soapy dish sponge in one hand and a dirty plate in the other, scrubbing away the grim and food off the plates one by one.
A lot of thoughts are running through his mind but he makes no attempt to show it. He just shrugs and chuckles. “Nothing.”
Both of you fall back into comfortable silence. Only breaking it to drop a couple of small talk here and there. With the TV still running in the back, now on the news channel. You make notes on a few topics the news anchor mentions and Aki does the same, feeling comfortable with the surface level talks. 
Nothing about this was new to either of you. You always offer freely to clean up when invited over and Aki follows up by refusing you from doing so. A routine both of you are accustomed to for the past couple of months. In some way, you should feel content or happy being with someone who flows with you so easily and has grown accustomed to you over time.
But as your thoughts simmer a bit longer, a bitter side to all of this comes around. You’re reminded of the reality you’re truly in. Both you and Aki’s death are determined when you both sign your life away to Public Safety. With Aki being two years left and yours possibly just as short.
The unwavering and daunting feeling never goes away and always ruins moments like these you want to cherish and really be in, to really exist in. No matter how much you try to avoid it, the feeling was and is always there. It doesn’t help that a good chunk of your time with Aki was wasted on avoiding getting to this intimate point in your relationship.
The person you were back then would’ve looked down on you. How could you give in to these selfish desires? Get into a relationship with someone knowing the limited time you have left. It wasn’t fair to them or you. A cruel ending to have to anyone. So you did what at the time felt like the best thing to do, barricaded yourself from the world.
You were committed to keeping a facade up. A mock up personality to shield you and others from getting close to you. You hoped you could keep up with it long enough that one day you leave this world and feel relief no one would experience grief like you did. 
Sadly even with trying to avoid the inevitable, you landed in the worst possible position ever. To end up regretting what you did and having to accept the conditions your fear set out for you. If only you gave up sooner than later. Maybe just maybe you would have enjoyed more of these moments with Aki.
“You okay?”
Your head whips to him, ocean eyes hold much concern. “Yeah why?”
He frowns, not convinced at all. “You’re shaking.”
It’s when he mentions it that you realized your shaky hands. Instantly you shove whatever lingering thought you had left and try to play it off as something else, despite knowing he wouldn’t believe you. “Just….” You trail off drawing a blank for an excuse.
“If you’re going to lie, at least make it believable.” He scolds but his actions don’t mirror his words as he pulls you in for an embrace. “There’s something bothering you. You can talk to me, you know?”
You have… Already. It was a topic that was brought up quite often between the two of you. It was hard to really fully walk past the topic. No advice or form of communication would really ease the both of you of what’s yet to come. But it does in some way help temporarily. At least, until you come back to the same thought again like now.
A sigh leaves your lips when you snuggle closer into his chest, arms wrapped tightly around his large frame. “You already know what it is.”
The same sigh leaves his lips as his grip tightens. “I’m here nonetheless.”
Much to his response, it does say a lot. Both of you fall into another routine. Where one would be reminded of the ticking time bomb and the other comes around to comfort them. Neither of you felt the need to speak more with how often it happens. It was a silent way of saying “I’m tired of this too, but just know I’m here for you if you wanna talk more. Just say it and I’ll be here to listen.”
After a few moments, you finally pull back to look at him. A bittersweet smile on your lips. “Thank you.”
His arms never leave you. Instead, they are holding the sides of your arms, thumbs rubbing soothing circles into you. “Anytime.”
Finishing up the last bit that was needed to be done, you both head out to the balcony. You pulled a bit of the curtain from inside to shield where his dingy white lawn chair was on his balcony. A simple but not really effective way to have some privacy from the sleeping children. As you close the sliding glass door, the chills of the night are apparent on your bare arms.
Aki sits down first then signals for you to take the spot on his lap. “Sit, I’m not making you stand.”
Well, you can’t really deny such a tempting offer. You smile at him before doing just that. Both of you adjust yourselves a bit before settling comfortably in the current position. Your head on his shoulder, his arms wrapped around your waist, and fingers intertwined on your lap. 
The soft buzz of the night life from his quiet neighborhood drowns out your thoughts as you stare aimlessly at the street lights. His arm that was once on your waist now hoists up just below your upper back. He pulls you in closer.
“Hm?” You question the sudden movement.
Aki is silent for a few seconds before talking. “I was just thinking.”
You return the same silence before saying. “Care to elaborate?”
“I…” He pauses, unsure how to say what he wants to say. 
There was just too much to say and too little of the time to say it at that moment. No amount of words or poems could describe the cloud 9 feeling he gets when he sees you there, just existing in his world. It reminds him so much of everything that it overwhelms his mind and makes him draw a blank during moments like this.
Where he wants to say everything but can’t.
So many words and sentences just zoom around him like dust in the air getting blown until it turns into a tornado. Every fleeting thought gets thicker and stronger. It consumes his mind and he can’t choose nor figure out what he wants to say during moments like these. What’s something that could just say everything he needs to say all at once? To tell you he appreciates you. Wants to stay like this with you forever. To continue to live in each other's presence until time stops him for good.
To see you come through that damn door again with a big smile and sparkling eyes as you hold bags of food in both your hands happily. While greeting him with that god forsaken fucking melodic voice of yours.
It hits him.
It’s so simple but it finally hits him.
He looks down at you, meeting your eyes one last time as his nervousness clogs his own throat. The phrase in itself is simple but the meaning is so heavy, so meaningful to him that it almost scares him away from being able to say it. But it’s the only thing that really describes this feeling he feels for you.
God he should really shut up and just say-
“I love you.”
He watches closely to the way your face reacts to this statement, both out of fear and excitement. It’s when he sees the way your eyes get slightly glossy and your cheeks burn bright in warm hues like a sunrise that he reflects the same expression with the biggest smile.
Not much is said. Only the sound of multiple pecks and tender kisses from Aki as he covers your whole face with love. You giggle like a lil highschool girl from all the affection. After almost basically covering 90% of your face in kisses, you finally get a word in. Feeling overwhelmed from joy and love.
“I love you too.” You finally say, holding his face close til your noses are just barely touching. “I… Never thought you could ever love me.”
He understands very well what you meant by that. Given the history between the two of you, but he doesn’t care. At least at this moment he doesn’t. The rays of pure unfiltered feeling of love is all too consuming and subtly blinds him from truly acknowledging the double meaning to your statement.
“We have gone off on the wrong foot and I know we both regret heavily how late it is to be in this position.” He starts off in a whisper then tilts his head slightly to rub the side of your noses, lips barely hovering over yours. “But to me, in this very moment with you, without all the worries we had been dealing with before for weeks. Hell fucking months!” Raising his tone just a bit to playfully emphasize the last part of his statement. “I know for sure I love you. The person here on my lap. The body that holds your beautiful heart and the beautiful heart that holds your soul. From every bit and piece of you, that is all for me to love until I can no longer feel.”
You feel your face get more red with every word being said. It absolutely stuns you to the core and you can’t get your mind to put together a sentence or a single word to say. You’re not used to this true unadulterated form of love. It completely fried your brain, and the only response or reaction you gave were tears.
“I…” You first choke out. “I didn’t do anything special.” You sob out. The big insecure part of you is in some way confused by his declaration. “All I’ve done is hurt you, Aki. I don’t understand.”
He quickly adjusts your positions enough to fully face you from above. Your eyes are bloodshot red, cheeks wet from tears. It’s so painful to see the doubts you’ve had hidden from him resurface but he doesn’t mind. Cause you’re you. He loves you for you, therefore he loves all that comes with you.
Aki starts to kiss your tears and gently guides you to sit up on his lap. Both his hands on your cheeks, wiping the remaining falling tears with his thumbs.
“Hurt is inevitable. We’re human, hurting others will always happen whether we intended to or not. I forgive you love, because I understand what it’s like to be scared of connecting. Especially in the field we’re working in.” His voice is tender and gentle, reassuring you with much sincerity.
He takes the time to really admire every little detail about you. How your hair frames your face. The little scratches and scars from Devil attacks on the cheeks he loves to kiss. How your eyes hold every single emotion that shapes the person you are today.
Your entire being is everything to him.
“You were made to be loved. I don’t care what person or experience made you believe you weren’t but I’m telling you this now sincerely that you were made to be loved inside and out.” 
As each word escapes his lips, he can’t help but inch your face closer and closer and closer until his lips just barely hover over yours.
“Especially by me.”
There was a part of you that wanted to scream at him for lying. For spewing out such bullshit to you at this moment. Cause how can someone so beautiful like him love someone so complex and messy like you? How is that possible?
Whatever the case was, there was a stronger, more hopeful side to you that believes everything he claims. It constantly clashes swords with your insecurities. The same insecurities that made you push him away.
And you know better than to do that now.
He watches the way your eyes light up just a bit as a smile forms. “I love you Aki. Thank you for being…. You.”
It’s after saying that you finally lean in and kiss him with all the same love and care he has for you. He makes no mistake to delay this. Kissing you back with all his entirety. Your souls intertwine through an invisible bond the more the kiss deepens. Unspoken love of affirmations set ablaze the passion you have for each other.
And in that very moment, both of you knew no matter how much time you guys wasted wishing and counting your regrets. You still had each other. As bittersweet as it is, that’s all anyone could ask for.
Well… Aki is hoping he could ask for your hand in marriage but let’s leave that for another time.
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A/N: thanks for reading! please let me know if you see any mistakes with the gn!reader pov, this is my first :)
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aziraphales-library · 4 months
Note
Hi! Thank you for this blog. I was wondering if you could recommend any fics where one or the other or both at once think the other is dead?I love presumed dead fics.
Hello! You can check some previous presumed dead recs here, and you may also be interested in our #temporary character death tag. Here are some more presumed dead fics...
The Empty Flat & The Burning Bookshop by probably_publius (T)
It took a lot for Aziraphale to finally give in and give Crowley the thermos of Holy Water, and when he does, he is ladden with guilt. He can only hope that he doesn't use it on himself. In this storyline, Sergeant Shadwell takes just a minute longer to run to Mr. Fell's bookshop and misses Aziraphale after he runs to Crowley's flat. Meanwhile, Crowley is driving (if you can call it driving) to the bookshop. Aziraphale finds the demon goop and his thermos of Holy Water in Crowley's empty flat, his best friend gone. Crowley finds the bookshop in flames, his best friend gone. Warnings!!! You have been warned! Heavy angst, some swearing, reference to murder , reference to discorporation, reference to stealing, mention of Nazis, themes of and apparent suicide, themes of depression, self-loathing, and self-guilt.
Fractured Heart by Blue_Sparkle (T)
Angels are sturdy beings, but rigid and changeless and not meant to endure grief or loss. When thousands Fall and many more are slain in the Great Rebellion, they either literally break apart...or forget. Aziraphale's only memories of his lost beloved are his lover's skill at creating stars. Memories he cherishes above all else. It complicates matters when his heart starts attaching to a certain demon, but perhaps his time on earth can teach him how to heal.
Stitches by CaspianTheGeek (E)
Until now, Aziraphale's family has seen fit to ignore him slipping into the village to see his tailor-turned-lover. That is until the King dies and Aziraphale's brother decides it is time he finds a proper match. Crowley is sent to prison and Aziraphale is told he has died for daring to love the prince. Love isn't so easily stopped, and Crowley is determined to return to Aziraphale however he can. (I promise, this will absolutely have a happy ending. As all my stories do.)
Anyway, Don't Be A Stranger by Juno_Sunlit (T)
It's been 10 years since Crowley died, and Aziraphale has mourned for every single minute. It's also been 10 years since Aziraphale died, and Crowley, up in the stars, has done the same. To God's chagrin, neither is aware of the other's continued existence. Sick and tired of grief big enough to end a universe, She sends them both on a trip through their old haunts, hoping they'll meet. All is as well and good as possible until something happens to Aziraphale, and a grieving Crowley must unknowingly come to his rescue. Includes musings on existence, gentle, warm flashbacks, demonic heists of a homosexual nature, God in slippers, asshole Gabriel, tearful reunions, the inherent tenderness of loving someone ever so much, and, through all the sorrow, a very happy ending.
A Beautiful Fiction by Thestarlitrose (E)
Nineteen years after having his memories of Crowley stolen, Aziraphale encounters Warlock and has everything come rushing back to him. Together; with the help of an ex-antichrist, they embark on a journey through the Southeastern, United States to locate Crowley to bring him home, where he belongs. Chapters with smut and other potential triggers will be listed in the notes.
The Ghost of Husbands Past by A_N_D (E)
Az always knew that he’d be thrown out the moment his father found out he was gay. He hadn’t expected to be declared dead though - or for his husband to believe it! But their marriage had been a foolish teenage impulse (not to mention invalid in America), so when Az moved to a small town far upstate New York to start his new life, he moved alone. The kindest thing he could do was let Crowley mourn and move on, not be shackled for life to a now disabled partner. Tony Crowley never recovered from losing his best friend, his childhood sweetheart, his better half. He’d been drifting ever since; no plans, no hope, no money - and now, just before Thanksgiving, no job either. Given the stark choice of freezing to death or accepting his sister’s invitation to join her upstate, Tony reluctantly lives out the Hallmark cliche of Recently Unemployed Person Moves to Small Town for Christmas. It’s a time of hope, love, and family. It’s time for Az and Tony to find each other again.
- Mod D
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project-sekai-facts · 5 months
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yo, do ya have any favourite lyrics and/or line distributions? akito getting multiple lines about dogs is neato
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Hoshizora no Melody has my favorite lyrics in the game it's not even a tough choice. I love how well every character's arc is conveyed through only a few lines it's so good. Emu could never and would never leave PXL (her grandad) behind, and WxS was able to finally change things for her and help her protect it. Rui was outcast his whole life and he came to accept it as something that would never change - it wasn't until WxS (Tsukasa) reached out to him and let him be passionate about his dreams without judging him that he was finally able to turn things around. Tsukasa throws his all into theatre (making people happy) and it's something that is so deeply ingrained as a part of himself, but WxS let him actually pave the way to make his dream a reality. Nene was too shy to face anyone and couldn't get over the things in her way (her past failures), but she was able to rediscover her passion for singing and is able to sing for everyone once again.
The prechorus parts too, Emu and Tsukasa sing the part about realising that the world can make people smile because both of their dreams are to make people smile. Emu and Rui singing about the world giving life back to things they'd given up because Rui gave up on the thought of belonging and Emu was going to have to give up the Wonder Stage. Rui getting the part about celebrating the colors of the world because his dream is to create shows that anyone can enjoy regardless of identity.
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As you said I think Akito getting lines about dogs is a nice little bit of recurring irony. I particularly like this example from Gekokujo that conveys his unwavering determination and drive even when he's faced with forces pushing against him really nicely. Also just Gekokujo's lyrics as a whole I think reflect the event so well.
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N25 probably has the best lyric game like there's so many good examples from their songs. Particular favorites would have to be Engeki for summarising basically Mafuyu's entire life in such a gut-punching way, and Tricologe for a similar reason for Hoshizora in that it just does such a good job of representing every character.
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IDSMILE/lower parallels my beloved <3
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Gunjou Sanka is another favorite of mine. If you couldn't tell by now I love stuff that either tells a story or describes a character. Or both. All of Gunjou Sanka is so good and really packs a punch with the emotions but I really like the first verse and prechorus here where it describes the basics of each main story in just one or two lines each. I especially love the Leo/need segment about being able to believe in wanting to stay together since they've moved on from their pasts and are reuinted now.
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And how could I forget Mr. Showtime. This one has such clever lyrics and I love the use of parentheses to add secondary meanings to certain parts. The whole song is perfection but I'm particularly fond of this section here, specifically the last line because it understands Tsukasa so much better than like half the fandom does. Theatre is something that Tsukasa genuinely dedicates everything to, in some ways (every way) it is his life. Phoenix is a great example to demonstrate that because it highlights just how much it means to him and how he's willing to put it above everything else, including his own wellbeing, to try and overcome the obstacles he faces. At the end of the day though, even if it's tough and can feel like it's taking too long or isn't worth it, the roadblocks he doesn't anticipate are the ones that help him improve most and get closer to his dream than anything else.
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also just this one lyric from Showtime Ruler I love character development. Karasuyasabou actually says that's his favorite in the song, and he talked quite a lot about the lyrics for the rest of the song in his corocoro interview. I'd suggest giving it a read because it's pretty interesting what he says about how he wrote it.
this is getting a bit long so i'll stop here haha
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xmalfoyweasleyx · 11 months
Text
All that bloodshed, crimson clover
Based on The Great War - Taylor Swift and my tiktok story (you can watch it for some visualisation, it has multiple parts)—> my taylor swift songs masterlist
Summary: What happens when they find out that every person, killed by a monster, is stuck in the upside down? You were killed by the mindflayer weeks ago, but your grieving boyfriend Steve finds out you’ve been trying to survive in the upside down all this time. They try to find you but Steve is filled with guilt and realizes some heartbreaking facts about it all.
Warning: angst, blood, grieving, death -> happy ending! 2k words
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I used pictures of Steve because there’s so much pictures of him I imagined when I wrote this <3 Enjoy xx
My knuckles were bruised like violets Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked Spineless in my tomb of silence
Steve Harrington stared blankly at the photograph sitting on his nightstand, his girlfriend, Y/N, smiling back at him. The pain in his chest was still unbearable, and the weight of grief hung heavy upon his shoulders. It had been almost 1 month since Y/N's tragicdeath, killed by the mind flayer
The once confident and popular high school hero had become a mere shadow of his former self. He had lost his infectious smile, his carefree attitude, and the spark that made him Steve Harrington. And before he could even grieve properly, there was already some new kind of misery happening in Hawkins. But it wasn’t like before, Steve just couldn’t get involved in it all. He really wanted to help his friends with this Vecna stuff, but he couldn’t do it.
Countless nights of nightmares, waking up screaming, were now slowly fading away. He was getting better. At first, he couldn’t believe she wasn’t there anymore. He couldn't believe he would never kiss her anymore, never hold her, smell her. He wanted to return when it happened, he wanted to make her live again. But after some days he started to realize he shouldn’t have that kind of hope. He finally accepted it. The love of his life was gone, and he didn't save her.
A knock on the door interrupted Steve's thoughts. He sighed, stood up and opened the door to find his best friend, Dustin Henderson, standing there with a mix of excitement and trepidation on his face. Max, Robin, Nancy and Eddie were standing next to him with the same excitement. “What are you all doing here so smiley?" Steve asked, his voice tinged with a mixture of surprise and curiosity. He tried to seem okay, he always did even though he didn't see them that much anymore. "Dude, you won't believe what we found," Dustin exclaimed, his eyes gleaming with anticipation. "I think… I think Y/N might still be alive." Steve's heart skipped a beat, hope surging through his veins like an electric shock. His mind whirled with disbelief and longing. "What are you talking about? How is that even possible? I swear to god if this is some stupid prank, you are way out of the line” Steve rambled with a weird feeling in his stomach. “It’s a long story, we went to a crazy prisoner and stuff, but okay that doesn’t matter, we found out that every person, killed by a monster from the upside down, might still be alive and isn’t really killed, but just stuck in there, haunted by these creatures." Steve didn’t respond, he couldn’t find the energy. He could only sit down on the edge of his bed, staring blankly in front of him. This couldn’t be true, it must be a dream. Or maybe they were wrong?
Uh-huh, tears on the letter I vowed not to cry anymore If we survived the Great War
It went silent. All the others were so excited but Steve didn’t have one emotion on his face. Even though on the inside, he was exploding with thousands of feelings. Nancy sat next to him with a look of sympathy on her face. “I know this must be very hard for you, not to forget incredibly confusing. But you have to believe us, if we find her she might still be there, your Y/N,” she said, delicately laying a hand on his shoulder. “We have no time to lose, she might have survived, but she’s still in there with all those monsters” Eddie added nervously. That’s when they all started rambling to each other, pulling out maps and flashlights. That’s when Steve finally realized, they were making up a plan. They had to go into the upside down. She was alive. It was all true. It wasn’t a joke. As much as he wanted to help, he was still frozen on his bed. And as if he wasn’t feeling bad enough, another big wave of guilt washed over him. He could have saved her all this time. “Are you okay?” Nancy asked. “I gave up on her” Steve said with a flat tone. “No no Steve, you can’t blame yourself, no” she shook her head. “All this time, when I was here crying, full of self-pity. She was there, hurt, haunted, trying to survive. And I didn’t help, I didn’t look for her, I didn't go back” he said, tears in his eyes. “Steve… we saw it happen, she had a funeral, you thought she was dead, we all did,” Nancy whispered gently.
All that bloodshed, crimson clover
Uh-huh, the bombs were close and
My hand was the one you reached for
The air of the upside down was thick with an oppressive silence as Steve cautiously navigated the eerie, distorted version of Hawkins. Robin, Nancy and Eddie are close behind him. The once-familiar woods and streets were now tangled with overgrown vegetation and crumbling buildings.Steve's heart pounded in his chest as he sensed a presence in the darkness. He could hear the faint fluttering of wings, growing louder with each passing moment. His grip tightened on the bat as a swarm of weird bats descended upon him.
They suddenly attacked them from all sides, their piercing screeches filling the air. Steve swung his bat fiercely, striking at the relentless creatures, but their numbers seemed endless. Behind him he heard screams and groans from his friends. Steve fought valiantly, but the bats' relentless assault left him disoriented and on the defensive. His heart raced as they attacked his now muddy and bloody body, leaving scratches that stung with each strike. He stumbled backward unable to find an escape route.We’ve lost, he thought. We’re never going to find y/n and we’ll die here too.
And that’s when the creatures suddenly stopped and looked around, they seemed distracted by something.“Come on, catch it” they heard a voice in the distance scream. The distant shadow threw something far into the woods, the material was immediately followed by the bats. They flew away like nothing happened.The shadow ran closer to them and that’s when Steve saw her.
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Her pretty face was scratched up, her hair all messy but still with the same beautiful shade of y/h/c. She looked at them like she'd seen a ghost.“Y/N,” he sighed. “Steve? How did you find me” she answered with tears in her eyes. She rushed to his side and embraced him tightly."I thought I lost you forever," Steve whispered, his voice choked with emotion.Y/N held him even tighter, her voice filled with both sadness and hope. "It was horrible Steve, luckily I found some ways to distract all those creatures.. but.. but..” She stuttered, finding no words to explain. For weeks now, y/n believed they would never find her, that they would forget about her and move on.
The couple stood there, both at lost for words, hands grabbing each other like they could get separated again. Steve was mesmerized. All this time grieving her and thinking about her, he already forgot how pretty she really was. How soft her hands felt on his skin and how her smile felt so warm and familiar.“Steve you’re hurt” y/n’s worried voice interrupted his thoughts. That’s when his attention went to the stinging feeling in his stomach. Steve felt dizzy when he saw all the blood dripping from it.“There in the woods, let’s patch him up there” Nancy points.
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Steve leans into the rocks, closing his eyes and groaning. He eyes closed automatically and he tried his best not to faint.“Heyheyhey, keep your eyes open sweet boy, look at me” he heard y/n’s voice. When he opened his eyes he tried to focus on the beautiful y/e/c he'd been wanting to look at for weeks now. “You’re beautiful” he whispered with all his last energy.“Here use this” she heard Nancy say behind her. She handed her a piece of fabric. “Thanks” y/n nodded.“Okay Stevie, this is gonna hurt a little” she prepared him. But Steve’s pain eased already a little when he heard her say Stevie to him. She stroked his cheek, hesitant, but lovingly, not sure at what point in their relationship they’re standing now.Butterflies fluttered in Steve’s stomach, but the feeling went away quickly when he felt the material against his wounds.Steve groaned, he focused on y/n’s face, finding comfort in it. She was standing close to him and it was incredible how, even in this situation, her touch and presence could make him want her so bad. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted to touch her, he wanted to show her how much he loved her. A sexual tension, the electricity hangs in the air. “There you go” she whispered, staring longingly into his eyes.“Y/n.. I-“ Steve tried but got cut off by Eddie, “Okay you both can talk and fuck this ,whatever it is, long build up tension off later, but now we gotta get out of this freaking place”.“You’re right, please take me back home” y/n sighed with a mixture of fear and excitement.
Broken and blue, so I called off the troops
That was the night I nearly lost you
I really thought I lost you
On their walk to find a way out, the mood in the woods felt cold and dark. Steve and y/n were walking next to each other in silence. The boy didn’t know what thing to say first, he tried to come up with the perfect thing to say but he couldn’t.
“I heard you, you know?” y/n finally said. Steve didn’t get it at first, but then he realized. Everybody who knows about the upside down, knows you can hear the voices of the people on the other side if they’re in the same room. Will did. And he also… oh shit... He also communicated with the lights. Did y/n.. did y/n do that too?
Another big wave of guilt washed over Steve.
“I heard you in your room, at night when you had nightmares. I heard you fighting with Robin about what happened. I heard you getting better.” She confessed. She probably heard everything, Steve thought. “Please don’t tell me that you tried to contact me through the lights and that I didn’t notice,” Steve answered. Y/n stayed silent, which said enough.
“Oh god” the boy sighed with a sad tone, disappointed in himself.
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“I gave up after a while. I listened to you for a long time, it gave me comfort. But you never noticed the lights flickering. I can’t blame you Steve, I heard how much pain you were in. But then I stopped listening. You got back on track with your life and I thought… I thought I was going to die here eventually” y/n confessed. They stopped walking and Steve looked at her with the most guilty and sad eyes she’d ever seen. He was wondering how he could ever forgive himself for this.
“Did you… ever… like.. find someone? When I was gone?” She asked hesitantly. “What do you mean?” Steve didn’t understand her. “Like, did you fall in love again? If you did I would understand, I mean I was pretty dead and you were alone and-“ she mumbled stressed. His heart breaks at the way she nervously toys with her fingers. “Heyhey stop stop, of course not. I could never. I- I still love you too much, okay? Don’t worry, I… I l still love you” he comforted her, not getting how on earth she would think he could fall in love with someone else so fast.
“I lov-“ y/n tried but she got cut off by a sudden dizziness. “Are you okay? Y/n?!” Steve exclaimed. “It.. it happens sometimes these last days.. it’s-“ and then she fainted. Steve tried to catch her but he was too late.
Eddie, Robin and Nancy turned around quickly when they heard the sound.
“What happened?!” Robin screamed, worried.
“She just fainted, said it happens sometimes” Steve answered while pulling her body on the ground closer to him.
“It must be from being in here for so long, this air is kind of toxic” Nancy concluded.
“We need to get out of this place” Steve nervously said.
I vowed I would always be yours
'Cause we survived the Great War
Y/n woke up, surprised by the comfort of soft pillow under her. Her body ached less and her eyes hurt from seeing light in after a very long time. And it didn’t smell horrible anymore, it smelled great. She inhaled the sent that smelled like home. The moment your body relaxed you realized it was Steve’s smell, his house. That’s when you saw room. You were finally back. “That wallpaper is still terrible” you sighed jokingly. Steve laughed. Y/n’s eyes started to water a little, “I’m back home,” she cried happily. “You’re back home” Steve nodded stroking her hair.
That’s when Steve promised he would never give up on her again. She would be his wife, the mother of his children, his for ever companion and so much more. If survived this, they could survive anything.
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strip4kaneshiro · 2 years
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Dating Headcanons w Shoto
This man is chaotic af and I love his dynamic so I’ll be separating this into male vs female since he’s stated that he’s bisexual, happy pride month. I’m basing this on how he interracts with his male and female friends :)) (mostly Bao and Vox cause those r the clips I see the most and who he’s most comfy with)
As his girlfriend..
- he tries to be as helpful as possible around the house
-you two are constantly competing for the housewife position??
- one of you starting a lewd joke and it just snowballs out of control💀💀
- “ (name), honey, darling, my love, love of my life, get your sexy ass over here like right now” “oh my gosh ew Shoto u wanna eat my ass? Not on stream babe <33 ;)” “THIS GIR- THATS NOT WHAT I SAIDDD!!”
-oh yeah! Shoto sometimes does streams with you sitting in the same room as you or in his lap
- “todays stream is gonna be co-oped with my darling (name)-sama uwu” “Shoto I stg”
- he’s not afraid to announce the weird stuff you do, just cause ur off camera does NOT mean your off the hook
- “CAN YOU STOP FUCKING SHAKING YOUR ASS IN THE DOORWAY WHAT THE FUCK??-!”
- he commissions a custom asset for you, it’s of you slumping ur chin over his shoulder aw
- Shoto also commissions assets with ur regular model like holding hands, parading each other’s heads ect.
- using popular romance anime couples as pfps on your private social media accounts ( hori and miyamura, usui and misaki, etc)
- when your on your period, he grabs your heat source of choice (if it isn’t him ofc) and water. Along with anything else you ask for
- he also loves watching you style your hair in the morning. Like he’ll literally sit on the counter in the bathroom and watch you get ready
- you make him help but he just takes it as an excuse to have his hands all up in ur head???
- if your hair is on the straighter side, he styles it sometimes with random clips and intricate styles, but if it’s thicker and/or curlier, he stays out that territory entirely.
- poor babes doesn’t want to accidentally make your hair matted
- self care with (ship name) every Saturday and Tuesday!!
As his boyfriend
- if you thought he was bad with Uki or Vox, he’s even worse with you
- not one bone in his body can be stopped from being down abysmal for you (believe me, the people have tried)
- your assets are just as cute as the female counterpart, if not more. He also commissions pride month pfps and assets
- minecraft is just so domestic, he gives u flowers and shit.
- inexplicably horny tho, he bends over all the time while wearing short-shorts and is like
“I mean, well it’s hot, what else am I supposed to do huh? Go nude instead?”
Yes…please..
- this smug little shit, try flirting with him during a game though. It works, I’ve tried I swear
- “babe, if you get this next kill, on god I’ll suck you off after stream”
Player🔫sho
- he tells chat stories about what you guys do everyday and it’s so cute, like story time w Shoto.
- “so, uhhh, this morning! When (name) woke up this morning, he looked up at me from bed this morning and was like ‘mmm…g’morning baby…~’ in his seductive ass morning voice and *flustered noises*!!”
- he’s your biggest simp fan
- for some reason when he’s sick he just??? Starts streaming like every wasn’t coughing his lungs out?
- do you have to pick him up and carry him to bed, promptly ending Stream? Maybe
- his sick voice is so adorable though oh my gosh, so being around him is worth it
- “baaaaaabe, can you give me more medicineee?~ and another driiink?~” he calls from the bedroom
- teasing him >>>
- just do it, trust me you’ll enjoy it. He gets all shy and tsundere
- giving him compliments and praise back to back makes him go full tsundere though. Do with that information as you please
Either way, Shoto is a great boyfriend for men and women alike. Nobody gets left behind in this train! So treasure the time with him that you have. And remember, bribe him with sushi and maybe….juuust maybe, he’ll put on the dog ears (yes he has a pair irl)
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skeletonsinboth · 1 year
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Now please allow me to sing this movie's praises.
First, I love a sequel that knows its a sequel. It didn't try to outdo Enchanted at all. I think that "That's How You Know" is THE song from Enchanted and Robert and Giselle dancing at the ball is THE scene. None of the songs tried to be That's How You Know, or be better. They never tried to do a better dance scene. There was the adorable little slow dance at the very end but it was more in honor of the original. Everything was in honor of the original. They respected it and added onto the story in a way that made sense and was good. It was so good.
All of the old disney easter eggs got me they really did!!! We love easter eggs.
The plot as a whole was just!!!!! So good!!!!!! I love that Giselle's life wasn't bad, she just had struggles that she never would have had in Andalasia. And I also love that even though Morgan's teenager-ness was the catalyst for the conflict, she wasn't villainized for it. Giselle didn't resent her for it, she just wanted to understand and help. She wasn't "fixed" at the end. She was still a teenager, still a little snippy, she's still gonna be embarrassed by Giselle sometimes, but that's ok. And Giselle understands her better now. Her whole relationship with Morgan was beautiful. The way she was just so desperate to help, how Morgan was declared a true Andalasian daughter because she's Giselle's daughter. Morgan calling Giselle "mom" really got to me. The fact that her saying "she's my stepmother" has the power to make Giselle that upset just shows how good of a mom she is!!!! That entire dynamic was just. More than I could have asked for.
Speaking of dynamics!! Giselle and Nancy girlbossing together. Amazing. Edward trying to help Robert. Adorable. I love how Giselle and Nancy basically switching roles made them able to understand each other so well. The fact that Nancy is the one dealing with hobgoblins on a daily basis now but she can still give Giselle teenager advice. I love it. Nancy and Edward on their own were amazing as well!!!!! Big fan of them not having kids. Big fan of Edward being the largest himbo to exist even after all these years. Big fan of him sword fighting with the kids at the end. Big fan of him saying "that's all it [the wishing plate] does, we're fairly certain?" Big fan of Nancy's wardrobe. Big fan of them being Sofia's godparents. Big fan of the implication that they visit pretty often. Big fan of them <3
The Giselle and Robert content, while perhaps a bit more sparce than I may have hoped for, was just UGSFJHSDBHGBVOUBGABVSDAU. Perfect. The way he looks at her??? Kill me. I love how he loves her singing now. When he was watching her dance around the house in the beginning and when he was smiling when she started singing again that night OH MY GOD I LOVE HIM I LOVE THEM. The kiss at the end. Actually. Every kiss. They kiss and I cry it's very simple. The glimpse of the wedding oh my god??? When you can hear Robert's voice say "I do" and "You'll always be a princess to me" when Giselle's getting the memories back I DIED. And I choose to believe the princess line was a part of his vows. Yeah.
The soundtrack was great. Badder is my favorite at the moment lol. Speaking of, Amy Adams' range???? I mean I knew she had it but Giselle slowly becoming a villain was so satisfying to watch. I loved when she was talking to herself sdfbsdjf she's so funny. The humor all around was great too!
That's all I got for now. I'm sure more will come to me. Overall i really loved the movie and im really happy with how they handled it and seeing Giselle and Robert again in the year 2022 was desperately needed for my mental health. thank you.
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scarlet4rose · 1 year
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the ex-boyfriend
Jess Mariano x reader
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pt.1 (yes, I seriously turned this into a two-part story)
request: please do one where the reader and jess are dating but the reader runs into their ex boyfriend and jess gets jealous!!!
alright, I’m gonna try my best ;)
⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
On a late Friday afternoon, you're on your way to Luke's Diner. 
You and your boyfriend Jess want to go to the movies tonight, after not seeing each other much all week, since Jess took on extra shifts at Luke's and Walmart.
 You and Jess have only been a couple for about a month, but you already miss him every second you're apart.
 You begin to walk more briskly to get to Luke's Diner faster, where you're supposed to meet Jess. The diner is only half lit and before you get to the other side of the street, the door opens and Jess comes rushing out. 
As he leaves the diner, he puts on his jacket and runs towards you. You notice a distinct grin on his face and start running, too. Before you are fully able to stop, he picks you up in his arms and spins you around in the air. 
"Jess," you say in surprise, as he sets you back down on the ground, leans forward and gives you a deep kiss. He takes your face in both his hands and you feel your knees go weak, inevitably. 
Jess ends the kiss and you stare at him, stunned: "What was that for?” Jess grins mischievously and continues to look you in the eyes: "I just felt like it".
 Then he puts his arm around you to pull you closer to him and you begin to saunter off in the direction of the movie theater.
You look up to him "Well, you could feel like doing that more often" 
Jess returns your gaze and hastily kisses your cheek "I always feel like doing that, always"
You feel yourself blushing slightly and lean more against his side "I didn't know that" 
"Like you could" Jess says in a sarcastic tone of voice and rolls his eyes "I've just been after you for almost an entire year now". You giggle softly, unaware that Jess' heart is leaping at the sweet sound of your laughter. 
He turns his head to you once more and kisses your cheek again. "Jess, I can barely walk straight with you doing that all the time. I'm about to fall over," you say with a grin. 
"Not a problem at all, I’m right here to catch you like the knight in shining armor I am" Jess chuckles and tilts his head to the side to give you another kiss, now more than ever.
You fear your heart might burst from sheer bliss. You have never been as happy as you are with Jess, and you have never felt for any boy the way you feel for him. You know it's love. You love Jess. You've never loved a guy before, but the emotions Jess evokes in you are unlike anything else. 
True love. It threw you off a little at first, but now you couldn't be any gladder to be with him. 
The two of you, still nestled together, turn around a corner, only to nearly collide with another couple. Wincing, you take your head off Jess' shoulder and can hardly believe your eyes as you realize who's standing right in front of you. 
It's Tyler Thompson (lol not me making up another guy every week)  
Your former boyfriend. 
"No way, Y/N, great to see ya," Tyler says, surprised but smiling wide.
"Hi" you say hesitantly and glance over at the girl on his arm. You've seen her before at school, though you don't share more than one or two classes together. You notice she kind of resembles you in a way. 
" Well, that's a coincidence!" Tyler exclaims cheerfully. 
"Yeah, um, it really is," you then say, smiling slightly. 
"Right, and coincidentally, I am y/n's boyfriend. Jess," Jess suddenly announces in a firm and definite tone. You look up at him and see his grim, newly stern face. 
Tyler eyes Jess dismissively and smirks, "Nice. I'm Tyler" 
"Chelsea's boyfriend," the girl on his arm adds, grinning big. 
"Yeah, that's Chelsea" Tyler comments unnecessarily and returns to staring at you with obvious interest "So, what are you doing out here tonight?" 
Before you even get the chance to answer, Jess has already leaned forward. "We're going to the movies, if you don't mind" Jess puts his arm around your waist and pulls you closer. 
Tyler laughs smugly "I was asking Y/N, if you don't mind". 
The two boys glare at each other and you clench your jaw. Oh god, this is not going too well. 
Tyler then leans back a bit "Alright, you guys want to go the movie theater. Funny, Chelsea and I were going to see a movie today too." 
Jess takes a sharp breath, but this time you beat him to the punch. 
"That's actually quite a coincidence," you say, hoping to be able to smooth things over, "Jess and I want to go see this futuristic movie `Equilibrium`. The one with this new actor who played that psycho two years ago. Um... what was his name again?" 
"Christian Bale," Jess mutters through clenched teeth, still giving Tyler a dark glare. 
"Oh, that's right." you chime in, trying to cover up for Jess's bad behavior with being overly polite "Truly a gifted actor, in my opinion. So… which movie are you going to see?" 
“Uh, well,” Tyler tilts his head slightly, “The one you wanna see. Uh, the one with Bale, Christian Bale” You notice Chelsea taking a confused look at her boyfriend.
Jess snorts “Say that again. Come on. What’s the name of the movie you so desperately can’t wait to see?” 
Tyler towers up in front of Jess and pushes his chin forward "I said, the one with the Bale guy" 
"And I said, say the name of the movie!" Jess insists firmly. 
"Oh, come on now" Tyler shoves his hands into the pockets of his jeans "You're actin' like I don't know it"
"So, do you know it?" Jess asks snidely. 
"Of course I do! It's like Y/N just said. It's Equilli... Equil... Equillum-" Tyler groans, "It doesn't even fucking matter!!!" 
“Equilibrium, you idiot! And it does fucking matter! How are you gonna see a movie you don’t even know the name of?!” 
You know it’s time for you to try to defuse the situation "Cut him some slack, Jess. After all, it is a complicated name for a movie." 
Jess looks at you in disbelief. He can't believe you're sticking up for this douchebag. 
All of a sudden Chelsea speaks up: "Ty, I had no idea we were going to the movie theater today, let alone that we were gonna watch this weird Equi-something movie. That guy Bale gives me the creeps, he was way too convincing as the psycho to not be a psycho in real life..."
"It's called acting, Chelsea" Tyler sighs 
"Wait, so you didn't even want to go to the movies? Oh, that really hurts, Tyler!" Jess says, the sarcasm painfully obvious. His arm remains around your waist and he pulls you close once more "Really! I didn't see that coming, did I?".
The situation was getting more and more tense, and Jess' jealousy certainly was no help. 
"Well, I guess it doesn't really matter anyway," you mutter, still trying to smooth things over, "Actually, it's none of our business, is it, Jess?" 
With doe eyes you look up into Jess's frowning face. He doesn't say a word, even though you know he disagrees with you. 
You turn to your ex-boyfriend and poor Chelsea, who you somehow feel sorry for. "Also, Jess and I really need to get going now or else we're going to miss the beginning of the movie, so..." 
Tyler puts his arm around Chelsea again. "Yes, we gotta go," he says unironically, "The beginning is as important as the end."  
you had thought it would be impossible for Tyler to still stick to his plan to accompany you two to the movies after all the bickering. But Tyler's words, spoken so casually, reveal that you had thought wrong
Jess stares at him in shock, "We?" he repeats. "We gotta go watch the movie??!"
[...]
Part 2 is going to follow very soon!!
(also, don’t take my writing too seriously, I’m just trying to have a little fun with it... and yes, I’ve seen the movie)
note: story takes place in 2002 (when Equilibrium was first released)
edit: part 2 is up now => https://at.tumblr.com/scarlet4rose/the-ex-boyfriend-pt2/lpdl24ftepu9
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Enamored [46] - Vices and Virtues
A.N: Last 2 chapters!❤ I hope you’ll like this one my loves, and please let me know what you think, thank you! ❤ And as always, thank you @theskytraveler for helping me with the chapter and the story❤
Summary: Good things come to those who wait.
Warnings: Regency era society and social rules, mentions of sex, some gender specific language and terms, mentions of pregnancy.
Word Count: 4300
Series Masterlist
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In all honesty, this plan seemed easier when it was merely a plan.
Putting it into action though? That was a whole different story.
For the last week, the ton hadn’t stopped talking about your potential divorce and how your marriage was doomed. You knew you were supposed to be happy that everyone believed your deception, seeing that it would work in your favor, and you had managed to convince yourself it was a good thing so far-
Until now.
Your doubts were nonsense, they really were. Anthony and you’d had a wonderful night just like you always did, with him sneaking into your room after every member of the staff had gone to sleep. You had woken up craving each other as usual, but the problem was that both of you woke up a bit late, so the staff was already around the house.
Yet, it wasn’t enough to stop you.
You had managed to be quiet so as not to be heard by the staff but when you were finished, unlike before, Anthony didn’t have the time to hold you in his arms, or whisper sweet nothings into your ear, or even kiss you the way he usually would. As soon as the footsteps of the staff started echoing around the hallway, he hurriedly got into his trousers, pecked you on the lips and left through the shared door to his own room, leaving you there, almost dazed.
Last night was perfect, and so had been the morning—up until that point.
For some reason, that was what made those doubts in your mind about whether his love for you was fast withering as the ton said much louder than before. It didn’t help that Anthony had left even before the breakfast, so when Cecily came to drag you outside so that you could choose the paintings you would use for your upcoming ball from her museum, you still weren’t feeling so well.
“It’s such a lovely place,” you commented as you and Cecily sat in front of a painting and she smiled at you wide.
“Is it not?” she asked. “I still cannot believe that it’s mine.”
“Elias can have good ideas, as rare as they are,” you pointed out and she let out a giggle before putting a hand over her slightly swollen stomach, making you smile softly.
“Do you feel better?” you asked. “With the morning sickness?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “Well, I’m getting quite used to the morning sickness, that’s something.”
“Is it that bad still?”
“Mama says it gets slightly better in time,” she said. “And you?”
“Me?”
“You look a bit…” she trailed off. “Is everything alright?”
You paused for a moment, then tried to smile.
“Of course,” you lied through your teeth. “I’m just tired, I sent all the invitations yesterday and was up all night planning the last part of the scenery in the ballroom.”
“I must admit, I knew your ball would cause a great expectation within the ton, but even I didn’t see that theme coming,” she said. “I’ve never been to a Vices and Virtues theme at a ball before, neither has anyone in the ton. So many people are excited about it, I’ve heard them before I visited mama this morning.”
“Really?”
“Oh yes,” she said. “Absolutely. It’s the perfect ball to end the season. Do you want to hear the gossip?”
“Sure.”
“A lot of men are coming as vices because they think it’s more fun, and as expected a lot of mamas are going to make sure their daughters come as virtues because it’s fitting to unmarried ladies, or so they say,” she said. “What is Anthony going to be by the way? Lust?”
That managed to make you smile and you took a deep breath.
“Well, that was his first idea,” you said. “But then we realized Elias is going to be there, so…”
“Mm, good point. Then?”
“He will be Pride,” you said. “It’s quite fitting if you ask me, at least for when we first met.”
“I would say your costume should be Modesty to go along with his Pride, but I doubt modesty fits you,” she pointed out, making you scoff a laugh.
“I’m not that bad!”
“So will you go as…love?”
“I’m not going as a virtue,” you said. “I’m going as a vice.”
Cecily gawked at you and blinked a couple of times. “You’re going as a vice.”
“Yeah.”
“Y/N, all ladies are going as virtues.”
“Not me.”
“Oh everyone will lose their minds,” she muttered. “What vice will you be?”
You tilted your head. “Wrath,” you said. “I already ordered my gown, it will be blood red and my jewelry will be all rubies.”
“Blood red?”
“Yes.”
“The whole gown?”
“Yes.”
“My goodness,” she said. “Everyone will talk about it until the next season.”
You shrugged your shoulders. “It’s the sign of a well-planned ball.”
“Or a scandalous one.”
“Scandal is in my blood, remember?” you asked and nodded at the painting. “What is this called by the way? I don’t think I’m familiar with it.”
“Oh it’s Truth, Time and History,” she said. “It shows that… that history is a witness when time reveals the truth.”
You raised your brows.
“Can I borrow this one for the ball as well?” you asked. “It should go well with…well, what has been happening lately.”
“Of course, but on one condition.”
“What?”
“You will tell me what’s wrong.”
Your eyes snapped up to hers before you shifted your weight. “I told you, I’m tired.”
“Yes well, forgive me for not believing it,” she said. “Y/N, what is it?”
You bit inside your cheek, dragging your gaze from her to the painting again.
“We share everything, will you really not tell me?”
“It’s not that,” you muttered. “It’s just that….I’m genuinely tired, Cece. Of this pretending.”
A look of realization dawned on her face. “Y/N.”
“At first it was fun,” you murmured. “But it’s not anymore.”
“It’s almost over.”
You scoffed a bitter laugh. “If you say so.”
“No, really—Anthony said it himself that Frederick claimed he could help him with aftermath of divorce, about the land he will give you,” Cecily insisted. “It’ll be over soon, you’ve held on this long. Don’t give up now.”
You heaved a sigh and she sat up straighter.
“Did you talk to Anthony about it?”
“No because I can’t,” you said. “I can barely see him during the day, and most of the time he comes home in the middle of the night. Anytime I’m within anyone’s earshot I’m supposed to have fights with him, and we’re almost never alone—besides, what am I going to say? It was my decision to go with this idea, he wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t ask him to.”
“I know it’s hard,” she said, reaching out to hold your hand. “I know, but I promise you, it’s almost over.”
A silence fell upon you and you took a shaky breath.
“I hope you’re right,” you said. “Because it’s starting to feel less like we’re pretending each day.”
                                              *
You had cut your trip to the museum very short, and had gotten back home around the afternoon. Unsurprisingly, Anthony wasn’t home and you still had hours until one of the vendors would arrive to go over some of the decorations you had ordered for the ball, so you went straight to bed, telling Lucie that you were feeling a bit under the weather and didn’t want to be disturbed.  
You missed him. It was simple as that, even though you lived in the same house, you just missed kissing him, being with him, actually talking to him, enjoying a stroll outside, waking up in the same bed with him.
You laid there for nearly an hour, waiting for the sleep to come just so that you could perhaps wake up feeling better, but it felt nearly impossible. You were so lost in your thoughts that the noises coming from the hallways and the usual chatter of the staff was almost inaudible to you until you heard the fast footsteps approaching and the door opening, making you frown and turn your head. Anthony closed the door in an instant and strode to you.
“What happened?”
“Anthony you probably shouldn’t be here, if the staff sees or hears you—”
“Lucie said you were feeling sick,” he cut you off, pressing the back of his hand on your forehead to check if you had a temper, that familiar warmth filling your heart. “I will send for the doctor—”
“I am not sick,” you told him, trying to smile. “I just felt tired a little so I decided to lie down, that’s all.”
Anthony’s dark eyes searched your face, his brows furrowing in confusion.
“Tired?” he repeated. “You?”
“It happens, as it turns out,” you rasped out. “I’m as surprised as you are.”
He shook his head. “No, that’s not normal,” he said. “The doctor must see you immediately.”
“I’m not sick,” you insisted. “No need for the doctor, I promise. I’m just…”
He swallowed thickly, worry etched in his handsome features and you reached out to smooth down on the frown lines on his forehead, your heart skipping a beat.
“I thought you’d be outside today?” you changed the subject. “Is everything alright?”
“Yeah,” he nodded and entwined his fingers with yours. “More than alright, I actually came to tell you something.”
“What?”
“Do you think you can come with me to the study?”
You bit inside your cheek, then pursed your lips.
“I don’t want to fight today,” you said. “The staff is already convinced, and I don’t think it’s necessary right now.”
He shook his head fervently. “No it’s not for that.”
“Well then, I don’t think it’s a good idea if—”
“I have a gift for you.”
“…A gift?” you asked, blinking a couple of times in confusion. “What gift?”
“I can bring it here but I left it at the study just now, before Lucie said you weren’t feeling well.”
“No no, I’m fine,” you said almost instantly and pushed the covers off of you, your stomach doing a happy flip. “What did you get me?”
Anthony smiled and raised your hand to press his lips on the back of it.
“Come to the study in five minutes,” he said and kissed your temple, then walked out of the room. You tilted your head, that fog of the gloom clearing out just a little though not completely from your heart, then cleared your throat and checked whether you looked nice in the mirror before leaving the room as well.
You made your way downstairs and looked around to check whether any member of the staff would see you, but it seemed clear enough so you softly knocked on the door and stepped inside, closing the door behind you in a haste. Anthony’s grin widened and he made his way to you, then covered your eyes with his palm, making you giggle.
“What are you doing?”
“It’s a surprise,” he said as he went behind you and walked you towards his desk carefully. You reached out your hands as if that would help you not to fall, and you rounded the table, then stopped.
“Ready?”
“Yes.”
He lowered his hand and you looked down at his desk, then held your breath upon seeing the thick leather bound ledger.
“You got me a ledger!” you said with a happy smile. “To keep the accounts for the ball, I love it!”
He let out a chuckle. “You’re supposed to open it darling.”
“Oh!” you said and reached out to open it, furrowing your brows. There were many different sketches of a beautiful house—a manor, in fact— in the middle of tall trees and a lovely flower garden. It seemed familiar somehow but you couldn’t put your finger on it especially without seeing the rest of the street, so you grabbed the next sketch, showing the interior of the house. You let out a breath, running your fingertips over the sketch of the foyer, then turned to him.
“I don’t understand,” you admitted. “What is this?”
Anthony’s lips curled into a grin.
“Do you remember how I said your wedding gift wasn’t ready yet?” he asked. “Now it is. It’s your house, my love.”
Your breath got caught in your throat and your eyes snapped up to his, the sudden excitement making your head spin.
“…What?”
“The paperwork is finally completed,” he said and pulled the paper from underneath the sketches. “The moment you sign here, it’s yours.”
“It’s mine?” you asked, gawking at him. “You got me a house?”
He nodded, obviously pleased with your reaction.
“You’re jesting,” you managed to say in disbelief, “Anthony you—surely you’re jesting.”
“I’m not and it’s all yours darling,” he assured you with a small laugh. “Waiting for you in Paris, whenever you want to visit.”
Your jaw dropped.
“In Paris?” you asked and all of a sudden you realized why the house looked familiar.
“Wait a moment,” you whispered after a beat, looking at the sketches again. “Wait, Anthony this house—”
“You told me about the street you grew up in,” he said with a soft smile. “And apparently, one of the houses there was put on sale around the time we got betrothed.”
Happy tears rushed into your eyes and a sob climbed up your throat as you flung yourself to him, wrapping your arms around his neck. He lifted you up, holding you tight and you let out a teary giggle when he put you down, then you pulled back to look up at him.
“I thought—” you wiped at your eyes in a haste, “I feared it was coming true…”
“What was coming true, sweeting?”
“That you were losing your love for me,” you admitted. “The way we have been pretending.”
He scoffed a chuckle. “What?”
“It doesn’t matter—”
“No wait,” he told you. “Tell me. What made you think that?”
You swallowed thickly and bit on your lip.
“This morning,” you said. “You left in a hurry, so I thought perhaps all this deception was somehow affecting your feelings for me, that it was making you love me less.”
A look of realization dawned on his face and he cupped your cheek, caressing over your cheekbone with his thumb.
“Darling, nothing could make me love you less,” he said. “And all this deception is just that. A deception for the ton, not each other.”
You entwined your fingers with his, heaving a sigh.
“And as for this morning,” he said. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t aware that it would make you think that. I left in a haste because if the staff saw me in your room…”
“I know,” you said slowly. “I just miss you, that’s all.”
“I miss you too,” he said, nudging your nose with his, making you giggle. “But you know what I thought of?”
“What?”
“After this whole act is over,” he said. “We can go to Paris and see if the house fits your taste. Like a second honeymoon?”
You beamed at him. “Really?”
“Mm hm,” he clicked his tongue. “That is if I’m invited.”
“Oh if you’re invited?”
“It’s your house after all.”
You hummed, pretending to think about it.
“Well I suppose I can grant you that favor,” you teased him before the thought flashed in your mind and you held you breath, “Can I decorate it?”
“It’s yours my love, you can do whatever you want with it.”
You covered your mouth to hide your gleeful squeal, bouncing on the balls of your feet before you tugged him down by his shirt so that you could kiss him. His arms sneaked around your waist as the familiar desire burst through you, and you pulled back to shoot him a mischievous smile.
“Would they hear us do you think?” you asked, nodding in the direction of the door and he smirked at you, then lifted you up to sit you down on the desk, making you giggle.
“How quiet can you be?”
“I don’t know,” you said, almost shrugging your shoulders in a nonchalant manner before you wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him closer. “Let’s find out.”
                                               *
The next day you had woken up much better than earlier, and you had to try especially hard not to let anything slip in front of the staff. Even though you wanted to skip on your steps and hum a song, you knew you were supposed to pretend to be upset, so after Anthony had woken you up with kisses and left to meet Frederick, you took a long bath and spent your entire day going over the preparations for the ball. You had yet another meeting with another vendor and you and Lucie met him in the yard so that you could talk to him about the scenery in garden.
“So what I mean is, Mr. Kilby, I want the yard’s setting to be the complete opposite of the ballroom’s setting,” you said. “The ballroom will be more focusing on soft and pleasant things symbolizing virtues, the yard on the other hand will symbolize vices, so anything dark and dangerous.”
“I understand my lady,” he said. “I’ve heard you’re putting a small fountain in the ballroom to mimic a waterfall?”
“Yes, and it will be surrounded by a decoration of flowers all around the ballroom,” you said. “I still cannot understand how exactly that fountain works, the vendor kindly explained yesterday but…”
He smiled at you. “You have your expertise, we have ours my lady.”
“That is why I’m not questioning it,” you joked, smiling back. “So for the garden, I want the opposite of it. While the ballroom is to look peaceful and ethereal, the yard should look like—”
“A den of vices.”
“Precisely,” you said. “And I’m told that your fireworks are absolutely the best in the country, and I was hoping you could help me.”
“It’d be my honor, my lady.”
“I want the theme to be fire in the yard,” you said. “Something big and loud, and intimidating.”
“I have the right product for that,” he said. “How long do you want the firework show to last?”
“Around half an hour, so that all guests can see it on their way in.”
“Half an hour…” he murmured to himself, scribbling something on his notebook before he nodded to himself and ripped the paper to give it to you.”
“The number of fireworks and the price my lady,” he said. “If you’d like to show it to Viscount Bridgerton as well.”
You took a look at the number and nodded. “I’d like to put in the order now actually.”
“Of course my lady,” he said. “I’ll start working on them when I get back to my shop. And if I may suggest something?”
“Certainly Mr. Kilby, please.”
“There’s a circus in town as you’ve probably read about,” he said and you nodded. “I did business with them last year, so they know me. How would you feel about having fire breathers in the yard, as a part of the performance as well?”
You gasped, pressing a hand over your chest. “Oh my goodness, I would love that!”
Lucie cleared her throat and shot you a look, and you heaved a sigh before turning to Mr. Kilby again.
“And is it completely safe, Mr. Kilby?”
“Yes my lady, I can assure you it’s very safe,” he said. “If you’d like, I can talk to them and come back tomorrow with their director around this time?”
“Oh I appreciate that so much,” you said. “And please know that Viscount Bridgerton and I will make sure to recompense for your help in fixing this meeting as well.”
“You’re very generous my lady, thank you,” he said and walked away from you and Lucie raised her brows at you.
“Fire breathing?”
“Just imagine it Lucie!” you motioned at the yard. “The ton will go insane!”
“The ton will go insane when they see your gown my lady, I doubt you should set someone on fire to make it certain.”
“It’s safe!”
“It’s fire!”
You waved a hand in the air. “It’ll be fun, I promise.”
“If a lady or lord that I don’t like catches fire, I’m not going to help you extinguish it,” Lucie pointed out and you held up your hands.
“Fine, I’ll ask someone else to throw water on them,” you said. “Happy?”
“Very.”
You let out a laugh and linked your arm with hers.
“Great,” you said. “Now come with me to the kitchen, I need your opinion on the dessert options.”
For the rest of the day, you had been so busy that you had barely gotten the time sit down. It felt as if you were running everywhere, and it was only around dinner time that you felt like you could stop working on the ball. Anthony was still outside, so you had dinner alone and once it was over, you insisted Lucie to join you for a glass of port in your bedroom before going to bed.
The last thing you remembered before falling into a deep slumber was that you so desperately wished for Anthony to be there beside you, and that was why when you woke up to his soft kiss on your neck, his pleasant scent filling your nostrils, you were half convinced that it was a dream.
“Anthony?” you mumbled, your eyes fluttering open to find him sitting there on the bedside, his fingers slowly caressing your hair. “What time is it?”
“Three in the morning.”
“You just got home?”
“Yeah,” he said. “But I have a good excuse. I had to make sure.”
You rubbed your eyes, still trying to wake up. “Make sure of what?”
“That we had what we needed,” he said, his smile widening. “Y/N?”
“Hm?”
“I got it.”
You furrowed your brows. “You got what?”
“A land contract with Frederick’s signature on it,” he said, his words washing away every trace of sleep from you, and he reached inside his waistcoat pocket to pull out a paper. “I got it.”
You sat up straight in bed, your heart beating in your ears. “He signed it?”
“He signed it.”
You snatched the paper from his hand to look at it, your eyes darting over the lines as you covered your mouth.
“How?”
“Well, we drank some and I brought up your mother and her divorce,” he said. “And how I needed a new house to send you away after divorce away from London, and… he had this ready, and he tried to feed me some nonsense story about how the name in here belonged to a friend of his, and how purchasing this land would be good for me. I told him I would look it over tomorrow when I sobered up.”
You let out a breath. “Oh my God.”
“I know, and I wasn’t even tipsy. Who could’ve known all that drinking with Eli would actually pay off? My tolerance is extremely high at this point.”
You blinked a couple of times, still holding the paper tight as if it could disappear any moment.
“We have the proof,” you whispered. “Anthony, we have the proof!”
He nodded and you hugged him tight, unable to stop the smile on your face before you kissed him.
“I love you so much.”
“I love you too darling,” he murmured, caressing your cheekbone. “See? It’s over now. No more of this silly deception, or fake arguments or sleeping in different rooms. I’ll get it to the court tomorrow, and by nighttime he will be away from you forever, punished for his crimes.”
You looked down at the paper, then furrowed your brows, your thoughts like a storm in your head.
“When you give it to the court,” you said. “It takes them a day then?”
“Well, he’s an earl and forgery and fraud is a capital crime,” he said. “So it will take them less than usual, I’m guessing a day. Why?”
You nibbled on your lip and looked up at him.
“If he’s captured tomorrow, not enough people will see it.”
“It will hit the papers very fast darling.”
“Yes but—” you said, gritting your teeth. “He dragged my mother’s name through the mud in front of the whole ton, Anthony. He deserves to go through the same.”
Anthony tilted his head. “Do you want him captured in public then?”
“Do you think he’d get suspicious if you stalled him a couple days more?”
Anthony shook his head. “No, not really. I can just tell him I’m drafting my appeal for divorce to the parliament, that’s why I didn’t get the chance to contact my accountant to buy the land yet. Why? What do you have in mind?”
You smiled slightly.
“Well, the ball is only days away,” you said. “And the whole ton will be there, and most importantly my whole family will be there. I think we all deserve to see him dragged out like the traitor he is.”
“You want him captured at the ball?”
You nodded your head. “Yes. It’s already a celebration, I don’t see why we can’t make it a celebration for two occasions. Our love and my revenge.”
Anthony chuckled. “If that’s what you want,” he said. “Yeah. I can give it to the court in the morning of the ball, and to make it better I can give them the exact place he will be that night.”
You tilted your head at the paper before meeting Anthony’s dark gaze.
“Good because I want the whole ton to see when he gets what he deserves,” you muttered, your smile widening. “And I want to enjoy that view from a good spot.”
Chapter 47
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