#i barely wanted to go to this mornings shift.. i certainly didn’t want to go tonight

[theemporium]

[1.6k] in which a flower bouquet arrives at your door that certainly wasn't sent by your boyfriend. (based off this request)

series masterlist

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In your defence, you had nothing to do with the prank. 

It had taken a while for Luke to come around to the idea of you and Quinn being together. He loved you both, wanted nothing more than two of his favourite people in the world to be happy. But it still took some time to get used to the shift in relationships considering almost a year ago the two of you barely spoke. 

But all things considered, he was doing much better than you expected—except for one thing. 

Luke had deemed it necessary that his brother proved himself worthy of dating his best friend. 

You thought he was joking. Quinn thought he was being dramatic. And Jack thought it was the funniest thing he had ever heard, meaning he totally enabled his younger brother into taking the whole thing seriously. 

You had expected Luke to give his oldest brother a shovel talk. Maybe threaten him a little. Maybe even whine about it a little longer, because honestly he got over that phase a lot quicker than you expected. 

You hadn’t expected a series of trials to be set up for your boyfriend.

It started off with random questions thrown at Quinn at the most unsuspecting times, ways for Luke to see if his older brother really knew you. He asked about your favourite colour, your favourite snacks, what you liked when you were sad and so many more simple questions that had Quinn rolling his eyes as he answered. 

Then, it escalated to throwing random scenarios. Like what Quinn would do if you were stranded and he was halfway across the country. Or what Quinn would do if you had been abducted by aliens and returned with no memory of him. Or what Quinn would do if you decided to become a diehard Leafs fan.

It was annoying for Quinn, but ultimately it was harmless. 

You hadn’t realised there was another test. You hadn’t realised you inspired it when you were on the phone with Luke a couple of weeks ago. 

It became a staple in your relationship for Quinn to send you a bouquet of flowers. It was his little way of showing he cared, of showing that distance wasn’t going to get in between him showing his love for you. It was sweet and it made your heart swoon and he fucking adored the way you always called him as soon as they arrived, sharing your reaction to his chosen bouquet each time.

So, in all honesty, it was no shock to you when a bouquet had been delivered to your door that morning. You hadn’t bothered to look for a note because you knew who it was from, you knew that Quinn would probably walk out of your room and see the flowers and throw some stupid, cheesy line at you that had your body flushing. 

“What the fuck?”

It never occurred to you that Quinn was never the one who sent them. 

He stumbled out of your room around thirty minutes after you initially woke up, his eyes still tired and bleary from sleep. He was dragging his feet along the floor as he walked, a pair of sweatpants halfheartedly thrown on as he went off to find you and try to drag you back to bed. After all, it wasn’t often he got the chance to visit you during the season. Spending that limited time together in bed sounded ideal to him. 

However, his body was wide fucking awake the second he walked into the kitchen and saw an unfamiliar bouquet of flowers sat on the counter.

You turned to look at him, your smile waning a little when you noticed his pissed off expression. “Jesus, I know you’re bad before coffee in the mornings but I’ve never seen you this grumpy.” 

Quinn ignored the jab, nodding towards the flowers. “Who sent you those?” 

Your brows furrowed in confusion. “What? You did?”

Quinn frowned as he turned to look at you. “No, I didn’t. I chose tulips. Those aren’t tulips.” 

You shot him a blank look, very well aware the huge bouquet of red roses were not tulips. 

“Maybe you forgot what you chose,” you told him with a shrug, taking a step towards him so you could wind your arms around his waist. You felt him lean into the embrace, wrapping one arm around you as the other reached towards the flowers. “You can’t remember what you’ve chosen every single time.”

“I do,” Quinn said bluntly like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Of course he remembered which flowers he sent you. The boy spent more time than he cared to admit choosing a bouquet, trying to imagine which ones you’d like the most. 

“Oh,” you murmured, but there was a cheesy grin making its way on your face as you placed a quick peck to his collarbone. “Petey was right, you’re such a sap.”

“I still don’t know how I feel about this newfound friendship between you and Petey,” Quinn grumbled when he noticed a note tucked between the stems of the flowers. He reached for it, a frown on his face as his eyes glanced over the note. “Who’s George?” 

You blinked, pulling your head back. “I don’t know a George.” 

Quinn’s expression darkened. “Well, some creep called George knows you and is now sending you flowers.” 

“What?” You grumbled as you reached for the note.

pretty flowers for a pretty girl  –george xx

You blinked. “What the fuck?”

Quinn’s eyes narrowed at the bouquet of flowers, his arm tightening around you like he was proving a point. “They are a terrible set of roses anyways. Red is so tacky. What the fuck does George think it is, Valentine’s Day? He has shitty taste.” 

“I—” You turned to your boyfriend. “Some random guy has my address and is sending me shit, and your priority is his taste in bouquets?” 

“I’m just saying,” Quinn grumbled with a shrug of his shoulders. “He isn’t gonna win you over with some measly roses.” 

You shook your head in response. “Babe, you are—” 

RING! RING! RING!

The two of you froze for a short moment, glancing at each other as your phone’s ringing continued to echo through your small kitchen. There was a moment of hesitation before Quinn reached for it, shoulders tensed like he was expecting to see some unknown number on your screen.

His body visibly relaxed when he saw it was a facetime call from Luke.

He handed you the phone, settling in behind you with his arms still wound around you like he was unwilling to let go of you anytime soon. He hooked his chin on your shoulder, leaning his head against yours as you answered the call.

“Oh. Ew.” 

You rolled your eyes but smiled fondly at your best friend. “Is there a reason you’re calling me before ten? I’m surprised you’re even awake right now.”

“Just wanted to check in,” Luke said, his eyes narrowed like he was analysing something. “Hm. You look quite calm there, Quinn.”

Quinn startled a little, lifting his head. “Did you expect me not to be calm when you called?” 

“I was hoping you’d be in some caveman-ish jealous fit of rage. I had the boys on standby to make sure you didn’t tear the college down.” 

You blinked in confusion. 

“Are you George?” Quinn asked, frowning at his youngest brother’s grinning face.

“No, Quinn, my name is Luke.”

He narrowed his eyes. “You’re a little shit.” 

“What the hell, Luke?” You asked, sighing deeply at whatever your best friend was about to say. You already knew whatever the reason was—most likely encouraged by Jack, again—was going to be too much for your brain to handle this early in the morning. 

“What? I told you I was testing him!” Luke said, like it was the only defence he needed. “The note was hidden in the flowers to make sure he would go looking for it! I wanted to make sure he was putting in the effort with you, if he actually cared about the weird flower thing or if he would just pretend like it was fine.” 

You blinked. “You’re insane,” you said eventually, pausing for a short moment before you continued. “And it’s not a weird flower thing.” 

“I’m going to kill you when I next see you,” Quinn said, glaring at his little brother who looked far too smug for his own good. “And I’m going to shove these roses so far—”

“Talk to you later, bye!” 

You sighed, shaking your head as you let out a breathless laugh. You turned your head, finding Quinn still frowning and glowering, and gently turned his face so you could kiss him. “He’ll get tired of these tests eventually.” 

“Will he though?” Quinn muttered against your lips, his nose brushing against yours. “I swear his next test will be to tattoo your name across my forehead.”

You snorted. “If you do that, I’m breaking up with you.”

“That’s rude,” he mused and, for the first time since he woke up, a hint of a smile was tugging on his lips. “What if I do it on my own accord? Maybe I just want to prove my love for you, baby.”

“I like your pretty face. I’d rather not be staring at my own name whenever I look at it,” you retorted, watching as a full smile spread across his face as he leaned down to kiss you again. 

“Cute,” he murmured before he pulled back completely, a determined glint in his eyes that you knew well. “C’mon, get ready.” 

Your brows furrowed. “What? Where are we going?”

“To burn those flowers and then grab breakfast,” he answered simply.

“Quinn—”

“I refuse to look at them any longer, babe, they are atrocious.”

“You’re so dramatic.” 

“It’s a Hughes thing.”

.

#quinn hughes #nhl #vancouver canucks #quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes x you #quinn hughes x y/n #quinn hughes fic #quinn hughes one shot #nhl x reader #nhl x you #nhl x y/n #nhl fic #nhl one shot

[aluciahaz]

Omfggg ur writing is SO unbelievably good i love it sm 😭🙏🙏

I got kind of a prompt for a sub!vox x gn (maybe afab) reader ✨ Okay so what if, since we all know vox is OBVIOUSLY a bratty bottom, the reader fucks the brattiness out of him? And he goes from trying to be a dom, to resistant bottom, to bratty bottom, to just begging to come with all his life, maybe even crying cuz the reader won’t let him

TYSM!!!! im glad you think my writing’s good ❤️ALSO FINALLY A VOX REQ AGHH

i have like 50094949 drafts for like all of the other stuff in my inbox but i just have to write this vox fic first ok im self indulgent i apologize 😭

—vox x gn!reader

—includes : sub!vox, dom!reader, light bondage, edging

vox is so obvious.

he clearly has a thing for control. a need, a desire. it was practically his core personality trait. yet, he’s most certainly not made to wield it.

sure, he can try and sweet talk you, saying sultry things and bragging about his power in order to get you to feel below his level. but you know how frail that persona is. a single slip up, and it would all come crashing down into deafening static.

which, was almost impressively easy to do.

his claw-like fingers runs up your neck, one of them stopping at your cheek as he smirked. if he wasn’t careful, he could fuck up and draw blood. he was tip-toeing the small line here.

a small line that if he crossed, you’d switch up this silly little game immediately, taking the control of the show and making him the contestant.

live only for you.

but, you entertain his farce of dominance, a smile playing on your lips as you see what he has in store…if he had anything, that is.

“you’ve been waiting for me all day, haven’t you?” he asks, clearly rhetorical as he caresses your cheek gently, his voice steady as he speaks. he leads you down to the bed with teeth raking your neck as he crawls over you. there’s something fun about watching him try and fluster you, to get you to say the things he wants. but you were no people pleaser.

“perhaps. unfortunately i can’t say the same for you,” you respond, your smile forming into more of a smirk at the ends of your lips as your hands snake around his delicate waist, tightening around it like a corset.

you can already see the hesitation in his eyes, the brief moment of surprise at your sudden grasp. it was too easy to surprise this man. it’s a wonder he hasn’t exploded yet.

“what do you mean by that?” he asks, his eyebrows furrowing in both nervousness and curiosity, almost like he didn’t want to know. the fingers on your cheek seem to barely just get too rough as he looked at you.

“don’t act like i didn’t hear you in the office this morning, moaning my name like some prayer,” you mock, your knee slotting between his legs with ease. vox keels over at the sudden feeling, a sharp gasp getting punched out of his system with little effort.

“impatient.”

“what’s the big deal? am i not allowed to jerk off anymore?” he complains, bringing himself back up to his hand and knees over you as he glares with indignation.

“i told you to wait.”

“and i don’t remember needing to!” vox snarled, the grasp on your face tightening until you saw him pull it away, a droplet of blood adorning his finger.

simply unacceptable.

instantly, with a loud yelp of complaint and confusion, he hits the mattress with a thud, cursing in annoyance as he looks up at you. his face, once filled with irritation, shifted into one of almost astonished fear as he gazed upon your expression, cold and unforgiving.

“i’ll make you remember.”

his screen flickers before going back to normal, his face scrunched up in anger as he spat out his unwise words.

“i’d like to see you try.”

so, try you did.

his hands were cuffed with plush handcuffs to the bed-frame—you know he wouldn’t be able to handle real ones—and of course since he was never good with self-control, he had a cock ring on as a ‘treat’.

you’re delighted by how much of a fight he puts up though. considering how fragile his ego is, you were sure that he’d melt into your hands the moment you bound him to the bed.

“this is your plan?” vox rolled his eyes, watching you pour lubricant on your fingers with an unimpressed look. “not very impressive. you’ll need more—ngh! shit! give a guy some warning—!”

“beggars can’t be choosers.”

“i don’t fucking beg—!”

“you will.”

there was no mercy from that point forth. one finger after the other, shocks of electricity would course through his veins, mouth agape as your quick hand inside kept making him feel sparks of pleasure through his entire body.

“let me—cum! ass—zz—hole!” he shouted, tugging at the handcuffs to no avail. he wanted to touch himself so bad, yet you were adamant.

“if you ask nicely, maybe,” you tell him, circling your fingers before pressing deep onto that electric spot again, making him cry out in frustration and enjoyment.

all he could do was shoot you a disgusted look before yelling once more, kicking the blanket underneath him in exasperation. his anguish crackled through his veins like a current, trying to fight the urge to just submit.

but it was all too much. he was weak, even if he convinces all of hell that he’s not, he wouldn’t be able to fool you. the bucks of your fingers were replaced with the movement of your hips, making him wail for more.

an hour had passed, and his indignant claims of “i don’t feel anything!” or “you’ll never get me to beg!” shifted into more pleasant glitching screams of “don’t stop!” and “please, more!”

finally, he was using his manners.

“let me cum—ple—zz—se! i c-can’t—!” vox cried out as you quicken the pace, thrashing underneath you with his legs now wrapped around your waist, holding for dear life as you drive into him.

“i—hic—mm! ‘m s—zz—sorry! ‘msorry-AH! sorry!” his back curves off the bed as he squirms, crying in earnest now. tears fell his face with broken pixels blinking in and out underneath, his screen cutting at random points to an error warning from the overstimulation.

“pathetic,” you spit out, your hands digging into his hips as you practically manhandled the man, making him move once he lost all the energy to match your movements. “you listen to me. you do what i say, and you don’t talk back.”

you hear him shriek desperately as you grab his cock, red and weeping as you overwhelm him with pleasure, but never letting him over the edge.

“do you understand? you’re mine.”

you run your finger underneath his tip, and you see him glitch out into an expression you truly loved.

his screen was tear stained and his were graphics broken, yet it was clear enough to see the hypnotizing hearts that pulsated in his eyes as he yelled in defeat, small whimpers leaving his ruined throat as he babbled on and on.

“yours! your—yours! ngh—! please! pl—let me cum! plea—zz—oh, FUCK!”

his whole body trembles from need like electricity burned his skin. his legs fall from your waist, too weak to hold them around you anymore, yet you catch them, pushing the underside of his thighs until he was folded in half.

“cum for me then.”

instantly, vox does as you say as you slip the cock ring off of him, his wails loud enough to shake the room as he finds his release. his screen completely blanks out for a second as a shock flitters around his wrists, frying the cuffs and making them break into two before slumping back down to the bed.

you can’t even scold him for letting his powers go rampant before he pulls you over him, wrapping his arms around you as he sniffles into your ear.

“thank you—hic—thank…thank…”

this big baby. you sigh, rubbing your hands on his sides gently as you kiss his cheek. “yeah, yeah. just remember this the next time you think about acting out, okay?” you said quietly, feeling him nod into your shoulder as he starts to slowly relax.

but as per usual, he apparently forgets what you taught him in the next week.

fortunately, you’re a patient teacher. and you’ll remind him again and again about the lessons he foolishly dismisses.

sorry that this is shit 💀 i tried my best but the writing juices arent flowing this week😭 hopefully this weekend i wont have writer’s block and will blast through all yall’s reqs!! trust me, im working on them <3

tags: @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx @drlucichen @mvskedxrtist

#hazbin hotel #dom reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel dom reader #sub hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin vox #bottom vox #sub vox

[gretavanlace]

Sugar II (part 9)

Jake Kiszka x reader

18+ only! Minors do not interact!

Warnings: graphic sexual content, angst, language, the tiniest amount of alcohol consumption, digital penetration, masturbation, oral sex (fem rec), anal play, unprotected sex, etc

Okay, sweet peas, we’ve got one more chapter to go (maaaaybe two idk), but all your favorites will be back! Plus an epilogue. Thank you so much for sticking with me after I did sugar jake so dirty the first time around ❤️

The air is lush and fragrant with herbs, sizzling eggs, and Jake when you wake - though his side of the bed has already cooled.

He’s all around you. Clothes and scuffed boots tossed about the room. Guitar case propped open sans Gibson - where has she gone? The scent of his skin clinging to yours. The gentle bustle of him milling around in the kitchen. You roll over and shamelessly bury your face in the pillow he rested his pretty head upon last night. Drawing him in with a shiver of content…he is home and you are basking in the comfort that is the great return.

He’s humming something to himself, and though you can barely hear - and you certainly can’t place the song - you try to hum along, laughing quietly to yourself when it comes out sounding muddled and strange as you search for a melody you don’t know.

It doesn’t matter. If he’s humming, you want to hum along. You’d like to walk beside him always, twisted and tangled together like a silken braid of devotion.

Seduced by his silly siren’s song, your feet hit the floor as you search for something to throw on. You settle on the black blazer he’s tossed over the back of a chair and pad down the hallway. Lulled and lured by his quiet chaos.

You find him, back to the doorway, gingerly shaking a pan with one hand and tossing what looks to be diced veggies with the other, totally at ease and at home. A gorgeous, disheveled chef complete with yesterday’s sweats, t shirt that’s torn at the neck, and tangled hair.

Should you stand and watch him awhile? It sounds tempting…to watch him work, a sneaky, head over heels fly on the wall. The way he moves, every shift of muscle is intoxicating. Yes, you are bewitched, but even standing here bathed in his presence, you miss him, and that wins out.

”Morning, Jakey,” you smile, breaking his concentration.

”There’s my sugar,” he tosses you a look over his shoulder that stops your heart. “I’m making you breakfast, my love. Would you like coffee or tea?”

Bare feet dancing over chilled tile, you wrap your arms around his waist and rest your cheek between his shoulder blades, “Whatever you’re having.”

He backs up a little, no doubt worrying about your arms - though they are protected by his jacket - being too near to the stove, and turns, pulling you closer while walking you backwards towards the island, “How about we share a cup of tea? You hungry?”

Flashes of memories burn through your brain…last night, in the foyer wrapped up together on the floor while he kissed your body and wept. On the couch while you talked about how exactly this all might work. Later, in a bed that wasn’t yours, in sheets you wouldn’t wash.

You should be thoroughly sated, but yes…you are hungry.

”How’d I get so lucky, little girl?” His lips curve into a grin that derails your thoughts and replaces them with something much softer. Your heart is weak for the look in his eyes…the unapologetic, worshipful love that blazes there. “How did I manage to earn this?”

”Earn what?” You smile back, praying that the emotion pounding in your heart is as evident in your gaze as it is in his, “Us?”

His eyes duck away with a shy nod, “I just never thought I’d have you like this again. In my arms, not going anywhere. Staying.”

Your fingertips are at his cheeks, sweeping over the perfect warmth of his skin, soft as air, “Jake, you didn’t earn anything. You’ve always held my heart.”

Still unwilling to meet your gaze, he rests his forehead on your shoulder. “You took it away.”

”No,” you argue in a hush. Can he really not see? “I left it with you. You’re the only reason it beats, anyway. But if you don’t feed me soon, I fear I may perish.”

”Drama queen.” He grins, pecking your cheeks each in turn, grateful that you’ve eased his mind and calmed his tender nerves.

The kettle begins to scream and you patter off to the table tucked into the corner, homey and quaint, to watch him work to take care of you. Soon, you’re gifted a steaming mug along with another kiss dropped atop your head. “Splash of rum and a sprinkle of cinnamon, sugar. It’s 9 o’clock in the morning, you lush.”

”Trying to get me drunk so you can take advantage of me, Jake?” You tease back, watching as he moves to finish things up at the stove, throat seizing with aching affection…he remembers how you take your tea.

”I don’t have to get you inebriated for that,” he sounds gravelly and full of himself, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. “I could fuck you however and wherever I so felt the inclination, my lovely little doll, and you would grace me with your gracious and enthusiastic appreciation.”

You bat your lashes wildly at him as he presents two plates heaped with brightly colored, expertly sautéed vegetables and fluffy, scrambled eggs like cheery, sunny clouds. A bowl of swollen, fuschia raspberries deposited between your plates like a pile of sweetened jewels steals the show. “Oh, be still my heart…you know how I enjoy it when you speak like a dictionary.”

”I know, sugar,” there’s that beaming smile of his again as he offers you a berry, lightly teasing it at your lips until you open up for him. “plenty more where that came from.”

A comfortable quiet sparks to life as you both dig in and pass the teacup back and forth. He finally breaks it, speaking up around a bite of potatoes and peppers. “I spoke to Josh this morning.”

”And how is your missing piece?” You quirk an eyebrow over the top of the cup you have now commandeered.

He leans back in his chair and settles his gaze upon you, clocking your expression closely, searching for a reaction. “Obnoxious as ever. He’s annoyed with me because I haven’t looked over the lyric revisions he sent me, and I certainly couldn’t care less if I actively tried. However, he’s very excited to see you. Cross though he might be with his dear brother.”

”Hello, Oliver,” you wink, “Let’s have Jacob back, shall we?”

You haven’t forgotten Jake’s tendency for trotting out Mr. Reed when he’s dipping a toe or two into the waters of vulnerability.

“Do you miss him?” He asks quietly, “Do you want things to be the way they were before? Because I can live with that if it means you’ll stay.” He rushes on as if he fears he may lose his nerve. “I want you to be happy, whatever it takes, I just want you to be happy.”

Fork clinking lightly against your plate as your focus zeros in on his lovely face, you lean forward and reach for his hand “Did he tell you he came to see me? After I ran into Danny that day?”

His fingers slip into your waiting palm with a soft squeeze, “He mentioned that he found you and asked you hide away until we’d gone. I’ve never wanted to hurt him as badly as I did then. Not even when we were young and stupid. Not even that night, when he forced me to let you go.”

“He was only trying to protect you, jake.” Your head tilts, watching residual pain flare to life in his eyes. “I’ve done a great many things to hurt you, it’s a wonder he doesn’t hate me for it.”

“He could never hate you, sugar. Don’t say things like that, it would break his heart to hear them.” The conviction in his words is fierce, and that makes sense…they share a life force at times, it seems.

“He did ask me to hide away, yes…” you nod, wrapping your free hand around his knuckles, warming his touch with your own, “But did he tell you anything else about our visit? Did he tell you how easy it was for us? How we caught up and laughed and looked at each other like very old friends that had been lost to each other for too many years?”

His shoulders tense as though he’s bracing for a gentle impact, but on you march, whispering to him in this unfamiliar kitchen that feels fat full of love.

”Did he tell you that it didn’t even hurt, our being in the same room with everything so fucking different? Did he know that all I could do was sit there, falling silently apart and searching for you in his eyes?”

“But you loved him.” Now it’s his turn to search your eyes, but for what you’re not sure. “I don’t want you to have to tamp that out. Not ever. You love so beautifully, sugar. I can share.”

”I did love him,” you nod. “Very much. A long time ago. I love him still. Differently. And not the way I love you. I have never loved anyone the way I love you. You don’t have to share. Not anymore.”

His grip is pulling at you now, tugging you to your feet and into his arms, creaking the worn wood of his chair beneath the weight of you both as he buries his face into your bare chest, hiding his tears in the lapels of his blazer as he weeps into your skin.

“Shh, baby,” you soothe, stroking through his hair, holding onto him as he clings to you as if you might vanish like a sigh.

His face tilts upward, lips brushing over your chin and jaw, licking and tasting you through his tears. “I love you, sugar. Sometimes I feel like all this love I have for you is just going to break me into pieces, like I can’t hold it all inside. There’s no room for it. I’m too small.”

”Jake,” you feel like you could break into pieces right alongside him as he begins tugging his jacket away from your shoulders.

He shakes his head, hushing you silently, “So, I’m going to take all this love and I’m going to give it all to you. And I’m gonna fill our house with it, press it into the walls and let it seep into the floorboards. Every nail and every window is going to feel it. The pipes and hinges. The chimney is going to breathe it into the night when we light fires in the winter. And we’re going to have babies and I’m going to love them just as much, and I can’t wait to watch you love them…”

You feel baptized in his tears and the wet, warm press of his mouth as he tattoos beautiful promises into your flesh. How could you ever have believed that you wanted anything other than this?

“I’m going to exist for you every single day, sugar…” a sob escapes him, though he tries so hard to bite it back, “I already do…I always have.”

“I know, baby…it’s okay,” you’re kissing adoration into his hair, combing your fingers through the tangles, coddling him and cooing the softest endearments, desperate to mollify his soul, fraught to offer him peace. “Please don’t cry, jakey. You know I can’t stand it.”

Hearing his own words lilting off of your tongue, he pauses and gazes up into your eyes like he sees everything he’ll ever need in them, “When I said that to you, I wanted to disappear. I wanted to be…gone. I didn’t want to live in a world where you wore his ring on your finger with tears in your eyes. Will you miss him?”

Should you lie? Perhaps. But wouldn’t he see the untruths lying bare? Wouldn’t that hurt even worse? Your deception?

“Yes,” you nod, petting him as he presses in closer, “he was kind to me, and sweet. He made me laugh. He made me half-way happy enough to pretend. I’ll miss him sometimes…but never enough to look back and regret chasing after you.”

“I’m glad he was kind to you,” he whispers, kissing a drunken, winding path across the tops of your breasts, “you deserve kind. He loved you, I could see that. I didn’t want to, but I could. And maybe I hated that, but I would have hated the alternative so much more. I’m sure he loves you still.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” you laugh softly, “he wasn’t very pleased with me.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, sugar,” he stares up at you with eyes laced heavily in adulation, “you don’t leave a man alone so easily. You linger and overstay your welcome in the worst way. Learn to leave a room, sweetheart.”

He has pulled another laugh out of you, louder and bell like this time…it twists his heart with heated, pulsing adoration.

”Jake,” you pause, waiting for him to give you his honey brown eyes, “You were right when you said none of it matters. This matters.” Your palm finds your heartbeat for a moment, and then his own.

”I know, my love…” tears skate along his lash line like blissful, shimmering quartz, “I know.”

~

His mouth is at your throat, gentle hand splaying out across your abdomen, holding you down against the cool, polished wood of the table.

Fingers playing at your lips, he breaks a raspberry apart between his fingers before sweeping it over your waiting tongue. “You’re so beautiful, sugar. Aren’t you? Aren’t you my pretty, pretty girl?”

His shirt has landed on the tile, forgotten and worthless to this task at shaking hand.

“Yes,” nails digging into his shoulders to remind him of where you’ve been, of where your touch belongs, you nod fervently beneath his kiss, “I’m your pretty girl, Jakey. I’m your girl.”

Lips beginning a path up your cheek to your temple, he hums euphorically and grasps at your ankles, tugging gingerly until your heels are resting on the table. “Will you show me?” His voice is silken and inquisitive, tongue fluttering over your earlobe to bring chills to life inside you. “Hmm? Will you show me how pretty you are for me?”

”Anything,” you pant, arching away from the table, desperate to be closer to him as he pulls back.

You watch on, body throbbing and screaming for him while he pops a raspberry into his mouth and settles back into his chair, legs spread wide, hands fisted into flexing balls at his knees, “Touch yourself for me, sugar. Rub your sweet little clit, nice and slow, just for me.”

Maybe you’d like to say your body protests, maybe you ought to say that you shy away, maybe if you weren’t so indescribably in love with him you’d do both of those things, but as it stands….

….as it stands, you give him what he’s asked for without thought. There isn’t a breath of hesitation. You simply roll two fingers over your tongue, reach down between your thighs, and begin.

The hushed moan that tumbles off the tip of your tongue tugs a sigh from his lungs that sets you further on fire. He sounds so beautiful, so wholly under a spell that you can’t fathom having the ability to cast over this deity of a man.

“There’s my good girl,” he is so quiet, you’d scarcely hear him were your focus not so completely honed in on jake jake jake, “Does that feel good, little girl? Is my sugar making that pretty pink pussy feel just so nice?”

He is an obscene angel staring you down with snarled hair and wicked sin in his wild eyes.

A trembling sound is all you’re able to manage as your touch dips inside yourself to draw slick back up to your clit.

”Yeah?” he tilts his head, watching you reverently, “It looks like it does. You’re dripping all over the table. I want to lick it up.”

“Please,” your fingers circle faster, but something is missing. He, close though he might be, is missing.

”Please, what?” He sounds as needy and hungry as you feel. “Tell me what you want me to do to you and I’ll do it, baby. Whatever you want…I’ll fucking do it.”

”Your mouth,” your legs spread wider until your hips protest, and then you spread a little wider in offering. “I’d like to have your mouth please, Jakey. Please. lick me, please, please.”

A groan rumbles out of his chest like pained thunder as he wraps his arms around your thighs, tugging you in and burying his mouth exactly where you’ve so politely begged for it. Another anguished sound pushes from his lungs as he drinks down his first mouthful of you.

The tip of his tongue teases over your shivering clit, and then slinks down to dip inside you, and then down farther still to lap against that heavenly little spot where it shouldn’t be.

He hums against you while you whine and yank at his hair, pulling his kiss in closer as your hips lift away from the wood you’re making such a mess of.

“Fuck,” your fingers lace through his hair perhaps just a bit too tightly, but a quiet grunt signals his appreciation, “right there.”

“I know where you like my mouth every now and then, sugar,” his words are hot against you as his thumb slides, warm and thick, inside your cunt “Dirty girl.”

Watching you shy away so endearingly squeezes at his chest. You have always given yourself to him so completely. You have always been his girl. His mouth has known every breathtaking inch of your body in a hundred different lifetimes. His heart has known your heart in a thousand more.

Your fingers search out your clit, neglected and crying out for attention, completing that lovely trifecta as you rock your hips, fucking his face without shame.

He is yours and you will take him.

Your belly is burning, white hot and tight, coiling and churning as your body begins to tremble and flush.

“Gonna cum…” A complete sentence seems an impossible task “I— oh, please, please, please,”

His fingers replace his thumb with a feral growl low in his throat, tucking up in behind your clit as you watch his arm begin to move rhythmically below the table.

”Don’t cum,” you order through whimpers and whines that sound anything but authoritative. How difficult it proves to be to be bossy when his tongue is warm and wet where you shouldn’t adore it so damn much.

”I won’t,” his promise is beautifully muffled. “But I want you to do it. Cum for me, fuck doll…give it up pretty.”

You tighten deliciously around his searching tongue and delving fingers as it crawls through you like sinking into a warm bath that swirls with glittering, lilac goldfish. They kiss your skin soft as monarch wings; strange, swimming beings in the waters that are Jacob. It is lovely, though given the filth that has ushered you into this state, maybe that makes no sense.

He works you carefully until your breathing begins to stutter and gasp uncomfortably, and then there is his striking and stunning face - cheeks blazing with desire - kissing and licking up your body as you squirm languidly.

“Was that good, baby?” His teeth are dragging against the swell of your breast now, igniting a fire within you anew.

Jacob, always so cocksure and confident, sounds famished for your approval. How strange.

You hand it over willingly and honestly, on a silver platter of affection, “So, good, Jakey…I love you so much.”

“You taste like fucking candy everywhere,” his praise is little more than a whispered murmur as he buries into the crook of your neck, “I want you in my mouth and under my fingertips forever, for fucking always.”

The tip of his cock, full and hot like velvet, sweeps across your entrance, teasing inside just a breath before pulling back and then nudging in all over again.

“Put it in,” your fingers are clawing lazily at his hips, silently trying to guide him into action, “Fuck Jake, please baby, just slip it inside and—“

He grinds his hips forward, cutting you off, filling you up, pulsing and slick and hot and…

”My girl,” his words are humid at your throat as he whimpers through a physical shudder. “My sugar, my love. That’s my baby, that’s it…taking it so well. You feel so fucking good.”

His wandering fingers find and sweep over your clit with a glide as sweet as satin, and it has you clenching down around him so wildly his eyes snap shut with a furrowed brow, mouth hanging open in a silent moan.

Buried to the hilt now, those eyes lull open to stare down where your bodies connect. “Looks so pretty stretched around my cock. How’d this little cunt ever get so beautiful?”

Your cheek turns to meet the cool of the oak you're draped across, embarrassed in the most blissful way, but he is positively weak for the way his words cause your thighs to tighten around his waist.

His name begins to burn out of your lungs, smoking into the sun-soaked kitchen like a prayer.

”That’s it,” he sounds faraway, like he’s crooning to you from across the room, “My name, sugar…always my name.”

And then, there is his thumb, soaked in your need and brushing against that spot just below where his cock is dragging in and out of your cunt.

A wanton cry for more bleeds out of you, bringing forth another knit of his brow as he sinks inside you to follow the deep thrust of his cock, “‘Oh my’, right sugar? Isn’t that how my fuck doll reacts? All sweet like a lady, to being filled up so full?”

His loving, mocking tone snatches you back full circle to that very first night with him that seems so long ago…he has been all you’ve ever wanted, ever since. He is all you will ever want.

He is every direction, the night and the day, every song ever written…every poem ever wept onto pages, every star that will light the skyline tonight and all the ones that came before. He is every beat of your pulse, every breath in your lungs - and when you breathe your last, it will be his name on your lips.

White explodes behind your eyes as fireworks detonate down deep inside you, sparkling a crackling-like frenetic energy throughout your nervous system until you are tightened up and writhing with it…cumming so hard, so fucking hard, that you nearly force his beautiful cock right out of your body.

He follows your lead and pulls away, tugging at himself violently as you shower down over him like the filthiest, most exquisite drops of summer-of-love rain.

“Oh fuck, sugar, please,” he’s whining as his release lands hot and frantic against your quivering stomach, but for what, neither of you know.

You’re lost in his faraway expression, watching him fight for a deep breath as you search for your own composure when your fingers sweep through a milky ribbon painted across your navel…you want to taste him, but his grip is wrapped firmly around your wrist in an instant, with your fingers nestled against his cashmere tongue.

“I’ll clean my pretty girl up myself, if she doesn’t mind.” His mouth brushes soothingly at your hip just before he begins licking up his own release, eyes cast upwards to your own as you shake, stunned and blissfully shellshocked.

At last, you find your voice as his bubblegum pink tongue curls over the last drop, “You taste good, don’t you, Jakey?”

“Not as good as you, sugar,” His mouth is on yours now, kissing far too sweetly for what you know him to be capable of. “not even close.”

“Shower?” He pops another raspberry into your mouth and then nuzzles against your nose.

”Bath.” You correct, nearly melting into the table beneath his love.

~

A sponge, fresh out of its package and now smothered in body wash, drags across your chest as his chest rests against your back.

”We leave tonight?’ Your voice sounds unfamiliar…too content, too relaxed. It’s been such a long time since you’ve sounded this way. Since you’ve been so completely happy.

”I wish we could stay longer,” he kisses at your drenched, now squeaky clean hair, “just you and me.”

”Me too,” you sigh, settling back into his embrace even more, “but I’m also excited to see those idiots you call brothers. Especially the baby.”

”He’s missed you.” More kisses to clutch at your already stolen heart. “Nothing was the same without you, sugar. Time to come home.”

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[starrtiny]

Can't Help Myself No More

a/n this is my first fic so i hope ya'll enjoy :)) I had this idea planned but it took me almost a month to write... i hope it's worth it for y’all

summary: To put it plainly, the guy was a nerd. A hot nerd you wanted to fuck! Chris is eye candy to everyone in the office - including you. Only, he doesn't see it. He's too sweet and innocent to see the flirting and the hidden intentions of everyone around him, or is he? Maybe he's not who he seems to be... words - 6.5k general - explicit content, chan + female reader, mutual pining, colleagues to lovers, semi-public sex, he's kind of a virgin, praise + degradation kink if you squint

🎵 007 - Tabber

You let out a loud sigh and sat up in your seat as you looked at the clock on the wall across from you. It was a Friday night and way past the end of shift, but you’d been given so much work this past week that you had no choice but to work overtime. And it just so happened to be with non-other than Chris.

Most of the lights had been turned off and it was just you two left in the office. You had barely spoken to him since the start of the week and the tension lingered heavily in the room. You didn’t know why, it’s not like what you had seen was a big deal, but for some reason it still weighed on your mind and no matter what, you just couldn’t shift it.

You didn’t know how to speak to him, after all, he wasn’t the person you thought he was anymore.

No! Stop being overdramatic!

He was the same person – he just wasn’t how you perceived him to be. He wasn’t a sad loser, he wasn’t weak, and he certainly didn’t rely on you.

You were bitter.

You needed him to need you and god did it pain you to admit it.

Monday morning. You were sat at your desk, still half asleep, praying for it to be Friday already. Your ears had pricked up at the mention that Chris had arrived. Pulling your head up off the table, you groaned at the thought of him being finely polished and his cheerful self this early in the morning.

‘How are you so happy on a Monday morning?’ you had questioned him as he arrived at the desk opposite yours, placing his bag on top and wrapping his jacket around the back of his chair, your eyes hesitating on his arms as his biceps flexed.

Chris was fit. Physically.

He loved working out and you were in awe of how strong a man like him was. Chris was eye candy around the office too, and it always made you laugh at how oblivious he was too it. The younger girls were constantly bringing him snacks and drinks, offering to do the littlest things for him, twirling their hair whenever he walked by or spoke to them to turn them away (extremely politely of course).

‘They’re just being kind,’ he had always told you.

As far as you knew, Chris was single. He had been the whole time you knew him. He had never shown any interest in anyone at work either, whether he knew pretty much the entire office was hitting on him or not. It did surprise you, but in a sad way, you kind of liked it. He was hot but you also found him incredibly adorable. The way he sought your approval on every piece of work he did, even though you two were on the same level. The way he would get you anything without you needing to ask. The way he would scrunch his nose as he pushed his glasses up at the bridge…

To put it plainly, the guy was a nerd. A hot nerd you wanted to fuck!

‘Guess I’m just a morning person,’ He smiled at you, and you felt your heart melt. It happened every time and it never got old. ‘I was about to go grab coffees for everyone, you coming’?’

The sun glared in your eyes as you walked down the street, side by side next to Chris, and you could feel your face burning, cursing yourself for not putting on sunscreen that morning. You laughed with him as he attempted to shield your face, bumping into each other multiple times due to lack of vision and personal space. Anyone walking past on the street would assume you two to be a couple and it made your heart ache. You ignored the pain and forced yourself to block that idea from your head. You didn’t have a crush on him, you just didn’t object to the idea of being with him... You were just curious what it would be like… Right?

He held open the door for you as you entered to store and you watched from a distance as he ordered your drinks, oblivious to the women behind the till writing her number on his cup.

That was when it had happened.

You blamed yourself for being too obsessive.

If you weren’t insistent on hanging from his every word and move, you would have missed it. You wouldn’t be in the position you are now.

Chris had pulled his wallet from his back pocket, using his card to pay for the drinks for the office. Your eyes were caught by the light being reflected from a packet inside and your heart sank, a pit growing in your stomach making you feel more nauseous by the second.

You spent the rest of the day, the rest of the week, fighting yourself on it, deciding whether to care or not. He was a grown man after all, and it wasn’t really your business, but it was Chris. You couldn’t argue that he was extremely hot so him being with other people wouldn’t really be a surprise, but this was the man who was blissfully unaware of the flirting he received from his colleagues for two whole years.

Maybe you just wanted him to be innocent. Maybe you didn’t know him as well as you thought you did after all…

What you did know however, was that this only made you want him more!

“Have you finished for tonight?” you hear Chris utter as he looks up from his computer.

“Yeah, I think so,” you moan. “I’m not going to get very far with this tonight. I’ll have a fresh start Monday morning” you let out a weak smile in his direction.

“Give me a few minutes, I’ll drive you home”.

What the fuck…

You gave him a slight nod, caught off guard.

Chris had never offered anything like that before, what did it mean? Maybe you were reading too far into this, but then again, you’d known each other for years and didn’t even know where each other lived. What was with the suddenly change...?

Your thoughts were interrupted by noise of Chris rapidly tapping against his keyboard, your focus being instantly drawn as his slender fingers were lit up by the moonlight shining in through the crack in the blinds. You let your eyes wander as he reached for the mouse and delicately scrolled…

You cursed yourself for letting your mind drift, plagued by your newfound information about Chris’ sex life, only to get cut off once again by Chris fiddling with the buckles on his bag.

He’s your co-worker

“I’m ready if you are” You look up and he was returning the gaze towards you cheerfully and you instantly noticed the absence of his glasses. Your heart throbbed as your colleague had suddenly become 10x more attractive and a deep pit formed in your stomach, wondering how you are meant to survive a car journey with him while he looked like that.

On the drive home, you found yourself basically gripping the car door, begging for oxygen. Chris had once again removed his suit jacket and had leant over to throw it onto the backseat. You found yourself rushing to look away before he turned back in case you couldn’t control yourself and kissed him there and then. To make matters worse, he had proceeded to roll up his shirt sleeves, accentuating his thick forearms that made you almost break a sweat. He had one hand carefully gripping the wheel and the other placed gently on the gear stick. You watched intently through your peripherals, the way Chris’ arm flexed every time he changed gear or turned the wheel using the palm of his hand – you had learnt something new about yourself that day and as much as you wanted to be mad, you were enjoying it just a little bit too much.

Once you arrived home, you fought yourself on asking him inside.

He’s you co-worker  you repeatedly reminded yourself, before thanking him and getting out of the car. You took your time however, hoping for a sign that he might want this too, only, it never came.

You went to home that night, your chest heavy with guilt and regret.

Chris knew exactly what he was doing. He felt disgusting and he knew it was wrong, but he couldn’t help himself.

Chris had known he wanted you since the day he first lied eyes on you, and it only grew by the day. Watching you around the office pained him. You were so kind-hearted and caring to everyone there, he couldn’t help but want it all to himself.

He wanted you to himself.

He often found himself pretending to not understand something just so you could stare into his eyes while you slowly explained it to him, just so he could get a brief glance down your shirt and at your cleavage as you bent over his desk, just so he could see your skirt slightly lift as you leant over, and just so he could watch you walk away.

He found his slacks tighten every time you switched persona and dominated the office, assigning roles and complaining when work wasn’t up to standard. It was a shame though, he thought, that he was the only person you never seemed to be mean to.

This is my punishment  he had decided. His fantasies were disgusting, and the universe was taking it out on him for being a pervert.

He had to take his jacket off as soon as he got into the car. Chris had caught himself looking as you lifted your bare leg to fold over the other, skirt lifting and briefly showing your underwear (which Chris had accidently noted matched your bra that day). He felt his chest tighten and his cheeks grew warm. He felt suffocated, needing to calm and cool himself before you noticed something was wrong. Chris had worked so hard to keep up his sweet persona, hiding how truly disgusting he was from you, and he was not about to let it slip now.

He didn’t know what had come over him 10 minutes prior asking to give you a lift – a sudden wave of confidence. Never before had Chris had the courage to ask you out, not that this was a date, but it counted for something. Maybe it was because you had joined him earlier in the week for the coffee run and he had deluded himself into thinking you wanted him too. Maybe it was because he had noticed you strangely drifting away recently and needed to win you back. Maybe he finally was finally going to make a move…

“You’ve been avoiding me this week” Chris shocked himself when he noticed he was the one who had just spoken.

You shifted anxiously in your seat, “I’ve just gotten myself tired… too much work I guess”.

You looked over to Chris, sending him a smile, hoping that he believed you.

He didn’t.

But the way you looked at him caused him to forget to care.

15 minutes later, he pulled up outside your house after what felt like the shortest car journey of his life. The rain pattered on the windshield as you gathered your belongings and Chris racked his brain for any excuse to come in or to not let you leave the car.

He couldn’t find one.

You bid him goodbye and wished him a safe journey home before running inside to escape the rain. You threw your bags onto the floor as you entered your house, sighing, kicking off your shoes and falling back against the door. You rubbed your face, wondering how much longer you had to suffer like this and what you had to do to get over him.

Your thoughts, however, didn’t last for long as they were cut off by the panic caused by the feel of your coat pocket feeling strangely empty, where your phone once was.  You ran over to your bags, rummaging through and finding nothing.

Shit

You knew exactly where it was.

Of course it is

Chris’ car. It must have fallen out. You wanted to scream at the universe for this. No matter what, everything just circled back to him. You were not getting over him anytime soon…

You picked yourself up off the floor and rushed towards your door. He might still be outside you had convinced yourself – you prayed. You were prepared to run out into the rain bare footed, only to be stopped by a figure as you pulled open your front door. 

“You, um, left this in my car” He spoke, so quiet it was almost a whisper.

You didn’t realise how badly you needed to see him in that moment. He was like a drug, and you were having withdrawals. Nobody had ever made you feel like this, and it scared you. Your fingers brushed as you took the phone from him, not breaking eye contact once and you were convinced you saw a darkness flash over his eyes. Did he want you too? Did he feel the same? Your brief touch left you needing more, feeling empty without him and all you could think about in that moment was having his soft skin back on yours again.

Your hands had a mind of their own; you felt them reach towards Chris, dropping the phone that brought you two together onto the floor, and pulling him towards you. It didn’t take much, he was already moving you backwards, his hands on your waist and yours on his tie.

You felt him push against you hungrily while a hand snapped round the back of your head to protect it from the wall behind you. His other hand remained on your waist, caging you in and unknowingly keeping you up when you felt like your knees were about to give way.

His kiss was passionate and soft, but you could tell he wasn’t holding back. There was determination in his actions, and you let him. You swallowed your pride and any nagging thoughts in the back of your mind and just let him have you. You just wanted to enjoy the moment you had waited years for.

Only it didn’t last long.

It was over just as quickly as it started.

You felt Chris pull away, running his hand through his hair, aggravated, and muttering a shitty excuse about being sorry or how he shouldn’t have done it. You watched as he backed out of the door you two had conveniently left open and the deafening silence pulled you back to reality; you were abandoned against the wall, frozen in place.

You spent that weekend rearranging your house, putting any furniture you could against the empty wall in hopes to disguise it. Every time you looked over, you couldn’t help but relive your moment together, making you feel nauseous and yet, no matter what, you just couldn’t look way. You eventually decided on a pot plant, one you had found at a market you had dragged yourself to as a distraction. (It hadn’t worked)

The metaphor was ironic – something was growing and it wasn’t your love. You dreaded going back to work. You were used to the tension between you two over the past week but god, this was too much. Maybe you could hand in your two weeks’ notice? Do you think they’d accept two days? You wrote it up and printed it off nonetheless.

Maybe it’s for the best  you considered. This could be your way out. He tried it with you, he made it blatantly clear he didn’t want it and you certainly couldn’t face him again after that. If you quit and got a new job elsewhere, maybe you might have a chance of getting over him.

You can’t run away from your problems!  You ignored that thought. You weren’t really in the mood for thinking logically today.

You had shown up late to work Monday morning. At least you were there though, it was more than what you expected of yourself. Thankfully no one had picked up on the distance between you and Chris – metaphorically and physically. You were convinced he’d furthered himself from you…

You spat out some lie of coming down with a cold to anyone who questioned your tardiness and to your surprise everyone bought it. Well, so you thought.

“Hey, can I speak to you when you get chance?” you had called out to your boss as she rushed past your desk, mid task.

“If this is about you quitting, then the answer is no” she pinched the bridge of her nose and stopped in her tracks. You two had a great relationship and were extremely close, considering that she was your boss. Your friendship allowed you two to be completely honest and tell each other things exactly how they were; you only realised this was a curse in disguise as she saw straight through you.

“W-what?”

“You left your notice on your desk,” she sighed, and you whipped your head round to your desk, panicked. To your surprise, there sat Chris, adamantly watching the conversation unfold, a sad look glazed over his eyes.

You reminded yourself to laugh about that later.

“If you’re going to quit, can you at least wait and do it at a time when we’re not so busy?” She turned back to her assistant and proceeded to continue their prior conversation, walking off and leaving you frozen in your tracks. You tried calling after her, but you knew that was as far as you were going to get with her. Defeated, you made your way back over to your desk where Chris had decided to finally look away.

If the tension between you two wasn’t obvious to everyone in the office, it sure was now.

He wasn’t sure how he had ended up in this situation again. It was Monday evening, and everyone had left – except him and you. Every time Chris was left alone with you, he struggled to contain himself. The weight on his chest was a constant reminder of how badly he had fucked up at the weekend by letting his impulses take over and as a result, ruined one of the only good things in his life.

“You’re quitting because of me?” Jesus Christ, he needed to learn to stop talking whenever there was an awkward silence. You looked up from your paperwork and glared at him.

What a dick!

“Not everything is about you Chris”.

“You’ve been quiet all day…” he pushed.

“I’m just tired that’s all”.

“You’ve used that excuse before” he smirked at you from across the table.

“Why don’t you just mind your own fucking business?” You stood up, slamming your hands on the table in front of you and hovered over Chris. Silence echoed throughout the room, and you instantly felt a deep pit growing in your stomach.

“Shit! I’m sorry,” you rushed out, looking away. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that”. You were completely oblivious however, to Chris tucking his chair in as close as possible or finding anything he could to cover his crotch after your sudden outburst. Was it wrong for him to want to keep going, to keep pushing you? He knew you felt guilty for your actions, but he saw red and from then on, could only think with his dick...

The guilt, however, overcame you. You knew Chris didn’t deserve for you to shout at him like that and that you were taking your own emotions out on him. He was only teasing you, probably trying to lighten the mood and rid of the heavy tension lingering between you two and you went and ruined it – again!

You couldn’t take it anymore. You reached down to pick up your bag from underneath your desk and began packing away any files you may need.

I’ll finish it at home  you thought to yourself. You couldn’t stand to be around Chris anymore and needed to get out before you did anything else you regretted. That was until your thoughts were cut off by the feeling of being harshly spun around until you felt the backs of your thighs hit your desk. You were faced with the man you were trying so hard to avoid, caging you in and giving you a sense of déjà vu to the Friday evening you had spent together three days prior.

“What are you doing?” your voice small.

He had bowed his head and squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t know” he croaked out. You couldn’t see his face, but you could tell he was fighting with himself, and it pained you to go through this for a second time.

“You don’t want this” you let out in a whisper. His eyes suddenly snapped open, and his head whipped up.

“W-what? No, of course I want this”. He had shrunk his head down to your level and looked you straight in the eye.

He was genuine.

“Why did you run away last time then?”

“I was scared. I thought you didn’t want this”. He broke eye contact and backed away again.

You couldn’t help but smile, “I want this”.

“I want this too” He leant back onto the desk behind you and hesitantly left a peck on the corner of your mouth, feeling him smile against you. His body swallowed yours and you wanted to stay in his warmth forever.

That was until you felt it against your thigh.

You looked down and Chris felt your body shake against him as you giggled; his face flushed when he realised what was going on. He’d gotten distracted from his problem during your sudden confession that he forgot the reason he stopped you from leaving in the first place.

He leant behind you and swiped everything off your desk (a bold move for him), barely giving you chance to argue before pulling you towards him by the waist, spinning you around and pushing you forward, leaving you to catch and hold yourself up on the desk, now in front of you. Your button up shirt hung lose, exposing your shoulder, allowing Chris to pull it down where he began to leave a trail of kisses down your back as he lightly dragged his index finger up your thigh, underneath your mini skirt. You could image him smirking as you let out a gasp and arched your back slightly at his cold touch. “Do you do this to all your girls?” you snarked, breathlessly.

His touched stopped at your sudden comment and Chris spun you back round to face him, picking you up and placing you onto the table.

“What girls?” He asked, a look of confusion spread across his face.

“I don’t know, I just thought… you know,” you hesitated “I saw your wallet.”

“Oh”

You stared at him blankly as he worked up the courage to explain himself. “My friends put it in there as a joke on a night out,” He squinted at you, as if he was scared to see your reaction. “Something about hyping myself up to actually get laid” His voice faded out towards the end of his sentence.

You grabbed his tie, slowly bringing him closer to you. “Have you ever...?”

“Just once” He blushed.

You giggled into his mouth as you pulled him into a kiss. “Cute”

For someone with such little experience, Chris sure knew his way around your mouth. Your little pecks quickly turned into a heated make out where his hands began roaming your body, eventually finding your shirt buttons, and beginning to undo them. His lips followed, making their way down your neck and eventually to your chest. His hands found their way to your breasts, cupping them and causing you to question whether he really was as unexperienced as he said he was…

You watched as Chris’ eye line changed to your cleavage and you couldn’t help but adore how innocent he was, getting distracted so easily, which corrected your previous train of thought. You brought him back to reality by directing his lips back to your chest and you felt a pair of large hands grip your thighs, pulling you forward and causing you to fall backwards as Chris continued his way down your stomach.

The remains of his kisses sent chills throughout your body as they went cold, causing you to seek warmth in Chris, edging closer towards him and placing your legs over his shoulders as his warm breath heated your core. You choked out a gasp as his nose brushed against your clit and he laid soft kisses against the top of your underwear in an attempt to tease you.

‘Your wet…’ he spoke, almost surprised.

‘It’s all you’.

You felt Chris suck in a breath and pause beneath you, you could sense his nerves from above. You grabbed him by his curls, pulling his head up and forcing him to make eye contact with you. You begged him with your eyes before forcing his head back down, granting him permission.

You felt him leave a soft lick down your centre and waited for your protests. He was met with comfortable silence allowing him to repeat the motion, eventually picking up the pace and soon leaving longer strips that caused you to thrust your hips forward, pushing you even closer to him. You felt as he peeled your underwear off of you, letting it dangle around your ankle, and his tongue gently slipped between your folds, licking a few strips before finding your hole and began tongue fucking you. His free hand had moved down to your hip where his thumb reaching down to toy with your clit. Your hands were still in his hair, and you couldn’t help but pull at it, reassuring and guiding him as he began to go down on you. He peeled his last hand away from your waist and was brought it up to your core, feeling your slit before he slowly entered a finger. Your deep groan cause Chris to twitch in his jeans, encouraging him to push it in deeper before pulling out and entering a second. You felt his lips kiss at your nub where he started to lick and kiss. Chris vibrated against you as he let out moans, almost sending you into overdrive and you couldn’t help but grind against him; his thrusts speeding up to match you.

“Cameras” you had managed to make out in between moans as you felt yourself grow closer to finishing, shooting up and disappointingly pushing Chris away. You had suddenly been brought back to reality by your moans echoing in the empty room and you realised where you were. There was a very high chance that you two were going to get caught and as much as you loved this new side of Chris, you knew that even he wasn’t kinky enough to properly do you up against your desk in his place of work. Yes, you had tried to resign from your job only 5 hours prior but now everything seemed to be sorting itself out and you didn’t really want to lose your job this way.

Chris pulled away from you, horror spread across your face and you internally panicked, wondering if you had ruined your one and only chance of being with him like this… He trailed his hands up your hips before picking you up and helping you off of your desk. You both giggled as you wiped his mouth for him and he gave you a reassuring peck on the cheek, as if he could read your mind, before grabbing both your bags and quickly leading you out of the office by the hand.

The silence left Chris in his own thoughts, replaying the events of the last 5 minutes on repeat in his head. You were currently stood side by side with him in the elevator, the slight touch of your arms driving him crazy, and he used everything within him to hold himself back from finishing what he had just begun. He knew that if anyone saw anything, then both your careers would be ruined, but the memory of how you sounded and tasted underneath him was fogging his brain and he found himself struggling to stay focused.

He felt your hand reach into his trouser pocket, placing something inside. It didn’t take Chris long to realise it was your underwear and in return, you felt his hand begin to trail up the inside of your thigh. You bit back a gasp, knowing exactly where this was going and what Chris was trying to do. You felt his fingers play with the hem of your skirt and back to the inside of your leg. You tilted your head slightly to find Chris facing forward, straight faced, as if he wasn’t the one currently with his hands up your skirt. You took note on how he had angled your belongings to cover his actions from the camera in the corner of the elevator and remembered to reward him for it later.

The lift opened after what felt like forever and Chris led you out towards the car park, his hand on the small of your back and further positioning himself behind you as it gradually got lower. He didn’t know what had gotten into him but no matter what, he couldn’t keep his hands off of you. You were a magnet and the connection between you two was so strong, he couldn’t leave you alone. Once you eventually reached his car, he held open the passenger door for you, reminding you how easily he could switch personas and you struggled to believe this was the same man who was between your legs, ready to devour you, just moments prior. Chris threw your belongings onto the backseats in a hurry before rushing into the driver’s seat, removing his jacket, and pushing his sleeves up. He suddenly seemed anxiously frantic, and you would find him adorable if you weren’t pent up.

You gave him little to no time before you were reaching over to him, grabbing his hand, and pulling it underneath your skirt. Your eyes rolled back, your head hitting the seat behind you at the relief the slight touch gave you, “Just do something Chris!”

The way you spoke his name was like his own personal porn, and the sight of you being so needy for him and him only made him weak in the knees, willing to do anything you asked of him. You felt the way he froze in place, shocked by how direct you were; his fingers moving only slightly, hesitant to touch you. You sighed and leant over, grabbing him by the chin and smashing your lips into his to close the gap between you.

You pulled away, “You just had me over a desk and edged me in an elevator, and now you’re too shy to actually touch me?” you giggled against his lips. Obviously, you were exaggerating, but you knew Chris had put on a façade and it was beginning to crack.

‘I don’t want it to be here’.

‘I don’t think I can wait any longer’, you whispered in his ear before beginning to kiss down his neck, sucking slightly and leaving a trail of marks. You were proud of yourself, excited about your female coworkers seeing the mess you made tomorrow and finally being able to claim Chris as yours.

Too in the moment, you failed to notice a hand wrapping around your legs and pulling you into Chris’ lap. Your lack of underwear caused you to gasp as you moved against the bulge in your colleagues’ slacks, also receiving a deep groan from Chris that could’ve made you come undone then and there.

The sound was music to your ears, causing you to repeat the motion and begin grinding on his clothed cock. Chris threw his head back as he let out a string of moans and you proceeding marking him, down his Adams apple to his chest. His hands found your shirt, still partially unbuttoned and loose around you, and reached underneath, pulling your breasts from your bra and toying with them. Eventually, he frantically reached underneath you and pulled down his trousers. Your actions continued but the only fabric separating you now was the thin layer of his boxers. You could feel him. The outline, shape, width… You felt dizzy and didn’t know how much more of you two teasing each other you could take.

‘I need you’ You croaked out. ‘Now!’

He nodded aggressively at you, unable to formulate any words as he reached into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. You couldn’t help but share a giggle as he took out the item that got you into this mess in the first place.

You struggled to stop yourself from staring as he rolled the condom onto himself and didn’t fail to notice the slight smirk on Chris’ face. You had felt he was big, but you hadn’t expected this and your mind ran with ideas of what you wanted to do to him. You’d have to save that for next time however, because you felt yourself throb at the sight and you needed him inside you ASAP.

You rested your hands on his shoulders, pulling yourself up off Chris’ lap and positioning yourself.

‘Are you sure you’re ok with this’ Chris had asked, nerves lacing his voice, worried you would change your mind last minute. Internally you groaned; you were hovering over his cock, tits and pussy out, practically begging him to take him and he was still worried.

‘Yes yes yes,’ you managed to mumbled out, struggling to speak as you threw your head back at the friction from brushing against his tip. You appreciated him asking for consent and found his nerves adorable, but you were too inpatient to care anymore. ‘Just please… do something’

Your statement lit a flame in Chris, causing him to pull you down and push himself up, meeting you halfway and thrusting into you. The sting hurt so good, and you fell forward, leaning your forehead against his as you tried to adjust to his size.

‘Halfway there’ Chris groaned against your lips, kissing down your jaw as he waited for you to move again.

Picking yourself back up, your hands fell to Chris’ chest as you sank further down. He swallowed a moan as he watched you take all of him where you waited a few moments before moving, rocking against him. You rushed to remove the hand that Chris used to cover his mouth in attempt to muffle his moans, replacing it with your mouth. The kisses were sloppy, your tongues fighting one another but it didn’t matter to you, you just needed him closer to you in any way you could. You picked up the pace, starting to move up and down, and his naïve moans turning you on even more than any of your partners before. His pelvic bone brushed against your clit, causing you to whimper as he matched your actions, thrusting upwards and bouncing you on his cock. Chris reached out to hold your breasts still hanging loosely out of your clothing, not knowing what to do with himself and still aware of his lack of knowledge surrounding the act.

His lips left yours and instead, sucked onto your skin, returning the favour and leaving marks down your chest. You found your hands returning to his hair and you couldn’t help but play with the soft curls hanging down the back of his neck, tugging on them in surprise when Chris’ teeth grazed your nipple. He let his tongue swirl around your areola a few times to tease you before sucking on your nipple and squeezing your other with his free hand. He made sure to swap over, taking even turns on both your tits and you fell back, hands resting behind you on his knees as you grinded forward.

‘I don’t think I can…last…much longer’ Chris coughed out. You watched as mixed emotions flashed across his face, but you had known him long enough to be able to read him like a book. Due to his lack of experience, Chris was annoyed he couldn’t last longer for you, keep you in this moment for longer, see you like this for longer. You felt a grin spread across your face, once again adoring how cute you found him.

‘That’s ok,’ you reassured. ‘Doing so well for me anyway’.

Your hair tickled your back as you tipped your head back in pleasure as he thrusted harder at your praise, and you both began to pick up the pace. Beads of sweat rolled down Chris’ scrunched up face and you had never found him sexier before; the urge to corrupt him only growing stronger.

The sound of your skin slapping together rang in your ears as it echoed throughout the now fogged up car. You were thankful for the empty car park as you were sure the car rocking would give you two away to any passerby. You reached out to hold onto anything around you as you felt yourself growing closer, your hand smearing the condensation against the glass window.

‘I think I’m going to…’ Chris whined out, his head dropping to your shoulder and his large hands returned to your waist.

‘Me too baby’ giving him permission, you cut him off and grabbed onto the headrest behind him as you felt him harshly thrust into you a few more times before tensing up and letting out a loud, deep moan as he climaxed, one causing you to do the same. You continued to ride him through your orgasms before collapsing into his arms, too tired to move.

You pulled him into your apartment, his lips attempting to find yours in the dark as you stumbled around trying to remove each other’s clothes.

‘What the fuck is that?’ Chris had pulled away and you couldn’t help but giggle when you saw his silhouette fighting your new plant. ‘It’s in my spot!’

‘I had to cover it up after our previous rendezvous’ you muttered, guiding him back to your lips in hopes of changing the subject.

You felt Chris frown against you. ‘I’ll be moving that in the morning,’ he spoke in between kisses. ‘I liked having you against that wall’.

‘Oh… Staying the night, are you?

‘I am’ he gave you one last peck on the lips before picking you up bridal style and carrying you towards your room for round 2…

a/n if y’all read this far… i hope you enjoyed :)) Ellie-mai… this is for you pookie bear <3

🤍 please consider reposting or commenting if you like my work!!!

#smut #kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #skz #stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids smut #stray kids x reader #bang chan #bang chan x reader #bangchan smut #bang chan imagines

[clockwayswrites]

Seeking Sleep

A little one shot Jason character study type thing. Implied sexual content. References to past (temporary) character death. Danny Fenton/Jason Todd WC: 767 -

These days, he had trouble sleeping.

It was the price, he supposed, for coming back from the dead. Waking up buried in the ground, in a grave, in a coffin— it left scars.

Scars. They were a funny thing, scars. (Funny as a or b; forehand or backhand.) He had been riddled with them before he came back; marked by his father, by the streets, by muggers and dealers and villains. Marked by Gotham and all of her horrible beauty.

The Pits had washed all those away.

All those marks erased like he had never lived them— bore them— accomplished them; erased like they were nothing. Now they were etched only, painfully, on his mind. His mind was still a canvas full of scars. Those scars caught and pulled and unraveled… and were all the worse when he wasn’t awake to hold himself together.

He learned a lot, those first few months back in Gotham, about what woke him up from sleep and into a panicked terror.

He couldn’t sleep on his back. He couldn’t fall asleep on his back, but worse was waking up with a choked off breath when he rolled over in his sleep.

He couldn’t sleep on silky sheets; the feel was too much like the satin insides of a coffin. (He couldn’t even wear anything silky anymore.)

He couldn’t sleep in total darkness.

Even as he struggled to find ways to deal with soothing the scars of his mind (pillows at his back, linen sheets, the hall light on), he couldn’t admit the way they pulled at him. He made excuses. The pillows are more comfortable. Linen lasts longer. Light means it’s quicker if he has to rush out for an emergency. He knew he was lying to himself, but he couldn’t admit it.

He certainly couldn't admit it to anyone else.

(Anything is better than ‘I died. I died and I cam back wrong.’)

As nervous as Jason was to bare his heart like that to someone, it took a long time to get to the point of needing excuses. But then there was Danny. And Danny… Jason orbited Danny like a planet around a star. Falling into each other’s arms and beds was almost inevitable. The bed was the problem. Danny’s sheets where silky smooth microfiber.

Jason tried to get them to go to his place more often then not. When he couldn’t guide them that way, he simply didn’t stay in bed long. He had an early morning, a family thing, work to finish up, wanted to get home before the rain— each reason felt more transparent than the last.

Each reason made that furrow between Danny’s brow deepen, and Jason hated that. He hated being the cause.

There wasn’t always a good excuse. That night they had tried a new restaurant close to Danny’s place— his home and bed were right there. Danny tugged Jason down, and Jason rolled them over so that he could touch the sheets as little as possible—

Oh.

“New sheets?”

They were linen- just rough enough under Jason’s braced hands that the touch didn’t make him shudder.

Danny simply hummed and pulled Jason into a searing kiss as he wrapped a leg around him. Who was Jason to fight that pull? Not a good enough man, that was for certain, so he let Danny pull him down down down— until he was all Jason thought about.

Later, Jason still wasn’t much encouraged to get his mind working. He watched through lidded eyes as Danny tossed the dirty washcloth back into the bathroom. But the other didn’t come back to bed.

“Danny?”

He was was fiddling with something over on the small table in front of the window.

There was a click.

Then the bedroom filled with projected stars and swirling galaxies. Jason’s breath caught in his throat.

“I can…” Danny shifted nervously when Jason glanced at him a long moment later. “I can turn it off if you don’t like it. I just thought…”

Jason cleared his throat. “No, it’s perfect. Come to bed.”

Danny smiled that small, crooked smile that Jason loved so much and did as he was told. The projection of stars played over Danny’s bare skin as he crossed the room.

Jason wanted to map the spots of light with his mouth.

He settled for kissing the scattering of freckles on Danny’s shoulder blade. Jason didn’t resist the pleased sigh slipping past his lips as Danny tucked in against him.

That night, with the room drenched in starlight and his arms around his own little star, Jason slept soundly.

#just a little thought I decided to write out a bit more thoroughly #we'll call it warm up #dp x dc #dead on main #danny fenton/jason todd

[bellaxgiornata]

Don't Walk Away [Part One]

Pairing: Frank Castle x Fem!Reader

Summary: Frank is a good man–you learned that the day he brought your dog Lucky into your life. The two of you soon began a relationship afterwards, one that was rather unconventional with how often Frank was always on the road. But one night when he's back, you're hit with the realization that you're in love with him. Noticing your nerves, Frank eventually pulls the truth out of you–and then you're left confused and heartbroken when you wake up to find him gone the next morning.

Warnings: 18+; Angst with a happy ending (in part two), emotional hurt/comfort, smut (in part two), love confession

Word Count: 5.7k

a/n: This was going to be a one part thing but I wanted to give this story everything I needed to which meant it was growing into something bigger. So there will be a part two coming that has the happy ending and smut. For now, this is angst. Enjoy and feedback is always appreciated!

Humming absently to yourself, you sealed the lid on the tupperware container of the leftover pasta you’d made for dinner. A crisp breeze made its way through the open windows in your kitchen, that comforting and familiar scent of autumn soon approaching wafting inside and filling your house. You loved this time of year when the nights finally cooled off and you didn’t have beads of sweat rolling down your back from the scorching heat of the day. There was something serene and calming about having your windows open at night, the sounds of the crickets outside a peaceful background to your evenings. 

As you made your way over to the refrigerator, you heard the sound of a car rolling to a stop somewhere along the street out front, the noise louder than usual with your windows wide open. You saw Lucky raise her head from off the kitchen floor, perking up at the noise as you opened the refrigerator door and placed the container of leftover pasta inside. Lucky let out a soft whine from the floor next, your attention fully turning down towards your dog as you shut the fridge.

“It’s just a car, girl,” you told her. “Nothing to be worried about.”

Making your way towards your dishwasher, you pulled the door open and slid out the bottom rack. Turning, you began pulling the dirty pots and bowls out of the sink from this evening and setting them one by one inside of the dishwasher. The loud thud of a car door closing outside rang out through your kitchen and Lucky jumped up from the floor. You paused, half-bent over the dishwasher as your focus shifted to her. She was standing perfectly at attention facing the living room, her entire body absolutely still except for her cropped tail. It was doing that hopeful, eager wag she would get where her tail would wag exactly three times before it stopped for a couple of seconds only to wag three more times. 

And she only ever acted like this when she noticed Frank was back.

“Is your daddy here?” you asked Lucky.

Her head turned back towards you, a happy glint in her eyes. You couldn’t contain your own excitement either, a large grin slipping onto your lips as you slid the dishrack back before closing the dishwasher door. Heading to the sink, you washed your hands, your smile only growing when you heard Lucky softly whining in barely contained joy.

By the time you were drying your hands on the kitchen towel, you heard a knock coming from the front door. Lucky bolted off towards it immediately, her excited barks loudly echoing through your previously quiet house. Making your way out of your kitchen and to the living room after her, you could hear Frank’s laughter coming through the open windows. The warm, resonate sound of it had you picking up your pace as you headed to the front door. It had been awhile since Frank had last stopped by and you'd certainly missed him. 

Unlocking the door, you hurriedly pulled it open to reveal Frank Castle standing on your doorstep–or Pete Castiglione as everyone else in the world knew him as. But you had come to know him for exactly who he was shortly after the night you met him eight months ago now. 

He was the one who’d brought Lucky into the animal hospital you’d been working at late at night. She’d been in terrible shape, barely holding on from the abuse she had clearly suffered from, and she had been covered in injuries from what appeared to be dog fights. He’d been in a panic about her, begging you to do whatever you could to save her that night when he’d barged in through the front doors carrying her limp body in his arms. Frank had barely left the animal hospital’s parking lot for the entire week she’d been in your care. He had always been checking in on her, asking if there was anything he could do. 

It wasn’t long before you’d looked into who he was, curious about the man who cared so much about an abused dog that supposedly wasn’t his dog–and then you’d managed to uncover his past. You’d been a bit wary of him at first, but Frank had only ever been kind and respectful to you and your colleagues. It was clear he had a big heart judging by how much he cared for the dog he’d rescued and couldn’t seem to let go of. Though when she was finally ready to go home and recover, you’d expected he would want to take her with him, but he’d surprised you when he had told you that he couldn’t. He was apparently living on the road for now, traveling from state to state without a real home, trying to find where he belonged. He had stayed only long enough to make sure she was healed and safe before he left.

You had ended up taking her in and naming her Lucky–because she was lucky Frank had been the one to find her and rescue her that night. But you’d also referred to her as your good luck charm because two weeks later, Frank had returned to the animal hospital you worked at and was asking about her. When he learned you’d been the one to give her a home, he’d asked if he could see her again. It was Lucky who had ultimately brought you and Frank together; she was the reason the pair of you had eventually fallen into the unconventional relationship you’d had for months now while Frank continued to live his life on the road trying to find himself–though you always wondered if he was really just punishing himself. 

Pulling the screen door open, Frank stepped inside with a broad smile spread wide across his face, his warm brown eyes focused on you. The sight of him had your heart feeling ready to burst, a large smile spreading onto your own lips in return. Lucky quickly began excitedly hopping around by Frank’s legs, demanding attention as happy barks flew out of her one after another. She only quieted when he'd finally tore his eyes from you and focused his attention on her.

“Hey girl,” Frank greeted Lucky. “You missed me, did ya?”

He took two steps inside before swiftly dropping down to his knees on the floor beside her. Lucky was quick to bombard him in a series of kisses straight away, only further encouraged by his large hands scratching behind her ears. Laughing lightly at the pair of them, you closed the front door and locked it before turning and leaning against it, watching the both of them with that smile lingering on your lips. Lucky’s entire lower half wiggled back and forth in delight as Frank continued to enthusiastically scratch behind her ears, muttering sweet words of praise to her. The reunions between the two of them had always went like this whenever Frank showed back up at your place, and it always warmed your heart to watch them together.

It was a few minutes before Lucky finally calmed, lowering to sit on her haunches in front of Frank with her tongue happily hanging out of her mouth looking as if she was smiling herself. Frank glanced up at you, one hand still absently petting Lucky as he directed that broad smile still on his face at you. The sight of it had your heart almost skipping a beat–it had been two weeks since you'd last had the opportunity to see that smile in person.

His attention not leaving you, he slipped his duffle bag from off his shoulder and dropped it to the floor by his feet. “How’s my favorite girl?” he asked.

“Feeling a little left out of this reunion,” you teased.

“Well I can’t have that now can I?” he mused.

He gave Lucky two more pats on her head before he rose back up to his feet, eyeing you with a mischievous glint in his eyes as he slowly sauntered towards you. You quirked a brow at him, the corner of your lips curving even higher upwards. The moment he was within reach, his hands were on your hips. You could feel the warmth of them seeping past the thin fabric of your sweatpants, his fingers firmly gripping you in an almost possessive way. He stepped in closer to you, closing the distance between you both as his face hovered just before yours. Your own hands rose up, landing on his chest just over his dark jacket. Your eyes locked onto his brown ones, spotting that familiar light in them they always had when he was with you. Though every time he said goodbye to you before heading out to his truck, ready to get back on the road again, you swore you saw that light extinguish behind his eyes.

“What about you, beautiful?” Frank asked, his voice a gentle rumble in your ears as he cocked his head to the side. “Did you miss me?”

“I always miss you when you’re gone, Frank,” you assured him, hands snaking their way up his solid chest until you could wrap your arms around his neck, tugging him in closer to you. “And I’m always happy to see you.”

“Is that right?” he murmured.

Frank lowered his forehead to rest against yours, his eyes closing. Yours closed seconds later, your tongue slipping out to wet your lips in anticipation of your greeting from him. He was so close to you that his lips brushed yours when he spoke next. 

“How much did ya miss me?” he asked.

Without hesitation, your arms pulled him in the rest of the way to you as you tilted your face up, capturing his lips with your own. It surprised you that his lips were always so soft every single time you kissed him because everything about Frank usually screamed the opposite of soft. And right now those lips of his were moving so deliberate and slow against yours over and over again, the feel of them finally back on yours making you suddenly breathless. You quickly found yourself getting lost in him, your body melting into his as he pressed you further back into the front door. The scent of leather and gasoline and smoke filled your nose as your mind went blank to everything else but him. Frank took another step into you, his hands sensually sliding their way down your hips and around towards your ass as he kissed you exactly like a man who'd been gone for two weeks would. 

Kissing Frank for you was vastly different than kissing anyone else you ever had before. With Frank, every kiss and every touch from him always felt full of passion and something more . Something more than just lust and desire and the urge to scratch an itch. You’d never experienced that with anyone else but him, and you’d always been left wondering what that had meant.

When you felt Frank’s tongue drag its way along your lower lip so painfully slow and purposeful, you couldn't resist the faint moan that fell out of your mouth. Frank swallowed down the sound before he squeezed your ass in his large hands. Then he pulled away from you just a bit, chuckling at the whine you emitted in protest. 

"Much as I'd love to continue this, beautiful," Frank murmured, pausing to place a sweet kiss back to your lips, "It's been hours since I ate. Been drivin' all day trying to get back to you before you went to bed. D’ya mind if we catch up while I eat?"

Your right hand withdrew from its place around his neck, gradually making its way towards his face where you began to affectionately stroke his stubbled cheek. Frank’s eyes crinkled at the corners as you did. It was a moment before you answered, just enjoying the slight rasp of his beard against your fingertips, content that he was here again. Though you loved the slightly outgrown beard he always showed up with, clearly not having had a chance to shave in a few days each time you saw him again. 

"Only if you don't eat that packaged shit in your bag," you replied, gesturing your head at his duffle bag with a grimace. "I just finished dinner a bit ago, I can reheat you some of the pasta I made."

Frank's smile widened further, his hands gripping your ass firmly again. "You're too good to me, sweetheart," he told you. 

"Well somebody needs to make sure you're eating more than tuna fish from a bag and beef jerky," you shot back, nails playfully scratching along his jawline. "I need to make sure you're not malnourished out there on the road."

"Oh do you now?" he asked, his hands releasing you.

"Mhmm,” you hummed out as Frank stepped back from you, a grin forming on his lips. “You make sure you take those dirty things off before you make yourself comfortable, though," you told him, gesturing a finger down at his black boots.

Frank's grin curled up even higher before he dipped his head once in a single nod. "Yes, ma'am."

You hummed out a pleased noise before turning and making your way back to the kitchen. It came as no surprise to you that Lucky didn't follow after you, choosing to stay behind with Frank as he gathered his bag and took his boots off. 

Opening the refrigerator door, you pulled out the container of pasta you'd only minutes ago put away before setting it on the kitchen counter. Next you reached up into a cabinet, pulling down a bowl and then grabbing a fork from a nearby drawer. Afterwards, you began scooping a generous portion of food into the bowl–you knew damn well Frank ate like shit when he wasn't with you. You also knew he loved your cooking. 

As you opened the microwave door, you heard Frank's tired feet shuffling their way towards the kitchen. By the time the pasta had begun reheating in the microwave, Frank was at your back, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling the back of you into the front of him. He buried his face into your neck and you tilted your head, giving him easier access as your eyes fell closed. He nuzzled quietly against your skin for a moment, the scratch of his beard almost a tickle.

“Missed you,” he murmured into your neck.

Your hands landed on top of his arms where they were wrapped around your waist, a contented sigh slipping out of your lips. You missed him every single day he was gone, constantly checking your phone for a new text or a call or a voicemail from him. Always desperate for anything at all from him. For the past few months you’d found yourself wishing he’d just stay one of these days instead of always slinging his duffle bag over his shoulder in a few days’ time, carrying your heart off with him as he drove away in his truck.

“You know you don’t always have to leave,” you told him quietly.

Frank inhaled an audible, deep breath, holding it for a long moment before he expelled it roughly. He soon drew his face from your neck as his arms began to unwind themselves from around your waist. Your stomach nervously twisted in knots at the physical distance he was clearly creating.

You’d had this conversation with him two times before. The first time it was mostly one-sided with you doing most of the talking. The second time had resulted in a fight. Frank had gotten incredibly upset with you and you hadn’t exactly understood why before he’d grabbed his bag and disappeared. You thought that was the end of things until he’d called you a few hours later apologizing profusely. Though you didn’t see him for almost three weeks after that. 

Before he could respond with anything, the microwave beeped loudly. The sound cut through the tension that had formed in the kitchen. Clearing your throat, you focused on grabbing the hot bowl from the microwave.

“Why don’t you get comfortable and I’ll grab you a beer?” you suggested, shooting him a strained smile over your shoulder.

For a moment Frank stood there silently just a foot behind you, an unreadable expression on his face. You could see the muscles jumping in his cheeks as he ground his teeth together–in anger or something else, you had no idea. It was a bit before he finally nodded, turning and shuffling his way towards your kitchen table. You watched him slide out a chair before sinking down into the seat. Lucky was at his side instantly, resting her head on his thigh.

With the steaming bowl of pasta in one hand, you made your way to the refrigerator and opened it. As you pulled out a beer for him, you could feel the weight of his stare on you.

“So what stories did you bring me back this time?” you asked him, trying to diffuse the tension as you shut the fridge door. 

Almost instantly his face lit up with a smile, another one of his deep, rumbling laughs filling your kitchen. Your nerves quickly melted away at the sound as you headed over towards him, depositing the bowl of pasta and beer in front of him on the table.

“Oh I got plenty of stories, sweetheart,” Frank told you, straightening in his chair as he grabbed the fork, hungrily spearing a few noodles.

Pulling the chair out beside his, you settled down into it before resting an elbow on the table. With a bright smile back on your face, you rested your chin in the palm of your hand, listening intently as he began to animatedly fill you in on his past two weeks.

°•°•°•°•°•°

Slowly waking, your eyelids fluttered open only to be met with the darkness of your bedroom. It took your brain a moment to register the warmth that was at your back, though you smiled in the darkness when you remembered Frank was curled up behind you with his large hand resting on your hip under the sheets. 

The tension had quickly vanished between the pair of you while Frank had eaten and the two of you had caught up. Shortly afterwards, Frank had grabbed a shower while you’d been hurriedly closing up all of the windows in your house. Then you’d made your way to the bathroom and slipped out of your clothes, joining him under the warm spray where the two of you caught up with each other in another way. 

Now he was fast asleep behind you wearing nothing but a pair of his boxers. His breathing filled your bedroom with each soft and rhythmic exhale from his mouth. You always missed having him in your bed whenever he was off on the road. It always felt too big and empty without him here sharing it with you.

That thought hit you hard right in the chest and you winced. It had been nearing a year of this long distance relationship with Frank now, and even though you’d been aware of his situation of being on the road when you’d started it with him, you’d recently come to feel differently about it. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust that he wasn’t with anyone else–though at first you’d wondered about that–but there was something there that you hadn’t been able to put your finger on before. Some other reason that his constant coming and going had started to feel different to you. That you’d stopped being so open to it.

You slipped a hand up out of the sheets, rubbing the heel of it against your eyes. That nagging feeling was back again. It was the same one that had you feeling restless and like there was something missing whenever you thought about Frank lately. With a sigh you shifted in the sheets, carefully trying to maneuver your way out of the bed and away from him without waking him up. Though you knew he was usually completely exhausted whenever he turned up on your doorstep and would sleep through just about anything.

Quietly you made your way down the side of your bed, sneaking past Lucky who was contentedly passed out in her dog bed, curled up in a tight ball. You continued to tiptoe towards the door, exiting your bedroom before continuing to make your way down the short hallway and into your kitchen. You could feel that nagging, unnamable feeling eating away at you again as you stopped beside the kitchen counter, reaching a hand up and opening a cabinet before pulling down a glass. 

Silently you made your way over to the sink, filling the cup halfway with water before you turned, resting your back against the counter. You drew the glass to your lips, sipping on the cool liquid as your eyes focused on the dark hallway nearby. Despite the stillness of your house, if you listened closely, you could hear Frank’s even breaths drifting out of the bedroom. The sound of it brought a faint smile to your lips.

And that’s when it hit you. 

Your hand tightened around the cold glass as the realization came crashing into you all at once, nearly drowning you in the revelation. You wondered how you’d been so blind to what had been right in front of you for so long.

You had fallen in love with Frank.

It had happened somewhere between all those phone calls and text messages you’d shared with him these past eight months, along with those impromptu camping trips he had brought you and Lucky with him on. Somewhere between the nights he’d cooked you dinner and taken you to bed, showing you just how much he’d missed you while he was gone. All those times he’d shown up on your doorstep–sometimes with a bouquet of flowers or with breakfast and coffees in hand–you’d fallen for him. 

There was no denying it.

Though you immediately became terrified of the realization. You knew about Frank’s past. You knew he’d been married and he’d had two children. You knew that all three of them had been brutally murdered right in front of him. And you damn well knew he still thought about them everyday–he still had nightmares some nights when he was with you. Horrible ones that made you feel useless to help him in any other way besides offering him comfort as he wept into your shoulder in the middle of the night. 

How the hell could you tell him you loved him? Did you even tell him that? 

A nervous churning began in your stomach as your eyes dropped down to the almost empty glass in your trembling hand. You were in love with a man who wasn’t a physical constant in your life. Sure, Frank kept in touch with you on and off throughout the day every single day that he was gone, but he wasn’t here with you every day. And that’s what it was you’d found yourself wanting lately. But with what he’d lost and how he seemed to keep spending his days searching for something out there on the road, could he ever even be here with you?

Chewing the inside of your cheek, you turned and dumped out the last bit of water in the sink before setting the glass on the counter. With a quivering exhale, you wrapped your arms around yourself before quietly tiptoeing back to the bedroom. Though the moment you entered, Frank began to stir in the sheets. You stopped instantly at the foot of the bed when you saw his head rise from off the pillow, his brows furrowing together.

“Somethin’ wrong?” Frank’s groggy voice asked.

Nervously you tucked some hair behind your ear, continuing back towards your side of the bed. You shook your head as you pulled the sheets further back, aware of Frank’s eyes following you through the darkness.

“No,” you answered quietly. “Just needed a glass of water.”

You slipped back onto the mattress, laying on your back this time as you turned your head along the pillow. You sent Frank a tight smile as you pulled the sheets back over yourself. A moment later you felt his hand sliding its way carefully up your neck, coming to cradle the side of your face. He carefully drew it further towards his, his thumb absently stroking your cheekbone with such tenderness that your heart stuttered in your chest. You swallowed hard, that tight band of nerves that had formed at your recent revelation in the kitchen a minute ago twisting noticeably in your gut. 

“You sure?” Frank asked.

Your brows twitched together briefly at his question. “Yeah, why?” you asked him cautiously.

“You seem…on edge,” Frank pointed out, his thumb still stroking your cheek. “Did I do somethin’?”

Instantly you shook your head, though your immediate denial only seemed to further pique his interest. He shifted on the mattress, drawing himself up onto an arm as he gazed down at you, brushing some hair from your face.

“What’s goin’ on.”

It wasn’t a question. You heard it in the tone of his voice, he knew something was wrong. Internally you cursed that Frank was such a perceptive man. 

Swallowing hard, you shook your head again as your gaze dropped down to his bare chest. The marks from your nails were still visible along his skin in the dimly lit room and your cheeks heated at the memory of your time with him in the shower earlier. But that heat quickly gave way to your nerves under Frank’s heavy stare.

You knew Frank had only ever been with you after the passing of his wife. He had never let anyone else in–he had never even slept with anyone else besides you after Maria had passed. And he’d opened up to you about a lot of the pain he carried over these past few months, too. But what you didn’t know was how he would react to this thing between you both suddenly being something more than what it had been for the past eight months. 

“Tell me,” Frank ordered.

“I just–”

You stopped, biting your bottom lip as those knots in your stomach from earlier twisted tighter and tighter. Fingers curling around the bedsheets, your eyes snapped shut. You weren’t sure if you could get the words out.

“You just what?” his gruff voice gently pressed.

Inhaling a trembling breath, you tried to find the courage to answer him. You knew he wouldn't drop this now. Maybe he’d surprise you–you hoped so–but if you were being entirely honest with yourself, you didn’t expect him to reciprocate your feelings. And you weren’t entirely sure how you felt about that, either. Could Frank ever even love you? Maybe not now, but possibly someday? Would he ever even let himself feel that way for someone that wasn't Maria? You admittedly weren't sure about the answers to those questions, and you weren't certain Frank himself even had the answers. And that scared you now more than it ever had in the past.

“Talk to me,” Frank urged when you remained silent.

“I don’t–don’t exactly know how to say this,” you whispered, the words falling out of you in a rush. “I guess I never really let myself think about it before so I–I didn’t realize it until…just now. I mean, you’re always coming and going so I’ve never really–really let myself think about the possibility that I–” your voice broke off mid-sentence. Even you could hear the tremble in your words. Closing your eyes tighter, you tried to push the words out, unable to look him in the face as you bore your heart to him next. “I love you, Frank. And I–I don’t expect to hear you say that in return to me. But I–” you sucked in a sharp breath, wincing as you repeated the confession aloud to him, “–I love you.”

Silence met your ears. You felt the way Frank’s thumb paused its repetitive movements along your cheek as he stiffened beside you in the bed. You kept your eyes clamped closed, too afraid to see his reaction. But the longer the silence dragged on in the bedroom, the worse that feeling in your stomach grew. Maybe you should have lied and not said anything at all. Even if you didn’t expect to hear him say it in return, you still expected something .

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t–”

You were cut off by Frank’s hand on your cheek pulling you towards him before his mouth was suddenly on yours. You rolled over onto your side, your right hand snaking its way around his waist and up his back, fingers digging into his hard muscles. His hand held you to him, firm but gentle, as he kissed you with an intensity you’d never felt from him before. You’d barely had a chance to register much else before he sharply broke away from you. 

Your eyes flew open at the abrupt end to that passionate kiss, confusion written all over your face. Though seconds later Frank was pressing his forehead to yours, his own eyes closed. He remained silent, not saying anything in return as his thumb began its affectionate path along your cheekbone again. For now, you took that as a positive response, one that briefly quelled the rising nerves in your stomach as you brushed your nose up against his. 

Frank pulled away from you after a moment, his lips placing two long, lingering kisses along your forehead before he settled back on his pillow. His hand released your cheek to instead wrap around your waist, drawing you further into him. Easily obliging, you snuggled up against the front of him, relaxing into the heat and comfort of his body as your eyelids briefly lowered.

He may not have said it back, but you figured that kiss meant something good, at least. You figured you had tomorrow to talk to him about it all. You’d make sense of things then. For now, you just wanted to curl up against Frank and drift to sleep in the safety of his arms.

°•°•°•°•°•°

Lucky’s high-pitched whine met your ears first. You rolled over, burying your face into your pillow and trying to block out the sunlight seeping past your curtains and hitting the back of your eyelids. You groaned, throwing a hand out to your right and hoping to pull Frank closer to you–but your hand hit the cold mattress. Instantly your head rose from your pillow, your eyes blinking rapidly as they tried to adjust to the bright light in your room. 

The space beside you was empty.

Frowning, you pushed yourself upright on the bed, your eyes surveying the bedroom. Lucky was sitting beside the bedroom door, her dark gray ears drooping as she ducked her head. She whined again as she looked back at you.

“Frank?” you called out.

When you didn’t get a response, you kicked the sheets off of yourself and hurriedly threw your legs over the side of your bed. Brows furrowing together in confusion, you stood up and made your way out of the bedroom and down the short hallway with Lucky following after you. Though you immediately came to a stop in the living room. Frank’s boots were missing from where he’d set them last night by the front door.

Your mouth went dry as your eyes flew to the couch next. His duffle bag wasn’t where he’d tossed it on the cushions before his shower last night, either. Your heart began to pound in your chest, the beating of it uneven and erratic.

“Frank?” you called out again.

No answer.

Lucky walked past you, making her way to your front window. She nuzzled the curtains out of her way as she looked outside. Feeling like you were moving in slow motion, you made your way to the window after her. Reaching a hand out, you pulled the dark blue curtains back. 

Frank’s truck wasn’t parked out front where it had been last night.

A sharp gasp fell out of you, your hand dropping the curtain and flying up to cover your mouth as you stumbled a couple of steps backwards. You could feel the burn of tears building in your eyes, a tightness forming in your chest.

Frank was gone. He must’ve slipped out of bed sometime last night or early this morning and just left without a word. A strangled noise slid out from behind your hand at that thought and you pressed your lips firmly together, trying to keep from crying. 

A desperate, hopeful thought ran through your mind next. Maybe he’d run out to grab breakfast and didn’t say anything because he thought he’d be back before you’d woken?

Hurrying back down the hallway towards your bedroom, you headed straight to your nightstand and practically ripped your phone from the charger. You unlocked it, noticing there weren’t any notifications from Frank. Opening up your contacts, you quickly found his name and dialed his number. You held the phone to your ear with bated breath.

Though it didn’t ring. Not even once. Instead, your call had gone straight to Frank’s automated voicemail.

Slowly you lowered the phone from your ear and down to your lap as you blankly sank down on the edge of your bed. Your finger ended the call as your vision began to blur from the tears quickly welling in your eyes. It wasn’t long before they began to spill forth, hot and wet as they raced down your cheeks. Lucky’s head gently lowered to your left knee as she softly whined again. Almost instantly you crumpled in half, throwing your arms around her neck as you sobbed into her fur.

Frank had left you. All because you’d gone and fallen in love with him.

#frank castle x reader #frank castle x you #frank castle angst #frank castle #frank castle fanfic

[bagopucks]

C. Caufield - Linear Progress

✄————————————

Cole Caufield x Fem!reader

Requested✨

Word Count: 3.3k

Warning(s): anxiety, mention of depressive episode, sad!cole

These upcoming fics are all things from my notes app from last season, doctored and given a finish so I could post! Some of these are so long it’d be a shame to just delete.

—————————————

His smile barely reached his eyes. His laughter was distant and distracted. Cole, so used to keeping good posture to feel like he measured up to those around him, stood about as poorly as a pregnant mother. His gloved hands clasped in front of himself as he shifted his weight from skate to skate.

I couldn’t take pictures of him like that. People would never notice the vulnerable state he was in, but I did. He looked so nervous. He looked like he wanted to be anywhere but on the ice. And I knew that’s exactly what was going through his mind, because he’d pulled all the stops that morning trying to get me to call off for him. He’d tried saying he didn’t feel good, then he tried saying he just wanted to lay in bed. Then he tried faking a headache, and he tried tricking me into thinking he had gone back to bed. By the time I got him into the car, Cole’s attitude had done a complete switch. All of a sudden it was like work was the best place on earth. We had parted ways to do our separate things, but when I came down to the ice with my camera, I could sense Cole’s discomfort from a mile away.

“You wanna hit something other than the glass, Coley?” I watched Cole through the lens of my camera. Watched the way he brushed off the chirp with a quiet chuckle and a nod. He just wanted to stay home. I should have let him. Practice was only an hour, but it certainly felt longer. Between everybody’s endless digs on the blonde, and the occasional glances in Cole’s direction from coaches, I could see his facade cracking and fading.

I didn’t capture near as many photos as I would have liked, but my boss would just have to use what the other photographers got. Surely we’d have more than enough. I tucked my camera back into its bag by the time practice ended, watching the boys leave the ice, and eventually walking toward the visitors tunnel. I stopped short though, when I heard a puck slam off the glass. I turned back to the ice, my heart sinking in my chest at the frustration on Cole’s face.

“Fucking empty net.” His voice carried through the empty arena.

This had nothing to do with the empty net in the present. It had to do with the empty net he missed one week prior. That seemed to have started his scoring drought.

“Fuck.” He spat out. My brow furrowed as he skated toward the bench, my body tensing in anticipation as he raised his stick, clearly ready to slam it off the top of the bench wall until it broke. Before he could even bring the stick down, his entire body relaxed. He found reason within his anger. Or maybe he had simply given up. I watched Cole throw the stick aside in the bench instead, saying, ‘fuck it,’ before he stomped down the tunnel toward the locker room.

He had just returned from an injury. Adjusting was normal. Relearning some things was normal. But Cole wasn’t patient with himself. He never was. I carried my camera down the separate hall, half tempted to retrieve Cole’s stick, but ultimately deciding against it. He’d be embarrassed if he knew I’d watched him lash out like that. He hated when people saw any side of him that wasn’t the usual giggly and fun side.

I stole away to my office to finish a few things before I received a message from him, trying to speed up the process of downloading photos to my computer as Cole’s face popped up on my phone screen. I quickly answered the call.

“Hey, babe-“

“I wanna go home.” So much for pleasantries, but I hadn’t expected them in the first place.

“Give me maybe.. fifteen minutes, okay?” Silence followed my request for time.

“Please.” I heard his voice echo, my brow furrowing as I glanced toward my phone.

“Are you in the bathroom?”

“I just wanna go home.” I could have sworn I heard Cole’s voice quiver.

“You can come sit in my office while you wait.”

“I’m okay.” I wanted to pinch my nose. To grab him by the shoulders and shake the stubbornness out of him.

“Why don’t you go wait in the car then?” I bit my lip as I looked back at my computer.

“‘Kay. But.. just fifteen minutes, right?”

My eyes lit up when the photos finally loaded onto the computer.

“Less than fifteen.” I answered, “I’ll be fast.”

I tried to stay true to my word, but when my boss stopped me in the hall, I knew it would be far longer than fifteen minutes. A half an hour longer to be exact. When I got out of her office, I ran as quickly as I could through the building to get to the parking lot. I felt horrible when I noticed Cole’s head lift. Our car the only one left in the players lot.

I tossed my camera in the back and climbed into the passenger seat without so much as a word. I wasn’t in trouble, but I knew Cole wasn’t thrilled.

“You said fifteen minutes.” Cole hadn’t wasted much time getting the car started and pulling out of the lot.

“I’m sorry. My boss stopped me, and- god you know how she is.”

“Talks for hours, yeah.” Cole tried to muster a chuckle. He looked so apathetic. So careless. But not in a freeing or jovial way. He simply looked drained and tired.

“What do you wanna do when we get home?” I asked, glancing out the window at the passing scenery. Christmas was just around the corner. Snow covered sidewalks and streets, and Christmas decor was up everywhere.

“I just wanna lay down.” Cole shook his head. I turned my attention to him.

“You could use a hair cut.”

“Not today.”

“Might feel good.” Laying around and doing nothing in the midst of a funk never helped anybody. As easy as it was to laze around, it usually only made one’s mental health worse.

“You can lay with me.” He was stuck on this idea. Too bad I was stuck on my own as well.

“I’ll lay with you if you let me cut your hair.”

Cole didn’t reply. He bit his lip and ignored the proposal. “I have stuff to do today anyway.” I shrugged. I wanted to be there, but if Cole didn’t let me in, there wasn’t much I could do. So if he insisted on laying around all day, I’d busy myself with cleaning, straightening up the few decorations we had yet to put out, working on Christmas cards. Anything to busy myself while he stayed miserable.

“‘Mkay.”

It was the end of our conversation until we got back to our apartment. I carried my things inside behind Cole, who kicked his shoes off and headed straight for our bedroom. I had to stop myself from following after him. Instead, I dropped my camera bag on the love seat and wandered into the dining room to grab my laptop,

He’d come around eventually. It was what I kept telling myself as I turned on some Christmas music and put the few finishing touches on our customized Christmas cards. I sang along quietly, and set my laptop aside when I finished the cards. I saved the design to show to Cole when he felt better, and shot up from the couch to make a glass of hot chocolate.

I ended up making two, and against my better judgement, I carried one down the hall for my lover.

“Cole?” I toed our bedroom door open, spotting his still body curled up under a mess of blankets. His back was turned to the door, but I could tell he had the comforter pulled over half of his face. I sighed, resting the mug on his nightstand before I placed a hand on his arm.

“Made you some hot chocolate.” I whispered, leaning over to kiss his shoulder. I didn’t know if Cole was awake or not, but the affection was needed nonetheless. I tiptoed out of our room and pulled the door shut behind myself, only to return to my own world of lonely Christmas preparation.

I spent close to two hours putting up the last of the decorations and cleaning. I saved the tiny statues of Hermey and Rudolph for the tv mantle, where they always went, but Cole loved being the one to put them up. I stared down at the statues on the coffee table, placing my hands on my hips as I’ll Be Home For Christmas came on from my laptop on the couch. The cozy atmosphere was almost perfect. I just wished Cole didn’t feel so horrible. He deserved to enjoy his holidays. Not worry them away.

I glanced back toward the hall, hearing an ear splitting shatter as if on cue.

“Cole?” I shouted, panic seizing my chest as I took off through the hallway, making a sharp turn to push our bedroom door open. Cole was out of bed, wearing nothing but boxers, holding an arm out toward the door.

“It’s fine! I’m fine! I got it!” I looked toward the floor to see the mug I’d set on his dresser in pieces. I grimaced. His favorite mug. Hot chocolate ran across the floor, and I was quick to jog into the bathroom to grab a towel.

“Here.” When I returned, I tossed the towel on the floor, covering the small puddle of liquid. “I’ll go grab something to wipe the floor down.. you start picking up glass.” I left the bedroom, going to rummage through the kitchen for my floor cleaner. When I found it, I grabbed a few paper towels as well, returning in record time.

Cole was knelt on the floor, the towel from the bathroom pushed aside as he collected glass from the floor. I noticed the sporadic and heavy rise and fall of his back, the way his chest heaved. His hair covered his eyes, and despite not being able to see his face, I knew he was upset.

“Coley.” I made my way over and knelt next to him.

“I’m almost done.” Cole’s voice quivered. I set the items in my hands down, gently resting my hand on his cheek, turning his head to face me. Cole’s eyes were wet with tears, his cheeks flushed and stained by the tracks of tears that had already fallen.

“Oh, Cole.” I kissed his forehead, shaken by the sob that escaped his lips as he set the collected glass down atop a paper towel. I sat down on the floor and pulled him in. He’d been kneeling before, but he barely thought twice about it when his body fell into my own, back pressed into my chest while I held onto him tightly.

“I’m sorry.” The words came out through broken cries, but I merely shook my head and rubbed his side with one of my hands.

“It’s okay.. everything is gonna be okay.” Cole didn’t have days like these often. Where everything bubbled over and became too much to bear. He was good at keeping himself in check. In fact, he was usually the one taking care of me on days like these. But I never missed an opportunity to assure him I was there in moments when he felt he couldn’t function. When the dark cloud looming over was simply too much to bear. I rested my chin on Cole’s shoulder, pressing occasional kisses to his body to help distract and ease his mind.

“Cole,” I whispered as he started to calm down. He wiped the tears from his cheeks and slowly turned to look at me. “Let’s fix this mess, okay? Then we can relax.” He seemed reluctant to get up, and I knew he’d sit there all day if I didn’t take initiative. “C’mon.” I directed his attention back to the glass, helping him retrieve the last few pieces before he got up to throw them away. I made quick work of cleaning the floor, wiping down any sticky spots before I had stood up to put the towel in the hamper, and throw the paper towels away. When Cole returned, he stood in the doorway, hugging himself for warmth, or maybe still out of discomfort. I turned to look at him, flashing a sad smile.

“I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to..” as if I didn’t know that. As if he hadn’t already apologized. I crossed the floor to meet him in the doorway, wrapping my arms around his body. I gently rubbed his back, taking note of the tight muscles.

“It was an accident. It’s okay.” I whispered, “you wanna talk about what’s been going on?” I looked up at him, earning a quiet ‘no,’ in response.

“Cole, you were just crying. It might help some.” I tucked a lock of his long blonde hair behind his ear, then trailed my hand down his face, following his jaw.

“I just wanna lay back down.”

There it was. That constant avoidance.

“At least lay with me on the couch. All the decorations in the living room are set out.” I rubbed the small of his back, earning a careful nod. “I’m gonna grab a sweatshirt first. It’s a little cold.” I moved my arms around to his stomach, nodding and pressing a kiss to his shoulder before I slipped out of the bedroom.

There was no promise that Cole wouldn’t lay back down in our bed, but I had to trust him a little.

When I got back into the living room, I shut the lights out and plugged the Christmas tree in. I grabbed one of our Christmas blankets and laid it out on the couch, waiting for him as I placed a throw pillow at one end. I laid down and pushed the blanket aside so I could pull it over us later. I grabbed the tv remote and started sifting through channels, smiling at Cole when he finally came through the hall. He still didn’t have pants on, but his sweatshirt sleeves were pulled over his hands, and he had the plastic end of one of the strings in his mouth. As cozy as he could get. I parted my legs for him to lay down between them, and he did with little to no hesitation. Cole’s back rested against my chest, his head finding a home near my shoulder. I wrapped my legs around his own and swiftly covered up with the blanket.

“You finished decorating without me?” I heard him sniff quietly, still recovering from the crying fit he had minutes ago.

“It had to get done.” I rested a hand on his head, gently combing my fingers through his hair. “I left Rudolph for you.” I gestured toward the coffee table with my free hand.

“Are we still visiting my family over Christmas?”

“Absolutely, Cole.” I smiled. “You’ve been looking forward to that since November.” When the silence settled between us, I moved my free hand to rest atop one of his own. I dragged my thumb across his knuckles, traced the lines in his hand, flipped it over to massage his palm.

“I just want it to be over.. ya know?” Cole’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“What do you want to be over?” I matched his volume, continuing to rub his hand and play with his hair. One little change might throw him off.

“I just wanna be good again.” He sighed, turning his head against my shoulder to look up at the ceiling.

“At hockey?”

“Yeah. I can’t even hit the net.” Cole closed his eyes, trying to hide his frustrations.

“Give it time, Cole. It’s all a part of recovery. It’s not a linear thing.” I whispered. “And we’re gonna go visit your family in a week. You should be focused on that. I know you wanna be back on the ice, but if you rush you could hurt yourself.”

“What if they don’t resign me?” My movement halted. I lifted my head from the pillow to peek down at him.

“Why would they do that?”

“Because I can’t play.”

“Cole.” I squeezed his hand. “You’re gonna recover. You’ll get back to playing hockey. Your skill hasn’t just gone away.” I could understand his concerns to a degree, but I knew these worries were all in his head. “If they decide to ship you off it’s because they’re morons. It’ll have nothing to do with your recovery. Injuries happen, and you can’t control them.” His silence was deafening. Sometimes I hated how hard Cole thought about things.

“I really like it in Montreal.”

“Cole.” A tension accompanied my tone. One that made his eyes fall toward the opposite end of the couch. “You can’t trap yourself in this endless cycle of negative thoughts.” I began to play with his hair once again. “What if they do want you? What if you recover so well that they decide to sign you for more years? What if you get a better contract than the last? What if this injury turns you into a superstar?” Cole shifted against me, clearly displeasured by the combative tactic I was using.

“Okay?”

“Cole. Anything can happen. Good or bad. You can’t control it.. so let’s just not think about it. It’s tearing you apart.”

“Because it’s my future! Don’t you get it?” Cole sat up, careful not to hurt me. I was quick to sit up as well, folding my legs criss-crossed on the couch as I watched his head fall into his hands. His once calm breathing began to pick up once again.

“The future isn’t going to sneak up on you Cole! The future is a second from now. A day, three days. It’s a fucking week or a month. It’s not going to come and assault you in an alleyway one day. You’re thinking too much. The physician, physical therapist, your coaches, they’re all working with you. They’re all making sure you get back on the ice. And they’ve been telling you that you’re recovering well. You’re doing great! Why don’t you see that?” I was impatient as I waited for an answer. Waited for Cole to look at me, or show some sign of understanding.

“I don’t know.” His voice quivered again. His chest heaved with a deep and quiet cry. He desperately needed that week off. He needed that week with his family. With his mother and his dog. Olive was the best at cheering Cole up.

I slid across the couch, draping one of my arms over his back as Cole cried quietly.

“It’s okay to be worried,” I whispered, resting my other hand on his thigh. “But you can’t let it consume you. You have to talk to people.” I didn’t know how we got there, but I knew it was because of his own stubborn behaviors. If he simply would have spoken to me before, we could have worked this out. And even despite knowing that, I couldn’t be mad. I couldn’t blame Cole for whatever reason he chose not to communicate, because I knew he didn’t do it to spite me or hurt me for not understanding. “You can’t let yourself get here, Cole. This constant state of panic won’t help anything.” I pressed a kiss to his head. “Things are going to turn out okay, but you need to allow yourself to see that. Please… let me help you see that.” I felt his body lean into my own, and I wrapped my arms around him once again. “There’s nothing to worry about.” I whispered, “take it one day at a time.”

✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾

#nhl imagine #nhl x reader #cole caufield blurb #cole caufield x reader #cole caufield imagine #cole caufield #ella’s inbox #ella’s updates #ella’s asks

[finelinevogue]

distant promises

summary - Bucky has been on a mission for a long time and you miss him

warnings: insomnia, long-distance relationship, swearing, Christmas sadness (only slightly)

pairing: boyfriend!bucky x reader

word count: 2k

Bucky had been gone for 6 months now.

He was currently on a mission in the French Alps, taking down some military base that had connections to HYDRA. The mission meant a lot to him, not thanks to having been tested on and tortured with over a multitude of years. It had taken him a while to be comfortable with who he was and rid himself of the Winter Soldier. You could see him coming accepting himself for who he truly was more each day. He wasn't afraid of who he was anymore and it was an honour to have helped him through that. 

It was currently 1 in the morning and you still had yet to fall asleep. You had been finding it harder and harder to fall asleep as the months went by without Bucky. It certainly didn't help that you were taking extra shifts at Starbucks, in order to pay off some debts you owed to banks and Bucky. 

Bucky kept telling you to cut back on the shifts and let him pay off some of your debts you owed him too much already that you couldn’t justify anymore. 

So insomnia it was.

You honestly couldn't think of what you'd done to deserve him.

You honestly couldn't think of what you'd done to deserve him.

Turning in bed to check your phone, you started scrolling through your Instagram to like photos on your dashboard. There were some pictures of friends who were out clubbing, singing Christmas songs at the top of their lung. There were also some celebrities posting magazine shoots and as always there were the cat accounts that you religiously followed.

You were scrolling and liking for about ten minutes before you had an incoming call from Bucky.

"Hey Buck." You sounded surprised that he'd called you. Normally it was too risky to call since he didn’t want anyone to track his phone and give away his location, but here he was.

"Hi babe." You could hear the smile in his voice.

"What's up?" You asked as you snuggled further under the warmth of your fresh, clean, duvet.

"I saw you were active on Instagram, but I know it’s really early morning where you are so I just wanted to make sure everything is okay?" 

Knowing that Bucky kept tabs on what time it was where you were was just one of the small things he did which meant a whole lot more than anything his money could buy you. 

"Yeah everything's good.” Buck stayed silent as you answered, knowing there was more to it. “It’s, um, just that I wish you were here with me." 

"Oh darling, I miss you so much. I promise you it won't be long before I see you next." Now it was your turn to remain silent. "Y/N? Please don't cry darling." 

“Sorry.” You sniffled, getting yourself worked up over something so trivial.

"Hey, no. Don’t apologise. I have to go really soon love, but I'm not going to hang up until I know you're alright."

"No need to worry about me Buck. I'll be alright." You tried to say as happily as possible, but you knew Bucky would catch on that what you were saying was far from the truth. 

"Babe, you know I worry about you constantly." He laughed.

“Like literally ALL the time.” You heard Sam shout in the background, making you laugh.

"Is Sam there?" You asked Bucky.

“Yeah. Y’wanna say hi?”

"Mhm." 

"Y/N I can’t deal with this emotional softie anymore." Sam said without a hello.

“Emotional softie? Are we sure we’re talking about the same man?” You teased Bucky, knowing that he most likely had you on speaker phone.

“The bionic-dude right?” Sam made himself laugh and you heard a grunt from what sounded like Bucky punching Sam. You rolled your eyes over their stupid playfulness, before Bucky came back to the phone.

"Yeah, that's enough of that.”

“Surprised you two have kept each other alive.” You laughed to Bucky, eyes feeling heavier now that you’d safely heard from him.

“Barely.” You shuffled again in bed. “Okay darling, I have to go now. As much as I don't want to I'm gonna have to love you and leave you. Just promise me you'll try and get some sleep?"

“As long as you promise to come home for Christmas.”

"I promise." 

“Then I promise too.”

"I love you." Bucky just kissed the microphone to make it sound like he was really kissing you. You kissed yours back and you both stayed on the phone for another minute as you wrapped up your goodbye, before you attempted some better sleep.

•••••

Needless to say, when you woke up the next morning you felt awful.

There was still no surprise Bucky waking up next to you. There was a lack of smell on his side of the bed where he should be sleeping. There was no mess on his side of the room or whistling from a silly tune he’d make up. 

It was going to be another day without him and with only a few days until Christmas, you were starting to lose hope on spending it with him. 

Your scheduled alarm went off at 7am for your morning shift. You aspired to open up your own cafe one day and so you wanted to get the knowledge of how business operates and be able to tackle customer experience first hand. That’s why you worked in Starbucks. You were also taking an online degree in finance and business, to help you for when you open your cafe.

You got ready by putting on your black jeans and the Starbucks t-shirt. You threw on your basic vans and grabbed your bag before going out the front door to work. Starbucks was about a 30 minute walk from your shared house. Normally Bucky would drive you, because that's the gentleman he is, but because he hasn't been here you've been walking to work. It’s mostly a pleasant walk, but you hate having so much time to yourself and your thoughts.

Your manager told you that you'd be managing the shop floor today, meaning you had to give all the employees individual jobs, whilst help make the drinks and also be in charge of the tills’ money. It was going to be a stressful, but worth the experience. 

Plus, anything to keep your mind off Bucky and how he was doing

It had been about 2 hours into your shift and you'd managed to get through with no complaints, so you’d given yourself a break. You weren’t feeling hungry just yet though, so you just got a cappuccino and went into the back office for your 20 minute break.

Not even 3 minutes into your break one of the employees came in.

"Hi Y/N. Sorry to disturb you but there's a customer out front who wants a manager to complain to." 

This was a reason why you didn’t want to be a manager all the time, because you were really bad for getting upset when someone shouted at you. 

"Ok. Thanks Nina. I'll be there in 2 seconds." You wiped your hand around your mouth to make sure there's no froth left behind and then went back out front. "Nina, where are they?" You asked her, as you couldn't see anyone obvious who looked like they wanted to complain.

"Umm..." She scanned the room. "Oh, that gentleman sat by the window over there." She pointed to a man who had his hoodie slightly pulled up and was looking out the window. 

Walking over, you wiped your clammy hands on your red apron because as much as you put on a brave face sometimes social interactions gave you anxiety. You took a deep breathe before being prepared to get screamed at. Why anyone would want to scream and shout this close to Christmas you didn’t understand. Where was the Christmas joy? 

"Hi. I'm Y/N. My colleague said you had a complaint?" You asked politely. 

"Yeah I just wanted to complain that this cup of coffee is not nearly as good as the one that my girlfriend makes at home. So, why is that?" He turned around to you and took down the hood from his head and sunglasses off to look directly at you.

You took a step back, reaching for the counter to support yourself from fainting in disbelief.

Bucky was in your Starbucks making a "complaint".

You covered your face with your hands as you sunk down to the floor crying. You were so shocked that he was actually here that you didn't even know how to act. He laughed at as he stood up from his chair and slowly walked over to where you were crouched down on the floor.

You stood up and looked around to see customers and colleagues smiling and Nina was filming the whole thing. "You knew! Oh for fuck sake!" You cry-laughed, as you pointed at Nina.

"Surprise?" 

You just shook your head. You could hear Bucky laughing at the whole situation - a laugh that you'd missed more than you'd allowed yourself to believe.

"Do I not get an ecstatic run, jump and a hug from my girlfriend?" Bucky joked, holding his arms wide open for you to be engulfed in.

"You're a knob!" You joked at him, shaking your head because you couldn't get over he was actually in front of you.

"Sam said you'd say that!" 

You slapped your hand on your forehead when you actually realised what was going on. "What the actual fuck? You're really here?"

"I'm worried it's taken you this long to realise it, darling!" His arms were still wide open. 

You laughed as you ran and jumped into his warm and loving embrace. You wrapped your arms around his neck and legs around his waist, whilst he wrapped his arms firmly around your waist to support you from falling. You started to cry again whilst inhaling his sweet cinnamon scent. He just smelt like home. "I'm going to have go on missions more often if it means I can surprise you like this!" He said, but you were too busy crying over the fact your best friend was back in your arms.

"You're actually here." You whispered into his neck.

"I am, love. I am right here." He whispered back to you, pressing a multitude of kisses to the side of your face. "I'm always going to be here." You didn't care that he was being the stereotypical smushy boyfriend, right now you were just glad you were back with each other.

You let each other go. Bucky wiped your tears away with the sleeve of his hoodie and kissed your forehead.

"I've still got like 2 hours of my shift left." You said, wondering what he's going to do now.

"Yeah, fuck no. I spoke to your manager and she was more than happy for you to go home early. With me, obviously." 

"Really?" Your eyes lit up over the thought of spending the rest of the day glued next to him.

"Let's go home and get some well deserved sleep for a change." He took your hand and squeezed it, just once more for reassurance that he was home with you.

#bucky barnes blurbs #bucky barnes fight #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fluff #finelinevogue ficmas 2022 #finelinevogue ficmas #ficmas

[animeyanderelover]

I recently saw a post where some people on Tumblr were mentioning that in posts the reader is often depicted as really small. So I decided to make the s/o in this story a bit taller, we're talking about 5 feet 8 inches. It'll probably be irrelevant because Toji is really big but I wanted to start somewhere. Also, despite writing an astonishing 8.4k words, there isn't really any mentions of any Yandere stuff yet. This was more of me establishing the key characters and introducing the conditions. I'll start writing Toji's downfall into obsession in part 2.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, overprotective behavior, jealousy, paranoia, abduction, violence, death

The CEO and her bodyguard

“(y/n), I just wanted to let you know that…(y/n)?”

The little woman let out a mildly worried sigh when she found you, your upper body sprawled over the large desk made out of mahogany in between a mess of different documents and other papers. Soft breaths escaped your mouth, your face smushed against a pile of the many documents and contracts. There was barely any light in the room, the earliest morning hours were still painted in only the busy lights of Tokyo with a dark sky to. The only source of light was the lamp placed on your desk. You didn’t stir much when she screeched and as soon as she realized that you were only asleep, she let out a relieved sigh.

She carefully walked closer to you, glancing at your sleeping face before reading briefly over the many documents and contracts messily placed on your desk. Her shoulders sagged a bit in defeat. She had carefully arranged and sorted them for you but of course you had to make everything so unmanageable for yourself. At least you had finished everything as far as she could tell. After all the deadline was in a few hours. Unbelievable, sometimes she wondered how you’d managed to inherit the Ito company in the first place.

She placed the files she had carried in her arms down on the desk, although it was a little struggle to find space on the table where you hadn’t scattered all the contracts and documents. After that she slowly tapped you on your shoulders to wake you up. As much as she would have loved to let you sleep since she knew that you had finished everything in one of your spontaneous night actions when the final countdown before the deadline gave you the rush of motivation and concentration to actually sit down and work, she had something important to discuss with you. Not to mention that it couldn’t have been good for your back to sleep in such a position.

The smaller woman slowly placed one of her hands on your shoulders before gently starting to shake you, hissing your name quietly out.

"(y/n)! (y/n)!"

You let out an incoherent grumble, slowly shifting your body up in the chair in such a slow and stiff motion that reminded the other woman of some depictions and movies she had seen featuring zombies. The low and weird groan you let out whilst sprawling your stiff limbs certainly added to that effect. You let out a jawn when you were finally seated straight in the chair, blinking a few times as you collected your still groggy mind from your sleep. When your eyes met the smaller woman standing right in front of your desk, you gave her a silly and sleppy grin.

"Aki-chan. What are you doing here?"

"Checking if you're done with the work you were supposed to do until today." The smaller woman answered you, watching with slight amusement and some concern as your frivolous grin was replaced by a slight frown when she mentioned something including 'work' before your eyes widened as you remembered what she meant.

"Flipping heck! What time is it?!" You shouted startled, the chair creaking ominously as you nearly jumped out of your seat before your hands flew to the wonderful mess on your desk. You gathered all wildly and completely out of original order placed documents close to you, hastily going through all of them.

"It's twenty past five in the morning. So we have roughly 40 minutes left before Sone-san has to deliver everything to our main building. You have finished everything, right?"

Her last word sounded slightly worried as she saw you hurrying through all the many papers and contracts, reading everything written on it rapidly to see if you had signed everything and had also finished your own thoughts, ideas and plans involving the future course of your industrial empire. You slumped down into your chair with relief written on your face when you were sure that you had done your job properly before arranging everything into a messy pile and handing it over to Aki with a sheepish grin.

"You may wanna rearrange that a bit because I already forgot in which order they were supposed to be in." You scratched the nape of your neck as you saw Aki throwing you a short glare.

"Not like you actually ever did this in the right order. You probably just grabbed what seemed most interesting for you at first and worked your way through everything randomly." Her grumbling voice made you chuckle a bit.

"Am I that obvious?"

"I've known you for nearly 20 years. Believe me, I know how your gears turn around up there."

Your eyes landed on the other pile of thick files she had brought with her and your face fell into a mildly mortified expression.

"Oh, you're kidding me! I just finished work! Do I have to do somethhing else now?!"

You let out a frustrated groan, banging your forehead against the mahogany wood. Gone were your hopes of going out for a while and touch some freaking grass after having been stuck in your apartment for nearly 2 weeks. Yes, you had a big apartment that had cost you about 2.3 million yen with a rooftop garden, four bedrooms, two jacuzzi baths and a restricted entry since the elevator of this place didn't go up to the fourth floor unless someone had the right key or you pressed a special button in your apartment which enabled the elevator to go up to the fourth floor. But that was no substitute for trailing down the buzzling streets of Tokyo, Shinjuku or Shibuya and visiting your favorite izakayas and bars.

"Those files don't mean any work for you. This time at least. This is actually something Sone-san, I and a few other people from Ito company have been planning to arrange for you since a while now. It's for your own safety."

Aki remarked, going through your finished work and slowly trying to sort all the mixed documents and reports back into its original order whilst throwing some glances at you. She looked weirdly serious, more serious than she already was. That probably meant that whatever those files included something unpleasant or something specifically unpleasant to you.

You cautiously eyed the pile of files she had brought with her before pulling it over. This time you weren't just scattering everything around as all of them looked from the outside identical so you grabbed the topmost file, opened it and read through the reports inside of it. Your eyebrows furrowed before you dropped the first file quickly on the desk before grabbing the second one, scanning rapidly through it before continuing this process through the next couple of files. Your facial expression gre more and more confused as your forehead had formed deep furrows, your eyebrows pulled together.

"Aki, what is this?" You asked her slightly flabbergasted as your gaze wavered back and forth between her form and the currently opened file in your hand.

"What does it look like to you?" She replied to you, sighing as she asked you this question as if already being able to predict your incoming reaction to the news.

"Well..." You started, tilting your head shortly as you gave the file a conflicted look. "It looks like you collected me a bunch of data for different highly acclaimed and trained bodyguards. If I wouldn't know any better, I'd say you're trying to force a babysitter onto me. But this has to be wrong."

You gave her a light laugh as you looked at her, waiting and praying for her stoic face to crack and tell you that this was a prank. Instead you were met with a serious look on her face, not a single muscle moving as she gave you that cursed look she always gave you when she was about to put you through something you would never do on your own account. When you were met with her unchanging facial expression, your own expression fell.

"No."

"Yes, (y/n). Yes."

"Why on earth would I need a bodyguard?!"

“For the very same reason you were forced into your apartment for the last 2 weeks.”

“You’re overreacting! Just because some random suspicious looking guy stumbled into the building and threatened to see me by essentially trying to break through the security doesn’t mean that I’m in immediate danger!”

“He had a knife with him!”

“He didn’t use it! Also, he didn’t get past the security anyways! Aki, you are-“

She lifted her index finger warningly which quickly made you shut up. Her eyebrows were twitching ever so slightly and she looked like she was having a headache. Then she just gave you that look that reminded you of an angry and disappointed mother.

“(y/n), I understand why you’re frustrated for being isolated like this. However, no one at the company wants a repeat of the incident 3 years ago. You’re too important for the company and as a CEO you have a responsibility.”

Her voice was matter-of-factly with just a slight edge to it that made you shrink the tiniest bit under her gaze. Impressive, considering that you were visibly taller than Aki. You pursed your lips when she mentioned the incident a couple of years ago.

“All of them were arrested or killed anyways so why do you mention it?”

“Because we believe that the guy who stumbled into the campus was a former member of their group.”

“…What?! B-But I thought…”

Your voice trailed off as you sank further down into your chair, a shocked look on your face as you digested the news Aki had just given you.

“We thought that too. However, turns out that a handful of them still exist outside. Their group has suffered irreparable damage so we at least don’t have to concern ourselves with any assassination attempts. What is very likely though is that they’ll try to come for the CEO of the Ito company. They’ll come for you. That’s why we need you to have a bodyguard.”

You spaced out for a moment, deep in your thoughts before you seemed to snap out of it. You tentatively reached for a folder of the many Aki and Sone-san had prepared for you and opened it, giving it this time a bit more time to scan through the detailed records and information of birthday, height, weight and experiences. Needless to say though, you still looked not entirely convinced.

“(y/n)…”

Your friend started, your eyes flickering away from the folder to look at her. Her stern expression had faded away for now as she looked at you with a more sympathetic and worried gaze.

“If you don’t want to do it for the company, do it for me. Even if the risks are lower, I don’t want to lose you.”

Wow, this warmed your heart. You were touched. Dang it, she won. You blew out some air as you just nodded.

“Fine. I’ll go through all of this and pick someone. Can’t leave you all alone after all. What would you do without me? You’d die out of boredom.”

“I could say the same about you. Without me you’d probably drown in all the paperwork or would literally forget any important appointment.”

~~~

Your eyes were glued to the ground as you walked through Tokyo's busy streets. It was early afternoon and you mindlessly picked up some of the things people walking past you were chatting about. You'd spent a considerable amount of time going through the folders, reading through all of the information Aki had collected about each and everyone of the bodyguards she had hand-picked herself. On the surface all of them seemed immaculate and you would have expected nothing less from your best friend. From snipers to professional boxers to martial art masters, all of them were experienced and skilled. Each one of them would be an excellent choice to protect you and yet...something just appeared to lack. You couldn't even put your finger around what it was besides that none of them had captured your interest.

They all seemed like terrible company and that would be a problem considering that your bodyguard would essentially be your second shadow. All were trained professionals and perfectionists, valued their work over fun and enjoyment. That shouldn't have been a surprise considering that Aki had picked all candidates as she herself was far too reserved and analytical most of the time. Of course she would want your bodyguard to have the same values as her but the problem was that that meant that you'd be stuck with an uptight and far too logical man for most of the day. Honestly, you wanted a drinking budyy who would cut you some slack instead of judging and scolding you instantly.

What gave you even more of an headache was the information Aki had given you. That there might still be some survivors from that assassination group. 3 years, it had been 3 years since that incident. Now the Ito company had you as their official CEO, the first woman in the history of the business. You'd done your best, hadn't you? Thanks to you business was flourishing and you had broadened your influence by melting together with smaller companies, branching out in different areas. You were doing good, weren't you? You owed them that much...

You abruptly stopped, trying to swallow back the dwelling feeling that was stuck in your throat like a lump. You didn't want to think about it anymore. The sound of laughter and cheers caught your attention as you lifted your head up. You were standing in front of a small alleyway. An izakaya was somehow cramped inside there and you didn't know if the inside of it would be as small as the exterior made it look like or if it would actually be more spacious. Loud noises came from inside and a whiff of smoke and food blew against your face. Your feet moved on their own accord as you walked inside through the shoji doors.

The smell of cigarettes and different foods intensified when you stepped inside as did the chatter of the many guests inside. Quite a few of them were smoking, puffing on their cigarettes whilst enjoying glasses filled with beer or some sake out of small wooden cups. Strangers were bumping elbows with each other, enjoying food and alcohol under the golden glow of the lights. A counter with a few seats facing the small and cramped kitchen was the first thing you saw, behind the counter the rest of the room was plastered with tatami-mats, a handful of low tables on it.

The owners of the izakaya, an eldery couple, greeted you kindly as you entered. Almost all of the places were taken, only two seats at the counter remained free and since you had entered now anyways and it would have been very impolite to leave again, you sat down right in front of the counter. You looked around, soaking in the carefree atmosphere inside this place before your eyes were drawn to the little TV hanging on the wall. All eyes of the customers were drawn to it and it dawned on you just then that most of them had some sort of ticket in their hand with numbers written on them. On each ticket, one specific number was encircled in red and when you took a closer look at what was played on the small TV, you realized that it seemed to be a horse race of some sort. So they were gambling, huh?

The small women, still taller than Aki though, approached you from behind the counter, offering you one of the tickets.

"Do you want to buy one too? You just have to stake your money on one of the numbers 1 to 7 and if the horse with the right number you bet on wins, you'll win 15000 yen."

You looked surprised around the interior, counting roughly 20 customers, yourself excluded. Then you turned around to look at her again.

"Wow. Will you financially be fine? I mean, you have a lot of customers and if a couple of them have staked on the right horse, you'll rid yourself of some money quickly."

"It's fine. We only do something like this twice a year. We have a lot of loyal customers here so we would like to give them back something for choosing to visit our izakaya as frequently as they do."

15000 yen really wasn't much, it was a grain of dust in comparison to the mountains of money you received and transferred everyday. You didn't plan on revealing your identity though, it was rather refreshing just feeling like a normal person enjoying her daily life as opposed to being known as the CEO of the arguably biggest and most influential company in all of Japan and having to uphold some sort of image. So despite your tiny voice of reasoning, you bought one ticket from her. And in the true spirit of a gambler, and also because you were woefully unaware of which horses in the race had a track of winning or not, you just went with a random number. You ordered some beer and Yakitori as well, watching the announcer introducing all of the horses since the race would soon start whilst also interviewing some of the horsemen and how they felt.

You initially didn't look up when you heard the owners of the izakaya shouting 'Welcome!' when another person entered through the shoji doors, your eyes drawn to the TV as you took tiny sips out of your beer. It wasn't until the person slid down on the only available seat which happened to be next to you. That's when you stopped sipping from your beer, your lips still attached to the glass as you stopped focusing on the TV. You didn't quite know how to describe it but you could sense some sort of powerful presence from next to you.

"Old lady, give me one of those tickets."

You turned around as you heard the sound of his voice, his range very unique. When you saw the mass of a man sitting next to you, your eyes became as wide as saucers. He was massive! Packed with muscles anywhere to the point where you were sure that he must have felt like a rock if you were to touch him. He had black hair, green eyes and a scar on the corner of his mouth that only added to his wild and roguish vibe. His clothes were casual, although his black shirt was so tight around him that you could clearly see the outline of every single portion of his upper body. He was ridiculously handsome, you had to admit that.

You were so caught up in admiring the bear of a man sitting next to you that you sort of forgot that you were staring at a stranger who looked like he could kill a man by flicking his forehead. So caught up in fact that you initially didn't even realize that he had noticed how you were looking at him.

"What are you staring at?" He asked you, his tone partially rude as he looked down on you. Despite his somewhat rude exterior, and damn intimidating one too, that didn't derogate your pure amazement in any way.

"You're really tall, mister. And muscular too. I think I've never met someone with such a physique." You told him in absolute awe, feeling somewhat a bit excited about sitting next to someone like him. Your self-proclaimed sixth sense told you that you should definitely try to get to know this one better.

"Are you like working out really hard to have such a body or were you just born with it?"

Your eyes finally left his muscles and looked up to meet his own gaze. One of his brows lifted up the slightest bit as he mustered you and the curious and excited look on your face. Apparently he hadn't expected you to compliment and then proceed to ask him for his way to have acquired such a body. His body looked sculpted, far too perfect for any human to ever achieve. Both of you just stared at each other, the gleam in your eyes sparkling as you looked for him, waited for him to say something whilst he seemed to think about what to say to you that would actually make you shut up. You didn't know if you were imagining it but he looked almost a bit puzzled with the way you were looking at him and responding to him.

Your face almost fell when the stranger decided to ignore you, ordering instead some takoyaki and draught beer before turning his attention to the TV. You were just about to try to spark a conversation with him again when the izakaya suddenly errupted in cheers and yells. Your head whipped around as you realized that the horse racing had started. Even the owners had joined in watching. Was gambling that popular and beloved? Would Aki allow you to enter that business too?

The desire to try to have a conversation with him was still there but you quickly let yourself be taken away by the excitement of the other customers, joining them in their cheers and shouts of encouragement. You didn't even care about the horse you had bet on and you forgot about it after a while too, just soaking in the atmosphere and allowing yourself admist the yakitori, the beer and the excitement, laughter, roars and yells of everyone else who had gotten at this point a bit drunk to forget all of your worries. It was an amazing moment for you and you made a note in your mind to definitely visit this place more often. When finally one of the horses with the number 5 crossed the finish line, you cheered for it regardless of whether it had been the horse you'd placed your bets on or not.

Collective groans and a couple of cheers echoed throughout the cramped interior as winners and losers either celebrated or lamented over their choices. You picked up an annoyed scoff from the man next to you and when you turned around and saw the slightly annoyed look on his face, you knew that he belonged to the group of people who hadn't made the right bet. Well, not like you were one to talk. You had also just picked a number by sheer coincidence. Ah, talking about that...

You pulled out the lot you had brought from the old lady which you realized you had stuffed in the pocket of your suit. You couldn't even remember which number you had chosen. You held it in front of your face...and just stared at it. The nice old lady happened to glance at the encircled number on the lot as she cleaned up all the empty glasses and plates on the counter.

"Congratulations, Miss. You've won." She told you in a warm tone as you were still staring somewhat dumbfounded at the number five you had staked your money upon. This was your first time ever gambling like this. Maybe you should try it more often? Or maybe not because Aki would surely make your ears bleed if she'd ever catch you gambling and wasting your money.

"Huh...Lucky me, I guess." You muttered to yourself. You were better in this than expected. You looked up to the guy sitting next to you and you actually caught his gaze lingering on you, presumably because you had made the right choice and won. Then he turned his head around, looking disinterested as he gulped down the last bit of his beer before suddenly standing up. Was he planning on leaving already? Was it because he had lost? This was bad, you had planned to chat a bit with him. You looked down on the winning lot and then back to him leaving and decided that in all honesty, you already had enough money.

"Hey! Heeey!" You called after him so that he would notice and turn around. He did turn his head in your direction and so did a lot of other people but you didn't care much. Most of them were drunk anyways and the 2 or 3 glasses of beer you had consumed yourself had certainly given you some courage. Not that you didn't have enough already.

"Do you want this?" You asked him, holding the lot with the winning number on it up. He tilted his head a bit and you could see his green eyes glaring at you. Geez, had you said something wrong?

"Keep it for yourself." He answered before turning his back to you. Now you were probably going to be an 'annoying leech' as Aki sometimes called you but unfortunately for you and everyone else around you, you could be awfully persistent when it came to something that caught your interest.

"Why? Don't you want the money? That's the whole reason why you got so pissed when your pick didn't win." You spoke as you walked hastily after him. A part of you knew that this wasn't without any danger because he seemed like someone not to mess with but you were curious right now. Also, you would like to get to know him better. Apparently he didn't appreciate being followed like this as he abruptly turned around and you nearly crashed into him. If looks could kill, you'd be dead by now. He really was damn intimidating. He'd make a good bodyguard with that body and his look...

"I don't want your stupid lot." He repeated himself, his glare unrelenting and you would have lied if you would have claimed that you weren't a bit scared right now. You swallowed heavily but still, walking away now would just make you look stupid and like a coward. You didn't want that either even if literally no one would have blamed you for it.

"Then tell me why." You insisted.

He stared at you, you held his gaze as good as you could. You were slightly frightened but also quite defiant right now. Eventually the anger partially faded as annoyance took over yet surprisingly, he answered you. You didn't know why. You had either expected him to just leave or knock you out. Perhaps it was a sign of some respect for you actually showing some guts in front of him?

"I don't need your pity."

"Pity?" You repeated after him slightly confused. Then your face lightened up with realization. “Ah, so that is what you mean! Don’t worry, don’t worry.” You waved your hand dismissively.

“I earn enough money already as it is so those 15000 yen aren’t really much to me. And before I let you leave and walk along the streets with a look on your face that would make everyone think that you’re about to kill someone, I’d rather just give it to you. Instead of the rich people getting richer, wouldn’t you want to take it instead to make your visit here at least worthwhile? If you don’t want it though, I’ll just give it to someone else here.”

You held the ticket a bit closer to his face, looking at him with big eyes. The look of anger had transformed into something else. It almost appeared like he was a bit flabbergasted as he scrutinized you as if you were an alien. The lot in your hand was left ignored and after a while you just let out a disappointed sigh.

“Fine. Be an idiot and ignore me then. You’re no fun after all.” You grumbled as you turned around and marched back into the izakaya to just hand it to someone else. You stopped though when you felt his hand reaching out for the lot and tugging it out of your hand. You spun giddily around as he observed the lot in his hands before sparing you a quick glance.

“Don’t think too much about it.” He spoke before walking through the shoji doors to collect the money. You waited outside for him. A question was burning on your tongue that you wanted to ask him. He didn’t look exactly surprised when he came outside and saw you still standing there although he did look a tiny bit annoyed.

“Listen. Just because I took the lot from you doesn’t mean-“

“Are you strong, Mister?”

Once again, you managed to make his tough exterior crumble for a short moment as you interrupted him in favor of asking him your question. He looked for a second or two puzzled, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Do I look like I’m not strong to you?” He asked, putting one of his hands on his hips as he gazed down at you in an attempt to figure you out.

“Oh, you look like you could break someone’s neck with ease. I just need to see for myself.”

“…Why do you want to know anyways?”

He was actually engaging in a conversation with you! Perfect! Now you only needed to convince him.

“Because I’m considering hiring you so that you can work for me.”

He hadn’t expected your answer. The bewildered look on his face appeared again, observing your face as if thinking that you were joking only to figure out that you were dead serious.

“You’re not joking, are you?”

“I am not. So, I need you to tell me where you are working so that I can talk to your boss and convince him to let you leave your current job so that I can make you work for me and-Hey, where are you going?”

“What are you? A moron? What makes you think that I’ll work for you just because you gave me 15000 yen?”

He didn’t even turn around as he casually walked away from you. How infuriating! However, now you were fully invested. You just needed to catch his attention somehow again.

“You’re talking quite big. But I bet that I could convince you to work for me in 10 seconds.”

The provocation did its job. He halted in his steps and slowly turned around.

“Hoo? You think that it’ll be that easy?”

“It will be.”

You replied confidently as you pulled something out of your handbag. A piece of paper alongside with a pen.

“What’s your name?”

“…Fushiguro Toji.”

You started scribbling something down on it before walking to him, holding the check in between your index and middle finger.

“If you still reject after this, you’re either the most strong-willed person I’ve met or the biggest idiot I’ve ever met.”

He ripped the check out of your hand, his gaze on you for a few moments longer before he read what you had written on the check. The first thing that caught his eye was the ridiculous sum of money written on it. You had mentioned that 15000 yen wasn’t much for you but if you could casually throw out such a huge sum of money, you were even richer than he had expected. The other thing that caught his attention was the name written on it, presumably your name. (l/n) (y/n).

Wasn’t that…?

“Are you…?”

“Yes, I am. With that knowledge in mind now, what do you say?”

The corner of his mouth was pulling itself slightly up as a cocky grin spread on his face.

“Are you always walking around and throw money at whoever you deem you want to work for you? Must feel nice, being so dirty rich as you are.”

“I don’t do that with just anybody. I am stuck most of the day either in my office at work or in my office at home so if you believe it or not, you’re the first person I’m doing this with. Also, if I am as ‘dirty rich’ as you call it, I might as well use my money.”

You weren’t all that stupid after all. He could at least acknowledge that.

“What would you do if I would still decline?”

He wanted to test you, you knew that. Perhaps to abuse you a bit since you were showing so much interest in him right now.

“I would probably be quite upset and try to still convince you until I’m forced to quit and find someone else who will do the job for me. Then I’ll probably find someone or something else which will catch my attention and my interest in you will disappear until you’ll only remain as a small memory in my head. You’re at least memorable enough so that I won’t forget you like I do with 90% of the people around me.”

You were pleasantly surprised when he huffed amused when hearing your honest answer.

“You have no filter, do you?”

“No, I usually say what I think.”

“What would you want me to do if I were to work for you?”

“Tell me, Fushiguro-san. Have you ever been a bodyguard before?”

"...Bodyguard, huh?"

~~~

"Can you drive a little bit faster?"

"May I ask why? You seem to be in an awful rush ever since (y/n)-san called you with a request to pick her up?"

Sone Kazuma always had to be so worringly calm and collected. Which on the one hand made him perfect for his role within the company as one of your closest assistants but she felt like he was sometimes a little bit too soft around you. Almost acted like the kind grandpa when around you.

"She calmed me randomly and begged me to pick her up because she had a surprise for me. I do not trust her sudden burst of joy. If it is one of her idiotic ideas again, she'll have to walk home on her own to reflect on herself."

"Am I driving or are you?" Sone replied amused from behind the wheel as he saw the wrinkles forming on the younger woman's face before she leaned back in her seat. She observed the many streets outside and all the cars passing by the window. She could only wonder what you had come up with this time.

"Is it here?" Sone asked her, his question pulling her out of her thoughts as he drove into a parking in the middle of a block with lots of cheaper apartments available.

"It is. She should be around here somewhere." Aki replied as Sone drove around in search for a spot, parking it in an empty spot before she finally opened the door and exited the car. Her eyes were wandering around the place as she couldn't help but wonder why you had chosen this place to be picked up. Sure, it was easier in a more empty street for Sone to find place to park compared to the busy and full streets of Tokyo but she couldn't help but feel like this was a bit dangerous. Especially if some members of the assassination group were still lurking around.

"Where is she? She's late." Aki grumbled as she pulled out her flip phone and dialed your number in, prepared to call you and give you directions if you should have gotten lost somehow.

"We just arrived, Aki-san. Let's wait a bit longer for (y/n)."

He gave her a reassuring nod and she decided to try to take his words to heart as she put the phone back into her backpag .

"5 minutes. No more."

It was rather quiet in this part of Tokyo as most of the population in the city were either at work or walking around in the full and lively streets and it was rather strange. Aki enjoyed the silence though, she wasn't the biggest fan of overly crowded places as it was personally hard for her to properly concentrate under such conditions. She followed the hand on her watch as it slowly ticked away.

1 minute, 2 minutes, 3 minutes...

"There she is. Seems like she found us."

Indeed. When Aki glanced up and followed Sone's gaze, she saw you waving from across the parking lot. Then her gaze landed on someone big right behind you and for a short moment, her usually composed mask wavered a bit as she saw the person right behind you. Massive and tall were the first things that came to her mind as he, she assumed at least that it was a man, trailed closely behind you. For the shortest split of a second she feared that he might be after you but even you couldn't have been dumb enough to not notice a person as tall as him following you so closely. Not to mention that she actually saw you turning around to him, pointing in her and Sone's direction. She glanced at Sone only to see that he had kept his calm smile, although she saw the flash of curiosity as he watched you getting closer, urging the other man to walk a bit faster.

"Aki-chan! Aki-chan! I did it! I found one!"

You cheered happily as if you had just accomplished a sublime feat and wanted her to praise you for it. Aki on the other hand couldn't stop focusing on the man behind you who she could now actually see clearer now that he was so close. A tight black shirt, dark trousers which were more on the baggy side and, from what she could at least tell, green eyes. She pursed her lips, her eyes nervously darting back and forth between you and him as she tried her hardest to suppress the fact that she was slightly intimidated now. You were already quite a bit taller than her and frequently teased her about it but even you didn't look as tall anymore in comparison to your unknown companion and if she would have stood right in front of him, the top of her head wouldn't have even reached his shoulders.

She had seen tall people before but never someone who had possessed such a pronounced physique with muscles over muscles layered across his body. She held the saliva back that she had almost swallowed just now as she attempted her best to put appear unfaced as she slowly tore her gaze away from him. She bit her tongue when he spared a glance down at her and seemed to grin slightly as if sensing her fear.

"(y/n), who is this?"

"My new bodyguard! Isn't he great?" You gestured excitedly at him with the same troublesome infatuated excitement you always held as soon as you found something extraordinary or had a new 'great' idea.

"What?"

"My bodyguard. You wanted me to choose one, right?"

For the first time in quite a while, Aki was actually left speechless as she just stared at you, spacing out in the process. He hadn't been on the list of candidates she had handed you earlier this morning. You had really just done it, hadn't you? You had picked a random man you had met on the streets and had handed your safety and security over to a total stranger. It was almost surreal.

"No."

"Yes, Aki. Yes." You replied, nodding happily as if to enhance your point. She felt the urge to lash out for a bit as the frustration bubbled hotly up in her chest but she tried to compose herself as good as she could. You had a good eye despite sometimes acting like you had been dropped first on your head as a baby, you wouldn't take this subject lightly. Esecially not with them possibly still around.

Her eyes were almost spitting fire even if her face was mostly emotionless as she looked up at him.

"You, what's your name?"

"Fushiguro Toji." He replied as he held her gaze, unfazed by the passive-aggressive tone she had just used to refer to him in a slightly rude fashion.

"What is your current job?"

Green eyes glanced at your own as if asking if he really had to answer all of those questions. When you gave him a weak nod, your eyes begging him to just go along with Aki's sudden interrogation, he rolled his eyes.

"I don't have one."

"You don't have one?" Aki repeated in a dissatisfied tone, scrutinizing him more sharply all of a sudden.

"I take some jobs when they're offered to me, receive my payment after I'm finished and then leave and wait for the next employment offered to me."

"So you're some sort of freelancer?"

"You could say that."

"Is that so?"

You could tell that Aki wasn't convinced at all judging by the way she eyed Fushiguro suspiciously. There was some tension in the air as both of them were glaring at each other and even if the height difference was almost painful to witness, Aki held her own ground well against him.

"Okay, everyone. Let's stop looking at each other as if hoping that the other one will drop dead all of a sudden. We should drive to my apartment instead to finish all the formalities. Fushiguro-san here has to sign a contract after all." You interfered as you stepped between those two in an attempt to appease both of them.

"You're really serious about hiring him? A random man you just met on the streets?" Aki inquired once more as she gave you a long and serious look. Your awkward smile fell from your face as you saw the hidden concern in her eyes, the sceptism if he was even trustworthy. And you couldn't blame her for it.

"I know that this is very sudden and I know that it looks really stupid. But you just have to trust my intuition right now. I have a feeling that he'll be the perfect choice."

"You're putting your safety and life in the hands of a stranger you just met because of your gut feeling?"

"Yes. I'm trusting my instincts here. I'm not going to ignore what my feelings tell me anymore."

He observed the sudden change in your facial expression half-interested as it suddenly matched Aki's serious expression whilst also noticing your little friend's own determination wavering as she witnessed your own.

"What about you? Why did you choose to suddenly work for her?" She eventually asked as her eyes flew to his form again, this time inspecting him more neutrally.

"For the money."

She let out a sigh, although she didn't seem to be very surprised. At least she hadn't expected anything more from him.

"Of course that's your answer. Are you suited for the role though? Can you really guard her against anything and anyone that might endanger her life?"

"Are you underestimating me? That's the second time someone has questioned me about my own capabilities today."

His green eyes shortly darted to you as he said this and Aki felt a wave of relief washing over her when she understood that you had been the first one to question him about it. At least you hadn't hired him completely blindly.

"I assume as long as the payment is right, you'll fulfill your job then?"

"That goes without saying."

She appeared to consider it thoroughly as she glanced at him, glanced at you, glanced at him again before her eyes were averted to the older men standing a few feet away from all three of them.

"Sone-san, what are your thoughts?" She asked him for his help, still quite a bit conflicted about this entire situation.

"I say that we give him a shot. From his looks alone he seems to be promising and if his motives lie only in money I don't think we have to worry. The Ito company is unmatched when it comes to wealth and influence so he shouldn't stray away from us. I have a hunch that it's better to have him on our side than to have him as an enemy."

That sounded surprisingly more shady than Toji had expected from someone so kind-looking but on the other hand people in power were rarely not corrupted somehow.

His own opinion finally seemed to cause Aki to give in as she let out a incoherent grumble before giving you the best angry look she could muster.

"If he messes up even a bit, I will have him fired and then I will pick your next bodyguard myself."

~~~

He had to hold a grin in when he saw Aki shuffling out of the car as soon as they arrived at their destination. She had appeared to sit under fire the entire care ride despite her hardest attempt to not let anyone notice. Her rigid body had told him something different though. You on the other hand had busily chatted with Sone as he had driven all four of you to your apartments. Apparently all three of you lived in the same building with the roof and the fourth floor belonging entirely to you, Aki owning one of the two apartments in the third floor and Sone living in one of the three apartments on the second floor. Otherwise the building was uninhabited since it was only for people who worked extremely close to you and despite Aki's greatest displeasure, he would be living there too. As your new bodyguard it would be wisest after all to have him all the time as close to you as possible.

Toji had to admit though that he was a bit disappointed when he saw the exterior of the building, the most boring grey sad thing he could see everywhere else in this city.

The interior however, looked far more pleasing. The first floor was the lobby of this place. An empty reception desk to welcome the most likely limited visitors into this place and, for whatever reason, a water fountain embedded into the wall. A few paintings were hung up on the walls, some showing some landscapes of cherry blossoms or landscapes and others looking like someone had given a toddler some colours, a canvas and told them to just left them alone with it. Well, all that money had to be wasted somewhere after all.

It got more interesting when all four of you got into the elevator and Aki pulled out a key, sliding it into the key hole within the lift and turned it around. One of the buttons, the one someone had to press in order to reach the fourth floor, suddenly lit up and Aki left the key in the hole as she pressed the now functioning button.

You noticed Toji's eyes resting on the key and took it upon yourself to explain to him.

"You need such a key in order to reach the fourth floor unless I'm in my apartment and press a button in my own apartment which would also allow it to reach up to the fourth floor. Currently only Aki, Sone-san and I possess such keys."

"Do I get one too then?"

You wanted to answer but were interrupted by Aki.

"Not just yet. I'm not allowing you to have one unless I'm convinced that I can trust you."

He let out a scoff through his teeth but didn't push it any further. Losing such a job with that much money offered to him would be too much of a shame.

Your own apartment was at the end of a longer hallway and already made everything look fancy and special but he couldn't help but be actually impressed when you unlocked the door and let him and the other two inside. It was huge with lots of rooms inside. He could have probably spent a good amount of time exploring each and every room but he was ushered by Aki to follow her as she marched into what appeared to be a living room.

A sliding door was right next to him and seemed to separate another room from this area. Despite the space you had for yourself, there were surprisingly few pieces of furniture. A TV installed on the wall, a modestly sized couch and what appeared to be a desk for you to do all your work on.

"This is where I live. I also have a garden up on my rooftop."

You welcomed him, gauging him for his reaction. You were just hoping that he wouldn't just see you as a spoiled and rich woman for your apartment. It hadn't originally belonged to you. You had just been forced to take it after the previous owner had been unable to live in it anymore.

"You have a garden on the roof?"

"Yes, she has. But we didn't bring you here for sightseeing."

Aki told him quickly and matter-of-factly before letting you actually offer him to show him the roof which was completely irrelevant to why he was here.

"Where exactly will I be livingthen? On the third or second floor?"

Hmm...I think having you on the third floor would be more convenient because you would be closer to me. What do you think, Aki? Would that be alright with you if the two of you would be neighbours?"

She didn't look thrilled about it at all as she threw him a side glance.

"Do whatever you want." She mumbled after a few moments and turned her head away from him, resigning herself to her fate.

"That was easier than expected but I'm glad that this is settled. Sone-san will give you the key to the other apartment on the third floor then." You said, looking mildly surprised at Aki as you had expected her to argue more.

"Don't get any wrong ideas, I think we should focus more on the contract and explain all the rules and conditions to him instead of quarreling where he will live because he will live in this building anyways and I'll have to see him regularly for now no matter what. So-"

"Ah! Before I forget it. Fushiguro-san, do you have any family? Children? A wife? Someone else, regardless if it is a relative or friend? If there is anyone, I could arrange for them to live with you or at least in the same building."

Aki arched her eyebrow as if she had expected you to have asked him such a question already but decided to keep quiet. You looked expectantly at Toji.

"There's no need for that. I'm by myself."

Pt.2

Tags: @saiyara05

#yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere jjk #yandere toji #yandere fushiguro toji

[lonelycowgirls]

Girl on Film

New Harry and Stella content! 🌟🎉 *the crowd goes mild*

I know it's been an AGE, but I've been working on this on and off for a while and I just wanted to get it out there, but it just wasn't happening...

But here it is – I hope you all enjoy as much as I did writing it, certainly made me feel some type of way 😏

Please like, reblog and follow if you enjoy it!

My asks are also open for feedback and ideas to how this universe can continue.

Nel xo

~

“So, I had a patient come in today, who I haven’t seen since her six-week scan, and she said I look good because I’ve put on weight?” Stella said in a questioning tone, pulling her hair back with her fluffy hairband.

“Oh, right,” Harry nodded, turning the corners of his lips down in consideration, then returning to carefully shaving his chin. Stella frowned at him in the mirror and crossed her arms, after popping the cap back onto her micellar water.

“Well, have I?” This was dangerous territory, the way Harry responded now would determine how the rest of their evening would go – and he’d never mastered the right way to answer these types of questions, no matter how many ‘man-to-man’ chats he’d had with his dad and his friends.

“Have you what?” He said, words coming out strangely due to his stretched cheeks as he ran the razor blades carefully across his skin. He heard Stella scoff. Wrong answer.

“Put on weight, you dickhead. Are you even listening?” She resisted the urge to shove his side so as to not cause him to cut himself.

“Oh, right, I can’t say I’ve noticed, bub.” He mumbled nonchalantly as Stella’s chin pulled in with frustration.

“Well, that’s great, a woman who barely sees me notices more about me than my boyfriend who I live with.” Harry rolled his eyes as Stella marched out of their bathroom. He leaned against the double sink unit they shared and hung his head with a sigh, some remnants of white, frothy shaving cream still covering his chin.

This was typical Stella, she knew it as well. Knew that she could fly off the handle at the slightest thing – like she was made of gasoline and just a flicker of a match could cause an explosion. He’d put up with it for a long time, when a few of his friends and family members had told him to leave and find an easier life, he’d considered it for a week at most and then looked at her face again and couldn’t imagine being without her – temper and all.

Harry was a chilled out guy, he liked to think that they balanced each other out. He’d act as fresh water poured over Stella’s flame whenever she got too hot, and Lord did she know how to get him wound up when he needed it.

Yeah, they were a delicate balance, but didn't she ever piss him off as well sometimes.

Once he’d finished up and brushed his teeth, he shut the light off in their ensuite and slumped back into the bedroom with his tail between his legs. Eyeing Stella, she didn’t look up from her book from behind her glasses. She eyed his back when he turned.

Harry pulled the duvet back, sliding in beside her and shutting his lamp off. One arm resting on the pillow above his head, he shuffled to get comfortable and sighed, staring up at the ceiling.

“Was I too skinny before?” Stella asked after a few beats, taking a break from staring at the words on the page — having been on the same sentence for nearly 10 minutes.

“What?” Harry made a distressed face, running his palms across its planes – he was hoping he could just go to sleep and she’d forget about it by morning. “Babe, come on.” He said, rolling to his side to look at her.

“What? I’m being so serious,” she replied, shutting her book and chucking it on her bedside table. “I need to know if I’m living unhealthily.” She flopped her arms down by her sides, looking up to the ceiling.

“You know you’re not though, Stell.” Sure, Stella was on her feet for 15-hour shifts at least twice a week, skipped breakfast and only managed an average of five hours of sleep each night, but she tried to eat well and work out when she did get time. “What’s this really about? Why are you so upset by what this random woman said?”

“Do you really not see it? You never noticed?” Stella felt vulnerable, even after all this time with him, she felt uncomfortable looking him in the eye.

“I don’t want this to come across the wrong way…” Harry came up to lean on his arm, looking down at her and running a hand across her body over the top of the duvet. She chanced a look up at him, skepticism clear on her face. “I haven’t noticed, because I don’t think about it.” Stella opened her mouth to retaliate, almost sitting up but being pushed back down. “Listen,” He warned with a look. “I don’t think about it… because I’m thinking about how I can make you laugh next. I’m thinking about how much I’m looking forward to next sitting down in the evening and having a cuddle whilst watching Love Island or old Four In A Bed episodes, or some new drama you want to watch. I’m thinking about how gentle and loving you are with the cats. I’m thinking about how lucky I am to be able to come home to you, to your hugs and kisses. I’m thinking about how comfortable and cosy you make our home. I’m thinking about how you’re the best friend I’ve ever had… and the only partner I’ll ever want.”

Stella pursed her lips to keep a smile from bursting across her face, Harry moved to remove her glasses from her face, leaning in to kiss her, but she moved her lips away just before they connected. Harry smirked at her with a mock frown in his brow – now she wanted to play.

“You are such a sweet talker…” She said quietly, running her fingers back through his thick hair. “You should write songs.” Harry nodded with a dumb look on his face, like she’d just said she’d discovered that water is wet.

“That’s actually such a shout from you.” Harry nodded, dimple protruding from his smirk. He leaned in to rub his nose against hers, but she continued to dodge his puckering lips.

“You know what,” she said, pushing him back by his shoulder, his eyes growing darker and lulling now, routinely running from her eyes to her lips and back again. “I think it’s because you’re not on tour anymore.” She perched on one elbow to mirror him, creating a level playing field.

“What are you on about?” Harry laughed slightly, trying to pull her into him by her hip even when she pawed at his chest in protest.

“Think I’ve gotten too comfortable, when you’re not here I’m actually conscious of how I look.” She was being honest, he could tell by the lack of smirk next to his own. He shuffled forward, taking her further in his arms — with minimal protest this time.

“I don’t know how to respond to that.” Harry’s voice came out muffled as he buried his face in her neck. She chuckled, rolling her eyes and scratching his scalp through his hair.

“Suppose I should make a bit more effort around you, shouldn’t I, really?” She commented, “You are Harry Styles™ after all.” He brought his head out to look up at her with a deep frown, bordering on disgust.

“Nah, fuck that shit. Sloth about if you want to. Do you, sister.” She smiled softly at him. “Doesn’t make me wanna shag you any less.” She threw her head back in a lazy cackle, and he took that opportunity to press a few kisses to her throat.

“Is that all I am to you… a hole?” She shook her head at him and tried to move, only for him to pull her closer again – damn Brad for those inescapable arms.

“Now, now... you’ve got two other holes which I’m also very fond of.” He smoothed his hands down her sides. “Even if I only got to be in one for about two and a half seconds… and the other one only opens on my birthday.” He pinched at her waist and she gasped, slapping at his arm.

“Got that right.” She said smugly, leaning forward to kiss him firmly on the lips.

“Mmm, now that you mention it,” He bit his lip, nose still grazing Stella’s. “Your arse has been looking a lot rounder... fuller.” He cupped it in his hands, so familiar with the way it felt.

“Stooooop.” She pushed at him, yet again, to no avail.

“Can barely fit it in my hands now.” He was exaggerating, easily grabbing a fistful.

“Harry.” She chastised, trying to roll away. He flipped the duvet off of the two of them, exposing her naked figure.

“Let’s take a closer look, eh?” He instead rolled her to her front, she cackled, accepting her fate and running a hand over her face. “Ah, yes, I believe the mandem would call this, a bunda.” He smoothed his hands up and down over the bare skin, she laughed louder at him pretending to inspect her.

“Stop it, you idiot.” Stella, covered her face in embarrassment as Harry manhandled her arse with his fingers, kneading the flesh like dough.

“No? A batty then.” He questioned, licking a stripe up a cheek and then digging his teeth in for a bite. Stella gasped, feeling a heat pool in her abdomen. She looked down at him then, arching her back to push her bum out to his face. “Oh, so now you like it?”

One thing about Harry; he could make Stella feel like a supermodel. She felt incredibly average in her everyday life, whether it was doing the weekly shop or working the wards. But she always felt undeniably sexy with him — even laid bare before his eyes. When he manhandled her like this, she felt the urge to set up a camera to push record, just so she could watch it back to see herself with him. See him work her up from an outside perspective.

She flipped her hair over to one side, biting down on her lip as he pressed open-mouth kisses all over her arse, feeling herself grow wetter and wetter. She turned her head to watch him again, loving the sight of her gorgeous man worshiping her. His eyes were closed, almost in a dreamlike state, as he pushed each kiss with a small groan and a wet smack.

Ghosting his lips up the crack of her bum, Harry spread her cheeks and spat in the gap, causing Stella to groan. 

“Mm, yes… get it wet, baby.” She sighed out, her voice taking on that velvet tone that had him driving his hips into the duvet. Unable to wait and knowing exactly what she wanted, Harry continued to massage her cheeks up and outwards while he went to town on her hole. He glanced up to watch her burying her face into the pillow, clutching it and groaning from her chest. Unlike when he went down on her up front, Stella could never look directly at him when he ate her arse. She loved it, but he knew she’d never straight up ask for it, so he’d have to take the lead to bring them into the position they were now in, so that she could enjoy herself without embarrassment.

Forcing her hips back into his face, Harry growled and brought his hand down with a smack, followed by a harsh grip, making her arch and throw her head back. Keeping his lips attached to her hole, he cupped under her hip bones and lifted until she was up on her knees, her sacred parts fully displayed out for him. Before he had a chance to get his own fingers on her, she was rubbing slow, deep circles into her clit, moaning from her throat, hair coating her face as she pressed into the pillow.

He smirked when their fingers brushed and moved back slightly to spit at her again, licking and smacking his lips against her puckering hole that was clenching in rhythm with her heavy breathing. Her fingers came to move in tandem over his on her clit, allowing her to guide her own pleasure.

“Fuuuuuck me, I’m gonna come, love your fucking mouth.” Curses tumbled from her lips but before she could reach the apex, she was flipped to her back. Harry grabbed her wrist as she bounced back on the mattress, hair a disarray and chest and face carrying a delicious flush, and placed it back on her pussy. She immediately began her furious ministrations again.

“Come, baby,” He ordered, lying on his stomach, face inches from where her fingers were flying, he spat on her once more to keep her going. “Let me see that pussy clench.” He held her legs open and she winced over the stretch pulling at her inner thighs. At last, silently screaming, Stella’s mouth went agape. Her chin dropping to her chest, eyebrows drawing in almost impossibly close and finally breaking eye contact as they rolled to the back of her head. “Yes, yes, yes.” He chanted, mesmerised.

Seconds of silence were finally met with a deep growl from her throat as her head fell back on her shoulders and she convulsed in ecstasy. Harry pulled her wrist away and attached his lips to her clit, sucking it like a sticky sweet. Every breath that escaped her lungs was paired with a small high-pitched moan, her nails digging into her boyfriend’s head while her hips rutted into his face.

Harry could tell she was coming down, after years of pleasuring her he knew her body almost as well as she did. He moved to press soft kisses across her labia, continuing up to her soft tummy, each full breast and up to her neck. Her ankles locked around his lower back as she draped her arms across his shoulders — feeling consumed and divinely pleasured. 

Harry rutted up into the backs of her thighs, “You’re such a little sex pot, aren’t you,” another rut, a moan from her, “could watch you play with yourself forever.” Another rut, “We should film ourselves.”

“Oh, yeah,” She sighed over a laugh, shaking her head. “Can’t imagine what could go wrong there.”

“No one will ever see, baby.” Harry whispered, darkly, running the tip of his nose up her cheek, pushing a kiss into her temple. “Wanna take you away with me, I’ve been in love too long… I’m too grown to be missing you… touching myself like a teenager over just the thought of you… your body… the way it feels… the way it responds to me… wanna have something to really remind me.”

It’s like he was drunk, all this mumbling, he was drunk on her. On them. It was all Stella could do but to lie back and take it, they didn’t even need to place him inside her, he just rutted until he slipped in, a soft gasp leaving her lips as he slid along her walls. 

She caressed the side of his face with the tips of her fingers, both of their bodies pressed together and rocking back and forth together. It was intense — Stella had never cried during sex before, but the feeling of burning behind her eyes suggested a first time for everything.

Harry’s pubic bone continued grazing her clit, so right that it was almost maddening. Stella couldn’t control her moaning, it was nearly too much. His strong hips sped up consistently until their breathing was mingling together in a tangle of hot air and she was clinging to him for dear life.

“Baby, baby, baby, fuck!” Stella squealed rhythmically as they rocked, “God, Harry.” She cried in disbelief and tried her hardest to keep her eyes on his, she couldn’t bare to miss a moment of the look on his face — just so enamoured, present and fucked out. They needed this so badly. She ran her thumb over his bottom lip. “I love you…” Stella was feeling every emotion, Harry had done what only he could, he’d stripped her walls and made her submit. “I’m beyond in love with you, Harry.” She breathed out with a moan that had Harry tearing up, but also speeding up. “I’m part of you.”

“Fuck…” Harry cursed, holding his mouth over hers and panting over the excursion of his hips, his masculine instinct kicking in. He was fucking her like an animal fucks his mate – like it was the last thing he’d ever do. 

When he finally came, it was with a juvenile whine as she held his chin between her thumb and fingers and clenched down hard, and she was reminded of her gentle and sensitive lover. She brought him down to kiss her and his repetitive, high-pitched moans vibrated on her tongue. Rolling off of her, they both laid with their arms splayed out, Stella’s head still resting on Harry’s forearm. She stuck her tongue out at the icky feeling of his come dribbling out of her, but could barely feel her legs to move to the toilet.

“You get sooo emotional when we fuck.” Harry panted, energy spent, droplets of sweat running back into his hairline.

“Shut up, I can’t help it.” Stella weakly hit his rising chest with the back of her hand, making him laugh. “Your dick triggers me.”

“Nah, I love it. Never change.” She smiled at that, rolling slightly to throw a sticky leg over his hips.

“Oh, don’t worry, this temper and batty isn’t going anywhere, baby.”

~

Read more from the Been There All Along universe here!

#harry styles #harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic rec #harry styles angst #harry styles imagine #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shot #harry styles smut #harry styles fic

[multific]

If He doesn't Scare You, No Evil Thing will

Cruella!Helmut Zemo x Reader

Words: 5.5K

Summary: Helmut Zemo, the best designer, a cold and manipulative man. You, a barista, a kind and gentle person. Nothing common between you two yet fate had its ways to toy with you.

A/N: None of the above pictures are mine, all rights go to their owners, especially the beautiful work of art by @enstatia which inspired this whole story.

Baron Helmut Zemo is the best fashion designer in the entire world.

He was rich, smart and elegant. He was adored by some and hated by many.

He wasn't a gentleman, he was rude and cunning, and he always got what he wanted. In the name of fashion, he had done many terrible things.

The Sokovian noble born became a well-known name in the entire world after his first collection.

Most people knew him for his famous furs, others knew him because he liked to crush the competition, literally.

He always said, fashion isn't kind, so why should he be?

You were always fascinated by fashion, even if you didn't have a taste for it or the money to afford it.

But Zemo's collections always stood out for you, you spent many many hours looking at his clothing. His taste and creativity were beyond everything you could ever imagine.

But you will never be able to afford anything of his, working in a coffee shop certainly didn't give you the paycheck of your dreams, if you were honest you barely made enough to live but you dreamed big.

You let out a long sigh as you were getting ready to close the store finally. A long shift and you were the only one remaining to close it all up.

Just as you were sweeping the floors, a man came rushing in, he was heaving, he clearly had a run, but who would run in a suit like that?

"We are cl-"

"PLEASE! I need a double espresso urgently."

"Sorry, Sir."

"I NEED that coffee or my boss will kill me! Please! I pay extra, double, triple whatever but I need that coffee." he was desperate, probably a new started who was trying to impress their boss.

"Okay." you ended up saying. "But! This is the first and only time! You have to come next time during open hours!"

"Thank you! THANK YOU!"

You made the coffee as best as you could in your tired state before handing it to him.

He really did leave a nice tip for you and was soon out the door, running.

You shook your head and closed up.

The next day, everything went normally. Customers came, left, some leaving you nice tips.

Then, when you stood behind the bar, he arrived again.

"Hello. Coming this time during normal hours." he laughed lightly. "Look my boss really liked the coffee you made for him, so I'll have to come here regularly from now on, maybe even more than once a day. So, I'll always order the same, double espresso, like you made yesterday and for me a cappuccino."

And just like he said, he came to the store every morning at 7:50 sharp, ordered the same thing every time and occasionally, he arrived in the afternoon.

"I do see why Boss likes your coffee, the cappuccino you made for me was amazing."

He was your first regular customer. He told you he worked for a big company and had a husband and a german shepherd. He was talkative as if he didn't have anyone to talk to about these things during the day.

Then, one day, he didn't come in the morning.

It was strange coming from someone sharp.

But, you went on with your day, and just as you were ready to close, the front doorbell sounded off.

It gave you deja vu.

"Sorry, but we are closi-" you stopped immediately when you noticed the man in front of you.

Baron Helmut Zemo.

The leading man in fashion, in this little store.

"I didn't have my espresso today, you see my assistant got sick."

That explained a lot, like how he was always so dressed and in a hurry.

You didn't know what to do. To deny him coffee would be a death sentence.

He sat down at a table like it was the most casual thing.

You made him the coffee, just like you always did.

"Anything else I could get you?" you asked as you placed the mug in front of him.

"No, thank you." as he picked up the mug his hand brushed against yours.

He was much nicer than people made him in their stories. Maybe he was having a good day, you didn't want to poke around, so you left and went back to whipping tables and cleaning the floor.

When he finished, he left you a good tip and without another word, he was off.

Everything happened so fast, you wondered if it was even real.

In the end, you convinced yourself that it couldn't possibly be Baron Zemo, and you just moved on.

The next day, the assistant guy didn't come nor did Zemo so you really must have been imagining things.

However on the third day, just before closing time, both arrived.

"We are still in time right?" asked the assistant, whose name you just remembered being Bucky. "Can I also get a slice of that chocolate cake please?" he asked as he ordered while the Baron sat down. You knew better so you acted like a professional and served them both.

And while they talked about work, you cleaned the tables.

"Y/N." you heard your name being called, nearly making you jump. "Can you help us?"

"No need to bother her, James, I know what I want."

Bucky rolled his eyes as you walked over, you looked at the drawings in front of them.

Two beautiful suits, one dark with fur around the neck, white with black dots, reminded you of dalmatians, the other suit just as beautiful, dark green with gold embellishments. Both are similar styles for a very very rich man.

"Which one do you think is better?" you looked at both of them.

"Both look really nice."

"You have to pick." said the Baron and you picked up both papers.

"I like this one better." you said placing the dotted one back on the table. Zemo had a smirk on his face while Bucky huffed. "But it's missing something." you said as your eyes were glued to the paper.

"Boss said the same thing." said Bucky before taking the other drawing and putting it away.

"Is it for a man or woman?" you asked as it wasn't clear from the drawing, your question was for Bucky but Zemo answered.

"It's for me. It will be made out of fur, real fur, but as you said, it's missing something. And I'm not going to the fashion show with an incomplete piece."

Then you remembered something.

"Do you have pencils?" you asked and Bucky nodded, he gave you the box of coloured pencils.

They both watched you as you did something.

You showed them both.

You added red gloves. Ones that were missing on the fingers.

They both went silent. Completely silent and you knew you messed up.

"I-I'm sorry. I ruined it." you were about to place it on the table when the Baron grabbed it and looked at it.

"He loves it." said Bucky. "He always has that face when he loves something.

"Incredible! You have an eye for fashion!"

"I really don't, Sir. I just-"

"Come with me to the fashion show in Rome! I need your eye, your talent is impeccable."

You tried to refuse, you really did. But it was hard to argue with a Baron. And in the end, you had to go. Because who were you to say no?

You told your boss you are sick, so you won't be able to make it for two weeks.

You couldn't believe you were going to miss work, but the nice check the Baron put into your hands was twice as much as you made in three months.

"For your time." he said when he placed it into your hands. And you nearly doubled over at the amount written on it.

"This is too much."

"Not at all. It's barely anything for your time." he said as he left.

You learned he loved to have the last word.

And now here you were, looking into your wardrobe, realizing just how poor you were.

You didn't even have decent clothes to wear to work let alone to the biggest fashion event!

Then the packages arrived.

Clothes, some were so new they weren't even announced just yet.

And a simple note that the delivery guy handed you as Bucky carried the boxes into your tiny apartment.

'Wear these. H.Z.'

A simple message, you couldn't question it. Then you realized you never even tell him your address let alone your sizes to be able to send you clothes.

"Bucky? How did you know where I live?"

"Oh, easy, Boss told me, he had a feeling you wouldn't have any dresses for a fashion event, so he sent me along, you should try them on."

He sat down on your couch sipping a glass of wine.

Just where did he get the wine from? And how did his boss know where you lived?

And again, you couldn't say no, so you tried everything on. If you were honest you were impressed and also happy to have Bucky there, you had a great time.

Then, the day came.

But instead of Bucky, a driver came to pick you up. It was a luxurious car which drove you to the airport.

You didn't even dare to talk to him, but you do remember his name when he introduced himself, Frederick.

He looked like the kind of intimidating guy who was actually really sweet and kind. But you rather not push his buttons.

"Here she is." said the Baron as you got out of the car, a luxurious jet awaiting the two of you. "James sadly couldn't make it, his husband had an accident and he wanted to stay with him. But fashion doesn't wait so it will be the two of us on this trip, I hope that is okay with you."

"Most certainly." you said as he lead you into the jet and showed you where everything was.

You weren't sure why you were even there, because he liked your idea of red gloves? Because you made good coffee? Why were you there?!

"I can almost hear you thinking, how about we do something creative instead of your worries." he thought you were scared of flying. You weren't. But it was a better excuse than the fact that you had a very handsome and rich man sitting right across from you and it made you nervous.

He placed a couple of drawings in front of you, all with women's clothing this time, gorgeous gowns and suits.

"Which one should be the centrepiece of my show?" he asked as he leaned back in his chair, watching you closely

You looked at him for a moment before looking at the table, why was he asking you? He must have one already.

Collections don't come out unless you have one, do they?

You looked at him as he was sipping some champagne before your eyes moved across the drawings.

Was this a test? It had to be. He had to be toying with you. Or it could be genuine, but you had your doubts.

You picked the dress you liked the most and he nodded.

He didn't comment or ask anything, he just simply nodded and left it at that.

---

When you arrived in Rome, your breath was taken away. This lifestyle. This level of luxury that came so naturally for him was something you never even imagined.

You got a room in the most expensive hotel, your room was more like an apartment. The view was gorgeous.

And again, you asked yourself, what were you doing there?

Then the phone in the room rang, and you picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Ah, Darling, let's go and get something to eat, you must be hungry from the flight." It was Zemo.

"Oh, sure."

"Let's meet in the lobby, 10 minutes?"

And sure enough, ten minutes later, there he was, standing in the middle like a King in a gorgeous deep wine-red suit. While you had jeans and a shirt on... great. You should have changed.

As he turned and saw you, he did make a face, he hoped you didn't see, but you surely did.

Half of the things on the menu, you couldn't even pronounce, so you stuck with something you knew, hamburgers and fries. It also worried you that you couldn't find the prices.

Zemo got something very Italian. By the sound of it.

It looked really nice, some nice pasta, cheese, but your burger, oh, your burger was everything.

It was so delicious, you nearly went blind eating it. And the fries were beyond this world.

"I hope you are enjoying yourself, is your room appropriate?"

"More than that. I have a huge balcony, I can see the Colosseum from there!"

"Glad to hear that you enjoy it. What about the dresses? I sent you a couple, do you not like them?" his brows furrowed as he pointed at your top.

"Oh, they are beautiful, but I just wasn't sure when to wear them."

"Whenever you see fit. They are yours after all." he said that but he clearly didn't mean it. He wanted you to wear those dresses, it was clear.

"They cannot be mine, they are way too expensive." you argued as you thought he only gave them for the trip.

"I made them just for you, they only fit you." you really didn't want to believe him.

But you went along with it.

You knew better than to argue with Baron Zemo himself.

Later that evening, you sat out on the balcony, taking in the view then suddenly something hit you.

"Did he say he MADE them just for me?" sudden realization hit you like a train.

---

The first day of the fashion show, you felt really out of place. Even with the beautiful dress you had on, you didn't feel comfortable at all.

You were nervous as you entered the car and you were even more nervous when you realized that there are paparazzi.

"Take deep breaths, don't look into the flash and you'll be fine. And smile." Zemo said as he put his arm around you and guided you through the crowd. People were trying to ask questions but he only waved and smiled.

And then, you were inside.

The first show wasn't Zemo's. It was a woman's collection. Filled with colour and texture. Not really your style, but you just sat there, not making any faces. There were too many cameras watching, if they caught you at the wrong time, your life could be over.

"What do you think?" asked Zemo as he leaned over and into your ear. You were in the middle of watching another oversized coat walk down the runway.

"Not my favourite. Everything is too big, it swallows them." you said honestly, turning to him, hoping no one heard you.

"Quite right, My Dear." he said before leaning back and continuing to watch.

About three more collections later, that day was done.

And the fact that you didn't like anything... worried you. Zemo asked every time, how you like it, but you could never say a good thing.

How can someone be exhausted after such a day?

All you had to do was sit and smile occasionally when Zemo introduced you to people.

Oh, the number of men and women who could kill you with their eyes just to be standing next to the man who kept his arm around your waist.

He always introduced you as a friend, but the looks you received from people were not meant for a friend. They saw you as a threat.

But now, you were back at the hotel, sitting on the balcony, still in that gorgeous dress as you enjoyed your view.

You promised yourself that morning that you are going to enjoy your time here. After all, who knew if you would ever be able to make it back to Rome anytime soon or ever in your life for that matter.

"Darling?" the voice came from the room and it made you jump in your seat.

"Zemo?"

"Here you are. I see you do enjoy the view." he sat down next to you in another chair, looking at you, not the view.

"It's beautiful. How did you get into my room?"

"It is breathtaking. I came to ask if you are ready for dinner, I see you didn't change." he just completely ignored your question.

"I like this dress. And yes, I'm ready for dinner." you said as you looked at him, eyes shining but he didn't smile, he simply nodded and guided you to the dining hall.

Dinner was as delicious as the day before. You were a bit more daring regarding the food you ordered.

"Tell me about yourself." he suddenly said. Now you were glad you didn't have any food or drink in your mouth.

Why would he be interested?

But he genuinely looked like he cared, and what harm would it be to tell him?

Not like he really cared, he probably just wanted you to ask the same from him and after you told your story, you did ask him.

But he dodged the question and instead told you how tomorrow will go down.

A three-day fashion event. Was that too much or too little? You weren't sure.

But your second day was much like the first, except it was longer.

The day before Zemo made you promise that you'd wear the pink dress he sent you.

Much like the day before, he came to pick you up in the morning, complimenting you while he looked like a nicely wrapped box of bonbons.

The man looked way too good for his own good.

He sat in the car with you, looking out the window, you enjoyed the view.

"Hopefully today we will see something we actually like. What would you like to see?" he asked.

"I want to see yours." you said without any hesitation.

"Hm, you do have good taste." he said just before the car stopped.

Another day without seeing any interesting pieces. You did see one thing, a kind of duo chrome gown, it looked promising, but the back of it... horrible.

You made a face which amused Zemo. He did notice how hopefull you were and then you saw the back.

And now you learned that Zemo's collection will be tomorrow, the last day, the grand finale.

You were about to get dressed when there was a knock on your door, a woman came in with a gorgeous dress, you recognized it from the sketches Zemo showed you on the plane.

"Miss, Mr Zemo send us as he was required before the show. He sent us to get you there, we have a car ready."

The fact that you had to go alone scared you a tad bit. But you did understand why he would be there earlier.

You felt like a Goddess honestly, the dress was perfect. You can imagine him in his room, perfecting every detail before sending it over to you.

You knew he wouldn't give out anything less than perfect from his hands.

---

"To us." he said lifting his champagne, "To the perfect show." he said as you clicked your glass against his. You smiled as you lifted the glass to your lips.

"To you." you said. "Your amazing collection."

"Precisely." he said and nodded. "Wouldn't have been able to do it without you, Darlin’."

And then you suddenly realized.

It was your last day there, last dinner with him and you knew you were going to miss him.

You'll have to go back to the life of a barista. And you were okay with that. You never expected this to happen, so even the fact that it did give you a reason to go forward.

"Can I ask you something?" you asked when the waitress left after she poured you two glasses of wine.

"Go ahead." he said as he lifted his glass.

"Why did you invite me? What is your real reason? Because I'm still confused by it."

"Beauty is something I always thrived for. I always wanted to achieve perfection. With my clothes especially. When Bucky mentioned this new shop with the kind barista I didn't think much. But he started to mention you more and more. And then I went to see you for myself, you took my breath away. You inspired me as a muse would. Something I have never had. I always worked for myself, but now, now I create for you, Darlin’."

You still didn't want to believe him. You weren't that beautiful, you weren't even thin.

"I-"

"I know you doubt yourself. I see it in your eyes. But there is nothing to doubt. Your beauty is extraordinary. You might not see it, your body, and your curves would drive any man crazy, including me. And your personality, you are shining my Darling. Like today, in that dress, I couldn't stop looking at you. Breathtaking, you always look breathtaking but when I see you wear something I made, it does something to me."

You were not sure if this was some weird kink of his. Picking up unsuspecting broke women and then living a fantasy through them. But the way his eyes shined told you he wasn't lying nor was this a weird kink. Adoration is what you saw. But then, why didn't you believe him? Why couldn't you? Could it be what he said before? The way you doubt yourself, it can be getting in your way.

"I'm not that special."

"You don't see what I see. Do you think I get everyone on a plane to Rome because they thought of adding red gloves to a suit? You are exquisite, and I planned on seducing you. I'm not really good at the love department, but you are special."

Seducing you? Love? Well, the black suit he had on certainly didn't help your situation. He looked way too delicious for his own good. You couldn't think straight.

"Are you serious or are you playing with me? Is this some game rich people play?"

"No game, Darling. I'm serious about my feelings." this is when the waitress arrived with your food. He studied your face. "You do not believe me."

"It's hard to. It's hard to believe that a man of your level would ever be interested in someone like me. I'm a simple woman, a barista while you are the best fashion designer in the entire world."

"Do titles bother you that much?"

"When it's this huge, yes. What will people think? You with me? Me with you? They will think I blackmailed you, that I'm a golddigger or something."

"Don't be silly, Love. I do not care what others say about me. My work speaks for itself. But if you really are not interested, I'll understand."

"It's not..." you looked around, no one was paying any attention. "It's not that I'm not interested in you. It's just hard to process your declaration of love when your face barely moves."

"I trained myself. So I wouldn't get wrinkles."

Of course, he did.

"How can I prove myself? How can I prove that my feelings are true?"

"I don't know, honestly."

"I brought you on many dates. Every day, I saw every lunch, breakfast and dinner as a date. Even if you didn't. Which now I realize you might not have. I should have told you from the beginning, but I needed to know who the angel who made those amazing espressos was. And I really found an angel. I watched you as you worked, cleaned the store when you were ready to close and I walked in."

"I need to think." you said honestly.

"Of course, I never expected you to be ready with an answer. But please know, I am serious."

Rest of the dinner, you spent quietly, eating and trying to think.

Why did he have to look so delicious in his suit?! It wasn't fair.

Your mind couldn't even register that evening or the next morning, nor the flight nor when you stood in front of your apartment while Zemo's driver got your suitcases out. You arrived with more than you left with.

You turned and looked at Zemo.

"Thank you again for the opportunity and the amazing memories." he only nodded once before you walked away from him.

Zemo had a cold heart. His industry and past made him this way, but he could feel his cold heart break into millions of pieces as he watched you walk away and the door closed behind you. He got back into the car and headed home, home into the cold mansion where he lived all alone.

You couldn't even unpack. Your suitcases have been in the same place as you left them days ago when you arrived home.

So many thoughts yet your mind was blank, and your heart hurt.

But why was it hurting so badly? The look in his eyes as you said goodbye. It was as if he was a different person, not the kind Zemo you saw at the shows, not the Zemo who laughed with you as you looked at all the dresses and discussed them at dinner.

It was the cold and old Zemo who walked into your work many days ago.

Today was your day off.

You haven't seen or heard about Zemo or Bucky at all. You figured they were busy after such an amazing show.

You pulled out your phone and smiled as you looked at all the photos you took.

During many days you and Zemo went around Rome, being tourists he guided you through the streets as if he was living there for years.

How did you fail to see the look in his eyes? He took so many photos of you at your request and then you stopped at one.

It was a selfie of you and Zemo. You remember how grumpy he was but you ended up getting a picture where he was in the background.

Then photos of the last show, his show.

You took many photos of him.

And then, as if someone poured cold water all over you.

He was wearing the suit. THE SUIT, with the red gloves.

"You picked this one out." he said when you complimented him. At the time you only laughed it off not believing him.

And you realized your many mistakes.

You were too blind to realize what was happening right in front of you.

You fell in love.

You fell in love with him and you didn't even know it.

Now, the place on your waist where he always had his hand felt hot, burning. You couldn't believe how stupid you were.

How could you ignore his feelings? The way he looked at you, the way he held you and walked with you.

"I wouldn't have anyone else by my side, Love." he said one day and it all came crushing down.

You wanted to yell. Scream.

How could you done this?! Who cares about titles? Who cares about who he was.

All you cared about was him.

The way he looked at you, the way he smelled and the way he cared for you.

You rushed out of your apartment and got a taxi.

Only when you stood in front of the building you realized you had no idea what you were doing. You walked in and the receptionist gave you a look.

She probably had a strong feeling towards the crocks you wore, the sweatpants and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt.

"How may I help?"

"I'm here to speak with Helmut Zemo? I have an urgent matter." she gave you another look.

"Sure, I'll call security."

"No, please I'm serious, can you at least call him? Or his assistant? Bucky Barnes? They know me, I promise."

She only raise her brow as security started to walk towards you.

"Ma'am, please." one man said and you really didn't want to cause a scene.

"Please, just call Bucky at least, I really-"

"Y/N?" all of you looked at Bucky who just exited the elevator. "What are you doing here?"

"Mr Barnes we are about to get this lady out, I apologize for the scene."

As the bodyguard grabbed your arm Bucky almost growled at the man.

"HEY, let her go. I really don't think your boss would appreciate you touching her and you," he continued pointing at the receptionist. "You throw people out without confirming if we expect them or not?"

"Sir, sorry but I didn't think-"

"Exactly, you didn't think, but you wouldn't know so, I suggest you do your job properly from now."

"Yes, Sir. I apologize."

Bucky got you into the elevator as he looked at you. "What are you doing here?"

"I need to talk with Helmut."

Bucky smirked. "Oh it's just like a romantic movie, the heroine realizes her love for the cold hearted man and rushes to confess to him." Bucky said with a dreamy voice. "But wait! What are you wearing?!"

"I was home! what am I supposed to wear at home?"

"You need to change." he said as he pushed a different button on the elevator. "Hair, make up and dress."

And again, you knew better than to argue with Bucky.

About two hours later, you felt and looked like a completely different woman.

"Much better."

"I don't even want to know how much the clothes cost."

"Then don't ask. He's free now, probably in his office mopping."

"Why would he be cleaning?"

"Not that kind of mopping. He is sad because he let you go. SO ROMANTIC."

"Bucky." you said as you went up the elevator, top floor to finally do what you were ready to do 2 hours ago. "I'm nervous."

"Don't be. You wouldn't even have to say anything just go in, kiss him and boom. Wedding." you wanted to laugh. "Good luck." he said as he stopped in front of a huge door. He knocked before rushing off like a child.

"Come in." you heard his voice inside and you slowly opened the door.

He was sitting in his chair, his back to you. "What do you need Bucky, I told you I don't have the dresses, I don't even have ideas."

"Looks like you lost your muse." you said, your heart hammering in your chest.

"I did but why are you saying that?" did he really not realize that you were not Bucky?

"Why don't you get it back?"

"I told you I-" this time he turned and noticed you. He was, of course, wearing a suit, he look at you as if you were a ghost. "Darlin’? Am I imagining things?"

"No, and I'm sorry for being so blind. I came to tell you that if you want to, I'd like to try... us." you watched as he stood up from his chair.

"Are you serious?"

You nodded as he took steps towards you. He placed his palm against your cheek, leaning down to kiss you.

A kiss to make sure you were real, a kiss to finally mend and melt his heart.

When he pulled back, you smiled at him.

"You look stunning."

"Thank Bucky."

"Of course."

"But I do want my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt back!" he couldn't even comprehend what you just said. He was way too happy to fully process it.

---

That Christmas, you were already living with him.

You had a rather difficult time finding something for him as a gift, but then you came up with the perfect one and with the help of Bucky, you got just the thing.

You couldn't wait for his reaction to see it.

You smiled as you opened all of your gifts, clothes, jewellery, and a trip to Japan. Everything is absolutely amazing.

"Thank you, Babe, now, it's your turn."

"We said nothing serious." he said motioning towards the huge box you had in your hand which you just brought it.

"I know, open it."

Helmut looked at you and then at the box. He opened it, and then immediately looked up at you.

"What-"

You reached into the box and pulled out the small puppy and handed her to him.

"You can name her, she is a nine week old-"

"Dalmatian." he finished your sentence as he took the puppy from you. The puppy immediately started to lick his face. You smiled.

"You like her?"

He looked up at you and nodded.

"I thought I already had the best present be you, but this is amazing. Thank you, Love."

You pulled out your phone and took many many photos of him and the dog.

"What should be her name?" you asked as you watched the puppy sleep while you and Helmut cuddled on the couch.

"Cruella De Vil." you laughed slightly.

"Of course, you'd pick a name like this." you shook your head. "Cruella it is then."

You leaned over to give him a kiss on the lips as he pulled you even closer before another movie started on the TV.

Taglist: imreadinggoaway @fleursirvart​​ @v-2bucky ehsebastiancrunch-time-sports  @pxstelrainbow ablogbypeteparker liamssmilersmexylemony @greenarrowhead feelingsareharddd @thisismysecrethappyplace @sincerelyfan @theoneanna @aestheticsandmarvel @rororo06 @castellandiangelo @avengers-r-us @destynelseclipsa   @spilledinkindumpster celebsimagine @capsiclesdoll snoopy3000 @firstangeldragonranch @puknow @crazzyter  @alwayshave-faith @soleil-dor @alex12948 scream-kiwi79  @lxdyred  @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl​ @liveforkarljacobs @anonymoussherlockandmarvelgeek​​ @paola-carter​​ @stunkbiggu

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

            DO NOT REPOST OR TRANSLATE ANY OF MY WORKS

#marvel #Marvel character #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagine #marvel imagines #zemo x you #zemo x reader #zemo x y/n #zemo imagine #zemo imagines #helmut zemo x reader #helmut zemo imagine #helmut zemo imagines #the falcon and the winter solider spoilers #the falcon and the winter soldier #AU #disney au #cruella de vil AU

[funkletrunk]

“ I’m so sorry that they pick you last” - letter to my 13 year old self by laufey

pairings! + dazai osamu & reader

mentions of ada members, hurt no comfort, reader has anxiety !! enjoy

cross posted to ao3 @/mrfrunklewonk

The party was too cramped, neon lights flashing over the tipsy crowd. Bodies huddled together, dancing and drinking. To get through them all just to find your party was already a tiring mission on its own. One of the ADA members suggested that they go out to party, to loosen up a little. You weren’t much of a party person but they convinced you to tag along. The last thing you wanted to do was ruin your relationship with your colleagues, you were already unsociable enough to begin with. Focusing on work and only polite small talk when necessary. But he changed that.

Dazai bothered you every day nonstop, and whether it was his intention or not, he got you to open up. And his efforts certainly didn’t go unnoticed, the little outings, the flowers in the morning on your desk. You smiled a little more, talked a little more, and a little louder. You became brighter as a person and more sociable. You were still shy and quiet, don’t get that wrong, but he helped you open your heart to more people by forcing himself in there first. Your heart hammered, knowing he was going to be there. He was the reason you were going, having persuaded you while walking you home.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

“(Name),” His arms are behind his back, taking long strides next to you. You look at him, humming back in response as you observe his facial features. If he notices your ogling, he says nothing. “You’re going to come to the party right?” He turns to look at you with a smile while you, in return, look away. Your face scrunches as you think and Dazai's smile only grows wider at this. “I don’t know..” “It’ll be fun! Just come, and I’ll make sure you have a great time!!” You look back at his face, a wide grin stretched on it while he gives you a thumbs up. You sigh nod your head and chuckle as you watch Dazai celebrate your answer.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Not that you’ll let your coworkers know that, you’ll just let them think it was their “convincing” that made you come.

You squeezed through the crowds and saw familiar figures sitting in the distance on some sofas in the back. You smiled, getting a little excited as you scurried over to them. You made sure to wear a nice outfit tonight, hoping it’ll impress your coworkers and Dazai. You walk over to Kunikida who is standing rather than sitting with some of the others, scribbling away in his book (typical). “Hello Kunikida-san!” “Oh, hello (Name).” He barely looked up, acknowledging your presence in the slightest. You don’t take it to heart, though, you know he can get very absorbed with his writing. Your eyes drift over to Yosano, Ranpo, Tanizaki, and Naomi on the couch.

You walk over and try to find a space to sit, but there’s no more space so you just stand as you politely greet everyone. Yosano gives you a hello before going back to talking to a grumpy Ranpo, who does not acknowledge your presence at all. You figure it must be important and try not to start a conversation. Tanizaki and Naomi both waved with a small smile and before you could try talking to them, they went back to chatting together. You uncomfortably shifted, rubbing your arm and looking around. Everyone was busy and both Atsushi and Dazai were missing. (Kyouka and Kenji were too young, and Fukuzawa disliked outings like such).

You’re looking around and you see two figures approaching from a door to the left, walking towards your group. As they get closer, you realize it's the two missing members of the group and sigh a little with relief. Besides Dazai, Atsushi was second to make sure you felt most welcome as the newest ADA member. You admired his compassion and bravery. You wave with a smile to the two. Atsushi smiles weakly and waves back and Dazai keeps blabbering on in his ear, his eyes closed and his arms flailing around dramatically. Your smile drops a little, but you’re sure it wasn’t intentional so you grab Dazai’s sleeve and tug on it lightly. He quickly goes quiet, peeking open his eyes to look at you. He smiles at you, albeit it seems a little forced.

“Ah, (Name), you made it!” “Just like you asked,” You averted your eyes shyly and before you could speak again, Dazai's velvet-like voice cut through the air. “I’m sorry (Name) but I happen to have business with Atsushi tonight, could you please excuse us?” You feel your skin crawl and prickle with anxiety, suddenly snapping your eyes up to look at his shut ones. “You’re going to leave me on my own?” “I’m sure there’s another member who wants to talk to you” “Nobody wants to talk to me Dazai, I’ve been ignored since I’ve gotten here!”

Your breathing is fast, your heart rapidly beating as you feel your eyes prickle with tears. You watch as Dazai opens his eyes to observe you with a straight face. Atsushi is still standing next to Dazai, feeling awkward and guilty about the whole situation. “Then maybe you should go home.” You can barely register the words out of his mouth, head spinning and heart thumping. Your head droops, tears building up and threatening to fall. “Alright, I guess I will.” And you leave. You make your way onto the street, the cold night breeze stinging your tear-stained cheeks as you walk home. You can’t believe you thought this time would be different.

“Dazai-san, was that necessary? I’m sure she just wanted to have a good time with us! And is it safe to let a woman walk home on her own at this time?” Atsushi stares at Dazai, frantically spitting out each word faster than the last. Dazai stares at the door where she left before placing a hand on Atsushis shoulder. “She’s a member of the ADA, she’ll be just fine Atsushi.” Dazai smiles at him and waves him off to go get them both drinks. He looks back towards the door, hands stuffed in his pockets.

“Sometimes people just need to learn how to live on their own.”

#dazai x reader #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs dazai #bungou stray dogs #bungou gay dogs #hurt/no comfort #i cried #no beta we die like fyodor #one sided feelings but only if you squint

[ghostofskywalker]

Did I miss my window on the drunk drabbles!? Could I request drunk crosshair getting messy drunk? Pls <3 much love and remember to stay hydrated

no you're weren't too late :) i loved this prompt idea!!

words: 877

clone troopers masterlist

It was clear that Crosshair hadn’t drank in a while, because according to Wrecker he used to be able to handle his liquor better than the entire Bad Batch combined, but now it had taken barely three drinks before he was completely out of his mind. 

Slumped over on the countertop of Cid’s bar, he burped loudly for the entire room to hear, and Hunter just rolled his eyes with a sigh. You watched the sniper with a curious expression, checking to see if the glass he was holding was in danger of falling to the floor (or at least, that’s what you told yourself). 

You had held something of a fascination with Crosshair, having joined the squad when he was still working with the Empire. And now that he was back, you couldn’t help the way you wanted to get to know him, no matter how prickly and standoffish he may have seemed.

Hunter could see where your eyes kept shifting to, and he raised his eyebrows at you. “Just let him be,” he said quietly. “I think he has a lot of feelings that he needs to work through.” 

You nodded, but didn’t want to completely listen to the advice. Clearly he was more drunk now than he had been in a while, possibly more drunk than he had ever been. It didn’t seem right to just leave him somewhere to figure everything out himself, and when the rest of the Batch retired to the ship to go to sleep, you elected to stay behind. 

“Are you sure?” Echo had asked you, a concerned expression on his face. “I can stay here if you want, this way he has someone to make sure he doesn’t pass out in an alley.”

You laughed, patting the ARC trooper’s shoulder and shaking your head. “No, don’t worry about it. I know you’re tired, and I should be fine here on my own.”  He nodded, and only left the cantina after making you promise to comm him if anything went wrong. 

And just like that, you were alone with Crosshair. 

He was mumbling to himself at this point, and you wondered what else would happen before you were finally able to convince him to go back to bed. From what the rest of the Batch had told you about him, he didn’t seem like the type to cry while drunk, but you never knew. 

“Anotherrrr,” he slurred, holding out the empty bottle of beer that he had finished. 

“Absolutely not, Grumpy,” Cid said from behind the bar, shooting you a look that screamed get him out of here or I’m going to lose it. “You’re being cut off for the evening.” 

Crosshair mumbled something not-so-nice under his breath, and you snapped your fingers, causing him to look over in your direction. The stern expression on your face and the way you shook your head made your feelings clear. “Oh I get it,” he drawled. “You’re my babysitter for the evening. How does it feel to be stuck with the job nobody wants?”

“For your information, I chose to remain here and make sure you got back to the ship safely,” you snapped. 

“How noble, do you want a prize?” he sneered, and you tried to remember that this was likely just the alcohol talking. “Still, it wasn’t like anyone else was going to do it.” 

For a moment, you could read his true feelings through his expression, he was sad, and he didn’t know what to do about it. Instead of trying to argue the point further, especially to a man who would in no way remember this the next morning, you decided to try a different approach and try to herd him back to the ship. And for the most part, it was successful, once you managed to get Crosshair to an open area. He was certainly more drunk than he was used to, given the fact that he stubbed his toe twice (on two different tables!), and he threw up a little in Cid’s trash can on the way out. After he realized that you weren’t going to go away, and that you didn’t shrink away from his insults, Crosshair got a little easier to deal with. 

Once you finally made it back to the Marauder, you literally had to wrap your arm around his waist and get him into his bunk. Hunter was still awake, and he looked at you two with an odd expression, but you preemptively silenced any comment he would have made with a quick glare. 

The touches you shared with Crosshair seemed far too intimate for a man you barely knew, but there was no way he would have any recollection of this, which made it a little easier to process. You rifled through the medkit to look for a pain reliever, and you left two of them on the little ledge next to his bunk, along with a canteen of water for the next morning, because he was going to need it. 

And as you laid down in your own bunk, you tried to forget the feeling of him laying his head on your shoulder and his fingertips gripping your waist, but you knew that wouldn’t be happening any time soon.

#🍷 blurbs #tbb crosshair x reader #tbb crosshair x you #tbb crosshair #crosshair x reader #crosshair x gender neutral reader #crosshair x you #the bad batch fanfiction #the bad batch x reader #star wars x reader

[life-at-hogwarts]

Darkness within (House of Gaunt)

Pairing: Ominis x GN! reader

Warnings: mentions of drinking, intrusive thoughts, panic attacks, hurt/comfort

Word count: 3.3 k

“I’m sorry I’m making it so difficult. I wish I was easier to love.”

“Nothing about you is hard to love. In fact, loving you feels as easy as breathing. You don’t need to be ashamed of your scars. I know what I signed up for, and I haven’t changed my mind.”

Summary: Bromance. Violence. Trauma.

A/n: More emotional torture because that's just how I roll.

Chapter 5 of House of Gaunt

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 AO3

If you hadn’t felt the lack of sleep when you came back from your date night, you certainly felt it now. You had struggled to pay attention in your classes all morning. Partly because you were so sleep-deprived your brain could barely process what was going on, but also because just sitting next to Ominis made your stomach flutter. All you could think about was kissing him and your mind kept wandering back to the night before. Your distractedness cost you 5 housepoints in potions class when you accidentally added too much leech juice, causing the liquid to burn through the cauldron and flooding the potions stations of all those around you.

By lunch you were so exhausted you seriously considered skipping the rest of the day and calling in sick. You listlessly pushed your food around on your plate and fought the urge to rest your head on Ominis shoulder. The blonde had been quiet all morning, struggling to stay awake and was now resting his head in his palm, lost in thought, his meal still untouched.

“What’s on your mind?” you asked and pushed your plate away, officially giving up on trying to choke down lunch.

“Sebastian wasn’t in his bed when I came back. He must have spent the entire night in the Undercroft studying the journal,” Ominis sighed. “I’m worried about him.”

Since both of you had skipped breakfast, you had only seen your freckled friend briefly in class today and you hadn’t had the time yet to catch up.

“Have you tried talking to him about it?”

“He doesn’t listen!” Ominis groaned exasperated and tiredly rubbed his face. This entire thing with the journal really ate at him but you didn’t want to get caught in the crossfire between him and Sebastian. “His obsession with finding a cure is going to be…” Ominis stopped in the middle of the sentence and muttered under his breath,“Speak of the devil...”

You didn’t have to look up to know that Sebastian must be on his way towards the Slytherin table. No one could sneak up on Ominis, especially not Sebastian, whose footsteps and heartbeat he knew as well as his own. The freckled brunette slumped on the seat next to you, looking about as bad as you felt. Judging by the dark circles under his eyes he must have gotten about as much sleep as the both of you.

 “Sebastian! You look awful. How long did you stay up?”

“You’re one to talk. I know the two of you snuck out last night too. How was your date by the way?” he shot back, a taunting smile on his face. You laughed and gave him a cheeky wink.

“Don’t try to change the subject. We are worried about you,” Ominis chimed in, his voice sounding strained and tired.

“Look I don’t feel like being interrogated. Leave it alone. Seriously,” Sebastian groaned, unable to hide his annoyance. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, and prayed they would leave you out of it. Trying to diffuse the tension you dramatically collapsed on the table, burying your face in your crossed arms. “Merlin what I would do for a quick nap right now. Do you think Professor Binns would even notice if we missed class?”

“Nice try darling, but I am not risking detention for a nap,” Ominis sighed and let his fingers run through your hair. Surprised by this public display of affection Sebastian raised an eyebrow but remained silent. It must be odd for him to see his best friends dating, you thought to yourself. I hope he doesn’t feel left out.  “Says the one who falls asleep in class,” you replied teasingly and laughed when Ominis pretended to pout. Sebastian joined in and just like that the tension between the two was gone and they were back to being best friends.

“Watch out Ominis. Mc will lead you down a dangerous path. Sneaking around the castle at night, skipping class, soon you will join us on our little excursions in the Highlands.”

“You wish. I don’t even want to know what you two are up to when I’m not around.”

“Don’t worry I will take care of your sweetheart,” Sebastian grinned, earning an annoyed eyeroll from the both of you. Then he added, “I’m happy for you. Truly. You two deserve to be happy. Just keep the snogging at a minimum when I’m around, please.”

----------

You clutched your scarf, buried your nose in the soft fabric to protect it from the sharp wind so typical for the Highlands and hurried your steps. The path to Hogsmeade was usually filled with Hogwarts students, but to your luck the weather seemed to have scared off most of them. The sky was dark and hung with even darker clouds, and the wind tugged on your clothes mercilessly, no doubt the presage of a storm. You rushed past the shops on main street and made your way up to the town square where Sebastian already waited for you at the foot of the giant willow tree.

“Hope you didn’t have to wait too long,” you greeted him, still out of breath.

“Tell me again why we didn’t just meet at the three broomsticks?” your friend grumbled as he tried to keep his thick brown locks away from his face.

“It was your idea to meet here,” you protested but your friend gave you a playful nudge to signal that he was just messing around.

“Tell you what the first round of Butterbeer is on you and we are even,” he laughed.

Only minutes later the both of you warmed your hands on the warm mugs and inhaled the sweet scent of the liquid. The three broomsticks was relatively empty but you welcomed it. The things you and Sebastian usually discussed required a certain degree of privacy.

“So, tell me about your date,” Sebastian wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. He seemed to be in a good mood today.

“Didn’t Ominis already give you a play-by-play?”

The brunettes face darkened. “Not exactly.” Seems like I’ve hit a nerve. Of course, you had noticed that something between them had changed ever since the scriptorium. Usually, you tried to stay out of it, but today you felt like you had to ask. “What’s going on between the two of you?”

“The usual. We’re still having…a disagreement over the spellbook. I’m sure your beau must have told you all about it,” he scoffed, and his entire demeanor changed. Gone was the lighthearted mischief maker that you knew and loved. You had seen and felt his dark side several times, this irritable, angry and bitter version of him and knew arguing with him would be pointless but you had to try.

“He’s worried about you because he loves you, you know?”

“If he loved me, he would help me find a cure for Anne,” Sebastian spat, his voice cold as ice.

“Don’t be like that.”

“Of course, you take his side.”

“Now that we are courting you mean. That doesn't change anything for me. Our friendship is a separate thing, I’m just trying to understand what’s going on between the two of you,” you protested and fought the urge to roll your eyes. It was unfair of Sebastian to accuse you of taking sides, when you had always been there for him to help him execute whatever crazy plan he had come up with.

“Don’t. This is between Ominis and I. Now let’s talk about something else. You still haven’t told me how your date went,” he tried to diffuse the situation and gave you a tired smile. “But first, I’m going to get us something a little stronger.” You couldn’t help but smile too when you watched your friend work his charm and quick wit to convince Sirona to slip him two glasses of Firewhiskey.

On your way back to the castle you felt the alcohol taking effect, keeping you warm from the icy wind. Next to you, Sebastian swayed dangerously – he had had even more shots than you. We are going to be so hungover tomorrow. The way back to the castle felt endlessly long. This was made even worse by Sebastian who tried to lay down on the floor or run away from you every two minutes. You felt like a babysitter chasing after him and getting him to follow you. When you finally reached the castle, you decided to escort him to the dorms. Ominis welcomed you with raised eyebrows when he noticed the state his friend was in and together you dragged him into their room. After you had taken care of your friend, Ominis accompanied you back to the exit of the common room. “I take it you two had fun tonight. I’m going to have fun holding back his hair all night, judging by the condition he’s in.”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Of course not. I’m just tired,” he quickly reassured you and placed a quick kiss on your lips before he backed away and made a face. “That bad?” you giggled.

“Let’s just hope you don’t run into any professors.”

Still, he didn’t back away when you pulled him closer for another kiss. You buried your fingers in his hair and pressed your cold body against his warmth. He replied by deepening the kiss, his tongue starting to explore yours, as he tightened his grip on you. You enjoyed the way he shivered and gasped under your touch when you ran your hands down his spine. Then suddenly, the warmth was gone. Ominis had forced himself to pull away and left you longing for more. You looked at him, puzzled, and watched him catch his breath. Why did you stop? “We shouldn’t. Not here. Not like this,” he finally managed to get out and gestured at the room. You didn’t care. Ominis cupped your face and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“You know how much I want you. But this is not the time or place.” Pretending to pout you turned away from him, but you were too drunk to keep up your pretense and started giggling. 

“Go to bed, darling. Sleep it off. I have to go look after Sebastian,” Ominis murmured softly and stroked your cheek. “Are you going to make it back to your dorms safely?” The concern in his voice made your heart soar. It felt good, being loved this way. “I’ll be fine,” you reassured him and reached for his hand. He pulled you into a hug instead and you buried your face in his chest, listening to his heartbeat. “Goodnight, darling”, he whispered and placed another kiss on the top of your head.

As soon as you stepped through the doorway into the corridor someone grabbed your arm. “Ominis…,” you giggled and turned around. You froze when you were met by Marvolos piercing stare and instinctively took a step back.

“You know if you want to be with a Gaunt so badly, I would be the better option. I don’t get why you waste your time with my crippled brother. It’s not like he is going to inherit anything,” he sneered, his voice dripping with hatred and disgust.

Without hesitation you took a swing and punched him. Hard. A disgusting cracking sound echoed through the empty corridor, followed by a long silence. Finally, Marvolo looked up, a nasty smile on his lips, blood dripping from his broken nose. You suddenly became aware of how helpless you would be if he decided to fight you right now. Still half-sedated from the alcohol you were an easy target. You clutched your wand and waited for Marvolo to retaliate. Nothing happened. The only sound was the steady dripping of blood onto the stone floor. It made him look even more dangerous. Even though he was younger than you your instincts told you not to underestimate him. According to Ominis he took great pleasure in practicing the Unforgivables on other people. After a few more moments that felt like an eternity he simply turned around and vanished through the entrance of the common room. Your hands were shaking when you made your way back to your dorms. Whatever this was with Marvolo, you could feel that it was only the beginning.

-------

When you woke up in the morning your head was throbbing. You could only guess how Sebastian must be feeling.  Thinking about the events of last night you groaned, knowing that Ominis would not be amused when he found out what you had done to his brother, and you were not in the mood for conflict. Maybe I’ll just stay in my room all day. As much as you loved that plan you knew you had to go to the Room of Requirement to take care of all your rescued creatures. Highwing always got grumpy when he didn’t get his dinner on time, and you really didn’t want to deal with a grumpy Hippogriff.

You spent the entire morning feeding, grooming, and playing with your creatures, really taking your time. After that you tended to your plants and quickly brewed a few more healing potions for good measure. You even managed to get Deek to bring you a couple of sandwiches from the kitchens, so you didn’t have to go to the great hall for lunch. Just when you thought about taking Highwing out for a ride you heard someone enter the Room of Requirement. Ominis.

“I knew I’d find you here.”

You tried reading his face to figure out how to approach this, but he remained expressionless.  While you were thinking about what to say he continued, “You don’t need to hide from me. I heard what you did to Marvolo last night. What was that about?”

“I can handle your brother.”

Ominis furrowed his brows and moved closer. “What happened?” he asked softly. He didn’t seem angry at all, he seemed concerned. You let out a shaky breath and gently placed a hand on his forearm, “It was nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

“What did he say to you?” Ominis asked again, his milky gaze holding yours.

“He insulted you and I lost my temper. That’s what happened.”

For a long time, no one said anything. You would have done anything to know what was going on inside of Ominis’ head as you waited for his response. Was he angry at you? You thought about Marvolos disgusting grin and clenched your fists again. I’m not going to apologize for this, you thought grimly. Finally, Ominis spoke up.

“I think it’s best that we end this right now before you get hurt.”

It felt like someone had hit you in the face and you quicklypulled back your hand that was still resting on his arm. This reaction didn’t make any sense. It wasn’t even you who got hurt but Marvolo. If anything, this proved that you could look after yourself.

“Where is this coming from? I had a little disagreement with your brother and you want to break up?”

“They will come after you. It was stupid of me to think they would ever let me be happy,” he said, his voice shaking.

“Ominis, I’m not going anywhere,” you tried to reassure him, but he was starting to panic. His hands were shaking violently, and he kept cradling his head repeating the same thing over and over again. “They’re going to hurt you. And it will be my fault.”

Seeing him like this, you felt helpless. “I need you to calm down. Focus on my voice and breathe. Nothing is going to happen to me, alright? Your family won’t hurt me. It’s alright. Everything is alright,” you once again tried to talk him down, but it was no use. He seemed to be trapped inside of his own mind and you couldn’t get him out.

 “My thoughts are so loud. I can’t make them stop. It’s so loud. I need to make it stop,” he whispered, tears in his eyes. Now you were starting to panic as well. You had never seen him like this before and it scared you. What scared you even more was that you didn’t know how to help him.

“Stay here. I’ll go get Sebastian,” you said and hurried out of the room. You didn’t even bother searching for him in the Slytherin dorms and headed straight for the Undercroft. Sure enough, you found your friend, his nose buried in the old tome you had found in the Scriptorium.

“What’s wrong?” Sebastian asked when he saw your flushed face.

“Something is wrong with Ominis. I don’t know how to calm him down. He insists that his family is going to do something to me. He says he can’t make his thoughts stop,” you blurted out, stumbling over your words.

Sebastian nodded and closed his book. “I see. He gets like that sometimes. Bring me to him. I know what to do.”

-------

The sun was about to set when you made your way to the Slytherin dorms. A few minutes ago you had received an owl from Sebastian, that Ominis was better and wanted to talk to you. As you hurried down the corridors of Hogwarts you smiled to yourself. It was heartwarming the way these two took care of each other, despite being in a fight. The connection between them was more than friendship, it was brotherhood.

Ominis waited for you in front of the entrance to the common room. Before you could say anything he offered you his hand. “Care to accompany me for a walk?”  Even though you wanted nothing more than ask how he was and what had happened, you silently interlocked your fingers with his, giving him space. For a while you walked in silence, leaving the dungeons behind and passing the empty great hall. When Ominis lead you through the courtyard towards a little iron gate you finally understood where you were headed. The boathouse. Of course. On your way down the endless-seeming staircase Ominis finally started to speak.

“Sorry you had to see me like this.”

“There is no need to apologize. Do you want to tell me what happened?” you asked tentatively. The blonde took a shaky breath before answering and you squeezed his hand reassuringly.

“Sometimes I get these thoughts. They are not real, but they feel so real that I lose myself in them. It’s like they are screaming at me. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“What are they saying?”

“Usually my worst fears. Things I don’t want to happen,” he whispered and lowered his gaze, collapsing into himself. You had seen him like this before – at Gaunt Manor when his father had raised his voice at the dinner table. Seeing what his family had done to him made your blood boil, but you put your anger aside and asked softly, “That sounds awful. How can I help you when something like that happens?”

“I don’t know.”

“We’ll figure it out.”

“I’m sorry I’m making it so difficult. I wish I was easier to love.”

“Nothing about you is hard to love. In fact, loving you feels as easy as breathing. You don’t need to be ashamed of your scars. I know what I signed up for, and I haven’t changed my mind.”

Ominis still didn’t look at you, his empty gaze fixated on the dark water of the lake.  “You haven’t seen me at my worst yet. Believe it or not I’m actually keeping it together pretty well at the moment. That can change. And when it does, things get ugly. You don’t want to be around when that happens.”

You could feel him trying to pull away but you didn’t let him. “Stop. I’m perfectly able of making my own decisions. Try to push me away as much as you like, but I’m not going anywhere.”

#ominis gaunt #sebastian sallow #hogwarts legacy #ominis x reader #sebastian x ominis #ominis x mc #hogwarts legacy imagine #hogwarts legacy fanart #ominis gaunt headcanon #marvolo gaunt #hogwarts legacy sebastian #hogwarts legacy ominis #slytherin #whumptober 2023

[bellaxgiornata]

All These Years [Part 11: "Last to Know"]

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader

[You can find the full series summary and masterlist of installments for All These Years here.]

Warnings/tags: 18+ for this series; contains emotional hurt with no comfort until the final installments, angst, pining, friends to lovers, slowburn, and eventually smut

Word Count: 6.9k

a/n: This is another longer installment that brings us through season 3 (I'm planning a different angsty fic to really focus on season 3) and begins to bring us closer to the end of angst...but we're not quite there yet. Feedback is always appreciated!

Tag list: @acharliecoxedfan @theetherealbloom @rotscinema @magnumstyles @roseallisonparker @ofmusesandsecrets @readerhead @paracosmic-murdock @v4leoftears @why-always-me-gosh-please @redbircl @keepingitlokiiii @yarrystyleeza @mattkinsella @ms-murdockswift @margoo0 @1988-fiend @lockleywife @strangeobsessed @justalittlebitbored @am-3-thyst @buckybarnes-1917 @thora-jane @lionalsowrites @cloudroomblog @prince-tassel @danzer8705 @yourlocalbentspine @harperdoodle @hollandorks

Sitting across the table from Foggy and Karen, you drew your steaming latte to your lips for a drink. You were partially listening to Karen discuss the new article she was working on for the Bulletin, the newspaper she'd inevitably started working for shortly after Matt had disappeared and Foggy had disbanded their law firm. He had taken a job over at Hogarth, Chao, & Benowitz so he could continue to pay his bills, unable to continue to afford to work at Nelson and Murdock with the other half gone. You had recently thrown yourself into your own work over the last few weeks, gaining a new position with a pay raise and the ability to work from home for your company. Which had proven too convenient because you usually rolled right out of bed and stayed in your pajamas all day, showering after work just to throw on another pair of pajamas. 

It had been almost two weeks since you'd stopped going to Clinton Church now, too. You barely left your apartment anymore since you didn’t need to leave for work. Oftentimes you lost track of time and had been clocking in hours and hours of overtime at your computer. You’d had nothing else going on and you didn't want to think, so you’d found yourself hyperfocused on coding. Your boss had certainly been praising your initiative.

This morning was actually the first time you’d left your apartment in days. You hadn’t even left for groceries, having ordered them and had them delivered to your apartment a few days ago for convenience. Foggy and Karen had been worried about you, frequently telling you as much over texts lately. Which was why you'd eventually caved and met them for coffee this morning. But if you were being honest, you weren't mentally fully present with them. 

Your attention had shifted outside the window as Karen continued on with her animated conversation, Foggy just as enthusiastic as she was with whatever they’d been talking about. You’d unintentionally lost your focus as you often did outside of work lately, your eyes absently lingering on the place outside the window just above Karen’s shoulder. The sidewalk outside the coffee shop was busy with the usual Saturday morning foot traffic and you blankly watched as a multitude of colors swam by. You weren’t sure how long you’d sat staring out the window like that before you realized Karen was snapping her fingers in front of your face. Blinking a few times, you snapped out of your daze and focused back on her and Foggy. Worry was written clear across both of their faces as they stared back at you.

"What?" you asked.

"I was trying to ask you how you liked your new position," Karen said. "I asked you like four times now."

"Sorry, I uh, I was distracted," you replied, sitting up straighter in your chair as both of your hands wrapped around your warm coffee cup. "It's good. It's going good. Working at home is–is good."

Foggy leaned across the table towards you, concern still clear in his eyes. "Are you okay?" he asked gently. "Because you've been distant ever since…"

"I'm fine," you answered automatically, forcing a smile onto your face. 

Foggy and Karen turned and exchanged a look with each other for a moment, your eyes narrowing as you watched. The strained smile on your face was quickly growing uncomfortable. When Foggy focused back on you, he shook his head slowly. 

"No," he disagreed, "you're not. You haven't been fine for a long time. What's going on with you?"

"Nothing," you replied defensively. 

From across the table, Karen sent you a sympathetic look. You knew the one. You'd seen it plenty of times now. 

"It's because of what's been popping up in the news, isn't it?" she asked. "The little rumors."

Your head tilted to the side as you eyed her curiously. "What little rumors?" you asked back. 

Karen's gaze flickered to Foggy before it returned to you. Her fingers began drumming on her coffee cup nervously. 

"About the man in black?" she said, voice lowered. 

You sucked in a sharp breath, your back straightening further in the chair. Hope filled you instantly as your eyes searched Karen’s face for answers.

"Matt?" you whispered. 

She opened her mouth to speak but Foggy raised a hand, waving it firmly in the air between the pair of you. The gesture instantly cut her off before she'd even begun.

"It's not Matt," Foggy stated sharply. "Hell’s Kitchen has become ground zero for all kinds of copycat vigilantes lately. It's not him, so don't go giving her false hope, Karen."

Your eyes further narrowed at Foggy. "How do you know it's not him?" you challenged. 

Foggy’s expression softened, a hand running across his forehead. "Because," he answered softly, "if it was Matt, he'd have reached out. Told us he was alive. You know he would. It's been just over a couple of months now, he's had plenty of time to reach out to tell us he survived Midland Circle and he hasn't." He sighed deeply, shaking his head at you. "You need to accept it. He's gone."

"Foggy," Karen gently reprimanded, "that's not–"

"No," Foggy countered firmly, his focus shifting to Karen. "She needs to hear this. She needs to accept it and stop doing what she's been doing to herself! And whatever this bullshit in the news is–it's not Matt." Foggy’s attention returned to you, his eyes pleading. "You have to let this go. You need to accept the fact that Matt–” Foggy winced, “–he's dead.”

Your throat felt like it was closing up, tears welling in your eyes. How could Foggy just accept that as fact so easily? How could he just give up on Matt like that? He had been both of your best friends for so long. Wasn’t there any part of him that had hope?

“Foggy, that’s a little harsh,” Karen chastised. “You’re being really unsympathetic here.”

Foggy shook his head, once again rounding on Karen. “She’s been denying the facts for almost three months now!” he exclaimed. “And look at how she’s been doing! She’s clearly not handling it alright. It looks like she’s barely sleeping and taking care of herself. Every time we see her she’s barely present. And she’s been paying for his apartment for months now!” 

His head spun in your direction, startling you at the abruptness. Your lips were quivering as you sat there, feeling like you were about to break down in the middle of the coffee shop with everything he was saying. 

“You can't keep paying for his apartment and holding onto his things. It's not good for you," Foggy stated sharply. “It’s not sustainable for you to pay for two rents, either. You need to let this go!”

“Foggy–”

“ No !” Foggy growled at Karen. “I’ve already lost Matt, I’m not losing her, too!”

Sniffling loudly, you swiftly rose from the table and wiped the back of your hand across your tear stained cheeks. Both Foggy and Karen’s attention shifted to you instantly. Karen mouthed an apology as Foggy’s face fell beside her.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“Home,” you croaked out.

Ignoring Foggy’s pleas to stay, you quickly turned and left the coffee shop with your coffee clutched between both hands. You did your best to duck your head, trying to hide your face as you silently cried the entire walk back to your apartment. 

What a shitty past few days it had been. 

While Matt had been out last night, he'd been stopped in his tracks the moment he realized his hearing had fully come back to him. He could hear the sirens of ambulances approaching where he’d just stepped out onto the street, the sounds of the city around him, the buzz of a neon sign nearby, and the commotion in front of the hospital he’d just exited. He had been stunned, a wave of gratefulness washing over him in that very moment because he could fully hear again . But what were the first words he’d heard in the commotion around him when God had finally decided to restore his hearing?

The FBI had let Wilson Fisk out of prison.

Could God have been laughing at him any more than he already had been? What a fucking cruel joke to restore his hearing just in time for him to hear that Fisk had been released. Matt had been furious . Even more furious at God than he had been lately. But despite his rage since that moment, he knew there was something he needed to do tonight.

If Fisk was free from prison, in any capacity, he knew he’d be seeking revenge on himself, Foggy, and Karen for having put him away. And while Matt Murdock was safe from his vengeance because he was supposed to be dead, Foggy wasn’t. And neither was Karen.

Which was why Matt had donned his winter coat, the baseball cap, and some sunglasses before making the long trek to the bar he knew Foggy frequented near his new place of work outside of Hell’s Kitchen. Despite wanting to have his friends continue to think he was dead, knowing it was safer for them, Matt had admittedly kept tabs on Foggy on and off for weeks now. He didn't let himself ponder the reasoning, though.

But it had only been Foggy he’d checked in on. He couldn’t bring himself to see what you were getting up to. He’d known you’d stopped visiting Clinton Church not too long ago. The last few times you’d visited he’d heard you from the church basement. You would always end up softly sobbing to yourself before you left. And each time you had, Matt had curled up on the basement floor just beneath the pew you’d been sitting in, just to feel some semblance of being near you again, and he cried with you. When night had fallen those nights, he’d immediately gone out as the man in the mask and let the Devil take over, not wanting to feel anything. 

But he hadn’t gone anywhere near your apartment. He couldn’t bring himself to.

And now he was standing outside the bar Foggy was sitting inside at this exact moment. Matt could tell Foggy was upset by how much he’d already had to drink, having known the amount because he’d been standing outside in the alley from the moment Foggy had first showed up and stepped inside. He’d been struggling to get up the nerve to go inside and talk to him, to warn Foggy about staying away from Fisk and letting him deal with things. Because clearly the law wasn’t going to achieve anything on its own at keeping Fisk where he belonged, so it was up to Matt to make things right.  

He knew it wasn’t going to be easy going inside and talking to him, though. Just standing in the alley and knowing he was about to go in there and reveal to Foggy that he wasn’t dead, that he’d been lying and would need Foggy to yet again lie for him–to people both Matt and Foggy cared about– hurt . 

Matt needed to keep his distance to keep you all safe, though–now more than before. Fisk was dangerous, and he was certainly going to come after Foggy and Karen, so Matt needed to make sure both of them stayed out of Fisk’s way. He certainly didn’t need Karen to go chasing after him as the reporter she’d become and further put herself on Wilson Fisk’s radar. She didn’t need to end up like Ben Urich. And he didn’t want Foggy going after Blake Tower for signing off on the FBI’s decision to release Fisk for information–that would certainly garner Fisk’s attention.

But you–Fisk didn’t know about you. You weren’t a part of Nelson and Murdock. Fisk had no reason to know about you, which meant you needed to stay far away from Matt and the Devil so your name would never cross Fisk’s lips.

Which was why he could only go to Foggy. He knew he’d keep the secret in order to keep his friends safe, even if he would absolutely hate Matt for asking that of him. 

And he also needed to steal Foggy’s wallet for his New York State Bar Association license for what he planned to do tomorrow. 

With a sigh, he pushed off of the wall and forced himself to turn the corner and enter the bar. It wasn’t very busy for a Tuesday evening, so Matt easily made his way over near where Foggy was drinking at the counter. He paused when he was just a few feet behind him, nerves twisting in his gut. Foggy was entirely oblivious to Matt’s presence, though, still swirling the alcohol in his glass absently. Squaring his shoulders, Matt steeled himself for the emotional pain that he was about to inflict on both Foggy and himself.

“Fog,” he called out softly.

Matt heard the way Foggy’s head slowly turned towards him, his brows having drawn together in confusion. For a moment Foggy just stared at Matt in perplexed silence. Matt could practically hear the moment when Foggy realized who was standing before him in his slightly intoxicated state. 

“This isn’t real,” Foggy said. "You're not really here."

Matt’s teeth ground together as he gave a single nod at him. “It’s real,” he said softly.

He could hear the way Foggy’s lips drew into a big smile, the only one that had been on his face in the hour that Matt had been standing outside. The bar stool Foggy had been sitting in slid back on the floor as Matt heard Foggy rise to his feet just moments before he felt his friend embrace him in a tight hug. Instinctively Matt’s hands flew up, hugging Foggy in return. He could smell the salt of his unshed tears in the air.

“Hey, Fog,” he greeted quietly.

“How?” Foggy asked in disbelief, still clutching Matt tight. “Where? We thought you were dead!”

Foggy abruptly pulled away from Matt, clearly taking a moment to scan him over. Matt’s hands returned to his cane, fidgeting nervously with it as he practically felt Foggy’s eyes roving him. Seconds later, Foggy said your name and Matt’s heart felt like it shattered instantly. 

“Does she know you’re alive?" he asked. "Does Karen?” 

Pressing his lips tight together to keep from crying, Matt reached a hand out and gently grabbed Foggy’s shoulder.

“Take a seat, Fog,” he ordered.

Foggy did as directed, returning to the bar stool he’d just been seated at. Matt slowly lowered into a stool near him. He braced himself for what he was about to have to say and do now.

“I’m not back,” Matt told him firmly.

Matt heard the smile once again spread across Foggy’s face and the joking tone when he spoke next.

“Well I know I’m not drunk enough to be hallucinating quite yet,” Foggy teased.

Matt shook his head once. “I’m not back,” he repeated. “Matt Murdock isn’t going to be a part of me anymore. I’m…leaving him behind. He isn’t who I am.”

The smile quickly fell from Foggy’s face. “What?” he asked.

Swallowing hard, Matt tried to keep the waver and emotion out of his voice. “The only reason I came here was to warn you and Karen about Fisk now that he’s out. You’re both in danger.”

“Dude–”

“I’m going after him, Foggy,” Matt continued briskly, cutting him off. “I’m going to bring Fisk down. But I can only do that if I know that you and Karen are safe.”

“Hang on, hang on,” Foggy said, waving a hand. “I’m still trying to process the fact that you’re here. Alive .”

“I know that you and Karen are going to want to get involved,” Matt told him, his foot tapping lightly on the bar floor. He needed to get out of here soon before he lost his resolve. “To try to fight him in some way, but I’m telling you that I need you both to stay out of it and leave it to me.”

There was a brief pause after his words. Matt heard the way Foggy slowly shook his head in response. 

“No,” Foggy told him.

“No?” Matt asked in disbelief. 

“No,” Foggy replied more forcefully. “You don’t get to show up after months of me–all of us–thinking you’re dead, say something like that to me, and then just–just expect me to be cool with it. You’re my best friend , asshole!”

Matt’s heart tightened in his chest at the hurt in his best friend’s voice. Foggy’s words stung despite how much Matt knew he deserved them–truthfully he deserved a bigger verbal lashing. But he needed to end this and get out of here. Now.

“I was wrong to become your friend, Foggy,” Matt told him, ignoring the way his own heart beat irregularly at the lie as it left his lips. In time he'd make himself believe it. “I put you in danger and it was selfish of me. While I can’t change the past, I can stop making the same mistake. We’re done, buddy,” Matt said, quickly rising from the bar stool. “It’s over.”

“There’s something seriously wrong with you,” Foggy snapped, his voice cracking.

“Yeah, I know,” Matt agreed, once again fighting the emotion from creeping into his words. "Just stay clear of Fisk. Tell Karen to do the same," he ordered. "And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell her you saw me.”

Matt turned to go, desperate to get away and attempt to control his own emotions. He felt close to tears himself and was grateful for the sunglasses hiding his eyes. He managed two steps before he heard Foggy once again call your name after him. Matt winced at the sound of it, his feet inevitably coming to a stop as his back remained turned to Foggy.

“What about her, huh?” Foggy asked. “You know she’s been a mess since you’ve been gone? She refuses to believe you’re dead, Matt. Am I just supposed to let her continue thinking that now that I know it’s a lie?”

Behind the sunglasses, Matt’s eyes clamped shut. He felt a tear escape and he tried to hide wiping it away as he ran a hand over his mouth. Exhaling a shuddering breath, he tried to keep his voice steady when he answered.

“Yes,” Matt replied, voice softer. “She can’t know.”

“Are you fucking serious?” Foggy roared at his back. “You’re going to do that to her? Make me do that to her?”

Matt sighed, shaking his head but still refusing to turn around. “Fog, she can’t–”

“She’s paying your fucking rent, man,” Foggy spat bitterly. “For months now she’s been paying it. She thinks you’re still out there. Alive. That you’re too injured to find a way to reach out and that’s why it’s been months of us not hearing from you. But no,” he continued, anger clear in his voice, “you’ve been intentionally letting us think you’re dead all of this time.”

Matt couldn’t speak, his throat feeling like it was closing up on him. His hands gripped his cane even tighter. You were paying his rent?

“Why?” he managed, the word breaking.

“Why?” Foggy repeated in disbelief. “Because she cares about you, you idiot! She misses you! You’re one of her absolute best friends, man. She doesn’t want to believe you’re gone.”

Matt tried to swallow but his tongue felt thick and heavy in his own mouth, the gesture feeling near impossible. Fuck, he didn’t want to do this to you. He really didn’t. But he didn’t have a choice, he needed to keep you away from himself to keep you safe from Fisk. From whoever it was that came after Fisk if Matt survived this. It was for your own good.

“Tell her to stop paying for the rent,” Matt told him.

“ I have ,” Foggy ground out. “And you know what she did? She ran home crying and hasn’t answered my calls in days because of it.”

A grimace pulled at Matt’s face. Why were you holding on so tight to him like this? Why couldn’t you just let him go? He wasn’t that great of a friend. He was nothing special. Why couldn’t you just mourn him and move on?

“She–she can’t know,” Matt repeated. “She’ll find some way to get involved or Fisk will figure out she’s close to us and she’ll get hurt. Right now, Fisk doesn’t know who she is, Fog. She can’t know I’m alive.”

“So that’s it?” Foggy asked defeatedly. “I just continue to lie to her for you?”

Matt felt like he couldn’t stay here any longer, he could feel the dam holding his own emotions in check about to burst. He wanted to turn back around and embrace Fog, to apologize and tell him he was wrong for everything he’d done since Midland. He wanted to run to your apartment and beg your forgiveness on his knees for making you think he was dead. To feel you wrap him in your arms and tell him everything was okay and that you forgave him. 

But that couldn’t happen.

“I–I have to go,” Matt muttered.

Without further hesitation, Matt made his way out of the bar, ignoring the way Foggy was shouting his name after him. He hurried down the alley he’d initially been hiding in, pausing at the end of it when he didn’t hear Foggy pursuing him. 

Burying his face in his hands, he sank to the dirty ground and broke down in tears. 

Opening the door to Matt’s apartment, you stepped inside and were instantly hit with a chill. You shivered as you shut the door behind yourself before bending down and picking up the stack of mail that had been shoved under the door for this week. You frowned when you saw a few more overdue bills. Even with the raise you’d received, you were starting to really struggle under the weight of two rents and all of your own bills. 

With a sigh you made your way into the empty apartment, heading straight to the coffee table where you’d neatly organized Matt’s mail in separate piles. Taking a moment, you sorted the mail in your hands into the appropriate stack before you unbuttoned your coat. You slowly slipped it off of yourself before draping it over the arm of Matt’s leather couch. 

The emptiness of Matt’s apartment was only further making you feel the weight of loneliness you’d been experiencing lately, your eyes dancing across his sparsely decorated and overly spacious apartment as your eyes watered. Foggy and Karen had been avoiding you lately, always too busy with something to make time for you. They’d been acting strange for the past few weeks and you didn’t understand why. And it had only added to the hurt you'd been experiencing after everything with Matt.

Foggy had suddenly decided to run for District Attorney, which you’d been shocked about but excited for him nevertheless. But he was always claiming he had something to attend and he’d get back with you later. Karen had been saying she was busy with some story she was following, never having time to even chat on the phone. Though recently you'd heard she had been fired after the attack from a fake Daredevil killing people at the Bulletin–and that in itself had further confused you, but both of them had said it was something to do with Fisk and wouldn’t tell you anything more.

You’d been so lonely you’d finally called Adam back up and eventually gotten together with him for drinks last week. He’d been understanding all those months ago when you’d ended things because of Matt’s supposed passing, claiming you just couldn’t focus on a relationship after the unexpected loss of one of your closest friends. Though now it felt like Adam was all you had left.

And Matt’s apartment. Empty as it always was.

You stepped around the leather couch, your fingers running along the red plaid blanket neatly folded over the back of it as you walked. Stomach sinking as your grief once again hit you, you continued your usual tour of Matt’s place, the same as you did when you stopped in every week to collect his mail and check on the bills you needed to pay for him.

You always started in the living room first, pausing to appreciate the obnoxious billboard you’d grown fond of outside of the windows. Then you’d make your way into the kitchen, marveling at how little he actually had in there. Though you supposed it made sense that he hadn’t cooked much with what he spent his evenings doing. Eventually you’d make your way to his bedroom, pausing in the doorway and wondering what it would be like to be standing there in your pajamas in the morning, a cup of coffee in each hand. One for you and one for Matt. Imagining him waking up in his bed, his hair a ruffled mess and a sleepy smile on his face just for you as morning light seeped in through the windows.

Your heart twisted at the thought and you quickly pushed the mental image away, continuing on. You made your way to his closet where his suits were still all neatly hanging, fingers running along the braille tags on each hanger. With a heavy sigh, you turned to leave the room, but your eyes fell on Matt’s dresser. Coming to a stop, you paused as you eyed it for a moment. As if your feet were moving on their own, you made your way over, pulling open one of the drawers. A handful of neatly stacked, neutral colored shirts met your eyes. Fighting back the tears threatening to spill over, you ran a hand over a worn, dark gray tee-shirt on top. It was incredibly soft.

You didn’t know what it was that came over you, but you found yourself pulling the shirt out of his drawer and bringing it up to your nose. It still smelled like him–that clean detergent scent you loved. A choked noise fell out of you as you buried your face further in the material, wishing it was on Matt’s body and not just crumpled between your desperate fingers.

It was a few minutes before you'd managed to regain your composure and collect yourself. But as you closed his dresser drawer, you still held onto the worn tee-shirt in your hands. And even as you slipped your coat back on in the living room before exiting his apartment, locking it up behind you, you never parted with it. 

You'd spent so much time going back and forth on whether or not you would attend the mass for Father Lantom’s funeral this afternoon that you'd ended up showing up just as people were milling out of the church afterwards. You'd felt bad for having missed it, even if you'd only had a few conversations with him after Matt's memorial service before you'd stopped going to Clinton Church entirely. From your brief time with Father Lantom, and from what Matt had always said about him, he sounded like an amazing man. What had happened to him–whatever it was that had someone attacking a church –had been absolutely horrible. 

But you knew there was a wake being held at Foggy’s family's butcher shop nearby from the announcement you had read in the paper. You hadn't spoken to Foggy or Karen in almost a week now, but you figured you'd end up at least running into one of them there. As you neared the shop, you wondered if they'd continue to ignore you like they'd been doing for weeks now. 

Their silence had only opened a new wound for you, causing you even more pain in Matt's absence. You'd ended up growing closer to Adam over the weeks since they’d been avoiding you because of it, often spending a few evenings a week together. He didn't have answers for why your friends had been ghosting you and cutting you out of their life, but he at least offered the much needed comfort you'd been craving for months. 

Outside of Nelson's, you spotted a few people lingering on the sidewalk talking in small groups. They were dressed in all black and had clearly just come from the mass for Father Lantom at the church. You slipped around a group outside, offering a soft apology as you reached for the door handle beside them. Pulling it open, you stepped inside and immediately side-stepped out of the way of a couple who sent you friendly smiles. As your eyes scanned the busy shop around you, you eventually spotted Karen and Foggy at a table nearby with drinks in their hands laughing with–

Eyes going wide, you swore your heart entirely stopped beating in your chest. You couldn't breathe. Even your brain felt like it hit reset at the sight before you.

Foggy and Karen had been sitting at the table laughing and having drinks with Matt as if he hadn't been missing and believed dead for the past few months. 

Entirely frozen on the spot, all you could do for a moment was stare in shock at Matt laughing at something Karen had said. Mouth dropping open, you watched as all three of them raised their glasses as if in a toast before clinking them together. 

That's when the tears came. Watching all three of them sitting there as if they'd known Matt had been alive for longer than five minutes. As if they were celebrating something. 

And you'd been entirely left out of whatever it all was. 

Heart beating harder in your chest, a small, strangled whimper fell out of you. At the table, Matt's head immediately darted in your direction, the smile falling from his lips as his focus landed on you. Karen and Foggy’s attention soon turned towards you next, curious as to what had caught Matt's attention. Abruptly you turned and pushed the door to the shop open, hurrying out onto the sidewalk.

Throwing a hand over your mouth, you felt the tears steadily falling as you darted away from the building. You ignored the groups of people outside curiously eyeing you as your breath came in fast and sharp. Vaguely you heard Foggy calling your name as you briskly walked down the sidewalk and headed away from Nelson's. Your pace didn't slow as he continued to call after you.

Matt was alive.

Matt was alive .

You had been right. All this time and you'd been right. But why the hell had Karen and Foggy been so adamant about him being dead–wanting you to let him go–when they knew he wasn't? How long had they known and not told you? How long had they known and just continued to let you grieve? To let you keep paying for his apartment? To keep scouring the news about the man in the mask? They’d been telling you it wasn’t Matt despite you noticing the strange fake Daredevil in the news in relation to Fisk’s prison release. They’d made you feel like you’d been going crazy.

And why had Matt not let you know he was alive? Why had he let you continue on thinking he was dead but not Foggy and Karen?

Did you mean so little to him?

Foggy’s voice loudly shouting your name broke through your thoughts and you stopped, spinning on the spot towards him as your tears continued to fall. Foggy caught up to you quickly, his own face filled with guilt and shame. Behind him, you could see Karen escorting Matt, the pair of them rapidly nearing where you'd both come to a stop.

"How long?" you asked Foggy, voice cracking. "How long did you know?"

Foggy winced at the question, his face growing even more solemn. "A few weeks now," he answered softly. 

Your eyebrows rose up onto your forehead, eyes once again widening. Mouth opening and closing for a moment, you tried hard to search for words. 

"You–you knew?" you breathed out. "You knew for weeks? And you just didn't tell me he wasn't dead?" 

"I wanted to!" Foggy replied in a rush. "Believe me, I did! But it wasn't safe for you to know!"

"Are you–" you paused, pinching the bridge of your nose as a multitude of emotions fought to rise to the surface. Anger and relief were fighting at the forefront. "I don't fucking care if it wasn't safe!" you eventually roared at the three of them, Karen and Matt stopping beside Foggy now. "You let me think he was dead for weeks when you knew he wasn't! You both ignored me for weeks!" you yelled, fresh, hot tears rolling down your cheeks. "Left me to grieve the loss of Matt and my friendship with the both of you on top of it!"

"I–"

"No!" you raged at Foggy. "Do you know how much that fucking hurt? To feel like I’d lost all of you? And then I come here and see you all just laughing and having fucking drinks and I'm still in the dark about everything ?"

"We were going to tell you today!" Karen cut in quickly, her voice catching your attention. "We were dealing with Fisk’s release. That was why we knew Matt was back–and he had been a very closed off asshole, too, for the record,” she told you, Matt frowning deeper beside her. “But we were trying to keep Fisk from learning that you were connected to any of us. To keep you safe from him." 

"What?" you asked her.

"Fisk wanted revenge," Matt said.

Your eyes flew directly to him. His voice, after months of wondering if you'd ever hear it again, managed to slightly calm you. For a moment your eyes took in the sight of him standing there–something else you’d thought would never happen again. He was wearing one of his nice suits and his usual red glasses, which meant he must have stopped by his apartment at some point. The one you’d been paying the bills for him for. There were a few cuts bandaged along his face and his knuckles looked torn and bruised, but he was alive. 

He was alive.

“He tried to kill me when he realized I wasn’t dead,” Matt explained. “Tried even harder when he learned who I was. He was trying to go after Foggy, too–which was why he ran for the D.A. position, to make him more of a public figure. And he went after Karen.”

“The Bulletin?” you asked, eyes darting to Karen. “That was…?”

Karen nodded. “And what happened at Clinton,” she told you.

“It wasn’t safe,” Matt said, taking another step towards you. “I only told Foggy because I wanted him and Karen to let me handle Fisk. But he didn’t listen to me and told Karen.”

“Because she was in danger and needed to know,” Foggy snapped at Matt.

Matt’s mouth twitched at Foggy’s words but he didn’t respond to him. Instead he kept his focus on you as he spoke.

“But you weren’t a part of Nelson and Murdock,” he continued, shaking his head. “Fisk never knew who you were. I wanted to keep it that way. Initially I wanted to let you all think Matt Murdock had died so I could go out and be Daredevil without worrying about putting any of you in any more danger. But…” he trailed off, sighing as his shoulders dropped. “I couldn’t do it. I–I need you all. As my friends. To keep me from losing myself to that other part of myself.”

Wiping the heels of your palms over your cheeks, you tried to wipe away the tears. A few were still falling as you stood there. Admittedly you were still pissed–at all of them. Karen and Foggy for keeping his secret even if it was to keep you safe, and you were pissed at Matt for letting you spend months wondering if he was dead or not. 

“I’m sorry,” Matt said softly.

“I’m sorry, too,” Foggy added quickly. “I didn’t want to lie to you. I hated every second of it. You have to know that.”

Swallowing hard, your eyes flew over to Karen when she spoke up.

“I didn’t want to lie to you either,” she whispered, shaking her head. “I’m sorry, too. We really were going to tell you today. After Father Lantom’s wake. We just wanted to make sure the threat of Fisk had passed first.”

“This isn’t how I wanted you to find out,” Matt assured you.

Foggy’s arms raised, opening wide towards you as he shot you a hopeful look. “Can you forgive me, bestie?” he asked. “Hug it out?”

Chewing your lip, you took a step backwards. Collectively all three of their faces dropped at the gesture. Slowly, Foggy’s arms lowered to his sides.

“I just–just need a bit to process this,” you muttered. “I can try to understand why you did it but–but it still hurts.”

Both Foggy and Karen nodded, but between them, Matt’s frown somehow continued to deepen. Your eyes lingered on him for a moment longer, committing the sight of him alive and breathing to your memory before you turned and made your way back down the sidewalk. You wanted to go home and cry before you tried to make sense of all of this. It didn’t help that your body’s reaction was confusing you. You were overjoyed and grateful, but also incredibly pissed and deeply hurt. You wanted to scream at Matt but you also wanted to hug him and never let him go.

You’d barely made it a few steps before something had latched on to your wrist and you froze, head turning to glance down at what it was. Matt’s large and battered hand was encircling it firmly, clearly not about to let you go. Pressing your lips tight together, you tried hard to refrain from crying as your gaze slowly made its way up to his face.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry. After that building fell on me and I somehow still woke up alive…I’d lost almost all of my senses. I was in a dark place. And when my senses came back, Fisk had been released and I found myself in an even darker place.” He sent you a sad, apologetic smile. “I didn’t want to lie to you. Didn’t want you to keep believing I was dead. I swear I didn’t. It was just to keep you safe.” 

Your watery gaze tried to focus on Matt’s eyes behind the red lenses. You could feel the tears once again getting ready to spill over in your own eyes.

“I visited Clinton Church every day for weeks after you disappeared, Matt,” you admitted softly.

“I know,” he whispered, that sad smile still on his lips. “I was recovering in the church’s basement that whole time.”

You winced at his words. He’d known? He’d known you’d been there crying over him all this time? Day after day praying he’d come back to you? And he’d been there this whole time? Fresh hurt and anger burned in your veins, another wave of tears spilling out of you.

“You knew that too?” you breathed out. “You were right there and never said anything?”

He nodded slowly, shame and guilt written across his features. As the tears fell yet again, you finally gave in to the mix of emotions fighting inside of you to reach the surface. Your hand slipped out of Matt’s hold before you reached out and pushed against his chest roughly. For a moment he looked taken by surprise at the gesture, but his surprise quickly vanished as he stood there and allowed one of your fists to weakly slam onto his chest.

“Fuck you, Matt,” you cried out in a broken voice. “Fuck you for making me go through that knowing how hard it was on me.”

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, his own voice breaking.

Your fist slammed onto his chest again. “Fuck you for hurting me like that,” you continued. “For making Foggy and Karen hurt me like that.”

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

“How could you?” you wailed. “I thought I mattered to you!”

Matt’s hands were on your shoulders, gripping them firmly as he tried to pull you towards him. You tried to shake him off, struggling against his hold, but he only held on tighter as your fist slammed down onto his chest again, tears endlessly streaming from your eyes.

“You do matter,” he croaked out. “More than you know. You do matter.”

“Fuck you,” you sobbed, your fingers grasping onto the lapels of his suit coat. “Fuck you, Matt.”

Matt’s hands released their hold on you, his arms swiftly wrapping around your shoulders as he drew you into himself. You didn’t fight him this time, burying your face into his dress shirt and tie and letting yourself break down against him. Relief and heartache and love and anger all poured out of you simultaneously as you clung to him, your body shaking with your sobs. Matt had buried his face against the top of your head, clearly crying himself as he clung to you just as tight. You could feel his tears dampening your hair and hear the muffled sounds of his own choked sobs filling your ears. 

“Don’t ever do that to me again,” you begged, shaking your head against his chest. “Don’t make me go through that again.”

“I won’t,” he promised. “I won’t ever leave you again.”

[END NOTES]

I'm leaving end notes this time because I feel like they're needed (but if you read my fics over on AO3 I always give quite detailed end notes that I don't usually share on tumblr because it's just extra time I don't have trying to get two posts together).

So much happened in this installment though because we practically sprinted through season 3! This fic isn't meant to delve into that season though, but I wanted to include the angst of it in here (don't worry, I have another angsty fic planned for season 3 for another day). Reader was clearly struggling with the loss/absence of Matt for the months he'd been gone in this one. She was also the one paying for his apartment and his bills because she didn't believe he was dead. But she was also the last one to know he was alive--hence the title of this installment! And shit did that hurt when she didn't know why Foggy and Karen were pushing her away for weeks, which only led her back to the attractive vet tech, Adam (in case you didn't catch that). And then she didn't find out Matt was alive until she saw him at Father Lantom's wake at the Nelson's butcher shop. Despite being able to understand why they kept her in the dark, she's still pretty hurt and pissed. Especially at Matt. But clearly, Reader will never stop loving Matt.

I have a couple more angsty things up my sleeves that are getting closer to punching you in the gut next, so be prepared, friends! The angst isn't over even if the confession of feelings draws nearer... I currently don't have a title name to tease for the next installment yet either because this almost 7k beast of an installment took up all my brain space for two days, but I'll share a post about it when I do.

Feel free to scream at me now 🙃

#matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock angst #matt murdock #daredevil

[pillow-anime-talk]

17. “The princess shouldn’t wait, you know?” with Iori Suiseki from paradox live please?

# tags: scenario; current relationship; light romance; fluff; couple goals; soft!iori; adult!reader; mention of working in a restaurant; kisses; pet names; sfw

includes: female reader ft. iori suiseki {paradox live; akanyatsura}

author’s note: ooo! thank you!

17. “The princess shouldn’t wait, you know?”

It was definitely one of the warmest and at the same time one of the windiest days of August this year. You just finished your morning shift at the restaurant – you were working as a waitress in one of the smaller but very popular sushi bars in the city center. You liked your job, and your co-workers and bosses were really great people; they were helpful, the atmosphere between you was very family and the whole team was so well-coordinated that you often met privately, e.g. as part of one of your birthdays or even during the wedding of another waitress working with you on shift.

However, you were not currently near your workplace, quite the opposite. You took the subway a little bit of the city to get to the club that your partner, Iori, owned. It was lunch time and you wanted to take your loved one for a quick meal and then go home and fulfill your duties, e.g. cleaning the bathroom and kitchen, and then preparing supper for the two of you (you’ve been living together for almost a year and it was a really good decision that strengthened your relationship and love a lot). Iori will certainly stay after hours at his job, which is why a late dinner together was your daily must-have.

The wind started to blow a little stronger. You almost wished you’d brought a thin sweater or a lightweight hoodie today to numb the visible shivers down your both arms.

So you quickly took out your phone with a colorful case on it, searching for your boyfriend’s number with his nickname and a cute red heart emoji.

you; do you want to go to dinner with me? i'd love to eat korean bbq and tofu ramen...

You waited impatiently for a message from your boyfriend, but instead the dark-haired called you. You quickly answered the call, greeting him in a light tone of voice.

“... Honey, you should have texted me earlier that you were coming. I’ll try to be there as soon as possible, because I’m not at work at the moment. I went with the managers to one of the advertising companies... I’ll be there in less than half an hour, okay?” His voice was worried and a bit sad. He didn’t like to let you down, but lets be honest, it wasn’t his fault. You knew that and you didn’t blame him.

But still, you enjoyed teasing him.

“The princess shouldn’t wait, you know?” You said in a serious tone, holding back a laugh. You barely made it.

“But... baby...”

“Just kidding, Iori. I’ll wait for you at the pub and order us some food. Everything will be ready when you arrive. Sounds good? Don’t worry about it, really, it’s my fault that I didn’t tell you about my plans.”

“I should have written that I was going on business.” He admitted. “Zen should be in the building. Find him and ask him to drive you to this restaurant. You won’t be waiting for the bus... It looks like it’s going to rain soon. I don’t want you to get sick, my love.”

A slight smile appeared on your lips.

Korean BBQ is one thing and you really want some fried noodles, mushrooms and sweet corn, but the love your dearest partner gave you was definitely worth the wait and even better than a hot meal accompanied by music, the smell of tons of sweets and cool soda.

#—🎉 #quote prompts #prompts challenge #4k followers #4k special #prompt 17 #paradox live #paradox live scenarios #paradox live scenario #paradox live imagines #paradox live imagine #paradox live x reader #paradox live x you #paradox live x y/n #akanyatsura #akanyatsura scenarios #akanyatsura imagines #akanyatsura x reader #iori suiseki #iori suiseki scenarios #iori suiseki scenario #iori suiseki imagines #iori suiseki imagine #iori suiseki x reader #iori suiseki x you #iori suiseki x y/n