#i am this close to a mental breakdown

[introspectivememories]

#do you people read aoex with your eyes closed????? #if i see one more 'yukio is the worst brother ever!!!!' i'm going to go insane #he's literally 16 #like god forbid a child makes a mistake #god forbid a child breaks under the weight of expectations #like what do you even hate about him???? #the fact that he's mentally ill???? #that he's been in exorcist business longer than rin???? #'b-but he held a gun to rin's head' #he was literally going through a mental breakdown #i am going insane #i am the ultimate yukio defender #that's literally my son #i think youngest siblings should break down and go insane more often actually #aoex #ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #yukio okumura #okumura yukio

[the-stove-is-divorced]

Steven's halves in my fic! Plus some little notes about how they're characterized!

#both stevens are close to violence at all times #pinko is eager but steven 2.0 is more so a mental breakdown of unhinged #pinko: NO PEACE #steven 2.0 grinning at you like you didn't just catch him sobbing hysterically: what's up buckroo??? #not an art blog but once in a blue moon i am summoned to draw my blorbos #writing a continuation of steven 2.0's rn and cackling #i love him smmm #pinko will get his spotlight SOOON i promise i love my son #steven universe #steven universe future #steven universe fanart #steven universe fanfic #btw they miss each other SO BADLYYYYY #i cant wait till i bring them back together teehee! #my art <3 #pink steven #if u seen in any spelling errrors U DIDN'T

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

Completely bombed a quiz in one of my classes taking me down from a B to almost a D :)

#I am #so close to being done #I am so close to having a mental breakdown and dropping out #it’s not even fucking funny

[vvitchynerd]

Traditional art jumpscare🔪

Just finished sketchbook I started in Feb of last year, first and last pages

Unedited versions below:

#are my hands blue right now? yes #did i spend 4+ hours on this? yes #does my hand hurt? very much #I was feeling funky so i decided to draw newly creted moon deity as last page #also don't ask for sketchbook content i just sketch silly shit there and decribe my mental breakdowns #artists on tumblr #my art #original character #my ocs #art #traditional art #I'm bad at traditional art okay #also can you tell my violet ballpoint pen died for this along with blue one #moon's eyes seem so wrong when they're closed but they kinda should be like that #also first one is Varu i drew after mental breakdown from trying to work in call center #i am talking-on-the-phone phobic i will absolutely cry if i have to do it #don't question how Varu's hair works in any of my artworks his local nickname is rapunzel #by local i mean nobody calls him that but me #the improvement is cheek reduction surgery literally

[beevean]

you know what they say when you are sad

it's the perfect time to put the blorbos through the same Horrors as you are in 🥰 worse, even 🥰 it cleanses the soul 💖

#me glancing at grip chapter 3 as i am close to the part where hector and isaac divorce and hector has a mental breakdown: :)

[rin-yellow]

Something possessed me to make this and I have no idea why. I am so sorry

#rita kanisuka #ohsama sentai kingohger #king ohger #super sentai #robespierre #french revolution #iron widow lmao #maximilien robespierre #I'm an art blog but #actually I'm not this was supposed to be a blog for book reviews and then I had a mental breakdown #I'm not actually sure what I am #I guess I'm posting memes and shitposts now #you have no clue how close I am to converting this into a fanblog for idk super sentai or even something like fucking M3 #do y'all even remember M3? That one anime from 2014 #I'm not even sure if anyone has talked about it since the final episode aired but I recently watched it and it has stuck with me #where was i going with this #whatever I apologize for these tags #sunk cost fallacy dictates I post it like this #oh right forgot a few tags #papillon ohger #french revolution shitposts #super sentai shitposts #yea thats pretty much it #sorry for having a mental breakdown in the tags #I just failed a physics exam yesterday and am reconsidering my decision to study engineering lol #I know that's tmi but ehhhhh #yeah idfk lmao this is chaos but I'm sticking with this #and send post

[recurring-polynya]

Me, a person who has struggled to get up to 3k words per week for all of 2023: Oh, hey, it's almost November. What if I just pulled a NaNoWriMo and wrote 50k words. Then my fanfic would be nearly done.

#writing #love 2 keep painstaking records so that i am fully aware of my own abilities and constantly overestimate them anyway #why am i like this #i did nano once and it was very stupid #in the sense that i got the 50k out no problemo i think i even finished early #and it was not even close to a complete story and it wasn't very good and when i finished i closed the document and never opened it again #i mean. 50k is not a novel. it simply is not. it's a weird and arbitrary goal that means nothing #i mean. i am super good at achieving weird and arbitrary goals that mean nothing. i was so so so good at being in school #i just have to be careful of such things actually because i will waste all of my energy on them for absolutely no payoff whatsoever #it really would be super cool to write 50k words on my fanfic in november and also have a mental breakdown probs

[alligaytorswamp]

Im kind of feeling like i can't take it anymore

#vent #bad sad sleep-deprived and mentally ill #i am currently crying myself to sleep just fucking sobbing because everything hurts #my brain is failing me my body us failing me #i dont know what to do with myself #so many things are happening so many things hurt and i have no body to talk to #i have never felt so utterly alone #i hate myself for even writing this because i feel so pathetic and as if im just whining for attention #because i probably am #some lame ass cry for help because i really don't know how to function at this point #truly i am just so fucking alone #and there is just so much that is happening and i cant share it with anyone so it just all stays in my stupid brain and #probably makes me more mentally ill or smth #and for however long all i do is keep myself from crying during the day bc i cant let my family catch me having mental breakdowns #yet i have all of these painful thoughts that are plaguing my mind all the fucking time #i am just so so tired #and i keep thinking about death and it's so fucking scary #i just wish i wasn't myself and i had a different brain i could be better than this because maybe then i would be fine #at home im in toxic hell #in online spaces i have no one actually close to me #in my brain i have horrible thoughts and hardcore daydreaming distactions that dont fix anything #in my course i think im not doing well enough and im scare dthat my the end of it im still going to be a useless unemployed moron #on my silly blog i think if i dont make content i have no value and ehatever i make is not even that good or interesting #so i better cover it up with quantity but i dont have time or ability to do so #which again makes me into a fucking Nothing #god my head hurts so much #that's what u get for wailing at 4 am #anyways i am doing horrible and i can't take it anymore truly reaching my fucking limit #all my fault tho so ☺ #delete later and if someone actually reads it Um sorry for this i am hashtag unwell 😋💫

[mystery-star]

Here goes my "a week without mental breakdowns" streak.

Aka the week in which my sister was on vacation. Now just the thoguht of her being back brought me to the Edge of one.

👏👏👏

(Don't get me wrong tho, I love my sis and she doesn't do the stuff on purpose but STILL)

#tw mental health #tw breakdown #i mean i too dos stuff that triggers her #but that's stuff I can't really change #but when i ask her for ONE (1) tiny thing she CAN change #nope doesn't happen #and when she tells me to stop something I go extra miles to avoid her hearing me do it #but now i am tempted to just simnply not do that anymore until she's learned to close that frigging door corretly #now that also her boyfriend will come who closes the door (jsut hers the one i HATE being closed without pressing the handle down) the same #means twice as much noises #AND she will unpack her suitcase #and bc her bf is here she'll close her roomdoor for that #aka i can look forward to her opening and closing the time again and again and again and over and over and over again and again #I know I could ask her to PLS close it normaly #but last time i did... #she only told me what stuff I do that annoys her #I Changed mine #she didn't #so yeah #don't want another lecture of her telling me that the thigns I love to do (aka writing) disturb her #(my mom^s keyboard is exaclty the same. it sounds the same. but that is okay for her) #she has a problem with me chewing. BUT can lean agianst her boyfriend while he chews #and sorry that boy chews Way louder than I do #sometimes i feel like her misphonia s selective #mehh

[ghostofasecretary]

feeling very down! annoyed about it! i had a good day!! i am upset that my brain went on a 45 minute long spiral about how bad my last job went and also how bad All My Trauma Ever has been and also how my life is a mess! i am trying to get out of that pit but it's not going great! graaaaargh!!

#bad brains blogging #ghost speaks #can't i just. chill out #please for. like. one second #should i just try to sleep?? it's too early to sleep well tho #and i am shaking a lil bit with nervous energy #(rhetorical question don't answer) #grsasmxdkxmfkccnndmaARGH #self pity is a losing game but that doesn't stop me from playing!! #i want. for people to validate how bad it was. and for people to call me crazy and stupid and still be sad for me. no i do not want that on #i just. feel crazy and stupid and sorry for myself and it's not great i miss feeling cool and productive and helpful and funny and lovely #and no one can feel that way all the time but this. current bout of feelings. Sure Was More Memories Than I Wanted!!! #what would it be like to not have ptsd #i got--close to recovery/very few symptoms but also at that time i was getting set up for New Trauma 2.0 #and then transitioned straight from barely processing 2.0 to just. uh. trauma 3.0 you did it to yourself version #feels!! real bad!!!! #okay either go watch tv or go to bed stop having a mental breakdown in the tags

[insaneillusionist]

I love searching for mental illness tags I can pin on myself so I can fix what's wrong with me like a little checklist.

Anyway if anyone tries to suggest I might have a specific mental illness unless I ask for you to tell me, I will most likely block you or ignore that. This is one of the few boundaries I am forming, and it is a hard one.

#my random stuff #delete later #It really worsened my already bad mental breakdown and I am so close to snapping again #So fuck off cuz I know I'm broken and I don't need you to pretend there's a cure #Or that you think you know me #And I will most certainly lose it if you say “oh you have this probably” and then when I ask why say absolutely jack fucking shit #I am so fucking tired of that #And especially of oh we need more info maybe do that and then i give info and it's triggering #yes i am vaguing at this point #like yes i get it hurts and honestly i probably shouldn't have said such things in main chat tbf i didn't know they'd trigger ppl and I was #'t told but I do really have no excuse #But I am still pissed off #Anyway tell me that you think I have a certain mental illness and i'll fucking rip you to shreds #end rant i guess whatever

[widevibratobitch]

frustrated as all fuck but cant do shit about it because mom is grieving and i dont wanna add to it by being a bitch

#fine ill eat that fucking sandwich you made when i specifically told you i dont want to eat now. #ill spend the rest of the day hating myself for it but whatever makes you happy queen :)))))))))))))))))))) #fine ill let you drive me home instead of taking the train and getting a few hours of peace and time for myself. #ill lose my fucking mind but whatever makes you happy queen #fine ill call off the meeting with my dad and his gf on saturday morning like i planned. since you're staying over. its fine. #no fr tho. everything is fine. but eating that fucking sandwich after another of my ed related mental breakdowns is gonna kill me #i can feel my throat closing im gonna throw up fr #also i told her i need to be home BEFORE 1 pm. i had a train at 9. i would have been home by now. #and now it's 11 am and we havent even left yet. but i cant be mad about that either. cant be mad about anything ever. #therapy on wednesday therapy on wednesday therapy on wednesday save me save me save me save me save me

[bellerintwo]

i love martin i love him so much my heart hurts i’m going to be sick

#🩷💕💞💓💗💖💘💝🩷💕💞💓💗💖💘💝🩷💕💞💓💗💖💘💝 #here i am once again a close to 4 am mental breakdown 😭😭😭 #I JUST LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!! #i can’t sleep i just keep going through the photos from the match and my heart swells it’s just !!!!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! #i hope u guys are enjoying whatever time of day it is for u i love u all thanks for being friends with me !!!!!!!!!

[femmelated]

who came up with capitalism im gonna beat their ass!!!!!!!!

#seriously im THIS close to a mental breakdown #i come home from my 9-5 abd work another 8 hours just sobbing #i am so tired i dont even have energy to cook #dont worry im balancing out all tge energy drinks with powerades #mine

[missrosegold]

I need to stop looking at MHA leaks before I go to bed beacuse I always end up having an existential crisis over Dabi my beloved and never actually sleep as a result.

#touya will be fine #i keep telling myself that #i am this close to having a breakdown #i am mentally unwell #i just need him to live

[stonedopossums]

starting to panic abt the move. im under so much stress.

#.txt #its been coming for years. weve been planning it for years. but now its 4 months away and its reslly starting to set in #being in wa feels right. when we went in oct it was the most 'right' ive felt in years. #seeing the mountain felt right. being in the rainforest felt right. i felt like i was exactly where i was supposed to be for the first time #since i was a kid. i know this will be good for me. i just dont know how im going to handle such a big task. #i was 12 when we moved to mn so i didnt have to deal with any of the moving process besides packing my room #so this is really big for me and its super overwhelming and i just want to shut down #but i CANT #its such a huge mental task and i know its going to be super stressful but i dont have the capacity to fully actualize everything until its #really happening. i need to talk to a therapist i need someone else to make sense of all the shit going on right now #i need someone to just take the fucking wheel for ONCE and tell me everything is going to be okay but so far every single adult in my life #who ive talked to is telling me its a stupid idea and we wont make it and its going to fail #i need someone on my side for ONE MINUTE #for the love of god can i please just have an actual support system for five minutes #can someone please just actually fucking support me for once instead of talking bad about every fucking decision ive made in my adult life #can someone please just fucking be my parent for once. i want my mom. i want my mom to tell me everything is going to be okay. #vent #vent in tags #i am so close to a breakdown but i cant fucking afford one. this cant happen rigjt now i need to hold it together for a little bit longer. #just a little bit longer