#i am not even a lesbian huh

[hofudlaus]

GABRIEL AGRESTE DANCE NUMBER?????

#also i Fucking Knew he was giving him the allience to then make an even stronger akuma... man really can do Nothing right huh... #also fucking?? alya bi/lesbian awakening??? lesbian zoe(obviously) #gay flirting On screen????? #yes i am finally watching the stuff thats out in order thank u tizzy for the info on whats been going on air time wise #rambles #ladyliveblogging #i guess???

[casiavium]

All of these "who has more anything gender!" polls are just. white man without extreme body builder muscles v white man without extreme body builder muscles. The gender is "masculine" stop pretending it's universal

#even worse is when it's 'tradionally feminine' v 'traditionally masculine (without super ripped muscles' and the notes are all #she's the opposite of gender he's THE only gender ever. #'gender' isn't even androgynous anymore it's just some guy #vent post #idk I'm just kind of 😬 about people not seeing binary girl or even predominantly feminine as 'gender' whatever the fuck that means #you like androgyny when it's on twinks but don't think the butch lesbian that only calls herself a woman is 'gender' huh #and something about genderfluid characters only ever being accepted when they're in their 'not cis' presentation (cough ze l da) #like..i consider myself genderfluid and sometimes have guy-adjacent euphoria days #(still think about everyone who he/hims me when I cosplay Link ❤️) #but... I get just as much when I'm wearing what's 'expected' of me like skirts and dresses and makeup and am seen as a girl #because a lot of times growing up i wasn't really included in the girl stuff but was still too girl for the boy things :/ #and I feel like. everything focuses on the andro of androgynous that they forget androgynous doesn't mean vaguely fem guy #it's like. shiek is winning the gender poll. but zelda wouldn't. even though they're the same person and one doesn't exist without the other #nonbinary but the binary isn't girl-boy it's trans-cis #nice dichotomy idiot #what lies outside of it

[aheathen-conceivably]

without spoiling anything, will valcita be in the 1930s version or was she just an au character? i miss her. masc women on simblr are a fucking blessing. -different lesbian anon

You get a GIF different lesbian anon and only a GIF. Make of it what you will 👀

#y’all ain’t even waiting around huh #Zelda still in her wedding dress nobody even seen the house yet #but we already out here looking into our potentially lesbian future 🫡 #don’t blame y’all one damn bit Val is a treasure to the eyes and a perfect foil to Jo #what drama her presence could bring #hmmm hmm hmmm 🤔 #gif warning #Nonny reacts #and please know I am much blessed to have multiple lesbian anons love yallllll 🥰

[gayvampyr]

if you’re still discoursing about asexuals idk what to tell you. you’re a loser

#get over it #‘ah someone wants to call themself queer!!’ ok. cry #this may come as a shock but if you’re not attracted to the opposite gender you’re by definition not straight and therefore queer. it really #isn’t that hard to understand #i didn’t get called ‘queer’ and ‘dyke’ in school just so y’all could say im pretending to face queerphobia and oppression #so yeah log off and touch grass babes #aphobia #like i don’t understand how some of y’all can understand that a large part of lesbophobia comes from our unattraction to men and then in the #same breath say that asexuals aren’t oppressed for not liking the opposite gender. like the math ain’t mathin #you go from ‘cishets hate lesbians because they reject men!’ to ‘cishets are totally chill with aces even though they don’t like men’ #huh #and before anyone makes a fool of themselves in my notes i want it to be known that i am in fact a lesbo

[airbenderedacted]

deathstar shippers stop going out of ur way to tell me you hate dominator being a lesbian and that you’re homophobic asf challenge (impossible, apparently)

#(cw: put under a read more for homophobia & transphobia 😬) #LITERALLY went ''lemme say the quiet part out loud'' BRO THIS IS LIKE THE 6TH(????) TIME I'VE HAD SUCH AN ENCOUNTER #except i will say that this is the first time it wasn't unprovoked. i did @ them first to ask why they were leaving replies on my posts- #-saying hater's crush on dominator is creepy bc they 'look like they have an age gap' meanwhile they've liked AND MADE #-comments elsewhere shipping her with men that are way WAY older than her and sometimes visibly so like. hater and her are the same agegroup #so i was like. what is going on here huh??? ANFD THEN THEY JUST SAY THIS SHIT why am i ever surprised anymore lmao #shout out to this person for adding transphobia to their shittiness for Spice ig /s 🙄 eugh... #i should've seen it coming bc they were referencing a page on the woy wiki THAT USES STEVENSON'S CORRECT NAME & PRONOUNDS #AND YET THEY WERE ADAMANT ON USING HIS DEADNAME AND SHE/HER PRONOUNS LIKE.. I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED THIS I SHOULD'VE EXPECTED THIS but still 🤢 #i dont ever wanna stop giving ppl the benefit of the doubt but oh my god do These people test me. every time. goes like this Every Single T- #on god only like twice or smthn have i seen [REDACTED] shippers be like.. very decent to me and literally just ignorant #and they were from here and i just ask them to not interact bc it makes me uncomfortable and they're like i dont get it but ofc #and i never see them again #AND THEN EVERY OTHER PERSON WHO IS INTO THIS SHIT I HAVE *EVER* COME ACROSS #FUCKING JUST... JUMPS INTO MY MENTIONS OUT OF NOWHERE. LITERALLY I DONT EVEN?? DO ANYTHING I DONT GO NEAR THEM BRO #THEY FUCKING SNIFF ME OUT OR SOME SHIT FOR HAVING A DNI ON OTHER SITES AND GO #''OH SO YOU THINK I'M WRONG FOR HAVING TO REIMAGINE GAY/LESBIAN CHARACTERS AS STRAIGHT SO I CAN ENJOY THEM?'' LIKE- WTF? YES? IT IS #also i kid you not this is an actual thing someone has gone out of their way to look me up and yell at me over for like an hour straiught #on twitter. it was unhinged. like they were convinced straight ppl are oppressed any time gay characters exist #bc gay characters existing makes them unlikable and unrelatable and unconsumable to straights like damn ok if u feel that way die abt it? #it's just so unhinged like bruh GO AWAY LMAO??? SHUT UP! I DONT CARE LITERALLY JUST KEEP UR FREAK BIGOT SHIT TO URSELF GET OUT #again that specifically doesn't apply to this person who technically WAS @ by me first bc i was like.. hey... hey what's going on here HUH #but oh my god they turn out to be vocally homophobic every single time. i was always hoping i was like... #over generalizing these people as being fucking homophobic just bc 1) the vibes r always like that 2) it's faster to say #BUT OH MY GOD THEY REALLY ARE HOMOPHOBIC AS A WHOLE WHAT THE FUCK I LITERALLY ALWAYS WENT OUT OF THE WAY TO BE LIKE aint no way ahah BUT NO? #BRO???? GET OUT OF HERE THIS SHOW IS NOT FOR YOU Y'ALL ARE CREEPS #THEY FEEL SO EMBOLDED TO SAY THE QUIET PART OUT LOUD EVERY SINGLE TIME WITHOUT PROMPTING. I ALWAYS MAKE FUCKING SURE TO NOT ACCUSE BIGOTRY #AT MOST I'LL JUST BE LIKE yeah so straightwashing is a thing that's homophobic so don't do that IF ANYTHING. I NEVER CALL THE PERSON THAT #AND EVERY TIMEEEE THEY JUST GO MASK OFF WITH ''BTW I DONT LIKE THE GAYS'' I OEIUFKGEJRHGUKJDFS EVERY TIME EVERY TIME WTFFFFF #usually being right about things is epic. not this THIS IS JUST.. GWORLS WHAT HE FUCK

[marshmallowloves]

Self ship struggle #5379/????

Male F/O that I, a woman, self-ship with: *is ambiguous in his sexuality, never explicitly written to be romantically interested in anyone, but does explicitly care for his male friend(s)*

Creators/Official page for his source: *posts art where his male friend is hugging him and saying "I love you"*

The replies: "YOUR HONOR THEY ARE GAY!!! THERE IS NO STRAIGHT EXPLANATION FOR THIS!!! ALL THE COMMENTERS SAYING OTHERWISE ARE JUST NASTY M/M HATING FUCKBOYS!!!"

Me: *cannot even breathe in the direction of the post because if I do I will inevitably be labeled as disgustingly homophobic*

#I CANNOT stress this enough #I am F I N E with m/m ships!! I like all ships the same! #the problem I have is when people not only INSIST that their personal headcanon is OBJECTIVELY CORRECT #despite the intentional ambiguity of the source material #but then proceed to blatantly SCORN anyone who even mildly or civilly disagrees with them #two male characters established as friends give each other a gift? maybe even on Valentine's? #a holiday meant for showing love of any kind in general to those you care for? #PFFF there's no such thing as actual friendship! friendship is just the precursor to desiring each other CARNALLY! #only people who are romantically or sexually involved with each other do things like hug or give a present or *gasp* say I love you! #oh those two girls are holding hands while they walk? #they are OBVIOUSLY lesbians and are dating! #huh?? bisexual?? oh uh yeah sure whatever I guess. maybe. i dunno #oh they just like non-romantic contact with people? or are nervous and like holding anyone's hand? #LMAO no way gtfo with that het shit. why would the creators draw them holding hands if they aren't MADLY in love with each other??? #like do people genuinely forget that platonic love exists? or that any other sexualities exist? #why is it such a crime to interpret a character in more than one (1) single way #when they're purposefully written in an ambiguous way #or otherwise not established to be one specific way? #sorry for the rant. i don't think i'll ever not be salty about this

[starsandthorn]

sumeru archon quest got me fucked up

#personal stuff #thorn plays genshin #augh. ..... #god whenever a story throws a ''you will be forgotten by those who love you/the entire world'' #i am just fucking. in tears. every time. doesnt matter who it is #its just gut wrenching. the idea that not even your memory is allowed to be preserved #part of why elysian realm hit so hard with the passing on memories thing #anyway. im not the biggest scaramouche fan but the end scene with him hurted. like. yea :( #every interaction w dottore is so funny like he'll say anything abt science and im like yea that makes sense #and everyone else in the scene is like god what a madman.....it's impossible to understand or relate to hin #and im like Huh #ahshdkgk but yea the pacing of the archon quests has been so nice. i loved the saving kusani quest and the leadup to the fight #the boss fight was not as bad as i thought? like i havent actually tried the domain but it didnt feel as scary as the raiden one #BUT JESUS CHRIST DOTTORE DESTROYING HIS CLONES. UHH #like good god. the lines of them dying............................................... #THE CHILD'S VOICE LIKE HELLO? #AUGH. #anyway. #on a lighter note. dehya and dunyarzad yaaay :]] i love them. lesbians #dehya agreeing to take her to the desert waaa. hope we see them again later when her banner comes around <3

[the-lovely-dori]

Hey chat how do you tell a girl that the kiss you shared the other night has been on your mind basically nonstop and every time you think about it you get blushy and flustered and have to stop yourself from grinning or giggling to yourself like an idiot because someone around will ask what has you grinning/giggling like that and you either become a coward and lie or tell the truth: that a 2-3 second chaste kiss from your literal actual girlfriend that you are dating has you in shambles—in a good way, mind you.

And don’t even get me STARTED on the hand kisses. I am but a weak bisexual elfgirl with the soul of a stately Victorian maiden trying to be Very Cool and Proper about her lover’s sweet kiss—or perhaps a Middle Ages-era woman absolutely losing her mind over a kiss on the hand who ties her handkerchief to the Knight she’s swooning after’s lance at the jousting tournament.

GAHHH. Anyway. I’m very cool and collected about it, for sure. (Me when I lie)

#it’s hopeless lesbian pining hours everybody #I haven’t even gotten to all the sweet things my boys are up to #I really am a hopeless romantic huh #my posts

[futchmemes]

i keep having dreams where i date or marry a man and i don’t really know what to feel about it

#personal #like im happy about it in the dream #it’s never a situation where it’s forced #I even am like ‘huh i guess i’m not a lesbian after all’ in a lot of them #and I’m struggling to tell if it’s just like sublimated internalized lesbophobia or if my subconscious is trying to tell me something

[inkskinned]

it isn't really complicated, but i still can't tell my grandma about it. my girlfriend is also my boyfriend and i'm her girlboyfriend and there are a lot of days this feels like smoothing sheets over a good mattress. it feels like getting a cup of good hot chocolate. we paint our nails lesbian flag pink, and i watch her eyelashes make shadows on her cheeks. she wants to kiss me because i am really good at baking, and i want to kiss her because when i am freaked out about how i spilled coffee, she just hands me extra napkins and helps me clean. he is so handsome i want to eat my fist. they once just winked at me and i couldn't talk for like the next fifteen minutes.

i haven't seen the L word and i was raised catholic. my earliest experiences with queer relationships were through harrowing conversations and hushed questions and blood on the ground. i didn't like boys soon enough. what, are you gay? asked to a 6th grader, almost like a demand.

when she is asleep next to me and i can feel the dreams run up and down her body, i pretend we are both somewhere in the stars. i like to picture a future full of fruit trees, and writing him poetry. sometimes she wakes up, has a whole conversation with me, goes back to sleep, and utterly forgets that we ever even spoke. she is always kind to me, even in that liminal half-there ghost. i like the croaked, raw way her voice sounds in the very-early morning, the way she always seems surprised i'm still here, and home.

on the internet, there are a lot of people who would be annoyed by both of us, and how labels must be pruned into orchids. a box has to hold and define the insides. people must be organized.

we went on a date last night, and the host said, oh, table for 2 nice ladies? neither of us are ladies, but also we are very much 2 nice ladies. i have been wearing her sweater nonstop. he has frequently been forced into wearing my taylor swift official merch quarter-zip because i was worried about him catching a chill, and you simply cannot be cool in an official taylor swift quarter-zip. do not worry: they listen to better music than i do, and their voice sounds like leaves falling.

i wear the skirts and makeup and i am better with spackle and know how to drive stick. recently someone commented on my work - you're just a man trying to reappropriate lesbian spaces. sometimes i feel like she is a clementine to me, and sometimes i feel like he is a german shepherd and sometimes i feel they are a bird. i like watching his hands over a guitar. can i write this poem, even? how can you be a lesbian if you're sometimes with a man? or you are the man?

how can i, huh. you know, our first date lasted 3 days. we'd been flirting for over a year before i finally asked her out. i'd already written her into poetry. she'd already written me into songs.

last night, in the late night, when they woke up again, confused about where they were, they said - oh, thank god. this is your arm. there's just something so precious to me about the specifics, the denotation that the arm was (thank god!) mine. i really liked that definition. i liked the obvious relief because i understand it.

i say yeah, i have a partner. i mean - oh. thank god. it's your arm.

#writeblr #warm up #on gender politics lol #inkskinned try not to have feelings for someone challenge #time of death: they put my earring in their ear. they were wearing an unbuttoned black buttondown and a necklace with my name on it #you can just send me the coffin i was ready to crawl in

[midniiights-garden]

Mizu realising she's in love/a lesbian [Headcanons!!]

(A/N: I feel like this is like... already a given but please remember that these are HEADCANONS!! She does not have a canon sexuality. And I know it's mostly the lesbians who haven taken over the show but my content is available for everyone to see and I wanted to remind everyone that I am not going to tolerate slander or trash talking because of a personal opinion. You are entitled to your thoughts and I am entitled to mine.)

Possible TWs!!: Mentions of sex and sexual encounters, M*kio (you cannot stop me from putting this man as a warning I hate him sm), Canon typical violence, Racisim, Homophobia, Mysogyny (did I spell that right??)

Firstly I wanna address her relationship with Mikio in order to fully understand my headcanons.

Personally I do not believe that Mizu actually "loved" Mikio in the romantic sense. She thought she was in love, but in the end it wasn't.

Speaking as someone with a lot of personal trauma regarding relationships myself I realised that I couldn't differentiate between romantic and platonic love. Basically, for me, all I saw was that someone was treating me nicely for once and now I'm attached to them. And for the longest time I thought that was what love was.

And I think Mizu experienced something similar.

Basically, when Mikio treated her like a fucking human being she was like "oh, hey this is nice. This is weird, but it's nice. So I guess I'm in love, right?"

Like, no, baby. You aren't. That's just called emotional trauma.

That's also why she thought she was straight for the longest time because she genuinely cannot tell when she likes someone romantically.

As I often restate it'll take a while for her to fully understand the extent of her emotions, but she'll get there.

Now onto the fluffier stuff :))

~~~

How does she realise she's in love? What's her reaction to it?

I think she gets hit with the realisation as if it were a train crashing into her.

It's just a normal evening, she's probably at a ramen shop with her future S/O with her and then as she's taking a bite of her ramen she looks over at you and thinks: "Huh... I wonder what it would be like if I got to hold them?"

And then it's just a record scratch moment for her where she's like wtf where did that come from.

It's either just normal domestic moment like I mentioned or her future S/O sparring with her (which may or not freak her out bc of the fucking Mikio incident).

But when Mizu successfully pins her S/O down they just laugh and smile, knowing Mizu would never hurt them on purpose.

That made Mizu's heart flutter more than anything Mikio had ever done for her.

She's going to be in denial about it for a long time. Like... a really, really long time. Cue the "but we're just friends"!

How does she react when she realises she's into girls?

Due to the internalized homophobia instilled within her as a child and other such thoughts she starts to think she may be going crazy.

She'll start to pull away out of fear, not truly understanding her emotions.

Which, of course, will hurt her future S/O and cause them to worry.

Seeing her future S/O so distraught kind of triggers something in her. She realises that there's nothing inherently wrong with her, that she's still a person and the person she likes is still a person and that there shouldn't be anything wrong with liking her S/O. She also just didn't like seeing you worry over her, it hurt her more than any blade that she's been stabbed with.

Now onto her actual physical attraction.

Once the whole emotional side of it is somewhat sorted in her mind she finds herself not so subtly staring at her S/O's tatas.

She doesn't strike me as someone with high libido or anything despite what I've seen a lot of headcanons say. But I think shes the kind of lover to enjoy getting her S/O off a lottttt

I don't believe she was ever really attracted to Mikio sexually but seeing her S/O's kimono slip off their shoulder to reveal some titty has her red and hot.

She likes that it's soft. She really likes the softness of her S/O's body.

~~~

(A/N: That's all!! I feel like I was terribly self-indulgent with this one but there are a lot of aspects in which I relate to Mizu with. Which is probably why I care a lot about representing her correctly. As usual, feel free to comment or send asks to my inbox!! I hope y'all enjoyed <33)

#mizu blue eye samurai #i love women #wlw #blue eye samurai #mizu x reader #i love fictional characters #mizu come home the kids miss you #mizu #x reader fluff #mizu x you #x reader #x you #x you fluff #reader insert #fem!reader #gn!reader

[eddiemunsonw]

Snow Storm

Steve Harrington x Fem!reader

Summary: You're on a 'date'. Sort of. You're really not feeling it, especially when you realize that the guy has been lying. Steve, witnessing it all during his shift at Family Video, is more than happy to meddle a little.

CW/Disclaimer: Hmmmm things start to get a little heated and sexy but nothing too dramatic. So... idk. Mention of porn?

Author's note: I have a tendency to post fics out of their season, it seems

Words: 3435

Steve’s POV

He watched as your eyes followed the section of horror movies slowly, scanning each title to try and remember if you had seen them before. Next to you, a guy stood impatiently as he eyed the curtain that separated the adult section. Steve watched with interest, as it was all that was currently happening in the store apart from a regular who looked into the slapstick classics on the other side.

“Come on, I just wanna see.”

The guy sighed, nudged you with his arm. You were having none of it and Steve couldn’t help but wear an amused smile. Eventually, when you had picked out two movies, you followed him towards the curtain. Steve, feeling particularly menacing today, quickly left the counter and approached the curtain just in time.

“Hello there! ID’s please.”

He held his hand open and you took it out immediately, showing that you were 23, a year younger than he was. When the guy handed it over with some reluctance, his curiosity piqued.

“Oof, sorry dude, can’t let you in. It’s 21+”

“What? Since when?” the guy responded, but Steve clocked something much more interesting.

“Clark… You said you were 24. Jesus this is why I never wanna say my age first,” you groaned and rolled your eyes. Steve bit down on his lip to stop himself from smiling, but it was too hard not to.

“Damn, why’d you have to lie to the lady? That’s not cool,” Steve added on.

Your POV

“You weren’t supposed to know. Now come on,” Clark mumbled and attempted to pass the curtain but Steve quickly moved in between, the smooth glide of his body grabbing your attention.

“Still a no, Bud.”

You were already tired of his pushy behavior earlier, so while Steve had him occupied, you entered the adult section. You didn’t even want to go in there, but it was better than staying.

“Grab some deepthroating! And some lesbian porn?”

Steve’s POV

Steve shook his head at him as he leaned against the wall right next to the curtain.

“Jesus, dude. Are you trying to make her run away from you even harder?”

“Shut up,” Clark grumbled, side eyeing him with annoyance.

“Hm, no,” Steve said, a small smile on his face. “Not for a pipsqueak like you.”

“Oh fuck off, says the failed jock whose daddy no longer funds him so he has to do a shitty job like this one, the highlight of his day being to be a total asshole to a guy trying to have sex with a girl.”

Steve stared ahead of him, taking a deep inhale before replying.

“Yeah. Sure. That’s a neat description of you and me both. Emphasis on the trying.”

“The day’s not over yet.”

“Oh but it is, pipsqueak. Cause you’re gonna turn around and leave now.”

They looked at each other, eyes dark and challenging. Steve wasn’t sure what came over him. He just knew that he needed to do you the favor of getting rid of him.

“The hell I am,” Clark bristled.

Steve chuckled darkly. Woah, when did he become this super villain huh? Hmm. Interesting.

“Oh you are. She wants you gone and so do I.”

“You don’t know shit about what she wants.”

“Let me go ask,” Steve said as his hand lazily slid the curtain aside. “What’s her name again?” he asked, pretending like he hadn’t checked your name on your ID. He didn’t wait for his answer and walked behind the curtain despite his protests. This, however, made him miss out on the emergency alert on the radio.

“We interrupt your favorite tunes for an important message. The blizzard is getting worse. If you haven’t yet, go home. Chances are you won’t be able to if you wait much longer.”

Clark, however, did. Besides, he wasn’t that much of an idiot. He knew he had lost his chances with you the moment he tried to get you to grab his favorite porn videos. Whatever.

Your POV

“So… see anything you like?”

His voice startled you, but at the same time it was met with relief from your end that it wasn’t Clark. Steve slowly walked closer and quickly noticed you didn’t seem interested in any of it in the slightest and chuckled.

“Or are you just planning to stay here forever until he leaves?”

You shrugged.

“Something like that. Also, you don’t just ask a lady about her favorite porn, Harrington.”

Delighted by your response, he cocked his hip against the wall as he crossed his arms with a grin.

“I mean… we both already know Clark’s…” Steve said jokingly, earning a smile from you.

“All men are the same,” you sighed. Steve pouted and scanned the titles for something interesting.

“You say that now but… wait until you find out that my favorite is actually… Granny getting a— nope, nope, forget I started that sentence,” Steve said quickly as he put back the tape he just had in his hands.

“All the grannies over the world are crying right now,” you said sadly, a smile on your lips.

“Too bad, I’ve set my eye on girls who actually are the age they say they are.”

“I’ll admit that’s the most interesting belated opening line I’ve ever heard,” you said dryly.

“As long as it catches your intrigue, I’m satisfied,” Steve said with a playful, cocky grin.

You grabbed a tape and smirked, holding it out for him.

“So I’m guessing you don’t need yourself a… Satisfyer 2.0, then?” You asked, holding up the tape which had sensual “instructions” for a vibrator.

Steve laughed and shook his head.

“These satisfy just fine,” Steve said, holding up his hands. Your mind drifted off to what he could do with those big hands. Not just to himself but to—

“… left?”

Steve had apparently just asked you a question.

“Huh?”

He smirked and nodded towards the curtain.

“I think he left. Just heard the bell above the door.”

“Maybe someone came in though…” you wondered out loud.

“Maybe. I’ll go check.” He spun on his heel and approached the curtain when—

“Wait—” It was out before you knew it. Steve halted, turned back around and looked at you patiently.

“Yeah?”

“If he is in fact not gone, can you… get rid of him somehow? I normally wouldn’t ask but he’s just such a—”

“Dick.”

“Yeah…” You smiled a small smile and watched as he approached you again. His eyes were on you, taking in even the smallest changes in your expression.

“So is he like… your boyfriend?” Steve asked softly. “Or uh, was?”

You chuckled and shook your head.

“Nah, this was the second date which I had reluctantly agreed to.”

“Why’d you say yes?” Steve asked curiously. He followed your movement as you skimmed some more tapes and smiled at the playfully quipped corner of your mouth. “I mean, it didn’t look like you wanted to be here.”

“I didn’t. I just… I kind of never said yes but he just showed up on my doorstep and then I felt too bad to not go with him, so… yeah. Didn’t know he had plans to rent some porn and spend the second date in his bedroom or whatever.”

Steve crossed his arms and nodded thoughtfully.

“Hmmh… yeah that sucks. Well, I’ll make sure there won’t be a next time,” he said as he shortly winked at you and once again turned on his heel, this time actually continuing his walk through the curtain. He was out there for a few minutes when he turned back with a frown.

“Uh… Y/N? We’ve got a little… hiccup.”

You approached him with a frown of your own and followed him to the front, unsure what to expect. What you certainly didn’t expect, was to see a snow storm going on outside.

“Apparently there’s a code red. Just heard a repeat of it on the radio but it keeps breaking up. They urge everyone to stay inside until it’s over.”

Steve stuffed his hands into his pockets and stared ahead. It was the worst storm he had ever witnessed and the fact that nothing had seemed to be going on apart from some gentle snowfall surprised him.

“Stay… here?” you asked eventually.

“I mean, yeah? You can’t drive in this weather, it’s too dangerous. So is walking. So…”

“But I can’t just…”

“Hey, I don’t bite,” Steve said softly, nudging your arm with his own. “Besides, Clark seems to have left after all. Maybe he heard the warning and decided to bolt? If so, very nice to let us know as well but I will say that I wasn’t nice to him, so…”

You smirked.

“What did you say to him?”

“Nothing, nothing. I mean, genuinely, I didn’t say much. Just that he had to fuck off, using different wording. He didn’t seem all that ready to leave when I went to look for you though.”

“Oh well, good riddance.”

“Agreed.”

Steve walked forward and locked the door, putting the closed sign up front just in case.

“Let’s go to the back, it’s warmer there. And there’s a coffee machine.”

And so your “Stuck at Family Video with heartthrob Steve Harrington” began.

Once you were settled around the table in the break room, Steve gave you an odd glance. It was hard to figure out what he meant by it, although his frown disappeared the moment he got up from his chair.

“Coffee? Tea? I think we even got a few of those instant hot choc packages,” he offered, his back already turned to you as he searched the cabinets.

“Oh, hot chocolate sounds nice actually. Is it just me or is it… still kinda cold, even here?” you asked hesitantly. Steve nodded ruefully and grabbed two mugs from the cabinet he was currently facing.

“Ah, yeah… it looks like the heating is struggling again. I could kick it to see if it helps but… chances are it’ll get worse.”

“How could it get worse?”

Steve shrugged.

“Beats me, but I’m speaking from experience. Sometimes it does the trick and other times it really, really doesn’t.”

“Let’s not risk it then. At least we have a warm drink, right?”

Steve nodded and grabbed the kettle. You watched him busy himself with putting it on, emptying the hot chocolate powder and grabbing two spoons. He was humming along softly to whichever song he seemed to have stuck in his head and shot you a smile when he caught you looking.

“So what do you usually—”

Suddenly, the room turned pitch dark. You heard Steve swear softly when he shuffled back towards the table and bumped into a chair.

“Uh… okay. That’s… kind of a problem,” he mumbled as he managed to sit back down. “No hot choc I guess, sorry. No… heating either. Maybe we should check how the weather’s doing?” he opted.

“Yeah, sure.”

There was a small strip of light seeping in from the doorway, slowly turning brighter as you adjusted to your surroundings again. Warm fingers teased your arm before your wrist was grabbed and Steve helped you up. As he opened the door, the brightness of the snow outside was almost blinding. The thin windows made it a lot colder at the front, making you shiver as you watched the outside. It wasn’t just snow anymore, as heavy hail rained down, large enough to leave dents into cars. Steve groaned and let go of your wrist.

“Let me check if I can get the power back on,” he mumbled, more to himself than to you. He grabbed a flashlight from below the counter and went to the back again. After a few minutes, he returned, looking apologetic.

“Sorry, nothing. I guess it’s my fault you’re stuck here, huh?” he sighed. “If I hadn’t bothered Clark as much you’d be on your way already. Or if I just… I don’t know. Sorry, I guess.”

“It’s not your fault the weather decided to fuck us over, Steve,” you said with a soft smile which he returned with some hesitance. “What do you usually do for fun around here?”

Steve gave you a wry smile.

“Watch movies?”

“Ah, yeah.”

There was a short silence until Steve clapped in his hands and rubbed them together. “I’ve got this huge blanket in the back, brought it here once because Rob, Robin, my colleague, gets very cold easily so sometimes we’d just huddle under the blanket during breaks and stuff. I think we might as well sit out here, at least it’s light… for now.”

You nodded, smiling as you thought of Robin Buckley. You knew her of course. Not super well, but well enough to know she was nice.

“Yeah, it’s already getting dark, huh? A blanket sounds good though.”

Steve nodded and once again disappeared for a short moment, until he returned with a bright blue blanket, which he partially draped on the floor in front of the counter before he motioned for you to sit down and wrapped it around your shoulders. He joined you after grabbing you both some water and put the other end around his shoulders once he settled down.

“How’s this?”

You were really trying not to let it get to you that you were cozying up to Steve right now. Heat was radiating off of him and it made you wonder if he was actually cold, or if he was basically doing the whole “it’s better to stick together for body warmth” kind of thing. With the addition of clothes, of course.

“It’s nice. Better than without for sure,” you told him softly. Steve’s shoulder brushed yours and soon enough you felt the pressure build up until he was actually resting against you. Not in an uncomfortable way at all. It was really… nice, actually.

“Your parents? Do you think they’ll worry?”

“Ah, no. My mom’s visiting my grandma in another state actually and my dad’s no longer around, so. Doubt he can worry,” you joked lightly. “What about yours?”

Steve snorted, then realized it probably wasn’t all that funny and shrugged.

“Dunno, they’re somewhere in Europe now, I think? So no.”

Another silence. It was by that point that you remembered how little you actually knew about Steve Harrington. Sure, he had been popular in school for some time, and then he wasn’t, and then he graduated. But you had never really talked to him other than giving him a pen or two in English class. You were from different social ladders, really. Although, right now you felt quite equal to him, somehow. Which felt weird, considering he looked like a freshly cut out of a painting model and you were… you. Mr handsome decided to steal you away from your brain, which honestly, was a good thing.

“Hey, wanna play a game?” he asked, peering into your eyes as he leaned forward a little. You watched him with newfound curiosity.

“What kind of game?”

“I spy with my little eye.”

“Isn’t that just called “I spy”?” you wondered aloud.

“Dunno. So. Yes?”

“What else is there, right?”

Steve grinned and rested his head against the counter.

“That’s right. Okay. I spy with my little eye… something green.”

“That tape,” you said as you pointed. Steve leaned into your space, following your hand.

“Which one?”

“The green one.”

“There are maaaany green ones.”

“The green one with… Fuck I can’t read,” you sighed as you tried to squint. Steve laughed warmly, which you could feel the tremble of against your shoulder. “Okay so. The sci-fi shelf, yes? Fifth on the second row.”

“Aaaah, I see it now. Nope!”

“You knew that wasn’t it from the start.”

“I had to make sure.”

“Mhm, sure.”

Steve grinned and nudged you with his shoulder before tapping your thigh with his hand.

“Your turn, your turn!”

He left his hand on your thigh. Oh shit. Yeah, you were totally normal about that. You could still think. You could definitely still find some kind of object that you could use—

“Wait, I didn’t even guess it, how is it my turn?!” you questioned. Steve, who had been looking at… somewhere that wasn’t your eyes, quickly lifted his eyes to meet yours and grinned.

“Right. Guess!” “Your vest?”

“You are absolutely right. See? Your turn.”

“It wasn’t— okay. Hm… I spy with my little eye… something red.”

“Your cheeks.”

“Shut up, my cheeks aren’t red.”

“They are a little.”

“If you keep talking about it, yes, they will turn red.”

“Oh? Is that so?”

Once again Steve leaned forward to look you straight in the eye, this time lifting a hand to cup your cheek gently. “Hm, they’re a little pink at the very least.”

You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks and took his hand off your cheek as you looked away. Steve chuckled softly and turned his hand around so he could grab yours.

“Fine, then… the bike outside?”

“Nope.”

“Damn, I thought that was it for sure. That red blob of paint that Keith never managed to get off the ceiling?”

“That’s it!”

Steve grinned at you and gave your hand a squeeze. For a moment you had forgotten about his hand, too drunk on his animated face. Fuck.

“I spy with my little eye…” Steve turned his head to look at you and smiled. “Something pretty.”

“What?”

“Purple! Purple.”

“My shirt.”

“So clever.”

It was getting darker rapidly and soon enough, even your little game became harder to play. You did some other ones, word games, guessing games, whatever you could think of. The blanket was wrapped closer around you both now, as the store became colder without the heating. You sat hip to hip, your arms a little awkward sometimes although neither of you really minded.

“Would you have stayed here if I hadn’t been around?” you asked softly.

“Hmm, nah, I don’t think so.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t really care if— I mean, I’d only be risking myself in that case.”

“That’s a bad reason. You’re just as important.”

“Am I?” Steve asked, and for some reason you felt like he needed an honest answer.

“Yeah, you are, Steve.”

“Hm…” A beat of silence. “I spy with my little eye… someone pretty.”

“You can’t even see.”

“I’ve memorized her by now.”

“Is it the blonde babe cardboard cutout?”

Steve, not expecting that answer at all, burst out laughing.

“Fuck, no,” a giggle, “it wasn’t.”

“Oh… hm. What about that girl from the ring? Samara?”

“Shush.”

“Or the woman from that movie where—” “Ssshh.”

You felt his hand cup your cheek and it was as if your heart was gonna jump out of your chest at any moment now. His breath tickled your cheek, warm and comfortable against your cold nose. Your lips parted on their own, eyes closing even though there was only an outline of his face to see.

“You sure it’s not the blond babe?” you murmured teasingly.

Steve giggled softly and shook his head, causing the stray strands of his hair to tickle you a little.

“Positive.”

A faint sound of lips being licked, and then his lips brushed against yours. Soft and pliable, eager to taste yours. He hummed softly, pleased, as he pulled you closer. You were easily pulled into his lap as his tongue teased your bottom lip for access. Hands smoothed up and down your waist, the blanket forgotten as your kiss provided enough heat between the two of you. It was silent, save from the gasps and soft, pleasant hums leaving you both. He gently moved his hips while simultaneously guiding yours, a gentle moan leaving him as he found a rhythm. His lips found your neck and your hand made its way into his hair to have something to grasp onto. One hand found the hem of your shirt and he was about to lift it up when—

Brightness. Light. The electricity was back on. Meaning… everyone outside could see you. If there had been anyone, that is. Still, it broke the moment instantly as Steve dropped his hand to your thigh and looked up at you.

“Shit,” he murmured, a lopsided grin on his face. “They really know how to spoil the fun today, huh?”

You smiled down at him and turned around to look outside, one hand resting on his chest for balance.

“Hm… I don’t know. It seems safe to go back home.”

Steve dug his fingers into your hips with eagerness before leaving a soft kiss on your lips.

“Your place or mine?”

end.

If you enjoyed reading this, please know that comments and reblogs are highly appreciated :) Likes are lovely but sadly do nothing to spread the fics around! Help your favorite writers (not saying me - in general) out like that so you can continue to enjoy consuming the free work they put out, it's a win-win.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x fem!reader #stranger things fanfics #joe keery #i'm so great at promoting my fics with a cool description #not

[redr0sewrites]

Thoughts on Lute's tits? I wanna suck on them so baddd I bet they're perfect (WLW pls)

RAHSGSSGAGSGSSG????? feeling very sapphic today have i ever told u i love women

🥀Cw: fluff, smut, boobs, boob kink (?), fem!reader

🥀minors dni

lute never put much weight into her physical appearance, however she does have a wonderful body- she's both muscular and soft, with strong thighs, arms, and a toned stomache yet curvy hips and chest

once she starts dating you, she begins to notice how much you really enjoy her chest, and honestly it flusters her a little, she isn't used to receiving so much attention and she is more than a little touch starved

lute would never admit it but she loves when you lay your head on top of her chest, and when you fall asleep with your face pressed into her boobs? she always wakes up horny, she's probably very sensitive...

before you, lute probably did not get laid very often, hell, she doesn't even masturbate much, making her all the more sensitive once you guys began to get intimate

her boobs are definitely a big erogenous zone, and touching them is one of the quickest ways to turn her on

the first time you started touching her chest was during a heated makeout session, you were straddling her on your bed and you reached up under her shirt to grope her as she fisted a hand in your hair. she let out a sharp moan as you palmed her breast through her sports bra, her entire back arching as you massaged her hardened nipple

lute's entire face flushes with embarrassment at her own sensitivity, yet you find it so so hot. she's usually so uptight and serious, and the fact that she has such a sensitive weak spot only makes playing with her tits more appealing

LUTE IS A SPORTS BRA AND BOXERS LESBIAN AND IT IS SO. FUCKING. HOT. HGHHHHH

lute definitely walks around the house shirtless just to tease you because she knows how irresistible she is

loves when you suck on her tits, she might even have you call her mommy or mistress if you're especially desperate

loves fingering you while you suck on her boobs, the way you drool on her chest and your mind goes fuzzy while you suck on her nipple just from the way her fingers are fucking you? ughhh she eats it up and adores it every time

whenever you ride her strap or thigh, you always take off her shirt and bra to just watch her boobs. sometimes she'll grab you by the hair and force you to suck on them, and i also think she could be into you using a vibrator on her chest... 👀

sometimes when she's especially busy during work or just away from you in general, she'll randomly send you a picture of her perfect tits, or a video of her fucking herself on a dildo, with her tits bouncing perfectly for you to see

lute doesn't wear revealing clothing very often, but sometimes she'll take of her shirt when training leaving her in just a sports bra, and it's actually so hot to watch your girlfriend train, her perfect tits in view as she fights ruthlessly (you really are whipped huh- i cant blame you i am too)

lute will ask you to ride her abs, and then practically beg you to grope her tits while you grind your pretty, aching pussy over her toned stomach

lute loves when you both are scissoring and your chests rub together, she just loves feeling your bare skin against hers

she also enjoys it when you mark her boobs, lute will pretend to be irritated but will secretly admire the hickies on her chest and occasionally take pictures of them to look at later- she loves the idea that you left behind any sort of mark on her, and will absolutely return the favor

when it comes to your boobs lute is a closeted perv, she loooveeesss when you wear low cut tops or lacy lingerie that shows off your assets. whether you have big boobs or small boobs she does not care, she will show your chest unrelenting attention all the same

lute will come up behind you and grope your chest in public, only for a split second so no one notices, and then act innocent when you turn on her

if you have big boobs lute will literally get so turned on when she sees you in something revealing, im talking full gay panic mode as she struggles to look anywhere BUT your chest.

if you have smaller boobs, no worries! lute loves when you don't wear a bra underneath a tighter shirt so she can watch your nipples harden when she teased you, and having smaller boobs only makes it that much more convenient for her to tear off your shirt and play with your breasts

lute loves when you wear necklaces she bought you while you both fuck, and seeing the charm rest between the valley of your breasts makes her a bit feral

lute likes taking photos of your boobs while you both are fucking for her to jack off to later, and definitely has an album in her phone dedicated to pictures of your perfect tits in lacy lingerie, or covered in her bitemarks

"fuck, lute, y'really are perfect," you murmur, pressing soft kisses to her neck. lute doesn't reply, opting to turn her head away from you as her cheeks flush. your onslaught of kisses travels lower down to her collarbone, where you begin to suck a hickey into her pale skin. lute shivers at the sensation of your tongue sucking on her skin, one hand coming to rest on your hips while the other tangles itself in your hair. your lips travel lower, down between the valley of her breasts, only to pause as she lets out a soft whine. your mouth latches onto one nipple, sucking on the hardened bud while you toy with her other breast.

"fuuuck- that feels good," lute gasps, her grip on your hair tightening as you let out a stifled moan. her thigh slips between your legs, pressing up against your aching heat. you let out a soft whine, unable to stop yourself from grinding down against her thigh. lute smirks, her free hand gripping the sheets as you continue pleasuring her chest. your teeth graze over her nipple and she lets out a soft moan, watching as your tongue swirls over the bud. your hips begin to move faster as the ache in your core only grows more unbearable. lute watches a small trail of drool leak from your mouth as you mewl, keening from the pleasure between your legs.

lute's back arches as your legs clamp down around her thigh, the coil in your abdomen snapping as your orgasm washes over you. as you come down from your high, you collapse against her chest, and lute smirks. "aw, don't tell me you're too tired to continue, i'm just getting started baby!" you shoot lute a glare, and she snickers in response. "oh please," you murmur, pinching one of her nipples in between two fingers, watching as a wanton moan slips past her lips as she squirms. "i'm not done yet ~"

sorry the smut is mid i am sleepy and i didnt want it to get too long 🫠 ANYWAYSSSS HOPE U ENJOYED!!! I LOVE LUTE RAHHH

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel x y/n #hazbin hotel x oc #hazbin hotel lute #hazbin hotel lute x reader #lute x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel imagine #lute imagine #lute headcanon #hazbin hotel headcanon #lute x you #lute x oc #lute x y/n #wlw smut #wlw #lute x reader smut #lute smut #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin smut #hazbin hotel x reader smut #hazbin hotel fanfiction

[twiixr4kidz]

PRAYING YOU GIVE US SOME THE EVIL EXES X A DUMBASS S/O PLEASEEEE

Like they're so dumb it's not a joke- like imagine Roxy asking her s/o about the menu at a restaurant they're going to and they go "babe....I'm a lesbian." And it takes a full FIVE MINUTES for them to figure out what she meant

OMG YES i am a certified dumbass so this was very easy to write

matthew patel:

listen....... he gets it

he isn't the sharpest tool in the shed

it's like when you're around each other, your brain cells disappear

most discussions end in the two of you looking at each other, very confused, whatever conversation you were having being long forgotten

he doesn't mind re-explaining thinsg to you if you don't understand them

he thinks it's kinda cute honestly

lucas lee:

he is the himbo-est himbo to ever himbo

honestly most of ramona's exes are dumb but in different endearing ways

i can tell you for a fact that he'll tease you for one thing and then proceed to do it immediately after without even realizing

OR HE'LL TRY TO LIKE SHOW YOU WHAT YOU WERE DOING WRONG AND HOW TO FIX IT AND THEN HE MESSES IT UP HIMSELF LMFAO

"babe, that's not how you do a kickflip. THIS is." (he bails and breaks his board)

todd ingram:

todd is probably one of the most confused people you will ever meet

sometimes you say things that completely baffle him

im talking something so dumb his jaw is hanging wide open and he's rendered completely fucking speechless

and you're confused as to why HE'S confused because you thought you explained what you were saying really well

but you very much did not

there are so many conversations you have with him that are cut short because he doesn't know how to respond

"hon... look at me... what?" "huh?" "did you hear a word you just said?" "wait... what did i say?"

roxie richter:

she thinks it's cute!!!

most of the time

other times, she's genuinely concerned for your sanity

"so... whatcha wanna eat?" "babe, im a lesbian" "...what?" "what do you mean what?" "i know... you're a lesbian... i was asking about the food..." "OH"

you cannot hear apparently

she thinks it's funny whenever you do that thing where you hear her but you don't process what she said so you go "what" and then you cut her off when she tries to explain cuz you finally have an answer

she thinks it's HILARIOUS

kyle katayanagi:

he thinks it's hysterical

like you know this motherfucker is the ultimate tease

you don't know the answer to a question? you say something that sounds dumber than you intended it to?

you know damn well he's getting on your case about it

and honestly he loves it

he knows he's smart but he's fascinated by your sheer stupidity

he doesn't mind explaining things to you either

but you aren't getting out of an explanation without him calling you, and i mean this in the most affectionate way possible, a dumbass

ken katayanagi:

he's ALSO very fascinated with the fact that none of your millions of brain cells work

even when it comes to what he thinks is a simple concept, it takes a lot of explaining for you to understand

this is explaining that he doesn't mind doing

maybe his knowledge is just a little TOO advanced

he can never tell if he's the one whose too smart or if it's just your natural dumbness

it confuses him

he's enamored

literally say one dumbass thing around him and he's gonna have you pinned to a wall in the most intense makeout session of your life

gideon graves:

listen... gideon isn't as much of a douche as everyone makes him out to be

he thinks you being dumb is adorable

something about his weird thing for control and how he loves to explain things to you

he doesn't wanna control in a toxic way, let me just get that out there

he just loves how you never seem to know what's going on

god he loves it HE LOVES IT

#matthew patel #matthew patel x reader #lucas lee #lucas lee x reader #todd ingram #todd ingram x reader #roxie richter #roxie richter x reader #kyle katayanagi #kyle katayanagi x reader #ken katayanagi #ken katayanagi x reader #gideon graves #gideon graves x reader #scott pilgrim #scott pilgrim vs the world #spvtw #scott pilgrim takes off #spto

[criminalmindswhore]

Pulling Women

Morgan claims you can't pull so you flirt with Emily...

tw: flirting, sexual tension, mentions smut, praise, brat talk

The bullpen erupted into laughter as Reid failed at saying his pick up line, "Reid just admit it, you have zero game." Morgan said as he sipped his coffee. Reid looked offended, "Look I don't need pickup lines because my smarts do the work for me." Reid shot back from his desk. You looked between the two of them and Morgan took notice. "Y/n, I feel like you are the same as Reid." You faked offense and put your hand over your heart, "I am deeply offended that you think I can't pull women." Just as you finished Emily walked back into the bullpen and went to the kitchen to grab coffee. Morgan pointed at her, "Then pull Prentiss." To Morgan, Emily seemed like the kind of woman no one could flirt with. What Morgan didn't know is that Emily had a big fat lesbian crush on you. Emily wanted you in her bed, under her control, and you knew it, "Oh, I can pull Prentiss."

Emily watched the steam rise from her mug and took a deep breath. She just got done taking a statement from an unsub who really got under her skin. It was music to her ears when your voice hit her ears, "Hey Em." You slid up behind her, your hand barely grazing her lower back, sending a chill down her spine. You leaned on the counter next to her, your eyes grazed over her taking in every single detail. How her belt hugged her waist, the way her fingers grasped her mug, how her bangs sat on her forehead. Emily watched you check her out, she saw your pupils dilate and knew immediately the game you were playing. "You look amazing today Emily," the compliment floated off your tongue in the most seductive way you could muster. Emily set her mug down and took a step closer to you. Close enough for you to notice, but not enough to be considered unprofessional in the workplace. Morgan watched from afar, a teasing smile on his face.

"I could say the same about you, pretty girl." The way it sounded coming from Emily almost made your knees buckle, but you were here on a mission. "Do you want to grab drinks on Friday after work? There's a new bar on my street I've been wanting to try." Prentiss was almost shocked by your offer until she remembered the way you blushed when she caught you during a chase last week. Emily grabbed your arm, her fingers lightly dancing as she ran her hand down it, "I would love to," She quirked an eyebrow, "but it seems you're interested in more than just drinks Y/n." You swallowed the lump in your throat and stood up straight, "I guess that's for Friday Emily to find out huh?" You licked your bottom lip, looked at Emily's lips, made eye contact, and said, "Unless you wanna find out sooner, or can you not put your money where your mouth is?" Emily could hear the brat in your voice and it sent a shock straight to her core.

Reid breathed out, "I can't tell if she's failing or if Emily is a little too into this." Morgan looked at him, "Oh she's failing for sure. Prentiss is untouchable." He sounded so confident that Reid even believed him and averted his attention back to the duo at the coffee machine.

Emily turned so her back was to Morgan and Reid, blocking their view of your face. She leaned in close, closer than she should be at work, "I can already tell I have my work cut out for me with you, maybe you need to learn now who's in charge." Your cheeks turned bright red and you clutched the counter with one hand, desperately trying to pull your brain from the fog. "Maybe I do." That's the best you could get out of your mouth with Emily peering at you through her thick eyelashes and her voice lowering an octave. "Good girl." You gasped and it went directly to Emily's head. A devilish smile graced Emily's face, "My apartment, tonight, 7pm. Do not be late."

With that, Emily grabbed her mug and headed to Garcia's office to get some information from her. You took a moment to compose yourself before returning to Morgan, who still thought you failed. "So how did it go?" Reid looked at you expecting you to say you failed. "We have plans." Morgan's mouth fell open, "With Prentiss?" Reid smiled, no matter the circumstances, he loved seeing Morgan be wrong. Happy that Morgan failed, Reid returned to his desk. You shrugged your shoulders, "I'm hot, confident, and good with words, why are you shocked?" Morgan set down his mug, "Are you saying I can't pull Prentiss because I'm not hot?" You sat at your desk beside his, "Precisely." Emily approached from behind, "Morgan just admit it, Y/n is hotter than you."

#criminal minds #emily prentiss fanfic #emily prentiss #emily prentiss x reader #criminalmindsxreader #spencer reid #derek morgan

[gubbles-owo]

For the tail rating: Asbestos (arknights), Ho'oleyak (arknights) and W (arknights)

HEAVY HITTERS RIGHT AWAY, HUH??

okay, so like. i want to be fair, right? i'm less interested in ranking tails *against* each other so much as I am in appreciating the variety of them. but like. if i had to choose the best tail in arknights. IF WE'RE ALL BEING HONEST HERE,,, yeahhh Asbestie would win this one absolutely no fucking contest. It's long. It's got volume. It's dexterous. It's WET. if you try getting your grubby little paws on the thing she will bear no hesitation in kicking your fucking teeth in for even thinking about it, so on top of all these amazing qualities it is also FORBIDDEN. lord knows there is only one person on terra who knows how it tastes, and I bet she's addicted to it. Asbestos tail rating: i need to choke on it Next up is- wait oh my fucking god jesus fuck. ign christ holy shit.

sorry to be such a lesbian but. god. fuck. focus here gubby. okay like i said i'm not really ranking tails against one another here, but ho'ol would certainly give asbestos a run for her money. it definitely would win out in the length department, because christ look at this thing

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it's long as fuck. it's swift and silent, imbued with terrible strength. in her spoken voicelines she DIRECTLY references the doctor (u) choking on her tail. not from her tail or otherwise implying some kind of choke-hold, nonono. ON. this thing is going down your fucking throat and you are going to like it. ...i wonder what it tastes like. admittedly i did not finish lone trail before the event closed, but even from what i saw, the written descriptions of ho'ol's tail. some lucky tail enthusiast had a field day describing how her tail moves about in detail so intricate i can only describe it as fetishistic. and that is a COMPLIMENT goddammit. if this tail does nothing for you then i am sorry bb but there's no saving you. Ho'olheyak tail rating: i need to choke on it. and i suppose with that it's time to bring things back down to earth, because, okay if i'm being honest w's tail is. fine? but like. man given the previous two this just doesn't hit the same way...

The barbed shape is kinda neat, but in general this thing is pretttttty thin. If you know me at all then you know where i stand on the whole thin vs. phat tail debate, so I can't say W's tail impresses me all that much. Very thin, but very light and I imagine pretty quick. I wonder how sharp the end of that thing really is, but I'd guess that's it's likely safe to touch. I'm still in chapter 6 and admittedly don't know much about W as a character yet, but I imagine she'd either cause petty mischief with it in some way or alternatively get all embarrassed pissed if it's accidentally touched. I wonder what it tastes like. W tail rating: i am probably going to step on it (by accident)

#hi this took me over an hour to write #and i have none regrets #...but i forgot to take sleep meds wHOOPSIE #gubbles' official tail ratings #asbestos arknights #ho'olheyak #w #arknights