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#i almost threw hands
bobbybriggs · 1 year
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#joel miller, coffee's number one fan.
THE LAST OF US, 01.04 - "Please Hold To My Hand."
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finalgoob · 2 years
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in a happier world, i’d like to think that leia would run to obi-wan whenever she’d have a tiff with anakin lmao 😭
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massyworld · 6 months
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Side-by-side together. For all time.
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Always.
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sixofbabycrows · 2 months
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ngl i loved gabe getting petrified just cause he took the liberty to open percy’s mail even more than sally doing it on purpose in the book. like the guy got himself killed by being an asshole and they didn’t even have to try lmao
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mattodore · 8 months
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you can break, throw yourself away, leave it behind. and, if you need to, you can break me too. you can disappear, but please just take me with you when you go.
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bisexualmajima56 · 7 days
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Majima is very cat like for someone who’s called The Mad Dog of Shimano
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sirenserendipity · 2 months
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just finished moving around/reorganizing my entire bedroom. i have cried three times today but now i’m laying in bed, my room smells of roses, and i’m eating french bread. this was not the bipolar hot girl mania i was promised but damn if i don’t do it well
#i haven’t been sleeping well at all whatsoever for the past two weeks and it’s gotten to the point where my dreams are so vivid but not just#like ugh i can’t explain it on here because im not about to open a whole can of worms like that in my tags and be like revealing#family secrets.#essentially i am having normal dreams but they are horrendously vivid and of no real purpose.#i woke up fucking like completely upset this morning and then started crying#my roommate thinks it’s because i haven’t been sleeping + everything else going on#and like ya know what she’s PROBABLY right#but even still i just need my body to LISTEN TO ME and stop being all sensitive!!!#i legitimately almost texted the loml this long text today and thank fuck i didn’t because who knows where that would lead#but i’ve been having dreams about them too and it’s frustrating me. like the universe is trying beyond all measure to push us back together#and i just have to keep saying no. it’s like this test of morality except it never fucking ENDS and the consequence is actually pleasure and#relief beyond measure. like— to even just kiss them again? to hear them say my name again.#whenever we’re out at the same time i can feel them staring at me and i can see them in my peripherals watching me#just fucking forcing this love into me. the feeling of their hands on my body and all of their questions about how i’m doing#god i can feel all of it.#i nearly fucking threw up last time a few weeks ago when they kept watching me and i got so overloaded with emotions and my fucking stomach#wouldn’t stop turning. but anyways right like— i cannot be with them and i don’t want to be. like yes im still attracted to them and yes i#feel all of these feelings but it stops me dead in my tracks when i remember what they said and the things they did.#i am not the woman who bends my convictions because i love someone. i can’t be that person. i won’t be that person. not for anyone and#not for them. but i see them in my dreams anyways and it is all too real and too present. it’s hardly ever the present so why. why why why?#it makes me terrified thinking that i will one of these nights just say yes and they’ll kiss me and everything that means anything in myself#will virtually mean nothing. like i won’t be a good person because i’ve knowingly allowed them to have me.#so anyways yeah and the fact that my snapchat memories and everything else are just FILLED with pictures and videos of us is killing me.#i really am scared that i’ll just give in. and what worse is that i would just double down and not tell anyone. i wouldn’t fucking#tell a soul if we did anything because i just know it isn’t right. and the fact that i know i wouldn’t be honest means i KNOW it’s bad.#so what the fuck. the fuck am i supposed to do when i have all these dreams and even just the ones about my mom and my brother#my family- i want to talk to them about it. i want to fucking cry to them and tell them how much it hurts that they hurt people and i’m just#some occasional exception to that because they love me. and i want to fucking scream. i want to know why. i want to fuck them until they#can barely breathe and then do it all over again. i want to feel their perfect fingers inside me and i want their mouth on mine. i fucking#HATE that they couldn’t be a good person. ugh okay anyways why did you read this??
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Look, we thought pairing my LDB up with freaking Yrsarald Thrice-Pierced instead of Ulfric would be funny.
It wasn't. It was just sad.
As I told my dear sweet @elder-dragon-reposes, it's one thing for one of Ulfric's followers clear across Skyrim to get heart eyes for Ulfric's girlfriendsword arm, but it's another matter entirely if it's one of his generals. In his own city.
Yrsarald remembers the Dragonborn from when she came to call Ulfric to the Greybeards' council. He remembers that she was soft-spoken and adamant about the World-Eater. She's hopeful and compassionate, and that stands out to him, even if she is an elf.
Ulfric doesn't seem to mind her ancestry, so Yrsarald elects to ignore it untilunless it becomes a problem.
News comes that Alduin has been banished, and the Dragonborn is about Skyrim, helping people. It's . . . nice that the foreign half-elf seems to care so much for the well-being of Skyrim and her people. Yrsarald keeps tabs on her through the informants and spy networks. It's a matter of security if the Dragonborn turns traitor to Skyrim and helps the blasted Thalmor. Galmar isn't keeping up with it, so for Ulfric and the Stormcloaks' sake, Yrsarald is.
But all he hears are good things. She wins admiration everywhere she goes, but she doesn't belong anywhere. Balgruuf the Greater is trying to tie the Dragonborn to Whiterun, but she's as flighty as Kyne's winds. Somewhere in there, Yrsarald learns her name is Leara Ormand and she's from HIgh Rock. She grew up on magic and chivalry. She probably sees life as a fairy tale. He may disdain her for it.
But then she comes to Windhelm. They've had troubles of their own, being stretched between the care of the city and fighting a war. And she solves problems. He hears she's investigating the serial killer in town . . .
. . .then finds the Butcher, and she's hurt? Ulfric is concerned, but Yrsarald finds himself livid. He cannot see his Jarl's worry for his own shame that their hero came to help them, and all she got in return was a bleeding wound and permafrost on her skin.
Imagine being so in love with an otherwise mythic figure, a celebrity, that you can't see that your friend, your brother, is also in love with her. How can you see it when you aren't ready to admit your own feelings?
Leara is renting a room at Candlehearth when Yrsarald decides he needs to pay his respects to her. She is surprised when he meets her near dinner. He has never seen a woman so precisely featured before. She's not in armor (he's only seen her in silver plate); her hair is down (curling in blood rose vines) and she's bundled in a cornflower blue dress (it's loose to accommodate her bandages). He wants to sit down and talk to her, but he doesn't. He thanks her, though, and she smiles. He stops by the counter later to make sure Elda sends her a dessert .
"But don't bother her with who it's from." "Well if that's how you choose to show your appreciation."
Yrsarald buys Leara sweets after that. She doesn't know it's him. She knows it's someone who appreciates her service and feels bad about her getting hurt, but Elda won't crack. Drat the woman.
Leara wonders if Ulfric is gifting her the sweets. She wants to hope it's Ulfric. She wants their past to be past and for her to appreciate everything she continues to do not for him, but to his benefit; she wasn't drawn in by his smile or anything. Who else would it be if not him? Ralof? He's not in town. General Stone-Fist didn't seem too bothered about her.
Leara's still healing. She's not bedridden or anything, but she's not fit to go beyond the city gates where there are bandits and dragons and necromancers (oh my!), so she decides that visiting the court wizard might be a fruitful investment of her time. She shuffles off to the Palace of the Kings. She runs into Jorleif right off and, on telling him she'd like to visit the court wizard, he's ready to take her to Wuunferth because she's been to see him before, and after all, she is the Dragonborn.
And this is that delightful moment when fate can swing either way because if Ulfric shows up and offers to walk Leara, that's all she wrote. Yrsarald's lost his chance because now that soft smile from Candlehearth is directed at the Jarl, not him, and Yrsarald will never get it back.
But maybe, just maybe, if Yrsarald gets to Leara before Ulfric does, if he captures her attention in conversation, maybe she'll look at him.
For a general commanding troops, it's terribly hard to be brave before a woman.
He would ask her how she's healing from the attack, and Leara would sigh, tired with herself but patient in her speech, because she's healing but she feels like she's letting the people down. And the tips of her ears might turn pink (Yrsarald didn't know elf ears did that) because Leara didn't mean to be that candid and trouble him – but Yrsarald is tripping over himself to tell her that she's done more for Skyrim than anyone (why is his neck red?) and it's reasonable for her to convalesce after an injury.
"Rest and eat apple tarts." ". . . how did you know I was eating apple tarts?"
Yrsarald coughs (he did not mean to tell her that). Leara is staring at him. They're at Wuunferth's quarters. She blinks at him before thanking him for guiding her through the palace. Then she's gone, and Yrsarald is kicking himself for being an idiot.
He's smitten.
Soon (too soon) Leara has healed from her injury and she's at the palace again, but this time she's offering to help Ulfric negotiate a permanent peace between both sides. Ulfric's seen Leara at the table, he knows what she can do. Galmar is more skeptical, but when Ulfric looks to Yrsarald for his opinion (and Leara's too-blue winter deep eyes follow) he says to let her have at it.
Leara needs to be brought up on the Stormcloaks holdings and Ulfric says he'll help her, but then Galmar needs him for something else and Yrsarald (does NOTdoes) jumps at the chance to help the Dragonborn. She's attentive and quiet, and asks the right questions about supplies and movements. And Yrsarald realizes as he's talking to her that Leara has been in a war before.
"Were you in the Great War?"
The stiffening of her shoulders is almost imperceptible. He'd have missed it if he weren't watching her so intently.
"Yes."
Her reply is measured. She does not lie.
"Legion?"
Because everyone was in the Legion then. Back when it fought for Skyrim. He wouldn't fault her if she was . . . why is her face sour? Her mouth is pinched.
"It doesn't matter–" "It does."
Why does it matter? He wonders, why is he pressing?
Her eyes are wide. So wide and too-blue.
Leara looks ill.
And then he knows.
He knew from the beginning she couldn't be trusted. She was an elf. All elves scurried back to the Thalmor in the end. She was here for that blasted Thalmor "ambassador" – she would betray Ulfric and the sons of Skyrim to their deaths!
There's a breathless scream.
Yrsarald doesn't realize until then that he has her on the ground. She's so small and too precisely featured. Her eyes are too blue. She's a traitor, a liar, a fraud–
The Dragonborn does not care for Skyrim.
"Yrsarald, please–"
Yrsarald growls.
Why is she crying? Doesn't she realize what she's doing to Skyrim? – Done to him? All this time and Yrsarald realizes he let Leara lure him into a fairy tale, only for her to shatter it with frigid reality when he thinks, when he thinks . . .
He might love her.
But elves can't love.
"You will rue the day you stepped foot in Skyrim, elf!"
She's sobbing. If she were really a true Dragonborn, she'd try and Shout him off, but Yrsarald wonders if she lied about that, too. High Elf illusions.
"Yrsa–" "What's going–?!"
Then Yrsarald is yanked back forcibly. Galmar is there. And Ralof. And Ulfric.
Ulfric is on the floor with her. Kneeling beside her as she gasps and tears turn her white gold face into wet porcelain. Kneeling beside her as if the elf wasn't going to sell Ulfric and everything they'd worked for to the Thalmor!
Yrsarald strains against Galmar and Ralof. He grits his teeth.
"She's Thalmor!"
Galmar stills. Ralof pales. Ulfric's head is bowed. She isn't making any noise but she struggles to breathe and it's tearing Yrsarald apart and enraging him all at once.
"I know."
And with those words, Yrsarald questions everything he ever knew about Ulfric Stormcloak. Ulfric knew she was a Thalmor spy? Was he coming to stop her – but . . .
Then Ulfric is lifting Leara from the ground, helping her to her feet, and it's too gentle for a King about to arrest an enemy.
Her hands are grasping Ulfric's arm, her eyes wide. Ulfric's face is drawn.
"We will discuss this later."
And he walks out with her. And the elf is free. And Yrsarald doesn't understand.
And then Galmar speaks:
"What in Oblivion did you do?!"
Yrsarald . . . doesn't know anymore.
What he learns later is more than he could stomach. Leara was a member of the Thalmor and she was a member of the Blades before that, and during the war, she smuggled information from the Dominion to the Blades intelligence networks and then defected while smuggling Ulfric Stormcloak from captivity.
He's nauseous when Ralof tells him this. Respectful Ralof – save this time there's steel in his eyes and disdain in his voice.
Yrsarald realizes he deserves that.
Later, when she finds him at Candlehearth, drinking his weight in ale, he realizes he does not deserve the understanding and forgiveness and the self-loathing in her face.
"I know why you did what you did. I can't fault you for it, not when I could've sold your Jarl and cause out to the Dominion. But I–"
Leara's eyes trail off.
"I'm sorry."
He chokes out the words. Her eyes slip back. She was far away.
"I think it's for the best if we're not alone together anymore."
Then she's gone.
Yrsarald buys another round.
The next day, Galmar says Ulfric wants him in the Pale. Far away from the Dragonborn goes unspoken between them.
Yrsarald goes. Ulfric's face is hard when he bids Yrsarald goodbye. The Jarl is not as easily forgiving as the Dragonborn.
Yrsarald is in the Pale when, a month later, news comes that the Dragonborn is handling an armistice in Whiterun. Skyrim divided. What was she thinking? She's thinking for Skyrim, Yrsarald realizes. That's all she's thought about this entire time.
It's a year before he returns to the Eastern capital of Windhelm, and only then, it's because the High King is getting married.
Yrsarald sees her. He doesn't stay long after that.
After all, Ulfric would protect her. Had protected her. Even from Yrsarald.
He could live with that.
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marchsage · 1 year
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i see the dad lance content and raise you: mentor/older sister figure (auntie) clair
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hotasfahrenheit · 5 months
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OH MY GOD I ALMOST THREW MY PHONE ACROSS THE ROOM PLS
FINALLY
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I'M SCREAMING
They HAVE to be giving us a second season PLEASE give me Mix and Mond and Title main character mess with the crew from this season as side/background characters, let Mark find love, let Papang come back and kiss some more dudes
Jojo said there's scripts and there's clearly intent so let's rolllllllllllllll boys
DON'T BE COWARDS GMMTV
Once we actually got Boeing I knew Mix was wrong for the character and Mond was the best choice but I was still hoping for Mix somehow to come in and just PLEASE with or without Earth, I need this
(honestly preferably without, keep mixing up the couples, almost everyone kissed everyone else in this show and we deserve more of that)
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i watched the oscars once because i was a guest and could not change the tv program and its the most masturbatory and painfully boring and unfunny event i have ever sat through
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theaologies · 7 months
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Karlach missed her strike against Minthara and I was mad and my last option was Shove and I was like “whatever it won’t do much” but guess where Minthara went
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Karlach literally went
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neechees · 7 months
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I forgot to ask my doctor what my blood type is and here I almost passed out when I was getting my blood drawn in July
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definitelynotnia · 5 months
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got a piece of glass stuck in my foot and my mother chose that moment to start yelling about how stupid and lazy i am like :) we're not taking customer feedback right now ma'am :) there is literally my blood on my hands can u please maybe wait :) and do this at another time :)
#for context the thing that broke was not even hers it was mine i ordered it for myself and she didn't tell me it arrived and just kept it in#her wardrobe#and then she asked me to fetch smthn from her messy asf wardrobe and she had kept it (made of glass) in the utmost corner of her very messy#and packed shelf#and obv one of the bottles in the shell was almost empty so when my hand brushed against it it fell and knocked down the glass bottle#bcz it was kept in the c o r n e r#but its ok it was an accident but still it was my accident so i just silently started clearing it up and she obv started yelling at me but#thats fine ive grown up in this household i know that when u do smthn accidentally its always bcz u are a dumb ho and when ur brown parents#do smthn accidentally then its fine bcz accidents happen and also that too is actually ur fault somehow bcz if u hadn't done xyz then 5 day#later this never wouldve happened#but wtv its fine wtv#and then i noticed the piece of glass sticking outta my foot and she watched me try to pull it out with my nails#and once i pulled it out it slipped from between my nails and fell onto the floor#and immediately she started yelling at me again saying i 'threw' it onto the floor on purpose like bitch I'm bleeding bcz of that thing why#would i risk bleeding again#and secondly i was literally picking up all the glass shards two seconds ago why would i throw this onto the floor on purpose when i litera#lly emptied the floor of glass two MINUTES AGO#and when i told her it just slipped and i didn't do it on purpose she's like dont argue with me i saw what happened like oh did u#im sure only u did its not like it was IN MY HAND I'm sure you had a better view than i did of what is in MY hand#this is such a stupid thing to rant about on tumblr but I'm just so tired#i literally had just woken up from a nap i was minding my own business trying yo make myself some coffee#this just irritated me so damn much like#if u really think im that much of a dumb lazy bitch then why did u ask me to do that thing for u in the first place ur literally sitting#in front of the wardrobe why didnt u just go and fetched that thing from ur wardrobe by yourself#ugh wtv this is ridiculous
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khathastrophe · 5 months
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I really like how, just like Dan, the audience completely loses the grasp of reality when Dan doesn't have his lucid stone
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mira-blue · 1 year
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mercymaker song of all time btw
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