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#human experience is wondering whats out there
elodieunderglass · 2 days
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Hi! I was wondering if you could help me out with a word I've forgotten? I'm trying to remember the name for a concept that (I think) talks about how people better understand or process Things once they have vocabulary to describe it - I've heard it talked about in regards to the colour orange, or coercive control, etc.
long story short i've just read a paper saying ancient Greeks and Romans weren't racist bc they had no word for racism and am trying to form an argument against!
(no worries if this is unanswerable, i'm aware its a bit of a long shot but you struck me as a person who Knows Things)
That’s extremely kind and funny of you. i don’t know much but i am ok at synthesis.
I think you might be thinking of the concepts loosely called the “Sapir-Whorf hypothesis”, which describes something called “linguistic determinism.” This idea has been “disproven”, as it is just too reductionist as a concept - people are clearly perfectly capable of having experiences that are tough to describe with words. There will be plenty of papers showing how this reasoning is applied.
but it is still commonly thrown around and still considered a useful teaching framework. That’s why you’ll see it referenced online as if it is fresh, new, and applicable - people learn about it every year in college. Also, elements of the framework are probably perfectly sound. It definitely seems to be the case that language shapes brains; it just doesn’t seem to be the case that humans who don’t have specific words for them can’t experience orange, or the future.
(Many things in college are taught using teaching frameworks that may not be, technically, true; the framework is intended to give a critical structure for interpreting information. Then, when we later find evidence that disproves the hypothesis, that single piece of information doesn’t destroy our expensive college education; what we paid for is the framework. This is mostly frustrating in the sciences, when fresh crops of undergraduate students crash around on social media, grappling with their first exposure to (complex concept) and how it’s DIFFERENT to what they learned BEFORE and their teachers LIED TO EVERYBODY and they’re going to save the world from POP SCIENCE by telling the TRUTH. You’ll notice that these TOTALLY NEW INFORMATION reveals map along the semester schedule. The thing here is that getting new information, or information being different from what you were previously told, does not cancel out the fact that you are getting what you pay for - an education. Learning new facts that change our relationships to hypotheses isn’t a ✨huge betrayal ✨ , but the expected process of academia. Anyway.)
You have an interesting response here, and can start by looking at the ways that Sapir-Whorf has been disproved. There will be loads of literature on that.
However, it would be interesting to look at the argument as an unpicking of the other side’s rather weird, ritualistic superstitious belief that a behavior doesn’t exist if the creatures doing it can’t describe it. It is not on the ancient Greeks and Romans to categorise and interpret their behavior for a modern educated audience. They do not have the wherewithal to do so. They are also fucking dead. We can name the behaviors we see, and describe their impacts, however the hell we like.
Sure, the ancient Greeks used “cancer” to refer to lumpy veiny tumors. We can infer that they still had blood cancer, because their medical texts describe leukaemia and their corpses have evidence of it - they just didn’t know it was cancer. But we do, so we can call it cancer. Just because Homer said “the wine-dark sea” in a flight of girlish whimsy doesn’t mean he was unable to distinguish grape juice from saltwater, which we know, because we can observe that he was an intelligent wordsmith perfectly capable of talking about wine and oceans in other contexts. We are the people who get to stand at our point of history with our words, and name things like “this person probably died of leukaemia” and “poets say things that aren’t necessarily literal” and “this behaviour was racist” and “that’s gay” and “togas kinda slay tho” despite Ancient Greeks having different concepts of cancer, wittiness, prejudice, homosexuality, and slaying than we do today.
Now just to caveat that people do get muddled about the concept of racism. Our understanding of racism from here - this point of history, with these words, probably from the West - is heavily influenced by how we see racism around us today: white supremacy and the construct of “whiteness,” European colonial expansion, transatlantic chattel slavery, orientalism, evangelism, 20th century racial science, and so on. This is the picture of racism that really dominates our current discourse, so people often mistake it for the definition of racism. (Perhaps in a linguistic-deterministic sort of way after all.) As a result, muddled-up people often say things like “I can’t be racist because I’m not a white American who throws slurs at black American people,” while being an Indian person in the UK who votes for vile anti-immigration practices, or a Polish person with a horrible attitude about the Roma. Many people genuinely hold this very kindergarten idea of racism; if your opponent does as well, they’re probably thinking something like “Ancient Greek and Roman people didn’t have a concept of white supremacy, because whiteness hadn’t been invented yet, so how could they be racist?” And that’s unsound reasoning in a separate sense.
Racism as the practice of prejudice against an ethnicity, particularly one that is a minority, is a power differential that is perfectly observable in ancient cultures. The beliefs and behaviors will be preserved in written plays, recorded slurs, beauty standards, reactions to foreign marriages, and travel writing. The impacts will be documented in political records, trade agreements, the layouts of historical districts of ancient towns.
You don’t need permission to point out behaviours and impacts. You can point them out in any words you like. You can make up entirely new words to bully the ancient romans with. You are the one at this point of history and your words are the ones that get used.
Pretending that “words” are some kind of an intellect-obscuring magical cloud in the face of actual evidence is just a piece of sophistry (derogatory) on the part of your opponent here. It’s meant to be a distraction. You can dismiss this very flimsy shield pretty quickly and get them in the soft meat of them never reading anything about the actual material topic, while they’re still looking up dictionary definitions or whatever.
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frantic-fiction · 20 hours
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Hi!! I love your astarion stories so much, you are such a talented writer!
I have a bit of a weird request for an 18+.
I've heard theories that if a vampire like astarion drinks enough human blood that there's a slight chance he's able to get someone pregnant 👀 ...
I'm wondering if you could do a smut like something along the lines of astarion having a huge breeding kink, so he and Tav are experimenting with him drinking maybe more than he should of her but it's worth it if they have a chance at having a kid or something? Basically just asking for a smut about astarion having a breeding kink🥺
thank you so much for all you do!! Once again like I said you are so talented, and if you do decide to do something with this I'd love to be in the tag list.
Okay first off, this comment is everything thank you. You are just too nice I can't 🥰....and well I had so much fun writing this so I hope you like it lovely!
I Want 18+
Warnings: SMUT MDNI, Breeding kink, fingering, dry humping, slight daddy kink if you squint, Astarion being lovesick, slight dom/sub maybe? idk
Word Count: 2.5k of pure filth
Mastarlist
It started with a chapter in an obnoxiously repetitive book about vampires and their spawns. You had gifted it to him with a poorly concealed giggle on your lips. 
Most of the content was either incorrect or exaggerated, and Astarion couldn't help but chuckle at the foolishness of it all. He was ready to throw the damned thing into the fireplace when his eye drifted over a passage.
Dhampirs: Creatures born from the union of a human and a vampire. The conception is incredibly rare, but the likelihood increases if the vampire indulges in a significant amount of the human's blood prior to sex. 
Now, it can't seem to leave Astarion's mind. The idea of you being pregnant, being able to watch your stomach swell with his child, witnessing your breast grow and your hips fill out. How sensitive would you get as your pregnancy progresses? Would you crave him more than you do now? These thoughts alone have him throbbing in his trousers.
However, what sealed Astarion's fate was seeing you with Gale's newborn baby girl. The way love filled your heart the moment your eyes landed on that little girl sleeping soundly in the wizard's arms. How delicate you cradle the young one's head as soon as she's in your grasp, softly cooing down at the little bundle, stroking the smooth pink skin of her cheek. 
And when you turned to him with that sweet smile that never fails to make Astarion weak in the knees, asking if he wishes to hold baby Dekarios. How could he say no? 
Astarion never cared for fatherhood, but the moment that baby girl was in his arms, opening her eyes with that dopey, toothless smile, he was done for. And when she grabbed his pointer finger with her tiny hand, gripping it lightly with all her strength. Astarion knew he wouldn't stop trying until you were carrying his child.
You were finishing up the dishes, hips swaying to a tune only you could hear. The summer heat had you in shorts that fell just below the swell of your rear and a sheer top that revealed your lack of a bra. It's been a week since the visit to the Dekarios, and Astarion can no longer hold back the desires that burn deep in his body. 
Astarion approaches silently, a predator stalking his prey. You rub your nose on your shoulder, trying to scratch an itch while your hands are covered in suds, groaning in annoyance when that fails to help. 
Gods, you're adorable. 
You're so carefree and relaxed, looking so soft, warm, and delicate. All open to his wandering hands and his greedy mouth. Astarion can already feel himself stiffen just from the knowledge of what he has in store for you.
A startled scream leaves your lips as Astarion's cold arms snake around your waist and pulls you against his hard chest. It does make him feel bad for a moment, but the delicate sigh that follows as he kisses up your jaw is enough to make up for it. 
"Hello, my love." Astarion hums against your skin. His nimble fingers trail over your stomach, teasing the valley of your breast, taking careful movements to ghost his thumb over your sensitive nipple. A gasp leaves your sinful mouth, and you arch your back.
"H-hey," you breathe, and when Astarion grinds his tented pants against your backsides, you let out the most delicious whimper. "What are you up to, Star?" 
His only response is a breathy laugh as he turns you around and pulls you into a kiss. Signing into his mouth, you hook your arms around his neck and deepen the kiss. It's messy, with soapy hands and mingling tongues, but it leaves you breathless. Astarion teases your bottom lip with his teeth before pulling away to bite your jaw playfully, relishing the surprised yelp you give him. 
Astarion quickly lifts you onto the countertop, where he can nestle between your plush thighs. Your wandering hands move up to tangle into his curls and give a tug. Astarion obliges your silent request and resumes the kiss, licking deeply into your mouth. He's lost in the subtle floral scent of your shampoo and the taste of your lips.
You pull him away with your chest, heaving in deep pants. "Astarion, what are you--" He smirks when you trail off into a breathy moan as his teeth nibble at your ear.
"Darling, do you remember that book you gifted me?" Astarion's hands trail down your side, and you part your legs more for his reaching fingers.
"Y-yes, the one you scoffed at and threw in the corner?" Still having the sense of mind to tease him, he chuckles when your quip spills into a moan when the pad of his thumb presses against your covered clit. 
Astarion is pleased with the dampening fabric of your shorts. Your responsiveness never ceases to leave him aching with need. He begins to move his finger lightly back and forth against the fabric. It's not enough to give you what you want, but it has you whining for more.
"Well, I must admit the poor excuse for educational text did have some interesting information." Astarion moves his thumb a bit rougher against your clit.
"What -fuck- what interesting information are we talking about?" 
Astarion doesn't respond immediately, slipping his hand under the band of your shorts. He swipes his deft fingers through your dripping folds and begins to tease your entrance while he continues to rub tight circles against your sensitive bud. You gasp and drop your head to his shoulder, rolling your hips into his palm. Astarion cups the back of your neck with his spare hand and tilts your head back. You meet his heated gaze with lidded eyes and mouth agape. 
"Dhampirs." Astarion purrs, plunging two of his fingers into your dripping core, curling up just enough to have you gasping his name. 
Your fingernails dig into his forearm, clinging for anything to ground you. Astarion waits for you to react, loving the way you roll your hips in time with his fingers, desperate for all that he gives you. It seems you're lost in your pleasure or not quite catching on to what he's implying because you're looking at him, clearly not following his words. 
"Half-vampires, my sweet."
You clench around his fingers, letting out a soft whimper that would have gone unheard without his heightened hearing. He smirks, picking up the pace. Astarion grabs your chin, guiding you to look at him.
"Does that excite you, darling?" 
"Gods, shit," You breathe. "Please, don't stop."
"You would look so beautiful carrying our child. Hells, imagine." 
Astarion trails his fangs over the skin of your neck, sucking on the pinprick from the previous night. His hips are now rutting against your leg and the edge of the counter, only enough to ease the ache in his groin. Astarion can feel you getting close just by the little jolts of your hips and the tight squeeze of your cunt. 
"Do you want my child, love?" Astarion hums against your skin. "Do you want me to fill you to the brim with my seed, fuck you until you're a dripping mess? Until there's a little one growing in your womb."
"Please! Fuck, I'm going t-" 
"Come for me, my sweet girl."
You cry out his name, and just as your orgasm rakes through your body, Astarion sinks his teeth into your neck and begins his feed. You're lost to the pleasure, your walls spasming around his fingers. He helps you ride out your release, never unlatching from your neck.
 Astarion takes large, greedy gulps of your blood, far more than his usual fill. The book said a significant amount of blood was needed, leaving much to be interpreted. Astarion only stopped when you nudged him on the shoulder. 
When he pulls away, you wipe the small trickle of blood that dribbles down Astarion's chin. Delicately he grabs your hand and sucks your thumb into his mouth, licking it clean.
"Astarion, let's go to our room. I think we have some things to explore," you say with a tempting smile.
Astarion is carrying you out of the kitchen and down the hall without another word, his lips locked onto yours. 
You're giggling against Astarion's mouth as he kicks the door open and tosses you carelessly on the bed. You bounce on the mattress and watch the vampire hastily tear at the buttons of his shirt. 
Tossing the fabric away, Astarion looks at you and unbuckles his trousers. The sight alone nearly has him cumming in his pants. There you are, lounging with that devious gaze, biting your lip and groping your breast like the tease you are.
"Fuck, sweetheart," Astarion breathe, practically ripping the rest of his clothes from his body. "Take your clothes off for me."
You do as you're told and quickly strip until you're bare and spread out like a feast just for him. Astarion now kneels naked at the foot of the bed and grabs your ankle, giving a gentle kiss to your calf. 
"I've thought about nothing else but getting you pregnant since I read that foolish book," Astarion says, kissing his way up your leg. "Watching your stomach grow round with our child," He kisses and licks the soft flesh of your abdomen. 
"Astarion," you sigh.
"To get the pleasure of taking care of you. Rubbing your swollen feet, and massage your aching back, even fetching every one of the disgusting cravings your pregnancy gives you."
"Says the blood drinker." You scoff, glaring down at Astarion between the valley of your breasts. 
Astarion ignores you and bites at your chest playfully. "You would make such a lovely mother, darling. Please, love, let me make you a mother." 
Astarion's words are laced with a tone of desperation. He might have been embarrassed if not for the need that consumes him: a need to see you nod at him with your beautiful smile, a need to hear you say you want this just as much as him, that you want to start a family with him, however unlikely it might be.
And then you nod your head and frantically pull him up into a kiss, and Astarion feels like he's alive once again.
"Gods, yes." You mumble, slinging your legs around him and pulling him down against your body.
Astarion licks into your mouth, kissing you like a man starved. You're just as desperate, grinding up against him, seeking friction, and letting out little whines against his mouth. Wandering hands trails down his back and between your two bodies, and Astarion lets out a pathetic moan when you grip his leaking cock, giving him a few teasing pumps. 
"You're going to be such a good daddy, Astarion." You whisper sinfully in his ears as he fucks your hand. "Going to take good care of me and our little one."
"Hells, you wicked thing." Astarion grunts. 
You run your thumb over the head, giving him a playful squeeze. Hot, open-mouth kisses are littered across his chest and up his neck until your mouth is right against his ear. Your warm breath floats over his skin, sending a shiver down his spine.
"Astarion love, I need you to put a baby into me." 
Astarion nods, seemingly breathless, as you line him up at your weeping cunt. He presses in, and the room fills with debauched moans. You grab his neck, slamming your mouths back together, tongues back into their messy dance. Saliva coats each other's lips, but neither can get enough. Astarion grunts deep in his chest when you scratch your nails over his scalp.
"Oh my love, I'm going to fuck you until you're leaking with my cum. Filled to the brim until you can't take anymore." Astarion grabs your legs and pulls them over his shoulders, and you cry at the change in angle. "Then tomorrow I'll do the same, and the day after. Until we know for sure our baby is growing in your womb."
"Yes, Star. Wanna baby." You slur against him, pressing warm kisses wherever your lips can touch. 
Astarion was fucking you as if this was his life goal. As if nothing else matters but the delicious feeling of his cock thrusting against your walls, pressing deep against your cervix. Seeing all of you with your cheek flushed and your chest rising and falling with rapid pants of breath, knees against your chest. Your eyes lidded, gazed over in pleasure, and your hair a mess against the white of the pillow. It was the sexiest display Astarion has ever had the pleasure to see.
"You're so beautiful. Gods, I love you." 
"Love you," You try to say but choke on a moan. Your hands wander down his back and across his chest, seeming not to know where you want to touch.
Astarion is close but determined to feel you come around him before finding his release. Thankfully, he won't need to wait long because you're on the edge. So close. He can tell just by the way your gummy walls spasm around his cock, and the way your hips are jutting up against each of his thrusts.
"I know you're close, darling. Can you come for me? I want to feel you squeeze me while I fill you."
And with those sinful words, it was almost like you were waiting for his permission because as soon as they left his mouth, you were falling over the precipice. You clench down on him, a pleasured sob breaking free of your throat. The feeling of you alone was enough to tip him over, and he quickly found his release spilling his seed deep into your abused cunt.
The room stills, the scent of sweat and sex clings to the air. Astarion lets your legs fall to the side and maneuvers both of your bodies so that he's lying on his back and you're resting on top of him, head on his chest. Astarion rubs your back and kisses your hairline as you catch your breath. You trace lines across his skin, lost in thought at what had happened.
"So should I expect a little vampling running around soon?" you ask, looking up at him.
Astarion huffs a small laugh through his nose and kisses your forehead. "Human and Vampire reproduction is unlikely but not impossible," Astarion explains without the rush of arousal clogging both of your minds. "But I think we've done many remarkable things together, wouldn't you agree, my love."
You smile brightly and kiss his chest. "Yes, we do have a knack for doing the impossible. And I'm very, very eager to keep trying." 
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s1m0nth3swag · 1 day
Text
Francis Mosses x GN!Reader
AUTHORS NOTE; Haven't written in a while, but thanks to Arlo, a friend (Hi Arlo, I know you're reading this), Inspiration about Francis Mosses struck (he bought me That's not my neighbor and then continued to freak out about Francis with me) so I wrote this. I have so many thoughts about Francis, so... tell me if you want more because i will deliver ngl. Enjoy (or don't, I don't dictate your feelings)
WARNINGS/ CONTENT INFO; Porn with little to no plot, Submissive Francis, a little non-consensual at the start (but not in a super weird way, imo?), Gender neutral reader (no pronouns used, tried to write as GN as possible with the compliments and thoughts about Readers appearance), not proofread nor have I thought about this much, more a drabble than an actual thoughtful story (not apologising because I had such a long break from writing anything and obviously it's gonna suck a little when I come back)
NSFW UNDER THE CUT!
The first time Francis had realised that he hadn't gotten any touch from another human being was when someone brushed up against him on his way home from work. He had felt like a creep afterwards because he hadn't stopped thinking about what could've happened if the person hadn't moved away and had just stayed pressed against him. That was a week before you started your job as a doorman.
The second time Francis had noticed was when a friend of his had spoken to him on the phone, talking about his new girlfriend. Said friend gave too much intel on their sex life. Francis had wondered if he could have someone the way his friend explained - he quickly brushed the thought off. That was two days before you started working as a doorman.
The third time, he noticed when you had smiled at him. It was your first day, and he was tired from work. You had repeated his name after reading it off of his ID, and he had looked at you for the first time since his eyes kept falling closed, and you smiled so brightly. You had told him his name was nice, and you said it again. Francis swore that the way his name rolled off your tongue was the most beautiful thing he's ever heard. Not even an angel could sound more wonderful. Suddenly, he was a lot more energised. Totally not thanks to the fact that he had immediately grown hard the second he had seen your smile. He had gone to his apartment that night and had jerked off for the first time in probably months. He had always been too tired to previously, but now he couldn't stop thinking about how you'd sound moaning his name. Maybe you were more of a groaner, or you'd whimper and whine. He came as he imagined how you'd look sucking his dick.
Since then, Francis has always looked forward to entry checks. What had normally kept him away from his bed and a good night's sleep was now the best experience of his day. He loved the way you spoke to him even though he was too nervous to respond. Sometimes, he deliberately didn't show his ID at first, just so you'd ask about it, and he could listen to you talk a little more. He felt guilty about it. He knew you had never agreed to feed into this weird little obsession of his. It was awful of him to do this - have you talk to him enough to give him more scenarios to think about that night.
A few weeks after all this had started, Francis had built up the courage to finally ask you out. Just something simple, dinner at his place. He had to cook for himself all the time. Cooking for you as well wouldn't be too different, right?
Francis was wrong. He was anxious that the food wouldn't taste good and kept tasting it just so he could make sure it hadn't mysteriously switched tastes in the last 20 seconds. When you knocked on his door, he took a minute to make sure he didn't look like a mess - though you wouldn't mind either way since he always looked like a mess when he came through during your shifts.
You looked so good when he opened the door. Your hair fell perfectly, your lips looked a little too kissable, and Francis had to stop his train of thought just so he wouldn't embarrass himself by having yet another boner caused by just the way you looked. You were a little shorter than him, smiling up as he let you inside.
"You look good." He mumbled, his cheeks flushing. He seriously had to lay off thinking like a high-schooler. His nervousness and awkwardness were getting really annoying - to him, at least. You grinned, chuckling softly as you took off your shoes. "Thank you. You do as well." His heart for sure burst at that - he knew something else would burst as well if he didn't stop thinking right this second.
Throughout the evening, ignoring his thoughts came easier and easier. The two of you had eaten, you had told him he was a good cook, he had almost excused himself to the bathroom because of it. Now you were sitting on the couch, drinking wine and talking casually.
"You know, when you first walked through, I swore I would die." You giggled, looking at him with a mischievous look. Francis was confused by that statement. "How come?" He asked, tilting his head at you in question. "I was sure you were a doppelganger. You looked too handsome to be real." You cheekily answered, cheeks slightly flushed as you downed your wine. Francis blushed heavily, looked away from you, and thought about your words for a moment. The silence was loud as he wondered what to answer. "..you think I'm handsome?" He questioned while looking at the floor. If he had looked at you, he'd have seen the way you stared at him, your own cheeks coloured a deep red. "Extremely." You muttered. It took him a minute before he could look at you, but when he did, his lips pressed against yours in a desperate kiss.
When you reciprocated, Francis groaned and pulled you closer until you sat on his lap. He was just a tiny bit embarrassed when you gasped and felt his dick press against you. In all honesty, he had held back the entire night, and he was allowed a little selfishness. "Sorry. Can't help it." He muttered between kisses. You just grinned against his lips before grinding against him. A whimper fell from his lips - that was the moment he was actually embarrassed. "That's cute.." You had mumbled, a cheeky grin on your face as you started placing kisses against his jaw and neck. One of your hands trailed down his body to rest right over his crotch, Francis unconsciously bucked his hips up against your hand, whining. He didn't notice anything else as you caught the skin of his neck with your teeth carefully, leaving the softest bite mark on him. He shuddered at the feeling and gasped before realising that you had meanwhile unzipped his pants. A groan slipped from his lips as you ran a finger over his dick, still hidden from sight by his boxers, but god knows he would cum the second you'd touch it without. "Is this okay?" You asked him, and he nodded faster than he even knew he could. "Yes. God, yes. Please, please continue.." he muttered, his breathing heavy as he watched you slide off his lap, settling in front of him and between his legs. His dick twitched at the sight, and he let out a heavy sigh. Minutes later, his pants and boxers were discarded, and the way you looked up at him, his dick so close to your face, made Francis feel the way his orgasm was approaching way too quick. The second you wrapped your hand around him he whined pathetically, bucked up into your hand and knew that he'd definitely cum too soon. Your hand was so soft, cool against his hot flesh, and you worked his dick so good he almost thought you were a professional. He looked down at you through lidded eyes, watched the way you bit your lip, and grinned knowingly. "Such a pretty boy, huh?" You chuckled, and that definitely sealed the deal for Francis. He came, probably ruining his shirt as he dirtied both it and your hand. His heart stopped for a second when you licked your hand while looking up at him. "You didn't give me enough time to taste you properly. Don't look at me like that." You huffed, rolling your eyes at him. "You should probably take off your shirt so you can clean it later." You then winked. He swiftly shed the piece of clothing, entranced by your voice and the way you looked. "Sorry, didn't mean to cum that fast.." he mutters, his voice out of breath. "Jus'.. unused to... this.." he added, clearing his throat awkwardly. You laughed and shook your head. "Don't worry about it. We have all the time in the world to make you last longer. I'm gonna give you a real reason to be tired tomorrow." You winked.
Francis didn't even mind that he was in for a long night.
Your honour I am gnawing at the bars of my enclosure.
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sciderman · 2 hours
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I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain
Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it
i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)
really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!
undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.
i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.
people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.
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peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.
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it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."
so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.
people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.
autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.
#a lot of my traits have been exacerbated lately and i remember it was much easier for me before#and some of my friends have said “oh it's because you've been masking too long and now you're facing autistic burnout.”#and that made sense to me i think.#but then i found out about the stress thing. me overproducing stress hormone. and that's a very physical thing.#and that explains why i've been overstimulated more than usual lately. and why everything feels like too much.#and i wonder how many of these traits of mine are going to subside once i have lamar removed#and it makes me wonder a lot of things. and it's so weird how much your brain is tied to your biology.#i wonder how much i'll change. i wonder how i'll feel. i wonder if i'll still feel like me. i wonder how much me is me right now.#and how much of me is being altered by weird freaky hormones. who am i?? who will i be??#i'm almost looking at this as like. a superhero origin story of some sort. like this is my spider-bite moment. maybe.#will i be different? will i cope with things differently?? now that my body isn't fighting something anymore??#maybe i'll be normal. i don't know. i don't know.#i don't know what it'll mean for me.#but all of these things mean i relate to peter parker in a certain kind of way#i don't think you have to be diagnosed with autism to recognise and empathise with those traits i think#i think everyone can see themselves in peter. and i think that's the benefit of having characters that aren't diagnosed.#because there's so much overlap in the human experience. and certain feelings aren't exclusive to just one group of people.#peter has such a rich identity actually. it's an autistic thing. it's a queer thing. it's a jewish thing. it's a trauma thing.#there are so many overlapping parts of peter's identity that inform who he is and how he behaves and it's never just one thing.#it's a product of all of his things.#just like me! just like everyone.#so me? i guess i can be a million things. you can explain what i am in a million different ways.#a hundred different psychologists can all come up with different ways to explain why i be the way i be.#i don't think it's something that can be simplified.#sorry wow. i'm really going off here in the tags.#i hope people don't think i'm stupid. i don't know brain science. i'm just philosophising as usual.#sci speaks
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ik u have a big ask load still but wanted to point out: a lot of singlets have unhealthy relationships with themself, and I wonder if they could improve their life so much by treating themself like they were their spouse? Like would they attempt to fix any eating disorders they might have gotten? would they properly rest? Would them treating themself like how system with insys relationships do help them improve their life?
While I don't know if singlets treating themselves like their own spouses specifically would improve their quality of life, numerous people have found their quality of life has improved after treating themselves like multiple people, or like how headmates treat each other (in systems that get along, of course).
For instance, some singlets may be more motivated to take care of themselves if they see self-care as doing something for their future self. Or, by imagining one's emotions as a separate entity they must help or cooperate with (for example, anxiety as a skittish horse that needs to be gently walked through whatever is causing it distress), a person may be better able to handle their emotions. Personally, we find humanizing our worries and fears to be a great help in understanding and resolving them; by listening to our fear like we would a scared headmate, we are able to identify what is causing this distress and take steps to resolve it. I've always seen this as a plural-adjacent approach to self-care, and I've heard many tales of it improving one's life.
On that note, while running this blog over the years, I've received many submissions about posts that describe very plural-adjacent experiences that led to the poster taking care of themself. Have you noticed that I've gotten a lot of submissions lately about people eating better because they imagine characters from Dungeon Meshi telling them to eat well? That's just one example of this type of post that I get! It's not uncommon for people to take care of themselves because they imagine or visualize people or characters (or religious figures, in some cases) they admire telling them to do so, which is rather reminiscent of healthy intrasystem relationships, don't you think (especially ones with introjects in the mix)?
If you're looking in more clinical settings and are open to parallels that are less clear than the above examples, some therapeutic practices approach patients from the angle that every person is made up of multiple parts, and that treating each part of oneself with understanding will improve one's quality of life. IFS, or Internal Family Systems, is the most overt example of this, but it's also discussed in other circles; it's not a new idea in psychology that the mind has many parts that all work together, and that treating a patient requires treating, or at least acknowledging, each part of their mind. In some cases, these circles/practices help and encourage the patient themself to acknowledge and treat each part of their mind. You could find parallels in these therapeutic and psychiatric treatments to singlets "treating themself like they were their own spouse". However, I feel this may be drifting from the topic a bit.
I do think many singlets would benefit from practicing a form of "soft" functional plurality along these lines, by accepting their multitudes, multifacetedness, and complexity, and taking advantage of their ability to personify things to lend themselves some kindness. Hell, we thank our body for working hard to keep us alive, and that helps us have a better relationship with it! So, yes, I do think singlets treating themselves like their own spouse – or rather, as a separate, if connected, person they wish to do good to and for – would help them in many aspects.
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ckret2 · 2 days
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Follow up on Bill gender: Bill and Mable's gender conversation implied that one could have a number-of-sides identity which might not be reflected by your... assigned shape? This analogy is breaking down. To the question: Do you think that was true in his real life home dimension, or just something he was chill about on a whim? Will it ever come up in the fic?
Yeah, there were trans shapes. Bill is one of them! Like I'm calling him "triangle" for simplicity but really it's pyramid which is like 4/5 triangle and 1/5 square simultaneously in a higher-dimensional way, but like also he's been calling himself a spherical triangle for literally a trillion years and he's still kinda loyal to that identity because he's only been thinking of himself as a pyramid for 4000-odd years, and spherical triangle captures some of the experience of being 2D in a 3D way but not all of the experience and it leaves out the squareness so pyramid's more accurate but "pyramid" doesn't reflect the whole "grew up with psychic powers" experience and Bill thinks being psychic is an important part of his gender identity still so like he's wondering whether fourth-dimensional hyperspherical pyramid is the best fit, but he doesn't FEEL 4D, he feels 2D in a 3D way—you know what, you know what, it's complicated, you're just a human, you can call him a triangle, it's fine, it's close enough, really, he's somewhere under the triangle umbrella, it's fine, don't worry about it, really don't worry about it, it's cool, he's cool with it.
Hectorgon decided somewhere along the way that he didn't feel like a 2D hexagon anymore and got some work done and is a 3D hexagonal prism now and is content with it. Amorphous Shape has stuff going on with them Bill can't even beGIN to make sense of but sometimes they look like a bunch of squares and sometimes they look like a bunch of other polygons and everyone just nods and goes with it, and tbh naming yourself Amorphous Shape is sort of like renaming yourself Genderfluid Human and then all your friends nickname you Derf. Bill's dad was intersex in one direction and picked up a trans-ish gender presentation in a totally different direction. As a child Bill met another spherical shape that looked like a line in the second dimension but in the third dimension was a polygon—a biangle—struggling to get that recognized as an actual sex.
And all this is like, the shape equivalent of having a gender that can't be described with anything less than five terms and a freshly-baked set of new neopronouns. There were also more conventional trans identities—assigned squares who wanted to be seen as lines, triangles who wanted to be seen as pentagons, hexagons that were sometimes hexagons and sometimes octagons, septagons that felt sideless, etc.
Bill's stance on all this since he was equivalent-to-a-teen has been Anybody Can Do Anything They Want Forever.
He got in fights with his dad about whether including biangles when greeting his audiences—"Welcome, lines, bis, and tris; quads, quints, and more"—would alienate the Traditional Members Of The Audience.
I don't know how much of all of the above will ever actually make it into the fic aside from discussing biangles.
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blanketforcas · 2 days
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idk how to articulate this but. i feel like we all agree cas knows dean loves him when he's confessing, but i always struggle with "the one thing i want is something i know i can't have" being tied to his deal with the empty, cause he's been "wondering what it could be" since he "took that curse", so it must be something that was already true before that deal was made.
so that leads viewers to the conclusion of "well the one thing he wants is simply dean, and cas doesn't think he reciprocates in that way (romantically), even though he clearly does" cause that's a popular trope on TV. and that doesn't necessarily take away from cas' character or character development imo, cause he does have doubts sometimes and he is still figuring out humanity even though he himself is very human and has a good grasp on it at this point. so it makes sense for him to doubt if he interpreted all the signs correctly, both because of his lack of (validating) experience in that area and because things have been complicated between them, so maybe coming to a wrong conclusion in the end isn't the wildest thing cas could do.
that doesn't mean i love that interpretation, but i think that it's the interpretation that makes the most sense for the general audience to conclude. and i think that was on purpose, so that wb/tptp didn't have to make a statement on dean's sexuality. i love that it makes cas' confession even more undeniably romantic, but it comes at the price of dean's ability to speak.
i wish it wasn't written like that and i wish it was made clear that cas knows dean loves him Like That, but that the deal means they can't have it. but it was all left a bit too open to interpretation cause that was the trade-off. bobo had to work with what he had and i think he did all he could. and misha saying they were scared they were gonna edit out the confession and having to be super careful about it all the time, just proves that. so in the end we got a confession that was still beautiful despite all the restrictions and weird last-minute edits, one that was expertly crafted to convey the importance and emotionality it needed, but one that did suffer from ✨ network censorship ✨ unfortunately
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yellowhollyhock · 2 days
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lonely holiday
SAINW Raph
Twenty-two degrees. Sliver moon. About 8pm.
Raph crouched next to April's porch, watching the snow fall.
He'd only realized a couple hours ago that it was December 25.
It had always been a bit weird to him, anyway, that they celebrated Christmas. Mikey and Donnie saw it on tv, and Splinter was eager enough for them to experience some kind of culture, he'd always done what he could to make it special for them. Then when they made friends with the Professor, and through him made acquaintances with other humans in their neighborhood, they'd noticed the stark contrast between Christmas for the wealthy... and Christmas for people like them.
It had never been their holiday. Just scraps they borrowed from the loudest of the humans. Why should he still feel obligated to stop by?
Soft light and quiet voices drifted through the window. It sounded like Mikey was telling a story. Anything to keep his mind off recent events. Mikey had always been that way.
Raph sighed, finally giving up on the idea of knocking. If he'd been sitting here this long, it wasn't gonna happen. He shifted, getting ready to toss three small packaged onto the porch.
Before he did, he heard a soft thud. Then two more, softer. He peeked over the edge of the porch--and found three packages.
Then a turtle dropped down behind them.
Raph felt himself deflate. He could wait for him to leave, but if he did he'd just be angry at himself all week, wondering why he didn't reach out, to try to talk, to punch him square in the snout, maybe cry together. Maybe even make things right.
But probably not.
"Hey," he hopped onto the porch, his voice stopping Leo before he could knock. "What are you doing here?"
Leo's eyes widened. "Raph, I--" then his expression hardened. "I was just checking on Mikey. What are you doing here?"
Raph placed his packages down next to Leo. "Just dropping something off."
They glared at each other over top of the messily wrapped gifts, neither acknowledging how they'd clearly not included each other.
Then the door swung open. Casey's laughter petered off as he took in the tense situation right outside his front door.
"Hey guys," he greeted calmly. "Whatcha standing out in the cold for? You should come in. We just had dinner; want us to make you a plate?"
Leo kept his eyes on Raph, waiting for him to make the first move.
He kept doing that. Raph hated it. Leo was always one who watched for his enemies to make the first move, wanting to understand the way they would think before he decided how to proceed. If it was that, if they were just enemies now, maybe Raph could handle it.
But he was looking at him the way he used to look at Master Splinter; waiting for a judgment call.
Well, Leo had given up on Master Splinter, and Raph didn't intend to plug any holes for him.
He turned away.
"You guys go in. I got places to be."
It was a bold-faced lie, and he didn't think any of them wouldn't see right through him. He didn't care.
"Come on, Raph. April made way too many mashed potatoes for just three of us."
Raph paused, but only to angle his head up and blink away tears. It was so much like something Don would've said.
He waved a hand at Casey dismissively. "I'll see you guys for New Years."
He walked away and kept walking, knowing Casey and Leo would stand on the porch letting the cold in until he was well and truly gone.
He wasn't gonna let anyone hang around in doorways for him. Leo could have Christmas. Leo could have it all.
Raph was better off alone.
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fearlessdevil17 · 3 days
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I FINALLY HAVE A FAVOURITE HUMAN POKEMON CHARACTER!!!!
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I've been playing Pokemon since probably 2010, and i've never really had a favourite Pokemon character that was human. I mean i do love some characters like Cynthia and Wally, but i just never saw them as my favourites, and it's been like that for years.............UNTIL NOW!!!!
As much as Pokemon Scarlet/Violet has such a wonderful story, as well as fantastic character development. Kieran's arc is the only thing within the game that legit shook me to my core.
Like there were so many thoughts racing through my head after i finished the Teal Mask, and that post ending!!! That gave me serious chills.
I will never forget that battle i had with Kieran when playing the Indigo Disk. That was the most insane and intense Pokemon battle i've ever had in a long time. I legit felt like i was fighting for my life. I haven't been backed into corner like that for years.
What made it worse was that I found out after the battle that, for the first time in Pokemon history, Kieran canonically surpasses Cynthia. And given how she's left tons of players with PTSD, that's a horrifying title to have.
Kieran is more then just your "friendly rival", and i have no idea how to put it in words. One things for certain is that he is nothing like the other rivals in the other games, Kieran was out for blood, specially your blood.
I already considered Pokemon Violet as my favourite Pokemon game of all time, and playing the DLC and the Epilogue, that just deepened the title.
I'm so happy i bought it, and i'm glad Kieran stays our friend at the end too :)
But to think that this timid little bean would become my new worst nightmare lol
Congratulations Kieran, you are now part of my "favourite characters from different fandoms" collection, you've earned it <3
Here's a close up of the sad sona doodle:
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As well a couple of bonus sketches:
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Meanwhile:
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My sister didn't have the same experience when battling Kieran.
We seem to have different battle styles, as you can see here:
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XD
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HAPPY APRIL 1st, i wrote a fic about the suez canal fiasco bc it's still the funniest thing that's ever happened. synopsis is "grumpy gods from different mythologies argue over whose job it is to unstick the goddamn boat"
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squishosaur · 7 months
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hey man. i'm just saying. why would we put inexperienced teenagers with over-inflated egos and obvious emotional issues into combat classes and make them claw their way to the top of their dorms and expect things to just run smoothly. who actually thought this
#the reason rsa doesn't have overblots is because they understand the joy and whimsy of life and friendship btw#LIKE. why is there no school counselor?? do you know how much time & resources & effort & TRAUMA we could have saved the students &#school from if ANYONE had reached out to riddle and was like 'hey are you alright i heard xyz and i wanted to let you know...' ESPECIALLY#since TREY LITERALLY TELLS US 'oh well here's the lowdown on her trauma this is Probably what is causing this'#or if someone sat down to tell leona 'hey! i'm rooting for you in ur magift(?) game! you're my fav player!!' AND LET HIM FEEL NOTICED#or if someone approached azul as an Equal to try to stop his plans. as a friend even. BEYOND A BUSINESS TRANSACTION#or if ANYBODY BUT ESPECIALLY KALIM was like 'jamil i think you should follow your passions and do something you enjoy today!!' or AT LEAST#let him know he was appreciated as a person NOT JUST FOR HIS WORK#'i know you're doing a lot today but i just wanted to thank you for how much Effort you put into this and..' etc etc etc#ERM.. IF ANYONE TREATED VIL LIKE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CELEBRITY??? or even 'hey i loved you in this film i was wondering if we could#do a play together or something..!!' AND LET HER TRY A TYPE OF CHARACTER SHE NEVER GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE. and sing her praises.#if anyone reached out to idia beyond a 'hey the teacher said to come to class'/'get out of your bed and come to our housewarden meeting'#or even. IF ORTHO HIMSELF was like. 'you know it's not your fault... you didn't cause all of this. not really' OR SOMETHING#or if malleus ever got to experience a small firsthand loss AND WAS COMFORTED THROUGH IT. not just quick fix via magic. not replacing. just#GRIEVING SOMETHING??????? and wasn't feared by literally everyone#um. maybe the real twisted part is that all of this tragedy was easily preventable if we had a support system in place.#but idk. twst is a highschool. there's no support in real high school either. i'd probably overblot too if i could ajdjrjfinfdndjd#twst#chatter#LONG RAMBLE SORRY#yes overblots are essential to the plot. but also. do you know how frustrating it is watching the blot build up and sitting in silence.#I'M SORRY IK IF SOMETHING LIKE THIS WAS HAPPENING TO A GUY I JUST MET I WOULD PROBABLY NOT NOTICE.. but of it was my Friend or Housewarden..#I'D ASK BRO.... I'D ASK ... UGHHHHHUUUHHHH#not that anyone would notice if *I* was about to lose it tbh#speaks volumes about our society o think#OKAY NOW I'M DONE FOR REAL
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themthistles · 11 months
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i think that while micro labels can seem useful and affirming ultimately they're isolating and kind of an obstacle to your understanding of self. that's because you can never find a word specific enough. there will never be a label or two labels or even ten, twenty of them to perfectly capture and describe all of your thoughts, feelings, experiences, preferences, needs, interests, identities, etc. because you learn more and more about yourself every day and then you change and your wants and needs change with you. having to hop between labels, fearing that you don't 'fit' into a label anymore (both in your own and others eyes), worrying how soon your current label will wear out, questioning if you'll ever fully fit a single one. all that causes a lot of uncertainty and anxiety which could be avoided by just picking a more general thing and molding it according to what it means to YOU. because words will always mean different things to different people, you will never be understood immediately and maybe never completely by anyone but yourself and that's fine
#another thing is that micro labels often feel like they fracture the community unnecessarily#idk how many times i've seen fighting over hyperspecific ace labels and what they mean and if people described in them even belong#and honestly i think this discourse wouldn't be so vile and neverending if people accepted the idea of falling under general umbrella#and accepted that you can't describe complicated weird and wonderful act of human existence with a couple of words#you don't need to explain yourself to anyone#i know in our present pronouns/sexuality/gender in bio carrd era it feels like you have to but you really don't#people aren't entitled to a short summary of your inner world and you can't speed run connection#also feel the need to say: i have nothing against people who use micro labels#if you feel like your micro label describes you perfectly? i'm really glad and happy for you#i'm just expressing my own thoughts and feelings that come from personal experience with exploring these things#at some point i started doubting if i could call myself a lesbian#i thought oh i'm not exactly what a lot of people generally think of when they hear that word#oh they'll misunderstand and i'm not being my 'true self' i'll find a word that fits me exactly if i just keep looking#and then i found out being aroace is a thing and boy did that add a lot of anxiety and confusion to the pot#i didn't feel like i fit in with both communities wasn't lesbian enough wasn't aroace enough#but at some point i just got tired of trying to justify myself to others and to myself#identities aren't houses you live in they're more like seas or rivers flowing into one another#and spaces where they intersect are vague and hard to define and they shift and change and this metaphor is getting away from me#basically#words are complicated#but they're the only direct way we humans can communicate#it is what it is#so make art#a lot of it#oh also unrelated but if you ever tell older queer folks that they're using wrong words to describe themselves i am going to jump you
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casualavocados · 6 months
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caught some (upside-down) reflections of the ring of fire eclipse in my camera, including a moment of totality!
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sysig · 2 months
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You learn to live with it, learn to love it if you can (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#ZEX#Dexter Favin#I 👏 want 👏 ZEX 👏 to be 👏 happy!! 👏#I want him to be hale and hearty and living his best life!! I want him alive and well!!#Professional Take-ZEX-Out-of-Situations-er* *(Not actually paid to do this I just feel very strongly about my volunteer work)#Lol#To do with my love towards Max as well? I'll never tell (yes)#Thinking about a ZEX that managed to get back up on his feet with Dex et al's help and start to make a life for himself#Gets into human fashion and goes back to school and makes friends and kisses people <3 It makes me happy#It's not a complete blank slate-start over but if he was able to come out from under everything - persevere - I'd like to see what he'd be ♥#It's also enjoyable to think about his rise out of pain into something neutral - and then from neutrality to something positive#Going from constantly being afraid and isolated and sad and lonely to a kind of passive disinterest#Very much the stages of grief#Coming up into acceptance - I wonder how isolated he would feel from his life as Admiral ZEX :(#Moments where he's still very far away. Our scars never really leave us they just fade little by little#And some things that he'll never get to experience as a human like depth perception and parallax haha#But still <3 Growing into what Max never had the chance to be ;;#Still not making his parents ''proud'' or whatever |P Dex just happy he's showing initiative and y'know - interest in existence#I do like the idea that he still calls him DAX - the one thing he can't give up completely - but it becomes something like an inside joke#A painful one but a kind of wink and a nod that they both Know#Things will never be the same but they're both taking each day as they come - together#Hhhhh even just little bits of happiness ;; I just want them to be A Little happy
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cienie-isengardu · 1 year
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I don't want you to get upset," Vau said, "but Fi's not as you remember him." Etain nodded gravely as they waited for Aay'han to land. Vau wasn't sure if an emotional shock was a good idea for a pregnant woman so close to term, but he had Rav Bralor here if any of that female stuff needed attending to. Mird followed Etain around, staring fascinated at her belly. "He's still Fi, and I think I understand post-coma recovery now," Etain said. "You have no idea how much medical literature I've read recently. But Mird's worrying me." Bralor flicked her thumbnail against the butt of her blaster, making Mird whip its head around to stare balefully at her. "And I can worry Mird. Can't I, my little stinkweed?" Vau felt the need to defend his comrade. "Strills have very acute senses, remember. It knows the baby's coming soon." "As in snack opportunity?" "As in parenting, Rav. Mird is hermaphroditic, remember. It's capable of being a mother, too, and you know how female animals will mother anything." "Even you, Walon ..."
Republic Commando: True Colors
#star wars#republic commando#etain tur mukan#mird#walon vau#rav bralor#OKAY LISTEN BOTH KAL AND VAU HAS SHITTY TAKE ON PREGNANCY AND PUTTING ALL FEMALE PROBLEMS ON RAV#BUT VAU IS STILL BETTER IN THE SENSE HE PRESUMBLY HAS ZERO EXPERIENCES IN THAT MATTER (no children no wife etc)#AND HE IS STILL BETTER THAN SKIRATA'S PREGNANT WOMEN ARE CRANKY SHIT WHEN HE GOT INFO THAT ETAIN ALMOST LOST UNBORN KID#i mean vau worrying that emotional shock may not be the best for etain right now and be glad to have rav around so there will be#at least one person knowing what to do is quite a lot for a man that has zero reasons to care (etain is jedi and kid is her and darman#so vau doesn't need be involved but he is still worrying about her)#like it is clear he is out of his depth when it comes to the female stuff (lol)#but he is clearly trying to be nice and supportive to etain#but also rav#RAV's sass and the even you walon#haha but we know the truth vau is mothering the strill XD#but also i wonder#if strills have this strong need to mother babies - even human babies#shouldn't mird be very protective of small clone cadets?#which make me wonder more why mird would attack ordo on vau's order like it happened according to triple zero?#unless ordo was much older but then if mird mother lil clones would strill see them differently than its own pack?#like i'm kinda furious this thing about strills come in true colors when triple zero was putting vau and mird in such abusive (cruel) act#against ordo / clone#gimme protective mird mothering lil delta squad and atin good damn
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eyes-like-the-night · 9 months
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I feel like it’s that joy for life and experiencing things that Krolock has seen fade in each and every other vampire, including himself, and it hurts each time to see people damned to just dragging themselves through year after year and at some point you stop really noticing the changes and it all gets monotonous. If it wasn’t for Herbert Krolock probably would have become the same way, just as miserable with his existence as all the vampires in the graveyard.
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