#his ig is only filled with a few photos of

[piss-pumpkin]

Swords and Skeletons (Percy Jackson x reader)

Child of Hades Reader, ~3.7k words, set ambiguously after Nico turns emo, and before HoO ig

People said Camp Half Blood would be different. They called it a place where demigods could be free, safe, make friends, be normal for a change, and train to survive in the real world. A few of those were true, you found. There was training, arenas with swords, ranges with bows, and all that. But not once after arriving were you ever made to feel normal. Apparently, children of Hades were treated differently. 

From the moment the three headed dog of the underworld appeared above your head, the others looked at you less like a comrade, peer, or even friend, and more like an omen. You raise the dead one time at camp and people fall into hysterics. If they only knew the shit you were doing before camp. 

You went to the beach, all the canoes were full, all spoken for, no room for you. You grimaced as you walked away. Sure, that may as well happen. The summer had just started and you already claimed your status as an outsiders 

When you walked by the strawberry fields, the gardeners shot you odd looks, the bravest of which were as bold as to say you’d probably end up killing the plants. Like they didn’t know your dad was married to one of the plant and spring goddesses. Sure, why not?

Your first day claimed at Camp Half Blood was proving less than enjoyable. Just yesterday, with some Hermes kid giving you a tour, you were able to learn a few names, have a little fun. Now? Left alone to figure things out. 

A satyr showed you to your cabin, its dark and oppressive structure shrinking you down.  The satyr was quick to leave the moment your hand found the door handle. Typical. You rolled your eyes as you pushed it open.

It was much bigger than it needed to be, and remarkably dark. The few windows were covered with black curtains, and the overhead light shone dimly, as did the candles that were spread around. 

According the Chiron, you had one sibling, a little brother who occasionally came to camp. You curiously approached the one bunk that was in use. Your brother seemed the neat type, the bed was made, with clean white sheets, black blanket, and a single pillow. The dresser beside it was filled with black clothes, even a black version of the standard camp half blood shirt. This guy really committed to the bit. 

The only trace of personality was found in a few Polaroid photos sticking out from between the mattress and the bed frame. You couldn’t help pick one up to look at it. It was a very old black and white photo of a little boy and a girl. They looked like siblings. You put back the photo. 

You barely noticed the room was still dark. Sighing, you made your way to a window to shine a little sunlight in. 

You picked a top bunk on the other side of the room, and set your bag down. Completely moved in. You really needed more stuff. 

When dinner came, you quickly found out that you had to sit alone now. Great. No longer with acquaintances you could hold a pleasant conversation with from the Hermes cabin, who seemed to be getting along just fine without you. Your brow furrowed as you sat down. 

You picked at food. It was all good, the Camp Half Blood magic, and all, but your appetite was nowhere to be found. You halfway glared at the other tables, full of siblings, and even worse, the people who leaned back to laugh with friends at other tables. Maybe there was a good reason your brother didn’t come around often.

There was one guy though, that even in your soured mood, didn’t piss you off. Another person alone at their table. You watched him sceptically as as ate his… blue food, and texted with one hand. They said demigods couldn’t use phones? A bunch of people came by to talk to him as they were leaving the pavilion. Guess he’s popular. 

He glanced up, eyes landing on you, probably sending your gaze fixed on him. Fuck. You were totally staring. You blinked, and shifted your gaze to the table in front of you, and hoped he didn’t notice, or pay much mind. You hastily finished, discarding your plate and retreating to your cabin. 

Yikes. 

                                             …

As it turned out, you were not slick. The next day, when you were avoiding camp activities and the people who now awkwardly shuffled away from you when you tried to approach, you heard a knock on the door.

It was that guy. Of course it was. Who else would it be? Not your satyr, or any of the people from the Hermes cabin who were fine talking to you two days ago, not them. It was the guy who caught you staring at him. And you were here answering the door in your pyjamas. 

”Hey,” he said happily, waving. “I’m Percy.”

You hesitated. “Uh,” you started, standing awkwardly in the doorway. “Hi Percy, I’m Y/n.”

He smiled widely, and gestured behind him. “Do you have anything going on right now? Cuz I’ve been doing some swinging in the arena, I could always show you some stuff if you’re still new to it.”

He seemed rather friendly. You were hesitant to buy it. “Uh, I got a little lesson the other day from… some Hermes kid,” you ambled, crossing your arms. 

He shrugged, “Suit yourself,” he said. “But feel free to stop by,” he started to turn away, but apparently had something left to say, and shit you one more smile. “I saw you had to sit alone yesterday,” he said. “I know it can be kinda hard to be a new camper and big three kid, especially Hades, so like…” he pursed his lips. “Don’t be a stranger, I guess.”

And then he was off, leaving you a little surprised. He was a big three kid too? You stood in the doorway watching him leave for a little longer than you meant too. You slowly stepped back inside. He didn’t seem put off by your staring, at least. But he noticed you were all alone with no friends. You couldn’t tell which outcome would be more embarrassing. 

You looked it a window, and saw a few kids walking down the path. They seemed close, laughing together and telling jokes you couldn’t hear. Ugh. Maybe you did need to talk to people. Rotting in your cabin, lamenting, wasn’t getting you anywhere fun. 

Groaning, you rooted around in your bag, and then the closet. There were spare black shirts. You snickered grabbing one off the hook and finally changing out of your pyjamas. 

The sun was entirely too bright. You squinted as you made your way down the steps, using your hand to cover the light. Where did he say? The sword… arena? You found the first directional sign on the way, and followed it to a fairly large area, it’s ground solid, packed,  and slightly dusty. Around it were mock colosseum stands, for watching the battles, you supposed. At the far side, was the guy, Percy, you now knew, swinging a sword viciously against a dummy. He seemed to be alone. A little odd considering his apparent popularity. 

Sighing, half regretting coming out, you approached. It took him a moment to notice, but he grinned at you when he did. “Oh my gods, you  actually came,” he said, surprised.

You did your best to put on a friendly smile, unsure why that was a difficult task. He’s probably the only one here who didn’t avoid you like the plague. “Uh, yeah,” you laughed nervously. “You said something about sword fighting?” 

He nodded, wiping sweat from his forehead. “Yes,” he declared. “Let’s get you a weapon, I’ll give you the run down.”

You followed him towards a few weapons racks. “Well, I had a brief lesson the other day when I first arrived,” you said mindlessly, unsure why you kept resisting. You stood in front of the weapon rack. “Wait, is that a shotgun?”

Percy stifled a laugh, “yes, but I wouldn’t recommend it,” he said, going on to explain all the reasons why the various guns weren’t good tools. Something about celestial bronze, ammo, and other complaints. You nodded along idly, doing your best to listen. “So, I’d just go with one of the more… classic, weapons,” he finished. 

You eyed them. Sword, dagger, mace, mallet, sickle, scythe, entirely too many options, leaving you paralyzed.

“If you go with the sword, I can probably show you some cool tricks,” Percy chimed in. 

That was good enough for you. You took a bronze sword by the hilt, and raised it. “Wouldn’t it make more sense for me to just fight using my powers?”

”I mean, yeah,” he said, “if that’s something you can do.”

”Yeah,” You said. “I did that that on the day I was claimed.”

”On purpose?” He asked, brow raised. 

You suppressed a laugh, covering your mouth with the non sword hand. “Yeah?” You said, like it was obvious. “Is that something people do by accident?”

Percy started towards the centre of the arena, and you followed as he explained, “A lot of demigods aren’t great at controlling their powers at first.”

You stood in front of him, mirroring his sword stance awkwardly, “well, it wasn’t my first time… I guess I’ve always kind of known I was a Hades kid, even before I knew what that meant.”

Percy pocketed his… pen sword, and came closer to you, moving your arms, gently kicking your leg to signal you to move. He adjusted the way you held your sword, thumb tucked around the handle. “If you hold it like this, you’ll have a better grip, and with wider legs, your more stable,” he said, pulling away again, and assuming the same stance. You didn’t realize you were holding your breath until you exhaled with a sigh once he was gone. 

“If you can use your powers,” he said, wide grin. “Then don’t hold back, that’s what they’re for.”

“Uh, okay,” you stuttered, gripping the sword with white knuckles. “You’re not worried?”

He chuckled, “I mean, a little bit, but no more then I am when I fight Annabeth.” You nodded, and he smiled, and you pursed your lips, because it was a little charming. “Okay,” he started. “How much did they teach you before?”

”Little bit? Stances, I think. And… I know how to swing it,” you said dumbly, now realizing you were probably matched against a pro.

He didn’t judge though, instead moving beside you, and mimicked you exactly. He stepped forward with his front foot, and urged you to do the same. You followed his movement, doing your best to copy him, following his hops, slides, jabs, and slices.

A few half bloods walked by the path as you practised, a few waved at Percy, a couple of them even smiling at you. Proximity to somebody likeable, you supposed. A couple girls and one boy glared at you though, stopping to stare with crossed arms when Percy got close, or laughed at something you said. He didn’t seem to notice, luckily. 

“Okay,” Percy said after a while. “You’ve got the moves now, all the basics.”

”I got the basics,” you echoed, nodding along. You were already a little sweaty, the sun beating overhead and your black shirt wasn’t helping. 

“So do you want to try light sparring?” He asked. 

“Sure,” you asserted. Readying your blade much more confidently than you did before. “Yes,” you nodded again, mentally preparing.

He grinned, “Alright, don’t go easy on me.”

And you didn’t. But you could tell he was going easy on you. You slashed, he blocked, you stabbed, he dodged, you lunged, he parried. Shit, this guy was pretty good. 

You thought back to what he said about powers. Time to get a little fun with it. What did you have under control? Really just summoning the dead, the rest you’d only done by accident, like Percy asked before. 

Percy took advantage of your thinking to quickly slide forward and swing at your side, a blow you were barely able to block, your own blade wobbling as you barely redirected the attack. 

You pivoted back, and jabbed your sword into the ground, opening a vein to the underworld… or something. You weren’t exactly sure how it all worked. 

You had to duck and roll as Percy slashed forward while your sword was down. It appeared he was working your training wheels off. 

A few skeletons popped their heads out of the hole and grumbled, “Got anything good?” 

Fuck. Last time you had food to offer them. “Not now,” you said, dashing to your feet away from Percy and pulling your sword from the packed dirt. “But after this I can get you anything you want!”

Percy laughed, possibly at your desperation, and started to lunge again as the skeletons deliberated and discussed whether they’d help you. 

“Oh my gods!” You shouted, blocking a strike and trying to throw one of your own. Percy seemed to dodge it with all the ease in the world. “Get your pussy asses out here and help me, you useless fucks, there’s good shit in it for you!”

They grumbled, but climbed out of the vein. Five skeletons, you counted as you hopped out of the way of Percy’s sword. “Okay!” You yelled. They were just standing there like assholes. “Fight him!”

The skeletons complied, but not before the apparent ring leader made a snide comment about your tone, claiming you had anger issues.

But the skeletons did fight for you, circling Percy and readying their firsts. They didn’t have weapons, and before you could yell at them to go to the rack, they were already attacking, flailing at Percy wildly. 

You were allotted a moment to catch your breath as Percy dealt with it. Even without weapons, they were doing an alright job, but Percy was quick to react and form a new strategy. He ducked out of their circle and beheaded one of them. The skeleton groaned out a complaint as the skull rolled towards you. 

You pursed your lips. Percy used every opportunity you gave him to strike, even if it was cheap. Your turn. You crept behind him as he dealt with your small army, and raised your sword.

But fuck, was Percy reactive. He turned on a dime and swept your leg, sending you tumbling to the ground, knocking the wind out of you with an oomf. Groaning, you rolled over on your side and wheezed out what was left of your breath, and did your best to suck in another.

”Oh, shit, Y/n, are you alright?” He asked quickly, kneeling down beside you and discarding his weapon. 

Before you could nod, the skeletons whacked him out of the way. Oh right. Percy was sent tumbling to the ground, completely unready for the attack.

He scrambled to grab his sword again, but with a little strength, you waved off your undead defenders. “It’s cool guys,” you wheezed, still in the ground.

They looked at each other dumbly. “Can we have our food now?”

You glared and coughed. “Not now, go back in the hole, I’ll get you later,” you spat.

They had a few complaints, but eventually crawled back in the hole, as requested. And Percy was right back at your side, sword gone, water bottle in hand and offering it to you. “I’m sorry,” he gasped, offering you a hand. You took it, and he pulled you up to a sit. “I got a little carried away,” he admitted, handing you the bottle.

He looked at you with concern in his eyes, and you coughed once more. Hopefully the last time. “I’m good,” you managed, shooting him a smile. Or at least trying to.

”Do you think you need to go to the infirmary?” He asked.

You shook your head. Your breath was already coming back, and other than that all you had were a few bruises. “It’s fine, really,” you said. 

He looked like he doubted you, but he said nothing, instead pressing his lips together, and slumping down to fully sit beside you. “I started to forget this was your first time fighting.”

You laughed, and it only hurt a little bit, “That means I must be pretty good, right?” You screwed open the cap of your water bottle, and took a drink. One gulp and you were suddenly aware of the dryness in your throat, and had to down half of it to quench yourself.

Percy smiled, a water bottle of his own in his hand. “Hey, you’re not bad for a newbie,” he laughed. “Sorry again. I can let you beat me to make up for it, if you want.”

You choked out a laugh, “You won’t have to let me next time, alright?”

He laughed. ”I’ll hold you to that,” he smiled, taking a swig of his water and wiping away sweat. “You really did hold your own.”

You nodded, unable to form words for a moment. You gasped for breath after choking a gulp of water. “Thank,” you heaved. “For helping. Couldn’t have survived more then a minute without you.”

He smiled softly, “it’s no problem.”

”You’re the only one to even try.” The bitterness from earlier was creeping back. Percy was a friend, now, you were certain. The only one. 

He pursed his lips, and looked at the ground. “Yeah…” he started. He looked like he had more to say, but seemed to trail off. 

“I appreciate the effort,” you said, lightly kicking the hilt of your sword. 

He nodded lamely, “It’s no problem, really.” He sighed, and looked around at the empty arena, and the trees and fields surrounding it. “I have some friends that’ll get to camp soon for summer, they’re school and… stuff… ends a week after mine,” he said, looking straight ahead. “They’re cool, you’ll get along. Not everyone is scared of a Hades kid.”

You looked at him, eyes wide. “Uh, that’s good to hear,” you managed. “I can’t say I wasn’t disappointed by… everyone.”

He looked over at you, and you fought the urge to look away, like he caught you staring again. “They’ll come around when they realize you’re cool,” he assured. Then you had to look away, because your lips were being tugged up in an embarrassingly large smile. 

“I hope so,” you said timidly, smiling at your shoes.

Percy laughed, “People were weird around me, too, when I first came to camp,” he admitted, fidgeting with his pen. He twisted and spun it through his fingers, only occasionally dropping it. “Clarisse wanted to kill me, Annabeth was stalking me, a bunch of people were kinda scared of me? And I always had to sit alone at dinner.” He said, faint smile on his lips, like reminiscing. “It was a lot, I get what you’re going though… kind of.”

You nodded along with his story. “And… you managed to make friends with them anyway?” 

Percy laughed, “Well with Clarisse I’d say it’s still up in the air, but I guess we’re more friends then we are enemies nowadays.”

You smiled, staring at your shoes. “Well, that’s good,” you smiled softly. 

“The same thing will happen to you, done worry,” he said, lightly punching your shoulder. You snickered at his touch, punching him right back. 

“If you say so,” you giggled. Your black shirt was damp with sweat, and stuck to your back. “I’ll try my best.”

He shook his head, “you won’t have to, they’ll like you as is.”

You heart fluttered a moment. You were really starting to get why people glared at you earlier, for spending so much time alone with this guy.  You smiled, doing your best to not feel awkward. “Thanks, Percy.”

He smiled, and stood up, dusting himself off and offering you a hand. Once again, you took it, and this time noticed his callouses, probably from years of this exact type of training. He had a strong grip. “Let’s say we’re done sword practice for today, okay?” 

“Yeah,” you agreed, picking up your blade and bringing it back where you found it.

You walked together to the dining pavilion. You had actually worked up an appetite today. The place you felt so alone last night, you now approached with a friend, and the promise of a friend group. And you got a few more sceptical looks from other campers, but that all melted away when Percy would wave or snap a finger gun at them. 

And you realized your previous judgement was wrong. Camp Half Blood might not be so bad, and maybe you could feel okay. Despite the skeletons, this might have been the most normal day in a while. Maybe Camp Half Blood would be different. Not because of the place, the god overseeing it, or any of that. But because Percy was different. Apparently his friends to. 

You broke off from him to find your table and get a plate, and this time, didn’t feel too bad about staring at him. You realized that table was the Poseidon table. Definitely one of the big three gods. He caught you staring again, and this time he waved, and you glanced around. 

You got up, plate in hand and walked over. “Do we like, half to sit at our table, or…?” you asked, tilting your head side to side. You couldn’t help look at his food, all of which was blue.

He looked around, eyes wide, “Well it’s against the rules to sit at another one…” he said, looking at the other tables, many full. “But, like,” he said, “it’s not a rule I haven’t broken before.”

You smiled, sitting across from him, “good enough for me,” you shrugged. You got a few weird looks. Just a couple. But dinner was always better with a friend. This summer was looking to be a good one.  

I actually got this one done in like a single day,,, that’s not usual for me. *mwah*

#x reader #my writing #pjo #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson fanfiction #pjo x reader #percy pjo #percy jackson x you

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

03/04/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Cast&Crew;WJW; Con O'Neill; David Jenkins; Bumbles; Rhys Darby; A LeagueOfTheirOwn Watch Party; Wrecked WP Continues; NewarkNewark WP tomorrow; Fundraiser Statuses; SchadenFreude; Fan Spotlight; Podcasts; LoveNotes; DailyDarby/Tonight's Taika

== Cast & Crew Sightings ==

== Wee John Wonday ==

Today's Wee John Wonday featured our Pirate Queen Ruibo Qian! Please check the video out on Kristian's Instagram! Don't have time to watch? There are some highlights below the pic!

Some Highlights:

Anapela couldn't make it tonight sorry!

Ruibo is really into perfume like Kristian

Ruibo and Anapela really clicked on set!

Ruibo still has hope regarding s3!

“DO I wanna smell like a haystack with a cow dung hidden inside of it?” - Ruibo

Ruibo would be interested in polycule, Zheng may not be

Kristian has an announcement coming out tomorrow - 📚

Apparently the last episode, when they were all walking out in the colonial outfits, it was SUPER LONG and a lot of it was cut.

Qian means money = so Ruibo is literally the Money Bitch

== Con O'Neil ==

One of our wonderful crew-mates was out and about and ran into none other than THE Con O'Neill! Thank you so much for sharing this meet up with us @queerjolras!

Con also posted a picture of himself and his pup Cooper on IG today!

== David Jenkins ==

Our friend @cosmosart-s posted a lovely picture of David for the 2 year anniversary OFMD anniversary and David ran it on his IG Story! One thing I've noticed a few people mentioning was the "3" hearts. Not to clown/honk too hard, but just something to think about <3

== Rare Bumbles Sighting ==

Many of you know of Rhys and Rosie's cat Bumbles, but we don't get to see Bumbles too often! Rosie uploaded an adorable photo of one of the Darby Feline-Fam.

== Rhys Darby ==

Are you in Aotearoa? Stop in to seen see Rhys on Wed 3 Apr 2024, 8:00pm–10:00pm at the Wild Estate in Auckland!

New Cryptid Factor Episode!

89: #089 The 2nd First Issue!

Spotify / Podfriend / Apple Podcasts

== New Watch Parties ==

= Mar 3 - Mar 7 A League Of Their Own =

Join us this week starting Monday, March 4th for a multi-fandom watch party! Each day will have different games and polls! (Sorry this is a bit late, I didn't get it until today!)

Where: Amazon Prime

Time: Every day 1 PM EST / 10AM PT! 

Day One, March 4th: Pilot episodes for both series with tweeting predictions for the rest of the seasons. 

Day Two, March 5th: Bingos! Live tweet your reaction and share your filled out bingo cards! 

Day Three, March 6th: Polls! Live tweet your reactions and share your thoughts on the shows so far! 

Day Four, March 7th: Caption the screencaps from the shows: Wrong answers only! 

Day Five, March 8th: Finale time! Share your predictions for the next seasons with the hashtags. 

Watch Party Hashtags:

OurFlagMeansBaseball, 

SaveOFMD 

SaveALOTO to join the event! 

== Watch Party Reminders! ==

Mar 4 - Mar 8: Wrecked Season 1

Wrecked is no longer on any streaming platform, and it is not available digitally on US sites. (Apparently, it is available on German Amazon?) There are sources being passed around. If access is an issue, DM @iamadequate1 on Twitter or Tumblr

Season 1 watch from March 4th to March 8th. 

Season 2 watch from March 11th to March 15th. 

Season 3 watch from March 18th to March 22nd. 

Times will be 10pm GMT / 5pm EST / 4pm CST / 2pm PST. Watch two episodes per day. Episodes are 21-22 minutes each. Use the following Saturday for the tags/watch if interested but not able to make this time.

Hashtags: 

#WreckedPirates

#SaveOFMD

#RhysDarbyFaction

= Mar 5: NewarkNewark with @adoptourcrew =

Please join @adoptourcrew for a @NewarkNewark watch party on March 5th at 10 pm GMT/ 2pm PS / 5pm EST!

== Fundraiser Statuses ==

= Underground Ads =

The Final Stage of the Save OFMD Crew fundraisor for the underground ads is still going! If you're so inclined, feel free to donate or share around! Ko-Fi Link

= In Soup Now =

Wow! Only 24 hours open, and already at 10%! Great job all!

== Schaden Freude ==

Thanks @iamadequate1 for catching the very sad times WBD Inc is experiencing on the NASDAQ

== How to Help ==

Another Ranker Poll! Feel free to hop in and bump OFMD up. You can rank shows up AND down so make sure to rank other shows as well. Ranker Link

== Fan Spotlight ==

Our lovely crew-mate @melvisik is back again, this time with our favorite Captain Rhys Darby as part of the Crew Cards <3

== Podcasts ==

@fandomthingpod on Twitter did an episode on the OFMD Renewal campaign and interviewed our esteemed crew-mate @lcwebsxoxo! They gave lots of kudos to the @saveofmdcrewmates and @adoptourcrew and the recaps got a shout out too! (Ty for the mention LC!) The Campaign To Save OurFlagMeansDeath

== Love Notes ==

Hello lovelies :) It was an action packed day for sure (as Mondays usually are). That being said I took some time to do some stuff today I've been meaning to, so I apologize for not taking more time on love notes!

Please know me and your crew-mates are thinking of you and hoping for all the best things for you in the upcoming days.

I know it's short but here are some reminders / love notes in other people's words for today/tomorrow. <3

Stay Strong Lovelies! Whatever you're up to, you're gonna make it through, I believe in you!

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Yeahhhhh no gifs tonight luvs, I am running late and I can't stop looking at these still pictures anyway, so here you are <3

Taika Src / Rhys courtesy of Prim on Discord!

#daily ofmd recap #daily ofmd recaps #ofmd daily recap #ofmd daily recaps #ofmd #our flag means death #david jenkins #rhys darby #ruibo qian #taika waititi #love notes #watch parties #fundraisers #kristian nairn #bumbles #con o'neill

[zapazai]

Gonna talk about how much I love this photo for a second cause its so perfect

So obviously this is from when mickey goes to see Ian in the club for the first time. Ian is very standoffish and yk don't really talk to mickey. Mickey is trying to bring Ian home we all know what's going on.

Anyway. First, i wanna talk about the colours or more the prominence of one colour, red. Red has connotations of love and anger so it's think it's so perfect for this scene. Mickey and Ian love each other, but over that, there is sure to be some anger along with that. I think the fact their angry towards stems from love makes red even more perfect. When I say that it stems from love, I mean from mickey marrying svet ofc. The wedding wouldn't have happened if mickey didn't love ian enough to even invite him to stay round ian wouldnt be so hurt if he didn't love mickey. It's all love. More than just love and anger, tho red often represents betrayal. Not that I think either of them betrayed the other, but I can see how they both might feel that way. Mickey because Ian left when he needed him and Ian because mickey married svet in the first place but also cause he didn't ask him to say.

Okay next, there is a very clear emotion split between them here. Mickey is reaching out and Ian is pulling away, they're divided. AND U CAN SEE THAT WITH THE LIGHT BEAM. isn't that just so good?? The light cuts right through the middle of them almost like a wall. AN EMOTIONAL WALL. Ian has his walls up around mickey cause he's feels betrayed and angry at the man he loves. That like circles back to the colour red and how it fits so perfectly. Spliting mickey and Ian up rn is a wall of anger and love and betrayal.

I love how Ian is very clearly looking away from mick, whereas mickey is trying to make eye contact with Ian. This just shows even more how unresponsive Ian is to mickey. Ian has light on his face and mickeys looking at that. Mickey is quite literally looking at the light. Light is hopeful, love filled , bright, and positive. Just as much as mickey is searching for ians eyes here, I also think he's searching for light in Ian. Mickey needs Ian rn, but ian isn't himself. He's looking for the isn he knows and to mickey Ian is light.

Mickey is in only shadows. This could be a few things like Ian wasn't looking for mickey. U don't look for dark yk u look for light. And obviously, mickey isn't in the stream of light. Mickey wasn't the one who put up the wall, so he's behind it.

Anyway, I think way too much about this random picture and probably doesn't have any actual meaning. This is just me being extra about gallavich cause I love them. Also Ians side profile is actually gorgeous.

//

Editing this ig cause i just got an ask saying if was a photo Edit so credit to @samantitheos for changing my life with this

#gallavich #im going insane #ian and mickey #mickey milkovich #ian gallagher #s4 gallavich #they make me crazy #i need to stop talking

[ma1dita]

'en route' - i. imaginary friend

pictures are not mine, 3rd is a photo concept by @geloyconcepcion on ig

read along here (will update) : part ii, part iii, part iv

song of the chapter: revolution 0 by boygenius

en route playlist: here

words: 3.9k

summary: pt ¼ of ‘en route’. You and James are kindred spirits. Fighting in the First Wizarding War just seems to be your only escape.

warnings: no use of y/n, religious iconography sprinkled here and there, depictions of loss/war, angst, unhappy(?) marriage, fake marriage, twin flames vibe, they’re just kids they should be at the club bro

a/n: setting the scene is always so hard LOL. i love writing morally grey characters, please feel free to comment if you want to be added onto the taglist, or scream at me <3 thanks for the patience, you won’t have to wait as long for the next part lol

(posted 12/28/23, might come back to edit)

—

END OF MARCH 1980

There’s not a lot of things you like to remember about the year 1980. The memories blur together, highly repressed in a busy corner of your mind, and if someone held you at wandpoint to ask about what happened, you’re not sure where to begin. You don’t talk about it much anymore, but if you did, it wouldn’t be sufficient to put it in a few simple words.

And maybe if you did, the remembering wouldn’t hurt as much. With little physical things to hang onto, however—holding onto this hurt reminds you it was real.

From what you can remember anyway, it all started on his birthday.

You felt eyes on you as soon as you stormed into the room. In this congregation of people trying to save the world, it was easy to feel unseen in your struggles to keep moving forward. A pair of kaleidoscope eyes meet yours for a small moment, and that’s when you knew it was risky. It’s easy to hide in a crowd of Aurors enjoying the reprieve from the reality of the world outside of headquarters’ protected doors, fading into the background.

But he saw you, and that was terrifying–to be perceived.

Frank Longbottom pours you a pint, and you nod your head in thanks, taking a long sip before settling down into a chair at the bar. The same pair of eyes see through you, past your hunched frame, down to the core of your grief. Something about it resonates with him deeply, and the boys notice his attention is away from the conversation they’re having in the living room.

“She's pretty, yeah? French, I think. Never says more than a few words to anyone though, I tried. All business,” Sirius mumbles to his best friend over a glass of firewhiskey.

James looks up at Sirius from his position in the armchair, his head tilted to one side in curiosity at the way you fold into yourself.

"Yeah, I guess," James replies reluctantly. "I've never properly spoken to her, but I can tell she's very... mellow."

“Heard she lost people. The war hasn't been kind to her like it has to a lot of us. Don't know if she'll budge, Prongs. Some pages are best left unturned,” Remus says, shuffling a deck of cards between his scarred fingers. Sirius grunts in response, not caring for the conversation as he takes another sip of his drink.

James knows now what he recognizes within you. Grief has been looming over him too, latched onto his spine, weighing him down as the responsibilities grow by the day. His eyes flicker to his wife’s baby bump as she stands near the window laughing at something Marlene and Peter were acting out. Lily falling pregnant was his sign to get his shit together, because if he didn’t, who would?

Like a shadow, you shy away from the light and laughter that fills the room. But there was no escape once he started walking in your direction. There was no grandiose introduction, no heart-stopping, earth-shattering moment. Both consumed by grief unseen by most, two people sat at the bar in silent reverence of each other’s breathing, daring the other to say something.

“Didn’t know I was crashing your birthday Potter. Seems I don't have a gift,” you say suddenly, words rushing out as your eyes trace his profile.

A beat passes.

His head bobs up and for a second you think you’ve said the wrong thing until you realize he’s smiling. He looks up grinning like the devil, eyes meeting yours with a smile you could only describe as radiant. It stirs something deep within you, and you watch your hands reach toward your butterbeer to avoid his searing gaze.

“Terrible time to have a party anyway. I think it’s more for them than it is for me.”

“Could’ve fooled me,” you scoff lightly, and his head jerks towards you as you continue, “You’re a bit too happy for my liking.”

“Oh?” His body turns to follow, knees bumping against yours under the bartop.

“How come you know so much about me then? You don’t give any of us a chance with you.”

James says this jokingly, but a part of it rings true like a punch in the gut. You were so impressionable, left soft and malleable by the grief that became you that you found it quite infuriating that someone like him could be so happy in the middle of a war like this one.

A noise of acknowledgement leaves your throat and he watches your fingers clench around the glass. Too much? Change the subject.

“What’s the ‘T’ necklace you have on?”

The chain swings against your chest as you adjust yourself on the barstool, becoming aware of the weight of it.

“What?”

“What does it mean? Must be important to you, whoever this fellow is. See you wear it every day,” he says adamantly, before backtracking and realizing how stalkerish that sounds.

“Potter, have you never met a Christian?” Your eyes dart between him and his hands on the bartop, more glaringly, the platinum wedding band on his left hand. Surely, anything should be more interesting than conversing with a stranger at his own party.

“A who? Who’s Christian? Are you?”

The beginning of a smile breaks onto your face like daybreak. It’s refreshing, he thinks. He doesn’t think he’s made someone smile like that in a while.

“You idi–,” you exhale, “It’s not… Muggles don’t have magic like us, so they have belief systems. Higher power they believe in. Weren’t you Head Boy at Hogwarts, how did you pass Muggle Studies?”

“Elective. Do you believe in that stuff? God and what not?”

Your calf brushes his pant leg accidentally. Why can’t you stop fidgeting? He makes you nervous, all these questions, and then you blurt your response out in rapid succession that he’s almost unable to catch it.

“No. Maybe. My parents did, and God was important to them, so I wear this necklace because of it. They’re important to me. I used to before I found out I was a witch. Used to pray that God would save me, make me something other than mundane—well, here I am now. Not quite sure if he heard me.”

It hits you that the last time you’ve been able to speak about your parents like this was at their funeral two months back. Right before you joined the Order, and sitting here in front of James suddenly feels stifling. You roll your jacket sleeves up, hyperaware that he’s watching your every move.

He keeps his tone light, but the smile on his face is kind as he mutters, “You think some bloke up top is calling all the shots for everyone?” James says this without judgment and your breath quivers.

“I don’t know, but I think things happen for a reason. I’m still trying to find out what that exactly is.”

His pinky nudges yours on the sticky bartop, and his glasses slide down the bridge of his nose as he tilts his head in thought.

“Did. Is the believing past tense?”

You’re not sure what’s changed in the past few minutes that’s made you comfortable in his presence, but you crack a joke before you think too hard.

“My parents are. Past tense.”

Laughter spills out of you like the bubbles on your refilled pint glass, and James scrunches his face, holding back until his shoulders are shaking from the effort.

“Merlin….yeah. Mine too.”

Oh.

You look at him through your eyelashes, silence filling the space between you two as the rest of the party goes on in the background. James clinks his glass with yours, and there’s a silent understanding that bridges between you, connecting you together.

—

END OF APRIL 1980

“You know if we’re gonna be friends, you should probably call me James.”

The two of you were left sitting in the den to deliberate on the mission you were being sent at the end of this week. Three whole months with James Potter could be a nightmare. But it could also be quite fun, you think, watching him flick through the mission files with a quirk in his lip that can only signal mischief. Signing away your life wouldn’t be so bad if you had him to keep you company. You’d never tell him that though.

“Will we be? You don’t seem that excited.”

“Excited to be shipped away from everyone we know is definitely a statement, love.”

“I’m not eager if that’s what you’re insinuating. Just feel obligated, especially if it helps the cause. That’s why you’re here, right?” Right. In a war like this one, ordinary people like you and him pay the highest price. But nothing seemed ordinary about you, like a complex puzzle he was constantly wracking his brain to figure out. There are aspects of your personality that come to light the more he talks to you over these past few weeks, almost luring him in so he can unveil the secrets you hold. Why do you put yourself on the front lines like this, mission after mission? Who do you have in your life that makes you want to fight against the odds? What do you think of to keep you going? Why can’t he stop thinking about you?

He blinks, before looking at you, “S’not that I don’t want to go with you, and do my duty, I just…”

“You love it. I can see it in your eyes, you were trouble at school, weren’t you?” James’ smile gets wider, thinking back to the last few years, before everything went to shit. Back when it was easier, just him and his three friends, and his biggest worry was getting Lily Evans to look at him.

“Just a lot to worry about. People to take care of.” His mind falls back to his wife sitting at home, probably wondering why he isn’t back from the Order meeting, getting more agitated by the minute. He thinks of the nursery he still needs to set up, and the legal affairs he’s left behind after his parents’ death. He thinks of checking in on his boys, who barely know how to take care of themselves if they don’t come over for dinner, and finally, he exhales.

“You?“

It’s an honest question, and by asking it, he extends himself to you, an insight into the burdens he carries with him daily. The difficulty and complexity of having a large capacity to love is carrying the weight until you cannot.

“Just me and my rucksack. Gives me something to do.” You give him a tight-lipped smile, busying yourself with packing the supplies Dumbledore gave you two earlier. Vials of Polyjuice Potion, two golden wedding bands, magically enhanced IDs— it was like playing pretend. That’s all this has to be. Easy enough.

James looks at you and understands a bit more. You need this job. And if he’s being honest, so does he.

“I still wonder what would happen if it doesn’t work out, don’t get me wrong. But then I think, what if it does? What if no one else has to die?” A noise of agreement rises from his throat as he straightens his posture on the couch.

War shouldn’t be an escape, much less a distraction to two people grieving. There are countless muggles and wizards alike losing their lives to a genocide of people undeserving of a fate dictated by a person who plays god. But when you’re fighting for your life before you can even legally drink in some countries, there are two things left to consider when making a decision: to choose something difficult or to choose wrong.

And neither of you have ever found anything easy. Not in this life at least.

He sighs. James really needs to get home.

“Well…We will be friends by the end of this. I’m sure. Already gonna be married to you anyways,” he jokes.

“Don’t get used to it, what a pity that would be for your ego,” you gripe, but a trace of amusement is present on your lips as you watch him stand up to leave.

“We’ll see about that, love.”

He apparates home. Onto the next difficult thing.

When James told Lily that he’d be on a mission for the latter half of her pregnancy, she didn’t take it well. But to be honest, with everything going on, James couldn’t help but feel exasperated. How bad is his marriage that he’d rather risk his life instead of tending to his family’s needs? James sits at the dining table listening to her yell, and he feels extra heavy today, wondering how he feels so ancient at 20 years old.

Years ago he dreamed of this, a wife, kids, a pretty townhouse. But this isn’t what he quite imagined. He looks at his wife as she paces around the room, hand on her bump, red hair spreading little fires as she goes. She’s his everything. Truly. He spent years trying to even find that spark in her, dedicated his life to her, and gave up everything to take care of her—but she struggled a lot these past few months. Her pregnancy brought on incendiary words falling upon him like lashes as she blamed him for moving too quickly. Blamed him for the fact they’ve felt like strangers in this little house. But with his parents both sick, getting married seemed like the next right thing.

An owl flits to his kitchen window once Lily storms out again, leaving nothing but ashes of her disappointment in her wake. Ashes, ashes… James wonders where his spark has gone. He hates to disappoint.

Just wanted to owl and check in. I found myself thinking about you and wanted to make sure you’re okay, with everything changing so quickly. Hope you and your wife figure it out, I’ll be on the 11 AM Knight Bus tomorrow outside Diagon Alley regardless. See you.

He thinks of you, so brave and filled with a spark he used to recognize within himself. This isn’t wrong, he reasons, just difficult. But he won’t admit that taking his wedding band off before settling onto the couch was easier than he thought it would be. He feels lighter. As he takes off his glasses and stares at the ceiling of his living room that night, James wonders how much longer he can ignore his problems by not looking at them properly. How much longer does he have to carry the weight? When will someone help him carry the load?

For now, he tries to sleep. One step at a time, James. Like always. There’s a mission he has to start tomorrow. And he doesn’t want to disappoint you.

—

You’re not surprised when he turns up to your meeting point the next morning, not addressing him when you stick your wand hand out to summon the bus. He bites back a smile, knowing you were right and thinking you see right through him. Now look who’s the eager one.

After paying eleven sickles each, you lead him to a window seat, ignoring the babbles of other passengers as you look out the window.

“You ever think about all these people, with their little lives and everything they have to do?” you pipe up, head against the glass. James scoffs, “I always think about other people. Sometimes I wonder if anyone thinks of me like that. If anyone worries as you do over strangers.”

“I thought we were friends,” you say coyly, still not looking at him, and his heart skips a beat. Probably nerves. “You think Dumbledore cares that he’s sending off two teenagers to fight a war and save the wizarding world?”

“I’m an adult, thank you very much.”

“We’re kids, James,” You look at him, and he blinks at the sound of his given name falling from your lips that he almost loses the next part of your sentence, “we’re kids working towards a bigger picture of world peace. Isn’t that fucking insane that this what our lives amount to?”

He couldn’t agree more, but his forehead creases at your tone.

“Why do you act like your best years are behind you? There’s a lot to live for still,” he murmurs knowingly.

He pats your thigh and the only thing you notice is the tan of his hand against his missing wedding band. Soon it will be replaced by one that binds him to you, temporarily, but it’s jarring all the same. You shake off the uneasy feeling that rises in your stomach.

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.”

James is doing that thing again, the whole savior complex bit that you notice is one and the same with his trying hard to be carefree personality. But you’re coming to learn that James cares. A lot.

—

“Apartment 11B?”

“Uh, yeah.”

Two swigs of Polyjuice Potion did the job once you stepped off the bus and walked through town to the place you’ll inhabit for a fourth of the year, and quickly, you both become unrecognizable to even each other. A blonde eyebrow looks at you under James’ glasses at your hesitation, so you clear your throat.

“For Mr. and Mrs. Fawley. We just got married, you see. Newlywed jitters.” His voice is lighter and more posh as his hand reaches out to rest on your shoulder.

“Hmm, yes. Harry—er…Henrietta and Draco–” the receptionist squints at her paper, and you sigh at how pretentious the names sound together. Not in this life. You ought to wring Alice’s neck. That girl loves to make stories, and the more frilly your personas she created, the more difficult it’ll be to upkeep.

“No need, Etta and Drake are fine, love,” you say with a more confident grin, leaning against your faux husband.

The keys slide across the countertop, and you walk to the elevator, hand in hand until you’re out of sight. As you approach the door, James crouches a bit and puts his hands on his knees.

“What are you doing?”

“Jump up. Gotta carry you over the threshold.”

“Shut up, Drake,” reminding yourself to use his false name in case someone’s watching, but he looks at you with a shit-eating grin.

“Exactly. Just in case. Come on, just indulge me.” You shake your head in disbelief but hop onto his back all the same. Not exactly traditional, but it stirs up a feeling in you that you haven’t felt before. He carries you through the doorway and spins you once, twice, three times before you squeal and he giggles, placing you gently onto the sofa. It’s a cozy apartment with enough space for the two of you, cream walls, and a small kitchen with an island overlooking the entertaining space. The hallway leads to what you presume is the only bedroom, and there’s a nervous energy that sifts through the air as you both place protective charms everywhere, to ward off prying eyes and ears. How intimate. James falls back onto the sofa with a huff, sitting next to you, and both of you are unsure of what to say.

“I can take the sofa,” he says into the silence, and you turn to look at him incredulously.

‘For three months? James, I can't ask you to do that.”

“You’re not asking. I’m offering.”

“You’re gonna be hunched over by the end of the week. What if we rotate?”

There’s no disagreement, feeling the springs in the cushion beneath your bottoms already. James perks up, leaning over to grab something from his bag, and by the time he leans back up, he looks like himself again, the small dose of Polyjuice wearing off. You can feel your hair go back to its original shade and texture, and he smiles wider when he sees your face.

“Look what I got. Remus gave it to me back at Hogwarts but I never really used up all the film. Thought we could take some pictures and look back on this one day.” It’s sweet, how he loves his friends like they’re an extension of himself. You reckon you don't have anyone like that, smiling at him fumbling with the tiny camera in his hands.

“It’ll take a while to develop. Gotta keep it safe if we’re making it out of this,” you say, taking it from him and throwing yourself back onto the backrest leaning against him to point and shoot one of yourselves in this moment, disheveled and domestic. The flash goes off and he looks like a deer in headlights, making you cackle.

“You miss them?” He’s not sure who you’re referring to, so he rattles on anyway. He loves talking about the people he loves.

“The boys…Just miss being kids at Hogwarts, y’know? The end of the world back then was not getting enough O’s on NEWTs. You?”

“Mhm. None of them are in Britain though. They came for my parents’ funeral, and they always say they’ll visit but…That’s my fault too, I guess.” You tuck your leg underneath you, turning to face him, and he’s cuddled up against a throw pillow.

“Your parents were awesome. Didn’t know them well besides your dad being in the Order and stuff, but they were really brave. Your mom hugged me at my parents’ burial and I think that was the first time I let myself cry after they died. That’s one of the few things I remember from that day.”

A breath of air escapes your lungs at his anecdote. It’s been a few months since they passed but you’ll never stop missing them.

“I don’t remember a lot from theirs either. It’s all kind of been a blur since. I think I remember you and Sirius smoking in the back and him offering me a cigarette.” He laughs silently at the memory of his best friend.

“No one ever talks about how much there is to do after your parents die,” he says, and you roar with agreement.

“Yes! I’m still battling out their assets in court! It’s difficult to live life alone, thinking they’ve set you up for the future, but feeling like a rug’s been pulled out from underneath you. I just wish…They left this world together, y’know? And that’s great, but sometimes I feel selfish wondering what will happen to me.”

James nods slowly, taking your words in. He’s never had anyone to talk about this with, people pitying him instead, or acting like it didn’t matter, but it’s been almost a year and he can’t go to bed without thinking about how his parents died a week apart because even in death, they couldn’t be away for long. James wonders if you’ve noticed that he hasn’t talked about missing his wife, and the selfishness you mentioned prods at him. He smiles grimly, and takes the ring box from your bag, asking for your hand.

“Hey. You’re never gonna be alone again, alright? Not if it’s up to me.”

You roll your eyes as he flips the cover open, revealing the two gold bands, yours with a sizable diamond in the center.

“Do you think I’d give you that much power over me, James? This is all fake.”

“Fake marriage, but a true promise. I think you might, eventually.”

He slides the ring onto your left ring finger, sealing it with a gentle kiss on the back of your hand.

—

“The first time you caught my eye it was not love at first sight. Instead, a quiet curiosity was planted in my chest and I knew it was only a matter of time before you sunk beneath my bones and nurtured this deep-seated familiarity into a love so fierce that I would question if I had ever been in love before.” - Lyra Wren

general taglist: @jsjcue

en route taglist: @xcinnamonmalfoyx @babyclea @idkman5335 @timhalamet @ttulipwritezz @lilylovesu @thatonedogwithablog @lovemerigt

#made by ma1dita ♥︎ #james potter x reader angst #james potter x reader #marauders x reader #marauders era #mischiefmoons er

[jadedrrose]

parent!Law Headcanons

Warnings: Not really any. Pregnancy talk, ig? But otherwise this is nothing but fluff.

•With Law being… well, Law, he was obviously uncertain and scared at first when you came to him that day, telling him of your “symptoms”. Those feelings were only amplified when he did verify that you were, in fact, pregnant.

•For the first few weeks, he was stressed. Unsure of what to do. But with your help, he was able to overcome that.

•After that, he had a new stress… being worried about you and the child within you. But; Law, being the doctor he is, would go simply above and beyond to help you through the pregnancy. I mean, really, it doesn’t get better than that.

•He would go week by week with you, informing you of how the infant is growing, how big they are, what parts they’re currently developing, everything.

•Although Law technically has a short temper (sort of?), he wouldn’t be the kind of guy to be mad at his wife for being hormonal, emotional, etc. The man is a doctor!!! He knows what’s going on!!

•Then, the delivery. He would know the early signs of going into labor, and would do everything in his power to make it comfortable for you in advance.

•He’ll never forget the day your daughter was born. ‘Course, he was the one delivering her, so there was nothing he didn’t see. Very unforgettable.

•Would call her “my love”. Or maybe something dumb… like, you know… “baby-ya”…

•Honestly? He’d probably cry. Either he’d walk away to do so alone, or right then and there while holding the child. But never if anyone else but you were around.

•Law would absolutely be the kind of father to take over all the work for the first few months. He barely sleeps anyway, so he’d be the one to stay up all night to take care of her. He’d probably panic and force you to lay back down if you tried getting up at night to help, telling you repeatedly “you need to rest!”.

•But of course, don’t take that in a “he denies you any time to really take care of/bond with the baby” way, He just wants you to rest at night. During the day, he’d be more than happy to let you take over. He’s also a captain of a pirate crew, after all.

•Again, being a doctor, he knows everything about how a child should be growing, what can go wrong, everything. So really, you’d probably have the healthiest child ever. If she even dare gets a cough he’s immediately worried, trying to figure out what the issue is.

•Your daughter would end up having his hair color, but your eyes and a mixture of his sharp facial features and your own features.

•Bepo is now her personal pet polar bear, I don’t make the rules, sorry Law (but of course… he still cuddles with Bepo, just now with your daughter joining).

•As she grows into a toddler, Law would let her play with the crew more. Mostly Bepo, because what child wouldn’t want to cuddle the cute, friendly polar bear?!

•The submarine would 100% always be filled with the adorable laughter of the little girl, with the goofy crewmates always making her laugh.

•Although Law would normally find a kid scream-laughing and giggling annoying, your daughter’s laughs would soon become one of his favorite sounds.

•And as she grows more adventurous with her little legs now allowing her to run, Law would become very protective over the girl.

• Would probably send her (with you, of course) down to the bottom of the submarine to hide if there was ever a battle/fight. Even though she insists she’s strong like her mommy and daddy.

•And more on that note, she wouldn’t be scared of much. I mean, her daddy’s a tall guy with lots of tattoos and piercings who carries a sword around with him everywhere. This little girl fears nothing.

•Now onto more random things:

•Keeps photos of her in your arms throughout her life on his desk.

•She would absolutely pick up on her daddy’s language… even the bad words.

•He lets her steal his hat. Before she existed, that was your job, but you decided she was too cute in it to continue. Now, you steal it for her (as in, picking her up so she can reach it).

•And lastly, Law definitely thinks about Cora-san whenever he wonders how to act with the little girl, or if he’s being a good father. Thinks about how happy his father figure made him, and hopes to be like that for his daughter, too.

#trafalgar d water law x reader #trafalgar law x reader #trafalgar law #law x reader #one piece x reader #one piece fanfiction #non request #headcanons

[1autistictacticalrefrigerator]

Moments Worth Remembering 💝

A few days before Ghost’s birthday (which he dreaded each year), Soap had been in his office and found some old photos and a blank “Memory Book”. Ghost had bought it many years ago, hoping to fill it with happy memories- yet it was left untouched, the dust settled thick on the leather cover, sitting on the shelf. Soap had asked if he could borrow it, Ghost had told him it was blank.

Soap had said he didn’t mind. So Ghost let him take it.

Whats the worst that can happen?

. . .

When Soap found that book along with the few old photos, he knew exactly what to do with them. He asked Ghost if he could borrow them and Ghost had said yes. When he flipped through the book in Ghost’s office, he saw the book was entirely blank. Empty. Even the “This Book Belongs to..” was left blank. He was about to change that.

Soap had gathered the others, explaining he wanted to finally fill Ghost’s book with memories for his birthday, good memories worth remembering. Everyone helped.

Over the course of the few days before Ghost’s birthday, pictures were added to the book, signatures, sticky notes, drawings. Gaz had even gotten stickers to add to the pages along with whatever trinkets the team could find. And by the end of the day before Ghost’s birthday, the book was complete filled with all sorts of things.

Soap grinned at the result as he flipped through the pages that night, making sure all the spaces were filled before finally wrapping it up. A gift for Ghost on his birthday.

. . .

No one had mention Ghost’s birthday when the day arrived. He liked it that way. On his birthday he had completely distanced himself from everyone, nobody was about to get close to him when he was in such a vulnerable mental state. But that night when he returned to his office, he spotted a delicately wrapped gift on his desk.

Alarming. Ghost narrows his eyes as he walks over to it, inspecting it before carefully unwrapping it. Inside was the memory book Soap had wanted to borrow.

The fuck? Ghost had thought.

If this was a prank Ghost was definitely about to skin Soap alive. He calls Soap into his office, Ghost didn’t want to accuse anyone of pranks though. Because the way Soap’s mind bends- hell it could be any sort of gesture. Ghost wanted clarification.

“Did you like the gift Lt?” Soap asks, cheerfully.

“You returned the book, Johnny?”

Soap frowns, “Didn’t even look inside?”

Oh. Of course.

Ghost slowly opens the book and was greeted by the very first page.

This Book Belongs to: Simon R.

He holds his breath as he turns to the second page. Soap’s grin only grows wider when he saw Ghost’s reaction.

The inside of the book was a complete contrast compared to the outside. It was the night and day kind. The outside was dull, but the inside- pictures, notes, signatures. Everything was there.

“Happy birthday, Lt.” Soap says softly.

“Johnny..?”

“Aye, Lt?”

“Thank you.”

. . .

This was the gift that kept on giving, a lifeline for Ghost to hang onto. Something he’d value to the end of time. And he did. Because the book never once was on that shelf again. It was next to him, next to his desk, he had made room for it. Whenever Ghost was tired, or had a bad day, it was something to look back to.

A reminder that the world isn’t always so dull and merciless. And that there were happy moments.

Moments worth remembering.

( The whole thing feels rushed- Made this whole story last night, sleepy asf and didn’t feel like correcting it if theres any mistakes, its morning so- posted it now. Enjoy, ig? Lmfao. )

#call of duty #call of duty mw2 #cod #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #ghostsoap #soapghost

[missmielyhoran]

Baby Honey (2)

in which Y/N is searching for a photographer, Harry got a date and everyone is frustrated...

[Warning- Harry being an absolute downgrading idiot, return of an ex, ANGST, pinning, sexual tension, sexual themes but no smut, swearing, crying, mention of insecurities]

My wattpad \\ Masterlist \\ ig part 2

It was his second coffee of the day and somehow he still felt tired.

Harry was confused but more so he was angry at himself. They had a moment, a beautiful moment and he was going to kiss you if not for the interruption but that's not what made him angry it was the embarrassment on your face after he pushed you so hard that you almost fell.

What if you have fallen and hurt yourself? But in his defence he got scared. Intimacy was terrifying to Harry, let alone to his best friend with whom he had been in love for years.

It was two years ago when his heart fluttered for you like it had never before and he was with his then-girlfriend! It felt like shit. He felt even worse when his thoughts went south seeing you in that red dress you were wearing with matching red lipstick.

Soon after you and Harry became best friends and he broke up with his girlfriend cause it wasn't fair to her. She deserved someone loving not a douchebag in love with his best friend. But even after that something stopped him from telling you how he felt.

It was pathetic honestly cause everyone knew that both of you were in love with each other except the two of you. Harry looked at you like you hunged stars and moon in the sky like the sun shines because of you.

There was not a single day he would let go without seeing your face even if it was just on his small phone screen. From his phone gallery to his apartment walls to his heart everything was filled with your face.

Then why he couldn't just man up and tell you how he felt? He didn't know.

He sighed, picked up his guitar and camera, and settled on his unmade bed. He spent the whole night thinking what would have happened if he didn't fuck up, would you have stayed back and let him kiss you more? Maybe you had made out a bit more, perhaps it would have led to more where his glistening body would have cherished yours or maybe you would have just cuddled with him to sleep. But what was the matter of thinking now, you probably won't even want to see him. He didn't even get his daily 'Good morning' followed by a crass word text.

His fingers strummed the guitar strings and he sang the only song that has been playing in his head since yesterday night.

Run me in circles like you always do...

*****

Meanwhile, you were in your bed staring at the chipped white ceiling thinking why your love life has to be so fucked. Why couldn't you just fall in love with a guy you met at a bar or coffee shop or any of those cringy places romance novels define. Why couldn't you love anyone else who wasn't your best friend?

Groaning you turn on your side and hide more under the duvet. Your phone hadn't chimed once meaning there was no text from him. Was he regretting it? Was it just a spur-of-the-moment thing? It had to be. God everything will be so awkward now you thought to yourself.

You stuck your hand out of the duvet rest of your body still under the warm duvet. The phone screen was cold on your warm palm as you picked it up. It was almost 10 in the morning but that was not what caught your eye it was the reminder notification that was on your lock screen.

A few weeks ago you got an email from Calvin Klein to do a photo shoot for their latest package. You were stunned for minutes straight so much so you got Harry concerned thinking your grandma passed away but when you jumped from the couch and started squealing like a dolphin he got more concerned but knew it was something good.

After your reply, a package got delivered to your apartment a few days after. But since you had almost two weeks' time you put it away thinking you will do it on your good day, when your stomach wasn't bloated and your face looked good but what you didn't know was that day never came and now you had to post it by evening.

Panicking you sat up on the bed and unlocked your phone searching for the contact you needed, just as you find it you click on it. The call rings for about 3 seconds when he picks up and replies with a groggy voice.

"Aaron! I need your help. Right now" You exclaimed on the phone. You started getting off the bed and walking outside the bedroom.

"Y/N it's 9 in the morning talk a little less loud" He whined on the other side of the call making you roll your eyes.

"Anyways remember that CK photo shoot we talked ab-" "I can't do it" He said before you could complete your sentence.

"What do you mean can't do it" You let out a nervous laugh trying not to panic.

"Babe I'm home at my mum's place. Her arthritis has got worse so, I'm helping her." He said making you frown. Aaron was your go-to photographer so, you knew him and his family well. You knew how bad her arthritis could get sometimes not even being able to walk herself to the bathroom.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that A. Take care of her and yourself. I will figure something out" You said getting a hum in reply as if he had fallen back asleep again so you ended the call.

You fell back on your couch rubbing your forehead in stress. This is not how you imagined your Sunday to go. You thought of just sitting in bed the whole day mopping around about Harry not loving you back and then editing your video and falling back asleep but now you had a whole 2-hour footage to edit from, search for a photographer, take pictures, edit them also and post them.

You thought of texting your sister but then you remembered how tired she already was yesterday. Your sister worked a normal 9 to 5 job and her boss was a literal definition of an asshole. He always made her overwork, sometimes even asking her to come on Sundays cause the company was understaffed and rather than employing more people, he decided to torture her.

You felt guilty cause you also dumped all your feelings on her after you came home from Harry's and honestly you didn't want to face her after ugly crying to her over a boy.

So that left Harry.

Harry was uploading the video he just recorded and edited, it was short since the song itself is just a few seconds less than three minutes when he heard a knock on his door.

His heart started thumping against his chest from the thought of you being on the other side of the door. He won't admit it but he ran to the door so fast that even 5 steps made him out of breath.

But everything died down when instead of you it was Jordan standing in front of him with his signature beaming smile. He had a puffy jacket on to protect himself from the outside cold and his hand holding two go-to cups of coffee.

"H mate it's been so long" He said hugging him tightly. Jordan was the only person in his friend group who was taller than him making his face almost get squished in his sturdy chest. Jordan was the only person who was not common in their friend groups mostly his friends were the same as that yours except him.

"Why the long face? Not happy to see me?" He teased wiggling his eyebrows but Harry just rolled his eyes and walked back inside. Jordan followed him inside putting down cups on the kitchen counter. Harry wanted to duck him on the face from hearing his enthusiastic chirping voice but he controlled it.

"What do you want?" He asked sitting down on the couch propping his feet up on the table. "Why are you so moody is it because of Y/N?" Jordan asked, of course, his first guess was you. Jordan and Y/N didn't like each other and the reason is unknown, it was like they first saw each other and decided they aren't going to be friends.

"Yeah, I think I fucked up" He sighed and went on a full rant about everything that had happened at night. Jordan listened to everything intently, not interrupting once. When Harry finished he turned to him half of his face smushed against the back of the sofa, his lips in a pout.

He watched as a cheeky smirk appeared on Jordan's face. "What if you make her jealous?" He suggested. "Absolutely not" Harry shut the idea down before he could talk more.

"Hear me out. Look you just go on date with her, no need to take it further if you don't want to. Your friend group is so chatty that she will know that before you come back from the date and if she likes you this definitely going to bring out a reaction from her. Confront her after that and boom" He said and somehow his idea made sense to Harry.

"Also mate it's about time you get laid, when was the last time you fucked someone and not your hand" He said chuckling and making Harry flush. It was true he haven't been with anyone for the past two months almost. The last relationship he had was with Lindsey and that was one and a half years ago. It would definitely get a reaction out of you. You were a very emotional person but that didn't mean you cried easily (you did), it also meant you felt everything 100× let it be anger, sadness or happiness.

It could easily go south he knows but he was willing to take that risk.

"Alright I will do it" He said just as his phone's special notification went off which was just for you. He leapt towards his phone seeing a text from you a smile formed on his lips.

Baby Honey🍯: I know you're probably busy but I was just wondering if you could help me with a photoshoot of mine. Aaron is out of town and I don't want to bother Bella

Baby Honey🍯: but if you're busy it's genuinely no problem I will figure something out

He bit down on his lips trying not to smile like an idiot in front of Jason. Of course, he will help you, he would swim oceans to help if you needed him to.

Harry: Be there in 15.

"I have to go something important came up" Harry said as he locked his phone and slid it down his sweatpants pocket. He threw on the grey hoodie laying on the hand of the couch over his black t-shirt and pushed his curls back adjusting his bandana.

"Alright I will figure other stuff out. I know a girl you will like, just be on time" He said winking. Jordan gave Harry a side hug with goodbye and went his way. He kinda felt bad that Jordan came to spend time with him but oh well who is he in front of you?

*****

Harry couldn't walk fast enough to your apartment even if it was blazing cold out contrasting to the sunny day it was the day before. The cold wind was sending chills down his spine making him shiver but as your building came nearer his view a strange warmth started filling his chest.

He had Flynn cuddled to his chest cause he hated leaving him alone at home. Both of them would start getting separation anxiety after being away from each other for too long. But Flynn also hated walking so he had to carry him which was good cause he was small.

He ran upstairs as you lived on the 2nd floor and he didn't want to waste time waiting for the lift. He was a little out of breath when he knocked on the door but when the door opened he might as well have fainted.

You were standing there with your makeup and hair done to nine, soft waves falling on your shoulder and framing your face like an angel.

"Thank god you're on time" You said walking back inside that's when he noticed how you weren't wearing any pants and then he was sure he was about to faint.

It was rare for you to wear something revealing your leg. Harry was sure he was the only one of your friends (except your sister of course) who had seen you move around in shorts.

You had fought with insecurities your whole life. It didn't help that your sister was always the prettier one of the two and obviously it wasn't her fault but it was your mother who would always point out how your arms or legs looked like chickens or how Bella got all the beauty from your parents. So, after a time you stopped wearing anything that showed off your leg. It was recently when you stopped cutting off your food and regained a healthy relationship with it.

Harry was sure he would look like a creep if anyone else was in the room. You were saying something but all he could do was gawk at the tattoo on the back of your upper thigh near your butt.

"Are you even listening?" You said waving a hand in front of him. His whole face flushed red as he stumbled over his words.

"Ye-Yeah. Sorry I zoned out" He said clearing his throat and now actually listening to what you were saying and making mental notes.

You wanted an all-white aesthetic as the clothes were white with black detailing. Harry suggested taking pictures near the pillar between your bedroom door and the large window as it would have incredible lighting.

Harry situated the camera as you finished your makeup. He looked up seeing you carrying your vanity chair and putting it in front of the camera. He looked at you in confusion. "It's white but a mid shade between the wall and the clothes so it will tie it together," You said pointing at the wall and then to the chair. He gave you a 'fair enough' shrug and adjusted the settings on the camera.

"Alright camera is ready. Now pose Baby Honey" He said a tad more dramatic than needed but hey it got a giggle out of you. You sat down normally on the chair as Harry looked at you through the viewfinder of the camera. What he didn't expect was for you to take off your sweatshirt to reveal a crop top with a large CK logo on it. You stood up and threw the jumper on the couch.

You ruffled your hair a bit running your fingers softly through it. While Harry was just sitting on the floor with his mouth agape behind the camera. Nothing going through his head was holy oh far from it, a part of him felt bad for thinking like that about his best friend who trusted him with being vulnerable so he shoved it down a bit. But when you sat down again on the chair sideways and letting your legs dangle off while throwing your head back he forgot everything about feeling bad.

"Are you ready?" You asked him and although he wanted to say no cause how could he be ready for this ever he gave her a nod and started clicking pics.

After getting a few shots you decided to get into the next outfit. You were a bit hesitant about it, which he didn't understand but didn't ask anything and assured you that you will look good no matter what.

He was flicking through the pics he clicked when you came out of your room. Your face was red as a tomato but god you looked good. You were wearing a backless white top with the same thong as before but this time you had a hat over your head matching the bunny on top.

"Are you sure it's for CK and not Only fans?" He joked trying to lift up the mood but also to stop his dick from straining against his boxers. Making the matters worse he was wearing grey coloured sweatpants and if he got fully hard you will be able to see it and he didn't know if he would've been able to recover from that.

"Fuck you" You laughed, "Please do" He muttered under his breath. "What?" You asked thankfully not hearing it. He just shook his head and walked to you and sat on the floor.

It was going to be a long day for him.

You started with normal camera when he suggested taking one with polariod camera. You told him how you had one in your room so he went up to grab it. While in your room he took a breather, it was getting hard for him (literally) he needed to divert his mind.

He found the camera and went back outside, yiu were sitting on your knees on the floor playing with Flynn with sweetest smile on your face. Harry just wanted to grab your face and smother it with kisses.

"Honey" He called out to you and bought the polariod camera up to his face. You turned towards him as Flynn ran towards Harry. You smiled at him, your eyes crinkling on the edges with your smile lines showing and he decided that, that picture was meant for his eyes only.

*****

You finally finished shooting and now Harry was going through his phone looking at something while you sat on the counter eating strawberries as Flynn accompanied you on the floor eating from his own.

You thought about how this could be your normal routine possibly in the morning. You sitting on the counter as Harry made you coffee, munching on little snacks with Flynn, making out in between it which will proceed to little more as the kiss will deepen, his fingers brushing against your clothed pussy making you whine for more...

"Can you look after Flynn tonight?" Harry asked taking you out of your daydream. You cleared your throat and mind trying to understand what he said.

"Huh?" You asked again. "I said can you look after Flynn tonight?" He asked again.

"Of course, I can look after him but why?" You picked Flynn up from the counter and put him in your lap scratching the back of his neck.

"I'm going out tonight," He said, you furrowed your brows searching your brain to remember about any talk happening of hanging out. It wasn't any surprise to hang out outside of the group and nobody minded. It would be like a girls' or boys' night.

"With the boys you know drinks and stuff. Been so long" He lied, smacking himself on the back of his head. He saw how you looked at him suspiciously but let it go and honestly he was second-guessing the plan now. But Jordan had already sent him the location and time (just not telling him who the date is) and it would be rude to cancel.

"Okay we will have a sleepover tonight" You cooed at Flynn picking him up in the air, making him smile the biggest. And sweet Jesus did Harry feel like shit. It felt like someone had carved his heart out and beaten it with a hammer. How can he lie to you? He had never lied to you. Not even when he killed your hamster (he accidentally stepped on him) he told you that to your face knowing lying will have worse consequences. Yes, you didn't talk to him for days but in the end, you understood it was a mistake (seriously he was so small it was a miracle you didn't step on him).

He was going to pay for that he knew.

*****

His hands were shaking when he reached the restaurant. It wasn't a very fancy restaurant a bit more leaning towards casual so he dressed casually for it. Upon entering Harry gave Jordan's name as the reservation was done in his name.

The waiter led him to his seat. From afar he saw a figure sitting with shoulder-length blonde hair which looked familiar to him. He thanked the waiter and sat down, no one prepared him to see the face of the familiar blonde hair.

"Lindsey" He said almost in a whisper. "Harry! Hi Omg" she said so loud almost the whole restaurant heard her, people's heads turning to look at them.

"When Jordan said he had a date for me I was afraid it might be a creep but what a surprise" She clapped her hands happily. Harry gave her a tight-lipped smile cause he just realized how much deeper shit he is not only is he on a date but on a date with her.

He was a dead man.

"So what you bought you here? Couldn't find anyone special after me" She said in a teasing tone arching her eyebrows. Harry shook his head with a smile thinking of you. He did find his special person, he was just a coward who couldn't admit it.

"Why don't we order first?" He said. He was there might as well enjoy it. They were friends before dating after all and it's been so long since they saw each other anyway, they texted here and there but it was mostly on occasions like birthdays, Christmas or New Year's.

Lindsay was beautiful, the pretty brown eyes shiny blonde hair, sharp jaw but she was loud and not in a cute way. He can see why his college self would date her but as a somewhat adult he can't. She was charismatic though and very very flirty especially now that both of them were a few glasses of wine deep.

"You have gotten in good shape huh" She said tracing her index finger up his biceps to his chest.

"Mhm joined gym about a year ago" He said sipping the last bit of wine from his glass. Both of their eyes were on each other knowing well enough where this is going.

"Good. It has done wonders to your body" She said her fingers circling the swallows' tattoo near his collarbones.

"Haven't even seen anything though" He replied as he looked at the waiter behind her and motioned him to bring the bill.

"Why don't I take you to my place and show?" He said smirking matching the one she already had on hers.

"Thought you will never ask"

*****

Y/N was worried.

Flynn has been whining the whole night. He was fine when they had dinner and went to bed but just as she was about to fall asleep he started whining and scratching the door. You thought maybe he had to pee cause you took him on a walk after dinner but still you put on your jacket and walked him on the small lawn in front of the apartment building.

But when he started again after coming back you decided maybe it was for the best if you dropped him back at Harry's.

"Oh, you miss daddy don't you baby" You cooed at him in a baby voice putting on his jacket. It was the cutest jacket Harry bought for him. It was yellow with teddy bear-type fabric and the cutest part was the hood oh you wanted to squeeze him after seeing him in it for the first time.

It wasn't long after you reached Harry's apartment. The 15 minutes walk got your nose and cheeks red like tomatoes and cold. You thought of maybe sleeping at his cause you had no mind of going back outside in that cold.

You knocked on the door Flynn looked up at you with a big smile wagging his tail knowing he was back home.

"Your son-" words died in your mouth when you saw her. The same blonde hair, and brown eyes you wished to never see again but there she was in his T-shirt. Harry's T-shirt.

"He was whining so I had to bring him back" You said quickly putting Flynn down on the floor seeing him run inside as fast as he could with small legs.

Before any more words could be exchanged you turned around and walked no ran down the stairs. You didn't care if it was eight degrees outside or that your nose was still freezing or that Harry lived on the 10th floor and somehow you were running down every step.

It felt like your body was on autopilot you knew where you were going but your mind didn't pay attention to it. Tears were blurring your eyes making the path in front of you blurry. You finally gave up and sat on the stairs of a store and bawled your eyes out on cold night.

Harry let out a startled scream when something small jumped on his stomach but when he saw his small ball of fur his eyes softened and he chuckled.

"Alright chill out buddy" He laughed stopping Flynn from licking all over his face. It was when he sat down and cuddled with Harry did he realized where Flynn came from. If he was here that meant you also were and if you were that meant you saw her.

You knew.

*****

Thank you sm for the likes on the first part! I hope you like this one too.

Taglist- @ijinii @thatonefangirlbookworm

Like, Comment and Reblog. Also Talk to me, I would love to hear your thoughts<3

#harry styles writing #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x y/n #harry styles smut #harry styles series #friends to lovers #best friend harry #harry styles

[killakirby]

ephemeral (bang chan)

developer notes ☽: inspired by my ig for you page being bang chan bf edits...i did not ask to be depressed because i can't find a man suitable for my standards :) fuck u christopher for being so fine tonight

soundtrack☽: birdie - kota the friend

notifications☽: 818 words, fluff, not proofread, gnl!reader

"time is our only dilemma"

a warm yellow-toned ambient glow is cast within the bathroom from a small desk lamp that you’ve commandeered as a substitution to the harsh fluorescents of the room’s installed lights. a small bluetooth speaker rests on the countertop next to the lamp on its third to last volume setting cycling through a random spotify playlist you’ve selected. it’s probably one out of the hundreds of comfort character playlists you’d never tell a soul that you listen too.

but, you realize that chan’s most likely seen the embarrassing and unending list of the cutesy-fictional catered playlists you’ve become obsessed with in the previous weeks as he’s logged in to your spotify account on his phone. a few months ago, you discovered a new playlist hiding within your massive library that you didn’t add or create, entitled “songs i listen to remind me of you.” that was at the front of your recently played, the cover photo being a picture of you asleep on the couch in chan’s studio (a photo chan’s never shown you). when you clicked to investigate further, you were shocked to see the playlist filled with over a hundred songs, and a description filled to the word limit. tears filled your eyes as you read the romantic note chan had left for you to see, and you listened to the whole playlist while cleaning your entire apartment. there wasn’t a single moment that the heat left your flustered cheeks or the sweet smile left your face. and when you met with your boyfriend in person, you certain that he was blushing underneath his mask when you alerted him of your findings, and he revealed that he was going to surprise you with your specially curated mixtape on your next visit to his studio. 

when you asked why he was giving you such a sweet gift so randomly, his answer came without hesitation. chan said, “there doesn’t need to be a reason for me to express my love for you. of course this gift is meaningful enough for valentine’s day, or an anniversary, or your birthday, but any day i have with you is enough for me to treat you like the love of my life.”

and after a revelation like that, how could you remember the embarrassing fanfic-esque playlists you had downloaded to your phone? they literally don’t matter anymore, not when you have a whole dime piece, respectful, sexy, intelligent, thoughtful-ass christopher bang chan confessing his undying love for you.

that’s all to say that you probably should’ve selected that mixtape to play through tonight, but it’s too late to change that fact, as you would hate to disturb the bubble of space you’ve created in the bathroom to retrieve your phone from the bedroom. and to interrupt the peaceful bath you and chan are enjoying. it’s a rare night that chan was able to join you in your apartment instead of you going to his dorm to see him, and the night is made more precious at the fact that he fought his workaholic tendencies to join you earlier in the evening around seven pm rather than his usual appearance past midnight. and a spontaneous date night was suddenly underway; you and chan cooked dinner together made from the dregs of ingredients in your sparse fridge (grocery day is tomorrow), made progress on cleaning up your animal crossing island together, and even got a few episodes into a short anime you wanted to watch with him. a bath was the only reasonable option to end the cozy date night you both started.

the water is probably half-an-hour away from transitioning from warm to lukewarm, and the bubbles are starting to become sparse. you’re nestled in between his legs, back pressed against his muscled-pillowy chest, head resting aside one of his shoulders to avoid smushing shower cap against his face. chan’s head is propped on the shower tiles, his neck elongated and your fascinated with the view of his adam’s apple bobbing and throat swallowing as he speaks softly to you. his eyes are shut, but he opens them every time you speak to him, seeping with the adoration he has for you. his hands rest on your waist underneath the water, and every so often he squeezes you lighty, and traces patterns on your skin he only knows. eventually you two find yourself running out of things to talk about, but the silence that follows isn’t uncomfortable. you gladly allow your eyes to flutter closed, and chan begins humming softly; both of you are well aware that you should wrap up the bath, as you both still have early starts tomorrow morning, or rather–this morning.

moments like these are few and far for a man of chan’s lifestyle, and neither of you are going to be the one to cut it short. while this scene is ephemeral, that does not mean it is insignificant.

much love, <3 kirby !!!

© killakirby - piracy and plagiarism are not allowed. no reposts on any form of media

#kirby's crafts ˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗ #⋆｡°✩ drabble #✩...bang chan...✩ #☾...stray kids..☽ #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids x y/n #stray kids x gn reader #skz x reader #stray kids fluff #stray kids fanfic #stray kids drabble #bang chan #christopher bang #bang chan x reader #bang chan x y/n #skz x female reader #bang chan x female reader #bang chan drabble

[rainy-mars]

a bond across lifetimes, a true home

fic ig. It's almost 2am and I have ethubs on the brain. Pref all editions of the word love are seen platonically. Characters not the ccs either way

Deep breathing.

In and out.

He's gone.

It hurts.

He's slipped from delicate fingers, ghosting away from slender hands that try to grasp one last time, one last try, one last-

one last life.

just one.

If only.

It's always been him. Both of them. A dancing, winding pattern, slipping through each other's feeble grasps like sand swept away by the rolling waves, like voices caught in a blizzard, ripped out of their throats and away before they can dare greet each others ears.

Dancing around each other like swaying fronds of grass, two eagles locking talons but never long enough, never quite.

Talons slip from each others grasp in synchronization, falling apart and flying away, never letting sunbaked feathers greet the cool, refreshing water. Flying their separate ways but clinging on so tightly.

It's so fragile. So...

easy to break.

and yet the strongest thing.

They fight. Hurl TNT at small castles and lob arrows through the sky. But mirth dances in their eyes, in wide tooth-filled grins and a scar tugged at by the edges of a sweetness hidden away. Taken by time, a castle falls as does a kingdom.

They love. They love in the way they dance, axes swung with force hitting the ground next to the other, swords nicking a cheek or arm in a teasing draw of blood. Haunting melodies accompany their laughter, hidden away in packed snow, hidden away and separated, never quite close enough, "He loves me", "that.. hurts, actually."

They long. It's a quiet, hidden thing, hidden in small interactions, "You're happy?" "I am." He's happy too. His soul is bound, he doesn't hate it, he loves his bound but not in the same way. This love is the crackling of fire so hot and close, sweltering smoke pressing choking burns into his skin. But their love is quieter, it's beams of sun on a winter afternoon, shining through swaying pine branches, it's the moss that clings tighter than the cold. But oh how he burns.

They bond. It's a taut thing, tension laid between them, but they always find each other again. They find each other a mile in the sky, the wind brutally winding through fur collars and packed moss, and all too soon is one gone, all too soon does the moss shrivel and die, too soon, not enough time, never enough.

They're the furthest thing from distant. He has his allies. His two friends to place his trust to, to rest with the knowledge that his secrets are safe, and yet. They find each other again. They've wronged each other in the past. He feels sick, horrid, he promised he'd help- but he didn't. So love is showered upon the one he has no words to describe. Their alliance is held together by a thin string, by overwhelming guilty compliments and the beaming smile of a new bedroom and the snickers as he's declared the favorite. But their dance dictates, their swaying back and forth forces fate. He falls. Oh how he falls. An angel collapsing, wings turning to stone, bloody halo flickering out with so few words and the twice-slashed body of a man who wants nothing but to be home. But what is home?

Home, in that moment, was a base tucked in a mountain, a nest full of feathers and flowers tucked in a corner, a magma cube milling about an enclosure, the warping of a portal his song of sleep.Home isn't that, though.

Home is what's inside.

Home is a nest covered in feathers and flowers, hand-crafted and fallen, laughter like the sun itself and snarky remarks befitting of a snake who's teeth bare in defense of him.

Home is the tattered remain of a tie, unworn but kept either way, bloody and soot-stained, the stray pebbles of a tower crumbling.

Home is a photo with a heart etched into the frame, a grin of teeth and stripes and a ship bearing sails so proudly.

Home is a broken shield, letter painted in meticulous white, frosted metal edges leaving crumbling snowflakes clinging to his ice-cold skin.

Home is the call of war, falling in a final blaze, the call of his king fading to ringing ears.

...Home is not where he lives. Home is not a reinforced cabin, it's not a fort of snow, it's not a burning ship, it's not a tower, it's not huddled in a mountain.

Home is the call of those he calls friends.

And oh, he could never truly be home without wrapping a moss cloak around his cold cold shoulders, smiling as he fiddles with the golden clasp, closing his eyes and seeing someone he can't help but love.

"He loves me," was said so long ago, and it was true. It hurt when lightning split the sky and declared, you love him and he loves you and he is gone.

But it's still a dance. Their love is twined in their death all the same.

A back and forth. A flaming arrow, quick aim making its mark, suffocating flames and sizzling lava, a ticking clock, a plunge through the chest as he cries for a home that's so far away.

...

Etho has learned many things, in this series of bloodshed and betrayal.

But he never forgot how to love, and neither did Bdubs.

#Fanfic #Life series #ethubs #ethoslab #bdoubleo100 #I hardly have a clue as to what this is ngl #Ty for reading if you did tho #life series smp #trafficblr #traffic life

[breads-bakery]

- EUPHORIA

O6 - pilot !!

warnings: afab reader!!, time stamps might be a little jumbled up, description of birth , mental illness implied ,profanities,  slice of life , angst, mentions of drugs.  if any of these topics make you uncomfortable please do not read!

note : this is not proof read !!! SMALL CHAPTER, You can call it a filler ig :( TIME LINES ARE AND WILL BE JUMBLED UP ON PURPOSE !!! as i said before the series is v inspired by euphoria!! we start on a flashback!!!! MORE WILL BE REVEALED ON UPCOMING CHAPTERS. ps.. sorry for the very late update 😅

y/n’s inner monologues (in italics ) , past conversations ( in bold )

taglist: @sunoobabie @sunooscheeks @leeknow-knows  @shiberrysan @kyrkitten , @skzoddinaries , @pjongbb204 ( taglist open for now )

previous  || masterlist || next

AUGUST 6TH, 2001

HYBE UNIVERSITY HOSPITAL - MATERNITY WARD - DAYTIME

bright , buzzing specialty lights and various types of hospital fuss filled the labor room.

in the midst; a woman in her mid twenties, giving birth to a fetus, a fetus like any other , as it curls up, bracing itself to be torn away from the comfort of its home.

each contraction felt as if a bowling ball landed full force on the woman’s spine; and then, with the initial force continued throughout, the bowling ball would roll down her spine , like it was crushing it the whole way .

each time she’s squeezed, her body shudders as if shot with a taser gun; over and over and over, until it landed in her pelvic area with double the initial force , until baby y/n finally makes her bone crushing descent through the dark labyrinth of her mother.

baby y/n , barely seconds old, her tiny body covered in amniotic fluid , vernix caseosa and blood. her lungs fill with air, and her eyes finally blink open. she soon begins to wail with terror as she peaked her new surroundings. the shrill and piercing cry filled the room, that had gone silent for a while.

suddenly, a nipple is shoved in her tiny mouth. she sucks, and in an instant her eyes roll back in a drug-like haze.

. . . . . .

DECEMBER 6TH, 2021

Y/N’S BEDROOM - NIGHT TIME

y/n , now 20 years old, sits cross legged in her bed, at the dorm. her hands busy keeping her hair out of her face, as best as she can , as she snorts the crushed klonopin off her black-polished vanity dresser .

she leans back on her chair , taking a deep breath, as the benzo’s take effect .

at some point you make a choice about who you are and what you want.

every mistake, every mis-step, every dumb decision or dumb fuck. just own it and wear it like a fucking honor badge . create your own confidence or whatever.

y/n’s ekes out a druggy smile.

she takes out her phone, inserting her password quickly, before clicking the library app, rapidly scrolling through it. years and years of memories.

from soccer games to birthday parties to her family. sleepovers with best friends and stupid little prank videos . dance routines. a bunch of selfies. makeup. school.

from growing up to drinking excessive amounts of alcohol and restless nights.

the photos become more sexual, more obsessive, more focused on how she looks.

and then she stops on a specific picture, a messy haired teenage boy with his arm slung around her.

i had my first kiss at the age of twelve with my then best friend , park sunghoon . he was my only friend at the time, and i used to trust him wholeheartedly.

well i used to … until he replaced me with his new, better friends, who “weren’t fuck ups” and “bad influences ” - so lee heeseung a good influence haha - I FUCKING HATE LEE HEESEUNG

but don’t feel bad, park sunghoon became a part time alcoholic, part time stoned and a full time fucking asshole

y/n's phone dings several times indicating she received a few notifications, pulling her out off her thoughts .

her eye sight a little blurry as she clicks on the message notification, she blinks several times to try on focusing on the text messages in front of her.

y/n groans lowly, trying to get off her black-polished chair, her legs are a little wobbly. she leans against the wall for a minute, taking a few deep breaths before she opens her bedroom door.

she starts to head down the hallway, trying to find her balance and footing as the drug took effect.

she miraculously ends up to her front door, without stubbing her toes in any corners and opens the door to a freezing chenle. she grins widely at him, as if lost in a trace for a bit.

chenle pushes her aside as carefully as he could, entering the house and closing the front door.

" god it took you ten whole minutes to open the fucking door " he started complaining as he placed the bags he was holding on the ground, so he can take off and hang his coat .

y/n grins once again looking at the paper bags, snatching and running away with them to the kitchen. chenle blinks dramatically and following her.

" you whore those are for the both of us "

#enhypen #heeseung enhypen #heeseung imagine #lee heeseung #heeseung #heeseung smut #enhypen imagines #enhypen smut #enhypen smau #heeseung enhypen smau #heeseung enhypen smut #heeseung suggestive #heeseung enhypen imagines #euphoria by breads bakery #euphoria smau #heeseung x y/n #heeseung x you #heeseung x reader #pocketz #enhypen 02z

[imikhailotakeyouian]

Hey Elisa! How are you doing today? ✨ I came up with a few questions about I&M (if all of them is too much just pick a fav) 🥰

Headcanon challenge:

1. Besides “Mick” and “Mickey”, what’s Ian nickname for Mickey? From all the nicknames Mickey calls him , what’s Ian’s favorite?

2. What’s the story behind Mickey’s knuckle tattoos? (When / how / by who) When Ian gets a tattoo for Mickey, what is it / on what occasion?

3. Random turn-on for Mickey and a random turn-on for Ian? (Bonus: something that really shouldn’t be a turn on but is)

4. What’s their Instagram @ ? When did they start following each other?

5. If they get a pet, is it a dog (who walks it more often?) or a cat (who cuddles with it more often) ? 

Hellooooooo! I missed you! <3

Oh, I love these kinds of questions!!! Thank you!

Let's see...

Look I know it's not original but I am a total sucker for "Baby". When Ian called him Baby in S11 I was whining like a wee dog. Something we didn't hear in the tv show otherwise, let's see. Ok, so the premise is that Ian loves when Mickey calls him nicknames, especially related to him being ginger (because he knows how Mickey loves that too), but I imagine Mickey calling him with Spanish nicknames (Rojo, el Gingero, Bonito) and NOT liking them because he gets jealous of possible (and probably made up lol) ex Mexican lovers so Ian burst out a "YO! Tiny but mighty! SHUT UP!" and generally speaking other nicknames would be related on Mickey being shorter than him XD once Ian is drunk and calls Mickey "Pokemon" because of Pocket-Monster and Mickey pretends to be furious but he actually likes it u.u Ian's favorite nickname from Mickey is "Red", because it's classic, it's old-but-gold, or "Hot Stuff", or "RHCP" (Red Hot Chili Pepper) but he also loves all the sweet ones he gets when Mickey is drunk or high and goes all sweet like "Sugar Daddy" (because he is Ian's "Baby"), "Sweetie", even "Love". Ian likes the sweetness of them but he will always prefer the sarcastic ones because he knows Mickey says them with all the love charge he can anyway.

He was so young he didn't want to do them. He was like 11 or something but Terry forced him to ("No son of mine is a fucking pussy, you'll get them today"), from some Milkovich cousin (because who would ink such a young boy that was clearly forced into it otherwise?) and when he had to pick which words he picked "FUCK U-UP" with the promise that those very inked fists will fuck Terry's face up one day in the future. He was so used to see them he eventually forget about them, and he thought about covering them only when he is in his 30s, but Ian confesses that he loves them and couldn't imagine Mickey's hands without them, so he keeps them forever <3

For Mickey: every time Ian curses/uses fowl language. I mean not like the regular "Fuck!" for the small things, but when he gets really pissed off and just lets it go with a long sequence of profanities. It goes straight to Mickey's dick. For Ian: when Mickey is jealous -which doesn't happen often, because he knows Ian is hot so he is not jealous whenever someone looks at him, it would be unrealistic, but if someone really hits on Ian then he goes nuclear and starts say that Ian is his fucking husband, don't you dare touching him, I'll fuck you up, etc... and generally speaking, every time Mickey calls him "husband" especially in public :D

I don't see Ian&Mickey from the canon being Instagram users to be honest, while I totally, utterly, LOVE social media AUs (like yes please gimme!). Canonically, let's see, I would say that Ian open one IG account during lockdown out of boredom and though Mickey doesn't open one he tells Ian to make a joined account (still for Terry's sake) so Ian creates @mr-and-mr-gallavich and the Bio is like: Ian&Mickey Gallavich Husbands Love wins, a$$hole! And what starts like a fuck off to Terry actually will be filled with plenty of photos of Mickey playing with Franny during lockdown, of them with silly faces, then of them in their new flat, their new business, their new cats, their kids, etc etc <3

While I love the fanon dog "Bazooka", I am more of a huge fan of Mickey as cat-daddy. He is a cat-daddy in the majority of my fics too (Lizzo cat, I miss you!), and Mickey is the one who spoil them more, he is daddy. While Ian is the pet's punching ball :'D or better, scratcher/cat-tree ahahah! They obey to Mickey but they love the both of them u.u

#this was fun! #thanks for asking! #gallavich headcanons #ask box

[daesungindistress]

I’m so sorry about all the OT5 stans in your inbox, but would be be able to pick up on the G Dragon instagram likes ask please? I feel super confused by why he’s liking Seungri and Nyongtory posts this shit is tormenting me

Hey anon, sorry you're feeling tormented by this. Don't be, okay? Don't let the warped perspective of those weirdos get to you.

Disclaimer: I haven't seen everything GD is liking on IG because, unlike some people, I don't feel the need to track his every step on social media just to sell a story of him being ride or die for a shameless liar, selfish prick, and now convicted sex offender who quit the band over three years ago. But I have seen some things, and heard whisperings of others. And the day you sent me your initial ask about this, I ventured over to the swampy side of VIP Twitter to investigate... and here are my observations.

First, my advice to you and everyone else in this clusterfuck of a fandom is to always exercise extreme skepticism when faced with claims by supporters of Seungri and deniers of reality known as OT5. They've spent the last three and a half years proving themselves consistently and passionately wrong about everything Seungri and BB, insisting on his innocence, swearing that the group was nothing and would never go on without him, squandering so many opportunities to support the remaining members on their continuing journey. Do not blindly accept their labeling; it's how they control the narrative, and it always comes back to bite them.

To answer your question: GD isn't liking "Seungri posts" or "Seungri solo shots," as you put it previously. Just because that's how his fans have pitched it doesn't make it correct; they're only showing you half the picture, and in fact are withholding information from you. What GD is liking are photos (and photosets) of himself, his work, his merch. Collections of images from his most recent pictorial with Vogue, reposts of his PEACEMINUSONE products, etc. Sadly, "fans" with an agenda (many of them shippers) discovered a few weeks ago that they could sneak a solo pic or two of Seungri into these photosets filled with pictures of GD, usually hidden at the very end, buried 9 pics deep, with the expectation that he wouldn't take the time to scroll that far given his borderline manic activity on IG at the time. They did this hoping he wouldn't notice, thinking they could trick him into liking it, then use it as fuel for their Nyongtory fantasies. They'd lay the trap, tag his account, xxxibgdrgn, and wait.

And it's worked. When they get that coveted like they scroll through their photoset full of GD pics and screenshot only the pic of Seungri, with GD's seal of approval proudly displayed beneath, and pass those screenshots around, pitching it as "GD liked Seungri pics" to anyone willing to swallow it.

He has also been liking clips from his old tour vids (e.g., MOTTE 2017), collabs with other artists, and yes! BIGBANG. In the case of old BB videos (that happen to include Seungri, because yeah, he was there and part of their recorded history) even if Seungri appears in the video for only a moment, OT5s will painstakingly pause the video on his close-ups and present it as if the clip was entirely about him, as if that and nothing else was what GD was focused on when he liked it, nevermind that the guy was only onscreen for a second or two. It's very calculated, what they're doing, deliberately misleading, and potentially damaging, should anyone make the mistake of taking their games of make-believe seriously.

What makes this so exhausting is nothing about this deranged behavior is new. Nothing. When Youngbae posted a solo cam very clearly centered on himself from BIGBANG's Last Dance tour on IG in early 2020, during preparations for Coachella, Seungri appeared in the background of one shot for a fraction of a second. And you know what those fans did, don't you? They timed it just right, captured a single, blurry frame that if you squinted may or may not have been him, and claimed Youngbae had posted a "video of Seungri," which to them equaled full support. Came here to taunt me about it too, anonymously. Insanity.

They did the same when TOP posted a clip of the chorus from the Fantastic Baby music video later that same year, in his caption cracking a silly joke about having predicted everyone masking up in a pandemic. I'm sure you can guess which split-second shot this fandom's nutcases chose to focus on, determined as always to make everything the BIGBANG members do wholly about someone it's not. They're exactly as psychotic about the matter today as they were back then. Even more so, I'd argue, given everything that's transpired in the two years since.

On that note, before anyone says, "but GD liked OT5 pics," do keep in mind he has also liked OT4 pics, i.e., BIGBANG group photos with Seungri cropped out (if he was even there to begin with). Including this one, in which the KVIP who posted it described the members pictured here as the "whole group" and expressed her wish to see them together again.

Side note: when GD's IG liking spree first began, some OT4s speculated that he may not have been taking the time to read the captions on some of the posts he was liking. OT5s clowned them for that. Then, when GD liked this OT4 pic, OT5s said, in a hilarious imitation of the very OT4s they'd been laughing at, "Well, maybe he didn't read the caption." lol. So, uh, where does this leave us? Agreeing on something for once? Or all just clowning ourselves and each other?

Of course, it is possible that as these people are getting bolder GD may be noticing the shots of Seungri that they're slipping into his photosets... and just doesn't care. He may know full well what a few maniacs will make of it as he browses through fans' offerings and pauses over familiar imagery from his and his group's past and present, and now moving more confidently than he has in years, isn't so concerned about appearances as to let that stop him.

I don't know, can't say for sure. But you know what, if that's the case, then at this point I'm okay with it. BIGBANG have just had their first four-member comeback. It's finally happened, they've made their position clear, as did Seungri when he withdrew from the industry several years ago (his eventual conviction combined w/ prison time just hammered the point home). If some fans haven't gotten the hint by now, they never will, and it's unreasonable and unfair to expect the BB members to tiptoe around their past music/concerts/memories/experiences forever, walking on eggshells for fear of encountering sight, sound, or mention of Seungri just to avoid triggering a few crazies. Because like it or not, those people will always find ways to connect him to BIGBANG. That's how serious this has become to them. Unfortunately, for the truly sick in the head, delusions don't just end. But as for BIGBANG, they have a new beginning to get underway. As I said in a previous ask reply: keep the memories but move on.

Unless prompted somehow, I don't always feel a need to draw attention to the OT4 occurrences, such as when GD liked the pic above. That was weeks ago, I've known about it since the day it happened, but am only bringing it up now because it's relevant to your question. We have nothing to prove. While it's certainly satisfying, and funny, to see the members cut Seungri out of past pics like TOP did in January, I don't believe in policing the BB members' access to their memories, especially something as frivolous as Instagram likes. All but the most militant of OT4 VIPs still periodically engage positively with old BB content involving five members -- yep, that includes KVIPs -- because we're not confusing past with present, and for those that find the past presence of the former fifth member especially unpleasant, well, it isn't difficult to tune out, overlook, or altogether ignore him and concentrate on the others. Retired guy aside, there's plenty about pre-2019 BIGBANG to like.

TLDR; I would strongly caution against turning GD's Instagram likes into statements. Let him be and let the guy have his memories now that the success of Still Life has shown it's safe to do so. From what I've seen, aside from you and maybe one other, OT4 VIPs are generally just pleased to see him interacting with fans and BIGBANG content again after years of what, to me at least, seemed like avoidance. We're not threatened by that; we're encouraged, happy to see him happy and free, and hopeful that it means more good things are in store for him and the group in the near future. "Happier times are coming."

#ask #anon #sorry if this is a little disorganized I'm just so tired of it all #bigbang and vips will never be free of the cult of seungri

[hoebaring]

Sorrowful Love (Two Shot) | Jung Hoseok

"There's no sorrow that lasts forever and there is no love that lasts forever." He says, hands in his pocket looking at the beautiful girl walking beside him. "I say there is" she replies as their eyes meet. "Which one love or sorrow?" "A sorrowful love"

Tags/Warnings :- Angst, heartbreak, mentions of idol!hoseok, breakups, basically emotional PAIN, so y'all please be ready to cry before you start reading it, there might be a part 2, I warned you guys. That's all, ig. Enjoy..? 😆😭

Cross posted on Wattpad

Written by Author A

Word count :- 1.8k Words

Masterlist

CRUSH 'Beautiful' 01:43 ━━━━●───── 4:14 ⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻ ılıılıılıılıılıılı ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮

CHANYEOL 'Stay With Me' (Ft. Punch) 01:43 ━━━━●───── 4:14 ⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻ ılıılıılıılıılıılı ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮

****

|| 𝕾𝖔𝖗𝖗𝖔𝖜𝖋𝖚𝖑 𝕷𝖔𝖛𝖊 ||

(A/N :- BOLD is the journal)

There's no sorrow that lasts forever and there is no love that lasts forever. He was right after all. She writes down on the last page of her journal. The journal she started solely because of the man who was now the cause of the tears that flow down her face.

With a sigh, she turns to the first page, the start of their love. She had written down in the journal is every moment they spent together with passionate feelings, from the first meet to the last which wasn't long before, just a few hours ago. The end of them. The end of everything.

As she stares at the playful picture attached to the hard bound cover of the book, a pained smile makes its way onto her face. Their first date. At an amusement park. Cliché, but beautiful. The photo was funny to say the least, some ice cream on her nose, eyes widened in shock from the embarrassment she had to face, and him beaming at the camera with a smile that reminded her of the cheerful sun.

Yet now, opposed to the bright feelings that the picture portrays, a tear trickles down her cheek, dramatically staining his face on the polaroid.

She opened the book filled with beautiful and precious memories. She flips through the first few pages of the book, turning to a page that held so much meaning to her. It read 16/06/XXXX, it was their prom day. The day when she had told him about her feelings.

Outside the building from where you could hear loud music with people dancing to the beat, stood a girl adorn in a baby blue gown. The moon light reflected on the small gems present on the gown made her glimmer. She fidgeted with the end of her puffed sleeves as she waited for someone.

Someone who means the whole world to her, whom she could have all sorts of interesting conversations with, someone she had always trusted and someone who she was ready to trust all over again.

A series of hurried footsteps approached her, making her turn. 

"Hey, everything okay?" Hoseok asked breathing heavily, making Ava aware of the fact that he had run all the way here. She cracked a small smile.

"Yeah, I just have something to say," she says, looking at the sky, avoiding any sort of eye contact.

"Go on then," he replies making his way next to her, hands in his pocket as he also, looked at the night sky.

"I..um.." Ava begins, trying her best not to stutter, her legs shaking as she held the side of her dress.

"I like you," She choked out, turning to the man next to her, only to see him tilt his head still looking at the sky.

"Sure," he simply replied, causing Ava to look at him in pure disbelief. 

"What do you mean by 'sure'?" she questioned, her heart beating extremely fast because of the annoying suspense.

"The more I react the more nervous you're going to get." he says, monotonously, not moving an inch, the bright moon light, as if they were in a play, acted like the stop light. They stood in silence with the gentle breeze blowing and making a soft whistling sound.

"Just tell me if it's a yes or no." she pleaded impatiently, waiting for a proper answer.

"Yes," he spoke, still not making eye contact. 

"W-what?" Ava said, staring at him with wide eyes. She was not expecting this, since she had prepared herself for a rejection and now, she had no idea how to react.

"I said yes, we should date." he stated, finally looking at her. She noticed the reddish-pink tint on his cheeks, the way his jet black hair was gelled back revealing his forehead. How the moon light illuminated his side profile ever so gently. Even with the intense music in the background, to them it was a silent and peaceful moment as they stared at each other.

The restof the page was just about the extreme bliss and euphoria she felt when shewent to bed later that night, and thought of the surprisingly lovely day she had. Oh! How excited she was to meet him the next day.

Ava flips through a few more pages, refreshing the memories of how cheesy they were. She had penned down ever single thing. Like the one time they winked at each other throughout class or the other time when her friends had forced them to sit together for lunch. A sad chuckle left her lips. 

Turning another page, she came to their first proper date at an amusement park. 

It had almost been a month now and as a break from their exam preparation, Hoseok had taken her to a nearby amusement park. 

Fitted in a pair of mom jeans and a soft yellow top, there sat Ava waiting for Hoseok to get them ice-cream. It was a beautiful, sunny day filled with laughter and screams from the little excited kids that frolicked around the park. She couldn't believe that the day had already come to an end. 

The sky was hues of blue and purple. They had stayed this late so that they could have a romantic ride on the Ferris wheel, but since it wasn't running anymore they had come here to get their second round of ice-cream. 

"There you go" Hoseok said as he handed her the softie dipped in chocolate, just how she liked it. Sitting beside her, he gets his phone out to click a photo.

"Ava! Look here," Hecalls out for her and clicks a picture causing her to turn with such swiftnessthat a little bit of the ice-cream smudges on her nose making her eyes widen.

"I wasn't ready Hobi!!" She spoke rising her voice slightly, you would expect her to be slightly annoyed right? But nope, instead she had a smile on her face; happy because of the fact that Hobi, her Hobi, was having a good laugh because of something she had done. 

The way his eyes closed when he laughed, revealing his hidden dimples. How every time she looked at his smile all she could think of was the sun. The bright laughter filled the air as she also giggled a little. 

Another pained smile, another sad chuckle left her lips as she stared at the page, wondering what had happened to them now? Sure they had ended things on a good, hopeful note but that didn't mean she was not sad, or heart broken.

Flipping through another good thirty pages or so, she came to a page that she had written on a few day ago, a weird and curious conversation. Something that she had not thought of so deeply then, a conversation in which she felt proud of her witty reply.

It was beautiful morning. The duo decided to walk to their school together. They kicked the stones on their path whilst holding hands. They talked about anything and everything, be it the birds chirping or how badly they wanted their math teacher to be absent so that they didn't have to give their test. 

When the topic of shows came up, they bonded over the one drama she loved with her whole heart, the one with a sad love story, a genre she always enjoyed when she read books or watched series.

"And then he gets shot in front of her, but later towards the end she realizes that she has to move on." Ava finishes with her hand still mid air.

"That's why I say," Hoseok begins.

"There's no sorrow that lasts forever and there is no love that lasts forever." He continued, placing his free hand in his pocket as he looked at the beautiful girl walking beside him.

"I say there is," She replies, as their eyes meet.

"Which one ? Love or sorrow?" He asks, as they near their class.

"A sorrowful love." She replies with a slight shrug, as they enter their class, take their respective seats, and wait for the teacher to begin.

Her eyes water again as she realizes the journal is coming to an end, not wanting to cry anymore she directly skips to the end.

There she stood, in front of her house, the cool evening winds blew through her, causing her to rub hands together in an attempt to warm them up. It was only five in the evening and Hoseok had asked her to meet up in front of her house, saying he had something important to say.

"Hey!" She greeted, making her way towards him.

"Hey" He said, sounding pretty tired.

"What is it?" She got straight to the point knowing he had just got back from practice and that they didn't have much time before he had to go back to the company.

"I want to break up." He said with a straight face, which was in contrast to the confused and hurt expression Ava wore. 

"It is a prank right? The others are hiding, aren't they?" She asked. More like tried to convince herself that he was just joking around with her, as the result of his and the boys' dares.

"No, I am serious Ava, but before you say anything, please let me explain." He spoke as both his hands gestured her to wait and let him complete.

"We are going to debut in a few months and I think I will not be able to give you the time and love you deserve. Neither will I be able to focus on performing. This might sound extremely cliché, but when I am fully settled-" She cut him off shaking her head vigorously, teary eyes, runny nose and cheeks cold.

"No, you don't have to come find me, I don't want you to waste your time and energy in finding me, not when I know I will move on and will be living the life I want " she said choking on her tears, as she turned her heels and left without another word or waiting for him to say anything.

She closed the book and looked at the clock. It was ten. Her usual bed time. She set the book on a table and took a quick bath before changing into her saturn pajamas. She turned the lights off and got under the sheets of her soft bed. Closing her eyes she thought 

She will get over it. She promised him. She promised herself. She promised that she would live the life she wanted, that she would go after her all her dreams. 

Well- not all of her dreams.. sadly, he was no longer something she could go after. Not for now, at least.

♥♥♥♥

#idolhoseok #hoseok #bangtan #bts #btsfanfic #angst #heartbreak #fanfic #hoseokangst #sad #breakups #hoseokfanfic #junghoseok #jung hoseok #bangtanangstfanfic #fanficangst #romance #sadromance #mightbeaduology #idkanymore #crywithme

[fyodorsimp]

blade x dan heng

yah so, this was meant to be a joke but.. if you guys like it ig I’ll make a part 2?

The shiny, sharp tip of Blade’s sword was firmly positioned at Dan Heng’s chest, almost making him bleed. Blade silently muttered, “This is your end, Imbibitor Lunae.” Dan Heng slowly pushed Blade’s sword away as his gaze softened, filled with bitter sadness and regret. He managed to release a few words, “We don't have to fight like this, Blade.” Water Drops echoed in the empty night, no sounds being made by any sort of living creature. They look each other in the eyes for a few seconds before awkwardly looking away, Blade pulls himself together and walks away into the bleeding, black ink. 

(A few days later)

In the astral express, Dan Heng was wondering what really happened that night, why couldn't he get it out of his head? March 7th ran up to him asking if he was okay, he hadn't talked the whole day. “Hey Dan Heng, are you alright? I was just taking some photos and I noticed you in the corner here.” Dan Heng looked up at her saying, “It's nothing important. Don't worry about me, March.” He looked back at the ceiling, getting lost in his thoughts again. They arrived at Belobog but Dan Heng decided to go to the Outlying Snowy Plains for a bit. Dan Heng sees an ominous shadow near a dead tree, curious to see what it was he proceeded to get closer. As he got closer the shadow disappeared, breaking a branch of the tree in the process. He feels a tap on his shoulder, barely flinching. He turns around only to see none other than Blade himself. Blade gazes at him, he growls before saying bluntly, “let's finish what we didn't yesterday.” He waits a while for Dan Heng to reply only for him to say, “Blade, I don't want to fight with you anymore. I only want the best for you.” He looks a little bit shy, he said in a soft tone. Blade scoffs, turning his head away saying “Really? The best for me?”... The conversation paused for at least 3 minutes before Dan Heng grabbed onto his waist, turning his head back around and getting a little closer. Blade stares at him with an eyebrow raised and says softly, “Dan Heng… what are you doing?”. Dan Heng put his finger on Blade's lips, shushing him gently. Blade seemed confused on what Dan Heng was doing.. but it felt… unusually… nice? Dan Heng decided to make the big move and leaned in for a kiss, seeing if Blade would resist or not. Blade leaned into the kiss, putting his hand behind Dan Heng’s head before breaking the kiss and pushing Dan Heng’s head back, crossing his arms. Dan Heng’s face flushed red as he realized what he had done. Blade glanced at Dan Heng, before clearing his throat. “You saw nothing, and did nothing.” He replied, closing his eyes for a second. Dan Heng was starting to notice the cold, but not sure whether he should leave the moment just yet.  Blade unsheathed his sword, and threw it next to Dan Heng's head, hitting the tree behind him. “Be lucky I have mercy on you.” Dan Heng replied reluctantly, “I have to get back to Belobog now, Blade. I don't have time to fight again…” blade scoffed, walking past him and grabbing his sword on the tree “of course you don’t, you and your stupid astral express..”

“What? Do you miss me or something?” Dan Heng whispered teasingly. “Pfftt, as if. I would never miss such a freak like you.” Blade glanced at him. Dan Heng was losing patience, so as he was walking away he replied with “Okay, Blade.”. While Dan Heng was leaving, Blade yelled out to him “COWARD!” Before turning back to his sword, inspecting it. Dan Heng ignored his cold comment, he had to go back to Belobog to meet up with Seele, Bronya, March and Stelle.

#dan heng #imbibitor lunae #dan heng imbibitor lunae #dan heng il #blade hsr #blade x dan heng #sword play

[jess-moloney]

Looking at older photos, there is such as difference in how she looks. If she does have an eating disorder, that is such a toxic mix to be around when you are dealing with sobriety. It also does not help Jamie with his self esteem issues. We all know he is handsome but he may not see himself that way. From seeing what he has been saying about her being the only person that puts up with him. He feels possibly he is not worthy of a better partner. I remember the one video he did with the tweets. He was so genuinely touched about being called beautiful. This whole image change makes me think is she belittling him in some way. Possibly saying he is not masculine enough and that he has to change himself. I hope not as she does not need to bring Jamie down with her. This may explain the early therapy in their relationship. It just seems toxic all around. It is not good for Jamie's sobriety and mental well being. He seems like a sensitive soul. It does look like she got Buccal Fat Removal and also lip fillers. Not saying that to be mean. Just looking at before pics. Her face was more filled out, brown hair. I hope Jamie will be okay. This is all a recipe for disaster.

From seeing what he has been saying about her being the only person that puts up with him.

When I heard him say this it was red flags to me. That's something you say about someone you're also in a relationship with? That they put up with you? It doesn't sound like love it sounds like you are desperate to have a partner and you think your serious flaws make you entirely unlovable. Or they actually do. I don't know Jamie personally, maybe he is insufferable in a relationship but even if he is (or isn't) he shouldn't be clinging to someone like that just because they put up with him. That's a horrible basis for a relationship.

He feels possibly he is not worthy of a better partner.

I think if he had a better sense of self-worth and self-esteem he'd have already gotten rid of this woman. It seems obvious to quite a few people that she's toxic and looking more into it all the evidence seems to line up to the same conclusion. I do think he must have self-esteem issues to end up with a person like this. An ever-changing plastic chameleon with unhealthy distorted issues herself, by her own admission.

This may explain the early therapy in their relationship.

I don't even know why he would bother with therapy this early in the relationship. Shouldn't this be a huge red flag that it's bad? If you're only a few years into something like this and doing therapy then it seems that the more viable solution is to end the relationship. Why would you want to work on something that is so bad from the start? Why be desperate to keep someone like that who you've not been with for that long? Unless she's convincing him he's the problem and that he needs to be fixed and she's done nothing wrong. The apology video he liked on IG appears to be research on what that sort of manipulation and gaslighting looks like when a partner uses an apology against you. Does Jess do that to him? If he's aware of that much then why is he not aware that leaving her is the better option than trying to work it out? A narcissist is always going to be a narcissist he's not going to change her.

It does look like she got Buccal Fat Removal and also lip fillers.

If she has an eating disorder or not it's obvious that she has body image issues herself. Which she may be transferring onto Jamie with this masculine cowboy thing that she seems to be pushing him into. Someone who makes their face look that unnatural in a bid to be beautiful (or what they think is beautiful) cannot possibly be a good advisor for someone else on what they should be doing. If she's domineering, has her own body issues, and is taking it out on him then that's a recipe for disaster.

#jess moloney #jamie campbell bower #jamie bower #mail #tw: eating disorders #since you've demanded I trigger warn everything

[mapof-mysoul]

K-POP ?

It's been a while, but here I am. I was under a lot of stress as I was getting a new job. I started this week and though i haven't done much besides training. I'm excited about the possibility. I have been writing and reading and existing. My mind seems clearer not without its usual hurricane  of thoughts but just enough for me to see out from where I stand in its eye. 

Enough for the constant ache to be dulled. Kinda like what KPOP does to me. 

Weird transition but okay. I'll talk about KPOP.

As I write this I'm listening to BTS and Lee Know from StrayKids is commenting on bubble. So my reason for getting into KPOP BTS and my reason for spiraling down its rabbit hole SKZ. I thought it was a small hyper fixation as most things are for me. But a year and a half later here we are multi stan and all.

I joined this world just as BTS was announcing its group hiatus. Which sucked but I think I was lucky also. I get to experience them all for the grammys together and I get to learn them though their own individual music and schedules. I get to see them each for who they are as artists outside of BTS global phenomenon. I get to go back and see their struggles and growth knowing how it will all turn out.

I do however miss those who have enlisted and i'll miss those who still have to enlist. But thanks to BTS I have 5 individual artists I love and soon that will be 7 once JK and V  release their solos.

Thanks to them opening the door I found SKZ, which includes 8 chaotic guys whose music, energy and personalities also make me feel. 

When your mind is a mess to be pulled out of that is as close to euphoric as it gets. 

Yes there are other groups I enjoy. But these particular two make me feel seen, heard and understood. Yes they speak a language I'm struggling to learn but that's the thing they have opened me up to a culture and side of the world i never would have otherwise thought of learning about. Food, culture, language, customs and history are only a few of the things I've allowed myself to start learning. I want to understand them fully. 

The effort it takes is worth it. When you learn the meaning behind lyrics or remarks they make. Whether it's Love Yourself or Youtiful, I am grateful for the feelings behind these songs. I am grateful that I can know this world of BTS and SKZ and get immersed in so much more than their beauty. I mean yeah it's great to look at them, collect photo cards, albums or place posters on my wall. But when I look at those things I remember their words of kindness. 

I remember JK talking about how he missed us. Or Bang Chan seeing us weekly for Channies room. Things they don't have to do. Eat Jin or Asmr with Felix. Jimin and his little building lives or I.N drinking way too many energy drinks. They chose us as much as we chose them. Taehyung and Lee Know taking time to answer comments on their respective platforms. Namjoon's song recommendations on IG or Yoongi telling us the meanings of his songs regardless of how painful it must be for him to relive it. Hyunjin and Jhope dancing across my screen. Or Changbins laughter. Seungmins sacrasm and jokes and Hans' vulnerability.

These mens gentle masculinity is what has led most of us to feel closer to them then other western artists.

I love western music, from pop to rock, classic, jazz and indie but there is also rap and hip hop R & B on my playlist. As a latina i listen to bachata and ballads, reggaeton or merengue and salsa. My playlist has at least 11 languages on it. 

Can you tell I love music?

As a writer, feeling and hearing an emotion can fill me with it. I dont have to know the language, take one of my favorite songs by BTS' Min Yoongi or in this case his alias Agust D, The Last. 

The first time i heard it i cried, no lyrical reference not in either language i know. Just me feeling exhausted from the pain inside myself. Unable to cry at that point. Maybe it was the angsty pain in his voice but I knew I felt it too. I cried. Silent tears covering my cheeks. I was not alone. When I looked up the lyrics I sobbed again, because my soul understood before my mind could. He himself says music doesn't have a language. 

When I had the opportunity to see him in concert I jumped. Because he is my bias after all. I cried twice, once during Amygdala, because I knew exactly what he meant. Our traumas looked different but their effects were the same. I cried again during Snooze as he repeated over and over and over how "everything was going to be okay". As he reminded me to lean on him to take a break, and then when i'm ready pursue my dream once again. It felt good to hear it in person. But I didn't cry during The Last like I thought I would. Instead I smiled because that was a song that connected him and I and millions of people around the world. 

I wasn't an emotional mess the entire time. Instead I screamed in anger during Burn It, a song that gave way to that kind of behavior as well as a lot of his others. But hearing him pause to say hey “from now on i'll write with less anger”. Reminded me of my own writing journey. Of how I too have written angry and dark and pained. But like him I too have begun to step out of that. When im asked why Min Yoongi, its because he spoke to a part of me i thought would never heal and he was there when when it started to. Im not saying he saved me but it really fucking helped to hear someone, like him say "yeah same".

It wasn't just him, my SKZ bias Bang Chan. Might not have done one of his weekly check in in a while but he is also much like me. He fights for those he loves endlessly, forgetting himself in the process. Working until he pushes too far. Wanting to be better, do better, be the best and continually climb that perfectionist ladder.

I've heard him give advice about living and taking care of yourself. I've also heard him say he values respect amongst all things. He has many times spoken to his Stays about leaving the haters alone. He almost said he liked people who didnt give a fuck. But stopped himself saying people who don't care instead. He has talked about periods and sex education calling it explicit education. A Stay asked “what will i do without you?” his response they should live, “live life to the fullest.” He even says that no matter who you are, what you want to be, he will be there for you. As a leader he is both beyond honest and careful, also hopeful that  overly enthusiastic Stays don't take things out of context or too far. He trusts his fandom. 

So when i say i listen to kpop. This is it. I watch endless content from many groups that catch my attention. Often I laugh until my stomach hurts and oftentimes I cry. I Read books they recommend, learn a language and culture and customs and history. So yes kpop sounds toxic or intense but to me it's safe in a world that often does not provide that. 

A world where my own mind is my biggest enemy. This is where I can both find myself while I lose myself. Disconnect from my own life and become immersed in another one. So ill keep reading subtitles and translations while i learn korean. But i'll also learn about their history and customs. 

Bowing, instead of the western greeting of hugs or Spanish cheek kisses I grew up with, is probably my favorite. I've never been a touching random strangers person. But in Dominican Republic that's what you do. I also love art now too. That's thanks to RM, the leader of BTS, who is an art collector and Hyunjin of SKZ who paints masterpieces to destress. I eat plenty of Korean food and visit HMart too much. But i've never been a picky eater. I'll try anything twice. 

So yeah this was all because of K-POP but I'm lucky I found them when I did because things have only gotten better since.

#mapofmysoul #me #mental health #rant #truth #jungkook #suga #stray kids #bts #kpop #bang chan #skz #bangtan #stay #army #I.N #Jin #rm #namjoon #jhope #jimin #taehyung #v #Lee know #changbin #jeongin #han #felix #seungmin #svt