#her goth daughters are also v fun

[signedkoko]

Hihihihi! Can I get a parental/platonic parent matchup for hazbin hotel?

Im a cancer, around 14-15 years of age, and have short brown hair. I'm around 4'9-5'6 ft.

Around people I don't know I'm super nice and kind, usually complimenting my my way into a friendship with most people. I like to draw and read horror book, (I.E coraline, the man in the basement, dread end, etc).

I am mostly known around school as a kid who gives most of the time, buying goods for kids who can't at lunch, sitting with lonely kids, etc. I try my best to stay out of fights, and most times I don't initiate them.

At home, however, I can be loud and tired at the same time. I'll be like: "SO GUESS WHAT HAPPENED AT SC- I'm tired ima go nap" and I'm also the peacemaker of the family, being the youngest.

My fashion usually varies from vampire goth to grunge. I mostly wear vampire goth outside of home, but at school I wear grunge cuz if I wear vampire goth I'll get bullied.

Thats all! I'm sorry if I didn't provide enough info! Make sure to take care of yourself ♡

You got…Emily | Carmilla | Vox!

Your best friend is Emily! Ever since the two of you met, you've always gotten along. She really likes your drawings and tries to read what you read, but she finds them a bit scary and will usually depend on you summarizing things for her so she doesn't have to go through any of the gruesome parts. She is probably very scared and very intrigued with Coraline.

Emily agrees that you are one of the sweetest people she's ever met; she never feels judged around you and always gets her thirst for adventure quenched with all the media you show her. Your style is so cool to her, she might even ask if you can help her do some gothy vampire looks.

Expect quite serene days spent having fun without worry. Emily will always be there to defend you, and she probably has a billion questions to ask you at all times.

X

One figure who would take you in is Carmilla Carmine. She already has two daughters whom she adores deeply, and so she has a lot of experience with teens and teaches them all they need to know.

Your fashion probably just matches her looks, and she is more than happy to help you pick out a proper, well-rounded wardrobe that not only suits exactly what you like but also matches her a little bit. Lots of red and grayscale clothing.

Carmilla reads a lot, usually with a glass of red wine, and she makes certain to keep a section of her bookshelf for you, full of books she thinks you might like. She's the type to read all of them in advance, so when you finish, you can talk to her about them to your heart's desire.

Expect a protective but free household; you and her other daughters are held to her highest standard, and anything your heart wishes, she will do her best to achieve. You are always welcome to join the family business, too.

X

Another parental figure you may have is Vox! Vox never planned to have kids or take any in; no, he probably thinks he hates kids! But there's an exception for everything.

He probably sneaks you into the V's tower after finding you alone, and he's already committed to getting you cleaned up and warm because, man, what is this kid doing all alone in hell? He can't just—well, he can't just leave you out there, can he?

The more time you spend together, the more he considers you his daughter. You have your own room that he's always bringing things into. He's the type to just knock until you let him in and then give you some random thing he got you. Single slice of pizza, hot chocolate—hey, look how fast he can solve a Rubics cube. Wanna play with this new drone I'm prototyping? I found the book you wanted!

Oh yeah, the fridge is covered in your drawings. Even if they're digital, he has a little digital screen that has a slideshow of your work, and he does his best to show interest in any hobby you pick up.

If he ever hears you say you won't do something because you'd be bullied, he would probably hand you a taser and money to go indulge in what you like and zap the shit out of anyone who pokes fun at you.

He's not a very good parent in terms of morals, but he won't let anyone hurt you or shame you. He would get Velvette herself to help you find your style and would probably bar Valentino from ever EVER meeting you.

Expect a lot of movie nights together, trying all his new technology first, and getting every ounce of support. You'll never be alone, and you'll always be safe because, unless you ask him not to, he's always checking in on you.

Author’s Note - I actually could not pick, I had so many ideas!! So I went for one friend and two (separate) parental figures! I hope thats okay, I was literally ranting to my friends all night about the indeas I got lmaooo

#koko writez #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #helluva boss matchups #hazbin hotel matchups

[athalme]

hola comrades ♡ i’m gemma ( s/h, 21+ ) bringing u my goth gworlie, kwon mideum! she’s the oldest daughter of the kwon family, a well-known, well-respected witch family who’s run the archives for as long as anyone can remember, so naturally she carries a lot of weight on her shoulders 😪 under the cut is a lot lil more info on her, but as always, please LIKE this post to plot!! thank u lov u mwah!!  ♡

scorpio sun / taurus moon / virgo rising

a bit ab THE ARCHIVES: the kwon family founded it back during the magicka agreements n it’s been in their family’s care ever since! the responsibility is typically passed down to the oldest child of the next generation, etc.

by no means are the kwons filthy rich / cream of the crop spellcasters / A-list celebs of any sort! at most, they’re j a super well-respected family for preserving knowledge n making it a free resource for anyone who needs it

that said, the kwons def take themselves a lil Too seriously,, e.g. they’re big on incantation as a craft n kinda look down on witches who specialise in the other crafts! it’s givin big super fan vibes like imagine sports fans who get personally offended over stuff,, yep

the family will also oust a family member if they, as a witch, end up specialising in any craft other than incantation ( told u it was weirdly elitist )

anw back to mideum! she’s the oldest child four generations into the kwon family, so she’s got her whole life basically planned for her! as a kid, one thing anyone would ever remember of her is that she had really big, explosive emotions!! which is fine and all but to the esteemed kwon family, this was j a lil... ✨ too much ✨ n hella ~ disgraceful ~ considering she’s next in line to inherit the archives!!

they tried their best to discipline her and keep her in check, but she has a really bad temper and it only got worse as she became a teenager!! given that she was v exposed to magic as a kid too, she started learning a few tricks when she was rlly young ( ~8-10? ) and was j a terror!! she’d even cast spells and hexes on others and at some point, her parents were like aight u r actually feral and cannot be trusted in society

so they took her out of sch when she was 14 and she’s been homeschooled since! given that her future was basically planned for her, there was really no need to learn algebra and shit like that, so most of her lessons were to do w the grimoires ( SUPERVISED,, V IMPT ) that were kept in the archives!

having spent 24/7 with j her parents, she was also heavily punished whenever she acted out so naturally, she learnt to be really well-behaved ( e.g. if her parents asked her to jump she’d ask how high ),, it was to the point that she j learnt to bottle up all her emotions and sorta subconsciously grew 2 unds that it was bad to even have them

bc of this, while she grew to be rlly knowledgeable ab grimoires and diff spells, her magic worsened?? incantations require strong emotions to be cast and she grew so out of touch w her own emotions that her magic became rlly inconsistent n unreliable n it’s to the point where she barely tries anymore bc she’s can’t stand bein let down by Herself

also fun fact: she’s a permanent fixture in the archives! alw running around there and was basically a free labour librarian since a teen!! ask her ab any book she knows exactly where it’s kept, what it’s ab, could even recite spells and cite the exact pages ( def gave off know-it-all energy a la stranger things dustin henderson -- when i say she was ANNOYIN )

bc of her being rlly knowledgeable + being the oldest child of the kwon family + whatever else people may remember of her youth ( aka her being annoying w her spellcasting from a v young age ) she’s started to develop a rep that she’s j like a really talented spellcaster but that cannot be further from the truth! that said, she’s embracing this reputation n will say it’s true if anyone asks her

present day, she’s been promoted to bein an archivist! v v knowledgeable abt grimoires and has become a real asset to the archives, much to her parents’ relief! also still a permanent fixture in the archives so rlly nth else has changed ya gworl is truly that npc in a video game here 2 provide u expansive info on wtv grimoires u need for ur quest

if u got this far, tysm 4 reading ♡ below are some PLOTS 2 get us started!!

FAMILIAR 0/1: i imagine the kwons would b part of a legacy, so mideum would bond w a familiar coming from a fam that the kwons have been bonding w for generations! plot could go one of 2 ways: either a) ur muse was keen 2 bond w mideum particularly bc she has a badass rep only 2 find out she can’t magic for shit n uve been scammed or b) bc theyre basically family, maybe yall coudlve been close confidants n ur muse would def have known ab her struggle w magic n how ur prob gna b pullin a lot of the weight in this bond,,,

MINI COVEN 0/3: p sure mideum wasn’t acting alone back in her terror days, so i’d love to see some partners in crime circa middle sch!! maybe yall even formed a loose coven tgt that uve seen ur parents form n tried 2 mimic it!! the 4 of u j reigning terror over all the other kids n feelin like ur on top of the world until 1/4 of u ( cough mideum ) poofs away 2 b homeschooled,, 😔 wyd

PREY 0/2: alternatively someone who was picked on by mideum n co!! she was a big asshole as a kid n prob casted hella spells n hexes on u,, will ur muse retaliate / hold a grudge y/n

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS 0/2: would love 2 see close friends from her past who sorta knew her as the girl w hella Big Emotions!! yall don’t have 2 b super close but one day she disappears from sch n u catch her in the archives like 4y later,, a completely diff person... 🥺 do u even remember her bc she will def rmbr u but may pretend not to idk hfjks

MENTOR 0/1 pref. incantation witch: at some point id rlly lov for mideum 2 get better w her magic and really tap into her emotions!! for this to happen i assume she’d need a mentor of sorts!! pls teach her ur ways o wise one

THE ARCHIVES FREQUENTS ∞: anyone who has ever step foot in the archives, i promise u u prob would’ve bumped into mideum somehow we can def brainstorm n work smth out!!

FREQUENT HAUNTS ∞: mideum is def a permanent fixture @ the archives but she can occasionally be found hanging out @ jynx sweets n the museum of magicka!! would b cool if ur muse is a regular there or we could work smth out!!

MANDARIN GROVE RESIDENTS ∞: mideum lives in mandarin grove w her parents!! would lov a cute lil neighbours plot!! i particularly love the visual of catching glimpses of someone else’s life thru their window that’s like right in the field of vision of ur own,, cue tswift u belong w me

#iv. THY SOUL SHALL FIND ITSELF ALONE » … out of character. #mgc: intro

[scary-movies-on-netflix]

V/H/S/85 (2023)

“V/H/S” is a long-running series that bundles horror shorts into neat little packages.  It’s hard to believe that I have yet to review one for this, your favorite horror movie review blog!

This collection is centered around…the year 1985, which means VHS tapes, big hair, and big… uh…horror.  The shorts are bookended with 1980s clips, such as monster truck shows, commercials, and other scenes, all with that flickering, screen-tearing VHS tape ambiance.  As always, the shorts are “found footage” style, either the direct “I have a camera in your face” or “let’s gather up various cameras that might have caught the action at that time.”

The first story is about a bunch of kids that take a camper van to visit a lake for fun.  Some take a boat onto the river while two other stay on shore to have sex.  When the boaters are enjoying themselves, someone starts shooting at them and they are all murdered.  Fortunately, those that went into the water come back to life!  They return to shore, in various states of distress (one has her jaw shot off, another’s intestines are falling out, etc.) and find their friends also shot to death.  After some freaking out, they realize that they probably caught the killer on camera, as they filmed another truck at their camp site.  They seem intent on revenge…

The second story is in Spanish and starts off with a Mexican newscast.  Unfortunately, this is the date of the 19 September 1985 earthquake that struck Mexico City and killed thousands of people.  The anchorwoman is killed by a piece of falling debris.  The cameraman falls to the ground, but he is rescued by a search team.  Of course, the cameraman has to keep filming, and the group eventually finds themselves deep underground, where the Aztec god Mictlan (short for Mictlantecuhtli), the god of death, has been awakened.  The rescue team dies in various ways.  The last rescuer, a woman, kills the cameraman, then has to take off her clothes, rips out the man’s heart, and bows before the god before the cavern collapses.

The third story is about a woman performing some kind of art show with an electronic, computerized component.  She “travels into” a TRON-like world but accidentally summons some kind of evil computer spirit, which shreds her real body apart.  The audience politely applauds.

The fourth story is about a nice family having a party.  A girl is carrying a video camera, which she then hands to her creepy cousin.  Anyway, we quickly realize that this story is related to the first, as we catch a glimpse of the young peoples’ camper van, and a little boy shoots the girl with water from a water pistol they had.  Anyway, at the end of the party the family celebrates the daughter’s “seven” of something, as we realize that people in the family have a tradition of killing seven people!  The girl shows a videotape of herself killing all the kids from the first short, but the celebration is cut short when the police arrive.  The family go out in a blaze of glory.  The girl and cousin go to a bedroom.  He refuses to shoot the cops, so she kills him.  She then dies in a hail of bullets, but she comes back to life!  Because the campers had her drenched with miraculous water from the lake.  See?  The girl is dragged away by the police.

The fifth story is the longest.  Basically, a goth dude is dreaming the future, and his VHS recorder is…recording his dreams, which he’s sending to the police so they can stop the crime, I guess.  Unfortunately, the police aren’t stopping the crimes, which are being committed by the goth dude’s dad.  (The killer is a “forensic videographer” for the cops, naturlich.)  He’s killing two women who raised complaints against him and their lawyer.  The killer cop kills the main detective, who we were following in the story, and a bunch of other cops, but then his goth son kills him.  The end.

Finally, interspersed with all these shorts was another short, about a group of scientists studying a strange life form that can mimic others.  At the climax, the creature breaks out of its containment room, kills the scientists with its tentacles, and arranges their bodies to mimic the aerobics video that they make it watch. 

Overall, a solid entry.  The shorts lean heavily into gore and body horror, with people blown apart with high-powered rifles, ripped to shreds by a cyber-demon, murdered in grisly fashions, and stabbed with alien tentacles.  Lots of red paint and goo was expended!  I thought that the cop one lingered a bit too long, but the others are direct and to the point.  There’s nothing new or especially innovative about the techniques of “found footage” at this point (except maybe for the techno one, with the woman integrating some computer graphics into her show, but that was also “Lawnmower Man” (1992)), but for the most part the stories were interesting.  I liked how the dead boat kids tied into the murder family, and I was intrigued by how the alien would kill all the scientists at the end.  Basically, everyone dies.

#v/h/s/85 #found footage #horror movie #movie review #2023

[gigginox]

re8 having hot vampire ladies but ugly ugly werewolf men is feminism

#while im not attracted to lady whatever her name is i am obsessed w her character shes v cool and funny to me #her goth daughters are also v fun #lady.txt

[mbg159]

What Your Favorite Yu-Gi-Oh Lead Girl Says About You

Anzu Mazaki/Tea Gardner: Decades of her being called "the friendship slut" have hardened your skin into diamond armor. You’re something of a purist for DM, and have almost definitely read the manga. You probably enjoy shipping her with some stripe of Yugi or Atem. You're very prideful of the fact that she technically has a perfect win record, and mention this fact at every opportunity whenever someone makes fun of her. You have a wary relationship with yaoi shippers.

Asuka Tenjoin/Alexis Rhodes: You probably had some kind of crush on her growing up, and today you claim she deserved better. Like her, you are sick of the bullshit of certain dudes. You have a begrudging soft spot for any character described as “tsundere.” You get really mad when newcomers get suggestions to skip the first two seasons. You were very disappointed at ARC-V, though you got a lot of enjoyment and schadenfreude out of her Deck being meta in Duel Links. 

Aki Izayoi/Akiza Izinski (likes the second half of the series): You are pretty chill, and almost definitely a Faithshipper. You’re very fond of doing all kinds of scenarios of their first meeting. You write at least one thing per day appreciating her development. You really, really like the rollerskates episode. You get really sad during the ending, but you know in your heart of hearts that they definitely kissed offscreen.

Aki Izayoi/Akiza Izinski (dislikes the second half of the series): You got the taste of a girl who was straight-up unhinged, and you've been chasing that high ever since. You find bondage jokes incredibly funny. You have at least one very strong opinion about Crow. Despite your feelings on the second half, you have a soft spot for Sherry. To this day, her battle theme still generates a Pavlovian response of swooning tears in you.

Kotori Mizuki/Tori Meadows: The diamond armor of Anzu fans compares not to the adamantium fortress assembled about you. You are very adamant that a character doesn’t have to be a Duelist to contribute to the plot, though you still admit you prefer her concept over her execution. You really wish the creators weren’t Like That with her. You either ship her with Yuma very wholesomely, or ship her with other characters out of spite. You enjoy “incorrect ZEXAL quotes” blogs.

Yuzu Hiragi/Zuzu Boyle: You are almost certainly a Fruitshipper, or you were one while ARC-V was running. You fondly recall the days when she was half-jokingly labeled the protagonist. Mostly, you just really want your daughter to be happy, though you would also settle for Melodious being playable. You read a whole lot of fanfiction, with your favorites being either pure fluff or retellings of the post-Standard arcs. The ending of the manga caused you to quit the fandom for about a week.

Aoi Zaizen/Skye Zaizen: You resist the urge to type the “Hate” monologue from I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream when asked your feelings on the show’s writers. Much like Aoi, you entered with high hopes and had your soul crushed, and you are now a bitter shell. You have mapped out Aoi’s psychological state to a frightening degree, and found she shares at least half your disorders, especially depression. You console yourself with Zinniashipping and Hatsune Miku jokes.

Romin Kirishima: You actually tried Sevens when it started, found yourself liking it a fair bit, and are now desperately trying to convince your friends to watch it too. You’re very proud of the fact that she’s the first girl to beat a protagonist fairly and mention it a lot, but you’re currently very anxious about her future. Mostly, you just like anything that can be described as “pastel goth.” You like her design and deck, but are very weirded-out by the fact that she’s supposed to be eleven. 

EDIT: Sequels! [DM] [GX]

#yugioh #yu-gi-oh #yugioh gx #yugioh 5ds #yugioh zexal #yugioh arc-v #yugioh vrains #yugioh sevens #anzu mazaki #tea gardner #asuka tenjoin #alexis rhodes #aki izayoi #akiza izinski #kotori mizuki #tori meadows #yuzu hiragi #zuzu boyle #aoi zaizen #skye zaizen #blue angel #blue girl #blue maiden #romin kirishima #peachshipping mention #revolutionshipping mention #vanishshipping mention #faithshipping mention #skyshipping mention #fruitshipping mention

[mcrcki]

Was that [PHOEBE TONKIN]? Oh no no, that was just [CASSANDRA DIMITRESCU], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [RESIDENT EVIL VILLAGE]. They are [ONE HUNDRED+] years old and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

** blanket tw for both resident evil 8 spoilers **

how long has your character been here

cassandra has already been here for about a week, she’s gotten herself used to the city and settled in her own place. she is very concerned about her sisters and mother, but is glad to be somewhere the weather is warmer.

what is your character's job

is maneater a job ? honestly she doesn’t have one, she’s very happy living her life responsibility free. she might get one down the line but for now , not gonna happen.

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

cassandra is pulled after her death at the hands of ethan winters. depending on how you play, she is one of the last to die. when i played through she was the last sister i fought so for now i am gonna go with that canon. the game is pretty flexible that way, so definitely open to discussing !

has any magic affected your character

beyond bringing her back to life, she’s mostly appearing human now. her eyes are still yellow, but the magic has stopped her from having a million bugs flying around her at all times (they’re still there, just invisible now), she also is no longer 6′7 as much as she hates it. she’s more around 5′8 and will 100% be wearing heels every day to make up for it thank you  

extra information 

truly out here with two speeds of muses, strong female dumbasses and murder bitches. already brought one of the former so, please come enjoy my newest murder bitch. i am still on my first play through of the came (currently about to go start the heisenberg portion, so we’re getting along but i don’t know everything yet ) otherwise, just know i played through dimitrescu and went “oh no they’re all hot” so , enjoy !!!

the middle daughter of alicina dimitrescu ( also known as 9 foot tall vampire mom ). she has two sisters, bela and daniela. they were mutants made by alicina after being exposed to a mutant species of insects. they were adopted by her as her “daughters” and lived together in castle dimitrescu as a family after. 

she’s roughly 7 million flies in a trench coat ( yes kasey did this math to figure it out )

cass is stated to be the more sadistic of the three, and enjoys playing with and torturing her victims. she, along with her sisters, would often take these tendencies out on the staff of the castle. cass would partake in that far too often. 

listen there’s a line from bela going like “cassandra made such a mess of this” and she’s right and valid. girl loves to be the most. she is one of the first of the sisters to chase after ethan when he escapes, and if he gives her the opportunity, she absolutely taunts the hell out of him. 

girl is very similar in dc, she’s not quite stable, definitely enjoys flirting and manipulating. if given the chance she’ll do whatever she can to find some new prey. but it’s just not as fun on her own. so once she’s reunited with her sisters, look out dc. 

honestly just all around a messy murder bitch, but she’s hot and uses it to her advantage. 

but with all of that, she is still super loyal to her family, to her sisters and mother, and mother miranda. she will do whatever is asked of her, will fall in line if she has to, but is often the one who is getting in the most trouble from alicina. (her name is shouted p much 24/7 around the castle) 

absolute trouble maker, brings her sisters down with her when she can and always wants to do something fun. she gets bored v easily 

honestly just a crazy goth murder bitch and i love and support her

but this is my formal apology for anything and everything she is about to do. 

connections

uhhhh victims

listen if you’ve been looking for a reason to cause some bodily harm to your male character, this is your girl. she’s got you. she still does need to drink blood, so *insert eyes emoji here*

bestie vibes

would love her to have some other wild ladies to vibe with

pls bring more res 8 characters thanks

she would love to see alicina/any of the other lords

hookups/flings/exes

open to only females, if a man ever gets close to cass’ bed, it’s because she’s eating them. but i’d definitely be down for some casual flirting and a few one night stands or something

#hw: intro #c. interactions #c. intro #c. muse #c. visage #c. memes #c. task #resident evil spoilers tw #resident evil village spoilers tw #spoilers tw #bugs tw #bug tw #death tw #murder tw #murder mention tw #torture mention tw #blood mention tw #listen it's a horror game and she's a villain it's just gonna be tw city

[overwatch-imagines-hub]

Overwatch’s Halloween Costumes (Part 1?)

Anon said: “Hiya ^^ since it's Halloween season (at least, at the time of writing this), I have a halloween-inspired request! What do you think the Overwatch cast- heroes and villains alike- would dress up as for Halloween?”

A/N: Better late than never, am I right?

Also, I was finishing the last half of this piece, had Zarya and Zenyatta left, and then my computer glitched sent me back to my homepage. So yeah, lost half of writing, felt like throwing my computer, decided to just post what I got. It’s been a rough couple days. <D

Hope you enjoy what’s here, sorry for the missing content. Maybe I’ll write the rest when it’s not two am, guess we’ll see.

~~~

Ana

She’s very sarcastic with her costumes

Very Jim from The Office-esque

More often than not it’s an ugly Halloween sweater with a matching ugly Halloween headband, or a shirt that says something along the lines of “This is my Halloween costume”

She has forced Pharah into doing embarrassing mother-daughter costumes a few times as well

She’s more treat-oriented than costumer-oriented

She’s nabbing all the candy

Ashe

She hasn’t done the costume thing since she left Blackwatch

She was practically forced to do Halloween costumes back in the day, and it’s made her hate it

She’s already got that goth bandit look going on anyway

Has been asked if she’s wearing a costume (plus ‘Nice wig/contacts!’) while wearing regular clothing more than once

A bandit underling once asked if the group could do costumes among themselves and her response was threatening to shoot him in his kneecaps

Someone else tried to give her payment in chocolate coins as a trick and they were never seen from again

Baptiste

Loves to do costumes with his patients

He’ll dress up in his hero gear for kiddos and help patients create minimalist costumes for themselves

Probably passes out candy and those funky light-up Jack-o’-lantern headbands to people who can have/wear them

Reads Halloween stories or puts on Halloween movies for kiddos

When he doesn’t do hero gear, he lets people vote on what they want him to wear

He also l o v e s trick-or-treating

Bastion

Naturally, there’s not much costume-wise that a Bastion can do

They’ve tried to put Ganymede in ‘costumes’ (more like flower necklaces or a leaf on the head) but with little success

They’ll wear things they find in nature as a costume sometimes, such as leaves and flowers and sometimes a shiny piece of trash or lost article of clothing

Once some teenagers spray-painted them a costume, it was very exciting

When Torb begrudgingly gives in to caring for Bastion, he and the kids help Bastion get dressed up for the holiday

Brigitte

Loves Halloween

Like immensely

Decorating and planning for it at least a month in advance

This includes plans for costumes

There’s no telling what she’ll be, she’s always something different

You know it’ll be good and hella elaborate, though, because she’s been working on it since last Halloween

D.Va

Similar to Brigitte, she’s always got a new, fun idea every year

Usually animal-themed, or themed after whatever charity she’s partaking in that month

Unlike Brigitte, however, she hates when people celebrate holidays way in advance

How her costumes are always so put-together and cool, no one knows, because she always says she came up with it the night before

Doomfist

Not a costume man himself

Halloween-colored sweaters are the most you can hope for him

He does like giving out candy and going to the annual Talon Halloween party, though

People learned very quickly not to try to force a costume on him if they didn’t want to sleep with one eye open for the rest of their life

Genji Shimada

He really likes costumes, but it’s difficult to find/make one that works well with his current form, so he usually doesn’t wear one

He loves to admire other people’s costumes, and help people create them if they need it

He has dragged Hanzo into doing sibling costumes once or twice before

Hanzo Shimada

It is possible to coerce him into a costume if you’re his s/o or if you’re Genji

Anyone else attempting to get him into one will get an arrow pointed at them, though

Junkrat

Doesn’t really do the whole costume thing

In normal sense anyway

Instead he just kinda

Puts on a funky shirt, or some outfit he stole from someone/somewhere and calls it a costume

He’s far too busy stealing candy from people who won’t give him any when he goes trick-or-treating anyway

Lucio

Goes all out for his costumes

There’s always a new idea, and oftentimes it corresponds with D.Va’s costume, especially if they’re both at the same charity

The amount of times he’s been able to design a different type of frog/toad/amphibian costume is wild

After the holidays, he has to take some much-needed hair care time, because his hair style, color, etc changes at least twelve times between October and February

McCree

He’s already wearing a costume, thank you very much

Vintage cowboy, baby

If anyone calls him vintage, though, he will demand a competition to see who is more spry

Yeah, he doesn’t do the costume thing much, just spruces up his look a bit to fit the part of a regular, old-fashioned cowboy

A different hat, serape in a different pattern, loses all the high-techy bits of his gear for the day (except for his arm, of course), etc

Despite not doing much costuming herself, Jesse gets so much shit for ‘cheating’ Halloween

She’s usually the one he’s fighting for spryness

She usually wins

Mei

She’s far too busy for costumes, believe it or not

She’s more of the decorating type

However, she does want Snowball to enjoy themselves, and they love Halloween, so she helps them dress up

It’s usually nothing simple

Mercy

She adopted Ana’s sarcastic costuming style at some point

Probably absorbed through time and admiration

Tied with loss of innocence and gain of seriousness that growing up and working as an Overwatch medic does to a person

Plus, she works all the time, and definitely works Halloween, so a simple ‘costume’ with a little dry humor works much better in her field than a whole elaborate outfit

Moira

Hah, a costume?

That’s funny

The most you get is candy bowls around the office (only of Moira’s favorite treats) and maybe some Halloween colors in her attire

So

Nothing much different than the usual

Orisa

Matching costumes with Efi, whatever costume that may be

A fairy and a unicorn

A pair of knights

Ana and Pharah in their uniforms, once, which made Ana laugh out loud and Pharah flustered

Pharah

Speaking of Pharah

Similar to Mercy, she works a lot and takes her work very seriously

She also takes Halloween not very seriously

Therefore, it’s rare she’s not working during the holiday, and she definitely wouldn’t be wearing a costume

Unless Ana drags her into one

At most, a Halloween-themed sweater might appear at some point in the day if the compound is chilly

Reaper

His work clothes are his costume

#overwatch #overwatch x reader #overwatch headcanons #overwatch imagines #ana amari #overwatch ashe #overwatch baptiste #overwatch bastion #overwatch brigitte #d.va #doomfist #genji shimada #hanzo shimada #junkrat #overwatch lucio #jesse mccree #overwatch mei #overwatch mercy #overwatch moira #orisa #pharah #overwatch reaper #overwatch reinhardt #roadhog #overwatch sigma #soldier 76 #sombra #symmetra #torbjorn #overwatch tracer

[pastelbatfandoms]

ABCs of your OCs

A list of oc questions in alphabetical categories - i made each category based on the first word I could think of in alphabetical order, so enjoy!

Decided to try and answer these using Gifs and Images of My characters (aka who or what reminds me of My character)

.Doing this for My OC Michelle Riley in My Riverdale Fic. 

Michelle is “played by” Ksenia Solo (Teen) &  Kaya Scodelario (Young Adult)

A: Aptitude 1. what are your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young? Writing,solving Mysteries,has always had an interest in the occult and anything different and unusual.

2. what activities have they participated in? Michelle is a bit of a Loner but she has done Cheer and writes Poetry in her spare time as well as mysteries. She also was a camp counselor & Lifeguard with Betty and Cheryl over the summer. 

3. what abilities do they have?  She’s human but Michelle knows a bit of Karate and was taught how to fight by FP.

4. what things are they bad at? Being Honest,Indecisive,

5. what is their most impressive talent? Writing and Dancing

B: Basics 1. what is their hair color?  Dark brown. Dies Black or wears Blond wigs. 

2. what is their eye color? Brown but wears Light green or blue contacts

3. how tall are they? A little shorter than Jughead

4. how old are they? 15 (Story start) 19 (Story end) October 7 2000

5. how much do they weigh?

C: Comfort 1. how do they sit in a chair? Usually leaning forward.

2. in what position do they sleep?

3. what is their ideal comfort day? Reading or watching TV,eating,doing something creative,learning new things (especially about the occult or conspiracy theories),writing poetry,mainly being by herself on her down time.Although she’s an ambivert so she does like hanging out with her BF or Friends after her alone time. 

4. what is their major comfort food? um Anything lol She’s literally a female Jughead in more ways than one. Burgers and fries,Milkshakes,Pancakes,Chips and salsa...

5. who is the best at comforting them when down? Betty or Mom. Most of the time Jughead. (unless it’s about him)

D: Decoration 1. how would they decorate a house if they had one under their name? Minimalistic with plants,charming and attractive yet simple and comfortable. Small neighborhood.

2. how would they decorate their child’s room? Michelle doesn’t want kids

3. how do they decorate their own room? Shabby Chic,Girly mixed with rustic. With of course darker undertones. 

4. what type of clothes and accessories do they wear? Goth,Grunge,Edgy,had a preppy phase. (Casual Artsy in Middle school) 

5. do they like makeup/nail/beauty trends? Yes.

E: External Personality 1. does the way they do things portray their internal personality?  Sometimes. She’s not as tough as she portrays. 

2. do they do things that conform to the norm? Sometimes. If on her own.

3. do they follow trends or do their own thing? No

4. are they up-to-date on the internet fads? Only E-Girl and Mod Goth.

5. do they portray their personality intentionally or let people figure it out on their own? Is shy at first.

F: Fun 1. what do they do for fun? Shopping,Dancing,hanging out at Pop Tates Malt Shop,Drive in movies,Art,watching Horror movies,writing poetry,Solving Mysteries,going out to a club or the biker bar The White Wyrm. 

2. what is their ideal party? See Above. Dancing,Strobe lights,Band,Underage Drinking/Sex. Unless she’s 18 or 19 then. Decorating for parties and liked having Clue inspired Sleepovers in middle school.

3. who would they have the most fun with? Her girls. B,V & C.

4. can they have fun while conforming to rules? When alone yes.

5. do they go out a lot? Yes.

G: Gorgeous 1. what is their most attractive external feature? Her eyes and smile.

2. what is the most attractive part of their personality? 

3. what benefits come with being their friend?

4. what parts of them do they like and dislike?

5. what parts of others do they envy?  IDK if I’m going to finish this.

H: Heat 1. do they rather a hot or cold room?

2. do they prefer summer or winter? Spring and Fall

3. do they like the snow? Not really.

4. do they have a favorite summer activity? Thrift Shopping and Sleuthing

5. do they have a favorite winter activity? Reading inside or Sleuthing.

I: In-the-closet 

1. what is their sexuality? Pan Sexual 

2. have they ever questioned their sexuality? yes

3. have they ever questioned their gender? No

4. would/was their family be okay with them being LGBT? Yes they are very open minded.

5. how long would/did it take for them to come out? High School

J: Joy 1. what makes them happy? Art,writing,shopping,mysteries,love,music.

2. who makes them happy? Her Family (Blood and none)

3. are there any songs that bring them joy? Wow I have a whole playlist...

4. are they happy often? More or less

5. what brings them the most joy in the world?

K: Kill 1. have they ever thought about suicide? I don’t write that. They may have dark thoughts but never act on them,this is not 13 reasons why.

2. have they ever thought about homicide? No

3. if they could kill anyone without punishment, would they? who? No

4. who would miss them if they died? Um all her Friends and Family

5. who would be happy they died, anyone? Penny Peabody lbr

L: Lemons 1. what is their favorite fruit? 2. what is their least favorite fruit?

3. are there any foods they hate?

4. do they have any food intolerances?

5. what is their favorite food? Already said. She also really likes Chicken with chips and salsa.

M: Maternal 

1. would they want a daughter or a son? 

2. how many children do they want? 

3. would they be a good parent? 

4. what would they name a son? 

what would they name a daughter? 

5. would they adopt? Possibly

N: Never Have I Ever

1. what would they never do? Kill Innocents.

2. what have they never done that they want to do? 

3. is there anything they absolutely can’t believe people do? People do alot of shitty things. Killing Kids and animals would be one of them.

4. what is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done? 

5. have they done anything they thought they’d never do? Um get drunk and sleep with her boyfriends Dad??...Or cheat on Jug with Veronica. SPOILERS! But I probably won’t finish this story lbh.

O: Optimism 1. are they optimistic or pessimistic? Both

2. are they openly optimistic?

3. are they good at giving advice? Yes

4. is there anyone in their life that throws optimism on them? Throws lol I suppose her Mom or Betty. 

5. were they always optimistic? 

>>>P: Personality 1. what is their best personality trait?

2. what is their worst personality trait?

3. what of their personality do others love?

4. what of their personality do others envy?

5. do they hate anything about their personality/about other’s personalities?

<<<Will do this later

Q: Questions 1. do they ask for help? Sometimes

2. do they ask questions in class? She did yes,when she was trying to be a straight A student.

3. do they answer questions that make them a little uncomfortable? Yes

4. do they ask weird questions? Yes

5. are they curious? Yes

R: Rules 1. do they follow rules? Sometimes.

2. would they be a strict or laid-back parent? A good balance.

3. have they ever been consequences for breaking a rule? 

4. have they broken any rules they now regret breaking?

5. do they find any rules they/others follow absolutely ridiculous? Nope

S: Streets 1. are they street-smart? Yes

2. would they give money to someone on the streets? Probably

3. have they ever gotten in a fight on the streets? Yes

4. has anything happened to them on the streets? Other then Fights,no.

5. are they cautious when out? Now yes,but she can take care of herself.

T: Truth 1. are they honest? More so now yes.

2. can they tell if someone is lying? Yes

3. is it obvious when they’re lying? Yes

4. have they lied about anything they regret lying about? Sleeping with FP

5. have they ever been talked about behind their back? I’m sure.

U: Underdog 1. have they been bullied? A couple times but they stopped once she stood her ground,same with standing up for others (like Jughead)

2. have they bullied anyone? No

3. have they been physically attacked? Yes

4. have they ever been doubted? Yes.

5. have they surprised people with being good at something? Yes,alot of Guys (and girls) underestimate her.

V: Vomit 1. do they vomit often? 2. do they get lots of stomach aches? 3. are they good at comforting someone ill? 4. what do they like as far as comfort goes? 5. do they burp, cough, or hiccup most when nauseous? when vomiting?

W: Water 1. do they drink enough water? 2. have they learned to swim? 3. do they like to swim? 4. can they dive? 5. can they swim without holding their nose?

X: Xylophone 1. what is their favorite genre of music? Oldies,Indie & Goth Rock

2. do they have a favorite song? Prince-Die 4 U

3. do they have a favorite band/artist/singer? The Cure,Prince & The Neighborhood.

4. can they sing well? Sure

5. can they rap? No

Y: You 1. how old were you when you created them? It was in 2017. 

2. what inspired you to create them? Watching Riverdale for the first time

3. were they different when they were first created? No

4. do you enjoy writing them more than other characters? No

5. what’s your favorite thing about them? Her style and sarcasm. 

Z: Zebra 1. what’s their favorite animal? Cats and Dogs

2. do they like animals? Yes

3. cats or dogs? Both

4. what’s their dream pet? Panther or Dragon

5. do they have any pets at the moment? Shares a Sheepdog/Mutt with The Serpents,named Hot Dog.

#riverdale fanfiction #mughead #My OC #gif survey #oc survey

[ignorethisrandom]

Life beyond Henry VIII

Christina of Denmark, most famous for sassily rebuffing Henry VIII’s proposal of marriage by saying she’d only marry him if she had TWO heads, lived as interesting a life as any of the Tudors.

Her father Christian II of Denmark was so hated in that country that history now calls him “Christian the Tyrant”. He was overthrown by his own uncle and exiled to the Netherlands, then ruled by his brother-in-law, the Holy Roman Emperor Charles V.  

Christina grew up an exiled princess without a kingdom, the daughter of a black mark on European royalty. 

She married young and was widowed soon after.

Her cousin was Philip II, who later married Mary Tudor...then Elisabeth de Valois (the French princess)...then his niece Anna of Austria...

Christina actually met Mary Tudor, who was jealous of Christina’s closeness to Philip, a closeness her own marriage to the Spanish prince and future king was lacking.

After refusing to marry Henry VIII, Christina married the Duke of Lorraine and had several children with him, including Charles III. Her husband died after four years of marriage, leaving Christina to fight with the other nobles over the regency for young Charles. Christina won the regency...and then lost it. But she wasn’t going to give up without a fight, not even when France invaded the duchy of Lorraine and demanded that Christina hand young Charles over to the French king, Henri II, to raise in France. 

She went to King Henri in person to beg him not to separate her from her son, but he wouldn’t relent and took her son anyway. Charles would later marry Henri’s daughter Claude in one of the few happy and loving marriages in the Valois family history. Charles and Claude later named one of their daughters after Christina.

Also, Henry VIII wasn’t the only person Christina turned down. She also turned down one of Mary Queen of Scot’s uncles, a member of the Guise clan. She blamed the Guise for Henri’s invasion of Lorraine. 

Funnily enough, Charles wasn’t the only member of his family to marry into the Valois family. Charles’s cousin Louise married Henri de Valois, known in history as King Henri III...aka, the possibly gay French king...(who history buffs on Tumblr should embrace as their bisexual goth problematic fave, just saying). 

According to writer Brantome, Christina also met Mary Queen of Scots after the young queen was widowed by her beloved, the young King Francis II. Mary’s uncle warned her ahead of time about Christina’s theatrical antics and her need to be the center of attention, behavior the Guise party found both annoying and amusing. I wonder what Christina would have thought of the Scottish queen, daughter of ANOTHER woman who turned down Henry VIII with a sick burn. 

Christina may not have attended her son Charles’ wedding to the Princess Claude, but she did attend the coronation of the new king of France, ten-year-old Charles IX...who could barely keep his large crown still on his little head. Brantome wrote that Christina showed up in her finest velvet gown with a carriage drawn by Turkish horses (her favorite type of horses). When she arrived in this pomp and splendor, even Catherine de Medici remarked: “There’s a proud woman!” 

Christina tried to offer every piece of advice to her son Charles while he was Duke of Lorraine, while her daughter-in-law Claude listened to her mother’s every advice on what to do with Lorraine. The poor couple probably never caught a break from two very nosy and very opinionated mothers and mothers-in-law. 

It’s a pity that Reign never mentioned Lorraine, or Christina, her son, and tons of other colorful personalities from France during the 1550s and 1560s. I feel like the writers would have had so much fun featuring a sassy smack down between Catherine de Medici and Christina of Denmark. 

Reign really failed to show how important the Guise family was to Mary. There’s a whole goldmine of storylines from history that the show sadly skipped over.

#Reign #Reign cw #cw reign #Christina of Denmark #Christina of Lorraine #Christina de Lorraine #Duke of Guise #Mary Stuart #Mary Queen of Scots #Catherine de Medici #Claude de Valois #Claude Valois #Charles IX #Henri III #Henry III #Louise de Lorraine #Charles III #Charles III de Lorraine #Henry VIII #Marie de Guise #Duke of Lorraine #Duchy of Lorraine #Christian II #Charles V #Philip II #Mary Tudor #Mary I

[cerealmonster15]

ddadds kids....

i like thinking about them as one big extended cul-de-sac family... [headcanons and stuff!]

imagine all the families spending the holidays together! i’m sure some celebrate things that the rest dont but theyd probs have one big generic get together during The Holiday Season

all of the kids are crammed together on one big “kid’s table” even tho like half of them are teenagers and there are more offspring than parents

someone always ends up starting a food fight,, usually ernest and lucien, or the twins [either pair. both pairs?? christie and christian vs hazel and briar??]

this was referenced in game once so amanda probs ends up babysitting a lot when she’s home from college for breaks+ during that short time shes still around before she leaves! she’d be  a cool fun babysitter, but tough enough to keep some of the more rambunctious kids in check ;p

[ernest voice] dad i dont NEED a babysitter!!! [hugo voice] son i want to know that i can be away for the weekend and come home to a house that isn’t on fire

ernest is probs really snarky to amanda when she babysits like “youre not the boss of me” and going out of his way to cause trouble, but amanda is Cool and probs gives him a run for his money with snark and idk shenanigans ensue and he probs secretly admires her and thinks she’s awesome but would rather die than let anyone ever find out

lucien looks like he might be fairly close to amanda’s age? they probs dont have all that much in common, but damien’s date revealed that lucien listens to mcr, and amanda made her dad listen to black parade, so I bet they could bond over some music tastes here and there

LET LUCIEN GIVE AMANDA A COOL GOTH MAKEOVER

amanda: pleeeeeaaaaassseeeeeee ;D??? lucien: no way. the goth lifestyle isnt for posers i think with enough pestering she’d get him to cave. he’d take great time and care while painting her nails to make sure he does it Right

amanda probs comments on how careful and skilled he does it like “wow you really take this stuff seriously” “uh obviously??”

once he finishes, amanda takes a pic, and then all the other neighbors see her and are bothering lucien to make them look cool too. he pretends to hate it but actually has a lot of fun and is secretly really happy that they think he’s good at what he does

amanda convinces lucien to do like, cool goth makeup videos and put them on youtube/instagram. she helps him with filming and doing photography of final looks and together they get a lot of followers. sometimes she’ll guest star in his videos if he needs a face model other than his own

amanda’s kinda freaked out by christie and christian at first but over time gets used to and sees past their “creepy twin shtick” and, much like her dad [in the joseph brownie date] learns to use it to mess with them and possibly other people

at first chris probably doesnt talk to amanda a lot and keeps to himself when she’s over, but maybe over time she’d adapt to him and learn a few things hes interested in and express gentle interest in those things to kind of help him open up to her more

chris gets quietly attached to her like shes an older sister

everyone in the cul de sac does. they love amanda

AND EACH OTHER

i want daisy to be involved with the carmensita and amanda girl band thing mentioned briefly during one of mat’s dates. that’d be adorable

you know what else would be adorable? allllll the cul de sac kids coming to briar and hazel’s softball games to support them. 

the kids going to each others’ anything to support them!! when theyre in clubs and activities that put on shows or performances or other sports games, as many of the neighbors that can make it are there

when they get older, they try to be more and more obnoxious to embarrass their neighbors in front of everyone, like making huge support signs and banners with glitter with a stupid yet supportive pun that one of their dads helped come up with, or printing their neighbor’s face on a tshirt or a giant cutout on a popsicle stick, shouting as loud as possible 

they def went to amanda’s actual graduation and PROBABLY ALL CRIED

a lot of this has amanda centric bc i Love Her, but also,,

maybe hugo and craig start going to wrestling matches together [+dadsona] so ernest sees a lot of the cahn kids. if amanda’s in town, she’s with them and in charge. if not, ernest is technically in charge, but secretly [not so secretly probably] the dads are counting on briar and hazel [briar, mostly] to keep things from falling to disaster for the few hours theyre out

they all like to take turns riding on the Giant Dog that ernest got in damien’s route [duchess something i think?] [a good component that should be canon in all universes]

“lets put river on him” “no she’ll fall off” “wheres the duct tape” “n o”

if enough disaster happens leaving these kids alone together, they probably get dropped off at another dad’s house to be looked after for a while. joseph volunteers to look after them but since he and mary are already looking after 4 and KEEP LOSING CRISH, they tend to try and ask literally anyone else

[not that theyre bad parents lmao but it’d be easier for all the other parents that just have One Kid]

i bet christian and christie love robert’s wild spooky stories. he probably makes up so much bullshit to fuck with any kid that’s listening

they’d carpool if they could fit enough kids in one car. it’s probably a 2-3 car carpool depending on who’s driving what size car and who needs to go where at what time

there are probably so many inside jokes[CUL DE SAC MEMES......] that are born at every cul de sac gathering. 

when amanda’s home from college, all the kids wanna be the first to tell her all about the SHENANIGANS she’s missed out on

river and crish are bffs once theyre old enough for human interaction. they Have To Be.

pranking each other in the school hallways plz, or just all around chaos. god help the teachers that somehow end up with 2+ of the cul de sac kids in the same class

ernest definitely sends his dog to poop on damien’s lawn outside lucien’s bedroom window / probably does the flaming bag of dog poop ding dong ditch when he knows lucien’s home alone and will be the one to answer the door

christie and chris like when briar and hazel pretend to be each other, so they get their hands on a pair of scissors and chris gives christie a terrible haircut. possibly briar and hazel try and help with the scheme and things just get Worse and joseph has to take his daughter to a Professional [or maybe one of the dads is really good with hair/has had their child do the same thing and is good with fixing a bad haircut ;p]

carmensita goes through a goth phase after she goes over to lucien’s to be babysat one day. mat does not know how to Deal bc this isnt the type of music hes used to playing but he loves and supports his daughter regardless and likes to hear her singing all kinds of music to broaden her horizons and strengthen her talent

G R O U P  T E X T between all the kids old enough to have phones

there are lots of memes. lots. of memes.

they take candid shitty photos of each other all the time and send them in the chat, and particularly amusing ones end up reused as reaction photos

lucien: [sends photo of ernest having just spilled cereal on himself with duchess in the background making off with a piece of pizza] ernest: fuck u carmensita: mood daisy: why are you having pizza and cereal for breakfast? ernest: dont tell me how to live my life amanda: lol tag urself i’m duchess

this is just something i like to do w/ my friends but they’d probs also stealthily take pictures  of each other when theyre out and about and send them to each other in secret like amanda’s out with her dad at the grocery store and spots lucien and damien in the dairy isle and is like FUCK,, she hides behind a stand of donuts or w/e and takes a pic of them and sends it to lucien w/ no context or like “lol hey” 

it becomes a war of sending pics of each other to each other/the group without getting caught. lucien and ernest probably act like they think it’s stupid but get so competitive about it

they all keep score and it probably also would extend to taking stealthy pics of cul de sac dads too Just Because

the dads find out about the competition somehow and like,,, secretly are so into who’s winning. especially brian and dadsona. sometimes they’ll try and serve as a distraction for their child to get a sneaky pic so they can win, but usually the kids prefer the solo missions

val comes and visits sometimes with cool stories. sometimes she brings her girlfriend, and amanda especially looks up to them like two cool older sisters [i dont remember if it was jacket pins or photography that val said her gf is into, but whatever it is i’m sure amanda would geek out about it with her]

christie and christian eventually grow out of their “creepy twin” thing but still have a more unique brand of humor/personality. the cul de sac kids are used to them by then, and will THROW DOWN with anyone that bullies them/ calls them freaks or anything like that, or anyone that picks on chis [and eventually crish] by association or for any other reason

THESE KIDS MAY ARGUE AND FIGHT AND STUFF SOMETIMES BUT THEY’LL STICK UP FOR EACH OTHER IF ANYONE OUTSIDE THE CUL DE SAC TRIES TO START SOMETHING W/ ONE OF THEIR OWN

i could go on forever making up headcanons or scenarios for these kids bc i love them and constantly crave more content about them but imma stop here bc it’s been over an hour and this is Long but anyway plz talk to me about these kids + the cul de sac as a whole. share ur headcanons,,,,, i l o v e the m ,,

#ddadds #headcanons #long post #VERY LONG MY B #dream daddy #I GOT REALLY INTO IT #but now i gotta clean my room a bit hurgk blegh

[blooming-blooming]

Saw I - VII: A Comprehensive View

This is something I don’t normally do, but have been meaning to do for a while when I consume a large series of media in a short period time. I figured this was the perfect opportunity to start.

As of recently, I’ve realized that I am a fan of horror. Like, a really, really big fan of horror. I’ve always flirted with my fascination of it (The Green Ribbon had more of an impact on me in the walls of my elementary school library than it probably should have on an 8 year old, in hindsight), but I never really knew where to go about getting into the genre until I started dating my girlfriend, who has horror as a special interest.

Growing up in the 2000’s with an older sister that was going through her middle school goth phase when the first film in the franchise came out, it was hard not to know about Saw. Such an iconic franchise I knew very little about past the gore (and, let’s be real -- I’m a huge fan of gore); so me, my girlfriend, and a friend of ours decided to spend my last weekend of Summer marathonning all 7 movies. Both of them had seen the first two films and we’d all read plot summaries, but besides that, it was a blind watch through. Here’s my brief stance on each one.

Altogether, I was surprised at just how much I enjoyed this experience. I was expecting to mostly suffer, and maybe find some small nuggets of enjoyment along the way to keep me going, but after every movie (except III), I found myself wanting to watch the next one right away. These movies are by no means good movies, for the most part, but they’ve become a guilty pleasure for me. Among all the egregious, torture porn-y gore and a plot that beyond transcends making even remote sense, I found myself having a lot of fun. And, at the end of the day, that’s the purpose of a cash cow franchise like this was: to entertain you. In that regard, the Saw franchise succeeded.

Saw (2004)

The first in the franchise, and the most iconic. We’ve all heard of the reverse bear trap and the part where Gordon cuts his foot off.

I didn’t know what to expect when I dove into this movie, and I was very pleasantly surprised. The atmospheric building is top notch, and the twist at the end has much more impact than I expected it to. I enjoyed the tension and distrust between Adam and Gordon; I felt it was just as realistic of an approach for them to never trust each other as it would have been had they slowly learned to trust each other.

What’s really important in this one, though, which every sequel lacks, is Kramer’s portrayal. He’s not painted as philosophical or in the light, he’s painted as downright sadistic and cruel. The fact that he isn’t a murderer in the absolute broadest sense of the term is only ever mentioned by Gordan, and not constantly used as a justification for him. His cancer is only ever brought up to give him a connection to Gordon and Zepp; not something to make the viewers empathize.

This especially makes the final scene, the one where he stands up, have so much more impact: “The key was in the bathtub,” and Adam’s subsequent reaction is the ultimate punch in the stomach to the viewer because it’s so evil. The entire time Adam thought he had a chance, that there was a spot of hope for him, only to have it viciously jerked away as he realizes he was damned from the beginning. Because this is a franchise with a narrative built entirely on retconning, this impact is diminished severely in later installments, but as a standalone film, it’s top notch.

Also, apparently the ship name for Gordon and Adam is “Chainshipping”. I have no idea how that, of all ship names, wasn’t taken by the YuGiOh fandom at least a decade ago, but I’m mildly impressed that a ship that obscure has a name at all.

Overall score: 8/10

Saw II (2005)

The second installment in the franchise. It’s worth noting that the original screenplay wasn’t intended to be a Saw film, but rather an original story that got adapted to work into the Saw universe.

The story follows eight people who have all been locked in a house. The doors will open and they’ll be free in three hours, but there’s just one problem: there’s a neurotoxin in their systems that will kill them in two. They need to work together to find out what their connection to one another is while overcoming challenges to gain antidotes to the neurotoxin before they die. Meanwhile, a police team lead by detective Eric Matthews has located and is interrogating Kramer on the location of Matthews’ son, Daniel, one of the eight people in the house.

Right off the bat, the drop of quality from the first movie is extremely apparent. Very few members of the cast are properly developed, and many die before they even get to their trap. Most notably, one of the characters, Obi, is an arsonist who is very heavily implied to be an accomplice of Kramer’s. This aspect is explored for all of about two minutes before he gets burned alive in an incinerator. It’s hard to get invested because there are too many characters who have nothing going for them.

Despite that, there are good things about the film. The needle pit scene is well done in just how tense and unfair it is. Likewise, the twist at the end that the house game happened before the police found Kramer is really creative and interesting. Sadly, these positives don’t make the movie worth watching overall, though.

Overall score: 4/10

Saw III (2006)

I honestly don’t know what to say. This was the worst movie I have ever watched in my entire life. Sadism and cruelty in a story should have a narrative purpose and should ultimately be shown to be bad, but it’s not here. You are honest to god supposed to think John Kramer, the serial killer who took one of his victims, a mentally ill recovering drug addict, and brainwashed her to carry out his torture with him, is in the moral right when said victim finally lashes out. You’re supposed to think it’s cool when Amanda, who has been deliberately manipulated and abused by this man, gets told she couldn’t meet up to his standards. You’re supposed to think she deserved her death for being “irrational” when she calls Kramer out on his bullshit, hypocritical, half-assed “philosophy”. Fuck that. Fuck that so hard with a stake wrapped in barbed wire.

Also, the dad was an unsympathetic piece of shit and all of the traps weren’t violent in a way that was thematically appropriate (minus the crucifix one, but that one was disturbing for a million other reasons, anywways, so who the fuck cares if it was good conceptually), they were just gross. I have never wanted to unwatch a movie as badly as I wanted to unwatch this one immediately after finishing it in my entire life.

HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.

Overall score: -∞/10

Saw IV (2007)

Lord knows why I decided to continue watching these movies after the misanthropic, nihilistic, faux-philosophical sack of trash that was III, but I’m surprisingly glad I did. I feel like I could just say, “A pedophile dies one of the single most brutal deaths known to man, and a man who abuses his wife and daughter has a terrible death, too,” but that doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of what makes this movie amazing.

This is the first film where Kramer is dead (or so we’re lead to believe), however, Amanda is dead, too. So the franchise needs a new accomplice retconned in to take over after this film when Kramer and Amanda are dead For Real. Enter detective Hoffman, who had a grand total of one line of dialogue in III, to take that spot.

The plot and pacing of this film is stupid. And when I say stupid, I mean stupid. Everything is so ridiculously convoluted with multiple plot lines and involvement in the FBI that I honest to god could not describe to someone what happens. And, somewhere along the way, the film goes full circle. It becomes so ridiculous, so hard to follow, that it becomes brilliant. It’s so convoluted that you can’t help but laugh at the absolute absurdity of it all. This movie is a shitshow, but it’s an entertaining shitshow.

Overall score: 3/10

Saw V (2008)

The first film where Kramer and Amanda are Dead For Real, following the fallout from the incidents of Saws III + IV. FBI Agent Peter Strahm is onto Hoffman’s identity, and is deadset on bringing him to justice. Meanwhile, five people are trapped in a sewer and need to learn what connects all of them, and also go through some traps to attract viewers to theaters because nobody would see this otherwise.

This film is ultimately disappointing because it could have been good. All five contestants in the sewer game are really interesting, and it takes the concept of II and fixes up the ideas from it. Sadly, this cast and their story gets even less development than those in Saw II. I’m not joking when I say that they’re only there for the sake of a murder game to attract viewers; 90% of the film is focused on a boring game of cat and mouse between Strahm and Hoffman. It’s really a shame, since I absolutely love the twist at the end that they were supposed to work together for all of the traps and none of them had any idea until it was too late. It’s a concept I might make something of my own with, since I’d really love to see it done well and properly developed.

Overall score: 2/10

Saw VI (2009)

This movie is, quite frankly, surreal. I’m not sure if all of the previous sequels simply wore down my standards for what is or isn’t a high quality movie, but this film was legitimately fantastic.

A very common criticism for this movie is that it is far too political for a franchise that is known for just being senseless gore -- and it’s true, especially because of how hypocritical it is that a franchise based entirely around killing/punishing people for arbitrary reasons is making social commentary on the insurance industry deciding who deserves to live based on arbitrary reasons. Despite that, though, there’s something about it in this film that works so well.

The storytelling in this movie is the closest any of the sequels get to matching the quality of the first film. Following protagonist William Easton, the CEO of an insurance company that is notorious for rejecting potential clients coverage when needed or prematurely terminating contracts, he is lead through several traps where he is forced to put value on the lives of his employees. Meanwhile, Hoffman is dealing with the consequences of trying and failing to frame the now-deceased Strahm for his crimes.

I really don’t know what to say about this film other than it’s bizarrely well done. The Merry Go Round trap is my favorite trap in the franchise (after my Number 1 Hall of Fame favorite, The Bed Trap from IV, anyways); the direction of the arguing employees begging for life and Easton ultimately leaving his second choice up to chance just so he can get it over with is handled chillingly well. A lot of people find the twist diminishing to Easton’s storyline, but I disagree. The fact that the game was never Easton’s and was always the wife and son of one of the people his company was responsible for the death for reminds me a lot of the first film in a good way. It has the same cruelty to it that is satisfying because it works within the narrative; just because Easton realized the errors of his ways in an extreme situation does not mean the people he has hurt in his practices have to forgive him. This is pointed out as such in both Tara and Brent’s dialogue as they make the choice in the end to kill him. It’s just as appropriate of a response as if they let him live.

This is also the first (and only) movie where I even find myself interested in the extended “plot” throughout all seven movies; Hoffman has completely screwed himself over, and it’s surprisingly suspenseful to watch him try and crawl himself out of his hole.

Overall score: 7/10

Saw VII (2010)

Overall score: Torture porn/10

#saw #write tag #Niki Gets Meta #The wild blue wind dancing in the sky! Queue Princess!!

[necrofox]

Part #1 Esper and Sebastian

               Esper had been working hard on the farm that year, things seemed to be going pretty well. The difficult years were behind her and most of what she had to do each day was feed and milk the animals and collect the eggs. Having found that she had a talent in mining early on in her time in Pelican town, she had all the necessary metals to make sure her  crops were more or less automated in their care. The hot summer sun bore down on Crescent farm as she made her way to the barn, lugging the equipment she would need for her work.

"Good morning Ladies!" Esper crooned in a sing song voice as she entered the barn, the smell of hay and animal waste welcoming her like an old friend. Just a few years ago, she would have been repulsed by the aroma, but now it was comforting. She sang as she worked, she always did. Only on the farm though, she was much too self conscious to sing in front of anyone but the "Ladies" as she referred to her livestock. The Ladies didn't judge her, or make fun of her behind her back, they loved her and needed her. She trusted very few people like she did her animals, people were often rude or just didn't understand her.

               Mostly they talked about her weight, Esper was a larger girl. Five foot five inches and two hundred and sixty pounds to be exact, not that she'd tell anyone who asked, and she had been asked. She worked hard every day on the farm, she went on long forays into the mines, she walked everywhere she went, but she just couldn't seem to lose any weight. she had definitely toned up and become much stronger since moving to Pelican town, which was more than she had hoped for considering she hadn't been planning on resurrecting her grandfathers farm at all. She had planned on using it as a free place to live while she saved up to buy her own condo in Zuzu city.    

               Well things happen, and she let curiosity get the better of her. Could she do it,  she asked her self. Could she possibly take this ramshackle old farm and turn it into something living and green? well it turned out that she could but  boy were there times when she wanted to give up. Esper  hated it in Pelican town at first.

               Everyone in Pelican town was so...perfect. At first glance anyway. She was intimidated, such a small place, everyone knows everyone. When Lewis had tasked her with introducing her self to everyone she nearly had a panic attack. "I'm an outsider" She thought, "They'll never accept me, let alone like me." In some cases she was right, in others she was completely wrong. She had actually made some pretty good friends in town. There was pretty Abigail, the perky, geeky, goth-type girl  who lived in the apartment attached to the general store. They had pretty much become best friends, they had so much in common. They both had a love for the occult, the mines, dark and spooky things, dying their hair and so on.

               There was Sam, The bubbly skateboard guy, sometimes a little too hyper for Esper's reserved attitude, but he was a sweet person, Always inviting her out when he and his group of friends would hang out. The official trio was Abigail, Sam and that brings us to Sebastian. Esper sighed involuntarily as she thought of his name. He was perfect, a mysterious loner with a secret warmth to him. He spent most of his time in his basement room working at his free lance programming job, but he also played table top role playing games, ( a favorite pastime of Esper's) read comics, and had a motorcycle. He was the only other smoker in town, which was how they met at first.

               She had just come out of the mines, it was in her first autumn in the valley. She had had a particularly rough run in the caves and was feeling rather beat up. She had quit smoking  about a year ago but she could have really used a smoke then. That's when she saw him standing under a tree near the lake, smoking. She normally wouldn't have done this, but she was desperate for a smoke. She approached the tall, lean man, her voice a little shaky. "Hey, you wouldn't happen to have one to spare would you?" Sebastian turned to look at her, a little surprised as no one else smoked in this little hole of a town. His Violet eyes were met with large inquisitive Lavender ones, the eyes of someone who might run away any moment. He didn't know why, but it made him laugh. Here was this short, chubby girl, silver hair up in a messy bun on top of her head, face covered in scratches and her hands and arms not doing much better. She looked so pathetic, but there was some kind of determination in her face too, some underlying toughness under that soft face. "Heh, sure" he said , opening the pack and gesturing for her to take one.

               "Ummm, sorry, do you have a lighter too?" Esper squeaked

               "you want me to smoke it for you too?" He asked sarcastically, raising one eyebrow. He handed over the lighter and she gratefully light her cigarette and took a long slow drag. She looked sheepish.

               "Nah, I think I Can handle it" She replied with half a grin. Sebastian didn't usually find himself talking to new people all that often, but they talked that night for about an hour, smoking up half his pack of cigarettes.  They talked about all sorts of things, the mines, shadow brutes, different gems she found down there, programming, table top games, namely The Solorian Chronicles. He invited her to the next session of the game with himself , Sam and Abigail. She'd been attending  a game in his basement room every week from then on till this day.

               Esper shook herself out of her own thoughts, she always got all dreamy when she thought of Sebastian. She would never tell him, or anyone else for that matter. She was pretty sure he had a thing for Abby, and she didn't want to get in the way. Besides, someone as amazing as Sebastian would never give someone like her the time of day, not like that, not how she wanted him. Esper felt a buzzing  in her pocket, her phone chirped cheerfully from the front of her jeans. She wiped her hands on her pants and pulled it out. It was a text message from Sebastian.  "Don't forget, game tonight" was all it said, but it still made her heart flutter. He probably sent the exact same message to Abby and Sam, but it didn't matter to her.

               Esper finished her work on the farm and stood back looking at everything. Three years work had really turned this place around she thought. She grinned and headed into the house to shower and get ready for game, she usually showed up early to hang out with Sebastian for a bit while he finished up whatever job he was working on. She made quick work of her shower and put on fresh clothes, black jeans and a black V-neck Tee shirt, with her black and white checker print high-tops. She let kept her hair down and applied make up, she always wore make up to cover up the freckles across her nose and cheeks. She wasn't necessarily self conscious of the freckles, it was just that they stood out so much on her pale skin.

               Ready to go , She headed out the back entrance to the farm, closer to the mountain path to Sebastian's house. As usual, she foraged any rare plants she could find on the way over, nothing much this time of year, she had mostly foraged them dry. She liked taking the back way better than going through town for a couple reasons. For one it was much faster, secondly it avoided any run ins with people from town she didn't want to see. The first few trips to Sebastian's, she realized Haley would usually be hanging out in the park near the fountain that time of day.  She was one such person she didn't get along with what so ever. She always had something nasty to say to her, disguising it with syrupy sweet "concern" Esper could tell the difference though. She pushed the thought out of her mind, nothing was going to ruin her day.

               Before she knew it she was at the mountain home of Robin and her husband Demetrius. they lived there with their daughter Maru and son Sebastian. Though Demetrius was only Sebastian's step father. Esper let herself in as always and was cheerfully greeted by Robin.  

"Hi, Esper!", Robin chirped "Sebby is downstairs on the computer"  Esper smiled warmly at Robin.

"Thanks, I'll see myself down" Esper returned. She walked slowly down the stairs and gave a little knock before letting herself into Sebastian's room. It was a little chilly down there , thanks to the stone walls and it being a basement.

               "Hey", said Sebastian, not looking up from the computer, fingers working the keyboard furiously. "Go ahead and make yourself at home, I'm really involved in this right now, just be a few"  he mumbled as he stared at the screen. This was the way it usually happened when she would show up early for game. Sebastian would keep working for about ten to fifteen minutes and Esper would flop down on his bed catching up on his latest comics. It saved her a ton of money in comics.

               She flopped down on the bed and started rummaging through the stack of comics on the floor next to it. once she was satisfied with one, she relaxed and started reading, comfortable in her surroundings. As nervous as she could be about Sebastian, she felt oddly at home down in his basement room, there with him working, It just felt natural. The quiet hum of the electronics and Sebastian tapping away at the keyboard and mouse relaxed her so. She started to feel sleepy, she hadn't realized how tired she was. She found herself dozing, opening her eyes every few moments and then back out again.

               The next thing she knew, she started awake , comic on her chest, Sebastian had rolled over in his chair and he was looking at her with a weird look on his face. What was that look on his face, she had seen it somewhere before, but definitely not on him. Esper propped herself up on her elbows, she felt weird laying back on his bed with him so close.

               "Sorry, was I out long?" She inquired with a yawn.

"Just a few minutes" Sebastian said nonchalantly as he slid off the chair and sat on the edge of the bed, next to her. Esper scooted over a little to give him some room, and to make herself feel a little less awkward, which Sebastian took and closed the distance between them. He was now sitting almost up against her legs, angled towards her face. Esper felt her face grow hot and her heart begin to beat faster. Why was he sitting so close?

               "You know, I was kind of annoyed at first when you started coming over early while I was working,  but I've really come to enjoy your visits." Sebastian spoke matter of factly. He was not the kind of guy to sugar coat anything. He really was starting to grow more and more fond of her, and not just as a friend. Some people might judge him for liking a  chubby girl, but that didn't matter to him anymore, besides when did he ever care what anyone thought, now wasn't the time to start.

"Y-yeah?" Esper Stammered.

"Yeah", he said , getting ever so slightly closer to her. Esper swore she could see her heart start to beat out of her chest.  Sebastian was acting so weird, so completely out of character for him

"Well, we're friends, I like spending time with you" She replied. Friends, right? They were friends, this was a thing friends did, sit together like this. She kept telling herself in her head. She felt like she was going to melt with him so close to her like this. It was everything she wanted but she knew she couldn't have it. It wasn't right, she was sure there was something between him and Abigail, she couldn't get in the way. She looked around the room nervously, looking anywhere but his face.

               Sebastian reached out and ran his fingers through a lock of her silver hair, playing with it. His fingers brushed her cheek as they tangled into her long hair. She couldn't help her eyes going a little wide, her face somehow felt even hotter than before.

"Right, good friends" Sebastian murmured as he began to lean in closer. She couldn't take it anymore, her heart was racing, but her mind was racing faster yet. What was going on, Friends, they were friends. She couldn't betray Abigail, she was her best female friend, if she let this happen and she ever found out maybe she'd never speak to her again.  Maybe Sebastian was just leaning in to tell her a secret she told herself, knowing it wasn't true. Anything to cloud the truth, she couldn't handle this, she just didn't know how to process it.

               Just as Sebastian was about to lean in bit closer, she leapt from the bed, practically knocking him over. She grabbed her pack and booked it for the door. Sebastian looked flabbergasted.

"W-Where are you going?" He asked with a start

"I, Uh, I forgot I had a doctor's appointment" Esper lied, and he knew she was lying. Esper avoided Harvey like the plague. She wouldn't make a doctor's appointment unless she was dying, and even then would probably have to dragged there. Sebastian furrowed his brow.

"What about game?" He asked

"I'm going to have to miss it tonight" she said, her back to him, already opening the door and making her way up the stairs. He tried to go after her, but she was already up the stairs and leaving by the time he was up.

"Hey Esper, did you forget something" Robin asked, a concerned look on her face as she pretty mush ran past her to get out the front door. Esper gave a hurried nod as she ran out the front door, she didn't stop running. She ran all the way to the farm on the mountain path, to the back entrance and didn't stop until she was in her own front door. She slumped up against it as she shut it, beginning to cry. I'm such an idiot... she thought.

#stardew valley #stardew valley sebastian #original character #fanfiction #eventual smut #rusty #i havent written in a whil