fuck fucking him. i wanna be in his lap while he cries into my chest. his hands wrapped around me in the tightest hug he’s ever felt, my hands in his hair, stroking softly to let him know that everything is okay.
Being a hopeless romantic aroace is just wishing you were in a relationship but then when actually given the chance you feel like throwing yourself off a cliff
Yes, it is difficult to love, to give all your time, your effort, your energy, your attention. To do anything for someone, to be there for them no matter what. But people don’t talk about how hard it is to let someone love you. To let someone hold you, let them listen to your thoughts and feelings. Let someone in. To let them kiss the scars on your skin, on your soul. Let them heal your wounds. To let them adore you, admire you. Let them stare into your heart and love it for all its imperfections. To let them adore and admire you, and not feel bad. Not feel ashamed and guilty. To accept the love you were so eager to give back. To let someone love you.
I've never cared about a sapphic couple as much as i care about the ann(e)s in season 1.
I honestly haven't seen that many shows with sapphic couples because they end up getting canceled and i don't really want to watch canceled shows with no real endings.
When i watched season 1 couple of years ago i didn't get this attached but now that I've rewatched it i genuinely can't stop thinking about them.
Maybe couple of years ago i had more internalized homophobia and homophobia in general.. i remember being so uncomfortable watching the scene where anne was going down on a woman. (speaking of being uncomfortable i pretty much didn't watch orange is the new black because i think the first scene was the main character taking a shower with another woman and i just couldn't watch it.. Maybe it's also because i live in a religious conservative country..)
But yes I've never cared about a sapphic couple this much. It's also probably why I'm so sad and disappointed with season 2.. i literally just can't stop thinking about the softness, happiness, angst and pain of season 1.. it was so good and i just love them so much.
I'm definitely a helpless romantic and i love love and i love their love (especially in season 1) i think about them reuniting in the finale of season 1, both of them tearing up, happy to be near eachother again and it was so beautiful that's how i want to think of those characters, their relationship and their love.
the older i get the more i want a cute pure wholesome relationship. I want to send handwritten love letters with wax seals tied with ribbon to each other, write small notes and surprise them with it, go stargaze together, go on a picnic and feed each other strawberries, hold hands. I my hair stroked as we read books together, long warm embraces, dancing in the rain and hot chocolate by the fire. I want to adore and cherish them, because if i ever dated someone i would give them my everything, my heart my mind my soul. I just want to love and be loved in return.