#heart check

[beingthelightinthedarkness]

To Hope...

To Hope…

I have become a pessimist. Growing up, I believed in impossible things. I believed in miracles. I believed things would eventually work themselves out. Now, however, I always find myself thinking of the worst possible scenarios, some not even possible. This flip has been somewhat gradual over the past decade or so, driven by the multitude of challenges faced over the years and my bodies own…

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#2022 #acceptance #advice #be the light #being the light in the dark #beingthelightinthedark #breaking free #challenges #change #daily life #embrace #faith #food for thought #growth #healing #heart check #help #hope #inaction #journey #life #life lessons #light in the darkness #me #moving #opinion #pain #people #perception #perseverance

[riacte]

not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]

#'your moon is here' things that make me explode like a supernova #UGHHHHHHH what if i was perpetually in your orbit. influencing the tides. protecting you from asteroids. and slowly drifting further away. #then you stopped moving and i was only pulse to your dead heart. orbiting you. right where ive been left. and so you started turning again. #ria.txt #personal #space opera au #(<- not about what you think is about) #hiiii this is gaining traction so glad we're all going insane :D your moon is here is SO fucked up. so good. #xkcd #randall munroe #space #moon #anyways xkcd comics are so good. entertaining witty and informative. check em out!

[missy4201]

#2 days left #heart monitor #low blood pressure #high pulse #heart check #abnormal rhythm #chronic illness #chronically ill

[shadowtraveled]

"mithrun is the only real monsterfucker in dungeon meshi" is objectively the funniest bit you can get out of his everything, but in all seriousness i think his attraction to his love interest is deliberately overstated—and that makes sense, because romantic jealousy is a classic and digestible motive, which is explicitly what kabru was aiming for in condensing mithrun's backstory, and also because until chapter 94, mithrun wasn't willing to admit to the true nature of his desires.

but because romantic envy is both classic and digestible, it probably isn’t a unique enough or complicated enough desire to tempt a demon’s appetite. mithrun’s wish, as far as we can figure from kabru’s reduced retelling, was to have a life in which he had never become one of the canaries, and that carries like 3857 implications and desires within it. that’s delicious. his love interest acts as sort of a red herring to his motivation for making it, though. (side note: i'm saying "love interest" here because, keeping in mind that i barely speak japanese on a good day anymore, "想い人" is something i'd usually take as just kind of an old-fashioned and romantic way to refer to a lover, but in context i wonder if both the connotation of yearning and the vagueness are intentional, and i think this phrasing gets those aspects of it more effectively. anyway.)

mithrun considered his love interest to be untrustworthy. there was a minute where i thought that comment might be about a similar-looking elf (yugin, one of his squad members), but comparing the two…

the "sketchy" arrow is definitely referring to the elf we know as his love interest—the bangs go toward her right, she only has the one forehead ornament, and, most notably, her ears aren't notched.

every time she’s given a full-body depiction in his dungeon, she’s drawn as a chimera, with the body of a snake from the waist down. (side note: the “what if a dungeon has chimeras before reaching level 4?”/“then the dungeon lord is unstable” exchange just being mithrun grilling his past self alive is so funny. he’s so. but anyway) there are a couple things about this.

first, the snake part of the chimera appears to be modeled after some species of coral snake mimic

which, in the biology-for-fun manga, i… doubt is a coincidence, especially with the added context of the “untrustworthy” comment. the dungeon’s conjured illusion of mithrun’s love interest was a harmless copycat of a venomous original. for whatever reason, he felt this person was a threat and made up a "safe" version of her to be in a relationship with, and while it’s definitely possible to be attracted to or even love someone you find to be toxic and/or intimidating, when you take that into consideration alongside the configuration of her body, you get some interesting implications.

which brings us to our second point: if we assume that mithrun was not in fact fucking a snake, then sexual attraction, at least, was so far removed from his idea of a relationship with this person that he did not even bother to keep her dungeon copy human enough to maintain the illusion of the option of a sexual relationship. this is somewhat echoed in the depictions of their interactions, which also imply a frankly unexpected romantic distance. she kisses his cheek and he doesn't seem to react; she's at the edge of a narrow bed with only one set of pillows, on top of his blankets while he's underneath them.

the kiss is particularly interesting because it seems to contrast the text. kabru's narration tells us this was everything mithrun could have asked for, but mithrun is there looking unreadable to pensive, likely because this is right before the panel that makes it clear things in the dungeon are beginning to go wrong.

walking through this backwards for a minute, we have the physical barrier of his bedding and the spatial separation inherent in a bed made for one person, the emotional barrier of his mounting anxiety getting in the way of his ability to enjoy the affection he sought, and... the snake, which historically carries the connotation of temptation, yes, but also mistrust, barring physical intimacy. okay. ok. if a dungeon reflects the mentality of its lord, all of this might suggest that mithrun was not able to have any real desire for a relationship with this person. his unwillingness to be vulnerable or let another person in was insurmountable. but in that case, why was she such a focal point that she remained to the end, after his dungeon had stopped creating iterations of his friends to come and visit him? why would he get so upset over her meeting with his brother that he became lord of a dungeon about it?

well. mithrun's brother was also interested in her, probably genuinely. and mithrun had to win.

you have an older brother who your parents completely ignore, probably in part because he is chronically ill/disabled and almost definitely in part because he received a ton of recessive traits that resulted in rumors that he was an illegitimate child. you are aware, most likely because those same parents fucking told you, that you actually are an illegitimate child. but they keep you around because you had the good fortune of looking just like your mother. what can that possibly teach you but that you, like your brother, are disposable?

it's utterly unsurprising that mithrun, under these circumstances, developed a pathological need to be better than everyone around him. people don't keep you otherwise. i'd argue this is also why he says he looked down on everyone he knew while milsiril claims his dungeon reeked of feelings of inferiority—he sought out people's worst traits and prioritized them in his mind to protect his already extremely fragile sense of self-worth, and all the while he tried to be as likable and high-performing as he possibly could be. his parents disposed of him anyway, but even then he tried to keep up the performance. he was kind to everyone. he never once lost to a dungeon.

when he saw his "love interest" meeting up with his brother, what he saw was himself being replaced by a person his parents had always treated as worthless, and if that was what they thought of the child they'd kept, what value could anyone possibly see in the bastard they'd given away to die? mithrun and kabru tell the story like he wanted to win this unnamed elf's heart, but it was never about being with her. it was about cementing his worth, proving that he didn't deserve to be thrown away.

and so it's particularly cruel that his demon discarded him, too. but maybe it's also particularly gentle that, in the end, there was someone who refused to even consider giving up on him.

kui laid it out in three panels better than i could hope to.

yeah. it's love. you wanted to be loved, even when the only way you were able to understand it was through the desire to be wanted, and you wanted that so badly that the idea of being consumed felt like the promise of finally mattering to someone.

#dungeon meshi spoilers #mithrun #dungeon meshi #this has been rotating for a while but i wanted to check my evidence before getting into it thanks user angelspenance for posting that meme #half of this is just the text and the other half i'm sure has been said before but it's making my brain [radio static] so here this is #someone did for sure mention this but i do find it very cute that in his fucked up conjured world meant to portray his ideal reality #his teammates came to visit him. like part of the fantasy was then explicitly that they cared about him and were his friends. even though #he says he tried to see the worst in them. #hm it does feel important to note that i do also believe 100% in mithrun suicidality--his desire to be eaten does seem to focus a lot on #wanting it to be Over. wanting not to be left incomplete and empty anymore. #but that loops back around a bit to the hole in your heart that appears when you feel unloved. it's many things and the same thing at once #snakes #long post #severe problems #meshy

[thequeenofmyownscreen]

You know the plan is going great when the DM does this :

#I love the captions (and the people doing it) with my WHOLE HEART #critical role #cr spoilers #cr campaign 3 #CRE3E90 #it took me forever to capture those captions but WORTH IT #are we in Keyfish territory in termes of damage ? I'll check #[edit : no we are not. Keyleth took 363 points of damage going down that cliff that one glorious time]

[plutonicbees]

season 1 tao's "once you get into a relationship, friendships don't matter anymore" vs season 2 charlie writing "charlie ♡ tao" on the heart locket + "wait, isn't that for you and nick?" "no."

sorry yeah I'm just lil emotional over the portrayal of platonic love as something that can be just as worthy as romantic love. i'm okay.

#my heart melted at this scene actually. their friendship is so important to me #also i love tao's complicated relationship with romantic vs platonic dynamics and what's expected of them #tao xu #charlie spring #heartstopper #heartstopper season 2 #heartstopper spoilers #heartstopper tv #heartstopper netflix #william gao #joe locke #heartstopper s2 #also charlie's 'no' was so gutteral i had to rewind and check that it was a real sound 😭

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...

#the song is 'in your eyes' by peter gabriel #boombox serenade lets GO!!! #in my mind immediately after this the others came over to say hi (or in sallys case tell him off) #and at first howdy's like 'oh ofc wallys there that makes sense. sally too? strange but alright' #then eddie appears and ohhhh boy its Jealousy Central Babey and howdy's train just pulled into the station #scribble salad #laughingstock #welcome home #barnaby x howdy #howdy x barnaby #OK CONTEXT I PROMISED CONTEXT #so in my mind howdy is an oblivious dumbass when it comes to his own romantic feelings. #he's so in love with barnaby (its very obvious) but Doesnt Realize It. despite being a god tier flirty fruity motherfucker #so when barnaby - thinking theyre on the same page - confesses #howdy's all like 'ohhh um. gee barn im flattered truly but - i just dont like you like that' #yk breaking barnaby's heart right down the middle #so barnaby shuts himself in his home and wally is hovering. yk Worried #and eddie - who's been helping barnaby come to terms w/ his own feelings & gauge if howdy feels the same - asks sally to check in for him #& sally goes over and Immediately involves herself. she takes personal offense on barnaby's behalf #also she lives for the drama and wants every juice detail Hot Off The Press #so while howdy is having a lil crisis as he slowly realizes Oh My Fucking God I DO Love Barnaby Like That- #barnaby / sally / wally / (eventually) eddie are all having a sleepover where they just play card games and chat #a good ol bitch n' stitch night #and howdy shows up to try and talk to barns (obvs in my head he doesnt have a boombox he just Knocks) #only to get RE-RE-RE-REJECTEDDDDDD!!!! thats how it feels you wormy mf! #bc barnaby is a) having a girls night & b) needs to emotionally prepare for That conversation #aaaaand THATS the context <3

[olasketches]

two sides of the same coin

#itadori yuuji #ryomen sukuna #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #my art #jujutsu kaisen fanart #brainrot incoming (pls don’t mind me) #one thing sukuna and yuuji have in common is that they’re both absolutely miserable #sukuna is utterly selfish and yet it only made him hollow inside and now he’s just killing time waiting for death to come #yuuji is completely selfless and yet it’s only made him suffer and bc of that he’s been constantly trying to check out of life #and I think the funniest but also the most painful thing about these two is that… #despite that they’re vastly opposite they might be the only people that can understand each other the most #imagine them having a heart to heart lol maybe then they would realise some things about themselves

[deva-arts]

Aaaaand here it is, the next installment of our Merman Valley series...

MerShane! (And Jas :D)

They went scavenging for human trinkets lost on the surface. Jas found a human-polished shell and Shane got a little chicken pendant! it was a good day :>

Here's our previous winners, who were decided by poll. Keep an eye out for future polls to decide who is next to get merm'ed!

(...I love them so much)

#stardew #stardew valley #shane stardew valley #stardew valley bachelors #sdv shane #stardew shane #jas sdv #jas stardew valley #merman valley #I had so much fun drawing jas #she's so bubbly and adorable #I also used some rougher lineart this time! fun! #Shane you got a lil booboo on your heart there #Might wanna check that out :(

[ryllen]

"Don't u know what u're asking me with these?

'Abandon the sea, and stay on land'"

"Are you sure you know~ what u're getting into, Trey-san?"

[x] [x] [x]

#treyjade #AUGH WHEN TREYJADE ARTIST DOES SUCH A BEAUTIFUL WRITING I CAN'T LEAVE ALONE & JUST HAVE TO TELL THE WORLD WITHOUT EXACTLY REPOSTING IMAGES #FIRST LINK FIRST LINK CHECK THE FIRST LINK AUGHHHH!!!!! THE JADE REACTION IS SO MOEEE~~ yes it's kinda different to the way i draw him here #THE SECOND AND THIRD LINKS ARE JUST AS NICE & FUNNY I LEAVE THEM THERE AS A TREAT for treyjaders!!!!!!! #twst #twisted wonderland #jade leech #the description of the third link STABS me right AT THE FUNNY BONE IN MY HEART #'When I was at the sea there was food swimming everywhere...' #JAAAAAAAAAAAAADEEEEEEEEEE FSDHSDHSHDSH #HE THINKS THE SEA IS OPEN WORLD CAFETARIA FHSDHSDHSDH #HE'S TOO CUTEEEEE ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #I JUST IMAGINE HIM DOING SOMETHING TOTALLY RANDOM AND SUDDENLY HIS HAND JUST WENT AND GRAB A FISH AND PUT IT INTO HIS MOUTH IN A MATTER OF #SECOND FHSDHSDH #AJA DE #AND THIS KEEPS HAPPENING EVERY 5 MINUTES INTERVAL FHSDHSDH #THE SECOND LINK IS JUST GOLD THROUGH AND THROUGH FHSHDSDH #SO MOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAUGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TREEEEEYYJJJJJAAAAAADEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[elitadream]

As soon as I began receiving asks about Junior regarding my body swap concept a few days ago, I knew I wanted to add him in a short sequence. 💙

I've considered many different scenes in which he would be included, but there was one in particular that kept coming back to my mind, and it was the exact moment he would agree to safely lead Luigi to "Bowser" (aka Mario). In this specific scenario, he would be mostly oblivious to what's going on, and would thus show palpable mistrust towards Luigi at first, who he doesn't really know and hasn't yet opened up to. But upon seeing how distraught the poor man is, Junior would feel for him and let his guard down. 🤲

#I've hesitated SO MUCH on which scene to pick for this one omg #There was the whole other hypothetical tangent in which Jr would meet with Bowser!Mario first and realize the truth sooner #Which Keakruiser did admirably well!! 👏 #Btw please go check out the oneshots they made and which I've shared on my page - I really love their version too 🥺✨ #Everyone who has written something about my AU: y'all are AMAZING ❤️ #The different interpretations are great honestly :3 #And for this one I kept wanting to portray how much Luigi has been affected emotionally by the ordeal so far ;_; #so much so that even Junior would be swayed by it #The kid has a softer heart than his dad 💖 #Mario #Luigi #Junior #Bowser Jr #body swap #personal concept #drama #mild angst #hurt/comfort #unexpected support #Super Mario Bros #fanart

[catboygirljoker]

breaking news

xigbar has died badly

#IF YOU FOUND THIS FROM SEARCHING FOR XIGBAR #check the notes for tuck him in tuesday. heh. you might like what you see. (end of tags i added later long after posting this) #i think next they will arrest me or maybe put me down for having too much fun with blender #i dont. i dont know why those polygons near his butt look like that. i prommy i cant do anything about it #ps i love him i love him i am doing this to him from a place of love #kh #kingdom hearts #xigbar #blender fun #luxu

[kim-woonhak]

이젠 내게 기대 편히 쉬어도 돼 // Now you can lean on me and rest in peace 소중한 널 내 품속에 꼭 안을게 // I will hold you dear in my arms

#moonbin #moon bin #astro #*ambiv.art #here is my gift to you dear moonbin... to celebrate the joy you brought to your fans both on and off stage #and the millions of hearts that you have touched including mine. thank you .. i hope you sleep well 🌙☁️ #tonight is especially dark because there's a new moon in the sky....i knew this in my bones without even looking outside or checking online #(but i did anyways. and then i looked up that other date and it was the same...💔) #to everyone who sees this... i'm hugging you firmly 💞 please take care. it's lame but drink lots of water it really does help 🥺 #caption is lyrics from sanha's solo Wish ☹️🫶 #*1k #*2k #*3k

[xsafronix-blog]

I just leave this here :D

#cod mw2 #ghost #ghost x soap #simon ghost riley #soapghost #ghoap #ghostsoap #soap x ghost #john soap mactavish #call of duty modern warfare #Don't check ghost's tattoo #I draw some hearts on his hand #I don't have chibi style but I have more cartoon style so here we are

[bribinart]

My piece for the @legacies-entwined zine from last year!!

I'm so excited to be able to share this with y'all and grateful to have worked with so many incredible artists on this project-- If you're interested in grabbing the zine and/or any merch we made, you can snag it on Feb. 22nd at the leftover sale!! <3

(prints)

#i love seeing everybody's pieces again ah my heart #go check em out!!!!!! #my art #cal kestis #jedi fallen order #jedi survivor #jaro tapal #star wars #star wars fanart #fanart #zine #star wars zine

[everrose]

when anxiety crawls

Anxiety thinks too little about our God. It blurs our perception on who God says He is. And it belittles our worth in the eyes of a loving, good, and perfect God.

#anxiety #personal #journey #faith #trust #declaration #heart check #reality check #waitforit #christianity