#he has loads of followers for a) the pictures of his cat he posts daily

[weresodiscxnnected]

Relationships: Peter Parker/ Original Female Character Warnings: Swearing Word count: 4862 Notes: Surprise! A Friday update! Okay, I said earlier I try to post during weekends, and Friday is the start of the weekend. I've noticed that when I write about Harley I keep thinking Luke Hemmings for some reason, so, I've just gone with the flow. For Harry I kept thinking Timothee Chalamet because of all the fancasts in tiktok. Also, a small head's up; I have a lot of important deadlines coming up, and I'm already doing everything last minute, so I'm not sure if there will be an update next week (I'm doing my best to finish both, by essays and the next chapter). I think it's good to note that the following updates will go unedited and proofread only by me since my lovely friend who is doing the proofreading for me is travelling. Thank you to everyone who is reading! I never thought someone would read this since it's something I started writing for myself for fun.

Link to the series Masterlist

Chapter 5

It was Monday morning; Peter was getting ready for his visit to the Daily Bugle before his work. The news played in the background while he was loading the coffee maker. He adds one more scoop of coffee grounds into the maker as he hears Melissa’s door go. The clicking of high heels on the hardwood floors echoes in the hallway before Melissa arrives in the room. She was wearing a lavender coloured pants suit with high heels, and her hair was in a low ponytail. It was different from what Peter had used to seeing the girl in.

“What’s the occasion?” Peter lifts his eyebrow, leaning into the counter next to him.

“There are these end-of-the-year development interviews for all the staff, and they’re making me sit through them with Aida to take notes. Or, how I put it, I’m just there to look pretty and pretend I understand what they’re talking about.” Melissa sighs, sitting on the barstool.

Peter remembered how Tony used to hate those interviews, yes, they were beneficial, but they were also tedious. First, every head of the department would interview the people working under them, and then the director would be interviewed by Tony or Pepper; usually, Pepper and Aida did the job. He had been in that interview once, and it had been enough for him.

“You’re going to the Bugle today?” Melissa asks when Peter hands her a cup of coffee.

“Yup,” Peter nods, pouring himself a cup.

“So, are you an aspiring journalist or something?”

“Not really. I just sent these shots I got of Spiderman. Thought it would be a nice way to get more money” the boy sips his coffee.

“Harassing superheroes in your free time, Parker, I would’ve never guessed.”

“No, we’re cool; we’re like buddies.”

“You sold your buddy to the media who mocks him all the time?”

“It was his idea; he wants to keep his identity, so, instead of thousands of people taking pictures of him, he just has one whom he knows.”

There was something behind Peter’s words that Melissa didn’t swallow. She knew he was lying; she could see it. However, she didn’t say anything, she didn’t want to scare the boy, knowing she would out herself in the process. So, she just decided to play it cool.

“Okay, Paparazzi Parker. I can give you Daredevil’s address or Deadpool’s if you want to harass more masked vigilantes.” Melissa winks.

“No thanks, I think I'll stick with Spiderman,” Peter scratches his neck.

“Good choice”, Melissa mumbles in her mug while she scrolls her phone.

They spend the rest of their morning coffee in silence while Melissa scrolls Instagram and Peter watches the news. Nothing new for either of them, it was comfortable silence. The girl likes pictures of people she knew distantly, like Gwen, the girl who worked in the lobby of the Stark Tower. She posted a picture of her cats cuddling. Or Ned, the IT intern she had met twice, but he seemed to be friends with Harley and Harry, so she had followed him back. Apparently, Ned had recently gotten engaged and was now posting a picture with his fiance. Melissa’s Instagram moment is ruined by Happy, who has just texted telling her he was waiting downstairs.

“I need to go”, she mumbles, getting up from the barstool. Peter glances at the girl first, then the clock and realises he needs to leave as well. The boy shuts down the Tv before turning off the coffee maker and cleaning the mugs in the sink. Melissa pulls her coat on when Peter meets her in the hallway. Grabbing his jacket and back bag, Peter follows the girl out of the door, locking it on his way.

The elevator ride was quiet, but the silence was quick to end when they reached the front door and saw it was pouring outside.

“Shit!” Peter curses; he had forgotten his umbrella upstairs. He was never going to make it dry to the Daily Bugle. Melissa looks at the car where Happy was waiting for her. She then looks at Peter, who had already started to walk back to the elevator to get his umbrella.

“Happy can drive you; the office is close by the tower, it’s; it’s not a big detour” Melissa shrugs, knowing Happy wouldn’t be happy, but they had plenty of time, and she felt bad for Peter.

“Really?” Peter turns around.

“Yeah, let's go” Melissa nods towards the car, opening the door. They sprinted towards the car, holding their coats over their heads to cover themselves from the rain.

Finally getting into the car and relatively dry, Melissa and Peter look at each other, smiling; their mission was successful.

“Hey, what’s this? Who is this?” Happy’s head snaps to the backseat.

“Happy, this is Peter, my flatmate. He has a meeting in the Daily Bugle, and I couldn’t let him walk there soaked. It’s not a big detour. Please, Happy,” Melissa explains, batting her eyelashes at the man sitting in the driver’s seat.

Happy’s eyes scanned Peter, and Peter could feel the nervousness rising. Part of him hoped Happy would recognise him, and part of him feared that he’d recognise him. He had only met him once, on May’s grave, but he didn’t remember him. Happy then sighs and looks at Melissa, still making her best puppy impression.

“Fine, but I’m not a taxi, Mel.”

“Yay! Thank you, Happy!”

Twenty-something minutes later, the car stops in front of a large building with massive screens that play the news clip from the Bugle. The letters Infront of the building are written in yellow. Peter thanks Melissa and Happy before getting out of the car. Covering himself with his jacket, he jogs into the lobby.

People ran around the lobby, waving papers around and trying to catch the elevators. It was something you’d see in TV shows and movies, not in real life, or that’s what Peter thought. A big silver coloured desk with Daily Bugle written stands in the middle of everything. Behind it was a girl with blonde hair, staring at the computer with a troubled look on her face while trying to explain something on the phone. Peter couldn’t believe his eyes; it was Betty Brant, his High School classmate and Ned’s girlfriend. When he had seen her last time, she was still in college doing her degree in Journalism. Her degree and passion for journalism were only clear that she’d work somewhere like the Daily Bugle. Still, Peter wasn’t expecting to see her there.

Peter fixed his jacket and hair before he walked toward the desk. The girl glances at Peter, holding up a finger to ask Peter to wait for a second.

“Mr Jameson, I have already sent Mercado to investigate and write a report. She’s the best we have; I’ll send someone to take pictures with her.” She mumbles a few yeses and okays before putting the phone down and giving Peter her full attention. She looked the same as Peter remembered; she had shorter hair and was dressing more mature, but any other way, it was the same Betty Peter remembered.

“Uh, yeah, I’m Peter Parker, I sent material about Spiderman a few days ago, and I was told to come here for further discussion,” Peter stutters under Betty’s firm stare; he was a total stranger. It was hard not to ask how she was doing since it had been a while since they’d seen each other. Not to mention the urge Peter had to ask how Ned was doing, but he couldn’t. Betty’s face softens, and she clicks something on the computer. A few more clicks, and she finds the schedule she was looking for.

“Right! Welcome; I was told you’d be coming this morning. Let me call my boss” she smiles, taking the phone and placing it on her back again.

When she lifted the phone, a ring on Betty’s left ring finger caught Peter’s attention; that was indeed new. Has Ned gotten engaged? Peter’s guts turned, and his heart ached. The slow realisation of how many important things he was going to miss. Peter remembers how Ned used to talk about how Betty was the one and someday he would marry her. Back then, Ned had told Peter that he wanted Peter to be his best man; all of it felt distant then.  Now it was happening, and Peter couldn’t be there for his best friend.

“Mr Jameson, the Spidey photographer, is here. I’ll send him up.” She speaks, pulling Peter back to earth. “He’ll see you now, the last floor; take a right from the elevators.”

Peter thanks the girl before heading to the elevators and pressing the button to the top floor; the doors close in front of him. The gut-wrenching feeling didn’t ease. Meeting Flash was easy, but Betty was more challenging; she was closer. He never had thought about what he would do if he met people from his past. Until now, it had been easy just to avoid everyone and the places they might be. It had worked for almost a year now, but somehow, Peter felt like everyone was slowly creeping back into his life. Happy, Flash, Betty, he had managed to pretend he was a stranger for them but knowing himself, it would only get harder to act. He was afraid that he’d slip something, and it would blow his cover like it would be some counteracting to Strange’s spell, and everything would rewind into last year’s mess.

Peter jumps slightly when a man walks into the elevator on the sixth floor, nodding to Peter as a greeting and pressing the same button Peter had pressed earlier. When the elevator informs them that they’ve reached the top floor, they walk out and head right.

Peter didn’t know what to expect, he had just sent the pictures, and they told him to come around. He wondered why they didn’t just make him send his information over the email but made him come to the offices. The man from the elevator enters first into the room, followed by Peter right after.

“Well, get into that warehouse. I don’t care if the police have closed it! It’s not a coincidence that Deadpool and his little sidekick were seen there. We need to find out what is going on!” a man with slicked back grey hair yells into his phone, smashing it down in its place. “What the hell are you standing there?”

Peter jumps back, a bit shaken by surprise. He quickly fixes his position and clears his throat.

“I’m Peter Parker; I send pictures of Spiderman to you.”

“I don’t know what I was expecting but certainly not you! Anyway, I liked the material. Not the best but the best we have right now.”

“Thank you?”

The older man turns to look at the person next to Peter.

“Abernathy, How much can we pay the guy?”

“If our people had taken pictures like that, it would be around fifty bucks per pic, hundred for video and double if we use them. He sent five pics and five videos; it would make seven-hundred-fifty to cover the base and add commission after choosing what we use.”

“But he’s not working for us; I say four hundred.”

Peter was sure that the two had just completely forgotten that he was still in the room as they went on about how much he should be paid. They go back and forth before Mr Jameson speaks to Peter again.

“How did you get the pictures? How did you know where to be?”.

Peter freezes. He wasn’t expecting questions, or he was, he just wasn’t ready to answer them. 

“I-I have my ways. We’re kind of like acquaintances.”

“Acquaintances? So, you know the menace underneath the mask?”

“No, Sir. I’ve never seen him without his mask. I’ve just met him multiple times. He swings a lot in the area I live in.”

The older man squints his eyes; he can tell Peter hides something. If he knew Spiderman, he could be a valuable source for the Daily Bugle and perhaps, he could help them unmask the son of a bitch.

“I’ll give you a deal, kid. I’ll pay you a thousand if you bring me new pictures by Wednesday, and I’ll hire you as a photographer for Spiderman.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Peter would have to double-take if he heard the man correctly. He can’t be saying what Peter thinks he’s saying.

“You heard me; I’m offering you a job. I will get more pictures by Wednesday; I’ll give you 1000, and you’ll become Spiderman’s photographer since you can do the job better than our current photographers.”

So, Peter’s ears and mind weren’t deceiving him after all. Mr Jameson was offering him a job. Peter nods and crosses his arms on his chest.

“What would that job include except taking pictures of Spiderman?”

Now, it was the man next to Peter who talked. “Like I earlier mentioned, it would be fifty for a picture, a hundred for video, double if used, plus minimum wage for the first year. Office hours would be nine to five every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. On other days you’d come if needed. Almost every photographer here works as a freelancer under the same rules.”

“Take it or leave it; I’ll pay you four hundred now, and you leave or thousand on Wednesday, and I’ll hire you.” Mr Jameson leaned back in his chair.

Peter might be losing his mind, but the conditions he was given sounded like a dream compared to his current job. No more yelling customers, no graveyard shifts where he had to sit behind the counter and hope someone would need something at four in the morning, no itchy bright green polyester vest. He could make money for being Spiderman and show up to the office three times a week.

“It’s a deal.”

“I’m waiting for those pictures on my desk at nine on Wednesday morning, Parker. And they need to be publication quality!”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good, now, get lost. I need to figure out what Deadpool is up to.”

Without saying anything, Peter leaves the room, heading to the elevator. Before he can reach it, he is stopped by Abertnathy.

“I have to say; you’re a crazy kid. The deal is good, but you have no idea what you got yourself into.”

“He’s waiting for me to fail, so he doesn’t have to pay?”

“Pretty much. Our team has been chasing Spiderman for a year now, and the best we got was pixelated CCTV material and blurry pictures from afar. One guy swears he was taking pictures of Spiderman when it was clearly a woman”

“Well, I have my ways, trust me” Peter walks into the elevator, leaving the man to just stare at the closing doors.

Peter pulls out his phone, excited to tell the news to his friends already typing a message, but when he’s about to press send, the realisation hits him. He didn’t have anyone to tell. It would be weird if a random number sent “Guess what! I just got offered a job!” nowhere. So, he deletes the message. When he’s about to close the messaging app, one name catches his eye on top of his message list. Maybe he did have someone he could tell the news about; hesitantly, he clicked the name. Peter was sure she wasn’t going to answer him, and he was probably interrupting her work, but still, he typed the message.

Peter: Guess what? I got offered a job at the Daily Bugle!

The elevator blings as it reaches the ground floor, opening the doors and revealing a group of people waiting to get in. Awkwardly the boy walks out of the elevator, making room for the people wanting to go up. He waves Betty at the front desk before heading out. When he steps outside, he is reminded that it is still pouring. For Peter’s luck, the closest Subway station where he could get a train to work was next to the Stark Tower, an almost ten-minute walk away.

He had no choice but to walk. Sprinting towards the station like him running would make him or his journey any drier. The water splashed under his sneakers, soaking his jeans. Peter didn’t even bother to cover his hair. It would be wet anyway. Because of the rain, the streets were relatively empty; no one wanted to go outside in weather like this unless they had to. He finally makes it to the station, putting his super-speed and reflexes into work, dodging the umbrellas of the one poor tourist group roaming the streets.

When he finally gets into the train, he’s dripping wet, like he had gone into a shower with his clothes on, hoping his phone and headphones in his pocket weren’t soaked as well. Pulling out his phone, he sighs in relief, seeing it is dry. Checking the phone, he finds out that he has one new message.

Melissa: oh, wow, congrats? not sure how to react, if it’s a good thing or a bad thing.

Peter: Thank you! I took the offer, so I guess it was a good thing. How’s your work?

Peter writes and deletes the last sentence multiple times before leaving it and sending it.

Melissa: i guess it’s time for proper congratulations! paparazzi parker ;) and boring; they keep talking about growth rates, marginals, and sales volumes.

Peter: Oh, I’m sorry! Am I interrupting? Didn’t mean to.

Melissa: nah, it’s okay. i’m texting Cindy as well. they don’t even notice. so, tell me about your new job.

Peter: Well, I don’t have the job yet. I need to bring them new pictures of Spiderman by Wednesday morning, and if the pics are good, they’ll hire me.

Melissa: that sounds sketchy, but if they like the previous ones, they will like the new ones as well.

Melissa: okay now aida is giving me a funny look, i better stop. talk to you at home x.

Peter: Good luck with the rest of your day!

*************************

It was almost two o’clock when Melissa was freed from the Interviews. It didn’t mean that her workday was over; no, it meant Morgan would be home from school soon, and her job as some sort of secret agent turned into a nanny. Happy was picking Morgan up since it was still pouring, and Melissa refused to drive a car in New York City.

So, Melissa decided to spend the little break she was given doing what she did best, annoying her friends in the labs. She strutted towards the engineering lab on the 12th floor. She could see two heads standing next to a computer through the windows. One with dark, almost black curls cleanly slicked back and one with messy blonde hair pointing everywhere. A big grin forms on Melissa's face as she parades into the lab after swiping her key card.

“What are we doing this afternoon?” She walks behind the figures.

“We’re doing the finishing touches on Cindy’s new suit,” The brunette says, nodding to the table on their left. A black and silver suit lays on the table, with a red spiderweb on the chest piece.

Melissa walks closer to the table, looking at Harry and Harley to ask permission to touch the suit.

“Go ahead”, Harley nods, knowing that the girl was aching to touch the suit.

Melissa carefully lifts the suit's sleeve, studying the red fingertips on the glove. Running her finger up the sleeve to the chest, she traces the red S that looks like a lightning bolt when you first look at it.

“This is so much better than mine”, She breathes out, fascinated by the suit.

“I’m not buying that; Lily made your suit.” Harry shakes his head.

“Well, it’s not that bad, but it could use upgrading. And I look like I’m cosplaying Taylor Swift when I wear it.”

“I thought you liked Taylor Swift”, Harley smirks.

“I do, but I’d like to have a little more coverage and lose the gold details. Wade keeps calling me Honeybee. It sounds like a lame version of the Wasp.”

“Technically, it is your name,” Harry points out.

“Oh, piss off, Osborn,” Melissa rolls her eyes. She plops into the chair next to the table, kicking off her heels before crossing her feet on the chair, barely fitting. Harley lets out a small laugh at sight, commenting that she never knows how to sit correctly in chairs. The girl answers with a middle finger and tells him to go back to work and pretend she doesn’t even exist.

The girl tries to listen to the boys' conversation, debating how they’re going to implant the sensory chips into the suit and how sensitive they need to be. This is where Melissa zones out; she had no clue about the technical side they were discussing, like the type of chips they’d use and what was the difference between the two chips. When they talked about chips, she thought about the French fries she had for lunch. She wasn’t super bright like the boys or a miracle child genius like her sister used to be; well, she was still a genius, just not a child anymore. Melissa could write code, she was pretty good at coding and programming, but that’s about it; her expertise lay elsewhere.

She blankly stares at the table where the boys have now flipped the suit inside out and started to attach the sensor chips to their places. Harley had put his hair into a small bun and put on his glasses. His tongue slightly peaked between his lips as he tried to place the chip in its place with a pair of curved tweezers. He carefully pressed the chip to seal it, and Harry next to him confirmed if the chip had correctly attached and it was showing up on the computer. 

Melissa sometimes forgot that her best friends were engineers and scientists, straight out of university, working for one of the biggest companies in the world. If you’d met them during free time, you’d think they were just normal twenty-three-year-olds, partying, making all the wrong choices before settling down, having pizza nights in someone’s living room while watching movies and drinking beer. They made her feel normal.

When Melissa had first met Harley, it was Tony’s funeral. Melissa had stayed back from the crowd with Lily and Aida. A tall, lanky figure with messy blonde hair had approached them, dressed in a black suit like the rest of the men there, introducing himself as Harley Keener. Tony had been a mentor to Harley over the years, helped him get into Empire, and was always ready to answer his calls when he needed help with his projects. They had met when Tony had broken into Harley’s family shed when he was 15. During the funeral, he mentioned looking for an internship to finish his engineering degree. Lily had suggested he apply to Stark Industries, as Harley already had connections, and her department was looking for two interns.

Harley then told Harry, his classmate, about the internships, and they applied; both were excellent students, and they got in with ease. Harley and Harry started the training at the same time as Melissa began her job as a nanny, meaning she spent more time in the Stark Tower. Melissa would visit her sister in the labs, who was the boys' trainer and every time, she spent more time with the boys than she spent with her sister. Cindy joined their group later that spring, she had started an internship with Dr Banner, who mainly worked in his personal laboratory, but sometimes they’d do collaborative work in the Tower labs. They studied gamma radiation and how it affected different organisms, primarily insects.

Melissa really couldn’t remember all the details of that study since it had big ‘science words’ that she couldn’t understand. Cindy had explained everything a million times to her, but she’d zone out when the words turned into something she couldn’t understand. All her friends were intelligent and successful, and she was just Melissa, a girl who dropped out of primary school at ten and had to do the rest of her education at the ripe age of nineteen, barely passing.

Melissa was glad Morgan was in the first grade, and the subjects she was learning were easy since it was her job to help the kid with her homework. Morgan didn’t really need help since she was a genius like her father, but sometimes she needed some push to do her homework since ‘it was too easy’ as Morgan had put it. Those times Melissa asked Harley to help. Morgan adored Harley, and Harley would give the girl more complicated stuff to work on to motivate the girl to do the easy stuff first. It had been under discussion if they’d move Morgan up a couple of years since she was already reading and writing fluently; her maths skills were almost the same as third graders, but Morgan herself had wanted to start from the first grade since all her friends were there.

Just then, Melissa’s phone beeps. It was Happy asking where Melissa was as he was back with Morgan. Melissa tells him to send Morgan into lab twelve D. Melissa knew that the boys wouldn’t mind Morgan; her dad had taught her well. She knew how to behave in a lab and what she was allowed to do. She loved wearing the white lab coats and safety goggles, parading around being the little scientist she was.

It didn’t take long, and Happy let Morgan into the lab before excusing himself and disappearing into the hallway. Morgan drops her school bag on the ground next to the door and tiptoes herself an oversized lab coat from the lowest coat hook. She pulls on the white jacket over her school uniform and marches toward Melissa, sitting on the chair, who greets the girl with open arms, ready to pull the girl into a bear hug.

“How was school today?” Melissa asks, letting go of the little girl.

“It was okay; we had maths in the first period, I already knew how to do everything, then in arts and crafts, we made hand turkeys since thanksgiving is this month, and we’re learning about it in history. And we ended the day with spelling exercises,” Morgan explains, barely taking any breaths between her sentences.

“That sounds like a day. Did you get homework?” The older girl takes the one sleeve of the lab coat the younger one was wearing, rolling it up, so it doesn’t get in Morgan’s way

“Yes, spelling and maths. But I know everything already, so can I go to see what the boys are doing?”

“We’ll do the homework later; you can’t start skipping homework on a first-grade, Miss. And yes, you can.” She finishes rolling up the other sleeve and pats Morgan on the shoulder.

Morgan shrieks in excitement, skipping over to Harley and Harry, carefully peeking between their figures what they were doing.

“Seems like we have top-level quality control” Harley smiles, putting down the tweezers and pushing his glasses on top of his head.

“This must be important since our boss is here”, Harry laughs, messing up Morgan's hair.

“What are you guys doing?” the girl asks, fixing her hair back.

“We are installing sensors into Silks’ new suit,” Harley explains.

The little girl looks at the inside out suit on the table, scratching her head in confusion.

“It looks weird.”

“Well, it’s inside out now, but I can show how it looks the right way.” Harley pushes himself with the saddle chair next to the computer. He clicks open a picture of the suit, and Morgan looks at the picture in amazement.

“Wow, that looks like a Spiderman suit! You’re making a suit for Spiderman?”

“No, we’re making a suit for Silk. She’s like Spiderman, but a girl.”

“There's a girl Spiderman?” Morgan exclaims.

“Yes, darling, there’s girl Spiderman.” Melissa walks up to Morgan, smiling.

“Does she know Spiderman? My daddy knew Spiderman; he talked about him a lot.”

“I don’t know. I haven’t asked,” Harley admits.

“You should ask! And then since you know girl Spiderman, she could bring the other Spiderman here and I could meet him! I want to meet Spiderman and girl Spiderman!” Morgan rambles.

“Since it's the boss’ order, we ask Silk if she knows Spiderman the next time we see her”, Harry promises.

Morgan and Melissa spend a little more time watching the boys install and test the sensors in the lab. Harley even let the girls try to install a couple of chips. Morgan gets it on right away and boasts about it to Melissa, whose shaky hands made her drop the chip on her first go. But when Morgan’s stomach rumbles, Melissa announces that it would be their time to leave to have something to eat and do Morgan’s homework. Morgan reluctantly heads out with Melissa, saying bye to the boys before the lab door closes.

#peter parker #peter parker fic #peter parker series #mcu spiderman #angst #eventual relationship #eventual romance #eventual smut #fluff #spiderman no way home #no way home #tom holland #tom holland series #tom holland fic #tom holland spiderman

[chaossmagic]

Bucky isn’t allowed on Twitter anymore after he called Mitch McConnell a cunt and told several other old, white Republican Senators to shut the fuck up.

He still has a secret John Walker troll/hate account though, which Walker 100% knows is him but can’t do anything about it because bullying a disabled army vet with PTSD for posting memes and unflattering photos about him would generally be frowned upon by his superiors.

#personal #bucky barnes #mcu #marvel #i feel like bucky would be the chrissy tiegen of twitter in the mcu #he has loads of followers for a) the pictures of his cat he posts daily #b) his utter roasting of any bigot or general idiot who dares to goad him into a fight #and c) eventually with sam's help using it as a platform to talk about his struggle as a vet with mental health issues and a physical #disability #which a lot of people look up to and find comfort in #(he also has an insta which is literally just pictures of alpine living her best life)

[dezzymalfoy]

The Descendant Part 3: The Letter

Harry slowly gets up, grabbing his glasses which he has placed next to the picture of his parents.

His only possession of them,

His parents on the left, his mum holding him while his father has his arms around them both. On the right, a similar family with a little girl, mother holding her and father wrapped around them both.

Harry looks to the back of the cardstock, and reads the words he reads oh so often,

"Her name in (Y/n) Ravenclaw"

The Raven haired boy slowly gets up and begins making breakfast for everyone, then goes to collect the post,

Grabbing all the post from the bottom of the door frame, scanning through and surprised to see something for him,

"Mr. H Potter

The Cupboard Under The Stairs,

4, Privet Drive,

Little Whinging,

Surrey"

As he gave his uncle the rest of the mail, he kept his letter and began to open it,

"Father! Harry has mail!" Dudley yells as he snatches the letter out of Harry's hand and taking it to his father,

"Give it back! That's mine!" Harry yelled at Vernon,

Vernon laughed, "Who would be writing to you?" He questioned, looking at the writing on the front, then the wax seal on the back to see four quadrants, a lion, a snake, a badger, and an eagle with an H in the middle. Looking at Petunia,

"Off to your rooms both of you, boys." Vernon says,

"But dad-" Dudley started

"NO! To your rooms!"

Harry was curious as to what that letter was, and why it brought such a reaction from his uncle.

Harry woke up the next day and yet again did his daily routine, made breakfast, served it, picked up the post,

And yet again. There's another letter.

The same exact one.

Vernon noticed there was yet another letter and threw it in the fire place.

As Harry was doing his chores, he happened to look outside and see a load of owls in the mailboxes, houses, trees, house number signs, everywhere. Harry thought this was strange, but thought nothing of it, over all.

This happened for days, the letters would come in, and soon they were the only things the Dursley's were getting though their drop box, five, ten at a time!

Every single one went into the fireplace.

Harry woke up today in a slightly sour mood, it was Sunday.

He walks into the kitchen and began breakfast, his uncle Vernon was quite chipper today, and he knew exactly why.

"Good day, Sunday, any idea why Dudley?" Vernon asks his son, to which he shakes his head

"Its because there's no post on Sunday's" Harry said gloomily,

"Right you are Harry! No post on Sunday. Not one blasted lett-"

The house had begun to shake. The fireplace roared, Petunia took Dudley into her arms to protect him.

All of a sudden, the fireplace shot out hundreds of the letters, Harry immediately going to get one of them, jumping onto one of the chairs in the living room, trying to grab one of the letters falling from above him, letters stacking up on the floor of the living room, and just as Harry almost had one in his hands, Vernon grabs the back of his shirt and drags him out to the car,

"Daddys gone mad hasn't he?" Dudley asks his mum, to which she nods.

They drove for hours on end, then rode the boat in the storm, out to a dingy cottage in the middle of nowhere,

"They'll never find us out here, never!" Vernon exclaims as they pile into the small house. Vernon and Petunia going to the room up the stairs, Dudley taking the moldy, moth eaten couch, leaving Harry with the dusty old floor and another moldy blanket.

Harry was unable to fall asleep, so, he drew a birthday cake with 11 candles and happy birthday Harry into the middle,

As soon as Dudley's watch started beeping midnight, Harry looked at the cake on the dirt covered floor,

"Happy Birthday Harry", blowing out the "candles"

As soon as Harry had blown out the last of the candles, there was banging on the door, and someone had knocked it down, Harry smartly hid beside the fireplace, out of view of the door.

Peaking around the corner, Harry saw a large figure in the middle if the doorway.

As the figure walks in, Harry heard his aunt and uncle rush down the stairs,

"Sorry 'bout tha'" said the large -man, as Harry knows now- as he proceeds to pick up the door, surprising everyone.

The fire lights up the faces of everyone in the room,

"Get out! You're trespassing on private property!" Vernon points a double barrel shotgun at the man, to which the large man bends the shotgun,

"Dry up Dursley, you great prune!"

The man looks towards Dudley,

"'arry! Been lookin' for ya! Of 'ourse you're a bi' more rou'ded since tha last 'ime I saw ya! Espec'ally there in tha 'iddle"

Harry then decided to walk out from his hiding spot,

"H-He's not Harry, I am.", making the large man turn towards him,

"Well o' course ya are! I'm Hagrid, Game'eeper at 'ogwarts, (Y/n)'s back ou'side waitin on us in tha boa'"

"Hogwarts?" Harry's curious as to what that is, and if this (y/n) is the same one from his picture.

"Well ye', where'd ya t'ink yer 'arents learnt it all? Which 'eminds me, I go' this for ya. Rec'on I may of sa' on it, made it me'self, 'ords an all, with some 'elp from (Y/n)" Hagrid hands Harry a box and a letter, the same one from the fireplaces and the post back at home.

Harry opened the box to see a bright pink cake with green icing with the words, "happee birthday haree", making Harry smile then frown, setting the cake down

"My parents?"

"Yer 'arents were wizards, 'arry, and yer one too, af'er a bit'o trainin o'course"

"I-I'm not a wizard, I'm just Harry."

"Well, just 'arry, 'as anythin ever happened, tha' ya can't explain? When ya 'ere mad or u'set?"

Harry thinks back to the zoo, to the glass and the snake, Dudley falling into the water of the enclosure, and everything makes sense,

Harry finally decides to open the letter Hagrid had given him earlier,

Dear Mr Potter,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall , Deputy Headmistress

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

UNIFORM:

First-year students will require: 1.Three sets of plain work robes (black) 2.One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear 3.One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar) 4.One winter cloak (black, with silver fastenings) Please note that all pupil's clothes should carry name tags.

COURSE BOOKS 

All students should have a copy of each of the following:

The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk

A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot

Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling

A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration by Emeric Switch

One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore

Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander

The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by Quentin Trimble

OTHER EQUIPMENT

1 wand

1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2)

1 set glass or crystal phials

1 telescope

1 set brass scales

Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad.

PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICK"

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Harry looked up from his letter as his uncle had yelled,

"We swore to put a stop to all this rubbish when we agreed to take him in!" Vernon argued,

"You knew? You knew all this time and you never bothered to tell me?" Harry was enraged that they had never told him of his wizard genes

"Oh! Of course we knew! With my perfect sister being what she was! I was the only one in the family who saw her for what she was! A freak! I knew you would be just like her. Then she had to go run off with that Potter and get herself blown up!" Petunia ranted,

"Blown up?! You told me my parents had died in a car crash!" Harry was enraged, they had lied to him! About his own parents, no less.

"Car 'rash killed 'ily and James 'otter! Cold'wap!" Hagrid yelled at the Dursley's,

"Enough! We're not paying for him to go to some school and get taught by some crack pot old fool!" Vernon yelled back

Hagrid points his pink umbrella at him, "never insul' Albus 'umbledore in fron' o' me!", then looking at Dudley, who was chowing down on Harry's birthday cake, pointing his umbrella at him and sending sparks, then making a pig tail form on his bum.

Hagrid walked out of the house as the Dursley's were freaking out about the tail that now rests on Dudley,

"Comin 'arry?" Harry smiled and runs out of the house, following Hagrid out to the boat, seeing a small girl laid down in the middle, sleeping.

"Ah, poor 'irl, must've fallen 'sleep, 'arry, tha is (y/n)"

[feynavaley]

Hetalia Miraculous Ladybug AU

(Or, I spent about 2 hours with an 11-year-old explaining me everything about this show so now you’re getting this.)

The characters aren’t completely like the ones from the show (which I haven’t even watched), I just thought about somebody who might cover a similar role, but their personalities are their own and presumably different from the ones of the canon characters. (Besides, keep in mind that all my knowledge comes from a brief look through the Wikia pages and the explanation of an 11-year-old. A very exhaustive explanation, but still.)

- Marinette/Ladybug: Michelle Bonnefoy (Seychelles). Daughter of a Parisian baker, Francis Bonnefoy (France) and a Seychellois woman (Angélique, an OC). She spent her early childhood in Seychelles and went back to Paris with her father after her mother’s death. Michelle has a great passion for fashion (inherited from her father, even if he eventually chose a different profession) and dreams of becoming a fashion designer. She’s optimistic, friendly, and lively, with a positive view of people and the world in general. She never turns back from somebody in need and is always eager to be helpful in any way she can. She can be a bit shy when she first meets somebody, but once she opens up, she’s an extrovert. She would like to do loads of things at once but sometimes she doubts her abilities, she needs some encouragements. She can also be quite clumsy, at times. As Ladybug, she displays more confidence (which lets her intelligence and quick thinking shine, since she doesn’t let her insecurities sway her) and is extremely dedicated to her job.

- Alya: Amelia Jones (Nyo!America). A new classmate of Michelle’s, has been in France for just a few years and still misses America. Energic, headstrong, and with a strong sense of justice, she wants to one day become an investigative reporter because she thinks it would be a good way to bring to light important stories and make her contribution to the world (and she thinks it would be exciting, too). She stands up for Michelle against bullies and they become best friends from there, she’s very supportive and protective. In fact, she’s very friendly and open in general, a total extrovert. She can also be a bit too obstinate and overconfident at times, though. And the fact she always says what she thinks can be both a blessing and a curse. On a different note, she’s also extremely athletic – she has done lots of sports, with her last interest being kickboxing. Once Ladybug appears, Amelia starts investigating on her not only to cover the story but also because she wants to help and become a superhero herself (she eventually does earn a miraculous too).

- Adrien/Chat Noir: Matthew Kirkland (Canada – his surname has been changed for plot reasons.) Only son of the owners of a famous fashion brand and also one of their main models (even if not by his own choice). He grew up sheltered and isolated, not being allowed to have contact with his peers except for a few selected ones. He has been brought up to excel – advanced curriculum, several foreign languages, playing piano, fencing, and above all, impeccable manners. His father’s expectations and detached demeanour, united with his mother’s subtly oppressive and controlling one, made him develop an awfully low self-esteem. He’s polite, quiet, and kind-hearted, but quite clumsy and always doubting himself in social interactions as he isn’t used to it and tends to miss some clues/convince himself he’s missing clues even though he actually isn’t. Due to his strict upbringing, he also has trouble standing up for himself and letting the dorkier parts of his personality show as they were deemed ‘undesirable’ and ‘undignified’ by his mother (she said it in a much sweeter and apparently supportive way, but that was the meaning). As Chat Noir, he lets his dorky side shine because he thinks that’s how a superhero’s supposed to act (and that it’s cool – he doesn’t realize it makes him look like he isn’t taking things seriously). Extremely dedicated to Ladybug. He’s actually a good tactician but he’s so focused in his role of protecting Ladybug (and not confident enough in his intellect, on top) that he ends up acting mainly on instinct just to do that instead of coming up with plans.

- Gabriel Agreste/Hawkmoth: Arthur Kirkland (England). Owner and executive manager of an extremely famous fashion brand. He’s not the designer himself, though – that was his wife Marianne (Nyo!France) before her ‘mysterious’ disappearance. Growing up with distant parents and insecure, Arthur doesn’t know how to connect with Matthew and had always left the job to his wife, whom he felt was a much better person than himself. After Marianne got sick and later slipped into a coma due to the damaged Peacock miraculous, he donned the Butterfly miraculous in order to retrieve the Cat and Ladybug ones and get Marianne back at the cost of his own life (erroneously convinced he can decide the price of the wish on his own). The fact he’s planning to sacrifice himself is also part of the reason he’s so cold and stern with Matthew – he doesn’t want Matthew to get too attached to him. Yet, his love for Matthew (and feeling on inadequacy as a paternal figure) translate in him being extremely protective and controlling in order to keep Matthew safe. In addition, he tries to micro-manage every aspect of Matthew’s life as he’s convinced it’s the best to make his life as good as possible in the long run.

- Nathalie: Sakura Honda (Nyo!Japan). Arthur’s assistant. Always detached, formal, and extremely efficient, but she’s actually very fond of her boss (she admires his dedication) and ended up falling in love with him. She would go to great lengths to ensure his well-being and success, she doesn’t even hold back from using the Peacock miraculous (and damaging her own health) in order to help Arthur. Sakura also ended up becoming equally fond of Matthew; even if she isn’t able to express it outwardly (or even fully admit it to herself), she cares for him as if he were her own son, at this point.

- Nino: Carlos Machado (Cuba). Another classmate of Michelle’s – actually, he was one of the first people who welcomed her when she moved to Paris and they’re still good friends. He can’t stand any perceived injustice and is quick to anger in that sense, but unless he gets provoked, he’s very laid-back and welcoming. He sees the nervous wreck Matthew is and befriends him immediately because the poor dude deserves somebody being kind to him. Later, he basically adopts Matthew and gently tries to coax him into understanding that being his real self – even if it isn’t the perfect and flawless picture he tries to project in order to make his father proud – isn’t a bad thing. (Carlos has a very low opinion of Matthew’s father.) From day one, he’s also very supportive of the new superheroes and helps from the sidelines (which is the reason he eventually earns a miraculous himself).

- Chloé: Lavinia Vargas (Nyo!Romano). This one is probably very different from the show. Lavinia’s the spoiled eldest daughter of the major who uses her influence to bully other people – in particular, those she’s jealous of. Because Lavinia’s mother is one of Arthur’s senior designers but also self-centred to the point of narcissism – she doesn’t care for anybody but herself or those who could serve her. And Lavinia, who doesn’t have any artistic talent, doesn’t. The one who, instead, is artistically talented is Lavinia’s younger twin sister, Felicia (Nyo!Italy), who is, instead, very sweet and good-natured but doesn’t dare to go against Lavinia as she’s looking for her approval. (Lavinia has never made a mystery of her jealousy – masked as disdain – towards her twin.) Moreover, their mother has dragged Felicia around the world a lot to display her talent so she hasn’t had enough time to create strong bonds with other people – and instead ended up cementing Lavinia’s resentment towards Felicia and everybody else. The only person Lavinia’s kind to is Matthew, whom she has known since childhood and bonded with due to both of them being lonely and isolated.

- Kagami: Natalya Nikolaevna Arlovskaya (Belarus). Niece of one of Arthur’s major investors, Ivan Igorovich Braginsky (Russia). Since her father died before she was even born, she was raised by her mother Iryna (Ukraine) along with her uncle (Iryna’s younger brother), who instead isn’t married and has always been very close to his sister. Iryna is very sweet and maternal, but Natalya prefers following her uncle’s footsteps. She’s cold and competitive, always pushing herself to reach the top. Along with being academically gifted, she plays the violin, does ballet, and fencing (along with Matthew). Low-key convinced that friendship and social interactions are a waste of time unless she can get something out of them, she tries to pursue Matthew romantically because of the favourable connection that match would make (Matthew’s the heir to a fashion empire, after all). Yet, she ends up becoming genuinely fond of him once she realizes the determination and strength of character hidden behind his kindness.

I want to go more in-depth into some aspects but this post is already horribly long, so I’ll do it under a read more.

- Michelle initially doesn’t feel up to being Ladybug and tries to refuse it, but after some time, she starts growing into the role and gaining a bigger confidence that also bleeds into her daily life. Ladybug also helps her become more mindful of the consequences of her actions – one of Michelle’s flaws is that she tends not to be very far-sighted.

- The interaction between Michelle and Matthew could be similar to those of Marinette and Adrien – Michelle gets a crush on Matthew (due to his kind-hearted nature) but is convinced it’s not reciprocated so she doesn’t want to confess to him. Instead, she works on becoming his friend first and they eventually get quite close.

- On his part, Matthew is completely oblivious as his self-esteem is so low he doesn’t think anybody could truly like him as a person – those who claim they like him are actually only attracted to his popularity as a model (or money).

- About this, Matthew’s actually very insecure about his appearance. Because he looks like a model – so, while he’s athletic, he’s more on the skinny and delicate side. Only a ‘pretty boy’, while he would like to be a ‘real man’.

- Apparently, Chat Noir’s a flirt but I really cannot see Matthew doing that. He certainly lets go of some of his inhibitions while he’s behind the mask so he ends up being a dork (and the fact he’s a manga nerd, which shapes his perceptions of what’s cool, doesn’t help at all). He is smitten with Ladybug, this much is true, but he ends up acting starry-eyed and clumsy instead (when he isn’t focused on the job and they’re interacting more casually).

- Matthew isn’t so confident in being a superhero, either, but since he’s unable to say no, he immediately sets to do his best instead of complaining. As time goes on, he starts liking more and more being Chat Noir for the freedom it offers him and, in a way, the lack of expectations. (Yes, he has to save Paris, but nobody knows who he is behind the mask so it feels less personal than the criticism he receives when he’s himself. Moreover, the public eye tends to be more focused on Ladybug.)

- In her effort to be Michelle’s wingwoman, Amelia gets very close to Matthew as well. Maybe she manages to spend a lot of time with him using an excuse (research for an article or something) in order to try to steer him towards Michelle, but as she starts knowing him better, she becomes very fond of him herself. In particular, Amelia recognizes his kind-hearted nature and his inability to stand up for himself and basically appoints herself as his protector and older sister. (And they find common ground in their love for video-games and manga, too.)

- Amelia and Carlos actually don’t get along, but they’re in some sort of truce for the sake of Matthew and Michelle. They still keep bickering and teasing each other, but with time, they start growing fond of each other. (They don’t end up dating, though – more like a best frenemies.)

- Carlos is one of the first people who get to akumatized as he’s easy to anger. After that experience, he starts working on his quick temper and learns to channel his anger in a more positive way. He puts a lot of effort into it and improves a lot.

- Matthew is a lot closer to Lavinia than to Felicia because Felicia was always around the world following her mother. Felicia finally gets into school the same year as Matthew – and she finds herself isolated from her peers because of her connection to Lavinia. She loathes how Lavinia behaves but isn’t strong enough to stands up against her, which makes other people think she approves of Lavinia’s actions. (Moreover, they were already ill-disposed towards her as they thought Lavinia’s twin sister couldn’t be any better.)

- Lavinia eventually starts working through her trauma and insecurities as Matthew and Felicia start criticizing her behaviour. She does get the Bee miraculous – but she also goes through a positive growth. She never completely sheds her caustic and sarcastic exterior, but she does end up behaving a lot better.

- Natalya also starts loosening up after being touched not only by Matthew but also by Michelle’s, Amelia’s, and Carlos’s kindness/welcoming demeanour. She despises them at first, but after a bit, she starts becoming fond of them and appreciating them. In the end, she loses a bit of her pessimistic view on relationships and becomes their friend as well.

- Over the course of the school year, Matthew starts hanging around Michelle’s house and Francis basically adopts him because he can see the kid’s in desperate need of some human warmth and affection. Also, Francis builds a very negative picture of Arthur in his head based on Matthew’s defeated demeanour. And he doesn’t hold his tongue in the few cases he meets Arthur in person, managing to get under Arthur’s skin better than mostly everybody else (Matthew’s upbringing is a very delicate topic for Arthur – partly because it almost feels like somebody’s criticizing Marianne’s actions, and partly because he has no idea of how to do it. And he doesn’t like it at all). They loathe each other for some time.

- On the other hand, once Michelle becomes more comfortable around Matthew, she’s invited to some photoshoots (since she’s interested in fashion) and then she gets noticed by Arthur, who, in spite of not being a designer himself, has been around enough of them to recognize her talent. Besides, he doesn’t disapprove of her personality so he lets her hang around their house and Matthew and even personally interacts with her a few times. Michelle ends up forming the opinion (not completely wrong) that Arthur isn’t actually a bad father – he cares a lot for Matthew, but he’s out of his depths and doesn’t know how to express it.

- The ‘Final Boss’ – the one behind everything – is actually Marianne, not Arthur. Marianne was a talented fashion designer who dreamed of fame and power, and once she met Arthur – who came from a rich family and had the financial ability to realize her dream, but was very frail and in dire need of some affection – she manipulated him into falling in love with her and used his financial assets to establish her company. She was genuinely fond of Arthur, in part – but it was secondary to her goals. And even once she got rich and famous, she wasn’t satisfied. She came across some legends about the Miraculous and decided to investigate into the matter. She eventually came into possession of the Peacock and Butterfly ones and tried using them for her own gains. Her greed was so strong that she didn’t stop even after she realized the damaged Peacock was draining her health, but kept pushing herself until she fell into a coma. And Arthur, who had just lost his anchor and emotional stability (Marianne was very careful that Arthur, instead of developing healthy relationships and healing from his childhood, would remain completely dependent on her) decided to do everything to bring her back. And that’s how Hawkmoth was born.

- Arthur doesn’t enjoy fighting two children (Ladybug and Chat Noir) nor hurting people (that’s also why he never uses real traumas to create akumas but only mundane annoyances), but he thinks he doesn’t have any other option if he wants to bring back Marianne. Moreover, he’s fully aware that Ladybug’s powers always fix everything, which helps convince him that, given his goal, his actions are justified.

- Marianne was actually a very poor mother for Matthew, too. He has good memories of her, but only because that’s all he knows. She isolated him and was possessive, overbearing, and constantly resorted to emotional manipulation – she was happy and affectionated as long as Matthew behaved exactly the way she wanted,  but the moment he would stray even of an inch, she would act overdramatic and disappointed, making him feel awful. Essentially, she destroyed Matthew’s self-esteem. (And Arthur didn’t notice because he, instead, had grown up with distant and more openly abusive parents. So, he thought that as long as Marianne was affectionate, she was a good mother. Moreover, he didn’t witness how capricious she was or how she would guilt-trip Matthew because she would only behave like that when Arthur wasn’t around.) Marianne did care deeply for Matthew, in her own way, but she was just a horrible person. She treated him as an extension of herself and her property instead of his own person.

- Eventually, Arthur does get the Cat and Ladybug miraculouses – even if Matthew and Michelle escape and he doesn’t see their identities (nor do Matthew and Michelle discover who they are – because they had sworn they wouldn’t. So, they walk side-to-side as they try to plan what to do and don’t look.) Arthur wishes Marianne back, fully intentioned to return the Cat and Ladybug miraculouses to their rightful owners afterwards.

...But Marianne comes back and not only Arthur doesn’t die – there’s something wrong with Marianne. She wants to keep the Cat and Ladybug miraculouses (which Arthur and Sakura wrestle away from her and manage to give back, but barely), she’s undeniably hungry for power. Arthur starts thinking that something went wrong with the wish, but he loves Marianne too much to go against her. He – along with Sakura – instead pretends to be on her side while at the same time trying to help Ladybug and Chat Noir fight against her and trying to find a cure to fix her. (It’s a long time before Arthur realizes that that was Marianne all along – she doesn’t need fixing because she has always been like that, she only became more unhinged and less subtle after recovering.)

- One of the turning points in Arthur’s realization is seeing how Marianne treats Matthew. Arthur had granted him many liberties, and while he was sceptical at first, (also thanks to Sakura’s insight) he eventually had to admit that Matthew thrived in the company of his peers. Maybe the dangers are higher (Arthur’s overprotective, and what happened to Marianne doesn’t help) but they’re outweighed by how much happier Matthew is. But Marianne wants to take everything back, and she doesn’t hold back any punches. (When Matthew wants to spend time with his friends, she complains that he doesn’t love her anymore, acts all heartbroken because he isn’t truly happy she’s back – if he were, he would spend all his time with her, wouldn’t he? – says he doesn’t respect her opinion anymore when he wants to go back to school, etc.) Matthew is a wreck, he’s torn and he doesn’t know what to do or what to think anymore. (He is happy that is mother’s back, yet, he can’t help but realize that he was happier before, when he could spend time with his friends and go to school, which leaves him feeling horribly guilty and selfish.) He stops smiling, can’t sleep, stops eating when not prompted... he becomes a ghost of himself. He looks even worse than Arthur did when he was still living with his parents. And that’s when Arthur comes to the realization it’s just wrong. He still doesn’t want to blame everything on Marianne (he tries to convince himself her instability is due to her prolonged coma and she’ll get better) but he starts pulling his weight and argue with her to defend Matthew’s freedom. He even gets to swallowing his pride and revealing the situation to Francis in order to make sure Matthew has a safe place he can stay at when his mother goes overboard (and that’s how a tentative friendship starts forming between Arthur and Francis).

- This isn’t all there is about Matthew, though. Arthur thinks the wish comes without a price, in the end (or maybe, that the price is Marianne’s sanity, for how much he doesn’t like to admit it). But Arthur doesn’t see Matthew collapse in a faint just after the wish is granted. Matthew wakes up not long later and resumes fighting as if nothing’s wrong – and even if he’s very exhausted afterwards, he thinks nothing of it. But over the following weeks, he starts feeling worse and worse. It’s small, at first – just lingering exhaustion and weakness. But it never gets better, developing instead in more and more frequent dizzy spells. It’s particularly bad after he transforms – he starts passing out once it’s over. He now gets sick very easily, too. If he has to hold the transformation for a bit longer than usual, he gets flu-like symptoms afterwards – it eventually gets to the point he’s too sick and weak to leave the bed for days. His miraculous isn’t damaged, but the price of the wish is paid with Matthew developing the same illness that affected his mother.

- Once Arthur realizes this, all the pretences are dropped. He realizes the person Marianne is and lets her go, focusing instead on trying to find a cure for Matthew and defeat Marianne alongside Ladybug and Chat Noir (whom he doesn’t know is Matthew, yet, but he does realize it after Chat Noir displays symptoms too similar to Matthew’s. It really doesn’t help with how guilty Arthur’s feeling). (Sakura keeps staying by Arthur’s side, too, and Arthur eventually admits he reciprocates her feelings.)

...

And that’s it. This was long. 😅 I don’t know how much of it makes sense but... I just couldn’t help thinking about this as I walking home tonight.

#hetalia #aph seychelles #aph canada #aph england #aph america #nyo america #aph france #nyo france #aph japan #nyo japan #aph belarus #aph italy #nyo italy #aph romano #nyo romano #aph cuba #aph russia #feyna speaks #fic idea #miraculous ladybug au

[erinelezabeth920]

Love In The Time Of

What seems like ages ago I started this blog. I think I had just graduated college. I wrote a piece called, “Love in the Time Of,” in which I tried to encapsulate (I’m sure poorly), the feeling of being out of college, floating through life and anxieties untethered. 

That seems small now, but the title still seems to fit. So when I decided I wanted to get back into writing (I’m sure I could say for noble purposes to give people uplifting words during this time of crisis etc etc., but really because I’m bored and other people are bored so the chances you’ll read my writing are just statistically higher), the title seemed to fit. In the time of... In the time of what? Pandemic? Disease? Quarantine? Being in small spaces with your loved ones? Being far away from your loved ones? Uncertaintly? Beauty? Eating a lot of popcorn? The list goes on.  The truth is, there’s a lot happening and there’s also very little. So it seemed like a good time to excersie writing the details. The day in and day outs that always get left out because grand adventures are much easier to write about. But what makes me special, sets me apart from the rest? Answer: nothing. For example, it’s much harder to write that today my alarm went off at 7:30am (well really it went off at 6:45 but I snoozed it for 45 minutes.) I got up in a little bit of a panic and pulled on some leggings. The sun was out. I started the hot water heater upper thing, filled my water bottle I knew I wouldn’t drink, pet my cat who was up half the night, and woke up my boyfriend who didn’t want to wake up because the cat was up half the night. I pulled out my laptop and unrolled my yoga mat. I checked my watch- 7:40. Text from my mom- Not going to make yoga this morning. SUN (all caps) is out. Going on a walk. Power to you mom. Sent back sun emoji. Started Zoom meeting. Drank tea. A couple people trickled on. Led my meditation session followed by a 20 minute yoga session while my cat ran around and my boyfriend made coffee. The sun was in my face. I talked about Princess Dairies the movie, and how Jonathan Van Ness on the Queer Eye episode I watched the other day led similar yoga poses I did and said the same thing at the end of his session; “The light in me sees and recognizes the light in you.”  Its harder to write that when I closed my computer I felt kind of empty. I got some coffee. Made some oatmeal. Hugged Andy because he needed a hug- touch affirmation is his love language. Listened to the radio station, John in the morning. I worry about him in the booth all alone. He played Tom Petty’s “Wild Flowers” and Queen’s “Under Pressure.” It felt fitting. He is such a good DJ, so I posted a picture of my Morning Show mug on instagram, so he would see it but also the rest of the world to know I’m okay? Cool? Interesting? I can’t even tell my motivations any more.

I sat outside on my tiny porch that overlooks a Safeway roof. I sat in the sun and pretended I was on Spring Break (this week is Spring Break for public schools, say what you will). I listened to more music. I played guitar kind of poorly and wondered if the guys at the Safeway loading dock could hear me (Monday is a delivery day). I wondered if they could, would they be inspired or annoyed. I chose to think inspired. I tried to play “New Slang” by the Shins but couldn’t find the key to sing in.   It’s harder to write that instead of some big adventure, I did a home workout with Andy. Squats are hard and relationships are not shiny. I took a bath. I read some essays by a non-fiction author about needing her own space as a middle -aged woman and mother. I wonder how she is doing now? I face-timed my mom. I had a Zoom dance party with my cousins. I made a salad and listened to the ‘Daily’ podcast about unemployment. I wondered if it was good spring break vibes to keep up with the news, but it also somehow makes me feel less alone. 

I organized under the bathroom sink. I put all the soaps in a little bag leftover from a Christmas gift exhange. That made me feel good for some reason.  It’s hard to write that I am sitting on the couch. No metaphors, no big meanings, words of wisdom. Just sitting. Andy is playing video games with his brother in California. My instinct is to be annoyed, but I know it’s important. Soon I’ll go on a walk, but maybe I’ll just take a nap and feel guilty. And maybe after that we’ll watch more Star Wars. I think we’re at the movie with the Yoda puppet. Thank goodness we got more popcorn kernels. I can hear the cars below driving into the Safeway parking lot. I wonder if they’re scared to be there, if they’re all wearing masks. My laundy has stopped. I can hear the cat’s water filter, like a softly flowing stream in the distance.  And that, I suppose, is love in the time of.  

#writing #quarantine #non-fiction #mental health

[katwriting]

Fic: Sound of your Heart

celebrity AU // chapter 3

In which Alec suffers, and Magnus has a ball about it. Oh, and there’s a first date too. 

word count: 5.4k (13.1k total) // Read on AO3 (or continue reading below)

Magnus was woken by the persistent beeping of his alarm, and the sound of raindrops splattering against his window. Groaning, he rolled over onto his back and threw an arm across his eyes. It was far too early for the world to require him being a functioning member of society.  

He was just about to drift off to sleep, when there was the familiar sound of rustling blankets. Magnus felt the mattress dip and a warm body settle next to his own – followed by the sharp sting of claws digging into his stomach.

Magnus' eyes shot open as he yelped in pain. "Chairman! I told you to stop doing that!"

He grabbed Chairman and carefully set him down next to him on the duvet, trying to send him his strictest glare. When Chairman just huffed and curled up next to him, Magnus shrugged and snuggled into his cat's silky gray fur. He would be a strict cat dad some other time.  

Instead of scolding his cat, Magnus dared to throw another glance out the bedroom window. The clouds were a depressing gray and didn't seem like clearing up anytime soon.

Magnus ran his fingers through Chairman's fur. "You don't feel like getting out of the house, do you?"

The cat's purrs only grew louder.

Magnus sighed again and pulled the Chairman closer to his chest. "Me neither, dear."

They stayed like that for a little while, Magnus burrowed in his pillows and duvet, the Chairman snuggled up against his chest. Awful weather aside, Magnus felt at peace. It had been a few weeks since the end of his tour and aside from writing songs and meeting with his team here and there, life had been surprisingly quiet. Magnus had adored being on tour – playing at a different city every night, soaking up the excitement from the audience, listening to them his songs – but he never felt as much at peace as in his own Brooklyn apartment on a rainy day. He didn't like rain, actually he resented it, but there was just something about enjoying a day in while the rest of New York had to face the floods that put Magnus at ease.

He was just about to doze off again when the comfortable silence in his bedroom was interrupted by his phone beeping. Grumbling something unrecognizable, he reached over and grabbed it, hissing when the bright screen hurt his eyes. It was just far too early for people to expect him to be a functioning member of society yet.

However, when he checked the name and message that had come in, his mood brightened and he quickly opened the message.

Got almost run over by a bike this morning and by the time I was at work my clothes were drenched. I hate rainy days.

Magnus chuckled, starting to type out a reply. He was pretty sure it would earn him a very snarky reply, but it was worth the trouble.

About ten days had passed since Magnus had run into Alec at the coffee shop again and they had exchanged numbers. For his initial text to Alec, Magnus had gone all out – and regretted it the second he had hit sent. But thankfully Alec's humor wasn't limited to conversations happening in person and he had replied with just the same amount of wit, and the same sarcasm that had intrigued Magnus about him in the first place. They had been texting back and forth since then, and talking to Alec had become an unexpected, but not at all unpleasant, new part of Magnus' daily life.

They didn't talk every day, but sent each other messages here and there. In doing so, Magnus had learned a lot about Alec. Not just that his sister's wedding drove him crazy or that he was dangerously close to killing Aldertree from finance on sight the next time he saw him. But also what kind of music he was currently listening to or that he'd had an aversion to peanut butter for as long as he could remember. Magnus now knew that Alec didn't quite get the hype around Marvel movies or superheroes in general. He'd practiced archery as a kid, had even won a few competitions. But thanks to his job and just life in general getting the best of him, he had not been to an archery range in quite some time.

And most importantly,  he absolutely, entirely, with every fibre of his being despised rainy days.

It's like the universe is planning for me to have a shitty day and wants me to KNOW it does.

Magnus could almost hear Alec grumble the words while he was probably sitting in his office, clad in a semi-dry suit and loaded with misery.

Don't be dramatic. It's not that bad.

No. It's worse.

Magnus chuckled, then dropped his phone onto the mattress to look at his cat, who had left his position curled up next to Magnus to pad over to the other side of the bed where he could look out of the window. Chairman didn't look like he approved of the rain either – he almost looked like he was frowning.

Still grinning, Magnus grabbed his phone, snapped a picture and sent it to Alec.

I think you have an ally in your aversion against rainy days, Alexander.

Alec's reply took mere seconds.

FINALLY someone who understands me. Also, nobody calls me Alexander.                                                                                                                                    

You better get used to it, then.

With a soft laugh, he put his phone onto his nightstand, then stretched one more time before pushing the covers off his body and getting out of bed.

+++

"All I'm saying is that this could be a really nice opportunity for you to get back into the game after your break."

"And all I'm saying is that I'll think about it. That's all I can promise at the moment."

Sighing, Magnus grabbed his coffee and took a sip. He peered over the rim of his mug at Ragnor, who was sitting on a chair next to him and going through a folder that seemed to be about to burst.

"You know you could just use a computer, right? It would make the whole searching for that thing you scribbled onto a post it note you borrowed from an assistant and left somewhere in a conference room three floors upstairs a week ago thing a little easier," Magnus quipped, his lips already pulling into a smile. Ragnor was very much responsible for Magnus' success, but he was also a dear friend and just so easy to tease.

But before Ragnor could come up with an undoubtedly sarcastic reply, the glass door to his office opened and Catarina walked in, carrying a large cardboard box.

Taking in Magnus' smirk and her husband's exasperated features, she frowned. "What did I miss?"

"We're sending Magnus back to that lousy coffee shop he used to work at if he keeps getting on my nerves any longer," Ragnor grumbled, barely looking up from his notes.

Anybody else would have been intimidated by his behavior, but Magnus wasn't fooled. He had long accepted that Ragnor was just a natural grump and comments like that weren't to be taken seriously. Except if he was really pissed, but since Magnus' career had taken off, the number of times that Ragnor was genuinely angry at Magnus had declined significantly. Mostly because Magnus had actually started to listen to him. From time to time. When the mood struck.

Luckily Magnus knew that Ragnor would never take his antics personally. He had been an important mentor for Magnus since day one (and would not miss a single chance to tease him about that), but they both knew that underneath all their bickering lay a deep mutual respect and understanding for each other. It was part of what had made their both their working relationship and their friendship so strong since the beginning. The same applied to Catarina, even though Magnus and Ragnor's tendency to roast each other had tested her nerves in the past more often than not.

Almost as if she had heard Magnus' thoughts, Catarina took another stern look at them and let out a sigh. She took a seat next to Magnus on the couch and reached for his hand, her thumb mindlessly grazing over his skin as she took in Ragnor's discontent and Magnus' cheeky smirk.

"Magnus", she said, her voice infinitely kind and just a tiny bit scolding, "what did you do now?"

Magnus huffed out a laugh. "I didn't do anything. I just told your dear husband that I'm not really in the mood for a TV show appearance right now."

"More like that you're not in the mood for any TV shows anytime soon."

"It's not like I'm supposed to do any TV shows anytime soon," Magnus shot back. "A three months break from the public eye. That's what we agreed on."

Ragnor just opened his mouth to reply when Catarina cut in. "It is. And you're getting that time off, don't worry. But three months away from the public eye doesn't mean three months off work." She nodded towards the cardboard box she had brought with her. "Your new autograph photos came in and there's a lot of new fan mail too. Time to get to work, love."

Magnus flashed a smile at Ragnor. "I'm so sorry, dear friend, I believe we'll have to postpone this conversation. Not that I mind."

He then turned back towards Catarina. "Do you need me to start signing now?"

She shook her head. "Just make sure they are ready by the end of the week."

Magnus nodded. "Consider it done."

Signing some of the new autograph cards took a few hours that Magnus spent tucked away in a quiet meeting room in the Downworld Records headquarters. He managed to get a few hundred done and would have been faster if his friends weren't so terribly chatty. Catarina stopped by with coffee sometime in the afternoon, Elias from the reception desk paid him a visit and even Ragnor came to say hi at some point. Even Alec kept Magnus company, only through texts, but still.

Magnus kept signing until well into the afternoon, when his eyes were sore and his writs hurt. When he'd reached the point where he couldn't stand to look at his own face anymore, he decided to call it a day. He put the signed autograph cards back into the cardboard box, took the fan letters with him and made his way to the ground floor.

+++

Back at his apartment, Magnus fixed himself a glass of wine before sitting down on his living room carpet and taking out the letters Catarina had given to him. Reading fanmail was something he had always preferred to do in the privacy of his apartment. There was just something about these letters people sent him, something so personal that Magnus felt like taking his time was the only way to treat them right. He didn't read everything, of course. There was just too much coming in. But he tried. Lots of them were about how people felt inspired by Magnus, how he had inspired them to go after their dreams. Those always hit close to home, especially since it hadn't been so long ago that Magnus had been a struggling singer with a big dream himself. The least he could do, he felt, was give those people's words at least a fraction of the time and attention they had put into writing them.

A little while into reading the letters, Chairman joined Magnus in the living room and with his cat resting in his lap and his fans' moving stories to go through, the rest of the afternoon flew by. Magnus didn't even notice how much time had passed until, once again, the persistent ringtone of his phone drew him out of a particularly inspiring letter.

Without looking, he picked up, too busy with swallowing past the lump in his throat that the fans' story had left behind to check the caller ID. "Hello?", he said, voice slightly pressed. Emotional letters always got him.

"I swear to everything that is holy, I will kill Aldertree and not even try to make it look like an accident."

Magnus chuckled. "Hello to you too, Alexander."

"Oh, sorry. Yeah. Hi." Magnus heard some traffic noise in the background, and Alec cursing under his breath. "Anyway, I'm going to kill him."

Putting the letter aside, Magnus shooed the Chairman of his lap so he could sit up a little. "And why is that?"

"As if I would need a specific reason at this point," Alec scoffed before there was loud honking in the background and Magnus could hear him curse again, louder this time. "Great, now I stepped into a puddle too. I just got this suit dry cleaned, dammit! "

"Today is really not your day, huh?" Magnus said sympathetically, then took another sip of his wine.

Alec let out a sigh. "Yeah. You could say that."

"So. Aldertree?"

"I don't even know why I get angry about him at this point anymore. He's been sabotaging my work ever since I got promoted. I just try to ignore him most of the time, but he manages to get on my nerves every damn time. I just can't stand him, yet I can't do anything about it since I'm not running the company yet and he knows it. It's just so…frustrating."

A wave of sympathy rolled through Magnus. Before his career had taken off, and even now that he was where he always wanted to be, he'd had to deal with plenty of people who fit to that description. At least until he had learned which people were here to stay and which ones were only around as long as his fame was.

"Look, Alexander-"

Alec didn't let him finish. Or even properly start, for that matter. "You know what's fun?"

"I assume you're going to tell me in a second."

"Ha. Well, yeah.  Uh…what's fun is that I didn't even call you because of Aldertree, yet ended up ranting to you about him anyways."

Magnus huffed out a laugh. "I don't blame you. Awful people do tend to have that effect on us. Besides, I enjoy talking to you."

"Yeah, me too. The talking, I mean. I uh…I like that, too. That was kind of the point why I called in the first place."

"To talk to me?"

"No. Well, yeah, but also because I wanted to ask something."

Magnus chuckled. "I'm all ears."

"Look…I really enjoyed texting with you these past two weeks or so and I was kind of wondering if we uh…could hang out for real at some point?"

"Hang out? May I remind you, Alexander, that I don't just hang out with people." He swirled the wine in his glass. "But if this is your adorably dorky way of asking me out, please, go ahead."

Alec let out a slightly nervous laugh. "Yeah. That's kind of it. So, will you?"

"Will I what?"

"Stop being a tease, mostly. Also, go out on date with me?"

Magnus smiled and nodded, then remembered that Alec wouldn't exactly be able to hear that reaction. "I'd love to."

"Yeah?" Alec sounded genuinely surprised, like he hadn't expected Magnus' answer. "I mean, great! How does this Friday sound?"

Magnus smiled. "Friday sounds great. See you then?"

The relief in Alec's tone was impossible to miss. Magnus felt his heartbeat quicken at the realization. "Yeah. I'll see you then."

"Great! And Alexander?"

"Yeah?"

"Do me a favor and try not to kill Aldertree until then. I'm all for handcuffs, but I'd hate for our first date to be in prison."

Alec's gleeful laugh rung in Magnus' ears long after they had ended their call.

+++

"Magnus, hey!"

Looking up from his phone, Magnus turned around just to see Alec rushing towards him. "I'm sorry I'm late," Alec huffed, slightly out of breath and cheeks a little flushed. "I got held up at work by you know who and then came here as fast as I could."

Magnus smiled reassuringly, noting with a pleased feeling that Alec's gaze was raking up and down his attire. So the necklaces and open buttons had been a good idea after all.

"No problem, I just got here myself," he said, turning around towards the building that had definitely seen better days, but otherwise didn't give anything away about what awaited them behind the door. "So, Alexander. What exactly are we doing here?"

Alec grinned. "Let me guess – you googled the place, came up with nothing and it's been bugging you all week. Am I right?"

Magnus pursed his lips and raised a hand to scratch at the back of his neck. "I may or may not have been a little curious. Now, are you just going to keep making fun of me or are you actually going to tell me what we're doing tonight?"

Alec chuckled. "Impatient as always, I see." The chuckle turned into a full-blown laugh when Magnus just raised his eyebrows at him.

"Fine, let's stop keeping you in the dark. I actually didn't know this place existed until my sister told me about it about a week ago, and it's a bit of a long story, so why don't you just see for yourself?"

To Magnus' (not at all unpleasant) surprise, Alec underlined those words by gently putting a hand on Magnus' back and nudging him towards the entrance. And if Alec's hand rested there for just a little longer than strictly necessary, Magnus wasn't one to complain.

Magnus had gotten to know Alec a little better through their continuous texting over the past couple of days, and it didn't take even half an hour into their date for him to learn another three new things about him: He had a mediocre taste in style, a great taste in music and an excellent taste when it came to picking locations for a first date.

The initially dull looking building had turned out to be a cozy little art gallery that focused on all kinds of weird exhibits. Currently, they were showing an exhibit about the absolute worst the 80s and 90s had to offer in terms of music – also known as Magnus' secret guilty pleasure kind of era.

"I have to admit, Alexander, you do know how to pick an unexpected first date location," Magnus mused as he slowly walked through the exhibits' Pop and Rock of the 90s section after strolling through other sections for a while.

Alec, who had been doing a very poor job at hiding the fact that he'd been a little nervous about what Magnus might say about his first date idea, visibly relaxed. "You like it, then?"

Magnus beamed. "An exhibit about all the awful 90s music you will never hear me admit out loud I still love? I love this.

"Good, that makes one of us. Because I'm starting to wonder what on earth you find so fascinating about the 80s."

They had made it into a part of the exhibit where visitors got to witness some of the best of the 80s and 90s on their own. All they had to do was put on a pair of headphones and choose a song on one of the tablets that were mounted to the wall.

Magnus, who had already been busy picking up a pair of headphones, halted. He raised an eyebrow  at Alec. "I'll have you know that the 80s included musical legends such as Queen, Bon Jovi or Whitney Houston, Alexander."

"Yeah, I know that," Alec deadpanned, his tone being nowhere near serious. "I'm talking about the Cyndi Lauper and Wham! songs in here." He sounded like mentioning those artists alone personally offended him.

Magnus shrugged. "Collateral damage. There are so many better pieces to pick from. May I?", he asked, holding up the pair of headphones to Alec.

When Alec nodded, he slipped them over his ears and grabbed another pair for himself. Once they were both all set, Magnus turned towards the vast music selection and picked a song for the both of them.

As soon as the song started playing, Magnus couldn't help himself. He closed his eyes just as his body almost automatically started moving in tune with the music. Magnus had always had a hard time just sitting still when listening to a good song, especially when it was one of his personal favorites.

He kept going until a gentle tap on his shoulder dragged him out of the last bit of the song, just as the singer's voice started to fade off. When he opened his eyes, he realized that Alec had been watching him, leaning against the wall, headphones long forgotten and a gentle smirk on his lips.

"Don't You Forget About Me? Really, Magnus?"

Magnus shrugged. "That is 80s music as well, Alec. Not so bad after all, is it?"

Alec chuckled. "You sure know how to sell it."

Alec reached out and pulled the headphones off Magnus' head, setting them back onto the hook where they'd taken them from. "So what other not-so guilty musical pleasures are you hiding?"

Magnus laughed. "My dear Alexander, that is a story for a second date."

It took them another while to finish their stroll through the gallery. Most of it was due to Magnus, who could talk about music for hours and sure made use of that trait during their date. But Alec didn't seem to mind, he patiently listened to Magnus' stories and threw in an anecdote of his own here and there, proving that it hadn't been just talk when he'd said he had a bit of an interest in music as well.

After they had made it to the end, Alec went to retrieve their coats and met Magnus in the entrance hall. "So? Did you like the exhibit?

Magnus beamed at him as he reached for his jacket, his fingers brushing against Alec's as he took it. "I told you already, I loved this. Your lack of appreciation for guilty pleasure music isn't going to change that."

Alec smiled back at him, and this time it reached his eyes, too. He looked…hopeful, Magnus thought. "Great. I was actually kind of nervous since you know, first date usually means drinks or a movie or whatever. But I figured since you mentioned you're into 80s and 90s music, this might be up your alley."

"Definitely. Thanks for bringing me here. However, now that you mention it," Magnus said, glancing at his watch, "drinks don't sound so bad right now."

Alec grinned. "I was hoping you would say that. Come on, I know a place."

Alec led them to a bar not far from the gallery. Thanks to it being a Friday night, The Hunter's Moon was packed, but they managed to secure themselves a small table tucked away in the corner. The place wasn't big, yet buzzing with energy and excitement, the latter being due to the stage about 30 feet away from Alec and Magnus' table. For now, it was empty, but a microphone and guitar seemed just to be waiting for someone to start playing.

When Magnus asked Alec about the empty stage, Alec just smirked and muttered something about patience. "But you'll like it, promise."

He ended up being right. Alec had just taken off towards the bar to get their first round of drinks when a young woman walked on stage, waved to the audience and started tuning the guitar. There was a moment of excited silence before she started playing a rendition of James Bay's "Hold Back The River", singing along in a soft voice that slowly grew more powerful as the song went on. Magnus was fascinated immediately, so much that he almost didn't notice Alec had gotten back from the bar, drinks in hand.

Alec chuckled as he pushed Magnus' drink into his direction, their fingers brushing together briefly. "I assume you like this place?"

The woman had reached the first chorus and while her voice had been soft and melodic, she switched gears to a much more powerful tone as the song went on.

"Are you kidding? I could listen to her all day", Magnus said and laughed. "I haven't been to an open mic night in forever, but I'm just realizing what I've been missing out on."

Alec nodded and smiled. "This is one of my favorite places. It's a bit of a commute from my apartment, but the music makes it all worth it. I admire these people, actually. It takes courage to just walk up onto that stage and sing your heart out, not knowing if people are going to like it or not."

"That it does", Magnus mused, before realizing the words had actually slipped out. "I mean, I can imagine that it does. These people must put their heart and soul into these performances," he added quickly, just as the woman on stage put all her energy into the final few lines of the song.

Surveying Alec's expression carefully, Magnus kept an eye out for any signs that he had managed to blow his own cover. When Alec didn't show any signs of suspicion, Magnus breathed out and turned back towards the stage and grabbed his drink. Relieved, he raised his glass towards Alec. "Anyway. To us. Thanks for bringing me here, Alec."

Alec's gaze was warm when he looked at Magnus. "It's my absolute pleasure."

Magnus' martini clinked against Alec's beer bottle, and the sound made Magnus oddly hopeful. Things had been going well so far. Alec had been attentive and funny all night and there hadn't been a single moment of awkward silence. Even better – Magnus was having a genuinely good time.  He didn't quite trust the warm, comfortable feeling in his stomach just yet, but it seemed like they were ringing in a rather special kind of night.

And judging from Alec's soft smile and the warm expression in his eyes whenever he caught Magnus looking at him, Magnus wasn't the only one feeling that way.

+++

"…and that's why I am pretty sure that next time I go to Peru, the people at airport security won't be as tolerant as they were last time."

Magnus finished his little story with a smirk and a flourish and his free hand. The other one had been tucked into Alec's for the past couple of minutes. Alec had grabbed it to pull Magnus aside and out of the way of an approaching group of pedestrians. He hadn't made any attempts at letting go since, and Magnus was going to be damned if he was going to make him do so.

Magnus almost found it odd how well Alec and him got along even though it was only their first date. But then again, he couldn't bring himself to care.  Their evening had gone way too well for that. Throughout the night, Magnus had realized that all the funny texts and spontaneous phone calls in the world didn't even come close to spending time with Alec in person. Magnus had had a good feeling with Alec since they had first run into each other at the coffee shop, but the longer the evening went on, the more Magnus realized that his gut feeling about Alec had been right.

Talking to Alec, laughing with him, was easy, effortless. Alec's gaze was warm, his laugh contagious. He was still a lot more on the quiet side than Magnus, but the longer their date had gone on the more Alec had opened up. He'd stood a little closer, let his gaze rest on Magnus a little longer, nudged him here and there to underline his point while telling a story, or gently brushed his fingers against Magnus' as he reached for his drink. They had been small gestures, easy to miss, but Magnus had noticed anyway.

His own skeptical mind had blamed it on the cozy bar and the music in the background at first, but even now as they were strolling through the streets, Magnus felt as comfortable with Alec as he had been the entire night. That feeling had only grown stronger when Magnus' weird story from Peru, sometimes a bit of a dealbreaker on any first date, had made Alec only laugh with no signs of him being weirded out.

"You got yourself banned from an entire country. Why am I not surprised."

"What can I say, Alexander – I am a man of many talents."

He took another few steps on the sidewalk, then almost tripped over his own feet while trying to dodge a lamppost. It was only thanks to Alec's quick thinking and even quicker reflexes that Magnus didn't end up falling flat on his butt in the middle of the street.

Alec chuckled. "I suppose almost breaking your nose because you walked into a lamppost is one of those?"

"Fine, it wasn't one of my best moments."

"It's okay. It was actually pretty adorable."

"Adorable, huh?"

"Yeah," Alec mumbled, his hand brushing against Magnus' once again.

This time, Magnus didn’t think twice. In one swift move, he closed his own hand around Alec's, holding it in a light grasp, just tight enough to feel connected but still light enough for Alec to pull away if he so desired.

There was a pause, a beat of silence. Magnus breathed in, was about to pull his hand back, when the grip of Alec's hand suddenly tightened and he interlaced their fingers.

Magnus breathed out, his shoulders relaxing. He looked over to Alec, and caught him looking right back.

As their eyes caught, Alec's gaze drifted to their interlaced fingers and Magnus saw a smirk pulling at his lips. Alec bit his lip, then looked back up at Magnus. "Okay?"

Magnus let out a soft laugh, just barely audible, barely more than a breath. He returned Alec's smirk, his gaze reassuring. "Absolutely."

They kept walking for another while, for longer than it would have been strictly necessary to get to the next subway stop. Some of the time they spent talking, but most of it in comfortable silence. Magnus didn't mind either – he was more than okay with their little detours, as they meant he didn't have to say goodbye to Alec just yet.

Eventually though, they made it to the subway stop and came to a halt, turning towards each other. Magnus felt an odd sense of déjà-vu, similar to the last time they had seen each other and had been forced to say goodbye too early.

Judging from Alec's smirk, he'd had the same thought. "I guess this is where we part ways, again?"

Magnus chuckled. "I guess so."

Alec reached out for his other hand, his fingers softly grazing over Magnus' skin. "I had a really good time tonight."

Magnus squeezed Alec's hand gently. "So did I. Care for a second date sometime soon?"

Alec's gaze was as warm as the smiles he'd sent Magnus throughout the evening. "I'd love that."

Magnus beamed at Alec. He had just a couple of minutes left until he needed to catch his train, but he just couldn't bring himself to head off just now. The night had been too special. Instead, he stepped closer to Alec, closing almost all of the distance between them.

"Alright, Alexander," he muttered, voice barely above a whisper. "I'll see you soon then."

He took another half step closer and felt Alec's breath brush against his face. Pausing one more second, he waited if Alec would pull away. But just like earlier, when he had reached out for his hand, Alec didn't. So Magnus took one more half step to close the distance between them and dropped a kiss on the corner of Alec's mouth – just shy of his lips.

Squeezing his hands one more time, Magnus slowly backed away. He was just about to turn towards the subway station and head home when Alec's voice made him turn around once again.

"Magnus?"

"Yeah?"

"You call that a goodbye kiss?"

A sly smirk pulled on Magnus' lips, matching the one on Alec's face. "My, my Alexander. How brazen you are," Magnus mumbled. He stepped closer to Alec again and rested one hand on Alec's waist, the other on his face before leaning in again – for a proper kiss this time.

#malec #malec fic #malec fanfiction #magnus bane #alec lightwood #celebrity au #katwriting

[chiseler]

THE DARK SIDE OF ROBERT WISE

When it comes to lists of great American directors, Robert Wise far too often swoops below the radar. Like Billy Wilder, he made films in nearly every conceivable genre, from horror and science fiction to romantic comedies, Westerns, wartime dramas, lavish musicals, even a big budget disaster movie. Also like Wilder, he provided most of those genres with not only hugely popular, but iconic entries (The Day the Earth Stood Still, The Haunting, The Sound of Music, etc.). But unlike Wilder, he never pandered to his audience, and in most instances shied away from hammering them over the head with messages. The problem is, with rare exception nobody ever seems to remember that Wise was the one who directed these films. Part of that may be because, as the general consensus has it, he had no signature style or trademark visual flourishes. Even after working as an editor on Citizen Kane and an uncredited second unit director on The Magnificent Ambersons, his own films would never be confused with Welles’. He was a storyteller, first and foremost, and one of the best to come out of the major Hollywood studios. He was also, in his own quiet way, far more radical and influential than most viewers realize.

When it comes to notable noir directors, Wise is rarely if ever considered among the likes of Raoul Walsh, Edward Dmytryk, Joseph Lewis, Joseph Losey, Delmer Daves, even Welles, Fritz Lang or  John Huston. But over a career that spanned some sixty years, roughly one-fifth of the forty movies he directed could be considered noir films, far more than any other single genre in which he dabbled.  

Wise got his start in the late ’30s as an editor at RKO, where he worked with Welles on Kane and Ambersons before teaming with producer Val Lewton. In 1944, he co-directed Curse of the Cat People, the almost completely unrelated sequel to the dark and atmospheric 1942 original. About a week after production began on Lewton’s The Body Snatcher the following year, he brought Wise in again to take over the directing duties. It would be Wise’ first solo directing credit, and though he later admitted to being quite nervous about getting tossed into an uncomfortable position as replacement director, the solid confidence of the storytelling, the sharp editing, and even the performances he got would become hallmarks of his work down the line. It’s interesting to note, at the very moment Wise was learning his craft, the influence German Expressionism would have not only on Welles and Lewton, but  both the American horror films of the ’30s and ’40s as well as the crime dramas that would begin to emerge after WWII. It’s also interesting to note that The Body Snatcher itself danced the line between horror and noir. Although marketed at the time and remembered today as a horror film (it co-starred Boris Karloff and Bela Lugosi after all, and had a shocker of an ending), in retrospect the film, loosely based on the Burke and Hare case, really plays in many ways more like a period noir film about murder, betrayal, blackmail, shadowy pasts and a sinister underground operation than a standard horror movie of the era. All the monsters here are human, and an innocent young medical student gets dragged unwittingly into some mighty sordid goings-on.

While other proto-noir films like, say, Stranger on the Third Floor had been released prior to this, it’s worth noting, unheralded as he remains, Wise’s position at that very horror/noir crux.

Although the public tends to reflexively think of Warner Brothers when it comes to noir pictures, they were much slicker, much brighter, and tended to have much larger budgets and more star power than the post-war crime dramas coming out of Columbia, Paramount, or especially RKO. Because RKO was smaller, with smaller budgets, fewer big contract stars and name directors, they actually released more noir films than Warners, as crime films could be churned out quickly and cheaply, and didn’t need lavish sets or big production crews. The crime films coming out of RKO were leaner, tougher, and because they remained under the radar, could get away with a lot more.

In 1946, a year after The Body Snatcher, Wise would direct his first straight crime film, Criminal Court, with Tom Conway, Robert Armstrong, and Steve Brody. The reliable but unremarkable Conway plays a lawyer who is planning to run for district attorney. Everything’s fine and dandy until he accidentally kills a local gangster and tries to cover it up. The twist comes when we learn the gangster owned the nightclub where the lawyer’s girlfriend worked as a singer. Right when it looks like the lawyer’s gotten away with murder, the cops pin the murder on his girlfriend. It’s a fairly standard B crime melodrama. Despite the tutelage of both Welles and Lewton, Wise avoided most of what would later become the expected cliches of the noir formula, especially in terms of the camera work. Later in his life, he would denounce those directors who played around with the camera too much—using weird angles or moving the camera unnecessarily—saying such things called attention to the mechanics of filmmaking and took the audience out of the picture. True to form he concentrates on the script and editing to tell the story at hand, about a man who makes a mistake and quickly finds himself in way over his head.

In an odd way, it was with 1947’s Born to Kill—an A film for RKO designed to establish Lawrence Tierrney as a matinee idol—that Wise at once solidified what might be seen as his own style while at the same time distancing himself from the other, more recognized noir directors of the day.

The story, in a nutshell, concerns the torrid and doomed love affair between a psychotic serial killer (Tierney) and a ruthless sociopath (Claire Trevor). Looking back now, 1947 remains perhaps the most singularly golden year of the noir era, with the releases of Out of the Past, Lady from Shanghai, Pick-Up on South Street, Dead Reckoning, Dark Passage, Raw Deal, and so very many others. But a part from the story, the psychology, the characters and the actors (the cast also includes Elisha Cook, Esther Howard, Phillip Terry and Walter Slezak), Wise avoids all the standard conventions of noir stylistics. There are no self-conscious camera angles, deep focus, or lighting tricks. There are no voiceovers or flashbacks. There aren’t even any rain-slick streets to count on. It’s just a tale of terrible people doing terrible things and meeting terrible ends. And though based on an earlier novel, the brutality, cruelty and simple nihilism at play here, more than most other noir films of the time, presaged the second generation of more nihilistic hardboiled pulp writers who would begin to emerge in the 1950s. In fact even calling it a noir film, as such things have come to be understood, might be pushing it a bit, if what you’re looking for is set dressing. It exists as a radical departure from its contemporaries, and points up Wise as a man who could work comfortably in any genre, but in his own subtle and unique way, and by his own playbook.

Wise’s next film, ’49’s The Set-Up, was an even more radical departure from the norm. On the surface it’s just another boxing movie about an aging, broken down third-rate boxer named Stoker (Robert Ryan), who believes he’s always been just one punch away from a title shot. But unlike other boxing films from the time, like Champion or Body and Soul, there’s nothing Romantic about it. It doesn’t end with a big, glitzy championship match at Madison Square Garden and a rousing, victorious climax. All the action takes place in and around a small and dumpy arena in Paradise City, and Ryan’s redemptive moment doesn’t take the form of a title bout, but just one more low-rent match in a long string of low-rent matches.

There is definitely a story and drama at play here, but the film, including all the side characters, takes the form of an allegory about the endless struggle that is daily life for most people. Paradise City is where people end up when they’ve completely run out of luck. In fact the losers who populate the film are a little too dirty, a little too lost in what may be seen as a hyper-naturalistic way. Ryan’s Stoker Thompson is a man who’s doomed without knowing he’s doomed, and he’s doomed in one way or another whichever way he turns come the end of the film.

The truly radical move Wise made here, though, and it was almost unheard of at the time, was to let the film play out in real time. The picture opens at 9:05, and we follow everything that happens not only to Stoker, but to everyone he encounters over the next 72 minutes. There are no flashbacks, no cutaway asides, just a panorama of storylines that unravel over the course of a single evening in a dingy fight club in a two-bit town. Yet thanks to the script and the performances, we come to know and understand all these characters intimately. In another fairly radical move for the time, there is no musical score, save for the ringing of the bell, and whatever music may be playing at a nearby arcade or on the street, It’s a gorgeous masterpiece, brilliantly edited and loaded with telling images which feed the allegory (like a man playing a claw game), and ends with one of the most brutal and realistic fights ever to appear in a Hollywood film.

It would be Wise’s last film for RKO, and the last film he would edit himself. It would also be the last noirish picture he would make for nearly a decade. During that stretch between 1945 and 1949 he’d made a few other pictures—costume dramas, Westerns, even a remake of The Most Dangerous Game—but always returned to dark crime dramas. Beginning in 1950, as he started moving around the other major studios, it was almost as if he made a conscious decision to stay away from crime films, hopscotching from Westerns to comedies to romances to newspaper dramas to war films to the corporate boardroom skullduggery of Executive Suite and the groundbreaking (in so many ways) science fiction of The Day the Earth stood Still.

After scoring a major hit with the all-star submarine drama Run Silent, Run Deep, in 1958 Wise again returned to noir. By then noir was all but dead as a genre, so much so that I’d still argue Stanley Kubrick’s The Killing, released two years earlier, worked as both homage and satire on a form that had run its course. Maybe realizing this, or maybe simply approaching the material as he always had, Wise brought a number of subtle twists to I Want to Live!. For one, the script was based on a true story, or more specifically on a series of newspaper articles about (and letters written by) Barbara Graham, who was convicted of murder and sent to the gas chamber in California in June of 1955. Moreover, while the film makes it clear Graham (Susan Hayward) was the victim of a frame-up and wrongly convicted, mostly on account of her loose morals, unlike most such films that would find her exonerated in the last reel, Wise closes the film with her execution. Most telling of all,while there are a few flashy sequences here (I’m thinking in particular of Hayward surrendering to the cops), he mostly approaches the material as naturalistically as he had the world of low-rent boxing in The Set-Up. In that earlier case, and after a great deal of research, he laid bare just how ugly, sad, and brutal that world can be, and here he takes that clear-eyed view one step further, by actually bringing the camera into the gas chamber and laying bare the mechanics of state-sponsored execution in a way that had never been seen before. The fact that it’s presented in such a cold, clinical, documentary style, without a dramatic swell in the music or quick cuts to the shocked witnesses in the gallery leaves it that much more shocking and disturbing. Audiences unfamiliar with Graham’s story at the time were undoubtedly expecting her last-minute vindication, but they didn’t get it. Even accepting that, though, they would never have expected Wise to actually show the execution itself in that much detail, but, well, he did, and did so without calling attention to himself.

A year later in 1959 noir was even deeper in the grave, and Wise used his last crime film as a way of hearkening back over the genre’s history, but with a contemporary angle and some rare stylistic flashes that are anything but noirish. It’s at heart a simple and straightforward heist picture, with Dave Burke (Ed Begley) hiring two ex-cons to help him pull off the proverbial easy bank job that could net each of them a cool $50,000 in small bills. Both men are down on their luck, both are having domestic problems, and one’s in deep to a local bookie. There are distinct and deliberate nods to The Asphalt Jungle, The Killing, and about four dozen other films that preceded it. The contemporary twist here is that the one with the gambling problem is Harry Belafonte, and the other, Earle (Robert Ryan again, in the Sterling Hayden role) is an angry and unapologetic racist. When you get right down to it, actually, both Belafonte’s Johnny and Ryan’s Earle are deeply racist, though they express it in different ways. In any case, it throws a bit of a monkey wrench into any hopes things might run smoothly. And no, in proper noir fashion, things don’t end well for anyone.

What makes the film so memorable, considering we’ve seen it play out so many times before, are the script (Wise was always the first to note the importance of the script) and the performances down the line. Within and on top of the well-worn, even generic storyline, however, Wise allows himself to hold certain shots for an extraordinarily long time, while playing with ambient noise and prolonged silences in anything but a cliched manner. You can’t point at this, or any of his films, and say “this is clearly a Robert Wise film,” but you can still call them great films in which something subtly different is going on.

After Odds Against Tomorrow, Wise went on to make anything but crime films, starting with West Side Story. He made a few more sci-fi films (The Andromeda Strain, Star Trek: The Motion Picture), a couple more horror movies, some comedies, The Sound of Music, The Hindenburg, and lord knows what else. Over his long career he remained a chameleon who perfected a kind of anti-style style, seeing film as a medium in which to tell stories, not showboat.  Although deeply respected, ultimately, buy other directors who noted the confidence and control he had over the image on the screen, he remained mostly invisible to audiences. While he was nominated for countless awards throughout his career (winning his first Oscar for his work on Kane), most were either for his musicals or were lifetime achievement awards, and most of those were presented  by European critics. Although The Set-Up won the Grand Prize at Cannes in 1949, the film was mostly panned in the states by critics who much preferred that other, much more crowd-pleasing boxing picture with Kirk Douglas.

Yes American audiences loved his big, bright musical fantasies, but when he went down in the gutter with the losers, the sociopaths, all those people who didn’t have a goddamn chance, and when he did so without following the prevailing conventions, well, that’s another story. In retrospect now, and putting the lie to so many self-satisfied critics and so-called experts, Wise’s crime films proved definitively that noir was much more a question of tone and mood and psychology than a checklist of technical aesthetic points.

by Jim Knipfel

#Jim Knipfel #Robert Wise #The Chiseler #Robert Ryan #Val Lewton #Kirk Douglas

[rironomind]

GS Artists Rec List

I told @the-nysh I would do this so I did. I’m just here to shamelessly promote my favs.  If you want to binge on art, trawl Pixiv and bookmarks. If you want daily art, follow the artists’ Twitter, or @GSnightfight. 

Sidenote: It is strange to know that some of the raunchiest stuff come from mums. 

(Artists under the cut!)

Kinako [Pixiv] [Twitter]- Protec. Their comic strips are so cute and good. Like this one here and an ongoing one on Twitter. I don’t really understand it but it seems like Genos drank a memory loss chemical to forget about how he couldn’t really love Saitama but then ended up in a relationship with him anyway? He calls just calls Saitama “Saitama”, it’s very bittersweet because he regrets drinking it. (Full thread here)

Yutani [Pixiv] - They do doujins, including one where Genos turns into a white wolf and one where Saitama gets double-teamed by devil!Genos and bunny!Genos.

Lisa [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Have I mentioned lately how much I love Lisa? I’ve been following her ever since she did “The person who makes you happy/Happy people” (Part 1/Part 2). She just did an omegaverse doujin too. Her style is a bit anatomically questionable but they look soft and blushy and muscley and romantic so I’m into it. She’s also done a couple of fake movie posters that’s also very tender. ^3^ (Also, nice try Lisa, I know you draw gratuitous bottom!Genos porn on a separate Twitter account.)

Nano [Pixiv] [Twitter] [Tumblr] - Soft, round egg. They did a doujin where Saitama gets fucked while wearing a dress as well as this really nice sfw doujin about Genos realising he likes Saitama. And who could forget this iconic fake twitter video. (Also they’re on tumblr! Please show them more love)

Polon [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Soft watercolour style, lithe muscley egg illustrations in sexy (and funny) poses and outfits. Loads of lovely short R18 comics. One of my favs is in here where Saitama’s cum is turned into Cookies and Cream flavour by a monster and this one where Saitama gets a bad fan letter and needs some TLC. They also have cat!sensei and dog!Genos versions which are super cute. Cat!Sensei is very chubby (it’s in their icon!).

Oikkodeth [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Yall better recognise. Mainly R18 doujins and puts out one every event (that’s like 5 times a year or more). They’ve covered the whole range: hanahaki, Little Red Riding Hood, human torso!Genos and more. Anatomy is a bit stiff but they’re so proficient.

Mido [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Korean but translates her comics to Japanese. Expressive, cute, clean comic style.

Akiyama [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Yall better fucking R E C O G N I S E. They, along with asamizu and a few others, have been posting since 2013. They churn out doujins like a machine and even has their own category in the doujin store, their books took up half a shelf. Consistently cute, punchy dialogue and doesn’t deal with drama. But you don’t need me to tell you. (Look at this though!!)

Hoyu [Pixiv] [Twitter] - You guys remember the sausage pillow comic? Do you like spit, licking, kinks and softcore yandere Genos? You’re gonna love Hoyu. Also, she knows loads of people? I always see her in the comments on twitter. Very skinny boys and twisted love, a new and interesting sketchy style.

Akiko [Pixiv] [Twitter] - A very girly and attentive waifu top!Genos and a tired Saitama. Puts out a comic strip almost every day? #blessed. (Sensei, please be sweet to me!) Doesn’t do R18 very often.

Oishigeru [Pixiv] - Does only doujins, maybe twice a year? Most, if not all are R18 and Saitama always looks vaguely worried. i like Even If mostly because it’s the only one I read all the way through and it’s about insecurities of a relationship. There was another doujin about Genos/Two Saitamas. Does introspective egg very well so I’m immediately biased. Doesn’t post art on twitter so I’m not including it.

Emochikaoya [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Yall already know I’m a massive fan of Kaoya’s work. Kinkwise, if you think of it, she’s probably drawn it. Super efficient, churns out minicomics once a week in between drawing her original comic (can’t stop the thirst, guys). I’m trying to get her to do more coloured illustrations so if you guys want to stroke her ego, I’ll pass it on. My favourite doujin of hers is ‘Who’ and it has hands-down The Best Egg Lecture. Probably one of the few artists who bother to translate to English (you’re welcome). I have a million things to say about her but it would turn into an essay so I’ll stop.

Minerux [Pixiv] [Twitter] - A member of the @GSNightFight challenge on Twitter. Uncertain and worried egg and supportive and very attentive borg. Check out “Curiousity” and “Red String” and a personal fav “Hold on”.

Dokimaru [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Her neko sensei is probably the most iconic. He has a sweatshirt with like 6 nipples? Iconic. they drew a hot springs doujin where Genos turned basically his whole body into a vibe and Saitama caused him to short circuit and blow out every fuse in the ryokan. They set off the fire sprinklers. This one ficart where Saitama gets double-teamed by two Genoses knocked me flat.

Mat [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Mat?? Is so?? Good?? Ever think about how a look can break your heart? Egg is always tired and Genos is worried. Contact is very sweet and makes your heart twinge, and there’s another one they just released about Saitama being cursed with handcuffed hands

Hebitoriasu [Pixiv] [Twitter] - I’m not a big fan of the shading but I can see improvement. Mostly R18 doujins but they’re cute.

Tori/Saboten [Pixiv] [Twitter] - They have two major AUs - fem!Saitama (Nyotama) and Sabo-sensei - and they’re both amazing. Very good readability, very funny comics. If you’re not a fan of fem!Saitama, they have dedicated groups of art for nyotama. Of course my fav of their works is the one with all of Saitama and Genos’ dating problems and the one where Saitama is “Weak to ikemen (handsome guys)”.

Asamizu [Pixiv] - What kind of useless list would this be without Asamizu? Yeah they had their own category too on the doujin shelf. Very nice graphics, and they discuss relationship topics in a candid manner. Been drawing these boys for over 4 years! Mostly doujins. I also have to plug their game (visual novel) about Saitama endlessly repeating a week to try to get Genos to stop asking him out, it will probably last 10 hours. God they do love to ramble.

Toufumaru [Pixiv] - I’ll admit, I’m not a big fan of their recent work (sailor uniform sensei and sensei who wants to be held) but I really like Blue in Blue and Mellow Yellow which talk about Saitama’s non-existent emotions.

Nemunoki [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Mainly R18 doujins. They’ve explored all manner of sexual situations and kinks. Outdoor sex, electricity, double penetration, tentacles, you name it. It’s all amazing. The perspective does throw me off though.

Untara [Pixiv] - Into switch but really likes bottom!Genos anyway. What can I say? Kinky, but hot.

Satoku [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Melancholy egg! Attentive Genos! Does mostly short comics but they’re so cute. Martyr Saitama is my jam!

Kamikoawakakyouko [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Interesting concepts. Recently released a comic that I consider to be the pinnacle of the OPM fandom because it’s Saitama having to consider the environmental/global impact of his strength and how that boils down to affect his everyday life.

Matabi [Pixiv] - Pretty much only doujins. Sensei has moobs and the boys are squishy and blushy. Also does quite a bit of rimming.

Sototuka [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Mostly R18 illustrations with some nice shading but questionable garments. She drew this doujin with futa!Sensei and double-dick Genos. 

Hara Hara [Pixiv] - Saitama is the manic pixie dream girl you guys never thought would exist. Fashion model ingenue. Werk it, sensei. Permanent come hither. Seeing Saitama in dresses brings me life (even if he is super skinny).

Raoki [Pixiv] - Mainly R18 illustrations. I remembered she did sounding with Pocky.

Gmeko [Pixiv] - C U T E. Round and pastels. Soft with lots of TLC. Did a “(I’ll find you) Before the stars do” comic and a hair washing comic.

NICE BOON [Pixiv] - Korean who takes no shit. Fantastic fashion. Little to no BL but the concepts are all on pointe. Existential egg. Eggistential. Locked twitter.

Silver_mssk [Pixiv]  [Twitter] - locked account but if you managed to add her…really, really good eggistential portraits in a variety of scenes. Hilarious comics and a stone face Genos and flailing egg. Also lots of Mobuncle/Saitama scenarios? Which…tbh same.

Foo2333 [Twitter] - What if Saitama took part in enjo kosai (paid dating)? Bottom!Saitama, a soft and sexy egg desired by all. Listen, I don’t make the rules. 

Skaky21 [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Mostly out of the fandom but dips in sometimes. Very polished shiny style. Not my cup of tea but it’s cute.

1200年丸 [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Now mostly BNHA but does OPM sometimes. Mostly SFW. This comic is cute.

ICHIKAZU [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Curly haired boyish Genos! Everyone’s crazy about her Apocaplyse!AU but I prefer her newest doujin where Saitama wins a camera and Genos uses it to take lots of pictures of his sensei.

Kaji Oyaji [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Wowowow so cute and pastel? Is everyone an angel? Am I dead? Soft and sweet. Saitama is like a fairy and Genos is in love. Imagine the embodiment of Spring.

Ginsky [Pixiv] - Chinese. They’ve moved on but boy those were some bright colours and expressive faces.

Tutu_en_f [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Soft romantic sketches. Feel very french but I’m only saying that because she is literally in France now.

COCONUT [Pixiv] - Korean. Fashionable (you see a trend?) Saigenos sketches. Young boyish Genos, manly egg.

Obachan [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Chibi comics. Still active and cute af.

Shiwasu [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Woah this egg is too cute for this world. Does short comics, draws sex but not especially ero. I like this one which is about Genos becoming able to read Saitama’s mind, first kiss (self explanatory) and Saitama losing his strength (R18).

Nyuton [Pixiv] [Twitter] - Active on Twitter. Posts a lot of speed-colouring videos. Nice sketchy feeling but with colour. Likes to borrow concepts from music videos.

Mochi [Pixiv] - Crudely-drawn gag comics with a humour on par with ONE’s. Please, they’re so good. This one opens up with both of them wearing The Dress.

Shout out to starjr_major who is currently in Golden Kamui hell but used to draw some really amazingly cute Saitama.

#ronm #rec list #wow this is long #that's not all of them

[cardsvistas]

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An immigrant looks over his U.S. citizenship affidavit afterward a acclimatization commemoration captivated at … [ ] the U.S. Citizenship and Clearing Services (USCIS), appointment in New York City. (Photo by John Moore/Getty Images)

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For the aboriginal time, U.S. Citizenship and Clearing Services (USCIS) has appear an official government appraisal of the cardinal of H-1B acceptance holders alive in the United States. However, the H-1B appraisal is aggrandized by hundreds of bags of individuals cat-and-mouse years for blooming cards due to the low anniversary allocation and per-country banned on employment-based immigrants, which is not mentioned in the USCIS report.

“A abundant assay of accepted abstracts has assured that as of [September 30, 2019], the H-1B authorized-to-work citizenry is about 583,420,” according to the new USCIS report. “All aliens included in this cardinal are nonimmigrants who accept accustomed allotment from USCIS and the Department of State (if applicable) to assignment in an H-1B specialty occupation.”

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As acclaimed in the report, the amount of 583,420 overstates the cardinal of individuals alive in H-1B cachet as of September 30, 2019. The USCIS assay does not decrease “aliens who captivated a accurate H-1B visa/status but accept alone their visa/status (leaving the United States assuredly or did not attack to access the United States if they are the almsman of an accustomed I-129 address for new employment). Nor does it abolish from the final appraisal aliens with a accurate H-1B acceptance or H-1B nonimmigrant cachet who were denied access by Customs and Border Protection (CBP) at the ports of entry.”

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14 Reasons Why Sears Account Is Common In USA | sears account

The Sears abundance agenda was my aboriginal acclaim agenda ever. I got it in 1994 and accept had no issuers until recently. I don’t use it but already a year to accumulate it active. On Oct 23, 2019 accuse were answerable to my annual I didn’t apperceive until Oct 24, 2019 aback the artifice administration was texting me about a allegation I replied with the N for no. Again I got a buzz alarm allurement me if I answerable over 3,000 admirable in California I replied no. They said, “we are closing your annual and accepting you a new agenda to a new account.” I had no abstraction that any accuse were actually answerable to my card. Until I assuredly was able to get into my online annual and saw there were two accuse for over 3,500. This was ridiculous. They didn’t bolt this until the third attack in the aforementioned sears store.

Now aggregate is busted up cat-and-mouse on a new agenda and a new annual to be opened and the added one closed. They fabricated it assume like it was an accessible action actually not at all. I accept aback spent hours on the buzz with chump annual and the artifice administration of sears Citibank acclaim cards and accept been told annihilation that has actually happened the way they said. So this happened on 10/23/019 begin out on 10/24/19. On 10/26/19 I was aggravating to get into my annual with actually no luck. Spent 30 annual on the buzz with a babe from chump annual who told me that the accuse would be taken off my agenda aural 72 hours. I still couldn’t get into my annual so I kept aggravating with no luck.

I alleged aback to chump annual on 10/30/19 this was it for me. I spent over 3 hours of my activity accepting boilerplate and told altered advice every time. 45 annual with a babe who knew annihilation and should of put addition on the buzz with me who did. I afraid up on her accepting no area actuality told I couldn’t get into my annual until I accustomed the new agenda that was alone beatific out the day above-mentioned on 10/29/19 and it could booty 7-10 days. I alleged the artifice department. There I batten to addition who fabricated me feel alike worse. She was allurement me aback was your agenda stolen. I replied it wasn’t. I accept it appropriate actuality and she was adage things like she didn’t accept why the accuse were still on my annual and so on.

I concluded up accepting off with her calling aback to chump annual and requesting to allege to a supervisor. A nice guy gets on the buzz and says he has both my accounts accessible in advanced of him and told me I was bound out of my new annual for 24 hours because the babe above-mentioned had adapted my buzz number. Whatever, I had enough. He alleged to the artifice administration to see why the two accounts were still accessible and the accuse transferred to my new account. I concluded up actuality transferred to addition artifice being and told that this is the way it’s done. The absolute analysis takes up to 90 canicule and that one allegation had already been removed the aboriginal bulk but still cat-and-mouse on the added one to appear off. She told me that already the analysis is complete they amend the acclaim bureaus with the artifice annual and again accept the new annual on there.

So I assuredly got into my online annual bygone and afflicted my countersign but I can’t do annihilation abroad it’s bound for my protection. I can’t get into my annual I accept had aback 1994 but somehow addition was able to use my advice to allegation over 3,500 annual of stuff. I don’t understand. I’m the buyer of the annual and I can’t alike get into it. So now afterwards the alarm today I am closing my annual already this analysis is over. I’m done. I will booty the hit to my 850 acclaim annual for closing an account. I can’t accord with this anymore.

So I get my new card, I alarm the cardinal to actuate the card, it transfers to a being who asks me a agglomeration of questions that chronicle to my annual aegis questions things like that. I’m ok with it until he has to put me on authority and comes aback asks me some added questions and again tells me he can’t actuate my card. I will either accept a alarm or a letter answer what I allegation to do. I had to authority back. I’m so aggravated. So I accept a new account, a new agenda and I can’t use it.

I’m done with this. I’m closing this annual as anon as I can. I cannot accept that addition who doesn’t accept any of my advice except the acclaim agenda advice can allegation but I can’t alike actuate my new card. This agenda is horrible. Citibank has consistently been abhorrent and abounding years ago I had an affair with them so I bankrupt my annual and I should accept bankrupt this one already sears had to be taken over by Citibank. I achievement this helps anyone who is attempting to get acclaim with this bank. It is horrible. I can accept attention me and my new annual but this is ridiculous. I had every active accessible arrested on my annual and they didn’t alike bolt it until the third attack and now I’m the one adversity because of it. Don’t get a Citicard or Sears Citibank.

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24 Top Risks Of Attending Basquiat Paintings | Basquiat Paintings

Rollo Jensen, Amusing Break (Inspired by Keith Haring) (2020)

When it comes to allowance those impacted by the coronavirus pandemic, no accomplishment is too small. A biggy eight-year-old British artisan called Rollo Jensen has launched (with the advice of his dad) an online exhibition of works in the appearance of artists like Leonardo da Vinci, Gerhard Richter, Banksy and Tracey Emin to accession money for foodbanks alms accoutrement to underserved communities disproportionately afflicted by Covid-19.

“It is actual sad that there are bodies who are not able to allow food, and coronavirus has fabricated this worse because lots of bodies accept absent their jobs,” Jensen, or his dad, writes. “If you accept aliment in your cupboards and additional change in your pocket, amuse angle with me to advice those beneath fortunate.”

Some highlights of the appearance accommodate a painting aggressive by Jean-Michel Basquiat cacographic with the words “When will this end”, “Drink bleach” and “NHS”, and a Keith Haring-inspired painting of two dogs practicing 2 metres of amusing distancing. Using the fundraising website JustGiving, Jensen has already exceeded his ambition of adopting £1,000 for the Trussell Trust, a civic arrangement of aliment banks that provides emergency abutment for bodies in abjection and that campaigns for abiding change.

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11 Secrets About Skeleton Painted Pumpkin That Has Never Been Revealed For The Past 11 Years | skeleton painted pumpkin

It’s that chilling time of year already again, with pumpkins and cobwebs as far as the eye can see. This year, [Mikeasaurus] has put calm article absolutely appropriate – a Ghost Rider apparel with some amazing effects.

The apparel starts with the skull mask, which started with a archetypal from Thingiverse. Conveniently, the archetypal was already set up to be 3D printed in abstracted pieces. [Mike] added adapted the architecture by acid out the average to accomplish it wearable. The affectation was printed in low resolution and again assembled. [Mike] didn’t anguish too abundant about authoritative things absolute aboriginal on, as the final accomplishment complex affluence of sanding and adjustable to get the apparent aloof right. To complete the chilling look, the skull got a lick of ivory acrylic and a afflicted accomplishment with some adulterated atramentous acrylic.

With the beheld apparatus complete, [Mike] angry his absorption to the effects. Light is address of a alternation of self-blinking LEDs, adapted central the affectation to accord the eye sockets a alarming orange glow. However, the pièce de résistance is the smoke effect, address of a able e-cigarette accessory and an aquarium pump. At 225W, and abounding with vegetable glycerine, this aggregate produces blubbery clouds of smoke which arise from the aback of the wearer’s anorak and aural the skull itself. Truly stunning.

[Mike] letters that the apparel is alarming abundant that he has been banned from answering the aperture as Ghost Rider. We anticipate it’s apprenticed to be a hit, regardless. For addition ballsy affectation build, analysis out the Borderlands Psycho. Video afterwards the break.

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Five Great Blue Flower Painting Ideas That You Can Share With Your Friends | Blue Flower Painting

Woolly lambs, blooming blossom, vases awash with attractive flowers – they’re the sorts of august images of Britain in bounce we’re attractive for in our aces new art contest. 

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We may be cooped up in our homes, but all about us we’re acquainted bounce amplification its blind of blooming like never afore and affectionate it added than anytime – as David Hockney said afresh beneath lockdown in France, ‘Do bethink they can’t abolish spring.’ 

So accelerate us your pictures of the division and you could win a four-day painting retreat in Sus or some top-of-the-range art abstracts – and accept your assignment appear in the magazine. 

Here, our arch adjudicator ANDREW MARR urges anybody to enter… 

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Andrew Marr (pictured) aggregate his able art advice, as Weekend annual launches its new Britain in bounce contest

During the lockdown, our minds go aback to places and bodies we can’t visit. Art is one of the best important things for me, and I’m sitting actuality moodily advertent two deserted, bashful places area I’d adulation to be appropriate now.

The aboriginal is a ablaze set of apartment center up a huge bottle belfry at Canary Wharf, home to Clifford Chance, the lawyers.

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There, anxiously afraid and beautifully abiding by them, is an exhibition of paintings by myself and my acceptable acquaintance the artisan Adrian Hemming. 

We alleged it Agitated Times, little cerebration the times would be so agitated that the aperture appearance would accept to be agilely cancelled. It’s still there. But the appearance has never been seen.

The additional is my bound studio, abounding with abandoned canvases, dry brushes and rows of oil paint, additional jars of dry delicate pigment, cat-and-mouse to be accumulated with oil. In accustomed times, this allowance is my anchorage and delight. 

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There would be music playing, aggregate from Nick Cave to Beethoven, and I would be continuing in advanced of the easel, disturbing with a new composition. I would be activity exhilarated, captivated and balked all at once.

Well… not now. The abundant British lock-in is vital, but it’s atrocious to millions of people. Among them, it’s adamantine for artists too. 

No added sitting alfresco with a canvas and misty, rolling hillside. The badge will be on to you in a shot. 

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8 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Go To Soccer Dekes On Your Own | Soccer Dekes

Thaer Harba ,left, and Shedwan Herba, who are Syrian refugees, feel a faculty of association with their soccer aggregation in Victoria. DARREN STONE / Victoria Times Colonist Pro Evolution Soccer 8 Dekes And Dribbles Onto iOS - soccer dekes | soccer dekes VICTORIA — Shedwan Herba dekes the arresting linesman as he active for the goal. He attempts to cantankerous the brawl over to his brother, Thaer Harba, but an opposing amateur gets in the way.The temperature hovers abreast freezing at Saanich’s Tyndall Turf Soccer Field, so the two Syrian brothers accept added hats, gloves and continued johns to their Saanich Fusion soccer kit.It’s on this beer-league men’s soccer aggregation that the men accept begin a family, in a new absoluteness that’s far from the war and the bombs that affected them from their hometown of Idlib in northwestern Syria.Nearly every anniversary for the accomplished two years, Shedwan has put on his dejected and white jersey and affected the role of striker for a Saanich Fusion Football Club over-40 team, allotment of the South Vancouver Island Classic Soccer Association.Thaer abutting the aggregation in September, a few months afterwards he and his ancestors confused to Victoria from Cyprus. Thaer is demography English classes, but said soccer is “an all-embracing language” — one that has helped him and his brother accommodate into the Victoria community.“Soccer, you don’t charge to be affluent or too abundant expenses. To comedy soccer (you aloof need) shoes and brawl and you can comedy wherever you want, in the street, or academy or field,” Thaer said.Shedwan, who alleged soccer his “first hobby,” was alien to the aggregation in 2017 by his sponsor, Paul McCarthy.The team’s manager, Noel Cunningham, accustomed Shedwan, 44, assimilate the team, but bound noticed that his soccer appearance was absolutely altered from what the Canadians were acclimated to.Shedwan is a striker, and uses adorned able to cautiously ball about the added players.The botheration with that, Cunningham said, is that he wasn’t application his adolescent players for support, which acquired some frustration.

Soccer Tricks and Skills - Learn How To Play Soccer by Gooi .. | soccer dekes “It was boxy at first, actually. We bare him to get acclimated to our style,” Cunningham said. “He capital to booty on the accomplished aggregation himself. We bare him to canyon more.”It took some “tough love,” Cunningham said, but Shedwan abstruse to await on his teammates and is now a added able player.Shedwan admits his competitiveness can get the bigger of him: “I don’t like to lose, you know.”Last year, Shedwan was the team’s amateur of the year. Thaer, 46, will be accustomed the approval this year, Cunningham said.Shedwan doesn’t allocution abundant about the activity he larboard behind, added than already back he told his teammates that a amphitheater area his kids acclimated to comedy in Idlib was bombed.Shedwan and his ancestors fled the war in Syria in 2012. They lived ambiguous lives in Turkey and Libya for three years afore actuality resettled to Canada with the advice of McCarthy and a accumulation of sponsors formed through Victoria’s St. Matthias Anglican Church.“It’s a actual alarming place,” Shedwan said of his home country. “There was no best (to stay). It was for the children.”Shedwan’s aunt has lived in Victoria for 40 years, so she affiliated him with a abbey accumulation attractive to sponsor Syrian refugees.Not a day goes by area he doesn’t anguish about admired ones who still alive there: cousins, friends, a brother-in-law and a sister-in-law.Shedwan was able to advice his mother move to Victoria two years ago, followed by Thaer, his wife and three children, who resettled in Victoria six months ago. (The two brothers’ surnames are spelled abnormally due to an clearing affidavit error.)

8 Elite Soccer Moves and Tricks to Beat Any Defender - soccer dekes | soccer dekes The brothers accept three sisters, two of whom are cat-and-mouse for resettlement to Canada.Shedwan’s wife, Lama, knows her bedmate is consistently cerebration of his family. His account soccer amateur accumulate him positive.The aggregation acclimated their beer backing to awning Shedwan’s ante aftermost year, and this year the soccer club waived the ante for Thaer.Even admitting Cunningham insists he’s the manager, not the coach, Thaer calls him “coach” and Shedwan calls him “capitano.”Shedwan has becoming a appellation of his own: Sheddy. As far as beer leagues go, that agency you’re in, Cunningham said.Because of the team’s over-40 demographic, Cunningham has become acclimated to players missing amateur due to abrasion or ancestors commitments. Not the two brothers, though.Neither accept their families.Shedwan’s eight-year-old twins, Thalia and Abdul, and Thaer’s three kids, 10-year-old Sham, nine-year-old Abdul and four-year-old Fares, are accessories at about every game.On a algid December night, eight-year-old Abdul and nine-year-old Abdul wore soccer cleats and shin pads and horsed about on the sidelines, amusement back a Saanich Fusion amateur wrestled them to the ground.McCarthy, who forth with a accumulation of volunteers is allotment three added Syrian families, said Shedwan, Lama, Thalia and Abdul are the “poster kids” for a acknowledged alteration to Canada.

Five Indoor Soccer Skills That'll Turn You Into A Beast - soccer dekes | soccer dekes Shedwan is active his own painting business, alleged Crown Custom Painting, and Lama is advancing in her English classes at the University of Victoria.“You aloof charge aplomb and to assurance yourself,” said Shedwan, back asked the abstruse to a abounding activity in Canada.Thaer is a advocate and ran his own close in Syria. Afterwards he completes his English classes, he hopes to body a career that uses his acknowledged skills. For now, he has soccer.“The Canadian bodies accord us a abundant chance,” Thaer said.Paul McCarthy’s advocacy accumulation is alive to displace a Syrian ancestors of four — a mom, dad and their five- and six-year-old accouchement — who are cat-and-mouse in Lebanon.Formed through St. Matthias church, the accumulation is aiming to accession $40,000 to advice pay the family’s costs for their aboriginal year in Victoria.He’s advancement bodies to accede authoritative a donation to the group, a alms registered with the Intercultural Association of Victoria. “Instead of giving your ancestors addition brace of underwear, accord $25 and we accept a affidavit so bodies can accord that as a allowance beneath the Christmas tree.”McCarthy worries that bodies accept abandoned about the Syrian refugee crisis, while millions abide to alive in refugee camps in the Middle East.“It’s today’s adventure but it’s yesterday’s news,” he [email protected]

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Just Friends ~ Looking Back On Memories (part 46)

Harper White is best friends with Luke Hemmings, they always have been. Not only is she friends with the rockstar, but with the rest of 5 Seconds Of Summer, as well as a really nice girl named Erika.

Harper has a few secrets, she can play all the instruments the boys play and many more. It’s a talent she has kept hidden, only very few people know.

What will happen to the six teens, wondering around the world together?

***

The airport is bursting with life, sleepy, busy, cranky, bored, uncomfortable, and happy people; somthing I can’t seem to feel anymore.

It’s pitch black outside, the lights inside this building remind of school, and I’ve been waiting for someone to pick me up for an hour. So with that, I’m not in the best mood and I’ve got a sore bum.

I’ve got week off from university, and my parents insisted that I come home for the week. I’d rather not, and instead forget everything around me by playing/creating music or going out to parties. Not sitting on my arse all week, looking at everything and being reminded of the memories of him.

He’s not even here, I haven’t talked to him in ages, let alone seen him, yet he’s controlling me and making my life hell, just by being him.

I haven’t spoken to Michael, Ashton, Calum, Erika or Maddie in ages, and I kinda miss them. In a way, I’m greatful I’m not in contact with them, I’d just get reminders of all these memories that I couldn’t handle. Plus, if I talked to any of the boys, they’d transfer everything I’d say, to Luke, and I don’t want anything to do with him.

Luke’s stopped talking to me, the last text I got from him was a day after we talked on the phone. I couldn’t be anymore greatful for that, I can finally get on with my life without looking back anymore. Most of my memories include Luke, most of them are good, and I sometimes have to remind myself that he’s not in my life anymore, then it all hits me harder than the last time.

I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible for me to not think about him at least 500 times a day. He was such a big part of my life, so to not have someone have this big chunk of my heart is excruciating emotional pain. He never gave it back though, he tore it up and stomped on it, then expected me to either mend the shards myself or think I’ll be fine without that key piece.

I’m constantly bearing this heavy feeling in my chest, and I haven’t lost it ever since we were on that damn trampoline back in Australia.

“Harper?” Someone questions behind me.

Whipping my head around and see a girl who is around 14 or 15.

“Oh, hey.” I plaster on a fake smile.

“Hi! I’m such a huge fan, and I’m sorry if I’m bothering you, because it’s really early.” She apologises.

“It’s fine.” I chuckle.

“Can I get a picture?” She asks.

“Of course.” I agree and bend down slightly to get to her level.

I put on a fake ass smile and wait for her to take the picture. The only times I’ve smiled recently is when I think back on memories of Luke and I, but I usually end up crying after that, or when I’m watching tv or somthing.

“Thank you so much, I love you and Erika so much, even though I’m a little sad that you don’t actually make videos together anymore.” She sighs.

“Yeah me too, maybe we can make a video soon.” I shrug.

“That would make my year! Please you have to.” She begs.

“I’ll see what I can sort out.” I wink.

“I saw Luke’s post, and I’m so sorry. You guys were utter goals for many of us, it was such a shock to all of us.” She says.

“It was kinda a shock to me too, but it’s in the past and it had to happen.” You tell her.

“I should get going, my parents are probably expecting me, love you!” She grins and I wave at her with a small smile.

I wish I could brush all this off as easy as I brushed that off.

Sighing and turning around, making my way outside to get some fresh air. You would’ve thought that my Mum or at least someone would remember what time my flight comes in, but no, I had to call and text my Mum and my Dad multiple times to come pick me up.

I still don’t get why I have to be here, Angus and Josh don’t have to, so why me?

Sitting on my suitcase and rolling back and forth to find some kind of amusement. I can’t go on my phone or I’ll end up crying or just be in a really fowl mood. I had to hide the Twitter app, because that’s where I follow most fan accounts and post more.

It’s been so hard seeing his name everywhere, seeing pictures of him everywhere, being sent things about him, it feels like I’m poking a bruise every time I see these things.

I haven’t tweeted, posted anything on Instagram for weeks, I’ve posted videos on YouTube, but I haven’t dared to look at the comments.

Seeing the familiar short woman walk towards me with a big smile and sympathetic eyes.

“I’m so sorry we forgot what time your flight was, we thought it was tomorrow at 2:15 in the morning.” She apologises and pulls me into a hug.

“I slept a lot on the plane anyway so I’m not that tired.” I shrug.

“Again, sorry.”

“Where’s dad?” I ask.

“He’s still in bed.” She chuckles.

“It is 3:30, can you blame him?”

“True.” She nods and helps me put my suitcase in the back.

“Thanks.” I mutter and walk towards the passenger seat.

“How have you been?” She asks as she turns the engine on.

“Fine.” I say what I’ve rehearsed for the past couple months.

“So, your birthday is coming up soon…” She trails off.

“Oh shit, yeah.” I realise.

Am I really gonna be 19 in a few days?

“Got any plans?” She asks.

“No, I’m going back home the day after so I don’t wanna do anything too crazy.” I tell her.

“Okay, what do you want?” She questions.

Happiness? Self-esteem? Confidence? Mental stability?

“I don’t know, Mum.” I shrug.

“Well have a think about it, you’ve only got a few days.”

“Can I have an Ashley Purdy?” I ask.

***

“But I’m trying too hard again.” I sing. “Wait, no, get out of my head.” I scold myself.

Do you know how hard it is not to sing such great songs? I’ve had to delete all of their songs from my playlist, but somtimese I put a daily mix on and their songs come on and I can’t stop myself from not listening just to hear his voice again.

“Hey, Harper, I just got a load of film developed from the past couple of years, including some disposable cameras from your room, so if you want to have a look at them, they’re in a box in the living room.” My mum walks into my room.

“Uh okay, are there any pictures of, uhm, Luke?” I ask with a shaky voice.

“There’s a few, he’s been part of your life for a long time, there’s bound to be a few, love.” She sympathetically smiles.

I nod and stand up, I can’t let him do this to me for all of my life.

Walking into the lounge and being hit with nostalgia, but I try to reel myself away from getting sucked into those memories making me feel like it’s real but it’s just a false reality.

Who am I kidding? I’m about to look at a load of pictures from the past few years, I’m gonna choke on the nostalgia.

Standing over the box, I already get faced by his stupid gorgeous face.

“What? Gonna break my heart again? You’ve already done it, so how hard could it be to do it again?” I spit at the picture.

“What am I doing with my life? I’m talking to a damn picture of my ex boyfriend.” I bitterly chuckle at myself.

“You have no idea how much I wanna rip you to shreds but then stick you together again.”

“I really have to let you go.” I sigh and pick up a stack of pictures.

“The oldest ones are at the front and they go back to when you were 15 or 16.” My mum calls from the kitchen.

I nod, even though she can’t see me, and put the stack back, grabbing a stack from the front.

This looks like when I was 16, when I was at one of my lowest points, and to be honest, I’m walking along that edge of falling down a very deep, dark hole, whilst the Jaws theme tune plays, and it’s gonna take a really long time to climb out again.

I wouldn’t say I’m depressed, I haven’t given myself time to get there, I’ve just busied myself away from that sticky situation, but saying that, I might of fallen in that hole a long time ago, I just haven’t noticed, and I’ve mistaken this heavy feeling in my chest for heartbreak, not depression.

I even hate that damn fucking word.

Going through a few photos, they are just of my family or of the cat, then skimming past a few until I find some of me, not to sound vain or anything.

“Oh my god, I haven’t seen this in ages.” I chuckle.

It’s a picture of Michael, Luke, and I, we’re all wearing these funny sunglasses, paint and pen on our faces,  have customized shirts on and are in mid laugh. I think it was some fundraiser thing at school. I vividly remember drawing a dick on Michael’s cheek.

Taking a picture of the photo on my phone, which may not be very wise to do for the long run, but I don’t care much right now.

“Remember this photo?” I ask my mum with a smile when she walks past.

“Oh my God yeah, it took ages to get that paint and pen off your bodies.” She laughs.

“Luke and I spent about 2 hours in the bathroom scrubbing each others faces.” I smile at the memory. The first genuine smile in a while.

I have to post this, I need to share it with someone. Revealing the app again, not daring to read anything, but just clicking the small circle in the corner and attaching the picture, with the caption: ultimate throw back 😂.

Not tagging either of them, just posting it, not expecting anything to come out of it, it’s just a picture after all.

Putting my phone down after I posted it on instagram too and going back to the pictures.

One of me and Erika, we were at a party or something and Ashton brought a camera out, so we took some pictures together, nothing too special about it, but we looked happy, despite me being so down that whole time.

After skipping a few, just of me and the boys and just Erika at the time, or of the boys alone. I go through a stacks or two, before I get to when I was 17, that was quite a good year, I had a budding relationship with Luke and made some good memories with even better people.

Picking up a new stack and leaning back on the sofa. Straight off the bat, I’m faced with a heart breaking picture of me and Luke. Luke’s looking at the camera whilst I’m looking at him, I’m not sure if I was waiting to see what he was doing or if was just looking at him randomly, but you can literally see the love in my eyes. We weren’t even dating then, we were still just friends.

Putting that to the back, then looking at the next one, it’s just of Luke, very candid, he is playing guitar, looking very determined/concentrated. It’s very Luke.

The one after that is another one of Luke and I, if I can remember correctly, I think we were at Calum’s house for a party in celebration for something. I’m pressed up against the wall, Luke’s forearm is above my head on the wall, his whole body is inches away from mine, and we’ve both got smirks on our faces. We’d probably had a bit to drink and were flirting a little.  

If only they knew what would happen to them.

Putting that to the back again and a small smile grows on my face when I see the one next to it. Luke and I are standing somewhere I don’t recognise, and our arms are wrapped around each other, Luke’s kissing my cheek but you can see he is smiling into it, he is holding my chin, and I’ve got a big smile going on.

Aw, so naive.

After a while of going through stacks of pictures, I didn’t know how big of a lump was in my throat when my Dad said hello to me.

I’ve early finished going through the age of 17, I’ve just put back a stack from halloween and a little after that.

Pulling out a new bunch, and my breathing hitches as I see the first one. It’s from the time we went to Dubai, where it all started; where all this mess started. The Sun is setting, the clouds are all pink, Luke’s standing beind me while I’m standing in front of him, and he’s kissing my head as I’m taking a picture of the sky for my Instagram.

I think the only person who knows that Luke was doing that to me whilst that picture was taken is the person who is behind the camera.

Going through a couple more, until I find another one of Luke and I. I remember this moment vividly, Luke is standing next to me, but facing me and he just whispered something in my ear, it was a stupid dirty joke that I can’t remember, then he laughed when I finally got it, and placed his hands on my stomach and back, pulling me closer towards him. Suddenly someone came up towards us, I think it was my Mum, and she said ‘cheese’ as Luke kissed my cheek, so he quickly whipped his head towards the camera, having a big grin on his face.

Looking at a few more until I realise I’m crying, seeing a few droplets splash onto the picture of Luke and I, he’s looking at me whilst I’m looking at the camera, you can see the love in his eyes.

If he loved me so much, why did he throw my heart away as if it didn’t matter to him?

Luke’s P.O.V.

“Has anyone seen Harper’s Twitter?” Calum breaks the silence.

“No?” I question.

“Go have a look.” He gestures.

I give him a sceptical glance before typing in her all too familiar username into Twitter, clicking on her profile and wait for it to load for a few seconds- the internet is shit here.

My breathing stops and a smile makes it’s way onto my face.

“Awww, I remember that.” I chuckle.

“I’m looking good.” Michael laughs.

“Nice hair, Mike.” Calum says.

“Where?” Ashton speaks up and I show him my phone. “Aw, look at these three cuties.” He cooes.

“Shut up.” Michael and I say in unison.

“Where was Calum?” Ashton asks.

“I’m not sure, but he definitely wasn’t there that day.” I shrug.

“It took me ages to get that shit off, how long did it take for you guys to get it off?” Michael questions.

“It took us hours, we were in her bathroom for hours, just scrubbing each others faces, arms, and legs. I think the process would’ve sped up if we weren’t together, half the time we were just messing around.” I laugh at the memory.

“Didn’t Harper draw a dick on my face?” Michael asks.

“Probably.” I smile.

I’m not sure when the last time I properly smiled and laughed was- probably when I was with her. It feels so good to feel happiness again, even better because she caused it, but it also feels bad because she’s no longer with me, and I can’t relive these memories with her.

That was one of my favourite things to do with her; relive memories. We have so many together, that there’s endless amounts of hours that could be spent reliving these memories.

I think that plays a big part in why this hurts so much, I’ve known her my whole life, I’ve got far too many memories of her for me to be okay with that.

***

“Oooooh, Australian air!” Michael excitedly says and runs off.

“What a child.” Ashton shakes his head.

“Yeah.” I agree.

“Hey, if you weren’t so sad, you’d be with him, most likely in front of him.” Calum points out.

“Shut up.” I mutter and go on my phone.

We’ve come back to Australia for a few days for a mini break. We’re all a little homesick I think, so it will do us all good, and to refresh our minds.

“Luke!” My mum grins and pulls me into a motherly hug.

“Mum!” I mock and wrap my arms around her shoulders.

“How have you been?” She asks pulling me back, keeping her hands on my arms.

“Alright.” I dismiss and she looks at me sympathetically.

“You have to deal with this at some point, Luke. You can’t just keep brushing it under the rug.” She tells me.

“I know mum, can we just go home? I’m tired.”

“Whatever, come on.” She gestures with a nod.

“Bye guys, I’ll see you later or something.” I say the boys and they all wave with a small smile.

We walk away from the airport, and head back towards the place where it all started.

We’ve been in the car for a while now, I’ve just had my headphones in the majority of the time.

“How does it feel to be back home again?” My mum asks as we turn into our road.

“Uhh,” I pause as we are coming up to Harper’s house, looking at her window, the sun shining in, making an orange tinge light it all up. Her car is still the on the driveway, I remember the times we would drive around if we were bored or couldn’t sleep, and just play really loud music, singing along together, we’d usually drive to a fast food place, and eat, talking about whatever comes to mind. I must be imagining it, but I could’ve sworn I just saw her or someone very similar walk past the window.

I really need to sleep.

“Luke?” My mum interrupts my thoughts.

“Oh yeah, uh, it feels good to be here again.” I nod.

“It’s her birthday tomorrow, isn’t it?” She points out.

“Yep.” I say and look at my lap.

“Are you gonna wish a happy birthday?” She gingerly asks.

“Probably not, uh, yeah, probably not.”

“What’s the worst that can happen, Luke?” She questions as she pulls into our house.

“I can’t do it Mum, I can’t bring myself to do it.” I dismiss and slam the car door behind me, before making my way to my room.

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