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speter-sparker · 5 years

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Spideypool fic rec #2

ya boy is back at it again with the whole procrastination thing, and if I'm going down, ill bring all of you with me.

other recs by me: X

1) Peter Parker's Home for the Wayward Villain by BeanieBaby [90k, complete]

summary: A really long redemption story.

my thoughts: you know how every ship has That One Fic? The one that every person who recs fic recs? This is it. In a world where Peter Parker was never bitten by a radioactive spider (but still lives in a world of heroes), he still has a chance to make a change.

additional info: found family, strangers to friends to lovers, slow burn, POV peter

2) Said the Fly to the Spider by BC_Brynn [20k, complete]

summary: Peter is being courted by Deadpool. With words. And life-saving.

my thoughts: so damn good. the story is character and relationship-focused, with witty banter and dumb jokes - in short, the perfect spideypool fic. Pacing is on point, side characters are in character, just... *chef kiss* beautiful.

additional info: friends to lovers, slow burn, POV peter

3) the kubler-ross theory by antivenom [80k, complete]

summary: Peter loses Gwen in a split-second of motion. It takes much, much longer for him to find himself afterwards.

(In which Peter deals with a loss that immobilizes him and permeates through every drawn breath. In which his grief is a visceral abstraction that he can touch, that he can feel. And in which, with a little help, with time, with acceptance, with anger, with sadness, with Wade, he learns how to live in a world without her.)

my thoughts: if you read nothing else on this list, READ THIS. It deals with the aftermath of Gwen Stacy’ death, and how Peter copes (or doesn't) with the aftermath. This story is a love letter to everyone who has lost someone - the stages of grief, the anger and confusion and emotion are so real. Everything is brutally honest, the author doesn't hold back punches - in fact, it's because of this that I love how Wade and Peters's relationship is written. They are both shown as flawed characters who are trying so damn hard and their relationship feels real. The same can be said for every character in this fic - the relationships with aunt may and MJ and other supers are beautifully thought out and written.

additional info: HOPEFUL ENDING, slow burn, pre-relationship, hurt/comfort, POV Peter

4) I'll Tell No Lies by doctorestranged [78k, complete]

summary: When a series of murders take place, Peter Parker goes undercover in Sister Margaret’s to get intel on Tony Stark’s prime suspect: Deadpool. Except, Peter is horrible at lying and this seems like a dreadful idea. Peter goes in hoping to get enough information so that Spider-Man can save the day, but like everything in Peter’s life, it becomes a bit more complicated than that.

my thoughts: The pacing is so fun - it’s a murder mystery with a heavy side of romance, featuring Tony not-angry-just-disappointed ok-a-little-angry Stark, a very done Weasle, and one taxi driver.

additional info: strangers to friends to lovers, SMUT, POV Peter

5) Without Ever Letting You Know by TimidTurnip [8k, complete]

summary: So something weird is going on with Deadpool, that's nothing new. Spewing flower petals is hardly the strangest thing the merc has done. The part that is confusing Peter is that Deadpool doesn't want Spider-man around. WTH.

my thoughts: mmm, hurts so good. Love how they examine Peter’s personality and relationship to Wade in this one.

additional info: Hopeful ending, PINING, friends to lovers, POV Peter

6) i know your secret by jilliancares [8k, complete]

summary: “I’m your new neighbor,” Wade forged on, oblivious to Peter’s state of shock, and he stuck out a scarred hand. Peter gripped it, feeling numb, and gave it a shake. Did Wade realize who he was? No, clearly not. He was acting way too normally. Wade was one for dramatics.

my thoughts: Fluff CENTRAL. Wade and Peter are given a playful relationship that can only be described as puppy love.

additional info: fluff, identity porn, friends to lovers, POV Peter

7) The Naked Truth by CAPSING [20k, complete]

summary: Wade is not a cat person. But maybe he'll make an exception to get into some cute guy's pants.

my thoughts: CAT FIC! THERE'S A CAT!

additional info: pining, strangers to friends to lovers, vet!peter, Wade is still Deadpool, POV Wade

8) The Boys Wear Red... by Orcusnox (Cat9894) [108k, complete]

summary: Wade is a hero, Peter is a merc.

my thoughts: HOLY HECK??? if you thought Spider-man 3 was dark, Raimi ain't got nothing on this. My biggest worry going into this was that Peter and Wade would just swap places and character, but that could not be further from the truth. Peter is dark, but in a way that fits who he is, who he would be if he jumped off the deep end. Everything in this feels thought out and works well together - the character writing is smooth and logical, even for side characters. The plot is fun and exciting, the banter even more so.

additional info: Hopeful ending, some smut later, gore/violence, past mentions of abuse, frenemies to friends to lovers, POV Peter

9) Allostasis by ruralfishingcat [42k, complete]

summary: Peter had a tendency to put up walls to isolate himself; even as Spider-Man, he could only suffer through so much death and destruction. It was precautionary, really, and those he'd pushed away would thank him were they aware of the circumstances. Of course, Deadpool had his own tendencies, one of which was to break down said walls (fourth ones included). As grating as it was, a small sliver of Peter hoped the mercenary would be able to succeed.

my thoughts: fucking cute my dude. Identity porn to the max, and a butt crap of pining.

additional info: friends to lovers, protective Wade, identity porn, POV Peter

10) what light through yonder window by hellornothing [14k, complete]

summary: The figure moves quickly, but Peter’s faster. He’s still adjusting to the sudden brightness, so dark red is really the only thing he takes from this initial encounter, but it’s enough.

‘Deadpool?’

-aka the one where they get together via late night window visits

my thoughts: THESE TWO! *clenches fist* ya know? just them realizing they have massive heart boners for each other

additional info: friends to lovers, fluffflufffluff, mama mia that's a lot of F’s, POV Peter

11) Patron Saint by isaDanCurtisproduction [58k, complete]

summary: Peter is desperate. Hungry and alone on the streets, he's ready and willing to do anything to change his situation, even if just for a night. And sharing a stranger's bed would be no hardship, especially when the alternatives include dumpster-diving for dinner and sleeping, arms wrapped around him, beneath a chilly and indifferent sky.

Then a man named Wade Wilson steps into his life.

my thoughts: The plot is simple and allows for GREAT character moments. I clutched my heart cause they were so cute and just GAAAHH! the chemistry is great, the banter is fun, the plot is on point. 10/10 would (and do) recommend

additional info: strangers to friends to lovers, no actual smut, be prepared to clutch a titty, identity porn, pining, homeless Peter, POV Peter

12) better than being alone by darkavengerz (darkavenger) [6k, complete]

summary: Peter's been asked to attend a children's birthday party as Spider-Man, and he's surprised to discover someone else masquerading as him when he turns up at the party.

my thoughts: this is so them. the story is character-focused and just so gosh darn fun. I love my boys just harassing each other for funzies

additional info: friends to lovers, fluff, POV Peter

13) Nobody's Business by DittyWitty [6k, complete]

summary: Peter really wasn't supposed to out himself to Deadpool.

my thoughts: insecure Peter, meet insecure Wade. Now go use big boy words and fucking COMMUNICATE

additional info: friends to lovers, POV Peter

14) you grow up and you lose touch by scarlett_starlett [53k, complete]

summary: Peter always thought that when he had kids, there would be someone by his side.

Instead, he has a mouthy mercenary acting as a chef every night for him and his newly adopted son and a narcissistic billionaire philanthropist paying child support on the sly. But Peter figures it isn’t all bad, especially when Miles loses that dullness in his eyes whenever Wade slips on the banana peels he ‘strategically’ places all over the apartment for Peter as a joke.

my thoughts: usually not one for kid fics - the kids aren't well written and characters tend to be OC. But this one, this one, just shattered my every expectation. The relationship between Peter and Miles, Peter and Wade, and Wade and Miles is phenomenal. The story and plot are wonderful, with themes that you can't help but sink your teeth into. The pining is off the walls. The characters are rounded and complex and grow so much with each other. I cannot recommend this one enough, please by GOD go read it

*** side note: go read everything by this author. go, get outta here! go!

additional info: SLOW burn, friends to co-parents to lovers, PINING GALORE, POV alternating but mostly POV Peter

15) A Vicious Cycle by DecimalDrones [2k, complete]

summary: Peter can't remember the life he and Wade supposedly shared together. It's alright as long as he's happy, though, isn't it?

my thoughts: y’all. Y’ALL. okay, this one is short and sweet but when you finish, go back and read it a second time. The double meaning and context make this fic DELICIOUS. I also recommend checking out their other fics - they’re a bit longer but still easy to finish in a day.

additional info: established relationship, POV Peter

16) on staying around by WylderWolf [4k, complete]

summary: Fourteen pages of loud fart noises.

(also there's some, like, emotions and stuff, and then they bump nasties. it's pretty rad.)

my thoughts: charming little thing with pining wade. Also, they’re both idiots (but what's new)

additional info: friends to lovers, pining, smut at the end, POV Wade

#fic #fic rec #spideypool #spideypool fic rec #peter parker x wade wilson #Peter Parker/Wade Wilson #wade wilson x peter parker #wade wilson/peter parker #peterwade #wadepeter #im doing this instead of homework but whats new

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lordgeebsdom · 4 years

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2019, a year in review: Superlative Edition

-Gareth Bill

Athlete of the year: Lamar Jackson - QB Baltimore Ravens. HM: Kawhi Leonard - SF Toronto/LA

Lamar Jackson came out of nowhere to light the league on fire in 2019 breaking Michael Vick’s all-time record for rushing yards by a Quarterback and redefining the position in the process. From his five touchdown performance in Miami to being the assumed MVP, there wasn’t a week where Lamar Jackson didn’t dominate headlines and he continues to show superiority as Baltimore has secured the Number 1 seed in the AFC. Honorable mention goes to Kawhi Leonard for producing the first ever buzzer beater in a game 7 in NBA history and for also bringing Canada their first NBA title. Even against a Kevin Durant-less Golden State Warriors team, Leonard stepped up and delivered when it counted most.

Song of the year: Lost Lately- San Holo. HM: Daemon Veil - EPROM & G Jones

Sander van Dijck, better known by his stage name “San Holo” surprised us with “Lost Lately” in June of this year. A melancholic and melodic ballad of discovery and feeling “lost in aftermath of a breakup” spoke to feelings of insecurity and extends a friendly hand to those in need. From an endearing marketing campaign featuring “lost” posters where fans could call a “helpline” to hear an exclusive sample of the song, to a music video taken straight from EDC: Bitbird executed an almost perfect build and drop for “Lost Lately.” Great followup work to last years “Album1” and I definitely am excited about his future projects for 2020. Honorable mention goes to the IDM monster “Daemon Veil” by EPROM and G Jones. Plain and simple, I loved this ear worm. There’s so much going on from the initial baseline drop to the stuttering minefield of drops and turns that follows before a calming conclusion. Every time I hear this track, I see it too: the flying snares, the zips, zooms and wubs, the story it tells me….its captivating and satisfying. While it isn’t as friendly for casual listening like my 2018 song of the year “Time” (also by G Jones), Daemon Veil is an IDM banger that I’ll continue to blast well into 2020 and beyond.

Album of the year: Good Faith- Madeon. HM: Hollywood’s Bleeding - Post Malone

This was a tough call for me, there was a lot of great albums that came to us in 2019 but Madeon’s “Good Faith” stands tall above the rest. From the initial singles of “All My Friends,” and “Dream, Dream, Dream,” to the unexpected bangers of “Miracle,” and “No Fear, No More,”: “Good Faith” makes a solid argument not just for album of the year but possibly even for the decade and I simply cannot recommend it enough. Honorable Mention goes to “Hollywood’s Bleeding” by Post Malone. Like many, I have thoroughly enjoyed the evolution of Post Malone from SoundCloud sensation to certified super-star, and “Hollywood’s Bleeding” continues to show us that this artist is just getting started. I loved “Goodbyes,” “Circles,” “Sunflower,” and many other tracks on that album, and I’m confident many others did as well. Rapper, Rockstar, Soul-singer and bro: best of luck in 2020 and beyond Post, we’re all eagerly watching.

Movie of the year: Its a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood. HM: Avengers: Endgame

Easily the most contested category of the year and the hardest decision made in these superlatives. 2019 produced some awesome films but Tom Hanks’s take on Fred Rogers gave me chills that I hadn’t felt since seeing Christopher Reeve’s Superman as a child. Like Superman, his presence among adults and children alike would universally cause awe and calm, almost god-like tranquility through security. In a year that was defined by division, unrest, cruelty, and anger: Fred Rogers reminds us that there’s still a great deal of hope for humanity, and it all starts with being a good neighbor. Young, old and everyone in between can learn something from this deeply affecting story about humanity and connection. Honorable mention goes to Avengers: Endgame for managing to be the only major franchise ending this year (Game of Thrones, Avengers, Star Wars) that managed to do it with a consensus BANG! It was a 3 hour film that somehow felt like an hour and half, and when Captain America held Mjornir with every Avenger ever at his back and said “Avengers, Assemble!”, I couldn’t help but fist pump with a grin from ear to ear. Tony Stark’s dying words of “I am Iron-Man,” gave me goosebumps and Black Widow’s death made me feel genuine loss: The Marvel Cinematic Universe managed to execute a singular plan and vision over 23 films and that is truly exceptional.

Actor/Actress of the year: Joaquin Phoenix as Arthur/Joker. HM: Florence Pugh - Midsommar

Joaquin Phoenix’s long anticipated and controversial performance as Joker was the best singular work I saw this year. Authentic, gut-wrenching, thought-provoking, and anything but boring: Joker gave us the next step in comic book cinema and a new cultural icon in the process. Arthur Fleck is a poster child for mental illness, something that currently is at the forefront of our society and gave the general public a poster child for such conditions. Phoenix’s Joker will one day be recognized in the same light as we currently see Che: an underdog figure of resistance and revolution standing against a seemingly unstoppable status quo and inspiring the unseen masses in the process. Honorable mention has to go to one of my new favorites in Florence Pugh and her performance as Dani in “Midsommar”. Her pain, confusion, and ultimate triumph that unravels throughout a trip to a small village in Europe during their mid-summer festival is the stuff of “slow-burn horror” wet-dreams. There’s a scene early on where her character has to convey immense grief after suffering a personal tragedy and I can still hear that crying in the most haunting way. Pugh’s performance stuck with me in a year full of great ones, and I’m very excited to see her future work including “Black Widow” in May.

Television show of the year: Watchmen- HBO. HM: Good Omens - Amazon Prime

Watchmen blew my mind, and I the less I say about it, the better. A continuation of the story told in my favorite book of all-time, “Watchmen” managed to tie together many loose plot threads from that story while also moving the universe forward in new and exciting ways that matched the tone of the graphic novel. Regina King’s “Sister Night” was a complex, likable, and tragic protagonist uniquely qualified to walk us through this new chapter, and without spoiling things anymore than I already may have: YOU NEED TO WATCH THIS. Honorable Mention goes to Good Omens on Amazon Prime. To any familiar with the story or Neil Gaiman’s work in general, you know what to expect: deep stories, complex and likable characters, and witty dialogue that will make you pause and think or laugh feverishly in equal measure. Its only 5 episodes, so there’s really no excuse to not dive into this one and see how the world ends…..or rather was supposed to…

Game of the year: Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice - PS4/XboxOne/PC. HM: Apex Legends - PS4/PC/XboxOne

From Softwares’ “Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice” stands tall in a year that finally saw long awaited projects like Obsidian’s “Outer Worlds” and Kojima’s “Death Stranding” get long-awaited releases. An exciting and more stealthy evolution of the Dark Souls combat system made me feel like a real Ninja for the first time since Ninja Gaiden Black on my original Xbox. The demanding, but fair gameplay combined with a variation of environments including haunted Japanese forests, Sengoku Temples, Palaces and gory battlefields came together to give the most complete package I played in 2019. Just don’t be too surprised if the final boss gives you problems because that f***er can almost made me break a controller. Honorable mention goes to the game that managed to dethrone “Fortnite” as the most popular game for like a whole two months. Respawn entertainment developed the awesome Titanfall series that I personally enjoyed and rumors had been circulating for quite awhile that they were looking to expand Titanfall into the booming genre of BR or Battle Royale. Apex Legends is the answer to those prayers and still continues to push out new skins, content and weapons at a regular rate. Did I mention it is also completely free to play?

Story of the year: President Trump becomes the third President to ever be impeached 12/19

HM: Henry Nobrega wins the fucking BVN Football Fantasy Football title. 11/19

To be perfectly honest, this is the first category that really could have gone either way for me. President Trump becoming the third President in US history to be impeached for abuse of power and obstruction of congress was massive; regardless of how you feel about President Orangutan. His tenure as President has produced a number of newsworthy moments but this story stood out among the others for sheer importance and international embarrassment. Speaking of embarrassment, that’s essentially what my good friend Henry’s fantasy football team has managed to be every year that I’ve played with him. A perennial basement dweller that typically auto drafts due to some BS excuse, and a resident near the bottom of our power rankings but this year he flipped that script on its head. He managed to draft my Athlete of the year, Lamar Jackson, and the last great white running back in Christian McCaffrey. Not only did Henry surpass his preseason ranking of bottom, he managed to win both regular season and postseason titles and beat a solid team by Graham Heck in the process. I got love for you bro, but I’m still perplexed on how your season managed to be as dominant as it was. Sorry Greta Thunberg, but these stories had my jaw on the floor, maybe next year lil’ Queen.

Meme of the year: Baby Yoda of the Disney+ show “The Mandolorian”

Was there every really a doubt here? Baby Yoda or “The Child” as he’s known on the show is the biggest pop culture icon born on the internet in 2019. The gap between Baby Yoda and what I considered to be an honorable mention was so wide that he will officially stand alone in this category. Baby Yoda’s cuteness managed to melt even my stone cold heart this year and that is absolutely an achievement. What made this creature so endearing was the universal applicability though music, sports, culture, and food: Baby Yoda was everywhere and the internet found common ground and shared meaning through sharing little graphics everywhere prominently featuring him as the centerpiece. Well played Jon Favreau, we love this little guy and everyone thanks you for creating him.

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spideyswebhead · 4 years

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Writing 7 Prompts For 15 Minutes

I thought of publishing these here for my writing class.

We were given 10 prompts to write to for 15 minutes everyday, here’s what I wrote for that week.

Something I’ll remember when this quarantine is over

The nights I spend time with my friends and family, talking about literally anything on our minds and just going off.

I was never good at communicating and making sure to talk to people, especially through text message, and I definitely still need to get better with texting and checking in with my older siblings who are away from me at this time.

But being stuck in this house with my little sister and parents is making me get closer to my younger sister, both of us having to be there for each other as she deals with school and missing school, and helping my mom around the house as she still goes out there and help other families take care of their children.

I’ll remember the nights I was curled up in my chair, a Christmas blanket I got on Christmas - green with snow and snowmen - wrapped around me to keep warm in my cold room. Lou, my little sister, sitting on my bed as she fills pages of paper to put paper hearts for her friend's birthday.

We were both watching Grey’s Anatomy, occasionally we would make comments and jokes on the ridiculously things that’ll happen or they’ll say, but sitting quietly until 1 in the morning. Lou finally noticing the time, finishing up filling the jar she had been placing the hearts in, saying sorry for losing track of time and we both exchange our good nights before we both go to bed.

Even though I was exhausted the next morning from waking up so late, I still enjoyed that time of spending time with my little sister. We never spent much time before this quarantine just for the fact we are both in different stages in our lives, and we’re completely different people.

Lou needs to be around people all the time, go to events for her school, and be out of the house to explore the world and have fun creating memories.

While there’s me who enjoys spending time at home, writing my little projects or making art pieces, spending time on social media and talking with friends about fandom stuff, and enjoy cuddling with my dog.

I’ll remember the nights of talking with my friend Charna on PlayStation, watching her play some kind of game, be it “Dead By Daylight” or “The Last Of Us,” and just talking about literally anything. Sometimes we’ll just be talking on PlayStation and be playing separate games all together. Her playing “The Witcher” games while I played the Marvel Spider-Man game, occasionally making small talk or she’ll laugh at me being frustrated over Peter Parker getting stuck on walls or yelling “Fudge Cake!” As I make a mistake with a challenge. My way of cursing but not really.

What’s familiar to me about all of this

Is the many movies, shows, even books who touch on subjects like diseases, quarantine, and protest.

Except it feels like the author decided to take all these subjects and mash them together, take their readers for a whirlwind of emotions.

Looking back at subjects like quarantine and diseases is interesting, now knowing how people react when we’re under a type of threat we can’t see or even see coming. Usually people freak out and drive everywhere and hoard things that would make sense, like food and water, but now I always look at the toilet paper in those kinds of scenes and it seems they haven’t been touched that much makes it seem unrealistic. Seeing how today people went insane and hoarded it to the point of fighting old women for one even though their carts are already full, seeing the worst of humanity as they work their their anxieties that tell them how to survive.

The racism that comes out of it when a sickness is attached to a race (like the Spanish Flu).

I’ve been spending time in quarantine listening to audio books and I have been reading “The Diviner’s” series, the second book dealing with a disease and racism. “Lair of Dreams,” one of the characters - Ling - being Chinese and living down in Chinatown in New York, a sickness more popular down there called “The Sleeping Sickness” where you don’t wake up from your deep sleep until you die.

Quarantine was everywhere, burning bodies and giving out curfews, and how Ling was targeted with racism to the point of being beaten by a group of college boys until a friend of Ling’s came over and helped her.

It made me feel terrible for Asian people that these things still happen when a disease gets attached to a race, but also keep my attention on movies where their surviving some kind of things, see what they grab now that COVID-19 has happened and we’ve been in Quarantine these past 3 months and see how the world has reacted. Positively or negative.

I don’t like to think too much about

Anxiety, I try to ignore it as much as I can when it comes creeping up in the back of my mind, whispering worries and dark thoughts. Catching me at the worst of times, like doing the dishes or trying to take my dog out for a walk.

Am I washing this dish right? If I lose my grip will it break and scatter glass everywhere? Is that man staring at me, is he going to follow me? Are those people going to respect social distancing and leave me and my dog alone? Am I doing this right?

Trying to go through my day without anxiety whispering in my ear and slowly getting louder is hard nowadays, with everything feeling so much bigger now with the pandemic and the movements happening. The grief of what’s happening making anxieties voice louder in the back of my mind and anxiety is freaking out more about everything.

But I know ignoring anxiety makes it worse, making it come back bigger and harder to pass the next time it comes around again. But yet I find myself being lured by anxieties worries and believing their words, following them more in the dark and not able to stop myself until I catch myself being engulfed by their worries. Then I have to remind myself to breathe and try to talk anxiety down.

Sometimes anxiety is hard to calm down when I talk back, way too wind up in a knot it’s hard to unravel them enough that I can undo the knot and we can both go on our merry way. Instead we both just end up crying in the darkness by ourselves, letting each wail out and stressful tears roll down and join the others in a puddle on my sheets.

But sometimes on those days I have to remind myself, crying is as important as talking back. Cause maybe Anxiety needs somebody there just to let out all that stress so we can go back to reality and thrive another day. Let those wails out and tears be able to roll instead of holding them in and having to deal with another bigger one. Especially if we’re in public and not able to find a place so nobody can bother us.

Those nights where I’ll indulge anxiety when they creep up I try to be there for them, let us both hold each other tight before I’ll take the first controlled breath and mumble to them “We’re okay, we got this and can go through another day, together.”

I love thinking about

The dream I had a couple days ago.

I’m an artist and writer, I love doing both and learning on being an artist and growing those skills have really helped my writing grow, finding more words to describe something and being able to see my characters or scenes in my head, be able to really see them and write them in those details. Sometimes able to bring them to life on page through drawing by just my words.

Back in May it was my Dad’s birthday and I had made this popcorn holder where I painted various things on there, Darth Vader and Kermit the Frog singing “Rainbow Connection.” I was so proud how it came out and was really excited to show it to him and see his reaction.

The day I gave it to him, shaking with anxiety for his reaction, and he looked at it, turning it in his hands as he looked over it and then the words were told to me, piercing through me and felt like he was ripping apart my heart.

“I don’t know why you think you’re a writer.”

I just stood there completely bewildered, not knowing what to say or expecting that at all, just tears beginning to roll down before anger started to swirl inside me as he continued talking telling me how my pieces and name should be in a museum when I see mine in bookstores and libraries.

Since then I’ve been having a hard time writing and doing art, only able to hear his voice in my head on how I should be doing Art and ignore this whole side of who I am, to the point I’d just start crying and get frustrated, not able to finish what I was doing.

While this was going on I went to bed one night, feeling frustrated as my father’s words echoed in my head and not able to shut off, I eventually was able to get myself to some sleep and felt myself drift off to dream.

It started out with my dad sitting in that chair with me standing over him, yelling every word I wanted to at him for even thinking to utter those words to me on not being a writer. I took the popcorn holder for him and held it tightly in my grasp as I looked at him with fiery eyes and said the following with venom dripping in my voice. “This is mine, not yours. I can do what I want with it.”

Then I woke up.

The feeling of relief and a giant weight slipping off my chest was intense. I felt like I came to the surface and could breathe again, my Dad’s words not echoing in my head anymore, the anger I had been feeling the past couple weeks disappearing finally.

Tears rolled down my cheeks as I couldn’t help but have the biggest smile on my face, the itch I felt to create a character or write a scene for my many projects returning.

This is the best time for me to work on my writing because

I finally have the time to sit down, write and develop my characters, finally get going with writing my first draft and create my stories. With Quarantine and staying inside I can give them my complete devoted attention.

Turn on that music to get myself in the mood for the scene, nice and indie pop for a nice fluffy scene or really intense hype up music if it’s a fight or intense scene I’ll need to write. Make myself some cozy to drink or eat and just make myself comfortable in my room as I just transfer myself to their world and move on with their story.

It sometimes feels like I’m Harold with his purple crayon, drawing various things as I go on my own little adventure, creating objects, little furry friends, or making little friends places to help with the adventure with such ease.

Sometimes I just stare at the dreaded white page as my mind feels like static, switching between topics. Sometimes it was about the project I was working on or it’ll be about a little dinosaur stuck in traffic as they tried to get home from a long day's work. Munching on whatever snack I had as I spiral.

Those days I will try to focus on filling the notebook I assigned to each of these stories with notes of various things, Characters facts, and develop more rules to magic systems or schools so they're somewhere for me to follow.

But those days I’m Harold with that purple crayon, feeling the itch to write them and just be drifted off in their story are days I love and they’ve been happening more since we’re in Quarantine I guess cause I feel like I can finally work on it while the world around me is paused in certain things. But those days I cherish and make sure to indulge myself in those days to fall in the story and just be wrapped in it as I let myself be swept away as I write.

The most comfortable thing for me right now is

Indulging in the things I used to love to do as I kid or would give me joy as we’re stuck in Quarantine, stuck in the house with my family after years of having it to myself, blast music and act like an idiot as I dance around while I do chores, try to teach my dog how to dance or snuggle him while we watch something.

But now stuck in the house with everyone I have to share everything and think of everyone, like if I’m bothering my Dad or if he’s on a phone call if I go downstairs since he uses the living room as his workplace right now, or my little sister if I’m making too much noise in my room since our walls are so thin and we can hear every little thing each of us say.

So one of the few joys I have is indulging in those things, especially with having Disney+ and Netflix returning “Avatar: The Last Airbender” and getting to binge that show while eating Oreo’s in my pajamas.

Sit in front of my mirror and explore ways I can do my makeup, adding a tiny star to my cheek or making the LGBTQ+ flags on them too.

Sometimes it’s hard to escape and ignore the world right now. Death, riots, and the choices this world makes that breaks my heart and makes me feel for people who are suffering. Trying to enjoy those things like a childhood show or watch gamers on YouTube be weird and play a game doesn’t work, I’ll find myself looking at Twitter or the news to see what is happening. Or try to figure out why Twitter is “Canceling” someone and seeing how much of a horrible person they were and how they hurt the people around them in some way.

Those days I try to turn off all electronics, plug my phone and set it across the room, as I curl up in my bed as I try to read the Percy Jackson series again or finish the Grisha series. Try not to tempt myself to watch or read anything on my phone that could cause me more pain and more in that dark place in my mind again.

Or if I can turn on YouTuber’s who just have fun with their friends while they play a game or do some weird thing, distract my mind and show how there are good people in this world. Watch video after video of their content and seeing how they make me laugh or bring light to a situation, even the good of a situation too sometimes.

I’ve been grateful for these comforts and being able to indulge myself in them at these times, show the goodness in this world and that feeling of nostalgia. Make me feel like a kid again.

When I think of Dream Kid, I think of

A small child, just a chaotic ball of energy, jumping off the walls and their diet consisting of all the candies they could eat.

Maybe it’s my younger self, when I had no filter or what was good storytelling or good art. Just wanting to know what kind of fun I could get from it or let their imagination run with the images of the story or what kind of story could be told with the art piece.

Dream Kid feels like the definition of ADHD/ADD, jumping from topic to topic with the snap of their fingers, whether that be a serious essay to one second wondering what kind of fluffy love story you could write involving two cactus. One second your writing peacefully, jamming out with some music or munching on some kind of snack, than one second you find yourself being transfixed with this rainbow contraption that switches shape before you realize it’s been 5 hours and you’ve stopped writing and lost your train of thought completely and forgot where the story was going completely. Same goes with writing with Dream Kid as you jump around and run around with them as you jot down the ideas, ignoring Logic as they scream at you how wrong this is with a sentence or you used “then” or “than” wrong and need to fix it immediately.

Compared to Logic who wants it perfect now, Dream Kid is the perfect person to tap into when you're just trying to have fun and get that idea now before it moves on into the void and you lose it forever. Until that idea returns at the worst of times, like late at night when you're trying to sleep, or stuck in traffic and not able to jot down the idea on time as the cars start to finally find a steady speed and move accordingly.

There’s a saying in the art community that makes me think of Dream Kid, the perfect little sentence that’ll explain Dream Kid exactly: “You must make it ugly first before you can make it beautiful.”

Dream Kid can help you put all those ideas now, making it as ugly as you can just so you know every point you need to make before they disappear into the void again, then bring in Logic to come fix all the ugly and make it beautiful so you and the reader can know what you're trying to say.

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