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softquietsteadylove · 1 year

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For the Thenamesh Doctor AU:

Thena looses unexpectedly a patient! And the only one who she needs is our beloved Gil

"No."

"Thena."

"No!" she snarls, fighting as Kingo tries to pull her to her feet--off the patient she's been trying to get back for nearly ten minutes. "He was fine!"

"T, come on," he says gently, reaching for her again.

"Dammit," she hisses, watching the colour of her patient's skin just get worse and worse. Some hair slips into her field of vision. "Check his eyes."

Ajak obeys, kneeling down and pulling his eyelids up. Completely bloodshot and nonresponsive--it's hemorrhagic shock, for sure. Ajak gives her a look, "Thena."

"Fuck!" she leans back, arms burning, lungs ice cold. She looks at her patient, to Ajak and Kingo and a few others gathered around. She looks at the clock, "time of death, 12:37."

The crowd parts for her, in no rush to try and get in the way of her temper. She snaps her gloves off and bins them as she storms through the hallways.

He was just a man in for a scare--a little murmur in his pacemaker that made his wife worry. He was nice; they talked about how he met his wife and how to make the best grilled cheese. He was a sweet man.

Thena walks into the on-call room and throws the door closed behind her. She runs her hands over her hair, pushing back the piece that's escaped. "Out."

The door never was able to close, stopped by a foot and letting in one other person who closed it gently. "Hey."

"Out, Gil," she repeats, but it has no real bite to it. She's not very good at snapping at him for real.

He already knows, whether it's from passing it in the hallway or just by looking at her. But he walks over to her, already poised to take her into his arms, "c'mere."

Thena just barely lets him pull her against him. She's stiff, at first, still trying to hold it in. She's not exactly done her shift, and they're going to come and get her any minute, she's sure.

"I've got you," Gil whispers as he encircles her in his arms and presses his cheek to the top of her head.

Thena turns her head, letting herself bury her face in his chest. He's so warm, and so soft, and he smells more like home than her apartment ever could.

Gil whispers sweet nothings as she breaks down in his arms, pressing her sobs into his chest. He rubs her back as she trembles against him. She's been doing this for a long time, she's no stranger to what this work is like. But if she's taking it this hard, then she actually liked the guy. Poor thing.

Thena turns her head against him, just enough to breathe. Her eyes sting and she can't see shit. Her breathing is erratic and she feels like she's freezing cold. Gil wraps his hoodie around her with his hands in the pockets. "It's not fair."

"It's not."

"He came in to be cautious," she snivels, wrapping her arms around the back of him and clutching at his shirt. He's so warm. "He came in so his wife wouldn't worry--it's not fair."

"I know."

She's done trying to reason it out. It's never going to get less unfair. She sighs, letting out whatever she has left in the tank.

Gil kisses the top of her head, swaying them faintly on their feet, "I'm sorry, Thena."

She closes her eyes, trying to let Gil's heartbeat drown out reality. "I have to call his wife."

"I know." That part is always the hardest. Harder than even losing them, trying to resuscitate their poor hearts. "Let me go with you."

"No," she practically whines as she pulls away from him. Back into the cold waters of reality she goes, wrapping her arms around herself. Gil is so warm, and the usually ambient hospital feels like the tundra to her now. "I should do it alone."

"You don't have to, though."

Thena lifts her head just enough to look at him. Neither of them is a stranger to hard days. He's also had his days when he wonders what they could have done differently--a single step they could have taken that would have kept someone alive.

"Hey," he whispers, leaning down and pressing a kiss at the corner of her lips. "I'm here if you need me."

She nods. She can't say anything now--talking requires thinking, and she needs all her autopilot skills to get through the rest of the next five hours.

Gil gives her shoulder one last squeeze before heading out into the hall. "Uh... "

The chill she was feeling sinks even deeper into her bones. Thena walks to his side, having already guessed what he was seeing.

The patient's wife is here, holding a sandwich and a bottle of water and weeping. This couldn't get worse. Thena squeezes past Gil and walks toward the poor woman, refusing to perceive the tears in her eyes. "Missus Langford?"

"Wh-Where's-"

"Why don't we sit down?"

Thena looks up as Gil guides the woman towards the far corner of the waiting area. It's not ideal, but they don't want her on her feet when she gets the news. She should have known he wasn't going to let her do this alone.

"Is everything okay?" the poor woman looks between them desperately.

Thena tries to get it out--she really does. But the woman takes one look at her face and crumbles into tears. "I-I'm so sorry, Missus Langford. Y-Your husband...he suffered a blood clot. He-"

"No," the woman sobs, her face contorting as grief takes her in its arms. "No, please!"

Thena's throat clamps tight. The smell of the homemade grilled cheese reaches her nose and she wants to throw up.

Gil leans over from his seat on the other side of her, "I'm sorry, Missus Langford. We did all we could, but I'm afraid...your husband passed very quickly."

"No!"

Thena turns away as Gil rubs the poor woman's arm. He's the better person for the job, anyway. She's not that good at comforting people. He looks at her and she swipes her tears away. The families can never see you break--if you can get a single thing right, it's don't let them see you break. She sniffles, "he was a very sweet man, Missus Langford. He told me all about you."

"H-He did?"

Thena nods, blinking through more tears, letting them obscure her vision of the older woman. "I got to talk with him during his examination. He told me about how you met at the movies."

The woman just starts crying even harder. Thena flinches but when she looks at Gil he nods for her to keep going. She shakes her head abut he nods even harder. She sighs; he's the comforting expert.

"H-He, um, told me about using mayo for grilled cheeses," Thena mumbles, trying to ignore the wax wrapped sandwich in the woman's lap.

"They-" she sniffles and laughs all at once, "they were his favourite."

Thena manages a smile and nods at the woman.

"I, um," Missus Langford presses her palms to her eyes and collects her purse. "I-I have to call-"

"Take all the time you need," Gil assures the woman in one fell swoop, still holding her shoulder and placing his other hand on her wrist. "I can show you to him, and the hospital will help you make arrangements, okay?"

"O-Okay," she nods as Gil guides her gently to her feet. She holds up the sandwich and water, "um-"

"It's okay," Gil smiles, gently patting her hands to deposit them back in her purse. "You'll need your strength. You should hold onto them."

Thena walks behind them, happy to fall into the background of things. Her feet squeak and drag as they guide the woman to her husband. "Missus Langford, if you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask, okay?"

The sweet woman nods at her, fresh tears coming into her eyes. They rise in Thena's as well, but the woman shakes her head. "You go, dear. I know you did everything you could for him."

Thena really feels like she could throw up.

"Someone will come in to ask how you want to proceed, Missus Langford," Gil steps in again, with that soft voice of his. "No one will rush you."

She nods her thanks to them again before moving to her husband's side behind the curtain. It happened so suddenly they don't even have a private room for her to do her grieving.

Gil plants his hand on Thena's shoulder as they walk away. "Hey."

She nods, swiping at her tears yet again. She doesn't think she'll ever be able to eat a grilled cheese sandwich again. She looks up as Gil threads her arms through his hoodie. It's nice and warm, at least. "You'll need it."

"I'm warm enough." He certainly is. He zips it up and even rolls the sleeves up for her. It's not exactly professional, but no one is going to dare to tell her that. "This poor old thing--might be time for a new one."

Thena subconsciously clings to it at the thought.

Gil kisses her forehead. "This one's all yours, baby."

She sighs. They have work to do. Mister Langford is going to be one of many patients tonight. And it's her job to make sure there are no more Missus Langfords so long as she can help it. "Thanks."

He nuzzles her cheek and kisses her temple, "always."

"See you after?" she asks in a small voice, her hand trailing against his until their fingers are clinging to each other.

He gives her a smile that helps her fight the insufferable cold of the night, "I'll find you."

He always does.

#Thenamesh Doctor AU #the aNGST #who's ready for suffering :)#this is bound to happen #it comes with the job after all #and they both know that #of course Gil knows when Thena takes losing a patient extra hard #he's very in tune with his wife #Thena sees out the rest of her shift wearing Gil's hoodie #she does this every once in a while and everyone knows that it's a comfort for her #no one is going to deny her that #Gil does put in for a new uniform hoodie #then Thena will have two hoodies of his to steal #She'll wear the current one at home or keep it as a little blanket for herself for on-call naps #but Gil will still give her his new one if it's cold or if they're in the field #but hey #that's work-marriage

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victorluvsalice · 4 months

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Valicer Not-Incorrect Quotes, Meet The Family Edition Volume II: Van Dort Visit

Victor: [knocking on the door to Smiler's apartment, fidgeting anxiously] S-smiler? Are -- are you ready to go?

Smiler: [from the other side of the door] Yeah, just a second!

Smiler: [opens the door to reveal that they're wearing -- a plain black suit, white shirt, and black tie]

Victor:

Smiler: ...you okay?

Victor: [blinking and shaking his head] Yes! I-I just -- didn't expect -- [gestures to the outfit] I d-didn't think you owned -- d-don't get me wrong, it is p-probably perfect for visiting Burtonsville and m-meeting my parents, it's only...it looks d-downright funereal.

Smiler: [really awkward smile] Ah -- there's a reason for that...

[Context: the trio are being driven by the Van Dorts' chauffeur through the streets of Burtonsville to the Van Dort mansion]

Smiler: [takes a picture of the town and sends it to their friends]

Thirteen: [texting back] Ha ha. Take one without the black-and-white-filter, will you?

Galactica: [texting back] Yeah, be fair, Smiler.

Smiler: [a minute later, texts a picture of themselves and Alice in front of the window, showing that they're in full color]

Galactica: [texting back] WTF???

Thirteen: [texting back] HOLY SHIT HE ACTUALLY LIVES IN A TIM BURTON MOVIE?!

[Context: at the mansion, Victor is showing Alice and Smiler around]

Smiler: [staring down another hallway] Sheesh, how many rooms does this place have?

Victor: I'm honestly not sure. More than we could ever need, that's for certain. [rolls his eyes] Have to have room for all of Mother's "treasures..."

Alice: Yes, your mother in particular does seem to be into the conspicuous consumption. [small smile] At least you don't have a gold toilet?

[smash cut to:]

Alice: [staring at a literal gold toilet] Oh my fucking god.

Smiler: [also staring] Is it -- can you --

Victor: Of course not -- do you think my mother would ever allow anyone to befoul her beloved toilet?

Smiler: Rita is going to kill your parents if she ever meets them.

Victor: Please tell her to do so in a way that allows me a proper alibi.

[Context: Nell is holding court at tea and complaining about "this modern world"]

Nell: People just don't know their place anymore! Why, just a little while ago, I had the displeasure of dealing with the rudest, most incompetent barista I've ever met!

Victor: [not really paying attention anymore] Did you?

Nell: Yes! Cheeky little bugger didn't seem to understand anything about his job! All I wanted was a few little extras -- the sort a customer is entitled to -- and he couldn't even pour the coffee right!

Victor: [sudden horrified realization] Uh --

Alice: [calmly sipping her tea] That must have been terrible for you.

Smiler: [nodding] I bet you didn't even leave a tip.

Nell: Oh, we never leave tips anyway -- we don't believe in them, isn't that right, William? [William gets half a nod in before she continues] But we paid good money for that coffee, and I expected it to be done right! Not by some half-wit with dyed hair rolling his colored contacts at me!

Smiler: [completely deadpan] How dare they.

Victor: [muttering] Still drank the entire thing, though.

Nell: Not the point! [shaking her head as she returns to her own tea] At least you're not spending all your time with those sorts, Victor. If I knew you were carrying on with a barista I'd die of shame.

Alice: [under her breath] Can we have that in writing?

Victor: [trying very hard not to laugh]

Victor: [deep sigh as they all climb in the Van Dort's car to go home] Thank you both for putting up with that.

Alice: It's fine, Victor. They are your parents, and we were going to have to do that eventually.

Victor: I know, just -- I'm sorry. About them. They're -- a-a lot, I know.

Alice: [squeezing his forearm] I imagine you do, yes.

Smiler: Yeah, really. [pause] So, how do you think it's going to take before she finally realizes who I am and dies of shame?

Victor: Considering how much attention she pays to "servants" -- the heat death of the universe.

Alice: I don't think I can wait that long.

Victor: Please don't murder my mother.

Smiler: Yeah, Rita already has dibs.

#valicer #not incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #victor van dort #alice liddell #smiler alton #misgendering #(very slight but Nell naturally didn't pay attention to any pronouns used for Smiler in the initial coffee visit #so she has defaulted to talking about them as 'he' when describing the incident)#been wanting to do this follow-up to the 'meet the family' edition for a while #especially the one where Smiler takes the picture and everyone thinks they're using a filter at first #'OMG HE ACTUALLY LIVES IN A TIM BURTON MOVIE?' has been in my head for a while XD #yes Smiler DOES have one plain suit they bought for a funeral #came in handy here XD #though in the full scene in my mind Victor is then like 'but I don't want you not to be YOU just for my parents'#and it's a little more heartfelt and sad as Smiler assures him that they're fine toning themselves down for one visit #though they still do wear their yellow contacts #(they briefly thought about going without them but decided 'nah that IS too much toning down')#and come on tell me the Van Dorts WOULDN'T have a gold toilet just to show off #it's probably shaped like a fish or something XD #and naturally I had to do a scene of Nell just straight up not recognizing Smiler #because all baristas blur together in her head #she MIGHT recognize them at a later date #we'll see if I come up with anything for that :p #queued

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pansyfemme · 11 months

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i was at a show last night for a band that’s been a staple of my city for like. 30 years? theyre the ones who played at my parents wedding and shit. but it was odd bc like. it was the most. like. my parent’s scene inside of my city show ever like. oh my goddddd.. like i mentioned before that my parents are well known where i live but like. im talking like. 30 years ago so like. everyone is like 55-70 in this crowd and i havent seen any of them since i was little. ppl were coming up to me like omg hi!! i used 2 babysit u/cut ur hair/etc and it was like. hi. i um. i transitioned. you may have heard about that. yeah my sister? well um. um. would you believe if the same thing happened to him.

#so. heres my description. the show was inside a video rental store that is beloved by the community #they have a small coffee bar so i got a lavender lemonade #the only ppl my age were the children of one of the guys in the band #also artists.#everyone knows everyone. even i know everyone #theres one dude who is famous for setting up an easel in clubs and painting with no hesitation. he did not do that but he brought a painting #to display during the show. he did tai chi in the corner during the show (which was a rock band.) while his girlfriend- who i’ve known since #i was very small bc she used to run events at the local bookstore- who is dressed very goth is crocheting and not paying attention to him #another guy famous for dancing at shows (often wearing a carrot costume.) was there. he was wearing a colorful blouse that was very ripped #and two pairs of glasses he glued together so one is upside down and the other is rightside up. he dances. intrestingly. and he was filming #himself. not the band. himself. the whole time. He brought a friend who was not wearing shoes. (it was pouring rain outside? and this venue #is literally not somewhere comfortable to walk on barefoot?) who tried to dance but wasnt very good so he kept lookin at the carrot guy for #help. pretty much everyone in the room got a shout out. ppl who havent seen me in years recognized me for some reason #god it was. tiring #we went with my dad’s best friend. who has the same name as my mother so ppl. still seem to confuse them lmao #esp bc my mom doesnt like to go to as many things to its often. my dads best friend my dad and me. which does look like a family ig

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wiiwarechronicles · 2 years

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Eret gives yogurt a smooch on the forehead and yogurt has to walk around for like a week with a big lipstick mark on his face

#you cannot kiss the anthro hybrids while wearing makeup otherwise it stains their fur for a while #h still does it because he’s annoying but Eret accidentally does it once and feels so guilty she ops to carrying makeup wipes with her #maidsmess

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crowsyart · 2 years

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Now onto some sillies :)

#Liz thompson #patty thompson #death the kid #beastars au #soul eater au #soul eater #anthro au #patty likes to gnaw on kids antlers after he sheds them and he doesn’t really care as long as she does both #the sisters have different howls and while they don’t do it as much because they dont really need to communicate over a distance or scare #it’s still fun sometimes #kid picks up on it #and while his is pretty weak he’s doing his best #they do start using it for longer distance communication eventually in certain situations #Liz feels weird about chewing on kids discarded antlers so she doesn’t usually #they both have to pull them off though when he’s shedding or he’ll weep cause they come off unevenly #the first time crona saw kid bleeding on his head without his antlers they jumped a mile #everyone else is pretty used to it #crona thinks soul is gonna shed his too eventually and Maka’s like um he and souls like what maka. mad cause my horns are gonna fall off #he just likes bothering maka #general continuation of the last one they wear clothes that show their bellies as a power thing like #I’m showing my soft underbelly but I’m not submitting #I’m not scared of you type of thing

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dirt-str1der · 2 years

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Sagawa is unfuckable in my head but in my heart he and nishitani had something embarrassing going on

#Listen to my problems #actually i transsexualise characters in yakuza based on one simple rule: if majima wants to hit then its a 65% that the guy is trans (if he #DESPERATELY wants to hit then its a 100% chance the guy is trans) the percentage rule doesnt apply to girls because majima doesnt believe #in unattractive girls (and shes right)#i will never date an ugly girl. why ? because ugly girls dont exist #let me get to the heart of my post anyway . i was randomly assigning cooler genders to yaluza characters when i actually looked at my list #and was like ... this ... this is !!!! majimas fuckit list !!! and theres already two dead guys on it. too ass #ill make it clearer actually sagawa being majimas handler does act a bit possessive and intimate towards him but he holds zero desire in his #heart for the poor boy even if he had to handfeed him for a while and it was super sad but majima on the other hand absolutely cannot #control where his dick compass swings and starts lusting after the guy more than twice his age plus he just got ‘rescued’ by sagawa <- its #just a simple passing of the leash from shimano to sagawa though and majima Knows this logically that hes completely forgotten how to act li #ke a human being and this is really dumb and he really shouldnt but hes extremely susceptible to his wild imagination and nightmares combo w #here hes trapped in a maze of his own libidio and trauma and against his will sagawa gets his sex engine roaring even though he hates the gu #y and thinks he sucks and it Really doesnt help that sagawa knows and lets majima know hes politely pretending hes not getting hard #stop reading btw im going to start talking about my creature of the night au wh actully no im not actually yes i am #but since majima goes wolfmode every full moon and he though his memories are foggy he can still Remember. and sagawa fucking loves animals #and a wolf is no different he really has a soft spot for wolfjima and spoils him a bit and majima gets trained against his will and itswired #deep enough to bleed over into his subconscious even when hes human and can remember that he hates sagawa but its hard to actually... hurt #him especially since in this au majima fucking bit him and sagawa let it slide. like he nearly got his arm torn off and had to wear a cast #for months and he never once blamed majima for it (soft spot strikes again) despite everything and despite how awful he is majima kind of #realises that sagawa (in his own way) is acting with majimas ‘best interests’ in mind <- extremely subjective statement #the thing is that he really respects him for that and trusts him not to pull the trigger on him when he doesnt ‘deserve’ it

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ecoamerica · 21 days

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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figtreeandvine · 5 months

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I want to write a movie that is sort of the flip side of a Hallmark holiday movie. Not an anti-Hallmark movie, just like the other side of the same coin.

It starts with a well-dressed professional woman driving a convertible along a country road, autumn foliage in the background, terribly scenic. She turns onto a dirt road/long driveway, and stops next to a field of Christmas trees, all growing in neat, ordered rows, perfectly trimmed and pruned to form. She steps out of the car--no, she's not wearing high-heels, give her some sense!--and knocks on the door of a worn but nice-looking farmhouse. An older woman, late fifties maybe, answers the door, looking a bit puzzled. The younger woman asks if she can buy a Christmas tree now, today. The older woman says they don't do retail sales--and the younger woman breaks down crying.

Cut to the two women sitting at the kitchen table with cups of tea. The young woman (Michelle), no longer actively crying, explains that her mother loves Christmas more than anything, but is in the hospital with end-stage cancer. Her doctors don't think she'll live to see December, let alone Christmas. Nobody is selling Christmas trees in September, so could the older woman please make an exception, just this once? The older woman (Helen) regretfully explains that they have a contract to sell their trees that forbids outside sales. The younger woman nods, starts to stand up, but the older woman stops her with a hand and asks her what hospital her mother is in. After she answers the older woman says that "my Joe" will deliver a tree the next day. "Contract says I can't sell you a tree, but nothing says I can't give you one."

Next day "Joe" shows up at the hospital in flannel and jeans, with a smallish tree over her shoulder. Oh, whoops, that's Jo, Helen's daughter, short for Joanna, not Joe. Jo sets up the tree and even pulls out a box of lights and ornaments. Mother watches from hospital bed with a big smile as Jo and Michelle decorate the tree. Cue "end of movie" type sappiness as nurses and other patients gather in the doorway, smiling at the tree.

Cut to Michelle sitting in her dark apartment, clutching a mug of tea, staring out at the falling snow and the Christmas lights outside. Her apartment has no tree, no decorations, nothing. She starts at a knock on the door, goes to open it. Jo is standing there, again holding a tree over her shoulder.

Plot develops: the second tree is a gift, because Michelle might as well get it as the bank. The contract for the tree sales was an /option/ contract, which prevents them from selling to anyone else, but doesn't guarantee the sale. The corporation with the option isn't going to buy the trees, but Helen and Jo can't sell them anywhere else, and basically they get nothing. They'll lose the farm without the year's income. Michelle asks to see the contract and Jo promises to email it to her.

Next day at a very upscale law firm, Michelle asks at the end of a staff meeting if anyone in contract law still needs pro bono hours for the year. No one does, but a senior partner (Abe) takes her to his office and asks about it. She says the contract looks hinky to her ("Is that a legal term?" "Yes.") but contract law's not her thing. He raises an eyebrow and she grins and pulls a sheaf of paper out of her bag and hands it over. He reads it over, then looks up at her. "They signed this?"

More plot develops. Abe calls in underlings--interns, paralegals, whatever--and the contract is examined, dissected, and ultimately shredded (metaphorically). It's worse even than it looks--on January 1st Helen and Jo will have to repay the advanced they received at signing. The corporation has bought up a suspicious number of Christmas tree farms in previous years after foreclosure, etc.

Cut to Abe explaining all this to Helen and Jo while sitting with them and Michelle in a very swanky conference room. The firm is willing to take on the case pro bono, hopefully as a class's action suit for other farmers trapped by the contract--but there's no way it can go to court before January. Which will be too late to save the farm's income for the year. They might get enough in damages to tide them over, but….

After Michelle sees Helen and Jo out, she comes back and asks Abe if there's anything they can do immediately. Abe looks thoughtful for a long moment, then gets a really shark-like grin on his face. "Maybe…."

Cut to Helen wearing a bathrobe, coming into her kitchen in the morning. She looks out the window…and there's a food truck stopped in her driveway. She pulls a coat on over her robe and goes out--two more trucks have pulled up while she does this. Driver of the first truck asks her where they park. Another truck pulls up behind the others. Behind that is a black BMW--Abe rolls down the window and waves. Helen directs the trucks to the empty field/yard next to the house. Abe pulls up next to Helen's car and Jo's truck and parks. He and Michelle get out--Abe wearing a total power suit, Michelle in weekend casual.

The case will be easier if the corporation initially sues them for violating the (uninforcible!) contract, rather than them suing to corporation (damn if I know, but it's movie logic). So they're going to sell the trees now, and rounded up some food trucks and whatnot to draw people in.

Cue montage of Jo and Michelle running around helping people set up while Abe and Helen watch from the kitchen table. The table starts out covered in file folders…and slowly gains coffee cups and plates of cinnamon rolls. It becomes increasingly clear here that Abe and Helen are becoming as close as Jo and Michelle.

Everything gets set up and a very urban, very motley crowd appears--tats and studs and multiracial couples and LGBTQ parents and everything--and everyone is having a wonderful time eating funnel cake and choosing their tree so Jo and a bunch of rainbow-haired elves can cut it for them. At which point someone shows up from the corporation (maybe with a sheriff's deputy?) and starts yelling at Helen, who's running checkout. And suddenly Abe appears from the house and you realize why he's wearing that suit on a Saturday….

Cue confrontation and corporate flunky running off with their tail between their legs, blustering about suing. Cue Jo kissing Michelle. Cue Helen walking over and putting a hand on Abe's shoulder and smiling at her.

I want the lawyers to be the heroes because they are lawyers and know the law. I want a lesbian who lives in the country with her mother. I want urbanites to turn out as a community to help someone who isn't even part of their community. I want Michelle to keep working at her high-power job, loving Christmas and grieving her mother.

#hallmark #anti-hallmark #movie plot

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polaraffect · 17 days

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venting in the tags yippeee

#damien.txt #gender talk time 🤪✌️#....................................................................................#screaming crying throwing up rolling around on the ground <- said completely deadpan #uhm. as always. thinking abt gender. and questioning. my whole life. bc. i cant stop doing that #soooooo like. my big thing. abt gender. is as much as im like. he/they-ing it here and irl. its kind of... complicated?#as ive gone on ive realized more and more that i dont. really. feeling Anything towards those pronouns #neither do i she/her. or they/them.#and just generally the whole Concepts of male/female? so like. im always like hmm. whats happening here #and other completely incoherent statements djbdhdbf sorrry anyways #i keep having these moments where im like. hmm. maybe. im leaning too hard into the masc. maybe i am not. he at all.#but ive like. really full committed to the bit yknow? like esp irl. all the ppl ive introduced myself to in the last 2 years have known me #as 'he'. and as someone who wears mostly masc clothing and generally attempts to present masc #and like. i bought a skirt a while ago and i was trying it on today and i was like oh. wait.#and before u @ me i KNOW!! clothing does not equal gender!! but there was just something abt it #and recently (the past like. year lmao) ive really been contemplating like. what i actually want out of transitioning or whatever #bc like. increasingly its become more obvious how... fucking difficult that is.#and the more i think abt it the more im like. bro its not even worth it for me? tbh? also like. sometimes i look in the mirror and am like #hmm. this does not feel better than it did when i hadnt transitioned at all. yknow?#like the last 10+ years ive been existing in this state w my body where im basically just. tolerating it. ignoring it. even.#and that hasn't... changed. after t. and ik thats not like the fix-all but its got me wondering if some of it/a lot of it #is just body dysmorphia? rather than dysphoria? bc like. god knows i have that too.#and just. idk. i feel Really Really anti-gender most of the time. would in fact. not like to be conceived of at all.#but on some level im trying to think abt it practically bc if that ^ is my thoughts on gender fr. i have to decide whats worth it #and like. i miss cool clothes. god men's clothing is so fucking boring. holy fuck.#and AGAIN i KNOW gender doesnt equal clothes but also like. i am Aware to the wider world it still works like that #and truly if i rocked up to work/class in a skirt everyone would be like What The Fuck #and i kind of want to!! but im also scared of that reaction lol #AHHHH why must gender be so complicated. i want to lay on the floor #lol there was literally more but i ran out of tags LMAOO sorry everyone. gender complicated. peace ✌️

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inupibaldspot · 2 months

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Back off,kid.

Pairing : Gojo Satoru x Reader

Note ₊˚⊹♡ : (Teen)Gojo is jealous over (kid) Fushiguro having a crush on you.

Fushiguro Megumi always wonders if he made the right choice every time a white-haired sunglass wearing teenager walks into the house.

The tall older boy would grin as his hands form a salute. “You doing good Megumi and Tsumiki?”

He was as useful as the indoor plants. Fushiguro thought.

Gojo wasn’t much good at cooking and neither helped with cleaning, probably because of his rich background—but he did spoil them with lots of food and pocket money but he wouldn’t ever admit that.

As much as Fushiguro would love to throw insults at Gojo, he holds back his tongue each time; Tsumiki would send sharp glare and nag him if he did.

The first friend he brought to visit them was a girl; it was after Gojo went missing for a while and when Tsumiki inquired about it ,he simply said one of his dear friend went cray-cray as his finger twirls at the temple of his head.

The girl had short, brown hair with a distinct smell of cigarette; her name was Shoko Ieiri. She wore an impressed look when she entered the house as she looked over to Gojo. “Heh— The place is pretty neat,Gojo.”

Fushiguro looked to Gojo who placed some groceries on the counter top with a proud smile on his face. “I know right!” Gojo replies.

The young boy frowns. “It’s Tsumiki who keeps the place clean.” Shoko gives Gojo a stare before she cackles.

A week later when Tsumiki was still in school with club activities, another person makes an appearance ,you. He could faintly hear conversations between you and Gojo through the front door on how you’d actually wanted to visit them sooner but was bombarded with mission before it swings open.

The first thing Fushiguro noticed was how Gojo seemed to make you enter first— other times he barges in without a care for Shoko— his hands near your back with a slight space, without touching it. Why was Gojo being nice?

You blink at the dark haired boy. “Fushiguro Megumi, right?” Gojo peers from behind as you smile. “Did you eat?”

“Not yet. Waiting for Tsumiki to get home.” Fushiguro thinks you’re the first person who is kind of decent.

You nod take plastic bag from Gojo’s hands and lift up it, your smile widen. “I’ll make you some good stuff then.”

“I want to eat your cooking too,y/n.” Gojo chirps in only to be ignored. And to your credit, it was actually good. He didn’t remember the last time he had something this good home made.

After that, your visits seemed to increase which Fushiguro Megumi did not mind, in fact he was getting fond of your presence. You helped with food, cleaning which lessened the load on Tsumiki plus you also helped him with his studies.

“You seemed to get it now, Megumi.” Poor kid, blushes a bit hearing your compliment. “Practice this set of questions and I think you’ll do pretty well on your tests.” You smile.

Fushiguro nods as he does as you say, face still heated up. He looks up at you, who was reading a book. Your hair slightly in your face, lips slightly parted with eyes focused. You were extremely beautiful and as much as he wouldn’t admit it , he had a big fat kid crush on you.

“Megumi-chan.” Suddenly he is shoved to the side as a body makes way in between you and him. It was Gojo who sat in between. “Move over~ This seat is mine.”

The boy frowns and so did you, not liking Gojo’s action. “Don’t interrupt the kid, who is studying.” Kid? Ouch…You huff as your move over, despite you complaining you make space for him, focus back on your book.

Fushiguro watched as Gojo leans closer to you, almost resting his head on your neck as he looked over to your book; after a while eyes slowly moved over to you, his expression softens.

Gojo smiles as he tugs a piece of hair behind your hair, to which you don’t react as if it was normal. Thee older man then turns his head to Fushiguro—oops,he got caught staring.

The white haired boy then grins, a condescending one in fact as he mouths out the following words.

‘y/n-is-mine.” Fushiguro huffs. ‘back-off.”

·:*¨༺ Part 2༻¨*:·

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