#hayden would be an awesome pick
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It's Revenge of the Ask time 😘 the crackhead one, you know which one I mean 🤣 I humbly request 6, 10, 11, 12, 17, 22
Oh boy… 🤣 I know you pick some hard ones on purpose since I tortured you with a bunch so let’s see how I do!
6. What is your favorite Star Wars meme?
Like Hayden Christensen I enjoy the Anakin and Padme memes where Anakin says the most unhinged or ridiculous thing and Padme is just praying what he’s saying is a joke and we all know Anakin never jokes.
10. If you could pull a George Lucas and sneak into Disney+ and edit any Star Wars scene, what changes would you make?
I would input Barriss Offee everywhere until Feloni and the gang have no choice but to address her story. Just kidding (slightly), I would input all the deleted Jedi scenes (like the Mirialans tandem fighting) during the Battle of Geonosis in Episode so we can see all the awesome background Jedi fighting instead of exclusively Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Padme mostly.
11. Who would you want as a Jedi Master? (Why)
As much as I love Luminara, Mace, etc, we don’t really get to see them in the teaching role very much so it’s hard to gauge so I would have to go with Obi-Wan on this one. Obi-Wan undergoes through so much pain and trauma in his life yet he always stays in the light and bounces back and as someone whose also had a pretty traumatic life I would benefit immensely from a Jedi Master who could completely get me and guide me on the right path. Not to mention he’s incredibly kind, noble, smart, patient, and witty which are traits I greatly admire in someone.
12. What lightsaber form would you master?
Form 3 Soresu which is the lightsaber my most favorite characters in Star Wars use and I’d be living that Jedi truth of only drawing my lightsaber in defense and not attack so that would be my preferred fighting stance.
17. Pick one Star Wars line to describe your life, what would it be?
“It takes strength to embrace the Dark Side. Only the weak embrace it.”
-Obi-Wan Kenobi
Again I’ve had a very traumatic and depressing life pre-marriage that I still struggle with to this day and possibly for the rest of my life and there have been many times where just being a bad person or unaliving myself were very tempting options for me, but time and time again I chose to resist it as hard as it has been. So Obi-WAN’s quote to Maul here resonates deeply with me. It does take strength to confront your pain and challenges head on and stay in the light because it is so much easier to not be.
22. Ask your own slightly unhinged question here! The question I was given; which two characters would fight each other to the death only to end up in the most intense lovemaking?
Cal Kestis and Trilla Sunduri for sure and if you’ve played the game or seen the Fallen Order cut scenes then you would definitely know why this doesn’t need further explaining.
Original Ask Questions
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I'm finally enjoying Ahsoka!
This recent episode really did it for me, not sure why. If it had not I wouldn't have enjoyed the ending reveal.
Some thoughts...
- I really ship Lil Blondey with Sabine. Maybe it's because their combined eyeshadow game could take over the galaxy. Maybe it's just how queer-coded Live Action Sabine feels to me. Maybe it's because the red bladed baddie chased the gun shooting goody through a forest and in my mind that's where the best SW romances start
- Hera Syndulla continuing her habit of bringing children into space battles. 10/10 Space Mom.
- I enjoy the emphasis on Sabine and Ezra as siblings. No shade to my lovely Sabezra shipping pals, but he always felt to me like her annoying little brother that she'd do anything for.
- the map is serving so much KOTOR. Anything that has KOTOR vibes makes me happy. I don't even care that it's a map quest, I just love the aesthetic very much.
- if anything bad happens to a single green hair on my little petal Jacen's head there will be hell to pay. I love him. Not as much as I love Grogu and loth cats but I love him. I want to ruffle his green mop.
- 'mom... I have a bad feeling...' said with such earnestness, omg, my sweet boy. I'm sad Kanan never met him.
- Rosario seems to have finally found her rhythm with the character. When she picks up the map ball gadget and lets out a cry, it sounds more like emotional anguish than pain. It feels like a reaction to the mention of Anakin, and I enjoyed this choice very much.
- Lil Blondey saying 'you have no power' to Sabine before Sabine clocks her one with a Mando dart is awesome. 'No power? Really? Try MY ENTIRE CULTURAL HERITAGE for power!!'
- Ahsoka fucking up on Sabine during the Night of a Thousand Tears is also a great development. Feels right. Not sure why.
- The World Between Worlds looks very beautiful in live action. It would look even more beautiful on a cinema screen with a confused dark-haired man waking up there to be told by the ghosts of his ancestors that he has to go back to the realm of the living, JUST SAYING.
- Hayden keeps getting better looking as he gets older, so the de-ageing is a bit whatever, but OMG THERE HE IS. HAYDEN AS ANAKIN. I don't fancy him, I never did, but I have such intense affection for his face. Seeing Hayden age is like seeing Anakin age the way he might have if not for Palpatine, which is why I'm kinda meh on running him through the computers to smooth him out. But I also really love his voice, I always did, I just feel such love for the slight hint of Canada in the second vowel sound of Ahsoka's name when he says it. I am delighted that Hayden is getting to do more with his character than his oft-mocked work in the PT.
- Seeing Anakin in the WBW just makes me wish he was in TROS.
- CARSON TEVA IS HERE. Idk why, maybe it's just he has such a kind face and amiable demeanor but I'm always pleased to see him.
- I'm still kinda sad that the show is suggesting that Sabine doesn't see Hera as her family. Hera half raised Sabine. Her attitude of 'Guess I'm just adopting two teenagers and a furry purple dude' is just very inspirational to me as somebody who doesn't want to biologically reproduce or do parenthood in a traditional way, and I would really like to see Hera's open-hearted and loving nature get the respect it deserves.
-I'm glad we haven't gotten Thrawn at all. You know why? I don't actually care about him. I have no attachment to the old EU, and I have never rated my Star Wars based on how 'awesome' or 'badass' it is, because I don't have a penis for a brain. When he does show up it will have maximum impact and I appreciate this.
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Do you think keeping Joey means saying goodbye to Driedger (or did you mean Gibson)? I know Driedgs has a big contract but I wonder if Joey will come up to the Kraken, Driedgs anchors CV, and it’s Jonesy who takes a contract elsewhere (equally heartbreaking for me, I love Martin Jones so much, but feel like I’ve been preparing for that for longer)….
Martin Jones was signed for one year specifically to replace an injured Driedger. A lot of us wanted to see Joey get the call-up, but Jones had a much stronger background in NHL games played, so I'm not surprised we went that way. I can't imagine we'll see him back, but I'd be surprised if he doesn't get another gig elsewhere! If I had to take a guess, I'd say maybe Anaheim. Maybe Winnipeg, if they move Hellebuyck.
As for Driedger, yes, I think Joey's contract means Driedgs is going, and for the sake of the cap. probably sooner rather than later. If we stash him in the minors, we're using $3,375,000 of our big league cap on him for one year (saving $1,125,000); if we buy him out, it's $3,000,000 for two years (saving $1,500,000); if we can get someone to trade for him, then if we retain max salary on him, we spend $2,250,000 (saving $2,250,000), and it could theoretically be less. But the fact that no one picked him up when we put him on waivers last year-- and he hasn't really shown anything since then, not his fault, but Joey was on FIRE-- means quite possibly no one wants to take a swing on him. 🥺 He's the kind of candidate who screams "future considerations" to me, and that's very sad and I don't like it one bit, but that's as much as two fourth-liners' salaries... $2,250,000 last year would have paid for Sprong, Borgen, and half of Froeden or Hayden, say. Or allowed us to pay for another UFA who had potential.
I think Driedger is awesome and would be a great 1A/1B goaltender. Grant Fuhr thought he looked good physically and just needed to get more playing time to get back to full speed. I would love to see him get a real chance at a full time job somewhere in the NHL. I will miss him immensely!
Meanwhile, the Coachella Valley fanbase will be DEVASTATED to lose Joey, even though it's a great opportunity for him. 🥺 But after his spectacular playoff performance, and EFFING JEFF MAREK pointing it out on his dumb show, THANKS MAREK, you big butthead, there is absolutely no way Joey would clear waivers to go back to CV. I don't want to lose him, and he's 3 years younger and way, way cheaper than Driedger. Plus he is absolutely getting a goalie goal in the NHL someday, just you wait. (At the cost of a few "IYAGTTG" moments, but such is life for a puckhandling goaltender.)
Last year I was ready to drive to KCI daily and hold a boombox over my head with a sign that said "RE-SIGN DONATO", and this year I'm not nearly as attached to him. I'm bereft at the thought of losing Geekie, but I've been saying for a full season that we won't be able to keep Sprong at a salary we'll pay for him. But who WILL we end up with?? Will Shane make the team for real? Surely Kartye is a lock! What about Kole Lind?? I think this year I am much, much more zen about roster changes. (Though I do snarl like a vampire exposed to sunlight every time Eliot Friedman suggests Shane Wright is in play for some deal. BACK THE FUCK OFF, FRIEDGE. HE IS NOT GOING ANYWHERE. OUR SHANE. OUR PRECIOUSSSSSS.)
All that to say: tomorrow may be a big news day for us. And we better lock down Dunn!
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Swynrpwrimo 2023 - Task #30 - part 2
SWYNRP Character Wishlist: A list of 10+ characters you’d like to see in the RP - Characters Mak wants to play edition
I need y’all to pick some of these characters up before I do pls
[tracker]
1. Lyria from Tinkerbell Fairies franchise with a Jodie Whittaker FC
So my idea for her is nothing like her skeleton but!!!! I love it so much!!!! Her app has been DONE for over two years!!!! I just need to find the right time get her.
2. Aphrodite from Hercules with an Anitta FC
So honestly this character is so well formed in my head. She’s from Avalor (our first Lusophone Avaloran, the rest are primarily Spanish-speakers), she was a Pachamama rebel fighter against the dictatorship before coming to Swynlake, and before the civil war was an actress and pop star! Her name is legit Afrodite bc that’s the Portuguese spelling of Aphrodite. I just wanna iron out a few things in her story before I get her.
3. Imelda Rivera from Coco possibly with a Coty Camacho FC
But I’d really want a Hector if I did so. But UGH I have an idea for herrrrr. She’s honestly such a Mak character
4. Vee Hauntley with a Chloe Hayden FC
And if I HC Vee is my immortal autistic honey like this awesome gorgeous smiley autistic FC? What of it?
5. Fairy Gary possible FCs include: Gao Weiguang, Ryan Gosling, Omar Metwally, , Ian Anthony Dale, Michiel Huisman
I think this would be SUCH a neat opportunity to play with the fairy lore we have regarding the family and how the one big family no-no is having children outside of your Promise. But I'd LOVE to play him with the character who is his illegitimate half-fairy half-human child around, and potentially with a character that's either his Actual wife and/or one that's his legitimate child bc THE DRAMAAAAA Y'ALL. Can be any characters already fairies or we can make characters fairies that aren't already! So if aaaaaanybody is at all interested in this plot, hit me up!!! Let's plot it!
6. Lady Rebekah Alhadeff from Elena of Avalor with a Joséphine Jobert FC
Look. I’m just a slut for Avalor, okay.
7. Rama from The Jungle Book with a Sendhil Ramamurthy FC or a Sidharth Malhotra FC depending on how old I made him
Okay so those of y’all around forever ago may remember when Kiara was here, I had Rama and Raksha with her. But tbh…I feel like that time around I came in at the middle of their story and I’d LOVE to take another crack at them from the start with someone! As either Rama OR Raksha! So I’m giving my top FC idea for both
8. Raksha from The Jungle Book with a Kriti Sanon FC possibly
See above.
9. Jasmine from Aladdin possibly with a Yasmine Al-Bustami FC?
I’m trash for worldbuilding! I created Avalor I’d get to create Agrabah! Eeeee!
10. Ember Lumen possible FC include: Song Yuqi, Zhao Lusi, Sun Zhenni, Pat Chayanit Chansangavej, Imada Mio, Uchinaga Aeri (Giselle), Komatsu Nana, Mint Ranchrawee, Prilly Latuconsina, Lee Sung-kyung, Kim Yong-ji
But I'd want at least one of her parents maybe too :3
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New york weekend, back home tomorrow at 7am. i'm walking a lot. sam asleep during powernap time. update and more pics below
feeling so nonstop but we are having a stop morning which is awesome. everyone is such a character i think i'll move here next year. i wish i could pick up all my friends from home and drop them here with me. last night sam and i had a lot of fun making new friends too. my first night i stayed with dear althea who i missed so much. she has a new place in bushwick and the light is beautiful. i have been staying up later than usual and sleeping better than usual, and coffee is starting to work on me. yesterday i walked 22,500 steps.
in the moments i've had to myself i can get a little sad. i get so jealous of the couples holding hands and leaning on each other on the train, and then i miss hayden even more. then i feel less sad when i am with my friends. new york would eat me alive if i did not have such good friends here. i will walk off sadness
last night we passed a girl who said "i really like walking it's one of my favorite hobbies." she's so right.
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The Game: Chapter 22
<-- Previous Chapter || Next Chapter -->
Prince's P.O.V
Prince picked up their phone from the side table when they heard it buzz. It was a text from Hayden.
Hello love!
He had texted Prince almost every day since the summer began. The couple weren’t used to being away from each other for such a long time so that was how they were coping.
Prince had been spending most of their time by themself so far. They occasionally went to events that their classmates planned and tried to socialize but they felt really out of place without their boyfriend there. Hayden usually did most of the talking when they were with friends so Prince found themself tiring quickly when they were alone.
Happy to talk to their boyfriend again, Prince typed a simple ‘hi’ in response. Within seconds, Hayden sent another message.
Anything fun happen today?
Prince thought about it. They didn’t do much today.
No
It didn’t make for good conversation but it was the truth. Luckily, Hayden always knew how to keep things interesting.
How’s that game going? Have you scored any points yet?
That was something Prince hadn’t been paying much attention to. Sure, they went to all the dinner meetings but they would just zone out the entire time. Originally they signed up for the game because they thought it would be fun and they were pretty good at getting people into their bed. When they got there though, they found it hard to get into the mood because of how much they missed Hayden.
No. I’m having trouble relaxing without you here
Prince saw Hayden typing right away and soon a new message popped up.
Awww I’m sorry to hear that babe
I miss you too
That made Prince smile. They loved that Hayden could make them smile even when they were by themself in a hotel room, miles away from him.
Their phone buzzed again, signaling another message.
Speaking of that, I have some great news
Prince leaned forward as they waited for the next message, interested.
I talked to my family about me going home early since I miss you so much and I’m not having any fun without you here. They were totally okay with it so I’m leaving next week!
That was great news. Prince began to think of a plan of action, wondering how fast they could get back home.
That’s amazing! I’ll see if I can leave early too. I can’t wait to see you
Hayden’s response was immediate.
No need! I already contacted the school and they said I can come join the summer camp. We get to spend the rest of the summer on vacation together
Isn’t that awesome?
Prince’s heart was soaring. Their boyfriend always found a way to make everything work out perfectly. He was clever and had a silver tongue so he could make things happen if he wanted to. Prince loved that about him.
You’re actually the best
It was true. Hayden never failed to impress.
I love you
Prince smiled at his response and texted back right away.
I love you too
Prince set their phone down beside them and smiled again. This summer was going to turn out for the better after all.
The phone buzzed again and Prince picked it back up, wondering what else there was to say after that.
Do you think I could join Zoe’s game when I get there?
It was an interesting idea. The couple was well aware that many of their classmates found both of them very alluring. They could probably have a shot at winning if they worked together. It would be fun too, a great excuse to finally hook up with all the people they wanted to but never had time for. Yes, this was definitely a good idea.
I can ask Zoe. She’ll probably say yes
Again, Hayden was typing right away. The message came soon after.
Perfect! We’re going to have so much fun
That they were. The couple would make sure of it.
Announcements:
Score Sheet - Day 7:
(no updates today)
Damon - 0
Kelly - 1
Max - 0
Naomi - 7
Prince - 0
Tyler - 0
Xavier - 1
Zoe - 4
#the game#this one doesn't need the community label buuuuut I'm putting it there just in case#freeform
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I think I've said it before, but I'm gonna say it again. @ DC, there's one person who needs to play Batman and I will throw so much money at you if you do. Because he's actually closer to the age Bruce should be and also, he has all the chops and looks for it.
Hayden. Goddamn. Christensen.
I look at him and I see all the potential. I can genuinely see him playing the himbo billionaire that is Bruce Wayne. The gentle, fun loving man that he is that can woo anyone. And I can genuinely see him pulling off the intensity and the strength of Batman, with just that slight bit of brooding but also the compassion that is wholly Batman. The person that takes care of Gotham and brings in hope.
Also, also DC, you love making money right? You wanna get the DC movies shining? (In theory, at least...yknow, you'd make a lot more money restoring the Snyderverse but)
I'm saying this as someone who hates the Joker and doesn't want to see him again. You have prime opportunity here to bring in your best Joker.
You would get so much money just from these two alone being on screen together, you have no fucking idea. Not only just because that's the fucking Skywalkers, but also Mark Hamill is the definitive voice of the Joker. Everyone would lose their shit.
Not to mention, let's remember who you have as Black Mask;
All I'm saying DC is you're sitting on a potential goldmine here and I will write the fucking movie for you. I'll write an entire goddamn movie series or, hell, we'll make an HBO Max series, I am prepared for all of this.
#dc#dc comics#batman#bruce wayne#batfam#hayden christensen#mark hamill#ewan mcgregor#star wars#LISTEN I THINK HAYDEN WOULD BE A PERFECT BRUCE A N D BATMAN#and most actors can't get both right. or even one of them....looking at you bale.#and probably robert pattinson if im being honest i dont have high expectations there#i digress#hayden would be an awesome pick
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A/N: Hiiii!! More writing! Yay! This was a fun one!! It’s 98% fluff with 2% angst, but I promise it has a happy ending 🙂 Thank you all so much for your encouraging words!! I cherish them all & hold them close to my heart 🥺 Any and all feedback is appreciated! I hope you enjoy !
Summary: From your first date, first kiss, first hockey game of Mat’s, first I love you, to your first fight…You always learned something new about him.
MASTERLIST | LET’S CHAT 🥂 | Mat Barzal x Reader
Warnings: One swear word & brief allusion to smut // WC: 11.6K // Fluff & Slight Angst
It was your first date.
A blind date.
The nerves got the best of you, so you arrived at the coffee shop early. What if the subway line you had to take was late? What if you missed a stop? What if you took a wrong turn down a street? Twenty minutes might be a bit too early, but it was the only way to ease your anxiety.
You don’t even know the last time you were on a blind date. Your friend, Hayden, had set it up. After a drunken confession over a shared bottle of wine, you admitted you were scared that you were running out of time to find your person. And that’s when an idea clicked in her mind.
She said she had a friend––Mat––who was tired of flings and wanted to really date someone. You waved her off, the idea of being set up seemed too middle school for you. But after she showed you a picture of him…you gave her the go ahead to send him your number.
She contacted Mat, and he said that he was all in for a blind date with you.
You tapped your foot on the pavement as you stood outside of the coffee shop entrance you agreed to meet at. After scrolling through your social media a few times, you clicked on your messages. Were you at the right coffee shop? You clicked on his name, and triple checked that you had the correct place and time.
“Uh, Y/N?”
At the sound of your name, you peered up from your phone and saw a nervous looking boy––a boy you recognized from the picture your friend showed you on a drunken Friday night. With a nervous breath, you offered him a tight lipped smile, “Mat?”
He visibly relaxed at your confirmation that he didn’t walk up a stranger. He ran a hand through his messy styled hair and easily smiled, “Yeah, I––Hi.”
“Hi,” you let out a small laugh.
Oh my God, this is so awkward, you thought to yourself. This was why blind dates were only met for middle school. A blind date was not meant for anytime after that.
While you hadn’t even spent five minutes in his presence, your mind already jumped to the worst conclusion of this not working out as either of you planned. While dating might not work out, maybe you could get a friend out of this.
Mat took a step around you and opened the door, “Should we head in?”
With a nod, you thanked him for holding the door open. Walking in, you were instantly engulfed with the smell of freshly ground coffee beans and the sound of hardworking espresso machines. The shop was bustling with city goers, but there were enough empty tables that you didn’t feel the need to rush to save one. You let out another deep breath as you felt Mat’s shoulder slightly brush yours as he stood next to you in line.
“What are you getting?” He looked down at you.
You tilted your head as you read the menu board that hung behind the counter, “Maybe one of their house lattes?” You then moved your gaze to look up at him, “What about you?”
He shrugged his shoulders, eyes not nearly looking at the menu for as long as you did to decide on a drink, before his eyes landed back on you with a smile, “An iced coffee.”
His smile was infectious. His smile was pretty. And you felt your stomach twist in knots the more you paid attention to the way his smile affected you.
“Also, you can––uh––get whatever you want,” his checks turned a bright shade of red as he stumbled over his words, “I’ll buy.”
You shook your head, but before you could say anything, the two of you were at the front of the line.
Mat was first with his order––an iced coffee––and then he turned his body to look at you, “And whatever she’s having.” You smiled in appreciation and gave the barista your order. You were about to move out of the way, and wait for Mat to be done paying, but he asked you another question, “Do you want anything to eat?”
You felt bad having him pay for coffee and something to eat. It was a coffee shop in New York after all, but the sound of your stomach making a high-pitched grumble sold you out. You felt yourself grow hot with embarrassment, and asked for a croissant. Mat tacked on two croissants to the order and swiped his credit card as if the steep price for two coffees and two pastries in a New York coffee shop wasn’t a concern.
From the two details Hayden had told you––which were his name and age––you knew he was young like you. If you wanted to splurge on a day like this, you needed to budget ahead of time correctly. While you were appreciative of Mat paying for you…it was a blind date. And you didn’t expect him to put so much effort into it
Maybe he budgeted his money better than you.
With your croissants on a plate, the two of you found a place to sit by a window. You tapped your fingers on the wooden table top. It was still awkward, you thought to yourself, as you counted down the seconds until your drinks came. Mat seemed to feel the awkwardness in the air too, but he braved his way through the weird atmosphere.
“So…” he nodded his head for ten seconds straight, eyes darting around the coffee shop, as he cut through the silence, “Where are you from?”
You answered his question, rambling a bit to fill the void, and then asked him the same question. It went back and forth like that for maybe thirteen minutes until your drinks were brought out to your table. Thankful that you had something to sip on if there was a lull in conversation, you circled your hands around the hot mug.
But the conversation never hit a lull; it was fun not knowing anything about Mat before you met him. And he seemed to enjoy it as much as you. You struggled to drink your coffee in a reasonable amount of time to save it from growing cold because of how much the two of you consecutively talked.
“So what do you do?” You took a sip of your lukewarm coffee.
He raised an eyebrow, “What do I do?”
You hummed a simple mhm at him as you swallowed down your drink, “Like, for work,” you set your mug down on the table and leaned forward, “What’s your job?”
“My job…” Mat muttered under his breath as he leaned back on the chair, crossing his arms over his chest. Your eyes flickered down to see the slight flex of his muscles, and when you reconnected eyes with him, he smirked, “I play hockey.”
You scrunched your eyebrows together, “Hockey?”
Mat nodded his head, the smirk on his face growing, as he kept silent. The two of you had been doing so well in avoiding silences, but you caught yourself in one. So, you took a sip of your drink, in hopes he would say something more about his job. But he continued to confidently sit back in his seat.
Not enjoying the sudden awkwardness, you added a futile point to your conversation, “I––I have some friends who play hockey. Only on the weekends though. Kind of like a rec league? Or just a pick up game––”
If you thought his smile was infectious, all you had to do was hear his laugh.
It was soft, a little more high-pitched than you imagined, as he slightly shook his head back and forth. The corners of his eyes crinkled slightly as his eyes shut for a few seconds. As his soft laughter settled down, he scratched the bridge of his nose, eyes glimmering under the natural light that shined through the window next to him.
It was a glimpse into how he sounded when he felt happy. And you wanted nothing more than to hear a real––eyes screwed shut tight, nose wrinkling, head tilted back––laugh from him.
Mat mirrored you; he leaned slightly forward, forearms resting against the table as his smile slowly transformed back into a smirk, “I play professional hockey.”
Professional hockey…But he looked so young. The only rational explanation you could think of in your head was that he played hockey for a minor league team in New York.
With a nod of your head, you took another sip of your drink. The hour you had spent with Mat flowed easily, but for some reason, finding out that he was some sort of professional athlete produced a feeling of insecurity inside of you.
You took another long sip of your coffee.
“You’ll have to come to a game,” Mat’s confident voice dropped to a hesitant whisper, “If you want to.”
Setting the empty mug down on the table, you bit the inside of your cheek to conceal your growing smile. You let out a silent deep breath, collecting your thoughts, because if he wanted you to come watch him play, that meant he had to see some sort of future with you.
Whether the future be two and a half weeks, five months, or four years…He saw you in his life somehow.
“I’d like to see you play,” you assured him.
His eyebrows animatedly rose up, almost getting lost under the loose strands of hair that fell a little too perfectly against his forehead, and smiled wide, “Awesome, that’s––Okay, yeah, I’ll text you about it.”
Neither of you could hide the smiles on your face.
After sitting at the table with empty coffee mugs for quite some time, the only reason why the date ended was because Mat said he had to go dog sit for one of his teammates. Regretfully, both of you brought your empty coffee mugs to the counter, and walked out the door with smiles, laughter, and a promise from Mat to text you about attending one of his games.
As you made the journey back to your place, you didn’t know the last time you felt this giddy after a first date. While you learned surface level information about him; you also learned the sound of his laugh, and that he wasn’t too fond of dogs.
And you couldn’t wait to learn more about him.
–––
It was your first kiss with Mat.
A nervous first kiss.
It came close to a month after your first date, and admittedly, it was probably the longest you had waited for a first kiss, but Mat had a streak of away games that kept him from New York and the two of you had only hung out in public. While a first kiss walking through a park had been romanticized one too many times, it would have left you in a daydream––but whenever it felt right––someone always came up to Mat to talk about hockey. While he wasn’t approached in public often, it seemed like whenever he was, it ruined the moment.
Maybe it was a sign he would be better off as just a friend.
But that thought always disappeared whenever he gently slid his hand into yours, intertwining your fingers and giving your hand a squeeze. And just like the first time you held his hand, there was an explosion of ecstasy in your chest. A good tightness in your chest you felt whenever he held your hand.
You were at a bar with Mat and some friends, your fingers interlocked and resting on his thigh, pressed close up to his side. A smile lit up your face whenever you felt his chest lightly shake with laughter or his thumb softly graze the top of your hand. The only part of the night where your smile tugged downward was when everyone decided to call it an early night.
As if Mat felt the same disappointment, he whispered in your ear, “I’ll take you back to your place.”
You wished he would ask if you wanted to get ice-cream at the parlor a few blocks over, or ask if you wanted to stay at the bar, but you knew he had an early morning tomorrow. All you wanted was to spend more time with him, and if him making sure you got home alright was how you spent more time with him, you would take it.
After tabs were paid off and goodbyes were said, everyone was off in their separate directions. Except for you and Mat.
Surprisingly, the streets weren’t that crowded for it being the early evening in New York, but Mat tugged you close to his side; fingers still intertwined. The walk to the subway was full of quiet conversation of observations the two of you made down the street with a few small laughs. And when you were on the platform for your train, your laughs turned to whispers.
“If Beau was a little too much, let me know,” Mat leaned down to whisper softly in your ear, “and I’ll beat him up.”
A soft chuckle left your lips as you leaned your head against his bicep, shaking your head, you looked up at him, “You said that last time. He’s nice, I like him.”
Mat hummed, “Sometimes his teasing goes a little too far.”
His voice was light-hearted, just like how Tito sounded when he teased Mat whenever he whispered in your ear throughout the evening, but there was an underlying uncertainty in his voice. Almost like he was concerned that if Tito teased you too much you wouldn’t want to spend anymore time with Mat. But that was quite the opposite. Whenever a best friend poked fun at the other, it was almost always meant in good nature, and it also showed that Mat confided his feelings about you with Tito.
You mirrored his soft hum, and squeezed his hand, as you shrugged your shoulders, “I wouldn’t mind more of his teasing,” you smiled up at him, hoping that he caught the hidden meaning behind your sentence; you seeing a future together with more interactions with his best friend. “My friends are the same way.”
Mat raised his eyebrows, and you ducked your chin into your chest out of nervousness at his next words, “So is that our next date? I meet your friends?”
Next date.
The thought of going on countless more dates with Mat caused an electric jolt to shoot down your spine. And when you flicked your eyes up to stare into his, you felt as if you were caught in one of your dreams. His eyes were already gazing on you in awe, with the corners of his lips lightly tuned upward into a soft closed lipped smile.
He moved his head closer to yours, it was just a centimeter of movement, but you noticed it. And you held your breath as you looked down at his lips, hoping that you would finally have your first kiss with Mat.
But like all of the people who interrupted the two of you whenever you were on a walk in the park, the harsh breaking sounds of the subway coming to a halt caused Mat to move away and stand up straight.
Mat cleared his throat and you let out a sigh at the ruined moment.
The train stopped, you waited until people were off the train car, and Mat swiftly tugged on your hand to make sure that the train didn’t escape before you had the chance to get on. The train car was empty, also a very rare sight on a still relatively early evening in New York. You made your way to sit on one of the empty seats, but your stretched out arm snapped back into Mat’s chest as he held tight onto your hand.
“Do you not want to sit?” You looked up at him as he gripped onto the pole in the center of the subway car.
Mat shook his head as he dropped your hand. But you didn’t have time to be sad at the loss of contact for long because Mat curled his arm around your waist, “Too dirty,” he mumbled under his breath as he pulled you close to his chest, “And we’ve been sitting all night, kinda wanna stand.”
You rolled your eyes at him and pressed your palms flat against his chest as the train jolted to a start.
Standing in silence with Mat on the empty subway was more relaxing than it should have been. Because while the unpleasant sound of the subway on the tracks echoed through the tunnel, with your head resting on Mat’s chest, all you heard was the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.
You could feel yourself dozing off as his thumb rubbed soothing circles on your hip, but your senses heightened when he trailed his hand slowly up your back. The feeling of his fingertips making contact with your spine caused goosebumps along your skin. And you swore your breathing stopped when you felt his hand trail up your neck, his fingers cradling the back of your head with his thumb on your cheek.
Hesitantly––hoping that you knew what was to come in the next few moments––you looked up at Mat through your eyelashes.
His bottom lip was pulled between his teeth as he stared down at you with a crease in between his eyebrows. With your hands still firmly placed on his chest, you could feel the deep breath he let out through his nose.
“I like you,” Mat blurted out.
You let out a breathy chuckle at his admission. You knew that he liked you by the way he always held your hand and how he liked to call you more than text, but to hear him verbalize his feelings felt nice.
You bit the inside of your cheek to contain your smile as you saw his head move a centimeter closer to yours, “I like you, too.”
Mat glanced at your lips, and then at your eyes, and even with a slight nod of your head, Mat still hesitated as if he was waiting for you to pull away. But you weren’t going to pull away––you didn’t want to pull away––because you had been waiting for this moment where your heart hammered in your chest, and your breath got caught in your throat.
And as you felt him let out another shaky breath, you closed your eyes and leaned up on your toes to press a kiss to his lips. His lips touched yours gently at first, a tender brush, as if he anticipated being electrocuted by a spark. But when nothing happened, Mat tucked his lower lip between yours in another gentle, but lingering kiss.
You had plenty of first kisses before in your life; there had been first kisses that had been harder, more rushed, more chaste…but never had you felt a first kiss that was so simple and right than you did with Mat. Your lips were merely pressed together, but you could still feel him everywhere.
There was something so innocent about the kiss, as if both of you were afraid to mess up.
The two of you separated just as softly as you’d come together, just enough room to where you could peer up at him and still feel his breath across your face. Then the two of you laughed. Shy, whispery giggles that had more to do with nerves rather than humor. And as the two of you continued to stare into each other’s eyes, it was as if instinct kicked in and Mat’s lips were back on yours.
This time, your lips met with more certainty, eager to feel. A soft sigh escaped your lips when Mat parted his lips further and you felt the tip of his tongue. The hand that had previously cupped your cheek, was now on around your lower back as he pressed you close to him. And to keep yourself steady as the subway car went around a bend, one of your hands gripped his shirt as the other clutched onto his bicep.
As the two of you shared your first kiss on an empty New York subway, you learned a few more things about Mat. You finally learned what his lips felt like pressed against yours, and that he was absolutely terrible at navigating the subway after the two of you missed your stop.
With the way he made you feel during your first kiss, you couldn’t wait to feel that spark of joy again.
–––
It was your first hockey game.
Your first New York Islanders hockey game where you knew a player on the ice…and more importantly, where a player was your boyfriend.
“Oh he will love it,” Hayden smirked at the #13 jersey you wore as the two of you walked with the crowd toward the arena, “I still can’t believe you thought he was a minor league hockey player.”
You lightly knocked your shoulder against hers as you let out a small laugh, “How was I supposed to know he played for the National Hockey League?” You raised your eyebrows at her, “You literally only told me his name and that we were around the same age when you set us up.”
She tipped her head back in laughter, “I thought you paid attention to sports!”
“I do!” You mirrored her smile as the two of you took out your tickets to be scanned, “But you can’t see what they look like under their helmets clearly.”
After the two of you passed security, you found yourself amongst a sea of white, navy blue, and orange as you walked to your seats, “I still can’t believe he didn’t tell you he played for the Isles.” She snickered, “He has way too big of an ego to let that slide.”
You felt your stomach churn with embarrassment as your whole body heated up.
While Mat said that he played professional hockey on your first date, he conveniently left out that he played for the New York Islanders. It was a week and a half after your first date when you found out that detail. Mat was away for a few road games, and as the two of you were texting, he casually slipped in that you should watch the game on T.V.
You thought he was joking because you didn’t think that they broadcasted minor league hockey games on television. But he called you to give you his NHL TV login and informed you to tune in at 7 PM for the New York Islanders game. Again, you thought he was joking, but you tuned in anyway.
The shock you felt through your body was unlike anything else you felt when you heard the announcers talk about how amazing Mat Barzal has played for years as an Islander. And when the camera focused in on him for a few seconds, you scrambled to text Hayden for confirmation.
But now, nearly three months into your relationship, you had found a time where your schedule worked with Mat’s to go to one of his games. He asked if you wanted to sit with his teammate’s significant others, but you said you would be more comfortable with Hayden for your first hockey game of his.
As the two of you sat down a few rows behind the Islanders bench, you tugged the sleeves of your #13 Barzal jersey over your hands. He’s your boyfriend, you thought to yourself as you felt self-conscious wearing his jersey, no need to be nervous…other people are wearing his jersey too.
But those other people didn’t share intimate moments with him. Other people didn’t know how his calloused hands felt as they delicately touched your skin. Other people didn’t know he slightly snored when he napped.
Sure, other people idolized him as a hockey player, but you were always in awe of him when you learned a specific trait about him that he didn’t share with the rest of the world.
“Do you see him?” Hayden leaned over to speak in your ear as she pointed to Mat skating on the ice, “Right there.”
With a hockey stick in his hands, Mat skated in circles to practice his puck movement. The face you admired so much was hidden under his helmet, but you could clearly see his number and last name on his jersey.
You smiled wide and nodded your head, “This is exciting.”
Hayden laughed at your eagerness to have the game start as you practically bounced in your seat. Soon enough, the players finished their warm ups and skated toward the bench. One by one, they hopped off the ice.
“I’m gonna call out his name,” Hayden smirked as she cupped her hands around her mouth.
But with wide eyes and embarrassment already in the pit of your stomach, you pulled her hands away from her mouth, “Don’t you dare––”
“Looks like he’s already found you,” Hayden’s smirk widened as she waved her hand at who you presumed was Mat.
You whipped your head around to the bench and saw Mat, with his helmet off, awkwardly half-turned around on the bench as he sat next to a number #18 and #27. And like every time you saw him, a smile that you couldn’t contain instantly made its way onto your face. You picked up your hand and animatedly waved at him with a beaming smile.
Mat lowered his head for a moment, hair slightly falling onto his forehead, and when he picked his head up to wave at you, you saw his cheeks twinged with pink coloring.
Feeling too excited watching your boyfriend play live for the first time tonight, you couldn’t help but turn your shoulder toward him as you showed off the #13 on your sleeve. When you dropped the hand that stretched out the sleeve to show him his number, you expected to see a smile as wide as yours on his face. But instead, you saw his eyes wide open and mouth formed in a straight line, jaw slightly clenched, as his chest expanded; taking in a deep breath.
Confused, you tilted your head and looked at Hayden, “Is he not happy that I’m wearing––”
Letting out her loudest laugh of the night, Hayden bent forward and clutched her stomach, “Oh, you don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself into.”
Hayden had known Mat longer than you, so you knew that she knew things about him that you weren’t privy to yet. But her comment intrigued you.
“What do you mean?”
She just shook her head as her shoulders still slightly shook.
You turned back around in hopes to see Mat, but when your eyes landed on the bench, you saw Mat being jostled between the two players he sat next to. And upon further inspection, you read the last names on the jersey’s; Beauvillier and Lee.
Lee was still elbowing Mat when Tito turned around with a wicked smile. He cupped a hand around his mouth, “Nice jersey! He loves it!”
Tito’s voice fell a little flat among the crowd that started to fill their way to their seats, but you still heard him. And his comment only spurred on more laughter from Hayden.
At this point in your relationship with Mat, you were used to Tito’s teasing. And in the time you had been in the arena, you had grown accustomed to Hayden’s laughs. You didn’t think too much of their actions, your mind still wrapped around how all you wanted was for the game to begin.
And soon enough, the game started.
You were on the edge of your seat for the entire first period, clutching Hayden’s hand anytime Mat was shoved from behind or slammed into the boards. The second period was just as thrilling, and even though a penalty was called on Mat, he caught your eye briefly before he sat down in the penalty box. And the third period…While you stood up and cheered with the rest of the arena whenever the Islanders scored, no amount of excitement in the first two periods felt as exhilarating as when you watched Mat score.
With Hayden, you leaped up and hugged her tight as you cheered with a blinding smile.
“He scored!” You held her at arm's length away before turning your attention back on the ice.
His line-mates gathered him up in a hug, patting his helmet, and then he skated out with a wide smile. Mat was on his way to high-five his teammates on the bench, but before he held his glove out for them, he quickly pointed in the general direction of where you were sitting.
To anyone, it looked like he was pointing toward the Islanders bench, or even at the fans. And while there was an increase of cheers from your section at Mat’s little call out, you knew he was pointing out one specific fan in the crowd.
After the third period ended––with the Islanders winning by three––fans could either be heard still celebrating, or seen walking up the aisles to beat the traffic. But you and Hayden stayed in your seats, and especially paid attention to Mat who was out on the ice giving a post-game interview. His voice boomed through the arena, but all you could focus on was his heavy breathing and how his hair stuck to his sweaty forehead.
With most of your section cleared out, you and Hayden walked down to the row right behind the glass that was closest to the ice. Not one to shy away from being heard, Hayden pounded her fist against the glass and shouted your boyfriend’s name, “Mat!”
She continued to pound on the glass and call out his name until his post-game interview ended. And when the camera cut, Mat’s eyebrows automatically rose as he skated toward the two of you with a smile.
Through the glass, you waved at him, “You played so well! So amazing––And that goal?! You were so incredible.” His wide smile slowly transformed into a smirk as his eyes darkened just a bit, “That was so much fun.”
Mat chuckled and shook out his hair, “‘I’m glad you had a good time.”
“You two!” Hayden called out. You and Mat both broke eye contact with each other to see your mutual friend standing a few rows up with her phone pointed at the two of you, “Smile! It’s your first hockey game together.”
You let out a soft laugh as you turned around and leaned your back against the glass, standing up on your tiptoes so you didn’t look shorter next to Mat who wore skates. And as if he was physically next to you, and not separated by plexiglass, you leaned your head towards him and smiled wider than you had ever in your life.
After Hayden finished taking more than enough photos to commemorate your first hockey game of Mat’s, you spun around to face him again. From behind, you heard an usher say that it was time for fans to leave the arena, but you clearly heard Hayden say, I’m with her and that’s her boyfriend.
You rolled your eyes at Hayden and scratched the bridge of your nose as you stared at Mat through the glass.
“I need to change,” He chuckled, “But I’ll meet you outside? Hayden knows where the exit is.”
You nodded your head vigorously, “That sounds good, yeah,” the smile you had when you took your picture together never left your face, “I still can’t believe how well you played, it was––Oh my God. I can’t wait to come to more games.”
The smirk Mat had on his face as you praised his performance morphed into a faint smile as he poked the glass with his glove where your face was, “Keep the compliments coming when I’m off the ice.” You rolled your eyes at him as he waved at you, “I’ll see you soon.”
You raised your hand to touch the cold glass, “Bye,” you whispered as your fingertips slowly trailed down the glass as you watched Mat skate away backwards.
Feeling like you were on top of the world, you spun around with a lovesick smile on your face, ready to meet your boyfriend at the exit. Walking up the aisle and out of the arena, Hayden sent you the pictures she took of you and Mat. And as you waited by the exit Mat said Hayden knew, you set your lock screen and home screen to one of the pictures taken just twenty minutes ago.
When you heard the familiar laugh of your boyfriend, your ears perked up and you put your phone in your bag. And when you saw him walking out in his game day suit with Tito––who shoved Mat’s shoulder––for the hundredth time that day, you smiled.
Standing up from the stone ledge you sat on with Hayden, you rocked on your heels as you waited for Mat to come closer. And once he wasn’t too far away, you sped walked over to Mat as Hayden walked more slowly behind you as she snorted at your eagerness.
While you found it fun to watch Mat skate around the ice having the time of his life, there was nothing you enjoyed more than hugging him. You almost didn’t see his glowing smile––one that showcased all of his teeth––before you barreled into him.
Arms wrapped tightly around his waist, you hugged him impossibly close to you, “That was––Ah!––I’m still not over how fun that was,” you pressed a kiss to his neck before tilting your head up to look at him, “I know I already said how good your goal was so good––And I’ll stop after this––But really, that was so cool how you skated around those defenders and––”
Both Tito and Hayden’s laugh caused you to stop complimenting Mat on his goal. You caught a glimpse of Mat’s glare on his two friends, and then turned your head over your shoulder to see them hanging off each other as they laughed. You felt Mat’s hands tighten around your waist, the tips of his fingers felt like they burned a hole through your clothes and scorched your skin.
“Oh don’t––Don’t mind us,” Hayden wiped a few tears away from the corners of her eyes, “Please, carry on––”
You scrunched your eyebrows together in confusion.
“Barz, will––He’ll––” Tito’s face went red as he found it harder to breathe through his laughter. But once he calmed down, he chuckled, “Don’t stop praising him, he loves it.”
Mat flipped off his friends as he raised his hand to where the 13 patch was on your shoulder. With a small smile, he tugged on your sleeve a few times, “Hayden, send me the pictures you took,” he yelled over to his still laughing friends before he pressed a quick kiss to your lips.
As the night continued on, the four of you celebrated the win and Mat’s goal with drinks at a bar. As you leaned your head on Mat’s shoulder, you learned how fun it was to attend one of his games. And you learned that the rush of joy you felt course through your veins when you saw Mat succeed was unparalleled to any feeling of happiness you had ever felt with a partner.
And late that night in Mat’s apartment, as your hands wandered through his hair, over his biceps, and across his chest…He trailed his lips across your cheek, down your neck, and down past the valley of your breasts…You also learned that Mat liked to be praised in more ways than one.
–––
It was your first I love you.
The first I love you that you said to a person where you felt the sensation of those words taking over every crevice of your body…but like your first date, those words made you anxious and light-headed at the thought of admitting it.
Love.
Love was a commitment; a feeling that shouldn’t be taken lightly when in relation to two people who mutually cared and respected each other. It was a word you cherished, a feeling you craved nothing more in the world; and it was exactly how you felt about Mat.
Eleven months into your relationship with Mat––that you didn’t even think would get this far––you knew you were in love with him. There were times the sentence almost slipped past your lips, and there were moments where you thought he would say it too…but like your first kiss, both of you were hesitant.
Since the day you met him, you learned something new about him each day, and you didn’t want to stop getting to know him.
“So, what are you doing with your break?” You spoke through your phone as you waited at a street corner for the light to change with a group of people.
Mat scoffed, “This is hardly a break,” he bitterly whispered into his phone, “Literally not even a five minute water break.”
You gripped the brown paper bag of small groceries in your hand as your heart ached at his exhausted voice. Mat explained to you that the Islanders were going through some sort of bootcamp to get them out of their losing slump. But the bootcamp was on top of their already packed schedule of games and practices.
“And they can do this?” The light changed and you moved with the crowd, “It doesn’t seem fair.”
Mat let out an exasperated breath, and you could picture him running a hand over his face, “I miss you.”
Him changing the subject wasn’t lost on you, but with the limited time Mat had and how drained he sounded, you knew better than to press the subject further.
“I miss you too,” you smiled softly as you dodged a few people walking down the opposite direction of you on the sidewalk, “I just bought stuff for dinner tonight though, so that’s––”
But your sentence was cut off as someone rudely knocked into your shoulder hard––Watch it, they sneered at you––and caused you to stumble into a few people walking next to you.
“Sorry, sorry,” you apologized to the people you crashed into. They smiled in appreciation, knowing full well that if it wasn’t for the person who bumped your shoulder, the accident would’ve been averted.
“What was that?”
Mat’s worn out voice from before disappeared as he now sounded on high alert.
“Nothing,” you let out a sigh, because while you knew it wasn’t your fault you stumbled into people, it still felt embarrassing, “But as I was saying, for dinner––”
“No, that––I heard someone yell at you,” Mat’s voice was low, insistent on what he heard on your end, “What happened? Are you okay?”
You sucked in a deep breath, “Yeah, someone just bumped into my shoulder.” Because while it was New York, and you had been bumped into plenty of times before, it had been a bit of a rough day. But you didn’t want that one thing to tip you over the edge, especially when you knew Mat was having it worse than you, “It’s fine, I’m fine. The eggs didn’t crack so it’s a win.”
Mat didn’t laugh at your attempt at a joke.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” He paused before his voice dropped to an earnest whisper, “If you need me I can leave to come get you.”
“But practice––”
“No,” Mat cut you off, “If you need me I can leave.”
You thought about it. You thought hard about just waiting off in a park for Mat to come pick you up. But the subway station you needed to enter came into your eyesight. Even though he couldn’t see you, you shook your head, “I’m fine, I’ll just need a hug when I see you later.”
At that, Mat let out a breathy chuckle, “You and me both.”
You smiled, the familiar feeling of love that started with the squeeze of your heart spread through the rest of your body.
“Dinner at your place?”
“Yeah, my place tonight,” you answered him, “How much longer of this practice?”
You could hear the eye roll Mat gave off with his irritated voice, “Three fucking hours.”
Even though you weren’t a professional athlete, you rolled your eyes with him at how ridiculous all of the intense practice sounded, “As much as I want to keep talking with you,” you dreamily smiled to yourself because there was nothing you loved more than hearing Mat’s voice, “I know you said if players were late they have to run laps after practice.” You grimaced, “And I’m about to go under for the subway.”
Mat let out a sigh, he didn’t want to stop talking with you either, “Yeah…Running laps is the penalty.”
“You should be used to those.”
Mat scoffed at your comment, ”I’ll see you later at your place.”
“Mhm, bye Mat,” you hummed as you began to make your descent below ground, “I love you.”
“Wait, what––”
You ended the call and slid your phone into your bag as you took out your subway card. Easily, you swiped your card past tourists, and walked through the turnstile to the platform back to your place. While the rest of the day wasn’t on your side, the subway was, because your train pulled up right as you got to the platform.
While there were still seats available for you to sit in, you had grown accustomed to standing in the middle of the subway cart. You hooked your elbow around the pole, so that your hand wasn’t directly touching it, as you thought about the day on your way home.
It started off normal; waking up, getting ready for work, arriving at the office. But then small things started to happen; you forgot your laptop charger back at your apartment, someone had accidentally taken your lunch from the communal fridge because they thought it was theirs, and then someone spilled coffee on your freshly printed reports. But then the day got worse; Mat texted you saying he wouldn’t be done practice until late, your co-worker best friend said they were leaving the company for a new job, and then that stranger hit your shoulder.
But hearing Mat’s voice made your day a little better.
Knowing that he took time out of his grueling schedule to check in on you made your heart flutter even more with love.
Love.
Your eyes widened as the grip you had on the handle of the paper bag dropped. Your grocery bag fell to the ground just as fast as your heart. Because the last sentence you said to Mat replayed in your mind like a broken record.
I love you.
You didn’t even realize that you had said those words. You clutched those words close to your chest; held them so tight as if it was a secret Mat didn’t already know. And now all of a sudden…Your secret was out in the open.
The bile churning in your stomach caused your body to overheat and you wanted nothing more than to be out of the subway. You picked a loose piece of skin by your thumb so hard that it started to bleed. You swore under your breath as it began to sting, and curled your hand into a tight fist––with your thumb on the inside––to put pressure on the cut.
Unable to stand still with your anxiety, you got off a stop early and walked the rest of the way back to your apartment.
You had nearly walked into several people, almost walked across the street on a red light, and more or less banged your forehead against your front door. You thought you had unlocked the door, so when you turned the door handle, stepped forward, and walked into the wooden door…you saw that your keys had fallen to the ground.
Once you properly unlocked the door, you quickly walked into your apartment and hastily set the grocery bag down on the island. With shaking hands, you buried your face into them and let out a muffled whine. Because how could you let those words out so casually? How could you have been so careless?
Mat had three more hours left of practice. And that left you with three hours in your apartment alone.
You couldn’t even bring yourself to look at your phone to see if he was still coming over. So you cleaned. You changed out of your work clothes––into a pair of athletic shorts and one of Mat’s Islander shirts––and deep cleaned as much of your apartment as you could.
And it was when you were bent sideways, windex and paper towel in hand, as you scrubbed the inside of your microwave that you heard a key in your door. You felt your heart freeze and you scrubbed the microwave even harder.
The creek of the door echoed through your modestly sized one bedroom apartment just as loud as your heartbeat pounded in your ears. The door shut the same time you heard the thump of his practice bag hit the hardwood floor.
And if you listened closely, you could hear him let out the same anxious deep breath as you.
Mat ever so slowly made his way out of the little hallway, and when you saw him appear in front of you––still bent at your awkward angle––it was as if you saw him in a different way.
Mat inhaled deeply, and then in one breath, his shoulders relaxed as he smiled at you, “I love you.”
You stared into his eyes enough times to know they were hazel, but where he stood in your kitchen, his eyes were dark brown. They weren’t illuminated with flecks of gold or green like you had seen in the past, but they were warm and inviting as his eyes captivated you in a different way than ever before. You loved his eyes.
You ran your fingers through his hair enough times to memorize the feeling how soft it felt, but his hair was a little longer in the front than usual. And with him looking like he ran right off the ice to be with you, his loose strands of scraggly hair fell messily against his forehead. You loved the way his hair framed his face.
Everything about him…from the slight stubble on his face that came close to breaking the Islanders facial hair policy, to the way he never got mad at you when you stuck your cold feet under his warm legs when you sat on the couch together. From his annoying traits, to the quirks only you knew about him, you loved everything about him
You released a breath you didn’t know you held because this…this was what it felt like to feel in love. It was fresh and exciting with hearts pounding. It was desire pouring through veins. It was a give and take; intertwined lives.
As the two of you stood in your kitchen, you learned what it felt like to feel entirely at ease with your place in the universe. For better or for worse, love is learning everything there is to know about a person.
And you couldn’t wait to learn how he loved.
–––
It was your first real fight with Mat.
And it terrified you.
The day had felt odd from the start; your routine not flowing like usual. And as the day continued on, you didn’t know what caused the negative feeling in the pit of your stomach to grow with every hour that passed. And even at the end of the work day, when you were in your own apartment, the feeling still lingered.
Already in a bad mood, you should’ve known better than to turn on a hockey game. But you knew that seeing Mat, even if it was through a T.V. screen, would make you feel better. He always made you feel better.
But he played a careless game.
It wasn’t even that he was playing bad, because honestly, he was playing really well. By the end of the first period he had two assists and handled the puck well. When the second period came around, he had scored his own goal. But Mat being Mat…he let the goal get to his head. The newfound confidence he had led him to be more aggressive with the opposing team’s players and more mouthy with the referees.
And with only six minutes left in the third period––the Islanders trailing by a few points––Mat dropped his gloves and instigated a fairly bad altercation with another player. You turned the television off before you could see Mat skate away to the penalty box.
Around an hour later when Mat walked through your apartment door the two of you stared at each other. You were curled up on the couch with a book, and he stood at the opposite end of the couch in his game day suit. He squinted his discolored left eye, his swollen bottom lip was bruised red, and you saw a few dried spots of blood on his face.
Neither of you were in the best mood, but that still wasn’t an excuse. Maybe you each expected the other to comfort you on your bad days…but that wasn’t the case for either of you now.
“I wish you were more careful,” you whispered up at him. You were still on the couch and he stood stiffly at the opposite end from you, “I don’t get why you have to fight.”
Mat let out an irritated breath out through his nostrils, “Did you even watch the game?”
Stunned by his attitude, you shut your book and rolled your eyes, “Of course I did. But that doesn’t mean––”
“Then you should know why I got in a fight.”
With a scoff, you flung the blanket off you and stood up. You mirrored his stiff position––jaw clenched, arms glued to your sides, and eyes narrowed in at him. The couch being the only barrier between the harsh words you threw at each other.
“That has nothing to do with what I said,” you huffed out, “I said you should be more careful––”
“I heard what you said,” Mat interrupted you with a snap in his tone as he shrugged off his suit jacket, “But I can’t control a fight if it happens.”
You pinched the bridge of your nose, “I watched the game, Mat. I saw that you started it.”
“So it’s my fault?” He didn’t look at you as he rolled his sleeves up to his elbows, “Look, I don’t expect you to understand everything that goes on on the ice––”
“Excuse me?”
Mat rolled his eyes and his already irritable tone of voice sharpened, “Maybe if you cared a little less you wouldn’t be mad.”
His words felt like a punch to your gut. If you cared a little less. The squeeze of your heart was different than what it felt like when he told you he loved you a few months ago. Because instead of a warm tingly feeling that lifted you up, you felt a harsh burn throughout your body that made you want to shrivel up and hide.
Mat was one of the people you cared most about in the world.
But with both of your bad attitudes, like water and oil, your words caused more separation.
Your response was harsh––If I cared a little less, then who would care about you––and it sparked Mat’s short temper. He told you there were other people, people who wouldn’t make a big deal if he got in a fight because it was hockey. The yelling continued, intentional words of hurt shouted between the two of you. And soon enough, with both of you too blinded by rage, neither of you remembered why the argument even started in the first place.
“There are other people,” Mat spat out as he breathed heavily, “People who know me better. If we weren’t together, there would be other people who––”
His cruel words caused complete and utter devastation to flood your body. And you let the anger and agony of Mat’s ill fated words overtake every logical thought in your mind.
“If you don’t need me, then what are you waiting for?!” You threw your hands up as your shrill voice cracked as bad as you felt your soul shatter. Chin wobbling and chest heaving with erratic breaths, you repeated the question. Although this time, your voice was a whisper as the destruction of your words caught up to you, “What are you waiting for?”
Mat ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head as he squeezed his eyes shut. And in a hurry, he scooped up his suit jacket from the couch and turned around. His heavy footsteps echoed through your silent apartment as you followed him to the door.
You choked on your words, “Where are you going?”
With his hand gripping the doorknob, you saw his shoulders tighten as he took a deep breath, “I can’t be with you.”
It felt as if the world froze, but at the same time, everything felt like it went too fast. A whirling sensation of grief caused you to lift your hand to cover your mouth. I can’t be with you.
You felt dizzy, unsure of if you wanted an answer to your question, “Are you…Does that mean just for now?” You bit your bottom lip as you tried your hardest to sniffle back your tears,”Or as in, you don’t want to be with me…anymore?”
Mat’s shoulders expanded in another deep breath as he mustered up the courage to turn around. Part of you wished he didn’t turn around because the heartbreak on his face looked just as bad as you felt. His chin wobbled like yours, lips pressed together in a firm line to keep his emotions to himself. His eyes were bloodshot, wide and scared like a child afraid of thunderstorms. And like yours, his chest heaved with small breaths, failing to keep his breathing under control.
“I don’t…” he shut his eyes tight and rubbed the corners of his eyes with his thumb and index finger, “Just for now.” Although his answer relieved only a sliver of anxiety you felt in the middle of your chest, it looked like he was still going to leave, “I need to leave before either of us say anything else we regret.”
Blinking rapidly, you still felt a few tears roll down your cheek as you nodded your head just as fast. You hugged your arms around your stomach and anxiously tapped your foot, “Will you…Are you coming back?”
A flash of pain crossed his face as he sucked in another deep breath, “Don't wait up for me.”
Before you could process his vague answer, his hand pressed down on the door handle and he was gone before he put his jacket back on. The door closed gently, but you would have rather it slammed shut so you would have that sound echoing in your mind instead of your insecurities.
Still hugging your stomach, you bit the inside of your cheek and slowly made your way back to the couch. As if it took all of your energy, you picked the blanket back up, wrapped it around your shoulders, and tucked yourself into the far corner. You sat alone, cold feet tucked in between the cushions, as you leaned your head back on the couch and let out a sob.
You purposefully said words to hurt him, and he had done the same with you. While the two of you had arguments before, they were never this blown out of proportion. There was never any screaming, there were never any tears, and neither of you had ever left the other’s place without reconciling. But with this fight…There was shouting, tears fell from both of you, and Mat left your place without a promise to come back.
You don’t know how many hours had passed as you stared at the wall ahead of you. But it was enough time for your cries to settle down and for the sound of a key to echo your silent home. And just like earlier in the night, Mat stood at the opposite end of the couch as you sat curled up in a blanket.
As the two of you stared at each other in silence, you learned what it felt like to sit in purgatory; not knowing if Mat was to come back that night or if you were to go days without seeing him. You learned what raw heartache truly felt like without his presence when all you wanted was a hug. And when he moved to sit next to you on the couch––finally receiving a hug from him––you also learned that he was just as sorry as you and didn’t mean any of the words he said.
You never wished to learn what a life without Mat truly felt like.
–––
The nerves you felt were worse than your first date with Mat. They had been with you for months, but they were now at an all time high that caused your hands to shake. And just like the nerves you felt before the blind date, they caused you to be twenty minutes early to the venue.
What if there was traffic? What if the piano player you and Mat hired brought the wrong sheet music? What if there weren’t enough seats? While you were twenty minutes earlier than your scheduled time that was designed to make sure you already arrived early to avoid any mishaps, it was the only way to ease your anxiety.
As you fiddled with the dress you always dreamed of wearing on this day, you inhaled a shaky breath as you stood in the private room alone. You needed space to concentrate on the fact that in less than a few hours you would have a different last name.
“Y/N?”
A light knock on the door and the call of your name caused you to whip your head. Hurriedly, you made your way to the door and leaned your shoulder against it as you made sure it was locked.
You cleared your throat, “Yeah?”
“It’s just me,” you saw the locked door handle jiggle as you heard a soft laugh on the other side, “Mat’s not with me.”
“I don’t trust you.”
You heard another laugh, this one more gentle, as Tito reassured you, “He knows about your superstitions, he wouldn’t try and sneak a glance.”
You thought about turning the best man at your wedding away, but the more you thought about it, the more you trusted him when he said Mat wasn’t with him. Mat knew you had certain superstitions you didn’t mess with; like lifting your feet up when you drove over railroad tracks or how you threw salt over your left shoulder if you spilled it.
He had learned all of those things about you.
The click of the lock coming undone caused you to hold your breath. Slowly, you cracked open the door and peered out the tiny slit with one eye. Tito had his face pressed close to the crack and you saw him close up. He didn’t pry the door like you thought, so hesitantly, you opened the door as you looked both ways to make sure your fiancé was nowhere in sight.
With the door fully open, Tito’s smile was brighter than you’d ever seen it before. He let out a low whistle, “Are you sure you I can’t marry you?”
Tito’s teasing had been a constant in the years of your relationship with Mat, and for better or for worse, it was about to extend into a lifetime.
You shoved his shoulder with your left hand, the engagement ring Mat picked out for you sparkling slightly in the light, “Shut up.”
“But really,” Tito slid both of his hands into the front pockets of his pants as he shook his head in disbelief, “You look beautiful. Mat won’t know what to do.”
“Hopefully he’ll say I do.”
Tito chuckled at your comment and then the two of you stood in silence. But when he slightly bowed his head and awkwardly rocked on his feet, you knew there was a purpose for his visit when he looked up at you.
“There is…Mat…” He took a deep breath, preparing himself for your answer, “He wants to talk with you.” Your eyes bulged out of your head as you immediately stepped back into the private room and went to slam the door shut. But Tito stuck his foot out in time to stop the door from slamming shut, “He’s not here––he’s still out there talking with people, but he heard you got here early early started sweating, and he just wants to hear your voice––”
You shook your head behind the door, “No.”
“C’mon,” Tito pleaded with you, “I’m sure it’ll calm you down to hear him––”
“What if he sees me?” You exasperatedly said, “Even if it was an accident. That would––”
“He won’t,” Tito’s voice held just as much firmness to it as he had confidence in his best friend, “He knows you too well to break your superstition.”
He knows you.
Hearing Mat’s voice would calm you down, but the anxiety of him accidentally seeing you before you walked down the aisle was too much. It was almost too much nervousness for you to handle on your own, so with a deep breath and a silent prayer that this wouldn’t blow up in your face, you whispered to Tito that Mat could talk to you.
Tito had spun around to retrieve Mat before you could finish your sentence. He rushed away from you, afraid you would back out on your word. But just as fast as Tito ran away, you slammed the door shut and relocked it.
You turned around and leaned your back against the door. Pinching the bridge of your nose to relieve some of the stress, you let out a deep breath. With only a few moments to yourself, you did a few breathing exercises before a shallow knock sounded from the other side of the door.
“Uh, Y/N?”
You could pick out his voice from anywhere, and you let out an audible sigh of relief, “Mat?”
He also let out a deep breath, and you could picture his shoulders relaxing at confirmation he didn’t walk up to an empty room. You turned around and placed your hand softly on top of the door handle; resting your forehead on the door you whispered, “I’m so nervous.”
“So am I,” Mat let out an airy laugh, “We’re the ones who decided to marry each other, yet we’re both a mess.”
You replicated his laugh and it went back to silence. You had spent years together with Mat, but no silence had ever been more poignant than this. You could hear his love, almost feel it, but you couldn’t see him. Not yet.
It was his trembling voice that broke through the silence, “Can I hold your hand?”
“Mat––”
“I’ll turn around,” he rushed out, knowing how strongly you felt about this superstition, “You can stay behind the door––just with your arm sticking out––We can both turn around so we make sure we don’t chance anything, because I––” he cut himself off, calming himself down with a single breath, “I really need a hug, but we can’t do that.” He let out another deep breath, “Please?”
You loved him more than anyone else in the world, and in turn, you would do anything for him; including holding his hand.
You couldn’t wipe the smile off your face, and you were positive he could hear it, “Turn around.”
And with a click of the door unlocking, you opened it just a sliver of a bit open and turned around yourself. You stuck your left hand out for him, and in an instant, his hand found yours. You felt tears well up in your eyes out of happiness, because even though you could feel him now you still couldn’t believe you were going to spend the rest of your life with him.
You filled the silent void with your voice and added a futile point to the non-existent conversation. But you wanted him to know this about you, “I showed up to our first date twenty minutes early.”
Mat chuckled as he repeatedly stroked his thumb on top of your engagement ring, “I know.”
You squeezed his hand, “You know?”
Again, Mat let out another soft laugh, “I was thirty minutes early to our first date.” You felt your wide open mouth transform into a smile, “I was across the street and saw you waiting.” He lowered his voice, “I was so scared.”
You were convinced that was maybe the only thing he didn’t know about you, but he proved you wrong. Time and time again he proved himself to know you better than you knew yourself.
“Tell me something I don’t know about you,” you whispered.
“You know me better than anyone else.”
The way he continued to trace around your engagement ring caused your heart to squeeze; it only made you more excited for when there would be a second ring on your finger, “There has to be something.”
You felt your heart pound against your ribcage as a few beats of silence passed over. From his drawn out silence, you knew he had something, you knew he was debating on whether to tell you or not.
“The picture we took together at the first hockey game you came to,” you could hear the shy smile on his face, “I’ve kept it in my locker since then.”
You felt your heart melt and chin wobble; this was something new you were learning about him.
“And I…” He let out a nervous laugh, and ever since the first time heard the sound of it, it was infectious, “I have it with me now in the inner-pocket of my jacket.”
A lone tear trailed down your cheek as you tried to sniffle the rest of the tears you felt behind your eyes away. It was your wedding day, of course you were going to cry, but you didn’t think it would be this soon.
Mat’s hand briefly dropped yours as you heard a crinkle of photo paper being taken out of Mat’s jacket pocket. You felt the corner of a piece of paper hit the palm of your hand a few times. Gently, and without looking down, you took the picture from Mat’s hand. And when you brought the picture up to your face, you squeezed Mat’s hand hard as an audible gasp left your lips.
The two of you looked so young. Which made sense considering the picture was taken a few years ago. You smiled at the memory as if it happened yesterday; you in your #13 Barzal jersey, tilting your head toward Mat as if you were leaning your head on his shoulder if the plexiglass wasn’t there. Hayden had taken a hundred pictures of the two of you, but this was different than the one you kept framed at your office.
You looked the same, but Mat looked different.
He still had his hockey stick in hand, but instead of looking at the camera like you, his head was faced down toward you. His eyes were locked in on your smile, wide in admiration. His closed-lipped smile was bashful, but you could clearly see the happiness radiating off him. That day, while you looked into the camera, still high off excitement from watching him on the ice; he looked down at you with all the love he held for you in his soft eyes.
“I even take it with me on road games.”
Tracing your fingers down the worn down, slightly torn up, and bent edges of the picture, you felt another tear roll down your cheek.
While you wanted nothing more to look at the well loved photograph of the two of you in love before either of you knew it, you didn’t want to cry too much before walking down the aisle. You handed the picture back to him so he had it for safekeeping, and squeezed his hand again.
“I love you so much,” you breathed out.
“I love you, too.”
As the two of you continued to hold hands until Mat was called away in order for you to start the last of your wedding preparations, you learned that Mat cherished the small moments. Whether he wanted to memorize the first time he fell in love with you by carrying around a photograph from early on in your relationship, or how he wanted to hold your hand before the two of you committed to a lifetime together…You learned more about him in those moments than ever before.
And when Mat would eventually slide a ring onto your finger––and you to his––it felt as if the rings held a promise heavier than til death do us part. From the moment you met Mat until now, the most important thing you learned about him was how good of a friend he was to you.
You couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life as his friend.
#mat barzal#mat barzal fluff#mat barzal fic#mathew barzal#mat barzal writing#mat barzal imagine#mat barzal blurb#mat barzal oneshot#mat barzal one shot#mathew barzal writing#mat barzal x reader#mathew barzal x reader#mathew barzal fic#mathew barzal fluff#mathew barzal blurb#mathew barzal one shot#mat barzal new york islanders#mathew barzal new york islanders#isles#tags are the worst thing i hate them so much but!! gotta play the game#anyway!! i need to stop writing bc i am creating unrealistic expectations of men in my head that will only lead to disappointment!!!
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Just a Dare | Nathan Prescott x Reader
@trueloveknifefight asked, Also can I request Nathan asking you out?
here u are! i love writing convos w nathan UGH i adore his character.
as always, replies and reblogs are greatly appreciated1 i check all tags and comments <3
wanna support me for just $3? here's my ko-fi!
The lights were bright, vivid. Almost blinding. They dance LED accents into the reflection of your drink- a dull plastic cup filled to the brim with one part whiskey, zero parts mixer. The taste could bring a tear to your eye but you would be damned to water down such fine alcohol, provided by none other than Nathan Prescott himself.
Music reverberated along the pool rooms walls, laughter and hollers distantly rising with the tempos. Your foot absently tapped to the beat- you were never one for dancing. Never one for parties, either, actually, favoring drinking in the solitude of a small friend group.
If not for Nathan you wouldn't be here at all. Some would say it's a privilege to slip past those heavy doors, entering the dully lit world of the Vortex Club. You mostly just felt like it was all for show. Somehow securing a place among Nathan's friend group, and a good friend at that, it was almost duty to show up. He insisted on it.
So, here you were. Leaning against a wall in a suffocatingly warm, cramped pool room surrounded by a sea of faces you hardly recognized.
That was, until you saw Nathan's face peer through the small break in shifting bodies. You knew him all too well.
Strikingly handsome, equally strikingly pompous. Funny, crude, an absent minded party goer just as much as he was a fireball with racing, incoherent thoughts. A drinker, a druggie. Takes the edge off, he says, but you think he does it to take away his thoughts completely. You felt like his entire life was all edges, never sacred ground.
The poor bastard.
He lures your attention in as he saunters over with squared shoulders, narrowly avoiding spilling his drink when a random student cuts it a little too close. Normally Nathan would make a bigger deal, give him what for, but this time he just shoots the poor kid a menacing glare and grumbles, 'fucking watch it'. He's walking with purpose and intent, you can see it on his face. You must have a target on your forehead as he darts straight over.
When he comes to your side, his own alcohol dripping down the sides of his cup onto his wiry fingers, you raise a brow.
"Something wrong?" You ask, as he takes a spot leaning against the hard wall right next to you.
"Just wondering why you're being so fucking lame over here," He shouts over the music, taking a sip of his drink, grimacing at the taste. "We're all having a good time over at the lounge and you're over here acting like all the other wallflower nobodies."
You roll your eyes with upturning lips. "Maybe I like being a wallflower. I like people watching. I see things no one else does."
"Yeah, okay, fucking weirdo."
"I mean it," You push off the wall and grin. "Look-" You point to a student obviously wasted, drink held high over head while he lets the music take him away. "That guy is clearly trashed- he's having the time of his life. He's gotta be seeing double."
Nathan whistles at his state, taking in the guys goofy smile, half lidded eyes. "I'll bet it's the triplets. I could breathe on him too hard and he'd fall over."
"You should go try it." You tease. He shakes his head and takes another drink.
"Nah, he'll get it himself. Guarantee we'll be dragging him out by his feet by the end of the night." He shrugs. "Or, at least someone will. I sure as fuck ain't staying that long."
You snicker. "What, got a hot date?" Nathan glares at you. "Oh don't tell me," you cup your hands to whisper, a secretive gesture, "homework?"
"Fuck no," He scoffs, and you can just barely see that he's a little more than tipsy now. His pale cheeks dusted with red, the tip of his nose ruby under the harsh lighting. It's also then that you realize he's a little more tense than usual, even despite the drinking. He's standing straight upright, his right hand gripping his cup like a crutch and his left now shoved hastily into his pocket.
He hasn't looked at you dead in the eyes yet.
"So what is it then?" You ask curiously. He shrugs and stares into his cup. You frown. "Bro, are you like, good right now? Do you wanna leave?"
For the first time since he'd wandered over, Nathan looks up at you. His eyes are unreadable, but his composure seems stressed. He shrugs again. Before you can even open your mouth to ask him about his state, he sighs and downs an entire mouthful of burning whiskey. It makes you cringe just watching him.
"Fuck it," He huffs. "Look I got some stupid ass dare to come over here and put the moves on you, okay." He sounds almost annoyed, like it's a hassle for him, or maybe embarrassing. You cross your arms. "I was dared to come over here and try to get you like, to fucking, you know, leave with me, but now that I'm over here I'm starting to think maybe that was a dumbass idea."
"Leave with you?" You say incredulously, a brow already lifting. "You were dared to come over here and try to sleep with me? By our friends?"
"No, no, fuck," Nathan seems agitated now, rushing. "Like a date sorta bullshit. Ask you out." He manages to get it out in almost the worst delivery possible, meanwhile you're just trying to pick out who would put him up to this. Hayden? Victoria?
A laugh forces its way out of you. "Aren't we a little too old for that game?"
Nathan shrugs. "That's what I said but they insisted. Fucking babies. At least make the dare a little more fun than just asking some bitch out. That's like elementary level shit."
Your eyes widen, you scoff. "Excuse me?"
Nathan sputters. "You're not some bitch, I didn't mean to-... Fucks sake, I'm clearly a little drunk right now okay, if you could cut me some fucking slack that'd be awesome."
"Hey man I didn't ask to be a victim of bullying," You tease, and he can't help but laugh. You soften. "Never expected it from you, though of all people. As ironic as that sounds."
"I'm not even bullying you, come on. Don't be a bitch. I even admitted it and everything."
You grin. "Yeah. Gotta say though, I'm a little disappointed."
"Oh what, you wanted to see my moves?" Nathan hums. "You wanted some Prescott action?"
"Shut the hell up." You shove his shoulder, an action that would be a mistake to so many others, but for you, it was welcomed. "I'm disappointed that it was just a dare. I'd probably have said yes if it wasn't. But, oh well."
Nathan doesn't answer for a long moment. First, he stares into his drink, processing. Almost like he hadn't heard that right, or like you were messing with him. It's rare to see Nathan Prescott stunned into a momentary silence. He's thinking, wondering what he should say next. Suspicious that you're just playing with him, hopeful that maybe you aren't.
And, you hadn't been. Truth be told if given the chance you would allow him to take you out for the evening. Show you fancy things, try out something a little more intimate than just laughter and poking fun at classmates together. You enjoyed his presence, looked forward to it at times.
A small part of you had hoped that he felt the same, maybe. Somehow. While grateful that he respected you enough to cut the crap before it even began, you couldn't help but feel a little... Disheartened at the prank. You'd saved your pride by denying him beforehand, but, if it had been genuine...
"So if it wasn't a dare," He began, quietly, barely audible over the booming music overhead. Eyes barely visible in the sea of vibrant lights crashing like waves. "You'd have said yes."
You shrug, trying to play it casual to save your own feelings, just in case. "Probably. I mean, we're already friends. We have fun so it couldn't have been that bad." He nods along to almost every word.
"Well what if we did it anyways." He blurts.
"Did what?"
"Go out tonight. Like, you know ditch this lame ass party and have some real fun."
"You love this lame ass party, and plus," You shake your head in feigned annoyance. "I'm not sleeping with you, Nathan."
He glares at you. "Fucking duh. I'm just saying we can go and hang out somewhere else. This party happens all the fucking time so it's not like we're missing anything."
"But, wouldn't that make me the butt of our friends joke?"
He shrugs. "Fuck em. It was a dumb dare anyways."
"Now it seems like you're trying extra hard to convince me to say yes." You state, and he's frazzled, running lines through his brain to try and save the absolute failure of asking you out. You decide to spare him, take a little leap of faith for yourself. "But, alright. I'm in."
Nathan gapes at you. "You're in?"
"Yeah, why not. I'm not busy right now and if you're not either than," You smile. "Why not. You better wow me though, Prescott. I'm talking a night to remember. Fireworks, dinner by candle light, a serenade. The whole package."
Nathan's eyes light up, but he tries to hide it, rolls those beautiful blues. "Well considering I've had like no fucking time to prepare how about we instead go to the roof and chill out."
You toss the idea around in your head for show. You already knew the answer the moment he asked if you were being serious.
"I mean I guess that would work," You say. "I was looking for fireworks but I suppose that will suffice. Feel free to go tell our buddies their joke may have backfired on them."
Nathan shakes his head. "Nah, don't even bother. They're all drunk and probably don't even remember daring me in the first place."
"Alright then," You push yourself off the wall, feeling your cheeks warm. A flutter takes wing in the base of your chest, your heart picking up just a little faster. You can't stop the smile that graces you as you say, "Lead the way, Prescott."
Nathan does lead the way. He takes your hand into his own, your fingers tracing over his boney knuckles as he drags you through the sea of bodies, out to the school hall and up winding stairs.
You giggle like a child when he struggles to find the correct key on the janitors ring he'd snatched weeks ago just in case, tease him when he almost spills his drink all over himself. Nathan's hands are almost shaking, but you chalk it up to the alcohol. You chalk everything up to the alcohol- his trembling fingers, his red face, a shy, albeit goofy smile resting upon his lovely, angular face.
The night was cool and crisp, a stark contrast to the smoldering heat of the Vortex Party.
He looks amazing out under the stars, and underneath the scope of the vast, black sky dotted with trillions of perfect, twinkling lights, you feel at peace.
Looking at him, you feel like this may be the start of something you'd denied yourself the chance of ever even imagining.
Out there, alone but together, hearing the echoes of music mixed with the livelihood of crickets in the darkness...
it truly was a night to remember.
-----------
Days later, you sit atop your desk, feet tapping rhythmically on your chair, typing away at your phone.
"Love the top," A familiar voice pipes, and you glace up to find Victoria standing before you, books pressed to her chest. She takes in your shirt, a nicely fitted long sleeve with a rather low cut v-neck. "Why haven't I see that one before?"
You shrug and set your phone down. "Never got around to wearing it I guess. Not a big fan of V-necks."
"It fits you," She sets her books down at the table beside you and brushes a hand through her hair, making sure every strand is in line. "I'll have to get one myself."
"You know what, you can have it after today," You say, and she perks up in disbelief. "As a thank you for what happened at the party."
That disbelief soon turned to confusion. "...Meaning?"
"Y'know, making Nathan ask me out. He made a whole huge deal about it- said you guys were drinking and playing Truth or Dare of all things. Gotta say, I was a little surprised."
Victoria's brows knit. "We hardly drank at that party, and I wouldn't be caught dead playing Truth or Dare. That game is for kids."
It almost knocks the wind out of you.
They hadn't even been playing in the first place.
As the teacher walks into the room, the first period bell blaring annoyingly over the speakers, you climb off your desk and prepare for the day, hardly able to contain yourself. It hadn't been a dare, after all.
And, you and Nathan's official second date was merely a day away.
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“Smells Like Teen Spirit”; Chapter 9: And I Forget Just Why I Taste
New chapter is up!
This one came out 4.6K words which I’m pretty sure is my longest chapter. Jesus, I swear I thought this was gonna be shorter.
I’m honestly so excited for where this story is going and I feel like an evil mastermind because I know how it’s going to end and I’m just struggling to keep all these secrets to myself!
But please read it and comment what you think so far, I am motivated and fueled by comments! :)
Not much changed after Caroline found out about Junior being inside of a Good Guy doll.
Lexy made her promise not to tell anyone, making her cross her heart-which Junior had to admit was cute to see-, and everything was good. He still stayed with Jake and Devon but also spent more time coming into the first week of December at Lexy’s house as well.
Junior would help Lexy with homework and usually spend time gossiping with her. They would usually skirt around the obvious topics, anything related to possession or Chucky, even about their relationship that sometimes seemed like they were more than friends.
He was stupid when it came to dating but he wasn’t that dumb. He sometimes caught onto the way she would look or smile at him and how he never protested whenever she held or picked him up.
The doll broke up with her right before his mom died, yes. Their relationship wasn’t the best to begin with at the time, with her eyes wandering over to Oliver Hayden and then distancing herself from him. The latter was because of Chucky, he knew that now, but still.
Junior always tried to ignore how heartbroken she looked when he ended things. He almost wanted to take it back but couldn’t. He felt too hurt and like the world was falling down around him.
The world soon did crash on him later that day before it all went right down to shit.
But it was still something they didn’t talk about. It had been three weeks, but maybe it was too soon. Besides, he didn’t mind how their friendship bordered on something more. It was just a hint of hope that he could try to hold onto for now, even though he was a doll.
Well, a guy could dream, couldn’t he?
As for the whole situation with Caroline…
I wanna be where the people are, I wanna see, wanna see 'em dancin'!
Disney movie marathons certainly were a thing between them and Junior was never able to complain. How could he? It had been years since he watched a Disney movie, and to indulge in something that was considered childish while sitting down on a couch with a kid right beside him was actually quite fun.
This Wednesday afternoon, it was The Little Mermaid. It was definitely a favorite of Junior’s when he was little. There was something about a girl who wanted to be free and discover the world away from her overbearing father that he related to without even realizing it because he was so young.
Also, mermaids are just so awesome.
So that’s where they were, on the couch and watching a redheaded mermaid yearning to be part of the surface world.
Trust me Ariel, you don’t want to be part of this. Junior thought to himself as he sipped his soda, through a blue straw because Jake thought it would be funny when it gave the can to him, probably to make him feel childish. But instead, Junior just accepted it without giving his cousin the reaction he wanted.
His disappointed face was priceless and definitely worth it.
Lexy, Jake, and Devon were in the kitchen, his ex-girlfriend refilling the popcorn bowl that Junior and Caroline devoured fairly quickly into the movie, while his cousin and best friend were working on their homework. Ha, schmucks, still needing to go to school and do homework everyday. That was a perk to being dead.
While the others were forced to continue their education, the doll and the seven year-old stayed quiet as they watched the movie. As Ariel continued singing “Part of Your World”, Junior found enough strength to begin quietly singing along under his breath.
“Up where they walk, up where they run, up where they stay all day in the sun. Wanderin' free, wish I could be part of that world.” Singing in front of people was still something Junior wasn’t used to.
He kept his singing a secret ever since his dad started to pressure him into cross-country. No one had heard him sing since then. Even now, singing around a child had him feeling nervous and he was fidgeting with the the zipper of jacket.
The doll noticed Caroline looking at him from the corner of his eye before she also started to sing along with him, making him relax.
Okay, maybe this wasn’t so bad.
It was just Caroline after all. He still wouldn’t sing in front of Jake or Devon, especially Lexy. It just made butterflies-no, wasps-swim around in his stomach at the mere thought.
But to sing along to Disney songs with a little girl without any ounce of judgment in the world? That was nice and maybe something he could get used to.
“I got more popcorn!” Junior suddenly heard Lexy’s voice as she came out into the living room and he immediately stopped singing, which earned a frown from Caroline.
“Why’d you stop singing?” Caroline asked him, making Junior start fidgeting almost nervously.
“I wasn’t singing.” He denied.
“Yes you were, I heard you.” She insisted, almost stubbornly.
“You were singing?” Lexy asked him, putting down the bowl of popcorn in between her little sister and her doll ex-boyfriend.
“Nope, I wasn’t.”
“Mommy said it’s bad to lie.” Caroline stated and Junior fought down the urge to sigh loudly.
“Juni, I’ve never heard you sing!” Lexy whined while sitting down beside him on the couch.
“And you never will because ‘Part of Your World’ just finished.” He replied, crossing his arms over his chest.
Lexy pouted at him. “That’s so not fair. You’ve heard me sing but I haven’t heard you sing yet!”
“I never forced you to sing in front of me, that was on you.” Junior pointed out, even pointing a tiny finger at the blonde and she simply rolled her eyes.
“But still. So not fair.” She huffed. “Well, then I guess I’ll have to listen to you sing the next song.”
Junior was quick to shove a handful of popcorn in his mouth. “Nope, sorry, can’t do that while I’m eating.” He replied, speaking with his mouth full and the blonde scrunched her nose up in slight disgust.
“You’re so immature.” Lexy decided to respond with, making the doll smirk childishly because yes, he was immature. He never was really allowed to be immature until now, so he was taking advantage of it.
They were quiet for the next few minutes, intently watching the teenage mermaid pine for a human prince that she just met until he felt a hand on the back of his head.
“Jesus, Junior, when’s the last time you brushed your hair?” Lexy asked him and she was rewarded by his silence followed by the slurping sound of him sipping in the last bit of his soda.
“Seriously? Your hair’s a tangled mess.” To prove her own point, she ran her fingers through his hair and almost immediately her fingers got caught on a knot, causing Junior to hiss from the small amount of pain and swat in the direction of her hand.
“In my defense, hairbrushes are bigger than my own head now. It’s not easy holding it properly just to brush my hair.” He defended himself, pulling away so his hair could be hand-free.
“I could brush your hair for you if you want.” Lexy offered with a soft smile, a look of amusement as well in her eyes.
The doll thought about it before shrugging. “Yeah, sure. Why the heck not.” Junior always made sure not swear in front of Caroline, which was quite interesting since he was a very frequent curser.
Especially whenever Jake was in the room.
His cousin somehow managed to bring out the more feral and chaotic side of him.
Lexy smiled and nodded, quickly getting up and going upstairs to her room. Junior put down his empty soda can on the floor, he and Caroline sharing the bowl of popcorn before his ex-girlfriend came bounding down the stairs.
In one hand, was a bright purple hairbrush. In the other, was a little bag filled with multi-colored hair ties.
Realization slowly dawned on the doll and his blue eyes went wide. “Hey, hey, hey, I only agreed to the hair brushing part, not anything else!”
“Juni, you have great hair, and I’ve been wanting to play with it since forever!” Lexy whined, pouting at him.
Junior recognized what she was trying to do, trying to sweet talk her way into playing with his hair, and he quickly shook his head. “No, no way, I’m not going to fall for that any…more…”
Lexy’s pretty hazel eyes were wide and she was still pouting at him, giving him that same look that always had him bending to her will. He growled under his breath as he struggled, feeling grateful that Caroline was too distracted by The Little Mermaid to see his inner-and external-turmoil.
Unable to resist those eyes, he sighed loudly and huffed. “…fine. Just this once.”
Lexy immediately stopped pouting and grinned. “Still works like a charm!” She bragged, putting down her supplies. “Do you want to sit on my lap? It’ll be easier for me to braid your hair that way and you can keep watching the movie.”
That was definitely a question he was never asked. He rubbed the back of his neck and nodded. “Okay, whatever. Just don’t pull my hair or else we’ll stop completely.”
She rolled her eyes but agreed, picking the doll up and placing him on her lap as she sat beside Caroline. Junior crossed his arms over his chest, keeping his eyes on the tv and was absolutely determined not to enjoy this experience.
That proved to be a lot harder than he thought.
Lexy was careful with his hair when she started brushing, working through all of the knots gently until it was all completely tangle-free. He had to admit, his hair felt a lot softer and almost silkier once it was neat again.
He used to frequently brush his hair when he had been alive, making sure it looked perfect and flawless, but it did become harder to hold a hairbrush and he just ended up giving up on it.
And when she began braiding his hair, Junior felt like it was melting. They were small braids due to the length, but Lexy’s fingers moved expertly and didn’t tug on his hair too much, which was probably to make sure that the doll wouldn’t change his mind and leave. After making a couple more braids, it caught Caroline’s attention.
“Can I help?” She asked, the movie now being completely forgotten.
Lexy didn’t hesitate to agree and even though the doll wasn’t looking at her, he knew that she was grinning ear to ear. “Sure you can! Do you remember how I taught you?” Caroline was quick to nod this time, her fingers finding its way to his hair and began braiding.
She wasn’t as precise as Lexy, Caroline’s braid being looser and a bit sloppy, pulling a little too much that it would have him wincing, but Junior didn’t have it in him to even care. Because it was actually really fun. It was fun having his hair being braided in a way that his father would hate.
It was fun to let loose and let himself be dolled up, pun intended.
But he’d die again before admitting how much he was actually enjoying this.
“Lexy, I can’t believe you ditched us,” Junior suddenly heard Devon’s voice, footsteps approaching, “you left us alone to do our homework, I know you still got work to do too—” his voice trailed off when he caught sight of the doll.
Junior, hair braided neatly on one side and messily on the other, with the hair ties that were colored purple, pink, blue, red, and yellow being noticeable at the ends of his dark brown hair, sitting on Lexy’s lap and had an almost emotionless look on his face.
Devon tried to suppress his laughter, putting a fist to his mouth before pulling it away. “Oh my god.” Was all he could say before a single laugh did escape him.
“He looks pretty!” Caroline chimed in, looking proud of her handiwork as she continued to work on the next braid.
“Yes, yes he does.” Devon replied, looking at the doll with an almost desperate look. “Junior, please let me take a picture.”
“Only with your eyes, because that’s the only picture you will ever get.” Junior told him, raising an eyebrow stubbornly.
“Oh, c’mon, really Junior?” Devon complained, but the doll was determined to hold his ground this time.
“Yes, really. You get a good look at this. You will not take a picture of me, I don’t need that kind of blackmail in my life.”
“But, Juni, you look so cute!” Lexy said before she and Caroline both finished braiding all of his hair. “All done! Now let us take a picture!”
“Thank you for finishing the braids, but no thank you for the pictures.” Even though she was done braiding his hair, Junior still didn’t move from her lap. “I’m not budging on this one.”
The doll heard Jake’s phone ring from the kitchen and a few seconds later, his cousin answered it. He didn’t pay it any mind, figuring it was Miss Fairchild anyway, so he continued to argue with Devon and Lexy about not wanting his picture taken.
After a moment, it was Jake’s rapid footsteps that cut them off, his hand shaking slightly around his phone. “Junior, wou—” he froze at the sight of the doll, his eyes looking like it was bouncing from one emotion to the other.
“…okay, we’re gonna talk about…” he waved his other hand around to gesture to Junior’s braids before continuing, “that later, but first…would you like to explain to me why there’s a…killer actress calling me on my phone, asking for you?” Jake was practically speaking through his teeth right now, an obviously forced smile on his lips.
Oh shit.
No wonder Jake looked so pissed.
Even with the movie playing, the room suddenly felt quiet enough that you could hear a pin drop and he could feel Lexy and Devon staring at him in complete shock.
Junior smiled innocently, chuckling a little nervously under his breath before hopping off of Lexy’s lap. “Heh, yeah, uhhh, about that…yeah, I got nothing, let me just talk to her.”
Surprisingly, Jake actually did give him the phone and Junior took it, walking into the kitchen and finally spoke into the phone. “Tiff?”
“Jun-Jun! Hi!” Junior automatically smiled when he heard her voice, filled with pure enthusiasm, having grown completely used to it by now.
“Hi, Tiff…I thought I told you not to call me first?”
“You still haven’t told your friends that you’ve been talking to me?” Tiffany questioned.
“I…haven’t really gotten around to that. They’re just very…cautious. And overprotective of me.” Junior explained as he flicked off a braid that was a little too close to his eye.
“Well, I can understand their reservations. But I was just too excited that I had to call you, sorry!”
“What’s gotten you so excited, Tiff?” The doll asked as he chuckled quietly under his breath because Tiffany really did sound excited for some reason.
He heard some shuffling, muffled whispers of “tell him, you tell him” being repeated until a new voice was heard. “Hey, Junior.”
“Oh, hi, Nica. What’s going on over there?” Junior asked, sounding almost amused being he could hear Tiffany giggling excitedly in the background.
“Not much,” Nica responded in a casual tone, “I’ve just been here, spending time with Tiffany…and we did get that…rat problem fixed.”
The doll squinted, spending a good five seconds in silent confusion before the lightbulb suddenly went off above his head. “Oh…oh! Oh shit, really? That-that’s great!”
He couldn’t believe it, but Tiffany did it. She actually did it. Successfully removed Chucky’s soul from Nica’s body.
No wonder Tiffany was so eager to call Junior and let him know of her accomplishment.
Nica chuckled at his reaction. “Yeah, it’s definitely great to…have my house back.” She certainly sounded happy and it got Junior smiling more. Nica was a good person, he knew it.
She deserved to be free from Chucky’s grasp.
“I’m happy for you, I really am. You and Tiff.” Junior said truthfully. He really hoped that with Chucky no longer being in the picture that Nica and Tiffany could sort out whatever sexual tension is there.
Yeah, perhaps it would be better to stay with Jake and Devon for now and not deal with…whatever those two women will be getting into.
They talked for a few more minutes before hanging up, Junior walking back into the living room and handed his cousin his phone back. He sat down on the couch, not looking at the others but he could feel them staring at him.
Maybe, if he focused hard enough on Ariel being lured to Ursula’s lair by those evil little eel fuckers, then they would just leave him be.
Unfortunately, that didn’t seem to be the case.
“Junior…can we talk in the kitchen please?” Jake asked in an obviously fake happy tone, most likely in an attempt to not worry Caroline.
Junior paused, twiddling with his own plastic thumbs. “I mean…I already left the kitchen and I just sat down…so maybe later—” before he could say another word, Jake quickly grabbed him by under his arms and walked off.
“You son of a—put me down! Right now!” The doll snapped, kicking and hitting his cousin as much as he could while the other just continued walking into the kitchen. He could hear Lexy telling Caroline to keep watching the movie, because “they were going to have a little chat”, and then she and Devon joined them in the kitchen.
Jake put the doll down once they were in the kitchen, Junior fixing his shirt and glaring up at him. “You do not have Junior Holding Privileges! Don’t do that again!”
“Why does Tiffany have my phone number?” Jake demanded to know, completely ignoring his cousin’s angry statement and glared back down at him.
Junior rubbed the back of his neck, shifting from one foot to the other as he started to look at everything but his friends and cousin. “Well…that might be because…I may or may not have been calling her from your phone…”
“How often have you been calling her?” Devon asked, looking almost concerned.
“Every day, while you and Devon are having dinner with Miss Fairchild.”
“Junior, are you kidding me?” Lexy whisper-yelled at him, running a hand through her hair.
“Did you guys actually think I was going to stop contacting Tiffany while I was staying with you guys?” Junior asked them with a painted eyebrow raised.
“Yeah, pretty much!” Devon replied.
“If I didn’t update her every now and then about what’s been going on and how I’m doing, Tiffany would be personally coming over to check on me.” Junior said seriously, sighing. “Look, it’s not a big deal, okay?”
“Not a big deal?” Jake repeated. “Junior, she’s a murderer!”
“And so am I.” The doll reminded and they all went quiet. It was like they all wanted to forget what the doll did. Forget that he did kill his father.
But Junior would never forget that. Now he knew what he was capable of if pushed too far.
“You’re-you’re not like her. You’re not a serial killer like she is.” Devon said to him in a way like he was trying to get through to him.
“You don’t get it, do you? Tiffany saved me. She saved me.” Junior emphasized. “If she never came to the hospital with a soulless Good Guy doll, I would be dead. I wouldn’t even be here, talking to you guys, hanging out with all of you, if it wasn’t for her. I don’t care what she’s done, she is still a good person.”
They were all quiet for a moment before Lexy spoke up. “But, Junior…she was working with Chucky. Married to him also, and I really don’t want to know how that’s possible, but she was basically his partner in crime. How do you know you can fully trust her?”
“Because she’s not with Chucky anymore. She literally decapitated him.” Junior said and Devon nodded in agreement, obviously remembering that moment in Charles Lee Ray’s old house. “And she literally called me to tell me that she got Chucky out of Nica’s body. She found a way and now Nica is free.” He tilted his head slightly. “Would someone who still works with Chucky do that?”
He was greeted with silence and it made Junior believe that he was finally getting to them. “Look, I’m not asking you to put all of your trust in Tiff. I know why you all are hesitant and don’t trust her. But what I’m asking is that you trust me.” He paused. “I won’t let anyone hurt you three again. I swear.”
That seemed to calm them down, whatever anger or disbelief they had slowly disappearing. “Junior, this isn’t just about us,” Jake started, “we don’t want anything to happen to you either.”
“Jake’s right,” Devon agreed, “we thought we lost you forever, but we didn’t. We just got you back.”
Lexy gave him a gentle smile. “I just…we just don’t want to lose you.” Junior caught onto how she corrected herself. He knew how much it hurt Lexy to lose him in her arms, how it must’ve broken and devastated her.
But he would do it all over again if it meant saving her life.
Junior smiled at them softly. “I know. But I’ll be okay. I do trust her and I know I’ll be fine.” He reassured them. “So I’m going to keep contacting her while I’m staying here. Or else I’m sure she literally will come down here herself to make sure all my limbs are still attached.”
“You always make it sound like you’re not planning on staying here for long…are you really going to go back with Tiffany?” Jake asked him, his eyebrows scrunching together.
Junior shrugged his shoulders. “I mean…are you guys planning on keeping me as a collector’s item? Become some sick version of a family heirloom? I can’t stay with you guys forever. At least with Tiffany, known for carrying around Good Guy dolls, can have a reason to have me and give me a roof under my head.”
“Do you think that we can’t give you that? Like…like a home?” Devon asked him and it made Junior fidget with his sleeves.
That was a hard word for him. Home. He never knew the feeling of a stable home. Hell, he didn’t even even know what it meant to have a home.
“It’s…it’s not quite home with Tiffany,” Junior admitted, “I don’t even know what home is. But it’s close. Honestly, it’s close with all of you. So let’s just…focus on now. The present. I’m here with you guys for now. Isn’t that enough?”
“I-I guess so…” Lexy said, biting her bottom lip, “but when you go back with Tiffany, you’ll still keep in contact with us, right? And-and let us see you?”
Junior smiled and reached up to gently pat her knee in reassurance since he was much too short to reach her shoulder. “Of course. Who knows, maybe we can set up some schedule or whatever, alternate who gets me for the week. I don’t know. But let’s just move forward and forget about it, okay?”
Jake sighed before nodding. “Yeah, okay…one one exception,” he paused dramatically, “you let us take a picture of you in your adorable little braids.”
Junior gave his cousin a cold yet deadpanned expression. “You guys were planning this, weren’t you? While I was on the phone with Tiffany and Nica, you three were definitely plotting this.”
Lexy gasped in mock surprise. “What? No! We’d never!” She lied quite obviously.
“You guys are literally the worst, there’s no way I’m doing this.”
“C’mon, Junior, just one picture! Please!” Devon begged, even putting his hands together and pouted.
While his pouty look wasn’t as convincing or easy for the doll to give in like Lexy’s, he let out a very long and loud sigh before throwing his arms up. “Fine! Fine, whatever! Just one picture, and that’s it!”
“Yes!” Lexy cheered as Jake was quick to pull out his phone, crouching down to get a better angle of the doll.
“Say cheese!” His cousin exclaimed, even shooting him a smile from behind his phone.
Junior’s response was to give a half-smirk, holding up both of his middle fingers. “Suck this.” He said instead and Jake took the picture.
Jake just sighed and looked at the picture on his phone. “Fuck it, this will do.”
Then, Devon pulled out his own phone. “Okay, now all of us!”
Junior immediately took a few steps back and held his hands up. “Woah, woah, woah! I said one picture!”
“But, Junior, there are literally no pictures of the four of us!” Lexy pointed out, giving him a persuasive smile. “Please? Just one of all of us, the amazing Chucky Killer group?”
The doll couldn’t help but to snort at the name. “God, that sounds like an awful name a rock band would have.” He joked lightly before he, once again, gave in. “Okay, but make it quick before I change my mind.”
The others immediately crouched down, Lexy actually sitting down beside Junior, all of them having at least an arm or a hand around him. For the umpteenth time already, he would deny how nice it was to finally have some real friends who actually cared about him.
He didn’t want to get all soft and mushy over it, so he’d keep those thoughts to himself until the end of time.
“One, two, three, cheese!” Right as Devon was about to take the picture, Lexy turned her head and planted her lips on the doll’s cheek. Junior, who had had amusement in his eyes and a small smile, now had his mouth open and blue eyes as wide as golf balls.
Fucking Lexy and her fucking ability to still have Junior be weak and turn his legs into jelly.
“You good, Juni?” Lexy asked him with an innocent smile, as if she didn’t just kiss his cheek.
“Yeah!” He practically squeaked out and his voice cracked so he quickly cleared it. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good…let’s just, uhh, get back to the movie, I don’t wanna miss the ending.” He managed to say, ignoring how his cousin was giving him a shit-eating grin, the same one Junior would give Jake whenever he and Devon were being cute and gross.
“You’ve seen The Little Mermaid before, Junior.” Devon said in an amused tone, obviously catching onto how flustered he was getting.
“And I’d like to watch it again, let’s go!” Junior replied and rapidly started walking back to the living room. He could hear Lexy asking his cousin and best friend to send the pictures but he didn’t pay it in any mind.
Instead of going back to do their homework right away, the three of them stayed with Junior and Caroline in the living room to finish watching Ariel and Prince Eric’s love story.
And if the doll saw that Lexy had the new group picture of all of them as her Home Screen on her phone and the Lock Screen remained a picture of Junior when he was human and Lexy, him placing a kiss on her cheek rather than the other way around?
Well, Junior didn’t say anything.
#Luna talks#admin#Chucky#Chucky 2021#Chucky tv series#Junior Wheeler#Lexy Cross#Jake Wheeler#Devon Evans#Caroline Cross#Tiffany Valentine#Nica Pierce#fanfiction#fanfic#fic#fix-it fic#Junior puts his soul into a Good Guy doll au#AU#alternate universe#archive of our own#ao3#smells like teen spirit
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@starry-sky-stuff asked me about my top 5 mother-daughter relationships in historical romance. Sadly, the genre offers very few picks since most heroines either have dead mothers or barely have a relationship with their alive ones. But here are the best ones, IMO:
1. Georgiana Pearson and Caroline Pearson (Never judge a lady by her cover) - I love how much narrative weight it has. Indirectly, Caroline's existence and Georgiana's love of her is the drive behind six freaking books. (The last two of the Love by Numbers series since, let's be honest, if it wasn't for Georgiana's choices, neither of the two couples would have ended up together. And of course the entiee Rules of Scoundrels series where Georgiana always influences the plot.) I also love how, despite how much Georgiana loves Caroline, she is not a perfect mother, being broderline an absentee one before the book. I love this flawed, but heartwarming relationship :DD
2. Eveline Armstrong and Robina Armstrong (Never seduce a scot) - I love how Robina was half-ready to defy king and country to save Eveline from an arranged marriage. And they were so sweet together! Although, this is another imperfect relationships since Eveline decived her mom for years and Robina never realized it, I love it for its flaws.
3. Winnifred Humphries and Imogen Humphries (Lord Holt takes a bride) - This was the only book where I found the parents as interesting, if not more, than the protagonists. At first, I thought I will dislike Winn's mom for how she always insulted her and undermined her confidence without realizing and then we find out that she just wanted a daughter who would be more tough and accepting of criticism than she was. I really liked how Imogen figured out she was in the wrong and tried to do better. Still wish we got more scenes between them.
4. Marianne Draven and Primrose (Her protector's pleasure) - Another one where the mother is the protagonist. Finding Primrose is Marianne's entire motivation and I liked her relationship with motherhood. Sadly, Marianne and Primrose don't have many scenes together, but the ones they do were pretty heartwarming.
5. Wren Hayden and Lady Hodge (Someone to wed) - This one is from the no good, very bad category. It's clear Lady Hodge scarred Wren for life and it's fascinating. I have a soft spot for heroines with mommy issues, and Wren had a ton of them! I also found Lady Hodge herself fascinating -even tho I have a few qualms about her character and exactly what message the author tried to convey with it- which is very rare for heroines' mothers.
Honorable mentions: Annabelle and Phillipa Peyton - who don't get enough narrative space as they should considering how awesome Phillipa is- and Georgiana Pearson and the Dowager Duchess of Leighton - who don't even interact but I find intriguing since Georgiana clearly took after her mom more than one would think at first glance.
#hr thoughts#my thoughts#georgiana pearson#eveline armstrong#winnifred humphries#marianne draven#wren hayden
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December 14th: 🎶
Arlene: Move your butts!
Eltanin: Yes boss!
Hayle chuckles as he watches them carry all the treats needed for their Christmas movie marathon. It had been Eltanin’s suggestions, and of course his sister had not been hard to persuade. Chris came walking behind them, while Hayden and Vy had set up the living room so that it felt like one huge couch they could all sit in, rather than the normal separate ones.
Vy: Tada!
Arlene: Wow! This is so awesome!
Hayden: All Vy’s idea. -he smiled, sitting in what was his spot, with Felix on his lap.-
Vy: You helped!
Eltanin: Are River and Lucas joining?
Chris: They said they would come after they were done.
They put things on the table in the middle of the sofas, then found their spots in the sofa, Hayle holding up a list of movies that they wanted to watch, it was a long list, so he doubted they would be done with it in one sitting. Just as he was about to say what movie to start with, the door opened, and Lobo came running inside, followed by River and Lucas, who had Munchie with him.
River: Sorry we were a little late, we needed the last member to join. Couldn’t leave the kitten alone for too long.
Lucas: Oh wow.. -he noticed all the candy on the table in the middle, popcorn, chips, all sorts of sweets. As well as the decorations already up.- This is such a cool thing to do.
He followed River, the two finding a spot to sit, Munchie curling up next to Lobo who mostly eyed the chips just in case.
Hayle: Well as I was saying.. Here is the list.. Do we start at the top, or do we randomly pick one?
Chris: Could cut the list, put all the things in a hat and see what we get.
Eltanin: I’ll get scissors!
Arlene: I’ll get a hat!
Hayden: I think a decision is made. -he chuckles, taking Vy’s hand.-
They watch as the kids cut up the list and put it all in a hat, deciding that Lucas draws the first one.
Lucas: Polar Express is the winner!
They all hunkered down as the movie started playing, as one was done, a new note was picked from the hat and so the evening and night continued.
(In the hat, for those wanting to know: Polar express, Love actually, The Holiday, Home alone 1 & 2, A Christmas Carol, Miracle on 34th street, How the Grinch stole Christmas, Arthur Christmas, The Santa Clause, The Family stone, The nightmare before Christmas, Klaus and The Christmas Chronicles)
#the ward legacy#simblr#simblrstories#ts4 story#ts4 alpha#ts4#co created with mahvaladara#Christian Ward#Hayle Ward#River Ward#Hayden Ward#Yvreon Ward#Fannar Ward#Flynn Ward#Arlene Ward#Eltanin Ward#Emil#Lobo#Felix#Lucas Sunstar#leave it to this family to have a all night christmas movie marathon#also known as the movies I watch before Christmas#although not in a marathon#but over time
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The Curious Case Of The Fur Babies
Author's note: Today is the birthday of one of my favorite people here and I wrote this for her. @thequeenchoices migaaaaaaaaaaa! Happy birthday! I know I owe you Hayden x MC Christmas fluff, but here's something else I've been working on. [Leading characters are owned by Pixelberry Studios and original characters are creations of the author]
Book: Perfect Match
Pairing: M!Hayden Young x F!MC (Natasha)
Rating: T
Word count: 1307
Summary: Hayden is a little worried about his pet child behavior lately. But his certainly not ready to fin out what is going on with Dipper.
A salty and fresh oily smell spreads in the air while Natasha turns off the stove burner and pours melted butter over the bowl of popcorn. Movie nights with Hayden became more common than either of them expected once life returned to normalcy in New York. Given how their lives were turned upside down after they started dating, normal and boring days may be just what they need.
Picking up the bowl, Natasha returns to the living room and takes a seat next to her boyfriend, who's looking through the options in the movies catalog of the streaming app.
"Okay, popcorn and drinks are ready. Now tell me what we're going to watch," said Natasha.
"Twilight saga."
She doubles over. "Really?"
"I know online reviews and people nowadays say it's a terrible story. But it has been trending on Quickflix for weeks. It kinda made me curious."
"Well, when you put it that way…" Natasha ponders about it as she pours orange juice in her glass.
"So, is it a yes?"
She nods.
"Awesome!" Hayden smiles proudly, picks up the remote control and presses play.
Along the movie, the couple comments on a few scenes and laugh. Still, Hayden's eyes eventually land on the corner of the room, where his border collie sleeps soundly. Between the second and third movie, he makes a beeline for the corner, then crouches down to pet the dog.
"Babe?"
"Yeah?"
"Everything okay?"
Taking his time to respond, he stands up and returns to the couch. "I don't know… Don’t you think Dipper's behavior is strange lately?"
"How so?"
"She sleeps a lot, she gets tired easily and she's cranky sometimes. Normally, she would be with us here, interrupting the movie to play, asking to be petted, sleeping here near me." He looks down his hands then glances at the dog still sleeping.
“Hmm…” Natasha looks away, lost in thought.
“What?”
“It’s probably nothing, but I noticed she’s eating a lot lately. She threw up this morning…”
"Ugh..." Hayden whines.
"We should take her to the vet. Maybe it’s nothing, but we can’t be too careful, right?”
"Yeah, I guess…" His shoulders slump as he sinks into the couch.
"You know what?" Natasha stands up. "We should go right now."
"Now?" He stares as his girlfriend in confusion. "But how about the movies?"
"Dipper's health is more important. Go get your wallet and her documents while I get her travel bag."
Hayden nods in agreement and quickly grabs everything he needs to take his dog to the vet.
Later that day
"I'm sorry… Dipper is what now?" Hayden asks as he tries to absorb what he just heard.
"Your dog is pregnant, Mr. Young," the veterinarian says with a smile.
Hayden sinks into the chair near the gurney where Dipper lies down, letting out a yawn as she rests her head on her pet parent's hand.
"Really?!" Natasha grins.
"Yes. Though she didn't cooperate during abdominal palpation, all her signs check and her blood test came out as positive," the vet explains.
"Yeah, sorry about that, Dr. Sanders. Usually, Dipper is more docile." Natasha simpers.
"It's alright, Miss Park. Some dogs experience these mood swings during pregnancy. She's definitely not the first dog that doesn't like palpation exams."
"Can we know how far long is she?" Natasha asks.
"Well, she hasn't gained much weight yet, but she already has vaginal discharge, so I'd say she's about a month pregnant."
"Does it mean she'll deliver in a month?" Hayden inquires.
"Something like that. We should take Dipper to the other room where we can confirm her pregnancy through the ultrasound," the vet says.
"Sure. Let's do it!" Natasha beams.
"Excellent. I'll see if the exam room is ready and be right back."
"Thank you, Dr. Sanders."
"Of course. I’ll give you three a minute."
As the veterinarian leaves, Natasha turns to the dog with a broad grin. "Giiiiirl! You're going to have fur babies!" She cheers and pets the dog, who wags her tail.
Her pet parent, on the other hand, still seems somewhat lost, fiddling with the ends of his scarf.
"Hayden? Are you okay?"
He gives his shoulders.
Natasha approaches her boyfriend and cups one side of his face. "What's going on, babe?"
"It's nothing. I'm just trying to understand how."
"You know how..." She gives him a knowing look.
"Fine…” He makes a face. “But when?! She never leaves my side when we go out for walks. She only was in heat once. Then Sloane told me Dipper was in estrous cycle last month. I think..." He scratches his head in confusion. "I should have scheduled her spaying sooner…" He says, running his thumb between the dog's sleepy eyes.
"Babe, we had a lot going on ever since we returned to New York. You're getting your engineering degree, you decided to move out and live by yourself. Then I moved in…" She smiles softly, caressing his cheek. "You heard what the doctor said. Dipper is healthy, she is eating well, she has the right weight. Now we just have to take care of her so she can deliver healthy puppies."
Hayden lets out a tired sigh.
"Come on… Don't tell me you're not even a little excited to see new cute furry faces in one month," Natasha says, nudging him playfully.
Hayden looks back at his dog and a coy smile spreads on his lips. "Maybe… She will have the cutest puppies."
“Of course she will! Look at this adorable face!” Natasha blows an air kiss to the dog, who wags her trail frantically.
Just then, the door opens. "We're ready to take Dipper for the ultrasound and hear some heartbeats. Will you help me take her to the other room, Mr. Young?" The vet looks at Hayden expectantly.
"Yes." With a resolute nod, he stands us, picks up Dipper and turns to Natasha. "See you in a few minutes."
Eight weeks later
"Oh my God! They're too cute!" Nadia squeals holding one of the five Aussie Collies near her face. "You are too cute! I just can't with you!"
"I can imagine how much trouble they get you, but oh man!" Steve beams petting another one of the puppies. "When did you say we can pick one?"
"Six weeks. They'll be bigger and more independent then. The change will be less hard for them," Hayden smiles idly scratching Dipper's fur.
"I always preferred cats, but Dipper definitely changed my mind about dogs," Sloane adds.
"Wait until you take one of Dipper's puppies home. Hamza will lose it," Natasha jokes.
"Oh, he already is. That's why Khaan and I didn't tell him the puppies have born. He'd want to go back home with one of them. And we're soooo not ready to have a puppy at home now," Sloane shakes her head frantically, making everyone laugh.
"So… Did you figure out who mated with Dipper?" Steve asks.
"Yep. It's our landlord's Australian Shepherd. He helped with some of the vet bills and will stay with one of the puppies too," Natasha explains.
"Oh, he's pretty! Nice catch, Dipper!" Nadia winks at the dog.
Everyone chuckles.
"Okay, I think it's time to let Dipper feed the puppies," Hayden announces as he stands up to give space for the tiny dogs to follow their mother to her bed.
"Aww… Hayden is a protective pet parent. That’s so cute!" Nadia praises as everyone leaves the spare room Dipper is with puppies.
"He seems pretty attached to them. Are you sure he's going to agree on giving the puppies away?" Sloane whispers.
"He was struggling. But I reminded him that we live in a small apartment and we can't have five mini Dippers growing as big as she is and making as much mess as she does," Natasha murmured.
"Good call," Sloane nods, suppressing a giggle.
#choices fanfic#choices perfect match#perfect match fanfic#hayden young#m!hayden x f!mc#lorirwritesfanfic#lorircreates
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Hello!!! I am Scarlet and I am your OC Bingo Card Buddy and my questions for you are what would be on the top five songs for Kelly & Michelle in Caught In The Crossfire
Hey there!!!
So Michelle and Kelly are @asirensrage 's girls. I can't answer for them, but --- I do know Ridea has some 🎵killer awesome Spotify lists🎶, and probably has some real bangers to answer this with.
To continue to knock off boxes on your bingo card though, here are five songs that I've used while writing for Hayden:
1.) Vertigo - Alice Merton
2.) Underworld - CYPRSS
3.) Now's My Time - Valley of Wolves
4.) Smile - Wolf Alice
5.) Fallin' (Adrenaline) - Why Don't We
I can't pick top five - I have more songs than I can count, and I may have a problem - but these should be a good rep. (As I probably forget an essential song somewhere; ADHD you are a cruel mistress)
#oc bingo 2022#I'd rather hear about Michelle and Kelly too#lets be honest here#😂🤣😂🤣😂#no worries - I've been crash coursing this as well#I just started writing#so everybody is new to me
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#157 - The Right Kind Of Laksa
It’s no secret that I think Masterchef is one of the family friendly shows that I’d hope parents would introduce their kids to. Though I haven’t watched all the seasons....Hayden Quinn is one of the people I recognise and found myself watching an episode of his show which featured laksa.
Though I’ve eaten a fair bit of them....I wouldn’t necessarily pick the dish if I had a choice. My recent theory is that previous ones I’ve had were too spicy. So if you are planning to add that specific dish in your menu (or specifically have spicy dishes) remember other humans who have a sensitivity to spicy things. My view might be different if all the spice had been put in a little dish for me to add as I consumed what was in the bowl.
PS: Probably the biggest reason I haven’t attempted the dish after seeing Hayden’s segment is how complicated it is (I need a mortar and pestle!?)! I’m more of a ‘no fuss’ cook and prefer stewing things for 4 hours compared to using all sorts of tools (like needing to wash the food processor each time!)...
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Note 1: If I had a chance to stick a sticky note, that had ‘awesome’ written on it, on something or someone (There’s an ad that had people walking around with sticky notes one them that said ‘like’ —- was it from Canon?).
I do know that because this would be a long list (10,000 WHAT!?), there is a chance that I may double up (or triple? I hope not!)…so I give you my blessing to give me a ‘stern talking to’ if you do spot duplicates.
To get all the other entries: just click here.
Note 2: At times I get asked about all sorts of connection about the project — I’m going to say that the biggest connection would have been me listening to Neil Pasricha’s TED talk. Since I was doing the 10,000 Notes (the goal is now 50,000) of Encouragement at that time — I thought I’d mirror that same number
PS: Somehow #58 & #93 doesn’t show up even with the tag. :(
#Awesome10k#Awesome Meals#Awesome Food#Laksa#Spicy Food#Spicy Things#Restaurant Feedback#Restaurant Ideas#Hayden Quinn#Masterchef#Cooking Shows#Cooking#Yummy Food
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3, 4, and 5
List your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with: oh boy I've got a ton of fandoms so I'm just going to do top four fandom's and characters i identify with from each
Top four fandoms and characters i identify with from each: actually this is a tough one so a fandom I just got into is The Magicians which is awesome and I'd say I guess i identify with quentin coldwater, next is Percy Jackson and the Olympians and I identify with Annabeth Chase, third would be Voltron: Legendary Defenders and I identify with Lance Mcclain, and I guess last would be The Maze Runner but I'm not sure who i identify with from that one. i guess I identify with Thomas and have days where i have to keep moving and find a way to push through even when things seem at there darkest.
Do you like your name and is there one that you think would fit you better: Yeah i love my name but if I could pick another one I really wouldn't. I'm happy with my name but I can kind of see myself being a Hayden or Victoria to. Well I've been told I look like one anyway.
Do you think of yourself as a human being or a human doing and do you identify yourself by the things you do: yeah i would say I think of myself as a human doing. I mean the way I see it you can't grow up just to be something great but you can push your limits and keep working to mold yourself into the person you want to be.
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