#have more shit me and my roommate say

[dennisboobs]

.

#the reason cisswap lesbian macden does nothing for me is bc i get my dose of lesbianism from canon charden <3 #i say it (jokingly) all the time but i think if the sunny fandom was more open to charden y'all would have more fun #everything ppl do with macden to make it ~more fun~ is literally. already there with charden #macden is a lot of fun in its own way but if i want butch/femme lesbians i have charden already-- #this is literally why i ship both. if i want to fuck around with gender i can throw charden together #if i want to fuck around with weird codependent loser roommates i can throw macden together #they have different dynamics and both bring different shit to the table #also idk such a massive part of dennis is his (often unapologetic but still stifled) more 'feminine' gender expression #so making him a cis woman who likes being feminine is like. yea. that sure is. cis woman dennis. #as someone who has an extremely complicated history w expressing femininity or anything that is even seen as being remotely femme #it doesn't grab me #the genderfuckery is not there #but TRANSBIAN CHARDEN???? YEAAAAAH #i think mac being so focused on upholding traditional mascilinity IS a very interesting dynamic to have next to. you know. dennis. #wheras charlie could not give less of a fuck #i think gender exploration with macden would take a completely different form but still be extremely interesting for both of them #but there's a lot less initial acceptance and a lot more hiding on den's part #especially if the two are in a relationship #because mac coming to terms with being gay took so long so dennis being at all feminine or even transfem is like #mac needs to do. more introspection #which is an entirely different set of issues to charden gender exploration where like #charlie being nonconforming. not shaving. not caring abt using she/her pronouns. being nontraditional in every way and not giving a fuck #would be absolutely fucking absurd to dennis who is very conformist after she comes out #and would probably be content to conform to whats expected of her as a woman with mac IF she did manage to come out at all #bc dennis would have to actually manage to come out. instead of hiding the fact she's trans > looking at carmen and the way mac treated her #i think both paths have additional challenges and that's. you know. whats interesting. #is cisswap den butchy? does she hide her masculine interests? is denise transmasc...?? #cisswap mac being butch is like. you know. nonconforming so it doesn't quite do the same thing as canon mac either #mac being Traditional and catholic and having to push past homophobia (internalized and externalized) to be himself is. pretty huge #would cisswap mac be a tradwife. like. thats sort of the equivalent

[leverage-ot3]

got my rib tattoo fixed. never getting a colored rib tattoo again fuck dear god that hurt like fuck

#dear god that hurt so fucking much way more than when I got it first done #the color HURT #at first I was fine but by the end I was squeezing my roommates hand so hard like SO HARD #I was groaning a bit and yelping and saying ow it was NOT fun #do it for the aesthetic #I actually got the tattoo at the same place like four years ago l #I actually got that original and my first tattoo like four years ago and it was kinda a shit show #I said I was fine with any of the people and then the guy that they gave me barely spoke english so I couldn’t communicate with him #and tell him what I wanted and he didn’t go deep enough I think #and I’ve been sad and kinda salty for years and never would have went back but my roommate got a piercing there and I told them about it #and they said they would fix it for free!!! AND THEY DID!!! #but it hurt sooooooooo bad #like SOOOOOOOO BAD #not leverage #jackie talks #about me #mine

[lovevalley45]

so i might have to finally go to my RA abt my roommate and it makes me feel like such a bitch but like. is it really worse than wanting to throw smth at her

like it’s gotten to the point where i have to wear earbuds to bed because she talks so loud. keep in mind this isn’t even who i share am actual room with, and i can hear her. i’m at my breaking point

#alli says shit #it’s like i can’t keep complaining and doing nothing abt it #n i know that’s what an RA is for but it makes me feel. small #like i’ve been trying to be the bigger person this semester and it’s not working #it just makes me even more angry #i might ask my mom what to say bc she was an RA #but damn #it’s fucking wild #it just feels terrible! #if she was a bitch maybe it’d be easier but she’s nice #she just also drives me insane #idk i just need to get it off my chest #i think i’m just worried it’ll also all blow back on me and then she’ll hate ME #even though i’m just like. i wanna sleep. i want to not have to have my earbuds at full blast to get some peace #i want u to clean ur goddamn desk n stop making it everyone else’s problems ants got into ur snacks #it’s just. killing me #like i forgave the roommate who got me sick faster

[lynxalon]

have to rehome the cats :(

#lynx speaks #its complicated but essentially both rommates agreed we'd take in morrigan #one roommate is allergic so is taking meds to help with that and at one point we had the kitty food #that helped with the cat allergens but. couldnt get more after the first bag #and then morri had faun and now that she's about a month old she's real playful #and. ya they kinda just hate the cats #which SUCKS bc i love them their my babies #im not gonna put them over my allergic rommates health but im just sour cause they both happily agreed in the beginning #and thats the part that gets me #that we were agreed and at some point the cats were only mine and ive done everything for them and i still lose them #cause i dont know anyone who would take them for a bit until i got my own place #so theres only rehoming #its just. bitter. im just sad #im gonna be alone again #thank fuck i have a doctors appointment soon and hopefully will be getting back on meds #and istg if either roommate sees this dont say shit im complaining and crying where it doesnt matter let me be human and sad #its no secret i love these cats so obviously im put out by losing them. leave me alone n dont talk about the cats :(((

[skrunksthatwunk]

just found out rascal (babycat)'s been with his owner this whole time instead of my roommate which is. something. :|

#if you dont know whats happening basically mr and my roommate (dorms) have been raising an abused kitten belonging to our floormates #we had him for a month and a half i think and then a month of break has gone by with my roomie staying on campus and me going back home #to my prey-driven dogs and snake and cat-allergic mother among other things. hence the inability to really take him in easily. #i mean shit. if she decided to actually take care of him instead of making everyone around her into free childcare then that's a good thing #*petcare #and admittedly both me and my roommate should've been more in contact about him whether this was going on or not #we both have really bad object permanence + flow of time issues though so it kinda... didnt happen #i thought about him a lot though. i planned on coming back early to spend a few days just chilling with him before the semester started #but other stuff got in the way and i had the 'its too late so dont ask at all' guilt #idk. it seems like hes alive but i don't know much more than that rn. it makes me nervous yk #but i never thought she'd just. still have him. i never expect what she does with him tbh #i almost feel better about getting stuck and not figuring out visiting or shared custody (in my house that is Not Ideal For Him) knowing it #wasn't even really attainable but. shit. #i want her to treat him like he deserves and if she's doing that i have no right to complain. he's not my cat. he's not. #but it means she'll probably just leave with him someday. no thanks or payment or future contact. idk i just. thought this would end sooner #in taking him to a shelter or a new home or us taking him in or her putting her foot down. but instead it's like im drowning in gelatin #what am i even doing. i love him. so much. and i want a cat so so bad. i want *him* so bad. #but i didn't rescue him and i didnt even try and. god idk. i love him and i still couldn't get my ass up to visit in a whole month #i want to say it's because i was stuck and it's not untrue. but i just. idk. i still feel like i shoulda pushed through or whatever anyway. #it makes me feel like im just as bad as his owner when i know im not. im not. #he's probably a lot bigger now. assuming she's actually feeding him. god. i really thought he'd be with my roommate #for reasons im not even gonna bother getting into. and i was reassured that my roomie would tell me if something was up with him. and she #didnt. and im not mad at her it's not her fault i didn't reach out when i wanted to know. but i feel just. ough. stupid ass situation i got #myself into. stupid sad ass consequences of being nosy and big hearted and wanting to help in stupid ways #at least her dogs didnt eat him. i was worried about that. i don't think i could take it if she got him killed and i didn't push harder to #help him. but i can't just fucking. kidnap him. he's not mine and we're neighbors and i can't even keep him at my home. not really. #god i miss him so much. i hope i didn't hurt him by leaving. fucking hell. #but he needs somebody and his owner is almost certainly not it. and maybe im not either but i want to try for him. man.

[anirudhpisharody]

i know it's just how some people are and comes down to personality but god i fucking hate delicate girls. and i don't mean physically weak girls or whatever i mean girls that haven't raised their voice a day in their life and avoid walking on the grass like the plague. and there's nothing inherently wrong with being like that but it infuriates me so much like where's the LIFE in you. and why do you get to be the perfect societal standard for womanhood?? meanwhile i'm over here shoveling dirt into my mouth and sounding like a possessed demon when i get mad at my mom and you're making me look bad!!!

#i know how this sounds i know but it's how i feel #i think this also just has to do with my past personal experiences with girls like this who were also judgy as hell #way too many perfectly delicate on the surface girls have talked shit about me behind my back #and then said passive aggressive things to my face and trying to monitor my behavior #and THAT SHIT made me more angry than anything ever has bc don't you dare make me feel like less of a girl bc i don't act perfect #i thought i was over this bc it was mainly just a thing back in my early teens when i was having internalized sexism problems #but i've been thinking about it and i realize it happened again a few weeks ago with my roommates #where they confronted me and told me they felt uncomfortable bc i was being 'hostile' #aka not smiling and saying hi every time they walked into a room #but yeah the girls that are like this that aren't judgy about it are usually very sweet but it still makes me angry #also hate that i'm 21 and still feel this way #i'm too old to be as angry as i was when i was 13 #shut up hanna

[seilon]

just wrote like three paragraphs ranting about my living situation and deleted it just know I am going insane and i hate it here and I need to live by my fucking self or I am going to absolutely fucking lose it

#I can not stand cleaning up shit for people anymore I can’t stand people taking my stuff or messing up shit I clean or organize or whatever #I hate feeling pressured to stay in my room constantly because she almost never fucking leaves and the entire living room/kitchen area is #apparently her fucking home office now. so there’s just nowhere else to go where I’m not forced to interact with her #not to mention how I cleaned out that entire area EXTENSIVELY only a couple months ago and now all of that work is just gone #she re-cluttered it and now it’s a nightmare again :) #and she’s out there in the first place because she clutters her room and desk in her room to such an extent that it’s basically unusable #at least when I had a shitty roommate her mess was confined to one side of a bedroom more or less #and there was a living room/kitchen that wasn’t a fucking nightmare that I could generally control the tidiness of #I can’t fucking live like this I can’t keep cleaning and cleaning and cleaning and throwing away shit and organizing shit and whatever #just to have it all be for NOTHING every fucking time because she takes more shit out and doesnt put it away and buys more shit #that we can’t fucking afford and don’t immediately need and hahaggsgsgshsshshhhshshshshssh #I can’t fucking do it! I really can’t keep doing this it makes me violently angry and one of these days I’m going to snap and break my door #or something #I didn’t even want to move back in here to begin with this was supposed to be temporary. as in only for a couple months #but all my job applications fail and I have no other form of income or support so. haha I’m stuck here #i won’t even get started on just #not wanting to live with her for a million other reasons #I need to get the fuck out of here I do not want to be responsible for cleaning up her messes and doing whatever she says without choice #cause I mean. that’s another thing. At least my roommate couldn’t force me to do whatever she wanted with any resistance being seen as #criminally disrespectful and depending on her wildly unpredictable mood maybe she’ll verbally abuse me or degrade me or accuse me of things #who knows! #also won’t get into the fact that I’m almost two years on t and she still misgenders me and deadnames me and believes she has the right to #do so #kibumblabs #negative #delete later probably.

[snekdood]

Im never even really upset about losing the things people steal from me, im always more upset that they feel the need to do that and all the deception and destruction of trust that goes along with it. Its genuinely upsetting for me, and so far, none of the shit anyones stolen from me has been for like. An actual justified reason. At least steal some fuckin food or something.

#yall come in here probably believing the shit ppl say about me being rich #not for a second coming to me to figure out my situation personally #only to come into my house and learn i have nothing to fucking eat. which is prolly why you steal shit you dont need but know it will hurt #me emotionally still for you to take. like its an abuse tactic sweetie you're not the revolutionary larper you pretend to be if ur robbing #from people who are what. slightly above you because i have a place to stay? #i guess we're ignoring that where i live isnt exactly the msot Expensive apartment in the world? #given the many bug infestations and everything falling apart and this place being built back in the fucking 60s or some shit #like idk what world yall live in that you think doing this shit to me is somehow you Kicking It To The Rich People #bitch you! do! not! know! my! fucking! situation!! eat fresh shit!!! #but yknow. i guess im just the richest man in the world because i love in a shitty single bedroom apartment intstead of with a roommate #or whatever dumb backglips we're making today #live*. backflips*. i hate my phone. i miss small phones #like. sometimes my mom helps me. but i need yall to underatand that the only money i have control over is my own #i desperately need you to understand this. im literally fucking begging you to THINK about this situation more. #i dont get to decide what my mom thinks is worth helping me with or not.

[vulpinesaint]

no actually you see it's a simple misconception. i'm not learning french to be fluent i'm learning it to impress pretty girls

#valentine notes #LOVE speaking a little bit of french for a girl and having her go omg... #that post miffy reblogged for me ab knowing weird stuff and being a little bit flirty as the point of life was so right #told a girl once that she was pretty in french when i first met her and she straight up told me she was going to flirt with me #shout out to livia. #also miffy thinks my accent is nice!!! which is soooo affirming for me #being a pretty boy who speaks french is like. whooo hey gender #like romeo spoke french i just know it. #anyway daydreaming about saying loveydovey stuff in french to my roommate (not anymore but she is forever my roommate to me) #we bonded so much because i helped her with her french all through freshman year nd she said i was the only reason she passed #and SHE thinks i sound nice too and that i'm really good with the language and FUCK dude that's so nice to hear #anyway. madelyn mon amour... je t'aime... #i need more excuses to speak french y'all better start asking me to say shit #ppl irl need to start asking me to say some stuff in french to prove that i speak it. fr. #YES my go-to is always to tell girls that they're pretty. that's just the way i am

[neverendingford]

Fear drove me outside myself

arcing fountains and clotting rivulets.

.

Hopelessness caking to the denim of my favorite jeans

the conviction that I will never become, caked to the side of the tub in blackened flakes.

.

The thing I couldn't say in front of them

The thing I can barely say in front of anyone.

.

You stood in the dark and it pooled around you like water

Stretched and it rippled like a thousand stones falling into a pool

we share the same pool.

.

Can some water be wetter than others?

Your surface tension tighter than mine

your hydrogen bonds more electronegative

I could only be solute in your solution.

.

I said that I'm behind the curve

you said we are the curve

the water felt a little warmer then

#text post #poetry #color says shit #anyway having a trans roommate was the most therapeutic thing in my fucking life #turns out community is important who'dhavethunk #everyone asked 'why did you do this?' and I had a thousand answers and all of them were true but none of them were the right one #it's this. this right here. the sudden and overwhelming feeling that I would never achieve what I want #the feeling that I'll never become myself #I know you're not supposed to write metaphorical poetry and then immediately explain it but boohoo I'm journaling you can't stop me #I have more hope now. it's still gonna be a bitch of a journey but I have some hope

[pepprs]

posts like that break my stupid fucking heart lol. i hate being in this situation and i hate that i hate it because im convinced im delusional about how bad it is right now and that it’s my fault for being a terrible selfish daughter and also it could be SO much worse. but no im not entirely terrible or selfish and yes this situation is bad even if it’s not the absolute worst it’s ever been or ever could be. i know we’re working on fixing some parts of it but that does not negate that i am living a suffocated life right now and never have fully known that freedom even when i haven’t lived in this house and still have so much work to do to finally get it and im so overwhelmed by this that i keep putting it off and running away

#purrs #also it’s like.. how does ANYONE live without the autonomy and shit you inevitably get as an adult. or the way people take you seriously #more and give you space and stuff. because i know i will miss some aspects of living like this but i think life after this will be so much b #better and freer. yeah it’s scary to make your own choices and move your own ways but also ummmm i am not living in a good situation and #there are so many fucked up things happening here. also i was gonna say something else ughhhh what was it. omg #OH yeah well idk if this was The thing but my parents don’t want me to ever have a place of my own bc they’re worried about my safety. i am #also worried about my safety but i think maybe i would like some independence. and i can’t work it out in my head lol #OHHHHH WAIT i remember. ok. so also. im 23 years old. my mom moved out of her parents home when she was 25 but she was already like dating a #and stuff and i.. well you know. but it’s like im 23 but i don’t think im even going to be able to afford a place of my own that is also #nice to live in. so i am going to have to find a roommate which is fine and also i want one anyway bc again i think it’s safer living w #other ppl and not just me and i just have to make sure that my future roommate/s are like.. not as bad as my 2 roommates i had on campus LOL #but it’s like I don’t think im going to be able to even split the cost for a place that is more than just bedrooms a bathroom and a common a #area. and ite like. when in my life if at all am i going to have other rooms to furnish besides my own bedroom. and when in my life am i #gonna be acceptable to my parents to live by myself. and when in my life do i stop talking to them every single day and depending on them fo #for every single decision. when in my life is my mom gonna treat my 40 h/w job (that in fairness i just started and technically haven’t EVEN #starred) with the same seriousness as my dad’s 40 h/w job. and when in my life is this fucking pandemic gonna end so i can go to conferences #and not be a burden or a disappointment and when in my life am i gonna find a life partner etc etc etc. i know i sound naive ungrateful #entitled etc etc and i don’t know what to say about that other than that my mom would think the same and already does lol but im tired of #longing and i would like to be able to function at a bare minimum level of freedom and comfort <3 #delete later #also my parents don’t want me living in the city on top of not wanting me to live independently. so. lol <3

[thelastspeecher]

all right so for anyone who's been following the drama of my coworker who left me alone at a site while I was crying, it's been (mostly?) resolved

we had a nice long conversation with a neutral mediator present and have worked out a lot of things. enough that we'll be able to work together better, esp now that I know she has been avoiding me training her, and more importantly, know why she's been avoiding it so that I can fix what I was doing.

I have to turn the other cheek and take the high road, bc my coworker 100% thinks I'm some spoiled little brat whose anxiety isn't as valid as hers.

I'm a professional, and I'll keep things polite and amicable and make nice and everything, and she seems willing to do the same so. fingers crossed.

#how do I know she thinks I'm a spoiled princess and that her anxiety is more valid than mine? #well she went on and on about how her anxiety over me wanting to talk to her #was affecting her so much #but completely dismissed the anxiety I was feeling last week when I was having a panic attack and sobbing #and also she outright told me ''you've never had to do anything you didn't want to do'' #I pushed back HARD on that right away bc I refused to let that shit slide #she backpedaled a bit saying that she just meant at work #but that ain't true either girl! you think I WANTED to drive through a blizzard to stand on a roof and freeze my butt off? #ugh that was one of the most disrespectful things I've EVER been told #and I've been treated with disrespect a LOT #but whatever. now that I've vented to my roommate and my journal and y'all #(and will bring this whole thing up to my therapist at my appointment next week) #I'm going to move on and be positive and yadda yadda yadda #whine whine whine

[ficklepenguin]

so frustrated because i want to spend christmas with my roommate and his family has again invited me to join them and they'll pay for my flight and everything which i'm incredibly grateful to them!!! but his sister is insisting i come later than everyone else because she doesn't understand why he would invite "just a friend" and "it would be different if you were dating" girl expand your definition of family, it's more than just blood relations and romantic partners!!!

#i call him my roommate but it's really reductive and i don't really know what other word to use #i know there are terms for it and i'm familiar with them we just haven't talked about it #but in the end it doesn't matter because he's still family no matter how traditional or non-traditional our relationship is #and his sister is being really dismissive but also i don't know how much he's saying to her because i'm not there for the conversations #his parents may or may not get it but at least they seem to understand #they invite me to a lot of things and i don't know if his dad likes me or not but his mom is really friendly with me #he sayd his dad and sister have both said they don't have a problem with me personally #but i don't know if that's just them not wanting to talk shit about me to him #this is longer than the post and i still have more thoughts but whatever #penguin rambles #i don't like traveling alone especially on flights and last year i nearly had a panic attack #so i'm not looking forward to that #i feel like i'm acting ungrateful but it's just really frustrating to be dismissed just because we're not romantic partners

[kuiinncedes]

me going from being bored in my house all day to bored in my apartment by myself all day wow 😍

#i have no idea where my roommate is also i still like dont know ... how to live w a roommate i guess lol like #i would like to know if ur not gonna be here at night ...... esp when it's just us two in the apartment rn but anyway #i texted her last night when i was going to sleep and i was like hey dw about turning on the light and stuff if u get back when i'm asleep #lol and then she didn't come back and she hasn't responded :P ik she's been helpign friends move in and stuff #bruh i helped my brother move in yesterday and i was kinda like so jealous that he has his group of friends here #whereas i moved in and i didn't know anyone in my building and i hadn't rly talked to the ppl from my high school in a yr #and i like kinda panicked abt being alone a little bit but he has all his friends and i'm happy for him but bitch when can that be me #but also like he and his friends are all in the same residence hall and i was thinking like i can already tellllll y'all are gonna be the #guys being loud talking in the hallways at night lmfao #anwyay #i'm gonna try to do some research work since i don't have plans until the evening lmao thank god i have shit to do tomorrow XD #i don't mind being alone at all i do kinda like it but the fact that ig i could much more easily be out doing stuff w friends or something #more easily than at home anyway idk why do i keep doing posts like this lmao #jeanne talks #ALSO I GOT A COUPLE OF THOSE RLY NICE ASKS SAYING LIKE LIST 5 THINGS YOU LOVE OR WHATEVER I WILL ANSWER THEM AT SOME POINT I PROMISE #idk things i love apparently lmfao #IN CASE I FORGET AND DON'T ANSWER THEM SOON THO ILY THANK U <3

[tylerthirst]

so do y’all feel weird when you prioritize your feelings and take initiative or are you normal

#sooo i decided to text my ex roommate to tell her not to visit me (which she planned on doing) because she’s annoying and a bitch #<- i worded it in a mature way to make more palletable to her #cause like. she was always really rude to me and would constantly be extremely condescending to me and that went on for a while but for like #a solid 2 months or so i actually somewhat enjoyed her presence #but when she announced she was transferring it guess she just thought it was ok to be a bitch to me again which honestly really confused me #she was always trying to pick fights with me over stupid shit and would always invalidate my feelings and tell me i’m wrong for having them #but at the same time she was extremely clingy and controlling when i didn’t want to be around her which is 🤨 #anyway she responded to my message with a bunch of audio messages and honestly i haven’t opened any of th because i genuinely do not care #what she has to say. in fact i can predict what she probably said in them. i feel like she initially apologized but then tried to justify #acting like that. and honestly i don’t fucking care. lol! i don’t think i’m ever gonna open those messages tbh #i probably would’ve if she just sent a text like a normal person but now i gotta hear her voice for like 5 minutes #and that’s already hard enough because she talks like a stephan university character 😐 #thirst.txt #meh #i don’t feel guilty about it or anything i just feel weird. it’ll probably pass in like a week tho

[postalplants]

Venting again lol

How can "I don't think I'm more disabled than you," "I can't handle supporting you when you express symptoms of your disabilities," and "I can't handle you getting a service dog when I'm so disabled that I can't get a job" all be true? Throw in the fact that I didn't think that I could handle a job but had to for the sake of finances.

So I work, despite being so fucking exhausted by it and getting so fucking triggered every single shift I work. But I can't fucking say that! Because that's upsetting and destabilizing! You want me to be honest, but if you react like this to my honesty, how am I supposed to be honest??

I mentioned needing a service dog because I'm thinking about the fact that I'm struggling with my mental health and functioning but can't tell you that and I know that there are guarding and grounding tasks that a service dog can do that will help me do my job. And you know what! I need to get a second job because I give you the majority of my income and you still need more! You haven't asked me to get a second job but jesus christ you've done everything but.

#vent #im sitting in the work bathroom having an anxiety attack because my least favorite coworker wont shut up about me needing to retrain her #on things that ive already retrained her on while im on my fucking lunch. and it smells like shit in here and i want to cry. #and my body hurts so bad because ive been spending my days off working like a dog on things that need to get done around the house. #but i got told last night that im a deeply selfish person and all of the helpful things i do are just ways that i try to distract myself #from how selfish i know that i actually am. #the joke is that im so selfish because i told them that i need a car because i feel like i need to feel in control of my own life. #and thats selfish because apparently i control their lives by them driving me places and waiting at the hospital for me when im sick. #well. if i had a car you wouldve only had to drive me to & from my colonoscopy. and im really fucking sorry that i make your life harder #because im sick and disabled. im actually genuinely sorry and ive felt guilty for it since it happened and i tried to thank you for it and #ive been trying to do my part around the house to make up for it. and im glad that you finally confirmed that im a burden so that it #wasnt only in my imagination. you really feel like that i guess #god i cant SAY any of this because they didnt explicitly say that im a burden #they said that i controlled where they had to be when i was in the hospital and emergency room and had appointments. #its not a stretch to say that that implies that im a burden right? right?? am i crazy? #god i feel crazy. #and believe it or not these tags have NOTHING to do with the post lol. #also :) my other roommate wont talk to me until im adequately medicated :) #because im too much of a POS when im unmedicated for him to talk to me apparently. #and im the only selfish one because they give their lives up for me apparently? i guess i need to complain more about #how much effort i put in to try to help them? (i wouldnt actually do that because i dont DO things like that. even when ppl do them to me) #FUCK