#have i ever been truly happy

[supercom-pute-r]

Coming home from therapy with my eyeliner smudged by the tears, listening to mitski and wondering if i live a different, happier, life in another universe or if i'm the same, sad and bitter, no matter who or when or where i am

#i feel so sad i coud cry #again #i don't want to be home #but i don't want to leave it either #how long will it take till i'm happy again #have i ever been truly happy #or has something always bothered me #sad thoughts #eyeliner #therapy

[sporkberries]

There goes Antigone, off to pray

#been thinking alot about jon in the terms of a greek tragedy #his story and tma as a whole is undeniably a tragedy but jon... #he never has agency or choice in this he is quite literally doomed by the gods #even if he did prevent the eyepocalypse there was no happy ending for him that could ever be #he was well and truly doomed from the start #anyways i am very normal have some religious/catholic imagery #jonathan sims #tma #the magnus archives #spork art #eyes

[genderkoolaid]

okay something ive been curious about is how people feel about their self harm scars. because mine are really important to me and I honestly feel love for them, and i enjoy when they are visible.

also this includes people who have any kind of permenant mark from self harm. and tbh if you have only self harmed in a way that leaves temporary marks then feel free to answer this too, or if you used to have some but now they aren't visible

#also this is not bc i get a lot of compliments on them #lord knows almost every member of family has said Something about them & my mother made me cry the first time she saw them #but they are important to me and i feel comforted by them #they feel like something very personal & smth thats truly my own #i absolutely do not blame people for having any sort of reaction towards theirs #my cousin has been getting his covered by REALLY fucking sick tattoos n im very happy for him #im just curious bc i dont feel like ive ever seen someone talk about their relationship w their scars in a way that feels similar to mine #m. #self harm tw

[taikanyohou]

BOUNPREM + FILMOGRAPHY (2019- ).

“Everyday for the past three years, I always knew that tomorrow, there would be Between Us. When the camera turned off (after filming the last scene for Between Us), I felt my heart linger in that moment. I don’t know what the goal will be now tomorrow. More than having to wait, is the fear that there’s nothing now to wait for. So, what am I waiting for? My ultimate goal for the last three years has always been Between Us.”

#bounprem #boun noppanut #prem warut #asianlgbtqdramas #asiandramasource #* #faiza gifs #i just really wanted to make this bc .... like. between us is a passion project ... yeah. but thats LITERALLY what these have been striving #towards ever since their debut. and im SO happy it could come to life! #and in between that they got to grow SO much with the different roles they played that weren't team and win #BUT. team and win is HOME for them. #and if THEY BOTH found it THIS HARD to say bye to them I .. NO lets not even GO THERE. #but also! THEY'RE GOING TO GET SO MANY MORE CHANCES TO BE SO MANY OTHER CHARACTERS! #it can be so anxiety inducing not knowing 'what not?' BUT! THEY'LL BE OKAY! #anyway! like i say! they're truly SOULMATES in EVERY SENSE of the word and i cant WAIT to see whats next for them!!!!!!! #as individual projects AND couple projects!

[itsalwaysforyou]

hold me together.

kenny ortega, descendants 2 / holly black, red glove / nicole homer, underbelly / ada limon, a new national anthem / k c cramm, christmas eve forever / kenny ortega, descendants 3 / the crane wives, curses / silas denver melvin, let dead dogs lie / natalie wee, least of all

#descendants #descendants web weaving #jay son of jafar #mal bertha #jal #i think i have said everything i could possibly say about them #just. something about mal not telling jay she wants to go back to the isle #not even asking if he wants to go back bc she’s too afraid of the answer #he’s on sports teams and girls are fawning over him and shouldn’t he be happy? why would he want to go back? #and jay. remaining steadfast as ever in his loyalty CONSTANTLY #even when mal doesn’t tell him everything. even when she lies to everyone #he’s the first one to accept her apology. ‘you were just trying to do the right thing’ #like something about devotion corrupting. how jay just wants mal back again. no matter what she does he still loves her #(for better or for worse) #AND MAL LOOKING AT HIS FUCKING STATUE LIKE THAT!!!!!!!! #the one person who truly knows her. gone. he turned away from her before he was turned into stone #oougghhhh #and just. jays presence. the way he stands behind mal in it’s going down. waiting. #they’ve done this so many times before. they’re a well oiled machine. they’re fluid and fluent and have been doing this for a long long tim #anyway. them #jal renaissance baby!!!!!!

[anewp0tat0]

Happy New Year again to everyone, and especially all the wonderful chaps who made my time here enjoyable, I'm very greatful, and I'll of my work goes out to you!!

that there's just father cop and son cop, fighting crime. I swear that's all this series is.

I hope your coming year is better than theirs rn♡

#new year same catchphrase #happy new year!!! #I was gonna scribble this earlier but my family was talking for so long #Iwondered if i would ever come back home to my computer(and my BED I SHOULD HAVE JUST SLEPT ON THE FLOOR atleast it would have been honest) #im back now and so here's my first doodle of the year yay~~ #they're doing fine... just fine..... #and I hope everyone else is! truly!! #kuroshitsuji #black butler #kuroshitsuji fanart #fanart #sebastian michaelis #ciel phantomhive #digital art #o!ciel #doodle #dadbastian #i swear it

[worstloki]

My issue with Thor not ‘realizing’ why Loki was acting off in Avengers 1 isn’t that Thor didn’t recognise Loki was acting unlike himself—Thor did note that—or that Thor didn’t figure out what was wrong—he did try asking—it’s more along the lines of Thor giving up, and that he accepted Loki was bad now within two days while knowing something was off when Thor himself behaved just as bad for much longer before without any specific compromising event.

#Thor was happy go kill for so long and Loki waited for Thor to get better and then Thor KNOWS something is up #and he still accepts Loki is evil now and never questions or visits Loki in prison again #he moped around about it because of duty and depression but that he had such little faith in Loki #like either his little brother really did go mad out of jealousy and rage AND is permanently like that with no resolution between them #it’s ridiculous #I like the Thor in my head who never believed Loki had actually gone mad and went after the infinity stones bc he suspected #the one that would not only trust Loki to get them off Asgard in TDW but knew Loki had the throne after and let it be that way #bc he knows his brother and wouldn’t stop believing Loki can ‘get better’ even if he’d truly gone mad #like I get that Thor in Avengers 1 would have been conflicted and could’ve taken everything at face value #Loki was DEAD and now he’s not of course Thor isn’t going to be thinking straight #it’s easy to look at Loki and assume he spent a year plotting revenge after faking his death #but Thor had time after to cool down and only gave Loki a chance in TDW when there was no other option #like did he genuinely think Loki will try to kill him #is Thor scared of Loki now or what #Thor’s spending so much time thinking of what he’s lost that he develops depression but doesn’t ever voice or support the idea that maybe #Loki was forced to do the invasion #AFTER he asks ‘who controls the would-be king’ like come on Thor just ask a follow-up question #Thor autistic king distracted by ‘YOUR father’ discourse fr #T-T #I simply don’t think Thor would have given up on Loki even if Loki stabbed him sorry #it wouldn’t even be bc he’s naive it’d be because he knows and loves his brother #and he’d keep hoping for a change of heart #he wouldn’t ditch the issue unless it was to go under the radar and that’s never explicitly implied #unfortunately #:(

[chloecherrysip]

Mario watching his and Luigi's commercial in Punch-Out Pizzeria

#mario movie #mario movie spoilers #mario and luigi #super mario bros #super mario bros movie #super mario bros movie spoilers #cherrysip edits #if you got notifications about gifs from this set yesterday shhhhhhh i was having PROBLEMS #anyway i'm currently working on a gifset for the whole scene of mario getting back up in the pizzeria but then I HAD THIS IDEA #and i was like 'wow that sounds like a comparison that's going to cause me emotional pain' and i was right it absolutely did :) :) :) #[gesturing wildly to gifs while tears stream down my face] U DON'T UNDERSTAND MARIO IS IN THE EXACT SAME PLACE BOTH TIMES #the first time he's nervous but also SO excited and happy about what the future is gonna bring and seeing this commercial is #the culmination of everything he and luigi have been striving for and they're holding each other tight and the world feels wide open #and the second time everything is different. mario has been beaten down. he is terrified and aching and exhausted and convinced #that everyone has been right about him. he's a joke. he's a failure. the only thing he's ever done for his brother is drag him down. #but then he sees the commercial and everything comes back. the joy and the excitement and him and luigi against the world #the only difference is that he doesn't have his brother next to him and that's everything. mario doesn't feel whole otherwise #mario always does his best but when he and luigi are together working in sync he truly feels like anything is possible #and now his brother is out there somewhere in the chaos and bowser isn't gonna stop. he's gotta get up again. he does get up again. #IT'S A LOT BASICALLY. IT'S A WHOLE LOT AND I LOVE THEM DEARLY

[hueningkai]

happy birthday @choiyeonjuns !!

#tomorrow x together #yeonbin #yeonjun #soobin #txt #moasource #moacentral #txtnetwork #gif* #txt* #gif: yeonjun #gif: soobin #HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIVI!!!! #sorry it's not more exciting <3 but not being entirely back in the gif scene makes me rusty BUT i still wanted to make you something #you have been a constant in this tumblr's life and one of my first mutuals and i truly cherish you and your friendship and wonderful content #i hope you have THE best day ever!!!! full of love and joy and cake and txt!!! #also i see you got a new job! congrats<33333 ily #vivi day 2022 #txt's parents

[charlieconwayy]

fryleela meme ♥ [2/8 episodes] → season three, episode two "parasites lost"

#futurama #futuramaedit #freela #fry x leela #philip j fry #turanga leela #* #freelam* #half this list will be eps exploring leela's love for fry so here's one of my favorite “fry's love for leela” eps #constant confirmation that fry has loved leela from day one....he just didn't know how to properly express it #bc fry is an incredibly immature character and relationships for him have kind of just been easy #but leela changed everything for him #she wasn't someone he got instantly and kind of just used for sex #she was his best friend above everything and being around her made him want to better himself #he was inspired to be the best version of himself bc his love for her made him see the world in a new way #all of those things he said under the worms' influence were how he truly felt he just couldn't say them bc he didn't know how #leela was not attracted to the worms. she was attracted to fry's heart and soul #look how fuckin happy she was when he said he loved her i mean cmon #best friends to lovers arc ever #otp: that's all i need to know

[httpiastri]

dear everyone,

a while ago, i hit 1.5k followers on this blog.... i didn't want to get too sappy but i really wanted to write something, so:

the fact that over one and a half thousand individuals follow me is truly insane and too much for my little brain to grasp. i want you to know that i'm so extremely thankful for each and every single one of you and this makes me so so so happy. this is way more than i ever had expected when creating this blog.

i made this account back in june purely for my own enjoyment; i created it mainly because i was disappointed in myself for having stopped writing, since writing has been such a big part of my life since forever. ever since i stopped writing about kpop, i had barely written anything at all... i made this account just for fun with no pressure and no expectations, and before i knew it, this blog turned into something so special for me. the blog, all of the people i've met through it and all of the moments we've shared, all mean the world to me.

honestly, i'm not sure what i would do right now if i didn't have this blog and this community. these last few months have been pretty rough for me, but i've always been able to come back on here and gain a smile or some laughter. you've all helped me so much, even if unintentionally – every single interaction helps me push forward. i'm eternally grateful for every single like, comment, reblog and ask i've received on here, and your kind words really do mean the world to me. i don't know where i would be without you.

i hit 1k a while ago but didn't celebrate it properly, so i decided to make an 1k/1.5k-celly that i will be releasing soon (when i have more time to actually write)(hopefully at the start of december). please stay tuned!

and once again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you all so so so much. you truly are the best. 🧡🧡

#i never got near this much support on my old blogs (or wattpad accounts for that matter) #my most liked fic on my kpop blog had a little over 300 likes #and now my most liked fic here has over 3k notes #its all so insane to me #i'm so incredibly thankful for this community #i truly do not know how i would've stayed sane if i didnt have you all and this all #the support and sweet words i've been receiving is so so kind and i'm so so thankful #i read through every reblog & comment & ask i get and they make always me feel so warm #i get so giggly and kick my feet even at someone writing like “this was alright” in the tags of a reblog #i have a photo album saved for my fave tags & comments for when i feel down :((( gives me so much happiness #i love every person who's ever even shot a glance at my blog #hope everyone has a wonderful day 🤍🤍 #thank you again!!!! from the bottom of my heart

[verflares]

this all being said about the light dragon and how it is definitely the biggest highlight of totk (for me at least), i Do think a lot of the reaction to it Is dependent on botw and zelda's characterisation from that game... a lot of which is kind of lacking in totk because of her more passive role (e.g. you are told about her + see her actions after they have already happened)

like. if you didn't already really like zelda and were sold on her relationship with link (and not even just from a shipping zelink perspective, like. just UNDERSTANDING they have a strong bond from everything they've gone through together) then i'm not sure if any of that stuff in totk would've hit as hard as it did. the game does very little to build on what we already know about them, which i think is both a letdown to new players (which. i am not sure why they are playing the sequel before botw, but that is how totk acts most of the time lmao) and returning ones, and as time goes on it's become harder for me to blame people for not caring for it as much.

what a truly odd game

#which also makes it bizarre that totk treats itself like its Not a sequel. even though it is at the same time #ugh the names are escaping me but i am pretty sure this is a thing thats happened in other Sequel games too #just acting like the first one never happened or only when its convenient. stuff like that #i would loveeee to know how bad covid hit totks plot development or whatever. if anything. else they may have been planning #theyve gone on record saying that apparently the plan was for zelda to Always have turned into a dragon #and assumedly the beginning/ending parallel as well (eg hands and link catching her) #but i have to assume or at least HOPE that the buildup may have been stronger. idk man its so strange truly #ANYWAY SORRY FOR RAMBLING but i do find this discussion intriguing. and i LIKED totk even despite my criticisms #its genuinely some of the most fun ive had in a video game ever and creating content for it and talking about it has made me very happy #this being said. there are some choices that were made and i do not and likely will not ever understand them #because they said nah we're done now. bye <3 #like oh okay. thank you aonuma. can i at least have wind waker on switch now please #personal.txt

[swordheld]

how did u choose your username?

oh, this is a fun one!! i think i considered being swordtold at first, for that very ancient myth vibe of the sword being this narrative tool for adventure and structure and physical time, the parable being passed down through the centuries until it meddles into modern day rhetoric and ideology – a kind of fantastical tool, a spark of magic, of possibility.

i like the arc of the story of a place being physical / having it be held by time and hand alike, wearing with the years and having it become something different to each holder, each reader, each experience fantastical and individual.

having that kind of physicality to it; swordheld is the action of taking up and holding the sword yourself, choosing your own narrative, leading your own story. self-identity has always been something i struggle with (a novel concept i know, i know), so it felt right for this blog, since most of my older blogs before this one have been just me silently reblogging and never really posting anything myself, and i wanted this to be the change to that.

i've always had trouble wranging my social anxiety, esp. on the internet, and previously thought that keeping my words to myself helped keep the timeline cleaner, in a way, no messy thoughts for others to sort through, especially ones i believed no one would want to read anyway? but it never felt right, keeping myself apart from it all, esp. not in the way i so avidly enjoyed reading others' posts and additions, keeping their words close to my heart.

i wanted it to reflect that this was a space i was holding for myself? and i'm a little slow on the uptake sometimes, but this - this i think i got right. i love being here, on this blog, and the joy that it brings me. everyone else enjoying it too has been a wild ride that i never expected, and still surprises me, one that brings a little extra thrill to my heart whenever i think about it.

i had other urls that i liked, but i didn't want this blog to be tied directly to any of my fandom/story interests, since i wanted it to really just be a sort of archive of artistic inspiration and resource, like a little library or museum. i use them now as lil sideblogs of more niche interests now, which is rather lovely.

it hasn't always felt like it fit perfectly, the way that i'd like, but for some reason i can't think of really wanting to change it anytime soon. it feels mythic yet modern in a way that feels like puzzle pieces finally slotting into their place, something my own and inspirational to me, like a lantern i'm holding to make my way by. my own kind of light, if that makes sense – a star i know by name.

#q&a. #birdsong. #all of this is truly just a way to say: it's your blog! it's your party! do what you like if it makes you happy!! (and doesn't hurt anyone! #live your dreams!!!!!! do your own thing truly it is worth it. which feels silly and cheesy inspirational talk vibes but u kno. it's right #thank u for ur question tho !!! it's been so long that i don't really remember exactly what the beginning of it all was? #it wasn't always my url for this blog esp. in the beginning but i've forgotten what that was ghjk so sorry dear anon ! #like little flashes of a story in my memory i have to make out / like steam or fog on a window pane. blurry and unclear? #but now it feels more intentional / almost like watercolor! something that mixes itself into a new thing; bright and bursting w/ it all. #i hope this answers ur question nicely all the same tho <3 #i always on habit write out lantern as lanturn so this is an unintentional shout out to one of my fav pokemon love u lanturn !! #some of these things i truly do just write out bc i know it'll make me laugh later if i ever come back to it. lil joys for ur future self ! #and that IS a reference to the dickinson poem ' i am out with lanterns looking for myself ' it is in my brain always ! ! thank u ! !

[bloodcoveredgf]

i love being in love i love being in love specifically with my boyfriend and living with him now... life is so beautiful its all about loving so much and if lucky being so loved in return (TO ME !)

#genuinely life has been crazy and so hard and this move and trying to build a life and figure shit out has been Insane but having him with #me makes it all so worth it and so much easier and so beautiful and just like. its so Good... being with him is so good and im so so lucky #i love him so much hes truly truly my everything and the person i wanna be with for the rest of my life and thats so beautiful and somethin #i didnt know id ever have or could have especially with how much he wants that with me too and is just as in love with me... wah.. im just #happy and proud and excited to have him and to be sharing our lives together and to be able to reach milestones and plan them and plan our #future for real... we are taking so many steps together and i love it even on the hard days i know hes there and we're gonna be okay

[spaceratprodigy]

🎉✨💙💖 Maril and Mina 💖💙✨🎉

HAPPY BIRTHDAY @fairymistrose !! ily ily ily 💕

Commission Info | Ko-Fi | My Links

#happy birthday to one of my dearest and bestest friends ever!! #gosh tasha the past how many years now you have truly been one of the greatest lights of my life #I don't think I can ever put into words just how grateful I am to have met you #nor can I thank you enough for the kindness and care you show me constantly #you are so wonderful and special and your friendship has been so deeply impactful #never forget how loved and cherished you are #lemme not get too mushy gushy haha not like I'm not telling you constantly what I feel in my heart for you and everything you do #I love ya. I hope you're able to have a really special day #I'm so honored I get to celebrate another year with ya #and with our favorite cotton candy girlies no less!! >:3 #💖💙✨🎉💖💙✨🎉 #my art #maril highwind #friend oc #kingdom hearts

[doll-elvis]

“I know that Elvis put his heart into helping others. He hated to see anyone suffer. It was one of the reasons I loved him. Even if it was sometimes ridiculous, when you looked into his eyes as he preached or healed, all you saw was a sincere desire to help. Only those close to Elvis knew that part of him”

(excerpt from Good Rockin’ tonight by Joe Esposito)

what always hits me about Elvis is just how much he cared and how pure his heart was. I don’t think anyone who was ever friends with Elvis or was loved by Elvis experienced something like it again after he passed away. he was just a once in a life time kind of person…

#it hits me randomly how special he was #I’m just glad to have been born in a timeline where his presence is still so strong #I’m so thankful Elvis ever existed 😭 #this sounds corny but I truly owe him so much #he has taught me many things and given me so much happiness #just my comfort person honestly #elvis presley #elvisaaronpresley #elvis #i love him #elvis book excerpts