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#great...another english speaking country
obstinatecondolement · 10 months
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When the train arrived I told the conductor that I was getting off at Llanfairpwllgwyngyll, but apparently he's getting off at Chester, so I have to tell whoever his relief is too. Which. You know. Is fine. Hopefully the practice of telling the first guy will help!
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simplepotatofarmer · 1 year
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'1899' has me sold if only because i love the trope of 'a bunch of people who can't speak each others languages' in any sort of media.
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When I went to the cinema this Thursday(20th of July) there were two dudes all by themselves with no girlfriends, dressed in black and in my age range. What I liked the most is that one of them was like "It's time for pink." And honestly,that's the vibe.
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Good 4 U
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Hello there!
I hope you’re all great. This story is just out of my imagination, but enjoy anyway, I guess ♥ Also Caitlin and Lia are always a thing in this word.
TW: Reader! Wälti, no other I think.
PART 2 | PART 3
______________________________________________________________
Unlike your older sister Lia, you are not wise and quiet. You have trouble concentrating and you aren't necessarily interested in the idea of landing somewhere. You and Lia don’t have the same character, but that never stopped you from loving each other a lot. You’d do anything for your older sister who’s only 10 months older than you. And you know she would do anything in return for you. You and her were almost like twins and even if you wasn't planned, you parents always loved you the way they love Lia.
You travel all the time, leaving one place when you're getting tired to visit another corner of the world. You are sociable and have no trouble making contacts with anyone, to find a job or to make new friends. You are lucky to be able to remember the different languages in the countries you visit. You speak German from birth, you are bilingual in English and you talk other new languages like spanish or italian.
For now, you are in London with your sister for a week. The last time you stayed in London with Lia was last year when her life was a little more complicated than now. This time, you decided to come to see her just because you missed her and wanted to be with her for her birthday. You contacted Leah to help you surprise her, and you congratulate yourself for filming Lia's reaction when you walked into her living room following Leah.
When Lia told you about a karaoke night with her friends, most of them from Arsenal, you didn't hesitate a single second before accepting. You already know Caitlin obviously and Leah, who you met when she came in Switzerland last year. You met some of the girls last time you came in London, but you don't know all of them. This is a good occasion to met them.
Despite the time set at 9pm, not everyone arrived on time but this didn't prevent the people already present from starting to have fun. You’ve already shared a song with Steph and another with Leah. And you’re choosing the song you’re going to sing with Lia when Katie finally makes her appearance in the establishment.
When the music started, Katie was greeting everyone and sat at one of the tables surrounded by a bench, reserved for the night.
She's sitting with Caitlin, Leah, Kyra and Alessia when her gaze mechanically refers to you when you start singing. And her gesture stops immediately when she looks at you, her arm halfway between her mouth and the table as she was getting ready to drink.
"You alright mate?" laughs Kyra
"Who’s the girl with Wally?" Katie asks, blinking.
"Her little sister. Why?" asks Leah, bowing her eyebrow.
But Katie doesn’t answer, completely hypnotized by you. She just can’t take her eyes off you, your face, your body and anything else that can be part of you.
"It's Wally’s sister?" ended up repeating Katie before glancing at Caitlin. "Damn, you’re shagging the wrong Wälti, Caitlin."
"You’re disgusting" Caitlin says, rolling her eyes.
Leah laughs softly next to Katie and the Irish girl seems to reminding something. She turns herself a little to look at Leah before talking.
"Wait, this is the sister you met last year?"
"Yes?" answer a frowning Leah.
"And you didn't try anything with her?"
Katie’s tone let perfectly passes the disbelief she feels at this idea. But Leah rolls her eyes again.
"She’s Lia’s little sister. She would have killed me. And she’ll kill you too if you try anything with her"
Katie responds with a throat sound before finally bringing her drink to her lips. And from then on, she won’t leave you until your song is finished. Katie recognized Olivia Rodrigo’s song "Good 4 u" and she briefly wonders if it means anything to you and Lia.
When the song ends, Lia approaches the table where Katie is installed while you take the opportunity to go to the toilet. If Caitlin greets your sister with a big smile, making her sit on her lap, Leah can’t help but drop the information to Lia.
"Your sister caught Katie’s eyes" Leah announces with a big smile.
This causes a growl from Katie who hoped to try a discreet approach with you and a frown from Lia, who quickly takes off from Caitlin to lean towards Katie.
"Stay away from her Katie, I’m not kidding"
Katie raises both hands as a sign of abandonment, not without rolling her eyes.
"Looks like I’m the devil in person" Katie growls before finishing her drink.
"She was hurt once and since then has been traveling around the world. I want to see her again before Christmas 2025."
"Okay, okay, I get it" sighs gently, Katie. "I’ll get myself a drink."
After asking if anyone wanted something, Katie gets up to order herself a drink, deciding to go to the other side to have less to wait. And Lia will not be able to tell her anything, because it's finally you who approaches her first. You come to order yourself a drink too and you have no trouble recognizing the teammate of your big sister, that you watch play as soon as you can.
"You're Katie, right? I'm Y/N, Lia's sister" you smile before reaching out to greet her.
"Yes, that's me. Nice to meet ya" Katie grins, taking your hand in hers, squeezing it maybe a little to long.
Your eyes cross and you find yourself becoming aware of the beauty of the young woman who stands before you. You first notice her blue eyes and then her smile that you quickly find mesmerizing.
You are interrupted in your moment by the server who finally takes your orders. And, while Katie passes her command, you discreetly let your gaze slide on her forms. How did you not realize before how breathtaking she was?
"Lia told me you travel a lot" Katie says, turning to you to resume your conversation.
"Oh, yes… I just came back from New Zealand" you explain with a smile, before starting on an explanation of your last trip.
The minutes pass quickly as you chat with her and then you find yourself interested in her and her life. There’s something about Katie that hypnotizes you and you could honestly spend hours listening to her and laughing at what she’s telling you. You like her humor, the sound of her voice and it’s a little destabilizing for you to find yourself so impacted by someone so quickly.
"Do you want to get some fresh air?" Katie says after realizing you’ve been talking for a while.
You accept with pleasure and you follow her on the outdoor terrace of the establishment, Katie seems to know this place very well. Which is probably not surprising since Lia told you they come often.
"Here" simply makes Katie by dropping her jacket on your bare arms after seeing you shiver.
"Thank you" you answer with a sincere smile.
You move a little away from the entrance to not be in the way and you lean against a wall looking up to look at the stars. However, you gently frown when you see that they are not visible. You forgot they’re hard to see from central London.
"When are you leaving again?" asks Katie while looking at you.
You leave the sky with your eyes to carry them over her before gently shrugging your shoulders with a smile.
"I haven’t decided yet. Why?"
"I was wondering if you would give me your phone number so we could meet again, before you leave."
You bite your lip briefly while observing her. You are not sure if it's a good idea, you will probably leave soon and you know that it would probably not lead to much. But you’d be lying if you said the Irish girl didn’t tease your curiosity.
"Okay" you end up answering before you pick up her phone and put your number on it.
A big smile is born on Katie’s face and you don’t know her enough yet to realize that it’s a frank smile and not the sufficient smile she likes to have to provoke her opponents. Her phone in her pocket, Katie settles next to you, leaning against the wall like you.
"Do you like to look at the stars?" asked Katie.
"It’s probably one of the things I prefer to do" you admit without hesitation. "But it’s difficult from here"
"I know a place where they can be seen. You want to go see?"
********
"I just ran into Katie running away with a pretty blonde" laughs Victoria who just arrived while sitting at Lia’s table.
"I’m going to kill her" the Swiss woman announces, noting that you have also disappeared.
Kyra’s sigh sound out at the same time as Leah’s facepalm. Caitlin masks her amused smile behind Lia’s head, but she is nevertheless surprised by Alessia who smiles back at her.
********
You suspect a little the annoyance that Lia must feel and you feel in spite of yourself a slight guilt at the idea of not enjoying her birthday party with her. But you take a look at Katie after you get out of her car and you quickly realize that she’s genuinely happy to show you this place.
"What’s your favorite constellation?" Katie asks you when you’re both sitting in the grass.
"Aquila" you answer by pointing to the place in the sky where it is. "And you?"
"I didn’t have one until now, but it could become my favorite" Katie replies with a smirk.
You laugh slowly and you turn your head in her direction, to see that Katie rolled to the side and that she’s looking at you. You feel yourself blushed and you’re pretty glad it’s dark and Katie can’t see it. But you don’t let her out of your sight and you decide to play her game.
"What is your astrological sign?" you ask.
"Virgo"
"Well maybe my favorite constellation is going to be Virgo then"
Katie laughs softlyand, taking a sudden aspiration, you gently take her hand in yours. Katie lets you and you find that her skin is pleasantly warm and soft against yours. You shift your attention to the sky above you, feeling Katie’s gaze stay on you. But it doesn’t bother you, it’s not the kind of heavy look that makes you uncomfortable. You feel good and safe with her, despite what Lia seems to think.
It’s almost two o'clock in the morning when Katie takes you home to your sister, whose keys you have so you can get in and out whenever you want.
"I hope I’m not interrupting a private celebration" you grin maliciously at Katie, who insisted on accompanying you to the front door.
"If there is going to be a celebration tonight it will probably be to celebrate my death" laughs Katie before explaining, when you turn an interrogative look in her direction "I was not supposed to approach you tonight. Lia has warned me"
"Why did you do it then?" you ask curiously while searching through your purse while looking at it.
"Technically, it was you who approached me" Katie replies with a satisfied smile. "But I’m very happy about it."
You smile back at her and you probably look at each other for a few seconds too long, before you come out of your trance and regain your self-confidence.
"I’ll defend your cause, if you want" you joke softly.
"See me again and it will have been well worth it."
You smile again and bite your lip briefly. You really want to kiss her, but maybe it’s too early for that. You step forward and put a kiss on her cheek instead before backing away again and opening the door.
"Go home safely"
"I will" answers Katie with a smile. "Good night"
"Sweet dreams"
The house is empty when you enter and you assume that either Lia is not back yet, or she went to Caitlin’s. You go undress and remove your makeup and it's when you are writing to your sister to inform her that you came home when you receive a message from an unknown number.
From Unknow I came home safely. Sleep tight beautiful x
From You Sleep well too. We talk soon x
********
Lia looked at you with skepticism when you told her that nothing happened with Katie, unless looking at the stars and learning to know her. Since her breakup, Katie had a lot of fling and Lia obviously didn't want you to fall for the Irish girl before being ignored by her.
Katie and you wrote to each others a lot during the past days and you find yourself smiling every time she texted you. When she asked you on a date, you accepted with a second thought.
Katie take you to an Irish restaurant, she looked almost outraged to learn that you have never been to Ireland during your many travels. You had a great evening and when she brought you back you vaguely hoped for a kiss but Katie just gently kissed your cheek before smiling with affection. She then waited until you go inside to leave. Then you started texting each other almost all the day, every day.
From Katie ✨ u going to the game today?
From You I am :) why?
From Katie ✨ Would you let me take you for a brunch before ?
From You I would love to
From Katie ✨ Great. I'm taking you at 10 xx
You almost turned the cupboard in which you installed your clothes in your sister’s guest room to find a proper outfit. You ended up opting for a simple outfit, comfortable but nevertheless different from what you can wear every day. Once ready, you go to the kitchen, in which you find only Catlin in the company of her cup of coffee and a toast with…
"Vegemite?" you ask with a smirk
"Lia always has a jar for me in her cupboards" replies the Australian with amusement.
"How romantic" you laugh softly
You take a glass of water, realizing rather quickly that Caitlin observes you over the cup of coffee that she holds with two hands. Since she and Lia got together, the Australian has taken on the role of your big sister too. You obviously can’t compare the connection you have with her with the one you have with Lia, but you appreciate her enormously.
"Are you going out?"
"Yes" you just answer
"With Katie?"
You don't have time to respond with the positive or negative that Lia’s voice is heard behind you. Obviously she must appear when the name of the Irish is pronounced.
"What, Katie?" Lia asks, bowing her eyebrow.
"I'm going to a brunch with her" you explain softly with a sigh. "Look, don’t make that face, I know you don’t want anything but to protect me, but if it makes you happy… Nothing ever happened between us, if it turns out she’s not even interested in anything but friendship with me"
You gently shrug your shoulders and carefully avoid Lia’s gaze. You don’t necessarily want your older sister to see how depressed you are about this idea. But it's Caitlin who speaks again, although she's peacefully returned to reading her diary.
"Or she takes the time to do things right with you because you mean something to her" she points out without looking at you.
You frown thoughtfully at her, but Caitlin doesn’t add anything. Lia gets closer to you though, gently laying her hand on yours.
"What would make me happy is that you are too. I just want you to be happy and make sure no one can hurt you any more."
"I’ll be fine, Lia, I promise" you assure her with a little smile. "I learned from my mistakes"
Lia pout a little and when your phone vibrates in your pocket when Katie writes to you that she has arrived and that she waits for you, you take your big sister in your arms.
"I love you" you say before you kiss her cheek.
"I love you too. See you at the game?"
With a smile you nod before leaving the house. Your smile widens when you see Katie waiting for you, leaning against the front of her car.
"You look stunning" Katie smiles looking at your outfit.
"You’re not bad yourself"
Katie is dressed in her training kit, ready for the game and you find it strangely sexy. Unlike other times you have seen her, you don't hesitate to greet her with a hug and then let her take you by the hand to train you to the passenger door of the car.
The establishment that Katie has chosen is between Lia’s house and the stadium, the Irish girl explaining to you that it's a place that she loves and that has the advantage of not being too well known by the general public. It seems to have its habits and even if you don't necessarily appreciate the big smile with which the waitress welcomes Katie, you are quickly satisfied by the hand that she puts in your back to guide you to her usual table.
As always, the discussion is pleasant. You have to admit you did some research on Katie, but you feel like the Katie that people can see on the football field is different from the one you see every day. The Katie you know is sweet, attentive, considerate and charming. You have the impression that she really listens to you and that she seems particularly interested in what you tell her, no matter what it is.
And the butterflies that you have in the hollow of your belly when her fingers touch your hand while taking the salt are rather very pleasant. However, you regret not knowing if things are really shared or if Katie is only interested in friendship with you.
"Can I ask you a question?" asks Katie, her blue eyes watching you attentively over her cup of tea.
"Of course" you answer with a little smile.
"When she asked me not to come near you, Lia mentioned a romantic relationship that ended badly. I’m not asking you to tell me everything, but if you have any residual trauma or like that…"
Of course Lia mentioned your old relationship with Katie. On the other hand, you can’t blame her, after learning about the various deceptions of your ex-girlfriend, it was so painful that you never set foot in Switzerland again and you never saw your family again for a year. It apparently left your sister with trauma as well.
"As long as you don’t lie to me or hide things from me, it should be okay" you mumble and shrug.
Katie looks funny and you briefly get lost in your thoughts until the Irish woman gently takes your hand in hers. When you look up at her, she smiles softly at you, her eyes immensely sweet.
"No matter what happens, I will never. I promise"
You smile softly at her, losing yourself in her eyes. Katie changes the subject and when it’s time to leave for the stadium, you have the impression that the time has passed much too quickly.
"Do you mind if someone sees you get out of my car? There are often fans waiting for us in the parking lot, they cannot access it but they wait behind the gates. I can drop you off if you want" Katie asks when you’re about to arrive.
"I don’t care" you assure her by tapping on her arm.
You didn’t expect her to grab your hand with hers to interlace your fingers, but this gesture is rather pleasant.
Katie was right, you barely got out of the car when you heard some people calling her name. The young woman having advised you not to pay attention to it, you follow her inside the corridors in the colors of Arsenal without turning once your glance towards the fans.
"Shall I leave you there?" asks Katie once right outside the door that’s supposed to take you to the VIP corner, where Lia booked you a seat.
You nod with a slight smile. You know the way now.
"Thanks for the invitation. I had a great time"
"So do I" Katie says, smiling as well. "You still don’t know when you’re leaving, right?"
"Maybe soon. I don’t know yet"
You gently shrug your shoulders, but you don’t miss the disappointment that briefly passes over Katie’s face after her smile drop.
"Oh… okay. Well, I’ll see you soon, I guess?"
"Yeah" you smile softly.
Katie gives you a little smile, but it’s only when she turns her heels in the direction of the changing rooms that you walk forward two steps and you take the floor again.
"Katie?"
"Yes?"
The Irish girl turns and looks at you with surprise. She apparently did not expect you to hold her back.
"You want to know what it depends on?"
"Yes" she says again, looking at you carefully.
You made other steps to catch up to her and to be at her height but you mechanically bite your lip, a little anxious about your courage and its repercussions. But now is not the time to back down. Katie seems to have quickly noticed your nervousness since she is also moving in your direction of a step, offering you a reassuring smile.
"You"
"Me?"
"Yes, I… I like you, I mean not necessarily only physically. And I really like the moments we spend together, but I don’t know if it’s mutual or if I’m making ideas. And I’m a little afraid that after talking to you about it now it changes or complicates things, but-"
Katie ends up interrupting you, putting her finger on your lips to silence you. You don’t know if it’s a good thing or not and you freeze instantly.
"I like you too, I thought it was obvious. I’m sorry if I let you think otherwise. My love life may not have been the most stable in a few months, but with you it’s different."
You don’t have time to answer anything that Leah Williamson appears around the corner to call Katie. Training will begin soon.
"I have to go. I’ll see you later?"
You nod with a smile. Katie looks at you for a few more seconds smiling before heading to where Leah disappeared a few seconds ago.
"Katie?" You call her again though. "You forgot something"
Gently frowning, Katie turns in your direction, no doubt to see you so close to her, always smiling. She has no time to question you, since you come forward until you can put your lips on hers. It’s just a light kiss, but the sensations are amazing.
When you open your eyes again, Katie’s are dipping into yours and you have to take it on yourself so you don’t pass out. If you listened to yourself, you would do it again, but you don’t want to cross the line. That said, given her smile, she doesn’t seem to be against that kiss.
"Now you can go" you smile maliciously.
But Katie shakes her head with her big smile still displayed on her face. Taking advantage of your proximity, Katie gently puts her hand on your neck before drawing your face once again against hers. This kiss is longer than the first and your hands naturally find place on Katie’s body.
When Katie gently caresses your lower lip with her tongue, asking for access to yours, you do not hesitate a single second before leaving it to her. Obviously, you forget a little where you are and that everyone could surprise you. It is finally a door noise far away from you that brings you back to reality, a few minutes later.
"I really have to go" whispers Katie, her lips caressing yours when she speaks.
And it makes you half lose your mind. So you can’t resist the urge to kiss her again and it takes all your strength to tear you away from her. And let her go.
"Come on, go make the rest of the world enjoy your talent" you smile softly
Katie laughs but steals one last kiss before leaving. It’s in a second state that you join your seat, but when Katie appears on the field alongside the other players, you can’t help but smile again. Katie quickly spots you in the stands and sends you a wink to which you respond with a smile.
In the end, it’s not as safe as this that you’ll leave London.
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charlesswife · 1 year
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Una Noche En Mónaco i
Vaya noche la de anoche. (What a night last night)
unem master list
pairing: charles leclerc x latina! reader
summary: after a one night stand between you and charles, charles continues on with his f1 career. until two months later, you come back claiming to be pregnant with his child.
warning: bad writing, charles is a bit of an asshole at first, is going to be a series. google translate because I do not speak french. teen pregnancy (very cliche, I know. I'm sorry)
a/n: this is based on the idea i posted yesterday, which you all seem to like a lot. i want to clarify that english isn't my first language so please be kind if you see any error, i am trying my best. Also I am very new to formula one, i am binge watching drive to survive and the races. also i hope the timeline is correct lmao. ALSO i am not very great at writing smut so don't expect to see smut until i get better at writing it. enjoy!
word count: 1,771
Just to clarify: If I'm not wrong. In 2018, Charles was 20, turning 21 in that year. Reader is going to have an age gap of two years. So reader is 18 turning 19.
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gif is not mine! i love this gif tho, he looks so good.
March 2018
Everything from last night was a blur. I remember his green eyes on me. And then his lips. And then his skin. And then a bit more. 
The music was louder than my thoughts. Monaco is a beautiful country with even more beautiful people. 
Steph grabbed my hand and dragged me to the bar. "One Jack Daniel's with coke and one Cosmopolitan, please." She told the bartender. 
"Cosmopolitan?" I asked. 
"Oh girl, it's so good. It's vodka with cranberry juice, lemon juice, syrup, and..." She stopped for a second while her eyes drifted to something behind me. "Oh god, he's cute." I was going to turn around and look until she stopped me. "Wait, don't turn yet!"
By that time, the bartender put our drinks in front of us. I thanked him. "Girl, he's looking at you."
"Is he your kind of cute or mine?" 
"I would do it sober, on a Monday." Okay. I have to turn around and see said man. "If he wants anything, he'll come to us." She dragged me to another part of the bar. 
We danced and drank, and slowly I was forgetting about the 'gorgeous' man. I checked my phone. 12:00. 
It has been two hours since we got to the bar. 
When the song ended, we headed to the bar area, I asked the bartender for another drink. "Wait here, I have to run to the bathroom," Steph yelled in my ear and then made a beeline to the bathroom. I took the scenery in. The music was louder than before and everyone was dancing to a song I don't know of. 
The bartender put the drink in front of me, and I thanked him again. I lost count of how many times I have thanked him. 
"This is your fourth drink, is it not?" I heard a male voice next to me. I turned to see the owner of the voice. 
Green eyes. Dimpled smile. His body leaned to mine. 
"You're keeping tabs on me?" I asked.
"Hard not to," he said. He turned to the bartender and said, "Fermer la onglet. apporte-elle de l'eau. Je paierai la facture." (Close the tab, and bring her some water. I will pay for her bill.) The bartender nodded. The man turned to me again. 
"What did you tell him?" I'm not even going to lie. His accent was very sexy. 
"Nothing much. C'mon. Let's dance." he grabbed my hand and dragged me to the dance floor. 
He pulled me close to his body. Very close. His green eyes and hands were all over me. And I let him.
He leaned closer to my ear and said, "So are you going to tell me your name or will I only know as the beautiful foreign girl?" 
"You think I'm beautiful?" I asked laughing a bit. 
"Everybody in this room thinks you are beautiful," he smiled, "So?" 
"y/n," I told him. He repeated my name again, trying to see how my name feels on his lips. "And you?" I asked him. 
"Charles" I repeated his name and his smile got wider. Deepening his dimples. "Leclerc" 
Somewhere in the room, a phone rang. I was entangled with Charles that I just let it ring. His face is so calm, without worries. 
"I can feel you staring at me, mon cherie," he murmured. "do you always stare at people when you wake up?"
"Not always," I said. "you're the only exception." He smiled at my comment and opened his eyes. 
"Hello" 
"Hi," I whispered. 
"Was that your phone or mine?" He asked. 
"I don't know. If it's important, they'll ring again." As soon as the words left my mouth. The phone rang again. I let out a little whine that made Charles laugh. 
"That's your phone, that's not my ringtone." I got out of bed and looked for the phone. 
"I can feel you staring at me, mon cherie" I mocked him. 
"A sight like you should be stared at all the time." I smiled at his comment. I found my phone in between the pile of clothes that was left on the floor. Steph <3 appeared on my screen.
I lay on the bed again with Charles and answered the phone. 
"Hey bitch, I've been calling you all morning" 
"Sorry" I answered "I just woke up" 
"Are you still with the French boy?" Steph asked with a joking tone. I can't remember most of last night. But she knows about Charles and the fact he speaks French.
"I'm Monegasque," He said a bit loud, just for her to hear. 
"He says he's Monegasque" I repeated. 
"Uhhh, native. I like it. Well, text me when you're on your way back" With that, she hangs up. I looked back at Charles. 
"So, another round?" 
At first, Steph was excited for me. She was hoping for Charles to be the next thing to occupy my mind instead of my parents.
She wasn't wrong. The Monegasque lived in my mind rent-free for the past month. Especially after I found out I was pregnant. 
Two pink lines.
Positive. 
"So? What does it say?" Steph asked. I didn't say anything. Tears started to form in my eyes. "Oh god, I need a drink" She disappeared from the bathroom to the kitchen. 
Steph made me take a pregnancy test after several different random cravings that I had. She had enough of me after I ate a burger with extra extra pickles, and then more pickles on the side. For context, I hate pickles, with my life. 
Fuck. 
"y/n... what are you gonna do?" I haven't realized that she came back into the room, a glass of wine in her hand. 
"well... what's done it's done. it's my responsibility to take care so it." I answered. 
"Yeah! But so it's his! He has to be responsible too!" she yelled. 
I let the tears run down my face. "And how?! I don't have his number! It's not like I could just send him a text saying 'Hey! remember when we fucked a month ago? well, I'm pregnant now, congrats! be responsible and take care of it" 
Steph stayed quiet for a moment, just staring at me. After a while, she said, "Do you think he is on Instagram? I mean, think about it, almost everyone is on Instagram." she waved her wine at me. 
"And if he's not?" my voice broke for a moment. This is all too much for me. I am overwhelmed and drowning in my own feelings. 
"We can only hope so." She put her wine on top of the dresser and reached for her back pocket for her phone. "What was his name again?" 
"Charles," I said. 
"Love, I'm going to need more than that"
"Umm... His last name was a hard one. It was Lec... Lec-something"
For a moment, she looked at me and then back at her phone. "Leclerc?" She asked, doubt very clear in her voice.
"Yes! Leclerc. Why? Did you find him? You should get a job in the FBI" I commented while fidgeting with my hands. I was very nervous. 
"Is it him?" She turned her phone towards me. The first thing I see was a black and white picture of Charles sitting on top of a counter with an Alfa Romeo jacket. The date was March 4, 2018. Just a few days before we met. 
"Yes," I confirmed, "Wow, you are better than a PI" She slide her finger up a little and I looked at the username. Charles_leclerc with a verified check. "He's verified? Why is he verified?" I felt my heart going eighty miles per hour. 
"You fucked and got pregnant by a Formula One driver," Steph said, in a monotone voice. 
Oh fuck. 
"What do I do now?" I asked her as I made my way to my bed to sit down. 
"Well, you know who he is now. You just gotta find a way to find him and tell him." She said as she sat down and wrapped her arms around me. 
Yeah. Right. Like that's going to be easy. 
May 2018 
"When will the phase of puking stops when pregnant?" I asked Steph as I rubbed my small bump. 
"You're asking the wrong person. I am not Google" She replied. 
"You would be more awesome if you were Google" I joked as I sat at the dinner table.
The aroma of pho and fried dumplings is drugging me right now. Steph is a great chef. So am I, but I hate washing dishes. 
I am glad I have Steph to take care of me. Steph has been my best friend for the longest, she's a year older than me, but she treats me and takes care of me as if I'm her daughter. She was there for me when my parents died. She dropped everything and came with me across the world. And now she's taking care of me while being pregnant. I truly don't know what I would do without her. 
Steph served me chicken pho and eight delicious fried pork dumplings. I waited for her to sit down. 
She glanced at me for a second and then smiled. "You look like a child, waiting for permission to eat." 
I laughed. "Well, I'm sorry I waited for you," I said as I grabbed the spoon and put some of the broth in it, and then took it to my mouth. It is so savory. "This is so good" I grabbed the chopsticks and grabbed a dumpling. I blow a bit into it so I don't burn myself. I took a big bite. "Oh my gosh, this is the best dumpling." 
"You know what's better than a fried dumpling?" she asked while she wiggled her eyebrows. 
"A soup dumpling!" I said. As soon as the words left my mouth, I heard a ting! coming from my phone. I thought my phone was in silence. We both laughed a bit at the timing and sound of the phone. 
I turned my phone, immediately illuminating from the raise to wake mode. My smile dropped. 
+377 123 456 7890 
Hey, this is Charles. I'm in Monaco for a few weeks, mon cherie. Do you want to meet? 😉
I slammed my phone back to the table and looked at Steph. "What?" she asked. I looked back at my phone, making sure it wasn't a hallucination in my head. The text message was still there. 
With shaken hands, I hand her my phone while I eat the other portion of the dumpling. She looked at the text, then at me. "Oh fuck..."
Oh fuck indeed. 
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Ahhhhhh!!!!! This is the first chapter of many more to come! Please let me know what you think of it. I would very much appreciate any type of comment, whether it is your opinion or just anything! It would def motive me more to keep going.
@mac-daddy-210 @infinite-wanders @rbrsavage @itsyogurlkel @bbygrlllllll @nerdreader @imnotcryingyouare1 @killerangel88 @obx-mylove-things-blog @triorion @daniellarogers @insssanemindd @bosinclairsgff
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sourbinnie · 10 months
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Can I request a fic Where Hyunjin comes back home to you from the Versace event thingy and he’s just really emotional because he thinks he didn’t do well w his English and outfit n stuff but then you comfort him and promise him that he did great and that you’re proud of him and it’s all cute and fluffy🥹
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title -> pieces genre -> hurt/comfort pair -> hyunjin x gn!reader a/n: hope this is what you wanted! thank you sm for the request<3
i knew his flight was delayed and that he wasn't getting here as early as we expected to. i got home from work and decided to make it as comfortable as it was just for him, just so he wouldn't have to worry about anything at all. i was so proud of my boyfriend for making it this big and having a chance to fly out and enjoy a fashion show. i knew his passion for clothes and creating them, it was really exciting that he got this opportunity. it was good publicity not only for the band, but for the fact that the person wearing these clothes was an incredible human being that deserved all the love & praise he was getting. they deserved to know that hwang hyunjin was a magnificent person, just as charming as when i first met him.
even if it was late and i had work in the morning, i decided to stay up and wait for him. i just didn't wanna welcome him home with my sleeping figure and the fact that we were probably not gonna see each other tomorrow morning, just made me want to stay up more. 
the hours passed and it felt like an eternity but i remained strong as yawn after yawn escaped from me. that's when i heard the door to our apartment unlock and i turned off the tv. i got up and smiled as i saw him, he was wearing another outfit (clearly versace again) and he looked as breathtaking as one could be. it took me by surprise when i suddenly felt his arms wrap around me and give me the sweetest of hugs but i responded back fast as i hugged him. my hand going to his hair to rub him and the other one on his cheek to make him look at me.
i knew that expression way too well. he was feeling insecure, about what? i would have to ask. for now we stayed there hugging and looking at each other, mumbling "i love you" and not stopping. that's when i felt a tear drop fall from him and i decided to take him to the couch to sit us down and actually conversate about what was going.
"jinnie, talk to me when you're ready, okay?" i said and he nodded quickly as more tears were escaping his eyes. he grabbed my hands to trace patterns and distract himself but the sadness was clearly overwhelming. i've seen him distraught before, it was nothing new but it concerned me either way. what if he felt this way when he was at the event? in a foreign country? and i could not be there for him. 
it made a feeling in my chest that stung but i held on as i wiped away his tears. i knew he could get emotional and he didn't mind showing his feelings at all but sometimes he wouldn't say what was happening and i was worried it would be one of those days until he finally spoke up.
"too much." he said as he choked back on his sobs and i looked at him again. "it was too much. i don't know how i got through it without making a scene." 
"what do you mean baby?" i asked as i handed him a tissue to wipe the new tears that wouldn't stop. "you didn't feel comfortable in the event?".
"not at all." he said with a broken laugh as his eyes met mine again, reddish and with a deep kind of sadness buried in them. i was starting to realize what was going on, i knew my babe was an introvert, i knew how hard for him was to interact, to be out there, especially in those kinds of shows where you were so exposed. "i felt ridiculous, like i can't even speak english properly and even if they insisted for me to talk in korean, i wanted to prove myself and i failed."
hyunjin wasn't fluent in english, i knew that but he tried his damn hardest and this broke my heart. there was no one that put as much effort and love for the language than him and i wish he would see that but i would let him talk before i ramble too much.
"also the outfit, everyone had the fanciest stuff and i was just standing there. feeling so left out and stupid. god, why did they invite me if i was gonna be humiliated like this?" he exclaimed as i tried to put the pieces together. i didn't notice anyone being extra luxurious on the pictures that i've seen. just lots of people wearing the versace outfits they were offered, maybe he felt like it was too little but i think it was perfect. "i just feel like i'm never enough, i can never be myself and be enough for a place. it was so hard to interact with people (y/n), i don't know what i do wrong."
"nothing." i said clear as water and he looked at me confused. "you might feel like you're failing with your english, with the outfit or the scenery but you really aren't doing anything wrong jinnie".
"i just wished you were there with me." as much as i would love to agree with him, we couldn't be seen due to his contract. but yeah to be by his side and take care of him would be truly a blessing and if it helps him that's what matters.
"babe i know but for now you're probably gonna have to attend more of these. i think you looked beautiful, you always do and it's hard to not look at you when you walk in the room." i said as he blushed and i just smiled 'cause his shyness was just so adorable of him. "i truly mean that, the outfit wasn't extravagant but it fit you and you're not that. you create such a comfortable atmosphere and you have so much love to give that's hard not to fall for you".
"you're just saying that because you have to." he said as he looked down and intertwined his fingers with mine, comfortable touches from his hand to mine as i made him look at me again.
"i'm saying it because it's true." i said firmly and with an honest look in my eyes. "also your english might not be perfect but you can communicate well and people understand what you say baby. you have a really sweet way with words and everyone was mesmerized by it." 
"do i?" he said and i could see in his eyes he was starting to believe me.
"you do! it's really beautiful how you talk." i said smiling as i thought about the many times he studied english and asked felix or chan for advice. "overall and for real, i am proud of you. proud of how far you've come and how much you're gonna show to the world. proud of the effort you put it in for a language that's not your own. proud of the representation you're giving. i am so happy that you get to do these things so people can see you and see the man i fell in love with."
he was again teary eyed but i was hoping it was happy ones instead of cruel & sad ones. i could feel another hug coming in as i held him. he whispered "thank you" so many times that his voice got hoarse from all the crying and the repeating. i just held him in my arms and kissed his forehead. 
"you're the best significant other i could ask for." he said and i just smiled.
"that's you jinnie." i responded as i gave him a little peck. "let's go to bed yeah? it's been a long day for you."
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jaylienpotter · 4 months
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15 questions, 15 people
Thx for the tag @marauders-everything2
Starting a new post, it was too long. Slightly modified some questions.
1. Are you named after anyone?
Nope.
2. When was the last time you cried?
Don't remember, probably yesterday.
3. Do you want to have kids?
No thanks :)
4. What sports do/have you played?
My parents tried putting me in a bunch of shit when I was younger so I've done: swimming (for some years, still not great at it lol), surfing (quit after like 2 months), kizomba dance (hated it), another type of dance, contemporary dance (I liked it but the place closed), and we went skiing several times (which I love). If horseriding counts, I did that for a year. Currently not doing any.
5. Do you use sarcasm?
Yeah, sometimes. But I'm also quite direct and straightforward. Only "straight" I am.
6. What's the first thing you notice about someone?
Their fashion style. I love going up to strangers to compliment their outfits!
7. What's your eye colour?
Dark brown.
8. Movies with sad or happy endings?
I love movies with uncertain, ambiguous endings, in which the meaning is up for debate (like Inception).
9. What talents do you have?
Fast at absorbing information (sometimes), hypercreativity, great at bullshitting in academic tests/essays, good at making accents and voices, ummm... Can't remember more.
10. Where would you like to live?
New Zealand. It's pretty and one of the least problematic English-speaking countries (wanna live somewhere where English is the official language).
11. What are your hobbies?
Writing fanfiction and original stories (more like my passion), playing The Sims 4, drawing digitally (haven't in a while though), singing?
12. Do you have any pets?
My parents have 3 dogs (no breed) and koi fish. I want a cat :')
13. How tall are you?
165 cm or 5'5" for the Americans.
14. Favourite subject in school?
At college. Don't really like any of my current classes. Ig English C1.2 because we studied the Broadway play Hamilton. Although I haven't learned anything new.
15. What is your dream job?
Writer/author, would also like to do voice acting. Maybe a psychologist too, haven't decided if I'll take a second college degree.
No pressure tags: @siriuslystarbucks @starsandmoonys @whoopsiesnodaisies @star4daisy @starchaser-lily @half-cold-coffee @cazzythefrogking @starsarestories @my-beloved-fandoms @my-castles-crumbling @reggiecantswimm @artbyace @literallytoogaytofunction @rosemelodyshah @theres-an-endless-starry-sky
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veenus777 · 6 months
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◜Quackity Boyfriend Headcanons◞
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┊ ᝰ﹕SFW, gender neutral reader, English from Google Translate
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♤ This man is very proud to date you! He wouldn't miss an opportunity to say "hey see that person, because they are my partner", and I don't judge after all most people would never imagine that Quackity would find a partner.
♧ He would take you on all his trips, even if they were for work, and would always find space in his schedule for outings and romantic dates.
♤ Speaking of romance, this man is the last romantic on earth! He would buy you flowers, open the car door, pay the bill and praise you all the time, change my mind!!
♧ About paying for things, he would make a point of paying for absolutely everything for you, after all he came from a humble family and now that he has the means he likes to be able to give you everything you want, and he would never charge you for it.
♤ Do you like branded clothes and jewelry? Great you will have.
♧ Everyone knows that Alex loves to drive and that means long car trips wherever he goes and you will be the princess passenger.
♤ off stream game nights with just cozy games or board games alongside a nice bottle of wine.
♧ Random dates, ranging from escape rooms to a pottery class or just a night assembling legos.
♤ strange and funny couple photos, he would also have a whole album on his cell phone with photos of you distracted.
♧ You would be the funny couple, the type who posts weird photos imitating memes like this on your feed:
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♤ He would be your biggest fan and support you in everything, he would do everything in his power to help like if you want to study something or just start a new hobby.
♧ He is the type to show love with physical touch, he loves to hug, cuddle or just hold hands.
♤ He would show you his culture, be it Spanish words, music, food and also take you to visit Mexico.
♧ If you are also from another country, he would love to know everything about it and would make an effort to learn the language (if not English or Spanish) and would also visit.
♤ I feel like he would be a little insecure, he thinks he doesn't deserve you and that you are too much for him, so be kind to this man he is just a baby!!
♧ He would invite you to the QSMP, if you are a content creator, but even if you are not, he would place you as one of the administrators or one of the eggs.
♤ You would know the entire QSMP plot and he would ask for your opinion and ideas for the lore (if you don't participate).
♧ You're the only person he lets see him without his hat.
♤ flirting and stupid pickup lines over text messages, and if you live far away from each other you would spend 24/7 on FaceTime.
♧ Affectionate nicknames in Spanish such as Mi Corazon, Mi Amor, Mi Princesa or Mi alma.
♤ You would wear matching robes to events or on dates, he would probably have an "I Love My Girlfriend/Boyfriend" t-shirt with your picture on it that he would wear at every opportunity.
♧ You would probably be one of those people in the future who say "I'll talk to my husband, he's a lawyer".
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.˚。  💋 .˚。 💌
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kimbappykidding · 13 days
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Imagine thinking Joshua is only nice to you because he’s a good person but your friends Vernon and Seungkwan trying to convince you it’s actually because he has a crush on you
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Like most people, the first interaction you had with Seventeen was through their residential social butterfly Seungkwan. When he found out you were a similar age to him he decided you were going to be friends. When he learned you spoke English and had moved to Korea to become an idol he introduced you to Vernon without a second thought. It was a really nice move on Seungkwan's part and you quickly became friends with Vernon through the bonding of being born in another country. However, you weren't American but British, which the other members reacted very strongly to. They found your accent funny and told Vernon and Seungkwan to bring you around so they could make you say things in your accent. That's how you met Joshua.
He came downstairs one day to hear someone speaking English but in a very different way to him or Vernon. When he walked in he realised it was you and smiled hearing the English accent. He actually found the accent pretty hot but he didn't make that obvious. Instead he introduced himself to you and soon you had two friends who understood your situation. Joshua especially understood what it was like to leave your family and home far behind and he seemed to make it his mission to make you feel comfortable here. You soon learned Joshua was very caring and sweet, he never hesitated to help you and you began to be very fond of him. He’d even put a lot of effort into befriending your (now ex) boyfriend NCT's Mark, Joshua was that good a friend. You and Mark had been together for nearly three years when you broke up. You'd met as trainees and had a very sweet relationship. You were both so innocent and naive when you got together and you’d been each other's everything...for a while at least. When you both debuted things changed. Fame and popularity altered things and you'd noticed how you'd slowly been growing apart. You finally worked up the courage to break up with him and everything had been very amicable. When you broke up with Mark and told Seventeen you thought they were all extremely kind and sympathetic...but Vernon and Seungkwan had a different view. 
"Did you see Joshua's face?" Seungkwan asked when you all retired to his room. You shrugged "erm no but he told me that he was very sorry for me and that I could vent to him whenever I needed to". Vernon smirked "I bet he did". You sighed aware that Vernon and Seungkwan had a theory Joshua was into you. "Okay and what was your opinion on what happened then?" you asked. Seungkwan smiled "Joshua's eyes lit up and then he quickly realised you were upset and his concern for you took over but he was definitely pleased". "Definitely" Vernon agreed and you rolled your eyes "Joshua does not have a thing for me!". "Ow come on y/n you must notice how sweet and attentive he is to you?" Vernon asked "you only have to look around for something and he's asking what you need, or tonight when you couldn't reach your glass and without even hesitating he swoops in to save you". You blushed, getting flustered with the idea but still didn't believe it yet. "Joshua is just a really nice guy, he's literally known as the gentleman!" you cried. "Yes but he's not just nice to you because of simple politeness, with you it's different". "I'm not too sure" you shrugged and Seungkwan shook his head "why can’t you ever let yourself believe you're good enough? You're a great girl y/n, Joshua would be insanely lucky to have you" getting teary. He always got this way when he got wine drunk and you and Vernon shared a smile. 
"Thank you Seungkwan" you said taking his hand "it's not that I don't like myself it's just I struggle seeing what you guys do. I think Joshua is just nice to me because he knows what it's like to be from another country, the same way we became friends" you said to Vernon. Vernon nodded "sure that might've been it at first but I'm your friend now because of so much more than that and it's the same for Joshua. You're now fluent in Korean, have a house here and belong...Joshua is just interested in you. Accept it". You grinned at Vernon's tone "why is it so important to you guys that I do?". "Because then you and Joshua can finally become a couple like the whole group wants!" Seungkwan cried and Vernon shot him a look. "What?" you asked confused and Vernon laughed awkwardly "nothing...just the members kind of ship the two of you". "What? Does Joshua know?". Vernon nodded "they sometimes tease him but it's just a bit of fun! Like how we tell Mingyu he's gonna marry his reflection". "All of you ship us?" you asked. Seungkwan nodded "yeah because we see how you look at each other and how Joshua used to look at Mark". You laughed "Joshua and Mark were friends!". "Yeah but not friendly...more Mark was important to you so Joshua was civil to him but he never liked him, he actually had a go at him one time". "What?" you asked and Vernon nodded "yeah we were at this nightclub and Mark was there. It was when you were ill and Joshua went over and asked how you were and basically heavily hinted Mark should go home and look after you or he would. Mark left like five minutes later". You remembered that night, Mark had appeared early from his night out and you thought it was such a kind and sweet gesture...but apparently it wasn't even his idea. It had been Joshua all along. "Wow I didn't know...does Joshua do stuff like that a lot?". "All the time for you!" Seungkwan cried "you just never seem to notice". You nodded "well I'll try paying more attention now do you want to play uno or something?".
After that, what Vernon and Seungkwan told you about Joshua largely slipped your mind as you were busy with work and training. So you were really relieved when you finally had some free time and went out with Vernon, Seungkwan and their members. You were having a nice night and really enjoying being with your friends. You did notice how good Joshua looked but figured he was always handsome so you checking him out didn’t mean anything...Seungkwan and Vernon had different views but you were too tipsy to argue so just humoured them. 
You were passing through a room coming back from the toilet when you spotted a familiar face. Mark was there and he wasn’t alone, he was sat with a girl and they clearly were not friends. You backed away from the scene as if you’d been struck by lightning and felt panic begin to build in your chest. You felt like the lights and music were too powerful and you couldn’t calm down no matter how much you tried to. You weren't sure why it affected you so much. You and Mark had broken up over 3 months ago now. It had been amicable and you'd both sensed it coming for so long....so why did you feel so hurt? 
You didn't know what you were feeling all you knew was you had to get out of the room so you quickly backtracked the way you came and rushed outside. You banged into several people in your rush but barely noticed them. You finally made it outside and let the cold air wash over you. The wind was piercing but it helped you to breathe so you didn't even feel the coldness of it. You had your eyes closed trying to stop the tears but it didn't work. You jumped when a hand touched you. "Y/n what are you doing out here it's freezing!" Joshua cried quickly wrapping his jacket around you. "I'm fine..." you said but your hands wouldn't stop shaking. "What happened?" Joshua asked seeing the tears running down your cheek. You struggled to speak and only managed to say “Mark” but that was enough for Joshua. “He’s here? What has he done?  "has he said something to you? I swear if he has...". "No" you said shaking your head "he...I just don't want to be here anymore". Joshua nodded "would you like me to take you home?". You shook your head "no I can't ruin your night". "You won't be, trust me. I won't be able to enjoy myself if I know you're upset anyway. Come on let me take you home and we can talk if you want?" he asked. You nodded "okay" and Joshua led you to the exit, keeping close to you but never presuming to touch you. Once outside again you felt better and Joshua quickly got you to his car and opened the door for you. Then he walked around to his door and slid in beside you. He gave you a small smile and passed you his phone "play anything you want or we can just drive in silence. Whatever you want". You nodded and tearfully chose a random playlist.
You arrived back outside your house in what felt like no time and Joshua hesitated in the driveway. “We’re here...do you want to be alone or would you like some company?" Joshua asked. You weren’t really sure how you were feeling but you knew if you went into the empty house alone you’d just start crying. "Can you stay? How about we watch a film?" you offered and Joshua nodded "sounds great" and parked. Once inside you got changed while Joshua went to make some hot chocolates. You met in the living room and while the tv was loading Joshua looked at you. "So it's fine if you don't want to but would like to talk about what happened?" he asked and you sighed "I feel so stupid really...I saw Mark with another girl and it just hurt. I don't even know why! I'm happy we broke up and I don't want him back but I saw it and freaked out...what's wrong with me?". "Nothing!" Joshua assured you "y/n you and Mark were together for years, it's bound to scare you when you see him with someone new. It doesn't mean you're weird or still want him. It's normal". "It is?" you asked and Joshua nodded "when my first girlfriend dumped me I was a mess for months and months, still if I meet someone with her name it makes me feel vulnerable and weird for a few seconds". "That's what it was! I felt so vulnerable and alone! Like he was moving on and I wasn't...does that make me really immature and petty?". Joshua shook his head "not at all, but you know you're not vulnerable or alone right? You have all your members and friends not to mention, me, Seungkwan, Vernon and all the other members. We're all here and always will be". You blushed "thank you that means a lot, I'm glad I met you". Joshua smiled back "I'm glad I met you too y/n" and you just enjoyed the moment for a few seconds. 
As you watched Joshua you saw the way he was staring at you, the way his eyes looked at you with so much care and adoration and your heart sped up as you recognised what Vernon and Seungkwan meant. Joshua quickly caught himself though and moved away from you. He would never make a move on a girl while she's emotionally vulnerable so he did the responsible thing and turned to you with an innocent smile "so what film should we watch? You picked last time but I guess I can let you choose again". You smiled back at him and took the remote from his hands, ignoring how your heart fluttered when your hands met. 
After that it was like your whole world had been turned upside down. You couldn't stop watching Joshua out of the corner of your eye and later when he left your stomach did back flips as he hugged you and told you to call anytime if you needed him. You lingered slightly and blushed as he stared at you with those beautiful eyes. Once he'd gone everything felt different and things even looked different. You were no longer upset over Mark, you had this excited feeling in your chest because you were pretty sure you'd fallen for Joshua. The next morning you asked Seungkwan and Vernon to grab a coffee and met them around the corner from your house. Once you were seated you sighed "okay so I've got something to admit. You might've both been right this entire time" you said looking down. Vernon didn’t get what you meant but Seungkwan did. He leapt at you with a huge grin on his face "you finally see it! You see how he looks at you". Vernon grinned "Joshua?" and you nodded "how did I miss it?". "Honestly when you were with Mark you didn't see it because you were his girlfriend and only interested in him but I think now, finally, you don't have that blinding you. What happened? How did you realise?". You explained the situation and the two were soon acting like school children, squealing and grinning at you. "Y/n you have to come to Joshua's birthday barbeque next week and tell him!" Seungkwan cried and Vernon nodded "totally!". "But I thought that was for members only?" you asked. Seungkwan shrugged "so? We're doing it for Joshua and what better way to make him happy than having you there?". You blushed at how sweet that was and Seungkwan continued. "You should totally come just before we eat too! Make a grand entrance". Vernon nodded "yes make it more dramatic". "Oww and wear that red dress you wore to Vernon's birthday party! Remember the way Joshua's eyes nearly popped out?". Vernon hit his arm but you were now very okay with the idea of Joshua finding you attractive. "Okay I'll do it!" you said feeling confident. That confidence of course had completely faded by the time the event actually rolled around. "But what if it all goes wrong?" you texted into your group chat with Seungkwan and Vernon. "Not possible" Vernon replied instantly. "Yeah, he's going to be so happy to see you. Are you near?" Seungkwan asked. "I've been parked outside for five minutes". "Y/n! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE RIGHT NOW!" Seungkwan replied. So you got out and nervously made your way to the front door. Vernon was helpfully waiting there and he grinned when he saw you "come let's put your stuff inside and then take you to Joshua". You blushed "what if he doesn't actually like me?". "You're only saying that because you're nervous. it's all going to be great" Vernon told you and you chose to believe him. You found Seungkwan inside and he rushed over to hug you. "You look smoking! Joshua is going to be on the floor". You just turned even redder and Vernon laughed "come on let's get her outside" and you followed them. You could hear the other members talking now but couldn't see them as Vernon and Seungkwan blocked you from their view by walking in front of you.  "Have we got room for one more?" Seungkwan called and dramatically moved out of the way so you were revealed. "Y/n?" Joshua called and you smiled "hey, I hope it's okay I came, I brought alcohol and presents". "Of course it is but you didn't have to bring anything!" Joshua said rushing over to hug you. The other members smirked as he practically ran and threw his arms around you. "Happy Birthday!" you smiled hugging him back and Joshua was beaming. "Thank you so much for coming...would you like a drink?". Joshua led you over to the bar and the members all smiled. "We all woke him up bang on midnight, arranged a skype home and threw him this party but we didn't get a smile even close to that" Scoups said grinning "he's so smitten it's cute". "Vernon and I totally win best birthday present" Seungkwan said and the others all nodded. "Well it’s hardly fair when your present is the girl he’s crazy about" Jeonghan commented. You and Joshua turned around to find everyone staring at you and they quickly pretended they hadn’t been talking about you.   As you came to sit down the members all moved down so you could sit next to Joshua and the two of you stayed like that most of the day. You chatted to everyone of course but your attention was well and truly captured by Joshua. He looked so happy surrounded by all his friends you never realised how beautiful his smile was before. Throughout dinner you kept shooting shy glances at him and then blushing when he caught you while doing the same to you. 
After you’d eaten it was time for gifts. "Present time!" Seungkwan cried coming forwards with the stack the second the table had been cleared. You helped pass them down to Joshua and smiled as all his members got him such great gifts. You noticed Seungkwan sneakily keeping yours until the end and tried to get Vernon to stop him but of course he didn’t. So the last present was yours and Joshua recognised that straight away. “Y/n’s! You really didn’t have to get me anything”. You shook your head “of course I did it’s your birthday!”. Joshua went to argue but the members called for him to open it already and so Joshua relented. He undid the wrapping paper and began to laugh. "What is it? What are they?" Hoshi asked and Joshua grinned "y/n you didn't?". You smiled at how he riffled through the box. "Jaffa cakes, Jamie Dodgers, Space Invaders...you even baked Cherry Bakewells! You got me all the best British snacks! This is amazing". You blushed at how happy Joshua seemed "well you loved them so much that day you tried them at mine so I asked my mom to send some over for your birthday!". "Wait you shipped them over from England just for my birthday?" Joshua asked like you'd imported them from space. "It's no big deal" you shrugged but Joshua shook his head "it is. Thank you y/n I love it so much". You smiled "I'm glad you liked it" and Scoups smiled before he caught DK trying to steal some of the snacks "Dk no!". "But they're British snacks! I've never had them before" he whined. "They're Joshua's that y/n shipped across thousands of miles. Leave them for him". "I'll bring some more for you to try next time" you promised and Dk relaxed now pleased he wouldn’t be left out. 
Seeing as that was the last present, you needed something to mark the occasion."Let's take a photo" Jeonghan said and everyone nodded and began moving closer together. "Who's going to take it?” The8 asked and you stood up "why don't I? That way you can post it on social media if you want to". Joshua shook his head "no I want you in the photo" which made you blush and all the members smile again. "We can just put it on auto timer" Wonwoo said and he and Jeonghan began setting it up while everyone got into place. "Sorry I think I'll have to come closer to you" Joshua told you and you shook your head "it's fine" and relaxed as he leaned on your chair putting an arm around the back to stabilise it. "Okay everyone ready? We've got 10 seconds from when we press the button" Jeonghan called. Everyone nodded and you glanced at Joshua making him look at you. "What?" he asked and you shook your head "nothing you just look really nice" as the camera took the photo. Joshua had the biggest smile on his face.
After that you all played some drinking games and soon the hours flew by without you even realising it was almost dark. "Y/n are you staying over tonight?" Dino asked noticing the sun setting. You paused "erm maybe, what time is it?". "Too late to drive back or get a taxi" Scoups said "just stay". You were just about to nod when Hoshi smirked "I'm sure Joshua won't mind letting you bunk with him". Everyone paused in shock and Hoshi gasped “did i say that aloud?". "Yes" Jeonghan said secretly loving how pink you and Joshua had both gone. "Y/n can stay wherever she likes, with me, with Vernon, with Joshua..." Seungkwan said trying to save the situation but he just made everyone laugh at the awkwardness even you and Joshua. "I'm sure I'll figure something out" you smiled and caught Joshua watching you making him blush.
Slowly the members began to move inside and prepare their last surprise for Joshua. It was an American movie he loved and they were turning the living room into a cinema. So they told Joshua to stay put and as more and more drifted off you stayed with him for company. You smirked as you got a text "it's my mom asking if you liked the snacks" you laughed and Joshua smiled "we should send her a selfie with them". He held up a space invader and passed one to you "if you want to of course?". You nodded "sure" and moved closer for the photo. Joshua held the phone out in front of the two of you and smiled holding up your little alien-shaped snack. Joshua took the photo and then brought it up for your approval. You both looked so happy and good together that it made you pause. You’d never looked like that in any photo with Mark and it made you feel so grateful to have Joshua in your life. 
Joshua noticed your expression turn serious and paused “woah y/n are you okay?”. You nodded “yeah today’s just got me thinking and you know I don’t think I ever thanked you for being so nice to me when we first met". Joshua shook his head "ow come on it was nothing". "No you made me feel welcome and offered to help me with my Korean and moving apartments and basically everything. I always wondered what I did to deserve such kindness from you". Joshua smiled "Y/n you don’t have to do anything to deserve kindness. It's a basic human right that you are more than worthy of". You blushed and after having several drinks felt a little confident so you replied "It’s things like that which make girls go crazy for you, you know?". Joshua laughed "I’m not too sure about that" he smiled and you shrugged "the ones with any sense do". "Like you?" he asked boldly and you paused "yeah...like me. I guess that means I'm the only one with some sense". "That's more than fine by me, you're the only girl I'd want paying attention to me" Joshua replied and leaned in to kiss you. It was spontaneous and beautiful. You don’t think even Joshua had been expecting himself to do that but it made it all the more perfect.
When you separated Joshua looked worried. "It just occurred to me now I did that without asking you if it was okay with you" Joshua said softly. "Well I'm hoping you could tell from my reaction but I didn’t hate it" you replied with a huge smile on your face. Joshua laughed "that's a relief". "I like you" you said simply and Joshua smiled "I like you too...I have for ages but the time was never right but now...". "Now feels pretty perfect” you smiled and Joshua grinned "I couldn’t agree more. Best birthday ever”. You laughed "happy birthday" and kissed him again. The two of you walked up to the house hand in and hand and passed the window making all the members gasp. You let Joshua go in first so he could see the room and smiled as he was so impressed with everything. He loved it and the members quickly directed him to a seat in pride of place in the middle of the room. Joshua looked for you but you realised you’d forgotten your phone and went back outside to grab it. Joshua turned back to the room and the members all grabbed him. "Stop!" he called smiling "none of this when y/n gets here. I don’t want you to make her feel uncomfortable". "I'm sorry but we’ve been waiting for this for years, you can handle a little excitement" Jeonghan replied. 
You walked inside and the boys all stopped and then cheered. You blushed and Joshua held out a hand to you. You joined him and he pulled you into the seat with him, letting you hide your blush from the guys. "I just want to say I'm so happy you two are together" Seungwan said "you'll be a brilliant couple and we don’t even have to threaten Joshua because we can trust him...but still hurt y/n and I will kill you" Seungkwan said making you laugh. "Don’t worry I have no plans to make her anything other than happy" Joshua replied and several members groaned while the others awed. You blushed and turned to Jeonghan "should we just play the movie and kill the lights?". "Why? You got some plans with Joshua when it goes dark?" the boy asked smirking and Joshua threw a cushion at him "just play it!". Jeonghan pressed play and the room dissolved into darkness. 
Once the movie started everyone settled down and Joshua moved closer. “Hey i’m sorry about them” Joshua whispered but you shook your head smiling “it’s okay, they’re just excited”. He nodded “well as long as they didn’t make you uncomfortable”. You shook your head “no i’m very comfortable” leaning into his arm around you and Joshua chuckled “good” and moved closer. The gesture felt so natural and you felt so safe and welcome here with Joshua and all his members. Something told you it was where you were meant to be. 
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Disney Villains Only being able to Speak their First Language to Eachother
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Hey fellow Hetalians (No such thing as an ex-Hetalian, y'all know that), remember that post about all the characters only being able to speak their countries official languages for a day?? And the chaos that would've ensued?? This is inspired by that post XD
Imagine the Disney Villains getting hexed by like, Mama Odie or Merryweather or Merlin or someone, so they can all only speak and understand their first language for a month.
Yes. A whole month.
The Toon Patrol are seriously struggling because Greasy keeps talking really fast Spanish at them but the rest have no idea what he's saying. Eventually Smartass decides to lock him in a separate room until this can be figured out and you can just hear banging and vague Spanish coming out the crack.
Ernesto is trying to figure out what some of the English speakers are saying because every 11th word is kinda familiar and they speak slow (Especially the rotund, yodelling fellow) but he keeps getting distracted by this faint Spanish yelling coming from another room.
Hades and Jafar stand off to the side near a wall just watching all the mess. They cant understand each other of course but no one else can understand them either so there's really nothing else to do. Hades will occasionally point something out, like Gaston leaning his sweaty arm on Frollo's shoulder and Frollo struggling to not buckle under the weight, and they'll chuckle. (Yes, laughter. The universal language XD)
Speaking of the French speakers-- they're suffering. Frollo hates his fellow French speakers for all being such sinners, Lady Tremaine hates the others because they're idiots or they have too much attitude towards her (*Cough* mal), Maleficent looks down on them all because they're all magic-less plebs, Edgar hates them because they all have money, and Gaston keeps talking about himself and someone is going to hit him. But they all try to keep it together, keep it classy, though most of them have elected to just not talk except for Gaston.
The oddest pairing is probably Hans and Ursula. She speaks Danish, or a dialect similar to it, and he is either Norwegian or Icelandic. If he's Norwegian, they're trying to figure out what the other is saying. Its mostly Ursula flirting with him and him carefully deciphering her words... and then facepalming. ikke til å tro (Unbelievable). But she keeps making like she has something important to tell him, like how to fix this huge predicament, and he keeps falling for it XD
Hilda and Mother Gothel speak German together and basically check out of this mess- like, do they want to understand what insanity Gaston and Jafar are saying again?? Or Frollo?? Haha, No...
Scroop speaks a harsh alien dialect and Silver's just standing next to him like yeah, yeah... you know i dont understand a word you're saying? *... realises scroop cant understand him either and sighs* Ahhh... *Rubs the bridge of his nose*
Rourke approaches the Horned King, curious why he's just standing there doing nothing and gets a string of growly Welsh and promptly... leaves... Like nope. Not today. That crap sounded like an ancient curse and that is not on todays schedule, thanks.
Clayton claims to have visited half these countries (Truth) and could figure out what many of the other villains are saying if he wanted (Exaggeration) so Cruella's like okay great... go and Captain Hook's like that's marvelous! go ahead then my good fellow!. He goes up to Shan Yu and immediately fails.
Shan Yu is usually pretty quiet around the other villains, so him standing there unreadable though faintly amused by them all is... not out of the ordinary XDD
If you have more to add, please feel free! XD
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fics-n-stuff · 8 months
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Steve walked into the Munson trailer one day to find Eddie in the kitchen singing, lightly headbanging along to the accompanying instrumental that was playing in his head while he washed the dishes. This was not unusual. What was unusual was that Eddie was not singing in English.
Steve shut the trailer door slowly and quietly so as not to catch Eddie's attention, and slowly moved forward while listening to Eddie sing. He didn't want to interrupt yet.
A couple of minutes passed before Eddie turned and noticed Steve. He jumped, letting out a small yelp, which made Steve chuckle.
"Jesus, Harrington! How long have you been there?"
"A couple minutes."
"And you didn't think of saying anything?"
"I was trying to figure out what language you were singing in."
"Oh." Eddie grabbed a tea towel to wipe his hands on. "It was Danish."
"You speak Danish?" Steve asked in disbelief. Eddie nodded casually.
"Yeah, my mom was Danish." He shrugged. He dropped the towel and sauntered over to Steve, draping his arms over his shoulders before pressing a quick kiss to his lips. "Did I never tell you that?"
"No, you never told me that. You're Danish?"
"Yeah." Eddie laughed. "I know I don't really look it. You know, dark hair and dark eyes aren't really the expected viking features. Unfortunately I look more like my dad. But my hair was lighter when I was a kid."
"You speak Danish?" Steve's brain was still catching up with all this new information.
"En lille smule." Eddie grinned. "Min mor talte dansk tilt mig."¹
"I don't know what you said but that was really hot." Steve muttered. Eddie laughed. "So what was that song you were singing?"
"Me and my cousin in Denmark write letters to each other. He sent me a tape with some music he thought I'd like and one of the songs got stuck in my head."
"Will you teach me some Danish?"
"Selvfølgelig!"² Eddie's face lit up. "Nobody's ever cared that I was Danish before. A lot of people literally didn't even know that Denmark is a country."
"I think it's really cool. I wish my mom had taught me Italian, I only know the things my nonna always said, which is mostly swears and insults."
"Hey, that's useful stuff. That means you can shit talk people without them knowing what you said."
"Yeah but it would be nice to have a functioning knowledge of the language too." Steve shrugged.
"Det er ikke så fantastisk."³ Eddie said with a shake of his head, though his lips were quirked up in a smile. "There isn't really much point when nobody else understands."
"Except that being bilingual is hot." Steve smiled.
"Er det rigtigt?"⁴ Eddie exclaimed amusedly, grinning again. He leaned in to press another kiss to Steve's lips, longer and more tender. He pulled back and rested his forehead against Steve's, letting out a tiny contented sigh. "Jeg elsker dig."⁵
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I just came back from visiting family in Denmark and I had the idea of Scandinavian Eddie so here's a teensy tiny ficlet. I was gonna make him Norwegian because Norway is more known for their metal music than Denmark, but I don't speak Norwegian so I felt uncomfortable writing any Nowegian sentences. I don't really speak Danish either but I could at least kinda know what I was writing, and I kept it pretty simple so almost all of it is stuff I know anyway. 💕
Translations:
¹"A little bit." "My mum spoke Danish to me."
²"Of course!"
³"It's not that great."
⁴"Is that right?"
⁵"I love you."
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useless-catalanfacts · 2 months
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A new rule to increment discrimination
Context:
Public healthcare is one of the places where the most Catalanophobic interactions are reported. In 4 years, more than 100 Catalan speakers have reported that they have been denied healthcare or otherwise discriminated against for speaking Catalan, or were unable to access any healthcare in Catalan in a Catalan-speaking territory.
From disabled people who only speak Catalan being refused any medical attention unless they speak Spanish (which they don't know how to speak), to a man calling the ambulance but the healthcare worker who answers the phone spends the time scolding the caller for not speaking Spanish instead of calling for the urgently-needed ambulance, to many, many, many, many, many, many doctors telling patients "either you speak in Spanish or you leave", and many others given choices that link their language to shame: "would you rather speak Catalan or your son get cured?", "do you want to speak Catalan or do you want a vaccine appointment?", or being told "[derrogatory/infantilizing word for "woman"], you're making me waste time" for seeking medical attention as a Catalan-speaker.
Lack of access to healthcare is a systemic problem for Catalan people, who are often forced to use Spanish if we want medical treatment in our own country.
People should have the right to access public services (that they pay for with their own tax money) in the language of the country. Can you imagine an English speaker in England not being able to see any doctor or nurse who can attend them in English? Or in French in France, or German in Germany? It doesn't happen because speakers of the dominant language have the State on their side, but Catalan speakers have the Spanish (and French, in the case of Northern Catalonia) Government actively working against us.
And, more than anywhere else, in a moment of great vulnerability like the medical setting, it's very important that patients can speak their own language and not have to worry about translating concepts, they need to have the confidence to speak clearly on what happens to them and be focused on the issue, not on word choice or accent of this second language. Even less be worried about possibly facing discrimination for it.
The new rule:
The new Government of the Valencian Country (a coalition of the right-wing party PP and the fascist party Vox, both Spanish supremacist parties who make the hatred against Catalan/Valencian one of their main campaign points) has announced yet another way to increment that discrimination.
Until now, to decide who to hire for public jobs, there was a system of points, where each kind of certificate and qualification gave you some points. Speaking the local language (Valencian/Catalan) was already not a requisite —legally creating the situation where doctors and nurses can not know any of the language spoken in the place where they work. But, until now, speaking the local language at least gave some extra points.
Now, this new Spanish supremacist regional government has decided that knowing Valencian in the Valencian Country to work in a job with public interaction is worth less than speaking any language of an independent EU state. This means that you get more points for speaking, for example, Latvian, Swedish, Maltese, Slovak or Lithuanian, than for speaking the language of the place where you will be working and where you will be talking to people.
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My full respect for speakers of all these languages, but (as an example) a hypothetical Estonian speaker who you might never even encounter in a Valencian town should not be worth more than the very real Valencian speakers that you will surely encounter working in the Valencian Country.
This rule is another step to legally protect systemic discrimination and to make it continue in the future.
Note: Valencian and Catalan are two names for the same language. They're being used interchangeably.
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izicodes · 2 months
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Saturday 20th January 2024
Someone asked me earlier this week a question that I didn't really deeped about beforehand. Basically, I was stuck answering it and it boggled my mind ever since because it stuck to me how I didn't think about this earlier on?
"What are your career goals?"
Since I started learning programming and Web Development back in 2020, I just thought "Oh getting a proper job in Tech would be great!"... but now I got it, it's like okay what now? Do I just continue this, learn new things, and just stick to this position?
I had to answer this person straight away for specific reasons but I said "Maybe being a Senior Software Engineer would be nice 🤷🏾‍♀️" and yeah I'm sure having that title would be great for my Dad to boast to his family and mates about "Oh my daughter is a Senior Software Engineer~! 😎", which honestly I don't mind as he's happy, but what else? What do I actually want to work towards now - short and long-term?
But making short and long-term goals is very important. For some people, this helps them have a path for them to work towards. I am one of those people because that's what I did to get where I am now in my programming journey, but I didn't think THIS far as to what next after I got the job I wanted. I came up with some ideas but I might work on them a bit:
Senior Software Engineer be nice?
Whatever a CTO actually does? (long-term)
Be proficient enough in Web Development technologies to teach others properly maybe? Especially the younger generation (HELP I tried teaching my sister coding and she called me a nerd...)
Work on my own web app product thingy?? and sell?? and earn money?? (confused about how I would do that though)
Venture out to Game / App Development maybe? (long-term)
Ability to work anywhere internationally (I have other goals where I would have to visit countries so would also like to work in Tech as I complete those side-quests)
Right now I am comfortable working FOR someone / company - I'm the type that SOMEHOW I become a CEO I still would work than be a no work/meetings/travel to conferences type of CEO if that makes sense
Help other companies temporarily on Web Dev stuff (free or paid, I don't mind - just want experience, innit?)
Work in another country maybe? That doesn't speak English though cause that's cheating (to me, I like challenges and language learning is a really good one)
But maybe now I will have something to work towards, but I will soon convert this bunch of ideas to a roadmap a bit~! 🤔
Thank you for reading and hope this makes you think about your own goals in terms of career/work/profession~!
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Football and Snow
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Hi guys!
Thanks you for your reviews and your DM's, it's always a pleasure to read you :)
We are at the end of this serie for Christmas, maybe I'll do one more with Leila Ouahabi if you want to, after that I will restart my usual writing. I have some ideas for Ona and Alexia and I will start the big one with Leah :)
Please enjoy this one and have a wonderful Christmas!
TW : None, unless the cold bother you
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Being the girlfriend of a professional footballer has several advantages, but you have to admit that tonight you preferred Laia to do another sport. For example swimming, which would allow you to stay warm in a pool to watch her swim. Because tonight, you find yourself shivering at the edge of a football field.
This is the last game of the year, after that there is the famous Christmas break. You look forward to it, going back to your home country to celebrate with your loved ones. You didn’t hesitate for a second to follow Laia in Manchester when she signed with the club despite the various problems that can bring you to your professional life. But you quickly found a job, despite Laia’s allegations that she’s making enough money for both of you. But it allowed you to meet new people and make a some friends.
Some of them sometimes accompany you to watch Laia and the girls, but tonight it's too cold for that and you understand them widely. You even hesitated not to keep your promise to Laia to come and see her play all her games, you know that she wouldn't have be mad at you for a single second. But you’re a woman of your word and you can freeze your entire body for the beautiful eyes of your girlfriend.
You’re at your third hot tea when the end of the game is finally whistled. In addition to the cold, it started to snow after twenty minutes of playing time. If it brings an almost romantic touch to the decor, it's still really cold. You’re concerned that these conditions will make the risk of injury greater, but you’re happy to see that Laia still seems to be whole at the end of the game time.
Manchester City won their last game of the year and you can’t wait to go for a hot bath at home. For once, before going to greet her fans, Laia hurries to join you. The box reserved for families and friends is almost empty.
"Mi Amor, go inside get warm. I take some pictures and I’ll join you."
You just nod, thoughtfully wondering if your lips have frozen. As if she could read your mind, Laia leans over you to kiss you tenderly. Her lips are hot against yours and it makes you shiver.
"I’ll be quick, okay?"
"Okay" you just answer with a smile, lovingly stroking her cheek.
Laia smile at you before turning and running back to the crowd. You look at her for a few seconds before returning inside. The temperature difference makes you shiver again and you take the opportunity to go to the bathroom. After all, you drank three hot teas, anyone can understand the urgency.
You exchange a few words with relatives of Laia’s teammates to pass the time, especially those who speak Spanish, commenting on the match you just attended. You just took off your scarf, beanie and gloves, not fully warmed when Laia appears behind you. Her hand behind your back makes you turn mechanically in her direction and you address her a smile before putting a kiss on her cheek.
"It was a very great game" you congratulate her
"Thank you. I hope it will be less cold next time"
She smiles at you maliciously and you shrug. The english weather has been the hardest thing for you since you moved to England. Yet it’s not like it’s your first winter here. But after all these years of enjoying the Spanish heat, it’s still hard for you.
"Maybe I should find a girlfriend who plays in Spain… Could you introduce me to one of the Barca players?"
Laia snorts but takes you in her arms possessively, laying a kiss on your hair before answering you.
"Count on it mi Amor. You’re mine."
"Only yours" you confirm, answering her embrace by holding her tighter.
"Are you ready to go?"
You nod with a smile and follow Laia to greet her teammates and their loved ones around you. When you find yourself outside again, the biting cold hits you hard, making you shiver from foot to head.
"I’ll buy you a giant heating pad for Christmas" Laia laughs, putting an arm around your shoulders to hold you tight.
You willingly let her do it, sticking as much as possible to her, craving her warmness. The snow continues to fall, coloring everything around you with white.
"We’re so lucky" Laia mumble quietly.
You raise your eyes on her and you realize that she's looking at you, certainly doing the same thing for a few seconds already. On your side you were rather careful to check where you put your feet, trying not to fall. When your eyes meet you can't help but smile and respond positively.
Yes, you’re cold, but you’re lucky. The woman you love deeply loves you back, you’re together when you could be separated by thousands of miles. Laia is tender, loving, passionate and will remind you when you return to your apartment that she makes the best pancakes in the world. You couldn’t be luckier.
"I'm the luckiest."
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Sonic Character Cultural Coding
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Despite the fact that a good chunk of Sonic characters are anthropomorphized animals, a large amount of them have been given explicit or implicit coding that aligns with cultures that we see on Earth! I’ve found it hard to find a detailed list of it all online, so... I made one!
Disclaimers:
I am going to say: some of these may seem pretty obvious, but at the same time I’ve seen people miss them, so I’ll be including both the “obvious” and “obscure” coding.
If I accidentally said anything offensive, please let me know so I can correct it!
We are going to start with Sonic himself, and then do the rest in alphabetical order! Let’s go!
Sonic the Hedgehog (+bio fam) – Egyptian
We’re gonna start with Sonic the Hedgehog himself– who is very much coded as Black, specifically of Egyptian descent.
In Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog 1x50, “Robotnik’s Pyramid Scheme,” Robotnik goes back in time to try and prevent Sonic from ever existing by keeping his ancestors from meeting. Sonic goes back in time to stop him and we meet Masonic and Penelope who are Sonic’s great-great+ grandparents and live in ancient Egypt. Masonic is specifically designed to look almost exactly like Sonic.
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Later in the episode they end up inside a pyramid and meet yet another ancestor of theirs, who is an enchanted mummy hedgehog. He gives Sonic a chaos emerald to kick Robotnik’s ass. He also looks exactly like Sonic.
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And SPEAKING OF enchanted mummy hedgehogs! In the Sonic Underground episode 1x22, “Mummy Dearest,” Sonic is AGAIN explicitly given ancient egyptian ancestry, when he and his siblings find a book talking about their family history. They use the book to find directions to a magic scroll which is protected by one of their ancestors, Aman-Rapi, who is again very clearly from Ancient Egypt and looks like Sonic. 
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In this pic, they can be seen posing in front of a wall containing heiroglyphs, with a mummy behind them, Amon-Rapi is literally dressed as a pharaoh wearing a variation on a Khepresh, his name is obviously a play on Amun-Ra… yeah, they’re Egyptian. So, in two different adaptations Sonic has been given explicit African ancestry.
@ifirestone​ also pointed out to me that Sonic Adventure 2 has a lot of hedgehogs all over the pyramid locations, and @nonbinarycharmybee​ pointed out that his shoes are based off of Michael Jackson’s shoes in the music video for “Bad;” Jackson is a very celebrated African-American musician. And @killer-squirtle​ pointed out that his design is most likely based on an African Pygmy Hedgehog, which live in “west, central and east Africa.”
Then in Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022), there’s a scene where Sonic messes with his quillstyle and is seen experimenting with different styles. Before he settles on the mohawk (very much resembling his AoSTH-SatAM style), he tries out what looks like a Flat Top haircut and Natural Afro; in the latter, he specifically strikes a pose very reminiscent of the 60s Disco Era, which was suuuper associated with African-Americans.
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Finally (so far), Sonic’s first english voice actor was Jaleel White for the first three television shows, who is Black; he set the standard for english!Sonic’s voice and what he should sound like. Sonic’s newest VA for Sonic Prime, Devon Mack, is also Black!
Edit 07/15/2022: @birdsareblooming​ noticed that in Sonic and the Secret Rings, Sonic is reading the Arabian Nights in Arabic, which is the official language of Egypt as well as several other African and Southwest Asian countries!
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As we’ve established Sonic is Egyptian, I think we can also safely assume that his bio fam is as well– Sonia and Manic were in that Underground episode after all, and as Underground doesn’t seem to give them a father I think we can safely assume that the royal lineage is through Aleena. Metal Sonic is a robot but as he’s supposed to be near identical to Sonic, I think we can put Metal under the same coding (no pun intended).
Antoine Depardieu/D’Coolette the Coyote – French
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Antoine is very very obviously coded as French, first in the SatAM television show he debuted in and then in the Archie comics. His original surname, Depardieu, is a French surname– I don’t believe D’Coolette is a real surname but it is supposed to sound French with the “d’[x]” structure.
Antoine speaks in an exaggerated French accent, which is spelled phonetically in the comics so that it can still come across. He often (at least in SatAM– I’m not as knowledgeable on Archie canon) needs help understanding English words and asks for translations or butchers pronunciation. He also uses the French phrases “qui” and “sacre bleu.” Unfortunately, in SatAM he also falls into the French Coward Stereotype, which seems to have begun in the 40s and shot into prominence in the United States in the early 2000s.
Babylon Rogues (Jet/Wave/Storm) – Iraqi
The Babylon Rogues are ABSOLUTELY Iraqi. How do we know this? They are literally called the Babylon Rogues. 
In case u didn't know, Babylon was an ancient empire that was p powerful in the BC years. Its capitol town– named, you know, Babylon– was an independent city-state and for a while the largest city in the world. They also had one of the seven wonders of the world, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon The city of Babylon, whose remains are now a world heritage site, is now what is currently Hillah, Babil Governorate, Iraq.
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The Babylon Rogues are clearly named after the Babylonian empire. Their home base is also literally named the Babylon Garden, a reference to the Hanging Gardens. I’m not super knowledgeable on architecture, but the design of the Garden seems to be similar to the Umayyad or Abbasid architectural movements of Iraq.
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This all very much codes the Rogues as being descendants of the Babylonian empire, ie: Iraqi.
Bark the Polar Bear – Russian
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This is gonna be one of the shorter ones, but a 1996 interview with Hiroshi Kataoka, head of SEGA AM2, says that Bark is “a Polar Bear who lives in Russia.”
I don’t believe Bark is given any specific Russian coding following that, but it should be noted that that was the original intention.
Blaze the Cat – Southern Asian
Blaze’s concept designs can be pretty South Asian-coded first off; in the middle bottom row in the pic above, you can see her wearing Shalwar, (maybe shalwar kameez? it's hard to tell what kinda top she has) which is a popular Southern and Central Asian fashion. 
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Her final design includes a straight-up bindi– listed as such on the Sonic wiki. Bindi are a mark on the forehead worn by women in Hinduism, Buddhism and Jainism, and occasionally Islam (notably in Pakistan during Eid). While obviously anyone of any race can be of any religion, as the bindi originated in Southern Asia, it’s highly associated with that area and is worn by, well, a crapton of people in South and Southeast Asia, for both cultural and religious reasons.
Also, her kingdom: we don’t see it much in the games (in Rush Adventure, they’re mostly traveling through outlying islands and ruins), but we do see it in the IDW comics.
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It seems very inspired by Mughal architecture, an Indo-Islamic style developed from Indian, Islamic, Iranian and Central Asian traditions.
In the mobile game Sonic Forces: Speed Battle, Blaze is given a costume for Lunar New Year, as is Silver (see Elise’s section for more Silver info). Lunar New Year is associated mainly with China, but is celebrated in several other Asian countries, including Indonesia, Japan, Malaysia, the Philippines, Singapore, South Korea, Thailand, and Vietnam.
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We also got THIS tweet from the official Sonic account in November 2020, showing her having tea in her palace. @penosh-wom​ pointed out to me that the patterns in the room are “VERY reminiscent of India,” and that the scenery outside looks very much like the Asian coast. 
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The caption is in Japanese, but translating it to English shows that the descriptive is literally “Indian summer with calm waves.” An Indian summer is a term for unusually long hot weather in autumn, but like. Come on.
With that, I would say Blaze is most likely Indian, though the coding is a little vague. She is at the very least Asian, likely South or Southeast.
Bunnie Rabbot – Southern American
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Bunnie seems to be coded as coming from the Southern United States (or at least the Mobius equivalent); she has a Southern US accent, for instance, and similar to Antoine in written media it is spelled phonetically so that it continues to come across; using “ah” instead of “I,” often cutting off the “g” in words ending in “-ing,” etc. Many of her sayings– such as “oh my stars”– are distinctly Southern US as well. This was all established in her SatAM appearances and continued into the Archie comics.
Should be noted that also, very unfortunately, one early Archie comic had her say several things to reference support for the Confederacy as a way of tying into her Southern heritage. Thankfully, as far as I’m aware this has only appeared in this issue and has never occurred again.
Princess Elise (+Soleanna, possibly Silver) – Italian
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Soleanna as a country is incredibly inspired by the city of Venice, Italy, to the point where Silver’s original name was Venice. The city is known for being built on 118 small islands connected by canals and bridges, with it often being called the “floating city.”
The amount of canals and bridges in Soleanna is definitely an intentional reference, as well as the very Venetian Architecture of the buildings.
Now, Silver– While it’s unclear if Silver is from his timeline’s Soleanna, he does have a bit of Italian coding as well!
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Firstly, his original design was literally named Venice. (design in the pic, bottom left.) And there’s one other little detail– in Sonic and the Black Knight, when you play as Silver (Sir Galahad), his sword looks a LOT like a Cinquedea– an Italian dagger.
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Silver being Italian is a bit less certain than the rest of Soleanna, though– the original name and dagger are the only implications and he hasn’t had much since. In Sonic Forces: Speed Battle he is given a Lunar New Year outfit, which could imply he is of Asian descent (see: Blaze); of course he could be mixed, or simply celebrating with Blaze (who also had a Lunar New Year outfit release at the same time). So while Silver isn’t certain, I will say the inclusion of the Cinquedea interested me enough to note him here.
Espio the Chameleon – Japanese
Espio is definitely coded as Japanese throughout his appearances. Firstly, and most obviously, his special interest in being a Ninja; ninjas were mercenaries or covert agents in feudal Japan, incredibly skilled in martial arts and ninjutsu, and they were often used as spies or bodyguards. Japanese legend would also often associate the ninja with invisibility, a major part of Espio’s powerset. Espio’s favor for the shuriken stars as a weapon also tie into this, as well as the fact that in the Japanese script he uses the old-fashioned formal pronouns “ware” and “onushi.”
That’s not all, though, of course: Espio has been stated in the Sonic City character profiles to be “a lover of traditional ways,” specifically referencing his ability to play the shamisen, a traditional Japanese instrument. He is seen playing this instrument in the Chaotix’s Sonic Heroes Team Blast.
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@nonbinarycharmybee​​ also pointed out that in THIS official artwork from Sonic Channel in 2021, Espio is seen writing with an ink brush used in Japanese calligraphy.
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Gold the Tenrec – Indian
Gold is specifically stated by creator Evan Stanley to be from “whatever the Sonic World equivalent” of India is. This is shown in her design as well: her outfit consists of a brown sari, which is a very popular and traditional style in India, as well as nearby Southern Asian countries.
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Knuckles the Echidna (+Clan) – Jamaican + Mesoamerican
Oooh Knuckles is interesting, strap in everyone!
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According to Sonic Advance 2: Prima's Official Strategy Guide, Knuckles was originally intended to speak with a Jamaican accent. As well as this, the green/yellow/red color scheme of his shoes was intended to reference the Rastafari flag, Rastafarianism being a religion developed in Jamaica. This heritage can also be seen reflected in his dreadlocks– his quill-style is referred to as such in many canon places. In real life, dreadlocks are a Black hairstyle; the 2011 official census of Jamaica listed 92.1% of the population as Black, and dreadlocks are often associated with the Rastafari movement, as Rastas regard them as a symbol of strength and it emerged as a traditional religious style in the 1940s.
This isn’t the only coding Knuckles gets, though; he is known to be descended from the Knuckles Clan, which are heavily inspired by Mesoamerican cultures.
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The Sonic Adventure team traveled through Central and South America to get inspiration for Knuckles’s clan’s culture, which can be seen in basically every aspect of the Clan lore. For instance, clothing worn by the echidnas is very similar to the traditional styles of the Aztecs and Mayas. This includes the decorative feathers seen on Pachacamac and the filmverse!Clan, as feathers were popular and prized materials in pre-colonial Mesoamerca.
Their architecture is almost identical to the step-pyramid temples of the Aztecs, Mayas and Toltecs. The same architecture and clothing style can also be seen in Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022), with most of the echidna warriors seen with spears, including baby Knuckles. Throwing spears were used extensively in pre-colonial Mesoamerican battles.
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There is also a large serpent that lives near the Mystic Ruins of the Clan, likely a reference to the Aztecs’ Quetzalcoatl and the Mayas’ Kukulkan.
Also, most obviously, the names: Pachacamac is named after a Peruvian archeological site, which itself was named after the Ichma creator god Pacha Kamaq. Tikal, meanwhile, was named after the archeological ruins of a Maya city, consisting of multiple pyramids.
As a sidenote, it should be noted that Ken Penders’ echidnas in the Archie Comics were definitely supposed to be English: @thankskenpenders​ laid it out very well in this post, but they were written to come from “Mobius’s equivalent of England,” named after the earliest name for Great Britain, and he wrote the species to be “seafaring colonizers.” Penders did write this before the release of Sonic Adventure, but obviously after Knuckles’s initial release with Jamaican-coding, so can we call this whitewashing? I don’t know enough to speak on the subject, but with the reset of Archie comics and its later cancellation, and the games’ Knuckles Clan being represented in several other mediums (such as Sonic X, Sonic the Comic, etc.) I think we can safely say that the Mesoamerican coding is a bit more canon.
Lupe the Wolf (+pack) – Indigenous American
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Lupe the Wolf first appeared in the second season of Sonic SatAM, and from her first appearance was incredibly indigenous-coded, as was her wolf pack. This coding continued through the Archie comics. This will mostly focus on the SatAM coding, as Archie pulled from that and, once again, I don’t know a ton about Archie!Canon, but SatAM is pretty damn obvious with its coding.
Lupe’s pack is described as being a native tribe to the Great Unknown region, who live in “harmony with nature.” Their land was captured and culture destroyed by the invading Robotnik, with the survivors retreating into their civilization’s ruins. In order to keep themselves safe, they set up inscriptions near their cave threatening to curse anyone who wanted to come in; Lupe later readily admits this to Sonic, Sally and Antoine, the latter of whom was scared shitless by the idea of getting cursed.
So, for starters, Indigenous American culture is, in general, built a lot upon a reverence for nature, believing that humans are not masters of nature but merely a part of it and acting accordingly. The capture of their land is obviously intended to be reminiscent of American colonization by the Europeans, which was devastating to the Native tribes, with entire cultures and languages being wiped out and Indigenous people still facing serious oppression in modern times.
Much like the Knuckles Clan, the Wolf Pack’s ruins are reminiscent of many indigenous archeological sites, such as Mesa Verde, which is also built into a cliffside. The brief glimpse we have of the Wolf Pack’s pre-colonized land also shows them living in huts reminiscent of many indigenous tribes.
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The room Lupe gives exposition in also has them all sitting around a smoking fire pit; many indigenous cultures will gather around fires for meetings and discussions.
Lastly, many people (mainly white people) hold the superstition that Indigenous people have the ability to curse them; just think about how much the “this place is haunted because it was built on a Native burial ground” trope is used. The “Magical Native American” trope tends to say that Natives are magical because of their closeness with nature and “lack of civilization.” This very much falls into the Noble Savage trope, making them appear exotic or inhuman to outsiders and trivializes their connection to the natural world.
SatAM does a pretty decent job subverting this trope, with Lupe very clearly stating there is no curse and they use it to make small-minded intruders keep out; this shifts the ridiculousness of the situation onto the non-Native-coded characters.
Sonic: Ant! Forget the curse. There is no stupid curse! Lupe: He's right, Antoine. We use the threat of a curse to keep out intruders. Antoine: No curses? Oh. Phew and phew again. I am so happy to hear that.
- SatAM S2e10, “Cry of the Wolf”
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There have been a few other instances of Indigenous-coding with Sonicverse characters, unfortunately not all of them represented as well. The inhabitants of Speedster Island in the Sonic Underground episode “Head Games” are just as indigenous-coded in their appearance, the episode very much falls into the “Native people need the outsiders to come save them” stereotype, as well as the “Native people mistake outsiders for gods” stereotype. The Gogobas in Sonic Boom are also given indigenous-coding with their chief’s headgear, village huts, and jokes made referencing the “cursed burial grounds” trope and them replacing the captured indigenous children in the parody of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. The Gogobas are not exactly shown in a positive light, though to be fair, neither is anyone in the show; specifically, the Gogobas’ “tradition” is to guilt trip everyone into doing what they want.
For other indigenous coding in major characters, see Knuckles and Rotor sections.
Marine the Raccoon (+Coconut Crew) – Australian
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Marine is very obviously coded as Australian; throughout all of her dialogue, she uses Australian slang, most obviously calling her friends “mate.” She also uses the exclamation “strewth,” which is used often in Australia and Aotearoa. Other slang includes “sheila” (woman), “no drama” (no worries) and “ya mug” (friendly insult, usually for a gullible person). The other koalas on her island, who raised her, also use the same language.
Marine is also given pigtails shaped like boomerangs, a tool heavily associated with Australia, specifically Aboriginal Australian hunting. Koalas are also a species that is native to Australia– I believe only Australia but I can’t be sure. 
I don’t know enough about the coding of their architecture/etc to say if they’re coded as generally Australian or Aboriginal specifically, though I will say they definitely seem to be native to islands, which may imply they are of a Polynesian tribe near Australia or Aotearoa, such as Māori or Tahitian people. 
Should be noted though that Marine appears to be adopted; she was raised by the Coconut Crew, who are all koalas. She does have some serious tanuki coding that may additionally code her as Japanese; for more, see Tails’s section.
Mina Mongoose – Chinese
As far as I’m aware, Mina’s Chinese-coding isn’t super explicit. However, she is seen wearing a red qipao for formal occasions, designed by Jeff Axer.
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The qipao, also known as a cheongsam, is a traditional Chinese dress inspired by the Manchu people (founders of the Qing Dynasty). In modern times, the cheongsam is very popular for festivities such as weddings and holidays (especially Lunar New Year), as well as school and work uniforms.
Mina’s qipao is also specifically given a green dragon design very reminiscent of the Chinese dragon as well as many other Asian dragon species. She also is given ornamental earrings and hair pieces that are very clearly inspired by Chinese fashion.
Nocturnus Clan + Voxai Aliens – Roman/Greek
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Honestly, these clans seem to have coding in name only– they both have specific cultures of their own, with the Voxai architecture specifically being based mainly on the rock and plants of their home planet, and the Nocturnus clan being very futuristic. But it is interesting to note!
The Nocturnus clan army ranks are very similar to Imperial Roman ones, with titles such as hastatus and praetorian. Ix being called the “Imperator” is also a Latin word from which the word “Emperor” is derived, and referred to an army commander. Ix’s Gizoid prefects are also named Scylla and Charyb, a reference to Scylla and Charybdis, two sea monsters in Greek mythology which appeared in the Odyssey. The historian character Nestor the Wise is named after King Nestor of Gerenia, also from the Odyssey as well as the Iliad.
The Voxai names are also derived from Greek and Roman mythology: their name likely comes from the Latin noun “vox,” which refers to a voice and would reference the aliens’ telepathic powers. Most of the named Voxai are given Greek names as well: Thebes is an important city in Greek mythology, Croesus was the last king of Lydia, and Riadne, Leucosia and Ligaia are names of mythological Sirens.
Rotor the Walrus – Inuk
Rotor is not given any specific cultural coding in SatAM or Pre-Super Genesis Wave Archie; however, in Post-SGW Archie, he and his family are given Inuit coding.
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In the post-SGW comics, Rotor is from Artika, a region covered in snow and ice, and we see that the residents live in igluit, traditional homes for inuit in the Central Arctic Canadian area, and the Qaanaaq in Greenland.
Rotor’s community also has an enemy named Akhlut the Orca– in Inuit mythology, the akh’lut is a wolf-orca creature that is known to be aggressive towards humans.
Surge the Tenrec – Japanese
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Surge is a relatively new character to the IDW Comics, so we still have more time to learn about her past/potential culture; for the most part, at this point, her coding comes mainly in her appearance. Surge was designed by Mauro Fonseca and Evan Stanley, with Fonseca listing Japanese delinquents, specifically sukeban, as one of the inspirations for her design.
Sukeban are Japanese delinquent girls, the word usually referring to either an entire gang or the leader herself; they were gangs in the 60s-70s, and now the term tends to refer mainly to fashion inspired by them. Many “common signifiers” of this trend are bright hair and modified school uniforms (cut, decorated, etc).
Many fictional Japanese delinquents share design similarities with Surge, such as “excessive piercings and jewellery” and spiked hair.
Tails the Fox – Japanese(?) / Kitsune
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I put a question mark here because Tails’s coding isn’t specifically on Japanese culture, but on a very specific aspect of its mythology. Tails is very clearly based upon a Kitsune.
Kitsune are mythological foxes with the ability to shapeshift; they have been portrayed in different myths as tricksters and/or guardians. The kitsune are noted for having multiple tails; they are said grow a tail every hundred years, growing up to nine tails. When they reach a thousand years of age, instead of growing a new tail, they ascend to the heavens. The kitsune are notable for their shapeshifting and ability to create illusions.
Tails’s second tail is clearly a reference to the kitsune legend, but while he relies more on technology than magic, there are some suspicious magical incidents around Tails; in Sonic Battle, his attack consists of summoning a giant hand to hit you with. @birdsareblooming​ pointed out to me that in Sonic: Lost World, when Tails stops pretending to be roboticized, his eye color literally shifts from gray to blue, possibly as a reference to the shapeshifting.
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In Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022), the illusion power is referenced with Tails’s “Miles Multiplier,” which he uses to summon holographic copies of himself and others.
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If you look on Tails’s desktop, you can also see something entitled “Kitsune” is running– @khamomile-kitty​ has informed me that it says Arms.Kitsune as a reference to Tyson Hesse’s early parody comic, Hedgehog the Sonic. You can see the file on the bottom left of his screen, though this isn’t a great pic lol.
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There’s also the fact he shares many parallels with Infinite, who has the regular kitsune powers of illusion. Jackals are also very close on the family tree to foxes.
Another interesting thing is Marine– her being Blaze’s dimension’s Tails is interesting, as she is likely not a raccoon but a tanuki. She looks much more similar to a real tanuki, and in mythology tanuki and kitsune tend to be enemies with similar powersets. Speaking of Tanuki– Tails is also the first to be suspicious of Dodon Pa, a canon tanuki. He says specifically, “There’s something about this Tanuki I just don’t trust.”
Is he a kitsune in canon or is this just a reference to Japanese mythology? Pre-SGW Archie Comics gives Tails regular fox parents, so his tail seems to be a canon mutation there. However, every other canon has Tails completely oblivious to his past, seeming to not know his parents and likely having been abandoned. In Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, for example, he has no memory of his parents and just says he’s “been alone for a long time” and is confused at the fact not everyone has two tails. So honestly, it’s completely unknown whether he’s a canon kitsune or simply coded.
Whisper the Wolf – Japanese
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Whisper’s coding is very specific: her mask and her eyes. Whisper’s mask was chosen from a character customization option in Sonic Forces, and was specifically inspired by Japanese Kabuki masks. (Kabuki is a traditional Japanese dance-drama form known for its elaborate costuming, makeup, and masks.)
Whisper’s eyes being almost always closed is partially inspired by traditional depictions of kitsunes with “those iconic squinty-closed eyes.” (See Tails’s section for more kitsune information.) Sega of Japan approved her design as wolves serve the same roles as kitsune in older Japanese folklore.
Vector the Crocodile – Black American
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Vector has had quite a bit of black coding over the years, in both positive and negative ways.
Vector is given an appearance shared with/stereotypical of a lot of Black American musicians, particularly in the rapper and hip-hop categories– specifically, his gold chain jewelry, leather clothing, and wireless headphones, esp their positioning in his models. As Vector is a musician, they definitely chose this specific musican-attire for him for a reason. Also, right now, his current English voice actor is Keith Silverstein, a black man.
A lot of Vector’s personality could be read as stereotypical, and at the same time those personality traits could be seen as inverted depending on the source material: he could fall into the “bossy overconfident” stereotype, or that could be seen as subverted due to the fact he is actually competent at his job. He could fall into the “money-hungry” and/or “always poor” trope, or this trait could be seen as relatable due to all of us hating landlords and rent with a passion. He could be “will do anything for money” or he could be presented as someone with strong morals who will always do what is right.
In some media he is seen as hotheaded and aggressive (”Angry Black Man”), while in others he keeps a cool head in times of danger and takes care of his team. You could see him as a “massive flirt” or as just someone who happens to be head-over-heels in love with Vanilla. Hell, his loud music interest could be seen as joking about Black music being “too loud,” or it could be seen as him, you know, just enjoying music!
All this depends on the medium. I don’t feel educated enough on the subject to make a call as to whether he’s a positive or negative stereotype overall, though I think I can say with certainty that Penders’ writing of him in the Archie comics was racist as hell. As @thankskenpenders​ explained in her article, “Vector was the jive-talking comic relief character. He was obnoxious, he was dim-witted, he was crude, he’d randomly bring up rap music. One time he started singing ‘Dem Bones’ to himself while held captive by the Dark Legion. He was also extremely misogynistic.” Thank God Penders is out...
Master Zik the Zeti – Chinese
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Zik’s appearance and characterization are based upon early Chinese poets, who are given a lot of respect in their society, as Zik is given respect among the Zeti.
Zik can definitely fall into the Inscrutable Oriental trope, with his “reserved and stoic” personality. He is also part of the Old Master trope (though he is a villainous rather than heroic character, as is traditional), which tends to intersect with the Magical Asian trope in martial arts stories, most famously in America in The Karate Kid; this inspiration can be seen in most of Zik’s calm dialogue and past as Zavok’s mentor, and the emphasis on his position as a powerful master. His hair is likely a reference to the stereotypical Fu Manchu moustache, and his entrance music is stylized after traditional Chinese music.
Zik also spends his semi-retirement in the garden he tends; this could potentially be a reference to Chinese gardens, which are very important in Chinese literature and philosophy. His game profile also mentions he likes to water his Bonsai tree; while the Bonsai is Japanese, it is derived from traditional Chinese penjing art.
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country girls make do
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fandom : one piece tags : zosan (if you squint), anal masturbation, exhibitionism, porn without plot without porn, its not really porn, it is corn though a/n : repost of an old ao3 fic i thought tumblr would like.
God this was stupid, Zoro scolded himself. His toes curled with the ache. He needed something, anything, he'd gone for weeks without jacking it, and when he tried to rub one out he felt so, so empty.
So there he was, in the pantry late at night, with a cob of corn stuck up his ass. The texture felt great against his rim, struggling to accommodate the girth from the lack of lube, causing Zoro to slightly regret not buying some and instead opting to spit in his own hand.
He groaned. It was hitting so deep, those ridges pushing against his prostate as it dragged past. He huffed, he needed to relax so he could really enjoy this. If he closed his eyes he could imagine a shapeless person with a colorful toy attached to a strap-on. His free hand toyed with his chest, yeah, just like that.
Just as he was finally getting into his fantasy and letting out choked moans, that stupid fucking curly-brow ruined everything. The cook screamed Luffy's name, likely thinking the person in the pantry was Luffy looking for a midnight snack. He kicked the door open continuing his tirade until he saw Zoro.
Zoro.
The swordsman, three-sword-style, pirate hunter, one billion bounty, slayer of King, first mate of an Emperor, Roronoa Zoro.
With a cob of corn shoved most of the way up his ass.
Sanji stopped dead in his tracks, attempting to process the scene in front of him. There was no way this was real. Zoro was on his back, legs spread and hips up, one hand still gripping his cock while the other held the cob of fucking corn still in his ass. It's not like he hadn't seen the shitty marimo in various states of undress or had the dumb swordsman walk in on him while he was jerking it, but this was another level entirely. Did the marimo actually get completely naked for this? What is he thinking, of course he did, he loves being as naked as possible.
And, wait, a COB OF CORN!?
Sanji's foot collided with the moss-man's head in an instant, shouting at him. "You took one of our fresh vegetables that Nami-swan so generously provided the funds for and you shoved it up your damn ass!?" The marimo rubbed the bruise Sanji left. "I will not tolerate wasting food on this ship while I am on it, and I will go as far as to-"
"'M not wasting it." Zoro grumbled, cutting Sanji off.
"I can't hear you when you mumble. Speak English, not moss."
"I said I'm not wasting it." Zoro's mouth split into that shit-eating grin he always got when he thought he was going to win an argument. His hand snaked back down to his hips, where he slowly pushed the corn inside further, sighing. "I'm using it.'
Sanji's entire face went red. He huffed angrily, turning sharply on his heels. It was rare that Zoro managed to fluster the cook (without bringing up the concept of women, of course, that'd be too easy) but the tips of his ears were pink even as he marched to the door.
"Just let me know when you're finished so I can kick your ass." Sanji hissed through his teeth.
"M'kay. It'll be sore already though."
"Oh, fuck off."
Sanji slammed the door.
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