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#good song im sad it got cut off in the actual movie :(
andonutty · 6 months
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ok get ready for SPAM for the character meme thing : first one up? the beloved, the amazing, the most blorbo to ever blorbo ... randy sealman 🥺
send me a character and i'll list...
i'm going to be slowly working through all of these so @ anyone who wants feel free to send more of them! i'm never not accepting these. though if like 5 years down the line you send me the name of a character i'll probably be confused i'm not going to lie
favorite thing about them
EVERYHTINGGNGNG!??!?!?! though i think maybe my FAVOURITE thing about him is how sensitive and sad he is. like yeah sure he's got his "don't even fuckin' start" and "take that shit off" lines but his longest scene has him being so sad and emotional and sensitive?? and then we get the moment where he's like FULLY ass out for this girl he does NOT know?? UGH randy sealman you are the most mentally ill man to ever exist
least favorite thing about them
the fact that he has inconsistent crazy lore and also that he dies and that 0 people care
favorite line
"borden's dead. someone executed him." it is just SUCH a pookie line and he is SOOOOO?!?!?!???!?! so cute for this. obviously i love all his lines but this one is so PARTICULARLY pookie.
brOTP
randy and the bordens for sure. i think their dynamic is so tragically unexplored. like putting aside the fact that i ship randy and william HARD like ... they just seem like such a fun trio? i just think they are so cute and tragic. it's about randy really thinking these two are his BEST friends, meanwhile they both resent him so much after a while. it's just sad!!
OTP
OBVIOUSLY randy/tyler DUHHH. they are so cute and perfect for each other and they fuel me daily. there's something about hole from a man who is so impossibly sad. also im completely enamoured with our lore for them. but inside the actual source material, i would absolutely say randy/william. it's about william's little spat "you're an emPLOYee!" like oh girl you are projecting. you're having a little gayboy moment. honestly josh and daniel killed this movie they put their entire pussy into it and they're the best parts of it so even if their dynamic weren't so compelling i'd absolutely adore them as a couple simply because their characters are so good
nOTP
randy x duolingo girl. also randy x like hugo?? whatever the fuck his name is? creepy ass dude??? basically randy x any rancid character
random headcanon
i think randy really loves the water. this is sort of pulled from josh taylor and stuff about his roles and his insta and stuff, but i think it really fits for randy for him to love the water and swimming and stuff. it also adds a lot to his and maryanne's relationship
unpopular opinion
i love randy sealman and he deserves to live
song i associate with them
obviously deep in the night jay frog remix but i also want to personally shout out not allowed by tv girl and also nocturne by sufferer. i can't listen to deep in the night while writing him so i often listen to a feeling of power from the heavy rain soundtrack instead. i think when i write him i'm usually listening to nocturne though because tv girl, while a bop and super fun to jam to, it's harder to write to imo
favorite picture of them
i think my ultimate favourite picture has to be pool sex but i am also sharing when randy is like REHAB?? and also when he hugs his mommy in the saddest scene known to cinema. imagine your mom holds your face and is like you need help randy and you look so incredibly sad and then you hug her and start crying and say "i'm sorry" like EUGHFHGD. also his ass out picture is a huge fav and it's under the cut
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this man was really waiting for this girl to come back from the bathroom and peg him. INSANE.
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also not them being SO disrespectful on his cringe fail suspect board and having so many picture of his naked bloodied self. like GIVE HIM SOME DIGNITY
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cold-r-ain-in-june · 1 year
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so a few weeks ago @steadfast sent me an ask wondering how i manage to gather the pieces of media for my web weavings
unfortunately,  it just happened that when you sent me that ask i was one foot in the grave with a fever and ever since i got better i've been procrastinating writing you a reply since i wanted to give you my best answer
double unfortunately, tumblr decided to delete the post and your ask when i was almost done, so i'll try to write it again even though i'm frustrated over the original getting deleted so bear with me
so to start off, i happen to suffer from the horrible condition called sometimes-i-feel-things-so-strongly-i-want-to-cut-open-my-skin-to-let-them-out. a horrible illness really. things like anger or missing my ex or chronic sadness. sometimes, rarely, it happens to be love, though much less often then i would like.
basically, i bottle things up to the point in which i cant help but see them everything. i see a random poem on my instagram feed, i listen to a song on the bus and one of the lyrics clicks like it never had before, a scene from a movie a watched 3 years ago comes to haunt me at night when i cant sleep.
so i gather them, sometimes, i make new folders for them, other times i am so lazy and messy i just let them get lost and rot with the other 10k of screenshots i have on my phone.
obviously, i also have to outright search for things, but i dont even do it for the sake of creating a web weaving post at first. i just feel one thing so deeply i have to look up proof that people have been also feeling this thing for thousands of years and theyve all dealt with it. i mostly search them here on tumblr and sometimes pinterest. words like "friendship", like "medea", like "toxic siblings", they can all open doors to pieces of media you have never heard of before, but which contain a three line dialogue youd kill for from the first time you read it. this all very tricky, evidently, at times, things simply dont match with the way you actually feel, no matter how much you search for them, but stitching them together can give you this almost perfect thing that mirrors your soul.
i also happen to be the kind of person who screenshots everything they think its relevant. and its good that i have really low standards for relevance. thats how i end up diving in my screenshots pile, when i feel like my web searching is failing, and sometimes i get lucky enough and i find a line i collected 2 years ago that matches exactly how i feel in that moment.
you've also mentioned the question of whenever i memorize book passages, and the answer is somewhere between yes and no. while, when i read i heavily annotate my books, im not a big fan of memorising outright passages (my brain is mush lets be honest, i cant fry it even more with overloading), and i dont write them down or anything, but i do however manage to memorize the overall idea of passages that stick to me. liek i can tell that x book has some quote about y thing even if i dont remember it outright. then i try to look it up, i use goodreads mostly (which is a bitch on mobile but you can work your way around if you search shit on web AND THEN you open it with the app) and google books when it decides to be helpful every once in a while, and if neither of those work, THEN, i open my edition and try to look for it because im lazy like that.
another site i really like, and its obvious in my web weavings is gentle.earth!! which, now that i say it, i actually havent visited it in a while but since i remembered it exists ill probably stalk it for the next few weeks. it's an anymous site on which everyone can confess things that hang heavy on them and some of them get to be displayed on the page after the entires are curated. its a really pretty thing to look through
now that i covered the bases of obtaining the materials for the web weaving, which i think i can boil down to 1. hysterical search mission and 2. hoarding every piece of media you come across, i will also add that at least for me personall, putting them in order for is a pain in the ass (which is also the maine reason i havent made a web weaving in almost a year even though i have the materials ready). i dont know if other people who do this kind of things are as press as i am about the order in which each post go and the way the different shades of the same idea interwine and bullshit bullshit or if im just mental. but yeah its also a really important step for me, its basically the polish of the post ig
also the biggest problem with the hoarding strategy is spending 2 days looking for a source because your past self was too lazy to also screenshot the source. thats also a bitch
anyway, i honestly i have no idea if youll find anything helpful here, or if i just used your ask to moan about my struggles but its 3 am over here and honestly this is the best ive got. thank you for the ask though, i do love getting ask even if it takes me two decades to answer them <3
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lion-buddy · 3 years
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hey i just watched the kny movie for the 3rd time, so imma share some thoughts i have for funs :3 (so spoilers below)
i like how each dream interpreted nezuko differently.  in tanjiro’s, shes the most accurate to how she looked, sounded, and acted as a human, which makes sense since tanjiro grew up with her  then in zenitsu’s dream, shes his interpretation of human nezuko.  She still has her pink demon eyes and copper tips.  Her voice is also different, much cuter and more demure (I have so much praise for her va).  Zenitsu has never seen or heard human nezuko, and i love that the movie/manga shows that and shows her in zenitsu’s “ideal” image of her
the two demons at the start had really cool designs and im sad that they got killed off so quick, but at least it was in an awesome fashion 
i loved how all the kids under enmu’s command looked really tired.  poor things just want sleep
all the music is so good. rengoku vs akaza is such a great song.
im glad they didnt make us feel bad for enmu. the guy was a terrible person with a really good design, voice and plan.  he was fun to watch
even though it was so frustrating to see akaza get away, the movie/manga does an amazing job at also showing that frustration in its characters.  it created such a great moment for tanjiro and rengoku 
   (k this next part’s a bit more character analysis driven)
Idk why, but rengoku’s arc and death specifically makes me very emotional. In a series full of death and tragedy, why was it is his death that really stuck with me?  I was really not to attached to his character at first, yet his impact on The Boys really made me understand his position in the story. He’s the cool, amazing, supportive older brother, not only to our main guys, but his own family as well. So when he does die, to see all those sibling connections get cut really gets to me I guess (I’m a real sucker for sibling dynamics).
Also, the different ways the boys reacted to his death stuck out to me. Tanjiro interacted with rengoku the most during his death. Clearly, he was heartbroken, and angry too. You’d think anger would be more of a trait displayed by only inosuke, but I was surprised and genuinely moved by tanjiro’s frustrations And zenitsu, who was hardly there at all and didn’t witness his actual death and fight, took a minute to actually cry. He saw tanjiro upset, and it made him upset, showing how empathetic he is. And his crying isn’t his typically dramatic screaming, but genuine sadness that he feels and is receiving off of tanjiro. (That shot of him with his arm over his face is when I started to cry as well) And Inosuke While used as comic relief in this scene, his reaction was accurate to his character. Of course he’d want to push those sensitive emotions aside, he already had trouble understanding sympathy and empathy, feeling it this strongly must be very strange. (On a side note I’m glad we get to see him take care of tanjiro after the train crashes, showing us how he’s grown to be more gentle and genuinely cares for the safety of his friends). He doesn’t want to see his friends this sad, he wants to be able to move on and just keep fighting, but he doesn’t really know how to in this moment. He stands off to the side for a duration of the scene, and we can see he’s shaking as he’s taking a long time to process everything.  And his only solution is distraction, and desperately tries to pull his friends to fight with him so they can all move on. Inosuke is the support these two really need when dealing with grief and sadness, and I think he will be very important for them in the future.
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kaylorrehabcenter · 3 years
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Rating Every Song on Fearless Based on How Gay it is
Hello friends! I still have a few song analyses in the pipeline (and one on Lover the album) but today in honor of Fearless (Taylor’s Edition) being announced and Love Story being released in a few hours I thought I’d do something fun to celebrate!
And you know what? Fuck my usual disclaimer, I am the word of god here. Try and change my mind about any of these. I dare you. (I kid I kid this isn’t that serious and you’re free to disagree <3)
1. Fearless 15/10
Everything about this song is so fucking gay oh my god. This isn’t a fruit, this is a whole ass edible arrangement. As a small rural town Gay (my hometown has a population of less that 4,000 and where I’m living now has a population of 2,500) this uh. Hits.
“And I don't know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first, fearless”
Y’ALL
The idea of falling in love with someone who makes you less afraid of your homophobic small town…….it’s getting to me.
“My hands shake, I'm not usually this way but/You pull me in and I'm a little more brave/It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really something/It's fearless”
This is making me emotional, I'll be honest. I see so much of my friends and my experience in high school in this song. 
This quote I found on genius is from when the album was released on BMR’s website.
“When I wrote ‘Fearless,’ I wasn’t dating anyone. I wasn’t even in the beginning stages of dating anybody. I really was all by myself out on tour and I got this idea for a song about the best first date. I think sometimes when you’re writing love songs, you don’t write them about what you’re going through at the moment, you write about what you wish you had. So, this song is about the best first date I haven’t had yet.”
This just screams baby Tay writing gay folklore to me, about the gay stories she wish she had. Notice how there are no pronouns in this song??? Fruity I’m telling you.
All that to say. I’m crying because the linear note says “I loved you before I met you” and I want to go listen to Long Story Short and cry now.
2. Fifteen 1/10
Objectively pretty straight as she’s singing about her and Abigail’s dating boys in HS. And Taylor got with a senior guy. Good for her I suppose.
Unless he was one of the shitty ones in which case.
“This is life before you know who you're gonna be”
This however, is a cute line and the whole song makes me warm and nostalgic. You can also hear her crying after the line “and Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind” which makes me emo and I’m sure will take on new depth after Abigail’s divorce and hurt me even more.
Other highlights that make me sob include.
“When all you wanted was to be wanted/Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now/Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday/But I realized some bigger dreams of mine”
Bigger dreams of hers indeed :’)
(Also how can you say she’s a gold star lesbian when this song exists. She was obviously dating boys in high school and even if you think she’s a lesbian. Comp het is a hell of a drug kids.)
3. Love Story 8/10
Tried to change the ending indeed.
This is THE Taylor Swift song, and maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but damn I still love it. Written because she wanted to change the ending of Romeo and Juliet (how anyone likes RandJ enough to want to rewrite I have no clue.) and/or because her parents didn’t approve of a guy she was seeing. (according to genius, it would’ve been too early for Joe J so it could possibly be Boys Like Girls frontman, his image did clash with hers and they did release some cute songs together. However if you want my take it’s probably folklore about Emily, take for what you will)
This song has very oft gay vibes with the ‘They don’t approve of our love angle!’ but uses male pronouns so points redacted for that. HOWEVER this is a very early use of ~the male perspective~ in Taylor’s songs and for that it deserves all the love.
“ So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew/So close your eyes/Escape this town for a little while”
More rural town angst!!!
Nothing gets me more than rural town angst.
“Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it's real”
Originally the lyric was “this love is different”. Granted I do not remember the source, i’s just lore implanted into my brain, but make of that what you will.
“"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone/I love you, and that's all I really know/I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress/It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes"”
Marry me Juliet from the male perspective :)
Also worth noting. This is Karlie’s (and Kim K’s lmao) favorite Taylor song which. While basic as hell. Makes this cover sad as hell to this former Kaylor. (thanks @swiftgron-get-married for the tears <3)
Also not to make this about a man AGAIN but the secret message is “Some day I’ll find this” AND SHE DID IM CRYING.
4. Hey Stephen 1/10
The one thing Camilla Cabello and I have in common is loving this song, so I have to live with that for the rest of my life.
This song is very painfully straight.
How can you think this woman is a gold star lesbian.
The only noteworthy thing is that this is one of the few songs she confirms who it’s about. The secret message is “Love and Theft” which is the name of a country music duo who went on to open her Fearless tour. Which, does make me side eye this song a little bit.
Still a cute song.
“Hey Stephen, boy, you might have me believing/I don't always have to be alone”
5. White Horse 1/10
Oh look. It’s track five. 
You know maybe this is just me being a bitch but in my ranking of track fives this is. Pretty low. Maybe on the bottom.
Like I don’t have a lot to say about it. 
She’s going through it over a guy. He was a cheating dickweazel. 
“'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale/I'm gonna find someone someday/Who might actually treat me well”
“Try and catch me now, oh/It's too late/To catch me now”
These lines hit though!!
And she found Joe!! Who treats her well!!!! And she isn’t the princess, she’s the prince who dropped her sword and knocked on her door!!! But this time if they come for them she’s ready!!!
Yes I will make every song about Long Story Short <3
6. You Belong With Me 5/10
Ah yes. The other THE Taylor Swift song.
You know. If I went to a high school with a cheerleading squad. And I had a crush on a cheerleader. I would blast this song. So for that it gets a 5/10. Otherwise. Fairly straight and fairly iconic.
7. Breathe 8/10
Well. We know this one is about a woman. (Emily Poe for those not in the know. Ha. A rhyme!) That alone has an 8/10. And it’s the first time she has a featured artist so bonus points for that!
It was nominated for a Grammy and it fucking lost to Jason Mraz. When’s the last time you thought about Jason Mraz.
I will not have Kaylor feels on a fucking Fearless song but damn is it VERY easy.
“Never a clean break, no one here to save me/You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand”
“It's 2 A.M, feeling like I just lost a friend/Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me”
Also this bridge? Goes off. HIGHLY underrated. 
8. Tell Me Why 3/10
You know. Maybe this album isn’t as gay as I once thought.
This song does bop though, not as good as her other angry songs on this album. But I can vibe with this you know. Why are you being an asshole mysterious man.
“You could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day”
This has to be one of baby Tay’s best burns. Damn. 
“Why do you have to make me feel small/So you can feel whole inside?/Why do you have to put down my dreams/So you're the only thing on my mind?”
Men ain’t shit kids. However, bonus points for the shade. 
9. You’re not Sorry 1/10
Ok, ok. Maybe this was a foolish endeavor.
Because yet again we have a very straight song. A good song. That was on Taylor’s episode of CSI. But oh dear. Very straight. Gets a measly one point. We started this post off so very very gay but damn. We seem to be nearing the end on a very straight note.
10. The Way I Loved You 20/10
Hey Remember what I said about this album being very straight.
WELL THAT WAS A LIE.
Is this a comphet album or am I projecting.
This is one of my favorite baby gay Taylor songs. Her masterful use of pronouns (he is sensible! And so incredible! And all my single friends are jealous! But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, when it was two am and I was cursing your name!) makes the other person she’s singing about completely vague, while we know she isn’t happy with whichever guy she’s dating.
Mayhaps an early reaction to PRomances?
Either way this song is so good, truly an underrated gay gem I mean. Look at it.
“Breaking down and coming undone/It's a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that's the way I loved you”
AND THE BRIDGE. Do all of her gay songs just have kickass bridges?
“He can't see the smile I'm faking/And my heart's not breaking/'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating/Intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now…”
Damn. I’m imaging this with 2020 vocals and fucking ascending.
Also please watch the live performance of it from the Fearless tour. It’s such a damn shame this got cut from the movie and some woman in the front row is wearing a cowboy hat. Everyone is holding up those cameras everyone had to have before smartphones. Taylor is being endearing. It’s a good time.
11. Forever and Always 6/10
Bonus points for the ~drama~ of it all. Added last minute to the album? The iconic throwing of the chair in live performances?? All of it very dramatique and for that we stan.
Still pretty straight.
Also Joe Jonas responded to the song and why do I find his response so damn funny. “It’s part of being a musician, I guess. You write songs about each other.”
This is another song where the idea of Taylor’s grown up vocals on this is………..whew
12. The Best Day 0/10
This gets zero points because it’s about her literal mom.
Still makes me cry.
God bless Andrea Swift indeed
13. Change 13/10
We start the official tracklist with a gay song. We end it with a gay song.
We will ignore that it was originally written for Scott and BMR and instead induct it into the hall of gay pride anthems, as it should be. 
“We're getting stronger now, finding things they never found/They might be bigger but we're faster and never scared/You can walk away, say we don't need this/But there's something in your eyes says we can beat this”
“This revolution, the time will come/For us to finally win/And we'll sing hallelujah, we'll sing hallelujah”
The music video is cringe though lol
14. Jump then Fall 10/10
This song is gay because I choose it to be. <3
Like. Picture baby Taylor writing this song and playing it on her guitar to a girl she has a crush on telling her that she’ll protect her and they’ll be safe and in love and happy together. Gah, maybe I’m ~projecting~ but this sweet ass song always gets me and is EASILY in my top five Taylor songs. Super underrated and hecking cute. 
“We're on the phone and without a warning/I realize your laugh is the best sound/I have ever heard”
Like. Look at this shit.
“I watch you talk, you didn't notice/I hear the words but all I can think is/We should be together”
Tell me this is about the first time you get a crush on a girl and she’s your best friend and she’s amazing and beautiful and you realize you kinda want to kiss her and you hope she wants to kiss you too.
“I had time to think it oh, over/And all I can say is come closer/Take a deep breath and jump then fall into me”
And she’s the Romeo who's going to protect her!!!!! She’s the knight in shining armor in this song and I love that for her??
“The bottom's gonna drop out from under our feet/I'll catch you, I'll catch you/When people say things that bring you to your knees/I'll catch you/The time is gonna come when you're so mad you could cry/But I'll hold you through the night until you smile”
I won’t divulge into full on analysis here because. This is what this post is about but PLEASE listen to this song more. It’s such a gay little gem.
15. Untouchable 9/10
How does she make a cover sound gay.
It sounds so gay.
“You got to come on, come on, say that we'll be together/Come on, come on, little taste of heaven”
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
16. Forever and Always Piano Version 1/10
This song gets 1/10 because I don’t like it. There. I said it.
17. Come in With the Rain 3/10
I can see why this is a bonus track. It doesn’t hit me as much as the other songs on the album.
But damn if I don’t want to scream sing this one driving down a high way.
18. Superstar 7/10
You can’t tell me this song is about a man. I simply won’t entertain the idea.
You cannot prove to me that this song is about a man. There is not a male pronoun in sight. 
>:)
19. The Other Side of the Door 6/10
Is this song about having a fight about being in the closet? Probably not. Will my gay little brain make it about that? Yep!
And that, funky little queer pals, is my gay rating of every Fearless song. Like and subscribe, #t3atmidnight
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whosaskingwrites · 3 years
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The Sound Of Love (Tsukishima x Reader)
A/N: Um I don't like this one as much as the others but I did my best. It honestly took forever cause I didn't want to write it and I had no idea what song to use but I eventually decided so here we are.
WARNINGS: angst
Date: Saturday November 7th, 2020
Details: 5.3 pages 2,000 words
Theme: Musicalia- The victim will hear a song constantly playing in their head until it drives them insane. The person of affection will only hear the music when they are around the victim.
Angst Masterlist
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Clair De Lune
A simple, beautiful piano melody that had been repeating in my head for weeks. There was never a reprieve from the beautifully haunting melody. My mind followed the sound like a moth to a flame and deteriorated the closer it got to the music.
No amount of holding my hands over my ears stopped it. It had become a part of me like the backround music in a video game or movie. However this wasn't a video game or a movie this was real. Every day was the same never a rest I couldn't even sleep some nights.
This was my last week at Karasuno before I was put in the hospital. My mind was too far gone to stay out I couldn't really hear anything anymore to distracted by the music and of course I hummed it on occasion. Everyone in my classes knew I had it...Musicalia but they didn't know who caused it.
Monday
I walked to class with a sigh Yamaguchi was following and as we walked I heard a gentle piano melody that got louder. I spotted a familiar H/c haired girl fast walking past me like she'd done since I pushed her away. Yamaguchi followed my eyesight and the music faded the further away she got "you should apologize you know. This week is her last at Karasuno," I blinked 'her last week?' I thought "Shut up Yamaguchi," I said keeping my emotions off my face "Sorry Tsukki," I continued watching the S/c skinned female rush off down the hall.
Tuesday
I was walking up to the roof ready to reject another girl. Why they felt the need to confess to me of all people id never understand. As I rounded the corner someone ran into me and with a short shriek they fell. I was about to say something when I noticed who it was...Y/n she looked paler than I remembered and eye bags were prevalent on her face. I heard the piano again it was louder than ever.
"Do you need to listen to music that loud?" I asked though it was harsher than intended. Her eyes widened and I held back a frown as I saw she was afraid. "S-sorry," she stood up quickly and ran off down the hall the music fading the further she got and I watched 'why was she afraid of me?' My eyes caught something on the floor which I turned to. Picking it up I realized it was a simple gold bracelet with a dinosaur charm on it.
"This is...," It was the bracelet id given her three years ago on her birthday. It was still in perfect condition looking like it did on the day I'd given it to her and it caused a small smile to pull at my lips as I pocketed the familiar bracelet.
Wednesday
Everytime I spotted the e/c eyed female in the hallway and approached her she would turn and run the music following her. Nobody ever seemed bothered by the piano it was almost like they didn't hear it and Y/n was never wearing headphones when it was playing. "Does she ever stop listening to that song?" I mumbled to myself as she ran away yet again.
"What song?" Yamaguchi asked next to me I furrowed my eyebrows as I looked at him. "What do you mean what song? That damn piano music she's always listening to it's annoying," I said and Yamaguchi’s eyes widened "Tsukki...She's not listening to any music...," He stated.
I blinked as I processed what that meant "No ive heard it-," Yamaguchi cut me off before I could continue he had a sad look in his eyes and as he spoke I realized why. "She's got Musicalia Tsukki...," He whispered as he looked at me. "She...She what?" I asked. "She's got Musicalia and if you can hear it that means...," my own eyes widened as I realized what he was implying. "Oh...,"
Thursday
Cornering someone who was avoiding you was much more difficult than you'd think. Everytime I ended up even in the same room as her she ran before I could even get near her. "Yamaguchi," I stated causing him to jump. "Yeah?" He nervously asked. "Can you convince Y/n to meet you on the roof?" I asked. He didn't ask any questions he just nodded mumbling a quiet yeah as the teacher walked in the room.
I stood on the roof looking out towards the gym. I heard footsteps come around the corner and stop before they slowly started backing away. "Can you stop running? I need to talk to you," I said. The footsteps stopped and I turned around. Y/n stood a few feet away nervously shuffling on her feet.
"When were you gonna tell me?" I asked and she sighed "Preferably never," She answered and I furrowed my eyebrows. "Never? This could kill you!" I took a step toward her while she took one back "So what?" She spit bitterly rasing her head up to glare. "So what? So everything!" I shouted.
"So everything? You dont even fucking like me! You made that pretty clear last year!" She yelled back. She was referencing an argument that I barely remembered and that she hadn't forgotten. "Do you even know what its like to have your heart crushed in seconds!?" She screamed. "You still should have told me you have Musicalia!" I glared back. 
She just gave me a bitter smile "I suppose my dear this was how it was meant to be," she stretched her arms out as she spoke and tears dripped down her face at a slow pace. "You dying isn't how it's supposed to be!" She only shook her head in response. I stuck my hand in my pocket and pulled out the bracelet. "Here...just take this back," I said holding it out. She walked forward and I heard that gentle and haunting music get louder.
She stopped closing my hand around the bracelet and leaning up to press a kiss against my cheek. "Keep it I won't have a use for it much longer," she mumbled before turning and walking off. "Y/n!" She stopped but didn't turn around and I continued speaking. "I love you," she sighed and turned her head. The sunset cast her in an ethereal glow and sparkled off the remaining tears on her face.
She gave a sad, watery smile in response. "No you don't Tsukki. If you did...You would have come back to me a lot sooner," she turned and left I knew she was right but god it hurt to hear her say that. My hand was still tightly closed around the bracelet the metal uncomfortably warm against my skin as she walked away from me.
Friday
She avoided me even more. I never saw her but I heard the music following around on occasion. After yesterday I had looked for the melody finally hearing it long enough to search for it. The results had told me the song was Clair De Lune I should have known. It was Y/n's favorite song though I doubted she liked it now.
I had tried to find her when I heard the music but even if I followed it I never found her. I was walking toward my locker keeping an ear out for that melody. As I opened the locker a f/c envelope fell out as I picked it up I noticed it was sealed with a gold wax stamp. Flipping it over my name was written on the front in flowing cursive. I put it away in my bag before heading to practice.
I flipped the envelope around in my hand staring at it before sighing. I pulled open the envelope and slipped the contents out. The first was a photo of me, Y/n, and Yamaguchi we were standing in the park in the photo. Y/n and Yamaguchi had their arms over eachothers shoulders while I stood in the background glaring towards the camera.
The other thing was a letter that I was hesitant to flip open. I knew the letter was from Y/n but I for the first time felt afraid on what she had to say. Sighing I opened the letter ready to read it.
Dear Kei,
It's been awhile hasn't it? Though That's what happens after fights. You give each other time to calm down and then you come back. Only this time...There is no coming back. You already know I have Musicalia and I'm sure you know I love you. It's weird to write that to someone you know doesn't love you.
Don't lie either. You don't love me the way I love you. You may think you do but if you had we would have been friends again by now. But you were perfectly content with not having me in your life so I know you'll be fine when I'm actually gone.
That's the issue isn't it? I'll be gone soon really, truly...gone. I'm not afraid knowing my death is approaching im...content and at peace with it. My death won't be glorious. I'm not going out with a bang. Or any final inspirational words. I'll go quietly in my sleep hopefully. Sleep however is hard when there's music constantly playing on loop in your head.
When I'm gone Kei...Will you visit me? Tell me about your day or the volleyball team! Yamaguchi told me about the team you should go easier on them. You should also learn from them you know? Anyways if you ever can't make it to me...Play Clair De Lune and I'll go to you! I'll listen to you talk at your place instead of you coming to mine!
I'm sure you know by now that this is my goodbye letter. Don't act so suprised of course I want to say goodbye to you. You're important to me you should know that. I've written this for awhile but I wanted it to be a good final goodbye since its immortalized forever in a letter. If you share this with anyone I'll kill you by the way. Even in death I still have a reputation. Anyway...
Goodbye Kei
I love you
—Y/n L/n
A month had passed since she said goodbye I moved forward even though it hurt to not see her around school. It almost felt like she moved but that imagine was ruined whenever I visited her grave. "Hey Tsukki I didn't know you liked dinosaurs!" I sighed in irritation my eyes flicking towards Kuroo who was pointing at my wrist.
"Wow that's cool!" Bokuto joined in and my eyes drifted to the golden bracelet around my wrist. "It's not mine," I stated drinking my water. "Whos is it?" Akaashi asked and I sighed again. "My friend Y/n’s...She's gone now and I'd rather not talk about it," I said standing up and heading back to the net. None of them said anything more about it and I was grateful for that.
Later that night I closed my eyes and played the song that I had grown very familiar with. It was quiet except for the soft melody playing through my headphones. While my eyes were closed I felt the familiar pressure on my body like someone was laying on my chest. If I listened through my headphones close enough I could almost hear her soft voice humming the song. 
I knew in my brain it was impossible but for now I let my heart believe that it was her. I talked quietly about anything and everything that came to mind. The team was sleeping so I knew I could talk freely most of them slept like they were in a coma. I sighed as I reached the end of my story before I spoke once more.
"I miss you Y/n,"
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TAGLIST: @wonhomarshmallow
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goldenncherrybombb · 4 years
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To Be So Lonely
The one where Harry gets lonely in Japan.
Need to catch up?
Masterlist 
Warning: The tiniest amount of smut, and cursing 
Word count: 4.5k 
This isn’t edited so im sorry for any mistakes :p
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Harry has been in Japan for two weeks now. He didn’t intend to stay for two weeks, and more. But he doesn’t plan on leaving japan anytime soon. He decided that halfway through the first week. 
Everyday he gets up around eight, goes to the cafe down the street and gets his usual, looking at the vinyls while waiting for his order. Once done he sits in his usual spot, pulling out a book and reading while eating, or writing in his journal. Then he walks around, going to different markets. 
He’s found himself in the studio a few times as well, and he hangs out with friends as much as possible, creating new ones on the way. 
But he still feels lonely. 
He’s around his friends majority of the afternoon and into the night, then he comes back to his temporary residence and goes to bed lonely. No one to talk to about his day out, the things he saw, the new ideas for songs, and no one for him to experience his trip with him c
He often finds himself daydreaming about y/n. When he goes out and finds romantic spots he wonders if she would like it, or when he tries anything new he wonders if she would try it. He’ll find jewelry he thinks would look amazing for her. He even picked up a little ring for her. 
 He just misses her. 
But he’s been ignoring her. He didn’t tell her he had left the country. He only told his mum and Jeff. He’s not sure why he didn’t tell her. It’s supposed to go back to how it was right? 
Wrong 
The feelings are still there, hell, Harry even thinks they are deeper now. He still loves her with all his heart. He has no resentment for her because she was the one who broke it off. He knows why she did it. For him, and for her. 
He may have been gone from the house more often that not, but he saw the sadness in her face. She didn’t sleep with a calm face anymore, with her mouth slightly open, and no creases in her forehead. Now she slept with a frown on her face and her forehead creased, looking upset in her sleep even. 
He was hurting her and it hurt him even more to know that. 
She’s his everything. Yet he was the one person dragging her down. Making her sad, and making her question her worth. 
He couldn’t do it anymore. He doesn’t want to ignore her anymore to try and get rid of his feelings for her, he can’t. He physically can’t. He will always love her. No matter what. He’s not whole without her. 
He just hopes she feels the same. 
“Harry?” She questions, her voice sounding croaky. 
“‘Lo love.” He’s scared of what she might say. Is she mad at him for not answering her messages and calls? Should he tell her why he did that? She he just tell her how he feels? It would be easier on the phone, but he feels like it’s not the right way to go about things. 
“I thought you fell off the face of the earth you dickhead!” She exclaims loudly with a small laugh coming from her.  He feels better at the sounds of her laugh, his worries lessened as he smiles and almost laughs with her. 
“Sorry, I just-“ he pauses, the playful mood gone by the low adverb of his voice. “I just thought it was better fo’yeh, t’give ya space. I know yeh said you needed to break it off because I needed to get better first, but I know I hurt you too. An’ ‘m so fuckin’ sorry.” His voice becomes brittle as he lets his emotions loose. 
“Harry,” she cuts in when she notices the sound of his voice. She knows his eyes are watery, his head is tossed back, staring up, trying not to cry. “There is no need to apologize. I get it. But yes, you did hurt me. But it wasn’t because of that. It’s not that you hurt me, it just hurt watching you change into someone I didn’t know, someone I didn’t want to be around because it resulted in arguing. You were-are my everything, H.” It goes silent between the two for a moment, Harry thinking about her words and letting them soak in. “Listen H, I know I also hurt you by leaving you and I need to apologize for that. I just-“ she gets cut off by a voice Harry can’t make out in the background. He faintly hears other people in the background and he wonders where she is. “I gotta go, but I’ll call you later. Hope your having fun in Japan, bub. Always knew you wanted to visit there again.” He smiles and stands from his bed, but is still wondering what else she wanted to say. 
“I’ll see you when I get back, i miss yeh and our movie nights.” She smiles as he speaks, and reminisces on some of their movie nights. “Wish yeh were here with me. I know you would love it.” He looks out the window and looks down at the bustling streets of Japan. 
“I miss you too. But I’m sure I would. Make sure to send me some photos you have took so far.” Her words send Harry into a realization. 
He hasn’t taken any photos 
“I would send yeh some, if I took any.” He heard her gasp on the other line. Already knowing she is gonna scold him for not taking photos. She took photos anywhere they went. She didn’t take an overload, just enough to capture their favorite moments for them to look back on. 
“Harry! How have you not taken any? Oh wait, I’m sorry H, I really have to go now. Bye, love you!” The line goes dead and he ponders over her last sentence for a minute before blinking out of his trance. Did she mean it in a friendly way? Or did she mean it in the way he dreams about? 
He shakes the thoughts away and sets his phone on his bed. When he stands back up to full height he stretches and yawns before crawling back into bed. 
***
Harry was writing on his bed with his guitar in his lap when he heard three delicate knocks on his door. His head raised in curiosity when the first knock sounded, his pen stopping on the paper. His hair was tied with a scrunchie in his hair. A black cardigan covering his white shirt, grey sweatpants on his lower half. 
He shuffled to the door before he unlocked it and opened it a sliver since his door didn’t have a peep hole. His eyes went wide and his mouth dropped in surprise. 
“Hi.” He opens the door all the way and lets the surprise guest in. “Ok so before you start asking me questions or potentially yelling at me for ruining a solo trip. I have to explain. I found out where you were from Jeff because I went to your house and you weren’t there and I was worried because all your cars were in the garage,” she takes a breath, her words coming out fast and jumbled, “but anyways, then he started telling me some things that you had been saying I just knew I had to come see you because I felt the same way and I just, I felt like I needed to see you, and now that I’m here I feel whole again and-and I love you.” Her eyes go wide and her hand covers her mouth. “Oh my god, I wasn’t supposed to say all of that. I was supposed to tell you later and now I probably-“ Harry walks up to her quickly and stops her rambling by kissing her. Both of them melt into the kiss, and his hand rest are on her back as she arches into him. 
Their lips melt into each other’s with no movements. Just letting the feeling of their lips meeting again being enough for them. Reluctantly, Harry pulls back slowly but remains close to her. His forehead rests on hers lightly, their noses bump, and their lips brush lightly. 
“I love you too.” He pulls his head back and moves his hands down further and grab under her thighs, hoisting her up so her legs wrap around her waist and her arms go around his neck as she giggles. “An’ I’ve missed yeh so damn much and love you too damn much to ever be mad at yeh fo’crashing m’trip. ‘M actually happy yer here. Could never be mad at ya, unless ya leave yeh shoes in front of the door for me to trip on.” She throws her head back with a groan and rolls her eyes before looking back at him. 
“It was one,” he narrows his eyes at her and she bites back a smile. “Ok three times! But to be fair I had just come back from the studio and was too tired to go upstairs so I kicked off my shoes and crashed on the couch. You know how exhausting the studio is!” 
“I could’ve tripped and hit m’head on the table!” His dramatics make her laugh, throwing her head back at the memory of the third time it happened. 
***
Her and Harry had just come back home from the bar. Their hands were all over each other as soon as they got in the car. Once they got home Harry made sure to tip the Uber driver before rushing into the house with a giggling y/n holding his hand, laughing at how eager he was. 
They both had a good amount to drink, but they weren’t drunk. Harry had a little more than y/n so he stumbled a bit more in his steps, and his words were a tad bit more slurred than hers.
“Bloody key! Can’t get it in the fuckin’ hole!” He grumbles as he shoves the key in the key hole. Y/n giggles beside him and she seems a smile twitching on his lips before they both break out laughing when she says ‘that’s what she said.’ 
Once the key is finally in and the door is unlocked her laughter stops when his arm goes around her waist to pull her in as his lips crash against hers. 
Harry’s downfall is that he is walking backwards and he is as clumsy as a one year old, and he is a little drunk. So when he barley trips over one of y/n’s vans it sends him falling to the ground, a squeal being let out of her mouth as he crashes on the entryway floor. Luckily y/n acted fast enough and moved her hands from his hair to the back of his head to soften the blow. 
“Fuck.” They both say at the same time, making them chuckle. She feels around his head to make sure he didn’t hit it on anything and is bleeding. 
“You ok, H?” She questions softly, he smiles as he scans over her, making sure she didn’t somehow get hurt. 
“‘M ok, how bout you, pet?” She shrugs her shoulders and presses a kiss to his jaw. 
“I’m ok, a little hungry though.” He chuckles before rolling her over so she is underneath him. 
“Who needs a bed anyways?” He questions while slipping her pants off. She rolls her eyes playfully and pulls his head down so their lips crash back together. 
***
Once Harry got y/n’s bag in the room after letting her down, he found her looking at the view from his window. 
“Pretty, innit?” He questions, coming up behind her and wrapping his arms around her stomach, his chin resting on her shoulder. She hums as he lays a kiss on her neck. He leaves a trail of open mouthed kisses up to her jaw before sucking on her smooth skin to leave a mark. Her hand goes to his hair and she moves her neck to give him more access. “Let me show you how much I missed you.” She nods her head and his hand trails down to her pants, unbuckling the few buttons. His fingers trace above her underwear before he goes lower and feels the patch of arousal on her underwear. 
“S’ this all fo’ me, hmm princess?” She whimpers at his words and tugs on his hair more when he leaves another mark on her. 
“Missed you so much.” She breathes out when he finally gives her what she wants. She moans when his fingers hit her spot. 
“Missed you too,” he pulls his fingers out and spins her around with his arm that was still on her waist. “S’much.” 
The rest of the night is spent underneath the sheets. They talk about everything, from how writing is going for both of them, what Harry has done in Japan, etc.  She laid on his chest and traced his butterfly tattoo, listening to the calming beats of his heart and the lull of his voice. He was tracing up and down her bare spine, finding it calming as she spoke. 
They both missed moments like this so much. Moments of pure bliss. Where it feels like it’s just the two of them in the world and time has frozen. The sound of the busy Tokyo streets below disappear as they listen to each other talk and his heartbeat rings in her ear. She swears she’s never felt so content and happy, and she swears her heart is so full it could burst. 
He feels the same way as he ponders when it goes quiet and her breathing evens out, the jet lag getting to her. He thinks about words that could describe how he feels, or just love in general. But he realizes love is indescribable. 
No matter how hard you try, how many words there are in the dictionary, none of them seem to do how it feels to be in love justice. 
So when Harry feels his eyes start to droop he carefully lays down more, kissing the top of her head that’s in the crook of his neck. He studies her face and he falls in love with her more just looking at her. The way her eyelashes are rested delicately on her cheeks. The freckles that are scattered across the bridge of her nose and the top of her cheeks. If someone would let him he would talk for hours about every little thing he loves about her. 
“I couldn't love you more than I do right now, and yet I know I will tomorrow.” He whispers against her hair, leaving one final kiss before shutting off the lamp and closing his eyes. 
***
Harry wakes the next morning to kisses being peppered all over his face. His eyes blink open slowly and y/n smiles at the adorable pout his laps have formed into. 
“Good morning sleepy head.” She smiles at him, straddling his hips. He notices she has clothes on now, underwear and one of his tee shirts. 
“Morning.” He replies, his voice lower and raspier from sleeping. He yawns while rubbing his eyes and y/n smiles at him. She runs her fingers through his growing and messy hair. “What do ya want t’do today, love?” He questions, his arms wrapping around her back when she lays on his chest, and his chin resting on top of her head. 
“Whatever you want. I don’t really know my way around her so maybe you can show me some cool spots?” Her voice is soft when she speaks as she looks out the window to the bustling city below. “I have to shower first though. Don’t want to smell.” 
“You already do, petal.” He tries to hold back his laughs but he snickers when she tells him to fuck off. His hands travel lower to her bottom and he gropes her bum a few times. “We could always take a shower together? Save water an’ allat.” 
“Mmhmm, gotta help the planet right.” He smirks and slaps her bum before moving to get up. 
After they both got ready for the day, Harry putting on a white shirt and white trousers with a green cardigan, they left the hotel and started exploring. Harry took her to his usual places, her favorite being the cafe. She fell in love with the walls filled with vinyls and she loved the food and drinks there more. Her and Harry ended up writing for an hour or two in the small cafe before leaving. 
After they left Harry took her to the place he had been recording music. He was booked in for a few hours and she didn’t mind sitting and watching. She loved going to the studios and he loved when she came with him. She gave him good input and helped him figure out lyrics and runs. 
But how is he supposed to tell her his whole album is about her? 
It’s about 75% done, once he gets back to LA he should almost be done before he goes back to London. 
She made sure to take some pictures of him for memories. Her mom always made her take many photos as a kid that she hated taking, but she loves looking back on them. She has about four photo books filled with pictures from her whole life. Harry often likes to whip out the baby book when his friends come over so he can show him. Saying ‘look how she cute is,’ and before they go to bed he tells her his dreams of having a few kids with her and getting married. She often daydreams of those days. 
Daydreams about how it would feel walking down the aisle and seeing Harry at the end, watching and waiting for her before they finally tie the knot. She wonders what their kids would look like, probably getting Harry’s eyes with a hint of hers in them, hoping they get his curly brown hair. Would they want to sing too? Or would they rather play a sport, paint, or even be the next president? 
“Love?” She snaps out of her trance and looks up from her phone to see Harry smiling down at her. “Watcha thinkin’ about?” He questions, squatting down and resting his arms on her legs. 
“You.” She smiles as a light blush forms on her face and Harry chuckles at her, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Did you finish?” She questions, and Harry nods.
“Yeah actually, just had to do some background vocals.” She smiles brightly at him and clasps her hands in front of her chest in excitement. 
“I’m so excited to hear it! I already know it’s gonna be great! But I think I might wait to hear it, so don’t show me it yet!” He chuckles at her and shakes his head, helping her stand.
“Whatever yeh say doll.” He takes her around a few more places. She meets his friends and they all quickly get to know each other, y/n getting on with them well. They make dinner plans and Harry takes y/n to a bike rental shop so he can show her more before they have dinner. 
They ride bikes around, the cool breeze cools them off as they go down a hill and y/n sticks her feet out, laughing at how fast she is going.
“Look H,” she cheers, getting closer to him. He turns his head and smiles as he shakes her head at her. “slow poke.” She sticks her tongue out at him playfully and he scoffs, speeding up some before sticking his legs out. But he wobbles a little bit so he quickly sticks his feet back on the petal and she laughs at him making him shake his head.
“”S not funny.” He tells her while laughing at himself because of her.
“It’s so funny H, that’s why you are laughing too!” He rolls his eyes and walks up to her after they put their bikes on the rack. His arms wrap around her and she moves hers to go around his neck and she messes with his curls. He pouts at her and she tries to stop her laughs, shaking her head. “You’re right, “s not funny. But it is funny that you have the balance and are as clumsy as a one year old.”
The evening finishes and they say their goodbyes to the group before walking back to the hotel. Their hands are intertwined and they sway them back and forth as they walk. She points out some things here and there, and she tells Harry about some new music when he asks. 
When they get back to the hotel y/n crashes on the bed as soon as she gets in, letting out a groan. 
“H,” Harry hums and looks up at her for a second as he takes his shoes off. “I love you.” He smiles to himself and walks over to her, taking her shoes off for her. 
“I love you too, s’much.” He massages her feet making her groan in satisfaction. “Are you too tired for a bath?” He questions making her head pop up. 
“‘M never too tired for a bath! That sounds so nice right now, this jet lag is still kicking my butt.” She sits up and presses a kiss to his lips when she sees him pucker them. 
“I’ll go start it, I even have bubble bath soap that smells like vanilla, isn’t that cool?!” He gets excited when he tells her about the soap, and she smiles at his excitement. 
Once the bath is done and the bottle of wine is open they get into the tub. She gets in in front of him so her back is resting against her chest. The bubbles are almost spilling out but when she looks at Harry she seems him smiling against his wine glass as he picks up some bubbles. 
“Harry?” She questions after a few minutes of silence, the only thing being heard is music coming from Harry’s phone. “I wasn’t dating anyone when we were on a break. I didn’t do anything with anyone. And I-I know your thought I was dating Austin. But he’s just my producer. I couldn’t do that to you, and plus, he’s not into girls anyways.” Harry feels better at her words, but he is still confused why she brought it up. She nervously fiddles with his fingers since his rings aren’t on. “I also couldn’t to myself, because the only person I want is you. It's always been you, H. And I know that we weren’t together for a few months, but my feelings never changed, and I still love you as much and more as I did the first time I met you.” She turns around after putting her wine glass down on the side of the tub, his hands go to her hips as she moves to straddle him. She messes with his necklace before he puts his thumb under her chin to make her look at him. 
“‘M sorry I was such a dick to yeh about him. I let my jealousy get to me. So ‘m sorry for being a prick. But my feelings never changed either love. You’re it for me, y/n. You’re m’ best friend, m’lover, and you are insanely talented,” He presses a kiss to her lips, “an’ smart,” another kiss, “an beautiful,” another one, “you are compassionate, you are witty, and sarcastic, and so much more to me. You are my world, pet.” She blinks her tears away and awwes.
“That was incredibly cheesy but so sweet, H.” She chuckles, Harry wiping a stray tear from her cheek. He moves his arms around her back to pull her in closer, but before he kisses her they both whisper “I love you” at the same time making them breathlessly laugh. “We always do that.” He hums in agreement before finally pressing his lips to hers. When he pulls back he looks at her with a nervous gaze.
“Do you still think about our future a lot?” He questions quietly while scanning her face.
“All the time, why?” He smiles at her answer and shrugs.
“Cuz I do the same. Can’t wait to put a ring on your pretty finger, then see you walk down the aisle, then call you Mrs.Styles,if that’s what you want, and our honeymoon will be wherever you want. Then maybe a year later we can start trying for kids so I can have mini you’s running around the house.” He has a smile on his lips when he talks, envisioning his future with his love.
“We have to get a dog too, and maybe even a cat. I would take your last name, it is quite a cool name.” Harry chuckles and kisses her cheek before saying her name and his last one, saying it has quite a ring to it.’ She agrees then continues their conversation. 
“We could move to Manchester or London even, I think I would like to settle down there. Be closer to your mom, and I’ve always loved London ever since I was little I wanted to live there.” Harry is surprised by her words. 
“You would really want to settle down in London?” He questions, just to make sure, and she nods. “What about your parents? Or your friends in California?” He knows how hard it is to move away from all of his family and friends, and he knows she had to move away from her parents for her music career, but they only lived a few states away. Not on a whole other continent. 
“My mom has been talking bout moving to London actually. She’s always wanted to live there . It’s one of the main reasons I started to love London. Plus, it’s not like we won’t be there often or I don’t have a house in Malibu, and you have yours. I could sell mine and that’d be the end of that. I’ll still see my friends there. But I also have friends in London.” She's confident in her words, sounding like she has thought about it a few times and that makes Harry smile. 
“It’s up to you, love. I’ll be happy wherever.” She smiles at him and then she suddenly remembers something.
“Let me show you the pictures!” She says excitedly,reaching for her phone. She unlocks it and they look through the photos picking their favorite ones and Harry is happy she captured these moments and now he wants to take more photos, but he would never tell her that.
Once the water went cold and they had gone to bed they repeated what they did the next day, and both of them decided to stay for two more weeks, not wanting to leave what bubble they are in. 
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daddy-daichis · 3 years
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Yesterday the very beautiful and talented @fuwari-s tagged me in this game and since that post is already really long i figured id make a new one lol  (Also thank you for tagging me, it made me so happy)
The Game: Tag your 2D lovers + the other trend I saw yesterday and wanted to do which is Would you actually date them IRL. So ill put that under the cut because it is a lot.
HQ: Atsumu, Daichi, Issei, Bokuto, Hinata, and Kyoutani
BNHA: Bakugou, Denki, and Hawks
JJK: Sukuna and Mei Mei
Others: Kagami from KNB, Levi and Jean from AOT, and Mikoto Suoh from K
So if you want to know if i would date them irl that is below the cut lol
As for tagging... if you want to do it :) @eijirosriot @bokutosnumberonefan @hinosreis @tetsus-kitten @sugawarakoushihoe @mynameisjackattack and anyone else who wants to do one or both of these challenges.
Alright so would i date these men (+ mei mei) in real life. Short answer is yes lmao. Long answer, with some headcanons that may or may not  venture into 18+ category but only slightly. all aged up to be my age which is 26.
Atsumu - PLEASE, YES
we would be so chaotic together but he would also be really loving. As long as he can still prioritize me in a relationship, not over volleyball, just as much, then we will be golden. We would have such a good time and i feel like we would have a lot of fun bickering, which i really enjoy. Play fighting as a form of foreplay, if you will lmao. We’d probs be friends in HS and then get together after he starts playing for MSBY and he is secured in his position (and himself tbh). I just love this cocky bastard. he also gives me switch vibes and as a switch, i love that for me.
Daichi - YES
All i need is to be wrapped in his arms on the daily and i would be happy. Man would know how to take care of me and that is all. Love of my life, too good for this world. Wholesome husband. He would be able to manage my crazy side and chill me out when i get to anxious. I would want to be bratty just to get him to drop his good guy routine sometimes and I feel like he would like that.
Issei - YES
Funeral home employee can get it. Matsukawa Horse cock Issei can whisk me off my feet and straight into bed. we would have a lot of fun picking on oikawa together (out of love of course) but we would balance each other out a lot. His darker humor would go well against my lighter humor. Also I feel like our level of hotness is pretty comparable... like we aren't the prettiest in the friend group but still good (if that makes sense)
Bokuto - YES
Big ball of sunshine to light up my day, he would literally fuck the sad out of me every day I just know it. Like atsumu, as long as I am a priority to him itll work out. We also kind of have the same sad moods so I feel like we could either both just curl up on the couch together and watch a movie or bring the other out of a funk easily. I love this giant himbo so much.
Hinata - most likely yes
Pretty much the same reasons as bokuto but I feel like I would get drained of his energy faster, so he would def have to cuddle me more. For everyone else so far I can imagine being high school sweethearts, but with hinata i think he wouldnt settle down until later, or even start dating so it would probably be a lot of pining and watching him from the side lines for a while, which would be really hard tbh. but the way he would smile at me after a match would make it worth it so...
 Kyoutani - Hard YES
I love a boy with anger issues, what can i say... (cough couch my irl husband with anger issues couch couch) I would love to be his weak spot and the one person he would go to to help him not feel angry anymore. I think that my fun personality would help him to unbox himself a bit. I just want to give him cuddles and a place to feel accepted. id also i KNOW hes a monster in bed... 
Bakugou - FUCKING HARD YES, PLEASE
if he was real the things i would do to and for him... A lot like kyoutani i would want to give him a place where hes accepted, and a place where he is unconditionally loved. I would be able to handle his misguided anger and calm him down and give him space. I headcanon that hes very cuddly in private to just his S/O which is something that i love. I love his lil smirk and would do anything to get him to smirk at me. As long as he is able to set me as a priority it would work out, but that would be what he struggles with so it would be a thing we would have to talk about. But I also feel that once you say something about it he would check in with you because of course he has to be the best bf/husband. I feel like I could talk for hours about him so Ill just wrap it up by saying that I love me a passionate man who would probs be a lil possessive, and I would use that to my advantage. 
Denki - GOD YES
I really do think that denki and I are soulmates. we are both the perfect blend of funny, pervy, while still being soft. I feel like there would be a lot of mutual pining at first but he would end up the golden retriever gamer boy to my alt bisexual and thats just the perfect pairing. We would pull so much shit and then get away with it because thats just us being us. I see us being scolded by bakugou a lot for the stupid shit we would pull. Also late night drives in his shitty tuned car to taco bell while we sing alt rock songs from the 2010s. also the switch vibes are immaculate.
 Hawks - Probably
So it would honestly depend a lot on what version of hawks.. him in the hero commission is a no, because he wouldnt be able to be honest with me about a lot of stuff. Like his name, or when i can see him again, and that would give me too much anxiety. When hes free of them and is actually allowed to be himself I think it could work then. I know that he of course wants to still be the best hero, so he would have the same problems as bakugou with finding a balance, but if he wants to i think he could. He would also have a lot of trauma from his relationship with his parents and the commission so I dont know if he would be able to give his love away as freely as he wants so we could get therapy together. I love that for us. But i would happily wake up next to this beautiful birb man if he would have me.  
Sukuna - A hesitant yes
so.. the anger issues that ive mentioned before.. yes. I would like sukuna. I would be his lil bride and sit on his lap on his throne as long as he didnt kill my loved ones or my cats lmao. I would also be ok with being his and itadoris gf while hes living in itadoris head. being with him is just asking for an unhappy ending tho, whether its a life always on the run, or someones trying to kill me, or someones trying to kill him, or hes trying to kill someone. But yes i would like to be with him but that would mean sacrificing a lot. 
Mei Mei - god yessssss..
Please Mei Mei step on me and make me ur lil house wife. I see us living in a pent house apartment with the most breathtaking view of the Tokyo skyline. I would want for nothing and she could take me where ever she wanted and i would just follow her around with heart eyes.
 Kagami - YES
my basketball husband! i love him and would love to be loved by him. Id follow him wherever. He would take care of me and is just so dreamy.. also i guess the mild anger issues.. but hes really not that bad. He would just be such a good s/o. He would cook us nice dinners, wed have a few cats, and he would carry me around a lot because hes so strong. While were on the topic of strong... his stamina... everyone on this list probably has good if not great stamina... but kagami just hits different..... have you seen him in the zone? have you seen his thighs? his sex zone has got to be incredible. 
 Levi - Yes
I was going to say it depends, but really it doesn't... if were in the aot universe and hes my captain and I fall in love with him u can bet ur ass im gonna try and get with him because i could die at anytime. if its some au where he is here in our universe and somehow we meet... like of course im gonna be in love with him. our height difference isnt too bad, im only like an inch or 2 taller than him. I think we would both have a great time together. I would make him laugh, and he would help me clean, because lord knows I hate cleaning. BUT i hate cleaning because its something that I always have to do alone, and I feel like levi would have us be cleaning together like he makes the scouts do. and hes just so sexy... 
Jean - big yes
This beautiful handsome man... idk what to even say about him. Hes strong, funny, handsome, cocky, but very much full of love. would love to run away from the world with him. I feel like if he was in love with me before *tries not to give away spoilers* the marco incident (?) that after he would become very clingy and attached and im ok with that. There would have to be lots of cuddles and reassurances and i just want to see him happy and not at war, with both real life people and himself... id give him the best kisses and he would become addicted to them. 
Mikoto - No? But maybe...
I feel like we could be.. but if you watched the show then you know.. But i would love to be Homra’s princess TBH. No one would mess with me or they would have to face the wrath of my big fire boyfriend and his whole ass gang. But on the other hand I feel like Mikoto wouldnt allow himself to fall in love, so it would probably be a hush hush topic. everyone knows the boss and I are in an entanglement, but they cant talk about it. Then Anna starts asking questions to Mikoto and he has to come clean to her, which would be so cute. He tells her is a secret but she doesn't care lmao. in conclusion, I would want to, but I dont think he would let me.... Maybe friends with benefits tho....
............................................................................................
ok if you read all this im officially in love with you. Please take my heart. 
This took me like 2 hours to do because I love thinking about it so much. if you have any thoughts about any of this hop into my dms or comment on this because id love to hear them (especially if you think i belong with one more than the others lmao). 
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deliberatelyvague · 4 years
Text
Spotlight (Asmodeus x fem!reader)
Started: April 5, 2020 at 7:42pm
Ended: April 5, 2020 at 8:50pm
Word Count: 2,030
Shipping: [Asmodeus x fem!reader]
Trigger Warning: cutting, eating disorder, (notes of) depression
Author’s Note: Uhh so here’s another one. I enjoy writing stories, so please, continue requesting!
Prompt/Request: OK SO IDK WHICH ONE I WANT TO REQUEST SO IM DOING BOTH. Can I request a mc x asmo scenario where mc is a super duper popular idol but it’s later revealed that in order to keep her beauty she develop an eating disorder and started to develop depression resulting in cutting her self?? Sorry for the weird ask!!
—————
You had always heard the saying ‘beauty is pain’. You didn’t realize how much pain it was, however, until you got down to the Devildom. Of course, you weren’t totally off Scott-free, your fans still expected some content, and you were in no place to deny them that.
Now, you loved the majority of your fans. They always backed you up, defended you and the link, but there was just somethings they couldn’t defend you from. Including yourself, unfortunately.
Getting famous started moderately fine, you went viral because of your singing videos, and you guess some modeling businesses enjoyed your looks and attitude enough that they asked if you could do some shoots. From then on, it was a whirlwind of sessions, meet and greets, starving yourself and self harming.
That last part was relatively new, and it was caused by some hate that you had received. Well, hate was to put it in modern terms. A tabloid had started rumors that you had gained weight, which wasn’t wrong (you were still growing and maturing, your body weight is going to fluctuate), but they stretched it beyond what it was and paired it with some terrible pictures taken with your guard down. It all mixed to create a terrible atmosphere, especially when other tabloids started to gossip about your weight as well.
Eventually it seemed that your weight was the only thing important. So, you started to cut down on food. You started to take walks and workout moderately regularly, and the results were almost instantaneous. You dropped a few pounds a week, your figure slimmed down and you had never felt better. But then, the opposite effect happened with the tabloids, talking about how much weight you had lost, but this time they were praising you. You loved that feeling, it’s why you continued singing and modeling anyway.
People called you beautiful and you thrived off the attention, which is probably why when you went to the Devildom you and Asmodeus hit it off so quickly.
You two were best friends within the first week you were there- and since he had a tendency of going partying after school and hanging out with other friends of his on some days, he never noticed how little you truly ate.
None of the other brother’s noticed, or you figured they didn’t.
But then something happened, you stopped losing weight as quickly as you had been. This sends you into spirals of anxiety, making you cut back more and more, exercise more. But it didn’t work. In fact, one week when you had weighed in, you had gained weight.
As you stared at that number flashing at you, the number that was only a pound above where it had been last week, you started sobbing.
Thoughts piled up in your mind about how you weren’t good enough anymore, about how your fans will leave you, about how Asmodeus would leave you. His friendship meant the world to you, and you would be lying if you told yourself that a friendship was all that you wanted from him.
But he was out partying with demons that were better than you, no doubt, ones that were skinnier, more confident, and yards better than you in everything.
In the back of your mind, you remembered the hater’s comments on some of your most popular songs, telling you about doing things to your body. You remember the tabloids gossiping about self-harm scars on popular actresses' bodies, and you thought about why they would do that. It’s said to be a pleasure source, something that makes the person doing it feel better.
You would do anything to feel actually, genuinely happy, for once, so before you even thought about it you had popped a blade out of the razor in the bathroom and pressed it to your hip. You almost never showed off your stomach, so it wouldn’t be that big of a deal.
You flinched away from the wound almost immediately, the pain coming in tiny spikes. But then, eventually, there was a bit of pleasure coming from it, watching little dots of blood pop up and drip down your hip and fall onto the ground. You cut yourself again, then once more.
You swallowed, breaking out of the trance the red lines had put you in before you realized that you needed to finish your homework. You cleaned up your cuts, sliding on a pair of loose-fitting joggers and a shirt you had taken from Asmodeus and padded over to your desk, sitting in the sodden chair, trying not to bother the cuts more than the pants would already. You quickly finished the homework, well as quickly as you could when every few minutes or so you would move slightly and the cuts would be agitated, and for a few quick moments you considered taking off your pants, but you didn’t know when Asmodeus would make his way to your room and come in without knocking like he usually did.
Though eventually you did change into some sleeping shorts, ones that almost fell off of your body, and that were practically bootie shorts.
“Doll, I’m coming in,” you heard Asmodeus’ voice through the door before he opened it. You were laying on your back on your bed, your head hanging off and your DDD in your hand.
“Asmo!” You called gleefully, his face immediately lightening your mood substantially. “How was the party?”
“It wasn’t as good as the one the other week, you remember that one, right doll? The one I forced you to come to.”
“Oh, yeah that one. I love that the first party you made me go to was also a rave. Go big or go home, right?”
“Of course! Now, Doll, what are we doing tonight? We could watch a movie and eat some unhealthy snacks?”
“Uh, we can watch movies, but I don’t really want to eat anything,” you told him, flipping around on your bed and sitting on your legs. He tilted his head and a frown formed between his two perfectly sculpted eyebrows.
“Oh? But Lucifer told me you didn’t eat tonight, you must be hungry?”
“No, I’m not really,” you assured him, but your stomach decided to betray you in that exact moment almost as if it was saying ‘don’t lie to him I am hungry’.
He looked from your stomach to your face with an unamused look on his face.
“[Y/N], he also told me that he’s never seen you eat, that you don’t eat dinner here at all. You know you don’t have to lie to me, right?”
The honesty in his voice and the look in his eyes almost broke you.
“I know,” he looked concerned, but didn’t push you. You knew you would tell him about your disorder when you were ready, hopefully if he had any idea about your disorder, he knew that too.
The two of you decided to do an at-home spa day, and he took you to his room. The two of you did face masks, hair masks, mani-pedis, and other things like that.
You had chosen each other’s nail colors, and you had picked an orange color to match his eyes, and he picked pink, using a holographic color on your ring figures. You liked that enough you did that on his ring figured too so you both would be matching.
While you waited for your nails to dry and picked out toenail polish, he asked you about any crushes.
“Oh, no, Asmo, I don’t really have my eyes on anyone,” you lied as you looked through the shades of blue he had. His eyes immediately lit up.
“Yes! Yes you do, I knew it! Who is it?” He said excitedly, and you shook your head.
“I knew you wouldn’t believe that. I’m not going to tell you because it’ll never happen, trust me.”
“Doll, how could you say that? I’m sure a lot of people would love to date you, to be able to call you theirs!” You shook your head, scoffing at him.
“Not this guy. I’m pretty sure he had his eyes on someone else, anyway.”
“Is it Lucifer? It does seem like he has his eyes on Diavolo, but I don’t know about that one, Doll. You still might have a chance.”
“No! It’s not Lucifer, I don’t have that big of daddy issues.”
“Who is it? Please, tell me,” he begged, and for the first time you actually looked at him. His eyes showed almost.. sadness. He seemed sad to be thinking about you with someone else.
You just shook your head.
“Asmo,” you let out, leaning back and looking at him. “It’ll ruin this.” He frowned.
“[Y/N], what do you mean?”
“Asmo,” here it comes, you just decided to let it out. “I like you. I really, really like you. But I understand if it weirds you out, if I’m not your type, I-”
You were interrupted when Asmo held the back of your head and brought your lips to his. You melted into his, and he put his hands on your hips and pulled you onto his lap. You let out a yelp when he pulled on you a little too hard, your cuts opening.
“Doll, what’s wrong?” He asks, before looking down at where his hands were, one of his hands having a little spot of blood on them and the shorts being stained with a little amount of blood. “[Y/N], what’s this?” You let his lift your shirt and pull down your shorts slightly, and he let out a small gasp, his face dropping as he took in your figure, one significantly smaller than it had been when you first came, and the multiple cuts you had on you.
“I, it’s just stress. The tabloids, the comment sections of almost anything when I post pictures, it’s all just a lot.”
“Doll, you could have come to me. Here, let’s fix you up a little bit,” he soothed, picking you up and making you wrap your legs around him, carrying you to his bathroom and dressing your wounds. You didn’t say anything to him. “When’s the last time you ate or drank anything?”
“I drank some water earlier today,” you tell him, and he smiles slightly and strokes your hair. “Good job on that, Doll. But we need to get some food in your stomach, okay?”
Your heartbeat sped up, and you shook your head, tears coming.
“No, Asmo, I can’t eat. Please, don’t make me.”
“I’m not asking you to eat much, please, I can’t have my girl dying on me. What about a piece of fruit and some more water?”
You looked at the floor for a few seconds.
“Can we watch something while I eat, and cuddle, please? It’ll help me take my mind off of it, I think.” He nods, and you both walk to the kitchen after fixing your clothes.
Grabbing your food and water you make your way to your room and turn on [TV show or movie] as Asmo sat on the floor, pulling you into his lap, his chest pressed against your back. He kissed underneath your ear.
Once you had finished the food, which took a bit, but it’s still down for now, he praised you.
“Good girl, Doll. Now finish the water and he can cuddle more.”
You finish the water and turn to him.
“Thank you, Asmo. For helping me.”
“Of course, Doll. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
————
This was written by me in no way trying to romanticize mental illnesses. I try to write what I feel would help me in the moment. I completely understand that mental illnesses don’t just ‘disappear’ when you’ve figured out that someone loves you or someone helps you once- that’s why I don’t write what happens after in most cases. If you are struggling, please reach out to anyone you trust, or call a hotline.
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into1-wonderland · 3 years
Text
Baby!Into1 x Daycare au | Intro
(ft. Bo Yuan as the caretaker of the 10 chaotic bunch, ranging from the ages of 3-5)
a/n: hello hello yumi here~ so this is the first into1 au of mine that will ever see the light of day. at first I was going to write things for it, but honestly I'm going to make it into a series with incorrect quotes to attach with it. this post will be the bios of all the babies and our lovely caretaker Bo Yuan, so enough of me babbling and I hope you guys could enjoy~
First off, we have the Caretaker™ Bo Yuan:
my mans is like in his 20's rn
wanted to open up a little day care as like side job/internship because he wanted to teach kids in the future so he was like “might as well start working with kids now!”
and so
he did it
only regretted his life decisions when his devil number 1 and devil number 2 does something bad
other times he really enjoy looking after them! and he doesn’t even feel like it’s a job!
has been thinking about taking a field trip with all 10 of them but he’s afraid: 1) he might lose one 2) he might lose himself 3) can they behave themselves
his favorite thing to do is having all of them gather around while reading a fairytale to them for nap time
or sometimes he would sing a song
he has a lot of favorite things in day care, literally having all 10 of them just there makes him happy
except when lin mo and nine is having a scream off:
lin mo: ahh
nine: aHH
lin mo: AHH
nine: AHHHHH-
bo yuan, running into the room: what’s wrong?
ak: screaming
bo yuan: why?
patrick, with his hands over his ears: TO SEE WHOS LOUDER
all the other boys: *nods*
isnt always watching the kids 24/7, since day 1 when the kids came in he told them the rules of the daycare and kinda just let them familiarize the place
(bo yuan: its a daycare, and they are kids, they are suppose to have fun!
keyu, in the back, mumbles: i wanna climb the tree in the yard
bo yuan, turns around: keyu no)
///////////
And now we have the kids!!
Liu Yu:
4 years old
very quiet, just likes to sit and read and draw
the most obedient one, and likes to follow around bo yuan
well,, most of the time
he’s played a few pranks on bo yuan like:
bo yuan: liu yu nap time is over you have to wake up
liu yu: *not moving*
bo yuan, gently nudged liu yu: liu yu wake up!
liu yu: *continues to fake sleep and not move*
bo yuan: *leans closer to liu yu’s face to make sure hes not sick or has a fever*
liu yu, scares bo yuan: WAH
bo yuan: liu yu dont do that! you scared me!
liu yu: *giggles*
likes to stretch and bend himself in odd positions
(bo yuan: everyday I’m in fear that he will snap himself in half)
kinda an introvert but once he hangs around everyone for a bit he will open up to them and fit himself in very well
likes to organize and keep things how he found them/have special places where he organizes his toys
jiayuan: *moves liu yu’s fan*
liu yu: hey! put that back!!
has really good etiquettes and never really fights or argues or bicker with the other kids
but likes to joke around and mess around with once in a while
patrick: wahhh i put my cupcakes here who took one!
liu yu, hiding it behind his back: idk maybe keyu took it?
the least of bo yuan’s worries since he’s always in bo yuan’s sight, also he’s aware of his surroundings so he actually helps bo yuan make sure everything’s okay
(bo yuan: i made a checklist for myself on the whiteboard and liu yu likes to check things off for me, he said “coloring in the boxes is fun” so now he's the reason why i get all my work done)
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Santa:
4 years old
riki’s best friend
super happy and bright, like a ray of sunshine
is easily scared
lin mo: hi
santa: WAHHHHH BO YUAN GEGE
really likes bo yuan, would stick on to him a lot and ask him about everything
santa: bo yuan gege whats this?
santa: bo yuan gege what’s that?
santa: bo yuan gege what are you making right now?
hangs out with liu yu and mika a lot (other than riki)
riki is older than him but would hold riki’s hand and take him around like a didi
also really likes racing with mika for E V E R Y T H I N G
(bo yuan: yeah couple days ago they tried to race who can fall asleep faster but because they kept on peeking at each other so they basically didn’t sleep till i said i’ll watch for them)
really likes to dance, every time he hears music he would start grooving around
loves learning new things, which is probably the reason why he always asks bo yuan so many questions
also least one of bo yuan’s worries, just gotta make sure jiayuan and lin mo don’t pull pranks on him
(bo yuan: well they dont really pull prank pranks, its just once lin mo grabbed a frog and started running around and showing it to everyone, but lin mo lost grip and the frog jumped on santa)
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Rikimaru:
5 years old
looks like he’s 3, acts like he’s 3, but is actually 5
best friends with santa! always sticks around him and likes to tug on a corner of his shirt out of habit
bo yuan: alright everyone it’s nap time! i’ve made the beds for everyone
riki, sees his bed is not next to santa: bo yuan gege can you switch my bed next to santa? i wanna be next to santa
he didn’t start speaking till he was 4 so he often stutters when he talk and just looks confused a lot (it's because he’s thinking and formulating his words)
santa and the other kids would always have to interpret for him
bo yuan: riki I brought some snacks today do you want cookies or marshmallows?
riki: ???
santa, motioning with his hands: bo yuan gege said do you want the white fluffies or brown crunchies
riki: oh! crunchies!
squishy cheeks,, bo yuan’s favorite thing is to squish his cheek everytime he sees him
riki: gud mooning bo yuan gege!
bo yuan, squishes riki’s cheeks: ahh I haven’t seen you in so long good morning!!
nine: wait wasnt riki here yesterday??
also likes to stretch,, often seen around with liu yu and they just help each other
(bo yuan: i am afraid he will snap himself in half too)
not too much of bo yuan’s worries, besides the fact that he might get kidnapped because he’s so oblivious
(bo yuan: we were playing outside in the yard once and riki just wandered off because he thought the neighbor’s flowers were pretty)
-----------
Mika:
4 years old
also kinda an introvert, doesn’t interact with too many people
usually it’s santa that approaches him first or keyu^^
found a ukulele in the toy bin one time and wouldn’t let go of it (he claims it’s his now)
his favorite activity at daycare is when they all sing together, that’s when he smiles the most and has the most fun
the one that likes to nap the most
also likes to help bo yuan cook once in a while (mostly just having mika washing vegetables and passing things to bo yuan)
very laid back and not noisy (till he starts playing the ukulele)
often gets scared by lin mo’s sudden screams (actually, lin mo scares a lot of people, sorry to mika’s ears)
also not one of bo yuan’s worries, literally there’s nothing to worry about with mika, all the kids just likes to sit around mika and pet his head so he keeps everyone safe
(bo yuan: one time I couldn’t find any of the kids in the play room, apparently they were all in the napping corner petting mika’s head since he just got a hair cut)
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Nine:
4 years old
loud, very loud.
pouts a lot
everyone calls nine cute, even the boys who are younger than him
likes to boss around patrick because he’s older
nine: patrick gimme that juice box!
patrick: you’re closer you get it!
nine: i’m older than you!
literally scared of everything
if he hasn’t seen it before and it’s living, he’s scared
jiayuan: *holds a bowl of tadpoles*
nine, several feet away: WAHHH WHAT IS THAT
the happiest when he gets snacks + real food food
also really likes to sing!! his favorite thing is watching disney movies because there’s so much music in it and he just loves to sing along
he’s not part of bo yuan’s worries because he’s literally scared of everything, but nine is really naive and would do things that the other kids tell him to do so, it’s a 50/50 on nine
(bo yuan: there was an edible decorative flower on keyu’s birthday cake couple days ago, and somehow jiayuan convinced nine all flowers were edible. so today during outside time nine almost ate the neighbor’s flowers)
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Lin Mo:
3 years old
LOUD. VERY LOUD.
probably the craziest most hyper one out of them all
he and jiayuan always have something bad planned
literally doesn’t have a moment where he’s calm
constantly in bickering mode with ak
lin mo: NO IM RIGHT
ak: NO. IM RIGHT
patrick: what are they arguing about?
keyu: *shrugs*
but is also best friends with ak so he’s also calm around him
(bo yuan: yeah these two have on and off days, you can never predict it)
and also constantly naruto runs around the daycare
bo yuan: lin mo stop running!
lin mo: *nyoom*
he also once nyoomed into keyu
keyu: ow what was that for?
lin mo: you were in my way!
and now he nyooms into keyu for fun
a very good mood maker
likes to smile/laugh a lot
would calm down if you show him a movie or a cartoon
number 2 on bo yuan’s worry list because he’s the "bad influence" for everyone, also he reduces hearing for everyone
(bo yuan: i’ve secretly made a tally book on how many times i have to say “lin mo” in a concerning tone this week and he came in 2nd. he was only here for like 3 days!)
-----------
Zhang Jiayuan:
3 years old
YOURE THREE STOP SMIRKING LIKE THAT
couple months younger than lin mo but this is the real culprit under a lot of his and lin mo‘s plans
it’s just because jiayuan has a lot of crazy ideas and he says them out loud and lin mo is just like “yes”
also sometimes they are just accidents, but he's always doing weird questionable things with lin mo
got really sad one time because he brought tadpoles and put them in the fish tank and killed them since the fish went nom
but then started to constantly catch for tadpoles to feed the fishes
bo yuan: jiayuan stop, you’re killing the frog population!
jiayuan: but the fishies are hungry *pouts*
likes to fight/mess around with keyu for no reason
keyu: *sitting there, drawing*
jiayuan, with a squishy hammer: *bops keyu’s head*
but also will protect keyu if anyone tries to mess with him
lin mo: *nyooms into keyu for the 3rd time of the day* jiayuan, hugs keyu: stop hurting him!
the calmest thing he likes to do is taking care of plants, probably because he saw bo yuan spraying the plants one time and he like to squeeze the spray bottle
number 1 on bo yuan’s worry list, this child is literally not safe alone or with anyone. they were trying to celebrate keyu’s birthday and jiayuan tried to touch the candles, while it was lit, by the flame.
(bo yuan: i just got the tablets and haven’t set up children mode, so i’ll take the blame for this one. but also why are kids so good with technologies nowadays??)
-----------
Patrick:
3 years old
squishy :D
smiley :DD
favorite thing is nap time and snack time
somehow knows every location where bo yuan hides their snacks
bo yuan: *getting the snacks that he hid in the piano*
patrick: *sitting next to the window sill with the snack* hi~
of course bo yuan can never get mad at patrick for eating the snacks because patrick doesn’t do anything bad
also he's a growing child
best friends with keyu,, and drags him on to “adventures”
*the daycare got a new toy play house*
patrick: bo yuan gege, keyu and I are moving out so we can go on an adventure!
keyu: I didnt agree to this??
wants bo yuan to add dress up into the daycare games, since he wants to dress up the other boys in the daycare
patrick: i call it, patrick fashion!
not part of bo yuan’s worries till he’s on his hunt for the hidden snacks, just because bo yuan is afraid he might hurt himself
(bo yuan: i started hiding the snacks higher up and one time i saw him trying to climb on keyu’s shoulders to grab it)
-----------
Zhou Keyu:
3 years old
smart, but really clueless at the same time
tall, but has the personality of smol
likes to draw
also likes to read with patrick,, but usually patrick falls asleep so it’s him, the book, and a sleeping patrick
wears glasses all the time since his vision isn’t so good but somehow he makes glasses look good on him???
has a chain with his glasses because there too many glasses incident with keyu
glasses #1 keyu: I don’t like them! *takes it off and loses it*
glasses #2 keyu: *takes them off for nap time, but riki accidentally rolled on to them and snapped it*
glasses # we don’t know how many: *disconnected from the keyu universe*
also like a month younger than lin mo but literally has to make sure lin mo doesnt “blow” the place up
lin mo: what if I stuck this fork into the pluggie thing?
keyu, picking lin mo up: nope you’re not
when keyu is clueless he either stands there or just sit there and space out, not really noticeable but bo yuan ran into him doing that a couple times
(bo yuan: I thought he was an ai that was malfunctioning, it scared me at first but now I know he just doesn’t remember what he’s doing)
oh did I mention this,, even though he’s one of the youngest, he’s the tallest, with that advantage he likes to try to pick people up
jiayuan: keyu pick me up!
keyu: no
patrick: keyu likes me more he will pick me up!
keyu: no
patrick: *pouts*
keyu: *tries to pick both jiayuan and patrick up at the same time*
bo yuan, running over: ZHOU KEYU PUT THEM DOWN YOULL BREAK YOURSELF
not too high up on bo yuan’s worry list, give him a piece of paper or book or anything he would just calmly sit there and do something with it
(bo yuan: every time when we do art or reading its so hard to pry keyu away, he has to finish what he was doing and he’s so concentrated he doesn’t hear anybody)
-----------
Liu Zhang (AK):
4 years old
loud, VERY LOUD.
he doesn’t know he’s loud
bo yuan: ak you don’t have to yell
ak: OKAY
monopolized over all the instrument music type of toys in the daycare
bo yuan: ak you know you have to share your toys right?
ak: I gave the ukulele to mika
honestly having ak is like having a walking megaphone so bo yuan ended up actually making ak his little helper for announcements
bo yuan: ak go tell everyone is lunch time
ak: alright!
ak: *da da da running to fetch his little stool*
ak, stands on a little stool in the middle of the play room: ITS LUNCH TIMEEEEEE-
nine, swats ak’s leg: YOU SCARED ME
the only time ak is quiet is when he’s around lin mo, he kinda just likes to watch lin mo and follow him around so that’s that
unless lin mo starts messing with him, then you just lose your hearing for the day
also at first bo yuan was trying to see what ak is interested in, and he taught ak hot cross buns on the bells and thought that would calm ak down,, but oops ak ended up making more noises
patrick: I WANNA SLEEP AK
(bo yuan: I swear something happened to this kid or something. he’s not hard of hearing but he’s just naturally so loud)
i too would lose my hearing if im around ak so much
not to high on bo yuan’s worries but he just make sure ak isn’t being too loud and bothering the other kids, usually he’s pretty good about that but you never know when a little patrick will start napping or anyone really so gotta contain his energy
(bo yuan: ak is usually the first one that’s awake from nap time but its usually like 5-10min before everyone else so i told him he can go and play but he just has to be quiet)
///////////
alrighty !! now you've met everyone in the daycare, what kind of fun and chaotic adventures are they going to have??
(all future daycare au things will be incorrect quotes + short little one shots, this intro mostly served as a bio so you understand their personalities a bit, and i hope you enjoyed it!)
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mewtonian-physics · 3 years
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🍼🌧🕊🦄
Thank you so much! (I didn't realize until just now that all ones I picked had the same color scheme, I think it looks kinda nice) - 🌻
:D i think so too! some of them arent showing up on my screen the way they probably are for yours, but it still looks nice ^-^
🍼- what is your favorite memory?
a favorite memory... a singular favorite memory... oh man, that's hard! i have some good ones. maybe the time some of my friends got together and threw me a surprise party for my birthday! that was so exciting. i thought they forgot about it and was sad, but then one day my mom said we should hang out and get coffee, and took me by the movie theater afterwards. i was really confused as to why, but then there was knocking on the car window and when i looked up a bunch of my friends were outside :) we went to see into the spider-verse and got pizza and frozen yogurt afterwards, and we went back to one of their houses and played jackbox games! it was so much fun. i'm never going to forget how happy i was that day. [kurapika voiceover 'i've been blessed with good friends']
🌧️- favorite thing to do on rainy days?
i go outside and i become one with the rain and then i come back inside and curl up with a blanket, some hot cocoa, and some good tv. its actually really fun just sitting outside when it's raining really hard, i definitely get soaked to the skin every time but it's worth it
🕊️- 3 habits you have?
i always sleep with music on, i can't ever seem to fall asleep as easily without it. usually i just put the same song on loop, it's very soothing.
i play air piano. it's like air guitar except instead of strumming it's tapping. and yes i do go with actual songs i know how to play
i am a compulsive organizer. you know those racks with personalized keychains and stuff like that, with the names on them? i always have to sit down and re-organize them whenever i come across one, to make sure all the names are in the right place. (i used to worry about the store employees complaining, but then i realized i'm taking some of the workload off of them for free, so...) and i pick at knots very frequently. i've posted this before but i'm really mad at alexander the great for just cutting the gordian knot, i could've undone that thing and he was a coward /joke
🦄- how do you perceive yourself?
i have chronic self-esteem issues but right now im doing pretty well so i can answer this happily. i like to think im funny and entertaining to be around. i enjoy being the 'life of the party' type that people can just have fun with. i am also incredibly melodramatic (most of the time intentionally for fun and profit) and often overly intense (not intentionally). when i'm interested in something, i'm REALLY interested in it. and i will talk the ear off of anyone willing to listen. (so sometimes i am very annoying.) i try to be a nice person but i'll admit sometimes i slip up in that regard. ummmm... i cant think of anything else right now! im sure ill come up with something later though
thank you! this was fun :D
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sunflowerseraph · 3 years
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HEEHEE! hits u back with the character game uhh thor or bucky :33
!!! I'll do... BOTH >:D ! It'll be long tho so I'm putting em under cuts :}
Here's the ask game btw!
Thor!
How I feel about this character: OH he's such a bi disaster. But he's trying his best. Textbook himbo. Crushed under the weight of his father's expectations of him alot of the time. Probably struggles with self worth nowadays too,with the battles and family he's lost! Also he's very much like those memes abt dudes/dads where they'll mention some horrible childhood trauma and then have some funny song playing in their head like nothin even happened.! I feel like he cares very deeply for the friendships he's made and the found family he's gained with the warriors three [rip] and the avengers! Overall? Kind himbo who respects women and forgets how smart he is sometimes.
All the people I ship romantically with this character: honestly this is such a hard question cause im sure if u presented me with like,good reasons for most people then I'd be on board. But so far one of my Main ships for Thor rn is Bruce and Thor <3 GammaHammer makes me happy :} I've seen thor n valkyrie stuff too which is like aight they're all bi4bi t4t prolly,but honestly a polycule or some shit w Bruce Val and thor would be Inch resting :} I'm not sure tho! Oh and Jane Foster I Guess but she's not rlly up there.
My non-romantic OTP for this character: OH absolutely thor and loki ! Brothers 🤍 I rewatch the thor movies the other day and seeing them fight together and hang out as kids made me so 🥺❗ yknow? I also think Thor n Darcy are a fun pair! Thor and the warriors three make me :} as well bc they're all buddies! That's his little family yknow!! Or. Was.
My unpopular opinion about this character: listen i know I just called him a himbo but he's smarter than people give him credit for I think. But also he's pretty cocky at times with his fighting ability and I feel like that's his greatest downfall. He tends to sorta think he can do everything on his own,and he doesn't rely on others until he really needs to and it ends up w him or his companions hurt :(
One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.: ough I wish we could've gotten more time to see him experiencing earth stuff! In other like shows n such (like one of the animated series) its funny to see him interacting with mortals and I feel like we don't get that enough. Like sure we got the "another!" Scene and if you watched the YouTube mocumentary he obviously doesn't understand money or jobs. But it's still funny and I'd like to see him go "I don't understand what that means :D" like an optimistic puppy yknow :]
Uhmm yeh that's for thor! OK Bucky time 🤍
Bucky-
How I feel about this character: I feel like. They should do more w him in the mcu! But that's just bc im a kinnie ig but it makes me sad that he's just viewed as Steve's Sidekick when he's got a personality and works so well as Sam's partner in TFAWTS! I like the representation he can bring to the table though,regarding disability (I mean even though. He's an enhanced person but yknow.) And mental health! He also shows that your past doesn't need to define you and you CAN be free and work past old mistakes.! I feel like he's a little out of touch sometimes bc of the time shifts and mental stuff goin on,but I'm not saying it's a bad thing,its just compelling to meeee
All the people I ship romantically with this character: I USED to ship stevebucky I won't lie,but I much rather prefer SamBucky bc its just better LMAO Sam is much cooler than Steve in many regards and to me Sam is a better influence on Buckys life ig? Like. Idk how to explain it well enough but their banter is better and they compliment eachother rather than one of them taking the reigns all the time. I just like the level playing field where it still feels like Bucky can be a Sidekick but his partner at the same time rather than Just Bucky Barnes. Idk if that makes sense but !
My non-romantic OTP for this character: honestly I'm not sure? I feel like if they could both get over association's with like...almost killing eachother Bucky and Nat could be friends :] both were molded to be Weapons and have to deal with their traumas and mental health. Obviously I also wish Steve would've stuck around bc I hate that he like.LEFT his best friend and new family,but whatever.
My unpopular opinion about this character: I think bucky is sort of a dork actually. Alot of people make him very stoic and Winter Soldiery but that's. Not all he is! He's a complex person who's been used and weaponized and its annoying whenever people try to say he's a stoic person or whatever. Like no bro ur thinking abt the winter soldier. Ofc the winter solider was/is part of him and that doesn't just shut off but I think it's bs to boil him down to Killing Machine Assasinator Ooo Scary! When he was also a soldier during. Fucking Ww2! He was also like shown to be a bit of a dorky guy who liked to dance and be with chick's n shit lmao,like he mustve been a charmer. And even after,like during tfatws he's shown to still have bits of that personality. He messes around with Sam's nephews and offers help without prompting and just overall wants to live a more peaceful life while still managing to be social and humorous. ("How old are you anyways?" "106.") Anyways I think what I'm saying is ppl tend to forget to split him and tws.!
One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.: this is sort of similar to the Thor thing but discovering new age shit! Like I wanna see him be bad at tech or be confused by new slang. Also wanna see him like, get annoyed at how the tech is where he's at vs. The wakandan tech. That shit probably blew his socks off and then he had to go hang w Americans and went :(?? How do i use a flip phone. The beads were so convenient in Wakanda HFNEBDB. I also wish we could've actually seen how bucky Healed in Wakanda?? Like however he was helped yknow? I'm sure they (mcu) can't like do much besides say he was Magically Cured Of Mental Illness so I guess I'm glad they left it up to whatever but. Still 😔
Anyways uhm yeah! Sorry this is so long sjdjf it prolly doesn't make much sense but 👍❤
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aloera · 3 years
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The ask prompt is too long to fit into an ask TT_TT but here's the doc for it docs(.)google(.)com/document/d/1yDI7iFRhOJ8ENv_IwZAo3rDSUqj80EiJROS10RzRbj4/edit
the lengths u are going for this,,, much appreciated you're very sweet!!!
prompts + answers under the cut!!
INTRODUCTION
Name: aloera
AO3 account: aloera
Fandoms you write for: bnha
How many stories have you written so far: 19
FANFICTION PROFILE
What's your favorite fandom to write for? hmm,,, used to do pjo and eah (ever after high) and eah was fun as fuck i will say!!! i think bnha is my fav mostly bc i made the most friends in this fandom :D
What's your favorite character/person to write for? bkg and kirishima!! cannot choose do not make me <3
Fic you'd want to improve? probably what we deserve? i rushed the beginning and the confession is a bit stilted imo
Hardest fic you've written? between lion and men -_- bc there is so much canon compliant stuff i've gotta write out before i get to the divergence and its HARD
Easiest fic you've written? come home to me!!! it happened so easily,,, no second guessing no writers block just vibes <33 was lovely i miss it
What would you say is the most "famous" fic you've ever written? also probably come home to me? its got the most interaction
first line of the first fic you've ever written and published. [not including my 2014 ffnet fics] "The bell rings, class starts, and Katsuki and Midoriya are inexplicably absent." from come home to me
Have you ever done a collab with another writer? yes!!!!! on two separate occasions and its so fucking fun i highly recommend trying it out its the best
Do you beta? if asked but honestly im a shit beta lmao
Do you like joining fic fests/exchanges? depends on what i have going on irl but in general yeah!!
FANFICTION PREFERENCES
Fluff or angst? definitely fluff
"OCs" or "Reader" inserts? reader inserts!! have been going ham on them recently
Blurbs or drabbles? blurbs!!
One thing you love about fanfiction i just. i really love slice of life romance?? and most media doesn't give you that bc its dedicated to plot and action and that's valid!! but fanfiction fills in the gap which is really nice
One thing you don't like about fanfiction most of the stuff i don't like is less about actual fanfiction and more about how people behave about it
What is/are your favorite fandom author/authors? IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE!!! TURN IT UP!!!
bnha: hiuythn, rae_tnub, Moniix, Ata_Lanta, wrunic, chezka, PurplePersnickety, surveycorpsejean, mahadevi, arxaris, deviance, Oceanbreeze7, MikeWritesThings, bonnia, wonhaebunny, dinosuns
voltron: hiuythn, Oceanbreeze7, DeerstalkerDeathFrisbee, arahir, dinosuns,
and honorable mention to loveclouds im not even in the haikyuu fandom i just love their fics So Much
these are just the ones off the top of my head i have so many favourites idc if i'm only supposed 2 have one!! die mad about it!!!
What is your favorite trope? secret relationship + relationship reveal til the day i die babie <3 <3
Least favorite trope? hm,,, probably just like. angst lmao i cannot stand 90% of it
A fanfiction cliché that you can't help but love? coffeeshop aus,,,, so good
Do you have a type when it comes to pairings? the otp where its like. piece of shit + himbo = love. ex. krbk, catradora, jade/beck
Favorite setting/au? hm,,, truly i cannot pick one KGKSJNHKj but i really like college aus!! and modern aus!! and roommate aus!!
Explain the meaning of your favorite line of dialogue you've written as if someone hasn't read it in context. “He doesn’t know,” Katsuki says, softly. “My timer stopped and nothing happened. He’s not mine.”
the line is from what we deserve!! it's a soulmate au where your timer counts down to the moment that you meet your soulmate!! bakugou's timer ends at USJ when he and kirishima attack kurogiri at the same time (impulsive kings <33) but kirishima's timer doesn't end until kamino because that's when he accepts himself as bakugous soulmate!! unfortunately, when bakugous timer has reached 0, he turned to see that kirishima's was still ticking and therefore believes that kirishima isn't his soulmate.
this line just,, idk. it's really sad. bakugou is such an action-driven character? if something doesn't go his way he Makes it go his way. he's got this insanely volatile quirk and he's got impeccable control of it!! but his love for kirishima isn't something that he can change and he's not going to ruin kirishima's chance of finding his own soulmate because he loves him and wants him to be happy. i really wanted to focus on how resigned he is? and how unusual that is for a character like him.
Favorite trope/genre to write? again, secret relationship with relationship reveals <33 fluff in general is my wheelhouse!!!
A trope/genre you haven't written but think would be a fun challenge? idk if this counts?? have been working on some dead dove concepts!! its super different from what i normally write so its a cool challenge
The one trope/concept you'll never touch and why probably cheating/infidelity?? it just looks,,, super difficult to write well and i don't have enough of an interest in it to try it out
Which do you prefer to write: longer or shorter fics? shorter!! low attention span gang <3
Ideal length to read? 5-10k?
Ideal length to write? 4-8k!!
How long was the longest fic you've ever written? control fraek is around 28k i think?
Have you ever written an AU? yeah!! i've done restaurant au's, soulmate au's, pro hero aus, and fantasy aus (general, not the bnha fantasy ending)
What's your favorite AU trope? hm,, probably when two people in authority are in a secret relationship? ceo's/uni professors/etc etc
Have you ever written smut? yeah!! was. difficult tho
What's your comfort genre? (the one you fall on most in writing/reading) fluff,,, hurt/comfort,,, fix-it fics with happy endings <3
If you were to start writing in other fandoms, which would they be? maybe jjk?? the characters are really cool!!!! fr i might go back to my ever after high roots i love the characters and setting so Much its so fun!!! idec if no ones into it anymore!!!!!
Is there a trope you think you could be easily recognized by in your writing? i've had people say they saw the mention of buff hagakure and recognized it was me so. probably that skdjhnksjd
WRITING STYLE
How would you describe your style? i tend to use shorter sentences and pretty simple words i think? and i gravitate towards lighthearted concepts that allow for ensemble casts and humour!!
Describe your style in three words romcom but fanfic
Favorite words to use when writing? the word reverent!! fuckin love including it!!
Dialogue tags or no dialogue tags? (she said, he said, they said, etc) dialogue tags!!!
Favorite dialogue tag (other than said, if you use them) again idk if this counts but "they said softly" is unmatched
Long sentences vs short vs a mix short <33
What colors would you use to describe your writing? hm,,, depends on the fic i would say?? control fraek is dark green to me?? kinda like a forest at night yk?? scary but there's still life there. sugar cookies is yellow like early morning sunlight, when it rains is yellowy-orange like a caution sign. not gonna list all of them cause theres a lot its just. do u get it? the colours change based on the vibe of the fic.
What song or music genre would you use to describe your writing? think. i am constantly trying to emulate that moment at the end of wasteland baby when hozier goes "im in love/im in love with you."
What kind of metaphors do you rely on? religious metaphors my beloved <33 they're just so pretty!!! i also love comparing stuff to water for some reason?? like that ocean vuong quote thats like "what are you now?/water." it goes hard!!!
What's something you'd say is experimental in your writing at this time? definitely action!! i have,,, no idea how to write it so anything i do is really just me playing around and seeing what works and what doesn't
Do you prefer to write by hand or to type? i've tried both!! personally i prefer typing because it goes way faster but i will say that writing by hand lets me get words down when i'm going through writer's block
What is your preferred place to write (notebook, laptop, cellphone, etc.)? laptop!!
What app/apps do you use to write (word, notepad, etc.)? google docs skjdnkjh its fine on desktop but mobile is,,,,, disgusting
Do you keep a notebook or file/notes page in your phone/device for notes on your writing? ngl i just have everything organized in my drive?? one folder per fandom and then sub folders for ideas+hcs, unfinished wips, and finished fics. multichaps get sub sub folders so i can organize outlines and drafts
Do you listen to music to help you write? yeah!! playlists organized by fic vibe :D
Where do you usually go to write (bedroom, living room, etc.)? mostly in my bedroom??? but moving around to different stops helps too i think!!
How long does it usually take for you to write? again this depends on what i have going on irl, how attached i am to the idea, my mindset at the time, etc!! i am,, the least consistent person skjnhdkjh.
What's your favorite font to use when writing? times new roman my beloved
Other writing habits? sometimes i'll write in the dark?? bad for my eyes but for some reason it gets the words flowing
CONCEPTUALIZATION
How do you conceptualize your ideas? (See specific moments like they're a movie, writing specific lines in your head, don't know until you put the words on paper, etc.) i tend to get inspiration from movies, books, poems, or other fics!!! sometimes one line just makes me go oh,, i want to write something like that,,, and then it helps me create an idea that makes me feel the same way?? i did this with control fraek!!!! i wanted a scenario where bakugou was cold and calculating and i was like hm. to do that he’d have to be focusing on something important. and from there i was able to flesh out the rest of the idea.
Which comes first: the pairing or the plot? with krbk its always always the pairing,, i'll be sitting there like wow <33 i love them <33 what if one of them had amnesia <33 (which, yes, wip!!) otherwise it's usually the plot!! and i slot in characters that i feel make sense
Have you ever used a prompt? yeah!! used a prompt for wlw week 2020 and it was fun as hell
Do you write around the story around a specific scene you want to get to or do you start from a plot idea definitely the first!!!! i almost always write like,,, a super messy scene thats 90% dialogue, keep it in my head, and then write the entire fic around that one moment
Do you find that you include a projection of some part of yourself in the way you write a character? a lot of the time when i write love confessions or love in general i'll have one of the characters think or say that the other person makes their head quiet? and it's because that's what i feel whenever i'm in love?? a quiet mind. i project on characters yeah but i think most of the projection actually goes to the way that i write love
Do you research some of the things you write deeply, partially and kind of wing the rest, or play entirely by ear (in this case, go with whatever base knowledge of the subject you have)? most of the time if i do research it'll be about the setting (ex. the izakaya in to have and to hold) or if i'm having the characters interact with an object that they like. need to know how to use (me, in control fraek: google. hey google. does someone die if they get shot in the foot??? no???? awesome thank u <3)
Have you ever had an idea for a story and forgot about it? lmaoo yeah all the time i'll find like 500-2k words of concepts in my gdocs like i do. not remember this at all
Is there a trope you think you could be easily recognized by in your writing? probably krbk secret relationship lmao
Are there concepts you've tried that turned out better than expected? yeah!! i fully thought the action in control fraek would be awful but it turned out not bad??? which im happy with
Are there concepts you've tried that turned out worse than you expected? again, what we deserve, i personally think it would have worked out better if i'd paced it slower and drawn out the pining but i. do not feel like going back to fix it so its staying the way that it is. pining is so fucking hard to do AHHHH i get so tired with it!!! im like just date already!!!!
PROCESS
How do you come up with titles? in rare occasions (literally. all my multichaps for some reason) the title comes after writing like .5 words of the first chapter im like YES this is it!!!!! sometimes i write the whole thing and pick out one line that fits (what i did with come home to me) a lot of the time i just. steal from songs or poems that i like
What's your favorite emotion to cause on your readers? i like making people happy!!!! love when people comment saying they're cheered up
What's your favorite emotion to write? lovelovelovelovelovelove
Have you ever cried or felt any emotion while reading something you've written? never cried?? but sometimes i'll rereading my hurt/comfort fics 4. yk. comfort
Do you write in order or whatever comes to you? in order!! unless i have a scene that i Need to write and i'll quickly jot it down so that i don't forget
Usual way you procrastinate while writing? ...doing asks like this, making playlists, discord, watching netflix. what don't i do smh
Do you outline or free write? i am. so shit at outlines. i mostly free write and write lil notes for stuff that i wanna add later
Do you set word goals or scene goals (scenes you want to include)? yes!! like i said i'll write loose notes for scenes that i want to add later!! it gives me something to write towards :D
What do you consider when writing your scenes? what goes into making the atmosphere and mood you want? to set a scene i do two things? the first is like,, the five senses bc that always sets the scene really well and makes it feel Real. i'll visualize stuff in my head like its a movie and write out what i would want to tell the set designer?? if the lights are low, if the space is busy, if it's supposed to exude comfort or not.
for putting forward the character's mood one thing i've found that makes a difference is sentence length!! long sentences are good for making a character seem flustered and nervous or not really in control of their emotions? good for love confessions. short sentences are good for when the character is focused on something or short on time. good for fights!!
What's something you never considered to include in your writing that you can't leave out now? def buff hagakure,,,, once i thought of it i was like. if i don't include this at least once in every single fic how could i look at myself in the mirror!!!!!! how could i face anyone!!!!
How do you start a story? establishing a fact about the character or describing the setting! option a is one single thread of gold, option b is between lion and men
How do you end a story? either by tying it back to the beginning or doing like a funny kind of closing??? option a is sugar cookies, option b is a godless society
How do you get out of writer's block? change something!! move something!! i go from typing to handwriting, moving from my bedroom to my living room, switching wips to work on something else!! i do sprints as well?? give myself like fifteen minutes to write something and sometimes 200 words opens up the way for another 2k. sometimes i'll just delete like 500 words and start fresh
Do you edit? or do you toss your writing out there? i edit!!! i'll go over it myself then send it to one or two betas (bee my beloved <33)
How do you edit? do you use spellcheck, grammar checkers, etc? bee is my grammar checker bc he is So Good with grammar. i use grammarly as well for spellcheck stuff mostly?? sometimes my edit process is just like "am i tired of looking at this!! yes <3" and then i post it
PROGRESS
Do you usually like what you write? yeah!!! i post stuff that makes me happy and that i'm fine with rereading!!! i write stuff for self-indulgence reasons first and foremost and i think my writing reflects that sjhnksj
Have you ever written something you didn't like but posted anyways? nope!! even what we deserve i LIKED even if i see a lot of room 4 improvement!! if i don't like smth it's not getting posted
Do you find yourself rereading your writing often? yeah!! the reason i wrote so much krbk secret relationship is because i loved it but i'd read all that there was so i just,, wrote more,, ngl its kinda nice being in a place where i actually like my writing bc i can write stuff that i want to see and really enjoy it!!
Can you tell us anything about your current WIP? sure!! i'm currently working on when it rains which is a fic where bakugou gets hit by a crying quirk!! i'm gonna be using it to explore So Much of all might's character and his relationships with bakugou and aizawa (and i think some people from his past!!)
Can you give us a sneak peek on your current WIP? “You did something. What the hell did you do?” Kirishima sounds pissed off. It would amuse Katsuki if he wasn’t fighting just to stay standing.
“Nothing he didn’t ask for,” Shinsou replies.
“K’ri… shima,” Katsuki croaks out. “‘S fine. Not him.”
His chest collapses back into the familiar dry heaving after that but Kirishima shuts up. He doesn’t apologize to Shinsou.
Kirishima’s a good friend, stubborn and loyal. He stands by Katsuki’s side like an attack dog, blocking him from the view of anyone ogling at his tears.
The last line you've written Ochako knows more than she'd realized. She knows enough to keep her guard up.
It’s not enough.
Open a wip. what’s the first line?
Katsuki wakes up feeling like absolute fucking shit.
INSIGHT
What's your favorite thing about writing? touched on this before but it's mainly just being able to write the things that i want to see and actually enjoy them!!! actually reread them!!!! i thought "wouldn't it be cool if bkg and kirishima owned a restaurant together" and then i wrote it and i like it enough to reread it!!!! being able to create content for myself makes me. so happy
How do you keep yourself inspired? this is gonna sound narcissistic maybe but honestly i'm just really excited about my ideas and where i'm gonna take them and the idea of "i'm gonna get to That scene" keeps me going through the entire thing. also my friends!!!! i'll talk to them about fics and their reactions keep me hyped up enough to finish!!!!
What is your favorite thing to write? just,, slice of life romance,,, stuff thats silly and makes people laugh!!
What do you think your strengths are in writing? i'm good with dialogue!! i do lil voice acting sessions with myself to make sure everything sounds natural and like it's coming from that character skhjnskj
i'm comfortable with my portrayal of love as well??? i spend a lot of time thinking about what it is exactly that i'm trying to get across and i think it turns out well!!
What are things you wish you could practice more? on one hand i wanna get better at writing angst on the other hand i dislike writing angst. do you see my issue
One way you've improved your writing since you began? characterization!! i think i've gotten better at writing characters that are all Different and bring different things to the table!!! i used to project a lot more and it would compromise the characterization because the character was like 70% me and 30% them? not to say that projection is bad but if you do it too much it just,, doesn't read like the character and from a reader's standpoint the narrative can become less compelling
One aspect of writing you're still working on? writing action!!! i. literally hate writing it but i write for a fandom about superheroes so. Unfortunately i gotta learn.
A piece of writing advice you've learned while writing saw this on another tumblr post but they said sometimes if you're struggling with a scene, the problem is five lines back. i've found that to be true!!!! sometimes u gotta delete a chunk and start a little ways back!! i did this with too busy being yours because i was stuck for Weeks and i deleted like 25% of what i had but it helped me actually finish it :D
A bit of writing advice you can't stand when people shit on show don't tell for being overrated lmao bc when u read their writing you can Tell
Something you wish you knew when you first started writing? ,,,,honestly i kind of wish i could know some of the stuff that i used to when i first started writing?? technically i'm better now but creatively i was must better when i wasn't stressing about whether anyone would like what i was writing. so i guess i wish i knew that i should keep that confidence? i kinda wish that i wasn't as insecure about other people's writing styles because i never used to be!!
Something you've learned in life that you apply in writing there's no point in feeling inferior?? writing one genre isn't better than the other. being in one fandom isn't better than being in another. the kind of language you use or the length of your paragraphs- none of that stuff like. matters. what matters is that you're having fun and happy with what you're creating!!!! enjoy other peoples writing but don't let it make you feel worse about yours :D
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deeeelightfuldee · 3 years
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Are you better at cooking dinners or making cakes/biscuits/sweets? baking definitely. I want to get more comfortable cooking.
Have you ever cut someone else’s hair? yes. I used to be pretty good at doing my brothers hair-- even the fading. But I’m sure I’ve forgotten it all by now.
Who was the last guest in your house and what were they staying for? probably my sister or my nephews.
How many long term relationships have you been in? blegh. not many. Whenever I’d know that it didnt have long term potential, id drop it. no sense dragging out the inevitable.
Do you sleep with all the lights out, or do you leave a lamp or even the television on? so for the longest time I kept my room super dark. I slept well. once miller died and kile broke my heart, I couldn’t sleep without the tv playing. I needed to hear something calming and voices talking so I wouldn’t be left with my thoughts. I still can’t turn it off.
Who is one person you have forgiven, but still have not “forgotten” what they have done? i think its easy to say “forgive and forget” but the reality is that once we have endured trauma we don’t easily forget. I think its kind of unrealistic. I’m trying to forgive kile but thats going to take.. i dont know how long. As for what it was... it was just betrayal.. lying. for six+ years. lots of laughing at me. 
Are you a fan of Lana Del Rey? I like some of her songs.
Do you know your blood type? o+
Do you know your mother’s birthday? Yes. its coming up. 
Have you ever been pregnant? I dont think so. I was really late after my assault but who knows.
How old were you when you first went on a plane? like 7ish
Have you ever had to take out a loan for anything? Yeah, student loans. 15k feels so daunting right now.
Are both of your blood parents still in your life? One is. My mom.
When was the last time you went apple picking? highschool maybe?
Someone asked you what you wanted, what would you say? money.. or a trip.
Have you ever been drunk at school or work? definitely not. 
How many bedrooms are in your house? four. 
Are you smart about computers? I know some stuff.
Have you ever played Just Dance for Wii? oh heck’n yeah
Do you own a Xbox 360? I had one from my brother for a little while but I traded it for the gamecube since Kile was going to send me one of the 15 he had lol. That didn’t end up happening, but its OK i really dont need more gaming.
Would you ever do a sex tape for a million dollars? oooooooo.. probably not.
So, do you need a nap? all day is full of naps to try and get over this.
What would you rather be doing? school
What sport are you the best at? maybe volleyball or swimming
Do you have a little sister? What’s her name? Nope, im the baby. 
Do you complain a lot? no, i try not to. I find complaining to be the most unattractive and yet common human trait and while there are definitely situations worthy of complaining, most of the time it just makes a situation worse than it actually was.
Would you rather go to an authentic haunted house or an ancient temple? temple
Do you like fruity or minty gum? definitely minty
Are you looking forward to any day of this month? i was really looking forward to Kile’s birthday on monday, but since we arent talking anymore then there is no joy in that. all the other special dates have been ruined by covid.
Have you ever gotten detention? Nope. homeschoolers and detention arent a thing. 
Is there a traumatic event that you’ve experienced that’s changed your life? oh sure. heartbreak, deaths, assaults, etc.
Do you buy a majority of your clothes from a certain store, or do you just pick out items of clothing you could see yourself wearing, not caring about the store it came from? no, i can’t be super picky because not every store carries clothing long enough for me.
Have any of the artists you’re fond of released new albums recently? i havent got a clue
Would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet? I mean I’m very fond of cats & dogs
Ever cried so much you threw up? this is what happened the whole 2-3 weeks following finding out about Kile.
Who is your best guy friend? I suppose now that would be Nathan
What do you two do when you hang out? drives, game nights, get food/drinks, or just talk.
What is a movie that you thought you would hate but you ended up loving? Her
Do you even like horror movies? not particularly. I’ll watch them if someone else wants to but its not my preference.
Do you live in the country? i live in the suburbs i suppose.
What is your favorite accent? Some southern and British accents. <same ... i have no idea how I made the font like this.
Have you ever had a boyfriend your parents didn’t like? Not that I can think of.
Do you drink Pepsi or Coke? diet coke
What do you plan to do on your 21st birthday? my family celebrated during the day and then I think nathan took me out on the town
Do you have any person in your family with an addiction to beer? nope.
Do you take a lot of pictures? man. this question is hard. I used to love taking pictures of myself. I had much more self confidence and some of it was because kile LOVED my selfies -- or so he said. and I just had so much fun doing that. Since the heartbreak, I’ve maybe taken 10 selfies. I just don’t have any self confidence in my looks anymore. its so different now. most of my pictures now are of other people or scenery.
What kind of face wash do you use? cerave when I want to. otherwise i use water and a very particular type of fabric. 
Does drama always seem to follow you? No, i dont think so.
Does anybody in your family race? like cars? running? no.
Are you closer to your mom or dad? My mom.
How much money did you used to get from the ”tooth fairy?” I think i got it like 2x and it was a dollar.
Do you have a laptop or desktop? Laptop.
Do you like your parents? i love my mom.
Do you secretly like someone? No.
Would you ever date your best male friend? I don’t see any romantic feelings developing between nathan and I
What are you currently listening to? I have gilmore girls on.
Do you want to be single? oooof. Um. I am torn on this subject. On the one hand, i really am ready to be loved, held, protected, cared for, etc. I love the idea of building a life together with someone and us both protecting our unit. I miss supporting, cherishing, loving on someone. Yet on the other hand, im fine being single. I have so much insecurity about myself lately that I dk that anyone else needs to deal with that baggage. Idk
Did you go out or stay in last night? I stayed in. ill be staying in for some time.
Have you pretended to like someone? romantically, no. professionally, yes.
How is your heart lately? Sad. heavy. 
Are you wearing socks? not at the moment. 
What do people call you? Di, diana, dee, ana, di-nan-na, dine-uh, deenah.
Do you get stressed out easily? no, I really dont
Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance? yes
What is wrong with you right now? im sick. im heartbroken.
Do you own something from Hot Topic? not that I know of. if I do, it’d be from like middle school. I never shopped there but people tended to give gifts from there.
Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone? Alone. maybe I havent found the right sort of person to share a bed with.
Do you still talk to the person you last made out with? No.
Have you ever seen your best friend cry? Yes, several times. 
Did you get any compliments today? No.
Have you ever gone to a beach? many many many times.
What would you say if someone asked you to get high right now? not my thing. at all.
Do you believe that everything happens for a reason? Yes.
Have you ever done volunteer work just because you wanted to? Yes.
Do you have long nails? they are healthy length. I want to grow them out a bit more. 
Do you like the gender you are? Yeah.
Do you generally look nice in photos? Not anymore
Have you ever had a stick insect as a pet? no haha
What colour are your father’s eyes? Blue.
If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer? uhhhhm, blue october
Would you ever get into a long distance relationship? maybe not anymore. 
What’s your favorite hot beverage? hot chocolate from dunkin
Did you ever play an instrument? If so what? i did. no comment.
Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents? oooooohhhhhhhhh man i love both.
Do you think you’re important? I mean i offer some importance to this world but eh.
What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? Hmm no idea.
Have you been diagnosed with any mental disorders? no
Have you ever moved to another state or country? If so, how did it feel to be new? No.
Do you know how to properly eat food with chopsticks? Nope.
What was the first thing you ate today? I haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday
If you could spend the day, doing absolutely anything, with anyone, anywhere, what would it be like? for the longest time it was to spend the day driving aimlessly and getting food and talking about everything and nothing with Kile. now, its just.. idunno. blank.
If I were to ask you how you are doing, and you were only able to answer completely honestly, what would come out? I’m not doing well.
What is the one thing that you have been avoiding that you should do? There’s a few things related to school.
Is there anything that you wish you could take back? not really, no.
What, in your mind, could make you truly happy? this whole covid nonsense going away, heartbreak to soothe, and my miller back.
If you could change one conversation in your life, what would you say differently? Would it have REALLY made any difference? i dont know. 
When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it? I just changed it up so itll be a bit.
Do people normally say you’re a fast typist, or are you rather slow? Fast.
Have you ever been considered the ‘smartest person in school?’ yes. several times.
How many drugs are in your system? lol lots of meds rn to kick this. usually none.
What’s on your schedule for tomorrow? the same as today.
Do you currently have any bite marks/hickeys on your body? No. i dont like the idea of bite marks but hickeys were fun for a time. in not visible areas tho.
Do you call anyone baby? Not anymore.
What’s your current mood? Bleh.
What were you doing before filling out this survey? Watching gilmore girls
How late did you stay up last night? I took PM meds at i wanna say 8? maybe 7? I don’t remember.
When was the last time you cried really hard? its been a few weeks since ive cried about Kile. I’m in the numb stage.
Is your hair longer than your shoulders? hahahahahahah
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carcinized · 3 years
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I forgot how to throw a boomer rang,,,,,
But then it came back to me!!
(Cant remember if ive told this one already or not,,, but oh well!!! Also talk about la la land all you want :D havent watched it yet still so im not sure if i can provide the best responses but :D!!! Also hope youve had an amazing day!!)
oh thats good :DD in both ways lmao :DD
i dont think you have but who knows basdjfkjsdf and YAY THANK YOU I DONT MIND IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND I JUST WANT TO RAMBLE!!!!
warning though this DOES have spoilers so if you dont want those then dont read this LMAO
edit: ummm this got long
mostly i want to talk about the leitmotifs in this movie because holy SHIT!!!! THEYRE GOOD!!!!
so you have all the main themes n stuff. and stuff they represent based off what is shown in the scenes, which i will list :D
another day of sun - hopefulness, dreaming of an artistic break (yk the type of stuff you move to LA for!)
someone in the crowd - having someone important in the crowd. a loved one OR a producer or smth!!
mia & sebs theme - hopefulness and eventually melancholy, like how their relationship went. yk.
a lovely night - mostly just being in love/falling in love. this one doesnt show up as much in motifs that ive noticed so i havent thought abt it as much actually!!
hermits habit - just sebastian really lmao.
city of stars - this one changes meaning in each reprise of it, but i would go with a sort of... hopeless hopefulness. i dont really know how to explain it. the inability to snuff out your hope for a hopeless dream (or a dream you perceive to be hopeless).
planetarium - HAPPY DREAMING AND LOVE N STUFF!!!
audition/the fools who dream - kind of mias version of city of stars, i think. only a bit more hopeful. its about dreamers and how they can come off as crazy and how much it hurts to dream but how we keep going. mostly it's like the sad aspect of dreaming, but bc it's told by a dreamer about a dreamer, it still has that hopeless hopefulness i talked about for city of stars.
and then we reach the epilogue--a combination of all the songs, all the meanings. when you combine it with the reprises of scenes and music paired to new scenes and paired with new songs the meanings are fucking INCREDIBLE.
so it starts with a mia & sebs theme that sebastian plays on his piano at the club she pushed him to create that he always wanted, with her in the audience. it's a somber retelling of their story, still as gorgeous as ever.
it cuts back to their scene at the club, when seb pushed her aside after she was drawn in by his music. however, in this daydream version of their relationship, sebastian kisses her instead. BOOM!!! planetarium begins playing!!!! love n dreaming and happy n stuff!!!!
the music switches to another day of sun. theyre hopeful, theyre still dreaming of their breaks. during the replaying of this song, seb opens his club & turns down the offer for a job in john legend (forgot his character's name OOPS)'s band and mia puts on her play & the crowd (featuring seb this time!!! love it!!).
boom!!! someone in the crowd is playing now!!! there's an insanely clever visual motif that combines the scenes of another day of sun (the set's road and people dancing on it), someone in the crowd (four girls dancing in dresses), a lovely night (yellow dresses and streetlights), city of stars (a row of streetlights and people dancing!), AND planetarium (people dancing on top of LA's signature stars on the ground w names of famous people!). you could probably also include mia & sebastians theme bc theyre walking through it together holding hands. then mia's very own "someone in the crowd" appears to take her hand--the agent who was at her show and wants her to audition. (which is also a motif of the fools who dream in this same scene... fuck).
the fools who dream begins to play softly. mia's audition goes well.
it switches to being played in the style of planetarium. the implications of planetarium mixed with the fools who dream. oh my god. a happy ending for the dreamers?? where they get love and happiness and achieve their dreams?? IS THIS NOT WHAT HER WHOLE DAYDREAM DURING THIS EPILOGUE IS????
then it switches to being played in the style of hermit's habit--SHE HAS SEBASTIAN IN THIS DAYDREAM!!!!
planetarium is there in full force!!! theyre GETTIN MARRIED!!!!! happy n love n dreams!!! YEAH!!!! then of course they DANCE IN THE STARS AGAIN!!!!! MOTIFS YEAH!!! ALSO I JUST REALLY LIKE THE SCENE!!!
then city of stars as a home video style montage of their marriage plays in a theatre (reminiscent of their first date that led to the planetarium song its going backwards with the thing its cool ITS COOL ITS COOL) anyways of course its getting sad again now because this is all just a dream. hopeless hopefulness.
and we're back to seb's club!!! he's playing mia and seb's theme, and the melancholy shows. none of that dream was real, but at least they get to keep bits and pieces. there's always a happy and sad undertone to this song.
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noahhernandez · 4 years
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2/9/2015 v. 8/11/2020
1:Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. My favorite movie is Scream, and it started when I saw the midnight premier of Scream 4 with my dad back when I was in 8th grade, then Scream 1 came on AMC late on night and I just really like it
I still think Scream is one of my favorites, but Halloween has jumped up there just because I am obsessed with all things horror really lol. I started to love Halloween because of the new trilogy.
2:Talk about your first kiss. It’s really not that interesting but really like embarrassing. It was with my first boyfriend and I had just turned 15 and we were at the school just walking around and we went into the band hall and I was like ok im leaving and he was like wait and we kissed and i was like o
the same ! 
3:Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for. I never really have had intense feelings for anyone. I d k
One my exes- I mean we were dating for awhile so that’s pretty intense to me. 
4:Talk about the thing you regret most so far. I regret… Nothing really I mean, I have done really bad things in my life, but i don’t regret them
I regret failing like 2 semesters of college lmao and almost dropping out. If i didn’t then I would 1- would have been done earlier and 2- would have already completed a year of grad school but IDK also another is wasting lots of money in 2017-2018
5:Talk about the best birthday you’ve had. The best birthday I’ve had was.. Idk This year was was nice I saw Iggy Azalea in concert, then I celebrated my friends’ birthday then mine and it was just everyone got to get together so ya this year my 18th
For my 21st birthday I went to Portland, Oregon and spent the weekend there and it was pretty and my first time there so it was nice despite what I think about PDX now. I don’t even know what I was doing for my 19 and 20th birthday lol. 
6:Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had. My 17th birthday because I was stuck 2 hours away from home with a bunch of nerds doing a band competition 
That is still probably my worst birthday. I forget to mention that I was gone literally from like 7am to midnight. They werent a bunch of loser nerds, they were my friends, but I still wish I was just at home lol. 
7:Talk about your biggest insecurity. I am skinny, but not fit. If I eat anything I get this like stomach and it makes me so sad. and ever since I got a job I work odd hours and I eat a lot of fast food and I’ve gained 10 pounds in 2 years and I guess i’m insecure about my weight
I am still insecure about my weight, and I probably weight like 5 pounds more than I did when I made this post 5 1/2 years ago. 
8:Talk about the thing you are most proud of. We have band banquets for band, and I only went my sophomore and junior year, and seniors give out awards to underclassmen that are just jokes really, and both years 4 different seniors gave me an award for being the biggest gossip in the entire band and I was proud of that lol
Well since then I have graduated both high school and college. I am proud that I finished college !! A BS in Psych. Proud of myself that I got promoted (in 2017) at my job; i’m proud of myself that I have my own apartment, and blah blah basically just doing regular adult shit. 
9:Talk about little things on your body that you like the most. I like my nose because of how perfectly fixed it is. I also really like my freckles/moles/dark marks idk what they are exactly, but they’re on my face and they look great
I still feel the same way about this, maybe add my eyebrows- they’re not like clean and nice they’re just expression markers on my face that i love.
10:Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had. I got into a fight with my old friend Angelica and that was almost 4 months ago and we used to be best friends and now we never talk.
When Janett didn’t talk to me all summer of 2019 because I told our other friend Angel something
11:Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had. I cant remember one 12:Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had. I can’t remember one
13:Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time. The closest thing i’ve had to like sex was being locked in a back of an SUV with a stranger drunk as fuck and naked and its embarrassing
Just awkward and nothing to which I expected. 
14:Talk about a vacation. When I was 16, the high school band took a trip to Hawaii, and all my friends were in band so it was great. We did a lot of things, we toured Pearl Harbor and even played a few patriotic songs on the USS Miss. and our hotel was on Wakiki beach. I went snorkeling in some beautiful water and shit and idk just walked all around Hawaii having a great time omg we got on stage at the Hard Rock Cafe and sang with German people i miss it
Hm that was fun. But I.. went to NY with my ex and that was pretty cool because I literally love New York, and I went to NOLA two years ago (today actually) and got miserably drunk so that was fun too 
15:Talk about the time you were most content in life. Probably just in the middle of junior year when everything and everyone was going with the flow
I feel like 2016 was a very content year because I remember nothing about it. 
16:Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to. Idk which one to talk about the one where I had a lot of fun and risked my life or the one where there was a lot of drama stirred up and drank myself to sadness. 
I haven’t really been to a party? I have gone out and had good times. Really anytime my friends and I go out I am having a good time 
17:Talk about someone you want to be friends with. I am already friends with people I want to be friends with
18:Talk about something that happened in elementary school. I kissed a boy on the back of the head and i told I just fell onto his head
Let me think of another one. Back in like fourth grade my friend was in a wheel chair and his backpack was falling from the back and I was trying to grab it and i was only 3 feet tall i couldnt see over or wasnt paying attention and i crashed him right into the bookshelves at the library. 
19:Talk about something that happened in middle school. A girl was mad at me because idk why lol and she pushed me in the hall way and I fucking flew across that hall on the floor and hit the wall she’s pregnant now
When I was in 5th grade (which is considered middle school in my district) I was standing on the play ground and someone threw a stick at my head and it knocked me the fuck out and I was bleeding from my temple.
20:Talk about something that happened in high school. In Jr. Year I was pulling into the parking lot but I was texting and I accidentally put half my car on grass area near the side walk luckily it was 7am and only one person saw me do it lol
One summer going into our senior year we had a party at Michelle’s house. First of all we were very drunk and Coby’s parents were like we are coming over and we cleaned TF UP so fast and sat on the couch and turned on I Know What You Did Last Summer and his parents were like interesting and and left and then we continued to drink anyways- we started playing truth or dare and my friend Angelica was like I dare u to kiss Anthony (someone I had liked prior) and he wouldnt and we started attacking him and calling him homophobic and hitting him with pillows lmao- him and I are still friend-ish
21:Talk about a time you had to turn someone down. I can’t think of something right now.
Literally anyone on grindr.
22:Talk about your worst fear. I’m afraid of having no career and being stuck doing something I hate and living paycheck to paycheck
Yeah, I’m scared of that still but I.. think just like being broke and jobless. RN with the pandemic we aren’t really working and still getting gov’t assistance, so.  IDK being a real real adult scares me a lot. 
23:Talk about a time someone turned you down. I can’t think of a time :)
One time in like 2016 maybe idk - this dude told me to come over and he lived far like not that far maybe 25 minutes lol far for me anyways I got to his apartment and there was a gate code and i asked him what it was and he didnt answer and it was like 2-3am and nobody was coming in or out and so i was like damn this sucks lmao
24:Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot. Nothing really has meant a lot to me. Everyone tells me the same thing over and over again and its so surface level
I still can’t think of anything but I’m sure the friends I have met since this and my friends Faith, Michelle, Peter, and Alisa have said something supportive that meant a lot to me. 
25:Talk about an ex-best friend. Angelica Ramirez. She was my best friend for only 3 years, but together we went through A LOT of shit. We started out senior year just fine, but she lied about a few things and made a lot of us feel like crap in October. I won’t lie, I do miss her. We have too many memories to just forget, too many funny stories and great adventures. She helped me with too much, and sometimes I think about how I cut her out of my life and I mad a bad choice. But only time can heal things and I have moved on and truly found people that won’t make me mad every 30 seconds. 
Brianna Pajak, I don’t remember anything about her except she was poor and we stopped being friends because she always wanted to fight and be annoying. 
26:Talk about things you do when you’re sick. Lay on bed on my computer and watch TV
I normally just suffer and cry about wishing I was healthy again.
27:Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body. Their…!!>>>??? 
I must have nice hands and ur nose must be nice too! so nose and hands. lol
28:Talk about your fetishes. none
yeah I don’t have any lol not that I can think of. 
29:Talk about what turns you on. Idk i really like kissing and touching and this is awkward. 
30:Talk about what turns you off. bad breath by
that and ugly/rough hands, acne sorry i know it is natural but, shorter than me lol, white people, long hair on guys, and thats about it i think hm i am single yes 
31:Talk about what you think death is like. I think its like idk its scary tho
um idk i dont like thinking about death because i literally want to cry when i think about it. 
32:Talk about a place you remember from your childhood. I remember being in trees a lot
My step grandma’s a lot because my parents were working and she would watch us. She passed away about a month ago :( 
33:Talk about what you do when you are sad. I usually only tell one person and that person is Alisa and I cry sometimes to her and expect her to make things better and she does thank u
I be doing the same thing, I text someone and that person could really be anyone but it happened the other day and I texted Bri and she was very helpful. 
34:Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured. I have no idea, I’ve never broken pulled strained twisted fractures or anything i have no life
I still haven’t done any of that stuff to my body. I also have burn scars but I did not feel those when it was happening. I would just say i guess my wisdom teeth coming in because I did not get them removed. I have 3 out lol.
35:Talk about things you wish you could stop doing. Pushing potential love interests away 
I have had some ‘love interests’ since this post, but it’s been about a year now since and I kind of push away the opportunity of getting close to someone. I also need to stop being a bitch sometimes. 
36:Talk about your guilty pleasures. eating 
I would say idk eating was a stupid answer. 
37:Talk about someone you thought you were in love with. never
I was in love and i didn’t ‘think’ I was in love. I don’t know what you mean by talk about them, they were my partner but we broke up hehe.
38:Talk about songs that remind you of certain people. Fireflies by Owl City reminds me of my 7th grade crush Fancy by Iggy Azalea reminds me of my two friends Michelle and Alisa idk anything else
um Idk. i rly cant think  39:Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier. I wish I would have known that
That it’s okay to tell people you’re struggling lol . That is okay to fail sometimes (school).  40:Talk about the end of something in your life. everything is just about to start
When I ended how to get away with murder I wish I never did I love that show with all my heart. 
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nekomas-koi-fish · 3 years
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1/2 hi i’d love a matchup w one of the volleyboys! i’m filipino, brown eyes five seven with really curly short black hair in a kinda mullet shape. ive got thick thighs, medium waist and not busty lol. i’m really ✨insecure about my body✨i’ve got light tan skin and love to laugh and have fun. im a softie who will not hesitate to deck you. a “punch you with love” kinda gal. also super sarcastic with humor only consisting of puns.
2/2 I want a “brolationship?” where we’re best friends and i can act like a dumbass but also mix in some softness to it too. i’m esfp and really energetic around my friends but when i get home my social battery is Dead. i love to sing and i write music so i’d 100% serenade him. i get As in my classes even though i don’t know what i’m doing but outside of the classroom i am a complete dumbass. thank you in advance and i’m sorry if this is too much!
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It’s perfect, I see it already :’)
My style isn’t suitable for everyone, I usually do bullet point and a short story, I hope you like it! I loved writing this lol.
It’s cannon, Bokuto likes plump girls, he stated it, right before he got hit.
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Koutarou Bokuto
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* Precious Bo, he sees your a bit on the thicker side, and thinks, “That’s pretty.”
* Bo showers you with praise and love on any normal day, BUT when he sees you getting sad and start picking at yourself, he’ll come up behind you, wrap his arms around your shoulders, hands running down your arms until his reaches your hands and makes you hug yourself while he hugs you, he placed his chin on your shoulder and looks at you in the mirror, your sad eyes hurt him and he gives you a small smile and starts to list off things about you that make you special to him.
* Bokuto, will love you to no end, he loves the endless jokes and sarcastic humor that comes out of you. Admires the fact that you sometimes get brave enough to smack Kuroo on the back of the head even if he towers both of you.
* Slightly confused when you hit punched him and then held himself bud begged him to never leave you alone again, Then hit him over the head with a pillow when he wouldn’t stop taking during nap time.
* Puns? Bokuto loves puns, he’s a sucker for them, and when you come up with a good one that has him crying, he’ll call or drag you to Kuroo and make you tell him so he can brag and say “You hear that? My girlfriend is funnier then yours, oh wait, you don’t have one.”
* Bokuto, is the perfect brolationship, at four in the morning he’s willing to party and have just dance competition while screaming along to music at the top of his lungs, then cue cuddling until late morning, followed by sleepy brunch, and then instead gaming or whatever you two decide to do, will take you to walk the park and make terrible jokes about anything or challenge you in some beach volleyball. Don’t know how to? Well! Let the one of the countries best aces teach you! If you agree he’ll be ecstatic. Over the months he’s learned one thing, getting home after a long day, he’s in boyfriend mode, which means, he’ll probably hold you close to his chest, laying down on the bed under a blanket with the school on watching Netflix with sleepy eyes, or cuddled into he sofa in a fuzzy blanket, he hold you, and let’s your head fall between his neck and shoulder. Your watching tv, but he’s watching you, being able to admire you for once, without distraction... for once, he’s content doing nothing.
* Serenade this boy. He’ll swoon, and brag, and die, and revive, and record and send it to Akaashi, Kuroo, Tsukkishima, Hinata, and everyone else who will listen to him. Especially if you do in a cheesy way, throwing pebbles at his window and standing outside and you wave your arms to get his attention and he’s confused at first because “WHY ARE YOU OUTSIDE IN THE DARK?! COME INSIDE!” He pushed the window all the way up and leans half way out, “Oh! I’ll just come to y-“ “NO!” He stops, one leg out the window one arm on the window and one hand supporting him on the roof.
* “IM TRYING TO SERENADE YOU SO JUST STAY STILL FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES.” He complied and pouted.
* Honestly? That’s how you confessed to him, that you love him. Becaus he asked you to be his girlfriend, but neither of you had said “I love you.”
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“LETS GOOOOOOO!” You screamed from the stands, you watched the practice game between Nekoma and Fukurodani, Your boys had taken the first set, Nekoma the second, and the third set had been lasting way to long, but still almost tied. It went bad when Bokuto missed the perfect chance to spike and got blocked.
“Kuroo.” You hissed as the whistle blew. You watched Bokuto walk off the court not looking at anyone or anything, just walking. You looked around and quickly rushed to go find Bokuto. You passed Akaashi and told him you’d take care of Bokuto, he nodded and let you go. It took a while but you found him, outside the gym, staring at the ground, he was squatting, his Jersey pulled over his head, his hair still visibly sad. He was pouting, and just staring at the ground. You squatted next to him, struggling a bit and handing him a water bottle, you held it out, he turned his head the other way, “I don’t deserve it.”
“Bo,” you said and nudged him, “You do, so take it.”
“No, I-“ you cut him off by squeezing the bottle and squirting him.
“Come on,” you stood up and offered a hand, “Seeing you sad makes me sad, let’s go him so at least then we have a blanket to drown out sorrows in.” He huffed and looked away again, water dripping down his face before he huffed and stood up, “I’m choosing a movie.” He grumbled, you smiled and nodded, “Okay.”
The walk him was abnormally quiet, no jokes from either side, just silence, hands held tight, a few sniffles, whispered words of consolation, until you found yourself at Bokuto’s house. He led you in, up to his room and walked into his bathroom to change. You were wearing leggings, and a tank top, over that you had Bokuto’s jacket. Not his home jacket with team colors but his away jacket that was plain white. You pulled it off and threw it on his chair and kicked off your sneakers and got under the blanket trying to pre heat the bed. He came back and you handed him the remotes you’d opened Netflix and it was him who would choose so you just waited idly. He got in bed behind you facing the tv, one arm under your waist holding you the other over you with the remote trying to find something to watch. He settled for the movie A Silent Voice, you’d learned after all this time, he actually likes Slice of Life, romance type of things which surprised you, and onto you because he made you SWEAR not to tell anyone. To this day, you’ve held firm on that swear. At some point Bokuto started to cry talking about how he was so mean to to her, and she didn’t deserve to be bullied, and then started crying when he found out he fell in love with her. You turned in his arms and just hugged his chest telling him everything is okay. They have each other now, and he only sniffled and your heart broke a bit, the game really must have hurt him, he hardly cries this hard at these things.
“Bokuto?” You asked bringing a hand up to brush a few loose strands back up to where they belong.
“Hm?” He hummed looking down at you and then back to the tv when he realized you were looking at him.
“You know I’m here for you right? Good, bad, win or loss, I’m here for you and I always will be, even when you don’t want me to, I’m going to be by your side, and I Akaashi is to. So please don’t be sad? We care about you, and it hurts to see you sad.”
“Don’t worry about me,” he smiled at you and squeezed you to his chest and placed a quick kiss on your head, “I have you.” You still head a bit of sadness in his voice, but you wouldn’t push it. So you hugged his chest and nodded against him, “Remember it? Okay?”
He nodded “I will,” as he started the next movie. During the first thirty minutes he’d talked about a movie scene where someone scent a band to play outside the window of the person they loved, and then confessed to them. He looked so happy as it played, during that time you’d planned what you were going to do. You got up and told him you had to pee, to engraved in the movie he just nodded, “okay.”
So you rushed to his living room, took his wireless speaker, and found a simple soft version of the song you’d been looking for. “I’m about serenade the sadness right out of you.” Talking to your self, you tried so hard to quietly leave the house, with success you picked a few random flowers you found growing between bushes and picked up some pebbles.
Click.....nothing... click..... nothing, click click..... you saw movement and get ready to push play.
He opened his window and looked around and you waved your arms and he looked at you, before saying, “Why are you outside? It’s dark? Come in side.”
“Bokuto I-“ he cut you off “Oh! I’ll come to you!” The first story of the house wasn’t high, in fact you two often walked in the roof and layer on it to look at the stars. So it was no surprise when he started crawling out the window, one leg out, the other holding the window sill to pull himself out, he stopped when you screamed, “BOKUTO NO! Just stay there for five minutes!”
He immediately pouted but stood there pulling his leg back in. “I know you’ve been sad and don’t like being alone but just let me do this.” He didn’t look at you directly now entering emo mode.
You sighed with a smile and turned up the volume and started.
“You with the sad eyes Don't be discouraged,” He peeked at you, his arms still crossed over his chest, you took a breath to build up confidence,
“Oh I realize It's hard to take courage In a world full of people You can lose sight of it all The darkness inside you Can make you feel so small.”
He turned to look at you completely and honestly you were getting teary eyed, and you got the feeling he was too.
“Show me a smile then Don't be unhappy,” his lips started to quiver as he tried to smile,
“Can't remember when I last saw you laughing This world makes you crazy And you've taken all you can bear Just call me up ‘Cause I will always be there”
He trying to smile but the tears that start falling make you worry.
“And I see your true colors Shining through” he gripped the window sill tight and smiled big, eyes closed and tears falling,
“I see your true colors And that's why I love you.”
Everything went silent, the pause in this song was timed perfectly, his eyes widened at he looked at you tears on his face, and smiled still wide, so you said it, “I love you Bokuto.” He started wailing and rubbing his face with his fire arm and you smiled and let out a laugh before starting again.
You finish cutting the song halfway since the rest was repetition.
“So don't be afraid to let them show Your true colors True colors are beautiful
I see your true colors Shining through I see your true colors
And that's why I love you So don't be afraid to let them show Your true colors
True colors are beautiful Like a rainbow”
By the time you finished to catch your breath, he was willing crawling out the window screaming “I LOVE YOU! I love you! I LOVE you y/n!” He’s jumping o the roof screaming about how he loves you and you start to worry he might fall, but instead he walked it the edge and sat on it and tried to wiggle as far as he could before he jumped off and ran to you. You stopped him and handed him the small wild flowers you’d picked and he was ecstatic all over agin.
“I love you Bo,” you said as you squeezed him back trying to with as much force he was using on you, “I love you y/n.”
He pulled back and smiled down at you, you smiled up at him and he went for it, to him it was probably going to be the second sweetest kiss he’ll ever get from your the first still hasn’t happened yet.
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