#god i can’t believe i have to work on my essay now. i really did myself this way

[chaos0pikachu]

tldr: bitches want gay shit, not het shit, with data and numbers to back it up; bonus Bible’s booty

so thinking about @discluded​‘s essay on Mile and Apo’s upcoming historical drama, and Thailand’s bid for soft power got my brain thinking thoughts. I’ve talked about Thailand noticing the soft power of their BL media before along with why I think Chinese, South Korean, and other East Asian media (from television to novels, etc) are popping off in popularity in the last 5 years or so. Idk where those posts are and I’m to lazy to link them thus is life

The point! The point is tho reading discluded’s post made me think about F4 Thailand. Ironic, I know, since F4 is a het drama based off Boys Over Flowers a shojo manga from Japan that was released in 1992 and ended serialization in 2008. 

Firstly, Boys Over Flowers FACINATES me b/c the god damn chokehold this series has on various Asian countries. I told a friend it’s comparable to like, Romeo and Juliet, in that it’s been adapted, remade, re-adapted, re-booted, re-imagined, and so on over and over and over again. Like there’s audio dramas, there’s films, there’s multiple live action TV shows, there’s an anime. Japan’s made two feature films, and two seasons of a TV. Taiwan had two seasons of a TV show, Korea had a tv show, China had two versions of the same show (one was a remake), Indonesia had two tv shows, India had a tv show, and finally Thailand was the latest to adapt it into a TV show in 2021 - 2022. The legacy of this story can’t be denied. 

Now, my point? Okay so my point is I witnessed online the marketing for F4 Thailand in real time. It was interesting to me b/c I very rarely - and have not since - seen a ton of talk about a Thai drama that wasn’t BL or a horror or action film. 

When it comes to the Thai film industry, the three genres I see discussed are: BL, Action, Horror. You can see this in what Netflix (America) offers in regards to Thai series specifically what ones they dub which shows like: Girl From Nowhere (which Netflix invested in a s2 and is a thriller/horror drama), The Whole Truth (a horror film), and Thai Cave Rescue (which they also have a documentary based on). Netflix is still (STUPIDLY) reluctant to purchase a license for any SK or Thai BL content (I know Semantic Error would blow the FUCK up on Netflix you idiots!!!) probably b/c investors are like, hmmmm but would gays of color sell? I would say they also have Your Name Engraved Herein but that’s an easier sell b/c its a drama and has more of that classic gay Oscars vibe (this isn’t an inherent bad thing don’t come for me). 

Okay back to my point I s2g I have one. 

So marketing for F4 Thailand was interesting b/c I actually saw it. I don’t see marketing cross over into my international waters for Thai het dramas. What helped this, and I fully believe this was done purposely, is the casting of Bright and Win who gained international popularity from 2Gether. Like, it seemed pretty obvious to me that casting Bright and Win was a bid to peak the interest of the international market, combined with casting them specifically in an adaption of one of the most famous and well known Asian romantic dramas of the last 30 years or so. This show was set-up to be A Hit. 

But I don’t think it really worked internationally; bare with me, numbers time. 

Now, ratings for F4 averaged at .441% on Thai TV, higher than Bad Buddy (which aired on the same network) which averaged at .121% and Kinnporsche which averaged at .314%. 

I compared F4 to these two shows specifically b/c they aired in a similar timeframe (all three shows aired over the course of 2021 - 2022 except KP which only aired in 2022) and arguably Bad Buddy and Kinnporsche were the biggest BL shows in Thailand in those respective years. 

F4 also did well in the Philippines, and ended up dubbed into Filipino, and it’s scheduled for re-broadcast in 2023. Honestly, it’s difficult to see how well F4 did internationally as there’s not a ton of information available on it. When I google “F4 Thailand reception” there’s not a lot of results, if I google “boys over flowers Thailand reception” I get this: 

ngl I think it’s pretty funny that one of the top four most asked questions is if F4 is BL and again, it’s def b/c of Bright and Win’s casting. But given that there’s not a ton of information available, I glean that F4 didn’t do great in the western (American/Latin American/European) market. Not to say it didn’t do well. 

On Google ratings: F4 Thailand lands at a 4.9 rating with 2619 reviews/ratings and Bad Buddy stands at a 5.0 with 1085 reviews/ratings

On MyDramaList F4 has a rating of 8.5/10 from 11,982 users, and Bad Buddy has a 8.5/10 from 26,445 users

On IMDb: F4 has a rating of 7.8/10 from 2.3k users, and Bad Buddy has 8.8/10 rating from 5k users

This isn’t a comparison about quality, but activity. I’m not here to make judgements on either shows quality, but rather international impact and relevancy. Outside of Google, Bad Buddy has more active users who left a rating or review on the website than F4, almost double in fact. 

If you go to GMMTV’s official Youtube page and look at the most popular videos on the channel it’s majority....2Gether. Like my god so much 2Gether the CHOKEHOLD this show had on y’all:

More date and a comparison of F4 and Bad Buddy’s international numbers below, we’re getting into the meat now. 

Now the actual F4 official trailer has 3.7 million views on GMMTV’s channel. Bad Buddy official trailer, also on GMMTV’s official channel, has 2.7 million views. Both are set at 1 year ago so they’re within the same or similar time frames for comparison. 

To throw in there, the Kinnporsche official trailer was released 10 months ago and has clocked 7.1 million views total on Be On Cloud’s official channel. To keep up with the comparison, F4′s OST Who Am I clocked 21 million views at 1 year, while KP/Jeff Satur’s OST Why Don’t You Stay has clocked 36 million views at 8 months. 

(completely unrelated sidenote but Vegas/Bible’s ass has 3.4 million views and I just find that fucking hilarious, the man’s booty got more youtube views than other studios episodes. The power of Bible booty) 

You can watch episode 1 of F4 on GMMTV’s official youtube channel, but only episode 1 the rest are just previews for other episodes. Idk why, other series whether het or BL they have all the episodes available. There’s apparently 80 videos that are hidden, I’m wondering if you have to pay Youtube premium to access those. Since I only have episode 1 to compare, for comparisons sake, we can look at those numbers of F4′s ep01 and Bad Buddy’s, both of which are clocked at 1 year each, are as follows:

Bad Buddy ep01 [1/4]: 9.6 million

Bad Buddy ep01 [2/4]: 5.4 million 

Bad Buddy ep01 [3/4]: 4.9 million

Bad Buddy ep01 [4/4]: 5 million

F4 Thailand Begins ep01 [1/4]: 1.7 million

F4 Thailand Begins ep01 [2/4]: 848k 

F4 Thailand Begins ep01 [3/4]: 3.3 million 

F4 Thailand Begins ep01 [4/4]: 747k 

If you crunch these numbers, Bad Buddy’s total view count for episode 1 is around 25 million views. F4′s total view count is around 7 million views (if I’m doing my math correctly a bitch doesn’t work in maths). 

Now, I don’t know what the premiere numbers for either of these series was. BUT, this shows that one series, Bad Buddy, has legs and the other, F4, didn’t. 

Either way that’s a pretty sizable gap and a lot of international fans use Youtube as a means to legally watch and support these shows as shown in the availability of subtitles.

F4 has subtitle options in: English, Korean, Chinese (Taiwan), Portuguese, Turkish and Spanish

Bad Buddy has subtitle options in: English, Turkish, French, Indonesian, Spanish, Chinese (Hong Kong), Korean, Chinese (Taiwan), Vietnamese, Arabic, Portuguese, Polish, Italian, Burmese, Chinese (Simplified) and Bulgarian.

Bro, BULGARIAN.

As far as I can tell, IQIYI doesn’t release streaming data that I could find, so idk what the numbers are for Kinnporsche. I do know that Kinnporsche, since airing, has never let the sites Top 10 list which is an impressive feat after ending months ago. 

So like, what does all this information mean~ exactly? Am I saying F4 Thailand was a flop? No, not even a little bit lol I don’t have enough data to really say definitively F4 was a flop nor is that really the point here. 

The point here is about international impact, and the fact that in my humble ass opinion, Thailand’s het shows ain’t hitting internationally all THAT much. Not as much as their BL shows are and have been. 

Objectively, going by Thai ratings, F4 did a lot better than Bad Buddy, but internationally? Internationally there’s a pretty visible gap from everything I’ve seen. 

I think what GMMTV was hoping was by casting Bright and Win they’re pull in that international audience they had cultivated with the 2gether series. But het dramas are high key a dime a dozen in American/European/Latin American audiences. Folks go to Kdramas or Cdramas for het dramas (and I have theories on why those hit, namely Cdramas for the high fantasy aspects that Europe and America doesn’t deliver on and kdramas for being unashamedly high quality produced romances. Also the one-and-done factor). 

Given the juggernaut success of Kinnporsche, not just in the west but also in other Asian countries I imagine that’ll influence other studios to try to follow suit even more to gain even a half-slice of that visibility and profitability. Kinnporsche, imo, is an outlier, it’s success is sorta like 2gether and TharnType in that there were a lot of factors outside of the show itself that led to it’s individual success. 

Like, flat, argue with the wall, 2gether is NOT a good series. But, it was released right when lockdown began (literally, ep01 aired Feb 21, 2020), in a way 2gether was like Animal Crossing, GMMTV didn’t expect it to do THAT well especially internationally but it did partially b/c what the fuck else we people gonna do in lockdown? Watch a simple but cute gay romcom which there was a gap for - Love, Victor wouldn’t air it’s first episode until June 17th, 2020, and that was marketed less as a queer romcom and more as a queer coming of age story. There’s also the factor of The Untamed having ended - final episode August 20th, 2019 - and folks catching on to the growing and active existence of international queer media that wasn’t boxed in and tied down by American conventions. 

I think what we’re going to see is the “next era” of BL. We saw the uptick in overall content post 2019/2020 with the success of 2Gether and TharnType, following the success of series like Why R U, Love By Chance, 1000 Stars, Lovely Writer, etc along with other countries getting in more on the game (namely South Korea) and the overall uptick in the amount of BL (and now GL!) shows across the board. 

After 2gether we saw more BL shows, I think after Kinnporsche we’re going to see higher quality BL/GL shows. And I think we’re already seeing that. Semantic Error was a nice change of pace for SK b/c it was longer than 15mins, I think going forward given the success of SE we’re going to see SK branch out slowly into developing longer shows (no longer than 30 to 35mins tho to keep costs down) and better workshopping (some kisses in KBLs...my guys). While for Thailand I think we’re gonna see better quality shows. Not Me dropped the ball in some regards but visually the show was great. Cutie Pie’s story was incoherent sure but visually? Hot damn that was a good looking show. We’re also getting more interesting concepts out of Thailand too; like that Prince/bodyguard show coming out, the fact Kinnporsche did eventually get made and MileApo’s upcoming historical film. 

this all got away from me but whatever, bitches want gay shit, peace

#mileapo #kinnporsche #tharntype #thai bl #bad buddy #idk what else to tag this as #here ya go here are thoughts y'all #chaos pikachu talks to damn much #chaos pikachu metas

[mooseyspooky]

Moz Solo was already on it @lovely-lady-fox! FamousWhenDead posted the whole thing:

Johnny Marr: How could Meryl Streep agree to be in Mamma Mia?

The guitarist lets us into his cultural life, from his love of David Hockney to making his friends watch a Joan Didion documentary

My favourite piece of music For a long time now, it’s been My Goal’s Beyond by John McLaughlin. Like his work with the Mahavishnu Orchestra, it is in a genre entirely of its own. It’s unquantifiable and makes me feel a certain way, no matter what happens in the outside world.

The lyric I wish I’d written “You’re going to reap just what you sow”, from Perfect Day by Lou Reed.

The instrument I wish I’d learnt Piano. I can play it, but only in amateurish fashion. I should say though there are guitar players who play the piano nicely like Neil Young, Paul McCartney and David Bowie. They play it as a means to an end and do wonderful things with it. But I would like to be a few levels up from there.

The music that cheers me up Any good pop music, which by definition usually means contemporary. There are things from my past that of course make me feel good. But there’s something about hearing music that’s fresh, upbeat and represents the modern world — it makes you feel that everything is OK.

I’m having a fantasy dinner party, I’ll invite these artists and authors Gary Oldman, Muhammad Ali and certainly Marilyn Monroe.

And I’ll put on this music Spirit Power: The Best of Johnny Marr.

Overrated I don’t tend to like shitting on people, but Mamma Mia!, for God’s sake, or We Will Rock You or any of those sorts of musicals. How did it get to that? We’re supposed to go along with the idea that they’re good. What was Meryl Streep thinking she was doing starring in that film, and Julie Walters? What were they thinking? There are a lot of things culturally that we’ve just gone along with and they really must stop.

Underrated

Blindboy Boatclub, the artist and musician from Limerick, is best known as one half of the Irish comedy hip-hop group the Rubberbandits. He’s amazing, has such an interesting way of thinking and also hosts the brilliant series The Blindboy Podcast too. One of the best books I have ever read is his Topographia Hibernica. I can’t recommend him or it enough.

My favourite author

Aldous Huxley. People would assume I’m thinking about Brave New World orThe Doors of Perception, but I’m actually referring to his work after he moved to the United States in the second half of his life. His essays and lectures are even better than his earlier work. I rediscovered him in the Nineties and he is my actual hero. Everything you read of his is an education.

The book I’m reading

Autobiography of Red by Anne Carson. It’s a trip, moving around from style to style. The novel is loosely based on Greek mythology, but set in modern times. It’s relatable and super interesting. PJ Harvey introduced me to Carson, an intriguing cross between an essayist and a poet.

The book I couldn’t finish

The Perennial Philosophy by Aldous Huxley. Just couldn’t do it.

The book I’m ashamed I haven’t read Ulysses by James Joyce. It just sounds so hard going. I love the idea of it and feel genuinely bad that I haven’t read it, but I do also feel like I know so much about it already. I admire it enough, without feeling the need to put myself through the hassle of reading it.

My favourite film Sergio Leone’s film Once Upon a Time in America. When it was first released, I went to see it a few times and decided then it was the best thing I’d ever seen. I recently saw The End We Start From, starring Jodie Comer. It’s so good. Amazingly, I came away from it with this feeling of triumph of the human spirit. It says a lot about what it means to be human and what we fundamentally need, which is compassion, connection, love and understanding. And Comer is just so believable in the role.

The box set I’m hooked on I’m rewatching Nurse Jackie. There’s so much good stuff out there that whenever I occasionally revisit old, great stuff, you forget how much it stands up. I like anything Edie Falco is in. I also have just rewatched the documentary Joan Didion: The Center Will Not Hold. I’ve watched it at least three times and whenever someone comes to my place that hasn’t watched it, I watch it with them.

My favourite TV series It has to be Mad Men. One of my friends is eagle-eyed and noticed that when they put an album on a turntable, it has the correct label from the Sixties. That’s crazy.

The film I walked out on

There are loads, often stuff I take my kids to see and they don’t even notice I’d left. I didn’t enjoy Baby Driver — I didn’t like the music in that at all.

I wasted an evening watching Manchester City play in the Champions League final in 2021.

The last movie that made me cry These days I can cry at almost anything so I can’t remember.

The place I feel happiest Running around Brooklyn, over the Williamsburg Bridge. Or around Portland, Oregon. Whenever I’m at those places, I always run unless I’m injured. I’ve done a lot of things in my life, but nothing quite beats that.

My guiltiest cultural pleasure Cheese and onion pasty, chips and peas. Anybody who says that’s not a culture doesn’t know what they are talking about.

If I could own one painting it would be We Two Boys Together Clinging by David Hockney. Any of his work would be a dream to own. Even the iPad stuff is beautiful. I went to see David Hockney: Bigger and Closer at the Lightroom and it was great.

FamousWhenDead's post of the article

#johnny marr #These days i can cry at almost anything my God johnny just rip my heart out gosh #Sweet soft boy just out here being a part time Philosophy major

[unamused-boss]

Boots and Trumpets

Robin Buckley x Hargrove Oc

Warning, Strong topics: homophobia, child abandonment, troubled sibling relationship, child abuse, underage drinking, Homophobic language, strong language

I will not tolerate any negativity in the comments regarding sexuality or religion!

Summary: Amelia is now facing new challenges within Hawkins. One being her having the miss her friend Tina's annual Halloween party. So to counter for what she thought would be a boring night, she stopped by a little birdie's house instead.

I are currently sitting inside your shared ride with Nancy Wheeler and Steve Harrington. I had the pleasure to have the whole back seat to myself, with my boots propped up onto the window opposite of your head. My baggy washed out jeans hanging from my ankles with my golden colored sweater tucked into my jeans with a brown belt.

“Steve, the more you complain about it and not work on it the more it’s going to suck.” I said to him after hearing him complain about his college essay for the past fifteen minutes.

“It’s not bad Steve, it just needs some rearranging.” Nancy reassured. “You just have to…” Nancy went onto this thing about how he can fix it but I truly did not care. They went onto something else about some dinner that they had to go to. Everything came to a halt when a roar of an engine stopped every word that was about to be exchanged. Both Nancy and Steve stepped out of the car to have a look at the noise while I only peered out of the window. We all saw a charged blue Camaro drive by us and parked. Our eyes still followed to see who owned it. My eyes made contact with the California plate on the back of it.

“What are the odds..” I laughed, I’m kinda happy another Cali kid is here. Maybe I can make a new friend. Two people got out of the car, a dude wearing denim on denim with curly hair styled into a mullet and a twelve year old with red hair with a skateboard. They both looked familiar. But then I saw it, it was the missing earring to my set that I had when I left in California. I thought it fell out when I was packing my bags.

“No fucking way…” I said in shock. ‘Out of every town in this country, you just had to show up here…’

“Shit.”

You gotta be fucking kidding me. Out of every damn state that those asswhips could pick. They pick my state. Indi-fucking-ana. I can’t handle this. I'm gonna throw up. I don’t have the energy to go find a new place to live. I can’t let any of them see me. I can’t live through this. This has to be some sort of nightmare. A really bad nightmare. God I didn’t change my last name either. Everyone is going to know. He’s going to figure it out and I’ll be thrown in front of a flippin bus. What am I going to do?

“Hey!” An all to perky Tina jumped up at me while I was at my locker. “How are you Amy?”

God, here it begins.

“What’s up…” My voice sounds frazzled, get it together. “I’m fine. What do you need?”

“Well as you know by now there is a new hot topic on campus.” Tina grinned.

“Yeahh.” I answered clearly to most with no enthusiasm, but not to Tina. “What does he have to do with me?”

“Well. I was hoping you could hook me up with your cousin!”

“Cousin? No he is not my cousin, we are no were near related.”

“Really?” She seemed not to believe me. “You guys just look really similar, I mean if you never took your sunglasses off I’d think you were him.” She obviously meant it as a joke. I can tell by the light giggle that she gave after making her comment.

“Well we’re not so I can’t help you there.” I stated blankly to her. “Hope you’re able to get in his pants.” I tried to end the conversation there but I was stopped.

“Hey wait!” I turned back to face Tina, who had pulled out an orange slip of paper. “Here you're invited, hope you can make it.” She said before skipping away to her next class. I looked down at the flier to see ‘ Let’s get sheet faced’ printed in bold on it. I laugh a bit at the play on words before folding it and putting it in my pocket. ‘I am skipping school today’ I made my way to the back exit of the school when a light force knocked me a few steps back.

“Oh my god! I am so sorry, that was completely my fault. Please don’t yell at me, I’m just trying to get to chem.” A familiar frantic voice called out to me. Robin Buckley.

“Robin, it’s okay.” I reassured her.

“Are you sure? Cause listen if that scary dude is related to you please don’t send him my way.” She begged. 

I huffed. “I’m not related to him, Robin, don’t worry. I’m playing hooky, I’ll catch ya later… hopefully?” I say. I start walking past her to the free world from Hawkins High School

“Yeah, to-totally.” The faint voice of Robin can be heard from the closing doors.

…

Halloween Night: Friday 31, 1984

“Listen Tina, I can’t make it.” I told the bummed girl over that phone. “I’m sorry, I’ll come to the next party you throw.” I reassured her.

“But why are you flaking out on the Halloween bash! You never miss this specific party in the few years that I have known you.” That is true. Once you went to Tina’s annual halloween party you’ve never missed it. But that is changing this year. Being that your twin brother and step sister now live here, there is going to be a lot more flaking then just at the halloween party.

“Tina I told you, I’m taking Will trick or treating with his friends tonight.” You told her once again. “We can do a sleepover some time next week… okay.” 

“Okay.” I heard her sigh, “I see ya around.”

“See ya later Tina.” I hung up the yellow landline. I walk over to the livingroom to see Will fixing his ghostbusters costume.

“I still can’t believe no one else dressed up this year.” Will said sadly, “Everyone dressed up last year.”

“It’s okay Will, they just think they're too cool to dress up.” I reassured the small kid. In the back you can hear Bob explaining to Johnathan how the camera works when Joyce came behind Will with his, whatever it is, backpack for his costume.

“Listen, stay close to your brother and Amy, and you get a bad feeling just tell them so you can come straight home.” Joyce told him. “You promise.” Will gave her a thumbs up. “Okay.”

“You ready to rock and roll, Will the wise.” I smiled down at him.

“Be safe.” Joyce shouted out to us, mainly to Will. We all got into the car. Jonathan driving, Will in the passenger seat, and with me in the back. We start to make our way over to Mike’s neighborhood. 

“I just don’t get what she sees in him.” Jonathan says all of a sudden.

“What?” Will answered in utter confusion.

“Bob.”

“At least he doesn’t treat me differently.” Will said. “I can’t even go trick or treating by myself. It’s lame.”

“What, you think me and Johnathan are lame?” I said, trying to lighten his mood. 

“No, but it’s not like Nancy is coming to watch over Mike. You know?” Jonathan just sighs. He looks at me from the mirror. I give him the same look. We both feel bad for the kid, but what are we gonna do? I don’t want anything to happen to Will. Sooner than later we are at Mike’s front yard. Will makes his way to get out till Johnathan stops him.

“Hey.” Jonathan says to Will.

“Yeah.” He answers.

“If I let you go by yourself, will you promise to stay in the neighborhood.” Johnathan suggested. 

“Yeah.” Will’s mood brightened up. “Yeah-Yeah, totally.”

“And be back at Mike’s by 9:00.” Jonathan told him.

“9:30?” Will tried to persuade him. “9:00.” Jonathan said again.”Deal?” “Yeah deal.” Will rushes out of the car to go to his friends.

“Will.” Jonathan stops him from leaving the car to hand him the camera. “Don’t let any of your spazzy friends touch this.” Will laughed and took the camera to go over to his friends. 

“You’re a good brother John.” I smiled at him. “I’ll see ya later.” As is tried to get out of the car but Jonathan stopped me.

“Wait where are you going?” 

“I don't know, I’ll probably walk around the neighborhood.” I said. “I got a friend down that street.”

“You’re really not going to Tina’s party?” He was bewildered by this. 

“Yeah John, I’m really not going.”

“But you love Tina’s parties.” He simply stated.

“Well I’m not feeling it this year.” I told him.

“Bullshit.” He called. “Why aren’t you going?”

“I just don’t want to go.” I’m sticking to this. “I have someone I can hang out with, plus I’ll be close to Will if something happens.” John and I just stare at each other for a minute.

“Okay.” He sighed. “But if Nancy gets upset that you’re not there, I’m not taking the heat.”

“Okay.” I smiled at him as I got out of the car. I walked my way over to where the boys were messing around as John left for Tina's party. “Okay turd-nuggets.” I begin.

“Really, what are you twelve?” Mike sassed. 

“And are you a lollipop with that stick up your ass?” I sassed back to him, I start back up were I was interrupted. “I will be down that street with a friend, I will be back her at 8:45 to make sure you guys are fine. Okay?”

A chorus of “Okay’s” filled the air.

“Great! See you shit-heads later.” I walk off a familiar bird’s house. I walk up the stairs to the front door and give it a quick knock. I wait until the door opens. 

“Amelia?” Robin says confused. “What are you doing here?”

“ I was hoping we could hang out for a bit.” I suggested. “Is that okay?”

“Oh! It’s completely fine!” She exclaimed, “I just thought you'd be at some party.”

“I didn’t feel like partying tonight, ya know.” I made my way into her house.

…

Tina’s Halloween Party: Friday 31, 1984

The party was in full swing. TP covering the lights of every room. Alcohol filling the mouths and noses of every teenager on the property. Music blasting as loud as physically possible. Someone throwing up in the front yard. The smell of weed coming from the master bedroom with each new blunt that was lit. The sound of a name being chanted in the backyard. A keg stand can be seen with an all too familiar blonde on top, like always. 

“Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy! Billy!” Is chanting through the crowd as the new keg king came down from his stand. Spitting out that remaining beer from his mouth.

“That’s how you do it Hawkins! That’s how you do it!” Billy yelled. The statement “We have a new keg king, ladies and gentleman!” Being shouted along as Billy made his way into the house. His senses are filled with the atmosphere of the room. Till he sees a certain fallen king with his princess. 

“Got ourselves a new keg king Harrington.” Tommy boasted.

“Yeah, eat it Harrington!”  Steve looked onto the, now new, keg king. Waiting for something to happen.

“What’s wrong Harrington? Your little dyke is not here to save you.” Tommy fake whined to him. As a way to taunt him. Tommy was about to keep laughing when he felt beer splash over his shoulder. “What the? What the hell Tina?!”

“Don’t call her that!” Tina shouted at him “If she was here she’d leave you crying.”, too drunk to keep dealing with him but still wanting to defend her friend. Nancy, now done with the testerone in front of her, quickly left to get something stronger to drink. Tommy is now pissed that he is covered in pungent drink. 

“Go worry about yourself before you come at me guys.” Was all Steve said then walking away from the other teenage boys. Staring off at the brunette as he went after his girlfriend.

Billy turned himself around to face Tommy. “How were you talking about that got Tina mad?” He asked, genuinely curious about the lesbian that was not present tonight at the party of the semester.

“Oh. Just some lesbo that hangs with Harrington.” Tommy retorted, making it seem like she isn’t worth Billy’s time. “She can be a fucking asshole.”

…

Laughter filled the Buckley house this Halloween. The two girls conversed with one another for the past few hours. Being comfortable with one another knowing how the other truly is.

“Wait.” Robin kept laughing. “You got caught kissing Heather Halloway from her bedroom window then proceeded to fall from the second story?!”

“Yeaah, I’m not welcomed over at the Holloway house any more.” I giggled.  

“Jeez, you’ve done more than I thought.” Robin smiled. “I’m still scared to change in the girls locker room.”

“Hey I’m the town lesbo.” I calmly giggled. 

We fell into comfortable silence, “Hey, I wanna ask you something?” Robin asked.

“Sure.” I said, waiting for her question.

“What was California like?” I sat silent for a second. Due to my silence Robin thought she had hit a nerve. “If you don’t want to talk about it you don’t have to!”

“It’s okay, I just haven't talked with anyone about California.” I reassured her. “ It was like a constant sunset everyday…” I started.

“The weather was always perfect. And the beaches, oh my god the beaches. They were always clear. I lived in Santa Monica, very touristy but beautiful.” I was happy I could finally talk about my home again. “Ugh that sand was so soft under your toes when you walked. And there was this boardwalk that my mom took me and my brother to all that time-” 

“You have a brother?” Robin asked curiously.I stopped. ‘No I messed up’.

“Yeah.” I frowned.

“Do- Do you miss him?” Robin asked.

“Everyday… but I hope he’s living the California dream as you guys would say.” I covered my truth with a lie. Not wanting her to know that my brother is here in Hawkins. 

“Well from how to describe California, it sounds beautiful.” She reassured me.

I stared back at her with a smile. “Thanks Robin.” Silence filled the room again. Comfortable silence. I liked being around Robin, even with her nervous attitude, she was truly one of a kind. I was about to say something when I glanced at the clock of the wall to find it was close to the time I told the boys I would meet them.

“I gotta go.” I sighed disappointedly, “But I’d love to spend more time together.” I am hoping her answer is a yes.

“Yeah, I would love that! Well not like love-love, but do love being around you. Not in like a couple ways cause that would be weird since we’re just friends. Yaaa know.” She panicked.

“I know Rob.” I smirked, “I’ll see you at school later.” 

As we said our goodbyes, I made my way down the street to see the boys. I saw the familiar ghostbuster’s suits from where I was. I could tell that they picked someone up along the way to go trick or treating with. ‘How cute, they made a new friend’. There were two stragglers in the back of the group, by the hair cuts I could tell that it was Mike and Will. I did a small jog over to them.

“Hey shit-heads!” I yelled to them, all their heads slowly turning to me as I made my way over to them. “Did you guys get anything good?”

“What Amy, why are you here?” Mike complained.

“Cause it is close to 9:00 and I want to check on you guys, is that so bad?”

“Yes.” He answered.

“Okay you know what, you're a little shit.” I said to him, “Besides who’s your new?... friend…”

Fuck.

It appears that we have the same looks on our faces. I stared at Max. She stared back at me.

“Shit…” I accidently said out loud.

“Do you know Max, Amy?” Lucas asked me.

I took a deep breath in. “No.” I said simply. “Listen, hit up a few more houses, I’ll come get you in a minute.”

“Where are you-” Dustin started.

“I need a minute guys!” I shouted at them, walking over to Mike’s front yard. Dammit, why. Why! The last person I want to see is with the kids I watch. Shit. This is bad. She can’t tell Niel. No, she can’t tell Billy. Would they even believe her if she told them? Shit, what do I do? I was taken out of my head when a very upset Mike walked by me. I was about to ask him if he was okay when I heard a commotion in the street. I look over to see Will being picked on by some older boys.

“Hey! What the hell are you doing!” I shout at them as I run over to them. “Get back here you fuck heads!” They ran away the minute I had my eyes set on them. Will was pushed to the ground, dropping his candy and camera. I kneel down to him, “Hey Will, are you okay?” I calmly asked him. “Did they hurt you?” I kept asking. Will was not responding what so ever. He just kept looking up at the sky, like something was looking at him. “Will?... Will!” He started to get up slowly, still not answering me. He started to move slowly. Till he ran straight to the back of Mike’s house. “Will!” I shouted after him, grabbing his candy and camera. The other apparently heard me since I heard multiple pairs of feet behind me. I made my way down some brick stairs to find Mike with Will hiding behind a wall.

“Will! I couldn’t find you.” Mike panicked with worry. “I heard Amy shouting then I couldn’t find you, are you hurt?” Due to Will’s heavy breathing I could tell what was up.

“Holy shit!” Dustin yelled. 

I kneeled down to his level looking him in the eyes. “Did you have another episode Will?” He was still looking around like a scared cat. “I’m gonna get you home, okay buddy.”  Mike made his way to help Will up. When others tried to help he called them off. Blocking off the rest of us to take Will with him.

“Mike?” Dustin tried.

“Keep trick or treating, I’m bored anyways.” He started taking Will with him.

“What’s wrong with him?” Max asked, looking to us for an answer. The boys and I were silent, nothing to say.

“It’s something you don’t have to worry about.” I told her. “Dustin, Lucas go up there for a minute. I need to talk with her.”

“What! Why?” They both started to complain.

“I don’t want to hear it. Go!” I hardly ever get stern with them, but when I do I hope they know I mean what I say. They both, begrudgingly, made their way up the stairs. I turn myself back to Max.

“Max.”

“Amelia.”

“I go by Amy now…” Well this is awkward.

“What did you want?” She asked me, quit literally over me already.

“You can’t tell Billy I’m here or anyone.” I told her.

“What? Why not?” She was baffled. “Do you not know how much Billy misses you?”

“No Max I don’t, because I’ve been here for the past 4 years.” I stated. “Just please don’t tell him, and don’t tell anyone that we’re related. Got that.”

“Yes.”

“Good. As far as me and you go, we just met. Okay?”

“Okay.” She said a bit quietly. “Now let’s get you back up there with your friends so you can enjoy the rest of the night.” I take her back up to Dustin and Lucas. And since Johnathan isn’t here by 9:00, looks like I’m stuck here.

Jeez, the next month is gonna be a shit show. Max knows I’m here now. Johnathan is nowhere in sight. On top of that my twin brother is here too. Hopefully this can’t get any worse than it already is.

Man. I was so wrong about that…

Hello! I hope you enjoyed this part of the story! Also so sorry for my absents, I know you guys are wanting fics/stories. All I ask is that you be patient with me, thank you. If you have any kind of feed back I would love to hear it. And please tell me what you think of Robin and Amelia's interactions together.

I always love good feedback!

Thank you for reading and have a great Christmas!

@meowiemari

@b1tchy3lf

#billy hargrove #stranger things #robin buckely #robin buckley x female reader #fanfiction #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #max mayfield #will byres #william hargrove #joyce byers #lesbian #oc character #stranger thing fic #stranger things oc #mike wheeler #johnathan byers #eleven hopper #jim hopper #hawkins #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley fanfic #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargove imagine #eddie munson #netflix stranger things #robin buckley imagine

[showtoonzfan]

My thoughts on the upcoming Disney brand sequel movies:

Zootopia 2: Hell yes, this is one of those Disney movies I believed actually DESERVES a sequel, unlike movies like Wreck it Ralph 2, The Incredibles 2, or Toy Story 4, because I actually thought the originals had decent or satisfying conclusions and we didn’t need more. However Zootopia is one of my favorite modern Disney movies, and there’s so much more to explore and expand regarding this world and it’s characters, and since there’s a shitload of issues going on in the world right now, I’m confident this sequel will touch up upon another great lesson and handle it really well because Jared Bush and Bryon Howard are very good directors and writers in my eyes.

Inside Out 2: FUCK yes. This has got to be the one I’m the most excited for. I can see why some people are skeptical because some think it could be another “Turning Red” where they focus on puberty regarding a teenage girl, and yes that seems to be the route Inside Out 2 is making, but I personally have no problem with that, for me it’s all about how good the first one was. I could honestly write a whole essay on how well written this film was and the emotional impact it had on me as a person. The lesson that being sad is okay, not just sad…but embracing your other emotions and allowing yourself to feel those other emotions is SUCH a good moral to teach younger kids, and the way they handled that lesson was just amazing in my opinion. Inside Out has got to be one of my favorite if not THE favorite modern Pixar films I’ve ever seen, and I’m confident that the second film will be just as good. I can’t wait.

Frozen 3: I’m not really passionate about Frozen, I remember being dragged to the theater to see the first movie when it came out, and while the movie was obliviously flawed in many areas, I do think it’s deserves its praise here and there, wether you think it was handled well or not I’ll always applaud the film for at least attempting to write a complicated sister dynamic, and yes…most of the songs are really good. I never saw the sequel but good GOD I heard about the production issues it went through, going through many rewrites and scrapped content (that btw, was better than the end result) and how the team was STILL working on it a mere month or two before the film would release. They made an entire documentary about it and how it was hell for everyone, and I couldn’t help but feel really bad. Despite me not really caring for this franchise, I think Frozen deserves a third movie because with the right amount of time and effort, they can possibly create a better movie.

Toy Story 5: No. Just no. We don’t need any more, while I never saw the 4th movie because even THEN I thought there didn’t need to be any more, in SOME way, from what I’ve seen it did try to pull off a satisfying conclusion, especially for Woody’s character. However I will admit, the audience reactions were always split between saying it was really bad and not needed, to how it was really good and a perfect sendoff. All of that doesn’t matter now however, since they’re making another one and this is a sequel I can clearly tell Disney is just doing for the money. I always hate it when people take a franchise I used to love dearly and then just DRAAG it for way too long, like Despicable Me or Hotel Transylvania. No matter how good the franchise, no movie like these should be going up to 5 freaking sequels and all, that’s just ridiculous. I’d say “wait and see” but I’ve honestly lost passion for this franchise, in my opinion the third movie ended with a really good conclusion for everyone and they should have stopped there.

#Disney #Walt Disney #movies #animation #walt disney animation studios #Pixar #Disney Pixar #frozen 3 #zootopia #Zootopia 2 #toy story #toy story 5 #inside out #inside out 2 #disney animation #Disney movies #unrelated

[jqnehr]

Hey. Lurking stranger here. Please be kinder to yourself about your writing.

I know going back and reading through your works again can be discouraging. But I promise you they aren't nearly as bad as you seem to perceive them. There is no grade in fan fiction. It doesn't need to be perfect, and should have as many plot holes as it needs for the plot to work.

I've been having a blast reading les améthystes du ciel. I've found that a lot of arranged marriage fics tend to speedrun the problems to get to fluffy romance- nothing against them, but I'm very partial to reader characters who are believably upset with their circumstances. Your reader character has been fighting her feelings in a way I have found to be both believable and addicting to read. I want to know how her story goes.

But not at cost to you. If you are truly no longer having fun writing this story, it is unfair to expect you to continue it. At the same time, seeing you constantly bashing your own work has left me worried you'll discourage yourself to the point where you fail to recognize your own talent. I willingly read it. Repeatedly. And enjoy it.

Rooting for you. God Bless.

essay inbound in 3…2…1…

i really like how insightful this message is. thank you for this, you really summed up how I feel very accurately about my work and that’s quite encouraging <3

it’s funny, because what i consider to be top tier writing, the author of it may consider it to be dogwater. that’s me. but another reader, like yourself, enjoys it regardless. that’s really sweet, but also really conflicting, you get me?

there’s a lot about my fic that needs shaping, needs improvement, needs fixing—needs rewriting as a whole. i don’t think any of you can deny that. i was rereading chapter fourteen last night, and the ironic thing about it is that when i was writing that chapter, i remember being really disappointed in it and unhappy with it. now, i think it’s probably the best written one of the entire fic (my opinion) because it was kinda funny. key word: kinda.

im elated to see that my work has touched so many of you. it’s an author’s purpose to leave their readers staring at the wall or lying awake at night thinking about the story. i can only hope i’ve accomplished such a thing with all of you also. and considering what i have in store for you all, that’s almost a guarantee haha. fingers crossed.

however, as you mentioned, im beginning to hate writing my fic. partly because i want to write other things, and also because i can’t write my fic now without consciously thinking about whether this is well written. whether it’s good enough. to me, it isn’t, and i hate talking about this so much. it makes me sound like an attention seeker and that im whining for all of your affirmation. please understand that im not, and that im just expressing my feelings haha. idk how else to.

there’s a LOT more i want to say, but i’ll cut it here.

i haven’t completely given up on it yet, so for now, no, it’s not discontinued. i will keep going best i can, as i did promise that to you all. again, thank you to each and everyone of you that have sent kind messages and enjoyed reading my story. it’s very encouraging 💛

#˖ ࣪⭑𝐉𝐀𝐍𝐒❜ inbox ⨾ asked and answered !

[headbeachincharge]

question for the mun: what do you enjoy the most about hatter?

IN THIS ESSAY I WILL—

(tw: suicide, mental illness mentions below the cut)

I don’t mean to be pretentious, but since the first time I watched the show, I was just enamored with what he represents. I could throw a lot of sayings at you— “Do the ends justify the means?” and “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” are the two which most readily come to mind—but I think that’s just being needlessly vague.

To me, I think he was a very honest look at what a suicidal person looks like. I won’t bore you with the details, but I’ve seen them. Both in my life, and staring back at me in the mirror. One of the things people love to say about people who do attempt suicide (which he did, “successfully,” in season one) is that “we had no idea it was that bad.” And most times, it’s true. Suicidal people generally mask their pain. To the people around them, yes, but also to themselves. It’s a survival mechanism.

He builds an entire world to combat his own hopelessness while also trying to help those around him. Although it got twisted along the way due to his intensifying mental illness, I do believe that he was truly trying to help others while helping himself. I don’t think he believed the actual strategy was going to work, but I do think that he believed it would be enough to sustain him. The drinking? Coping mechanism. Indulging in sex, food, partying? Distractions, a way to get relief from the unbearable reality of his mental illness and the horrors he had witnessed. All of the things he did, from making those grand speeches to killing “traitors” for playing cards, were desperate attempts to keep his reality alive. And, by keeping his reality alive, he was able to keep himself alive.

A detail that I’m quite fond of is how he mentions the death of his partner at the original Beach. He had committed suicide, and Hatter is clearly deeply affected by it. I think that Hatter recognized those feelings his partner had been having inside of himself, and he was terrified of ending up like him. The Borderlands Beach would be his second chance, not only to relive the “glory days” of his host club career, but perhaps even as a way to get the “right” ending where everything is okay. Or, okay enough, at least for a time. He knew it wouldn’t last forever, but maybe it could last long enough to save the people he loves, Aguni in particular. This is purely speculation on my part, but I think it aligns with his handling of grief.

I have to commend the writers on creating such depth and nuance in a character who didn’t have much screen time in the scheme of the show. I have to commend the directors on knowing how they framed him and told us things about his character even when he wasn’t talking. The editors did an incredible job of putting together a cohesive and well-paced story.

And, of course, I can’t forget Kaneko Nobuaki for his performance. Not only did he play the silly guy and the serious guy so well that they were able to bleed into each other, but he made me believe it. Hatter is a truly outrageous and ridiculous character on paper, and to bring that to life in a way that felt at least somewhat realistic (given the circumstances of the show universe, of course) is no small feat. Side note: “Smoking” on Netflix is a (very dark) show which I believe really highlights just how weirdly good he is at balancing silly and serious, sometimes swinging between them multiple times throughout a scene.

Now if you don’t want to read all of the above because my GOD that’s a lot, here’s the TL;DR

Hatter is a complicated character who provides an honest and raw look at a person who is suicidal while also being entertaining to watch and expertly crafted by the people who brought him to life.

#alice in borderland #aib rp #aib roleplay #aib #danma takeru #hatter #Alice in borderland meta #Alice in borderland analysis #I feel like I could’ve written so much more but also….girl……calm down

[asm5129]

RWBY V9 E6 thoughts and analysis

Jaune, my poor boy

here he is having had to just kill a friend

Then he has the WORST luck and stumbles onto this weird-ass tree

(Love the clock tree’s design btw)

And then he picks the “time lime” (as a friend called it) and it sends him back decades, we don’t even know how much

And since he fell last, no one knows he fell at all

Meaning he has to wait even longer

In better news, love that Jaune sees Crescent Rose and immediately goes to save it when he’s falling

He knows how important it is to Ruby

(Or was. We’ll get there.)

We now have explicit time shenaniganery in the Ever After, and I doubt it’s our last

Poor Jaune though my god

What must he have gone through

GROUP HUG AWWWW

Weiss “if I knew he’d be this hot I’d have stuck it out” Schnee

“What good is saving anybody if Salem just destroys the world anyway”

I love how RWBY does this. This is a line that, on the surface, makes perfect sense. But it’s not the logic that’s flawed—it’s the mindset behind it.

Every moment of life is valuable. Every single one. (Link at the end to an amazing video essay on this using the lens of Life Is Strange).

Think about it. Otherwise, the fact that we’re not immortal would make our lives instantly meaningless, and that’s just not true.

On top of that, you could save the world, but if everyone (or nearly everyone) in the world is dead, that’s not really rational either

Like Yang says, the idea that saving individual lives doesn’t actually matter in the grand scheme of things is the path that led Ironwood to become a villain.

VILLAGE? Jaune has a village?! Who might we meet there? I’m intrigued

Jaune….why are you giving me Ironwood vibes? 😳

CC genuinely seems to be glad to see Jaune

The tree is what causes ascension!? What a twist

CC, you say that can’t happen to them, but you were also awfully worried that team RWBY wouldn’t be who themselves anymore after visiting Herb

Clearly you thought SOMETHING could happen

But…you were also worried something could happen….and actively tried to prevent it….So what’s going on here?

Ah, so THATS who the boy in the back of Alyx’s photo in the intro is

“You never asked, silly”

Thing is, I think CC is being sincere. I don’t think they were hiding it, they genuinely just don’t answer questions that aren’t asked. It’s just not part of the social contract from their perspective

A Punderstorm?

Also just realized

Jaune must have been actively fighting against the Ever Afters attempts to resolve his issues the entire time

Probably because of his trust issues which have only gotten worse over time it seems

Also first impressions of the Ever After being what they were for him probably didn’t help

But wow yeah

He must have been actively resisting healing from his pain for a ridiculously long time

Poor Jaune

Ah poor Weiss, she and the Ever After do NOT get along

“Something bigger to work out” eh?

“How do we take the next step” BEES

What do the symbols on these signs mean? Boy and paw?

SUMMER IN RUBYS REFLECTION

Oh my, it’s literally visualized in front of them but Ruby does not even notice her own trauma (Summer) yet ruminates on the trauma of others and her inability to fix things for them (Weiss and Atlas)

I do not trust Jaune’s story here, at least not completely. I don’t think he’s lying, but it’s very much filtered through a biased lens of trauma and trust issues

“She wasn’t just a little petulant. She was selfish, and cruel.” She also looks about thirteen

“Like the whole world was make-believe and the rules didn’t apply to her” MAYBE SHE THOUGHT IT WAS MAKE BELIEVE 🤯

We don’t know how she got to the Ever After, but it’s quite possible she genuinely didn’t think of it as “real”, which meant she didn’t have to feel bad about any of her actions

Just like how Alice in Disney’s adaptation (the animated one) didn’t really have to contend with her collateral damage since it was all a dream

What changed at the Herbalist, Alyx? What did Herb say to you?

“The more I tried to get the story back on track the more she distrusted me”

Honestly? That one I think is a little valid. You were trying to force a child’s life to fit a narrative you believed it was supposed to fit. If, say, she found out something along those lines, yeah of course she wouldn’t trust you Jaune.

Honestly, the more interesting thing for me is that she apparently lost all trust in Lewis as well.

“I couldn’t even be the make-believe hero”

Poor Jaune. For all the growth he had, there was still that part of him that saw himself as ultimately just “the lovable idiot stuck in the tree while his friends risk their lives” and he hates himself for that

For not being the hero he thought he should be.

Wait…Holy shit

In the Ever After, he was kinda stuck in a tree

Though not in it’s branches this time, he was stuck in its grasp nonetheless

“The Rusted Knight drank the poison in her stead” this is such a strange line

That’s gotta be intentional. Why does he refer to himself in third person as “the rusted knight”? What does he mean “in her stead”?!

It does obviously seem that the poison wasn’t lethal. So that’s another intriguing thing about Alyx. Jaune states that she said she “wasn’t going to let anyone stop her from leaving. She’d do whatever it takes”

And yet, she seemingly made sure not to kill him

“The cats role in the ever after…I figured it out later, when the cat came back for me once Alyx left” Okay so, I’ll admit there’s at least a chance it was lethal and the Cat saved Jaune somehow

But I think it’s more likely it wasn’t lethal, because the flashback had Jaune basically just falling unconscious to the best of what we can see. Of course, that doesn’t mean the Cat didn’t help him recover a bit….who can say, all I’m saying is it’s interesting the cat came back for Jaune.

Then again, maybe CC just genuinely didn’t understand there might be conflict between them now

Yeah so, lots of people have pointed this out, but this is where it becomes clear how biased Jaune is. The Cat took Alyx and Lewis to the tree, one of them got home—the assumption is it was Alyx since she supposedly wrote the book (many have pointed out it’s quite possible Lewis is the one who made it back, which is why Alyx is presented much more sympathetically in the story) and this is where all of Jaune’s issues finished the story for him.

He began to believe that the Cat was never helping anyone, that they were only ever manipulating them in order to feed the tree and keep the cycle going, and this is a clear indication of how his trust issues are affecting his ability to see things clearly

BZZZZZZZZZZZ ITS BEEEEEEEEES TIIIIIME BABYYYYYY

“I’ll feel a lot better when we’re together on that platform”

Just LOVE that Blake has been taking the lead this whole volume

She is ready to love and be loved

She knows who she is, she knows what she wants

And she’s done letting the memory of Adam or the threat of Salem or anything else stand in her way

“You’ve got a really good brain”

“You have cat ears!”

Yang flirting with Blake in volume 1 when they first met CONFIRMED

Also confirmed is that Yang’s inability to flirt with Blake is tied directly to her struggle with vulnerability

She’s scared to say what she means when it matters

THE MUSIC

YANG’S ADORABLE LITTLE “Shall we dance” ANIMATION

THE TEARS IN HER EYES

“I think you’re an extraordinary person. You’re always the first to lighten a situation. You act bravely when you’re afraid. You do what you say.

Try to keep up!”

“I like that you’ve never been intimidated by me….even when you didn’t like me very much.”

“I was a little weary of people in general…”

“But you never gave up on them, even when they hurt you. You never give up. You know what matters to you.”

This whole exchange is so beautiful

And I love that despite Yang’s comedy often acting as a defense mechanism and Blake’s unwillingness to give up on people causing her to stay with Adam, both are presented as something worth loving because that’s not all they are

Yang makes Blake smile. Sometimes it’s a defense mechanism, sometimes it’s not, but Blake loves that Yang makes her smile

And Blake’s refusal to give up on people was taken advantage of by Adam, but it in and of itself is hardly a bad instinct—and Yang saw that firsthand when Blake dedicated herself to making sure her team (and Yang especially) knew she was never going to run away from them again

And of course, that’s only the tiniest piece of why they love each other.

“You do what you say”

After all Adam’s manipulation, gaslighting and abuse, to have someone who says what she means and actually acts like it must be incredible

“You know what you want”

Yang’s always been a bit adrift, defining herself by her relationship to others. In v1 she mainly saw herself as Ruby’s older sister and parental figure; and she also defined herself by being abandoned by Raven and wanting to find her. It’s not that she never had wants of her own, but she her wants often depended on how she viewed herself in relation to others.

Blake took no shit, she was passionate, she took a stand when it was something she believed in—and maybe even inspired Yang to do the same in volume 8?

“Let’s make this quicker. Any big truths we haven’t dropped on each other yet?”

As soon as Yang says that, she knows the truth she has to say and the storm reacts and

THE COLORS

THE PURPLE AND YELLOW

ITS SO PRETTY

Everything in this scene is SO PRETTY

“It’s like…a cliff. And if I do it I’m just going to….fall.”

“I think we’re already falling…”

RWBY has played around a LOT with the idea of “falling”

Cinder Fall/the fall maiden and falling into the abyss after her fight with Raven

The fall of beacon

The intro to volume 3

Ironwood’s fall into villainy

Falling into the ever after

So much more

Hell, initiation literally launched them into the air and they had to learn how to develop a landing strategy as they fell!!! Fuck this show is so well-written

But here, Blake takes the idea of “falling”—presented as something dangerous by Yang—and reframes it into something explicitly positive for the first time

The big deep breath Yang takes…Blake is literally telling her she already knows, but poor Yang is still afraid she might not be loved back

But Blake doesn’t even let her finish before making sure she knows it’s real

I learned that apparently Lillies are the official lesbian flower so that’s just a wonderful detail

I love that this kiss isn’t rough and passionate like they’ve been waiting to get their hands on each other

It’s gentle and calm

Tender, and compassionate

And while it’s not verbalized, you can actually see them checking for the others consent!!!!

So CC definitely has been explicitly hiding SOME stuff

Like that they didn’t know Alyx wrote a book about her adventure

When CC implies Jaune isn’t particularly stable, his reflection becomes his younger self. Intriguing.

CC wanted to go to remnant? But Alyx didn’t take them. Intriguing. Also “through the door to remnant”?

And yeah, ultimately, team RWBY did not care about CC. They were using them. Despite everything they did for our heroes, they only saw CC as a guide and an annoyance to endure so they could get home

Blake’s leg is doing the thing and it’s adorable

“Feels like I’ve been waiting forever for that” WE ALL HAVE JAUNE THOUGH NOT AS LONG AS YOU BUT SEMANTICS IT WAS SO WORTH IT

Crescent Rose. Jaune found it.

And Ruby is straight-up disassociating poor girl

When she crafted Crescent Rose, she crafted Ruby Rose as well. And she doesn’t want to be Ruby Rose, so she rejects Ruby Rose’s weapon.

And tomorrow, my guess is we’ll get a return to the Blacksmith, and maybe some Summer/Salem info too.

That video essay I mentioned on why every moment of life matters (the thumbnail is a bit clickbaity, promise the video is exceptional)

And a fantastic breakdown of the Bumbleby Confession scene:

#rwby #rwby analysis #rwby positivity #rwby has great writing #rwby thoughts #rwby spoilers

[afriendlyblackhottie]

I posted 9,465 times in 2022

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I tagged 5,113 of my posts in 2022

Only 46% of my posts had no tags

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My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Also remember that guy that was asking for legal advice on Reddit and he was like his girlfriend got pregnant but she didn’t wanna keep it but he begged her to keep it and she was like OK but I don’t want anything to do with it and he agreed to it but he thought okay well if I can keep doing this maybe she’ll want it but then she was like no fuck it and she peaced the fuck out of there and she signed over all the rights to him so there’s like nothing he can do to make her stay but she pays a shit ton more in child-support then she even has to and she got a tummy tuck and started working at a gym and living her best life and he’s all like oh my God I can’t believe you wouldn’t let me trap you with a baby I didn’t realize parenting was going to be that hard and everyone was like well you should have let her get an abortion she told you she didn’t wanna be a parent and in this essay I wanna laugh

1,189 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

#4

Bedroom Eyes

Summary: maybe working on New Year’s Eve wasn’t always a bad thing

Pairings: Chris Evans x interviewer!Black!Reader

Warnings: minors dni, fake dating, smut, daddy kink, rough sex, over stimulation, orgasm denial, unprotected sex

(A/N: this is for my chick flick challenge!!! Yay finally putting something out ☺️☺️ not edited 👍🏾 like, follow, reblog with a comment and thanks for reading 💜 ✌🏾)

———-—————-—-—————-———

Six months ago you and your boyfriend decided to ‘go on a break.’ Whatever that was supposed to mean. It’s just things hadn’t been clicking and you thought maybe some time apart would bring you back together.

So you moved out of your shared apartment and in with your best friend who promised to make you get butt naked ass wild. Whatever that meant. It all sounded like fun and games and it technically was but you’d kissed one fucking guy and David lost is goddamn mind.

And then the truth came out.

For all the yelling and the bitching about you, it wasn’t you. David had made the decisions for you without you even knowing. It was over. That was that. His new girl was moving in. Taking up your spot in the bed. She got to be the one to steal from his plate. It was her hand he was holding.

And you’d just gotten the honors of seeing it up close and personal for the very first time.

By now you’d kind of adapted to being single. Started getting used to waking up alone. It was kind of nice because you got to spread out. There were definitely pros and cons to the whole situation.

Didn’t have to worry about feeding him anymore. That was nice. Only had to worry about you. Even if you kind of liked cooking for him. But he was so picky it got so annoying.

God you missed the consistent sex. Probably most of all. That rose clit stimulator was fun but you were dying for even a little bit of penetration.

You’d been together for so long you’d forgotten what it was like to just be. Alone. Just you. Like what did you really like. Did you even like The Walking Dead or was it just because he liked The Walking Dead. What kind of food did you even like. Music? Did you even like music. Or art. There was just so much to rediscover.

And you’d been on your way. Even got a sweet new gig . Hell you were doing great. So why the hell did it still feel like you’d gotten punched in the stomach when you saw them together.

“H-hey,” you stuttered out. You couldn’t help it as you picked her apart. From her hair to her clothes. At some point you just got petty in your head and god you didn’t want to be one of those girls.

“Hey, Y/N,” he greeted you all smiley and shit. Like we get it. God you sounded like such a hater. But who could blame you. You were pretty fucking salty. “Wha- what’re you doing here?” He asked all enthusiastic this smile spreading across his face.

She put her hand on his bicep and all you could think was, ‘girl, calm down. Nobody want him.’ Like a liar.

“Just hanging out,” you replied. “You must be Melissa.”

She nodded. “Uh huh. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“Oh wow wish I could say the same for you,” you said through your forced smile. You didn’t mean to sound so bitchy it was just you were fucking hurt. He’d moved on so quickly. Like had dropped an entire bomb on you that he’d met someone.

Honestly you’d only been here because you’d gotten invited last minute which made it even more fun that you’d run into them. And by fun you mean you wanted to pull out your eyelashes.

At least, Your sweet new gig came with some perks you admit. Had gotten to take home some pretty cool freebies. Like the new iPhone you’d gotten in a gift basket. Or all the meals on company dime. Yeah interviewing celebrities definitely came with it’s perks. Even when it meant working on New Year’s Eve, which ended up being worth it.

Well okay it would come with more perks but this had been your first big story. The actor you were interviewing was only free today since he was flying out soon and no one else had wanted to work on the holiday but it was kind of paying off for you.

You met up at this cafe which you were supposed to use to pay with the card your manager had given you except that he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He’d been way sweeter than you’d expected and you don’t know how the two of you ended up sharing your life stories but you had.

Questions had been abandoned for conversation instead. Didn’t even look at your notepad at some point. Besides you were pretty sure all of this would stick in your mind. And that’s why he invited you to come out tonight. Neither of you wanted to stop talking.

It wasn’t like a date or anything. Just the two of you had been having fun. He was easy to talk to. First covering your childhoods because for some reason while you were supposed to be asking questions he kept going ‘hmmm what about you?’ like he wanted to hear all about it.

And he was really, really hot so it made you wanna talk longer.

Since the break had officially turned into a breakup your best friend had been trying to press you about getting yourself out there. Had tried tinder which was like a wasteland if you were being honest. And you ended up being uninterested in all the guys your friends tried to play matchmaker with.

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2,125 notes - Posted January 20, 2022

#3

2,469 notes - Posted March 9, 2022

#2

Dangerous Woman

Summary: you’ve been a thorn in Lloyd’s side for too long. Turned out you were wearing him down.

Warnings: smut, minors dni, daddy kink, dub/non con towards the end, creampie, rough sex, name calling, if there’s any tags I missed please tell me lol

(A/N: there’s no way I’m alone in my new obsession with Lloyd Hensen so I wrote this fic hoping others would see my vision. Unedited. Like, follow, and reblog with a comment 💜 ✌🏾)

———-—————-—-—————-———

It was an understatement to say that Lloyd saw you as a thorn in his side.

The way you seemed to pop up wherever he may be. Trying to get your hands on the same shit as him. Who the hell did you even think you were, trying to step to him. Must have been out of your goddamn mind.

You’d fancied yourself as a “good guy.” He took it more so to mean you were just boring. Couldn’t keep up in a world like his so you had to become a whatever the fuck you were trying to do to feel like you were doing something special.

But what were you really doing aside from annoying the fuck out of him? Not much. Well except…

It wasn’t often that a man like Lloyd found someone that could keep up with him in the slightest. He liked being one step ahead in any given situation. Was a man with a plan even if those plans didn’t account for any casualties. He didn’t give a shit if people died as long as he was still living the world was blessed with his presence and that was all anyone needed.

So when you started popping up like a gnat to the finest fruit, he knew he had to squash you somehow. Not like he was against playing dirty to get to where he needed to be. Just because you wanted to be a goody two shoes doesn’t mean he cared. If anything it only made him want to get you to cut this shit out sooner.

Such a shame though. In another life he could have marveled at your beauty. Found you cute enough that he’d even be willing to make an honest woman out of you if you didn’t annoy him so fucking much. Maybe that’s what made it worse. Crushing on the enemy? What the fuck was this? Middle school?

But first he needed to find out who the hell you were working for. So far the CIA had been ruled out. You didn’t appear to be a cop. Unaffiliated with that other shmuck and his team. That was the strange part.

Yet you managed to keep up somehow. Funny how that worked.

First it started out with you intercepting a “package” he was supposed to pick up. Then you somehow ended up getting your hands on a very expensive painting that he was pretty sure was meant to be hung up in his humble abode of a mansion in Croatia. And he was pretty sure you were responsible for that building blowing up when he had his eyes on a target.

The paranoia had started eating at him. Making him feel like he always had to watch over his back. Grown men hadn’t bothered him as much as you had. Each encounter seeming to be a bigger version of the one before and that’s why he was making it his mission to destroy you.

——————————————————

“I would have had her if you stupid fucks would stay the fuck out of my way!” He yelled as he stomped up their stairs. Not wanting everyone to know how things had really went down.

This was supposed to be easy as hell. Should have been an in and out if anything. Just take you out and boom he could finally move on from this game of cat and mouse.

He had you! The two of you finally getting into it one on one when he found you alone on top of the building. Was just about to pin you down when the team came up. Making you do a quick disappearing act.

Before anyone could respond because it’s not like he gave any fucks about what excuses they came up with, he stomped up the stairs. One more move away from throwing a full blown tantrum. This shit should not be this fucking hard.

Lloyd huffed as he retreated to his bedroom. For once didn’t even want to say anything anymore. Probably because this was total and complete bullshit.

For once he wasn’t getting his way and he really didn’t fucking like it. It wasn’t like they didn’t know who the fuck you were. It was like you weren’t even trying to hide it. Of course he had the technology to crack your nothing ass passwords. It was the same for everything.

Sure there were things they had nothing on like your family and where you came from, but they knew your name. Your fucking phone number. What you looked like.

Almost like you wanted him to find all that shit. God it- it pissed him the fuck off. How he couldn’t stop staring at those photos of you. Like he was waiting for you to pop out from the shadows. Then he could finally show you just how fucking much you annoyed him.

His chest tightened as he inhaled deeply. Feeling a fire in the pit of his stomach. He can’t remember the last time something had gotten him this worked up.

How he found even more ready to finally get rid of you was that each time he looked, he found himself going over every feature. From those eyes to that curl in your lips to the cleavage you were definitely not trying to hide.

It wasn’t like Lloyd couldn’t get any woman he wanted. Of course he could. For all the things they say about him all of them wanted to know what it was like to get a piece of him. They’d be willing to put up with it for a millisecond.

Hell he hadn’t even been able to hit up his usual roaster of broads as he’d been too pre-occupied by you. Fucking, ugh!

He doesn’t know what it was. Call it a crush as disgusting as that sounds, but he found himself fucking obsessed with the idea of getting his hands on you and at this point you’d toyed with him so much he wasn’t even sure how he meant it anymore.

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2,614 notes - Posted August 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

12,801 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #false

[zalrb]

OTH 2X22 REWATCH REVIEW

 1. IIIIIIIIIII DON’T WANNA BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT I’VE BEEN TRYNA BE LATELYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

2.

3. At least she was less exhausting for a few episodes.

4. “Game to 11? I’ll give you 10 and the ball?” Sometimes Lucas is funny.

5. Are Delena shippers just Dan Scott in disguise?

6. I like how Karen is just walking on glass.

7. Lmao, Nicki lied under oath so that means that Jake gets Jenny until a new hearing but Jake literally kidnapped his child and hid from the police, they would not put Jenny in his custody. I still love how neither of these people have involved parents.

8.

Because you’re not funny, Whitey.

9. I like how anyone can just get into see Haley by saying they know her. She’s supposed to be a rising star.

10. Look, I’m all for living your life and having fun with whoever you want but the husband you apparently love crashed a race car then gave you annulment papers, Haley.

11. “We’re just kidding around like ...” “We used to do?” I’ve never seen you two do anything remotely like this.

12. “I miss you so much” there are phones, you know. And webcams. You guys could’ve been talking if you wanted to.

13. “For every sentence you write of your essay, I’ll give you a kiss.” Ugh, either makeout fully or leave me alone to do my final, please.

14. “Hey, Nathan, I’m sorry I’m happy.” OH MY GOD, PEYTON WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP? Either DON’T tell him Jake’s getting out of jail and call Brooke to tell her the news instead or just own the fact that you’re happy. YOU ARE INSUFFERABLE.

15. I like how there are NO guards in this scene. At the very least the guards should be restraining Jake while he tries to explain to them that Nicki is kidnapping his child who he kidnapped first.

16. “You know he told me not to come home, right?” Girl. GO ANYWAY.

17. “You stuck by me when I left the river court” right but no one else was getting emotionally slaughtered in the process of you doing that. But whatever.

18. No one is asking Haley for an autograph.

19. “But you can come into the devil’s lair. Have sex with Chris Keller. Whatever!” Not gonna lie, I always laughed at that line.

20. “Here’s the deal, Brooke Davis thinks that Chris Keller can self-serve Chris Keller in other words you can---” “Hey Brooke!” “I can’t breathe ... there’s no room in Chris’ ego. CAN WE GO?” she has the best lines on the show.

21. Lucas is so nonthreatening.

22. I like how easily the glass in Dan’s office can shatter.

23. “I don’t understand why it has to be music or Nathan” well exactly. 

24. Awww Jeyton break up. Now, I know the point is that Jake is saying she deserves better than being with someone who goes to jail or has to go on the run and who doesn’t have a stable life and that’s why he breaks up with her but it’s summer now, she legit could’ve just gone looking for Jenny with him for two months and then gone back to school but it’s fine.

25. “You’re too amazing to be carrying this around, you’re too full of greatness.” I mean, I guess.

26. Tbh though, the acting could use work, Hilarie’s like squeal cries aren’t working for me and Bryan’s pained face doesn’t have the necessary nuance but when they hug? THAT’S when I really feel how torn up they are

27. "May angels lead you in...” oh my God, I remember on one of our high school trips to the States, the boys came into our hotel room to hang out and they played this song on their guitars. They also played “Chasing Cars” “Hey there Delilah” and of course “Wonderwall.” Fucking high school. 

28. I think I did a Stefan and Lexi video to this song. I did. Oh God, it’s so bad.

29. Always loved this moment.

30. BEST SCENE. “It’s OK that you’re into Peyton” because he looks at her like that is the DUMBEST thing I’ve heard in my LIFE, Brooke. MY. LIFE.

31. Keith and Karen are just not believable as THAT ship. Like when Karen whispers Andy’s name, the way she closes her eyes?

 I was glad  they eventually ended up together.

32. But Andy rolling up in a limo is so fucking extra.

33. “Did you know that you’re bleeding?” “Yeah, it’s kinda weird. It should probably hurt but I don’t feel anything.” SYMBOLISM.

34. I like how The Wreckers are the bigger names in this whole thing but Chris and Haley take up most of the space on the poster.

35. “Shaw was right, as we strain to grasp the things we desire” SHUT UP, LUCAS. Even Peyton’s voiceover is less insufferable than yours.

[potato-jem]

Hi Nero!! <3

how are you doing honey?? i’ve been mia for a few days because i was on a very last minute trip!! i went to see louis tomlinson singing in a freaking greek theatre in sicily!!!

i honestly still can’t believe it, between my obsession for greek mythology and culture and my love for louis i can’t believe i really was lucky enough to see him sing in a place like that. the place was the teatro antico in taormina and it was so intimate and beautiful!! and i literally found the ticket like a week ago!!

all the dates here in italy went sold out months ago but a week ago i was just casually checking the ticket website and someone was reselling their ticket so in like 20 minutes i had a whole trip to sicily booked and a concert ticket!! i don’t even know how i managed, i literally stayed there 48 hours and then stayed on a bus for 15 hours to go back home, which was horrible, but it was so worth it

this was the venue, and i mean, isn’t it breathtaking??

now i’m gonna stop annoying you with this concert, i was just so so happy to be there, it meant the world to me!! i always feel at home at louis’ concerts <3

anyway now i’m back home and i feel really old because i need like a week to recover for all this back pain i have because of jumping around all night and sleeping on a bus for 10 hours 😂

how are you nero?? catch me up on anything i missed in these few days!!

also, in regards to our last letter, i just want to say that that tattoo artist who had heartstopper tattoos is my new hero and i just want to fly to australia to get a tattoo there!! also say hello to the strawberry cow for me, i’ve missed him!! <3

i’m hugging you real tight and giving you a forehead kiss <3

hello cece!!!

i do remember you mentioning you had a last minute trip booked, but you didn’t say it was for a louis tomlinson!!

the venue is beautiful, oh my god. my jaw is on the floor! it is so so so stunning!! i’m glad you had an amazing time (horrible bus rides are worth the happy memories) it sounds like it was meant to be! and don’t ever feel bad about annoying me about anything, i would read paragraphs and paragraphs about anything you are passionate about <3

yes, please rest. your body needs to recover after all that jumping around. you need to balance the fun with some chill time

i am doing alright!! i have seven days of work in a row (boo!), but i have my trip next week that i was telling you about! (yay!) i finished all my midsemester essays, and i was surprised at how well i did them (despite the fact i did them the day they were due, i am never doing that again)

i went to the bookstore and found a book i didn’t even think i would ever find here, AND IT WAS THE LAST COPY! i snatched it before my friend even knew what i gasped at. and i also visited my friend at his job! he works in a cute little bubble tea place and he made me a drink, which made my day! other than that, i have been trying to relax in between shifts and planning out where i want to go on my trip!! i will obviously tell you all about it

he really is super cool, i’m definitely booking with him at one point!! and terry the berry cow says hello and is giving you a hug! please say hi to simba for me!!! <3

i’m sending tight hugs and a forehead kiss <33

#nero attempts to socialise #i saw your little url pop up on my watch at work and i was like :o #i think i confused a few people but that’s okay #cece my beloved!!!

[crownamedblue]

Letters to myself

Blue (any/all)

This is the part of the article known as the introduction. Similar to an essay format, this has a broader beginning, eventually funneling to a more concentrated idea, be it something to be explained or a question to be answered. This is also where I usually address you, the readers, and congratulations, you have been addressed! Unlike my other articles, this paragraph is the only section written for you, to you. In this dead stretch of time, when winter drags so slowly, I thought something more personal to me might be more satisfying than what amounts to a rant about whatever caught my interest this week. And so, the rest of this isn’t for you, isn’t to you, isn’t about you. These are letters to my past selves, be them short or long, with things I wish I could tell all the past mes. Each letter is to a different moment, and so just one beginning simply will not do. If you find that you can relate, good for you, and I hope these bring you solace, but again, this isn’t about you. This time it’s about me.

Dear Milo,

You need to stop manually changing your personality like this. I know, it seems like it’s working, and every change you make eventually feels natural. I know you think that eventually they’ll stop feeling fake, but it’s been more than a few years, and I promise you, they don’t. Growth is natural, don’t force it. You don’t want to forget your original personality, trust me.

Hey Kid,

You’re hurting, and that’s okay. You should know it isn’t your fault. You’re not dumber, or have less willpower, or your subconscious hates you. You have Attention Deficit Disorder, it’s not your fault, you can’t help it. In a few years you’ll get a diagnosis and start taking meds for it, and I promise you’ll feel so much better.

Mon amie,

Hormones aren’t going to turn you into a meathead, promise. You’re allowed to enjoy sports or feel romantic attraction, you’re not suddenly going to transform into a misogynist. You are, however, going to transform into a bisexual. You know, once you get over all this. Just warning you now.

I’m Sorry,

I don’t know if she loved you. I think she did, but I guess I’ll never really know. I haven’t talked to her since you stopped. I do know, however, that he didn’t, but I don’t think that you really did either. He was good for you, despite what happened, or, rather, didn’t happen. Take solace in that.

You absolute fool,

That Cracker Barrel offer was absolutely meant to be a date, they’ve wanted to be with you since fall fest. For the love of god, that graveyard walk to the amphitheater was easily the most romantic thing that’s ever happened to you. So help me if you screw this up (and we both know you won’t, as I’m still with them but regardless) I will put anthrax in this letter. I mean it.

Guess What,

You have anxiety! Surprise! You really, and I cannot emphasize this enough, need therapy. I know you were planning on waiting until college, but the copay is only twenty dollars. Mom and Dad’s insurance covers most of it. You having anxiety, talking about having anxiety, doesn’t just magically invalidate other peoples’ experiences. In other news, you’re genderqueer! Double Surprise! In case you were wondering (and I know you weren’t, denial being what it is) your experiencing dysphoria also doesn’t invalidate other people. And don’t argue with me, you literally hate your reflection and will dodge a photo being taken of you at all costs. If you try to argue with me about how you talking about your experience detracts from other peoples, then allow me a simple reroute to my earlier points: Therapy and Only Twenty Dollars. I hate to be that person, but you really need it. Also, I’m sorry, but you know that semi-embarrassing nickname they gave you at school after staining your fingers? Yeah it's going to grow on you. Be prepared for jokes about naming yourself after a color. My bad I guess.

By the by,

That joke was funny, and I also can’t believe no one else appreciated it. Your dedication to your crafts, be it music, art, or writing, is inspiring to say the least. You deserve the praise you’re not getting, as well as all the praise you do. What isn’t special for you can be special for somebody else. You trying to fight against it only makes everyone else feel bad, including yourself.

In case you were wondering,

Your current friend group is going to drift away a bit. I know, I know, you called it. But did you really call it, or was it just anxiety? Again, therapy. Either way it’s going to happen, and it’s going to suck. That being said, you have other friends. They might be from other schools, or you might not have seen them in a while, but they are really, truly, your friends. They come to school specifically for you, don’t take that for granted. You’re really close now, and from what I can tell you’ll only get closer. I know you don’t like physical touch, but you’ll feel safe enough around them to ask for it, and guess what: they don’t ask any questions, they don’t judge, they react with complete understanding, and they’ll get so excited when you seek them out. For future reference, shoulder perching is awesome, and everyone loves it. Just saying.

Oi idjit,

They love you so much, stop being so anxious about it. They’d do anything for you, and I know it’s scary, but you’d do anything for them. It’s okay to feel this strongly about someone, even though the last time hurt you. And if you didn’t feel this strongly I’d be concerned. They love you so much, they memorize almost every passing thought you have. Remember complaining how he was supposed to take you on the Ferris wheel during that one summer fair? Guess who remembered even after you forgot. Guess who kissed you at the tippy top of that thing. I cannot emphasize enough how much they love you, and you should do your absolute best to ensure that their love isn’t misplaced.

Dear Blue

Don’t forget, you have a chariot article coming up. Don’t forget that you need to write something, and may I suggest making it a little more personal? People are emotionally exhausted this time of year, so maybe not one of your usual rants. Just a thought.

Sincerely, Blue (any/all)

#replacing my real name with my old username #I am so cool #my writing #letters #me being sappy #crowfeatherquill

[three--rings]

Kinnporsche ep 13 liveblogging

Literally ONE LINE into the episode I had to stop and come here to go AAAAAHHHHHHH.

I’m fine, I’m fine.

It really does sorta hit different when you’re not expecting it and you get a line like that in English. VEGAS.

And the rest of that scene, my god.  Vegas is GONE on Pete, holy crap.  And Pete’s live in the moment, act by what you feel philosophy makes sense. 

Did I think I was gonna ship these two at all?  No.  Am I losing my mind over them since last week?  Fucking yes.

What did I miss?  Why are they back?  So we don’t get a scene where they left and we don’t get a scene when they come back, this is honestly super annoying. 

OMG Vegas is cooking for him isn’t he?  God that looks delicious. 

--

Okay so I’ve had to watch these Vegaspete scenes twice. (up until the Tankhun interruption) So first I want to know what “I don’t like it” means or if that’s an accurate translation.  And Pete, you did more than not say no.  So okay, Pete’s having a hard time accepting that he enjoyed what they did.  Especially in the circumstances, fair.

And as usual I get where Vegas is coming from.  Pete is weakness and there’s no place for that in his life.  Pete obviously cares but Vegas can’t stand to be pitied.  Pete offers him an alternative but that’s going against Vegas’ entire life.  So it makes sense he lashes out. 

--HoOLY SHIT that scene with Vegas and Pete.  Like fucking GOD.  Both of them, bravo.  Like...I’m still not 100% where Pete is coming from, like is this all just a result of everything he’s been through, which, fair.  Or is this longer standing depressive/suicidal ideation.  Wouldn’t be surprised and it would honestly make this pairing make even more sense.

I really kinda hoped Vegas was going to let Pete leave, but I think he was going to unlock him, he just begged him not to leave because he’s, yanno, broken.  But it’s understandable for Pete to run.  Although if he could have done that the whole time why not before now? 

Anyway, yeah this is just all so compelling and complicated and interesting and yeah....also not what I was expecting, which is also good.  I don’t want this show to stop surprising me. 

I honestly can’t believe I’m only 20 minutes into this episode.

Sad bitches hours I see.

-Well, that was fast to get Porsche and Vegas working together.  And Vegas and Pete are going to fucking kill me, my god. 

Oh, I thought it was adorable when I thought it was Kinn introducing Porsche to his mom, but no, it’s Porsche’s parents and he wants to be introduced.  God. OMG that kiss, fingers thing was so cute.

Ooo, here we go.  I was spoiled that we’re getting the pool scene but in all this vegaspete angst I forgot.  Hello side asss...

I freaking love the sex scenes in this show.  At some point I’ll probably write an essay about it.  And of course Porsche takes off, though I’m surprised he takes Porchay, though I’m guessing that’s for the Kim plot. 

Naturally the uncle is killed. 

So this makes Porsche and Kinn first cousins?  Supposedly?  I mean it’s better than brothers, which was kinda what they were implying before.  Well, whatever, I’m not watching this for the plot. 

It WOULD make sense why Korn brought Porsche in, though.

Okay off to enjoy gifs.  This was an overall stronger episode than last week.  Looking forward to more vegaspete, hopefully with another sex scene. 

#kinnporsche #kinnporsche spoilers #threerings watches kinnporsche

[addictedtostorytelling]

Personally, there's one subject I never "visit" in my head pertaining to GSR, and that's their divorce. I've always felt it was OOC and it was the one time TPTB screwed up. I've read you essay rationalizing it, and you've done a brilliant job, the best take on it I've read. I'd love to know- have you personally "accepted" it, eg do you believe that now that we've had (hopefully perpetual) happy ending for them, did divorce have a place to be at the time that it happened? Thanks very much!

hi, anon!

oh, god, not even a little have i accepted the divorce!

never will i.

it is by far my least favorite storyline of any on the whole show (and probably even of any of the shows i’ve ever watched), and episode 13x15 “forget me not” is, imo, one of the worst hours of television ever written—just a tire fire of a script.

though i’ve penned a rationalization of the divorce that begrudgingly tries to make sense of the canon, i will never believe it was the right move for the writers to have made and don’t think that my rationalization really works if we truly take into account how the characters actually would function, were they not being wielded by morons incorrectly.

grissom and sara, whose whole mo is “i literally cannot stay away from this person for long, even when i actively try to, as my love draws me to him/her like a super magnet and consistently, inevitably has done so for 15+ years now,” would never under any circumstances have chosen to live on separate continents from each other to begin with, so the entire premise for the divorce is a flawed one from the get-go.

the divorce was ooc, it was lazy, it was a bad-faith storytelling action, it was a poorly executed maneuver even for what it was trying to be, it was cruel to the fans, it was senseless for the characters, it was retrogressive for their developments, it was thematically indefensible given their histories*, it was narratively unnecessary, and ultimately it proved absolutely pointless since nothing about sara’s characterization or usage changed in its wake and it was eventually “undone” by the events of the original series finale anyway—to the point that the writers of the reboot could and did all but retcon it out of existence in csi: vegas s1.

* how could tptb possibly think it was okay, given sara’s backstory, to have the one person who had ever consistently loved her and who had become her touchstone and family and home abandon/reject her? how could they take away her happy ending that way and just act like it was nothing or even like it was fine for her? and especially when it would have been so easy for them simply not to do so? had they not been able to reverse the decision later on in “immortality” (i.e., had sara actually finished out the show alone, never having reconciled with grissom), the final message of her storyline would have been, “the girl who grew up believing that no one who fully knew her would ever love her forever and/or choose to stick around for her when things got hard was ultimately right to think that way,” which is just an egregiously shitty through-line; utterly cynical and mean.

* and don’t even get me started on why the divorce was thematically unforgiveable on grissom’s side of things, too. 

while there are many other reasons why i disdain the later seasons of the original csi, as well—personally, i think tptb screwed up a lot during those days—the divorce is one of the biggest reasons why i do.

not only did it not need to happen, but it should never have happened at all.

in my personal headcanon, i completely ignore it.

it is not a part of my mental schema for these characters at all.

and in fact, i go as far as to reject basically anything that happens from episode 09x10 “one to go” on—or even prior to sara leaving vegas in s8, if i’m honest.

so while some fans have come to accept the divorce, i can’t and won’t. given how i understand these characters and the beats and themes of their story, it just doesn’t make sense to me. there’s nothing good about it. nothing justified. nothing that rings even a little bit true.

i’m more than happy to pretend the whole shitshow of a story arc never happened at all.

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

#answered #anon #asks: csi #** #my meta #meta: csi #meta: production #later seasons #season thirteen #let's talk shop #csiverse

[brotherdusk]

You inspired me to check out Pathologic, no clue what this game has in store for me tho :] thanks!

oh good god anon, my initial reaction to this ask was terror 😭

don't get me wrong, I'm so excited to hear I got someone interested in these games, because there's so much about them that's amazing and deserves to be widely appreciated! but I'd be doing my love for it a disservice if I didn't warn you there's a large chance that you won't actually enjoy playing it and will quit without finishing (especially if you go in completely blind)... and that's totally ok! you wouldn't be alone!

pathologic 1 is hard! it's purposefully obtuse and janky and cruel. pathologic 2 is much more polished, but I still stopped playing halfway through because it got too stressful (admittedly I was working an intense job at the time, so maybe I could pick it up again now and have more success). the point is, for a lot of people, actually playing the games themselves isn't always the best way to consume pathologic - and it's okay if it's not for you! you can and should enjoy it in other ways! (I'm still really glad I did play as much of 2 as I did, though - some aspects of the gameplay and atmosphere have to be experienced firsthand to be truly appreciated.) (EDIT: can’t believe I forgot to say this but the marble nest DLC for pathologic 2 is perfect, self-contained, can be played without touching the main game, and is much easier. huge recommend if you’ve got the cash to spare)

I also can't recommend SulMatul's longform playthroughs enough if you want to experience the entire game without having to suffer through it yourself - she runs every route, voice acts the NPCs (the irish accent she gave to Bad Grief is permanently etched in my mind because it's perfect), she knows the lore inside and out, and her in-character roleplaying is fantastic. start with her bachelor playthrough if you’re interested, the audio is rough at times but so worth it

and even if you do enjoy playing the games yourself and don't need to take the easy way out like me, I still highly recommend watching hbomberguy's Pathologic is Genius, And Here's Why video essay at some point. it's a deep analysis of the plot, meta, and mechanics of the first game (no spoilers for the second game) and was responsible for kicking off my interest in the series in the first place.

that was a lot! again, I'm super flattered that my pathologic posting inspired you to check it out, and I hope you find your ideal way to consume all the amazing things it has to offer <3 please feel free to drop by again at any point and let me know how you're finding it!!

#asks

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #008

“if there’s a god, why did he let the devil do his work on me?”

Are you currently mad at anyone? Nah, not actively. Do you like drawing on cement with chalk? I loved drawing with chalk as a kid. I mean I probably still would, but my fat ass and inadequately-muscled legs are NOT letting me get on the ground if I want back up, haha. When was the last time you went tanning? I've never deliberately tried to tan because I hate the feeling of heat literally cooking me. Do you like the smell of fresh cut grass? No. Have you ever worked at a party store? No. Are you creative? I think I am and have been told I am. Do you know how to play poker? Haha, it's funny, I did at a certain age as a kid, but now remember nothing as an adult. Do you always wear your seatbelt? Yes, always. Do you sing in the shower? No. Showers are fucking torture for me because of my legs so I get in and get the fuck out as fast as possible, I'm not concentrating on anything else. Have you ever been called a slut/whore/something along those lines? Only playfully by friends, never seriously. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly/didn't even know? Yes. Do you do drugs? No. Where do you want to get married? I have a few ideas. The absolute dream wedding would be in some sort of beautiful gothic building, like an old mansion, in the ballroom. I'll tell you right the fuck now I couldn't even dream of affording a venue like that though, so a more realistic option would be in some autumn woods, maybe by water or even a waterfall. Have you ever made yourself throw up? So, uh... I have tried. At my last job, when I was in the restroom having a panic attack and crying, I stuck my finger down my throat trying to force myself to vomit to give myself an extra reason to go home. And let me add how fucking TERRIFIED I am of the sensation of vomitting, if that helps give you an idea of how severely I was panicking. It didn't work. Honestly I probably would've kept trying if my co-worker hadn't come into the restroom making sure I was okay. Approximately two hours of fucking disaster. Have you ever fallen in love with a really good friend of yours? Haha yeah, I'm dating him rn. Do you own a blacklight? Not to my knowledge. Do you like fruit better than vegetables? Oh, absolutely. Have you ever been expelled from school? No. Do you believe you've met your soulmate or one of them? I don't believe in the concept of "soulmates." When did you last have grape juice? Literally the worst flavor of juice, ugh. I tried some back in March at the hospital because I really didn't want water, but I took one fuckin sip and got some water lmao. Have you learned anything today? Yeah honestly, but I don't wanna write an essay about it. Do you like the smell of coconut? Sure. It's not a favorite or anything, but it still smells fine. Do you prefer longer or short socks? Oh god, I used to be ALL over ankle socks, not feeling the sock stop there drives me FUCK-ING insane, like I can't wear them. I like socks that are at a normal length, really. Not terribly high, not very low. Do you like to leave your window open at night or do you use a fan? I have two fans that are always on in my room. If you find a spider in your home, do you set it free or kill it? I actually haven't been in this position in a very, very long time, considering these days I would want to catch it and let it out. How many pets have you had in your lifetime? I literally couldn't count, especially when we had a cat problem growing up. Do you sunburn easily? Ludicrously easily. What did you get into trouble for as a kid? Mostly for reasons related to being on the computer too much, fighting with my younger sister, and uhhh... idk. I was a good kid. What's something good that has happened here recently? Uh... idk. Like, there's stuff ig, but nothing remarkable. Who did you last say "I love you" to? My boyfriend. When did you last feel beautiful? Ugh I never do. ^ tries his hardest to assure me I am, but I just honest to god don't see what he does. Are you currently frustrated over something? Yeah. I just don't feel like getting into it. Have you ever had a yard sale? Yes. Do you enjoy going to yard sales or garage sales? It's not something we really *do*, but Mom and I both do like looking at random and obscure stuff. Do you like gummy bears? I do, gummy candy is the best. Do you ever get room service when staying in hotels? We barely ever, ever stay in hotels, but any time we have, we haven't gotten room service, to my memory. Who knows you better than anyone else? My mom. Sara. Have you ever caught a fish? Many, growing up going fishing all the time with Dad. Can you honeslty say you love the last person you kissed? I can very very confidently say I'm in love with him. What does your last text mesage say? I don't feel like checking, but I think it was Dad sending me a picture from the plane he'd just boarded to go to Michigan (or Ohio?) to see family. What does the last person you kissed name start with? "D," though I don't call him by this name. How many people have you kissed in the last 5 months? One. When did you last have sex? Still never lmao we just haven't gotten to that point yet for multiple reasons I'm not gonna elaborate on. Like we're perfectly comfortable doing it, there are just a number of reasons why we haven't. When did you lose your virginity? ^ Does anyone call you baby? Girt, sometimes. It's not a regular, and I prefer it that way. What do you currently hear? "Armee der Tristen" by Rammstein. It's never going to end y'all Who was your first love? Jason, my high school boyfriend. What would you do if your doctor told you, you were pregnant? Well, given what I just said a few moments ago, I'd tell them they physically couldn't have the right person because I don't believe in immaculate conception. Do you still watch MTV? "Still?" I never did to begin with. Does the person you like know you like them? I make it pretty obvious. If you're dating someone how long have you been together? 10 months. What’s the longest relationship you have ever been in? 3 1/2 years. Do you know anyone who has gotten an abortion? Yes, and I promise you do too. It's not rare. People just don't talk about it because of the stigma. Have you ever kissed in the rain? Yeah. Have you ever spent the night with the last person you kissed? He literally spent the night a couple days ago. He's done it in the past too. I've never stayed at his place yet, though. Do you have a bad reputation? I wouldn't know, go ask people I associate with. Have you ever gone through a bad breakup? *performs Sign of the Cross* Has anyone ever used a cheesy pickup line on you? Idk, maybe. Would you ever want a statue made of you? Uh, ew. Has anyone ever called you dumb? Probably at some point. If we're including myself, then yeah that's like, daily. Do you have any cats? We have one. <3 Sometimes I want one more, but more often I'm content with just Roman, especially considering he would get out-of-this-fuckin'-world jealous. Have you broken anyone's heart? I don't know. Jason chopped me off and out of his life like a gangrenous limb, completely and entirely ceasing contact that I really don't have any way of knowing exactly how the breakup affected him. Tyler ACTED like I broke his heart after two fucking weeks when I can absolutely assure you I did not. He just had insane attachment problems. God I'm glad I said "fuck this, I'm out" when I did. What’s the craziest rumor you’ve ever heard about yourself? I've only ever heard one, which was basically that Jason and I magically had a baby over one summer. It was started by his ex, who had a grudge against me even BEFORE we dated, and she clearly did not think this shit through considering I was very slim in high school and clearly NOT pregnant at any point. Anyway, I'm friends with this person now. Things sure do change, haha. What’s the coolest name you’ve ever heard someone have? Ohhhh let's see... Well, I did have a friend named Journee (like "Journey") which I always thought was a beautiful, brilliant name for a person just going through and experiencing life. I am sadly 90% sure though she committed suicide because of something very serious she was dealing with at way too young of an age. No one should go through what she did, but never mind a child. She confided in me a lot, and during our last few messages, she was saying some concerning things and then just disappeared, permanently. What’s your least favorite genre of music and why? Rap, probably. I just don't like what is typically sung about and just the whole style of it. There are rap songs I love, but in general it's just not for me. What did you last complain about? I actually don't know. Did you ever like nursery rhymes as a child? What was your favorite? I did. I remember liking "The Itsy-Bitsy Spider" as well as that "This Little Piggy" one, whatever its proper name is, because it involved Mom tickling me. What do you usually purchase at gas stations? (aside from gas of course) If I get anything, it's likely to be a certain flavor of Mountain Dew, and then I'll sometimes get a sort of candy. Do you drink regular or diet soda? Only regular. The artificial sweetener in diet sodas gives me a headache, but diet is also just gross imo. What’s one of your favorite artists/bands, and least favorite song from them? All right let's go with Ozzy. There are a few of his songs I'm just sorta "meh" about, but if I remember it correctly, I believe I wasn't into "Diary of a Madman" at all. Have you ever seen them live? Bitch I would cry lmao. I would LOVE to see Ozzy, especially with it being so clear he's in his twilight years with all the health issues he's been fighting. Seeing Ozzy live would without a goddamn doubt be a very strong highlight of my life. Mom and I actually WERE planning on seeing him, all the way in Charlotte, but then that tour had to be cancelled due to the arrival of health problems. Can't say I know if he's planning another, but I would think so with a new album in the future. Do you consider graffiti to be true art or just messy? I mean, it can be both. Depends on where it's at, the content itself, everything. What last overwhelmed you? In a recent survey I mentioned that I don't know what really qualifies as sensory overload, but dear god I think I experienced it at Girt's place when Mom and I went there for an early 4th celebration. SO many people were talking about different things and I was trying to be aware and listen to everyone, but it just wasn't possible. I was so overstimulated with all the noise that I literally didn't even process what my mom was eventually saying directly to me; like I just stared at her blankly and had to come back to just me and her to understand anything. What did you last watch on TV? Girt and I were watching a Five Nights at Freddy's: Security Breach speedrun via YouTube on the TV the other night. We were curious because of the insane amount of glitches in that game how fast you could really do it. Do you know anyone who keeps a Christmas tree up year round? I mean I might, but not that I know of. What’s the strangest video you’ve ever seen? Oh brother, who knows, I've been on the Internet too long. Though I will say I actually haven't seen like... *any* of the notoriously gross and/or shocking videos because I cherish my eyes. They suck, but I cherish them lmao. Have you ever received a present that made you cry? Oh jeez, that's easy to do. Do you know of any haunted buildings in your town? No. I know of a location with false origins that portray it as haunted, but it's just literally not true. What’s the most random song on your playlist that people wouldn’t expect? HAHA at Girt's place, Mom was VERY surprised to learn Brittney Spears is on my iPod lmaooo. When did you last receive a business card from somebody? I haven't the slightest idea. Would you try that Flaming Hot Mountain Dew? ... I do wanna try it... lmaooo. I love both so I mean... leave me alone, haha. When it was first revealed, all the reactions made me feel horrible about myself, ahaha. Do you own any adult coloring books? Yeah, somewhere. What did you last draw or write down? Uh, probably my signature. Have you ever played pinball on a machine or just online? I've played it on machines before. Have you ever had a bad sunburn? I once had sunburn so bad it was actually sun poisoning. It was fucking excruciating.

#lyrics: ''patient no. 9'' by ozzy osbourne #survey #surveys #random questions

[neowinestainedress]

rebs i missed you soo much too but i can’t never find the time to come on this app again cause after i finished my internship they (kinda) hired me so i’m working + classes and doing my thesis and i want to KILL MYSLEF i’m always so tired nowadays and sleeping EVERYWHERE

but god where do i start… first of all i don’t remember if i said this already but CONGRATULATIONS ON GRADUATING I’M SO PROUD OF YOU REBS YOU ARE AMAZING!!! how is life treating you? what are you up to lately?

about the hits different review that i told you about the last time i sent you an ask i think? i still haven’t finished it but i will i SWEAR i was half through it if i remember correctly… i also want and NEED to read your new stories even tho i spoiled myself the other day and saw that mc ends up with jaemin and not haechan 😞 but it’s okay!!! i love jaemin

and now about the things i wanted to tell you!!

1. i saw nct dream in concert and i even got BARRICADE and it was such an amazing experience no one pushed me or anything so i really enjoyed it + i finally met two of my longtime ibf 🥹 but you WON’T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED AT THE CONCERT!!!!

I FINALLY SAW HAECHAN LIVE LIKE HE WAS THE ONLY NEO (except wayv ofc) that i was yet to meet and he was sosososo pretty i wanted to cry i couldn’t believe i was finally meeting the love of my life he was GLOWING (and not because of his sweat or smt like that) even tho he was a little sick i think? cause he wasn’t as playful as usual but i completely understand since he must have been so tired. we made eye contact so many times and i wanted to DIE RIGHT THERE he’s so mesmerizing and sexy and charismatic PLEASE HAECHAN JUST ONE (1) CHANCE like i could talk about him ALL DAY EVERYDAY

it was so funny to me the fact that haechan was the first one to come out when the concert started so he appeared and i SCREAMED SO MUCH i almost threw up within then first 3 minutes 😭😭😭 and the first time he went to dance in front of me and we made eye contact i literally froze ajshskdjsod like no thoughts head empty

mark my bestie (it was the second time in less than a year that i saw him<3) he’s just TOO good and i have THE PERFECT FANCAM of him dancing RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME

renjun is SO TINY and pretty like 🤏🏼 i wanted to hug him

jeno is GORGEOUS LIKE HELLLOO?? WHY ARE YOU SHOWING YOUR FACE FOR FREE FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE??

JAEMIN IS SO BIG HIS TITTIES ARE ENORMOUS and has the MOST big and beautiful smile i’ve ever seen he was so sweet the whole time

haechan is ….. god i could write a whole essay about him he’s just too pretty i spent 99% of the concert only watching him

chenle is so pretty too and so pale (just like jeno) and he did the most amazing adlibs EVER he was literally a cat so playful and cute

jisung………. he’s CRAZY. tiniest waist i’ve ever seen like HELLO WHO ARE YOU??? so sweet too my cutie

the concert was so much fun and they are amazing performers i screamed soooo much i wish i could watch them live everyday and im happy that they didn’t break their promise of coming back soon and with haechan too (for the first time this was his fourth attempt😭) the trauma from november is now gone (lies i won’t ever recover from that time)

2. and here comes the most exciting part and i’m literally exposing my identity rn but…………………………. haechan PICKED UP MY GIFT LIKE HE ACTUALLY TOOK IT WITH HIS OWN TWO HANDS 😭😭😭😭😭😭 and also it was the only gift he actually picked up from the ground since the other two were given to him by mark and jeno (you can search the candy performance in chile and you will see it 😭😭😭😭 kinda sad he didn’t open it since inside the bag was a teddy bear baseball cap + hanging from the zipper a shinchan as michael jackson keychain that took me FOREVER to find)

3. i’m on my way to see aespa right now i’m so excited<3!!!

4. i have a boyfriend… well not really i mean he wants to date me but i don’t feel like i love him enough and i even broke off with him last year but he just really loves me? even though i explained to him how i feel… the bad thing is that i was trying to “date” him secretly but i posted a pic of haechan on my ig that said “love of my life” so everyone started asking me who he was and shit so i had to tell them about my situansionahip because i couldn’t expose myself as a kpoppie 😭😭😭😭😭

and i think that is all about my life lately now tell me about yours rebs 🫂

I get you when I was writing my thesis I was on the brink of suicide too so I hope everything goes well and you can find time to rest!

THANK YOU! I’m struggling to find a job BUT this weekend I have the inauguration of the exhibition of my photos so I hope it brings something good. I’m having some health problems (funny thing, they’re not given by what I have but by the treatment I’m getting to calm down the illness) but overall I’m good.

Yes you did! Omg how much are you writing skdjfmk did it have a bigger impact than the sour series? I’m sorry for the spoilers, I try to wait to reblog but if I don’t answer after a while I just forget about it 💀I’m sure you will love Jaemin in the story!

1. I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU! Finally a non-traumatic experience😭you truly lived your y/n moment omg and he is! I saw him years ago and I still have him impressed in my mind and I wasn’t that close HOW did you NOT pass out?  

👀 Drop the Mark fancam now 👀

You talking about Mark, Jeno, Renjun, Chenle: 🥰💞 the lomls, prettiest boys ever, smoll 🥰💞 You talking about Jaemin and Jisung: !!!BOOBS!!! WAIST!!!

I want to see them live so badly, I hope they can come to Europe (italy because i don't have money to spend on hotels and flights) 😭

no but seriously after everything that happened last time I’m so happy to know this time it was an amazing experience, you deserve it!

2. HE GOT YOUR GIFT OMG OSJDOFJOD you really are the chosen one please share a bit of your luck (no okay I’m convinced that this was destiny/god/universe/whatever you want to call it, paying you back for the trauma of November) is this the video? also how are you alive pt2? no because it must be so thrilling to know he has something you gave him 😭

3. have fun at aespa’s concert! Say hi to my girlfriend Ningning 😔

4. Warn him that if he dares to hurt you I will have to intervene (we’re not doing a traitor pt2) the Haechan thing took me out I’m sorry, it’s so funny 😭😭 but seriously do what feels right for you and don’t feel pressured just because he likes you a lot

About me there’s not much to say. Like I said I’m trying to find a job but I chose the worst field possible so it’s been hard as hell, I thought I found something but then she changed her mind after I did the trial (I was good, I was really good and she was impressed but for some reason she went from ‘being overloaded with work’ to ‘mhh you know how it is, you never know how much work you have, I can’t hire you’ lmao) and now I keep looking for something. But I’m quite fine when I don’t think too much about my future and feel like a failure lol

#answered #💌 anon