#god I’m so tired

[myfriendgoo94]

Bad Bitch 2023 has commenced i guess

#god i’m so tired #it me! #transgender #trans #girlslikeus #this is what trans looks like #trans girl #trans woman #cool to reblog

[suspiciouslackofclowns]

I’m trying to clear out my drafts, so have the alternate version of this <3

Even on quiet days where Eddie should, theoretically, be able to take time to himself, he finds that it’s nearly impossible.

The guys had pulled him aside early on and explained hey, they were mostly cool with Steve, as long as he didn’t talk too much when he was around. Billy was almost completely out of the question. It was kind of an ultimatum, made in the privacy of Gareth’s garage one afternoon.

It’s them or us, is what Eddie took away from it.

Try as he might, Eddie has come to find out the hard way that he can’t keep his two worlds separated. His partners are sure to discover that his friends don’t like them even if he doesn’t say anything, and his friends are stubborn enough to stop inviting him out because of it.

He eventually stops trying so hard to convince Gareth, Jeff, and Grant that his partners are okay dudes, and that turns out to be the right decision.

Because apparently this shit has to happen organically.

As the movie wraps up on screen, Gareth stretches where he sits in the recliner, pausing with his arms in the air like he just realized there’s a lion stalking him. Eddie quirks a brow, confused, until he realizes.

About halfway through the second movie in their marathon, Billy had wandered in soundlessly. Settled beside Eddie on the loveseat and leaned into his side, welcomed with an arm around his shoulders, and promptly dozed off. In all honesty, Eddie kind of forgot that he was there.

He’s been cradling Billy like it’s second nature. Threading his fingers through his hair and scratching softly at his scalp, keeping him humming happily and hugging Eddie like he’s a body pillow.

“Dude,” Gareth hisses.

He dawns a look of tired frustration, and Eddie rolls his eyes.

“What? He’s not bothering you,” he whispers.

Grant and Jeff seem just as caught off guard as Gareth was a moment ago, but Eddie keeps coddling his lover anyway. Even when Gareth narrows his eyes.

“But this is our movie night.”

“I promise you, he hasn’t been watching.”

There’s a moment where nothing is said. The credits are rolling on the screen, and Eddie and Gareth just stare at one another for a long beat. Eddie wants him to say it.

He’s ruining it just by being here.

“Guys, c’mon,” Jeff intervenes. “Let’s just put in the next one, yeah?”

Grant nods enthusiastically, but all efforts of distraction go ignored. Gareth crosses his arms.

“It’s like you don’t like hanging out with just us anymore, man,” he grumbles.

A wave of clarity washes over Eddie in an instant, and he bites back on a smile.

He’s fucking jealous.

“So that’s what this is, huh?” Eddie muses.

“What?” Gareth snaps.

“Y’know, if you actually gave him a chance, you’d probably get along with him. He’s super easy. Easier than Steve, even.”

Grant sits forward at Eddie’s other side, peering around him to get a look at the sleeping blond.

“Steve is more approachable,” he concludes.

Out of the few times that Steve has been around during a game night or a movie marathon, he’s always been awkward. Maybe the guys don’t see it the way that Eddie does, but he tends to talk to them like he talks to Dustin. Lots of things like what’s up, big man are said and nodding is done when he doesn’t understand a reference or joke.

Maybe they think that Steve is just naturally easygoing.

It’s especially funny, because he just so happens to be the most nervous person that Eddie has ever met in his life. He hates being around Eddie’s friends as much as they hate being around him, if for no other reason than he isn’t quite sure how to act around them.

But they don’t need to know that.

“Nah, he just looks a little intimidating, that’s all,” Eddie says, still carding his fingers through Billy’s hair. “He’s a total teddy bear.”

Gareth barks out a laugh, his face paling a bit when Billy stirs at the noise. Clutches onto the front of Eddie’s shirt with an unforgiving grip as he shoves his face further into the crook of his neck.

After he falls still again, his fist relaxing, Eddie gently guides his hand away and smooths out the front of his shirt.

“He’s an aggressive cuddler,” he dismisses.

“Right,” Gareth huffs. “I’m sure he’s sweet to you, Munson, but I don’t really plan on testing the waters with it.”

“Do you really think that little of me?”

“What?”

Eddie presses his lips into a line and sighs. Looks down at Billy’s sleeping face, studying the faint sprinkle of freckles on the bridge of his nose.

“You think my taste in men is so terrible that I’d date any old piece of shit.” Eddie makes pointed eye contact with Gareth, who swallows thickly. “It never occurred to you that maybe, considering I like him, he can’t be all that bad?”

Gareth opens and closes his mouth, and huffs irritatedly after a moment.

“I’m just wary of his type is all.”

Now Eddie laughs, and subsequently deals with Billy clutching at his shirt as if to say keep it down again.

“See, now you’re just doing what the vast majority of people do to us,” Eddie muses. “Kind of hypocritical, no?”

The tv screen goes blank as Jeff removes the tape. He doesn’t reach for the next movie just yet, probably waiting to see how this conversation plays out first.

“In his defense,” he begins. “It’s usually guys like Hargrove that rag on us for being different, so you can’t really blame us for being wary of him.”

Gareth and Grant both nod in agreement. Eddie sighs.

“Fair enough. I’m telling you, though, he’s a sweetheart.”

“I’m gonna need some proof.”

All three of his friends stare at him expectantly. Eddie feels the end of this interaction rapidly approaching until an idea blossoms in his head, and he stops petting Billy’s hair. Lifts his arm up and rests it on the back of the sofa, depriving the blond of contact, and smirking deviously as he begins to stir.

If for no other reason than the guys all look like they’re ready to bolt.

Billy cracks his eyes open, sitting up just enough to peer up at Eddie’s face as he splays a hand against his sternum.

“Was I snoring?” he asks, voice groggy.

Rubs at Eddie’s chest with a heavy hand, looking like he’s fighting to stay conscious as he waits for an answer.

“No,” Eddie says, and resists the urge to chuckle.

Billy sighs. His eyelids are heavy, palm rubbing in circles as he thinks for a moment. Then his eyebrows are furrowing.

“‘M I bothering you?” His movements halt for a moment. “Should I go to the room?”

“No, no, baby, you’re not a bother,” Eddie coos.

Billy nods, but his lips press into a frown as he pouts. Begins rubbing at Eddie’s chest again.

“Then why’d you stop lovin’ on me?”

The question is so earnest and he looks so betrayed while asking it that Eddie can’t help but smile and open his arm around him again. Coaxes Billy back into his side where he’d been pressed before.

Once his face is tucked into Eddie’s neck again, he melts instantly. Slumps into the brunet and hums a happy noise when fingers push into his hair once again.

“I’m sorry, Bills, I’ll keep loving on you.”

Billy drapes his arms around him. Gives him a squeeze before his muscles are all going limp, and Eddie is left scratching softly at his scalp as his breath evens out.

As if having proven his point, Eddie fixes Gareth with a look.

“Teddy bear,” he whispers.

Maybe he should’ve let Billy’s actions speak for themselves a long time ago, because the air of fear is no longer present in the room. Simply because Billy is all but purring and snuggling as hard as he can into Eddie’s side like a clingy cat.

“Dunno why, but I thought he’d be the type to get pissed about being woken up,” Grant says quietly.

Eddie hums amusedly. Tilts his head against Billy’s and noses a kiss into his hair.

“He’s normally a little moody in the mornings,” Eddie says. Keeps his nose buried in blond curls as he breathes a dreamy sigh. “It’s nothing that pancakes and coffee with extra creamer and sugar can’t fix, though.”

For once, when Eddie glances over, Gareth doesn’t look beyond pissed off. His expression is more neutral now, and it stays that way even when a door closes somewhere beyond the kitchen.

Steve pads into the living room, rubbing one of his eyes with the heel of his palm, and comes to stand beside the couch. Spreads a smile when he spies the couple on the sofa.

“I was wondering where he went,” he muses.

“Were you not cuddling him good enough or something? He’s been in here for a while,” Eddie chuckles.

Steve puts his hands on his hips and tilts his head to the side.

“I think he just missed you.” He sits on the armrest and reaches over, gently tucking Billy’s hair behind his ear. “Kept feeling your side of the bed and grumbling when you weren’t there.”

The information has a pang of sadness piercing Eddie’s chest. He holds Billy tighter and squeezes a surprised little grunt out of him, but the blond is quick to reciprocate. Nuzzles his face harder into Eddie’s neck and leans more heavily into his side.

“Did you come out here to take him back?” Eddie asks.

He flushes a bit red when he hears the shake in his own voice. Steve spreads a sympathetic smile.

“I figured, since…” he trails off, gesturing loosely around the living room. “You’d, y’know, want the room to yourselves.”

Eddie pouts at the thought of his sleepy boyfriend getting taken away. Momentarily considers calling it quits for the night so he can go snuggle Billy in the comfort of their bed, until Gareth clears his throat.

“It’s alright if he stays, or whatever.”

All eyes snap to him, and he crosses his arms over his chest nonchalantly. Eddie bites back on a grin, especially when he looks around and doesn’t see that either Grant or Jeff protest the claim.

Steve sighs and stands up.

“You okay if he stays?” he asks.

“Mhmm,” Eddie hums. Keeps his eyes on Steve as he rounds the sofa and leans over the back of it, draping his arms around Eddie’s neck. “You can stay too, if you want.”

Slender fingers tilt his chin up, and they meet in a soft kiss. Only parting when their smiles ruin it.

“You’re such a good boyfriend,” Steve coos.

“Yeah?”

“Uh-huh.” Another kiss is planted on Eddie’s lips, and he can’t help but melt a little. “I’m gonna pass, though. Pretty sure you guys wouldn’t appreciate me snoring over the movie.”

Steve chuckles when Eddie pouts, leaning down to smudge a few kisses in Billy’s hair before he turns to pad out of the room.

“Goodnight, Stevie,” Eddie calls. “Love you.”

“Mm, love you, Stevie,” Billy grumbles.

In an instant, Steve is leaning over the back of the couch again and smothering them both in more hastily-placed kisses. Billy spreads a lazy smile and Eddie giggles until their lover ceases the affectionate burst.

“Hurry up and finish your movie night so I can cuddle with my boys,” Steve says.

Eddie hums when he’s given a squeeze for emphasis from Billy.

“Yes sir.”

#harringroveson #metalsandwich #steddilly #rewrite? ish #fluff #mild angst #billy hargrove #eddie munson #steve harrington #background corroded coffin guys #I didn’t think I’d post this version but I’m tired of seeing it sit in my drafts #so here it is! the same-ish ficlet again minus chubby Billy bc I was too nervous to add him in #my writing #ficlet #god i’m so tired

[thee-radio-host-is-a-kookaburra]

it’s honestly exhausting and really mentally destroying to face transandrophobia in the real world, see articles on how i’m just a brainwashed autistic girl, be told i’m an attention seeking fujo, get called slurs, be afraid to use the bathroom in fear of being assaulted, be called both a predator and a victim by terfs and transphobes, get told how evil i’ll become when i transition, constantly afraid of being clocked, be treated as both a lost girl and/or a dangerous man whenever it’s convenient for whatever argument is going on, etc etc etc etc etc…

and then i come online to get away from it all and am greeted with posts saying things like “cuntboys don’t face discrimination”.

#it’s so mentally draining #transandrophobia #queer community be normal to trans men challenge #anti transmasculinity #constantly afraid of being killed by cis ppl only to see my fellow trans ppl wishing death on me #god i’m so tired #some of you guys genuinely need a wake up call #hey. they’re KILLING us. okay? KILLING us. they don’t care if you’re a radfem as well as a trans person. okay? #different experiences =/= one group has it better other has it worse #so many of u guys have drank the radfem “all men privileged no matter what” kool-aid and don’t even realize it #cb slur

[quotidianish]

Barely coherentHuman au nonsense

#god I’m so tired #wings of fire #WoF #hwof #Qinter #or whatever #WoF au #WoF art #WoF fanart #Jade winglet #no ship tag for winter and kinkajou. day ruined #actually that’s the least egregious part of today #whatever dude I’m going to sleep #quotidianish

[tbhkquoteveryday]

March 7th

“I’m the ruler of this place…I…I became one of those ‘Seven Mysteries” things!!!”

Mitsuba to Nene, chapter 35

#god I’m so tired #gonna go to bed after queuing this and just AGGHHHH I’m tired #tbhkquoteseveryday #tbhkquoteveryday #tbhk #toilet bound hanako kun #Jshk #jibaku shounen hanako kun #mitsuba sousuke #nene yashiro

[milfgyuu]

Here’s a thought. What kind of demon would S.Coups be?

babe. i put this in my drafts and forgot about it. for like. months. i got so excited i tried to respond when i didn’t actually have time and then poof. cheese grater brain.

so anyways -

(u know i’m sensitive how could u ask this?) but he’s domineering and commands attention. he pops into a room, filling it with thick whorls of black smoke and doesn’t blanket his power for anyone bc he’ll always be the most powerful being in the room and wants everyone to know it. he doesn’t make deals with pretty words and twisted truths. he’ll tell you exactly what it will cost and you’ll sign it all away to him anyhow. a legend for his cold, calculating exterior - even with his over abundance of power he’s not know to brag or gloat. he’s not cocky or smug. he doesn’t tease or taunt. he doesn’t have to. he does not deign to entertain and certainly does not bend to anyone’s will - no one at all.

unless you’re the one waiting for him at home where he drags his feet through the door and flops face first into the bed seeking warmth, and peace, and comfort. he hums into your shirt, wiggling closer until he feels your fingers in his hair and when he relaxes into your touch almost immediately the demonic energy coming off of him in waves quiets, falling all around you in pliant little puddles of dark magic.

bc cheol is the big bad scary demon who needs love too.

#god i’m so tired #where is MY fictional demon lover that would burn the world down for me #that coNVIENTLY looks like cheol #it’s not even a big ask universe #gimme #pocket bb aya 💕 #choi seungcheol #svt

[buttcrackatoa-art]

Pink Diamond

I’m pretty proud of how this one came out!

#steven universe #artwork #digital art #steven universe fanart #pink diamond #pink diamond steven universe #god i’m so tired

[idkfitememate]

Still a wee bit outta it (also schools been beating my ass-) but I had this idea and I couldn’t get it outta my mind-

“So… you’re the wee lil’ brat that man ‘as picked up huh.”

Ciel had actually and literally never been spoken to before like that by a man dressed in serving clothes.

Before him stood a taller male dressed like a butler - akin to Sebastian’s own dress - with dirty and deep green hair that teetered on emerald. Bright green eyes with hints of red peered into his one eye behind a pair of chain glasses with fish bone decorations. A wide smile, filled with sharp, pearly white teeth was the finishing touch.

Behind him stood a woman with deep brown hair that near reached her ankles. Her maids dress complemented the suit the male before her stood. Her eyes were so deep in brown color that they looked black. And no matter how he looked, Ciel could not find an angle that would fill her eyes with light, making them as blank as a void. Her eyes were wide, as though in shock, but her lips were poised in a small smile.

“… Who are you.” The boy questioned.

“Heh, don’ worry about it mate, you’d not even be able to say me name! Neither could you for this lass!” The males grin widened as he wrapped an arm around her waist, allowing her to nuzzle into his side, though her dark eyes never left Ciel’s blue ones.

“But… I suppose f’ ya need ta call us by somethin’… I’d say call me “Piranha” and her “Centipede”, I’ll assume you can figure out why hehe…”

Piranha’s grin widened as he stared down at the boy, who shivered in response.

“You’re demons…” He responded, only to be met with harsh laughter from the greenette. He wiped a tear from his eye as he nodded.

“Ey young one, we do be demons!”

Ciel stated before speaking once more.

“What is it you want from me?.. And I am to assume by “that man”, you mean Sebastian?”

“That I do, young one! Didn’t know ‘is new name since the bastard ‘ans’t visited us since ‘e’s been with ya!”

Ciel new damn well he should call said demon at this point, but here was a chance to learn something about him without the demons knowledge, but before he could even ask, Centipede spoke up for the first time.

“No, you cannot just ask any question, young one… well… hmm, I suppose one couldn’t hurt, could it my love?” Her gaze - for the first time - broke away from Ciel’s since their sudden meeting. Hell at this point, he forgot why he was even alone in the first place.

“Hmmm… I suppose one couldn’t hurt, me lil’ black rose. What is it young one? This is a one time offer, free of charge!~ Probably the only time you’ll ever get somethin’ like this from a demon hehe!~” Piranha leaned in, his nose nearly touching Ciel’s.

Befit he could even speak, Centipede took a small pocket watch out from… somewhere, and opened it teasingly, her gaze locking back onto his.

“Tick tock..~” She mused.

A chuckle wrung from Piranha’s throat.

The laughter only grew as did the frequency and volume that Centipede spoke the words “Tick tock”, and both only grew louder and faster and harder, until Ciel blurted out:

“HIS NAME!! W-what were you saying about your… names..?” The boy cursed himself out in his head. Really?! His butlers name?!?! That was the best he could come up with??? Damn it all and damn him at that!

Piranha couldn’t help but laugh even louder at his predicament, but Centipede seemed to take it seriously.

“His name?.. Demon names do not naturally translate, as I am sure you know, but I shall do my best to answer…” She drifted off into thought as her male counterpart’s laughter died down, muttering about how “I forgot she takes this sort of stuff so damn serious…”

Then she suddenly snapped her fingers.

“His name may be best translated as this: Flocks of thousands of crows over a dead mountain range filled with snow. A blood moon rising as pure black feathers fall to the ground into the untouched powder, many crows land to consume the flesh of travelers who have dies to frostbite under the pretense of glorious treasurers and fortune, only to fall to the frosted death the was truly promised when they foolishly left their wives and children for adventure and and fortunes. The sounds of crow cries echoing through the forest as many swarm the corpses of fallen men, pecking at their frozen flesh, picking at what they can to satiate their never ending hunger, few resting in the trees to watch over their brethren. Under the light of the moon, the crows eat well tonight.”

As soon as Centipede finished, Piranha clapped lightly as Ciel gaped.

How was that… there was no way… how was that a name?!?!

“Our names tend to reflect what we represent, young one.” The older male began to explain. “All demons hold a different title if strong enough - AKA the ones summoned at least - like ya darling Crow Demon.~” He smirked.

“What… are your names?” He allowed himself this childish curiosity once. This was good information and-

“This is fun, so I shall delve into others, such as The Sheath and The Spider.” Centipede began.

“I… don’t think we’d have enough time, me darlin’. How about ya just stick ta us f’ now? Hehe…” Piranha gently shook the slightly shorter woman, who only nodded.

“Duly noted. I shall start with you then, my love.”

She cleared her throat.

“My love’s name is that of the deepest depths of the ocean, surrounded on all sides by darkness and the salty taste of the sea filling mankind’s lungs. The sounds of the currents guiding the fallen bodies of sailors through the depths, clothes tearing off their forms as the pressure settles into their weary bones, before their blood spills into the water, the scent attracting a swarm of deep green piranha. The swarm swimming faster and faster around corpses, the blood disappearing into a blinding ball of greens and reds, meshing into the dark background. The sounds of bodies exploding under the crushing weight of the sea. Something from the deep swims up, a larger piranha swimming through the group, taking large bites out of the desecrated corpse of a man who sailed far from shore into untamable waters. Bones of man fall swiftly down into the dark depths below.”

Piranha suddenly wrapped his arms around Centipede, picking her up and swinging her around. His laughter bubbled up again, though this time softer.

“Ey, ya flatter me, me dear! I almost feel as though you embellished the truth a wee bit hehe!~” On top of the soft laughter, his sinister smile had softened as well.

Centipede giggled as she leaned into the man, pressing her thin lips to his cheek. His pale skin flushed.

Ciel stared with a disgusted look on his face. He didn’t care to think of demons could experience emotions other than rage and hunger, but seeing these two act so fucking lovey-dovey was making his stomach do flips in the bad way. He nearly gagged honestly.

Piranha dug in a pocket on Centipede’s dress for a moment before pulling out the same pocket watch she had held only a few minutes before, and now that Ciel could see it, it was embellished with small centipedes. Fitting.

Glancing at the clock, Piranha sighed. He wrapped an arm around Centipede’s butt and lifted her. She practically sat on his arm while her own rested around his neck. He looked back at Ciel and grinned once more.

His grin really hadn’t dropped in the entire time they had spoken.

“Welp, that’s our time young one, we best be off. Now, don’t go pissin’ ole “Sebastian” off to bad hehe! Or at least call me when ya do!~” He wrapped his other arm around his partners waist, and jumped up, scaling the building they stood next. Ciel watched as the two jumped away into the night.

“Young Master? Now why ever would you be in an alley like this?” Sebastian mused as he walked towards the tired Ciel.

“… I believe I have met two friends of you, actually. A Piranha and a Centipede.”

Ciel walked towards the entrance of the alley as Sebastian stood back, eyes widened by a fraction.

“… I see…”

And with that, the two continued on their merry way, Sebastian making a note to find and speak to these two “friends” of his.

Lmao I’m so fucking tired I had so many fucking tests this week ugh I’m gonna collapse ໒꒰ྀིっ˕ -｡꒱ྀི১

#black butler #god i’m so tired #mmm Black Butler content mmm… #This orange I’m eating is so gd bitter what-

[eepy-boy-slumber]

TRANSPHOBIC DAD ALERT

So my dad sent me 40+ messages about how me being nonbinary is bad in one way or another at 1am yesterday

(l'd say the images sum the whole speech up)

I'm posting his email now because I'm sick of being the bigger person.

I'm 15. He's an adult with two whole kids.

Im so tired and him saying I'm not allowed near my little sister as long as I "choose" to be nonbinary was my breaking point.

Do whatever the fuck you want with it:

[email protected]

#nonbinary #transgender #gender nonconforming #tw: homophobia #tw: transphobia #tw verbal abuse #my best guess is he was either drunk or high off his ass #Wouldn’t suprise me #god i’m so tired #i can’t keep fucking doing this

[smallpwbbles]

I was already going mental at Rise being “paused” but when I say all these beloved shows being wiped from the face of the earth is making me wanna start my villain arc

#I just saw a pic from Parker simmons of the Mao crew with their backs packed and I felt primal urge like no other #god I’m so tired #it hurts my SOUL watching creators be treated dirty #imagine getting this news on fucking Twitter before anything else #hbo max

[mr-up-on-a-downer]

took a nice dick pic too just for my own satisfaction that I will not share with anyone. fuck y’all no one deserves me

#god I’m so tired

[amazingmsme]

Dude I love your stuff but I think you have got to stop putting your stuff in the main fandom tags people are being major assholes and honestly I’ve seen enough people just the past few days attacking the whole community and while I’ve been blocking them I do not need people harassing the account I’ve sent asks on here, yknow? But remember there are people out here you support you, god forbid others realize we aren’t some sorta sexual freaks and just enjoy niche fanfic.

It fucking sucks because like, I want to be able to keep my blog sorted by fandom, but there’s been such a spike in hate & negativity, & it just makes me feel super shitty & insecure, & I hate feeling like that about something I want to enjoy because this is literally my single outlet for it, but Jesus am I starting to feel bogged down & just tired

Don’t be surprised if you start seeing me post less & less, I’m still here, it’s just burnout starting to take its toll I’m not dumb enough to think it wasn’t made worse by all this shit

I’ll still be chipping away at my asks, & I am gonna get back to those sentence prompts, I just gotta let myself marinate & take some time to stop thinking

I appreciate your concern, thanks for checking in. I just wish those people would just leave us the fuck alone if they don’t vibe with it, like please for the love of God just ignore or block us, it’s not that hard & I promise literally everyone will be happier

#asks #anon ask #tfb community #god i’m so tired #i just feel so hopeless sometimes #not just this #but just everything in general

[ciderjacks]

Community characters ranked from most to least likely to drink perfume (and why)

Britta, didn’t read the label and assumed it was alcohol

Troy, wanted to see if it would taste good

Pierce, wanted to see if he Could

Jeff, same reason as Britta

Shirley, same reason as Britta

Abed, was roped into it by Troy

Annie, same reason as Abed

#community #greendale seven #god i’m so tired

[theliheat]

help i was at work for so fucking long and my job is horrendous anyway and now i’m home and i’m all lonely and sad lmao pls someone tell me headcannons ab ur favorite characters pls and thx luv u babies :’)

#li’s expressions #god i’m so tired #wanda maximoff x reader #bucky barnes x reader #eddie munson x reader #steve harrington x reader #robin buckley x reader #or literally any character i just wanna giggle at the sillies #tysm babies <3

[mahoganystudios830]

Hey everyone! I’m switching fully from Instagram to here. Meta (or Facebook, who fucking cares) is using our art and photos to create AI content, and I don’t stand for that shit.

Fuck you, Meta, and fuck your AI too.

Ps. I’m also being stalked on insta so this is an absolute win!

#art #ai art #ai art is not art #ai art is art theft #ai art is stolen art #ai #fuck ai art #fuck ai #artificial intelligence #god i’m so tired

[heraldofcrow]

I saw your ff7 vs bb meme and now I am curious

who do you like more, Bloody crow or Sephiroth? 🤣

mother of god, if that ain’t the question of the year. um.

I’ll choose the best answer and just say Eileen the Crow because she wins and most likely wouldn’t try to kill me if she was real, so there, I’m free. Yipeeee!!!

Ok fineeeee—a specific answer just for you:

Bloody Crow wins by default because Soulsborne is just my “home” fandom forever. Besides LOTR ofc. But that fandom is too big and old for me to feel like I could find a secure space, so Soulsborne it is and has been for years. I just live here, and Crow is the only Soulsborne character besides Lady Maria, Eileen, and Ciaran that I really, really went to work for in terms of developing a backstory and complicated personality for. He is more like an original character at this point for me specifically, and so very precious. My crow boi <3

Sephiroth is weird because he feels like a character I have been looking for or “knew” for years, but it doesn’t make sense lol. I grew up surrounded by friends that loved FF7 and I never got it…I guess?

In fact, I actually didn’t like it sjdhshs. I admittedly judged by appearance, but I was like, “The characters all look like these bizarre supermodel action figures with oversized weapons!!”

Meanwhile, my hypocritical ass with Soulsborne:

“It’s peak game design.”

But I really did not like Final Fantasy or FF7. I would see Sephiroth around, specifically the shot of him surrounded by flames from Advent Children, and just think, “There’s that fucking guy again” and I ignored him. I didn’t figure out until later that the reason he pissed me off so much is because I knew, I just absolutely knew, that if I gave him my attention for longer than five seconds, he would probably take over my life. Help.

I was terrified. I even remember seeing some of the Remake trailers a few years back and actually hearing some of his lines for the first time, and I kid you not, I felt the slightest pull of, “Wait…” and then IMMEDIATELY went, “Nope, fuck you” in my head and walked away 💀

My reaction to him was always incredibly visceral, so naturally, one night I was having a chill discussion with my friend ABOUT BLOODY CROW from Bloodborne and somehow we ended up making a Sephiroth comparison of course, and then it happened.

I was like, “Oh hahaha yeah Sephiroth, that guy. Let me watch some clips to remember what he’s all about again, hahahaa.”

Hours passed and I didn’t sleep that night, like at all. I watched every available canonical cutscene video compilation of Sephiroth on the internet and read every bit of information I could find and immediately started playing the FF7 games and reading fan-fiction and listening to One-Winged Angel for entire days on repeat and talking with people on tumblr and twitter and researching for seven days without sleep until I emerged to burn down a small village and AAAAA—so yeah.

I was freaking out, like literally trying to tell myself to stop as I just kept falling down the rabbit hole. I was so mad. It took over 20 years but I finally caved and here we are. I’m not okay. This character actually makes me insane, and believe it or not, it’s not even simping. I’m aroace as hell and pretty impervious. He just gives me brain severe damage for weirdly personal reasons. Lmao.

I’m honestly shocked with my level of self-control because I want to write essays on the character but I just stay pretty quiet.

So anyway, I guess I just like characters with silver hair :)))

Much love, anon <3

#god i’m so tired #sorry anon gfdhyjus #it was a simple question but i am bursting at the seams here #see i am writing Crow myself so he is just forever special but i rarely have had an actually developed character affect me so specifically #i don’t…get to have this very often?? I guess?? like characters other people have written that i actually have a personal connection to?? #it’s either that or i’m just reliving my 10 year old self’s obsession with vader/anakin skywalker again because i loved villains as a kid #who knows #anyway i’m normal #lol #asks #anonymous #bloody crow of cainhurst #sephiroth #ff7 vs bloodborne #fandom stuff