#fucjing just im sick

[fuck-spock]

okay some of yall are just ignoring natives at this point where is the outcry??? how loud do we have to scream? how many of us have to go missing or be found dead before you start screaming with us?

please sign the petition to let us keep our children! and educate yourself on the true history of turtle island: hint, you gotta talk to real natives to get the true story. history is written by the victors.

#im sick and tired of having to be so loud just tk be ignored #my people are being attacked #our children are being taken #it is legal for us to be killed by whites off the rez. please will you fucjing help us already? #ndn #native #i was stolen from my culture and trust me it leaves such a vacancy in your soul #every day i wake up thinking about how we were nearly killed out #and how our home has been over run and poisoned with chemicals #im gonna smoke some weed and calm down now but just know i am always angry aboit yhis #ughhhhhhh i need some peace

[lotus-pear]

guys idk about you but i am NOT ready to delve into uncharted waters as we move into new content with bsd in the upcoming chapter.

this new chapter could include anywhere from ada reunion and a return back to yokohama OR to a new horrible twist after fyodor’s death, ensuring that if he lost then dazai would too. taking dazai down with him.

not to mention if we return back to yokohama that’s a whole other gut wrenching story as one ada member is selected to go to the port mafia. i am not ready to see the futile and tragic looks on the other agency members as they grit their teeth and watch one of their own step into the world of darkness. the tragedy of letting someone go after they have all reconciled. being separated again, but for good this time

#AND AND HOLD ON……….IF ITS DAZAI OR YOSANO???? #DAZAI MIGHT JUST GO TO SAVE YOSANO. #NOTICE HOW HES BECOMING MORE SELF SACRIFICAL AND READY TO DIE FOR THE ADA?? ESP DURING MEURSAULT #MORI KEPT DAZAI’S EXECUTIVE SEAT OPEN. HE HAS BEEN KEEPING IT OPEN SINCE DAZAI WAS EIGHTEEN AND FLED THE MAFIA #guys if dazai is the one chosen to go back to the pm do you fucking realize that i will kill myself #his whole redemption arc….EVERYTHING he has done up until now to wrench himself free of the shadows of his past that still cling to him… #….ITS ALL GOING TO BE FOR NOTHING. IT IS HIS WORST POSSIBLE OUTCOME. HIS DETHRONING. HIS FALL. #im going to be sick im not fucjing ready im not ready for this I CANT DO THIS #bungou stray dogs #bsd

[stardustvanfleet]

bro……………… work rant below. i’m so angry

#the owner and manager at the restaurant i work at just sent me the fucjing meanest rudest most disrespectful messages. #i am so upset. i am shaking. i don’t know what to do. #NEWSFLASH!!! it’s not fucking PUSHY to need to know if you’re being FORCED to wait tables WHILE YOU’RE SICK. #especially if you’ve been waiting for an answer for AN HOUR AND A HALF! #IM COUGHING EVERYWHERE. i NEED to know if i have TIME to NAP and GO TO THE DOCTOR #i’m so fucking angry. oh my god. i’m done. i’m leaving this fucking restaurant #li speaks

[dreamcast-official]

i fucking hate school my guy i cannot wait for this to be over november 30th cant come soon enough. when does it fucking END

#eli.txt #LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME O #i am two seconds away from screaming out loud in real life and causing a scene and punching something i want to break my desk in half #i want to get out of this school and never come back i dont want to wait until november for that can this shit please just be over im so #im tired im sick i dont want to do this anymore im fucking miserable i just. #i have so much shit to do. just so fucking much. its taking a very serious toll on me #im exhausted all the time i dont fucjing DO anything because how could i when i have to be here every day. #im so tired im so tired

[tony-andonuts]

People who put romance over friendships and boldly categorise what romance is and isnt are all cringe imo

#idk just sick and tired of third wheeling every fucking interaction #like holy fucking shit can yall stop for 2 fucking minutes #smfh my fucking head #it makes me feel like im only aroubd for superficial reasons tbh #shut up tony #cant wait to get the fucj out of here and have other aromantic friends #this post is rat proof

[legobabyofficial]

well i have my kids stomach flu, made a fool of myself at work today, and want to die

#i just came back from a long weekend and didnt feel well but there was a ton of shit i HAD to do this morning #and then i had a 1:1 with my boss and she spent the first 10 minutes just fucking. rattling off every single thing i had done wrong #and like there WAS some stuff that needed to be dine differently #but then she started talking about a metric that i genuinely CANNOT DO ANYTHING ABOUT because my team is SEVERELT understaffed and i just. #i started fucking crying. #because its too much pressure #and this past weekend was supposed to be really restful and good for me. #and my kid got sick. #and my husband had to work 3 doubles in a row. #so what was supposed to be a mental health vacation turned into solo parenting a sick kid #all while worrying about the work that was building up for me #and she told me that the numbers we'e putting out were unacceptable and i just. it broke me man #ive been throwing up all morning then i get chewed out for my 4 person staff not being able to do the work of 8..... #it just fucking broke me man #then she told me to just log off and that i shouldnt have been working if i were sick and fuck man #i feel so small and shitty #and bad at my job #im fucjing spiraling yall sorry

[wabblebees]

.

#hey yall. feels weird to ask but if u can please send me some good vibes + wish me luck the next few days #tomorrow is opening night for the musical and im SO FUCJING excited but i also woke up in. real bad shape today #my joints feel like shit (collapsed next to my bed trying to get up this morning bc my knees gave out!! haha!!) and im brain-foggy as HELL #and my housemate just let me know theyre sick but the campus health centre couldnt tell what they have. sooooo. im freakin out a lil bit #especially bc one of my castmates told me yesterday -- so casually!! so easy so nonchalant!! -- that THEIR housemate has covid CURRENTLY #but ''dont worry haha! i wasnt exposed and i feel fine and ive been testing negative everyday so i think im okay haha'' #so. yeah. #just a lil freaked out. just a bit!! #otherwise im feelin okay ?? i think ?? nervous as HELL but i've got a 5hr+ rehearsal tonight to get all the jitters/problems outta the way #just worried that im gonna fuck up my voice or my knees or my lines or. you get the idea lmao #anyway. gonna go sit in the sun + recharge a bit before i start stretch & eat & run to the theatre for the night #hope the next few days are kind to yall too<3<3 #bee speaks

[gonfrees]

seems like we are at the crying part of the illness.

#we can postpone cjristmas #gonna talk in da tags for a bit because a post full of perosmal info feels so gross #ive been crying on and off for hours. km so upset being atuck in my fucking room with covid while nobody else is sick at all #and im glad nonody is sick im just so fucking lonely #started symptoms on friday #twsted neg fri and sat. didnt test sundah cause i dont have a lot. tested monday and was psorive #literally slept with my bf all of those nights #shared weed pen on sunday with ofher roommate #nobody else is sick #i just feel so sad and tired. im used to himan or cat affection daily and ive had none. i feel so lonley and trapped #i did everythjng right to avoid being sick and my bf was also with me that whole day and he didnt get sick #i feel stupid weak and pathetic for gettinf sixk. i dont have symptoms anymore but atill positive #im so fucking sad and i can hear people hanging out and they are havjng fun and im glad but im jealous #im so sad and lonely. i want to wrap things for christmas and do more stockjng sruffer shopping. i want to watch movjes with people #i love holidays because i love to hang out with my friends and i fucking cant amd today especially its really tearing me up #my bf is upset that im no communicating and hes trying to cheer me up but everything is making me misribke and i dont know how to stop it #i like to do things for people when theyre sick and i know everyone isnt like me but it hurts to not have that done for me #offering to order food is nice bjt j want skmething made for me but nkbody is as good as i am at making things and i dont want to ask #i dont want to bother people but im literally breakkng down today. cant atop fucjing crying and i feel weak and pathetic. stupid #i tried so hard not to get sick and they are saying o dont want to fucking do that #id rather everyone open stockjngs and do presents without me because im tired of not saying what i got people i want tk show people #i like wrapping gifts and nobody wants me to toich anything because of cocid so others are wrapping things from me for me #i dont know its all very stupid but i feel very alone but also dont want people joking at me to make me feel better. im just mad and sad #ok im done now:) ill post a drawing later #nap time #text

[freshmeatz]

fun leech information of the day even if it's too personal I given my heart out on a platter constantly and I just cant bother to care anymore

#everything went into a stasis for me when i was 15 #and what i mean by that is when ive basically ripped myself apart over and over again ive basically become someone i cant even recognize #anymore at all #i dont feel my age despite needing to be im scared of everything and everyone i dont feel like an adult and i still feel like #im stuck being 15 in my head everyone before me everyone after me ive lost myself on the internet and i will always become situated as a mem #Memory of what i use to be and it fuckinfnsucks i dont feel right in my body i dont feel right in my head and i kust feel fuckinfnstupid all #the time everyday every night #recent events from maybe last year resedimented this fear and i fucking resent what happened but its all too late anyways #i feel sick of kyself im tired and all inwant tondo is spend time with people because i cant stand being alone but that means always exposin #exposing my innards my heart and my mind because thats all i ever did as a kid growing up online #i dint know who i am anymore im just leech now or something I don't knownehy im pouring mybheart out like thisni fell so stupid but i just #cant fucking get a grasp on myself i had to force msyelf to grow up and now im fucjing Violently regressing backwards and its just getting #to the point i wanna scream and cry my eyes out i hate that i dont feel secure anymore I hate how clingy i am i hate thag im liek this

[petrichxriii]

I told myself i wouldn't get got by abic i got got so quickly

Something abt ppl unable to be together gets to me ysee

#i feel sick rn and rlly sleepy im willing myself to get into a abic delirium instead of anything else #ugh. its the way they could be so happy together but they CANT and theyre counting on the other 2 push them away and they DONT #seriously nye fucjing killed meeeeee oh. to pretend a kiss was just that. a simple kiss and not a confession of the love ive carried for u #and oh to be able to ask for more instead lets pretend we dont see whats behind each others eyes

[wondergirl]

my uni keeps trying to fucking call me to ask like how im going with the semester or some shit and im SICK of it bitch im not picking up my phone !!!!!! on purpose !!

#.txt #i am NOT SATISFIED with my experiences fucj off\ #not the call persons fault im sure they dont care either im just sick of it and the follow up emails

[homo-house]

i am losing. It

#i have three different appointments tomorrow which I feel I should prepare for but I can't #because of a multitude of things #first of all that my room is dirty and i myself am dirty... and i have been struggling with doing anything at all for a month because of it #its not the worst but any amount of dirty is too much for me its enough that i dont know where to begin but my threshold is low #so that means even just five things out of place can and will drive me insane from choice paralysis #i feel so filthy for existing really #anyways the second thing is i cant start preparing for the meetings before i finish this one thing ive been putting off for a month #i juat have to edit a text i wrote based on a tutor's feedback which i received last month but havent opened yet because im so terrified!! #so far 9ve read one page out of like 7 and im scared of going further #its so pathetic but i genuinely feel i need someone to hold my hand so i can open this thing #and third. third im just plain anxious for tomorrow because i will be seeing my profs + parental figures for the first time in 2 months #and i want to be presentable... and to behave properly and contribute meaningfully. to the meeting #BUT IM SCARED!!! im always so scared of everything im so scared of meeting with people i love #im scared of disappointing them etc #Hjhh why why why. why cant i heal faster why cant i be normal #im sickkkk im sick of being sick of being mentally ill im fighting demons just to stay awake!!!! fuck!!! fucj

[chromecries]

thinking . about spiderbit specifically

#havent thought about them in such a long time but it's just hit me in the stomach at 3am and i feel SICK ... #the early days where the yearning was so fucjing intense im gonna throw up. all qcellbit wanted was qroier be cared about nothing else . #to love like that............ ougfgc #chrome cries

[whilomm]

unfortunately i am once again having my periodic "oh god i need to burn it all down and start fresh" thoughts regarding my blog. i will try to resist at least until i move into my new apartment to see if this is just my apartment anxiety bleeding into my Oh God Im A Person anxiety but. if this blog disappears ill probably keep the same name at least so. if that happens and anyone cares enough to follow me again just search whilomm again. and hopefully it wont be so impulsive that i dont give a warning.

eh, might be able to resist this time but. well, ive done it like 4 times before so. its bound to happen again eventually!! the question is When.

#buzzy #current anxiety levels are: spent all day nauseous and woke up at 4 a.m. before a closing shift #and when i finally went to eat lunch (at like 2 pm when i had my breakfast at 6 am on account of. waking up) #i could barely choke the actual nutritious part down cause i just felt Sick #so i. mostly ate bread. i tried at least!!! #note to self bring Easy Food tomorrow #just in case the anxiety continues #god i wish i had that med that helped w my heart rate still ive been having. too many heart palpatations lately. #'oh i dont need this anymore my anxiety is under control :)' THAT WAS A FUCJING LIE #anyway. yeah ive remade like. 4 times or some shit i forget. just seeing that theres such an Archive of my stupidity #i hate it!! #'oh congrats youve made x many posts' DONT TELL ME THAT TUMBLR THAT JUST MAKES ME WANT TO BURN IT TO THE GROUND #god i am such a fuck up #wheeeeeeee #'hey i want attention why idnt anyone giving me attention wheres my numbers go up' #people: (give attention) #numbers: (goes up) #'OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD IM CREATING AN ARCHIVE AAAAASA

[blitzgamev]

What the FUCK are these gross ass ads about cleaning ears and fucked up feet get me the fuck out of here

#i just wanted to look at pretty art now i feel sick :/ #guess im fucjing leavin its every third fucjing post #where is the sword lady get her back #shut up blitz

[siinlight]

Sooo funny when my coworker expects us to want to cover his shift when he's "sick" when he was very definitely out all night and literally was doing a drag show last night ???? Like if you work that next day why are you fucking around with substances like boo hoo your fake sick cause your hungover you did that to yourself

#why would i want to take ome of your only shifts too jfc he hardly works and acts all mad when his schedule is fucked like maybe dont call #call in and request off every fucjing day and your schedule would be more regular #i mean this with my whole chest i jave no fucking sympathy or what ever the fuck for these teenagers who are so irresponsible with their s #schedule and then cry and complain that they arent gettign enough hours like what??? yoU are literally doing this to yourself #newsflash when you work only one of the days that your scheduled and then call off the rest of themyou dont make money!!!! #these 19 yr olds with no fucking bills or responsibilities other than their fucking gas acting like they have so many responsibilities #money wise like im soooo tired of it i just dont care i dontcare AT ALLLLLLLL #stop fucking whinjng and go to work this place is one of the easiest fucking service jobs you could have and tbey still manage to act #like its the hardest thing in the world #like No noone is going to cover your shift 2 hours before youre supposed to go in when youre obviously just hungover suck it up and just go #its idiotic to get fucked up if you work the next day like seriously are you fucking dumb #im sick :((( oh whay the fuck ever oh my goooddddd #delete later uh it just irritated me to read thay shit #like were fucking stupid or whatever