What is your favourite thing about Billie Lurk?
(Answers are obvious possibly but i love when people talk about her👍)
thanks for the ask!! YEAH ME TOO I love when people talk about Billie! I can't say I have a favourite thing specifically, but I can explain why she's my fav. apologies for not taking this qn literally, but -
short answer: she’s really cool
& you can stop reading there, or, for the maybe 2 mutuals who might have time to read this my thoughts on her as a character, her meta, and her character as raw potential...
long answer:
i considered making this entire thing a gush so you could read a gush about Billie. but, part of what draws me to her is that she’s not always well written, and in fandom she’s underrated for a literal protagonist.
since you ask...
billie is a cool character
when I played Dh2 (hadn't played Dh1), I was excited to see a black woman with disabilities who was captaining a massive ship by herself. wow.
then I discovered Billie’s backstory with Deirdre, the way she responded to that, then having to survive while living on the run, and her bisexuality. as well as her history with daud & delilah. fascinating!
she’s an outsider who has so much to lose, and knows what it's like to lose everything - having lost everything not once but three times - but nevertheless speaks truth to power. she's so brave! she went and helped Emily & Corvo and she must have known they might kill her! plus, she’s smart, she’s funny, she gets shit done, she’s gorgeous.
but... the meta
mild critique of fandom & arkane incoming.
skip this bit if you want - you've been warned twice now - jump to tired Hayao Miyazaki and read from there if you'd like my thoughts on writing her.
i thought Death of the Outsider was going to be amazing and then... well. *sad trombone* i've written about that before so i won't keep banging on. i figured others must be disappointed too, so I joined a few fandom spaces in hopes of finding camaraderie.
most people with complaints about DotO didn’t like how the Outsider and Daud were handled. which is valid & I agree. but it seemed like most paid no attention to Billie; when people talk about her it’s with respect to Daud, as opposed to in her own right. you could argue for fandom misogyny because people don’t talk about adult Emily Kaldwin that much either, but in Billie's case, it’s misogynoir (compare & contrast with the popularity of thomas, particularly the popularity of thomas portrayed as a white man for no particular reason that i've been able to discern - i keep asking around, is it in the books???).
i think this is a LOT better now than it used to be, which is fantastic. or perhaps i have found the correct echo-chamber? ha.
ultimately, The Fandom is a fraction of the entire picture, and not even the important bit since The Fandom is not who these games are made for. you can't make money relying on only your hardcore fans even if all of them spent a fortune on merch, this is true for any AAA game.
while it's true that Billie is underrated from a fandom perspective - but Billie as an underwritten protagonist is squarely Arkane’s fault.
it was reasonable when she was a side character - the lack of info in Dh2 makes perfect sense (if anything there was more lore in Dh2 which is kind of wild)-
- but as a protagonist in Death of the Outsider?
.... there’s lousy writing, and there’s whatever is going on with Billie Lurk, a black woman who mostly exists as a foil or saviour for light-skinned characters. In her own game there’s barely any of her own lore except where it's relevant to saving two dudes.
lore hints at, but barely touches on what race means in the Dh universe (xenophobia is stronger in Dh1; separate essay i guess), but Arkane has patted themselves on the back for portraying non-white characters, which feels like the same thing as the aesthetic of diversity we're seeing in advertising currently because it’s in marketing trend guides. it's self-congratulatory and it's a missed opportunity for deeper storytelling.
you can see an example of diversity at its most shallow in the way that Billie’s written: there’s little engagement with her as an entire person with history & wants & preferences, and the world she walks through in that game feels like it has nothing to do with her. you could make a case for alienation as a theme, but then, how do you handle the titular premise of 'Dishonored' without ever letting Billie make changes in an environment without a chaos system? it's disappointing from that angle too.
in my opinion, whatever it's worth, it was an accident Arkane created such an awesome character - they needed someone to betray daud. congrats billie.
all this said, it makes her an underdog as far as characters to enjoy & create art & stories for. it's nice to find so many like-minded, switched on people! <3
billie's character potential
she’s got a wealth of unexplored lore, being deeply intertwined with both Karnaca & Dunwall’s fates & criminal underbellies, as well as her connections to the witches & whalers, and three Empresses.
she’s lived a few distinct lifetimes and in the games we get to meet her at two peaks (KoD & DotO) & a low (Dh2 as Meagan).
her voice is very distinct, her dry & often dark humour is entertaining & fun to write. her perspective is really interesting - she’s had the widest variety of void-powers of anyone canonically, and she’s also lived through the highest highs and lowest lows.
she's got everything going for her :) i couldn't really pick a fav thing!
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Again by ARAKI is so so so Jaylex and Timlex core in the context of ur fic
Oooooooo yes.
It got long again so hiding it for neatness
"i haven't been the same lately, I don't blame you for not wanting to stay" so Jaylex, that one's obvious, Alex was changing so much all through uni, no wonder Jay hated him so much by the end, no wonder Jay started changing too, becoming crueler and doing things that hurt Alex as much as Alex was hurting him. Alex thought he deserved it, Amy told him he didn't and tried to show him what a healthy relationship should look like. Jay ALSO thought he deserved the pain he was in from Alex not liking him back, but just in a more nebulous way rather than for any real reason. It just felt like that was how it was meant to be, for both of them.
But but but... Jam. (I assume you meant jay and Tim, rather than Tim and Alex, as Tim and Alex haven't actually technically interacted in sorry it's locked yet? Either way imma yell about jam) JAM, obviously there's the whole thing with Tim and Jay falling out of trust with each other towards the end of the series. Jay sneaking into Tim's house with a knife, Tim overpowering him and tying him up with zipties, leaving him in his house to try and keep him safe.
There's always that.
But there's also kinda a thing for if Jay hadn't died at the end of the series too. Like, if he and Tim had both survived and gone on to live together and further their relationship. Jay would have changed, he's unfortunately very very fucked in the head, and as we see in the series, pretty resistant to actually getting any therapy or anything, and that'd easily be his downfall. (One of the things he does in chapter 5 is also something he did to Alex back in uni, and like, yeah, yikes, not good. Alex wasn't the only one making that relationship toxic. They both were. Jay pushed boundaries that shouldn't have been pushed, etc)
ANYWAY, the only thing kinda holding Tim and Jay together in the fic itself right now is the whole operator thing. If that was over, it'd be a lot harder for them to ignore all the things wrong with their relationship (unfortunately, all the things wrong with Jay that he refuses to fix). Now that he's in a relationship with Tim, Jay is the problem component. Before, he and Alex were the problem (and in Jay's head, it was just Alex) but now all Jay's damage from being with Alex back in uni will be on very clear display, and eventually it'd start getting in the way of his and tims ability to have a healthy relationship. For Jay it'd just feel like a normal relationship, like this is how it's meant to be, and hed just assume something with Tim changed, like tim got tired of pretending to be a nice person and started being horrible. But in reality Tim would have been struggling so much with how Jay was treating him, and he'd stop just putting up with it once it became clear that jay didn't think there was an issue, or think they needed to go to therapy about it, because "well this is just how relationships are, sorry you can't see that tim"
Their relationship would so easily fall apart, because the only one tying real knots in the strings that attach them to each other is Tim, and jay's just haphazardly tangling threads together hoping they'll hold, and refusing how to tie real knots, because "well in all my other relationships we just tangled the strings together and it worked"
I love jay. But he needs therapy. And he'd definitely keep refusing to get it, probably because he's scared it'll somehow make him lose Tim, rather than letting him keep Tim (his brain stupid, jay thinks dumb things that make no sense, but same so it's okay) anyway, sorry. Yeah, jay's now the fucked up one in the relationship and he doesn't know what to do with that, so he assumes it's actually TIM who's the bad guy or who has changed for the worst, when really Jays the one starting most of the fights and blowing up over tiny things. And if Jay doesn't wanna do therapy about it, Tim doesn't have to put up with that, especially when they have a kid in the house. He's not having her traumatised like he was by the people who are supposed to care for her.
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Who doesn’t love a cooking challenge? Except maybe Alex.
She’s learned that she and Bruno make a good team and he’s a beast in the kitchen, too. With his culinary skills and her competitive spirit, they’re sure to win a night in the hideaway. She’s more determined now than ever, especially after that unexpected kiss at the market.
They’ve always gotten along as friends and kept each other in the villa. Bruno took a huge risk bringing her back from Casa Amor after she’d been pied off by Will. Alex felt like she owed him at least that, but little did she know that she’d feel something more than just friendship towards Bruno.
After that steamy public kiss, Alex will never see pineapples or Bruno the same again.
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I have been painfully busy this week but this is a driveby post to update you on my status as a late stage Singto girlie. (Or Singto old womanie..)
I am watching SOTUS and Shadow concurrently. 6 episodes into each. Here are my most important feelings:
- Shadow is excellent and thought-provoking and filling the DFF hole in my life, but the most exciting FOR ME development was when Dan got stoned and fucked that shadow. Like good for him. His evil Catholic school trying to indoctrinate him into treating it like a figment of his imagination and repressing it into nothingness and instead, with the help of a little mary jane, he just went ahead and fucked that shadow. I was so proud of him.
- I don't want to say anything too controversial about SOTUS because I'm watching it for the History and I'm highkey aware that eight years of discourse about the series that launched Thai BL into a phenomenon is not something to wade into ill-prepared.
NONETHELESS I will recklessly share that, at least in these early episodes, Kong seems like he's unconsciously searching for a dom, and just really really excited to meet someone who gives him orders and publicly humiliates him and makes him feel small and striving. As a freak sub who used to read hazing stories in teen magazines as wank fodder I feel him, but I do hope Art actually has it in him to fill that need. It already feels a bit like Art is the one who is gonna get dommed in the end, and I mean good for him but ALSO I hope Kong can get his needs met and not just take care of everyone else all the time. Thank you for coming to my uninformed Ted Talk I should have kept to myself til I finished the series.
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