#first time and you try to play ur character the way youd be

[hanasnx]

heyyy do you have any advice on how to write smut cause its sooo difficult for me *cries in virgin*

ur like one of my fav smutty writers and idk if you have any tips 😭

first off thank u very much i appreciate that :)

this isnt the first time ive been asked for writing tips so im gonna give a lot of info. youre bound to find something useful in this mess

im so sorry but one of my solutions to giving myself confidence in smut-writing was to literally fuck and fuck a lot

after losing my virginity it still wasnt enough experience tbh. so i gave myself room to explore my sexuality and was privileged enough to do it with a partner that encouraged that growth. that experience of fucking sure didnt hinder my smut-writing ability if you know what i mean ;0 but everything else about writing i learned from years of practice. ive been writing since i was in elementary school like id come home from fourth grade and read and write on quotev klsdjfsfj smut writing skills came later post puberty

when i tried writing smut as a virgin i genuinely couldn’t get past the build up. i was fantastic at writing the build up, it was the actual sex part that was hard bcos even tho i had done enough research (i read a lot of porn) it didn’t instill me with enough confidence that i could write it correctly, and so i never did. however! i sure wish i’d committed to it more, so let me see if i can write out some tips that would’ve helped me in the past

(this is just how i write smut, im by no means an expert)

my timeline

the way i write smut is pretty formulaic so i’ll break it down:

hook line ⟹ settings ⟹ build-up ⟹ foreplay ⟹ sex ⟹ ending

☥ hook line. maybe: a dialogue piece to kickstart; an ambiguous line that reels you in; an exciting action. i dont like starting my story with the name/pronouns of a character doing something boring. i.e. “you were getting ready for the day…” idk it’s not the worst thing in the world and we've all done it but just writing out what i try to avoid.

☥ build up is key to me. i have such a hard time reading and writing porn with no plot. i’ll do it sometimes if i like the writer enough, but i rarely write smut without the build up bcos i feel like that’s where the juice is. its whats fun and what you get to play around with bcos the actual sex part of the fic is pretty predictable.

focus on what’s said and unsaid in dialogue between characters. focus on the emotion each of them are feeling and how that emotion manifests into body language.

⟹ dirty talk is not for everyone, but god i love it. literally get nasty with it, this is your writing and we’re all just readin it. build anticipation using dirty talk, make filthy promises, make threats. make your characters talk about the nasty shit they wanna do to each other.

imagine someone you really wanna fuck, imagine the things youd do to them if you had the chance,,, write it into your characters.

☥ foreplay. goes hand in hand with dirty talk, its where the touching starts. decide how you want to play it. who gets oral, who gets fingered. both? one of them? neither and they just go straight to fucking?? i like foreplay, but if youre writing a “quickie” scenario then it may not be in the cards.

lets say it is in the cards tho. so some things to remember:

⟹ foreplay gets the dicks hard. when dicks get hard they leak pre-cum. balls have like no cushion and theyre soft and have little sacks in em that move around. the skin of this genital is often described as velvety bcos its soft. ive honestly never had sex with an uncircumcised penis so i have no idea if there’s a difference between how they feel.

foreplay makes the pussies loose and wet. the inside can be lumpy. it can be ridged or smooth. it can be all kinds of flesh colors like brown and pink.

without the foreplay (which can be verbal communication, or touching of the body or genitals) its a little painful for afabs bcos theyre too tight or too dry. and a flaccid dick is a little unpredictable to try to fit in.

⟹ afabs can have multiple orgasms, amabs are less lucky. afabs can cum and squirt multiple times, amabs can cum multiple times.

⟹ genitals get really sensitive after cumming though. so if you write someone finishing, write out how they might need some time before they finish again or start fucking, or that they get overstimulated getting touched still after they came and that sensitivity is a little uncomfortable.

⟹ the head of the penis is the most sensitive and that’s what makes it cum/orgasm. clits on pussies are the most sensitive and its what makes cum/orgasms happen. its very difficult if not impossible to achieve orgasm (if youve got a pussy) through penetration alone without clit stimulation

⟹ you can cum/squirt and not have an orgasm

☥ sex

⟹ changing positions can change angles and hit new pleasurable spots inside pussies.

⟹ probably write a couple different positions during the sex part, just to keep things fresh.

⟹ sprinkle in dirty talk to prolong the sex scene and to avoid sounding repetitive because if youre writing p in v it’s pretty standard to thrust over and over again until youre done. its a lot less glamorous when you spell it out like that, so you gotta add shit to make the sex scene more enjoyable to the reader whos not actively experience the sex.

☥ ending. i usually end the one shot after the fucking is done.

the smut tips

☥ think back to a time you were really turned on. from a show, from a book, something someone said to you, your own sex life, porn you really liked,,, take inspiration from it. use it and channel that own arousal within you.

if youve got a dirty fantasy and it gets you so hot and bothered thinking about it, write that.

if youve got a partner that fucks you crazy good and supplies you with inspo for dialogue or for settings or for scenarios, write that too. theres been a whole bunch on my blog that was inspired by my boyfriend. not everything, but enough to mention it.

also! another thing that people underestimate is the inspiration you take from other blogs. like mine for example, if you like my stuff take inspo from it. study my writing style and you’ll see all kinds of little tips in subtext id never be able to list for you. i do that with other blogs, i dont copy them but i definitely learn little things i like from them and incorporate it into my writing for a more cohesive story. if i take an idea though i ask for their permission & credit them.

☥ the most important tip i can give you is be as self indulgent as possible. youre wasting time worrying about other people. “will they like this? will people think im weird? what if they think im weird for writing this?” fuck that noise. warn accordingly, and go ham. your self indulgence is your best friend. it’ll guide you through all those dirty things you want to say or do to someone, let it take root and write what excites you. chances are you will find your people, and your fic will be set apart bcos it’s so specific to you that people will be drawn to that. and if theyre not? it ends up not being popular? it doesnt matter! because you had fun writing it right? fuck yea u did

☥ the types of words you use are so important. words that invoke a certain emotion or sexy feeling. its difficult to explain but i try my hardest to use “beautiful language” paired with dirty, disgusting, cacophonous language. marry them together so you can convey whether youre “love-making” or “fucking”. i dont like words that dont look or sound good in my head. like when you paint, you probably use colors you like looking at to create the entire picture on the canvas that’s beautiful. so pick out paints that are pleasing to the eyes. the bold ones and the soft ones.

examples of words i dont use cos i hate the way they sound and the way they look: “vagina” and “penis” LMAO

even “butt” isnt a word i like to use. i’ll almost always use “ass” or “backside”

⟹ the smut writer’s dictionary

☥ i keep comedy out of it for the most part, ive never really seem humor added positively into a smut that added to the experience. its usually physical humor stuff like the characters bumping heads or stubbing their toe or something its just cringy to me idk. if i add comedy (i am not good at writing comedy)i put it before the smut. and if you must have some sort of lightheartedness id keep it casual, light, and personal. like an inside joke or something tongue in cheek. you dont have to hide your deepest desires behind humor , you can be serious

☥ your pain tolerance is heightened so run with that. get spanked its fun

more important tips i love and stand by:

☥ call backs are important to me. it’s like if you have something in the future of your fic to be used, try to incorporate it in some small way in your establishing settings or build up. but it’s not as important to others as it is to me. an example would be in my one shot “talk huttese to me”, at the end anakin fucks reader on the tool table. at the very beginning of the fic, when i had reader taking in the surroundings of the “garage bay”, she scanned the drawer stack where she set his broth she brought him, and the tool table he’d later fuck her on. its kinda like,,, foreshadowing (i think?). you’re setting up your reader to be like “?? i wonder why the author thought it would be important to mention the tool table.. wonder if anakin fucks her on it later.” but even if your readers dont react that way, i still think it ties things together nicely

☥ try to write 15-20 mins uninterrupted. create a ritual. i use the bathroom, refill my water, grab a fun drink like sweet tea, put on a silent youtube video (like my ahsoka star wars lofi live i love so much), listen to a playlist of music (preferably music you havent heard before so it can fade into the background. maybe even cultivate a playlist for the vibe youre going for in your story, aids greatly in creating an atmosphere in your writing if youre translating the music in your ears), and turn your phones notifications off (ofc i leave on notifs for calls in case of emergencies, but i can answer my friends’ texts after my writing session). set a timer so you dont have to keep checking the time.

☥ don’t stop in the middle of your storytelling to check the thesaurus or dictionary. write out whatever word/phrase first came to mind and highlight it to come back to later to alter or replace it completely. you’re interrupted your creative flow and its difficult to come back to it when youre checking the thesaurus every five seconds. this hack was crucial to my ability to stay on task i promise you

☥ avoid sounding repetitive by using the same words close together. you’ll create a fuller story by adding to your vocabulary using the thesaurus.

☥ avoid listing actions, break them up with adverbs at the start of your sentences if you must, or description of things or the place your character is in, or explain the emotion your character is feeling or what that emotion is causing within your character. starting sentences over and over again with the character’s name or pronoun breaks up the flow for the reader.

☥ really try to finish your works in progress even if you think its bad, the challenge of it will help you practice and learn to overcome your own mind trying to hold you back

☥ if you dont like the direction your fic is going,,, and youre experiencing writer’s block:: cross out the most recent bit and take it in a new direction. “oh but indy!! i really have a certain goal in mind!!” great, find another way to get to it because youre blocking yourself from finishing this forcing yourself into a non entertaining corner. switch it up! challenge yourself. “but indy!! i really liked what i had for this scene!!” yea but youre blocked right? youre not writing anything else for this scene and you cant, right? if you like what you have for this scene (an action, a dialogue piece youre proud of, a plot twist) save it! use it for a different piece !

hope this helps you and others!

#indy shoots the shit #anon #indy overshares #thanks for the msg!! #writing tips #smut writing tips

[ars0nism]

just finished trespasser dhmu im not okay

#is this a joke. is it #im glad dorian's okay but cmon a long distance relationship?? da4 is just my inquisitor moving to tevinter and everyone else telling him no #'inquisitor what the fuck are you doing' packing my shit fuck you you think im leaging him alone?? #i think i got decent endings for evrryone #except bull but we dont #we dont talk about that #we do im upset #like part of the reason i romanced dorian in the first place was bc i keot fucking up with bull. yk when ur playing a game like this for the #first time and you try to play ur character the way youd be #yeah bull disagreed. most of the time #so i didnt get his quest. #and trespasser spoilers #he betrayed me. and i had to kill him. and it hurt #ugh im just gonna reblog this post with my rant from discord #im sad LMAO #i mean im glad i didnt die at the end. like when the inquisitor went thru that last eluvian and it broke i was like 'im not gonna die alone #am i????' #bringing ur bf along for the sole purpose of potentially dying in his arms lmao #'min case i die ily dorian''of course youd break my heart' NO I FUCKING SOBBED #im so. so grateful the inquisitor didnt die in the end at least #i wouldnt have survived a funeral scene

[blxetsi]

armin with a heavier gf in headcanon or whatever you want 🥺🙏

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH

armin arlert with a chubby s/o headcanons

armin arlert x gn!reader

warnings: uhhh fluff, armin is described as a "chubby chaser", explicit descriptions of bodies,

- soooooo lets talk about it

- first of all let me make it clear everyone in the aot universe (modern or canon) like fat ppl. and poc. and disabled ppl. idc i dont make the rules i just say them. and what i say is truth sooooooo

- but rn we're talking abt armin bc hes bae 😌✨

- so armin is just kinda like,, in love w fat people ?? idk hes like a chubby chaser it doesnt matter. pear shape ? apple shape ? idk what other shape names there are but he likes them all

- ur thick ass thighs that jiggle with the tiniest movement ?? the fatty upper arms that have loose skin ?? the warm tummy with soft skin and peach fuzz thats squishy ?? Yeah ❤️

- his favourite thing about you is ur chubby hands that he likes to hold. theyre just so soft and thick and his favourite thing is when you touch his face or squish his cheeks or grab onto his shoulders or arms or anything

- if ur really insecure abt your double chin DONT BE !! he thinks its really cute, especially when you turn ur head down or to the side when blushing, it really accentuates it and he thinks youre cute

- his favourite thing is cuddling just bc youre so warm and soft and pretty and he likes to hold the parts of your body that youre insecure about. AND if youre not comfortable with him touching those body parts he makes sure to steer clear of them, armin never wants to make you uncomfortable ever

- ive seen ppl when writing a character w a fat s/o say things like "and x person LOVES that u eat he cant stand the ppl that only eat a salad" bitch armin doesnt give a fuck about what you eat as long as its something you like and youre full afterwards tf, he hates when u starve urself no matter what you look like gtfo of here

- idk if this would ever happen but if someone was like, talking smack abt you and he'd happen to hear it he'd try and join in on the conversation in an obvious way just to talk about how hot u are and to make them uncomfortable

- "look at them, those shorts make theyre thighs bulge out" "i know right ? they look so hot i want my head in between those thighs 😍🙏"

- if you two are going out for a night on the town or on a simple date and you decide to go out of your comfort zone with your outfit, hes telling u how beautiful u look and how cool you look omg-

- would definitely be the guy to say "its okay babe i can fight"

- armin cant fight. but he'll try if anyone hurts u !

- armins a biter. he'll just,, nom on ur stomach. its rlly weird.

- armin after giving ur stomach and thighs hickeys: im sorry 😹🤚 im just in a silly 😋 goofy 🥴 mood 😈‼️

- will support you in anything you decide you want to do

- "i want more rings for my fingers" he's immediately finding rings he think youd like (obviously hes already memorized your ring size duh ! wont stop until he finds rings that youd like and that fit no matter the cost)

- if you decide you want to lose weight he'll support you ! would even offer to help you make a meal plan or or would work out with you if you decide to

- sometimes you think hes in worse shape than you are bc hes huffing and puffing after lifting a weight five times

- he hasnt gone to the gym since college and thats only bc eren would drag him there okay 🙄🤚

- he likes having your head on his chest. idk why this is important but it is. and he likes to pet your head and play with your hair and when he thinks youve fallen asleep he'll whisper "you are my sunshine"

- likes resting his legs on your lap and vice versa

- likea your hugs and giving you kisses

- and he really likes when you shove your head into his neck when u get shy bc hes complimented you

- if you ever thought you werent good enough for him (which isnt true bitch you and armin were made for each other 🤩‼️) he'll remind you he loves you everyday for as long as it takes, would do it infinitely if he had to just so you knew that he loved and accepted all of you

- all in all he loves you idc idc, would be with you until the end of time, and would like to grow old with you and die in your arms. the end !

IM SORRY IF THIS WAS SHORT BUT ITS A SCHOOL NIGHT AND MY HAND IS NUMB ILY ALL TY FOR THE REQUEST ANON

BTW ASKS ARE OPEN SO REQUEST IF U WANT BITCHES

#attack on titan #attack on titan fanfiction #attack on titan x reader #armin arlert #armin arlert x reader #armin attack on titan #armin x reader #armin arlert headcanons #armin arlet x reader #armin headcanons #armin arlet #hange zoe #erwin smith #eren jaeger

[tscmu]

Some headcanons for the Hq boys and how they propose to their s/o?

HI YES THIS IS THE KIND OF STUFF I LOVE WRITING ABOUT PLS okay so u didnt really specify which boys so im gonna go for ones that i can picture proposing that sounded weird ok-

characters; koushi sugawara, satori tendou, kenma kozume, osamu miya + tooru oikawa oK LETS GO

koushi sugawara

- pls he’d make it so heartfelt and meaningful HHH I LOVE HIM~ - he’d want to make you feel how much he loved you, like actually feel it in your heart - i feel like he’d tell a FEW people, probably only get daichi to help AHAHAH - bruh asahi would probably have a mental breakdown and tanaka would snitch💔💔 - but he’d have an idea of what you both wanted i think, you wouldve spoken it over before defos - he’d want it to not be that public, just the two of you - so it’d be at like a hiking trail you both go on or something, a place that means loads to both of you but isn’t there for the world to see - and then...…came the day - he knew how much you picked up on little details so he had to be sneak sneak ten thousand™ - “hey, wanna go out on that one walk up *insert name of place idk*? ok ok ok i’ll get ur coat sugar” - EEEEEEEEEEE - he was trying his absolute best to keep it together - he knew you’d most likely say yes, so he wasn’t TOO scared, but it was still SCARY LIKE- - and then u got to the place he wanted to propose - it was this place where you always stopped, where there was a little bench (with your initials STILL carved into it from all those years ago) and it looked out over a nice view - “ooh, can we stop here again!” “u-huh i was actually gonna ask-” - bro he almost forgot the speech daichi read over to him about 20 times - but HE DID IT WOOOO - he didn’t want to make a MASSIVE deal out of it, the wedding would be more important to him but he still wanted to make you know how much he adored you - speech included lots of memories dating even back to before hed even SPOKEN to you i stg this man - AND U SAID YES!!! u have no choice. u did.

satori tendou

- i feel like he’d be kINDA similar to suga?? - a little less caring - he’d never actually pictured himself getting married tbf- - he never thought he’d actually find the right person so he just....gave up idk - BUT THEN YOU CAME INTO HIS LIFE- - even with you he hadn’t really thought about marriage, he was just focused on having fun with you, but then ushijima was like ‘...so, tendou. when is the wedding commencing between you and y/n.” and he just- - it was actually when they were sitting there he started to plan it - ushijima would SEEM like the worst person to go to, but he was actually quite good at this stuff - so in about 2 hours sat at the back door of tendou’s work, they had sketched out a sort of plan on the back of a spare napkin - there was one main thing he knew he wanted to talk about - how you always stuck by him, no matter what he did - he thought he’d seriously fucked up, and you would be back at his door the next day, smiling and chattering about this new café you heard opened down the road - god, he was terrified to even mention paris to you, but you were so up for the idea, it took him by shock - he didn’t take you for granted - so for once, he wanted to make you feel loved - they couldn’t think of a place to take you for ages, but then it hit them - you and tendou always went to wakatoshi’s games, ever since high school you both always made the commute if you had the time - and ushijima had a game coming up in two weeks...…. - when he mentioned it OFC U WERE DOWN PLS, you loved going back to japan - like ofc france was incredible but......... it was just lovely to see everyone again ;-; - since youd been there so much, you basically just got to stand right at the side of the court AHAHAH - so they won the game. obviously. its ushi and kags we’re talking abt here. are you kidding. then tendou started acting weird, which made u hella sus - it was the first time in what felt like years you’d seen him so...nervy - he kept fumbling over his words, you had to yell at him to speak up - but eventually he did it - he spoke abt how much you meant to him, how you made him more comfortable in his own body, how you stuck by him through everything - AND U SAID YES. AGAIN, U HAVE NO CHOICE. - and yes ushi and kags started cheering and the news outlets put u on the news i dont make the rules ok

kenma kozume

- ok mans is TERRIFIED - he’d quite genuinely never thought about marriage, throughout his years with you by his side it just...never crossed his mind - but it was when you were lying in bed one night, his arm dangled over you as you both drifted in and out of sleep - and it just hit him - why the fuck were you both still like this? - marriage was something you always expressed a love for, when kuroo got married you were basically in a trance the whole time - how was he so unaware? - people described kuroo’s proposal as pretty much perfect, he’d always been good at reading his partner, so he just used that knowledge to make something he knew they’d like - so, to kenma’s extreme distaste, he went to kuroo - oh my god kuroo fucking c r i e d - kenma was finally ‘growing up’ - so after about an hour of kuroo sobbing, they finally got down to business - after lots of.. lets say elaborate ideas from kuroo, and lots of no's from kenma, they finally came to a sort of compromise - since you and kuroo worked in the same department, he would text you on saturday simply asking if you wanted to catch coffee and talk about that one assignment - obviously, you said yes - not thinking anything of it, you just pulled on a jumper and jeans AHAH- - then you notice,,,why tf is he taking u to a beach at 7pm in march???? - #serialkillerkurooheadcanons - but u see kenma and ur like... wtf have u gotten yourself into- - have they been possessed?? who knowz - and then u get BLINDFOLDED LIKE WHAT - but then u snap back down to earth like why would they kidnap u- - as kuroo takes it off, kenma’s quite literally shaking - poor babie - he never really knew how to explain his thoughts properly, so the speech wasn’t anything extremely dramatic and/or romantic - but he did in a way tell you how much you meant to him - he spoke abt how you boost his confidence, have always been there whenever he needed you, and how you seem to always understand him when he’s being at his most blunt - therefore he thinks you’re his soulmate - PLSPLSPL IM CRYING

osamu miya

- i think he always knew he wanted to marry you - atsumu always embarassed him about it- - it got to the point you didn’t actually think he’d propose, you would just wake up one day and a wedding dress would be on the door - but it got to the point where tsumu was mentioning it significantly more when you went over for dinner - mama miya was always telling you how happy she was that samu picked you - even your own parents were being oddly warmer towards samu, whenever they phoned they asked how he was, etc etc - so you knew something was up - samu was always really polite to your parents, asked their permission before he even took you out on a date - ironic because you lived together but still- - so turned out, he actually mentioned proposing to you to them - they adored him for gods sake so of course they said yes - then tsumu thought he was acting weird, so he told his side - jesus christ they freaked out - his parents were always nervous about atsumu, who slept with random people on the weekends, and hadn’t been in a proper relationship since middle school - you were basically their god send AHAHA - so it was a massive deal when he wanted to marry you - it would appear that he didn’t really care, but in honesty it meant the wholeass world to him - like suga, he’d go for a location that meant a lot to both of you - christmas was a huge deal for both your families, they both came together and you had an incredible time - and last year some of the jackals came over, which was just hilarious - so what better time than christmas with your loved ones around you??? - it started off like a normal christmas, you had an incredible dinner ( cooked by none other than osamu ((with atsumu and bokuto attempting to sabotage it but just burning their hands on the pot)) ) then all played some games - but it was when you were all watching the basic christmas tv programmes when the atmosphere... changed - everyone was looking at you and samu, even sakusa looked excited - it was when his father muted the tv, and samu took your hand, your heart was basically beating out your chest. - he spoke about how he felt like, for the entirety you’d been together for, every day he seemed to fall more in love with you. you were like his rock, when things were even a bit off he could just come to you and you’d automatically make him happier even just by looking at you - bruh bokuto and hinata were sobbing in the corner

tooru oikawa

- surprising, but he never thought about marriage - he just kind of assumed he’d be one of those people that would be in a relationship for like a week then just.. move on to another person idk - that was until he ran into you - everyone, even his own parents, said he was a different person when he started dating you - it was ironic, you were quite similar to him - yet you made him rethink his fucking morals  - it was sappy asf - ANYWAY BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND - he took this proposal really seriously, he wanted it to be the best moment of your whole life - until the wedding ofc ofc - since you’d basically changed him as a person, he wanted this to just show his appreciation for everything you’d ever done for him - he wanted you to feel his love - and so he set about preparing a good proposal - he’d be like osamu, and definitely ask your parents first - your parents loved him anyway, they thought he was the best thing that’d happened to you for a long while - he basically knew what he wanted to do - nothing too public, but nothing too quiet - whats the point of proposing if some people dont see am i right??? - sometimes when you both either a) needed a break or b) you both had a period of time where you were free, you both just booked an impromptu holiday AHAHHA - #richkidtingz - so obvs he had to do it on one of them... it was ur thing after all?? - it was when you walked in the door, face red, and flopped down on the sofa next to him, he grasped the opportunity - “..got any spare holidays from work?” - you quickly went on a travel agent website and booked a three day holiday to brazil, leaving the next morning - it was one of your favourite places to just escape to, so it made sense for him to propose there tbf - it was as you both woke up the first morning there, still sleepy from the night before, you grinned at eachother. - “hey.. get ready quick, i wanna do something.” “wHAT-” - he didn’t actually know where to do it, he just called a taxi and asked for your favourite high street HAHAH - after about an hour of browsing around shops, your hand never out of his, you finally asked ‘what did you want to do?’ - his breathing almost stopped i stg, he didn’t realise how scared he was - but then... HE DID IT POGGERS - he stuck to what he knew he wanted to speak about, making you sob in the process ofc - and even all the locals congratulated you!!!

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HI THIS IS SO LONG IM SORRY BUT I LOVED WRITING IT PLS!! THANK U FOR REQUESTING da box is always open mwah

#im sorry this is so long #but it was fun to write so fuck off #yes i listened to adore you while writing this #yes it made me cry #we dont talk about it #haikyuu #haikyu #haikyu!! #haikyū!! #haikyuu!! #sugawara #hq sugawara #hq #hq imagines #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu hc #hq hc #hq headcanons #tendo #tendou #kenma #oikawa #tooru oikawa #osamu #osamu miya #miya osamu #kozume kenma #kenma kozume

[killapunk]

the weirdest, NO, evilest, person i have every worked for

no real names are used in this piece. i refer to other weirdos and freaks throughout, sorry its a long read (i didnt intend for this) but its one of those things ya gotta settle into and believe me its a wild ride. this saga covers over three years of drama btw.

tw: mental health mentioned (inc panic attacks), chronic illness mentioned and mild sex references 

i am going to single out jess. shes more evil than a weirdo but weirdo nonetheless. pete is a secondary weirdo in this saga.

i work in retail for a long time. a fashion store to be precise. i started out in one store but transferred when i started studying at uni and remained there for the majority of the retail career. during my time there i had three managers, the longest one, who is also a fucking weirdo was pete. now before i worked with pete, before he transferred to our store. i didnt like pete when i started working with him, he annoyed the fuck outta me. but my life circumstances changed and my mental health issues got very bad AND i was diagnosed with cfs so i had to disclose it w him. turns out… he was fucking mental too, very understanding, super chill. we liked the same shit. great boss. 11/10 every time.

he would be my reference for every job ever…

…but. he started gettin involved w jess. now to jess. the main character in this piece.

jess had started at the company around the same time as me and we were always on the same level until the last year or so. jess was a bit older than the average age of staff at the store (17-20) and was 23 when this drama started. she had a college diploma, went onto do something semi-successful but related to her HND. but blew all her money, moved back into her parents and started working at the store part time and then onto full time. she was like…the perfect retail girl? small, cute, slim, bubbly… always looked cool in her uniform. customers loved the fuck out of her. 

jess had a bf when i first started and pete had a longstanding gf. jess and her bf ended things abt 4 or 5 months before pete and his gf. but i remember they started gettin cushy around about this time. im not sure if its cos im v sympathetic towards pete (a true kind soul who i hold v dearly in my heart) but even tho youd be thinking ‘boss abuses his power’ …jess was and still is fuckin manipulative and he has longstanding mental health issues and i just think she sorta got the ball rollin’. pete and his gf didn’t seem on good terms, i dunno the full story but it seemed like they should have broken a long time before the did.

i think the fortnight before pete and his gf broke up they were spotted hanging out together near where she lived. it was this hush hush thing that everyone giggled abt cos there was at the time talk they were fuckin. when it got out, after his breakup jess said she was ‘just being a friend’ cos he was ‘going through a tough time’. 

jess got promoted to keyholder even though she didnt really (at the time) have the skills or confidence to be a keyholder. and then she started to try and fuckin control the work. back during this time, everyone who worked at the store, minus literally 3 people, had worked for the company for at least a year. the store ran very well, we were always in profit. nothing went wrong. but. she started changing processes because it 'made things easier when she was opening’. like. she made everyone tally the amount of people they served in the fitting room in one box and tally the amount of things people left behind so she could make a sales chart. idk if that’s normal in other stores but like? it was just nuts and impossible to do.we always put deliveries away out the package but not folded in a particular way. she made everyone tag and (where relevant) hang items bc she had to pick everything in the morning. 

she became friends w most of the girls, including one of the supervisors. they ruled the workplace. it was a total gossip mill. she gaslit the fuck outta people. one already less-popular girl at work ended up quitting cos she kept blaming her for fuck ups, she kept getting write ups and it was impating her mental health. she spun people against her. less popular girl spoke up and called her a bully and jess acted all defensive and said she wasn’t a bully bc shed been bullied before? jess continued to fuck up the workplace. next she turned on two people in her own clique. one tbh, i think she was jealous of bc jess had always wanted to be a teacher and this gal was training to be one. the other girl was v like jess, just not a bitch… strongwilled, liked control. anyway, drama got to the point where they had to quit. waay too much drama for this textpost. at this point others started to notice n work became hostile. jess moved her girlgang clique to one of the original clique girls, a different supervisor and the other two full time staff members.

pete obv didn’t listen to people coming to him, as store manager being like… hey… there’s this major clique problem and he’d be like ‘nah everyone is just friends, jess is a bit insecure but yno things are good, people quit, its just retail. fuck it.’ jess accused everyone who didn’t get on w her as being a terrible person. those legit words. like. if someone said it was a shame x, y or z left shed rebut, nah they were shit at their job, they were a shit person. honestly. EVERYONE. was a bad person. even the nicest people in the world were the worst person, the worst at the job. she was a good person, she liked the good people. she HAD BEEN BULLIED AND WOULD NEVER BULLY. she threw the anxiety word around a lot.

once we had a staff night out and i got left alone with jess and pete at the end of the night in this terrible lil bar as i waited for someone to pick me up. this is a good point to mention jess was always weirdly jealous cos i was close to pete. fucking ridic considering he was 14 years older than me and you know my fucking boss??? this night, i was sitting right next to pete, we were both drinking, jess wasn’t (cos she likes to be in control, she even said it), he had his arm around me and was whispering something into my ear that was such a non-thing i don’t even remember. she got her phone out, started texting. he excused himself and when he returned he sat beside her. it was fucking nuts. i couldn’t believe my eyes. we had to basically carry pete out of the bar. jess said to me she was gonna drive him home cos it was on the way to hers (spoiler! it was not!). myself and pete did the open the next day. he came in wearing the same clothes. i mean, he could have just passed out and had to rush to work when he woke up. but. this guy went out a lot. he never repeated an outfit. i think jess took advantage of a very drunk him. similarly, on another night out, jess promised to drive someone home. said person got too drunk and thew up. jess refused to take them home and called them embarrassing, she gave the space in her car to pete.

i had a major bad evening shift at work concerning another staff member, kaylee. a gal who just rubbed me up the wrong way, and who didn’t like me. ill never know why but it was just one of those things where anytime i was on shift w her she would nitpick and bitch about me and just… make me feel not v good. she was possibly the laziest and rudest person i had ever worked with but someone got away with it?

i used her as a way to talk to pete about the general problems in the store (jess). and…it was fuckin surreal. i told him abt kaylee. i told him i thought jess was controlling but kinda laid off a bit like ‘i get she thinks shes doing it for good’ etc. i padded it out w a few other rly petty issues abt the store. i was actually really upset, kinda numb from life to properly let out my emotions. and then. he started cry on me. like this full-on grown man having a panic attack in front of me when i was 19, fucked on diazepam i should have never been prescribed. to this day i visualise it. me and pete were v close at this point, and like, he didn’t mention jess too much – asked me about the other girl and other issues when i came to him. we spoke about personal shit, all but jess. i kinda wonder if he didn’t have the panic attack if i would have told him his under the radar relationship w her was not on?

and then. pete sold me out in the name of jess. idk the full ins and outta everything but he had to confront the drama once and for all cos our figures were so low so he decided to blame it all on kaylee. from my understanding of the situ from a lot of ‘he said she said’ bs, pete had this big meeting w kaylee. was like. 1. do ur job right and 2. stop being rude and unapproachable. the thing is, although kaylee is rude shes one of these ppl who most ppl really liked, not in a jess/regina george theyre scared of you way but…like they thought she was a tv character and she was funny and honest. so i think she confronted some obvious allies, and jess told her, according to another staff member, that i complained about her. after hearing this i obvious went to pete and tbh, acted pretty dramatic (cos if you haven’t fucking learned already THIS STORE WAS FULL OF DRAMA QUEENS). as soon as i heard, i started texting him angrily on his day off. i remember folding something in the fitting rooms and he came up to give me a hug and i was like ‘HOW FUCKING DARE YOU TELL OTHER PEOPLE MY BUSINESS’. i confronted jess, in a lighter tone, cos i obv told pete (half) what i felt about her. jess played the fucking innocent role. like, she said something along the lines of ‘we’re both close to pete n he was so worried that when me, you and kaylee did those shifts together that something would go wrong. so he told me to keep an eye on things and that’s all i told kaylee cos she wasn’t sure why she was being targeted when so many people in this store are treating people badly. i didn’t say you reported her or anything, honestly!!!!’ queue more bs.

after this, jess didn’t bother with me but was never explicit about hating me. if there was a convo going on and i tried to join in she scolded at me for being nosey. if i was unwell (i have cfs) shed moan ‘jokingly’ that i always had to be ill. i think she ripped on me once cos i said i was late for a hand-in at uni.

her next real victim, however, was jack, my best friend in store and our supervisor. jack was getting fucked over in his supervisor role bc pete would schedule jess for anything managerial. jess started a rumour that pete didn’t trust jack bc jack fucked it at a meeting w the other stores (semi true but fucking up a meeting isn’t the end of the world). like. anything jack would be, jess would be on him. by this point 50% of the staff that were around at the start of the story HAD LEFT. jess had driven people out and had the new ones all up her arse.

pete quit. it was sudden.

not long later, facebook popped up with a fuckin ‘pete is in a relationship with jess’ status and pete has never spoken to me again. i left shortly after that, although our new manager was lovely i felt like i was working for jess.

jack ended up GETTING DEMOTED, by petes replacement who had no idea what a shitstorm she was getting herself into. the new manager PROMOTED jess and demoted jack bc she was doing all the supervisor jobs whilst jack was only doing midshifts. he didnt get shafted to the lowest pay and was instead given the title ‘trainer and authorised opener/closer’ whilst still doing the same fucking job. he transferred out, cos that shit is fucking degrading and within, like two months he was put back up his rightful position. yay for my forever work bestie. I

feel like this has been going on for too long now. i think this doesn’t do her justice. like…i cant believe someone who is NOW 26 and who got what she wanted after manipulating a mentally ill man caused so much drama and pain and tension in a fucking clothes store.

fucking horrid. im reading this completely exhausted and so i cant say much but i just feel like these people are always the ones who come out on top, and its so fucked up. im really sorry you had to deal with so many unpleasant people, and your friend as well. 

i swear mediocrity and asskissing is what gets you anywhere in this world, and manipulative cunts like this jess woman take full advantage of that. it’s pretty scary, honestly. amazing how far drama can go, huh. this is why i have trust issues.

i still hope she gets her ass kicked by life, though. there has to be some sort of karmic justice somewhere

i also feel like i should say that there’s always going to be people who won’t like you for some reason. even if you don’t do anything wrong and even though everyone else thinks they’re great. no idea why this happens, but all i can say is there’s really nothing you can do. so FUCK EM (in the most metaphorical sense as they don’t deserve you giving them the time of day)

#manipulation #story sharing #submission

[scenevixx]

Vixx As Boyfriends!!!

[HAKYEON] - romantic pickup lines that makes you melt - teasing you 24/7 - even if you’re in a crowd with many people, he only sees you, and only you - overprotective, he makes sure that you eat well, don’t diet in a wrong way, and sleep well - and if you can’t sleep he will come to your room and whisper some sweet and romantic things to you saying I love you so much what did I do to deserve you// sleep well sleep tight dream of me you cute little one till you fall asleep - also would protect you from builes but using words instead of actions - surprise kisses, mostly on the forehead and lips - if hakyeon catches you talking to any boys even if there’s no intention of cheating on him tHAT BOY IS SO GOING TO GET IT - ^makes sure that he’s around if u’re surrounded by guys - when u’re cold, he will give you a warm embrace and kisses your cheek and say “you silly girl, bring more clothes to a cold country like this! Look, your cheeks are all red because of the cold!!” And what he did makes you so warm - he will bring you to school everyday, and when the girls asked you who’s that hot guy that fetches you to school and before you can talk he kisses your cheek and told them ure his girlfriend making the girls go cRAZY - he makes breakfast for you almost every morning, no matter how nasty it tasted sometimes, you will say it’s nice -you came back home after a few days (camp maybe?) and you went to his room and saw him murmuring some words as he sleeps - as you went closer and he was saying “ahh..I miss y/n so much..y/n when are you coming back? Is she hanging out with other guys?? Is she..” - and he started snoring, you stroked his soft hair as you whispered “I’m here..I’m back…sleep well hak, don’t worry about me” As you kissed his forehead a.k.a the place he loves to kiss you at - he woke up @ the sense of your touch and the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was you, his beloved girlfriend -he carassed your cheeks and planted kisses all over it, and then hugging you and telling how much he loves you and how much he misses you when u’re not with him and that he has so much thoughts on his head thinking if u’re going to hang out with other guys that’s not him. - and you told him you miss him so much too, and both of you proceeded with a kiss with both of his hands cupping your face and your hands wrapped around his neck

[Taekwoon] - a very, very quiet boyfriend - mostly shows his affection through actions - rarely talks, but cuddles with you under a soft blanket as your face buries into his warm chest and sings for you in his husky voice till you fall asleep - he will usually tell you his problems comfortably, without worrying you will spread it because he trusts you the most - when he comes back with ridiculously high grades, you will praise him so much till he covers his face and start hiding in the corner because he got shy - before dating you, he writes sad songs about heartbreak and unsuccessful relationships, but after he dated you, he wrote so many happy songs dedicated to you about how love makes him happy - once you can’t find him anywhere and you thought he ran, you thought he left you and you got so scared, you walked to your cupboard containing your clothes(to change and find him) and when you opened it you see Taekwoon munching the snacks you brought in a corner and you were like “JUNG TAEKWOON!! WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO STOP STEALING MY SNACKS TT.TT” but you saw him eating your snacks in such a cute way, ressembling a hungry baby hamster you just…let him be - when you reached college, you have to stay in the dorm in school for awhile. During that time, he sent you alot of letters and you decided to read them when everybody was sleeping.

“ dear y/n, You may find other guys that is better than me in there,you may find a guy that talks more than me and that you probably prefer that kind of affection than expressing love through actions,you may find a guy that stops stealing your snacks 24/7 and hiding in a corner of your room to eat,but I just wanna say I will always love you even if you find another guy.. because nobody can ever replace my heart other than you” Tears started rolling down your cheeks the moment you reached the end of the letter

“ silly boy, why would I leave you? Emotional boy… He must have written too many sad songs when I’m not around with him”

[jaehwan] • had asked you out through singing a song • pet names • a lot of pet names • “baby” “honey” “babe” • he initiates all the pda • he always lends you his clothes especially his hoodie • because he thinks you look really cute in oversized sweaters • personal serenades • every night when you cant sleep he sings for you • every time you feel down he sings for you • basically he sings very very very often to you • not that you mind, aft all it sounds like an angel calling you • dates with him would be so intimate • he’d make something simple like preparing breakfast into a game or something • making pancakes??? lmfao no more like FLOUR FIGHT • oh look now you both look like ghosts cause of all that flour • and then he makes you clean up the mess • but hes a softie so in the end he still cleans it up with you • will bug you to get a pet to keep together itll probably be a fluffy animal like a dog or a rabbit • but he’ll insist on naming it peter or something • xbox at midnight together with a bowl of popcorn • that he might have acidentally tipped over cause he was so agitated playing some racing game • also will not stop playing until he beats you • you eventually let him win because you were tired and he wasnt gonna let you stop until you did so • a m e s s • unless youre physically together, you’ll never not get a text from him in 24 hours • long messages with cute typos, a lot of emoticons and A LOT of ♡s • can literally SENSE when youre having a bad day and goes out of his way to cheer you up • animal impression contests between the two of you!!! • and you also always have high note battles with him even when you know youre gonna lose • your dates are never too extravagant and over the top • he focuses more on making you feel comfortable around him than bringing you to expensive places • lots of selcas • lots of aegyo • overall really sweet and youll never have a dull moment with him

[Ravi] • ngl sometimes you’d feel neglected because hes so focussed on his work • but he senses that and immediately makes it up • by immediately i mean after he finishes this song he just started working on • and by makes it up i mean smooches a lot of smooches physical contact • he’ll never pay you lip service, just lips • no one is allowed in his workplace unless its you so i guess thats kind of fair • altho you do choose not to disturb him since you know how hed rather be alone when working • but on the few instances you do you get spoilers for any upcoming tracks he was working on • and youd chuckle a bit everytime he plays you a guide version of his song that he recorded • because his husky voice singing the guide for girl group song cant not be funny • oh and the dog • butt • you two treat it like your child • he finds it hard to express “i love you” in words to you • and for some reason can only do that through songs • yes he composes songs with you as his muse • prob gets jaehwan to sing the guide instead so you wont laugh • he learnt that the hard way because,,it was supposed to be a serious song when he played a song to you but you ended up laughing when he couldnt reach a higher note • you werent mocking him you just found it really cute • really cute that he tries so hard to make up for all the lack of attention he gave you when he worked • there were days youd enter his workplace and see him just kinda passed out on his desk • no he didnt faint he fell asleep • oh the poor thing working so hard • and so you just kinda look at him and smile • he looked so vulnerable and innocent you couldnt believe it was the same guy in the day • but all dem royalties he earns tho • he easily splurges all those extra cash on you • fancy dinners and buying you stunning gifts • he never really had to say it but you could feel his sincerity in his love • not the most romantic guy but hey hes trying and you appreciate that

[hongbin] - handsome flower boy, all the girls were so envious of you dating such a boy like him - very awkward, he took a long time to tell you he likes you because he’s shy to express his feelings for you - whenever u’re sad, he will always be there telling his dark pasts and doing sets of cringey aegyos to make you laugh - constant teasing that made you so annoyed at the same time entertained - when fruits are served he will be so happy and that when you tried to take one fruit from his plate he will be like “NO THEY ARE MINE!!!” In such a childish manner - but after that he will feed you with those fruits because he loves you so much - he will bring a actual camera when he’s going out with you. He will usually take photos of you without you knowing and you ask him “why are you taking unglam photos of me? I surely look ugly in these photos..” And he kissed your forehead and then telling you that don’t have to worry at the fact you look ugly in these photos because you’re always beautiful - he always wants you to challenge him in overwatch, and that when you say that you will definitely win him, he said “babe, u’re talking to a person that is ranked 7th in the whole world for the character Hanzo” And that when u’re almost gonna win him, he will take away your control and youre like “HEY!! THIS IS CALLED CHEATING!!” and you tried taking the control back from him - but he accidentally fell on you and he was like on top on you and u’re at the bottom(let’s say you both played the game in the living room hence y'all sat on the sofa and played the game). Your heart was beating so fast and you closed your eyes tightly think that he will do something to you. he went closer to you, and he will push your hair behind your ears with his delicate fingers as he whispered

“I love you”

[Hyuk] • omf how does he just turn from that manliness to a baby in like 0.7262 seconds • literally one second he has his hair up and gelled and hes being a gentleman and all • and the next moment his smile just appears and melts all of that manliness away and you just want to protect him??? • but you know in reality hes the one whod protect you because LOOK AT THOSE ARMS • childish fights over the tv remote • and he’d make that high pitch scream when you try to snatch it away and things dont go his way • and the scream scared you so youd let go of the remote • and thus you admit defeat and be forced to watch naruto • it kinda gets rubbed onto you and before you know it youve become an avid viewer of naruto too • hes proud that he influenced you • and on your dates oh my god the forehead • he styles his hair up and reveals the glorious forehead • and he pulls out the chair for you • or at least you _thought_ he was gonna pull it out for you hahah jk nop he sits on the chair • and you look at him like,,, wthyuk man • then he just stares at you like,,,,, what are you waiting for go sit down • have i mentioned that you now like justin bieber too because he blasts his songs everywhere • also ocassionally hits ravi up on helping to compose a song for you • and he wont play the track for you • he’ll sing it live in front of you with the piano and all • aw what a sweetheart • teaches you how to play overwatch • will use the chance to wrap his arms around you to guide you on using the mouse • but i mean he only taught you how to play it so that he can trash you at it and feel good about it • ice cream dates!! • literally you two could be walking down the street and he’d disappear for 0.01727 seconds and return with two ice cream cones • and like in all those romantic shows - you’d have a bit of ice cream at the corner of your mouth • but instead of using his finger to wipe it off he uses it as an excuse to kiss you but he licks the ice cream as well • and afterward he flushes really red and that just makes him cuter • because hes so tall he’d purposely tip toe to tease you so you cant kiss him • but also bends down loads for that lip kiss • and his chest has got to be the absolute best place to ever bury your face in • its so warm and when he embraces you like that you feel so protected and safe • would be the type to splurge on you unnecessarily because he feels like he doesnt do enough for you • when in reality he does • definition of protective boyfriend • like what,,,, do you think those arms are for display only • the other members treat you like a god • because they know if they dont hahah theyll end up like leo in that vixxtv episode (ep 72??)

(Side note: hi!!! This is our first post and we didn’t really have a legit intro but I’m chrissia and the other child in here is Janelle! I did Hakyeon, Taekwoon and hongbin and Janelle did Jaehwan Ravi and Hyuk!!) (yes hi im janelle HAHAH you can tell the difc i guess i use •s and chrissia uses -s so yeah thats cool)

#vixx #kpop #n #hakyeon #leo #taekwoon #jaehwan #ken #ravi #wonshik #hongbin #hyuk #sanghyuk

[notmusa]

sierraashura said: What are your all your characters favourite foods? ian likes those comfort foods, like grilled cheese or waffles. also beer. jules is all about that sushi 24/7/365 sushi day. & mcdonalds happy meal burgers. those shitty little burgers so good. donovan likes a good STEAK. & also a goodass catfish po'boy grandint said: are any of ur characters flexible and regardless can we see em try (I have a vivid image of ian in a yoga outfit liftin some weights) ian is in no way physically flexible. he will never be able to lick his elbow. jules has got those short legs so youd think she could touch her toes but no she cant she has those short arms too they just dont reach. don is surprisingly limber but its nothing to tell your mom about Anonymous said: a cpuple oc questions maybaps? are any of yr ocs trans? does ian have any specific mental illness, and how did he stop self harming if he has stopped that is (you dont have to answer the last one!) jules is genderfluid but uses she/her pronouns for the most part. i have a trans character in my head but i dont really bother drawing him much. he has a bunch of older sisters & when he came out as trans his very italian dad was like "dont tell your sisters but ive always wanted a son :) " ian has bipolar I disorder & some ptsd. & also substance abuse disorder. he hasnt really stopped self harming, but he only really gets the urge during mixed episodes Anonymous said: Ian and Don, answer for each other. What is your favorite thing about your partner? donovan: do my good looks and great personality count as one thing? ian: partner? favorite? about? Anonymous said: I'm gonna randomly kick Ian in the balls. ian: what? not there. thats the worst place to do that Anonymous said: If your OCs were Deadly Sins, which sins would they be? (Apologizing if this has already been asked I am new to this account) ian would b sloth, no contest. donovan is pride? i guess? but only physically. he likes to look good. jules is too pure and has never done anything wrong in her life mummu said: Does Ian have any expectations for his future? any dreams that he'd want to achieve? How about Donovan and Jules? :') I love them, they're all beautiful and perfect ♥ thank u pal. ian's future is a big scary blank slate that he tries not to think about too much. he never thought hed make it this far & its too late to join the 27 club. jules has been trying to decide if she wants to go to college for the past 3 years. her parents are college professors but, like, is it RIGHT for HER? donovan p much likes how his life is right now & has no big plans. lets just see what happens sadistic-tuba-junker said: Chara questions! How did they first meet? ian met jules bc they were both on similar time schedules & ian wanted some bagels from the bakery jules works at @ 4am. ian met donovan when ian got a job as a pianist for the band at the burlesque club where donovan is also a member of the band at. jules met donovan when ian was like "hey jules this is donovan" What were their first impressions of each other? ian didnt really notice donovan for a while. their first interaction ian probably just squinted at him until he got nervous & went to talk to someone else. donovan noticed ian on his first day tho & was like "this scruffy guy is amazing at the piano why havent i heard of him" & later he was like "this scruffy guy is v weird & i am intrigued." ians first impression of jules was "oh no this bagel elf is going to be mad at me" & vice-versa was "oh wow a hobo." and finally when jules met donovan she was v suspicious of him, like if u take advantage of my boy ill put a dead skunk under your mattress. donovans first impression of jules was why is ian friends w a 14 year old and why is she looking at me like that Has Ian ever tried teaching Donovan how to play piano? they went to FAO schwarz & played the big floor piano like tom hanks. JUST KIDDING ian never tried teaching donovan to play piano. Has Ian ever played video games? If so what games and did he enjoy them? ian likes to play pinball at bars. he also likes tetris. he likes to watch jules play vidgames but he doesnt really like playing them himself. Has Donovan ever worn a dress? (I just think he'd look nice in one) donovan has never had any desire to put on a dress but he is flattered you think hed look nice in one I really love your characters BTW and you artstyle is top notch! Love you you beautiful crustacean snip snip thank u Anonymous said: Ian can like.. lift? bro did u not see that one time ian lifted jules over his head and threw her 30 feet like a deadly pillow? she hit that ball pit at at least 80mph, there were balls everywhere, everybody clapped mcelboi said: can ian or donovan cook, or are they a takeout household? ian has no cooking ability beyond adding water & stirring. donovan can do basic stuff & follow recipes but whos got time for that. takeout all the way

#self harm / #character qs #part 4 #its still happening

[thehalfworld]

Fanfic MST: Forbiden Fruit: The Tempation of Edward Cullen, a Twilight fanfic [part 3]

I have to warn you all that this chapter has a rape scene in it. It’s completely ridiculous, and I really don’t know if that makes it better or worse. Proceed with caution.

Recap: Edward gave into tempation and tried putting the moves on Tiaa. She went along with it at first, but then pushed him away because they were in public and Edward already has a girlfriend. Edward seems to think Tiaa is a vampire, even though she doesn’t appear to be and his thinking she is doesn’t really make sense. 

Chapter 1 Previous chapter

AN - hi guys hope u like this one im quite proud of it! 

That’s a bit worrying.

thanx for the suport from my frends love u girls!glad u like it! oh an VINCENT ur so dumb of course tiaa didnt go to math in only her bra shes not a total ditz! 

Hey, you never said she put her shirt back on! Actually, you also described Edward ripping it off her, and we know it’s made out of fishnet, so… I kinda doubt she still has a shirt left to put back on.

one more time...DONT READ IF U DNT LIKE IT!

I can’t imagine not liking this story. I’m being serious. It’s a masterwork. It’s right up there with “My Immortal” in my eyes.

NO frickin flames what is the POINT of flamin ppl there is NO POINT so f off!

I think the point is to annoy the author. Which appears to be working.

Capter 3 – uncle larry

Wow! Really looking forward to the capter!

I sa t alone watching tv at dave and maries house. I couldnt stop thinking about my encounter with Ewdard Cullen earlier that day. He was so beuatifull and sexoy with such amazing hair and eyes I could hardly believe he had notice someone like me! 

Just me or is she a tad fixated on his hair?

Also… Tiaa isn’t the sort of girl who blends in, and she knows it. She’s aware that she’s pretty and she’s used to getting attention — both positive and negative — because of her looks. She’s also loud (she yelled at Edward when he bumped into her), and she dresses in a manner that… well, let’s just say most small-town high school students don’t dress like Tiaa. This girl isn’t ordinary and she’s well aware of it. Why the false modesty?

But I was angry at how he had made me feel, how I'd burnt like crimson hot flame wean he touched me and how he'd not listened to me when id' told him to fring off, and how he dared to touch me at all when he had a GF anyways, even if she was a mean girl with an ugly heart and not that hawt. 

Not only has she not met Bella yet, she hasn’t heard anyone talk about Bella either, so I don’t know how she came to the “she’s a mean girl with an ugly heart” conclusion.

But nomatter how much I try to hate him, I simply couldn't. Suddenly the phone range

"hello "

"hey, is that altantiana?"

"yah who is this?" I aksed.

"its Mike nooton from your class! 

She hasn’t met Mike yet either, unless that happened in the deleted scenes or something. I guess, if he called her house phone, that he could have got Dave and Marie’s number out of the school directory… but this seems a little weird if they’ve literally never met.

I was wondering if your wanted to go to La Plush with me too morrow night maybe? 

To clarify, he is talking about a beach. He means La Push. Stuffed animals are probably not involved.

Theres a party on the beech with whole crowd of us going and I thought you seemed relay nice so I thought maybe youd want to me my date please? -

I can maybe buy that a high school boy is desperate enough to ask a random pretty girl to a party with him in the hopes that maybe it’ll kindle some sort of romance, but this is a really bad way to go about it. Asking out a girl you’ve never met is… not the best plan. Why not just frame it as inviting her along because she’s a new student and it would be a good opportunity for her to hang out and make friends? You don’t have to be explicit about your crush before you’ve even had a conversation with her.

Also I think Mike is already dating Bella’s friend Jessica, but fuck her, I guess.

"arent you the guy who hangs out with all the pathetic chearleaders and stuff?" I asked

"you mean bella and jessica's gang? 

I’m gonna wait a bit to talk about how weird it is that Bella is hanging with a “gang” of cheerleaders, but like… why does Tiaa know Mike hangs out with them? Again, this is their first conversation, and (as far as we know) the first time she’s even heard of him.

Sometimes I guess but theyr'e way shallow and not as hot as you. 

He’s maybe undermining his own point there.

And they can be mean sometimes.-"

So… like anyone, then?

"then why do hang out white them then you shallow CREEP!and why are you askin me out when you harely no me mike! Cos u think im' hot? Why cant you see your just as shallow if you want to date someone just cost of what they look like - I'm not THAT pretty anyways! 

Oh, Tiaa, you and I were on the same page until you pulled the fake modesty card. Besides, isn’t this a bit of an overreaction? He asked you to hang out with him at the beach, it’s not like he’s proposing marriage or anything.

And even if i was, I'm SO screwed up in the bran you cant even imagine! u would no want to date me if you new how screwed up I was!"

What exactly does she mean by ���screwed up in the brain bran”? Like, are we talking legitimate mental illness, or is this just teenage angsting? And, in either case, what exactly is her problem that makes her undateable? This is about the vaguest possible rejection, and I don’t know if she’s implying something is actually wrong with her or that she’s just Not Like Other Girls.

"I would, tia, beleive me I would! Your so beautiful you cant even imagine. Your so pretty people lose there minds when your around and forget there names and forget to brethe! 

That’s your only reason? She’s pretty? Weren’t you saying something about cheerleaders being shallow a minute or two ago?

How can't you have noticed that? 

Decent point, actually. If your character is dropping jaws and turning heads with her beauty, either she’s aware she’s beautiful or there’s a reason she doesn’t realize. Like… maybe Tiaa thinks the people staring at her are doing so because of how she dresses, not because they think she’s pretty. Tiaa has actually seemed pretty aware of her effect on others throughout, though, so unless she’s just playing modest around Mike for some reason this scene doesn’t make any sense.

And I don't CARE how screwed up you are! It only maked you more interesting! 

He’s not even gonna ask for clarification on that?

Your cool and different and you are honest about stuff! you are right to be angry with me. I'm sorry for benign shallow and dumb just give me a chance to show you how much I care, please? "

The argument he’s making would probably be way more convincing if this wasn’t, you know, their first conversation ever.

"well...ok maybe ill go along if I dont have anything else to do" i said, not believing a word he said about how pretty i was.

Oh, come on.

"thank you altantiana thank you so much!" he sounded so happy I couldnt help but smile as I put the phone down but my smile faded as I return to my thoughts. Mike Nooton was kinda cute and seemed like an ok guy but he was nothing next to Ewdard Cullen. 

Yeah, I guess when compared to the weird dude who tried to fuck you in a locker room and threw a shirt at your head Mike really isn’t worth a second thought.

Even though I was anger with edward than I have ever been with anyone in my life and part of me wanted to chop his head off with a sore, a part of my soul would all ways remain in that coridoor where we had kissed so hard and passionably. 

My mistake, they were in a hallway, not a locker room. Not sure if that’s better or worse, but, depending on how busy that hallway normally is, it’s probably worse.

I creamed myself. 

Didn’t need to know that.

My heart had soared that day like never before, and i new that no one else would ever make me feel like that again, then I thought how he was a cheater and a bastard and my face burnt with shame. I couldn't beleive I had behaved like such a hore. 

I mean… she didn’t, really. She went along with his advances up to a point, and it doesn’t really show good judgement on her part, but he was the one acting like a “hore” in this situation. Putting the moves on a random girl in a public space when you’ve already got a girlfriend? Keep it classy, dude.

I was scared of the affect he had on me.

Effect. “Affect” is a verb. Nice sentence otherwise.

(Okay, if you’re a grammar pedant, “affect” isn’t always a verb… it can also be a noun, when we’re talking in a psychology context, which Tiaa isn’t.)

"bye tiaa! We'll be back on Thursday ok?" mari put her head rind the door suddenly

"Ok then, have fun" I wispered clammily..dave and marie where visiting relatives for a few day.

Convenient. Two less characters for the author to have to deal with.

Wait, no, oh my god, I just remembered what happens in this chapter.

"you look so pretty" she says, smiling -your the prettiest gril i've ever seen!”

I… okay, that’s some natural dialogue.

"omg whatever" I reply. I hated it wen people say that. 

Come on, girl, it’s just a compliment! Not like she’s hitting on you! At least I hope not.

I pulled my blond hair over my face. I was wearin a short hot pink dress cut low with black lace frills at the bottom and black lace stocking.

I kind of like that Tiaa is a goth girl who likes bright pink. There are plenty of real-life goth girls like that, but you pretty much never see them in fanfiction.

"daves brother larry will be looking after you wile where gone you'll be ok when where gone wont you tiaa? I hate to leaven you alone like this!"

You know “leaven” is what you do to bread to make it rise, right?

"i don't need a freakin babysiter u no!" i was so embarasing, I could look after myself!

Freudian slip? I mean, she is pretty embarrassing.

Marie smiles and leaves the house.

Marie doesn’t give a fuck, it seems.

"greeting a;latnaniana my names uncle larry" said uncle larry, he came in threw the door he was fat and bald with tiny black eyes and a red face

You know he’s a bad guy because he’s ugly. That’s how it works!

"Hey - i said

"your the orphan arent you" he says "is it true you kiled your mother when she gave birth to you?”

Nice to meet you too, Uncle Larry.

"Wat!" I cry, my eyes filling with tears

"your an evil bich arent u? Go outsite and wash my car" he shouts angerly

I’ve just thought of a fun game. There are five more chapters left. Let’s all place bets on which chapter Uncle Larry will get horribly murdered in.

I stood up and left to wash his car. I got soap and a bucket, afraid of what he would do if I refuzed. I went outside and started to wash hush car it was a red porche. He came outside and wached me and I new he was waching me! 

I know the implication is he’s watching her in a pervy way, but if I was making someone wash my car and I didn’t particularly like them I’d keep an eye on them too.

After a minite he came over and hit me hard across the face

"wft!" i shouted

What Fuck The?

He poored the bucket of water all over me and hit me again,. I was wet and crying and he started to rip my dress and bra of me and rip my clothes. He touched my naked breats and I try to push him off me I screamed at him to stop but he did'nt. He bent me over the bonet of his car and spanked me on the ass for half an hour then he pulled my panties down and started to rape me!

I really don’t want to be laughing at a rape scene, because rape is one of those things that’s just inherently unfunny, but… this is testing me. I mean, an entire half hour of spanking? The dramatic announcement that he began raping her after he forcibly stripped her naked and spanked her for thirty minutes, as if this is a surprise? The fact that all of this is happening in plain view of any neighbors Dave and Marie might have? Good lord. I truly do not know how to react.

I also have to wonder why Tiaa makes little attempt to fight back here. It’s pretty reasonable to freeze up when you’re violently attacked, but Tiaa has proven that she’s both capable and willing to fight off anyone she perceives as a threat (kung fu babie!) previously in the story. Is Uncle Larry too physically powerful for her to win against? We don’t really know how big he is compared to her, and Tiaa has been described as strong and fast previously. Both of them are unarmed, and, if there are neighbors, the noise should alert someone to what’s going on (Tiaa has been shouting/screaming throughout). Why is he getting away with all this? Oh, right, plot reasons.

"stop raping me!" I cry but he didnt stop! 

Shocker.

The pain was terrible even tough his manhood was small. 

Didn’t need to know about his dick, thanks!

I cryed and cryed but he didnt stop for hours and when he finally stopped he left me on the floor and spat in my face and left me there. 

Wait… hours? This guy has impressive stamina.

I pulled on my clothes and cryed madly and ran off into the seething darkness of the midnight street. I ran and ran un till I came to some woods and then I fell down in the woods and cryed.

“Seething darkness of the midnight street” is a pretty good phrase, actually. I mean, super cheesy and doesn’t really mean anything, but if this was lyrics some alt-rock band wrote I’d accept it.

Suddenly a blast of white light exploded in head and my mark on my hand burned like a flame. I closed my eyes and saw the face of a tall white man looking over me with no expression, his eyes were burning red and his face glimmered cold and bright as the moon,. 

It was… VLODEMONT AND DA DETH DEALERS!

I fell back from the brightness of his body, his hair was dark as night,.

It was… VOLSEMORT IN A WIG AND DA DEATH DEELRS!

"atlantiana?" he whisperd in a voice softer than clouds -my daughter?-

Well, we all saw that one coming a mile off.

"omg" I whisperd as my mind went blank and the world went dark.

I hope she whispered the acronym instead of saying “oh my god.” Her dad will be totally confused! Old people don’t know how acronyms work!

Next chapter

#forbidenfruit.mst #fandom:twilight #halfworld.mst

[tumblunni]

Hmm thinking more about that old idea i had about one of those armybuilding strategy game things except you play as an alien virus invading earth. Make ur resources out of le peoples! Itd be kinda like splatoon crossed with..like..that card game in ff9? Flip a tile to your colour by defeating a human battalion, and get combos if other ones line up right. (Representing monsterified soldiers infecting their comrades) And then also once a tile is captured itd slowly gain resource points to represent being terraformed by the virus, with a funky visual change when its finished. You can spawn new units from these completed strongholds, without having to infect human bodies. (But these infinate access minions would be weaker to balance the gameplay)

Oh and also the virus hivemind's personality is a very cheerful and goofy mom figure who doesnt understand that what theyre doing is wrong. Just very lonely and wants to help everyone by bringing them into the hive. And doesnt really know how humans work so they end up as twisted monstrosities. Maybe represnet that in gameplay by infected units evolving after taking enough damage? Like the kind alien friend is trying to fix their lil buddies but only knows how their own biology works and not humans. So they do become stronger every time they get repaired, but they also get more beserk and dangerous.

Oh and also maybe have some special units who are people with a strong enough will to maintain some degree of personality within the virus hive? And they could be unkillable because that mind continues to resurface even when its body is destroyed, and can be rehoused in a new shell for the next fight. And then maybe by using one of them a lot and levelling it up youd be able to see visions of their human memories. And seeing all of these and forming attatchment with these people would help the virus understand the morality of what its doing, and maybe ultimately be potentially redeemable.

Oh and also your tutorial character would be "this one". A lil girl who was the first virus infectee, so her conciousness remains the most distinct within your collective. Her personality is very stoic and serious and more of what you'd expect from an evil virus, often being the rational voice to our protagonist's goofy "IM WANNA BE FREMDS BY ZOMBIEING THE ALL" nonsense. She also maintains a relatively humanoid shape compared to other "general" type units, since the virus is keeping this personality separate as a way of learning about humans. It also comes in handy to trick humans (which is usually the girl's idea cos the virus isnt really smart enough) Oh and she only calls herself "this one", as in "i'm just one of many bodies you assimilated, why would you need to know what name i used to have?" I think that kinda technically she's the cause of this whole catastrophe. She acts so emotionless and eager to give up her humanity because she was severely depressed at the time she met that "falling star" and became the first virus carrier. So because she was the first she became the template for how the virus sees humans, it just saw a suffering child and worried that everyone was suffering, and wanted to help! But its very confused and the only way it knows to help is to literally overwrite their minds with its happy peace energy. (And also occasionally additional limbs!) I think maybe the poor kid was being abused by her father and the alien virus actually saved her from him, so that's why she's so loyal to it and never wants to go back to being human. For her she really does think that "be happy but lose everything" is a worthwhile deal, she's just that desperate for a kind parental figure like this. Always dreamed of some fairy godmother whisking her away to a happier home, so maybe a sentient biohazard whisking her to space is good enough?

Anyway once goofy virus mom learns humanity and regrets their actions, the good ending would be them releasing everyone they infected and heading off back to space so they wont hurt anyone anymore. And the lil kid is still there, tugging at their sleeve. Please dont go! So maybe neither of them have to be alone, and maybe there's a way to solve sadness without burying it in artificial happiness. Maybe they could find that elusive true happiness together!

FBI guy: uhhh yeah we counted one more survivor than we're supposed to have?

Virus in a human disguise: i am just normalle momther, no suspicion here

And then lol.i dunno some sort of sitcom shenanigans with this abomination trying to blend in with the PTA group and support their daughter's piano recitals

Its a very random story. Im very tired.