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#fatws fluff
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The Thin Line | Bucky Barnes
Bucky Barnes x fem!reader
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Summary: Of one thing you were certain—Bucky Barnes hated you, and you hated him. How could you not, considering the super soldier had made it his personal mission to make your life a living hell after you had been assigned to protect him? But there was someone after Bucky from his past, and now he was forced to work alongside you to stop them. And in the process, you would find out just how thin that line was between love and hate.
A/N: This one comes from this request that I received a while back! I have been criminally slow in responding and I sincerely apologize. Hopefully this makes up for it a little bit 🤍
Warnings: blood and violence (all canon for the MCU), someone takes a severe beating (may or may not be reader), ANGST, fluff scattered here and there, fatws!Bucky, banter, mature themes and allusions, grumpy!Bucky
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Hate. There was perhaps no other word as final and lasting as hate. 
People had always said that there was a thin line between love and hate, that the two emotions were so similar it was often hard to tell them apart. But not to you. You knew the line between them distinctly. 
You had seen people fall out of love as easily as the winking out of a candle, and in the same manner you’d watched a person’s hate burn on even past the grave. You couldn’t understand how someone could mix up the two emotions, not when love had always seemed so fleeting and hate so persistent. 
What you didn’t know just yet was that the passion involved in both love and hate often danced upon that line you were so sure was distinct to you. You didn’t know that love, real love was barely an emotion at all. And you certainly didn’t know that when one person truly loved another, it was anything but fleeting. 
It was the one thing that lasted longer than hate. 
But it wasn’t your fault that you didn’t know. After all, how could you? You’d never known real love.
At least, not yet.
|||
The sky seemed to sparkle as the rare sunshine blasted through the clouds and beamed down upon the city of Brooklyn. 
But in this moment, you couldn’t fully appreciate its glory. No, not when this happened to be the day you were moving box after box of your belongings into your new apartment. The dazzling sun dared to make you collapse under its rays as you hauled out the last box of your stuff from your car. Sweat slipped down your spine as you managed to slam the trunk shut while balancing the box precariously on one hand. With a huff, you gripped the last box tightly and swiveled towards your apartment complex for the last time. 
By the time you’d managed to get into the lobby and over to the elevator, you were practically dreaming of being able to drop down this last box into your new apartment and drop dead on your new couch. You could almost taste the beer you’d picked up on your way into the city and-
“You have got to be kidding me!” You exclaimed, dread coursing through your frame as you read the sign taped onto the elevator doors. 
Out of Service.
“Sorry ‘bout that,” The concierge called, leaning on his desk and offering you an uncaring smile, “Stupid thing’s been breaking down all month.”
And you haven’t fixed it yet?
The angry words stayed in your head as you decided with a long sigh that the argument wasn’t worth it. 
“That’s fine,” You gritted out, adjusting your hold on the box, “I’ll just take the stairs.”
“Good luck,” The concierge wished, his tone bored. 
Not even an offer to help you? The urge to yell at the worker was growing by the second, but you were determined to start this mission out right. Gritting your teeth, you walked over to the stairs and started climbing them without giving yourself time to hesitate. This was going to be a long journey up, and you’d rather get it over with as fast as possible. 
By the time you reached your floor, your arms were trembling with effort and your legs were moments from giving out. You took the last step up the stairs onto your floor, letting out a sigh of relief as you paused only for a moment. Just a few more steps and you’d be at your door. 
You took half of a step when someone slammed right into you. With the box obstructing your view, you couldn’t see the person coming and they clearly hadn’t seen you. You let out a yelp as you stumbled back towards the stairs behind you. In sudden panic to not tumble down them, you released the box you were holding to free your hands. Just as you were grappling for a railing or something to keep you from falling, a gloved hand gripped your arm and yanked you forward, away from the stairs. 
You stumbled right back into the person who had just collided with you seconds prior. As you fell into their hard chest, you were bewildered since you were sure you had dropped the box right…
As you glanced up, you saw the box you had released resting easily on one of the stranger’s hands. His other was still holding your arm, and it was then that you realized that his hand was ice cold. Even with the glove on. With furrowed brows, you glanced up towards the stranger.
“Thank-” Your words died abruptly as your eyes met steel blue ones burning down at you. His hair was shorter and his face was drawn into a look of slight annoyance, but it was him. Your mission had run into you before you could even move into your apartment, “You.”
James Buchanan Barnes released your arm, his stubbled jaw clenched in the way you figured it often was. You would be lying if you said it was only your mission that made your thinking halt so swiftly, because none of his pictures did Bucky’s roguish beauty justice. He was ruggedly, painfully, hopelessly handsome, and you scrambled to collect your mind.
“Don’t mention it,” Came Bucky’s low reply. His voice shot straight through you, setting your hairs on end and stirring something in your chest. With easy strength that now made sense, Bucky held onto your box with one hand, “Moving in today?”
It took every ounce of your strength not to giggle. His words were strained and almost…awkward. You knew he didn’t talk much anymore, but it was hopelessly adorable how he was trying to make small talk. With a smile you kept restrained, you nodded.
“In that unit right there, actually,” You replied, walking over to your door and turning back towards the super soldier, “Thanks for saving my box.”
“I think I saved more than that,” Bucky quipped, his tone smooth and rough all at once. You raised an eyebrow at the man.
His arrogant charm was still intact, that’s for sure.
“Well thanks for that too,” You responded, pulling your keys from your pocket and unlocking your door. As you shouldered it open, you held out your hands to take the box back.
You could tell he wanted to carry the box in for you, a remnant of the 40’s manners that were ingrained deep within him. You kept your hands out for the box, to which Bucky gave in swiftly. You breathed a quiet sigh of relief as he did. Had he brought it in for you, he would have seen the surveillance equipment and weapons scattered about the unpacked apartment. 
“Well, I’m next door if you need anything.” Bucky stepped back once you had the box in your hands, half of your body inside your open door. You smiled at him, internally cheering that this mission had already begun on such a great foot. 
“Nice to meet you, neighbor,” You announced, your trained eyes taking in the bags underneath his eyes and the tense hold of his frame, “I’m Y/N.”
He hesitated only for a moment, “Bucky.”
And just like that, he had turned on his heel and walked away towards the stairs. You watched him go for a second, intrigue filtering into your gaze. He was distant and detached like you had expected, and the air of grumpiness he bore was unmistakable. But there was a softness to him that you couldn’t deny. Only a touch, but it was there.
Before he could see you watching him, you fully entered your apartment and made sure the door shut behind you. Setting the box down with a huff, you settled your hands onto your hips and surveyed the controlled chaos before you. A few handguns lay strewn around, and your secured technology was piled atop the couch you so desperately wanted to drop onto. 
But you couldn’t sleep, not just yet. There was work to be done.
Out of your entire CIA division, you were the operative that Sam Wilson had tasked with keeping an eye on his lone wolf of a friend. Even though Sam knew he could take care of himself, he had asked you to keep tabs on Bucky to ensure he was safe, especially since the Winter Soldier had racked up a list of enemies just dying to exact revenge now that the world was back to semi-normal. 
But this wasn’t the Winter Soldier. This was Bucky Barnes, and even though you knew he could handle his own, you were not going to take this mission lightly. You would look out for him, make sure he didn’t drop off the grid like he loved to do, make sure no rogue enemies took him down.
You would protect him, even though you knew Bucky would kill you and Sam if he found out. 
So, you would just have to keep him from finding out.
|||
It had been almost two months since you moved in, and the most you had talked with Bucky since your first encounter was in passing on the stairs and the occasional elevator ride. 
Of course, you had formatted your daily routine to oppose his perfectly, ensuring you would run into him as many times as passable for coincidence in a day. Even with that, though, all you managed to get out of Barnes was a nod or the occasional hello. He truly was a lone wolf—quiet, grumpy as hell, and, well, alone.
Even with his avoidance of you and all other humans in general, you managed to survey him nearly every day. It had been quiet. No intruders, no threats, no disappearances. Physically, he was perfectly safe. Mentally? 
You shook your head at the thought. Bucky needed a life. And social interaction. Sam called you often, wondering if he was still alive considering how much Bucky dodged his texts. It was almost like he wanted to be separated. Like he was punishing himself for something. 
That last thought rang through your mind as you started cleaning the dishes you had acquired from your dinner. As the warm, sudsy water ran across your fingers and over the pot you were washing, your brows were furrowed in concentration. If Bucky really was keeping his distance on purpose, maybe protecting him physically wouldn’t be the object of this mission. 
But you weren’t trained for that. You were trained for gun fights and strategy and high-level, covert operations. You were trained to infiltrate criminal holdings and take down dangerous individuals. You were trained to attack, protect, defend, strategize. 
That’s why you noticed that Bucky Barnes’ door didn’t open precisely at the same time that it had every night for two months. 
You paused in your dish-washing, setting down the pot into the sink and turning off the faucet. Letting silence cloak your apartment, you listened closely for the sound of his footsteps or the shutting of his door. 
Nothing. 
He could be running late, but Bucky never ran late. He never-
There was the smallest shuffle of a foot against your wooden floor.
You shot your hand out and grabbed the knife you had just washed, but you were a moment too slow. Just as your hand closed around the handle and you began to turn around, your back was shoved into your fridge and the knife ripped out of your hand. 
Before you could even blink, Bucky Barnes had you pinned against the fridge with his metal hand around your throat. 
Your pulse ratcheted up painfully, your eyes wide as you gripped onto his metal wrist. His grip wasn’t constricting your airway, but was applying enough pressure to remind you that your life was currently in his grasp. Bucky was close to you, so close that you could see the flecks of gray in his blue eyes as well as the fury that crossed through them.
“Who the hell are you?” His voice sent a shiver down your spine. It was dark and rough and even, and it should not have had the effect on you that it did. 
His body heat poured into you with how close he was to you, and the cold metal of his hand was a sharp contrast. Breathing was difficult, and not entirely because of his hand on your throat. There was something in the air between you, something thick and palpable. You swallowed, keeping your breathing as even as you could.
“Your neighbor,” You responded, not entirely having to fake the tremble in your tone.
“Bullshit,” Bucky growled, his grip on your throat tightening the slightest bit, “You’ve been tailing me for weeks. Who do you work for?”
“Just because our schedules clash doesn’t mean-”
“If one more lie comes out of your pretty little mouth, I’ll make sure whoever hired you is the only one who knows your death wasn’t an accident.” Bucky was unflinching, cold hard rage burning across his features. Beneath it, though, you could see fear. So much fear. It made your heart nearly crumble. 
He was scared you were here to hurt him.
“I’m with the CIA,” you finally whispered, your tone no longer shaking despite his outright threat. For some reason, you knew he would not hurt you, “I’m here to watch out for you, make sure you’re safe.”
Bucky’s grip on your throat lessened the slightest bit, and his brows furrowed as he tried to make sense of why the CIA would surveil him. Not giving him a chance to speak, you continued, “And I’m pretty sure the person who hired me would come here and beat your ass himself if you killed me.”
You paused, nodded your head to the side slightly and said more to yourself than him, “Well, he’d try.”
“Who hired you?” Bucky repeated, his tone less harsh than before, but just as dark.
You took a beat to consider your options, but conceded defeat with a sigh, “Sam Wilson.”
Being so close to him, you could see every emotion that flashed through his face. As you watched him work through anger to frustration to annoyance, his grip on your throat loosened until his hand was just resting against your neck. 
“Unbelievable,” Bucky grumbled, pulling his hand off of your neck and stepping back in one swift motion. 
You let out a full breath, bringing a hand up to touch your throat where his metal hand had just been. You felt suddenly cold without his body heat by you, but it was a cold that you welcomed. If this was how he was going to thank you for trying to help him then you couldn’t wait to be away from him.
You looked over to see Bucky a few strides away, his phone pressed to his ear and his hand on his hip.  Before you could speak to him, whoever he was calling must have picked up, but you didn’t have to guess at who it was.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Bucky suddenly exploded, his jaw tight. Whatever Sam said didn’t appease him because his exasperation only intensified.
“You Sharon Carter’ed me!” Bucky gritted out, “Steve was clueless so he didn’t notice until she was on his doorstep with a gun, but did you really think I wouldn’t?”
“Sharon Carter’ed?” You mumbled, confused. Shaking your head, you took a step closer to Bucky, “Listen, if you’ll just give me a minute to explain,”
Bucky stopped you, pointing in your direction, “No, you don’t get to talk here.”
Shock crashed over you as he continued to argue with Sam over the phone. Indignation flared within your chest and you sputtered for a moment, trying to comprehend the fact that he had just shushed you in your own apartment. 
“Nuh uh,” You interrupted, anger flaring hot in your veins as you stormed over to Bucky, “This is my apartment and you do not get to waltz in here, choke me out, then tell me I can’t speak.”
“You choked her out?” Sam shouted on the other side of the phone, so loud even you could hear it. Bucky’s eyes were hard as he dropped the phone to his side and took a step closer to you. He was menacing when he wanted to be, and right now, towering over you with a quiet sort of anger, he was. If only you scared easily.
“Oh really?” He nearly whispered, his anger flooding down at you. You could see him getting more frustrated the longer you stared him down right back, your chin tilted up and your gaze as leveled with his as it could be considering his height and stature, “You’ve been spying on me for weeks and now I’m the one invading your space?”
“I wasn’t spying on you, I was looking out for you. If you haven’t noticed, your friend is a little more than worried about you!” You fired back. You heard Sam saying something on the phone, but it was still down by Bucky’s side. 
The two of you were staring each other down, that same thick tension in the air. Not thinking about the consequences, you reached down and snatched the phone from Bucky’s grasp and turned it on speaker. 
Bucky looked at you in pure shock, as if he couldn’t believe you’d actually just taken the phone from him.
“You’re on speaker now, Sam,” You informed. 
“Finally,” Sam sighed over the phone, his tone surprisingly even and patient, “Buck, you gotta understand where I’m coming from. You don’t answer anyone’s texts, you don’t check in, and I know for a fact you’ve had one or two unwelcome visitors at your door.”
“I can handle myself, Sam,” Bucky gritted out. 
“I know you can, but you shouldn’t have to! I know that it’s hard with Steve gone, so-”
“No, you don’t know.” Bucky’s voice was final, and Sam paused, not seeming to fight with his statement. Bucky stared down at the floor, his arms crossed over his chest. 
You couldn’t help but stare at him. There was a sadness in those words, one that nearly shattered your heart. Your anger towards the super soldier softened the slightest bit.
“You’re right, I don’t,” Sam conceded, “But I’m trying to reach out here. We don’t have many people left, man. I don’t want to lose another friend.”
That seemed to soften the edge of Bucky’s frustration so deeply that even the frown set into his face disappeared. In its place was resignation. 
“I’m not here to intrude on your life,” You chimed in, making Bucky glance up to you, “I’m just here to make sure you’re safe.”
“I don’t need a babysitter,” Bucky grumbled. 
“I’m not your babysitter,” You assured, “And trust me, after tonight I want to spend as little time around you as you do around me. So, let’s make a deal. I keep to myself and you don’t break into my place and try to kill me in my sleep.”
Bucky hesitated, his eyes surveying you closely. On the phone between you, Sam piped up, “And you have to answer my texts.”
Bucky groaned, running a hand through his short, dark hair before shaking his head. After what seemed like an eternity, he sighed in defeat, and you couldn’t stop the small smile of victory that tugged on your lips.
“Fine,” He gave in, his eyes turning up to lock with yours, “But if I see you tailing me one more time, deal’s off.”
“No promises,” You responded boldly, your heart pounding strangely as Bucky took a menacing step closer to you.
“Then no promises about breaking in,” He shot back. The two of you glared intensely at each other until a voice called out from the phone.
“Alright you two, knock it off,” Sam ordered, sounding so incredibly tired, “Now can I please go? You caught me right in the middle of my beauty sleep.”
You chuckled softly, a smile ghosting your lips again, “Bye Sam,”
You ended the call and handed the phone back to Bucky, who you found already staring at you. You couldn’t place the look in his gaze, but it seemed akin to disdain, so your smile dropped. 
“How did you even get into my apartment?” You asked. Bucky kept his arms crossed over his chest, making his biceps bulge against his long-sleeve Henley.
“You tell me, you’re CIA,” He shrugged, looking too smug, “Or should I call Sam back and tell him he sent a novice to babysit me?”
“Stay out of trouble, Barnes,” Was all you said back, your jaw held tight.
“Have fun with your dishes,” Bucky dryly responded, brushing past you without another word towards your door. Frustration bubbled up within your gut, and it took every ounce of your patience to not turn and yell right back at him. So, taking a deep breath, you turned and watched him open your apartment door.
He paused and glanced back over at you before he was fully out, “And stay out of my way. I’m doing this for Sam, not because I need your help.”
Then he slammed your door and left. 
Taking all of your energy not to scream, you let out another sigh and put a hand to your forehead. Gone was the distant, polite neighbor. You had failed epically, but you couldn't from here on out. 
Bucky Barnes was going to make your life hell, and you already dreaded every second to come.
|||
Over the next month, your nods and hello’s in passing turned into grunts and, if you were lucky enough, the occasional insult you could fire back at.
In short, you loathed Barnes. 
Looking back, you couldn’t fathom how his handsome features had drawn you in when you first met. Sure, he was still stupidly attractive, but now it was more frustrating than it was something to fawn over. 
You still did your job as best you could, but you counted the days until Sam could come up to New York and take over the mission for you.
Currently, you were mulling over ways to subtly infuriate Barnes more than you already did as you walked back to your apartment complex from your run. You tried to get out and run at a park nearby a few times a week, but considering how much you hated running, you’d missed a few weeks in the process. 
Today, though, you just had to go. You needed to clear your head after you bumped into Barnes this morning and he informed you that somehow, the potted plant hanging on your balcony “accidentally” ended up on the ground five stories down. 
As you walked back into the cool lobby of your apartment building, you glanced up at the stairs that sat right beside the elevator. You paused for just a moment, considering if you should be healthy and take the stairs. That moment was swifter than you’d like to admit as you turned towards the elevator only to find the doors closing. 
Against the protest of your legs sore from your run, you jogged over to the elevator, “Hey, hold the doors!”
As you approached, you saw a hand shoot through and stop the doors from closing just in time. As they opened back up, you sighed in relief, an easy smile on your features, “Thanks. I-”
As you stepped into the elevator, your words died. As you and the person who had held the elevator for you locked eyes, the both of you groaned. 
“You have got to be kidding me,” You grumbled at the same time as Bucky Barnes.
The elevator doors shut, closing you into one of your worst nightmares—the two of you stuck together in a confined space. The air was heavy and the tension high, an uneasy silence settling in the air. Your chest tightened slightly and your body tensed up, almost as if you were waiting for something to happen. Deciding to be civil, you looked over at Bucky and offered him a cordial smile.
“Had a good day so far?” You asked, your voice strained. 
Bucky just shook his head, “If you try to make small talk right now, I will throw you into the elevator shaft.”
Your smile dropped instantly, replaced by a grimace, “You are so violent, you should really talk to your therapist about all that pent up anger.”
“I hate you,” Bucky grumbled. 
“Well that makes two of us.”
Almost as if on cue, the elevator comes to a grinding halt. The stop is so sudden that it jolts the box, making you gasp and grab onto the railing along the wall opposite Bucky. 
“What the hell?” Bucky grits out, walking up and pushing the button to your floor repeatedly. When that doesn’t work, he pushes the emergency button only to have no response. That button must have been broken too.
Realizing suddenly your predicament, you brought a hand to the bridge of your nose, “This is not happening.”
Of all the times for the stupid elevator to break down, it chose now? When you were stuck inside with the one person in the world who hated you the most?
“Hello?” Bucky called out, banging on the side of the elevator. 
“Yeah, ‘cause that’s gonna fix it,” You criticized, shaking your head at Bucky. 
“Well what else are we supposed to do? The damn help button won’t work,” He fired back.
“I know you were born almost a century ago, but we have these things called cell phones and they do this magical thing where we can call for help.” You pulled out your phone and showed him the emergency call screen for show. Shaking his head, Bucky grumbled something about “insufferable” under his breath as you called for help.
While you were on the phone with emergency services, you explained your situation only to be told the fire department was caught up and wouldn’t be able to help for another hour. 
“An hour?!” You exclaimed, already planning how you were going to beat the hell out of the management team for not fixing the stupid elevator. 
“I’m sorry, that’s the best we can do,” The emergency operator apologized. Suddenly feeling guilty for you outburst on the poor worker just doing their job, you sighed. 
“No, don’t be. It’s not your fault. Thanks for the help,” You amended, your tone softer this time. After hanging up, you slipped the phone into your pocket. 
“Well, looks like we’re stuck here for a while so get-,” Your words halted abruptly when you looked up and saw Bucky opening the doors of the elevator by force, “What the hell are you doing?”
“Getting out of here,” He gritted back, shoving open the doors easily. You almost laughed when he was met with a solid brick wall. With a smug smile, you tilted your head at the soldier.
“You were saying?” You sweetly taunted. He shot you a death glare as he let go of the elevator doors, allowing them to shut back. 
“It’s gotta be an easy fix,” Bucky mumbled to himself, walking back to the wall opposite you and beginning to bang on the side of the elevator. 
You gasped as the elevator box began to tremble under his hits and you lurched forward, grabbing his bicep to stop his assault, “Stop! You’re gonna send us plummeting straight to the basement.”
“Well then maybe I’ll get lucky,” He grunted, shaking off your hold and going to hit it again. This time, real fear hit you. 
“If we drop, you’d make it unscathed,” You began, and Bucky didn’t even look at you. 
“Exactly, so what’s the-”
“I wouldn’t.” Your words are softer than even you’d expected, but it managed to halt Bucky’s assault on the side of the elevator. He glanced back at you, and in that moment you understood exactly what hung in the air unspoken. He was a super soldier, you were a normal human. 
He couldn’t respond before the elevator gave a sick jolt.
You gasped, your knees nearly buckling from the fall. Before either of you could react, the elevator was careening down in a free-fall. You barely had time to scream when Bucky’s strong arm was around your waist and tugging you close, pressing you between the elevator wall and his body. He held you in a death grip, locking you against him and effectively saving your life.
Luckily, just as quickly as the fall had started, it stopped with a brain-shaking halt. 
The silence that followed was thick, and you didn’t realize you were gripping Bucky’s shoulders until your mind finally was convinced you weren’t going to fall to your death. Coming to your senses, you felt your body pressed tightly up against Bucky’s and looked up to see him staring down at you, his brows drawn together and the hate in his eyes missing. 
It was then that you realized you could no longer ignore the tension that was present whenever he was near you, because in this position it was overwhelming. 
The moment was over as soon as it had begun. You were shoving him off almost as soon as he was letting you go. Breathless, you shoved Bucky’s shoulder, “What the hell, Barnes? You could have gotten us killed!”
“Then you would have failed your stupid mission,” Bucky pointed out, only making you angrier. 
“You are infuriating,” You seethed, holding your hands out in exasperation, “Are you trying to get me to quit? Are you that insistent on shoving everyone else away?”
Bucky shook his head, his jaw held tight and his blue eyes on fire. He was staying silent, shutting down again like he often did. That only made you angrier, but a part of you yearned to get closer, to prove to him that you weren’t going to leave him.
Once again, as if on cue, the elevator began to move again with a jolt. You let out a breath of relief, your anger turning into exhaustion. Just as the elevator stopped, this time at your floor, you got off first, Bucky close behind.
“Fine, give me the cold shoulder,” You called out to him as you approached your door beside his. You fished out your keys and stopped, looking over at him as he ignored you and worked to open his door, “Do what you have to, but I’m not leaving you.”
Bucky froze, turning to look at you. Something in his gaze stirred your heart, but you kept your gaze strong and unflinching, “I’m seeing this mission through, whether you like it or not.”
Then you opened your door and went inside, leaving Barnes out in the hallway, still frozen with his keys in his door. 
|||
That night, you couldn’t get to sleep. 
You tried everything—sleeping supplements, reading, counting sheep. Nothing worked. Your mind refused to settle down, running over your elevator encounter with Bucky over and over again. The way he seemed to stall when you said you weren’t leaving him, the way he had grabbed you the instant the elevator dropped, the way you could still feel the burn of his arm around your waist. 
The way being held by him had felt so infuriatingly right. 
You covered your face with your pillow, willing yourself to forget what you just couldn’t seem to. You didn’t have to try long when the sound of something scraping on glass caught your attention. Slowly, you pulled the pillow off of your face and listened closely, the silence of your apartment settling over you like a blanket. 
Maybe you had dreamt the noise. Maybe Bucky really was getting to you head and it was making you cr-
There it was again.
You sat up this time, your brows furrowed as you swiftly got out of bed. With silent feet, you crept to your window and pulled down one blind just enough for you to peer out into the dark night illuminated only by the haze of streetlights below. 
Nothing. Nothing, nothing…there. 
In the murky night, your strained eyes caught a glimpse of a rope hanging down off to the left of your window. Towards Bucky’s apartment. Looking a bit harder, you saw another, and then another. Then, now that you were listening, you began to hear the soft thuds of shoes against brick and iron and glass.
Someone was going to break through his window.
Suddenly vaulted into action, you jogged out of your room, grabbing the gun you kept on your nightstand as you did. You didn’t stop to consider the fact that you were only in a large t-shirt with no pants on. The only thing you could think about was Bucky sleeping next door while those intruders busted into his windows. In a matter of seconds, you were out into the hallway and pounding on Bucky’s door. 
“Barnes, let me in,” You hissed, your voice low so as not to wake the neighbors. When there was no response, you pounded your fist against the door again. The sound mocked the repetitive thumping of your heart within your chest, its beats not only for the fight to come or the sudden burst of energy. 
“Come on!” You pressed, in the middle of another round of knocking when the door flew open. On the other side, a very pissed and very shirtless Bucky stood, his muscular arm barring the doorway.
“This better be good,” Bucky grumbled, his voice closer to a low growl. 
If this were any other time, you would have taken a moment to appreciate the sculpted plane of his body or even to notice the blanket strewn on the hardfloor indicating he didn’t sleep in a bed. You didn’t worry about any of that, though. Instead, you shoved past Bucky as soon as that door was opened, your gun raised.
“What the hell are you-”
Bucky was cut off by the shattering of his window.
You had four rounds fired off before the first two intruders could set their feet in the apartment. The blasts were muffled by the sound suppressor on your gun, but they found their targets with no less force or deadly precision. 
“Shit,” Bucky cursed, the sound of his dog tags clinking as he sprinted over to the window just as the third and fourth intruders touched down. This time, these two made it down, the bullets lodging in the wall or their vests. 
Then Bucky was on them, his metal arm catching one by the throat while he kicked the absolute shit out of the other, sending the intruder flying into the wall. The plaster cracked behind him and you shoved your gun into your waistband, no longer able to fire without risking hitting Bucky. 
As Bucky incapacitated the intruder he had by the throat, you made sure the one he kicked stayed down. As the attacker staggered to his feet and rushed you, you dodged his clumsy hits easily and landed a crushing uppercut to the underside of his jaw. The sound of his teeth snapping together was sickening, but you were unfazed. 
As the large attacker stumbled back, you rushed him and slid to the ground. You wrapped your legs around one of his and tugged, bringing the large invader crashing to the ground with a force that made the floor shudder. Moving quickly, you maneuvered yourself on top of the downed intruder and whipped out your gun, holding it directly at his head.
Suddenly, the apartment was silent except for the panting of both you and Bucky. You glanced up to see Bucky standing over the invader he was fighting, his bare chest heaving with breath. Probably more out of shock than exertion, you figured.
Turning your gaze down to the one pinned beneath you, you held the gun steady, “Who do you work for?”
The man smiled up at you, his teeth full of blood, “You’ll have to kill me,”
“Okay,” You said simply, moving the barrel of your gun to his shoulder and pulling the trigger. 
The invader let out a strangled cry of pain at the nonfatal injury, his body writhing beneath you. 
“Let’s try this again,” You gritted out, pushing the gun closer to his chin, “You tell me who you work for, or the next shot goes into your brain.”
“He’ll kill me for telling you,” The man nearly sobbed.
“Who’s he?” Bucky growled, staring down at the attacker mercilessly. When he didn’t respond, you clenched your jaw.
“Either die now for not telling us, or die later with a chance of making it away. Your choice.” Your words rang through the room as both you and Bucky stared down this terrified intruder. A pang of sympathy ran through you that was quickly smothered because in the end, he had come after Bucky.
And for some reason, that made your vision bleed red.
“Kingpin,” He finally cried, his eyes shut as his blood seeped into Bucky’s floor, “Kingpin sent us to silence the Winter Soldier.”
You had to fight to keep the shock from your features long enough to whip the butt of your gun across the blubbering man’s face and knock him out. Once he was silent beneath you, you stood slowly and looked over to Bucky. His jaw was clenched and his eyes holding that same haunted look they often did.
“I had a run-in with Kingpin as the Winter Soldier,” Bucky muttered, his eyes trained down on the floor where the four intruders were, “I managed to get past his defenses, tore through them like paper. What I found nearly sent him to prison for good if Hydra hadn't cut him a deal.” 
The words broke over you, making your mind whir, “So if he’s coming after you now, after all this time,” 
Bucky looks up at you, his blue eyes nearly knocking your bravado out, “Then that means he’s got something going on he wants to make sure no one finds out about.”
You took a moment to process the implications. Kingpin had something big going down, not that he didn’t always, but now it was more personal. Now, it involved Bucky, which meant it involved you. 
“I’ll get this mess cleaned up,” Bucky sighed, running a hand through his short, dark hair, “Go back to your apartment.”
That was it? Not so much as a thank you?
You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest, “That’s one way to thank someone who just saved your ass.”
“You didn’t save anything,” Bucky gritted out, taking a step closer to you in that intimidating way you found he often liked to, “If you hadn’t come by, I still would have woken up and taken those guys easily.”
“Are you kidding me?” You exclaimed, gesturing around to the mess, “I had two of those guys out before you were even fully awake, Barnes! Just admit I helped you,”
He was so close to you that you could barely reach out and you would be touching his bare skin. The temptation was strong, stronger than you’d like to admit. It was like he was a magnet and you a compass, and for the life of you, even when you wanted nothing more than to run away from him, you couldn’t stop yourself from being led right back into him. 
“I said it before, and I’ll say it again,” Bucky muttered, his voice low and making your stomach take a sudden swirl. “I don’t need your help.”
His eyes darted down to your lips, and then lower before returning to your gaze. It was then that you became fully aware of your lack of pants. Your cheeks heated slightly and you felt your stomach go taut from his attention, but you clenched your jaw and held your place.
“Clearly, you do,” You echoed back to him, refusing to back down. After staring off at him for a few more moments, you let out a frustrated groan and stepped back, snapping the tension in the room as you shoved your way to the door. 
“Why do I even bother with you?” You gritted, stepping over a body, “I got up in the middle of the night and risked my life to help you and I don’t get so much as a-”
“Thanks,”
Bucky’s voice was so quiet that you almost missed it, but you had heard it. You froze in your tracks, your body going still except for your speeding heart as you slowly turned back around.
“What?” You whispered, unbelieving what he had just said. Bucky shot you a pointed glare, but let out a long sigh, some of the anger draining from his face. He looked tired, so incredibly tired.
“Thank you,” He repeated, the words cutting straight through your anger, “I know I can be difficult, it’s just…I’m not…”
He struggled with the words, his voice no longer flooded with frustration or annoyance. You spent a moment peering at the soldier, taking in the fact that he indeed had slept on the floor and noting the dog tags that hung around his throat. 
Bucky Barnes was haunted by his past. So haunted, you guessed, that he was shoving away everyone in his life to make sure nothing bad could happen again. You still were infuriated by him, but you couldn’t say that you hated him. 
In fact, you couldn’t begin to think if you ever really did. Or if maybe that hate was just a cover for the growing attraction you felt towards him, for the…
Ridiculous, you scolded yourself. 
“It’s okay,” You finally announced, your words softer than you intended them to be, “I get it.”
Somehow, you found yourself offering him a sad, soft smile that made the hard edges of his face soften. 
“You’re a lone wolf, I get that.” Your words made his jaw twitch, “And I’m not gonna tell you how to heal. You already know that answer. So, when the time comes that you’re ready to not do all this alone anymore, I’ll be right next door.”
Something changed deep within Bucky’s gaze, something that would have made you stay if you didn’t turn and walk towards the door. As you did, you felt the thumping of your heart. Your words had not just been an offer of help for this Kingpin situation. No, they had been more. An offer of help for anything, and you hadn’t realized you had meant them until they had come out.
Now you were left wondering for the rest of the night when exactly you had stopped hating Bucky Barnes.
And why you had the suspicion that you never hated him at all.
|||
As the dawn broke the next morning, so did your common sense. 
No matter how magnetizing Barnes was, you had to keep your distance unless your mission directly required you to get close. You didn’t know how deep your…not hatred…ran, but you weren’t willing to find out. It could compromise this mission, and most dangerous of all, it could compromise Bucky.
You had to keep your head in the game. So, the next week or so was packed with you spending the day actively avoiding Barnes in the same way you had purposely collided with him at first. During the nights, you poured over documents and case files concerning Kingpin. You tracked his movements, hunted down where his men crawled back to after their missions, watched his cover businesses with a close, keen eye.
Kingpin was an intimidating mobster and could rule his forces with an iron fist of fear, but he wasn’t necessarily the brightest businessman. He was good at covering his illegal tracks, but not great. That was why you were able to catch the whispers around the upcoming charity gala a local socialite was hosting. 
Word was, Kingpin and his men would be at the gala to finish working out a business deal with an associate. The same business deal, you suspected, that had him lashing out at not just Bucky, but several other known adversaries to his empire across the whole of New York. 
So if Kingpin would be there, so would you.
As you finished getting ready for the gala and stood in front of your mirror to make sure everything was perfect, your mind strayed to the super soldier next door. You hadn’t seen him in over a week, not since that night where you saved his life. Even now, his apartment was silent.
You let out a long sigh and adjusted the contours of your dress and felt for the weapons beneath it. The floor-length number was deceiving to anyone with a keen eye, exposing parts of you that would normally hide weapons. Your thigh on your dominant side was almost fully exposed with a slit, and your bodice provided no way to get to a weapon if it was stored there. 
You were a professional, though. Where you hid your weapons, no one would see until it was too late.
As you made your way out of your apartment, being sure to take the stairs this time, and then climbed into the ride you had waiting for you outside, your mind played through a million different ways this night could go. 
Best case would be you catching wind of whatever business had Kingpin so wound up with no altercations in the meantime. Worst case…well, let’s hope you didn’t have to use those weapons you so painstakingly hid.
After a drive that wasn’t long enough, you clambered out into the star-lit, diamond-encrusted evening. The event hall was elegant as you walked in, decked in lavender and silver and crawling with New York’s most elite. In a crowd like this, you knew it would not be hard to find a man as large as Kingpin. 
The longer you spent canvasing the gala, the more your worst case scenario started to play out in your head. As you had feared, Kingpin wasn’t here, not that you could see. Odds were, he sent someone in his place to do the negotiating. Now you had to find some way of finding that-
You gasped as your shoulder bumped right into a firm chest. You had been so busy scanning the room that you hadn’t been looking where you were walking. A warm, calloused hand gripped onto your elbow to keep you stable, and the way the touch made your brain fog should have been an indicator of who this man was. 
But you did not think of it until you glanced up, “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t…what are you doing here?”
As your gaze connected with Bucky Barnes, you saw the same flash of disbelief and then annoyance run through his crystal blue eyes.
“Are you serious, doll? You can’t even give me one night out without following me?” Bucky muttered lowly, his hand still around your elbow, holding you close. 
Your chest skipped at that word, that nickname he had called you, but you ignored it and glared right back up at the man, “You know, and this may come as a shock to you, but not everything in my life revolves around following you,”
Bucky scoffed, tilting his head at you. Suddenly, you were fighting to overcome how stunning he was in the all black suit that he wore. His alluring gaze seemed to draw you in again, and you knew you had to get away from him. 
“I wasn’t born yesterday, sweetheart.” Bucky assured, his tone like pure narcotics to your soul.
You let out a short laugh, “Trust me, I know.”
He shook his head, licking his bottom lip as he held your arm and started pulling you towards the exit, “It’s time for you to go.”
“Hey, you cannot just tell me what to do!” You muttered, pulling your arm from his grasp and coming to an abrupt halt. He gritted his jaw as he turned and looked down to you, but you beat him to the punch.
“If you’re here for the same reason as me, then Kingpin’s men are out here somewhere carrying out a business deal that could be huge. This could be our only chance to stop it.”
“Our?” Bucky repeated, and you stared at him indignantly.
“That’s what you caught from all of that?” You exclaimed, huffing out a breath, “Look, whatever is happening is big. If we don’t stop him, who will?”
“I said before, stay out of this. Go back to Langley and report your mission as a success, and leave me alone. These men are dangerous, don’t make this your fight.” Bucky’s words weren’t as angry as before, there was something in them, something almost desperate. 
You held his gaze, taking a step closer, “Trust me, sweetheart, I’ve dealt with plenty of dangerous men.”
“Oh yeah?” Bucky asked, almost taunting you as he cocked his head at you. 
Your heart was racing, your skin was on fire and he wasn’t even touching you. Maybe leaving was the best idea.
You caught something out of the side of your vision, and looked over towards the dance floor. There you saw one of Kingpin’s associates you’d been tracking all week step out onto the dance floor with a woman you’d never seen before. As he pulled her into a waltz, you knew immediately that this was a business dance, not pleasure. 
“There, 11 o’clock,” You whispered, turning your gaze back to Bucky as his gaze flitted towards the direction you gaze. He nodded once.
“That’s them,” He agreed.
“Come on,” You urged, grabbing his hand and tugging him towards the dance floor.
“Woah, woah, I don’t dance,” Bucky protested, but let you pull him nonetheless. You cracked a half-smile as you looked back at Bucky, and you noticed the way something in his gaze shifted at the sight of your smile.
“Well tonight you do.” 
As you pulled Bucky out into the slow dance alongside a few dozen other couples, you noticed the way his lips tipped up ever so slightly. The sight of that smile…it made your heart miss more than a few beats. 
As the two of you joined the fray, Bucky tugged you into him so swiftly that you let out a gasp. Expertly, he guided one hand to the small of your back and grabbed your hand with the other. In a matter of moments, the two of you were dancing, and you looked back up at the soldier in wonder.
“I thought you said you don’t dance,” You mused. Bucky smiled, then turned his gaze to you.
“I don’t, doesn’t mean I can’t,” He informed. 
In that moment, with your hand in his gloved metal one and him smiling down at you like that…it was enough to make you forget anything before this, before now, before him. The two of you danced, and for a moment both of you forgot why you’d joined the dance floor in the first place. Forgotten was business and missions and danger, the only thing left in the world was his hands on you as you danced. 
You could hardly breathe as he led you around the dance floor, and you certainly couldn’t take your eyes off of his. You weren’t smiling anymore, but neither was he. You didn’t smile because you knew. In that moment, held in his arms and dancing like the two of you had been practicing this step your entire life, like you had been made to dance together, you knew.
You knew that no matter what unfolded in the days and weeks to come, whatever became of this mission, Bucky Barnes had ruined you. For no longer could you dance with anyone else. Not when you knew this, knew him. 
He had ruined you in this moment, and for the first time in your life you understood why the Moon never left its orbit. The Moon was so enthralled with catching even a glimpse of the Sun that it was willing to bear the black of night if that’s what it took to bear the Sun’s rays.
Bucky Barnes had ruined you, and now you could never leave your orbit either. 
“Doll, I-”
Whatever Bucky was going to say died as the two of you suddenly found yourselves dancing right beside Kingpin’s associate. That was the snap to reality that you needed, and you forced out1 the outrageous thoughts that had been plaguing you. 
Thinking quickly, you pulled out of Bucky’s hold and stepped closer to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and resting your head on his shoulder. This position let you inconspicuously listen in to what it was that the associate was saying to his business partner, and Bucky quickly caught on as he brought his hands to your waist and held you close. 
You’d like to say that eavesdropping was the only reason you did this, but you’d be lying. Being held by him set your skin on fire, as if you’d been touched by lightning and survived. You needed this, you craved this, with his hands on your waist and his breath on your neck. But you had to focus right now, you had to hear what the associate was saying. 
You forced your brain to switch into operative mode, forcing yourself to focus only on the conversation beside you.
“-depending on how much your boss is willing to pay. Timeliness like that is going to be extra,” The woman spoke. 
“Money is not an issue, trust me,” The associate assured.
“Well then,” The woman responded, sounding pleased, “1.5 for the weapons and an extra 1 for the time bump. Do we have a deal?”
There was a pause, a consideration. Your heart sped up more than it was already racing. Weapons. An arms deal that Kingpin would no doubt use to spread onto the streets, to put a tighter noose around the neighborhoods he already kept under his thumb. And over two million dollars just for weapons? This was the biggest deal you’d seen up close. This could plunge New York into a deeper chaos than it already was.
“An even 2 and we have a deal,” The associate managed out, his tone taut.
“Then I will see you next week. And your boss had better be there, or the deal’s off,” The woman spoke with finality. And then there was silence, nothing but the waltz and the normal clamor of the gala.
Pulling back, you turned your gaze up to Bucky, whose gaze burned down on you with a certain clarity to his blue eyes. 
“Got it?” He mumbled. You nodded, your eyes wide with excitement. 
Smoothly, Bucky led you right off of the dance floor, offering his arm to you. You took it, making sure the two of you were walking in the direction opposite the associate. When you were mixed enough in the crowd, you spoke quietly, your tone flooded with vigor.
“Sometime next week, two million for an arms deal,” You informed. Bucky let out a sharp breath, his gaze forward just like yours as the two of you walked.
“A trade that big…”
“I know,” You whispered in response, your heart thundering. You stopped walking, pulling Bucky to look at you, “I could figure out a day, time, and place. Then, together we could crash their party with an army of SWAT and CIA hiding out nearby. We could keep two mill worth of weapons off the streets and put away Kingpin for a while.”
Bucky turned his gaze from you, his jaw clenched. You furrowed your brows up at the man, you were so sure he would be all over this mission. So why did he have that look in his eye? 
Without looking down at you, Bucky finally spoke, “Like I said, there’s no we. I’m taking you back to the apartment and that’s where you’re gonna stay until this is over.”
You flinched back, so struck by his sudden change in demeanor that a shot of pain went through your chest. How could he be so cold after what happened on that dance floor? You couldn’t have been the only one to feel that…
“I don’t understand,” You breathed, indignation rising in your chest, “Don’t you want to take out Kingpin?”
“I do,” Bucky responded, finally looking down to you with that cold, shut-off look in his gaze that you knew all too well, “But not with you. You’re going home.”
He let go of you and turned, walking towards the exit of the gala. Sputtering, you followed after him, storming behind him into the brisk night. 
“Are you kidding me?” You exclaimed as he gave the valet his ticket and they ran off to grab his car, “What happened to working together? This is my mission, Bucky and I’m not just going to give up on it.”
Bucky turned on you, his gaze boiling with something that wasn’t quiet anger, but felt a lot like it, “I don’t want your help. I don’t need your help. Stay out of this one.”
You could see the valet bringing up the car and you knew that once we were inside, he would shut down. This was your last chance. 
“Whether you want my help or not, you are getting it! It is my mission to keep you safe, Bucky and I’m not letting you do this alone.”
Bucky shook his head at you, muttering something about you being impossible as he caught his keys as the valet threw them to him. He sauntered up to the car, opening the door and gesturing for you to get in. Cheeks hot with anger, you stormed up and got in the car, adjusting your dress as he shut the door and walked around to the driver’s seat.
Just as you predicted, the ride back to the apartments was silent. 
You knew what he was doing. He thought this was too dangerous, and he didn’t want you involved. That night in his apartment, you had seen how guarded he was to keep people from getting close. That dance, that had pushed the line and now he was not going to let you get into this mission. Frustration boiled up within you, and halfway through the drive, you finally exploded.
“This is bullshit!” You suddenly exclaimed, and you caught the way Bucky’s hands tightened on the steering wheel.
“We’re not doing this,” He muttered.
“Like hell we aren’t,” You fired back, turning to look at him even if he kept his eyes on the road, “I know why you’re banning me from this mission and I get it, I do. But-”
“You don’t know anything,” Bucky cut in, his voice low and almost menacing. 
You laughed without humor, slowly losing your control, “You are impossible, impossible!”
Turning forward again, you raked your hands through your hair, “You are so difficult. One day you’re gonna need someone, and if you keep shoving people that care for you away, you’re gonna have no one!”
The car screeched to a sudden halt.
Your stomach dropped as you looked around the surprisingly quiet street, your heart thudding.
“What are you-”
“Get out.” Bucky gritted.
Your heart sank instantly. You looked over at him in astonishment, your eyes wide, “What?”
“Get. Out.” Bucky repeated, not even looking at you, “Walk home.”
“That’s like four miles from here, and I’m in heels!” You exclaimed. Bucky’s jaw tightened.
“You’re CIA, you’ll figure it out.”
Your heart slammed in your chest, and the words you had spit at him moments prior burned in your chest. You had crossed a line, and you knew it. You felt it, “Bucky, I’m sorry. I–”
“Get out of this car before I pull you out myself.” There was hurt in his eyes, and it made you want to die.
You had both said things to hurt the other, had both wounded each other. 
As you stepped out of the car and into the night air, you realized that people could only be hurt by someone who held at least a part of them. And as you shut your door and Bucky peeled away into the night, you felt a piece of you go with him. 
Swallowing thickly, you shook your head and pulled out your phone. You were already searching up a ride to take you to your apartment, but you walked as you did it. The cool night air was refreshing in a way, and you let out a long sigh, putting your phone down and looking around at the near-empty streets. 
What had gone so wrong?
And so, you decided against calling a ride. Instead, you turned into a nearby, warm-looking bar and sat, drinking away your sorrows and working up the courage to make the long, lonely walk home.
|||
You were within a half-mile of your apartment, and you still hadn’t sorted through the storm in your mind.
 All you knew was that this was more than a mission, and it had been for a long while. 
“I gave you one job, and you couldn’t even accomplish it. One simple job.”
Your feet stalled, your head suddenly going quiet. You knew that voice. And, as you took one step closer to the alley that it poured out of and peered inside, what you saw confirmed it.
Kingpin. 
In your muddled haze of a walk, you’d forgotten that one of Kingpin’s cover businesses was on the way back to your apartment. Now here you were, just around the corner of the mobster himself. Your eyes took in his massive frame hovering over a quivering man. A man that looked awfully familiar…
You managed to stifle your gasp as you recognized it as the man that gave Kingpin up to you and Bucky when he’d broken into Bucky’s apartment.
“I’m s-sorry boss, there was two of ‘em. I was lucky to make it out alive,” The man stammered. Kingpin hummed.
“You’re right, that is lucky,” He grabbed the man by his collar and hoisted him off of his feet, easily holding him in mid-air, “So tell me, what exactly did you give up to them to save yourself?”
“N-nothing boss! I would never give you or the operation up, never! I’m loyal,” The man pleaded.
You should go. You should hurry past and keep walking. But you just couldn’t, not when the man himself was standing right there and he might give up information on the arms deal you’d caught wind of. 
Kingpin set the man back onto his feet and smoothed out the man’s collar, “I believe you.”
The man nearly sobbed, “Thank you boss, thank you.”
“But just an insurance policy,” Kingpin said, then motioned with one hand into the darkness of the alley. Two burly guards stepped forward, armed to the teeth. 
“Kill him,” Kingpin spoke smoothly, then stepped back and held his hands together as the man begged and pleaded. Your heart thundered in your chest as the gunshot from one of the guards into the man rang through you, making you flinch slightly. 
When the job was done, Kingpin walked up to his guards, “Filch reported back from the gala. Said he got the deal moved up to next Saturday. Make sure the streets stay quiet. We can’t let it get out.”
“Sure thing, boss,” The guard nodded.
Next Saturday, that gave you eight days. A smile tugged onto your lips and you were just about to move past the alley when a set of burly, vile hands closed around your shoulders. 
“Well look what we’ve got here, a little birdie listening in.” The man purred, and your stomach sank to the floor. 
You had to get away, and you had to do it now. You thrashed against the man’s hold, slipping your hand towards where you’d hidden a small but lethal knife. Kingpin couldn’t know that you’d heard. He couldn’t know. Your hand was inches from the knife when another one of Kingpin’s men came around the corner and grabbed your wrists in a bruising grip, yanking them in front of you. 
“Hello there, pretty bird,” He greeted, and together the two men began to drag you into the alley. Sudden, blinding panic slammed into you and you knew instantly what you had to do. 
If you pulled a weapon and beat the shit out of these guys like you knew you could, Kingpin would know you’d heard him and were someone to be worried about. Your best chance at making it out of this not only alive, but with the deal still set for next Saturday, you had to play dumb. You had to be a regular citizen, an innocent bystander scared of getting mugged. 
And so you did.
You turned your anger into fear that wasn’t totally falsified, and you thrashed in the men’s grips.
“Please, let me go!” You begged, “You can take my money, my wallet, anything you want! Please!”
They’d gotten you into the alley by now, and darkness wrapped around you as Kingpin himself heard your cries. He paused, looking back at you and tilting his head curiously. Your pulse thundered so fast that you thought you’d faint. 
“What’s going on here?” Kingpin asked, slowly walking up to you, towering over you even when he was a few feet away.
“Caught this pretty lady walking by, looking like she wanted to come say hello,” One of the men presented.
The smell of the alley nearly made you gag, the fabric of your dress already soiled at the bottom from the puddles of unknown liquid. Real fear was pulsing through you, and you let it. You shoved down the instincts drilled into you from your time in the CIA and let yourself be a citizen, a bystander in the wrong place at the wrong time.
“Please, you can have my jewelry, my money, anything you want,” You insisted, your eyes filling with tears that weren’t entirely fake. 
“We’re not muggers,” Kingpin responded, his tone curious as he took you in, “What are you doing out here all alone, little bird?”
“My Uber canceled on me and I had to walk home from my party, please I don’t know what’s going on!” You trembled out. 
Kingpin studied you closely, then tilted his head and said to the men holding you, “Search her,”
Panic was constricting your chest, and you shivered as the men began patting you down. You had to clench your firsts to keep from breaking one of their noses when one stayed a little longer than necessary on your breasts. There was a small breath of relief when they both stood back, having found none of your hidden weapons.
“She’s clean.”
Kingpin cracked a half smile and reached forward. You flinched back as much as the men holding you would allow, but that wasn’t enough. He grabbed ahold of one of your fists, raising it up to inspect. He looked back up at you, his gaze amused.
“You’re angry,” Kingpin mused, a smile ticking onto his lips, “You’ve got more fight in you then you’re letting on.” “Well ladies with fight who are dragged into alleyways don’t usually last long, do they?” You managed out, your eyes daring to meet his. To your surprise, he laughed.
“Let her go, boys. We’ve terrified her enough.” 
You almost sobbed in relief when the men holding you let go. It worked. He was letting you go, he didn’t know. He didn’t-
That’s when you made your first and only mistake. You let your eyes travel the alley for a moment. But that moment, no matter how short, was enough. You saw the dead body of the man who had just been shot. 
And Kingpin knew it.
He glanced back towards the body, then slowly back to you. 
“Oh little bird, why’d you have to go and do that? I was really starting to like you,” He sighed.
Terror like you’d never known gripped you suddenly. Dread, real and cold pierced into your belly. You began to shake your head.
“No, no please I won’t tell anyone. I didn’t see anything. I didn’t-”
His massive hand gripped your jaw, cutting you off. You trembled terribly as he held your jaw and just peered at you, seeming to test you.
Finally, finally, he said, “I believe you.”
You sighed, but barely had a moment to breathe when he repeated those damned words from before, “But just as an insurance policy,”
He stepped back, letting you go and then gesturing to his men.
“Rough her up. Don’t kill her, just show her what’s gonna happen if she does decide to tell,” Kingpin stepped back into the dark alley, a smile starting on his lips, “Which I don’t think she will. Good night, little bird.”
“Wait,” You shook, glanced around at his goons who now surrounded you, “Wait, please,”
You had taken beatings before, you could do this. You could do this.
“Boss’s orders,” One shrugged, then crashed his fist into your jaw.
Then the onslaught began, and you let it happen. You let them beat you, let them kick you so hard you thought ribs cracked, let them bust your lip and bruise your cheek. You could have them all dead in moments, but you let it happen. You’d made it this far without blowing the mission to hell, you couldn’t give yourself away now. 
So you stayed there on the alley floor, and you took it.
|||
By the time you finally made it to your apartment and stumbled up the stairs, you could barely stand.
Your head was spinning as you struggled to get your keys into the door. By the time you finally did, you shouldered your way in and didn’t even bother closing the door. You could barely think, barely see, barely feel anything besides the pain.
You’d taken worse beatings, sure, but it didn’t make this one hurt any less. Your breathing was labored as each breath made shooting pain pierce through your rib cage. Your dress was ripped and bloody and covered in filth from the alley floor. All you could taste was blood from the lip one of the men had split, and you were sure that if anyone were to see you, you’d look more like a walking corpse than anything else.
You stumbled over to your kitchen bar, gripping onto the surface for stability as you dropped your phone and clutch onto it. Your legs trembled from the effort of standing, and you didn’t even bother to switch the light on considering that would require more walking. All you wanted was to gather your strength, make it to your bathroom, and get all of this blood off of you. 
Then you’d sleep for as long as your body would let you.
At least, that was the plan until there was a knock on your slightly open door. 
You didn’t even have the strength to speak as the person pushed open the door and walked a few steps into your dark, silent apartment.
“Y/N, I know I’m probably the last person you want to talk to right now, but…” Bucky paused, and the sound of his voice nearly made you sob. More than anything, more than even a bath or sleep, you wanted him to hold you. You were too tired to question the impulse.
Bucky sighed, and you could practically hear the indecision in his tone, “I turned around as soon as I forced you out, but I couldn’t find you. I’ve been pacing the entire night waiting for you to come back. I overreacted and…and I’m sorry.”
He’d gone back for you. He’d looked for you. 
Your heart burned, and tears you didn’t fight worsened your already blurry vision.
You wanted to turn and run to him, you wanted to hold him and tell him that it was alright, that you were sorry too. But you couldn’t. If you let go of this counter, you’d collapse, and you knew that if you hit this floor, you weren’t getting back up tonight. 
“You were just trying to help me, and I have such a hard time taking help and an even harder time letting people in and,” Bucky stopped with a sigh, cutting off his rant, “I’m stumbling through this, could you please just turn around and say something?”
If you weren’t on the brink of passing out, you’d laugh. 
Bucky let out a frustrated huff, “I’m apologizing here, are you even listening?”
You opened your mouth to speak, but blood came out instead and you let out a short cough. 
“Fine,” Bucky gritted, clearly trying to hold back his emotion, “I’ll just…leave you be.”
Panic disrupted your pain and you managed to brace your weight with one hand on the counter and turn towards where Bucky was already walking towards your door. He couldn’t leave. You needed him.
“Bucky,” You strangled out, your voice exhausted, “W-wait,”
Bucky froze, his gaze turning back to you with his brows furrowed. That’s when the light of the hallway broke upon you, and his eyes widened in horror as he saw the blood and dirt and bruises. 
You heard him say your name like a vow, but then the world began to spin and you were collapsing. 
You barely felt the thud of the floor as you slammed against it, your body bloody and broken and giving up for the night. You heard the pounding of footsteps, felt the floor tremble as Bucky slid to his knees beside you. His hands were so gentle, so heart-breakingly gentle, as he lightly touched your bruised cheek. You watched through a blurred gaze as he kneeled over you, his jaw tight and his eyes wild. 
“You’re okay, doll, I got you. I got you,” Bucky promised, ever so tenderly pulling your broken body into his lap. He cradled your head with his hand, his eyes sweeping over you to take in the extent of your injuries.
“Shit,” He swore, shaking his head, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,”
“Not your fault,” You managed, a tear slipping down your cheek.
Bucky shook his head, his jaw clenched so tight that you saw his muscles ticking. His breaths were shallow as he caressed a finger down your cheek before gathering you in his arms as gently as he could. You groaned in pain as he stood, holding you close to himself with ease. But even despite the pain, he was holding you, and that was something you never thought you’d feel again.
“I know baby, I know,” He whispered, his words soothing you through the pain. He carried you out of your apartment, careful to close the door before carrying you into his place. You felt your consciousness slipping now that you were safe. You actually had never felt safer than when you were here, in his arms. 
Bucky set you down on his counter, the cool material taking the edge off of the aching of your body. Before he could clean you up or bandage anything, Bucky stood close to you, his hand staying on your cheek. You leaned into it, knowing you wouldn’t have if you weren’t half-asleep right now.
“Doll, I need you to look at me,” Bucky urged, a cold, ferocious tone to his voice that you didn’t think was for you. You managed to pry your eyes open and clash your gaze with his. In it was a cold fury, “Who did this to you?”
“Kingpin’s men,” You mumbled, and Bucky stiffened, “I caught…word of the deal, but he…he saw me. Only way to…to not blow it was to…to-”
“Play the bystander,” Bucky finished for you, and you nodded. Bucky shook his head, “You stupid, brave girl.”
You managed a smile, but the movement pulled at the split in your lip and made you wince. 
“You can sleep now, doll. I’ve got you,” Bucky whispered. You nodded, letting your eyes flutter closed. You felt his hand caress your cheek, his fingers lingering on your skin.
Then, in the near dark of sleep, Bucky let out a defeated sigh.
“Oh darling,” He sighed, then there was a press of a kiss to your brow and whispered words against your skin, “How the hell am I supposed to let you go when this is all over?”
|||
“Bucky?”
Your voice rang through Bucky’s apartment, amusement heavy in your tone. He hummed in response, his back to you as he slaved away at his small stove.
Before you already sat a fresh coffee, eggs, toast, and fruit. You couldn’t help but smile. The movement pulled at your healing lip, but it didn’t hurt anymore.
“It’s been two days. You don’t have to keep apologizing,” You called out. Bucky turned around to you, holding a pan in one hand.
“I’m just making breakfast,” He tried, but you just raised an eyebrow at him. With a sigh, Bucky set down the pan, and walked over to the counter, settling his hands down on the other side of where you sat.
“Y/N, you didn’t see what I did that night,” Bucky mumbled, not meeting your gaze, “If you could have seen how you looked, all that blood…”
Your heart strung in your chest. You slept nearly an entire day after the incident, and then spent the next day being fussed over by Bucky. You had a few bruised ribs and some nasty shiners, but nothing serious luckily. In all that time, the two of you had avoided the subject of that night besides the both of you apologizing to the other profusely.
“Buck, listen to me,” You whispered, his pained gaze finally rising to yours, “That was a heated night, we both did and said things we didn’t mean. We apologized for that, it’s behind us. But what happened to me in that alley,”
You paused hesitating only a moment before you threw caution to the wind and reached across the counter, grabbing his hand. His metal hand. His eyes widened a fraction and something changed in his gaze, something that made your heart miss a step.
“What happened to me in that alley was not your fault. That one was all me,” You insisted. Bucky squeezed your hand, the cool metal soothing your skin.
“But if I had just kept you in the car, if I hadn’t overreacted like that-”
“Then we wouldn’t know when the deal was going down,” You reasoned, “And if I were you, I would have kicked me out of the car too.”
Bucky let out a low laugh, shaking his head. His thumb ran across your skin absentmindedly, making your mind muddle, “Fine.”
You raised your eyebrows, a smile dancing on your lips “So does that mean we can move on? Not that I mind you making me breakfast.”
“Don’t push your luck, doll,” Bucky warned, a smile tugging at his lips. Letting go of your hand, he walked around the counter and into his living room, walking over to his coffee table where two files sat. You swiveled around on the barstool, watching him curiously.
As if he felt your gaze, Bucky spoke again, “While you were getting your beauty sleep in, I found where the arms deal is going down. So, if we’re gonna crash that party, we better start planning.”
A thrill went through you, and you sat up straighter. You watched as he turned and walked back to you with the files in his hand. Sure enough, he handed you one of them. You opened the front, seeing the page filled with information on Kingpin, his empire, and the arms deal. You looked up at Bucky with wide, bright eyes.
“We?” You taunted. Bucky rolled his eyes, grabbing the front of your file.
“I can still take this back,” He warned. You smiled, pulling it back towards you and out of his grasp. His grumpy demeanor didn’t scare you, nor did it frustrate you like it did before. 
“Too late,” You said sweetly, looking up at him as he stood before your seated frame. He shook his head at you, a half smile he tried to hide on his lips as he stepped back. 
“Alright CIA,” Bucky announced, flipping open his file, “Show me what you got.”
|||
It was Saturday night, and the air was thick with anticipation. 
You and Bucky sat in his car, staking out the trainyard where the arms deal was set to be going down. The walkie set before you crackled to life.
“How’s it looking?” Sam Wilson asked. You smiled at the sound of his voice, happy to have him here. Once you briefed him on what was happening, he just had to have a piece of it.
“Nothing so far,” You replied, your eyes sweeping across the darkened yard packed with parked trains, “We’ve still got some time, though.”
“I have RedWing watching from the skies, so I’ll keep you posted,” Sam informed.
“I hate that damn thing,” Bucky grumbled. You pressed your lips together to keep from laughing.
“What was that?” Sam asked. 
“Nothing,” You answered, putting your hand over Bucky’s mouth just as he’s about to repeat his statement, “Tell RedWing we said thank you!”
As soon as the radio went quiet, Bucky pulled off your hand, staring at you in indignation. 
“You are getting too comfortable with me,” He gritted. You shrugged, trying not to look too smug.
“Someone’s gotta keep you in line,” You quipped. Bucky was grumbling under his breath about something, and you were just about to ask him about it when something caught your eye in the distance. You sat up, pointing towards the left side of the yard.
“There,” You announced, your tone serious, “You see it?”
Bucky leaned forward, following the direction you were pointing. He nodded, reaching forward and grabbing the walkie.
“Sam, two SUVs rolling in. You got ‘em?” 
“I see them,” Sam responded, his voice all business, “Looks like it's the dealers. The weapons are probably stashed in one of the train cars somewhere. I’ll run a scan, you guys get out there.”
“Will do, comms going in,” Bucky replied.
The two of you slipped the comm links into your ears, checking your respective guns before exiting the car. You both jogged towards the first train car parked in the massive yard, getting cover as fast as possible.
“Be advised, the dealers have associates fanning out through the trainyard.” Sam’s voice crackled through the comm.
“Copy,” You spoke softly, your back pressed against the train, “We’ll take care of it.”
Looking over to Bucky, you nodded once at him before he led the way, gun raised as he cleared the corner. The two of you worked systematically through the yard. Sweeping out slowly in search of the associates. This place was a maze, making it ideal for deals like this. If you wanted a chance at taking the op down, you had to get these guards out.
You and Bucky paused at a break in the train, and this time you led as you inched forward and checked the corner. Seeing a guard standing watch at the corner, you pulled back and looked at Bucky. Without even having to say a word, you and Bucky worked together as if you’d been doing it for years. 
You crouched down, holstering your gun and slipping out a knife. You took a beat to breathe before you slid forward, around the corner. The noise made the guard swivel her head, but she made the mistake of not looking down. With the deadly sharp knife, you made it to her feet before she noticed you.
Then, you whistled. A quiet, simple tone. With furrowed brows, she looked down to see you, crouched by her feet with a knife. Her brows rose and she opened her mouth to alert someone, but Bucky was on her, his hand around her mouth. That’s when you struck, slicing the tendon at the back of her heel. 
Bucky’s hand muffled her scream as she dropped, and you stood in response, landing a killer blow across her temple and knocking her out. When the scuffle was over, the trainyard was silent. With a breathless smile, you looked up to Bucky.
“We make a pretty good team,” You whispered. He shot you a pointed look.
“I don’t do teams.”
You followed him as walked past the downed guard, a smirk tugging at your lips, “That’s right. You’re a lone wolf.”
Bucky stopped in his gait, nearly making you run into him. He turned and shot a glare at you, one that let you know you were getting under his skin. You held your hands up, showing him you were backing off the subject. He shook his head at you and kept walking. 
“You do make a good team,” Sam intervened, making you smile triumphantly.
“Sam, I swear-” Bucky began, but you darted up, covering his mouth with your hand to silence him. He saw the guard rounding the corner a second after you did. Luckily, the guard hadn’t seen you.
Not yet, at least.
Thinking quickly, Bucky grabbed you by the waist and hoisted you up into the opening of a nearby, darkened train car. You landed inside silently and turned, waiting for Bucky who jumped in a second later. Swiveling his gaze around, he noticed the same problem you did. 
The car was full of weapons. The weapons.
Not only did this endanger the both of you should the deal start soon, it also left little room for you to hide. Bucky solved that issue swiftly as he turned and urged you against a stack of explosives, his body pressed against yours instantly, caging you into the darkness and making sure the two of you were invisible.
Or, you realized with a start, making sure you were invisible. 
You could see just far enough to look up and see Bucky peering down at you. His body was against yours, and his face was so near to yours that you could move half an inch and your lips would be touching. His pine and whiskey scent washed over you, intoxicating you, making you forget for a moment where you were. 
Bucky seemed to do the same as his hand moved from beside your hand and he swept a thumb against your cheek. Lightning scattered across your skin where he touched, and you nearly forgot how to breathe. 
You wanted to kiss him. You needed to kiss him. 
Bucky’s eyes were darting between your lips and gaze, and your heart thundered in your chest. You were sure he could feel it with your bodies pressed so tightly together, and the uptick of the edge of his lips told you he did. Your lips itched in anticipation, burning even as they were kept apart from his. 
Bucky’s hand moved from your cheek down to rest against your throat, just as it did that day in your kitchen all those months ago. You knew that he did it to get a better feel of your pulse, and your cheeks heated in response. His lips were nearly touching yours and his hand was on your neck and you thought you might faint.
He was totally in control of you, and he knew it.
With a half-smirk that made your knees nearly buckle he whispered, “Do I always make you this nervous?”
You wanted to banter back, to shoot a petty insult at him, but you couldn’t think of anything but his lips on yours. You wanted it so badly, and you could tell Bucky did too because the hand that wasn’t on your throat was clenched tightly, as if he was restraining himself. You nudged your chin up a fraction, stopping just short of his lips, leaving the decision up to him. Bucky moved, and when his lips were almost touching yours-
“I found the weapons,” Sam’s voice poured out of RedWing, who sat hovering right in front of you and Bucky. 
You and Bucky jolted apart, the coast clear from the guard and the both of you coughing or clearing your throat.
“What?” Sam asked, his tone taunting, “Did I interrupt something?”
“Sam, if RedWing doesn’t fly away I’m gonna break it,” Bucky threatened lowly. 
“What, are you mad that he’s c-”
Bucky lunged for RedWing, who turned and flew away just in time. You couldn’t help but smile, struggling to hold in your laughter as Bucky turned and shook his head, clearly wound up. When he saw the look on his face he pointed a finger in your direction.
“Not a word,” He commanded. 
“Yes sir,” You teased, shoving his shoulder lightly as you passed him to inspect the weapons. What you missed as you peered into the weapons crates was the way Bucky smiled at you as you passed, a real smile unlike any of the one’s he’d given since the 40’s.
“Look at all this,” You breathed, inspecting box after box of weapons of all sorts. 
“And there’s at least six more cars just like it,” Sam informed over the comm. You shook your head, picking up a rather nasty looking bomb. 
“We better get a move on, Kingpin’s bound to be here at any moment.” Your words caught Bucky’s attention and he nodded, walking towards the opening of the train car and hopping out. Wordlessly, you followed. As you jumped out of the car, Bucky grabbed you by the hips and slowed down your descent, setting you safely on the ground. His hands burned on your waist, and that tension from before returned in full force.
“I had that, you know,” You informed, raising a brow at him. He just smirked.
“I know.”
Then let you go and walk away, finally letting you take in a breath. As you followed him, you shook your head. 
This was going to be a long night.
|||
It took twenty more minutes for you and Bucky to clear out the guards without any of them reporting back a disturbance.
And, right on time, Kingpin and his men showed up
You watched as the massive, hulking man sauntered up to the center of the trainyard where the dealers, led by the woman from the gala, stood waiting. You stood pressed against a train nearby with Bucky against the one across from you. Overhead, Sam was waiting for your signal to move in. 
It would be your job to make sure the SWAT team rolling up outside had enough time to infiltrate and secure the weapons that they could. In the meantime, you, Bucky, and Sam would ambush the deal, taking out as many operatives as you could and securing Kingpin and the Dealer. 
But right now, your mind wasn’t on the plan. No, you were stuck staring at the goons who waltzed up with Kingpin. You recognized three of them as the men who pummeled you that night after the gala. Noticing your clenched jaw, Bucky followed your gaze to the men. Understanding broke over him and you glanced over to see a certain fury flood his gaze. He looked back to you, his gaze clashing with yours.
“Which ones?” Was all he whispered, low enough so he couldn’t be heard by anyone except for the comm link. You heard the edge in his voice, and maybe it was wrong, but you loved it.
“The two on his right and second to the left.”
Bucky nodded, staring down the three men. He looked back to you, “You want them?”
A smile ghosted your lips. You could see the restraint in the way his shoulders were held tensely and the whitening of his knuckles on his gun. He wanted them, but he wanted you to have the choice first.
And you fell in love, right there. It began with the dance, but it was done now. There was no going back.
“Share?” You offered, and Bucky’s lips tipped up in a smile.
The two of you turned your attention back to the deal, straining enough to hear the conversation flowing from Kingpin and the Dealer who met in the middle.
“I’m not seeing my weapons,” Kingpin noted, his hands clasped before him. The woman smiled.
“The money first. Then you’ll get your weapons.”
Your hands tightened around your gun, waiting for Kingpin’s next move. He surveyed the Dealer before nodding, turning back to his man and motioning. That was it, this was your chance. 
“Now,” You whispered, and instantly the sound of bullets from somewhere to the right blasted through the air.
Sam’s distraction.
The Dealer and Kingpin snapped their gazes towards the sound. 
“What the hell-”
That’s when you and Bucky swept in, guns raised and bullets flying before the group knew what was happening. Chaos broke out, but every time someone strayed from the center to flee into the trains, Sam was there to guide them back. 
The scene was a flurry of bullets and knives, of yelling and screams, but in the end it was you and Bucky who were left standing amongst the group of downed guards. Of course, there were a few left standing besides Kingpin and the Dealer, one of which happened to be one of the men who beat the shit out of you after the gala.
You did not miss how one of the other men who’d beat you wasn’t just unconscious nearby, but his neck was twisted at a wrong angle with Bucky standing nearby. The last of three was lying somewhere in the mess, shot and bleeding out. 
Silence settled over the scene as Sam slammed down on the top of one of the train cars, gun raised. Bucky stood by the Dealer, and you by Kingpin. The two criminals stood silently, their hands raised in submission. 
“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” You announced, keeping your gun pointed at Kingpin. He snapped his gaze to you, and surprise flickered through it followed by a sort of…admiration that made your skin crawl, “A SWAT team is closing in on the weapons now, so the two of you are going to call off anyone else you have stationed and come with us, without a fight preferably.”
“Little bird,” Kingpin greeted, making your pulse spike. You didn’t want to look at him, but you did anyway, and you hated the way you shook as you did, “It’s not often I’m surprised, but I gotta say, you’ve got me speechless here.”
You gritted your teeth, but it was Bucky who called out “Clearly not speechless enough,”
Kingpin laughed, seeming almost at ease. He started to lower his hands and you took a step closer, your gun held strong before you.
“Keep your hands where I can see them!” You ordered. 
“Okay, okay,” Kingpin complied, raising his hands up, “But I just want to say, you really shoulda thought this out more.”
You furrowed your brows, “Wh-”
You couldn’t even get the words out when three of the nearby train car doors slid open, and guards poured out. Your heart shot into your throat, and you didn’t even have the chance to shoot when twenty guns were pointed at you and twenty more at Bucky. You shot a nervous glance towards Bucky, who shared the same look. 
“Sam, go,” You whispered, and he flew off without another word. He needed to get the SWAT team in here now, or you and Bucky wouldn’t make it long. On the bidding of Kingpin’s army, you and Bucky set your guns down slowly. 
“Alright,” Kingpin announced, sighing as if this were just another Saturday night, “Now here’s what’s really gonna happen.���
He walked up to you, and off to the side you saw Bucky immediately lunge forward towards him. He couldn’t make it far before Kingpin pulled out a gun of his own and pointed it at your head.
Bucky froze.
“Leave her alone,” Bucky ordered, his voice dark and menacing. 
“Now it’s getting fun,” Kingpin mused, ignoring Bucky completely and stepping closer to you. You clenched your fists to hide the way they shook. 
“You’re gonna hop up to this train car here and get my weapons out, make sure they’re what I wanted. Then, you’re gonna call off the SWAT team, and we’re gonna walk out of here,” Kingpin said simply. 
“Not happening,” You gritted out.
“Funny, I don’t remember giving you a choice,” Kingpin sighed before grabbing your arm and looking to the dealer, “Which one has the weapons?”
She smirked, pointed at the train car nearby Bucky. It was torture to be dragged past him and not be able to touch him. Not for lack of trying, either. As you went by, he made a break for you, shouting your name. It took eight men to restrain him.
Eight men, that’s how many it took to hold him steady. 
And, you figured he was holding back since there was a gun to your head. 
“Oh, and package the soldier up. I want to have a few…words with him later.” Kingpin ordered, and panic blinded you. You reared back helplessly, struggling against his iron grip as you had to watch the men try to subdue Bucky and get him into handcuffs. 
Your panicked gaze met his, and all you could do was pray Sam was close with the SWAT team. You couldn’t rely on that, though. Kingpin was going to kill you and then Bucky.
You could die, so long as Bucky didn’t.
A plan began to spin in your head as Kingpin shoved you up into the train car. 
“Now, grab a gun from in there and show it to me,” Kingpin ordered, but then gave you a knowing smile, “And don’t try anything, or I’ll have a bullet in your boyfriend’s head.”
“On our way!” Sam called through the comm, but you were running out of time. The men were already hauling away Bucky, and you had to act fast. 
Turning into the dark train car full of weapons, you tried to lift a box and pretended to fail. Turning to look down at Kingpin, who still stood on the ground, you gritted, “I can’t get it. It’s too heavy.”
Maybe it was his built-in trust of you from your encounter that night after the gala, or maybe it was because he thought you were under too much emotional duress, but he believed you.
He bought it, and he hauled himself into the train car for everyone to see.
“You better not be-”
Before he could speak again or anyone could react, you’d pulled the bomb you picked earlier off of your belt and pulled the pick. Gasps and shouts rang out through the yard as you held the live explosive in your hand and made sure you stood between Kingpin and the exit of the train car.
“Y/N NO!” Bucky shouted, his voice cracking. With a bare pull of his arms, the cuffs on his wrists snapped and he made a move for you. 
A handful of guns were pressed into Bucky’s head, stopping him cold. In response, you held the motion-induced explosive tighter and pushed it further towards Kingpin, who had backed as far as he could against a stack of crates. Terror was clear across his face, which brought a sick sort of delight.
“You shoot him, and I drop it,” You announced, and once again the yard plunged into silence. 
Anyone who could see the situation knew you had the upper hand. If anyone killed you, the bomb would hit the ground and kill Kingpin. If Kingpin tried anything on you, you’d drop the bomb and kill the both of you. You were locked in a stalemate, and now you were going to win.
“Now, put your guns down.” Your voice rang through the trainyard, but no one acted. You lifted your brows and nodded, turning your head towards Kingpin. Panic flared in his eyes and he shouted, “GUNS DOWN! Put your damn guns down!”
You turned your head and watched as everyone did as they were told. Your eyes snagged on Bucky, who had a desperate look on his face. He shook his head, but you ignored his silent pleas. 
“You, the Dealer and all your forces are going to stand down. You’re going to wait patiently for SWAT to get here,” You lifted your chin, “Or I’ll drop this and we both go.”
“You wouldn’t,” Kingpin stuttered. 
“You really want to call my bluff? Go ahead, end your criminal empire in one moment of stupidity,” You dared. 
Kingpin took a moment to survey your gaze before he shook his head, “You’re crazy.”
You didn’t miss a beat.
“The things you do for love.”
That’s when you heard the rustling of gear and looked over to see the SWAT team storming in, guns raised and shouting at the Dealer and all of the assorted criminals throughout the yard. Taking in a trembling breath, you looked back at Kingpin.
“Game over, little bird,” You lifted your chin, and Kingpin’s eyes flared.
“This isn’t over,” He assured.
“Sure it isn’t,” You replied easily. Well, as easily as you could with a live bomb in your grasp.
You heard the clanging of the train car and looked over to see Bucky inside, his eyes deadly and his jaw clenched tightly as he grabbed Kingpin.
“Out,” Bucky growled, throwing him to the ground outside. Officers were on him instantly, but Bucky wasn’t paying attention, instead, he was on you. 
“Bucky, stay-” You warned with a trembling voice, stepping back to keep the bomb from him. Bucky wasn’t listening to you, though, He cut you off and cupped your cheeks.
“What the hell were you thinking? You could have died!” Bucky nearly shouted, but you didn’t miss the way his voice shook. 
“He was going to take you, and I couldn’t let him do that,” You whispered, tears gathering in your eyes. 
“So you pulled a bomb on him?” Bucky pushed. A tear slipped down your cheek and Bucky wiped it away, shaking his head at you, “Don’t ever do that again, don’t ever risk your life like that for me again.”
“No promises.” Your voice was trembling badly, and your hand was clenched so tightly around the bomb that your fingers hurt, “Bucky, I’m scared.”
You heard Sam call for a bomb squad in the distance, but you didn’t tear your gaze from Bucky. He pressed his forehead to yours, “I know, baby. But you’re gonna be alright.”
“What if I drop it?” You whispered, only allowing your fear to be heard and seen from Bucky. 
“You’re not gonna drop it,” Bucky assured, reaching forward and holding the explosive over your hand.
Buck, don’t-”
He held fast, closing both of his hands around yours and the bomb, “You’re gonna be okay. I’ve got you.”
“Sam, how long on that bomb squad?” You called out, another rogue tear burning down your cheek.
“They should be here any minute.” Sam’s reply made the tension in your chest ease slightly, and as if on command, the bomb squad came running up to the train car.
Bucky’s hands were solid around yours, and his gaze was unflinching and unafraid. He had you. That thought made your heart rate slow. He had you, he had you.
“So what do you have here?” A lady asked, jogging up and hopping into the train car, looking down at the explosive. She hummed, nodding before reaching into her kit. You looked down to watch her work, new fear ripping through you.
“No, just look at me,” Bucky ordered, making your gaze snap up to his. You nodded, doing your best to hold his gaze as the woman worked on the bomb. 
“You’ve got pretty eyes,” You murmured, the fear making your inhibitions lowered, “I don’t think I ever told you that.”
Bucky’s lips edged up into a smile, “Well, I figured you thought so considering how fast your heart was beating in that train car a few minutes ago. Or were you thinking about something other than my eyes?”
His charm worked perfectly, and you couldn’t help but laugh.
“Look at us,” You mused, glancing down at the bomb for a moment before looking back up to Bucky, “A few months ago you wanted to kill me, and now we’re holding a bomb I pulled to save your ass, again.”
“No, I still want to kill you sometimes,” Bucky amended, but the words held no merit. 
“Alright,” The bomb squad lady said, grabbing onto the underside of the bomb, “You can let it go now. I’ve got it.”
Your smile faded and you locked your gaze with Bucky’s again. He pulled one of his hands off and your grip on the explosive tightened. You shook your head slightly.
“It’s okay,” He murmured, nodding to you, “Let it go.”
Bucky slid his hand that was left on the bomb to yours, intertwining your fingers and slowly pulling your hand off. Before you knew it, Bucky had managed to pull your hand off the grenade. In its stead, Bucky held your hand tightly, pulling you instantly into his chest. 
You let out a shuddering sigh of relief, leaning your head on Bucky’s shoulder. Slowly he pulled back, keeping your hand in his, “Come on, let’s go.”
You nodded, your fear ebbing as the two of you jumped down from the train car. In an instant, Sam was at the two of you, nearly knocking you over with a hug. You laughed, letting go of Bucky’s hand and hugging Sam back. 
“You are insane!” Sam exclaimed, letting go of you and shaking his head, “Absolutely insane.”
You smiled, “Thanks,”
Sam laughed, shaking his head as he walked over to Bucky, “So not a compliment.”
After he checked in with Bucky he turned and faced the two of you. 
“Good work, guys. Glad to see you’re not killing each other here.” 
“Yet,” You and Bucky happened to say at the same time. 
Sam smiled, “I better be off, I’ve got a mission I left to help out here.” Pausing, he looked over to you and gestured to Bucky, “Take care of him?”
You smiled, nodding, “Always.”
The two of you said your goodbyes as Sam turned and flew off. With a long sigh, you turned and began to make your way back to Bucky’s car.
“Well, I don’t know about you, but I could go for some food right now.” You announced. 
“Wait,” Bucky stopped you, grabbing your arm and pulling you around to face him, “What you said back there to Kingpin…did you mean it?”
For a moment, you considered playing dumb and asking what he meant. But you knew what he meant, and he knew you did. You had inadvertently said that you loved him, and because of the bomb situation you almost thought you’d make it out without having to confront it.
You held Bucky’s gaze that was searing into you, and suddenly you were overcome with that same sensation to kiss him as before. With him standing this close to you and after what you’d just been through together, it took all of your strength to hold back. The tension in the air between the two of you as he waited for your response was maddening.
“Well, I did nearly blow myself up for you so take that as you-”
“You are infuriating,” Bucky huffed, tugging you closer so that your body was flush against his. Your joking ended immediately, your pulse flickering wildly as his lips danced just out of reach of yours. His blue eyes were dark as he stared down at you, each of you daring the other to make the first move.
Your lips brushed against his as you spoke into the silence, “I meant it.”
And then his lips were on yours. His arm was around your waist, pulling you tight as his other tangled into your hair. This kiss had been brewing for months, and you could feel it. Lightning danced across your skin as he kissed you desperately, in a way that made your arms tighten around his neck to keep yourself from falling. He nipped at your bottom lip softly, then pulled away and moved to hold your face in his hands. 
For a long while, Bucky just stared at you with a soft smile playing on his lips. You smiled, still dazed from the kiss. 
“What?” You asked. 
He ran a thumb across your cheek tenderly, “I was just trying to think back to when things changed between us. But…but I think I’ve loved you from the moment I met you.”
Your smile widened and you surged forward, kissing him again. Pulling back, you gazed up at him with an amused glint in your eyes.
“And when you were choking me in my kitchen, threatening to kill me, that was you showing your love for me?” You asked.
Bucky’s grin turned suave and playful as he threw his arm across your shoulders and walked with you towards his car, “Well, you seemed to like it enough in that train car.”
Your cheeks heated and you scoffed, slapping his muscled chest as the two of you walked. 
“Jerk,” You laughed out, and he held you closer to him with a smile.
“I love you too.”
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eat-limes-bitches · 10 months
Text
I Will Always Come When You Call
PAIRING: Female Reader x FATWS Bucky Barnes
SUMMARY:  When reader accidentally calls Bucky, he comes running to find out what’s wrong.
WARNINGS: ANGST, mentions of depression, fluff
Word Count: 1168
A/N: I disappeared from posting because, well, I had no will to write, I was in a rut. This is purely self soothing at this point because this is what I need right now. I promise that I have updates for the series soon, I just needed this first. 
Enjoy!! <3
Dividers by Rookthorne
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It was the same feeling, day in, day out, the constant numbing sadness for a loss that never happened. The monsters that emerged from the deepest parts of her mind and wrapped her consciousness in toxic thoughts. People always said the same things, “Get some air, it won’t do you any good being cooped up.” “Take a break, you’re just burnt out from working too hard.” That was her problem, she wasn’t working. She couldn’t. It's hard to do anything when you barely have the will to get out of bed, let alone work. She stared at the glowing numbers from the clock on her nightstand, indicating she was, once again, still awake at an unreasonable hour. She glanced at the dark screen of her phone that was resting on the bed next to her. Why was it there again? Oh, right. She was gonna call him. The corner of her lips twitched upwards at the thought. Bucky had always been there, they had been there for each other. After everything that they went through together, with Thanos, the Flag Smashers, his amends, they were together through it all and now that everything had calmed down, she was struggling to stay afloat. Unlocking her phone, her thumb hovered over the call button. What was she gonna say? “Hey Buck, I know it's 2:30 in the morning and nothing is wrong but I need you.” She shook her head. It was stupid, if either of them were to call the other at this time it should be him. She had no reason and no explanation as to why she was feeling this way. 
Letting out a groan she leaned back and thumped her head against the headboard closing her eyes as she sunk a little deeper into her mind. “Doll? Are you ok?” Her eyes snapped open and down to her phone. Shit, she accidentally hit the dial. “Y/N are you ok? You’re worrying me sweets.” She shook her head slightly, “Yeah, sorry Buck.” She quickly hung up, cutting off whatever it was that Bucky was about to say, and throwing her phone to the other side of the bed. She hated feeling like this, this hopelessness that seemed to seep in through every pore on her skin and settle deep within her bones, like how a chill sets in after getting caught in the pouring rain. She was so deep within her mind that she didn’t notice the man that entered her flat. She didn’t hear him calling out to her and asking her where she was. Eventually the door to her bedroom opened, causing her to snap out of her trance in alarm, only to relax again when she saw Bucky standing there with a worried look on his face. 
“God, there you are. You scared me to death, sweets.” He murmured as he crossed the room to sit next to her on the bed. She stared at him with a puzzled expression on her face, tracing her eyes across his features. His hair was messy, shoes missing, probably at the front door, dressed in a pair of sweats and a dark blue t-shirt that highlighted to worried look in his eyes. She continued to stare for a moment before she finally spoke, “You came..” Bucky blinked, confusion coloring his features as he replied, “Of course I did, you called.” She froze at his words, surprise seeping into her eyes as she looked at him, trying to decide if he was serious when he broke the silence, “What’s going on, darling?” She shook her head, looking away from him, “I- I honestly don’t know, and that’s the problem.” She melted as he placed an arm around her, pulled her into his side, a gentle sign for her to continue. “It’s just- god I’m not okay.” She leaned to rest her head against his shoulder as she struggled to find the words, “I.. I’m just not myself. My jaw hurts from grinding my teeth, I can’t sleep at night, not because I’m not tired, no, I’m exhausted. It’s like I’m too tired to sleep. Everything is too much and not enough at the same time. I’m spiraling, and I couldn’t even begin to tell you why.” Once she finished, Bucky let out a sigh and pulled her further into his embrace, as if holding her would shield her mind from the toxic thoughts that tried to take her from him. “Doll, you should have told me sooner.” He scolded softly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. She shrugged, “I didn’t want to worry or bother you. You’ve come so far in your own healing that I didn’t want to drag you down with me.”
 Bucky shook his head, “Y/N, look at me.” He placed hid flesh hand under her chin to raise her gaze so that she was looking at him, “You mean the whole fucking world to me, do you know that?” She tried to look away as color flooded her cheeks but he wasn’t having it, “I think of you every day. You’re my first thought when I wake up and the last one before I try to go to sleep. I want to help you, and before you even start with the whole, ‘you don’t have to help me’ bullshit, I want to help you.” He paused, moving the hand under her chin to thread his fingers through her hair as he looked over her weary face. “You don’t have to do this all on your own, my love, let me help.” 
His words were a soft gentle caress against the opened wounds on her soul, something she didn’t realize she needed until she had a taste of it, and with the sugary sweet words filling the holes, the negative began to suffocate, trying desperately to escape but when entrapped in his honey coated words, they just died out. She nodded her head before she spoke, “Ok…ok.” “What do you need darling, not tomorrow, not in an hour, right now, what do you need?” Bucky asked. She traced the intricate lines on his vibranium hand that was situated around her middle before she spoke, “Can you just, hold me? Just for a little bit? I haven’t been able to sleep well for three day a-” Bucky cut her off by pulling her to lie down with him, tucking her head into his chest before reaching over and turning off the lamp on the nightstand. He wrapped his arms back around her and pressed kisses along her hairline until he reached her ear where he whispered, “Get some sleep sweets. I’ll be here when you wake up.” Wrapped up in Bucky’s warmth it wasn’t long before her eyes began to grow heavy, still she managed to move her head back to look over Bucky’s face as she whispered, “I still can’t believe you came.” Bucky leaned forward pressing his forehead against hers replying quietly, “I will always come when you call.”
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aikaterini-drag · 4 months
Text
Smiles and Smooches
Summary: You get drunk and demand kisses and hugs from your boyfriend. He is more than happy to please you.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader (no mention of y/n)
Warnings: no smut, takes place during tfatws, boyfriend Bucky, emotional security, fluff, kisses.
Kofi ❤️ Wattpad 🧡 AO3 🩷 ASK ME 🩵
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The night carried a pleasant breeze, the stars twinkling. You and Bucky sat close together under the dimmed light of a cozy booth at your favorite bar. The hum of laughter and clinking glasses surrounded you. And tonight, you were a little tipsier than usual. You had consumed two of your favorite cocktails— despite your boyfriend’s advice to take it slow. Bucky, unlike you, couldn't get drunk no matter how hard he tried, thanks to his super soldier genes. He had finished the last sips of your drink, attempting to prevent you from feeling sick later on.
Thankfully, you were feeling fine. Only slightly drunk and blissfully happy inside.
With flushed cheeks and a captivating smile, you shifted on your chair and leaned toward him.
"You know, babe," you slurred slightly, "you're like... seriously the best thing that's ever happened to me."
Bucky couldn't help but half-laugh. “I told you, you shouldn’t have ordered that second drink, sweets. You’re drunk.”
“I’m fine.” You hiccuped and hugged his arm. “It’s not my fault you’re superman.”
“Super-soldier,” he corrected with another half laugh.
“Tsk… is the same. You’re my strong, virile man. And I love you!”
He grinned and gently brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. "And you're the best thing that's ever happened to me.”
You beamed at him, your fingers tracing patterns on his bionic hand. "No, I love you more! Seriously, you're, like, super super cute. I mean, like, cuter than, like, a basket of puppies."
He chuckled at your comparison. “What an adorable declaration of love.”
“You’re adorable.” Your breath ghosted over his lips. “My adorable James. My Bucky.”
He smiled and kissed across your forehead. “Well, that’s debatable. I have the most adorable girl in the world right here with me."
Your cheeks flushed an even deeper shade of pink. "Can I have a hug? Please? You give the best hugs."
Who was he to deny you? He eagerly wrapped his arm around you and pulled you close. You melted into his embrace, your head resting on his chest, your fingers playing with the fabric of his shirt. You popped a button and he chuckled and gripped your hands gently.
“No funny business, sweets.”
You pouted. “Want to kiss you. Everywhere.”
He kneaded your hair. “We’re in a bar full of people.”
“Then let’s go home,” you said as your mouth trailed a path of warmth along his unshaven jawline.
“I’m not letting you drink ever again. You get turned into a little kiss monster.”
You giggled. “Your kiss monster.”
“Mine. Always.” He hummed, his voice a warm murmur.
“Take me home, sarge.”
“Home it is, my sweet.”
After taking care of the bill, he held you up, his arms wounding around you to steady you. You still felt a little tipsy but you were also so happy and warm, holding him close, inhaling his fresh masculine scent. Holding you protectively against him, he led the way to the apartment you shared.
As they walked, he glanced at her. “Why did you drink so much, sweets? You dislike it.”
You sighed and clutched his arm. “I’m just sad you’re going on another mission. I don’t want you to be hurt. I meant to have one drink but… I lost control a bit, I guess.”
Bucky stopped and cupped your flushed face. “Hey, don’t worry. I’ll be fine. You know I’ve got this.”
“So what if you’re good at it? Does that mean you have to risk your life without concerns?” Tears welled up in your eyes. “What if something happens to you?”
Exhaling, he drew you into a tight embrace. “I’ll be careful, I promise. You know I’ll always come back to you.”
You nestled into his arms, suppressing a sob. “I just hate seeing you go into danger again.”
“I know, sweetheart. But it’s what I do. And I do it to protect people like you, people I care about,” he said, pressing gentle kisses on your moist cheeks. “Don’t cry. I’ll be counting the minutes until I can come back to you.”
“Promise?” You gazed up at him, searching his ocean eyes for reassurance.
“I promise.”
“My Bucky,” you said, caressing his face. “I love you,” you whispered, your voice filled with emotion.
He held you tighter, pressing a kiss to your lips. “Love you too, more than words can express, sweets.”
With his arms wrapped around you, you stayed there for a while, holding each other, kissing lazily. His lips brushed against yours repeatedly, his tongue coaxing your mouth apart and slipping inside. He consumed you, with his touches and his warmth, until there was nothing left but his warm gentle touches and the assurance that everything would be alright.
Follow for more content 🩵 Reblogs or any other kind of support are greatly appreciated. Hugs and kisses 🩷
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lokiswifeduh · 1 month
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can’t help but drown
pairings: Bucky x fem!reader
summary: the past few months you think you have a handle on your anxiety. but after a silent panic attack in the bathtub, Bucky is there to pull you out.
warnings: panic attack, anxiety, feeling helpless, feelings of suffocation, ANGST!!!
The water moved in soft ruffles around you. Not quite making waves, however, moving from how your anxious legs swayed the water.
Shallow breaths and water hitting the porcelain tub softly were all you could hear. Your body was too overheated, your mind was racing and you could feel your heartbeat in your hands.
You didn't know where this sudden burst of anxiety and panic had risen from. Just that you couldn't get out of the water. Something was keeping you down. Making your body drown.
"Doll?" A sudden tap on the door knocked you out of your trance. You swallowed, your throat feeling like sandpaper against your tongue. "Y-yeah?" Your voice cracked, and you silently cursed knowing Bucky would notice. That super soldier hearing never lets you live anything down.
"You've been in there for a while." You heard him lean against the door, "Is everything alright?" You nodded, remembering as much as Bucky could hear you better than most, he definitely can't see through walls.
"Y-yes. I'm alright, just...uh." You tried to think. Any excuse would work. Bucky might not believe you but he would let the topic go. "Just needed some extra alone time tonight."
"Oh," Bucky mumbled through the door. "Okay, doll." You could feel the hurt in his voice. You didn't need alone time from him. You didn't need to be alone at all right now but he couldn't see you like this.
A sweaty, anxious, mess.
You didn't know how much time had passed. Your nails attempt to dig into the porcelain of the tub, but to no avail, you're only yourself in the process. "Sweetheart?" Bucky taps on the door once more, "Please talk to me." You try to speak, but only a mumble comes out. The bubbles in the bath are gone. Only leaving a white film on top of the now room-temperature water.
"Doll, I'm coming in." You attempt to refuse but nothing comes out as Bucky breaks the lock on the door, softly opening it. You can't look at him. You won't.
You keep your head forward, staring into the wall as you feel Bucky kneel beside you.
He can see how hard your nails are clutching onto the side of the tub, softly lifting your hand as you ball your fist. Your nails now digging into the skin of your palm; drawing blood.
"Hey, hey." Bucky unclenches your fist, letting your nails hurt his metal hand instead.
Using his flesh hand, he softly places a palm on your cheek, bringing your eyes to his. "Doll, what's going on? Talk to me." You shake your head, eyes falling closed as more tears adorn your already-flushed cheeks.
"Okay, that's okay." Bucky whispers, "But I need to get you out of this tub sweetheart." He doesn't need to feel the water to know you've been in the bath for far too long.
"Can I get you out, doll?" You slowly nod, your chin shaking with the sobs you so badly don't want to release.
Bucky mumbles an alright. Moving one of his arms under your legs, the other holding your back as you clutch onto his shirt.
He lifts you up, the water rolling off of your body and soaking his once-dry clothes. "I'm so sorry." You mumble, repeating it over and over as your body starts to shiver from the temperature difference. "Shhh, you're okay, sweetheart."
Bucky wraps a towel around the exposed side of your body, attempting to keep you warm as he brings you into your shared bedroom. "I'm gonna lay you down, doll."
You shake your head violently, clutching onto his henley even harder. "Please, please don't leave me."
Bucky sits down with you still in his arms on the bed, your legs now lying over his as he holds you. "I won't. I promise, sweetheart I'm not leaving."
You both sit there for a moment, tears falling from your eyes, him rocking you back and forth as an old record played from the living room.
You start to feel a weight lift off your chest, your heartbeat calming slightly at the touch of Bucky's arms on yours. You start to speak, wanting to explain yourself when Bucky shushes you. "You don't have to explain sweetheart." He kisses the crown of your head, your hair still wet. "You can talk when you're ready." You nod, continuously wondering how you found someone so caring and endearing. "I just..." You looked up at Bucky, his blue eyes shining down at you with such love. "I felt like I was drowning." He nods, "Sometimes we can't help but drown, doll."
Kissing your forehead once again, he squeezes your body tighter to his. "But I'll be there every time to pull you from the water.
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s0urw00lf · 2 months
Text
All the time
Bucky Barnes x reader
The three times you called his name. The one time he answered.
1940’s era: James Barnes
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Y/n l/n had regrettably found herself on a date with a something shed be called unladylike for saying asshole. To be fair her mother wouldn’t let her turn the man down, ready to get her married off before the war. She was currently at the movies sitting beside him as his arm draped sloppily over her shoulder and much to close to her breast for her liking all the while he continuously yelled for the movie to start. People all over the theater were ‘shhh’ing him but he didn’t care as he continued on, making y/n want to melt into her seat with embarrassment. You heard from behind you “hey, wanna show some respect?” Someone whispered. You turned around to see a small frail man, you mouthed ‘I’m sorry” and he just nodded back. Again “who cared, Just start the cartoon” he said. Y/n sighed about to get up and leave until the small man spoke up again “hey you wanna shut up?” At that point Tommy heard him and turned towards him.
Somehow you found yourself in the alleyway trying to pull Tommy off of the guy. “Tommy that’s enough” you said pulling his arm, he pushed you down hard making you hit your head on a rock and you felt the blood immediately pool down your face not fully aware of what was going on anymore, until you were pulled up softly “you okay ma’am” you were asked. “Yes, yes I’m fine he needs More help than me” you said pointing to the fight, not even looking at the man that helped you up, more focused on the blood running down your face. You soon saw Tommy walk past you and grabbed your wrist firmly “come on y/n” he said angrily. You struggled against his grip “let me go you pig” you said as you clawed at his hand trying to separate it from your wrist. He didn’t budge “let go of me you disgusting pig” you cried putting as much resistance as you could.
Tommy finally turned and gave you the worst bitch face and forcefully pushed you back as he let go. You fell to the muddy ground, and tears formed in your eyes when you looked down and seen how dirty yourself and your dress was. The two men had seen the whole interaction and rushed to help you up. “Thanks” you said not making eye contact with either as you tried to make yourself a bit more presentable even though those stains weren’t gonna come out without some stern washing. You finally looked up when the shorter man spoke “no thank you for trying to help me. I’m Steve by the way. Steve rogers” he said. You nodded “y/n l/n, wish we could’ve met on better terms” you said with a small laugh. “Steve seems to find trouble everywhere he goes. James Barnes” the other man spoke. You finally took a good look at him and you let out a gasp when you made eye contact with the bluest eyes you’ve ever seen.
He towered over you and his brunet hair only heightened his handsome features. “Oh, uh yeah I mean it happens right?” You replied trying to cover up how shocked you were at his handsome face. He smiled and nodded, making you melt a little. Suddenly you’d felt a little more self conscious. “Hey Steve, how about you go get cleaned up and I’ll walk miss y/n here home.” James says. Steve looked up at him in confusion “why, we goin somewhere?” He asked. James nodded “the future” he said smiling and handed Steve a pamphlet. Steve studied the pamphlet before nodding and making his way home with a nod to you and a pat on James’s back. James led you back to the sidewalk and you began to get dirty looks from people passing by, making you even more uncomfortable and self conscious .
James luckily noticed and started up conversation in hopes to distract you, “So, what where you doing here with, and excuse my language, an asshole like that” he asked. She sighed “my mom, she wants me married or at least in the process of getting married. She’s getting old and my pa passed some time ago, she doesn’t think I can make it on my own.” You said bitterly. You looked at him taking in his attire for the first time “you getting shipped out?” You asked. He nodded “Sargent James Barnes, shipped out to England first thing tomorrow morning” he said standing proud. You nodded lowering your head to watch your shoes as you walk feeling a bit disappointed because he and his friend were the first decent men you’d come across in all of Brooklyn.
“James Barnes”
—————
Winter soldier era
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after being let out of cyro for the first time in decades the soldier was led to a morally grey room, by the same man with round glasses shed seen before she went into the cyro. Aside from the table and two medal chairs, the room was empty much like the rest of the facility.
The only difference from the rest is there was a lingering presence in the darkest corner of the room. All she could see was the shining of something silver. She made no face, showed no sign of weakness, because she couldn’t, she’d been erased of everything. Fear included. But she stayed on high alert, ready to defend herself and her boss. “Sit” zolo demanded.
She took a stealthy seat, not making any noise as she did so, not even as her boot made contact with the ground on the other side of the chair. She stared at the man who had also taken a seat in front of her. “You have been assigned a new partner, it he has been made to match your every move as if it was your own. You fit together like a puzzle.” The man stated.
She nodded letting the man know she understood. “Step out soldat” the man demanded. At the corner of her eye she’d seen it, the smoothest movement as the figure slipped out of the darkness and into the light. “Meet the winter soldier” said zolo. She slowly turned her head meeting the steel blue eyes. ‘Barnes’ the name had echoed in her head but she was careful not to let her expression shift. She looked back to zolo only to see him eyeing the herself and the soldier carefully. She chose not to make it known. “Do we have a mission?” She asked, voice hoarse from not being used in so long.
“You do” he said and smiled his sickening smile. A file was placed in front of her, the soldier came to stand behind her so he could see, she almost felt at ease. She opened the file only to be met with a photo of a blonde haired blue eyed man. Captain ‘Steve rogers’ America. “What do you want us to do?” The man finally spoke behind her. His voice deep and hoarse as well. “Find him. Bring him alive. Beat him to the brink of death if you have to. But. Bring. Him. Alive.” He demanded. The pair nodded in understanding, before bing dismissed.
as they made their way to the jet and got stocked up on weapons and ammo the name ‘Barnes’ kept running through her head. So much so that it slipped out of her mouth.
“Barnes”
—————-
Fatws era
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The last time you’d come face to face with james it was after the thanos war, you’d lived with nat while you were figuring things out before then you’d been snapped and now you’re living close toSam’s sister Sarah, helping her out with the boys. On this particular day you had walked into Sarah’s house in search of some flour, as you had ran out some days ago, “hey sara-“ you called but stopped yourself as your eyes landed on an all to familiar shield in the hands of Sarah’s boys. “Hey where’d you-“ she began to question but the oldest shushed her and pointed to the couch. Y/ns brows furrowed as she looked only to see that all too familiar face, obviously just now waking up. She ushered the boys away, but was quick to take the shield before they slipped too far out of her reach. “Hey, I uh- i didn’t know that you were here” she said awkwardly. “I just got here yesterday. I didn’t know you lived here” he said as he sat up from his laying position. “Oh no no. I don’t live here. Like here as in this house, I’m neighbors with Sarah.” You said shaking your head.
All he did was smile at you in amusement, making your cheeks heat up. “Uh well i only came to get something, I’ll be out of here soon” you said slowly backing away into the kitchen. Helping yourself to the flower you’d initially came to get. As you passed him again, he looked lost in thought so you cleared your throat, once again catching his attention. “Uh i live next door, if you uh- ever wanna come by and talk things over” you said nervously picking at your fingers. He smiled that charming smile that had you swooning since day one and nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind” he said. You nodded and backed away from the room and out of the door you used to enter the house.
a while had gone by since your interaction with James and if you’re being honest, you are really disappointed because you were looking forward to seeing him again. You are about to pack up for bed when a knock on your door broke you out of your daydream. You went to cautious because old habits die hard, you open the door to come face-to-face with James Buchanan Barnes. “Oh, hey I wasn’t expecting you” you’d said stupidly before you could think. You were totally expecting him, hoping and praying for him to knock on your door. “If im gonna be honest i want going to. Last time we’d seen each other we left off on a kiss and a barely confessed ‘I love you’. Sam told me not to let that go again.” He said sincerely. “ Well, Sam was right. Ever the wingman, no pun intended” you said letting out a laugh, as did he. Before either of you could make another remark, Bucky rushed forward and pressed a kiss to your lips. The kiss was soft and full of longing and warmth, happiness flooded you like you just took your first drink of hot chocolate on a chilly winter morning. The two of you separated breathing heavily
“my Bucky Barnes.”
“My Y/n L/n”
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littleredwolf · 1 year
Text
Spontaneous Shenanigans
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Summary: Y/N can always count on Bucky to turn a disappointing evening around. 
Warnings: BRIEF mention of Bucky’s PTSD/overstepping boundaries.
Words: 1,107
A/N: The whole ‘failed date’ scenario just popped into my head and I thought some Bucky fluff would be the perfect way to remedy it! 
--
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You huffed a sigh as you shut the door behind you and slipped off your shoes, relieved to be back at the tower and out of your uncomfortable heels after yet another failed date. This routine was growing tiresome now, and after tonight you were considering admitting defeat and giving up the dating game altogether. You flicked through your various dating apps as you made your way to your room, coming across Bucky making hot chocolate on your way past the kitchen.  
“Hey doll,” he greeted with a smile, frowning when he glanced at the clock on the oven. “I wasn’t expecting you back this early.”
“Yeah, neither was I,” you chuckled dryly, rolling your eyes for dramatic effect as you mounted a stool at the counter. “Needless to say I’m glad to be home.”
“Let me guess…he spent the whole time talking about the Avengers,” Bucky remarked, offering you his freshly made cup of hot chocolate and grabbing a mug to make another for himself. “Who took the spotlight this time?” 
You took a sip of the warm beverage, feeling instant comfort, before answering. 
"Steve." 
Bucky shook his head.  
“Damn, as much as I love the guy, the idea of spending my evening answering questions about him kinda ruins the mood…" he began, topping off his drink with some spray cream.  
The sight of the Winter Soldier delicately placing marshmallows on his hot chocolate was one that never failed to amuse you, and you smiled fondly as you watched his gentle hands at work.  
"I've lost count of how many times my dates have asked me for his number or the address of the gym he works out at," he continued. "It's like they see us as their all-access ticket to get the inside scoop." 
You couldn't help but agree - as grateful as you were to be a part of the team, there were times when it felt more like a burden than a blessing. People didn't want to get to know you, only the company you kept. It was exhausting at times, but you were glad to have people like Bucky who understood the hardships and the less glamorous side of being part of a team of superheroes. 
"I am sorry about your date though, doll," the super soldier added as he came around the counter to sit beside you. "It sucks when they don't work out the way you'd hoped." 
"Thanks Buck," you smiled. 
"Did you at least get dessert?" Bucky asked, his jaw dropping as you shook your head. "Really!? A true gentleman always lets his lady order dessert!" 
"If we'd have made it to dessert I think I'd have ended up killing the guy," you laughed as you took another sip from your mug. 
"That's fair, but it still ain't right," he concurred with a shake of his head. "You wanna go grab some ice cream?" 
You nodded enthusiastically and gulped down the last of your hot chocolate, getting remnants of cream on your nose in the process and causing Bucky to laugh heartily.  
You threw him a sour look as you wiped your nose clean then, quick as a flash, you dipped your finger in the leftover cream and swiped it on your laughing friend's nose. Bucky immediately froze and turned to you with a dark expression, and for a brief moment you feared you'd overstepped. 
Was he okay with unexpected touching? Had you triggered an unpleasant memory by crossing his boundaries? 
You met his gaze with uncertainty and prepared an apology on the tip of your tongue, but relaxed when his lips twitched and pulled up into a smirk. 
"Oh, you'll regret that," he remarked, eyes blazing with mischief as he reached for the can of cream across the counter. 
"You gotta catch me first!" You retaliated, launching yourself from the stool and breaking into a run as Bucky scrambled after you. 
Your combined laughs bounced off the walls as he chased you around the ground floor, finally catching up to you in the lounge. Leaping over the couch, he easily dodged every cushion you flung his way in your desperate attempt at escape, grinning wickedly as he cornered you. 
You backed up as far as you could go, pressing yourself up against the wall in the hope that you might somehow magically pass through it. As Bucky towered over you with a menacing look in his eye, the can of cream raised and aimed at you, you shot your hands up in surrender. 
"Parley!" You squeaked, and Bucky faltered in his steps. He held your gaze for a moment as he considered your plea, then lowered the can with a shake of his head. 
"Those damn pirate movies," he mused, stepping back and granting your freedom. "I'm not gonna watch anything else with you if you're just gonna use them against me!"
"Hey now, our movie nights are about more than just the movies you know - it's important education!" 
"Alright boss, whatever you say," he said with a chuckle and another shake of his head. 
"Hmm, boss. Now I do like the sound of that," you remarked, falling into step beside him as the two of you made your way back to the kitchen. 
"Don't get used to it," he warned, giving you a playful nudge that sent you off-balance. You nudged him back, supposing that you’d have more luck moving a brick wall than trying to throw Bucky off-course. He laughed at your pitiful attempt and turned his attention to tidying the kitchen, which didn’t take long with your help. 
“So how about that ice cream?” He asked and you eagerly nodded. 
“Let me just get changed real quick, I think I’m a little overdressed for ice cream,” you added, referring to your date attire. 
Bucky assessed your outfit, his unwavering gaze causing you to feel suddenly self-conscious. You’d taken great care in getting ready for the evening, highlighting your ‘assets’ in your attempts to look your best - it felt strange yet oddly exhilarating having Bucky paying attention to them. 
“Sure,” he gruffly agreed, blinking rapidly as he set about locating his phone and wallet. “I’ll meet you in the car.” 
A blush crept its way to your cheeks as you watched Bucky fumble around, feeling a self-esteem boost at the sight of the flustered super soldier. Now it was your turn to laugh and shake your head as you made your way up to your room to change, actually feeling relieved that your date hadn’t gone according to plan and looking forward to spending the evening with a good friend and some ice cream.
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bi-disaster-yn · 2 years
Text
Remnants of a Life
Pairing: husband!Bucky Barnes x wife!Reader
Summary: Bucky has the chance to get some of his possessions from his life in the 40s back but he needs his wife there to face it with him.
A/N: I had this idea in my head for a while but was inspired to write it when I saw this post and the comment @snugglingbucky left on it. I originally hadn’t intended for them to be married either but @buckiesbabie and I agreed that we needed more husband!Bucky fics. Enjoy! <3
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“Just this way, sir.” the young and nervous museum clerk gestured down the clinically lit hallway. The invitation was intended for Bucky but the young man ended up directing it at you when he noticed your husband’s vacant expression. You nodded to him in response and gave Bucky’s hand a squeeze.
Normally Bucky’s strides easily overtook yours but today it was like his boots were filled with lead as he laboriously dragged them along the floor. You pulled him along with you gently as you followed the clerk.
Bucky’s hesitation did not come as a surprise to you. He’d been quiet and distant ever since he’d received the call from the Smithsonian. In an interesting turn of events, his sister, Rebecca Barnes had donated some of his belongings to the museum when Bucky had tragically fallen from the train. It was her way of telling the world her brother’s story. She’d hoped that if she shared pieces of him that people would remember him the way he always should be remembered: as a young man who’d given his life for his country. A hero.
The museum was only too happy to accept and had put the collection on display in the exhibit dedicated to Steve. In their minds, these were the belongings of a dead man which could be fashioned and shown off in any way that they chose. It then became clear after the Sokovia Accords and the blip that these items belonged to someone very much alive who had so much taken from him already. The least he deserved was the opportunity to take his possessions back.
The museum extended the olive branch to Bucky who could only bring himself to be here and face his past life because you’d agreed to come with him.
“Now, as I said before, you’re free to take anything you like. The rest we will either use for the Captain America exhibit or we will preserve.” The clerk explained as you reached the door, again intended for Bucky but instead being directed towards you.
Bucky had internalised his feelings about being presented with relics of his old life. He’d moved on and had settled into the modern age, adjusting to life after Hydra. He met and married you, the love of his life and someone he was always destined to find. Even if he had found another way to the present, or you had somehow found your way to the past; Bucky truly believed that you would always have found each other.
Nonetheless, your timeline had manifested the way it did; with years of Bucky in captivity and then having to adapt and recover in a new world. He thought himself an entirely different person now and was terrified of having to face his old life. The anxiety that he wouldn’t be able to recognise his old self made his chest tighten and he held on to your hand tightly in a desperate attempt to ground himself.
“You ready, Buck?” You asked softly, giving his hand another gentle squeeze and rubbed your thumb over his knuckles soothingly.
“Yeah.” Bucky sighed, finally acknowledging the clerk and giving him a nod. Your husband took a deep breath as the door was unlocked and opened for him.
The little room containing Bucky’s things was eery. Everything was folded and presented neatly for his inspection on tables that ran along the length of a room. Bucky scanned everything, recognising them but not feeling a claim over them in any way. It was like these objects had belonged to a ghost and he would be a thief if he dared to take anything from their special place.
After assessing that Bucky wouldn’t make the first move, you took some careful steps towards the table to observe the items on display. You nonchalantly inspected each item, ghosting your fingertips over them. Your ability to make this look like not such a big deal inspired Bucky to follow after you. He didn’t need to be so scared: he had you.
Your fingertips had landed on his cap that sat atop his neatly folded war uniform. You traced along the edges of it and felt the roughness of the old fabric on your skin.
“I made Steve try that on when they first gave me my uniform, it looked so funny and large on his small head.” Bucky chuckled sheepishly, looking down and playing with his hands.
It was the first time Bucky had said a full sentence all day and it had taken you by surprise. Looking up at him, you met his gaze and gave him an animated smile which invited him to tell you more.
“Well, Steve was the one that actually wanted to go to war. I was drafted. I uh… I wanted to make him feel like part of it, you know? He was always doing stupid stuff like getting into fights he’d never win. I thought if he tried on the uniform that it would get the stupid idea out of his head.” Bucky continued.
He looked at your eager face and realised you hadn’t said anything in a while. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m droning on.” He quickly said and went back to rubbing his vibranium thumb in little circles on the palm of his flesh hand.
“No please, tell me more.” You encouraged, perfectly content to listen to his stories from the 40s that Bucky rarely, if ever, shared with you. In truth, it sometimes felt like your husband had a double life and the side from the 40s was something that you were not permitted entry to. It seemed that you knew more about his time as the winter soldier rather than as the young man from Brooklyn who took pretty girls out on a Friday night with his scrawny friend and was dragged into a war he didn’t want to fight in.
“Well,” Bucky started, shuffling closer to the table to get a better look at everything. His hand found its way to the small of your back and it stayed there, being steadied both physically and mentally by you. It made you grin and as you looked up at him you could see the stern concentration of his face while his brain processed the memories.
“This isn’t anything special, it’s just a watch my dad gave to me.” He explained as he landed on a simple watch with a small round face and a brown leather strap. “Although, he did always say that it was important to never be late, so I guess it taught me a valuable lesson. And have I ever been late?”
You giggled and shook your head in response to his question which he had partnered with a cheeky grin. “No, baby. You were always on time for our dates. Picked me up at the exact times you said you would.”
“Exactly.” He smiled warmly at you. “Couldn’t have my best girl waiting.”
Bucky looked at the clerk as if for permission before putting the watch on but then a tinge of embarrassment flushed as he realised he didn’t need to. It was his watch; he could take it or leave it as he pleased. His focus returned to the watch and soon it found itself back on his wrist where it belonged.
It ignited a new confidence in Bucky as he stood up a little straighter and analysed the remaining items on the table with more purpose. He let out a chuckle as he picked up a book that was obviously from a bygone era from the cover design but was otherwise perfectly preserved. Your eyes followed Bucky’s fingers as he traced shapes on the mountains on the hardback cover. It was a copy of Tolkien’s The Hobbit.
“Sam will laugh when he hears about this.” Bucky said. “He seemed to be surprised that I knew about Gandalf. But I read this when it first came out, way before the movies were released.”
“Who knew my husband was such a nerd?” You smirked and pinched his side playfully. Bucky let out a hearty laugh; his eyes creased and he flashed those brilliant white teeth. It made your heart do a victory leap to see him relax and get more comfortable. The anxiety that had plagued him before coming here was ebbing away by the second.
“I hope this isn’t a dealbreaker for you.” He joked, rubbing his thumbs over the book as if he was considering purchasing it in a store.
“Of course not.” You kissed his cheek and rubbed his back. “Are you gonna take it?”
“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I have a copy of it on the Kindle you got me for Christmas.”
“Yeah, but this is beautiful, and –“ you opened the front cover of the book “it’s a first edition! Bucky, if you don’t take it then I will!”
“Alright, alright!” Bucky chuckled and sat it down to the side so he could review more of his possessions.
A ring sat in the middle of everything and you might have missed it if you weren’t looking for it. Instinctively, Bucky grabbed it and picked it up. The smile on his face from earlier had been replaced with a frown and his lip quivered slightly.
“This was mom’s ring! I wish Rebecca had kept that.” Bucky sighed, holding on to the ring with both of his thumbs, as though it would shatter if he dropped it. “I know she wanted me to have it, to give to my wife, but Rebecca deserved to hold on to it. She thought I was dead afterall.”
It was a pretty ring; a gold band with lilac oval stones forming a flower shape. It was probably a very grand thing for a working class woman of her time to own.
“It’s a very pretty ring, Buck. At least it’s with its rightful owner now.” You commented in a bid to reassure him.
“Well actually, you’re its rightful owner,” Bucky smiled lightly at you. “Like I said, mom wanted me to give it to my wife. Sorry it arrived a little late. I would have liked to have proposed to you with it but I thought it was lost forever.”
You thanked him by putting your hand to the back of his head and pulling his face in to press a loving kiss to his forehead. The gesture left you feeling grateful to have been trusted with something clearly so precious to Bucky. For a long time now, you had been used to being the only family that Bucky had. This introduction into his old life had admittedly, made you feel a bit alienated. It was the life he was supposed to have but he was cruelly stripped of. Whilst you had accepted that you would never have the relationship with Rebecca and his parents that you had wanted, it still stung that the opportunity had been snatched from both you and him.
Bucky giving you this ring and connecting his old life with his new one reminded you that in every circumstance, in every chain of events, in every universe: he was meant to find you.
“Bucky, I don’t know what to say.” You eventually offered. Bucky lifted your hand to try and put the ring on one of your fingers but it became clear very quickly that it was not going to fit. It only deepened the severity of his frown.
“I mean, we can always go somewhere to get that fixed. People can do that right? Alter the size of rings?” Bucky started to panic, fixating on the ring with fierce concentration as though his staring was a magical power that would change the size of it.
You offered a small smile in response, also disappointed that the ring wouldn’t fit. It seemed to invalidate your earlier theory that he was meant to find you. If it were true, the ring would have fit perfectly.
Nevertheless, you mulled it over. That ring wasn’t a symbol of Bucky’s love for you; the one already on your left hand which he had picked out carefully and specifically was. This was his mother’s ring, a Barnes family heirloom. He was its rightful owner and the one most deserving to hold on to it. An idea formulated in your head as you spotted Bucky’s dog tags peeping out of the collar of his t-shirt.
Without warning, you reached up and pulled the chain over his head and undid the clasp. You took the ring from Bucky’s now trembling fingers and fed it through the chain so that the ring sat next to the tags, making a rather chunky necklace.
You presented it back to him with an explanation. “Now you’ll always have a piece of your mom to carry round with you. Then, when you give your tags to me when you go on missions, I’ll take care of her for you and we can wait together on our Bucky coming home.”
Bucky swallowed thickly, overwhelmed at how thoughtful and sincere you were. He tried to speak several times but his throat closed over and kept him silent. You gave him a small smile and put the tags round his neck again and he immediately clasped his flesh hand over the ring now situated on his chest over his heart. You ran your fingers through his hair slowly to ground him.
“I love you.” He choked out eventually, still holding on to the ring as though it would disappear if he let go.
“I know,” you smiled. “I love you too.”
Bucky inhaled deeply as he took one last scan over the items. He put his hand on a small antique frame containing a sepia tone photograph of Bucky in his war uniform and a girl who looked a lot younger than him who you deduced as being Rebecca.
Rebecca had sat on a chair while Bucky stood next to her with his hands behind his back – a pose that had made him look older and wiser than he probably had been when the picture was taken. It was like a picture your grandparent would show you so that you may have an insight on their youth. Instead, you recognised your husband that you had found yourself only too lucky to wake up to everyday. The only difference was the man standing next to you had a vibranium arm and the weight of years of atrocities on his shoulders.
“She’d have really liked you, you know?” Bucky finally said, tracing his thumb over Rebecca’s face.
“Do you think so?” You asked, peering over his shoulder to get a better look at the photograph. This was the only connection you had to his sister and you studied her image in hopes it might make you understand her better.
“I know so.” He asserted. “She’d see how happy you make me and that would be all that mattered.”
“You make me really happy too, Bucky.” You grinned and gave his back another quick rub. His gaze was still concentrating on the picture and you decided it was best to let him have a moment with his sister. You picked up The Hobbit and made your way over to the door to wait on him. He stood in contented silence for a few more moments before straightening his back and coming over to join you.
“Did you get everything you wanted?” The clerk addressed Bucky after having waited outside while you both toured Bucky’s past.
“Do you have a copy of this picture?” Bucky asked, completely ignoring the question posed to him and held up the picture of him and Rebecca so he could see.
“We do, sir. We keep copies and scans of everything.”
“Well, I think you should put it in the exhibit.” Bucky said, taking another look down at the picture. “If you wanna tell my story, you gotta tell hers too.”
“Sure, Sergeant Barnes, I’ll pass that on.” The clerk enthusiastically agreed and led the way out while you and Bucky followed leisurely.
“That was a nice thing you did for Rebecca, I’m so proud of you.” You beamed at him. He put his arm round you and flashed you one of his perfect and pearly white smiles that never failed to bring out a rose tint on your cheeks.
“She deserves it.” He replied and kissed your temple gently. “Thank you for coming today. I didn’t want to face this on my own.”
Your arm found its way round his back and your hand rested on his hip, sighing contentedly. “I would do anything for you, Buck.”
“I’d do anything for you too.”
Both of you felt a sense of vitality and freshness as you left the building, despite the items you were leaving with being decades old. The nervous man you’d came here with this morning had been left behind and, in his place, had emerged an assured and satisfied one. The watch, novel, ring and photograph seemed unnoteworthy on their own but they closed the gap between Bucky’s life with you and his life in the 40s in your mind. There was no longer a divide between you and Rebecca and his parents; now unionised with these remnants of his old life and with your love for Bucky.
A complete family.
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lives-in-midgard · 1 year
Text
A special gift
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 Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Summary: Reader celebrates Christmas with the Avengers.
Masterlist
Today is Christmas and you are really looking forward for the Secret Santa game and the dinner at the compound. You are very excited to see who got you and what Thor will think about his present and of course what Bucky will say.
“Hey Babe” you say while opening the door to Bucky´s room. You see him sitting at the desk trying to wrap Wanda´s gift.
“Hey Doll” he says with a smile on his face. Then looks at the gift again and then back at you.
“Do you need help Buck?” You ask your boyfriend with a chuckle and he nods. You go to him and sit on his lap and wrap the gift. He holds you from behind and gives you a kiss on the neck.
“Thanks doll, I wouldn’t know what to do without you.” You turn around and face him. You smile at each other, and he cups your face with his hands and gives you a passionate kiss on the lips.
“Do you want to cuddle until dinner?” Bucky asks you with a smile.
“Of course, I want, what question is that.” You say and he laughs. You go to his bed and snuggle up to each other.
“I love you so much Bucky” you whisper while lying on his chest.
“I love you too Y/n” You hear him say.
An hour later you say: “Buck I think we have to make us ready for dinner.”                                           
“Doll, we have an hour left, there is enough time, let's wait for a while I don’t want to get up right now.
“Oh, Baby I also don’t want to get up, but I want to look good and wear something beautiful. It is my first Christmas here, it has to be something special.” You say to him. “Doll you are always beautiful, and it will be something special I promise.” Bucky says to you while looking at you. You start to smile.
“Thanks, babe but we still have to get up now, but I promise you that we have enough cuddle time afterwards.” He begins to smile and gives you a kiss, then starts to stand up and you go to your room to change your clothes.
“Are you ready doll” You hear Bucky say while knocking at your door.                                                 
“Yes, you can come in Buck.” You yell from the bathroom. He goes in your room, and you go to him. He immediately begins to smile when he sees you in that beautiful dress you wear.                                                                        
“You look so beautiful."
“Thanks Buck, you look great too.” You say and give him a kiss on the cheek. Then you go to the living room with your presents and put them under the tree.
“The meal was so good, Wands!” You say with a smile to your best friend who sits at the other side of the table holding Vision's hand. “Thanks Y/n. Thank you all for this beautiful time this means so much to me.” She says with a smile on her face, everyone smiles, and they start conversations.
After a while the group goes to the tree to give each other the gifts. Steve has Nat. Nat has Bucky. Bucky has Wanda who is very excited about the cooking book she gets from him. Then Peter gives his gift to you, and you open it and find a beautiful snow globe in it. You thank him and give him a hug. After that you give Thor your present. He is very excited to open it.                                                                             
“Guys look what I got from Y/n a cup which says strongest avenger on it!” He screams with full excitement. You and the others start to laugh.
“Thanks Lady Y/n, I really love it.”
“Of course, Thor, I am happy that you like it.“  
After everyone got there presents Bucky came to you and says, “Close your eyes doll.” You do as he says. “Now open” When you open your eyes you see him holding his dogtags in his hands.
“I don’t understand baby?”
“I want to give them to you, so you always have a piece of me with you whenever I am away, so you know you are not alone.” He says and presses a soft kiss on your lips and whips with his thumb from your cheek a tear away.                                                     
“Thanks Bucky, I love it so much and I won’t take them off, they are safe with me. I love you so much. And now my gift for you” You give him a small gift.                                  
“Wow doll, this is amazing. I love it we are going to have such a good time in Coney Island. It's been such a long time since I’ve been there.” You thought it would be a good idea to make a vacation just for the two of you.
Then you all watch a Christmas movie together and you fall asleep beside Bucky he puts a blanket over you and gives you a soft kiss on the forehead.  
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make-me-imagine · 2 years
Text
Take the Chance
Prompt: "I've never met anyone that has made me feel this way." Requested by: @gatefleet (one of your mystery prompt requests)
Plot: Bucky finally gets tired of hiding his feelings for Y/n + A bit of pining Bucky.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader
Warnings: None!
Words: 1.1k
General Taglist: @criminaly-supernatural, @caswinchester2000, @imaginesfire, @rexit-mo MCU/Bucky Taglist: @aquariuslavenderhoney, @trashywritestrash, @resplendentlady, @marvelouslyme96, @supersourlemon13, @mochamoff, @simsiddy, @peter-parkers-cullen-nerd, @flourishandblotts-inc, @cosplayingwitch
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Bucky didn't realize how long he had been staring. Watching you as you worked, trying to get information for your recent mission. He was supposed to be oblivious, blending in, an ordinary face in the crowd. But he couldn't pull his eyes away from you.
The way you smiled and joked with the target, weaseling your way into his good graces, waiting for him to make a mistake. It was like torture to Bucky, he knew your smiles weren't genuine, the laughs weren't real, but he hated watching you with someone else.
When you smiled and laughed with Bucky, it made his heart swell, his palm sweat, and dare he say, gave him butterflies. But watching you act that way with someone else, fake or not, left a bad taste in his mouth, and a hollow feeling in his gut.
He could imagine you acting this way with someone else, genuinely, being with someone who isn't him. That thought alone made his heart ache. But he had no real right to feel that way, and he knew it. You weren't together, you weren't a couple. You had no idea Bucky felt this way about you, and that was his fault.
In the past, he would have had the confidence to walk up to you and tell you, but now, it seemed harder, almost impossible at times. Even with someone like you. Someone he knew inside and out. He could be happy with you. He could be comfortable, and safe. But did he deserve it yet?
"Bucky. BUCKY."
Bucky almost jumped at the loud voice in his ear. "What?" He asked with an aggravated whisper.
"Damn man, did you hear anything I said?" Sam's voice came through the comm again, obviously annoyed.
"No, I was busy."
"Yeah, busy burning holes into Y/n's head."
Bucky felt a chill run up his spine, and his ears heat up. Looking around with just his eyes, he finally spotted Sam across the building on an upper floor, leaning against the rail, looking down at him. He could clearly see the smirk on his face.
"I'm making sure he doesn't make us." Another lie.
"Yeah, right. You better hope he doesn't see the way you're staring, or he will make us."
"Shut up." Buck grumbled.
"Get up here man. You can stare at Y/n later."
Bucky rolled his eyes as he moved towards the stairs. Allowing himself to look back at you, he felt a small jolt run through him as his eyes met yours. You were watching him. Did you turn your ear comms back on? You didn't here that right? No, you took your comms off entirely, just in case. He felt a wave of relief wash over him.
As the target was distracted by a server, you spared a small smile, and a nod at Bucky. Returning the gesture, he let out a deep breath as he made his way to Sam.
He couldn't keep doing this. Thinking of you like this, wanting you to be his, but knowing you aren't. He needed to do something. He needed to take the chance.
--------- --------- ---------
"Are you alright Bucky?"
Bucky looked over at you, as your voice broke him from his thoughts. You were looking at him with a concerned look.
He cleared his throat "Uhm, yeah, why?"
"You've been super quiet ever since we got back from the mission."
Bucky looked ahead of you, he had decided to walk you to your car, with the determined though to ask you on a date before you left. But now, as your car grew closer and closer, he felt his confidence begin to falter.
"Uh, yeah, I just...got a lot on my mind."
"Anything I can help with?" You offered with a soft smile, making Bucky's heart palpitate.
You were now standing near your car, and you purposefully slowed down, hoping Bucky would open up a bit. You heard him take in a sharp breath as he stepped in front of you, facing you and leaning his arm on your car.
"I-I, uh."
You saw him shake his head a bit in frustration. You stepped closer, and leaned against your car. "Buck, what's going on?"
A small smile crossed his face as he let out a soft laugh. "I used to be good at this you know."
"Good at what?" You asked softly, your own heart picking up pace.
He met your eyes cautiously, and still held a soft smile on his face. He was clearly nervous as he spoke. "Asking people on dates."
You felt your heart leap, as your neck and ears felt hot. You bit your lip a bit as you repressed a grin. "You're trying to ask me on a date?"
"Trying, being the operative word, yeah." He lowered his head a bit as an almost embarrassed smile crossed his face. "I've been wanting to ask you for a while. I just- I've never met anyone that has made me feel this way. So I guess it scared me, in a way."
Your heart swelled in your chest as he spoke. "I'd love too."
Bucky's head shot up, "You would?"
You giggled softly. "Of course I would."
It seemed to Bucky, that for the first time, he was seeing how you looked at him. He was always so preoccupied with looking at you, thinking of you, how he felt about you, that he never really paid attention to how you looked at him. But now, it hit him, that the way you were looking at him, a smile on your face, eyes lit up. That you were looking at him, the same way he looks at you.
A smile stretched along is face as he spoke softly. "Great. I- uh, tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow's good."
"Alright. I'll text you the time okay?"
"Is that your subtle way of saying you didn't think past this point?"
He let out a laugh. "Yeah, maybe" he nodded.
You giggled. "Alright, text me. I'll be ready."
Bucky stepped back as you unlocked your car. He pulled the door open for you, and as you began to get in, you stopped and looked back at him. He stared at you expectantly, waiting for you to say something.
As you quickly leaned forward, and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, he felt his body freeze for a moment. "See you tomorrow."
Coming back to his senses, he closed the door as you settled in your seat.
Bucky smiled and waved at you as you began to leave. His heart was beating so heavily in his chest it was almost hard to breath. His thoughts were so preoccupied, he didn't realize that he had probably one of the biggest smiles on his face in years.
"Tomorrow." He whispered softly to himself.
Suddenly realization began to seep in. Tomorrow. And he had nothing planned. You were right, he didn't think past this point.
"Shit."
Thinking abut the possibilities, he realized he didn't know the area well enough, he'd have to do research. Or, he could ask Sam. No, maybe not. He'd think of something. Something amazing, he'd sweep you off your feet.
Hopefully.
xx End xx
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My Wingman 💋| Joaquin Torres Marvel Headcanon
Link to my marvel Masterlist
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Joaquin Torres crushing on an avenger would look like:
Just shortly before the Ultron drama, you were a young recruit to the avengers after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Unbeknownst to the team—especially Natasha—you were a former Black Widow who escaped the red room during a mission and defected to the U.S. before Dreykov could track you. Because the Red Room was constantly moving, you were clueless to where it could have gone and for your protection Fury had your identity changed and record concealed from the rest of the organization. This of course had people wary and suspicious of you—considering you were exceptional in the field—but you kept a low profile and did whatever Fury asked of you. He promised to inform you if the Red Room every came on their radar and vowed to help you take it down when the time came.
Unfortunately that promise would not happen with the implementation of the Sokovia Accords. Fury was off the grid, and your teammates were at odds with one another. Though you verbally remained neutral and did not physically get involved when the fight in Germany occurred, behind the scenes you were supportive of Steve and became close with him and Sam. You finally went rogue at 17 when Natasha confronted you after she discovered your identity and the fact the Red Room was still active. “Fury knew didn’t he? This whole time—you both knew Dreykov was still out there!” “It’s more complicated than you think, Natasha. I was barely fourteen when I escaped and had no where else to go! Fury did what he had to protect me. We both have tried tracking the Red Room but have gotten no leads.” “Well I have one. So let’s go end this once and for all.”
Together you two took down Dreykov with the help of her adoptive family before ultimately meeting up with Steve to break the others out of the Raft. For two years you went on the run. Then in 2018 you all were called to battle against the Mad Titan, Thanos, where you lost half of the population when he succeeded in his mission. For five years you and Natasha remained at the compound, doing whatever you could to maintain the Avengers. And when the opportunity came to fix it all, you were left heartbroken at the loss of her and Tony.
Sam took you under his wing (pun intended) when you and the other former fugitives received pardons. Steve was gone, the Avengers were not so much an active organization anymore, and the Accords had been abolished. You pretty much became a government agent again—with your true identity now that Dreykov was long gone. Every agency wanted you; FBI, CIA, Homeland Security, OSI, the Secret Service, even the goddamn Marshals were calling you to be one of their operatives. “Have you decided whose badge you’ll wear yet?” “I’ve pretty much narrowed it down to either the CIA or OSI. Ross is with the CIA so that’s a plus, but with OSI I could work with you when you’re off with the Air Force. Honestly, Sam, I feel like just becoming a free lance so I can get a taste of everything.”
In the end, you did become a free lance agent under the code name ‘Red Widow,’ as not to be confused with Natasha since she was always known as THE Black Widow. You wore a similar suit she did, except yours was red and the hourglass on the belt was black. You enjoyed being a free lance agent where you got to be flexible with what you did. But boy was it fucking hell at times. One week you’re escorting the President, the next you’re investigating a potential threat to the country, and (like most times) you’re partnering with Sam when he finds himself in a pickle. It’s on one of those many adventures with Sam that you meet First Lieutenant Joaquin Torres.
After the threatening phone call from Karlie, Sam had called you and you immediately sent a team of agents to protect his sister & nephews before getting on a plane to Riga. It was not even a second after you landed that you received dozens of phone calls, emails, texts, and news notifications about what took place in the middle of a crowded area between John Walker and a member of the Flag Smashers. You pretty much hauled ass to the location when you finally got a hold of Sam—and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel satisfaction at being the one to cuff Walker and escort him to the SUV.
Finally you find your friends, running into Bucky on his way out where you two exchanged words on what he was about to do. “Need me to get in touch with Okoye for you?” “I’m already on it—don’t worry about me.” After saying goodbye you entered the doorway to see Sam and a young Air Force Officer chatting. “Hope I’m not interrupting.” “You’re right on time, Red.” Your voice had the officer, who had his back to you, spinning around to which he froze when y’all made eye contact. First thing you thought was, ‘Damn he’s a cutie.’
Joaquin was practically smitten upon first glance. There was a light blush to his cheeks when he unconsciously checked you as you strutted up to the pair in your eye catching Red Widow suit. When Sam introduced him, the man couldn’t even find his voice, “Uh-Uh hi. I-I’m Torres—Joa-Joaquin Torres.” Sam looked amused, as did you, “Nice to meet you, Joaquin. I’ve got many names, but you can call me Y/n or Red.” Your wink at the end pretty much sealed the deal, Joaquin thinking, ‘Oh yeah, I’m screwed.”
Anytime Sam called you after that Joaquin would silently looking forward to seeing you. He thought you were absolutely beautiful, funny, intelligent, and a complete badass. The first time he saw you in action the man was rendered speechless. Of course he knew who you were (after restoring the population, you and the remaining avengers were international heroes) so Joaquin was pretty much a fanboy (if you know you know 😉). Seeing you take down ten men twice your size in the flesh was something he literally bragged to his squadron about for days.
You were well aware of the little crush Joaquin had on you. And to be honest, you shared the feeling. The first time you saw him you thought he was adorable with his cute smile and blushing cheeks (not to mention he looked damn good in uniform). Anytime Sam called you up and Joaquin was there, you couldn’t pass on the opportunity to flirt with him. “Nice to see your pretty face again, Torres.” “I heard that Sam gave you his old wings…have you decided what to do with them? I could use a wingman now that Sam is off being Captain America and hardly needs me anymore.”
Something about you implying you’d want him as a wingman motivated Joaquin to finish fixing up the wings he had already started working on. It excited him to work with you from behind the scenes, but he was itching to get in the air/on the ground and be an asset alongside you. Sam could tell what his goal was, so the older man slowly took Joaquin under his wing like he did you to help prepare him for the superhero life.
When it finally came time for Joaquin to join in on the action, he became your eyes in the sky while you scouted the ground. The Air Force was pretty much your main employer (similar to Sam) but you still did work for other agencies. And since you and Joaquin worked so well together, it was no surprise you’d call him up for help. He was your wingman after all. Not too long after, you two were a team sought after by the many agencies you did free lance work for. “Damn that’s the third mission this month! Don’t you ever get tired of this sometimes?” “Everyday, but I gotta keep the bills paid, pretty boy.”
Your friendship was very flirtatious. People often thought you two were a thing and were surprised to find out they were wrong. You teased and bickered, gave little glances when the other wasn’t looking and complimented each other. His name in your phone was literally ‘pretty boy💋’ and yours was either ‘muñeca🧸’ (doll) or ‘hermosa🥰’ (beautiful). Each time y’all would call the other the pet names, you’d both blush. The crushes on each other definitely increased with each flirtatious remark.
“Damn girl, you know how to make an entrance.” “Wait don’t go yet, let me commit your face to memory in case I die out there.”
“Imma need you to focus, Torres. I know I’m exceptional to look at, but I don’t want that pretty face of yours getting hurt because you’re distracted.” “If you die out there, who’s gonna dance with me at next months officers ball?”
It would be a good time before Joaquin finally worked up the courage to ask you out. As much as he liked you, there was the fear it would ruin the friendship y’all had created. Joaquin admired you from afar and would brush aside his feelings when it came time to business, but at the end of the day there was no denying he wished for something more. At one point Sam even brought it up, wondering why he hadn’t made a move. “It’s complicated, Sam. She’s my wingman and I’d hate to lose her.” “Torres, I see the way she looks at you. Have you ever noticed she never flirts with anyone else when we go out. At banquets people hit on her, but her eyes are only on you. Trust me, she wants the same thing as you.”
Although Sam’s words made him confident, Joaquin was still anxious it wouldn’t work. So he continued to harbor his crush on you from behind the scenes. Finally you had enough and decided to take matters into your own hands after a mission. It had been nearly a year since y’all met and quite frankly your feelings for Joaquin were starting to become overwhelming. “Are we gonna dance around this forever, Torres? Or, am I gonna have to drag you to the bar to have a drink with me and kick this off once and for all?”
At his incredulous expression, you walked up with your hands coming to his collar to pulled him toward you. That finally had him snap out of his daze, face red by how flustered he was. But within his expression was joy and awe, “I-uh. Are you sure, y/n? I care about you so much a-and I know I’ve made my crush on you painfully obvious b-but I-I don’t wanna ruin what we have—.” “Joaquin, you’ll always be my wingman because I trust you more than anyone else on this planet. The fact you are blind to see I feel the same about is both shocking and adorable. I want you to be my wingman both on and off the field in a more personal manner. So what do you say?”
Let’s just say, the kiss you received was him a great answer.
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fleurdelouvemonth · 5 months
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2023 Fleur de Louve (SarahBucky) Ship Month Prompts
This is collaboration with the original announcement post.
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Below you'll find a transcript of all the prompts for this year's ship month event! (For those who couldn't see it on the original image.) It's a mix of dialogue, subject, AU, and seasonal prompts. We tried to be versatile this year, so we hope you like them.
Don't be shy! Late comers are welcome, and late submissions are welcome as well. None of these have to be completed in order the day of/day before.
All that we ask is, if you like this ship and want to see more, then join us in the fun! No submission will be turned away.
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Week 1: Food Prompts (Nov. 1 to 5)
Halloween Candy
Sweet Potato Pie
Pumpkin
Chai tea
Soup
Week 2: Dialogue Prompts (Nov. 6 to 12)
"There's no place like home."
"I think it looks nice."
"Tell me a story." "I don't know any stories."
"You've got leaves in your hair."
"I love you, but you have the worse poker face I've ever seen."
"Do that again."
"Would you like to dance?"
Week 3: AU Prompts (Nov. 13 to 19)
Celebrity/Bodyguard AU
Coffee Shop/Bakery AU
College Professors AU
Space AU
Tattoo Parlor/Flower Shop AU
Med School/Doctors AU
Mermaid/Pirates AU
Week 4: Seasonal Prompts (Nov. 20 to 26)
Falling leaves
Chilly mornings
Apple picking
Football game
Gratitude
Sweaters
Family dinner
Week 5: Tropes Prompts (Nov. 27 to 30)
They were roommates
Friends-to-lovers
Bed sharing
Found family
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pinkiebieberpie · 2 years
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mob!bucky x inexperienced!reader
bucky moodboards list
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eat-limes-bitches · 2 months
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Love After War
PAIRING: Female Reader x FATWS! Bucky Barnes
SUMMARY: The mind has a way of playing tricks on you, images you thought to be real are just a figment of your past. But how to get back to the present?
WARNINGS: Angst, nightmares, PTSD, panic attack, cannon-level violence, torture, smidgen of fluff at the end
Word Count: 1239
A/N: soooooo this was supposed to be the start of my Febuwhump challenge but with the way my life is going right now I won't be able to finish all the prompts by the end of the month, BUT I will post the ones I have done, and I will keep working on some prompts as well but don't expect them to be in order at all.
Prompt: Helpless
Enjoy! <3
Divider by Rookthorne
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The first thing Bucky realized as he came to was how incredibly cold he was. A shiver wracked his body, causing him to try and pull the flimsy material covering him closer to his skin as water poured down on him. Wait- water? He looked to find the source and realized he was in a shower. The cold water turned red as it ran across his body from all the blood there. Was it his or someone else's? Bucky couldn’t tell. 
“SOLDAT.” A voice boomed from behind, causing him to flinch aggressively. He knew that voice, it was one of his handlers, and by the sound of the rapidly approaching footsteps, he wasn’t happy.
“Poydem s nami, soldat. Dok khochet tebya videt'” The voice growled and Bucky froze. 
His frazzled mind still trying to work out where he was and what was going on. His hesitance must have been seen as resistance because the next thing he knew, a rifle butt was flying towards him. 
Confused, Bucky blocked it with his arm, the clash of metal reverberated around the room causing more handlers to pour in, each one with a gun all pointing in the same direction. His pulse was starting to quicken, and every muscle in his body tensed. 
He was so focused on what was going on in front of him that he didn’t notice the guard coming up behind him with a stun baton. The guard struck, causing Bucky to fall to his knees as he hissed in pain, the electric shock causing his arm to fall limp at his side he clutched the useless appendage in his right hand as he looked on in terror as they all started moving in on him. Two of the guards grabbed him and began to drag him out of the room. He knew where they were taking him and as those rusted double doors came into view he began thrashing as wildly as he could to get away but it was no use.
“Bucky?”
They flung open the doors, his senses on hyperdrive as the blinding lights of the room burned his eyes. Noise. There was so much noise, nurses scrambling around, guards shouting, and doctors preparing for whatever horrible things they had planned for him that day. 
“Bucky!”
He tried to fight against them as they strapped him into the chair, but it was no use, he felt utterly helpless as they began tying him down. His metal arm, although useless, was cuffed in 4 different steel brackets to keep him from moving, the rest of his body bolted into place as the panels of the machine began to lower over his face and just as they were about to connect to his skin-
“JAMES!” 
He sucked in a large breath bolting upright in bed and scrambling far away from where he was until he managed to situate himself in the corner of the room. His chest, slick with sweat heaved up and down as he tried to get oxygen to fill his lungs, but his heart was beating too fast for him to do anything but hyperventilate. There was a quiet sound from the other side of the room that made him realize he wasn’t alone, and he let out a whimper as their footsteps got closer, curling in on himself to appear as small as possible. 
“Bucky?” This voice was soft and full of concern, a complete contrast to the voice he heard just moments ago. This intrigued him slightly, but not enough to make him uncurl himself to see who was speaking to him. There was a sigh from the other person and the floorboards squeaked as they moved their entire weight to the floor, sitting on the ground near him.
“Bucky? It’s me, baby.” The voice cooed gently, and with the next breath he took, the familiar smell of cedar and lavender invaded his senses. He peaked his head out from behind his knees and saw Y/n sitting on the floor looking at him with concern coloring her features and sorrow clouding her eyes. She noticed the small movement and smiled gently as her eyes caught his.
“There he is. Hello, my love.” She whispered, a gentle smile decorating her face. Bucky blinked owlishly at her, still not realizing who he was looking at, but still Y/n smiled. 
Progress she thought before she started speaking again, “It’s just me, love. You are safe. We are in our bedroom, in our apartment, no one is going to hurt you.” 
This made him cock his head to the side before looking around the room. There was no one else besides the two of them. Instead of the gurneys, there was a dresser. Instead of blood-stained floors, there was a soft, grey plush carpet. Instead of that chair, there was a bed, and her. Bucky took a deep breath, finally able to fill his lungs and when he did, his body began to shake. He would shake violently for a moment before his muscles would give out and relax before contracting all over again. Y/n watched him carefully and scooted a little closer. 
“Can I sit next to you?” It was a simple question, and it might seem trivial to ask someone you were just sleeping next to if you could be in their space but it was important for Bucky to feel in control of his situation, if he was in control, he was no longer there.  Bucky looked at her and gave a small nod and Y/n moved to sit next to him, her back plastered against the wall. Although she wasn’t touching him, Bucky could feel the warmth radiation from her body, another piece of proof that he wasn’t in the basement of a bunker in the Siberian mountains. The pair sat in silence for a moment, Y/n watching Bucky, and Bucky staring straight ahead at the wall. Y/n shifted, causing Bucky's eyes to leave the spot on the wall and look at her. 
“Can I touch you?” She asked softly. Buckys hesitated for a moment, before nodding again. Y/n scootched closer to Bucky so that their bodies were pressed against each other and she reached over with a hand and ran her fingers through his shortened chestnut locks. That simple action seemed to bring new life back to Bucky and he began to uncurl, leaning into her touch. Y/n began humming a soft melody as she continued to massage Bucky’s scalp. His tremors became less and less until they were all but gone. 
After some more time passed, Bucky wasn’t sure how much, Y/n stopped and gently stood up, offering her hand to him. 
“‘C'mon love, let’s get back in bed. Your back isn’t going to thank you if I let you sleep in the corner.” 
Bucky placed his hand in hers and allowed her to lead him back to bed. Y/n folded back the covers in a more orderly fashion before sliding under the soft grey sheets, motioning for Bucky to do the same. He did so, snuggling back into Y/n’s side listening to her steady heartbeat, reassuring him that he was safe.  She began humming that soft melody again. Feeling warm and safe, his eyes grew heavy and he fell into a dreamless sleep. The last thing he remembered was the whisper of an “I love you,” in his ear.
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mayfieldss · 1 year
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hello, i’ve never really requested anything before so i’m sorry if i’m unclear or if i mess something up.
i was wondering if you could do a Bucky one-shot where the reader is on the thinner side, meaning she didn’t have any bold curves, instead her curves are on the softer side and not all that visible. she has small boobs and a small ass, and her body is something she is very insecure about, she never really liked being flat.
the setting could be at a party or wherever you choose, but basically reader sees Bucky talking to some woman at a party (reader and Bucky are dating) and the womans body is everything the reader wished her body was like. the woman had bold curves, big boobs and a big ass. reader got a bit self-conscious after seeing Bucky talk to the woman, and started feeling that maybe Bucky would be more attracted to her if she was more curvier and not as flat as she was.
when they get back from the party (or wherever you decide) Bucky can tell that something is bothering reader, as she doesn’t talk to him the whole car ride back, and seems down all of a sudden.
once they get back into their apartment, Bucky asks reader what’s wrong and at first she won’t tell him but eventually he gets it out of her. she admits everything, all of her insecurities about her body and how she felt when she saw her with that woman.
you can make it a bit a gary and i would prefer a smutty ending :))
I'm not sure what "a bit a gary" means, and as this is a sfw blog, I do not write smut, but the rest of your request is below.
Body - Bucky Barnes
Content warnings; body dysmorphia descriptions, self-doubt, and language, alcohol consumption.
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You'd always been flat. No curves or bumps to speak of, nothing that you thought fit your definition of a 'sexy' body type. You were pretty, but you'd never been fond of the way your body was shaped. It drove you crazy every time you made your way past a woman with an hourglass figure or someone with an ass that was visible. Yet you had a wonderful boyfriend that would die for you and your body. But after all of the time you'd spent with him, all of the loved he'd shared with you, you still felt unworthy.
The night had started simple, and when you walked into the Avengers tower, the place bustling with people holding drinks and mingling with plenty of strangers, everything felt all right. Bucky was with you, an arm around your waist as you moved through the people to the bar. That's when things started to take a turn for the worst. Of course, Tony Stark had ordered the prettiest women around to serve drinks, and as you approached the bar a goddess of a woman appeared before you. She was everything you were not, and you swore Bucky's eyes lingered on her more than they ever had you. That got you overthinking. You analysed the woman, her body was curvy, shaped in what you deemed to be a perfect way, and God, her face was to die for. It killed you to sit down at the bar before the woman, where anyone walking past was free to see the comparison of your two beings so close to each other. Bucky was beside you, and whilst he sat with his hand on your thigh, squeezing it gently as he ordered drinks, his affection felt like nothing. The other woman was all you could focus on. Was he looking at her? Did he see the differences between you and the woman behind the bar? Did he think he may have settled for less when he looked at you now?
"Earth to Y/N." Bucky's voice pulls you back to reality and you turn away from the lady to face him. His eyes hold concern, and he shuffles his bar stool closer to yours, your knee brushing against his. "You okay, honey?" His voice is so sweet, and it kills you to think you could lose him to someone else.
"Yeah, I'm good." The words come as a mumble, panicked and disoriented as you continue to think about your relationship falling apart over something so simple as your body type. Bucky doesn't believe you in the slightest, leaning in closer to you.
"We can get out of here if you want, I don't like this place that much either." He smiles as he whispers the words against your ear, not that he has to whisper. The party is loud enough that no one would hear anything outside of the music and their own shouted conversations, but he does it just to be a flirt.
"No, it's okay. I'm fine, really." You place a hand on his arm and turn back to the bar, ordering as you try not to focus on the woman making your drink. She's mesmerising and you just can't stop staring. Fear races through you though, when Bucky speaks, addressing the stunning figure behind the bar with a smile.
"Kind of loud here, isn't it?" The woman laughs at his half-question, and it absolutely guts you to think Bucky would leave you for someone like her, though you wouldn't be surprised in the slightest.
"Yeah, but parties always are." It's the woman's response, and she begins cleaning a glass. How she does such a simple task in such a sexy manner you don't know, but when you glance at Bucky, he's looking at her, and not you. He's not looking at you and you doubt he'll even want to after this party.
You stand from your stool, taking your drink with you and leaving Bucky behind for the time being. You can't deal with your overwhelming thoughts concerning your self-worth right now, and would much prefer to get drunk somewhere else, away from the comparison of other appealing people. When you're walking through the crowds, however, it seems to get worse. You're faced with plenty of other women that look so perfect under the dimmed lights of the party, and you really don't need that right now. It's killing you, and you race to the bathroom, not willing to confront the issues that lie before you. You sit in there for a while, thinking over everything and sipping slowly at your drink, waiting for the energy of the party to pass. You know it won't. It's a Stark party after all, and they can go on for days.
"Hey, you in there?" The voice is one you recognise, followed by two firm knocks on the wood of the bathroom door. Bucky stands outside it, and for a moment you think about staying silent, letting him move on and leave you in peace, but you do still love him.
"Yeah." you place your drink down on the sink, propping yourself up on the edge of the bathtub when Bucky calls to you again. His voice is sweet, trustworthy, but you can't help but think of the bartender once more, stealing his attention.
"Can I come in?" He's leaning against the door, shoulder pressed to it as he waits, and when you finally unlock it, turning the nob, Bucky lets out a sigh of relief.
"What're doing hiding out in here, baby?" He closes the door behind him when he enters, watching as you move back to sit on the edge of the tub. He follows suit, though he kneels in front of you, taking your hands in his.
"I just don't want to be here right now." You feel bad saying it because you don't want Bucky to feel as though he has to leave with you if he's having a good time, but as much as you hate to admit it you don't want him with all these pretty girls either.
"I hate it here too." his response isn't a surprise to you, though you don't know if it's true. He seemed pretty comfortable at the bar after all. "D'you wanna get outta here?" he squeezes your hand and for a second you can believe you still might be what he's looking for. You nod, despite your raging thoughts, and in the next few minutes you've made it out of the party and into the cool night air of New York. It makes you feel better, the freedom of being outside, but you're cramped in with your feelings again on the car ride home with Bucky beside you. You don't say anything to him about the bartender because you don't know how to broach the subject without seeming clingy and jealous. It's never worked out for you when you've tried to talk about your insecurities with past boyfriends and you think that might be what's holding you back. That and the fact that Bucky might dump you for someone with a different body type now that he's seen what he's missing.
When you pull up at your place, everything seems different. The front steps, the door, the way your keys jingle in the lock. It all seems heavier, more threatening, and when you make it to your couch, flopping down and taking off your shoes, you still can't relax.
"Hey, what's going on with you?" Bucky stands in the kitchen, eyes locked on your figure as he removes his gloves, which he still feels the need to wear in public settings.
"Nothing. Nothing's going on." You try to be convincing, but the way you say it is anything but and soon Bucky is approaching you slowly, as if afraid that he'll make it worse.
"You sure? Because you seem a little on edge right now." When you look at him his eyes scream concern, and you hate that you're making him feel that way, but he doesn't know exactly how he's making you feel either. "D'you wanna talk about it?" His words are gentle and sweet and as much as you want to spill all your feelings out for him to interpret, you can't bring yourself to do it.
"I'm fine Bucky, I'm going to bed." And so, you do. You stand, walking to your bedroom as quickly as possible. It just pisses you off more, however, when you're getting ready to sleep because taking your dress off isn't an issue. And even though that's great in some aspects, you wish it wasn't as easy. You wanted to have to peel your dress over your body shape, not just have it fall to the floor once the zip comes undone. But you suppose it helps in this scenario as you race to put on your pajamas and hop into bed before Bucky can catch you to talk. You weren't fast enough though and Bucky entered the room just as you'd finished dressing yourself.
"We're gonna talk about this." It isn't a question or an offer but rather a statement as Bucky comes up behind you, turning you to look at him. "What's going on?"
Somehow that gets to you, and in the next moment you find your emotions boiling up. It's like an explosion of all your thoughts in just a few sentences and Bucky stands there in wait for you to finish.
"Do you wish I was curvier? Do you wish I wasn't as flat as I am?"
That's the sentence that causes Bucky to frown, and you actually think that he might be genuinely confused. "What?"
"I saw the way you looked at the lady behind the bar, she was pretty, wasn't she? Is she your type? because I'm really sorry, but I don't look like that." Your voice has raised in the time you've been talking, and Bucky dares to take a step forward, silencing you when he takes your face in his hands.
"I have no idea what you're talking about. You are my type, and honestly, I can't remember what the girl at the bar even looked like. You were all I could focus on." His voice is gentle, and then he's pressing a short kiss to your lips, enveloping you in a hug as you settle down.
"Are you telling me the truth right now?" Your question comes quietly, head against Bucky's shoulder as you wait for his answer. He gives it to you without a second thought.
"When have I ever lied to you?" He sounds so sincere, and you let yourself believe him because that's all you really want to do. At the end of the night, you're the one he went home with, not some other girl and you think that speaks for itself. The pressure of trying to be someone else might get to you, but Bucky does love you and now you're confident in that fact. He hopes you always will be.
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GENERAL TAGLIST: @heliads @candywh0r3 @caplanreadss @hiya-itsamber @s00buwu
MARVEL GENERAL: @mellowladyangel @5kyyy @avyannadawn
BUCKY BARNES TAGLIST: @characters-deserve-better @posteyymaloney @agentsofsheilds @ladyfallonavenger @winter-soldier-vibes @buckys2thicc @justifymyfeelings
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Driving Home to Bucky After A Long Day
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x (Gender Neutral) Reader 
Word Count: 1.3k
TW: None 
AN: Just a short but sweet one shot about our favorite boy. This has sat in my google docs for a ass time so I hope you all enjoy! Okay, mags out!
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It’s been a long day. Too long for it to only be a Wednesday. You're having to work late because one of your colleagues fucked up some paperwork after a mission that you now need to fix. Your boss is nice enough to ask if you need dinner orders but you tell them no and you'll eat when you get home. “Fucking Sara, how do you screw up a goddamn injury form this badly” you groan, filling out anther claim made by our colleague. 
Finally, after around 3 hours past your usual shift, you're able to leave for Buck's. You look out the window and the rain has only gotten heavier on the cold November night. It’s pitch black out apart from city lights and cars that drove past. You shut down your computer, grab your coat and start to head out. In the lift, you message Bucky letting him know you're finally on the way home. It's almost 8pm. 
You run to your car, holding your jacket over your head to not get too wet. You sit there for a few minutes to let out a deep sigh and release some stress that you'd been holding. Starting up your car, you turn on the heating and connect your phone up to the Bluetooth. Songs that remind you of Bucky start to play, a feeling of ease finally washes over you as you pull out of the parking lot. 
Traffic in Brooklyn is brutal, the journey home taking far longer than you'd like it to. The lights of other cars slowly strained your tired eyes. The yells and noise of the city deafened by the music playing through the speaker. Your clothes and hair slowly dry as you drive, wondering how much longer the journey will take.
Pulling up to Bucky's apartment, you turn off the car and lie back on the seat for a second. Almost steadying the tiredness and stress from the day before you venture into the apartment complex. The area isn't the nicest but it's near where he grew up. A rough blue eyed boy from Brooklyn who deserved the world waiting for you to come home to him. Mentally cursing how many stairs you'll have to climb since the lift is out of order. 
Entering the building, the dusty smell of the cold building is a stark contrast to the cold November air outside. The climb up the stairs felt like an eternity, the walls getting progressively dirtier as you climb each flight. Standing outside the door of Buck’s apartment at last, you slowly open the door to the dimly lit home. 
Bucky's apartment wasn't much. He rented it when it was just himself living there, not taking into account meeting you or the fact he deserved more than just four dingy walls. Parts of you linger in each room, a daily reminder that you’re real and not just part of some sick dream. That you're really with him, not planning to leave any time soon. 
From the toothbrush in the bathroom; to the extra blankets and cushions you bought for the living room so the leather of the beat up old sofa wouldn't stick to your skin after hours of watching TV together cuddled up. Fairy lights hung up in the bedroom and living room, a fond memory from when you put them up at Christmas the year before but never took them down since you thought they looked pretty. He couldn't help agreeing, saying they looked beautiful as he stared at you rather than the yellow lights decorating the walls. 
The small kitchen held home to kitchenware that you bought once you found out he only had two pots and a frying pan for pancakes. A cheesy apron hung up on the edge of the door that had "Kiss the Cook'' on the front, a joke gift that a friend of yours bought you for your birthday. 
Though the apartment was small and there was barely enough room to move in it, he wouldn't change it for the world. His room didn't have a door to separate it from the living room and sure, the heating didn't work half the time and don't get him started on the guy on the 2nd floor who flirts with you every time he runs into you....he wouldn't change it one bit of it meant a life without you. 
Walking through the door, the smell of cinnamon, leather and dust washed over you. A warm welcoming smell that always felt like home to you. He always seemed to smell like old leather, pine and something sweet that you couldn't quite put your finger on. You took off your shoes and called out to Bucky as you put down your bag and jacket on the small side table that was next to the front door. 
You looked around for Bucky as you walked in. The kitchen island was tidy for once and the wooden floor had been mopped. 'Must have cleaned while I was out' you thought as you walked towards the sofa in the middle of the living room. An old Friends rerun playing on the TV again. 
Buck walks out from the bathroom in a t-shirt and a pair of tracksuit bottoms, looking freshly showered with his wet hair sticking to his forehead. He comes over with a smile on his face, eyes still the brightest blue you'd ever seen, and envelopes you in a hug. He asks how work was as he leaves a kiss on your forehead. You explain your day before quickly heading off to change out of your work attire.
After changing and finally feeling comfortable again, you walk into the living room. The main lights had been turned off, the fairy lights from Christmas were turning the room a warm and cosy yellow. Some candles were lit on the kitchen island and on the TV stand as some soft music played in the background. You laugh a little as you walk over to him. Sat on the sofa, Bucky smiles at you, knowing how hard today must have been.
"Long day?" He asked. "God, don’t get me started” Buck stood up from the sofa, making is way to the middle of the small living room and placed a hand on your lower back and slowly pulled you in for a kiss. “I would gladly have rather spent the day here”. Buck let out a small breathy laugh, “well you’re here now” he says, almost whispering as if was trying to convince himself you were real. 
“How'd you do this all while I was getting changed? I was only in there for like 5 minutes, Buck". He takes your hands in his as Louis Armstrong starts to play through the speaker. "I may have planned this out a bit before you got home. Plus, food has been ordered. Got your favorite" He said with that same sweet smile he always gives you. Even though your tired, that damn Bucky Barnes Charm is irresistible. 
“Wow look at you go, ordering food from your phone” He scoffs sarcastically. “Hey, I am perfectly capable ordering from the phone, it’s not rocket science” You laugh, resting your forehead against his. “I know, I’m only joking old man”. 
He pulls you close and starts to sway to the music. The windows open slightly let in the light noise of rain and that ambiance of the city outside. It all adds to the small bubble the two of you had made in the apartment. The song changes to Can't Help Falling In Love With You as he places another kiss on your forehead. 
"I love yah, Doll. You know that right?" You turn your head to face him. The swaying stops and his hands rest on your waist. His face, dimly lit by the fairy lights and candles. "I know, I love you too Buck. Always have, always will". The two of you go back to softly swaying to the music, wrapped in each others warmth. Feeling safe in the world for a moment. 
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frostironfudge · 2 years
Note
🎟 mini movie theatre
Bucky being grumpy coz it’s been 3 days since he has eaten you out coz you get so excited and turned on and skips foreplay.but now he’s had enough🫣😂
A Taste Of You
Summary: this is part of my funfair celebration under the 'mini movie theatre' category and well making bucky wait is the absolute worse you can do to him.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 1.6k || Dividers: @firefly-graphics
Warnings: bucky barnes, filth, smut, oral fem receiving, praise kink, clothes being ripped, dom sub kinda dynamic?, dom bucky, feral bucky, just bucky is a warning.
A.N: ma'am you're making me sin and simp for this man too much. i absolutely love it.
Main Masterlist || frostironfudge's funfair masterlist
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Bucky huffs at your message, annoyance radiates through him. 
Your flight was delayed, which meant it would be pushing to the three day mark.
Three days without holding you. 
Three days without hearing your laugh in the same room as him.
Three days without your kisses.
Three days without his head being buried between your thighs.
That last thought had him ebbing towards annoyance. He licks his lips and before his actual brain can catch up, his not-so-little brain is typing out the message and sending it.
Bucky: Get all the rest you need on the flight and at the layover, you won’t be able to get out of bed once you’re here.
When his actual brain reads the message again, it agrees. You made him like this, addicted to you. Addicted to your heart, mind, lips, body, the way he felt every shiver when his hands would trace upon your skin.
The way your heart would beat erratically as he guided your hips over his own when you would straddle him.
Your soft needy, whimpers when he would taste you, tongue buried deep, devouring at your entrance, sucking on your clit.
Just the remembrance of you under him had him hard and his tongue moving over his lips as though to collect the remnants of your orgasm, just a taste more before he would devour you again, then sheath himself in your warmth.
Moaning your name, praising you for taking every bit of him. Praising you for being so good. Watching your skin flush and wetness grow at his words. Whispering the filth that would not end until you came for him undone with the softest of caresses.
He thinks back to the night before your flight, he was eager to have the taste of you upon his tongue. Allowing him to carry you through his days without you. However, to his delight and disdain you wanted him to stretch you apart. Fuck you, fill you up.
Who was Bucky to deny your mewls and pleas?
He remembers how your skin tasted, a mix of sweat, your lotion’s fragrance lingering lightly, your scent, your arousal, him all mixed into this hedonistic combination. He stayed buried in the sheets after he dropped you to the airport.
His cock sends a painful burn through him, he knew thinking of you in this way was painful. Because the only respite for you came from you. He would be damned if he let you have your way tonight.
He smirks at your reply, a teasing image of you wearing lingerie you purchased while on the trip, no doubt your best friends pushed you for it, he’s grateful. The colour of the lace against your skin, the way the material hugged your form, Bucky wanted to rip it off but also leave it on.
He responds with his predicament, you laugh reading the message.
You: I can offer the solution when I land.
Bucky:  tease.
You: as if you aren’t.
Bucky:  oh sweetheart, you’re in for a treat tonight.
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Bucky stands back from the crowd at the arrival gate, even at one in the morning there was no shortage, he spots you as you search for him in the scarcer occupied areas. Your gaze meets his and the smile that graces your face warms his heart. 
He begins to move towards you and you to him. Almost like magnets approaching. Your luggage trolley half abandoned and you bound the last few steps to him, Bucky lifts you up, your legs wrap around him and his forehead rests against your own.
“I missed you.” He confesses, his words breathless because his chest stops aching, because you’re back in his arms, back to him.
“I missed you too.” You whisper against his lips your own voice uneven, your lips meet his own.
You can feel the slightly raised portion from where he probably gnawed at it nervously, he hisses into your mouth as you tug upon the very portion. Bucky’s hand moves along your back drawing you closer as his tongue moves against yours, he allows you to part from him to breathe.
“I have two.” You murmur, his brows furrow, then his blue eyes sparkle, as his pupils widen at the prospect.
“Good, because I have decided to rip it off of you.” He promises, setting you down to walk back to the car.
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Bucky sits on the bed, clad only in his boxers, he could hear you putting on the lace in the bathroom. He had half a mind to barge in and rip it off. He decided to keep his patience for a while more. 
He could almost taste his reward. 
When you step out, your gaze on the floor and then towards him. His lips part as his eyes map out every inch of you. 
“Fuck, sweetheart.” He breathes, sitting up, you move to the bed, straddling him. A low moan as your cunt sits right upon his hardened cock.
“You’re so fucking gorgeous. All mine.” His hands move from your hips to your breasts, your nipples hardened against the fabric as he explores your skin.
Bucky’s vibranium fingers move around the hem of the fabric, teasing your nipples with the slightest of touches. You arch your back, grinding down as the tendrils of pleasure deep into you from your clit.
“Can feel you soaking my cock right through this fabric, pretty girl.” He whispers, rolling your left nipple and his lips trace over your neck. You preen.
“So wet for me? Did you think about my cock while you were gone? About my tongue?” He lowers the lace, your head thrown back as he takes one nipple into his mouth. He lets go and blows upon it, you grind down harder against him.
He takes your other nipple into his mouth, biting down upon it, your hands have a mind of their own moving towards his waistband to free his cock.
“Bucky—,” Your eyes widen when he grabs your hands, turning so you’re under him.
“I thought today, today she will be patient.” He shakes his head, your brows furrow.
“I thought—,”
“I only want moans coming out of that mouth.” He instructs, then your hear the fabric of the panties tear, cold air against your aching core has you shiver, Bucky pushes you down as he moves between your thighs. 
“Buck—,” Your plea to him is cut off as his tongue moves over your folds and he moans at your taste. 
“So fucking pretty, all for me.” He praises, lips latching onto your clit, he sucks upon it, sending jolts through you. 
Your thighs clench and he only hums in pleasure as you moan his name wanton with need for more. 
His index finger traces over your entrance, slowly sinking in, you clench around his finger. 
“So eager.” A second finger added, you clench your thighs again, as a warning for his fingers to not retreat out. 
But Bucky smirks, as you clench around nothing, your eyes find his glistening fingers as he sucks upon them. 
“Going to eat you out so good.” His fingers pump in and out at a slow pace, the way his teeth slightly tug on your clit you cry out, fingers finding his hair. 
Pulling him closer and pushing him away when his stimulus is too much. 
Bucky takes his sweet time, increasing and decreasing his pace as he pleases, he loves the way your thighs clench and you try to close them when his movements become too much. 
He keeps edging you, smirking when you become a mess of his moans and letting him know how close you are, tears spring to your eyes as three of his fingers are inside you, they fill you up. You meet the thrusts with movements of your hips. 
His tongue languid, leisurely sending sparks of pleasure to your clit. His vibranium thumb circles around your clit, your slick drips down to his palm. The cold mixed with the heat building in your abdomen. 
“Bucky please, please—,” you beg, his movements pick up pace and you shake as your orgasm finally crashes into you. Bliss carrying you and the aftershocks aggravated by his continued circles on your clit. 
You tug on his hair, waiting to taste yourself on his lips, he always enjoyed showing you how much he relished devouring you. 
His fingers pause inside you as he meets your lips. You moan into his mouth. 
He begins to move his fingers again, you part away from his lips as they attach to your neck, sucking on the spot the draws the prettiest moans from you. 
“Bucky, please, need you.” You beg, your hand wrapping around his bicep. 
“Oh no sweetheart, it has been more than four days since I have tasted you. I’m absolutely hungry, and you’re the most decadent treat for me. So go on spread those pretty legs, tangle those sweet fingers in my hair. You aren’t going anywhere till I’m full. Then maybe, maybe I will fill you up too.” He places a soft kiss to your jaw, parting your thighs again. 
His eyes are only a thin ring of blue as he admires your arousal only increasing for him. 
“See, she wants me to have my full.” He smirks, your clit pulses in anticipation. 
His lips wrap around your clit, his fingers brush over the spot that he knows like the back of his own hand. 
“Moan for me sweetheart, need to hear you fall apart for me.” He hums in delight as his fingers circle over the spot inside you, your moans reach his ears. 
He smirks against you clit, yeah he was definitely rewarded for his patience. 
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permanent tags: @stevesmewmew @pandaxnienke
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