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harrysgoldenline · 3 years

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When In Italy Part 4

here is part 4! Um this chapter has bad words and some adult themes so warning for that! The next part will be the last, so let me know what you think! Are they end game or no? Also! If you want a personalized imagine, check out my pinned post! If you want to support me ---> please click here! every little bit helps bc im a broke ass college student so thank u to anyone who wants to support me :)

All comments and feedback are welcome and encouraged!! :)

WORD COUNT: 2.2K

You stood frozen as he stepped out of the elevator, his eyes soft as he met yours, waking towards you.

“Get away from me.” you whisper, attempting to push past him and get into the elevator, pressing the door closed button before even pressing a floor, not wanting him to get any closer.

“Y/N, wait!” he rushed, sticking his hand between the doors and stopping it, his tall frame standing before you that you quickly push past, going back to lock yourself in your apartment, and lock him out, “Please, let me explai-“

“No!” you stopped, voice firm as you turned to face him, “you can’t keep doing this! you can’t keep showing up like this! So just leave me alone.”

You kept walking, ignoring his pleas as he came after you, successfully unlocking your apartment door rapidly, but you catch a glimpse of rings as he hand stops the door.

“Please.” He whispered, not pushing the door open and you saw a flicker of his eyes and you could almost see the sincerity in them, “I know I don’t deserve it, I really don’t, but I would just love to talk to you for real this time, anything you want to know.”

“and you’re not gonna be an asshole this time?” you asked, leaning against the doorframe, peaking at him, “because if you are, I swear to god Styles I will give you 5 seconds to get the fuck out.”

“Promise.” He nodded and your heart believed him, so you opened the door.

You watched as he shoved his hands deep in his pockets, slowly entering your apartment and you didn’t miss how his eyes scanned you quickly, before bouncing around the apartment, looking around the space he used to be so familiar with.

You watched how he headed to the couch about to sit but stutter stepped a bit, scratching the back of his neck and looking at you, almost asking you if it’s okay if he sits down.

You gave him a soft smile and nod, tucking a loose hair behind your ear and sitting on one side of the couch, thankful he sat on the other, giving you each plenty of space as your eyes met. The tension was slowly rising, looking at each other as you sat, wondering who was going to break the silence.

“I never meant for anything to happen.” he whispered, his head falling as a shameful look covered his face, avoiding your eyes, “After the breakup… I- I was just lost. I was messing up at work and I just was doing shit. Then, it was like only like a month ago, I was getting drunk all the time and she just came into my trailer and we were talking and then she kissed me.”

You just nodded, biting your bottom lip and picking at your nails, peaking up and looking at him, your glossy eyes meeting his bloodshot ones, not really having anything to say in response.

“And I just…” he started, “I wanted to feel better, feel anything. So, we just started hanging out more and I just really wanted to feel something, feel a connection. So we took a trip to Italy because… It’s always been a place that made me feel better and then…”

“Yeah.” you chuckled, “and then… Why did you bring her to our house? I know we haven’t talked about that kind of stuff, but it’s mine too Harry and… just seeing you two there? I never felt more replaceable than I did when I saw you two.”

“Oh love, no.” He whispered, scooting closer to you, a hand coming up to cup your face to help your eyes meet, but he retracted it back before he made contact with your skin, “I’m so, so sorry. I’m so sorry and I will never be able to prove to you, but that was never my intention to ever hurt you. The breakup was a mistake.”

“I… How am I supposed to believe that?” you squeaked, voice cracking as the barrier breaks, tears falling on your cheeks as you looked up at him, “We we’re together for years and you just- I mean fuck Harry! I haven’t even thought about even starting to flirt with someone and you’re…”

“We’ve never had sex,” He quietly added cheeks turning a bit red, “or done anything like that. At all, I just… couldn’t.”

Your eyes widen a bit at the confession, watching as he looked at his hands, a slight twinge of embarrassment on his features.

“Oh.” you whispered, “I know I shouldn’t be mad, we… we aren’t together and you have have the right to do whatever you want but it’s just… hard. Especially when I wasn’t expecting it. I went to Italy to try and get away, everything in the city makes me think of you, I don’t know why I thought staying at the house would be any better but, I just wanted to get away.”

“Sorry I ruined your trip.”

“Sorry I ruined your hookups.”

He let out a laugh, the smile staying a bit longer when he noticed you had subconsciously scooted a bit closer to him.

“It’s not like I ever really wanted to… Even little Harry only wants you.” he flirted and an instant, loud laugh leaves your lips, leaning forward and your brace yourself on his shoulder, a simple thing you had done over the years countless times, but still made his heart skip a beat.

“Oh my god,” you said between breathless laughs, your bodies now less then a foot apart as you smiled up at him, “please do not call it little Harry!”

“What do you prefer?” He smirked, “rather I call it bi-“

“What the fuck?” a voice spoke suddenly, both of your red eyes going to your front door and seeing your best friend standing their, her eyes wide in a mix of confusion and anger. Your hand retracted from his body quickly, your best friend looking at you with soft eyes, her eyes darting over to Harry’s and you see the fiery anger behind them, “Y/N, please tell me he was getting whatever shit he left behind and is leaving.”

“We were just talking.” You started, glancing over at Harry, seeing a bit of fear behind his eyes and your lips quirked up in a smile that quickly faded seeing the anger in y/bff/n eyes.

“What do you want to talk to him about? How he broke your heart again?” She asked, confusion and concern laced in her voice, “I’m sorry, y/n, I just… I can’t watch you go through all of it all over again and again.”

You opened your mouth to protest, but he quickly stood up beside you giving you a quick nod as he glanced over at y/bff/n the back at you, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just showed up. It was so good to see you, y/n, I’ll get out of your way.”

“Harry, wait!” you stood up, hating the softening in your voice, “I want to talk more… are you staying or do you have to go back to L.A?”

“I’ll be here as long as you need me. And if you want me gone, I’ll book my flight. Okay? It’s up to you, whatever you want.”

“Okay… Can I call you later?”

“You can call me anytime, I’ll pick up.”

***

Y/bff/n definitely wasn’t thrilled with you.

“I just feel like this is a bad idea, y/n!” She had exclaimed once Harry had left your apartment, “He’s gonna hurt you again! What could he possibly want?”

“I dont know, I just… I dont know.” You sighed, sitting across from her on your couch just like you did with him, “I love him and I don’t know what’s going to happen but I don’t want to end up hating him.”

She nodded, looking at you as your eyes glazed over again, “Hey, okay, I’m sorry. I just don’t want you upset. Do you still wanna go try this new place or just hang out here? Let’s get your mind off of everything, you need a break, yeah? Especially if you’re going to talk to him later.”

“Do you think I should?"

“If that’s what you think, I think you should. You know him.” She nods, “but I swear to god if he makes you cry again he’ll have to deal with me.”

So now, here you were, waiting on him to come back to finish your talk from earlier. It was helpful hanging out with y/bff/n, listening to her advice as she gave you a bit of the reality check that you needed, making sure he won’t sweep you off your feet with his familiar charm.

Your heart rate never fully calmed down as you waited for him to come back to your apartment after y/bff/n dropped you back off after your afternoon together and you were glad for the few hours of a distraction, but now your mind was fully occupied with him once again as you sat on your couch.

The knock on your door caused you to jump, hoping up and checking your appearance in your hall mirror before swinging open the door, seeing Harry standing their with a bouquet of flowers, a small smile on his face.

“Got these for you,” he began, “shoulda showed up with them when I kinda crashed into you earlier… but I was so nervous I didn’t think about it, honestly.”

“Thank you.” You softly replied, eyeing up at him and taking them from his grip, letting out a shaky breath as you welcome him in and turn on your heel, going to your kitchen to place them into a vase quickly before going back to him, seeing him in the same spot you two were sitting in earlier.

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry again… and thank you for letting me come back and talk to you at all, really don’t deserve your time, but I’m thankful for it.” He began, eyes glued onto yours as he scooted closer to you when you sat down, his fingers tentatively trailing on your arm before laying his hand on your own, “I… I want you back, y/n. I want to be with you, I never stopped wanting just you.”

“Harry, I… I don’t know what to say.” You started, “I just… there’s so much still up in the air and it’s all happening so fast. Are you still with Olivia?”

“No, of course not.” He instantly answered, “we were never anything real, I left Italy when I went to the house and you were gone. I came back here and I just… I would sit outside your building in my car and just try and get the nerve to walk in to talk to you, but I was so scared of you telling me to leave again.” Harry started deep into your eyes as he continued, his own welling up with tears, “I love you so much and I was such an idiot and fuck baby… I’ll do anything to prove it you.”

Now, you two were just inches apart, his hand cupping your cheek as you leaned into it, eyes glued onto his eyes as both of your gazes were glassy, sets of eyes wandering down to one another’s lips. Your eyes fluttered up and looked at him, his nose nudging into yours, seeming to test the boundary and you simply nodded, causing him to connect your lips in an instant.

Your lips met softly, gaining speed as the passion overflowed you both as the familiar move came back easier than either of you could have imagined. You both moaned into one another’s mouths, his tongue quickly sliding past your lips as your crawled onto his lap, fingers gripping the soft material of his shirt.

Things escalated quickly as he carried you into your bedroom, body hovering over yours as his body pressed against yours, the articles of clothing disappearing piece by piece, lips never separating a second longer than they had to you as you refamilarized yourselves with one another.

His fingers dug their way into your waist as he kissed you harder, singular pieces of thin material being the only things separating you and as Harrys fingers slipped down, pulling back and looking up at you for permission, your breath caught in your throat, reality hitting you like a wave.

“I can’t do this.” You whispered, fingers removing themselves from his hair as you covered your face, voice wavering as tears welled up in your eyes once again, “I-it’s all too much, too fast- I-I, I don’t think I can do this, Harry- I can’t.”

“Fuck, it’s okay.” He whispered, crawling off from on top of you, scrambling to pick his t shirt off the floor and handing to you, quickly covering your body with it, “Fuck, I’m sorry, did I hurt you?”

You nodded quickly, knees tucking into your chest as you let out soft cries, flinching as his arm came around you, going to comfort you with the soft stroke of his arm and retracted it quickly after seeing your reaction.

“I-I… I just keep seeing you and her in my head.” You whispered, “…I don’t know if I can do this.”

#harry styles imagine #harry styles angst #harry styles blurb #harry styles smut #harry styles fan fic #harry styles fan fiction #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles imagines #harry styles masterlist #harry styles series #harry styles #harry styles one shot #harry styles headcannon #harry styles fanfic #bucky barnes

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saintobio · 3 years

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i´ve been waiting for so long to leave an ask here :d. i really love sn and its one of my favorites series rn, i really adore how you put the characters and the amount of detail and work that you put in it is the best and makes me think that this would look in the big screen or something like that cuz ive never seen a plot so messy (in a good way haha i really love the twists and development to every single character including the ones that dont play a huge role into the novel) hope i can read++

++ more of it and see what is gonna be at the end !! <33 im glad i found this work ( ill tell u my final thoughts at the end of the series or at least at the end of the 1st season haha)

@japanesevenom said

saint holy shit it’s been a while since I’ve caught your inbox after reading a chapter and I’ve got to say…. I’m speechless I having nothing to give apart from tears and the broken pieces of my heart god damn I mean we knew it all from the start but I’m still really hurt by the revelation honestly you’re going to give me a heart condition it’s not healthy for my heart to hurt this much I feel like It’s caged in metal im crying

But oh my god I love sad desperate satoru it’s truly questionable how much I reread his reaction to the divorce announcement and now to this something about men when they’re begging for forgiveness and professing their love that hits different well I love u

Damn… at least we had lots of fluff on his birthday now we got to figure out custody of the baby my god

Anonymous said

This isn’t really an ask but thank you so much for writing Sincerely Not, I never knew a post that I happened to fall upon at 3 am one morning would take over about 4 months of my life. It’s crazy that it’s coming to an end and I’m excited to see what you have in store for us readers !! Take care 💛💛💛

Anonymous said

im nervous for sn2 omg >///< also tmi was listening to this song "i love you so - the walters" and reminded me of sn ❤️ thank you sm for the great series saint!!! i hope ur getting enough rest stay safe 💟

Anonymous said

i haven’t been able to interact or read the latest chapters because of uni but just wanted to check in! hope you’re doing good and that your days are well Saint!

-🦢

@natsukashii-ai said

Yayy!! finally! i just wanted to addressed your AMAZING work for “sincerely not” wow such a treat 💖 keep the good work sweetie ✌🏻

Anonymous said

i havent written an ask in so so so so long because i know you have a lot on your plate and didnt wanna add to it but i just want you to know that your works are absolutely amazing, ik you hear it from many people already but i just wanna say i appreciate you a whole lot. you stories are fucking amazing i dont know how many times I've reread all of them already. sincerely not keeps me going lately its something that i look forward to every week something that makes me wanna get up everyday 😭😭 i love u and ur works so much words arent enough!!

@sin-with-quiche said

I just want to say I'm a huge fan of this story. I love everything you put into it. The thought, the dedication, the love. I'm sure us readers can feel all of it. I recommended this to my friend, and she absolutely loves it too. We fangirl & discuss about the story! I swear to God, you have first class material to make this into an excellent drama! Do take care of yourself, and don't mind the negative remarks. I love you & your work so much!!! <3(btw I sent another ask long ago, hope u read it!)

THANK YOUUUU SO MUCH 😭😭😭 sn1 is ending soon and i’m really grateful for the love u guys have given this series <33 i appreciate the feedback and support !!

#saintobio.asks #series: sincerely not

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donquxiotes · 2 years

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important announcements abt my askbox + 700 followers event. not proofread, so excuse any mistakes. use context clues.

firstly, i would like to thank everyone who sent their lewdings in my askbox. i appreciated it more than u know. i, however have a couple of problems regarding my askbox like holding asks for too long, not being inspired enough to write, forgetting my asks & etc. so asks tend to stay in my askbox for months. i keep telling myself not to feel bad bc it happens & i can’t force myself to write even tho i want. but i still do. so sincerely, i’m incredibly sorry for the asks that i didn’t do/get to. ik some of u work up a helluva courage to send to me, just for me not to do it. i feel like shit bc of it. to put it simply, i deleted all the asks in my askbox.

+ abt my askbox, i don’t like being perceived as mean, shocker right? so i force myself to put energy into my asks bc i don’t want my anons to think i’m being rude or disrespectful w how i normally am but it’s tiring. so tiring that i just close out of my askbox for the day. there are times where i just don’t feel social. so for now on, i will answer asks how i want & u don’t have to send any if u find me being rude. i will remember to use tone indicators where i see fit.

secondly, regarding my 700 followers event, idek. atm i’m not inspired to do it & is 80% close to deleting the entire event despite me loving every little bit of it. i took three days coming up w that event and spent even longer coming up w names for the habitats 😒 i’m not sure what happened to the inspo i had for the event. around that time, i just went into a big funk where i couldn’t write despite having everything that i need to write. it’s disheartening. i can’t keep making myself feel bad because once again, it’s out of my control. instead, i’m coming out w a hybrid collab for dom content writers. not gonna talk much abt that yet. but i want everyone to be prepared & i want everyone to actually do it. and not leave me nor any of u, hanging. (like i did) so i want to do it where it’s a comfy time for writers to add a drabble or two to their list of to-do’s. so it’s like, either my 700 followers event or the hybrid collab. i’m not doing both, not around the same time atleast yk? so, the 700 followers event will most likely be deleted.

lastly, i’m almost to 1k. surprisingly. and tbh, i don’t feel as proud of myself as i should. nowadays it just feels like people follow me and never support me after that. i’m not gonna keep complaining abt it & beg y’all to give me feedback bc it’s a simple thing that every writer deserves. but half of the time, i force myself to write just to provide y’all w content & it just don’t feel good anymore w the lack of practically anything. most of my support comes from my own friends + people in the tags (which bring in some new moots + followers) the ratio is truly sickening. i don’t think i will do an event for until i’m really confident in my followers. i write for myself, not for followers but the follower’s feed-back does make me feel proud, is all i’m saying. having followers is like “wow people really support what i like, yay” but it’s like if you’re not actually supporting me, why are u even here? yk. it’s just frustrating. idk if i’m saying i’m not gonna write anymore but, i am sick of providing y’all w FREE SHIT when the appreciation isn’t provided back. so yea. i’m sick of that.

tho, i am so happy for the few of u who send me asks, indulge in my random lewds & those who actually rb + like my content all the time, i see u! alwaysss. y’all are the ones that really makes me want to keep writing. but, having a big following does not feel good anymore. <33

some xtras things incase u aren’t aware:

my rules & regulations are always being updated every other day. i usually update the types of characters i write + kinks/fetishes i write.

my dni/byf is in my bio. the highlighted word is the link to it. i’m gonna change the theme of my blog soon so hopefully it’s where y’all will b able to access it easier & quicker. i feel like some of y’all don’t even try to click around.

my taglist form is right here! and it will always b in my pinned post. i will check it before i post a drabble or headcanons. ofc, u don’t have to join it if u don’t wanna!

ok i think that’s the end of this announcement. i just needed to get a few things off of my chest.

#. ⊹ . .kale’s important announcements.#long text.

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bunny-xoxo · 3 years

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✨ Anon Playlist

For my ✨ anon, I hope it’s what you were looking for!

warning: slight timeskip!nishinoya spoilers, kissing?

gif not mine, credit to owner

A/N: I tried to make this GN! since I don’t know your pronouns, if you have any problems please let me know!

Relationship Head Cannons

Okok reading your ask I definitely had to pair you with Nishinoya!! Looking at your interests and your personality etc. I think you guys would make a lovely couple :)

He definitely met you while traveling and immediately asked you for your number (this man is so bold and shameless you cannot tell me otherwise); he was probably a little ridiculous about it and loud and he could not believe you said yes

Went from 😉😁😏 to 👁👄👁,,,😳😳😳 so fast

Called Tanaka drunk after you gave him your number talking about how you have to be the one or something cause he just got some gorgeous babe’s phone number at the bar and he’s pretty sure it’s real

Tanaka still laugh’s about it with him all the time and Noya’s always like oml haha so embarrassing😅😅 stop it dude they’re gonna think I’m a creep 🤬

Nishinoya love’s it when you get to meet his friend’s and get along with them!! It make’s his heart so full!

Double dates with Tanaka and Kiyoko!!! And Noya’s just so🤩🤩 guys guys look at my bb!!!!

omg would endlessly brag about your cocktail making skills asjjskfjnkajeke and NO ONE asked but he can’t help himself

Would shamelessly ask you to paint him and then immediately start undressing for a nude painting adjskfieurir

Would for SURE ask you to read to him and it’s one of the few times he’s actually calm, he just finds it so calming he gets to stare at you and just bask in you and how much he loves you is the real reason

Love love loves listening to you talk about your current book obsession and just finds it so cute

let’s be honest just worships the ground you walk on

LOTS of stargazing on beaches at night

He would ask you an abundance of questions about literally anything you know or love cause he’s a passionate guy, too!! You guys could definitely talk for hours and hours and never get bored of each other

And the way you listen to him while he rants about literally any and everything makes his heart practically implode

He’s so soft for you too cause he never thought someone would actually be down for his lifestyle of traveling and having a good time but you do! And you enjoy it so much :)!

PHYSICAL AFFECTION

LOVES holding your hand cause not only does it let him run around and make sure he’s not gonna lose you in the crowd but it just makes him feel so close to you? And it let’s everyone know he’s your boyfriend which he takes so much pride in pls

All in all, your guys’ relationship is just so full of fun that when you guys get to lay and look at the stars together and everything slows down for that moment, Noya knows he really loves you and couldn’t imagine finding anyone better

And what you’ve been waiting for... your playlist!

Ok, so I did my best to match your playlist to the indie vibes you mentioned and keeping it to the scenario of just laying with Noya as best as I could!

I sincerely hope you enjoy, please tell me your thoughts!! Below is the listed songs in order and my explanation for each :). And if you need anything changed, please tell me!

1. Lost in Your Love - Colyer: This song definitely is reminiscent of when you two first met, seeing you just hit him like a truck. Now, he could let literally let go of anything in his life as long as you were there with him. He’s quite definitely lost in your love (talk about devoted, sheesh).

2. My Kind of Woman - Mac DeMarco: So this is written with the intent of keeping you gender neutral since I don’t know your pronouns, so I don’t specifically take the “woman” part of this song as inspiration, but rather the idea of the love in the song if that makes sense. But if this song makes you uncomfortable please let me know and I will happily replace this song. SIMP ALERT 🚨 please Noya wishes he could dedicate this song to you with his whole heart. It’s more of him just being in complete disbelief that YOU choose to be by his side (this is a common theme here 🙄) It doesn’t matter how long you two are together he will never get over letting him be by your side

3. Nothing - Bruno Major: PLS THIS SONG IS MAKING ME SO SOFT FOR NOYA😰✋ please, this is your guys song. The epitome of just laying in each other’s presence and enjoying the warmth and conversation between you two, it’s these moments that really make Noya fall in love with you

4. Something About You - sophie meiers: Noya was definitely more nervous to ask you to be an official couple than he was saying I love you LMAO. He was just so scared to be like look I really like you, please just let me be yours and please be mine officially and let me do couple things with you and show you cool things I like (definitely came off like 💧👁u👁..... be my girlfriend? 🧍‍♂️)

5. Pluto Projector - Rex Orange County: C’mon now TELL me this ain’t you and Noya 🙄✋ your relationship is definitely always in that “honeymoon” phase, you guys are just effortlessly obsessed with each other cause not only do you have so much love to give but so does he!! And this song is just pure ~vibes~

6. Fall - Chloe x Halle: Ok, this one is mainly just for the feeling of it, but okok. You and Noya laying and looking up at the stars and it starts to rain but he just won’t get up and you guys just lay there having a laughing fit until you pull him up and make him come back to the warmth of your guys’ home. And as you’re drying each other off and you have a towel around your shoulders and your still dripping a little and you’re handing him his tea and fuck you just look so perfect he can’t help but tell you he loves you

7. Honeybee - Steam Powered Giraffe: SLOW DANCE TIME, everyone's gotta have one right? It’s more soft behavior, but this song? WHEW. Noya know’s he will forever be trapped by you and your beauty and presence but he just couldn’t care less, the things you do to him, god he swears you’re gonna kill him.

8. Intertwined - dodie: There’s no way you could mention laying with your s/o and NOT have me put this song on there, please just listen to this song you’ll understand 🙏 pure cuddly, chill vibes

9. Turning Page - Sydney Rose: stop it this song makes me cry tell me you guys aren’t laying with each other, tracing each other’s features with your fingers, memorizing every little detail there is to notice (fuck this is so intimate i-)

10. Like You Do - Joji: 🚨A LITTLE NOYA ANGST IM SORRY🚨 Noya would be a little scared his lifestyle would become too much and it’s kind of an irrational fear he has for you, but at the same time he knows that you make him so happy and you love him so much he’d be willing to even change this for you if it meant you could keep loving him like you do now.

11. Goodbye Horses - Q Lazzarus: Did someone say late night cuddly and giggly make out sesh? 😳 Noya pulling away every time just to go “oh no sir🤠!” before kissing you again ( :40 in the song, you’ll know what I’m talking about)

12. Body Language - Miki Ratsula: We get it you two 🙄✋ you like laying down and cuddling together

13. Dogs at the Beach - The Altogether: PLS this is just for vibes tbh

14. Wanna Know - Sabrina Claudio: I do feel like sometimes Noya is a very blunt guy who says it as is, and not everyone else is like that! So I’m sure sometimes he gets nervous that he’s too much for you and whether or not you love him as much as he loves you! But ultimately he knows you guys wouldn’t be where you are now if you didn’t love him (and then he immediately hates himself for even questioning your love, protect him pls)

15. Let Me Follow - Son Lux: TL;DR, all you need is each other’s love to exist and you couldn’t ask for more.

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AHHHH IT’S FINALLY HERE , I’m sorry this took so long! I was having a lot of problems with Tumblr and am a fairly new writer, I really hope you enjoyed this, please give me your feedback and thoughts! I want to make sure you got this :(

Feedback and opinions from anyone is appreciated!

request’s for playlist’s are currently closed until I finish the others, but I will make a post when they’re open again! And to all of those who have requested, they’ll be out shortly!!

-🐇out

#haikyuu playlist #haikyu requests #haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #haikyuu!!#nishinoya x reader #nishinoya headcanons #matchup #Karasuno #timeskip!nishinoya #✨anon #gn!reader

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bikkinibottom · 4 years

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Can’t Walk Without You

Here’s a little something I wrote to celebrate 100 followers! I got the idea based off of this post here.

This is my first time writing fanfic so I’d love for some feedback! Hope you all enjoy it!

Summary: It’s the 90’s and Percy makes mixtapes for Annabeth. She listens to them when she misses him.

She took it with her everywhere now, constantly listening to whichever song that played through the Walkman. It got to the point where even if she was having a conversation or in a meeting, the headphones rested around her neck playing music just loud enough for her to still hear and whoever happened to be right next to her. Some may call it rude, but people knew to never question Annabeth, especially with everything going on now.

Annabeth remembers the first mixtape Percy had made for her when they were fourteen. It was not too long after the battle on Mount Othrys where Percy and the group had rescued her and the goddess Artemis from Luke’s imprisonment. She smiles fondly too herself as she remembers the encounter with Percy:

Christmas was just around the corner and Annabeth begrudgingly decided to spend the holiday with her family in San Francisco. Percy and she had agreed to meet up to exchange gifts at Half-Blood Hill before she left. She stood near the Big House, which was adorned in colorful holiday lights, waiting for him. Behind her led to where the cabins were, the hearth at the center of the U-shaped formation seemed to glow brighter than ever, warm and inviting just like a fireplace at Christmas-time should be. The sky was clear save for a few clouds, the constellations piercing and bright. Fresh snow lay all over camp, some of the year-rounders just beginning to take advantage of the fresh snowfall. She looked up to see Percy approaching her, his ears looked pink without a hat on from what she could tell in the dim light.

‘Seaweed Brain’ she thought, thinking of the winter hat she knit him for his gift. It was a simple beanie that was baby blue, with one black stripe cutting across.

“Took you long enough. I got a flight to catch tomorrow, Seaweed Brain,” she jokingly said to him.

Clearly something else was occupying his mind because the scowl he attempted to make wasn’t sincere and looked more like fond exasperation. Annabeth tried not to look too into it.

He stopped walking and begun to turn around dramatically.

“Well if you’re gonna have that attitude about it I’ll just be on my-” but Annabeth cut him off with a laugh and shoved his arm.

“Come on, Percy. I’ve been waiting for this,” she told him with a bit of mock irritation in her voice.

“You have?” the boy before her asked timidly. And for the first time that night, Annabeth noticed Percy actually looked anxious for whichever reason she could not figure out yet. His eyes looked more of a golden from the reflection of the Christmas lights shining off the Big House.

Annabeth looked away from his eyes as she casually said, “Duh, we’re exchanging gifts. It’s like the best part of the holiday season,” though she wasn’t too sure of her response seeing the gloomy expression take over his face.

Percy looked away as he let out a simple, “Right.”

Not wishing to dampen the mood on what was supposed to be a pleasant occasion, Annabeth quickly asks, “Do you want to go first?”

“Uh, I- no. You go first,” he responded quickly as well.

Annabeth presented him with his gift bag filled with sea-green tissue paper and he dug around in it until he pulled out the gift card she had gotten him. He flipped it over to see what it was for and he smiled appreciatively.

“That’s the skate store you go to a lot right? The one by your apartment?” she asked just to double-check and make sure.

“Yeah! I- Thanks Annabeth,” he told her genuinely then paused. “Uh, how much is on it?”

“A hundred dollars,” she replied.

His eyes seemed to pop out of his head before he stuttered for the next few seconds. Annabeth just looked at him with a confused but amused smile on her face.

“This- this is more than enough for a whole new skateboard. I- I don’t think I can accept this,” he blurted out in shock.

“Skateboards are expensive. I thought that was a good amount,” she said matter-of-factly. Annabeth had briefly forgotten that Percy and his mom didn’t have a whole lot, meanwhile, her family was more than well off and Annabeth could afford to splurge on her friends.

“There’s another gift in the bag,” she pointed out.

He gave her an incredulous look before digging around in the bag. He pulled out the beanie wrapped in a layer of tissue paper and unwrapped it. He held out the hat in front of him with a neutral expression.

“You hardly ever wear a hat, let alone own a proper winter one so I figured you could use a nice one. I made it myself,” she said, her voice laced with pride. It had taken her a couple of tries to knit a hat before she managed to perfect it. Athena wasn’t the goddess of crafts for nothing. Annabeth was proud of her handiwork.

“You made this?” he asked softly. The tender look in his eyes made Annabeth’s face a little warm but she nodded genuinely.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Annabeth said. “It’s your turn.”

“O- oh. Right.” Percy cleared his throat and placed the gift bag on the snowy ground with his presents inside. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a card with a smaller rectangular box attached to it. Annabeth didn’t know what the box could be seeing as it was wrapped but she opened the card and read it to herself first.

The card itself didn’t have many words and with the low-lighting, she couldn’t exactly make it out with her dyslexia. But underneath the message of the card, she noticed Percy’s chicken scratch hand-writing where he wrote out in Ancient Greek, ‘Hope you have a good new year. Merry Christmas, Wise Girl. Your friend, Percy’.

She smiled up at him and gave him a sweet thank you.

“Um, the uh, the gift. I made it myself. I don’t know if you’ll like it but um, if you give it back I understand. It’s kind of lame, actually-” Percy stammered out, and she could tell the red on his face wasn’t coming from the Christmas lights. With a roll of her eyes, she tore open the wrapping and was presented with a cassette player. Written on one side in Percy’s hand-writing it said: ‘Songs I Think You’ll Like (vol. 1)’.

“It’s a mixtape,” Percy blurted out, “I was thinking about how we’ve barely ever talked about music so I put a bunch of songs I figured you’d like. You can listen to it whenever you want.”

Annabeth was at a loss for words. Picturing Percy in his room toiling with the radio on, waiting for hours for the right song to come on to record, or maybe using some of Sally’s old records to record music from... It was a little too much for Annabeth.

Impulsively she jumped towards Percy, wrapping her arms around his neck in a quick hug. Backing away she looked him in the eyes.

“Thank you, I love it,” she told him. At that point, she didn’t need a mirror to know that both their faces were red now.

“Really?” he asked, relief in his voice and body language.

“Yes, I can’t wait to listen to it,” she answered genuinely.

A goofy smile broke out onto his face and Annabeth felt herself smiling as well. After talking for a bit more, they eventually said their goodbyes and parted ways.

As Annabeth boarded the plane the next morning, she had a brand new Walkman stuffed in her pocket that she had bought as soon as she left the campgrounds last night. She couldn’t wait to listen to it on the plane.

Recalling the memory brought a melancholy smile to her face, but it was very dim. Annabeth remembers how nearly every month after that she received a mixtape from Percy in the mail, each with a different purpose but all equally good. When they had started dating, the music became a lot more romantic and he would gift her one at each monthly anniversary. She would’ve received a new mixtape soon for their five-month anniversary, but now he was missing and Annabeth wasn’t sure if she’d ever get to hear it. The thought made her chest ache painfully, and she blinked back tears.

Rolling onto her back in her bunk, Annabeth thought back to the events of the day and let out a frustrated sigh. Just when she finally had some type of lead to where her boyfriend might be, she was met with three demigods at the Grand Canyon with more questions than answers. Not to mention her least favorite goddess seemed to be involved in all of this somehow. Realizing she needed to get actual sleep tonight if she was going to leave early in the morning to search for Percy, the daughter of Athena put on her invisibility cap, grabbed her Walkman, and snuck out of Cabin 6 to head over to Cabin 3.

Inhaling the ocean scent that Poseidon’s cabin had, Annabeth made her way over to Percy’s dresser, where he always kept extra clothes. Grabbing one of his hoodies, she put it on and laid down in Percy’s bunk. It wasn’t the biggest secret amongst her siblings that she would often sneak out to his cabin at night but since he went missing she made it her new unassigned sleeping quarters.

If the bed weren’t cold, Annabeth could almost imagine Percy there with her. Surrounding herself in his ocean breeze scent helped put her to sleep but there was some dull ache lingering inside her tonight. It was as if there was nothing inside her; her heart, her lungs, everything just- gone. Instead, a dark void seemed to eat at her from the inside out, and all of her senses felt numb.

Putting on her headphones and pressing play on the Walkman, her favorite cassette plays out. Once they’d started dating, Percy gave her this one and told her the songs sounded a bit like the one they had danced to on Olympus all those years ago. She recalls Percy telling her that to him the song sounded a bit sad, but a little hopeful too.

Annabeth cries herself to sleep that night.

#i didn't say it was gonna be happy LOL #not sorry #i've had this stuck in my head for a while #my writing #percabeth fic #percabeth #oneshot #pjo #hoo #ttc #tlh #percy jackson #annabeth chase #fanfiction #erica writes

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sherlockfanficwriting · 4 years

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Sherlock “Dangerous Love” (x reader)

Summary - You were always as smart as your brother, Sherlock, however you functioned....a little bit more normal. Breaking into your sister’s psychiatric prison brings forth danger, making you and Sherlock susceptible to it. Will Eurus’s tricks and aid of Moriarty fail to overcome your combined intelligence and skills, if so, will it come with a price? What sacrifices will be made?

Warnings - blood, violence

A/N - I’m certain most of you will love this story as from the feedback from the sibling stories. It’s something you’ve been waiting for. I kinda added some more things to eurus too. Enjoy. @redheaded-hobbit @fanfictionsilove love all u huge credit to @bakerstreethound for basically giving me an amazing dialogue and action scene with Moriarty and the shot, couldn’t have done any better. Check out her works if you love Sherlock ❤️

You skipped up the steps to Sherlock’s flat and burst through the door. He sat on his usual chair. John stood next to him, pacing. Your brother locked eyes with you.

“Did you know?” He asked.

You shook your head. How could you know you had a sister? You’ve had no memories. All you remembered were your brothers, much smaller.

“Did Mycroft tell you anything else?” You asked, walking closer to him. Sherlock’s eyes gave way into his thoughts. He was concentrating, processing a plan.

“I know where she’s at. I got a summary and went on from there.” He squinted his eyes. “Did you get anything else?”

You pursed your lips. “Maybe. Tell me what you have first.”

Sherlock breathed hard. “Master mind. She’s connected with Moriarty. Went to Sweden then the states on multiple jobs, developing a base. In prison now. She was a scientist, worked in chemistry.”

“Like you,” John said, looking at Sherlock.

“She’s involved with Moriarty, however I think he’s tricked. Multiple disguises. You’ve seen her already,” you faced John, “you have too.”

A confused look spread across his face. “I have?” He asked.

You nodded. “She’s good at this.”

“I don’t doubt that she was behind some of Moriarty’s plots. Lestrade has a hit on something else. Threats on the prime minister. They’re talking about a bomb. I went over and spoke with him. It’s Moriarty’s work.” Sherlock said, looking up at the ceiling. He was stumped, which was quite odd for him.

“We have to stop her. Break the connection. Find out her motives. We couldn’t possibly know.” You said. John sighed and lightly cursed under his breath.

“Threats to the government. Perfect,” John huffed.

“She’s using him,” you added. You already knew it. Moriarty was merely a puppet. His only flaw was his trust. It was too easy. She offered him momentary pleasure. He was easy.

“We’re going to go see her.” Sherlock said, standing up and walking to the kitchen. You followed him.

“How?” John asked.

“You’ll see.” Sherlock said, putting on his coat. You walked out the door with Sherlock. John followed behind. He called for a taxi. One came sprinting by and you hopped in with everyone.

“Waterloo station.” Sherlock said.

----------------

The train took you from London to Wales. The skies were dark with dismay. John still looked confused.

“I’ll see you there?” You said to your brother.

He nodded. “Stay on time.”

You began walking off.

“(Y/N)!” Sherlock called. You turned around.

“Be safe.” He said. You smiled at them. You weren’t exactly the best at being safe.

Danger was in your blood. You could sense almost everything, but you couldn’t always sense danger. Most times, you placed yourself in it. You didn’t know why, but thinking about it led you in a loop, undiscovered.

You continued walking onwards from the station and turned around. Sherlock and John went the other way, their bodies soon became lost with the people. You called for a taxi which took you further up the bay, closer to the water. You toyed with your nails, couldn’t refrain from thinking about Eurus. Did you share any traits with her? Were you similar? Was she like you? You knew about her disguises, but you never knew what she looked like. She was manipulative. You could only elaborate on that. You were eager to find out more, pieces together the missing remnants of your childhood. You hopped out of the taxi after paying the driver. You were much closer to the water now. Dark waves hit the stone supports harshly. Small boats were on the water. You scanned the abyss.

“Got it.” You said to yourself.

The small distinct cargo ship you were told to look for was parked and getting ready to leave. You quickly looked around and saw a construction vest and a few jackets hung over a rail near the ship. You walked to it and swiftly grabbed the vest, putting it on in one move. You messed up your hair a bit and shirt, trying to look worn. You were wearing a pair of black palazzo pants and heels which made you rethink your plan. You walked up to the side door of the ship. A man stood pacing around on his phone, smoking a cigarette. He looked up at you when you walked inside.

“I left a few tools in the back from before. Management asked me to get them real quick.” You looked at him and smiled, trying to radiate your charm.

“Sure, sweetie. We leave soon, just so you know,” The man said.

“I’ll be out before you know it.” You winked at him which caused him to shake his head and blush.

You began walking around near the back, pretending to know where you were going. You opened another door, which lead to a series of steps to the keel. You closed the door and walked down. There was ship machinery in every corner. You wiggled through some engines and sat down on a spot between two. You were certain no one would see you here. You waited six whole minutes until you felt the ship start moving. You sighed in relief and patiently waited. Trying to pass the time, you tried to envision Eurus which was difficult. All those deceptive things she did made you question your lineage. You were nervous for what you were about to do. Spying, solving cases, software, criminals - it was all in your blood, but you felt particularly nervous today. You hadn’t done anything like this before. Your mind went over to Mycroft. You decided that he wouldn’t be much help to this. Thinking about Sherlock and how you were on the same waters now comforted you. You leaned your head against the engine behind you. Your eyes closed, but your unconscious intuit didn’t subside.

---------------

You woke up from a quick doze, hitting your head on the engine you were against. The ship stopped, causing you to move forward.. You quickly stood up and walked up the sharp stairs. You had to be careful. You couldn’t be seen.

You opened the door and poked your head out, scanning your surroundings. Seeing that no one was nearby, you walked out and opened the main side door. No one was outside yet, which gave you time to run out. You sprinted across the sand and nudged your body on the side of a cliff, hidden. You took off your vest. You didn’t look at the prison in details, but you noticed the sad stone walls. The prison was on top of the mossy stretched cliff.

You peeped your eye out of your hiding and saw a man walking out of the ship. You didn’t see him before. He carried boxes and wheeled a larger box out. You knew they were all supplies. The man boarded back on the ship which started the journey back under watchful eyes from the security. You put half of your body out of the cliff and waited until a few men walked out to pick them up. They were security, but acted casually, now that the ship was out of sight. They walked up the steps. You sneaked up behind them and stepped to the side before they stepped in. After the last man walked inside, you grabbed the door handle right before it closed. You angled your body to reach the combination code pad. You squeezed it a certain way, just how you’ve done countless times before, which enabled it to open and reveal the colorful wires activating it. You stretched your body further to spark two wires. Immediately after doing so, red lights and a light buzzer began flashing and going off inside and outside. You opened the door and walked inside casually. A few security guards jogged down the hall. You walked past offices and an occasional guard, who paid no attention to anything except his cell phone. You maintained a confident posture and gaze. No one even saw you.

You didn’t know where Sherlock was, but by analyzing the design and structure of the building, you had an idea where Eurus’s cell was. You walked down the staircase and through the hallway. As you were walking down, a door slammed open immediately and out came Sherlock and Mycroft - Mycroft? A second later came John and a man with a suit. Sherlock noticed you first.

“Well done. I was getting worried. As soon as I heard the alarm, I knew.” He said. Sherlock was in a better mood. You knew he was alert. Highly alert. He was excited. It was as if he was almost built for this, and you as well. The red lights and alarm stopped.

“Mycroft? What are you doing here?” You asked, trying to maintain your composure. He wore a suit, directly coming from the London.

“I-.” He started.

“Enough with that. He had full intention to come here on his own to handle this situation by himself.” Sherlock said.

“You’re unbelievable. You don’t trust us. What would your plan be to get around this?”

“This is what I was trying to avoid. I am the government who is taking great care of those threats. How did you even get in?” Mycroft asked you, scoffing.

You rolled your eyes at him. “Do you not know anything about me? You always do this.”

Mycroft sighed and seemed sincere. “I’m sorry.”

Although Mycroft and you were different, you still shared similarities, and it wasn’t only blood. He was always tender to you and didn’t usually yell, like Sherlock. Mycroft never really treated you like mutual. You were still trying to find out why, possibly because you were merely his sister.

“There are memories.” You said.

“Blank ones. I’m aware. I’m sorry. Surely, you can try to understand why.” He replied, rubbing his temples.

“There are more important things to do. I know,” You added.

“I’m leaving.” Sherlock called out. You looked at Mycroft again, then ran up to Sherlock and followed him. He walked up the staircase and down the hallway, making a turn to the right. He opened a door which led to a blank room. Your heart began to beat faster. You knew what was through the other door. You beat him to it and swung the door open. There, in a glass wall was your sister, Eurus, playing a violin. You stood still, wrapping your head around her. Your mind naturally tried to analyze and inspect everything, but you couldn’t figure anything else out about her. Sherlock moved you aside and walked inside, next to you.

John came inside, but Mycroft wasn’t here. Eurus stopped playing and looked at everyone. She locked her eyes with you.

“Sister,” She said. “How much you’ve changed.” Her voice was soft. She possessed a kind demeanor, but underneath it, you sensed desperateness. Evilness. Intellect. Eurus looked at Sherlock.

“Hello, Eurus,” Sherlock said. Eurus’s expression didn’t change.

“Where is Mycroft?” She asked.

“Not here.” Sherlock said.

“No, silly. I know he’s here.” Eurus turned around and began walking in a circle.

Sherlock walked closer to the glass. “Eurus, what are your plans?”

Eurus walked closer. “Don’t you know them?”

“You’re with Moriarty. Why? What can you give him?” Sherlock asked. He thought hard. “I know about your plans with the government.”

Eurus looked at him. She wasn’t surprised. “It’s mutual. I gave him ideas.”

“Ideas?”

“Are you thinking about Redbeard?” Eurus asked. Sherlock didn’t say anything.

You were finally starting to understand everything. “You can give him something else.”

Eurus looked at you and smiled. You knew it all.

You walked out of the room and began running as soon as you entered the hallway and sprinted up another flight of steps. You passed by a glass office, covered by an entirety of glass walls and windows. The abyss of the ocean lay idle in your vision. There, you saw Mycroft sitting on a chair. You opened the door. He looked up at you, but didn’t say anything. Something’s wrong.

“What is it?” You asked. He didn’t look up. You walked closer to him and breathed hard when you saw what was on the floor. A man, recently shot, was dead. Blood poured from his stomach.

“What happened?” You asked him. Mycroft stayed silent. You put your hands on his shoulders and shook him. He looked up at you finally and stared you in the eyes. Then you knew.

Moriarty

You turned around. There he was. He wore a casual silver suit and had a glimmer in his eyes. He was confident, ready, excited. He stood by the door straight up. You scanned him without even moving your eyes. He had a gun, but he didn’t hold it.

“It’s so great to see you here!” He exclaimed. You didn’t say anything. Your mind moved quickly, planning your next move. You knew his intentions.

“I’ve finally outsmarted you.” He said.

You stood up and walked closer to him.

“(Y/N),” Mycroft said. You ignored him.

Moriarty adjusted his shoulders and stood up straighter. You kept eye contact with him.

“What are you going to do?” You asked him, trying to make him think you were ten steps behind.

“What would be the fun in giving that away?” He leaned closer to you, touching your neck.

You opened the door and walked out. Just like that. You knew he wouldn’t shoot you. He was enjoying this. You walked by an alarm and stopped. You opened the alarm case and sparked two wires, the same process you did earlier. You punched in a code. An alarm went off, fulfilling your next plan. You ran downstairs and walked into the room where Sherlock and Mycroft originally were. You knew there was a weapon somewhere. Emergencies. You looked up and down everywhere. You placed your hand under the table and smiled when you felt the cold metal, just where you thought it would be. You hid the gun in your waistline then walked into Eurus’s room. Sherlock rushed out, almost bumping into you, but stabilized you with his arms. A worried look spread across his face when he looked into yours. He didn’t have to ask you anything to know what was going on. He ran out with John.

You opened the door to see Eurus standing in the middle of the room. You knew what you had to do. Your mind was thinking. You acted fast and quick. No emotions played through you. You opened the glass door and entered her room.

“I never got to know you.” She said.

You pulled out your gun. She didn’t react when she saw it. You held the gun up at her.

“We were never similar,” you remarked. “I don’t want to know anything about you. I already know what I need.”

Eurus laughed at you. “You won’t win this. You do realize that?”

You shook your head. “I’ll win. I know that it comes with a sacrifice.”

She scoffed. “You give up that easily? You never did know how to think, did you?”

You walked closer to the glass and kept your gun to your side. “I know more than you think I do. You wouldn’t have a slight idea. Here you are, thinking you’re a mastermind. A perfect place to be, a prison, filling everyone with delusions. You call that winning?”

Eurus walked in another circle. “It’s working. Isn’t it? If you kill me, you’ve still lost.”

You opened the glass door and held your gun to the level of her head.

“You’re insane. Does it look like I need you? You think I do, but that’s great, cause I don’t.” You pulled the trigger, shooting her in the head. Instantly, a red dot formed and grew larger. Her lifeless body fell down immediately. Eurus underestimated you. Although you seemed more human, you weren’t. Your mind was full not even near capacity of concepts and secrets she wouldn’t be capable of attaining or understanding. She was confident you wouldn’t kill her. That’s where you outsmarted her. You knew where Moriarty’s was and his next move, but you were right before. Sacrifices had to be made. Just thinking about it caused your stomach to twist in knots.

You put the gun inside of your pants, on a hinge of your waistline and ran upstairs. You walked up the steps to see Sherlock standing away from Moriarty. Moriarty was saying something. Mycroft still sat down on the chair. John stood behind Sherlock. The alarm wasn’t on anymore.

Moriarty turned around to face you. “The gang’s all here!” He said cheerfully, pulling his gun out casually.

“Each one of you has ruined my chances of success and hadn’t even thought twice about it.” His voice shrilled. “That’s it.” He was right. We have. Delusional. You saw how Eurus messed with his head.

Moriarty walked around in a circle. “Who wants to die first? I have all the time in the world!”

“Moriarty!” John cried out. Sherlock placed an arm blocking him.

“Mycroft, stand up.” Moriarty demanded. Mycroft slowly stood up and walked out of the office, cautiously. You knew they didn’t know that Eurus was dead. You would shoot Moriarty now, but there wasn’t any more bullets left.

“I’ll save the best for last,” he said. Moriarty pointed his gun to John. Sherlock couldn’t do anything. Mycroft wouldn’t. John shrunk down in horror.

“You don’t have to do this,” John said. He was terrified. You couldn’t take a chance with your gun.

You knew your plan.

Sacrifices.

You were the smartest one to initiate the approach. John dying first would mess it up. Without any hesitation, you began running to Moriarty. You jumped up on him and tried to throw him on the ground. He overpowered you and swung you across himself hard, throwing you down on the cold floor. Your body ached, but this was the first step.

“Don’t do that again!” Moriarty screamed. You lied on the ground, motionless.

“She’s dead,” you said.

Moriarty looked at you, shocked. You were pleased. “What did you say?”

“She’s dead. Are you....slow?”

Moriarty gripped his gun tightly and pointed it to everyone. He grew angry and looked at you with pure resentment in his face. He fled down the stairs, not looking back. Sherlock ran to your side. John stood near you. Mycroft walked closer, but he began pacing.

“I have a gun.” You said.

Sherlock didn’t speak. He pulled it out of your waistline. He sighed.

“None left. It might help you”

“I’m lost, but I’m thinking,” Sherlock said.

“We’re all dying today,” Mycroft added.

“Sacrifices. You know what to do. You all do. Go,” you demanded.

Sherlock was puzzled. “Sacrifices? You can’t surely mean-.”

You rose your voice. “I know. I do. It will work. You know what to do. You have time, just go.” Your voice was soft, full of reality.

“Don’t talk like that,” Mycroft said.

“She’s right,” Sherlock added. Mycroft didn’t understand nor did John. It was as if you and Sherlock shared thoughts. He got up from your side and kissed your head before he left. He motioned the others to follow him. You leaned against the glass window. The waves smacked against the cliffs hard.

You heard quick foosteps up the stairs. Moriarty came up. Anger filled his eyes.

“You didn’t think I would do it.” You said.

“I don’t need her,” he replied. He tried to make himself believe that. Moriarty grabbed your neck, but only lightly squeezed it.

“I was saving the best for last,” he said. It was all working.

“If you kill me, what will you accomplish?” You asked, going along with your preset plan.

Moriarty chuckled. “You’ll find out.”

“Will I?” You stalled. You saw out of your eye, Sherlock’s shoes come into your vision. You didn’t look away. You stared into Moriarty’s eyes.

“You killed everyone here, for what? Eurus is dead. You want to kill us. Solid plan.”

He shook his head. “I don’t understand you. You were always there, silently judging me! You ruined me! It was never Sherlock, it was you! Justice for what?!” He screamed.

“You’re weak. You rely on others to do your work. You can’t even manipulate anyone, you’re so bad at it. You are an awful criminal.” You spoke nonchalantly which angered him even more. As much as you were scared, you felt brave.

Moriarty snarled, cocking the gun, the hot metal pressed against your skull.

“You’re no smarter than you sound.”

Here we go

You swore you could feel your heart rate spike as you saw Sherlock’s shoes moving quickly met your eyesight in the split second. He stood to the side of Moriarty, behind him, working efficiently. You felt he was far away, but trusted him. Silence passed but for a moment, a silent bomb ticking with each breath that exhaled. Finally, as if it were a fine orchestration, a man you knew all too well sprinted, his mass of curls wild as he bolted to you, not before the shot rung out, slamming you harder against the wall, aiming the gun away from your head. Your mind began to spin, pulling your hands away only to look at the crimson coating your hands. Your eyes fell on your stomach, now a pool of redness. Your life played in slow motion. You saw Sherlock’s body move through the air and slam Moriarty into the glass window, causing it to shatter in pieces. Your body began to fall backwards, but strong arms pulled you back up. As your body twisted in the moment, you saw Moriarty’s body fall through the opening. Your senses came back to you. Pain filled your mind.

“(Y/N)!” Sherlock screamed. You met his eyes. He was panicking.

You looked into his eyes. “We did it,” you said. The shock numbed your pain. Mycroft and John ran to your side. Their voices were all mixed together. You felt blissful. Your mind flooded with happiness and peace. Is this really death? You doubted it felt like this. You went in and out of your senses a few times. Sherlock picked your body up, your head was snudged in his elbow. He ran fast. The ceiling changed from glass to stone as he ran quickly. Rain droplets fell on you as he ran outside.

“Where’s the boat?” Sherlock cried out. His voice was scared and cracked. You couldn’t see Mycroft. “It’s supposed to be here!”

“Where is the helicopter?! You had precise instructions!” Mycroft’s voice boomed through the phone. Your vision began to blur. It was weird. You didn’t know how you felt about this. You had no control over your body. Memories from your childhood, high school, college rushed through you. Sherlock placed you on the ground and firmly pressed on your stomach. You felt John do the same.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Sherlock cried. You heard the others sob. You tried to say something, but you couldn’t. You were in bliss. You managed to move your hand and squeezed Sherlock’s jacket. He held your hands. Someone else hand your other; you couldn’t tell who. Everything happened so quickly. Memories of crimes, computers, spying, all came flooding back. Exciting times of your life - moments where you almost died, you remembered it all now.

“(Y/N)!”

Your vision started to turn bright white and by doing so, your body shifted through a trance of euphoria. You felt proud. Dying with dignity - it never sounded as good as it felt. You accomplished what you needed. You knew there had to be sacrifices. The whiteness grew brighter, almost as if it was blinding you. You felt welcomed as if you belonged here. Your body was gone, but your mind was undecided. You chose to stay in this state for a bit longer. You continued to hear your siblings cry for you. Sherlock slumped his body over you and hugged you tightly. In the distance, you heard a helicopter. You didn’t know how you were doing it. If you hadn’t been the person you were, you could never manipulate death.

All you felt was peace

Part 2? You’ll find out

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spockandawe · 4 years

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So, my heart keeps circling and circling back to The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System, and I was idly prodding at why that is, even more than the other mxtx stories, and then I thought to myself, ‘why not ramble into the internet abyss instead of just in your own head?’ And so here we are.

I love this story so much, seriously. It was maybe the most difficult of the three novels for me to begin, because the translation editing is definitely rougher than mdzs and tgcf, and I think the story itself assumes that readers are kind of familiar with transmigration concepts (teal deer, person from real world reads novel, involuntarily is pulled into novel, often(?) as one of the established characters, lives out the-novel-plot-but-different).

But once I got past like, that first chapter? MAN. I was so hooked.

I think the first thing that really stands out to me is that Binghe as a love interest is...I’m not sure I want to say he’s more “flawed” than the other mxtx love interests, but that’s the best word I’m finding right now. The wangxian ship is mostly in tune with each other in the present, despite a few lingering misunderstandings. And the hualian ship, like, hua cheng rolls up like ‘heyy what up i would do anything you asked of me’ and xie lian was like ‘you. i like you a lottle.’ and their in-book development is mostly about bringing xie lian up to speed on the depth of their history together.

But Shen Qingqiu and Luo Binghe! The original canon Binghe is specifically a blackened hero, who is casually cruel and manipulative, and has collected up a massive harem of pretty ladies to be his wives and concubines. Pretty much the last straw in that blackening is that his abusive teacher (who he still desperately wanted the approval of) found out he was half demon (also news to luo binghe) and kicked him into the abyss where he had a miserable few years having his demon blood awakened. Later, he came back to the human realm, much stronger and angrier than when he left, and his morally questionable adventures involved de-limbing his old teacher, cutting out his tongue, and keeping him alive for years.

Shen Yuan is a modern-day human bean who has been hate-reading the webnovel of this story, where he can see a lot of interesting potential in the story, but is massively frustrated by the things the author has chosen to do with it. It is a Significant shock to his system when he wakes up inside the story, in the body of Shen Qingqiu. After Luo Binghe has already been his student for some time. Also, there’s a System that’s policing whether or not he acts in-character as Shen Qingqiu, and he’s going to get punished if his points drop below a certain threshold. He gets more freedom to act as the story progresses, but at first he has to do things like argue with the System about why he should be allowed to give medicine to Luo Binghe after he gets beat up (it will shame their sect if outsiders see him with a bruised face). And on the one hand, he’s trying DESPERATELY to avoid a future where he gets mutilated and tortured by his student, but... he is absolutely a massive softy who takes no time at all to start ADORING this kid and being super proud of everything he does. He won’t admit that, even in his own pov, and he has a very, very reserved external manner, but he’s so soft on the inside.

(ps why did using fans as conversational props stop being a thing. maybe sometimes i don’t WANT my face hanging out in public, maybe sometimes it’s extra fun to hide your expression.)

And this makes for a fascinating dynamic, because this new Shen Qingqiu 1) adores Luo Binghe, 2) is terrified of Luo Binghe.

At first, when Luo Binghe is still a teenager, it’s easier to land on the side of just adoring him. The original canon character was a sweet, sweet kid all on his own. And Luo Binghe is still an extremely good boy when this novel starts, even though he’s being mistreated by his teacher and most of his fellow disciples. But when Shen Qingqiu starts giving him support and positive reinforcement, oh my god, he BLOOMS.

But Shen Qingqiu is from outside the novel, and he knows where this is headed eventually. And at the point where the original character shoved Luo Binghe into the abyss for a couple years of misery, the new Shen Qingqiu thinks he’s in a damned if you do, damned if you don’t situation, and... reluctantly does the same thing.

So here’s the trouble. Luo Binghe is... needy. He’s a needy, needy boy. He loves very hard and cares about his people (person) a lot, but he is also clingy as heck, jealous, and has MASSIVE abandonment issues. Getting this treatment from his favorite person in the entire universe is... not ideal. Having it happen when he’s just found out he’s half demon is even less ideal, especially when the framing makes it look like he’s being rejected because of What He Is, not something he has any power to change. And it ties back into to his oldest, most painful insecurities. His name literally means ‘lowered into the icy river’, because that’s what his birth mother did with him.

So when he comes back to the human realm, he’s not as blackened as he was in canon, and doesn’t have a grudge of the same magnitude as the original Luo Binghe. But the person he loves most in the world hurt him very, very badly, and he :) has :) some :) questions :))))))))))))))

And this is the point where every time Luo Binghe breathes, Shen Qingqiu goes WAUGHHHH

Which is so TASTY, honestly! And the escalation of hurt and mistrust is such a delicious feedback loop! I love a good supportive relationship, but I live for two people who care about each other inadvertently inflicting massive wounds on each other’s hearts.

I don’t want to go into describing the later parts of the plot, because that seems like such a waste, but I feel like transmigration stories are the MOST tasty if having prior knowledge of a novel’s plot makes the leads act as dumbasses in all kinds of new and exciting ways. Which definitely, definitely applies here.

And there are all kinds of DELICIOUS side relationships, which weren’t there in the original canon, and that Shen Qingqiu accidentally discovers/uncovers while he’s fumbling around trying to dodge his canon fate. Like, early in the book, Shen Qingqiu is supposed to kill one of his peers in the sect. The guy was suffering from a qi deviation and the original Shen Qingqiu was like ‘look, he was out of control, and I didn’t want to kill him, but it was him or me.’ Everyone was skeptical, but they didn’t have any evidence to contradict him. This character was the brother of one of Luo Binghe’s eventual wives, so it was pretty much just another bonus reason to hate his shizun once he turned against him.

The new Shen Qingqiu is like ‘okay, so this Liu Qingge is supposed to be strong. Maybe if I save his life he’ll protect me from Luo Binghe?’ And it changes SO MUCH! And Shen Qingqiu is SO DUMB! He’s like ‘wow, liu qingge really hates me, huh.’ And Liu Qingge is like ‘WHY ARE YOU BEING NICE. IT’S WEIRD. ARE YOU REALLY STILL YOURSELF?’ And then later there are spoilery developments, but there’s this act of devotion that moves me so much. (five years!!!!!!!!!!)

And I don’t want to undersell the intense emotions these characters are so frequently feeling in this story, but they are also. so dumb. so frequently, frequently dumb. and I live for it.

Like, I just got past the part in the novel where Shen Qingqiu sees Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan having their first conversation. Liu Mingyan is a legendary beauty (so beautiful she wears a veil, because otherwise her beauty is just too distracting) and eventually becomes one of Luo Binghe’s favorite wives. So Shen Qingqiu (who hates the original novel, but also sure has a lot of passion for it and remembers a lot of the details, considering how much he theoretically hates it) is like ‘OH, HOT DAMN. MY OTP’S FIRST CONVERSATION. I WANNA SEE HOW THIS GOES.’

And what happens is that Luo Binghe gets so massively jealous. We get a bit of his pov, where almost all of his thoughts are ‘WHY IS SHIZUN STILL LOOKING AT HER?? IT’S NOT LIKE YOU CAN SEE MUCH PAST THE VEIL ANYWAYS. AND ANYWAYS, I’M PRETTIER???????????????’ And finally Luo Binghe goes off out of sight with her so shizun can’t watch her anymore, and Shen Qingqiu is like ‘ah.... alas....... of course the protagonist and his lady get privacy for such an important scene..............’

They are so dumb, guys. They care so much, and they ache so much over each other, and they are so dumb. And the supporting cast isn’t much smarter. Even the smart ones have the dumb ones inflicted on them.

In the extras, at one point demon king Luo Binghe is addressing his main retainers, and he’s like ‘if... hypothetically..... two people’s hearts were out of alignment with each other........ how would u fix that.......... hypothetically..............’ And his poor retainers are like

But I really, really think that the protagonist being afraid of the love interest is a really key point for me, personally. And then it’s extra my favorite, because of 1) him having a good fucking reason to be afraid, and 2) his love interest having no goddamn clue. It makes for such a good blend of humor and sincere pathos. I’m weak to dumbasses-in-love as a dynamic, but it can be hard to have something so lighthearted while also working in painful emotional depths. The premise for this story is hard to replicate, and I’m kind of drawing a blank on anything that I’ve read that measures up to it, and the plot REALLY makes the use of some incredible foundations.

Anyways, thank you for coming to my ted talk, this book is ridiculous and i love it, and it’s also the shortest and most linear of mxtx’s books, and i highly recommend it to everyone.

#svsss #long post/#guess who doesn't want to go back to her workday #it meee

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daughtercfair · 3 years

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💞 five ways natalie says that she loves you 💞 ~ @xlaurelxandxcitrinex

under the cut for long post but here

Amélie

the very first way that natalie shows her love for her mother is by going places with her mom as well as for her mom. need someone to go to the store? she’ll go with you miss. dad forgot his lunch? oh miss natalie is going to take it on over. just wanting someone to hang out for a bit. she’s there. even if it’s just to watch movies on the couch.

she remembers things for her. look being a waitress on top of being a mother and wife and doing things outside of all of that ( ie therapy, but also doing things outside of that too like visiting grandpa and random acts of good ) might be stressful, but natalie always leaves little reminders around the house of dates or things that they are out of. as well as notes reminding her to take a break. take moments for herself. you can usually tell if it’s from natalie judging by the blue sticky notes.

something that natalie has done ever since she was a kid was write her mom a book every single mothers day. those books became letters both about things that she’s thankful for that amelie has provided and done for her as well as paragraphs on how much she looks up to her and how wonderful she is to her.

whenever natalie goes anywhere that she might see them, she get’s amelie flowers. always red. usually in big bouquets.

the verbal love you’s come in a few ways. they come mumbled in hugs before school. in goodnight calls. but the loudest and most genuine times that they are are when they are just talking, alone. sometimes in a car. sometimes on a couch. or on a hospital bed, but they come out of nowhere. they are still the truth.

Nino

everyday that he works the ghost train, natalie comes by afterschool ( or at noon if there is no school) . if it’s dead, she will ride it again and again until folks start showing up. she pitches ideas on how to improve the train and later comes up with a way to fundraise a way to update it while keeping it the same cheesy, timey experience as it was before. she always buys him a carnival snack on those nights.

whenever there is some kind of important event, she takes a photo and send it to him if for whatever reason he isn’t there. especially with henry. when there is something to announce they do it with photos too ( proposal. babies. college. etc. ).

father’s day gifts for nino have always comprised of the same things : candy, a handmade card, a torn up photos, some of them her own photos that she’s taken, some found. all of them she has poured effort into.

hugs. natalie is not often one to like being hugged or initiate hugs, but she very much so has always responded both quickly to her dad’s hugs and sometimes hugged him first. especially after the incident of spilled coffee ( you know what i am talking about ).

verbal i love you’s are a little different than they are with nino’s wife. certainly there are the mumble ‘ love you too’s ’ from time to time. they can often be found in cards though. letters. texts. voicemails. much like amelie they can come in moments of silence, but more often she says them in the moments of deep fear or deep pride or excitement when the words will come out. a way of saying thanks... for a thousand things, really, most that she can’t even begin to thank him or her mom for but she tries in those three words.

Nova

this is cheesy as shit but the first impression. natalie is TERRIFIED of nova. this is a person who, by the sounds like her complete opposite but has somehow gotten the affection of her brother who isn’t attracted to anyone. the moment natalie sees nova ( with exception of a FEW au’s, but in those ones the same applies to this after they have talked a few times ) she relaxes just a little and lets down her guard. she smiles and gives her her blessing. verbally.

touch. now this is kinda a strange one, i know, but natalie is not a touchy person. at all. in most au’s we both know nova is, but natalie never shies away from it. after a while she even hugs nova first, or links arms with her. it just comes... natural. it works. she trusts her.

playing dress up. natalie HATES and i mean HATES most of nova’s fashion sense being applied to herself. she does not only let nova dress her up, but actually suggusts her give her wardrobe or self a makeover whenever she notices she’s having a rough day. she may be a bit different then her, but she trusts her not to make her too uncomfortable. ...for the most part at least.

going out. now this might be natalie PARTIPATING in the going out as in drinking and being fun in that way or being the driver natalie goes out with nova most of the time she asks. she knows nova won’t let her go off the deepend.

i feel like, for friends especially, there can sometime some fear that comes with saying the words i love you. at least there is for natalie. there’s such a heaviness and weight to the words. if you say them to someone who doesn’t recprocate then it’s just awkward. this is why i feel like natalie says the words literally in goodbyes, the ‘ i ’part of it missing ( “ love you, see you soon ” ). there’s a desperatness to the words. a please don’t loose faith in me yet. the biggest words of love, though, come in a single word instead : sister.

Gabe

this is something that wavers from time to time BUT i would like to say that natalie, for most of her life makes an effort to go to everything that gabe is involved in. even when she can’t be visibly seen by him. i promise you. she’s probably there.

family traditions. pillow forts. snowball fights. trip to the grocery store to pick up a movie and shit food. christmas boxes... these are all to be honored when they come up. no exceptions. even if you have a rocky relationship....

even when they were little, natalie has always gone to gabe with whatever question she had. homework problem? go to gabe. curious about some random thing that there is no way he would know? meh. better check with the big bro. i say this because i feel like there is a trusting element in questions and a sincerity in the ones she asks. more often then not she asks him, “ are you okay? ” or “ how are you? ” and actually means it. it’s a worrying. Actual. Genuine concern for him.

okay. i am not going to list off every single moment that it comes up in everything we have ever plotted out B U T she would do anything for her brother. be it getting killed or killing. she just wants to make sure that he is safe and okay and happy. thank you.

now for actual i love you’s. okay well... here’s the thing about ACTUAL i love you’s. they came a lot when she was younger. then they halted for a few years. but i feel like, at least in the “ canon ” gabe lives verse they are a mix of the three i love you’s above and the very first one that comes is when she leaves after dropping everything to get him kick started on rehab. they are desperate. they are in the middle of nowhere. sometimes in exciting moments but i feel like those are less common. usually it’s just “ i love you moonbeam. ” then a smile or a ruffle of his hair. i feel like more than anything they are said in goodbyes in phone calls though.

Peter

okay i am going to say one word. tenderness. natalie is someone who treats peter with extreme gentleness and caution. this is beyond her stressor about love. natalie very much so reads peter’s few words about his past and move from there with caution. more over she is one who actually initiates touch first at times. she knows when to talk and when to swallow her worries down when something comes up and she wants to ask a question about it and just be there but she tries. she isn’t gentle by nature but she is soft with him.

trying new things for the sake his enjoyment as well as taking risks. natalie is not a risk taker. that is something that we both know very well, but she takes a leap of faith. she trusts him and stays with him for the sake of being with him.

there’s a lot of words that can be said in a hand hold. you can say a follow me! or a stop moving! or a get behind me. but whenever she feels off or senses that she feels off, she is always quick to grab his hand and squeeze it tightly. she’ll thumb at his palms or kiss his hand or draw him closer but that is one way that she says she loves him.

she offers advice. i wanted to include one that could be more platonic since we have some there but natalie is someone who doesn’t trust herself too much, nor does she think that she has all that meaningful of feedback, BUT she always offers suggestions to peter on what to do or how to calm down. without hesitation.

i love you’s. they are whispered. they are honestly said a lot more repeated, said more than once with an action ( kissing cheek, rubbing at scars, counting something or humming some random song). they are usually said with the sunsetting. they are reminders. they are comforting words. they are begging to stay and trust. and they are just there. constant. warm.

Henry

she thinks about henry first ( MOST! OF THE TIME! ). at least in her own mind she does. which is why i am talking about this here and what she really was doing. i very much so think natalie was pushing henry away after the events of wish i were here and i think that wish i were here was very much so her trying to scare henry away and then when that didn’t work and he was still there natalie settled for trying to push him away. that was her attempt to save him from what she assumed would become a mess of her life. this is of course wrong, but she’s trying. even when they first get together she is trying to push him away as much as she has feelings BECAUSE she’s scared of what he’ll do if he’s pulled into her life, into her family.

to concur this, though, she doesn’t lie to henry. no matter what she is feeling or thinking she says it. she may try to hide things, but she doesn’t lie about it if directly asked. she may change the subject but she doesn’t lie outright. after hey 3, she doesn’t lie. at all.

natalie smiles and laughs around henry. natalie isn’t one to genuinely smile or laugh around people. ever. he makes her feel relaxed, like she can just be herself and that just. smiling. laughing. relaxing around him. even joking back that’s one way she says she loves him back.

there’s an intimacy that comes with eye contact. natalie is someone who doesn’t make eye contact with people. she does look at henry a lot though. and she doesn’t break that eyecontact unless she is hiding something or trying to push him away. ( further i think that they are good at non-verbal communication thanks ).

verbal i love you’s.... listen. i feel like they aren’t easily said from natalie’s mouth ( i very much so think that the very first time natalie says it is once he gets her home from the dance / hey 3 ) but when they do happen they are soft and spoken softly, almost as though she’s scared he’ll get taken away the moment the words leave her mouth and is just close him and the sentence is said in full. and it’s steady. firm. certain. happy. “ i love you. ”

#: )#have this #cherish it #hold it clse #it's soft and good #xlaurelxandxcitrinex #AMELIE : xlaurelxandxcitrinex #NINO : xlaurelxandxcitrinex #NOVA : xlaurelxandxcitrinex #GABE: xlaurelxandxcitrinex #&PETER : xlaurelxandxcitrinex #&HENRY : xlaurelxandxcitrinex #can i hide my stupid hunger? : headcanons

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benhardyisdaddy · 5 years

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my plus one - part 1

MASTERLIST

(this is the first chap and i REALLY want feedback from u guys if u like it and if i should continue it or not!!! i have so many idea lmaoooo)

Word Count: 1,220

Description: you need a date to your sister’s week long wedding event and you know just who to take

Your last relationship ended about eight months ago with a man you were with for four years. Four of the best years of your life - that is until he cheated on you with a girl from your work. It shattered your heart and destroyed any hope in you that believed love was real. To you, now, it was a scam and was meant for one of you to get hurt. Usually, that meant you. The scars on your heart were still healing, but bled open again when you got unexpected news only three months into your breakup.

“I’m sorry,” you say slowly. “You’re what?”

You’re sitting in front of your sister at her house while she dropped a bomb on you.

“Alex and I are… Well, we’re dating. A couple.”

You couldn’t process what you were hearing. This had to be fake. She would surely break her serious front and begin belly laughing at how ridiculous that would be. You waited with wide eyes, but it never came. She was as serious as before. She wasn’t lying.

“You and… And my ex are… Dating? You’re dating Alex?” you ask, your voice getting higher.

You make a disgusted face as you stand up quickly and feel yourself beginning to hyperventilate. You begin pacing back and forth, trying to wrap your mind around this. She stands up quickly and holds her hands up in defense.

“Sis, listen, it’s not like it was planned.” she says cautiously, scared to fuel the fire even more.

“You and Alex!?” you whisper, rubbing your hands against your thighs in an attempt to calm down.

It didn’t work. You hunch over and take in a deep breath, suddenly feeling sick. You stand up and shake your head fast.

“My ex who I was with for four years!” you whisper once more. “You saw how bad I was when we broke up. You said all of those things about him! You called him a no good pig, for Christ’s sake!”

“Y/n, please calm down. I’m so sorry. You have no idea how sorry I am.

“Well apparently not!” you shout. “You’re still with him! You and Alex!” you say once more.

Your sister stares at you with pleading eyes. They were glossy and threatened to spill.

“Please don’t hate me.” she whispers, her voice shaky.

You sarcastically laugh as you narrow your eyes and shake your head.

“Oh, no! Ellie, don’t you dare make me feel bad for you! It won’t work this time!”

Ellie shuts her eyes and exhales as you hurry over to her front door and grab your coat.

“I actually can’t believe you would do something this low. And here I thought we were best friends.”

And with that, you slammed the door behind you.

***

Now, five months after finding out about them, you get another call you were least expecting. You had just made it inside your apartment when your phone began ringing. You place your groceries down in a hurry and rush to it. You know the number on the screen. It’s your sister. You close your eyes and take in a deep breath before answering.

“Hello?”

“Y/n? It’s Ellie.”

You roll your eyes in annoyance.

“I know who you are. My phone clearly states it when you call.”

There’s an awkward silence. You huff and run a hand through your hair.

“What is it, El?” you ask fast.

“You’re my sister,” she starts.

“Barely.” you spat without thinking about it.

You can hear her sigh as you almost regret saying that.

“You’re my sister, so please think about what I’m about to tell you. Okay?”

You look around your apartment and try to think of an excuse to get off the phone, but you’ve got nothing.

“What is it?”

“Well…” she pauses. “Alex and I are getting married.”

Your heart falls. Your legs feel wobbly as you practically fall onto your couch for support.

“Married?” you whisper.

“I know. It’s so fast and we’ve only been dating for a short while-”

“And he’s my ex.”

The tension is thick and you can’t stop making it worse.

“I’m so sorry, y/n.” she says sincerely. “I was calling to ask you to be my maid of honor. Please? It would mean so much to me.”

You tense your jaw as you fight back a huge laugh. She’s really asking you to be apart of her wedding with your ex? You have to say no. You have to say no.

“Okay.”

What!?

“Oh my gosh!” she squeals. “You have no idea how much that means to me, sis. We’re doing this week long event in Hawaii for it. Don’t worry, I’m getting you and your plus one a ticket! I’ll send you all of the details, okay?”

You lean your head forward and force yourself to smile.

“Can’t wait.”

***

Your plus one. Your plus one. That thought keeps running around your head as you think about it all day. You can’t go to your sister's wedding alone. Especially a wedding with your ex. How pathetic would that look? You’d be laughed at. Or worse, people would sadly smile every time they look at you, because they know what had happened. That can’t happen. But don’t worry, you know the perfect person to ask. You dial the number and wait several seconds before they pick up.

“Hello?”

“Roger!” you say excitedly. “How’s my best friend doing? You well?” you ask.

“You were just here an hour ago. Why? Something’s wrong. You sound weird.”

You frown hard as you walk to your bedroom and sit on the bed.

“I have some awesome news for you.” you say sarcastically. “Ellie’s getting married.”

“What!?” he asks shocked. “How’s that good news!?”

Your face falls.

“It was a joke, Rog. It’s the worst news I could have ever gotten and I’m torn between going or moving to a new continent so they can’t find me.”

You lay down on your bed as Roger softly laughs.

“Can I come with?” he asks.

You smile at his eagerness to run away with you.

“Always. But my runaway plans aren’t why I called you. I need you to do something for me.”

“Oh no, no, no. If it’s another one of your blind dates, then no! I’ve had enough of your weird friends for a lifetime.”

“Alright, first off, rude! Secondly, my friends are awesome. And third, it’s not that. How would you like an all paid vacation to Hawaii?” you ask with fake excitement.

“What’s the catch?” he asks.

“You really do know me.” you tease. “The catch is that it’s for Ellie’s wedding! Yay!” you cheer out.

“Oh, no. Please don’t ask me that.”

“Oh, c’mon, Rog! I need a date! I can’t go alone and you’re the only guy I trust! Pleeeeeease!” you beg loudly.

Roger groans a bit until he gives in.

“Okay, fine! I’ll go to your sister’s weird ass wedding with you. But only for you. Not for her.”

You grin hard as you thank him repeatedly.

“I promise you, you’re not going to regret this! Love ya!” you tell him, causing him to laugh.

“Love ya too.”

You both hang up as you stare at your phones and sigh.

“I’m so going to regret this.” he says.

“He’s so going to regret this.”

Tag List: @sweet-pink-lady @deaconsposts @westansstuff @sammy-1998 @jazzman-19 @yourlocalmusicalprostitute @sevenseasofryheisthequeen

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#benhardyisdaddy #roger taylor #rogertaylor #ben!rogertaylor #rogertaylorxy/n #benhardy!rogertaylor #angst #comedy #wedding #my plus one #part 1 #cheating #friends to lovers #drama #queen #borhap #roger taylor x reader

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louhooo · 5 years

Text

Hello My Old Heart | Chap. 5

Chapter Summary: Dinner with Nat and Clint... kinda

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader [AU]

Warnings: Angst, (but like, only a lil’) swearing, mentions of drinking, LOTS OF EMOTIONS

A/N: Girl is early this week! Another short chapter, also, dialogue with Clint is italicized

Feedback is always appreciated!!

Monday was a bust.

You answered when Steve called, but then fell right back asleep until it was time to eat dinner. You cleaned yourself up enough to go through the drive-thru and get something to eat, then retreated back to your room. It wasn’t long after finishing your food that you fell back asleep until morning. You managed to pull yourself out of bed Tuesday afternoon to shower and get ready for dinner with Clint and Nat.

During your junior year of high school, your family moved away, and you refused to move with them. It was the first time you stood up for yourself, and didn’t simply “go along” with what your family wanted. You had people that loved you unconditionally, and you weren’t about to leave them.

Bucky and all your friends asked their parents, but it was the same answer across the board: “It sucks, but Y/N should move with her family.”

Despite how dumb he could be, Clint was incredibly smart, and was able to graduate early his senior year. He had been living on his own since he was eighteen, and had been working with George on his construction crew until Steve and Bucky graduated. They had made some weird pack in middle school to wait until Steve and Bucky were out of high school, too, before joining the fire department.

Clint was like an older brother to you, and you knew he would never let anything bad happen to you, and you would do the same. When he asked you if you wanted to live with him, you cried for hours and Clint thought he broke you. He kept asking what he could do to make you stop crying no matter how many times you tried explaining they were happy tears.

You both worked in tandem with each other, and you never really fought about anything, other than who was supposed to cook dinner that night, but that usually just ended in someone throwing a frozen pizza in the oven.

You got to the house early, surprised to see Clint already home. He told you he got the day off, and the most productive thing he’d done all day was shower. You weren’t really doing any better, but didn’t bring it up. He’d just tell Nat later on and then you’d have to deal with that.

He pulled you onto the couch with him, and you watched Dateline until Nat showed up. That’s when it turned into her not so subtly yelling at you both for being so quiet with your feelings and not sharing them with the people you needed to. She huffed and stalked into the kitchen and you heard pans and pots clanging around.

What did you do? You signed to Clint. He sighed and ran a hand down his face.

I brought up proposing to her with Sam and Steve, and Steve and his big ass mouth, blabbed it to Sharon. Sharon told Nat and now she’s pissed off at me.

Proposing?! You kept smacking his arm until he caught your hand and gave you wide eyed and annoyed look. Why didn’t you tell me? He gave you a skeptical look, that made you roll your eyes and flip him off, which only made him laugh.

“What are you two laughing at?!” You shared a look and both stopped laughing and sank into the couch. You heard Nat mumbling in Russian, so you figured it best to not piss her off any more than she was.

At some point, Nat nagged just one time too many and you left and drove to Nick’s. You thought everything was fine and dandy, but alcohol has a tendency to do that. You felt someone tap on your arm, and you turned and saw your favorite police officer. You threw your arms around him.

“Sam! What’re you doing here?!” Sam chuckled and pulled you apart.

“Well, I heard there was a possible public intox.” You looked around, spinning ungracefully in a circle. You looked back up at him and shook your head.

“I don’t see anybody, but if I do, I’ll make sure to call you.” He pursed his lips.

“Well, Y/N, I think the public intox might be you.” You gasped, shocked.

“What?! No….” He nodded his head with his lips still pursed.

“Why don’t I drive you to your hotel and walk you to your room, okay?” You waved him off and grabbed your keys, getting into your car.

“I’m fin–”

“Y/N, if you start that car, I’m gonna have to take you in.” You stared at him shocked, and slightly amused at how much he sounded like a cop.

“You wouldn’t! I’m not in-toxicated, Sam-u-el!”

“Y/N,” he warned, “don’t make me do it.”

“You’re free to go.” You looked up and watched Sam open the cell. You were trying to bore holes into his him, but it was pointless. He raised a brow. “You’re not so scary right now, kid. Now, let’s go.” He held his hand out for you, which you accepted only after you stumbled slightly while standing up. You watched Sam bite his lip to keep himself from laughing, and if you weren’t currently in a jail cell, you’d elbow him for it.

Sam led you out to the front office, the lighting casting a yellow tint to everything, including the very disappointed looking face standing on the other side of the counter.

You looked down at your feet, embarrassment hitting you like a truck. “Hi, Bucky….” You spoke quietly. He gave a throaty sigh.

“Here’s her purse. I gave her some Advil about an hour ago, and she’s been drinking water since she got here.”

“Thanks, Sam. I owe ya one.” Sam huffed a laugh. “Let’s go, Y/N.” You shuffled behind him outside to his truck. He opened the passenger door and helped you in, setting your purse down by your feet. “Buckle up.” You did as you were told, and he shut the door and walked around and got into the driver’s seat.

He put both of his hands on the steering wheel and stared out the windshield, “Is this a common night for you?” You pinched your brows and looked at him. He glanced at you when you didn’t answer. “Drinking. Do you get drunk a lot of nights?” You quickly shook your head and he stared you down.

“I don’t. Really. This week is the most I’ve drank in a while.” He continued to look at you.

“Why? Why is it every time I’ve seen you since you got here you’re drunk or hungover?”

“Well, in my defense, I didn’t exactly plan on seeing you tonight….” He growled softly and you grimaced, looking down at your lap.

“Why did you even go to Fury’s tonight? I thought you were having dinner with Nat and Clint.” You fidgeted with the loose thread on your shirt.

“Nat kept yelling at me, so I left.” You noticed his posture shift out of the corner of your eye.

“Yelling about what?” His voice was softer.

“That I was being childish; that I’m being childish now. That I expect too much out of you to then not give anything back. That I need to grow up and talk to you without running away.” It always seems to be easier to have serious conversations, late at night, in a car. The silence was deafening. “I know she’s right.” Bucky sighed through his nose, his hands dropping to his lap.

“I want you to remember what I say this time, so let’s wait until morning when you’re sober.” You looked over at him, your brows burrowing.

“What? What did you say that I don’t remember?” His mouth parted slightly, like he just realized he said something he shouldn’t have.

“N-nothing.” You shook your head, turning your body to face him.

“No. You said you want me to remember this time. What did we talk about?” His eyes scanned over you and he opened and closed his mouth multiple times. You tried to remember any part of Friday night, but the last thing you could remember was Bucky carrying you inside the house. He finally sighed.

“I said I was sorry. That I should’ve brought you home and I should’ve been there for you when you needed me. You needed me and-and I… left you.” He whispered. You felt water drops hit your hand.

“I pushed you too much. I expected you to feel everything exactly as I did, and I couldn’t understand when you didn’t.” You unbuckled your seatbelt and leaned forward, wiping away the tears from his face, comforting him still being your knee-jerk reaction. He caught your wrist and held your hand to his face, the tears pouring.

You pulled back enough to put the center console up and crawled closer to him, holding him as he cried, your own tears sliding down your face. He tried talking through his sobs, but you couldn’t understand his murmurs, so you just carded your fingers through his hair, the action soothing both of you.

“I need you, Y/N.” Bucky’s voice startled you. Your tears had dried and the early dawn was starting in the sky. His head was still on your chest, and your fingers had long been combed into his hair. He sat up slowly, taking your hands in his. “I need you.” You studied him, the sincerity of his statement hanging in the air.

“Do you work today?” He shook his head, his face noticeably tired, you’re sure, matching your own. You squeezed his hands, “Let’s finish talking after we get some sleep.” He closed his eyes and breathed out through his nose. He nodded faintly. “The hotel is closer. We can sleep there.” His eyes opened and he looked at you.

“What?”

“What, what?” He blinked.

“You want me to go with?” You sighed softly.

“We’re tired, and I don’t want you to drive home by yourself when you’re this tired.” His face fell just a fraction, but a noticeable amount. “And…” you took a breath, “because I need you, too, James, but I’m just not ready yet.” He nodded his head earnestly. This was good, Bucky thought, a step in the right direction, at least.

“Alright. Let’s go get some sleep.” You separated and clicked your seatbelts and drove in peaceful silence back to the hotel. You went through the back entrance and climbed the flight of stairs to get to your hotel room. You slid the card, the mechanism beeping in acceptance, and you opened the door and stepped in, the coolness of the AC hitting you.

You shut the door behind him, a small sliver of light coming through the curtains, and toed off your shoes. Bucky stood there, slowly peeling off his jacket and placing it on top of the dresser. You unhooked your bra, taking it out of your sleeve, leaving on your leggings and shirt you’d worn to dinner. He stared at you as you got into bed.

“Unless you’ve stopped sweating in your sleep, I know you only sleep in your boxers. I don’t care.” You heard him sigh, then the sound of his zipper.

“I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable,” he explained.

“Neither do I.” Especially when you feel you don’t completely deserve his forgiveness. He crawled into the other side of the bed, both of you on your sides facing one another. His body heat was like a magnet and you felt yourself being pulled towards him, but resisted.

“Do you have plans today?” You shook your head as much as you could lying down. He hummed in acknowledgment. Your eyelids started getting heavier, and soon enough, they were too heavy to keep open. You felt something skim across the side of your hand and didn’t think twice about grabbing his hand before he could pull it away.

Your fingers interlaced, and you felt his tension dissolve. You both drifted off to sleep, hope not ready to let you go.

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minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong · 5 years

Text

Sweet Dreams Chapter Six

Lucid dreaming: The process of being aware that one is dreaming. Some researchers believe that in lucid dreaming, the individual may be able to change the outcome of the dream or control their degree of participation in the imaginary (dream) environment.

Description: Lee Eunbyul has been plagued with hellish nightmares since she was a child. Not the sort of nightmares you may be familiar with. There are no monsters to evade, no serial killers to outrun, no auditoriums of classmates in front of whom to stand naked. Instead there is just…darkness. Endless darkness. With professional help, the dreams come less frequently. But after moving away from home to live with her sister, Eunbyul’s nightmare returns, only this time it’s different. This time…she’s not alone.

What would you do if you had the chance to change the outcome of not only your dreams, but your life?

Genre: Romance, Drama, Fluff, Angst, Slow Burn

Pairing: Namjoon x (f) OC

Word Count: 7.2k

Tags: Non-Idol!Au, Producer!Namjoon, Bookstore Clerk!Seokjin, Potter!Jimin, Producer!Yoongi, Dancer!Hoseok

Warnings: Frequent mentions of mental illness, infrequent swearing and mentions of alcohol

A/N: Hey guys! Here’s the newest chapter~ I hope you guys are enjoying this series! I’m really enjoying writing it. This chapter in particular was v fun to write. Anyway, I hope everybody is resting enough these days! Please don’t be shy and send feedback, critique, questions, theories, and comments my way. I’ll be sure to respond to all asks I receive within a day of receiving them!

And again, if you want to follow my Twitter, my username is @/plzpunchmebts. I’m super active over there and hopefully in the future I’ll do some livestreams/chats with you all!

- Mercury

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Weekly updates: Sunday, 1PM (PST)

Namjoon

“K-i-m-N-a-m-j-o-o-n-.”

I startled a little and rubbed my eyes, squinting at the person who’d roused my attention. Jisoo stood beside my desk, furry brows raised. It had been a few days since he’d bothered to check on me, and seeing the look on his face now I was sure he regretted not coming sooner.

“Been trying to get you to notice for a minute, dude,” he said, patting my shoulder as he raised a mug of hot coffee to his lips. He stared over my shoulder at the monitor before me. “You making good progress with the commercial soundtrack?”

I swallowed hard and stared at the half-finished track on Cubase. Uninspired. The project window was home to several presets from the preloaded packs on the software, nothing like what I’d use at home on my own. It sounded fine so far, or as fine as it could. But there was no heart in it, not really. Instead, it sounded as hollow as it did commercial. I was sure the client would like it. What concerned me, really, was finding the strength to finish it.

“Uh, yeah. Should be done by tomorrow,” I said, and even my voice was lackluster. I pinched my nose bridge and rubbed circles, squeezing my eyes shut.

“You okay?” asked Jisoo, but it was clear from his tone that he was only halfway interested.

“Yeah, fine,” I said, waving a hand. “I’m cool. Just…tired I guess.”

He hummed. “Gotta sleep well if you wanna be a producer.”

I nodded, but couldn’t help but think of Yoongi. He was working as a real producer, and there wasn’t a single night in recent memory when I could remember him going to sleep before the sun rose.

“Thanks, Boss,” I said, offering a smile.

He patted my shoulder. “Take care of yourself, okay? We can’t afford to lose you,” he said with a laugh. It was the uneasy sort of chuckle you give someone when you want them to reassure you.

I nodded. “I don’t have anywhere else to go anyway,” I said as he smiled and walked back out to the floor. I sighed and again pinched my nose bridge.

“Hey,” said Jungkook from his desk, staring at me with knitted brows. “You really don’t look so good.”

I smiled and waved my hand. “Don’t worry about me.”

“Saying that makes me more worried,” he said, resting a round cheek in his hand. “What’s going on with you? For real?”

I inhaled sharply and sighed, shutting my eyes. “Just…I dunno, I feel kinda sick today I guess. Haven’t been sleeping well, and I woke up…forget it, alright? I’m fine.”

“No, keep going,” said Jungkook, and coming from anyone else I might have thought he was teasing me. But this was Jungkook anyway, and he only seemed to know how to be sincere. He kept his eyes on me.

I shrugged. “Woke up kinda sad.”

Jungkook raised his brows. “Huh?”

“Forget it.”

He shook his head. “No reason for it?”

I thought a moment, puzzled. “Well…it’s not like usual, you know? Like when you just feel sad and you can’t really diagnose it,” I said, nodding. “It feels like there’s something really important that I’m missing.”

Jungkook hummed. “Maybe it has to do with work?” he offered, tilting his head with a sigh. “We all know working here isn’t your number one choice.”

I quieted down, staring at the project on my screen with furrowed brow. While I was sure it wasn’t something so simple, that the real cause was still evading me, his words unsettled me. “Maybe…,” I said, shaking my head.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out my cell phone, typing a message as quickly as I could before returning to the track.

Namjoon: Hey, Hoseok. Haven’t seen you in a few weeks. Wanna go to the beach?

Hoseok: huhuhu…u gonna collect crabs the whole time?

Namjoon: …

Namjoon: Crabs are fascinating…

Hoseok: looooooooooooool

Hoseok: nerd

Hoseok: i’m in either way :-D

I sat crouched on the shore, poking my index finger into the little holes I saw along the sand. Every now and then, something would bulge and shift beneath the sand’s surface, a sign of life. Smiling, I worked my thumb beneath one of the bumps.

“I thought I said no crabs,” grumbled Hoseok as he licked his popsicle. The thing was already staining his tongue and lips violet.

I hummed as I grabbed a small crab from under the wet sand. “You did say that,” I said with a chuckle as I smoothed the pad of my finger along the crab’s back. I flipped it over in my hand and presented it to Hoseok. “See this plate right here?” I asked, pointing to the smooth shell of the crab’s stomach. “That means it’s a female!”

“I don’t care,” said Hoseok with a heavy sigh.

He leaned back on his palms, three separate leashes hooked around his wrists. The dogs themselves were behaving well enough. The golden retriever was resting his blonde head against his paw, eyebrows shifting as he looked around the beach. The collie panted beneath the unrelenting sun, laying on her stomach with her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth. And the pug simply sat on Hoseok’s lap, eyes shut.

I set the crab back down and crawled over to where Hoseok sat with his legs extended in front of him, taking up an entire blanket by himself. I smiled and collapsed beside his thigh. “Feels good to get out.”

Hoseok sighed and, with his free hand, gave my upper arm a firm smack. “Because you never get out to begin with,” he scolded.

I laughed. “Not all of us can be dog walkers.”

He rolled his eyes. “You don’t have what it takes,” he said with a sigh, biting off a chunk from his melting popsicle. “Endurance, perseverance, patience, understanding-,”

“Are you saying you have all of those things?” I teased, glancing at him over my shoulder. I laughed as he reached a hand out to hit me again. “Sorry!”

As my laughter died down, I felt Hoseok’s gaze boring into my skin and, uneasy, I turned to face him properly. His narrow eyes seized on me, scrutinizing. “You seem weird,” he remarked with a cocked brow.

I inhaled quick, ready to refute him, but as soon as I met his inquiring eyes my breath escaped in a sigh end I rubbed my forehead. “I’m…not myself lately.”

He patted my back with an open palm. “Anything I can do?”

I shook my head. “I don’t think so,” I said. “It’s been building for a few days. Things just…aren’t settling right for some reason. In my head, I mean.”

“Hm…,” began Hoseok, chomping down on his popsicle as he gazed out at the waves. “I wonder if there’s one cause.”

“Probably not,” I said with a soft smile. “Never is just one thing.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m fine,” I said, nodding once as I swept my eyes out across the glittering ocean horizon. “Honestly.”

“Mhm,” said Hoseok as the pug on his lap stretched, letting out a yawn. He rubbed its back, a fond smile on his face. “You know, dogs are pretty clever.”

“Huh?” I asked, turning to face him.

He chuckled and nodded. “Might not look like it right now,” he said with a pointed look at the panting collie. “But they’ve got shit figured out.”

I smiled. “How so?”

“Well…for one thing, they understand the value of a pack. A close circle to watch their backs,” he said, nodding. “They’re loyal, won’t ever intentionally hurt someone they love.”

“I guess.”

“They’re honest.”

I raised my brows, eyeing him. “Hm?”

He was still stroking the sleepy pug’s back, smiling gently. “They don’t know how to be any other way. They don’t know how to pretend.” He lifted only his eyes to meet mine. “When they’re upset, they can’t lie and say they aren’t.”

I stiffened. “Well…they can’t speak.”

He laughed. “That’s not what I mean,” he said, easily leaning back on his palm once more, watching as sugary purple syrup began trailing down his forearm. “They can’t put on a brave face and go about their day like nothing’s wrong. When a dog’s upset, they howl. And they keep howling until they feel better.”

I exhaled slowly. His words weren’t lost on me. I knew well what he was trying to say. And as I took a look at him over my shoulder, I could see from the way his eyes implored me how deeply he wanted me to understand. I gave a smile and nodded.

“Sometimes you gotta just let yourself howl, Joon,” he said, lifting the dripping remains of his popsicle to his mouth and biting it whole. He pocketed the messy stick — much to my dismay — and patted his legs, moving the pug so he could stand. “What do you say I show you someplace cool?”

Me, Hoseok, and three panting dogs enter a pottery store, I thought to myself as Hoseok began calling for the quaint shop’s owner, like bulls in a china shop. The dogs took to sniffing every crevice and corner they could reach, pushing damp noses against delicate pots, pawing at shelf legs, scratching the many ornate rugs on the floor. I watched with a cringe as the golden retriever began jumping beside one of the organized shelves, likely trying to explore the higher levels.

Hoseok corrected the dog with a soft jerk of the leash and continued calling. “Jimin! Park Jimin!”

“Jesus!” called someone from the back of the shop. From the doorway there emerged a young, wide-eyed, flushed guy with a messy apron and knitted brows. He scanned the floor and saw the pups wandering about, immediately wincing. “Jung Hoseok! I told you to stop bringing the dogs!”

Hoseok laughed and shortened the retriever’s leash, wrapping it around his wrist once more. “They’re behaving!”

“Behaving — my ass,” said the young boy, grumbling as he rubbed his forehead. “If any one of them puts their cute little snouts into any of my vases and knocks it over, you’re paying double.”

Hoseok smirked. “Don’t act like you aren’t happy to see them,” he teased.

Jimin opened his eyes with a sigh, brows still furrowed. “I’d be happier if I saw them outside.”

“Heh,” breathed Hoseok, petting the collie on her head. “Anyway, Jimin this is my friend Namjoon.”

Jimin’s eyes slid over to meet mine and he blinked a few times. “That’s a tall friend,” he remarked. He wiped his right hand on his apron a few times and took a half step toward me to shake hands. I took it with a smile. “Nice to meet you,” he said gently.

I nodded. “Likewise.”

“Now you,” said Jimin, pointing a small, accusing finger at Hoseok. “Didn’t I tell you to warn me when you decide to come over?”

Hoseok rolled his eyes. “Do we have to do that among friends?”

“Shut up,” said Jimin, crossing his arms. “I was in the middle of glazing and now my employee’s gotta do it on her own.”

“You got an employee?” asked Hoseok, clearly surprised.

Jimin paused for a moment before smirking. “Mhm,” he said, smug. “And she’s pretty good too. Really interested in pottery.”

Hoseok scoffed. “Don’t tell me…,” he began.

Jimin raised his brows. “Hm?”

“You didn’t hire her because she’s cute, did you?”

Jimin laughed and patted his leg. “Ah, well…it’s not like she’s not cute,” he began, then sighed and shook his head. “Nah. I just…wanted to give her something to do, I guess.”

The words hit me strangely. Was this employee wandering too? Curiosity began to grow in my stomach. “Anyway,” continued Jimin. “How do you two know each other? I’ve been stuck with you since diapers and I’ve never met your tall friend,” he said, eyeing me sidelong with a smirk.

I cleared my throat. “Uh, I had extended family out here, so I visited often as a kid. He lived near my grandma’s house, so we played as kids.”

“He moved here in elementary school. We were in the same year, so we hung out more,” said Hoseok, waving his hands. “Anyway, if you’d gone to our school instead you would’ve known before.”

Jimin laughed. “I also wouldn’t have been bullied,” he joked. I stiffened. Was that something he could be so nonchalant about? “Gotta laugh so you don’t cry, right?” he asked me once he noticed my reaction. He chuckled. “Ah, but what did you want anyway, Hoseok? I can’t really leave my employee by herself too long.”

“Cheeky,” said Hoseok and Jimin only rolled his eyes. “I figured you could show Namjoon how you make pottery.”

“You want a demo?” asked Jimin, dry.

Hoseok nodded. “Mhm.”

“Right now?”

“Yeah.”

“With no warning?”

Hoseok pursed his lips. “I figured a great potter like you could do it on the spot…”

“Ugh,” mumbled Jimin, running a messy hand through his hair. He glanced between me and Hoseok a few times, jaw locked, before sighing. “Alright, let me tell Eunbyul first.”

“Eunbyul?” I asked, and the name fell off my tongue in a way that felt…familiar.

He nodded. “My employee. She can handle it on her own, but I don’t know if she knows that,” he said with a laugh. “Just give me a second.”

Jimin turned on his heel and jogged back through the doorway in the back and, unable to deny my curiosity, I followed behind and peeked my head in. Although the place was big and fairly organized, there were large pieces of machinery blocking my view of Jimin. But nonetheless I could see the back of a girl’s head, slightly shorter than him, waving dark hair restrained with an old newspaper rubber band. She nodded once and glanced down at the tray of freshly glazed cups in her hands. I couldn’t hear her, but Jimin smiled and gave her shoulder a squeeze. She seemed to sigh before turning and walking quickly to the kiln. With her back still facing me, she set the tray down and grabbed cups in both hands, placing them in the kiln. It took her all of thirty seconds to get all two dozen in, and as she turned and strode toward the vat beside the massive kiln, I watched a few stray strands of hair loose themselves from her rubber band.

I glanced down at my wrist, at the hair elastic I’d nearly forgotten about, and briefly considered offering it to her. But she seemed busy as she dipped chalky cups into the glaze, pulling them out shiny. She set them aside one by one, and there was something oddly confident and precise about her motions. Even the way she used the front of her wrist to push the locks of waving hair behind her ear seemed exact, focused.

Strangely, I found myself envying her.

And, as I watched her back, I felt the unmistakable sensation of an under-the-skin kind of itch, the kind you can’t scratch, even if you try your hardest.

Jimin approached and grinned at me. “Checking out my employee?” he teased.

I flushed and turned away quickly. “I didn’t even see her face,” I said, pouting a little.

He laughed and clapped my shoulder. “Let’s do this demo.”

And it hit me as Jimin began setting up the potter’s wheel and clay. Wordlessly, I sat down on the stool beside Hoseok and the dogs and fished around in my pocket for my phone. I yanked it out and pulled up my photos, scanning them. Sure enough, that photo I snapped at Hyejin’s the other day. The girl with the baseball cap. I saw her, sandy skin barely visible beneath the brim of her hat, Somi’s shoulder in the foreground, the girl drowning in clothes several sizes too big.

“That girl…,” I said, thinking aloud as I stared down at the photo.

Jimin turned his eyes to me and smiled. “Hm?”

“I…I’ve been seeing her everywhere lately,” I said, chuckling.

Hoseok sighed and leaned over his lap to get a better look at the shapeless clay Jimin was beginning to mold. “Make it into Justin Trudeau.”

Jimin paused a moment and squared his gaze on Hoseok. “The Canadian prime minister?”

Hoseok nodded. “Yeah. Do it.”

Jimin sighed and shook his head, not even bothering to respond, as I took turns looking at the photo on my phone and at Jimin’s deft hands working the clay carefully. It was impossible to explain, but the way he moved was inexplicably similar to that girl. Perhaps because she was his employee…

But that didn’t seem right.

It was more that they were both endowed with the same nameless quality.

A precision that only comes from—

“Passion,” said Hoseok in a whisper, leaning over to me.

I flushed, my attention now entirely on Jimin as he molded the clay into the vague shape of a flowerpot. “Huh?”

“That’s what makes Jimin so…,” he began, then chuckled. “It’s what makes him so Jimin.”

I was quiet for a moment. “I see,” I said. I might have been nervous that Jimin would overhear us talking about him if it weren’t for the unwavering focus captured in his eye. He probably wouldn’t have even heard an earthquake. “It’s mesmerizing.”

Hoseok chuckled. “Mhm,” he said. “Reminds me of when we were in high school.”

I raised a brow with a smirk. “How so?”

He hummed. “I remember during study hall, you’d always have your laptop out,” he said, laughing. “Mr. Kang hated it.”

I smiled softly. “Yeah. Told him it was for class president duties.”

“But all you did was make beats.”

I was quiet for a moment. Again, I understood what he meant. It was hard not to with a guy like Hoseok. As kind as he was, he was equally clever. He knew how to say something without saying it. I turned to him and we locked eyes. Instead of speaking, I just nodded my head and offered a smile. He returned it, patting my knee.

“Thanks,” I said as Jimin finished up with the main body of the pot. It was gorgeous, an elegant, long shape that tapered toward the bottom. Looked like the kind of pot you’d put a bonsai in.

“For what?” asked Hoseok, feigning ignorance with wide eyes.

I chuckled, squeezing his shoulder. “Just thanks.”

Cubase. God it had been a while since I’d used it on my home computer.

I sat on the floor in front of the coffee table, staring at the project as evening slowly became night. Yoongi still wasn’t back from work, likely putting in long hours finishing up that big collaboration he’d been working on for months. He wouldn’t tell me who it was with, but his excitement told me enough to know it was big.

I rested my cheek in my hand and sighed, tapping my fingertips against the coffee table. The song was nice, kind of slow. It felt a bit…melancholy but still hopeful. I shut my eyes and thought a moment. Could use vocals.

Quietly, I flipped through my lyric book and paused on a single word. Everythingoes. Written sloppily in the margins of a song I’d never finished. I cocked a brow. Back when I was younger, going to therapy, the doctor had told me something to that effect. Everything goes. Every moment, every pain, every trauma. I sat up straighter. Something about it rolled nicely, both in English and Korean. The lyrics beside it were meant to go with it. Perhaps if I recorded myself with Yoongi’s mic…

I changed a few things around, added some lines where I felt the words weren’t enough, and stewed over it for a long moment.

Everything has to hurt.

That line stood out to me. Silently, I padded into Yoongi’s room and grabbed the mic he kept hidden in the second drawer of his work table. I’d take the scolding later. I fell in a heap once more before my laptop and plugged in the mic. After a few tests, I cleared my throat and began recording the rap. If nothing else, I could find someone else to sing the chorus.

“Like morning comes after night, if summer comes after spring,” I began, and didn’t stop, didn’t stumble. “And every day I stay, because people and pain all die eventually.” I kept going, and even though I was rusty, I could feel some power in it. In the words. “Pray that this wind will pass like all winds do.”

I stopped to catch my breath, pausing the song and pulling the headphones off my ears with a sigh. I patted my cheeks a little, shook my head, and opened my eyes slowly.

But when I looked around, I saw something that hadn’t been there before. More specifically, a darkly clad someone standing with crossed arms beside the arm of the couch. I screamed before I could stop myself as Yoongi crossed the living room floor and sat on the couch beside my head, hunching over his knees to inspect my project with squinted eyes.

“Sounded good,” he said with a nod. I swallowed hard. Without looking at me, he continued. “Can I hear the beat?”

“Ah, uh, it’s still really rough and-,”

He turned to face me with one cocked brow. “Can I hear it?”

I hinged and unhinged my jaw a few times, but he was scanning me and I couldn’t stall long. I clamped my mouth shut and cleared my throat. “Um…yeah, sure.”

I unplugged the headphones and played what I had from the start. “I…I wanna add vocals here,” I said as the song began. “Something kind of…like a chant. Repeating, I think. Like a mantra.”

“Mm,” said Yoongi with a nod, brow low as he listened. I’d have liked if he didn’t listen quite so intently.

“Um…and then here I think I want the piano to get a little quieter.”

“Mhm.”

I nodded and decided to stay silent. He wasn’t giving me any feedback anyway, just listening. Instead, I just sat there like a kid, awaiting my parent to tell me if I did well or not. The song closed and I glanced over my shoulder at Yoongi who by then had his chin seized between his two palms, almost like he was praying.

“So…?” I hedged, eyeing him.

He nodded. “Really good.”

My eyes went wide and I stared at him like I was seeing him for the first time in the dark living room. I could just barely see his lips tilting in a bare smile. “R-Really?”

“I wouldn’t lie,” he said, leaning back with a nod. “Why haven’t you shared your work with me before?”

I stiffened. “Um…well, when we met you were already almost graduated with your degree, and I was just this young kid following you around. I…kinda figured someone like you wouldn’t want to listen to my shit.”

He cocked a brow. “It’s not shit though.”

“I just…I mean, you were a pro from the start, you know? Just…super confident from the beginning. And by the time I started to get really serious about it, you were already working for the label and I was getting recruited by a contract company,” I said, shaking my head. “I figured that alone was enough to show the difference in our leagues.”

“League?” asked Yoongi, brow furrowed.

I sighed. “I dunno. You’re…you’ve always been great. And I’m just…a sound engineer, really.”

Yoongi shook his head. “I’m telling you this because I mean it, alright?” he asked, crossing his arms. “If you got in with the right label, you’d do well.”

I sat up straighter, twisting to look at him properly. But instead, he was staring at my project, still smiling just barely. “Huh?”

“I’m not just saying that,” he said, nodding. “You could be a really successful producer.”

I was about to respond, perhaps pick his brain, perhaps thank him, but my phone began buzzing on the table and I jumped at the sound. Quickly I grabbed it, ready to silence the phone and return the call later. But I saw the name on the screen and paused. Hani. And at this hour…

Yoongi patted my shoulder. “Take the call,” he said, chuckling. “I know you don’t have a choice.”

I turned to stop him, but he was already striding towards his room. He didn’t even mention me borrowing his mic…

Sighing, I slid the phone open and took the call. “Hey…,” I said, and even I could hear that my voice was glum.

“Hey, uh…,” she said, her tone fragile.

I rubbed my temples. “What’s up?”

“It’s…it’s just Sooyoung. The divorce is almost final and they’re talking about custody and she’s kinda caught in, like, the crossfire or whatever. I’m worried,” she said, speaking too fast for me to keep up with.

“Have you talked to her?”

She sighed. “No, she’s not taking my calls. My parents texted me to look out for her, but she hasn’t even seen my texts,” she said. “I’m worried.”

“I understand,” I said gently. “Maybe go home for a few days and spend time with her, you know? Maybe she needs you there.”

“I know I’m just…I guess I’m kinda scared, you know? Like to go to my childhood home and see everything changing…it’s weird,” she said. “God, can I just come over tonight? Like movies or something?”

I stiffened. “Ah…jeez, Hani. I’m…I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”

“I know, I know. Joon, I’m so sorry. It’s just…I really don’t wanna be alone right now,” she said, voice breaking.

I felt my chest pinch a little. “Hani, why don’t you go home then?”

She sighed. “I told you-,”

“But if you can’t be alone, the best place is home,” I said, staring at my half-finished song. The one that would surely stay half-finished if she came over.

“I think it would be too hard.”

“Then what about your friends? Joohee lives close by anyway,” I said, desperate.

“Joon…,” she began, letting the word die in the air.

I sighed. “It’s not good for me, Hani. I wish you’d respect that.”

“I know. It’s selfish, and I know that. But…I just need to be with you right now, you know?”

“Don’t say that,” I said, pinching my eyes shut. But, to my surprise, my heart didn’t race like it used to. Instead, only annoyance.

“I mean it-,”

“Hani!” I shouted, slamming a hand on the table. I saw there on my wrist that hair elastic. What was it about that thing? “I’ve told you so many times, haven’t I? I’ve told you it’s not healthy!”

“Don’t yell!”

I shook my head, heart pounding now for an entirely different reason. “I’m not yelling,” I said, leveling my tone. “I…Hani, do you have any idea what it’s been like?”

She was quiet. “I…”

“Do you have any idea how hard it was? When you told me on graduation night. The years after. How you knew I knew you were still messing around on me,” I pinched my nose bridge. “I promised myself I wouldn’t make you feel guilty for it. That you yourself felt bad enough. That that would be enough for me too.”

“Joon…”

“But you can’t keep hurting people and expect them to give you the love you need,” I said. “You can’t keep putting me through the pain of reliving everything. It’s not fair.”

She said nothing. For a long time. But I heard the ambient sound of life on the other side of the phone, and I knew she was still there. Still listening, waiting for me to continue. But I didn’t have it in me. I’d said it. I’d finally howled.

“I…I don’t know what to say, Joon,” she said finally.

I nodded. “Me either.”

“I…can’t we meet up and talk this out in person?”

I exhaled, long and slow, and shook my head, eyes falling to the hair elastic on mu wrist. “No, Hani.”

She sighed. “Namjoon…”

“Go home, okay? Do it for Sooyoung,” I said before ending the call and tossing my phone onto the couch behind me.

Quietly, determined, I pulled my headphones back up around my ears, straightened my sweatshirt, and got back to work on the song.

“Namjoon!” someone called as I opened my eyes.

I didn’t even have a chance to react, because the girl who’d called for me had already wrapped her arms around my waist, burying her head in my shirt. It was familiar, this scene. Looking down at the top of a strange girl’s head in the middle of the darkness. Feeling her arms tighten around me. I might have resisted, might have pulled away, if I didn’t feel that same itch beneath my skin as I had watching that employee earlier today.

“Eun…Eunbyul?” I said, testing the name in my mouth.

She stiffened and pulled away, and once our eyes met the memories returned. Everything. Unwillingly, tears welled in my eyes and everything made sense. That wistfulness I’d been feeling all day, the sense of profound melancholia. After leaving the dream the night before, being so close, seeing something so painful, and having not even a spare second to console her…

Instead of saying anything, I swept her up in my arms again and let my head fall into the crook of her neck. She held tight too, like I might slip away if she didn’t keep her grip strong. She smelled like strawberry shampoo and the faint, barely-there scent of clay.

She breathed a shaky exhale and nodded against me. “I’m so fucking happy to see you,” she said softly.

I nodded, unable to summon words for a moment. “I…I saw you again today. At the pottery place.”

She nodded. “I saw you too. Walking away with Jimin.”

“I wish I would have gotten a good look at you,” I said.

“Me too…”

“I’m sorry.”

“Me too.”

We stayed that way, embracing, for a moment that felt endless. Eunbyul was the first to break away, adjusting her glasses as she did. She sniffled a little, rubbing beneath her nose, and averted her eyes. Neither of us said anything, but it was clear something had shifted between us. Our relationship…whatever it was…was changing.

“Let’s…let’s do something fun tonight,” I said with a nod.

She smiled softly, pushing her hair from her face. She nodded. “I’d like that.”

Gently, I took her hand and shut my eyes. I tried to remember every detail of the place, every lamppost and vendor’s booth. I tried to conjure the cobbled walkways, the ferris wheel, the lanterns strung up in rows overhead. And when I opened my eyes, it was sunset and we were there.

“An amusement park?” she asked, chuckling. “And…wait, is this in Sangdo-dong?” she asked.

I nodded. “You know it?”

She stared, mystified and wide-eyed, at the park splayed out before her. “Um…yeah, actually. I think I mentioned it before, but…something kind of scary happened to me when I was young. It was pretty nearby here.”

I stiffened. “Shit, I can take us somewhere else-,”

She turned to me and smiled, shaking her head. “Don’t,” she said. “I wanna go on some rides.”

I blinked down at her, at the big sleep shirt with shorts just barely peeking out, at the bed hair, at the flush in her cheeks. And I felt myself flush too. I cleared my throat and began strolling toward one of the coasters.

“Do, uh…do you think the rides will work?” I asked.

She hummed. “I dunno. You’ve never tried?”

I shook my head. “I…also had something scary happen when I was a kid. Here at the amusement park. So I haven’t been back.”

“Oh,” she said, pausing in the walkway. “We can go someplace else.”

I smiled and rubbed circles into her hand. “No, it’s fine. It’s just…the only amusement park I could remember. And I remember it pretty vividly.”

She nodded. “Alright.”

“Here, let’s go on this one,” I said, pointing to the swinging pirate ship.

Her eyes glittered in the sunset as she stared at it. “Whoa,” she said, glancing around. “Who’s gonna operate it?”

I paused a moment and pursed my lips. “You sit down first and I’ll push a button or something.”

“Push a button?” she repeated, laughing.

I rolled my eyes and gave her shoulder a shove with mine. “Maybe two buttons,” I said, shrugging. I released her hand she gestured for her to go ahead onto the ride.

She waved at me over her shoulder and took a seat at the farthest row, the one right by the back of the ship. She bounced a little as she waited for me, smiling in my direction as I examined the control panel. Perhaps because I’d never seen it, I couldn’t quite imagine what it would look like and in its place was just a blank metal podium.

I sighed and rubbed my chin. “I mean…,” I began, talking to myself, “if it’s a dream, I can make the rules, right?”

I shut my eyes and imagined a big red button on the podium, one that would give the start a delay so I could take my seat with Eunbyul. As I opened my eyes, there it was and with a smile I pounded it. Told you, I thought, just one button. I heard the machine whirring up and sprinted as fast as I could toward the entrance of the ship. I bumped my shin on the way down the aisle and Eunbyul suppressed a laugh with her hand. Luckily, just as the thing lurched to life, I fell into the spot beside her with a heavy sigh.

“You ready?” I asked, smiling.

She laughed and nodded. “Been ready.”

I rolled my eyes as the ride began to swing like a pendulum, gradually increasing in speed and height. Soon, we were rocking back and forth, sent high into the air and then hovering, weightless, for a fraction of a second before plummeting back down to earth. Beside me, Eunbyul released a joyful scream, throwing her arms in the air as we swung up and down, back and forth. The wind whipped her hair around, and on each descent she had to squeeze her eyes nearly shut. She laughed as we swung and swung. If she’d let me, I’d liked to have kept sitting there forever, watching her smile and laugh as the pirate ship lurched.

But my brain seemed to know approximately how long a ride should be, and before too long, the ride slowed to a steady stop. Eunbyul, with her hair now windswept and waving and her eyes alight, turned to me with the brightest smile.

“That was so fun,” she said, laughing.

It was the first time I’d seen her with such unbridled happiness, an easy joy in her features. And she was beautiful. I wanted her to stay that way, stay smiling, stay messy, stay joyful.

I smiled. “What next?” I asked.

The two of us traveled through what I remembered of the park. It had been a long time since I’d seen the place, but it seemed the memory was nearly imprinted. After all, it was the last place I’d seen with Dad. I ambled easily by Eunbyul’s side as she explored my memories, and we stopped at nearly every ride. The log ride, the coaster that nearly blew out my eardrums, the haunted house sans actors to play the ghosts.

“Let’s go on that,” she said, pointing at the ferris wheel as it sat juxtaposed against the forever sunset.

I raised my brows. “Oh, sure.”

She turned to me and smiled. “Hey, Namjoon?” she asked, almost shy.

“Hm?”

“Thank you for…you know, taking me here,” she said, laughing lightly. “Lately, I’ve been feeling a little better and I think it’s because I’ve been able to spend time with you.”

“Eunbyul-,”

“Ugh, let’s go before I get sentimental,” she said, waving her hands with a pinched expression. I laughed as she led the way to the ferris wheel.

Once I’d pressed the identical red button and scrambled to join Eunbyul in the closed ferris wheel box, the two of us fell into a comfortable, easy silence. She gazed out the window as the blurry horizon that my mind couldn’t conjure, the place where all the colors blended together. And I watched her, silhouetted against the violent yellow sun as it descended into reds and oranges.

“So…,” I began, watching her keenly. “How do you know that pottery guy?”

She paused for a moment before pursing her lips and offering a shrug. “I met him recently. I was spying on him through the window.”

“Spying?”

She nodded. “Because it looks so nice when he throws pottery.”

I smiled softly. “It was really mesmerizing.”

She turned to me with a smile. “He’s a nice guy,” she said. “I think he believes in me too much.”

I shook my head. “I saw you working today, Eunbyul. You were…really competent. It was like watching Jimin make pottery. I couldn’t look away.”

Her skin went a little red in the cheeks and she cleared her throat, smoothing her palms over her kneecaps. “Well…”

“You’re better than you think you are.”

She sighed, letting her gaze fall. “Anyway, how do you know him?” she asked, letting my eyes again.

I smiled. “My friend Hoseok took me by today. He was trying to…embolden me, I guess. Get me back into my groove.”

“Your groove has been off?” she asked, brows raised.

I nodded. “For a while. I’m…stifled. In a lot of ways.”

She nodded. “And did it help? Seeing Jimin?”

I smiled softly, remembering that song. “Yeah. I…I made a song. For myself. Something I believe in.”

She smiled at me and reached out across the small space between our legs to pat my knee. “Namjoon! That’s amazing,” she said, chuckling. “That Jimin. He’s good, I’ll give him that.” She paused and glanced at me. “Let me hear the song sometime, okay? When we finally meet in real life.”

I swallowed hard and rubbed my neck. Nervous as I was for her to hear it, the offer was irresistible. I nodded. “And…just Joon is fine.”

She stared at me, blinking, before she chuckles breathily and nodded. “Ah! O-Okay. Then, uh…call me Byul, okay?”

“Byul…”

She went red and cleared her throat, laughing again. “God, it’s embarrassing to hear you say it,” she said.

I smiled. “Do a lot of people call you that?”

“No,” she said softly, watching her hands as the ferris wheel rolled lazily toward the top.

“Does that bookstore guy call you Byul?” I asked, unable to stop myself.

She stiffened. “Who?” she asked, then snapped her fingers. “Ah, Jin?”

I shrugged, pouting. “I dunno. The guy who was flirting with you at the bookstore.”

She laughed. “He wasn’t flirting, just…bored,” she said with a nod. “God, I guess…I guess I have a crush on him?” she said, but the way she furrowed her brow made it seem like she was unsure. “But these days, it feels a little different. Like…maybe I don’t.”

I smiled, just a little relieved, and nodded. “I feel the same way with my ex.” Eunbyul’s eyes snapped up to meet mine, wide and brown. “Um…she called tonight. Hani.”

She inhaled as if to speak, but only let it go and nodded. “Oh.”

“I told her she can’t come over anymore.”

I watched her expression change, like she was relieved too, and she exhaled slow. “Good job,” she said, meeting my eyes again with a smile. “That must have been hard.”

I shook my head. “It’s like you said. Like…the way I feel about her is different now. Even in real life.”

“Wonder why,” she said idly as she glanced out the window at the empty park below.

I felt my heart thundering in my chest and swallowed hard. Say it, Namjoon, I thought. Say it now or regret not saying it forever. “I can…think of a few reasons,” I said slowly, watching her for any sign to stop.

She stiffened a little and turned to me with wide eyes. “Huh?” she asked. Surprised, but not disgusted.

Slowly, I leaned across the small space between us so that our faces were close. “Byul, I…,” I began, chuckling as the nerves made my words catch in my throat. “Sorry, nervous,” I said, unable to stop myself from telling her the truth.

She nodded and gently took my hand. “It’s okay,” she said.

I took a steadying breath and met her warm, dark eyes. “I think I have feelings for you.”

She was still for a moment, still holding my hand, before slowly she let her eyes drop and her fingers slipped between mine. It was small, but the gesture felt intimate. And the space between us was charged, trapped in this small ferris wheel box. I knew it was stupid, that there was no way it could work. I knew it would be nearly impossible to meet her in real life if I couldn’t remember these dreams, and I knew that even meeting, even seeing her properly, might not be enough to make me remember. I knew it all. I knew it was stupid, and that this moment was finite and that in the morning I’d forget it ever happened.

But right then, I needed to kiss her.

And so I tipped my chin just enough for our lips to touch. It wasn’t the sort of kiss you see in movies. Passionate and frantic and desperate, hands clawing at each other, panting. No, it was…softer. Gentler. She jumped a little at the contact, but I watched with half-open eyes as she shut her own eyes and leaned into me, her fingers still laced in mine. Tenderly, I lifted a hand to rest along the line of her jaw, touching her just barely. I felt her tilt her head to the side and took the initiative to deepen the kiss, just enough. Smooth and slow, like butter melting in a pot. Smooth and slow.

I pulled away first, hand still holding her jaw, her hair fluttering against my knuckles, and stared at her with heavy-lidded eyes. “Sorry,” I said in a whisper. Everything felt hot, so hot I thought I might pass out if it weren’t a dream.

She shook her head and tightened her grip on my hand. “Don’t apologize.”

“I know it’s really impossible, but…,” I began, but stopped as I felt the pull once more in my chest. “Fuck,” I breathed, resting my forehead against hers.

“I know,” she said with a nod, shutting her eyes with a shaky exhale. “We…we’ll meet. We have to meet, okay?” she said.

I nodded against her forehead and shut my own eyes. Even though I knew it might be a lie, nonetheless I responded sincerely. “We will.”

“It’ll be okay.”

“You’re right.”

She nodded and sighed. “I’ll see you tomorrow night, Joon.”

“See you tomorrow, Byul.”

And in an instant, she slipped away.

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shawnstoriesx · 5 years

Text

Bear Pt 1

hello! this is my first time writing so I hope you enjoy it ! any feedback would be appreciated!

I also rlly like angst so this is a lil angsty lol

YN parked her car and started on the short walk to her shared apartment. It was late in the evening on Friday, YN choosing to stay behind at the university library to finish up her notes and start on an essay instead of going straight home. It was only Week 2 of the her 2nd year and she was already being bombarded with assignments. All she wanted to do was recuperate over the weekend, take a much deserved nap nap, spend the Friday night in watching Netflix.

However, as soon as she pushed the door to her apartment in, YN was met with loud music and the sight of her roommate and 3 other girls she didn’t recognize running around the room, putting on makeup and pregaming. They were dressed for a night out in shorts and tank tops and were already in the mood, dancing along to the music Upon hearing the door open, Alexa turned around and gave YN a warm grin before pulling her towards the small group of girls, urging her to dance with them.

“Go out with us YN! You deserve a night out!” Alexa yelled as she pretended to grind up on YN.

YN chuckled before giving her friend a playful shove. “Nah I’m drained I’d rather spend the night in. You guys have fun though” YN responded.

After a couple more minutes of Alexa unsuccessfully trying to convince YN to come, Alexa and the other girls left while YN was sitting on the couch, trying to decide what movie to watch.

YN and Alexa had just met this year after YN responded to Alexa’s post about needing a roommate to split the apartment rent with. They had different personalities and interests but were still able to get along fine, instantly clicking with each other when they first met up to decide whether or not they were a good match. YN was definitely more reserved and introverted while Alexa was very outgoing and loved surrounding herself with people. Everywhere Alexa went, she always had a group of people following her. They seemingly worshipped Alexa and why shouldn’t they? YN’s roommate was kind, funny, inviting, and not to mention drop dead gorgeous. Alexa was a natural beauty. She really was the total package and YN was grateful that she was able to find such a great roommate.

After finally finding a movie and reheating last nights dinner, YN made herself comfortable on the couch. Just as the movie was starting, she heard a ding from her phone. It was a text from Shawn, her childhood best friend.

“Going to the club tonight w some friends. Wanna come? I’ll pick u up”

They’d been inseparable since middle school but with YN attending university and Shawn taking a gap year to travel before going to community college, they had seen less of each other. This didn’t affect the friendship at all though. They still talked regularly and were still the bestest of friends. YN just missed seeing his face but now that he was finally starting community college nearby, the two planned on seeing each other much more often.

Just as YN was about to respond no, Shawn sent another message.

“Hoping to find a girl tonight ;-) need my wingwoman”

YN’s heart dropped just a little bit. YN had always had a teeny tiny crush on Shawn. And why wouldn’t she? Shawn was handsome and kind and treated her like no other guy ever had. The crush she had was never serious though and she knew that she and Shawn were too good of friends to ever see each other in that way. Regardless, YN couldn’t help but get jealous whenever he talked about one of his previous girlfriends and every once in while imagined herself to be the person receiving all of Shawn’s affection. That couldn’t hurt right?

“no lol I don’t think me being there is gonna help you get a girl. I can’t work miracles” she responded. She could already imagine the laugh that Shawn probably let out after reading that text, deep and warm.

Shawn and her quickly caught up through text until he suddenly stopped responding mid conversation. That was odd. Even when he was busy or at a party, Shawn would always respond to her texts as soon as possible. Or at least with just a “ttyl”

“His phone probably died” YN thought and she resumed her movie.

As she was getting ready to go to bed early, another notification popped up on her phone. Thinking it was Shawn, YN rushed to her bedside where her phone was charging.

“Oh” YN couldnt help but let out a disappointed sigh. It was just a text from her roommate.

“Bringing home a guy I met at the club. Text me if u have a problem w that”

“Great...” YN thought. She was a little uncomfortable with it but it wasn’t that big of a problem, at least Alexa asked her beforehand.

“Yea no problemo. keep it down tho ;-)” she quickly typed before falling into her bed and was fast asleep within 10 min.

The next morning, YN woke up refreshed and alert. Wanting to make use of this energy, YN quickly brushed her teeth and changed into her workout clothes, a gym tank and some running shorts. YN hadn’t worked out much before (okay she didn’t work out at all outside of PE) but freshmen 15 really did a number on her and since then, YN has made an effort to exercise more often. She speed walked out of her room and to the kitchen to grab a banana and her keys, barely noticing the person standing in the kitchen until she heard her name.

“Y/N?” a familiar voice called out.

She looked up to see the confused face of her best friend, Shawn Mendes. standing in her kitchen. in nothing but boxers. with hickeys all over his neck.

“What the fuck are you doing in my apartment?” YN shouted, confusion and bewilderment obvious in her voice.

“Uh well...” Shawn started sheepishly, a blush creeping up in his cheeks, before he was cut off by Alexa opening the door with a box of bagels in her hand.

Suddenly, everything was making sense to YN. Alexa came home with Shawn last night. Her Shawn. And they had sex with her sleeping peacefully in the next room. To say YN was completely and utterly shocked was an understatement.

It’s been a couple weeks since that morning and Shawn was a common sight now in the apartment. But he wasn’t there to hang out with YN. He was there for Alexa. They started seeing each other after that night and although it wasn’t official, it seemed that Shawn only had time for her, not for his best his best friend of 8 years. First it was cancelled hangouts. Then he just stopped responding to her texts. And now, they were lucky to even exchange anything beyond a quick greeting whenever YN came home after a late night studying to see Shawn and Alexa curled on the couch together.

“You wanna grab some boba really quick YN?” Shawn asked. Shawn and Alexa were headed to the movies later tonight but Alexa got caught up at work and was going to be an hour late and he was already at the apartment.

“Nah I’m busy” YN said begrudgingly. And she really was. She had to catch up on her readings but she also really didn’t feel like talking to Shawn right now after he had so easily forgotten about her after meeting Alexa.

“You’re always too busy now, we never hang anymore” Shawn whined, walking behind her and wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug.

O so now he has time for YN now that Alexa isn’t here.

“I’m not the one who’s been cancelling our hangouts to spend time with his girlfriend” YN retorted, her voice tight as she tried to focus on the textbook in front of her. She felt Shawn shift his body and could tell that he was trying to get a read on her face.

“Hey...that was mean. And that’s not true, you cancel because you’re busy with your classes too you know” Shawn replied. A frown was obvious on his face as he tried to figure out why YN’s mood changed so quickly.

Believing it to be a result of stress from her workload, Shawn grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of her chair, enveloping her in a big hug. YN tried to fight her way out but it was no use. He was too strong, his broad arms wrapping around her frame completely. The smell of his cologne relaxed her and she gave in, resting her head in the crook of his neck and wrapping her arms around his waist.

“I miss you, YN. Please come with me” he whispered sincerely, lips ghosting over her ear. I mean, when he asked like that, how could she ever say no. A slight blush bloomed on her cheeks as she slowly nodded her head, eyes not meeting his.

YN quickly found a table in the crowded boba shop while Shawn ordered and paid for their drinks at the counter. Within a few minutes, Shawn was seated across from her. Taking a sip from their drinks, an awkward silence loomed over them.

Eager to break free of the silence, YN spoke first, hoping that her tone masked how sad she was that YN and Shawn were no longer talking as easily as they had before. “So how are you and Alexa?”

At the sound of Alexa’s name, Shawn instantly piped up, a smile growing across his face. “She’s absolutely amazing YN. I don’t know why you didn’t tell me about her before.”

He went on and on about how great Alexa was and YN couldn’t help but feel sad. But she was happy for him and Alexa nonetheless. At least they were happy together, even though she was still alone.

“And I still can’t believe she’s just as into Harry Potter as we are. You and Alexa are like the same person.”

A confused look took over YN’s face. “Wait what?” YN cut in.

“O I was just talking about how similar you two are. You share all the same interests: Harry Potter, Hozier, hiking.”

That was definitely odd. When she and Alexa first met up, YN distinctly remembers that they didn’t share many interests at all. “Maybe Alexa picked up those interests along the way while trying to get to know YN. Alexa was sweet like that” YN thought.

“Are you okay YN” Shawn said. The concern in his voice bringing YN back to the present

“O yea sorry lost in thought.” YN chuckled.

“O okay then..”Shawn started. “I wanted to ask you a question.” His voice took on a serious tone. “How do you feel about me asking Alexa to be my girlfriend?”

YN choked on the pearls she was drinking. She and Shawn both shared a nervous chuckle.

“I’m asking because we’re best friends and it must be kinda weird for me to date your roommate and...”

“I’m fine. Why would it bother me. Happy for you two” YN quickly retorted, giving a shallow smile.

Shawn gave one of his goofy grins where his entire face seemed to be smiling. His eyes crinkled and his face just lit up and it made YN’s heart race.

She missed that smile but this time, Shawn wasn’t smiling because of her. He was probably thinking about Alexa. And that crushed YN. She didn’t know why. She had never been this jealous with Shawn’s girlfriends before. Maybe it’s because this time, YN personally knew the girl. Maybe it’s because this time, YN knew that it only took Shawn one night at the club to fall for Alexa while it’s been nearly 8 years with YN and he’s only ever seen her as a friend.

YN could feel the tears pooling at her eyes and she quickly tried to hide them by bringing the sleeve of her hoodie up. But Shawn was already staring deep into her eyes and noticed the tears right away.

“YN are you okay? Honey...”

Honey. That was his childhood nickname for her ever since they made far fetched plans in 3rd grade to live in the forest together. YN would be a gardener and collect honey for Shawn, her pet bear. She was his Honey and he was her Bear and they used to refer to each other with these nicknames whenever possible, mostly as a joke because of how domestic it made them feel. But upon hearing this nickname again, YN suddenly realized how it’s been a long time since she last heard him call her that. Ever since he met Alexa.

Her body turned cold and her face became stiff at the thought. She stopped tearing up but her eyes were still glossy. “Yea I’m fine. Just tired.” she sighed.

He stood up and cupped his large hands around her face, holding her face under the deep gaze of his chocolate brown eyes. “Cut the crap YN. What’s up? You’ve been distant and Alexa and I are worried about you.”

Avoiding his eyes, her gaze fell on the door of the shop just as Alexa came in, looking fresh and bright in a short dress. A stark contrast to YN’s hoodie and jeans combo with dried tears. Of course Shawn would fall for Alexa and not her. Alexa was perfect. Perfect personality. Perfect looks.

Alexa quickly spotted the two, with Shawn’s hands cupped around YN’s face. YN didn’t know if she was imagining it but she could’ve sworn that she saw Alexa’s eyebrows raise and a look of contempt or hate cross her face before it was quickly replaced by a perfect smile.

“I’m fine Shawn. Alexa’s here and I really should go.” YN responded dryly. She pushed away Shawn’s warm hands, cheeks instantly feeling cold from the loss of contact, and collected her things.

“Whatcha doing?” Alexa chirped after landing a quick kiss to Shawn.

“I was just about to leave. You two have fun.” YN said quickly, already walking away before she had completed the sentence.

YN could hear Shawn calling out to her and imagined that he was running up to her, about to pull her into one of his big bear hugs that never failed to lift her spirits. But that daydream was quickly cut short by Alexa’s whining that they were going to miss the movie. YN continued to walk back to her apartment, still hoping that Shawn would run up to her any minute to check on her and make sure she was alright. By the time she reached the door to her apartment, YN turned around. Just to check if Shawn was a little behind from her brisk pace. But the walkway was just empty.

YN was just alone.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes au #college!au #college!shawn #shawn mendes x yn #shawn mendes angst #angst #shawn mendes x reader #bestfriend!au #bestfriend!shawn

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sweetcatmintea · 5 years

Text

Lemon and Ginger and All That

@hannahs-creations very kindly provided a random four word prompt to make into a drabble. Thanks for the prompt! Sorry it took a hot minute to write <u<;;

I hope you enjoy this little scene ^u^ Feedback is appreciated!

Prompt: vitality, manage, fluster and gleefully

Words: 1768

Characters: Marcos, Whitney, Freddy (Briefly), and Mella

Chaotic didn’t cover the state of the 6pm Café. Freddy’s promotion idea went over so well last fortnight, people were practically lining up to see what they’d do to the menu this time. The apple and elder-flower brew did not disappoint. Perfectly refreshing in the warming days of early spring, with a gentle aroma that transported you to the countryside, apple picking with your gran. Light, crumbly, pastries and tiny finger sandwiches sold almost as quickly as they were prepared. Every time a happy customer left, two more would arrive. That may be a little dramatic. It certainly felt like facing the hydra of the food industry at least. Marcos and Freddy were run off their feet greeting customers, taking orders, brewing tea, selling dry blends, answering questions, transporting food, and trying to squeeze in spot cleans. Uncle Antonio hopped between the register and the kitchen, saving Leroy from the flood of demands.

What terrible timing for Whitney to have to skip out. Although she complained about it, she lived for the busy days like today. She loved to get lost in the hustle, while still managing to find a sense of order and co-ordinating the boys. Marcos had never seen anyone more determined not to take a sick day. When the first thing Whitney did that morning was bolt to the bathroom to re-evaluate dinner, it was clear there was no avoiding it. Regardless of how it went down, the result was the same. Whitney was stuck at home while the boys played the service edition of the floor is lava. (Or would that be the customers?)

Marcos’ mind was a blur of orders and customers, but he didn’t let himself lose track of time. As soon as the hour ticked over, he tagged out. Of course, he checked that Freddy and Uncle Antonio could manage without him first. Not wasting a second more of his lunch break, he slipped into the backroom, tore off his uniform, replacing it with a change of clothes he’d prepared earlier, and was gone.

The walk to their house was made significantly faster by running. Marcos was at the painted off-white door in record time. The plan to catch his breath while he fiddled with his pockets looking for his key met a hitch when he couldn’t locate it. Briefly panicking that he’d left it at the café, Marcos tried to calculate how long it would take to run back to get it, would that take too long? It didn’t fall out while he was running did it?? He’d have to go and find it before someone else did. Should he just risk waking Whitney and asking her to let him in? Ah but she won’t get better if she’s no- wait a minute. There it is. False alarm. Fishing the key out of the depths of its fabric prison, Marcos let himself in as quietly as possible. If he was careful, he should be able to avoid the creaky floorboards.

“I cab ‘ear ‘ou.”

Never mind. He followed Whitney’s raspy croak to the living room, still mindful to tread lightly. She was huddled on the couch, cocooned with blankets and half draped over the arm of the chair. Mella, taking the role of mother hen, sprawled over Whitney’s tracksuit clad legs, incubating her just in case folding herself into cotton origami wasn’t enough. Fever was obvious, painted over Whitney’s sweaty face, interrupted occasionally by loose strands of hair. She hadn’t even bothered to tie it back. Even in illness, she was an over-achiever.

“Were you asleep?” He tired to keep his voice soft despite its gravelly texture. Judging by the way the radio was on, but turned down to its lowest possible volume, she probably had a headache. He wondered briefly if she was resenting her rabbit hearing at the moment.

Whitney shook her head, waving his worries off. “I was ju- uh- aacho!” Another balled up tissue in the over-stuffed bin. “I was jus’ dyin’g apparendly. No, I was listenig do the mid-day stories. Whab are ‘ou doin’g ‘ere?” Mella whined and wiggled closer to Whitney’s flushed face. She was supposed to be resting!

Marcos shrugged. “I got you some tea. Give me a second, I’ll make it for you. It’s called, uh, ‘Vitalitea’ and it’s got lemon and ginger and all that. Should hopefully make you feel better.” It couldn’t make her any worse at least. Red eyes and streaming nose, it was almost painful to see her so far from her bubbly self.

Whitney had always been good at reading people. Just because she was unwell didn’t mean she couldn’t see the crease setting into Marcos’ forehead. He was always so busy worrying about others. The demand he not pity her fell away to the realisation of what he’d said.

“You cabe back jusd ‘o bake tea?”

“No. I’ll get you some lunch too.” He wandered off to the kitchen to get started, entirely missing the touched shock he left her in. According to his calculations, he was still on track even after stalling to get into the house. The majority of making food was just waiting for the tea to brew. It took next to no time to make a sandwich or boil water. While the tea was brewing, he grabbed a brush and a hair tie, returning to the sick bunny.

Seeing her face a tiny bit more flushed made his stomach twist. Was it really okay for her to stay here alone?

“Can you sit up? I’ll put your hair up since I’m here.”

Whitney sighed dramatically but wiggled her way to a sitting(ish) position, much to Mella’s disapproval. “Leab me here to die. I’b not lon’g for thid worlb.”

“Nah, I think we’ll save ya Cottontail. You know Freddy and me’ll be lost without ya at the café.” He chuckled, combing the brush through her long, long, hair. She tried not to think about how his breath tickled her ear, sending tingles down her spine.

“I tolb ‘ou nod do call be that.” She huffed. Her mock anger easy to see through. It she’d really wanted him to stop, he would have done so immediately. “You’re righbt tho. You do neeb me. Who else can stob Fred’dy frob gleefully bestering beople on dates?”

“He’s not even here and you’re picking on ‘im?”

“I’b allobed to. It’s by twind given righbt.”

“Can’t argue with that.” Marcos’ hands worked quickly, twisting the strands into a roughly uniform braid. Whitney may have preferred a bun, but that just wasn’t in his skill set yet. As he worked, his own auburn curls wiggled loose. The ponytail must’ve come undone on his way over. He probably should just cut the shaggy mane, but he liked the feeling of it brushing his skin.

Whitney released her arm from the blanket burrito to playfully tug a strand. “You’re kinba a bess. Whab did ‘ou do, rub the whole bay?”

“Yup.”

His steady gaze caught her off guard. “Waib, really?” Whitney’s pink cheeks shifted much closer to a shade of red, causing Marcos’ brow to furrow. It didn’t help that she only seemed to heat up more when he pressed his hand to her forehead. She must’ve been really unwell, even her usually pale rabbit ears were tinted rose.

“Hold on. I think your tea should be ready.” He vanished back into the kitchen, retying his hair as he went.

The butterflies in Whitney’s brain were certainly just sickness making her dizzy. Nothing else. Mella stared at her. Judgementally. It wasn’t her fault her dumb heart was fluttering. Her pop rock pulse was obviously not her buzzing with giddiness. Of course she didn’t have a crush on Marcos. It didn’t matter how thoughtful he was, or how he made her feel special and appreciated with no ulterior motive. His gentle presence was just a part of him being Marcos. Falling for that would just be… well, it would be… Okay. She couldn’t lie to herself. Frog toes. It wasn’t the plague she’d managed to contract that made her face glow when he touched her. His concerned expression flashed across her mind. The tiny tilt of his scruffy eyebrows, the amber that almost glowed against the dark lines that always seemed to line his eyes, the way he looked at her. Oh dear, she melted into a goopy mess. Stars Above, she had Feelings for the scraggly hare. She had to compose herself. Pondering whether he felt something for her too would have to wait until he was gone. Working herself into a fluster was less than ideal. Upon the realisation, Mella smiled at her, in the way dogs do. If Whitney didn’t know better, she’d think Mella could read her mind. Why was she being so cocky? As if she figured it out first! Whitney’s mental rambling was interrupted by Marcos bringing in her lunch.

“Here. I put honey in the tea. It’s s’posed to be good for sore throats? Mum used to do that for me, honey and milk I mean. Should help you too.” His ears twitched self-consciously. Sure it was common knowledge that honey was a good soother, but he still felt the need to explain himself. Maybe because Whitney almost always preferred not to sweeten her teas and he hadn’t forgotten that. Whitney smiled, still too pink for his liking, thanked him and took a sip, evaporating his worries.

“There’s some medicine if you need it, and a bottle of water for later, y’know, so you don’t have to get up again… I’ve gotta head now or I’ll be late back. You gonna be okay?”

“I’b a big girl, I’ll be okay.” She took another sip. “Than’gs fo’ this. I abbreciate ib.”

“Not a problem. Just focus on betting better.”

“Oh byeah, before you go, there’s somb faze wibes in by roob. Take theb with you to geb rib ob the sweat. You brobably smbell.” To make certain she wasn’t being overly sincere, she poked her tongue at him.

“’course I do. I’m healthy so I can still breathe through my nose.” Marcos grabbed the wipes and darted out of the door before he had to face her faux fury.

It took a sprint, but he made it back to the café with just enough time to clean up and get re-dressed. He was tired as anything and had forgotten about his own lunch in the process of it all, but still found a spring in his step for the rest of the day. It was nice to think he might’ve made her feel a little better.

----------

Taglist

@inkovert and @snobbysnekboi

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zuucc · 6 years

Text

Netflix & chill?: A. Matthews I SMUT

Word count: 7,096

Smut: Yes

Summary: You and Auston are best friends with a hint of something more and Auston loves to tease you by calling your movie nights “netflix and chill”. This particular “netflix and chill” might live up to its name.

Author’s note: Can you tell that I am in love with Auston by now? Maybe. Feedback is greatly appreciated!!

Masterlist linked in bio

“Netflix and chill?” you rolled your eyes as you read the message you just got from Auston, your annoying best friend. “What?” Amber, your friend and fellow student asked. She was sitting across from you at the library, the two of you had spent the entirety of your Friday afternoon in the library at U of T, helping each other out with your assignments. “Just Auston being annoying,” you mumbled, putting your phone back down, deciding that he didn’t deserve a text back immediately - because he was being annoying. “What’s new? Tell me, when are the two of you gonna fuck?” she looked up from the book she had been trying to get something out of for the past two hours. “Shut up, Amber,” you said a little to loud, causing the only other person in the library on a Friday evening to shoot you a death glare. “Honey, if you can tell me that you can’t feel that sexual tension between yourself and Auston, you’re lying to me. Also, better do it before someone else does,” she lectured you. You decided to not answer her either and went back to reading the same three sentences you had been reading over and over again for the past twenty minutes.

“Fine, what did he text you that was so annoying that you couldn’t even bother to text him back?” she said after about ten minutes of silence. You had finally moved on to the next sentence, but looked up anyway. “How’d you know I didn’t answer him?” you squinted your eyes at her, already calling her bullshit. At first she shrugged, but gave up quickly when you didn’t let your squinting stare falter. “Fine, because he is now annoying me, asking me why you are leaving him on ‘read’,” she confessed. You rolled your eyes again, he really knew how to annoy you out of your mind. “He asked me to netflix and chill, which, before you say anything, means regular move night, not putting on a movie and then fucking before you’re five minutes in. And he knows that it annoys the shit out of me that he calls it that god awful, cliché, sexualised term,” you rage, putting on a fake smile to emphasise that you were done with the topic, before turning back to your book. “Well, please text him back, I don’t care what, but he is blowing up my phone,” she begged, showing you her locked iPhone that at the time showed five text messages from Auston that all said ‘Amber’. “Fine,” you mutter. “Also, you should go... to regular movie night, you deserve it, you’ve been here all day,” she said, sincerely. “Fiiiineeee,” you drag out the word, but you’re smiling.

“netflix & chill? no, absolutely not. movie night? yes. pick me up at the library.” you finally texted him back, poor boy had waited thirteen full minutes. “i’ll be there in ten, can’t wait to netflix and chill,” he quickly responded. You once again rolled your eyes as you read his text, but you couldn’t help but smile. “annoying asshole,” you replied before diving back into the book in front of you, figuring you could probably force yourself to read about two more sentences before he showed up.

You had managed to lay an entire paragraph behind you when you felt two strong arms snake around your neck. “Hey, babe. Hey, Amber,” Auston smiled before kissing your cheek. “Hey, asshole,” you smiled back. The entire school thought that you dated Auston Matthews - in fact, you were known as ‘the girl who dates Auston Matthews but doesn’t admit it’ - and when you thought about it, you didn’t blame them. You blamed Auston - he was handsy, clingy and everything in between, and only with you. To be honest, you loved it, you loved the attention and always having someone to cuddle or to give you a comforting hug when you really needed one. But he was Auston Matthews, the Auston Matthews, that everyone in the entire country of Canada knew who was. Having Auston Matthews hanging over your shoulders, holding onto your hand or kissing your forehead, meant a lot of unwanted attention for you. You even had haters - you didn’t really care about them, you just thought that they were pathetic for being jealous at someone like you. Most of them were pretty, blonde, party girls who just wanted to sleep with him. Whenever one of them would come up to you with a snarky comment, you would always reply with an overly sarcastic answer like ‘yes, he is soooo good in bed, couldn’t even come to school yesterday, I COULDN’T WALK’. It didn’t really help your case, but you loved seeing their reactions. Then later you would go to Auston’s and tell him how a couple of his puck bunnies had come up to you that day and he would laugh is ass of when you told him your answer.

“What’s up?” he asked, plopping down on the chair next to you. “Oh, you know, just hanging out, having the time of our lives,” you answered, looking over at him with the fakest smile you could manage. “Wow, you’re a delight,” he answered, just as sarcastically as you had. “How do you guys stand each other?” Amber looks up from her book to look at the two of you, finding Auston with his arm reached towards you, trying to ruffle your hair, and you leaning over the side of your chair, holding onto his wrist with both hands, trying to get away from him. “What? We love each other,” Auston smiles dumbly. “Clearly.. Please leave before Ms. physics over here tries to kill us all,” she whispered the last part, pointing over her shoulder at the girl who had been annoyed with you before Auston even came bursting in. “It will be my pleasure, Amber,” Auston answered, making you laugh while you shoved the last book into your backpack. “See, she loves me,” he then pointed out, making you put on a fake frown again. He then proceeded to steal your backpack out from your hands and running out of the building before you could yell another feminist lecture at him again - which you did whenever he tried to carry things for you, that you could obviously carry yourself. “Bye, Amber, see you Monday,” you said, quickly giving her a hug before you ran out after him, immediately finding your place under his arm with yours around his waist as soon as you caught up to him.

“So, do you want actual food or just snacks?” Auston asks, looking over at you, as the two of you walk into the grocery store closest to his place. “Uh, both?” you smile up at him, innocently. “Food wreck,” he mumbled under his breath. “Fuck off, Matthews,” you chuckled, grabbing some guacamole and some chips. “You know that guac is fake, right?” he comments, judging you. “Hey, just because it’s not as good as your mother’s does not mean that it’s fake. And we both know that you’re gonna eat just as much as me,” you argue, pointing your finger at him. You had met his mother once, and Auston had made sure that she made her famous guac for you before she left - and he was right, every other guac tasted low key shit after that, but it was still guac and it still filled your guacamole needs. Auston just rolled his eyes, knowing that you were right. You grabbed a couple of more things before heading to the check out, fighting Auston in front of the cashier to let you pay for the food, and then driving the last bit to his apartment.

You stepped into the elevator, holding onto the bag of groceries. Auston stepped behind you and you leant back, resting against him - tired after a long day of studying. An older woman stepped in just a second before the door closed and smiled at the two of you. “Where are you going?” Auston asked her kindly as you were stood right next to the buttons. “28th, thank you,” she smiled and Auston pressed the button placed a few rows down from the one you had pressed when you walked in. Auston then proceeded to put his arms around you, rubbing your arms in the chilly elevator. You looked up at him smiling thankfully and he kissed your temple. You turned your head back, meeting the older woman’s eyes. She smiled again, clearly thinking that you and Auston were together and that you lived together with him, nineteen floors above herself. The elevator came to a stop at the 28th floor and the woman looked directly at you before stepping out. “You should keep him,” she smiled, and then disappeared around the corner before you could say anything back. Not that you would know what to answer. Auston burst out laughing the second the doors shut. “Fuck off,” you mumbled, but couldn’t quite keep the smile off your lips. “She’s right though, you should keep me. I’m such a keeper,” he said, smirking. “Asshole,” you mumbled and looked up at the ever changing number over the door, waiting for the number to reach forty-seven. “But you love me, though,” he mumbled back, but you just kept quiet, patiently waiting for the blush on your face to fade out. Auston tightened his arms around you, hugging you to him.

Half and hour later you had just about licked the box of guacamole clean and you were twenty minutes into a terrible, clichéd Netflix original movie. “I’m cringing so hard, I might die,” you complained, squeezing your eyes shut as the short and awkward main character once again tried to kiss the girl that was about a light year out of his league (and a foot taller). “It’s not that bad,” he argued, but you opened your eyes just in time to see him cringe at the scene as well. “Can we just put on Friends or something?” you whined, reaching over to poke at him until he gave in. “Fine, but on one condition,” he said, pointing at you. You rolled your eyes and leant back in the sofa. “What?” you groaned. “You have to come over here and cuddle me,” he smiled, opening his arms. You pretended to be annoyed but you couldn’t quite hide your smile. This time he didn’t tease you about it, though, he knew better.

Auston grabbed the apple-tv remote and turned on a random episode of Friends. Both of you had watched all the seasons, so whenever you couldn’t agree on what to watch, you just turned on a random season and episode of Friends. You moved up on your knees and then laid down on top Auston, who laid on the other end of the sofa. His arms immediately embraced you. You placed your head on his chest and got comfortable. “Happy now?” you mumbled into his sweatshirt. “Mhm,” he breathed into your hair. “I think you’re pretty happy, too,” he then added, kissing your head. “Don’t push your luck,” you whispered, but moved one of your hands to the back of his neck, letting your fingers play with his hair, just like you knew he liked it.

You were halfway through the third episode of the night when Auston groaned. “Can we move? My ass is falling asleep,” he lifted his arms from your back. “Mm, but I’m so comfortable,” you whined, your head tucked in under his chin. “I promise you can be just as comfortable,” he begged. “I worked way too hard on these glutes for them to die and fall off,” he then added. You slowly lifted your body from his and stood up beside the sofa that you had been camped on for the last couple of hours. Auston looked up at you with big eyes, surprised at how easily you’d been convinced. “What? Auston, I would do anything to save your ass,” you said, seriously. He laughed and got up, stretched and jumped up and down a few times to get the circulation going again. “It’s that good, huh?” he smirked. “Yes, it’s gods gift to women and gay men,” you nodded, making Auston shake his head in disbelief. “You only love me for my ass,” he pretended to be hurt. “True,” you shrugged and laid back down on the sofa.

“What are you doing? We’re still going to cuddle,” Auston whined, not seeing the potential cuddling positions when you were sprawled out on your back. “Calm down, needy boy. We’re just trying something new,” you told him and pushed yourself to the edge of the sofa. Luckily, Auston had a huge ass sofa. “Stop calling me a needy boy,” he argued. “You are a needy boy. Lay down on your side here,” you patted the space between you and the soft sofa pillows. “I know, but you don’t need to use it as a nickname,” he mumbled, but did as you told him. This was what your relationship with Auston was about - constant cuddling and bickering/teasing back and forth. “I’mma nickname you whatever I want, needy boy. Now, you can lay on top of me without crushing me to death,” you smiled at him and he smiled back, fitting himself underneath your arm, resting his head on your chest - your hand immediately finding it’s way into his hair again. There had been multiple occasions where Auston had laid on top of you, and every time you had nearly died from lack of air. “This is great,” he sighed happily, clearly satisfied with the position he was in. “I know, right? It’s like you’re my human blanket,” you smiled, running your fingers through the hair on top of his head. “Mm, and your tits are great pillows,” he mumbled, literally into your tits. “Again, don’t push your luck,” you said, sternly, but not really minding the fact that Auston enjoyed your boobs - it wasn’t the first time he had commented on them. Let’s be honest - if it hadn’t been for Auston hitting on you at a bar two years ago, you wouldn’t even know each other today. You didn’t hook up with him, but his pick up line was too damn funny for you to let him go.

About seven episodes into what had turned into a Friends marathon, Auston started tracing circles on a little piece of bare skin, peaking out from underneath your sweater. By the eight episode, his entire hand was underneath your shirt, his thumb moving in a little circle on your waist, as the rest of his hand laid flat on your hipbone. Your focus slowly moved from the TV-screen to the feeling of his big hand on your bare skin. His hand moved upwards, so slow that you didn’t even know if it was intentional. His thumb was coming fairly close to the thin material of your bralette. “Aus,” you whispered. “Hm?” he responded. If you could even call that a response. “What are you doing?” you continued to whisper. “What?” he whispered back. You didn’t even know why you were whispering, and Auston was clearly unaware of what he was doing. When you didn’t answer, he lifted his head to look at you, only to find that your eyes was on his hand underneath your shirt. “Oh, shit, I’m so sorry,” he quickly pulled his hand out of your shirt. His cheeks turned red and he looked down, avoiding your eyes. “I didn’t think about what I was doing, I’m sorry if I,” you interrupted him. “No, hey, it’s fine, you don’t need to be embarrassed,” you told him sincerely, putting your hands on top of his shoulders, signalling for him to lay back down. He smiled shyly and kissed your cheek before laying back down on your chest.

His hand now laid still on your stomach and you found yourself wanting to touch his hand, kind off missing the way his hand felt on your skin. Your fingers were already running through his hair, it wasn’t like more contact would hurt. You moved your free hand on top of his, your fingers tracing his, until he tangled his fingers with yours. “Can’t keep your hands off me, huh?” he teased, lightheartedly. “You’re one to talk,” you snorted and you could feel him smile against your chest. And then he was quiet for a while again. Awfully quiet, didn’t even chuckle when Joey for some reason made a fool off himself for the hundredth time.

“Auston?” you whispered, thinking he might’ve fallen asleep. “Yeah?” he asked, leaning up on his elbow to meet your gaze. “You were just so.. quiet,” you smiled. “I was just thinking,” he smiled back, moving his hand to tuck some of your hair behind your ear. His hair had fallen in front of his eyes, and you tried to tuck it back like he had just done for you, but it kept falling back down. He chuckled at your many failed attempts. “It’s not going to stick. I’m pretty sure that all the product that was ever in my hair is on your hands now,” he told you, smiling sweetly, making a tiny blush creep onto your cheeks. “You say that like you don’t like it,” you mumble, looking away. “Oh, no, I love it,” he smiles again. It was something about the way he was smiling that made you blush, so you kept looking away from his gaze - or his smile. Auston laid back down, placing his head closer to your neck this time. You could feel his breath on your collarbone and you couldn’t get him out of your head.

“So, what where you thinking about, that made you so quiet?” you asked after a while, your finger tracing the back of his hand. He was quiet, you could only hear him breathing. He was quiet for so long that you didn’t think that he would answer. But he did, and his answer didn’t exactly help your case. A case that you didn’t understand. “You.. Us, I guess,” he mumbled into your shirt, his fingers once again taking hold of yours. His answer must’ve somehow weakened your vocal cords because you had a hard time finding your voice after that. “Okay?” you managed to get out after a while, hoping that he would tell you more without you having to fish it out of him. “Yeah,” he breathed, and you bit your lip hoping for more. You didn’t know what was going on, usually when the two of you got deep and serious it was about hockey or missing your families or stressing about uni, never about us. It had never been an us. You took a deep breath that somehow reminded Auston to talk.

“I just, I don’t even know what I’m thinking. It’s just me, and you, a lot of you, and this,” he spoke, lifting his body again, to meet your eyes. You nodded, unconsciously biting your lip. You didn’t even realize your were doing it, until you felt Auston’s thumb on your lower lip, carefully pulling it out from between your teeth. “Don’t do that,” he whispered, and you nodded, your eyes completely lost in his. His finger stayed on your lip for a while, before moving over your cheek, and then ending up cupping the side of your face. “You’re just,” he sighed, looking away from you, staring out into the room. “I’m what, Auston?” you whispered when he’d been quiet too long, your hand touching the side of his jaw, making him turn his attention back to you. “You’re my favourite person,” he shrugged, making the sides of your lips turn upwards. “You’re the only person that puts up with me, with my humour, with my clinginess and my constant need for physical contact, even if that changes so much for you. You’re still here, even if that means unwanted attention, and.. I know I only say that I love you when I’m like, joking and stuff, but I really do love you, and I hope you know that.” You nod your head yes, a small smile on your lips. Auston smiles, too, but bites his lip, scared he’d said too much. Scared that he stepped over a line with the ‘I love you’.

“Don’t do that,” you repeat his words, whispering, putting your thumb on his lower lip, just like he had done on yours. He released his lip, but you couldn’t make yourself remove your hand from his face. You slide your thumb over his cheek, feeling his stubble against your smooth skin. Auston closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He leans closer to you, resting his forehead against yours. You move your hand to the back of his head. “Fuck,” he mumbles under his breath and then his lips are pressed against yours, and you’re kissing him back and everything is perfect. Your lips part but then they’re right back on each other again, moving together like it was their purpose to do so. You find yourself wishing you’d done this before, but then again, no. You would have never gotten to know him like you do now if you’d fallen for his pick up line, instead of laughing at it. If you’d followed him home, instead of asking him to go get curly fries with you. If you had slept with him, instead of sitting in that diner until they were closing, laughing at each others jokes.

Auston pulled back to catch his breath, his eyes finding yours immediately. “I love you so much,” he whispered, letting his finger trace your swollen lip. “I love you, too, Auston, I really do,” you sighed, like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. Like you wouldn’t have to worry anymore. Everything you would ever need was right there in front of you, and you hadn’t even realised until now. The last two years you had spent comparing every potential partner to Auston. They were never funny enough, never kind enough, never cuddly enough, never tall enough, broad enough, hockey enough... They were never Auston enough. You spent the next minute smiling at each other, before you eventually decided that you wouldn’t want to spend another second of that night without your lips pressed against his, and you leant back in, fitting your lips to his like they were meant to be there.

Auston hummed against your lips, making you smile at the same time as it sent shock waves down to your core. Your lips slipped open and Auston took his chance to slip his tongue inside, lightly moving it against yours. His hand trailed from the side of your face all the way down to your waist, where he pulled you closer to him, making room for him to move you both to your sides. His hand slowly moved underneath your shirt, his palm pressing to the curve of your back, making you arch into him. Auston groaned as you did so and you finally realized which way your innocent kisses had quickly taken a turn. The voice in the back of your head said ‘this is moving too fast’, but the hand slowly sliding down your back towards your ass said something completely different - and your body apparently wanted to listen to that hand. You lifted your leg to let it tangle with his legs, Auston’s thigh moving in between yours. It was innocent at first - just a way of being even closer to each other - but then his hand moved down to your thigh, hiking your leg over his hip as his thigh moved higher, pressing against your heat. The action made a low moan slip from the back of your throat, but you didn’t know if Auston heard it, he was focusing on slowly rubbing his hand up and down your thigh, while making sure his tongue still tangled with yours.

Your hand went from Auston’s hair to feeling the muscles in his upper arm work when his hand gripped around your jeans clad thigh. From there, it went to fisting his sweatshirt, to sliding down his torso, slipping underneath it, slowly sliding over his abs, to his waist, to his back. Auston hummed against you, his lips starting a trail from your lips to your jaw, ending up underneath your ear, his breath creating goosebumps on your neck. “Mm, you’re handsy, aren’t you?” he spoke, softly, dragging wet lips down your neck. Normally you would have a witty response, but your brain didn’t work as fast as it usually did. “Shut up,” you breathed, pressing your heel into his ass, pushing him against you. The act not only resulting in a moan against your neck, but also the feeling of something hard against your hipbone. “Fine,” he chuckled lightheartedly and continued his trail of kisses down to your collarbone. His hand moved underneath your shirt again, his rough hands leaving you with goosebumps everywhere they touched your bare skin. You couldn’t help but dig your nails into his back muscles when he lightly bit into the skin over your collarbone, his tongue sticking out between his teeth. He groaned, moving onto the other side of your neck. You immediately tilted your head the other way, eager to feel his lips on your sensitive skin. He kissed his way all the way back up to your face, where he pulled back to look at you, all breathless and hot for him.

“Touch me,” you whispered, breathing heavily. You watched Auston’s reaction carefully, seeing his eyes light up and then darken. He smashed his lips to yours, while his hand moved down your front, quickly undoing the button and the zipper of your conveniently loose mom-jeans, before it slipped inside both your jeans and your underwear. His fingers immediately finding your wet slit, slipping in between your lips. “Fuck,” he cursed against your lips. “What?” you breathed, looking up and seeing Auston looking down to where his hand disappear into your underwear. “You’re so wet for me,” he whispered, like he was surprised - like he didn’t think you’d be wet after making out with him for twenty minutes. “Yeah?” you smiled, wanting to tease him for his stupid statement, but your voice was clearly affected by his fingers in your pants. He looked up at you with a wide grin on his face and you just shook your head in disbelief. “After you rejected me big time and sent me straight to the friendzone in that bar two years ago I guess I just never thought I could get you like this,” he said, his cheeks turning red at the same time. You couldn’t help but laugh and you were about to say something overly sarcastic and mean, but Auston let one of his fingers slip inside of you and you just ended up moaning way too loud - much to Auston’s amusement.

Auston pumped his finger in and out of you at a slow pace, adding a second one after a few minutes. Your breathing was heavier than ever and another loud moan rolled off your tongue when Auston finally found your clit, letting his thumb roll circles over it. You couldn’t concentrate on kissing him anymore, too caught up with the familiar feeling that slowly started to appear in your stomach. Auston’s lips once again trailed down your neck, stopping to suck at a spot he noticed was extra sensitive. You had a fistful of Auston’s hair in your hand, and one of his sweater in the other, feeling your high coming closer and closer. “Aus,” you breathed - your voice low but your breaths heavy. “Yeah, babe?” he spoke into your neck before looking up. “So close,” you breathed again, not being able to form a full sentence. You saw Auston smile - or more like smirk - and then his fingers started to move faster. His other hand went into your hair, grabbing a fistful too hold you in place, wanting you to look at him. You mentally thanked yourself for the time you had drunkenly told him about what you liked during sex - one of the things being hair-pulling. “Come on babe,” he encouraged you - his eyes looking straight into yours. And you came - hard - with a string of breathy moans.

Once your breathing had slowed, you open your eyes to see Auston with wide eyes and his mouth hanging slightly open. “What?” you chuckle, smiling. “That is... that is the most beautiful sound I have ever heard,” he said, in awe. “What? What sound?” you asked, not understanding what the hell he was talking about. “You coming, that like breathing-moaning thing you just did, fuck babe,” he explained and you felt like all the blood in your body rushed to your cheeks, your hands immediately going to cover your face. “No, stop, I mean it,” he grabbed your wrists, pulling them from your face. “It’s just embarrassing,” you whined, but your smile was wide and toothy.

You decided that you’d had enough attention for a while and turned the conversation, and your hands, over to Auston. You lowered your leg from his hip, just leaning your knee against his thigh instead, to give your hands more space. “But over to what you said earlier, did you really think that I wasn’t attracted to you? Just because I rejected you? Just because I didn’t fall for your pickup line?” you teased, as you slowly let your hand slide over his stomach and down to the rather big bulge in his pants. Auston swallowed hard, looking down at where your hand was sat, before quickly looking back up at you. “Uhm, no, not to sound like douche but like, I saw you look at me earlier that night, so I could tell that you either just thought that I was hot or something, or you knew who I was.. And usually my pickup lines work when they know who I am, and obviously if you know... it sounds so douche that I’m not even gonna say it again,” he told you, his breath becoming heavier by the second. “Mm, but I did knew who you were,” you told him, leaning in to kiss his jaw. “Yeah, but you knew a bit too much,” he chuckled, referring to what you had said to him that night.

‘Wow, Auston Matthews, the Casanova himself... Is that how you’ve managed too sleep with half of Toronto?’

“Hm, I thought I did, you proved me wrong,” you hummed into his neck. “Mhm,” he hummed back. “But it never meant that I didn’t find you attractive. Just because you think someone is attractive doesn’t mean that you wanna pounce - and also, one can change it’s mind,” you continue talking against his neck, your lips barely touching his neck. Auston didn’t answer, though. He groaned, hooking his hand underneath your body and pulling you up, closer to his face. His lips immediately pressed against yours, hands still pulling you closer. His hand finds its way inside your still open jeans, sliding down on your ass, grabbing a handful as his tongue slipped into your mouth. You moved on to elastic of his sweatpants, quickly slipping inside - both the pants and the boxers. You didn’t just hear him groaning, but you also felt it against your lips, and it sent shockwaves down to your heat. You started to slowly give him a hand job, loving the feeling off his heavy breath against the side of your face.

All of a sudden, Auston grabbed your wrist, holding your hand still. You pulled back to meet his eyes. “Do you really want this?” he looked so vulnerable - in more ways than one. Not just in the way that you literally had his most vulnerable body part in your hand, but also in a ‘please don’t break my heart’ kind of way. You let go of him and pulled yourself free from his grasp, placing your hand on his chest. “Auston,” you wanted his attention, fully. He took a deep breath and looked into your eyes. “I promise you that I want this, I didn’t know that you didn’t think that I.. That I didn’t like you like this? But I do, Auston. The past two years I’ve spent constantly comparing every guy, and girl for that matter, to you - and every single one came up short,” his expression softened and you moved your hand to the side of his face. “It took some time to understand why I did that and to admit it to myself, but it’s you, Auston, it’s always been you,” Auston kissed you immediately, and you kissed him back like your life depended on it.

This time, the kiss wasn’t rushed, it was heated and deep and passionate, but it was slow and loving, like you had all the time in the world to kiss each other. Auston pulled you even closer, hugging you to him as you laid beside him on the sofa, your legs tangled with his. Your shirt moved up your back, his hand slowly sliding it up, wanting to feel every part of your soft skin while he removed it from your body. As soon as it was off you, you started on his shirt, wanting to feel his skin against yours. While you were at it, Auston climbed back over you, stilling to take you in and let his hands run over your stomach and your waist, before lightly moving his thumb over your nipple, which clearly showed through your thin bralette. You reached out for him, pulling him down on top of you. Your lips are back on each other in seconds, like they’re magnetic polars always attracting the other. Your hands ended up on his back and in his hair, grabbing onto whatever could help you keep him close to you forever. You arched your back and Auston’s hand slipped underneath you, unclasping your bra. He pulled away from you to remove it, leaving you with a lingering kiss. He stopped to admire your bare breasts, his fingers lightly dancing over the incredibly soft skin. He bent back down, but let his lips move over your nipples before slowly kissing his way back up to your lips. His hand stayed on your breast, massaging it, while he focused on having his lips on yours.

You let your hand slide down his chest and over his torso, feeling his muscles working underneath your fingertips. You hooked your legs around his hips, using your feet to help you push down his sweatpants. Auston kicked them off and quickly moved onto yours. Sitting up on his knees to slide your jeans down your thighs and letting them fall to the floor. He then moved his fingers in between your thighs, leaving a trace of goosebumps from your knees to your heat. His fingers hooked into the sides of your lacy underwear - his eyes moving back to yours, asking for consent before taking them off. You nodded and they ended up on the floor with the rest of your clothes. His thumb disappeared into your slit, dipping into you before sliding up to your clit. “Aus,” you moaned and sat up, getting up on your knees to reach him, pressing your lips to his. You pushed his boxers down his thighs and took him into your hand again, giving him a few tugs as his hands ended up on your behind, one hand grasping your cheek and the other disappearing in between your legs. A finger slid inside you while he, at the same time, pulled you closer to him, pressing his erection in between your bodies.

Auston’s hand moved to the back of your thighs, dragging your knees from underneath you, making you fall back on the couch. You giggled and he smiled back at you. It was one of those wide, real and genuine smiles, that very few were able to get out of Auston. You were lucky enough to be one of those few. He stood up beside the sofa and let his boxers fall down his legs. You watched him as he stood, a hand on his member, looking around himself. “I need to get a condom,” he mumbled as he turned towards his bedroom, but your quickly reached out and grabbed his wrist. “I’m on the pill,” you breathed, desperate to have him back in your arms. “You sure you don’t wanna?” he asked, standing over you. “As long as you’re clean I don’t see why not,” you smiled, placing your hand on his cheek. He nodded, big smile on his face. He climbed back on top of you, carefully laying down between your legs.

He moved his lips to press against yours, one hand underneath your head and one caressing your waist - sometimes moving further up and touching the side of your boob. His erection laid pressed against your heat, teasing your clit. You spread your legs out further, giving him more room. He moaned when more of your wetness came to touch him. He slid down your body, but just a couple of inches. His face was so close to yours that you could feel his breath on your slick and swollen lips, and he stared into your eyes as he took hold of himself and slowly pushed inside you. You watched as his mouth fell open and his eyes closed. “Mm, you feel so good,” he hummed as he nuzzled his face into your neck, stilling to let you adjust to his size. You were thankful for his patience, Auston was big and you needed your time to get comfortable. “Just tell me when you’re ready, okay?” he said, his hand moving to caress your cheek. You laid still for a little while longer before you half whispered-half moaned into his ear. “I’m ready.” Auston came back up and kissed you, and let his lips stay on yours as he slowly pulled back out and then thrust back in. His movements paired with the slow and sensual kissing provoking a moan from you.

His hand roamed over your body - finger trailing over your nipple, before cupping and massaging your breast, then moving on to your hip, before it disappeared behind your back and he pressed you closer to himself. And then his hand ended up on your thigh, slowly moving a flat hand up and down the back of it, before he hooked his hand behind your knee and hiked your leg up on his hip. This gave him a deeper angle, letting him hit places inside you he hadn’t been able to reach before. Your mouth fell open against his lips, low, breathy moans escaping. His hand kept sliding up and down your thigh, his calloused fingertips leaving goosebumps on your soft skin. Auston moved his lips to your neck, making sure the moans that came out of your mouth never stopped. You moved your hand down his back, letting your other hand stay on the back of his neck with a fistful of his hair between your fingers. You moved your other leg over his hip as well, securing them together around him.

This urged Auston to speed up a little bit. He upped his tempo as he let his lips move down your throat, leaving lingering kisses above your collarbones. His thrusts were still kind of slow, but they were harder and he hit the right spots every time. Your fingers dug into his back and you tightened your legs around him, feeling the knot in your stomach become unbearably tight by the second. You heard Auston’s breathing become heavier and every once in a while, groans made an appearance in his throat. “Babe?” he started but you answered his question long before he could ask. “I’m so close,” you breathed, turning your head towards him and he placed his lips back on yours.

His hand moved in between your bodies, moving down until he could place his thumb on your clit. Your legs, as well as your insides, clenched around him as he managed to get you even closer to your high. The sound of Auston’s deep moans and heavy breaths also helped you closer to what would be your second orgasm of the night. At this point, you weren’t really kissing anymore, it was just open mouths against each other, while you both panted and moaned. “Babe,” Auston moaned, and you knew that he could barely hold it in anymore. “Let go,” he encouraged, putting extra pressure on your clit while he still pushed in and out of you. And you let go with a long, breathy moan, As soon as Auston felt your walls clench around his member he let go as well, lazily thrusting into you a few more times, eyes clenched and a long and groan coming out of his open mouth, before he collapsed against you with his head falling to your chest.

You had unclenched your legs from him and now you were just tracing circles and lines on his back with your fingers. Auston’s head was tucked underneath your chin and he, just like you, was tracing patterns on your skin. “You don’t have work tomorrow, right?” Auston asked, his eyes focused on the patterns he was drawing with his finger. “No, why do you ask?” you hum into his hair. “Do you have something else planned?” he asked, not really answering your question. “Should probably do my assignment, but you know, I can finish that on Friday...” you answered, sensing were this conversation might be going. You could feel him smile into your chest and you move your hand up to lightly ruffle his hair. He got up on his elbows to look at you. You met his stare with loving eyes, adored by his tired eyes and messy hair. “I was just hoping that you’ll stay the night and like, the entire day and maybe that night again,” he smiled shyly. “Of course, Auston,” you chuckled, pressing a kiss to his lips. “Good, ‘cause I’m going to bed right now and I was i no possible way going to accept sleeping alone tonight,” he chuckled as well, before he quickly pulled out of you, got up and lifted you up - making you squeal.

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