#every single reasonable argument or plan will not work

[lovebugism]

“oh, if i had known that’s all it would take for you to shut up i would’ve done this ages ag-“ “only finish that sentence if you have a death wish” with steve & punchy? <3

ty for requesting :D — steve makes a stupid joke and figures out what makes you tick (steve x punchy, hurt/comfort-ish, 0.9k)

bug's one year celebration ♡

The argument started as a joke. And honestly, you kinda started it, so you have no reason to be as angry about it as you are now. You’re the one who said you hated Steve’s singing. It was only right he argued playfully back.

“What are you talking about?” he scoffed as he climbed into bed beside you, freshly showered and smelling like your shampoo. “My singing is amazing.”

“Okay, Kermit the Frog,” you quipped, giggling.

“You know who’d like my singing?”

Your eyes narrow when he cuddles into your side. “Who?”

“Tammy Thompson,” he answered with a knowing smile.

He should’ve known he was playing with fire then.

“The girl who sounds like Miss Piggy?”

“Yeah,” Steve hummed, shrugged two freckled shoulders. “Maybe I should be dating her instead.”

You knew he was joking. Steve was a dumbass, but he wasn’t mean. He’d never say something like that with the intent to hurt you. He did anyway, though. His words take you by surprise, and you go silent. And that’s when Steve knows he’s said the wrong thing. Because his oh, so lovely loudmouth Punchy is never silent.

“I’m kidding!” he exclaims when you turn away from him. You cross your arms over your chest and shift softly on the mattress — playfully pouty in your way but meaning every bit of it. “Punchy. C’mon. You know I didn’t mean that.”

He reaches out for you and wraps a golden arm around your shoulder. You shrug, flinching away from him. “Don’t touch me,” you murmur, even though you don’t really mean it. ‘Cause, yeah, you’re a little upset, but you love when he coddles you.

You’re grateful when he only hugs you tighter.

“Why not?” he argues and leans in to kiss your cheek. His plush lips just barely graze your jaw before you duck away from him. He laughs loud in your ear, as golden as honey.

“It’s not funny. Steve! That wasn’t nice!”

“Don’t be like that, babe. It was just a stupid joke.”

You turn your chin to your shoulder to glare at him, just so he can see your unamused pout from head-on. He meets your glower with a grin and tries to peck you. You turn away before he can. “Go kiss Tammy Thompson.”

“Punchy…”

“Steve…” you say in the same low tone.

“If I wanted Tammy Thompson, I’d be with her.”

You know he’s trying to comfort you. He chose you because he wanted to be with you, and he didn’t choose Tammy because he didn’t want to be with Tammy. You know that’s what he means, but it sounds like King Steve is saying it.

“Oh, really?” you squint.

Steve shrugs. “Yeah. She was obsessed with me. You know that. Hell, everyone knew that.”

“Why? ‘Cause everyone was obsessed with you, King Steve?”

He figures you must be calling him that to hit a nerve. He’d hurt your feelings (even though he truly hadn’t meant to), and now you want to hurt his back. And it might’ve worked if the way you said it didn’t turn him on.

He likes you all riled up like this, he quickly realizes. Now he just wants to keep poking at you, make you that tiny bit more mad. So, with a very smug smile on his pink lips, he answers. “Yeah… Kinda.”

His plan works.

“Okay, news flash, just because you’re pretty and you have nice hair doesn’t make you less of an asshole, alright?” you argue without taking a single breath. “Actually, for a long time, you were the biggest asshole I had ever met— and sixteen-year-old me would be gagging if she knew I was in your bed right now.”

“Yeah?” he eggs on, pressing his lips to your warm shoulder where the neck of your too-big sweatshirt had fallen.

“Yeah, actually! I mean, you were boorish and vapid and totally incorrigible—”

“I don’t know what any of that means,” he mumbles against you and continues pressing little kisses to your warming skin.

“—And the fact that Tammy Thompson, let alone anybody, could’ve been obsessed with someone like you back then is totally…” His lips find your pulse point then, wet and sanguine. The words get jumbled up in your head, and you forget how to say them out loud.

You feel Steve’s mouth curl into a smirk against your neck. He knows he’s got you in the palm of his hand now. “Is totally what?” he teases, muffled into your skin.

“Shut up and keep kissing me,” you murmur.

He listens to you, because he always listens to you, but it’s hard to when he’s smiling so wide. His lips sprinkle up the length of your neck and over your jaw. He pulls away with a rosier, softly swollen mouth.

His smile is gentle and lopsided. “If I’d known that’s all it took to get you quiet, I would’ve done it forever a—”

You reach for him suddenly, splaying your palm over his mouth — pinky under his nose and thumb over his stubbly chin. Your eyes narrow. “Only finish that sentence if you have a death wish,” you mutter in a low, threatening tone. “Nod so I know you understand me.”

He nods into your hand.

“If you still want me to be your girlfriend tomorrow, only talk to tell me how much you love me and that you hate Tammy Thompson.”

You feel his smile widen beneath your palm. He nods again.

You pull your hand away. 

“Now kiss me.”

The fucker takes the breath from your lungs.

#published by bug #steve harrington x reader #stranger things x reader #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington #stranger things #stranger things imagine #stranger things fic #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things fanfic #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #st drabbles #stevie drabble #event: bug turns one

[bonesandthebees]

guys. we are missing out on the potential of an elementary school PTA au for qsmp. think real housewives kind of drama. quackity is the PTA president because he's old friends with a lot of the school board even though he doesn't show up to like half the meetings because he's busy. there's so much gossip about who the father of his kid is and he definitely gets judgemental side eye from the other parents about it. tilin is doing well at least? even if they do spend more time at roier and jaiden's house than their own sometimes.

bad is another other single parent but he doesn't get gossiped about because he always runs the bake sale fundraiser and does a great job at it so no one wants to upset him. bad and dapper are the type of parent child duo where bad keeps dapper up to date on ALL the drama going on with the other parents (to a child friendly degree) and dapper is going to grow up to be the worst gossip just like his dad.

no one knows what the fuck is going on with charlie and mariana's marriage. if you ask charlie they're in the middle of a divorce. if you ask mariana they're doing perfectly well they just got into a couple's spat this week and charlie is dramatic. what do you mean it happens every week? no no you misunderstood they're doing fine they're definitely not getting a divorce. literally the only thing they have going for them is how both of them went to bat for juanaflippa when she told them she was a girl it's the sole reason the other parents respect them. what's a more pressing issue is that juanaflippa keeps trying to start fights on the playground and instead of discouraging her charlie and mariana both cheer her on and give her lessons on how to punch people.

phil is one of the older parents and is already experienced since he has an adult child and wasn't planning on having another, but he's done the parent game before which is probably part of why chayanne is at the top of his class while also excelling in his karate classes, softball practice, cross country team, etc. missa is his trophy husband who's just happy to be there. literal "she's everything / he's just ken" moment.

yknow when there's that one mom in the PTA group who is very stereotypically attractive and everyone is convinced she was the mistress for her current husband and caused his last divorce? that's foolish. no one trusts him to be around their partners despite the fact that he didn't cheat!!! at the same time, the minute doors are closed everyone is trying to flirt with him and gets frustrated when he insists he's loyal to vegetta. at least leonarda seems happy.

jaiden and roier are like the picture perfect parents with bobby. he and chayanne constantly compete for the top spot in their class. both jaiden and roier work as lawyers and there was a rumor going around that they were representing charlie and mariana respectively for potential divorce number 3 but this didn't seem to cause any tension between them. roier takes over to lead the PTA meetings when quackity can't make it while jaiden sits in the corner awkwardly trying to keep charlie from getting into an argument with mariana again.

no one has seen spreen in ages. there's another rumored divorce going on between him and fit but instead of making it as public as charlie and mariana's problems fit just makes snide comments about his absent husband here and there.

tallulah transferred to the school in the middle of the year and phil invited wilbur to the PTA meetings so he could be involved in the school. quackity and wilbur are exes and while wilbur insists tilin isn't his kid no one quite believes him. he's a very young single parent though and clearly has no idea what he's doing so even if it's a bit strange that his kid is almost the same age as his little brother chayanne, the other parents are relieved that phil seems to be taking the reigns to help him out. also wilbur is a famous musician and he's gotten asked for autographs from some of the other parents of kids in tallulah's class.

dan and maxo only showed up to the first PTA meeting and never came back. trump transferred schools and no one has heard from them since.

#help this setting is just so funny to me #the drama potential is insane #qsmp #qsmp pta au

[shallyouobeyme]

Map

Platonic!Yandere!Damian x reader (GN)

Summary: Damian and you have to work on a project together and he realizes how you seem to be invisible to everyone else - how you want to be invisible - and something in him makes him want, no need, to figure out why...

! Minors Do Not Interact !

TW: Domestic abuse (not shown directly), planned kidnapping, Dark content, yandere, This is all fiction, I do not condone this

Day 4 of my Yandere Writetober, Tomorrow word is 'Golden' so if you have any ideas lemme know

People did not think Damian was sentimental, most of all his family. If a person had an idea of who Damian was, but wasn’t close to him or hasn’t personally met him then they could probably still assume that in private he might be a bit more emotional than in public. This person would be wrong though. Sure, in private Damian might be a little more open and showed a few more emotions, but most of those were rage, pettiness and sarcasm. Damian was a lot of things, but definitely not sentimental. At least not usual. And then you came into his life. 

From the moment he was born, Damian had a map of how exactly his life would be played out. Then he was brought to his family and the map changed. From wanting to become the next head of the League of Assassins, he now wanted to become the next Batman. He wanted to step up once his father needed to step down and take his rightful place as the head of the family. Alone.

Everyone and everything else that was a hindrance in that way - be it his age, school, villains, friends or even his own family - was just an obstacle on the map of his life. He thought you'd be just the same, a Problem to be taken care of and to leave behind. Just another annoying child in his class - which Bruce insisted he attend - that weren't fit for the reality of life he faced every single day. It was just typical that he had to be stuck with you working on a project for a class in which he had a grade to make up, because of too many absences. He didn't bother to question why you had to do the project, he just wanted to get it over with.

"I'll be doing the project - I doubt you could help anyways - and you can just put your name on it as well, then I don't have to bother with you," Damian sneered to you once class was disbanded, already more than done with you and with the situation. You seemed to turn into yourself and he recognized how shy and intimidated you were and if he had been just a tad more empathetic he'd feel bad. Damian rolled his eyes and turned to leave when your hand tugged on his uniform's blazer.

"Uhm... I-I'm sorry, but-but I'd really like to-to work on the project together, I-I really need this grade," you stuttered, your head lowered in shame, even though you had no real reason to be ashamed. Damian wanted to make a snide comment about how the project was definitely better off if he was doing it on his own, but something about how small and fragile you looked kept him from doing so.

That was the first detour from the life on his map. That moment of emotion that no one witnessed, not even you because of how your head was held down. And it was only the beginning. He scoffed at your request, but it wasn't truly malicious like before.

"Fine, but we'll do it at your place today after school, no discussion," Damian stated and left no room for arguments, turning around and leaving the room, not hearing your small sound of protest.

During the rest of the school day, Damian couldn't help but watch you from the corner of his eyes, he saw how you were hidden in your uniform, seemingly wanting to merge with the backdrop of the classroom, how you kept completely to yourself and seemingly managed to become completely invisible to anyone but him and some of your teachers.

So after school, he had to keep his eyes peeled open to see you come out since you really seemed to disappear between all the other students. He went over to you and told you to lead the way home, not bothering to offer to have Alfred drive the two of you since, for reasons he didn't understand himself, he wanted to spend the time with you alone. Detour number two.

The way to your home was spent in silence, Damian looking around sceptically and you turned into yourself like you always seemed to be. The route to your home took you out of the more or less safe and high-income neighbourhood of Gotham Academy to the less secure area not that different from the region around Crime Alley. He wondered how your parents were able to afford your tuition for Gotham Academy, but he knew that you were rather good in school so he figured you were on a scholarship.

When you finally arrived at a rundown apartment complex you brought him to a flat on the fifth story, carefully opening the door as if you were afraid of making any sound.

"I'm sorry if it's a bit messy," you mumbled vaguely in his direction as you carefully opened the door and Damian realized it was the first thing he had seen you say since you had asked him to let you work on the project as well. Then you lead him into the apartment and everything somewhat fell into place.

To say it was a bit messy was an understatement. There were empty bottles of beer, vodka, wine and all other kinds of alcoholic beverages, Damian even caught sight of some less legal substances, but he decided not to mention them aloud, already seeing based on the darkening colour of your face and the way you tried to avoid looking anywhere near him that you were highly ashamed and emberassed. Detour number three.

He saw how you looked through the open doors into the other - not cleaner - rooms and he could hear your relieved sigh when there was no one else in there with the two of you. Then you lead him into your room if one could call it a room, which had a size just barely big enough for a measly small bed, a box usually meant for laundry filled with your clothes and a small desk that looked like you had taken it from the side of the road. There was no chair or even a stool.

Damian noticed Jason's influence - much to his anger - when his first thought was that 'Harry Potter would feel bad for you'. His next thought was that you didn't deserve to live like that, that you deserved better. Detour number four brought him right off of the road like never before.

"Uhm... You-You can sit on the bed if that's okay, I'll-I'll sit on the floor, then we can work on the project," you spoke hesitantly and shuffled to sit on what little space was left on the floor, but was stopped when Damian pulled you to sit beside him on the bed.

"There's enough space here for both of us," he argued and turned to you. "But- uhm- we don't have any space for the project then."

You were right, he supposed, as he saw that both of you sitting on the bed were basically taking up all the mattress had to offer. He sighed and decided that he was already neck deep into whatever was happening so he might as well see where it was going.

"Then we won't do the project today," he stated in the same tone that left nothing up for discussion and you seemed almost relieved, "We can work on it tomorrow after school in the library."

"O-Okay, I'm sorry it's so-" You stopped in your tracks, seemingly on the verge of tears, and then gave it another go, "-I'm sorry you came here for nothing, I can lead you to the door."

"I'm not leaving yet," Damian said much to your surprise as he saw the shock displayed on your face, "first I want you to tell me what is going on here." He tried to tell himself that it was just his vigilante persona shining through, but deep inside he knew it was you that made him so curious about this situation.

"What do you mean?" you squeaked, obviously - but badly - trying to hide something. Damian let his instincts lead him as he quickly took your hand and pulled up your sleeve, he had been noticing how you were playing with it every time you were scared or ashamed. He wasn't all too surprised to see blue, purple, green and yellow splotches littered over the area, some bruises new, some old. You tried to pull your hand away, but Damian's grip stayed strong.

He pulled your hand even closer to him as he inspected the arm and asked: "Did your parents do that to you?" He looked up at your face and saw tears welling up in your eyes. It made you look even more fragile and delicate than he already thought you looked like throughout the day, but it also made this rage well up inside of Damian. How dare these people make you cry, how dare they hurt you. He wanted to rip them apart, wanted to make sure nothing and no one ever hurt you again.

"Tell me the truth, I will help you, I promise," Damian encouraged you and received a weak nod from you as your tears started to flow down your face in streaks. "Okay, give me a second, I'll be right back, don't worry." Damian used his blazer's sleeve to gently wipe away some of the tears - something that his family would believe to be a lie if you had told him about it - and got up to leave the room to call Alfred to come pick him and you up.

He told Alfred that he'd be inviting a friend for a sleepover, hanging up on a too-stunned-to-speak Alfred who was surely already on his way to inform Bruce of this new development, he didn't bother to tell him that he planned for it to be a more... permanent... sleepover.

You needed him, you needed him to protect you, to care for you, to make sure you never again had a reason to cry. You were such a pure, fragile soul, one that didn't deserve to be left alone in this cruel world, he was sure that once his father had met you he'd understand. He'd feel the same way. You'd be safe with them, they'd become your family, the family you deserved and needed.

And if Bruce didn't agree if Bruce told him that he was crazy, that he couldn't just take you away from your life, no matter how bad it was, and take over your entire existence... well, he had already become ready to derail his entire plan, had become ready to redraw the entire map of his life just for him to have you along, so he might as well return to his roots because he was sure his mother would be more than happy to take you in as long as it made Damian return...

#yandere #writetober #x reader #platonic #platonic yandere #tw: yandere #dc x reader #batfam x reader #batfamily x reader #platonic damian wayne #damian wayne x reader #damian x reader #platonic robin x reader #robin #dc universe #platonic dc universe #platonic!yandere #dark!damian wayne #dark content #tw: abuse #yandere bruce wayne #yandere talia al ghul

[ggrapeejuicee]

Right Person. Wrong Time

harry styles angst

summary: Harry’s fame puts you in danger, and he can’t let himself be the reason you get hurt

word count: 1.1k

— — —

Harry was half way through a residency as Madison Square Garden. The whole world loved him. He’d been crowned the new king of pop.

You’d left the show half way through to grab some food, and ended up wandering to take in the pretty lights of the city.

He’d barely spoken to you this morning, leaving the hotel room barely uttering a goodbye. He didn’t tell you his plans for after the show or what time he’d be back at. The past few days he’d been distant. It was unlike him considering how close you’d been for the past few months.

Apart from rehearsals and performing you’d been practically inseparable since you started dating, but now it sort of felt like he was slipping away.

He got back to the hotel room after midnight, you had reruns of an old sitcom from your childhood playing on the TV while you had been waiting for him.

“You’re late tonight.” You smile at him as he comes through the door.

“Yeah.” He says gruffly.

“You okay?” You ask, “You’re usually in a more talkative mood.”

“Been a long day.” He shrugged.

“Yeah I get it. I just feel like we haven’t spent much time together recently.”

“Yeah, because I’m working.” He snapped, “I’ve had a show like every day.”

“No, I know that-”

“Well clearly not.”

“I was just trying to be nice, no need to go all moody on me.” You roll your eyes.

“You just don’t understand what it’s like for me.”

“I don’t understand?” You scoffed, “Harry I’ve given up everything for you. I cancelled the lease on my apartment, I quit my job, I left my fiancée. Just so I could come with you on this damn tour.”

“I didn’t fucking ask you to do any of that.” He said angrily, “You done all of that on your own, don’t fucking blame that on me.”

“Stop yelling at me.”

“Then stop being a fuckin’ brat.”

You shook your head, not believing what was happening right now.

“I told you that this wasn’t going to work out, right from the beginning. I told you we should’ve just left it in Miami, but you wanted to keep it going.”

“We both wanted to keep it going, you were just too much of a coward to commit yourself to it. You can’t commit, Harry, to anything.”

He slammed his fist against the wall, knuckles turning red with the force he hit the plasterboard. His face was red with anger. With a combination of his drunken state and the heat of this argument, this was one of the worst tempers you’d ever seen from him.

“I commit. I commit every single day. To this job, this life.”

“But you can’t commit to me?” You shout, tears welling up in your eyes, “I’m just asking for a little respect here.”

“This just isn’t working out.” He said.

You’d tried to stay strong throughout this, but as soon as those words left his lips you couldn’t help but to start crying. Tears flowed down your cheeks and sobs escaped your mouth.

Harry just stood and watched.

He stood emotionless, watching you break down in front of him, every emotion you were feeling was caused by him and he looked as if he didn’t care.

“I think you should go back to Miami. Coming on the rest of the tour isn’t a good idea.”

You felt sick. You felt like you were going to vomit everywhere. A mixture of different thoughts flooded your brain.

Where would you go? You had no apartment.

How would you get a flight? You had no money.

Harry had made a promise to you that he’d take care of you while he was on the road, and now he’s here breaking that promise in a million different ways.

“You’re an asshole.”

“You should’ve listened to me before. This wouldn’t be happening right now.”

“So what went wrong, huh? You bored of me? You found someone else? Or has the alcohol just made you honest for the first time since I’ve known you.”

“God, I’ve not found someone else. There is no one else can’t you fucking see that?”

“Then why are you doing this? Why are you hurting me for no reason.” It was hard to breathe through the crying. It had already been a long day, but coming home to this had made it so much worse, “You’re standing there watching me get myself into such a state and you look like you couldn’t care less.“

“There’s always a reason.” He shouts, “Always a fucking reason.”

“Then you need to tell me. Help me understand why you’re just giving up on this. On us.”

Your heart was beating out your chest. This man, in the few months you had been together, had become your whole life. And now you were loosing him for what seemed like forever.

“If something happened to you I’d never forgive myself.”

“Nothings going to happen, you’re being ridiculous.”

“Those photographers yesterday were just the start. Ever since people found out about us, your whole safety has been jeopardised. I will not let anything happen to you because of me.”

“Harry-”

“No.” He interrupts, “You wanted an explanation so let me talk.”

“As long as you’re with me you’re not safe. People will stalk you and invade on your privacy for as long as I’m in the public eye. This isn’t the life either of us want for you.”

“I don’t give a shit about all of that, I just want you.”

“I can’t let you give up all your privacy just for me. That’s not fair.”

“This should be my decision, Harry.” You argue.

He shakes his head.

“Why couldn’t you just tell me, instead of putting on the whole asshole act.”

“I needed you to listen. I still need you to listen.”

“I am listening.”

“Well you’re not hearing me properly then. We need to be over. We can’t keep this,” He gestures between you both, “up, because it means you’re not safe.”

“Then up the security, get me a bodyguard.”

He shakes his head, and for the first time since this conversation began you could see sadness in his eyes.

“You and I both know that you don’t want a bodyguard following you around for the rest of your life.”

He reaches for your hand, placing his lips against the back of it softly.

“I’ll sort out a flight and somewhere for you to stay, don’t worry about that. This isn’t what I want to happen, it’s what needs to happen. And if somehow, somewhere in the future we’re brought back together then we will be. Just… Not right now.”

Deep down you knew he was right. The insane photographer trying to get in your cab the other night was a step too far, and no doubt something like that could happen again on a bigger more dangerous scale.

But you didn’t want to loose him.

Right person. Wrong time.

#harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles au #harry styles one shot #harry styles smut #harry styles fic #fanfic #harry styles fanfic #angst #harry styles angst #angsty fanfic #fanfiction #one direction

[twinklelilstarkey]

Tutor: Long Overdue

Words: 3k+ Type: Some angst, but fluff Summary: The days after the argument. Warnings: Rafe is the softest boyfriend in the world. Y/N has some problems with overthinking and anxiety here. Mentions of alcohol. Mentions of narcissist friends. A filler chapter for you to take a breath in the middle of the angst.

Tutor Masterlist

I do NOT give you permission to repost my work. If you’d like to read my stories on other platforms, you can find them on my Wattpad and AO3.

You wish you could say that everything went by smoothly after that conversation. But you would be lying if you said so.

When you got out of that car, your hands were visibly shaking. It was out of your control. It was a mix of all your emotions just building up inside you and wanting to come out all at once. It was the frustration, the anger, the disappointment, and the sadness. You hated every single second of that conversation. How helpless you felt at times. The way your supposed friends looked at you as you spoke. It was as if you had gone insane.

Thankfully, when inside the house, Wheezie had run upstairs for a quick shower before your tutoring class, or else she would’ve seen you cry your eyes out in front of her brother. You felt weak for doing so, but you still did it. You cried the entire time you told Rafe everything about what had happened. You noticed how he had no idea what to say or what to do for you, other than give you comfort. And you let him do it, as that felt like what you needed too.

When Wheezie had come back downstairs with her things - since she wanted to study outside this time - you had already wiped your tears clean and didn’t feel like you would cry at every sentence that left your lips. To your luck, your eyes didn’t appear too puffy when she laid her eyes on you, which spared you from many questions.

By the time you were helping her study, Rafe still kept a close eye on you. He would never disappear from your view for too long, always either sitting on his phone on the porch or coming out to the table near the pool, where the two of you were. He made you and Wheezie laugh from time to time.

It lifted your mood ever so slightly, but deep down you still were filled with worry and hurt. How far could this go? Could the girls go further than this? Maybe by telling other people, or simply talking to their other friends about this. Was there a possibility this could get to your parents before you even had the chance of finishing high school as you had planned?

All these questions, they made worry bubble in your blood at the most random of times during that afternoon. By the end of it, Ward and Rose eventually came home. Rafe was by the island of the kitchen when Rose stepped out of the kitchen to get you your monthly paycheck, and Sarah Cameron stood in that kitchen for a single second, and the first thing she said to you was: “Are you okay? You look… down.”

If that did anything to you was to force yourself to put on a better act. You were just about to go home as Ward had asked for Rafe to drive you. You didn’t want your parents to see you and ask the same things. It would be harder to lie to them than to Sarah.

You two sat in the car in silence for a bit, and you could feel Rafe’s eyes on you. Silence only gave you the excuse to want to cry more, even when you still felt ridiculous for it. You tried to hold it back, but whenever a tear would slip, Rafe was there. He calmed you down and held your hand or sometimes said something that would make your heart hurt less.

At home, you forced yourself to make conversation with your parents - knowing that if you didn’t, they would’ve followed you to your room to find a reason behind your silence. All of it was forced and unnatural small talk, but your parents didn’t seem to notice. Your mom was too focused on making a new recipe for dinner, and your dad was too focused on his reading to look up from the book in his hands.

The rest of the day wasn’t any easier. Rafe asked if you wanted to come over, but you know that it wouldn’t make anything easy. It would simply make your feelings go temporarily numb. You didn’t need that. You needed to just face it for what it is: a stupid confrontation that you saw coming from a mile away because it had to happen eventually. It just came sooner than you expected.

Sleep didn’t come easy either. By the time you finally fell asleep, there weren’t many hours of rest before having to get up for class. You hid whatever hints of your exhaustion with make-up, as well as put on a happier expression just so you could make your way through the house and to school without any questions coming from your parents.

Breakfast was uneventful, just like dinner the day before. And your dad drove you to school just as you had planned beforehand.

In class, if you were used to the girls' looks before, this day had been another level of staring. And given the fact that you share every class with each of them, your sadness and worry quickly turned into anger by lunch hour. They didn’t try to speak to you or even ambush you all at once again. They just sat there at their little tables watching you as if you were some experiment about to go wrong.

Kristy wasn’t in school. She missed every single one of her classes. And all that made you think was how thankful you were for the lack of her staring too.

By the time you were done with classes for the day and inside Rafe’s car, you were still in your depressing bubble but more annoyed than anything else. And that is when a call from Patty came in. There was going to be a party tonight.

You're not ashamed to admit you didn’t even think twice before answering her. You wanted to go to that party. And you did.

Not that you remember much from it now that you lay on Rafe’s bed, silently contemplating your life choices, but you like to think that you had fun.

You remember how you got to the party with Rafe, and quickly found Patty, who made sure to give you as many drinks as you wished to have.

Rafe stepped away to find Topper and Kelce only after he made sure that Patty was going to actually stay by your side the whole night and entertain you enough.

You drank cup after cup of different concoctions made by Patty herself. Some were actually good, others… she just told you to drink it all in one gulp.

You were able to disconnect from reality while sitting in that kitchen with her, drinking and listening to her talk you through the process of making another drink. You two talked for a long time, or at least for enough time until the both of you weren’t exactly speaking in obvious and comprehensible sentences but in slurred words filled with giggles.

And you remember that you went off to find Rafe at some point. You remember that he was very much sober at that time. You remember flashes of sitting on that couch with him and his friends. Patty would eventually join you on the couch and start a conversation that would make a lot more sense than any of the guys' around the table. You also remember that it was way funnier at the time than now.

Also, at one point into the night, you decided that playing, or better, patting Rafe’s buzzed head was the best idea you could ever have. Your drunk mind must have been blown to realize how weird it felt to touch his short hair and feel it prickle your palm. Rafe didn’t seem to mind it too much - even though he must have told you to stop at one point because you remember being dramatically hurt by something he said to you.

Maybe you had exaggerated by deciding to numb your thoughts with alcohol when you know that hanging out with these people would simply do the job. You didn’t need to get that drunk. But you still felt like it was the best time to do it, as well as with the best people.

Hanging out with people like Patty and Topper is nice. They were never your type of crowd, but even when drunk or high, last night, they did listen to you when you talked about what happened. It happened when some of you decided to step outside for some air, while others, like Rafe, decided to stay back. You told them everything, and they listened. And they also offered to help, in any way possible.

That memory alone made your heart squeeze in your chest. Maybe, yes, this is how real friends are supposed to be if they are able to. But it still felt good when they told you that if you ever needed to run away from life’s problems for a bit, they would be there for you, along with Rafe.

And to think that conversations like these resulted only from you choosing to date someone with a bad reputation. 

Since the beginning, you had a feeling that you would need to talk to someone about it - you and Rafe. Simply to let them know before they find out from someone else, and everything turns shitty. And, now, all you can do is acknowledge that you missed your opportunity and everything is indeed shitty. 

Your friends found out before you could even warm the waters with some information or subtle hints first. Maybe you could've told them about all the times Rafe hadn’t been like the awful cookie-cutter shape they all seem to find him fitting in at all times. You could’ve told them about how he is not bad and how he is indeed good. But you missed the opportunity to do so. You let them find out by themselves, and now they think you are in bed with a psychopath only for the thrill of it. Not with your boyfriend, who has never done a bad thing to you and is always putting you first.

Yet, even in the ocean of guilt, you can’t help but feel the anger that has begun to rise by itself. Yes, you had missed your opportunity, but your friends had also failed. They failed to speak to you in a civilized way. Failed to be there for you as they believed you were in a manipulating and abusive relationship. Failed to understand you. And failed at being your friends at the end of the day. They didn’t seem to care about your feelings that day, and they didn’t seem to care about anything but their fury toward you this week. They failed, even if you did so too.

And, as much as you hate it, there is still fear inside you. It has been pushed deep into you, hiding in a corner of your brain, stored away with other worries on top of it so it isn’t noticed by you any time soon. And that fear has a shape and name. Your parents. Because if your friends had their suspicions and found the truth, where does that put your parents?

They are a pair that believes in every word from the neighbors, as well as any word on the streets. If someone were to whisper about Rafe murdering a crocodile in the middle of the street, they would believe it - even when there aren’t any crocodiles near any roads in the OBX. They would believe it, every word of it. Maybe make theories of their own too. Imagine Rafe as this cartoonish supervillain, now wearing the skin of his victims as new shoes. It is ridiculous but absolutely believable to them.

How would they react? What would they do to you? You are of age, but still a student and living under their roof. What would they even think of you?

“Scoot over, you’re taking up the whole damn bed,” Rafe says while standing beside his bed.

You snap out of your horrible thoughts - with your mind still trying to envelop your heart with its dark and painful realities - and throw the pillow closest to you at him, hitting him in the chest. He doesn’t respond. He throws the pillow away and makes you move with a hand on your shoulder and another on your leg, pushing you further into the bed.

The coldness of the sheets under you make your body react in an uncomfortable wave of shivers, and you turn to face Rafe, who is lying on his back beside you now. On the bedside beside him, you can see that it is still early in the morning, meaning you still have a few hours before being dropped off at your house and then at school. And also, everyone in Rafe’s home is still very much asleep.

“Looking at the time won’t make it go by faster,” Rafe says, making you look at him.

“I want it to go slower, not faster.”

Rafe meets your gaze, and he holds it for a bit. A slight bit of a headache hits you right in the temple, and you try not to react by snuggling closer to the pillow under your head. Seems like you were never truly someone blessed with no headaches while hungover, just lucky on that one time.

“What’s wrong?”

“Headache.” You groan into the pillow, closing your eyes to escape his gaze for only a bit.

It takes a few seconds before he talks again.

“What else?” His tone is soft and worrisome. When hearing his question, you don’t move; not even an inch. You just lay there for a bit, listening to your own heartbeat with your ear buried in the pillow. You let some heartbeats go by in your silence, but Rafe waits for you. Never pushes you. He just waits.

“I’m… worried, I think.” You whisper so softly, you almost don’t hear yourself.

“About your friends?”

“That too,” You open your eyes as you talk, “But more about my parents.”

“Why?”

“They’re strict. Very strict,” You explain, even though you know that Rafe already knows that, or else he hadn’t been climbing your window and whispering in your room for months. “They always reacted badly to dating. And they never liked you or your family.”

“Many don’t,” he says with a small curve on his lips.

“It’s different,” you try to explain in as few words as you can, “They’re worse than Kristy or any of the girls would be.”

Rafe simply looks at you, silent. You look at him and let out a breath. 

“I don’t know what they’re going to do when they find out...” You tell him, sincerely. “I just want it all to be after graduation.”

He still doesn’t say anything, so, he simply lets you talk.

“I think that’s what I’m so scared of… The fact that I don’t know what to expect from their reaction.” You sigh, “And that is why I wanted it to be later. So I can- I don’t know, run away before they get to do anything.”

“What’s the worst thing they can do?”

“I’m not sure…” You whisper, your eyes meeting his again. “Kick me out, probably. Never speak to me again,” You try to say it with a positive tone, one that doesn’t seem to consider those options to be true, when, in reality, nothing ever felt more possible than this.

Rafe makes a face that doesn’t seem like he’s convinced.

“I can’t be that bad.” And that earns him a smack.

Rafe’s laughter fills the room, and a small involuntary smile appears on your lips.

“Be serious,” You tell him, turning around to lay on your stomach and prop yourself up on your elbows. You groan with the slight headache pounding on your head, and Rafe’s hand soon lays over your head, trying to soothe the pain away.

“I’m sorry,” He says.

“I’ll think about it,” You say while meeting his eyes. Some sort of humor comes out with your words, and Rafe notices it. He grins and simply looks at you for a moment.

You two stay quiet for a little longer before you start letting more words out, explaining your worries to Rafe while he simply listens. He just lays there and nods, giving you his utmost attention.

And, as expected, you two talk for so long that time does the opposite of what you want it to. It just speeds past you two, and everyone in the house begins to get up and get ready for the day. 

While listening to the doors opening and closing around the house, as well as some screaming about breakfast from one floor to the other, you two lay in Rafe’s bed in silence. Rafe’s hand is on your pillow, fallen from your hair, and now under your cheek, softly caressing it with his thumb while you lay there, hugging your pillow with your eyes closed.

Rafe stares at you for a bit. There would be no way of you catching him doing it, with your eyes closed and body ready to go back to sleep. You are laying on his bed, lacking clothes, and with only a soft white duvet over your legs all the way up to your waist. Your back is uncovered, and your hair is a mess, but the scenery is perfect. Rafe’s heart tightens at the memory of the tears you’ve spilled in the last few days. He can’t help but feel guilty over it, even when you remind him that he has nothing to feel guilty about. 

You’ve told him time and time again. Whatever has happened has nothing to do with him. It has to do with control. Control that some of these people want to have over you or have had for so long - even when that control was disguised as love and worry of you ever getting hurt. Truthfully, it would’ve been indeed love if they wished to speak to you calmly and got to know Rafe. But your friends never dared to.

And Rafe knows how much you wish your parents to be different. Even when you teared up while saying it just now, Rafe listened as your tone was thick with hope - the hope of your parents to be on your side when all of it comes out. And still, all he can do is be there for you until all this ends, whenever that will be.

Rafe leans over and pulls you closer to him, which you let him with no hesitation. Your head lays over his shoulder, and your arms go around him. Rafe hugs your body close to him and kisses the top of your head, cherishing the small breath you let out as he does it.

“I love you,” you whisper to him, your breath warm against his skin.

Rafe leans his head in closer to yours and kisses your hair. There is no surprise for either of you to say it. No fear of the love not being reciprocated. No fear of rejection because all of it is obvious, even in the midst of all this mess. Those words were long overdue.

“I love you too,” He whispers, making you lean in closer to his warmth.

- - - - - -

*Giggles in 'shit is about to hit the fan but I am making y'all suffer in anticipation'*

#rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron imagines #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron angst #rafe cameron fluff #tutor #tutor series #drew starkey #rafe cameron obx #rafe cameron outer banks #rafe cameron one shot #rafe cameron s3 #rafe outer banks #rafe x y/n #rafe angst #rafe obx #rafe imagine #rafe x reader

[laaundromat]

Building Love, Steven Grant

Summary: Steven has unconsciously set himself up on a date with his crush.

Literally just a fluffy drabble

He had one single minute of calmness the whole day, when he had just woken up and was still bleary to the world.. from then on, all his composure left him to stumble on his own steps the moment he recalled making plans with you for tonight.

 He felt his teeth clatter in edge every time at the thought of you: with your kind smile and sweet words at him, no matter how many minutes he was rambling at you for. You were striking in an effortless kind of way, a type of simple that warmed his heart, made him feel at peace from all his constant worries. You always succeeded at creating a safe place for him, even unknowingly.

 Today though, no matter how hard he thought back to the way you would caress his forearm whenever he profusely apologized for spiraling through Egyptian trivia, his nerves couldn’t find peace. The matter at hand felt more final than any other meet-up you two had. 

 Before today, it had always been about causally running into each other, to gradually spend more time together by sitting in the nearest bakery or simply walking around with no end in mind. He had grown into his real self around you without even noticing, and, when he did, it had been Marc to point it out. 

(He blushed beet red at the realization, and said nothing to quiet the other two’s snickers).

 And maybe, he reasoned with himself now, he had let himself become too comfortable around you.. ‘cause in no way had he thought he was able to ask you out without pouring his blazing hot coffee onto you, and maybe unconsciously insulting you in the process as well.

 All the way through the morning he had fought with both Jake and Marc, stating not so firmly that it was in no way an actual date, just a more planned meet up than your usual. 

 Though, the pair had very believable arguments and in no time Steven was having a nervous breakdown thinking of all the possible ways he could fuck the date into pieces.

 He thought of cancelling it, of even standing you up, but Jake had him thinking of your sad eyes and wobbling lips if so, and the notion didn’t last long.

 Sure, you knew most of him by now.. you knew his favorite aspects and periods of ancient history; you knew he had trouble sleeping (and not by his own accord of telling you, but by how observant of him you were); you knew how he liked both his tea and coffee; you knew he liked all kinds of plants, but didn’t have the time or patience to keep some in his apartment; you knew he was wary around the topic of family, and you knew he had a special soft spot for his one-finned fish. But the biggest part of him was meant to be kept hidden, and he didn’t know how far he could go with you.

 Marc and Jake weren’t fully on board with his crush on you, thought a relationship would complicate things, what with their personal and “work” situation, though they didn’t find it in themselves to do much more than scolding him the moment he had asked you on tonight’s date. Secretly, you were beginning to grow on them as well, and it was scarier than anything else they experienced in some time, funnily enough. 

(Marc was most wary about Steven’s quick fondness for you, and how he was going to end up brokenhearted, inevitably).

 He got cleaned and dressed ridiculously early, with the nicest black pants the three of them owned, plus a white shirt and black jacket combo. On his way he stopped at a small shop and bought you a heart shaped box of your favorite chocolates, and from then on there was no coming back, and he was really hoping you did think of it as an official date.

 He was purposely ten minutes early, a small tangent of time he could use to calm himself down, but as he rounded the corner he saw you already there, beautiful under a light pole, gnawing at your rosy lips and holding a paper bag in your slightly trembling hands. 

 He had never been so nervously happy to see you. 

You hear his tentative steps when he’s closer, and the way your face brightens at the sight of him makes all three of them melt in the chilly weather.

 “Steven!” You breath out softly, but eager nonetheless, and in no time he has your arms around his chest, heart beating under it.

“ ‘ello, love..”

He had to hold himself back from placing a gentle kiss on your temple when he felt your cheeks puffing up with a smile at his voice.

When you part, his arms are awkwardly stretched in front of you, hands carefully handing you the pink box.

“They’re your favorite.. I thought I’d stop by to get them for you.. there was also a really cute Taweret plushie that I wanted to buy you, but it was kinda big and I didn’t want you to have to bring it everywhere tonight.. would’ve been inconvenient, y’know..”

He’s a rambling mess already and you’ve yet to say more than three words to him, but as Jake was about to soothe him with encouraging words you beat him to it by extending a hand on his forearm, grip tight enough to ground him and a gentle ‘thanks’ right on tow. He decided right then, that it was his favorite gesture to ever receive yet.

Yet in mere seconds, your face was mirroring his from just moments prior, a sheepish glance above red cheeks that you were trying to dissipate in him.

“Yeah I- I got you something, too, actually. But, erm, it’s breezy out here, no? I made a reservation at a place right around the corner. I couldn’t find a wholly vegan restaurant, but I checked the menu for you and there is a big choice, so I hope it’s fine for you. My friend told me it’s good, so I’m relying on her!”

On the way, he walked purposely close enough to touch shoulders with you at every step, a feeble attempt to calm you down from the spiral of word you weren’t in control of.. no matter how endearing it was.

Inside the restaurant, you were sat across from him with fairy lights all around you creating a halo above your head. He realized he was about to fall in love with you, and he didn’t have the energy to find what wrong could come with it.

“Here,” you placed the infamous paper bag in front of him. “I hope you like it.. there’s no return policy for it.”

He chuckled with a shaking head, now almost fully relaxed, “I’m sure I’ll love it, sweetheart.”

(Too caught up with opening the wrap around it, he didn’t notice the way you blushed from the nickname).

Inside, there was a Lego flower bouquet, bright and warm and just so you… but at his slight silence, you launched forward, hands on the table, apologetic in you expressions.

“I thought- with this being a first date I’d bring flowers but I know how you struggle to keep them with your sleep schedule and so I thought it could be something you keep in your apartment instead of real ones.. I’m sorry if it’s childish I-“

He gently, with shaky hands, placed your gift on the table (wrapper folded neatly under it) to slide off the boot and approach you with tentative steps, eyes wide open in wonder.

Marc and Jake were quiet in his head, torn between either take some bricks away from the built up wall, or make it even thicker. To themselves, it was useless to deny the attraction towards you, but they had swore to not let it become anything more. But how could they, when you’re seated there, timid smile and hopeful eyes shot at them, treating their Steven right as he deserves, giving him a reason to gain more confidence in himself.

How could they, when you were melting inside Steven’s thankful hug, and they could feel your slow breathing under their palms.. and for a minute love felt possibile to pursue.

#oscar isaac x reader #steven grant x reader #marc spector x reader #jake lockely x reader #moon knight x reader

[eowyntheavenger]

Hi! I saw your post on telling Americans to vote, and I was wondering what you think of posts from people from other parts of the world who are calling Americans evil for voting for Biden because of his support for Israel. I've seen a few already. They seem to be completely convinced that Americans deliberately voted for Biden specifically to side against Palestine and no other reason, and spread the general (pretty ignorant and hateful) message of "Americans are evil because of the actions of their government and because they collectively refuse to vote for a president who is good and not simply 'the lesser of two evils'". It frustrates me because they seem to think they're experts on US politics, culture, and society and have all the answers, but it also makes me concerned because it reminds me of the whole Russian bot thing from last time. Like, I'm 99% sure the people reblogging these posts aren't Russian bots (don't know about the OPs though), and they unquestioningly believe this. What do you think of this and how would you go about addressing this issue? Do you think it's possible to get them to understand how little they actually know about the US and how they're actually promoting a message that makes things worse for everyone? I've also seen less scathing posts that are just disheartened and don't seem to believe the democrats are truly better to vote for than the republicans and so it's just two sides of the same coin. To be fair, I think that sort of feeling is only further encouraged because there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden, not even back to square one after Trump moved the country so far backwards. I think most Americans really wish the elections actually had good candidates and they could pick the best of two goods, but are frustrated and stuck with the current system and don't know how to actually get to the point where there are good candidates. (Though personally I think voting for the one who isn't actively trying to make themselves a king with unlimited terms is a decent start. I can understand the frustration though.)

Hi! Thanks for the ask. This stuff worries me too. I've gotten comments on my posts like that too, telling me/other Americans that we're evil for voting for Biden.

But I've seen a much larger number of comments and posts from people outside the United States BEGGING us to vote for Biden. I literally get tags like that on my posts EVERY DAY urging Americans to vote blue. So I think that's valuable context, even if it doesn't solve the problem of the "I hate everybody who votes for Biden" crowd.

And yes, it's definitely a shitty argument on their part to claim that people voting for Biden are specifically siding against Palestine. Literally every single person I know in real life and online who plans to vote for Biden has been criticizing and protesting his policies on Palestine.

In terms of convincing the anti-voters that they're wrong, honestly, I don't know. They don't listen to reason and they seem intent on spreading despair. Some of Biden's policies have been terrible (Willow oil-drilling project), some of them have been downright evil (military aid to Israel), but I'm a rational person and I know that Trump is worse in every respect.

I've tried debating them. It's been pointless every time. They genuinely don't know how the government works, which scares me. Common takes include: 1) a genuine lack of awareness of how pro-Israel Trump and the right wing are, combined with magical thinking that a virtually unknown third party candidate can win the presidential election, 2) truly impressive mental gymnastics blaming Biden for the overturn of Roe v. Wade, and 3) continuing the mental gymnastics to blame Biden and the Democrats for anti-trans policies...

I guess my advice is to either ignore them and move on, or debunk things when you have time/energy? It's easier said than done, I know. There's nothing more annoying than someone being stupid on the internet, especially when they accuse you of stuff that just isn't true, and especially when they're spreading dangerous misinformation or voter-suppression rhetoric.

Like you, I'm highly suspicious of anyone who advocates AGAINST voting, or against voting blue. And I agree, many of these people are not bots, like you said, but I call them useful idiots, because they're doing the bots' work for them.

The one thing you said that I'm going to push back on is "there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden." Biden's actually made lots of progress on a variety of issues, and reversed some of Trump’s damage, it just doesn't get a lot of fanfare and it’s unfortunately happening at the same time as Republican gains in state legislatures and while they control the Supreme Court. But Biden and his administration have:

• invested billions in green architecture and clean energy, including making sure federal investments benefit low-income communities

• introduced new fines for companies' methane emissions

• introduced a plan to cut the federal government's greenhouse gas emissions by 65% by 2030 (that includes the military, which is a huge emitter)

• passed a huge bill for improving the country's infrastructure, including bridges, roads, broadband and more

• introduced first-ever national strategy on gender equality and equity and pushed Congress to pass the Equal Rights Amendment

• fought for women's reproductive rights after the overturn of Roe v. Wade

• put more women, people of color, and women of color on the federal bench than any of his predecessors combined

• nominated Kentaji Brown Jackson as the first Black woman to serve on the Supreme Court

• boosted funding to historically Black colleges

• ordered the DOJ to end the use of private prisons by the federal government

• pardoned thousands of people convicted on federal marijuana charges

• created a White House office of gun violence prevention

• passed the Respect for Marriage Act, guaranteeing federal rights and benefits for same-sex couples

• rolled out a series of actions to protect the rights and safety of the LGBTQ+ community, including protecting queer and trans foster youth, improving access to mental health services, and addressing the rise in hate crimes

• challenged discriminatory state bans against gender-affirming care and trans athletes

• called to support trans youth in State of the Union address and restored the White House tradition of recognizing Pride Month

• changed passport rules so that people can obtain a passport with no gender marker

• examined efforts by each federal agency to advance LGBTQ+ rights around the world

• reversed Trump's transgender military ban

• protected the rights of incarcerated trans people

• forgave billions in student debt, repeatedly, and introduced penalties for college programs that trap students in debt

• slashed bank overdraft fees

• expanded guaranteed overtime pay for millions of people

• made union-busting harder

• prevented discriminatory mortgage lending

• made efforts to expand the child tax credit, which could lift hundreds of thousands of children out of poverty

• cracked down on agriculture monopolies to support farmers and small businesses

• made it so the government is going to start taking drug companies' patents away if they don't make affordable drugs

• made over-the-counter birth control pills available for the first time

• lowered the cost of hearing aids and expanded access to them

• spent millions of dollars on students' mental health

• reversed discriminatory healthcare rules

• reinvigorated cancer research

• announced plans to replace all leaded pipes in the next ten years as well as combatting lead exposure abroad

• changed rules for how people can get aid after disasters so they can get more protection and immediate payments more easily

• introduced new data privacy rules protecting people from tech companies

• pushed the federal government to monitor AI risks

• maintained steadfast support for Ukraine in the face of Russian aggression

• maintained steadfast support for Taiwan in the face of Chinese intimidation

• strengthened ties with allies in Asia and the Pacific Islands

• pledged climate change assistance to low-lying Pacific Island countries

• literally IMMEDIATELY after being elected, Biden fortified DACA, rejoined the Paris Agreement, and ended Trump's discriminatory "Muslim ban", ended the Keystone XL Pipeline and fossil duel development in wildlife monuments, (same as last link) rejoined the WHO, strengthened COVID-19 response measures on a variety of fronts, re-included non-citizens in the U.S. census, and passed executives orders on racial equity in the federal government

And I'm sure there's more I left out.

There are also things Biden does that literally don’t make the news, but matter a lot, like funding the Postal Service, and continuing to have a State Department so we can conduct overseas diplomacy (Trump tried to defund the USPS and wants to purge the State Department and fill it with loyalists).

#asks #US politics #Biden administration #I'm planning to make an even more comprehensive post at some point #my post

[petit-etoile]

I just read your story "in the moonlight" and I am absolutely impressed and astonished on how well written it is :DD I wanted to request an astarion/tav fic, with tav being half elf and their relationship having a bit of a rocky start, sort of enemies to friends to lovers sort of thing. The two slowly developing feelings but unsure of what exactly they are. i just love the idea of how different Tav is to Astarion, they're more open to speak how they feel or be more truthful than him, and even though they didn't like each other at first (Tav finding him a bit of a creep after the first bite thing) but their development and getting to understand Astarion, made them slowly develop those feelings. Astarion being conflicted himself, as the two try to make it work despite being opposites, yet able to connect, whether it be playful banter to one another or general teasing. The two are just, almost inseparable.

give me true love & understanding

pairing: astarion/tav wordcount: 4761 content warnings: no in-depth descriptions, but mentions of astarion's life with cazador. could be considered hurt/comfort, but more focused on making emotional connections. no in-depth descriptions, but volo & ethel & omeluum's attempts at curing the parasite are mentioned. other tags: canon compliant, enemies to lovers, developing relationship, love confessions, getting together, astarion is bad at feelings, gender neutral & half-elf!tav archiveofourown: here. tag list: @azrielshadows1nger summary: You and Astarion find yourselves arguing nearly nose to nose in the depths of the Underdark over Barcus Wroot’s request, and while he gets so angry you think he might leave the party for good, he ventures off to hunt instead.

　　　　　𝐈. ﹕previous fic　　　　𝐈𝐈. ﹕next

You and Astarion get off to a bad start.

A terrible start if you’re feeling honest. It’s hard to genuinely forgive someone for holding a knife to your throat before accusing you of working with the creatures who are the reason you’ll turn into monsters, but for the sake of your future and for the sake of a cure, you forgive Astarion because you have to.

You bicker with him unlike anyone else you’ve ever encountered before. Before, you could have counted one hand how many times you’ve had to negotiate with your own nieces and nephews, but now it would take both of your hands and Shadowheart’s hands to count every argument you’ve had with Astarion since meeting him amongst the wreckage.

The night before you’re to venture into the goblin camp to rescue the druid Halsin, the fine lining of your temper has snapped and you and Astarion are standing in the middle of camp shouting at one another while your other companions politely try to look the other way.

With the exception of Lae’zel, almost every single one of them has agreed that finding Halsin is the best plan after Nettie’s botched attempt to help you. The Githyanki Creche is next, but for every day you’ve spent trying to find someone who could cure you of this wretched parasite, all of the signs have ended up pointing to the druid leader.

You thought you could ignore Astarion at first, but he and Lae’zel have been making snide comments all evening, and you’ve had enough. You drop the sword that you’re holding and turn on him, and the rest of whatever you’re saying becomes a blur

‘I didn’t want to help them,’ Astarion reminds you forcefully. ‘I said we should turn around and leave!’

‘We have no choice if we don’t want to turn into mindflayers,’ you snap.

‘Everyone always says oh, don’t worry, there’s another cure out there,’ Astarion mimes in a high pitched voice, hands raised to enunciate his words. ‘We visited the wood’s witch and she had no cure, and we visited the other druid  —  ’

‘And now we’re visiting another druid,’ you say as politely as you can manage, teeth grinding as you try to reign in your anger. ‘One with more experience. One with history in illithid parasites.’

Your voices raise higher and higher as you begin shouting at one another. Astarion offers no other suggestions or ideas to counter your decision, and while you’re desperately trying to be mindful of the fact everyone is afraid about what could happen once your time runs out, you don’t really have time for any of these selfish antics that keep you from remaining a cohesive team. Eventually Wyll steps in to alleviate the situation. It pisses Astarion off more. He marches off to his tent for the rest of the evening to sulk.

But in the morning when everyone is dragging on their armor and making sure their blades are sharpened, you watch as Astarion quietly sorts through his poisons and all of his different knives. When it’s time to begin the infiltration, he says nothing to anyone and does as requested whether it’s opening doors or chests. It’s a bloody, tough, exhausting fight and the only reprieve is the brief, strange laugh he gives after watching you entertain the Priest of Loviatar’s desires. You give him the knife you stole from Abdirak as an apology. Like all things too good to be true, it fixes nothing. You and Astarion find yourselves arguing nearly nose to nose in the depths of the Underdark over Barcus Wroot’s request, and while he gets so angry you think he might leave the party for good, he ventures off to hunt instead.

You aren’t really sure what your relationship with Astarion is. You have given him your blood and your body against all of your instincts telling you not to, and sometimes it almost feels like you’re beginning to see eye-to-eye on topics you would have fought over before. The good moments are almost so sweet they are sour  —  when Astarion reads you excerpts from novels you pick up or you mock an Absolute cultist who had attempted to be all-powerful and intimidating to the point where he’s doubled over in hysterical laughter. Yet, the moments where you argue are so polarizing that it can be hard to tell whether he enjoys your presence or not. It’s hard not to stress about it.

Gale had asked you once during one of your Weave lessons. You had made the prettiest of sparkles in the air and watched as they rained down, and your first thought was not of how incredible the magic was, but if Astarion would delight at the sight if you showed him.

Gale asked, without a hint or a trace of animosity, ‘Why him?’

You replied, ‘I think I’m hoping that it could be enough. If I could show him enough of the good in this world, maybe he would stop being so angry. I think we all deserve happiness.’

Gale hummed and nodded his head. He rubbed his beard for a few minutes before saying, ‘Try this.’ You learned a simple incantation that was just as flashy, but more contained. You learned to make a lotus flower made of stars in your palms, and when you brought it to your nose, it smelled faintly of stardust and divinity. Gale sent you on your way with a proud, if not slightly melancholic, smile.

You don’t even have the time to show Astarion before it all goes to shit. Something like black jealousy has brewed in Astarion’s gaze, and when the smile slowly slides from your lips, it seems as if that makes it worse. Astarion looks away from you sharply and clenches his fists. Like part of him reveled in making you just as angry as he felt. He brings up Philomeen discarding her love as though it were nothing, as if it’s your fault she is a liar.

Astarion broods and lashes out, and with the coldest realization that slides down your spine, you realize it has nothing to do with you or the decisions you’ve made. He’s hurting as if from a broken bone or a broken heart. His mouth is pressed into an angry line. His eyes snap back and forth as if he’s waiting for someone terrible to appear. Astarion is scared, and there’s nothing you can do that can help him. You offered him safety once. He refused.

‘Why are you so mad at me?’ you blurt out.

The question takes Astarion off-guard. His mouth pops open almost audibly, and he furrows his brows in such confusion you’re forced to wonder if he’s even realized he was being cruel to you.

‘Well, I  —  ’ he begins as if to defend himself before sputtering out, ‘It isn’t  —  It isn’t you.’

‘Oh, really?’ you ask, letting a little venom leak into your voice. ‘It isn’t me?’

Astarion scowls. You’ve ruined whatever argument he was trying to make. You expect him to spit out something completely acidic, to take away from what you’ve said, but instead he pivots and begins to stalk towards one of the cliffs underground.

Normally, you would let him go. You would give him time to clear his head while you sorted out your wounded pride. You’ve given him plenty of time to think about what is bothering him and it’s never worked before, so this time you follow.

‘No,’ you insist. ‘You don’t get to walk away.’

‘I want some time to think  —  ’

You grab his wrist as it swings back and cling to him. You feel rather silly about it and he turns around on you with wide, wild eyes. You’re almost entirely sure you’ve made a mistake.

The only thing that you can comprehend is the utter force at which Astarion crushes you against his chest. It’s as if he’s never hugged someone before. It’s uncomfortable and he’s holding you so awkwardly you can’t wrap your arms back around him. It’s like Bernard’s hug all over again. Astarion clings to you so tightly he might as well be cradling you. He pushes his face into your hair while he tries to soothe his own breathing, and you finally manage to pat him sympathetically on his lower back. It’s the only place you can reach.

Faintly, like the touch of a feather, you think he kisses the top of your head.

‘I  —  I’m sorry,’ he says quietly. ‘You’re right. Of course you’re right. You’re you.’

You can feel Astarion’s entire body sag with relief. You’re confused, but this is the kindest he’s been since you stepped into the Underdark, and his arms are intense and strong. I’s more comforting than the first time he grabbed you like this near the nautiloid wreckage. There’s no knife or hollow threats. You turn your head to the side and sniffle.

‘It isn’t you I’m upset with,’ Astarion confesses. ‘Not entirely, you see. I never wanted to say anything  —  You know that more than anyone, how closely I guard my secrets. You have to believe me.’

‘I do,’ you say. ‘All I want is to understand.’

‘For the longest time, I didn’t want to give you the honor of understanding,’ Astarion says. ‘You were chivalric like a storybook hero. The ones who always save the damsels in distress. I hate people like them.’

‘You’re mad because…I’m good?’

Astarion sighs. ‘I’m disappointed, more or less. That all the times I screamed and begged and wished someone would save me, there was no storybook hero listening to me.’

The blood in your veins turns to ice. You hiccup and your face turns hot, and no matter how hard you clench your fists to your side, you can’t stifle the awkward sob that slides right out of your mouth. Astarion only holds you closer. You try to flip it on him so that you’re the one holding him, but he doesn’t let you. At least not yet. You sniffle again, louder this time.

‘I wanted someone to help me the way you helped the tieflings,’ he says, voice strained. ‘I wanted someone to worry for me the way Laridda worried for Philomeen.’

‘I do,’ you say. Your voice sounds small even to you. ‘I worry about you like that.’

Astarion eventually releases you and you both walk further away from your allies as they sort through their gear. You sit a few feet from where you killed the mimcs and stare off into the distance at the strange temple across the chasm.

You bump your knee against his soothingly. All the fighting is a little tiring. Your throat is sore for a number of reasons, and it doesn’t help that it’s so unfortunately hot. You’re so close to the forge that the heat is sapping your energy. Astarion uses his sleeve to dab at the tears on your cheek and you let him wipe at your skin and the dirt on it just so you can feel his touch.

‘I apologize,’ Astarion says, ‘for the way I was behaving.’

‘It’s okay,’ you say. You tap the tip of your boots together. ‘I suppose it makes sense when I think about it.’

Astarion rolls his eyes. ‘Even if it “makes sense,” I was still behaving abhorrently. It was uncalled for.’

‘I get why  —  ’

‘Please, darling,’ Astarion says in a strained voice. ‘Just consider accepting my apology. I do not give them often, you know. You’re the only one I’ll apologize to for being this way.’

You immediately start to go into some grandiose speech about how it’s the power of forgiveness that matters most during times like this, but there’s something sincere about the way Astarion is watching you that makes the words die in the back of your throat. You smooth your chainmail nervously.

There.

A funny little feeling comes again. A silly, fleeting emotion in the bottom of your stomach. It nearly unravels you how warm it is. It spreads throughout your body from your palms to the soles of your feet to the tips of your ears and the roof of your mouth. You turn away from him as if to escape the spell he was casting on you. It doesn’t work.

It was easier to believe it was something else in the beginning. When you were falling into leaves with Astarion leaning over you, or listening to the silky smooth timbre of his voice as he seduced you jokingly. It’s not that much fun anymore now that it works. You wrap your arms around your knees and pull them to your chest. You bite the inside of your cheek. You blink ash out of your eyes.

‘Thank you,’ you say finally. ‘For telling me and for apologizing. We can make this work.’ You reach over and squeeze his knee. ‘Once Nere is dealt with.’

Despite your heart to heart with Astarion, the bickering doesn’t stop although you now understand it comes from a place of fear rather than anger. You nearly lose an eye to Volo’s enthusiasm and inexperience, and Astarion yells at the bard so loudly you almost expect him to leave in the middle of the night. Astarion doesn’t yell at you, but you do keep both eyes open that night. Volo is still there in the morning, perhaps against his better judgment.

Over the course of your exploration of the Rosymorn Monastery, you and Astarion slowly come back together. Astarion lets you hold his hand while you take the lift down to the monastery itself and kneels with you when you have to press yourself against the floor, and he helps lift you off when it’s finished and you’re almost certain your legs have turned to nothing. But Astarion pouts even when you find the room with the kobolds and looks pained when he sees your new eye.

Surely he does forgive you a little. He says nothing when you fall asleep on him later that evening. Gale used the wine from earlier for everything he cooked that evening, and your stomach was so full and warm that you couldn’t help but lean against Astarion after eating. He read a chapter from one of his novels to you to keep you entertained.

You remember everyone was sorting through the goods of the day, and Shadowheart and Lae’zel were antagonizing one another like they normally do, but it was cozy and familiar. It reminded you of when you were still a child living at home with your mother’s family. You fell asleep without intending to. The fact he was there at all, you think, is what made you happy.

You’re coaxed to consciousness by tender stroking around your eye, and when you finally manage to open them despite your grogginess, Astarion is leaning above you and studying your face. He doesn’t hide when you catch him. He looks sad, so impossibly sad, that you think something terrible has happened.

‘Is everyone  —  ’

‘Oh yes,’ he says quietly. ‘The rest of us are all quite fine. Thank you for asking, my dear.’ He frowns. ‘Always so concerned about others, but never really concerned for yourself, are you?’

You furrow your brows. ‘I was a bit drunk,’ you say, trying to make your tone cheerful. ‘I’m okay now!’

‘The hag,’ Astarion complains, ‘messed with your eye. Omeluum nearly killed you, as kind as he was. Volo did butcher you.’ He bites his lip. ‘What will happen when we meet the Githyanki?’

‘They’ll get rid of the parasite,’ you say.

The fight leaves you. You don’t want to argue anymore. You want to sleep and dream and think of what your next step is. Part of you wants to lash out, but there’s something in the way Astarion is looking at you that keeps you from saying something witty and biting. You flush with frustration and sit up immediately, hating that he’s turning potential salvation into an argument a half-day’s walk away from the creche.

Once, Astarion had asked for the tadpoles and you had thrown the few jars you’d collected at him in anger. The next day, they were neatly returned to your bag and no other word was said about it. It’s all so confusing! Does Astarion like you? Does Astarion hate you? For how much longer are you going to desperately seek his approval?

 You press your palm against your eye and try to ignore the wiggling you can feel at the memories. You stand up quickly and stalk off in the same direction you were already looking, careful to not be too loud as you pass the tents of your sleeping companions. All you want is to clear your mind and go back to sleep without any fuss. Without any arguing.

Like you had done before in the Underdark, Astarion follows you on your walk without saying anything. You aren’t sure why you let him come without a fight, but you don’t want to snap at him to leave in case it makes matters worse. All you do is lean against the first tree that you can find, and hope and pray and wish that your wine-induced headache goes away before the yelling begins.

‘What do you want?’ you sigh.

‘You said,’ Astarion begins, ‘that we would make this work. I’m trying to be more…open with you about how I feel, but every time I try, you get mad at me.’

‘What would you have me do instead?’ you ask. ‘I’m trying to do what I think is right. To do what is expected of me. To try to keep everyone happy.’

‘Sometimes,’ he says exasperatedly, ‘I’m expecting you to be scared shitless.’

‘I don’t get to be scared shitless!’ you whine. ‘Everyone has made me a leader. I never wanted to be the leader of anything!’

‘Then don’t,’ Astarion says. ‘Let someone else do the dirty work for you.’

‘Lae’zel will be beyond furious if we don’t visit the creche,’ you argue.

‘Let her go and deal with her brethren on her own!’ Astarion says with a shrug. ‘Or assign her Shadowheart and Halsin. It’ll go pleasantly. You and I already know it won't work.’

‘We don’t, not for certain,’ you say vehemently. You dig your fingers into the bark. ‘What if it works? They’ll get the cure and we’ll get nothing.’

‘Halsin seems sure that it won’t,’ he counters. ‘Our best interest is to seek information at the Moonrise Towers where all the other tadpole bastards are gathering.’

‘What if it does work?’ you insist. ‘What if we visit this healer and they are able to remove the parasite? It spares us from having to venture into the Shadow-Cursed Lands at all. We wound’t have to face the curse Halsin spoke of. Don’t you want that?’

‘Yes,’ Astarion says as if it’s simple.

You turn and frown at him. He’s standing a little ways away from you with his arms crossed, his eyes trained on the moon overhead, his chin tilted in consideration. You slide down the tree with a groan and put your head in your hands.

‘But I know you,’ Astarion says almost sadly. ‘Even if we’re cured by the Githyanki, you’ll want to go to where the curse is thickest to help Halsin lift the shadows. You never stop at the easy decisions.’

You open your mouth to argue. There is a small, sinking feeling right in the center of your chest. Astarion is calling you out directly for it rather than getting mad and letting it slide. You’d be thankful if it weren’t for the way it felt like a punch to the gut. Astarion walks over to you carefully and joins you in the dirt, his legs on either side of yours. He watches as you wrestle with your feelings. Without saying anything, he touches your calf and squeezes it comfortingly.

‘I don’t want everyone to hate me,’ you say, your voice thick with tears. ‘I want to do what’s best. That’s why I try so hard. If there’s even a chance this is what’s best for us, then  —  ’

‘You are what’s best,’ Astarion interrupts.

‘You don’t understand!’

‘I could,’ he says, smoothing his hand against your leg. ‘If you would let me.’

So you explain it: You’ve never felt like you had a family. Your father was a high-elf who sired a babe on your human mother. It was never supposed to happen, and they had never intended to get together because of it. Your mother had loved you, but no one other family on her side seemed to care much for a child born out of wedlock. You spent holidays sitting away from your cousins, and when you set out to find your father, the mindflayers had swept you up. You never stood a chance.

You hated to admit it, but this was your family now. Shadowheart and her strange darkness, Lae’zel and her anger to cover up her fear, Karlach and her wonderful laughter and ambition, Wyll and his drive and focus, Gale and his knowledge and inspiration, Astarion and  —  Admitting it makes your throat close up, but the hand on your leg won’t stop the melodic, soothing rubbing. You force yourself to admit that you love him. You don’t say love to him directly, but it’s obvious.

Astarion listens, humming and nodding when necessary, and his hand never leaves your leg. You can feel the warmth of his palm through your sleep pants, and it makes you miss him even though he’s sitting right there. You lean forward and he leans with you until your foreheads are nestled together. You close your eyes and feel as he nuzzles his nose against yours as gentle as he can be.

It’s unlike him.

For someone who is always on the move, desperate to do the next thing, Astarion treats you carefully. You soften into the touch.

‘We are your family now,’ Astarion murmurs. ‘Let us take some of the weight for you. You might be surprised to learn you needn’t bear this cross alone. Our lives aren’t worth the cost of yours.’

You swallow your instinct to disagree, and nod, feeling his forehead scrunch against yours. ‘Alright,’ you say. It’s the only thing you can manage without crying.

‘Alright,’ he agrees, nodding with you because it’s silly to do. ‘We’ll make this work.’ ‘Do you…have a moment?’ Astarion asks you one evening. ‘I  —  I think we need to talk.’

You don’t know if it’s the impending sense of doom that has swept you both up or if you’re hoping for a moment of reprieve from the back to back onslaught, but you walk with Astarion. You try not to think too hard about his quiet tone. You can’t go very far like you normally do, not wanting to explain why you need to borrow a Moon Lantern, but you find a little alcove to sit in far enough away that the other companions’ conversations have quieted to nothing but a dull hum. There’s still light from the torches Wyll had helped Lae’zel set up around camp earlier.

Astarion sits a bit away from you and angles his body to face the gloom in the distance. There’s sorrow in the slump of his shoulders. In the dark circles under his eyes. He is making himself small, you realize, in case you decide to get angry. Your mouth goes dry.

It’s going to be another fight, isn’t it?

Except where all other fights led to a deeper understanding, this will be the fight that causes Astarion to leave. Your stomach rolls uncomfortably. You stare at your hands and try to imagine how his fingers felt when they slid against yours. A part of you begins demanding that you start begging to make amends, as if you can stop whatever Astarion is longing to say before he says it. You chew the skin of your lips to keep from saying anything aloud before Astarion has opened up about what’s bothering him.

You’re certain you’re going to be sick.

‘Are you…alright?’ you ask. Even to you, your voice sounds miles away. ‘You’re not hurt, are you? From the fight with Marcus?’

‘It’s nothing like that,’ Astarion says thickly. ‘I’m fine. It’s just, I haven’t felt this awful in ages.’ He drags in a deep breath. ‘But you’re always so honest, and you deserve that same kind of honesty.’

‘Have I done something wrong?’ you ask smally.

‘It’s nothing you’ve done,’ Astarion assures you. ‘I’m sure you’ve heard it before. The old, it’s not you, it’s me but this time, it actually is…me.’

You shake your head. ‘You haven’t done anything wrong.’

‘When we met, I had a plan,’ he confesses. ‘A nice, simple plan  —  I would seduce you, sleep with you, manipulate your feelings so I would never be betrayed. It was instinctive. I was playing a part, but the more time I spent with you, the worse I felt.’

His breathing labors as he continues, and with dread, you realize that he would be weeping if he wasn’t trying so damn hard to be strong for you. It hurts your feelings to hear your fears come out of his mouth. You steel yourself so that you can listen to him finish, but in the back of your mind, you’re already thinking about what it will be like when Astarion has left empty spaces in your life. You turn to face him. He’s unable to look at you just yet, but you watch as his jaw works and he tries his hardest to finish what he’s saying without giving up and stopping.

‘It was a habit from two hundred years of doing it for him,’ he spits. ‘All you had to do was fall for it, but you didn’t, not exactly. You didn’t trust me and that was very fair of you. I wouldn’t have  —  even now, I would have never trusted myself if I were someone else.’

‘You did try to eat me,’ you say, trying to joke.

‘I wasn’t going to eat you,’ Astarion says despairingly. ‘Well, I suppose in some ways I have cannibalized you. You cared, so I started to care. You wept, so I wept. You wanted to save the world in a grand sweeping gesture of familial declaration and…I wanted to, too. With you. My plan changed. I wanted to become someone worthy of, well, you.’

‘To be a storybook hero,’ you whisper.

He laughs faintly. ‘When you talked about wanting a family, I thought about how Cazador gave me a one and how I tried to protect them but it was never good enough. He still hurt them when they were bad, when I couldn’t protect them. But now I have a real family, a family that would protect me too. I don’t want to lose them. I don’t want to lose you. I want to protect you and be protected in return.’ He looks at you, eyes brimming with tears.

‘You’re incredible,’ Astarion confesses, shaking his head. ‘You deserve so much better than I, but the thought of you with someone else fills me with such jealousy I can hardly stand it. I want us to be something real.’

You choke on the quietest of sobs, and Astarion reaches to take your hands into his. He doesn’t mean to, but his grip is so tight on your hands that if you try to pull them away, you think he’d topple over with you. You cling back to him. You’ll fall into eternity if you let go. He catches you as best he can.

‘I care about you,’ you say. ‘I knew it even when I didn’t want to admit it. When Gandrel found us, the night I was certain I was turning into a mindflayer  —  It doesn’t matter to me, Astarion. Why you did it. I will never understand the depth of what has happened to you  —  but I can keep it from happening again.’

‘I laughed at you the first time you suggested it.’

‘I deserved it,’ you say, ‘but I know I can do it now.’

Astarion swallows thickly. ‘I expected us to fight again. You’d be well within your right to be horrible.’

‘It hurts,’ you admit. He closes his eyes at the confession, but you squeeze his hands. ‘But it doesn’t change anything, Astarion. I would have loved you until the world ended.’

‘Luckily for you,’ Astarion says with a small laugh. ‘I know you would never let the world end.’

#astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #astarion x tav #astarion x reader #astarion x oc #from ，carcosa . #my fic #pandimoostuff #*hides my face in my hands* UHH I HOPE YOU LIKE IT

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not wanting my fiancé to hang out with my sister and I?

Okay so my fiancé (22f) offered to drive to Mexico with her aunt and stay a couple days. It was only three days notice and she hadn't discussed it with me(24f) at all. I do think she should go, she's been wanting a vacation lately and been really upset because I can't afford to go anywhere. It's a good opportunity to get vacation and family time. I was really happy for her. I just feel like it's basic politeness to at least let me know before she gave a definitive yes since we live together so I was slightly annoyed.

Fast forward two days and it seemed like that plan wasn't going to work out because her aunt wanted to postpone, so instead she decided to go out of town with her brother (18) since she had gotten her hopes up about a vacation, which again sounded like a good idea. In the meantime I'd set up a sleepover with my sister that same weekend.

Without even mentioning the situation to me, my fiancé posted on snapchat asking if a third person wanted to go with them to keep the costs down, which would be fine if she hadn't posted it to her story. Its okay if someone else goes but maybe asking in a groupchat or a few people individually but not absolutely everyone.

So of course her ex (who she has readily admitted shes left multiple people for) asked to go. It isn't her fault that her ex is the only one who offered but also that's part of the reason why I would have asked her to ask more directly than every single person she has on snapchat.

She asked me if I was comfortable with that which was nice, and I said not really because of the nature of their relationship. The only times we've hung out, my fiancé ended up being super cold and hostile to me and laughing her ass off at inside jokes with her. I get that they have a history and I don't expect her to pretend they dont, but it just makes me uncomfortable when we're all together because I feel like a third wheel to the person I'm engaged to and her ex girlfriend.

She got upset and said I was being unfair and ruining her weekend. I told her it was fine if she could find literally anyone else and that frankly it was inappropriate for her ex to even ask. She got argumentative about how she's been hanging out with her ex for years because they have mutual friends (which is fair except the mutual friends are not invited) and that her ex didnt even know I wouldnt be there. The argument lasted another two days. She kept saying that I am being too controlling, which I dont think is fair because if she didnt care about my feelings then why ask about them. I just gave up and said it was fine. I'd be having fun with my sister anyway so I wouldn't spend the whole time worrying, and I trust her not to cheat on me I just think it's a weird situation and it makes me uncomfortable, which is what she asked.

As soon as I said yes she told me it was too late to book an airbnb so she wasn't going to go, and that really upset me because she'd been so angry about me being uncomfortable that she wouldn't leave me alone for days and what was even the point of all that if she wasn't going to go anyway and she already decided that.

During the past 4 days until canceling suddenly like that, she was 100% supposed to be going out of town to somewhere, and I had gotten really excited about my sleepover with my sister. We were going to do things that my fiancé does not enjoy (arts and crafts, watching period movies) since it would be just us and also have some much needed sister time.

All of a sudden, the next day, my fiancé asked if she could come over too since she wasn't going anywhere. I said "I guess, but we were going to do stuff that you wouldn't like." And she got mad and told me I was being super rude and I could have been nice about it, which I thought I had been and I told her I feel like if she came either she wouldn't have fun or we wouldn't get to do the stuff that we were planning to. She was still angry all night and kept saying she obviously didn't want to come now since she wasn't welcome. I barely slept because she was so clearly upset with me and I didn't see any way to fix things without ruining my night with my sister.

The day before the sleepover she kept hinting that she wanted me to invite her and I really didn't want to. Maybe before all this stuff but I am really annoyed with all of this and I don't want he to butt in on my sisters night.

I think she's been inconsiderate and mean to me over this whole thing. I just don't get her thought process with any of it. But she seems really sad and that does make me think maybe I'm being the asshole here.

So AITA for not wanting my fiancé to hang out with my sister and I?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[hollowwrites]

How Charming

Ominis x MC

Summary - I want more interaction between Ominis and MC damn it!! This has made me want to rewrite the Hogsmeade quest to which I’m already doing for Garreth so…throw Ominis in there too. Let Ominis get slapped around by a troll.

This is just pure Ominis in denial. I like to think the reason he’s distant is because he doesn’t know how to feel towards MC.

And I have plans to rewrite the Undercroft argument too so that’ll be fun.

Warnings: None just a rewrite, feel free to change Evelyn to MC or Y/N

Word Count - 1604

~

“Time for a proper Hogwarts Welcome”

Oh for heavens sake

Ominis heard the low chuckle from Sebastian as he took up his duelling position against the new girl.

He’d heard him sound like that before. He spoke to Imelda like it sometimes when he was feeling brave and every single time, Ominis cringed.

Usually, he didn’t care. The thought that perhaps he’d have been better off born deaf instead of blind passed through his mind but other than that, it’s just Sebastian being his usual irritatingly charming self.

But something about this duel made Ominis’ teeth itch.

The sounds of exertion from the two of them helped Ominis keep track of what was happening. His wand alerted him to their basics movements across the raised plinth. She was graceful. And deliberate. Impressive considering she’s never been around magic.

He listened to her cast Levioso confidently and accurate, not ten minutes after she had learned the spell even existed.

Remarkable.

“Good Form” Sebastian purred, and Ominis rolled his eyes.

Even in the middle of a duel.

“I know” she retorted, cockily and he heard Sebastian gasp at her brash behaviour.

Not nice is it, Sebastian

Ominis found himself rooting for her. He heard her effortlessly lift Sebastian off the ground for the fifth time, followed by a thud and the sound of air being forced from Sebastian’s lungs. Ominis chuckled.

Sebastian walked back over to Ominis with his tail between his legs.

“Did you see that?” Sebastian asked in a hushed voice as they stood at the back of the class

“Surprisingly Sebastian, I did not” Ominis waved a hand in front of his face. Merlin, how does your best friend forget you’re blind?

“You know what I mean! That was definitely not her first duel…” Sebastian spat as he stared daggers towards Evelyn “…and I thought she was so sweet in the Common Room”

“She is” Ominis answered far too quickly. He could feel Sebastian smirking beside him, but decided to ignore it “She survived a dragon attack on her way here, she must know something even if it’s just the basics”

Sebastian mumbled next to Ominis about how it would take more than basics to best him and how he almost certainly held back so as not to crush her spirit.

Ominis didn’t listen.

~

“If you want to get the most out of your time at Hogwarts you’re going to need to break the rules now and then” Sebastian had pulled Evelyn aside at the end of class to discuss something with her. She listen intently as he playfully jabbed at her abilities. “Whether it joining a secret duelling club or sneaking into The Restricted Section of the Library-“ he looked at her with a smug smile and a glint of mischief in his eye. “You just have to be clever enough not to get caught”

“And you’re clever enough?” She looked him up and down with an eyebrow raised “Thank you Sebastian I’ll keep that in mind”

“Good, I-“ Sebastian started before she spied Ominis leaving the classroom

“Sorry Sebastian, have to go. See you later” She bounced happily away towards the door.

“Look for Lucan Brattleby near the Clock Tower Entrance” Sebastian called to her as she waved back at him.

What was that about?

~

“Ominis!” Evelyn called out past the little sea of students filing out of the classroom. He stopped and turned towards her voice.

“Evelyn? Am I remembering correctly?” he asked as she skipped up to him.

“Yes, I was wondering if I could take you up on that offer of showing me around the castle. This charm doesn’t work as well as Fig thinks” she stared down at the field guide in her hands and watched as the tiny golden spark bounced from her pages and behind her, leading her back into The DADA Classroom.

“Of course. The lesson being cut short leaves me with some time before Charms”

“Oh you have Charms too? Ah, how charming……oh I understand Sebastian’s joke now!” She felt stupid as she recalled her earlier conversation in the Common Room. Ominis chuckled. He had a pompous laugh but it was sweet and endearing in its own way. She found herself smiling up at him as he laughed at her.

“I do” he smiled and took a step to the side gesturing for her to walk along side him. “Follow me”

“So…As you know, I am unfamiliar with a lot of the things in this world” Ominis could hear her fumbling with the cuffs of her robes as they walked together “Charms, Spells, Dragons…I don’t know what is normal and what isn’t…”

Where is she going with this?

“…And in the muggle world…” she said the word as though she was trying it on for the first time “…there are people whose eyes glaze over when they’re blind for a while so I guess I was-“

“Are you trying to ask me if I’m blind?” He says, his voice heavy with amusement

“Yes…in as tactful way as I possibly can” he could feel the awkward way she was walking and it made him chuckle.

“Yes I am blind” He tries to hold his tongue from making a smarmy remark. After all, she was trying so hard not to be rude about it, even though he knows it is obvious he is blind….But she’s right. Maybe these eyes were commonplace in the Wizarding World…they aren’t but she isn’t to know that “My wand helps me navigate around the castle”

“Fascinating” She says peeking at his wand. She had wandered why he took it out when they started walking. After all he was perfectly content in the Common Room. No wand in sight…She leaned in towards the blinking tip of the wand and he flinched “Oh I’m sorry…”

“Don’t worry.” Ominis could feel his face getting warm. The heat rising from his collar caused him to rub the back of his neck, willing the encroaching blush away. “Consider my wand an extension of myself. You just leant…very close to me.” He laughed again “It just startled me is all”

“I’m so sorry”

“Honestly, it’s okay. I’m just not used to people being so near to me”

Why is it so hot in here?

“Oh you’re going to just hate me then. I quite like being close to the people I like…” she gasped “Not like, but you’ve been kind to me so…”

He tried to listen to her babble on. It was endearing. But his mind kept wandering to the increasingly loud voices behind them.

“Look at them sauntering around like the King and Queen of Slytherin!”

“As if she didn’t have enough attention she’s leeching off of Gaunt now”

“Did you see her in Defence Against the Dark Arts? Thinks she’s all that cause Sallow went easy on her”

“Ominis?” Evelyns voice bought him back

“Hmm? I’m sorry I…couldn’t help but overhear some of the students they’re…perhaps it best I not say”

“Talking about me? I’m sort of used to it now. It’s all I could hear in the Common Room” her voice sounded so defeated. Her sadness hit him like a tidal wave.

“You shouldn’t be used to it” he put his hand on her shoulder, bringing them to a stop just outside the Charms classroom. His eyes were sympathetic as he stared down at her.

“Ah there you two are? You look like a right pair”Sebastian said, his voice appearing out of nowhere as he was lost in Evelyns turmoil. Ominis knows him well enough to hear the slight tint of jealousy in his voice.

“How so?” Ominis said his cheeks burning yet again.

This is abnormally warm weather for this time of year

“You’re both have an air of... austerity. No offence, Evelyn, but you did scare me in the Common Room earlier. Your face looked like thunder”

She giggled and Ominis twitched. His face twisted up into a stern frown as he gazed in Sebastians direction.

“You know, if you needed guidance to your next lesson you could have asked me. I know we’ve just had…a rather exhilarating fight but…I won’t hold it against you”

She was giggling again.

“Well Ominis had already offered to show me around earlier” she said and he felt her gravitate slightly towards him. His steely expression calmed to a coy smile.

“Did he now?” Sebastian said. “Well I shall extend you the same offer then. Speaking of, Professor Weasley has asked me to accompany you to Hogsmeade later.”

“Oh…that’s kind of you. She did mention about going with someone, I was going to ask-“

“Excellent. We’ll head out after class. Maybe some time in the afternoon?”

~

The students all filed into the classroom when Professor Ronen showed. As they took their seats, Evelyn was called away, leaving Ominis a short period of time to chastise Sebastian before class started.

“What are you doing?!” Ominis spat

“I can assure you I have no idea what you’re talking about” Sebastian said honestly.

“You…ugh…” Ominis realised at this point he was overreacting, but he’d already started his tirade. He couldn’t exactly explain why he was angry. Just that the moment Sebastian turned up, his mood had changed. “Smart little remarks in the duel, offering to show her around the Castle AND to Hogsmeade”

“I’m just being friendly” He said, sounding distinctly pleased with himself

“You know exactly what you’re doing”

“Why does it matter? I- Merlin’s Beard! Are you jealous?”

“Don’t be ridiculous” Ominis snapped, that blush rising from his collar again

“Godrics heart…I have never seen you jealous before”

“I am not jealous”

Oh gods, What if I am?

Masterlist

#hogwarts legacy #hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #hogwarts headcanon #hogwarts houses #hogwarts oc #slytherin #hogwarts legacy ominis #ominis gaunt #sebastian sallow #hogwarts #hogwarts fanfiction #hogwarts mc #harry potter hogwarts game #hogwarts legacy #hogwarts sebastian #hogwarts ominis #hogwarts legacy sebastian #ominis x reader #ominis x oc #ominis x y/n #ominis x mc #ominis x you #ominis fluff #ominis hc #ominis imagine #ominis my beloved #fanfic #fanfiction #ominis fanfic

[mishapen-dear]

thinking about the elections tonight... bad, cellbit, baghera, and forever are four candidates who are devoted to the island- more specifically, to the residents of the island. They care for the eggs, and they care for each other, and the way they exhibit that care through their primary presidential strategies is fucking fascinating.

Bad is who I watch the most, so I know him best. He's a classic mother hen. He doesn't like to take risks with the eggs, and he likes to prepare. If there's any sort of variable that could hurt an egg then he wants to control it. They have a stable relationship with the federation right now- it's not great, but they know the parameters. Don't trust cucurucho. don't follow cucurucho. send the eggs to NINHO every time there's a threat. the time of day changing means you need to run. Other than that they're p okay and roughly safe. But adding a president could potentially change everything. What if the president makes a rule that makes it easier to kill the eggs? And what about the way a president could cause tensions between the players to rise even higher? The dynamics of the island could change drastically. It's safer to neutralize that threat before it ever becomes a threat. It's easier to stop a war before it can start.

Baghera's primary concern is the way the election is designed to pit the residents against each other. All of them know that the Federation is a threat and she, like Bad, is focused on not letting them hurt more people. But, unlike Bad, she's less resistant to change. If the power is spread to multiple players rather than just one, it will be harder for the Federation to corrupt any one of them. Each time before the Federation has gotten to someone it's done so by isolating them. Felps, Cellbit, Jaiden- they've all spent a lot of alone time with Cucurucho. A council isn't just to consolidate the ideals of the island; a council would protect the players themselves. Sure, there might be disagreements and arguments, but they've had those before (and they're having them now!) and there's no reason to think they wouldn't be able to get through them again.

I hit a bit of a wall with Forever and Cellbit's pov here. Everything I know about their plans are from the debates and paraphrased discussions that have been translated here on tumblr, I'm going to talk less about their explicit plan and more about what the result will entail- a single president who takes responsibility for the island. It seems to me like they've recognized the presidential seat as the powerful opportunity that it is, and they want to take advantage of it. Here's some extra personal speculation but, adding rules, adding or removing mods, proposing public works, enforcing laws- those are just the abilities that are listed. Those are incredible opportunities to make the Federation take action, which is more than they've had before. We've seen before that the Federation isn't perfect; the Federation makes mistakes.

By working with the Federation, by making them take action (in a semi-controlled, semi-predictable way) you open them up to more opportunities for them to fuck up (while benefiting you). And, maybe, one of those fuck ups will be the key to taking them down. Maybe they could reopen ender chests. Maybe they could open the nether. Maybe they could learn why the Federation is holding an election in the first place. It's possible to do all these things with Baghera's plan, sure, but that's not a guarantee and, if someone like Bad is on the council, there's absolutely no way to be sure it would get done. And, if there's a council, then that opens up everyone on the council to the Federation's wiles. If there's just one president, then that's where the Federation's focus will be. By using a single person to build a relationship with the Federation, they only risk that single person. By electing ministers instead of a council, they can ensure that the island residents' needs are being heard while placing the federation's focus on that one person. A point can be made that they've done that before- with varying results. like kidnapping. selling your soul. etc. But! overall, I think they've gained more than they've lost by singling out one person. Because of them, we know that Cucurucho can't be trusted. We know that the Federation has a series of tunnels underneath the island. We know that the Federation not only has some sort of cryo technology, but had some unknown reason to use it. We know that there was another person working with Cellbit to take care of Felps (theorized to be ElQuackity), so we know there's at least one more Fed that isn't Cucurucho + blank-faced workers. There's been risk, but there's absolutely been rewards. This is just a very long meandering way to say that their plan to sacrifice Forever to the presidential seat reminds me very much of Cellbit's plan to sacrifice himself to the federation. They're saving their friends by potentially damning themselves and I, for one, think that is cool as hell.

they all care about each other so much. bad's plan means taking on no more risk. baghera's plan means spreading that risk evenly to stand strong together. and cellbit and forever's plan means taking the risk onto themselves so they can reap the rewards for others. am i reading too much into things? no this is tumblr and this smp is about LOVE and i really genuinely think that their election plans are a fantastic example of just how much they love each other

#qsmp elections #qsmp #qsmp analysis #again i haven't been following cellbit and forever's exact plan too closely but i've gotten the sense that their pushing of public works is #just to get people to vote for them and the true reason they want forever to be president is to infiltrate the federation #if that's not it tho feel free to let me know i'd love to know these cubitos reasonings #but with my interpretation i like the silly little extra headcanon of mr cell “sold his soul to the cops” bit #subconsciously sacrificing forever to the feds and pushing him into corruption #which ALSO makes the forever-killing-cellbit-to-kick-him-out-of-the-running plan Even More Tasty #'what if i let you kill me. what if destroying me destroyed yourself. what if i have already destroyed you on purpose and you forgave me #now what if i dont mean it when i do it again' #if anyone wants to examine the other candidates (or these same ones) and figure out how their election strategy is an example of their love #please do #i don't know enoguh about the others #but i know that gegg is love-turned-grief burn-the-world-down #and foolish is love for Item. love for cloud. love for being a silly #i don't know etoiles' plan for if he gets elected but i know he also deeply loves the island and the residents #him and his security <3 and the care packages for new players <3 and the way he Craves Violence but absolutely refuses to hurt anyone who #doesn't deserve it. most guy of all time #personally i want foolish to win because i think it would be really fun #but i think that any of them (even the candidates i don't know) would be a Fantastic president #we're going to get some good roleplay any way it goes so ill be happy :3 #the only mechanic thing i want is for them to open the nether but that feels like a given for anyone so im not worried about it tbh #ty for coming to my tedtalk #hello if you're reading this tag. i see youre just as un-normal about these characters as i am. or you just like to read. respect either wa

[kwanzaa-wakanda]

Why you don't know anyone who celebrates Kwanzaa

"Because no one cares"

"Because it's a sham holiday made by a con artist"

"Because it's dumb"

"Because no True African would ever celebrate Kwanzaa."

These are all bad faith arguments. They aren't meant to actually explain why, and do more to devalue the holiday as well as people who celebrate it or at least respect it.

So, why don't you know people who celebrate Kwanzaa? After all, you have so many Black friends, or maybe even you are Black yourself, shouldn't Kwanzaa be everywhere?

This post is a bit long, and some points are explored more deeper than others, but I think this will provide an explanation that's actually pretty fair and common sense. The short version:

Kwanzaa is a newer, anti-consumerist holiday that does not appeal to every single Black person. And that's okay!

1. Kwanzaa is a newer holiday.

Kwanzaa is only about 60 years old. It's not going to be as popular as Christmas. Other holidays, say Veteran's Day, Memorial Day, or Martin Luther King Jr. Day are about as old or even younger than Kwanzaa, so why are they celebrated more widely? Well, it helps that they're all federal holidays with a state structure to back them up. Individual people can celebrate those holidays, but they don't have to, institutions celebrate them for us by giving us time off work and making a public statement (maybe a donation or two). Other than that, those holidays are largely upheld by community events, just like Kwanzaa (more on this later).

The types of family traditions we associate with Christmas take generations to build. Even other older holidays like Mother's Day don't have any real traditions inherently associated with them--we all give our moms a gift but beyond that, everyone engages with it differently.

New holidays need time to catch on. Institutional structures help speed that process along, but Kwanzaa doesn't really have that. So it's going to be slower than others in terms of attracting people.

2. Kwanzaa is anti-consumerist inherently.

In America, consumerism makes up a very large part of how people engage in holidays. Note that I'm not saying "people only celebrate other holidays for consumerist reasons", I am saying that a lot of the driving forces that 'remind' us to take holidays seriously in the US are market forces. We're inundated with advertisements, sales, and decorations that help create a 'feeling' of the holiday (be it Christmas, Valentine's Day, Halloween, etc) which also make it easier to engage with the holiday. We can get the supplies we need at the store. If we don't have plans then there's probably a business throwing a party around that time to keep us entertained. Gift-giving and feast preparation is expressed through buying products en masse so we prepare financially. Holiday specific media sculpts our collective understanding of the holiday's themes even if we don't engage directly.

Kwanzaa, as an explicitlyanti-consumerist holiday, doesn't lend itself to that level of cultural zeitgeist in the US. People exchange gifts and decorate places for Kwanzaa, but commerce during Kwanzaa is typically kept within Black communities through dealing directly with (small) Black Owned businesses. Given that most corporations in the US are white owned, there's very little reason for the market structure to incentive our continued engagement in Kwanzaa. The passive acknowledgement that it's a holiday that exists is the most we can really hope for.

Imagine Halloween without candy sales, Spirit Halloween stores, Halloween parties or costume nights at our favorite restaurants and bars. Imagine no horror movies coming out in October! In a world like that, I and many other people would still celebrate Halloween, but it wouldn't be as easy, and a lot of people probably wouldn't acknowledge it at all, because it isn't as easy.

Kwanzaa explicitly resists the market forces that help holidays stay in our daily lives. We all value our holidays beyond those forces, but we can't deny the very heavy role they play. We can argue that such market forces are morally neutral or even good, but not in this post--whatever your view of holiday consumerism, it's critical to understand that Kwanzaa was organized specifically for people who don't appreciate such consumerism.

3. Kwanzaa does not appeal to all Black people equally.

I think this is one of the hardest points for people both within and outside the community to grasp. The holiday is for Black people, and is meant to appeal to as broad a sampling of Black people as possible. That doesn't mean it will appeal to everyone, though.

The target audience for Kwanzaa is Black people, regardless of nationality, who believe in a shared political unity, heritage, and cultural engagement of all Black people regardless of nationality.

Thing is, not all Black people believe in or value those things. Not all Black people are Pan-Africanist, Afrocentrist, or Black Nationalist, or any other Negritude philosophy. These philosophies are widespread in politics and scholarship, but outside of those dimensions of life engagement with them gets complicated.

You may have heard that "no Africans celebrate Kwanzaa" this is largely true because Africans live in families and communities where their African heritage is already affirmed through other means, including other holidays. Kwanzaa therefore doesn't appeal to them, even if they do believe in all it's themes. Such people may go to Kwanzaa events if invited, but they likely wouldn't hold them for themselves.

Many in the African Diaspora understand their identity most immediately by the region they settled in, and only have a distant sense of African identity. They don't deny being African or having African heritage, but they see being Caribbean, or Brazilian, or American as more relevant. Kwanzaa therefore doesn't appeal to them as it's not specific enough.

Kwanzaa is not closed to any Black demographic and actively encourages all of us to celebrate it. But not all of us will find it appealing.

I would compare Kwanzaa to a holiday like Easter--its a Christian holiday meant to appeal to all Christians equally. But if you aren't church-going and have no children in the family, you probably don't celebrate Easter to any meaningful extent, or your engagement is so personal that it isn't considered very mainstream or traditional.

The point I'm trying to make is: holidays aren't guaranteed to appeal to everyone in their target demographic. Though the reasons why diverge, not every Christian celebrates Easter, not every Black person celebrates Kwanzaa.

4. Communal Kwanzaa celebration is more popular than in-home, but that also carries some drawbacks to it.

Whenever people interested in celebrating Kwanzaa ask me how to get started, I often tell them to look into community celebrations. They're usually put on by churches (perhaps even mosques), community centers, cultural activity groups, or political groups. And therein lies the problem--if you don't live in close proximity to that type of Black community, or the community is invisiblized, then even if there are communal Kwanzaa celebrations to check out you probably won't know about them.

You can't just ask a random Black person about a Kwanzaa event, typically. My advice is to tell people to check out a Black bookstore (and, if available, an African cultural store or an Afro spiritual store). The types of people organizing Kwanzaa events are usually those deeply enmeshed in cultural and political Black discourses, particularly those that affirm an African heritage. But such people aren't found everywhere. In my experience, you can find such people and spaces in most major cities, and so a Kwanzaa celebration probably isn't too far away either. Everywhere else, though...

The only other option to find Kwanzaa celebrations, in my experience, are through Black student clubs in colleges. Not all of them do Kwanzaa activities due to many factors (cost, timing, interest, etc), but my undergrad college did and I know that others throughout the country do. However, such activities may not be open to the public (again, for varying reasons -- cost, timing, interest, college policy...).

When people ask about personal celebration, they usually ask about in-home celebration, treating community celebrations or celebrations in schools as less serious or legitimate. Kwanzaa in general is itself rare, but the idyllic in-home celebration is even rarer -- I myself was raised engaging in Kwanzaa almost entirely through community rather than in-home celebrations (though I started doing in-home for myself in recent years).

---

How, then, should we treat people who celebrate Kwanzaa, or even the non-Black people who don't celebrate it but acknowledge it as a valid holiday?

Honestly, I don't get why that has to be a question. Sure, it's a very marginal holiday, but it's also harmless to treat it respectfully and try and make room in your life in case you ever come across someone who does celebrate it.

I made this post because I often see this idea that people were "tricked" about Kwanzaa. I fail to see what harm has transpired. I don't get why people use their lack of awareness of Kwanzaa or Black communities that celebrate it as a "gotcha" that proves Kwanzaa is a scheme. When I do try to understand the logic underlying this, I come back to this idea that holidays and cultures have to earn respect and validation, that being included in our American idea of "Holiday Time" requires that holidays have a certain number of people we already respect, whom would be offended otherwise.

But that isn't a perspective that I share. I can't say how many people need to celebrate a holiday in America before I stop thinking it an insult or a lie that said holiday be included next to Christmas in a holiday greeting; the number doesn't exist because I don't hold Christmas or Hannukah in so high esteem. I value Christmas in as much as I recognize other people value it, the same is true of Hannukah and Yule (and even the pagan witches I've known didn't celebrate Yule). To me, the only thing one needs to be worthy of consideration as one of The Holidays is to simply be celebrated by people around this time of year.

#kwanzaa #kwanza #i spell it both ways when I tag cuz I know a lot of people get it wrong but the extra a is right #black culture #black community #happy holidays

[halfmoondaze]

Maybe Jack and reader have their first argument and she’s scared he will leave her, because she is used to people leaving her. His hearts break and he assures her that he loves her and won’t leave her because a small argument 🥺🥺 so angst into fluff?

Please Don't Leave Me

”Are you even listening to me?” Jack said as he ran his hand through his curls growing frustrated.

“I am. I understand your work is demanding, but I feel like I’m being pushed away and I miss you, I-"

“-I can’t do this anymore”

“Where are you going?”

“I need some time alone. This isn’t going anywhere”

And before Y/N could protest, he was gone.

Jack didn’t want to admit it but for the past weeks, they’ve been going through a rough patch. They’ve always been good at communicating with each other, but as of right now, there was a clear space between them.

This all became evident when Jack started canceling their plans, to get his album done. But as this turned into an ongoing thing, she couldn't help but think he was avoiding telling her he had grown bored of her and wanted to leave her.

It was all driving her to the edge. It was something Jack never got to see, as well as all those nights she would cry herself to sleep.

Jack stormed out of their shared apartment, but he didn’t get that far. He found himself parked in an empty parking lot as he tried to cool down. He had no choice but to get out of the apartment, to avoid saying something he’ll regret. He didn’t want to lose her.

When he arrived back at their place after being out for less than an hour, he entered the dark foyer, which was unusually quiet. For a moment, he thought Y/N had left, up until he heard the muffled cries coming from the kitchen.

As he quietly entered the kitchen, his heart broke at the sight of Y/N sitting on the kitchen floor hugging her knees silently crying.

He kneeled on her level and in that moment, she sensed his presence and slowly gazed up at him revealing her bloodshot eyes, wet cheeks, and red nose.

“Jack?”

“Hey” he softly said sitting next to her on the floor.

“I'm sorry I made you upset, please don’t leave me” she whispered.

At that moment, he swore he could feel his heavy heart break into a million pieces. He couldn’t help but feel like the biggest fool in the world for making her think for a moment he would abandon her.

He held her in his arms as she cried in his shirt.

“Why would you say something like that?” he asked.

“You left. I thought you weren’t coming back” she said between sobs.

“Hey, shh shh its ok” he said holding her close and kissing the top of her head continuously. “I’m the one that should be apologizing. I was being an idiot and I didn’t want to listen”

They held into each other until Y/N calmed down and her breathing pattern went back to normal. Then, they went to bed with Jack holding her close to his chest.

“Y/N?” he whispered.

“Hm?”

“Why would you think I would abandon you over an argument?” he softly asked.

At that moment, Y/N told him about how growing up, since she was a child, she always felt abandoned by those closest to her including her family.

“I’m so sorry I made you feel like that. I would never leave you over some small argument. I love you. And I'll make sure you feel loved as long as Im here”

And for the first time, Y/N felt validated for feeling that way. As for Jack, he made sure Y/N never had a reason to think he'll leave, even if that means having to reassure her of it every single day for the rest of his life.

She soon eased into his touch and before they knew it, they fell asleep.

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x you #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow one shot #jack harlow blurb #jackman thomas harlow #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow angst #bf!jack #shy!reader #jack harlow fanfiction #jack harlow fanfic #jack harlow fic #jack x y/n #jack x reader #jack x you #harlow jack

[canmom]

to beat on old drum, why should translation always be to a 'default'/'neutral', relatively formal version of a language? well you could make arguments from accessibility, injecting things that 'aren't there in the original' (or 'writing fanfic' as an angry nyaa commenter might put it), or losing nuances from the source.

but tranlsation is never going to be able to capture every nuance of the source, it's always a tradeoff. you can try to sound idiomatic in the target language, you can risk sounding plain or go for more approximate but lively expressions, or conversely you can go for something that doesn't sound like something a native speaker would write but develops a particular 'work in translation' cadence ("it can't be helped") which is worthwhile in its own right. you can even laboriously explain every missing nuance. there's no need to be dogmatic either - you can adopt a blend of strategies depending on what you think is most important.

the idea of a single 'correct' translation is an illusion. a translation is a new work designed to communicate as much as it can about the original. and if you don't have enough facility in the original language to follow along, the next-best thing is to have multiple translations that capture different facets according to what's picked up by different translators. and if you do know enough of the source language to pick up on an especially creative translation, that's a delightful thing.

this seems to be well understood in like, classics or philosophy, where it's reasonably common to produce new translations of a work. in translating modern media like anime... less so. I feel like it's a huge shame that original fansubs are made much less often today, and that so many arguments about translation seem to assume there must be one strict orthodoxy about the right way to translate. broadly speaking that orthodoxy has shifted - today the handful of still-active fansub groups like Good Job Media look with derision at the 't/n: keikaku means plan' past, and heavily prefer idiomatic translations.

is it ever 'necessary' to include honorifics when translating Japanese? probably not, you can probably find circumlocutions when they matter (e.g. have the characters argue about using titles). is that the 'best' way to translate? depends on your audience and what you want to communicate to them.

for example, in English, there's not really a 'thing you routinely say you routinely say before eating' as there is in many other languages. if we do say something before eating together, we'd probably use a loanword like bon appetit, but that would be rare and probably come across as a bit pretentious. in Japanese by contrast, people say いただきます itadakimasu as a standard ritual before-eating phrase. translators come up with all sorts of substitutions to try and find a substitute that sounds natural in English, potentially breaking the 'translate line by line' convention to insert something from elsewhere in the scene in the subtitle for itadakimasu.

and like, my feeling (from the stance of 'Japanese learner who watches a lot of anime') would be that if I knew most of my viewers would know at least that little bit of Japanese (and if they're downloading it from a fansubbing site, they probably do), I would just leave it untranslated. but leaving はい untranslated as in the above meme would be silly, because a good translation is simple and obvious (though 'yes' is not always a correct translation for はい!). however, I appreciate that there are various takes on this. it's fun to see the different ways people will translate いただきます! it becomes like a game. (the scene in Your Name where a bodyswapped character has to figure out the right personal pronoun is another fun one.)

so in this frame, I think translation targeting specific accents and dialects is really cool, because it can draw out all sorts of fascinating parallels. for example, the sentence ending particle ね is kind of like ', right?' - indicating that you think the speaker already knows what you're saying and you're looking for agreement/confirmation. it's a very common particle in Japanese, and it has a bit of a feminine connotation. how does that compare to the british slang 'innit'? or indeed the Singaporean 'lah'? you'd probably figure out a bunch about Japanese, British English and Singlish by thinking through when it would make sense to translate ね as 'innit', and likewise for 'lah'!

#linguistics #translation

[doyozen]

hola <3. can i request idolbf!haech feeling insecure, jealous and getting sulky bc he thinks, gn!reader is spending too much time w their male friend? and gn!reader makes it up to him w cuddles and assures him that he's the only one. love ur work <3

Hi lovely thank you for your request❤️ i hope you enjoye and thank YOU for loving my work ILY!!

idol!haechan x gn!reader

genre fluff

warnings haechan is a jealous boy </33

you were incredibly proud to say that lee donghyuck is the love of your life, although your relationship wasn’t perfect just like every other relationship in the world, the two of you hardly got into serious arguments and always found ways to talk clearly about your feelings.

haechan warned you that when you started dating, there was going to be times he was much too busy to spend time with you, and you understood that. you were fully aware that he’s an idol and is going to be busier than you liked, but you loved him enough to push through it and cheer him on.

it had started up again, nct 127 was preparing for a tour and your already very hard working boyfriend was pushing himself to his limit. you were worried, of course, but he insisted that he was strong enough and there was nothing to be concerned about.

“do you have plans tomorrow?” he asked, turning away from his gaming setup to plop next to you onto his bed. you instantly dropped your phone next to you to give him your full, undivided attention.

the bed dipped a bit when he got comfortable next to you, and you felt all of your stress and worries disappear with him being next to you and pulling you into him. “um, i think somin and myungsoo wanted to get lunch?”

his head perks up a bit, “myungsoo?”

“yeah, you met him, remember? at my birthday party a couple months ago?”

the boy thinks for a bit and then hums. “right, yeah, i remember.”

“we haven’t seen each other since the party, so it’ll be nice to catch up!” you continue, not thinking a single thing of it.

you hadn’t thought anything of it because the entirety you’ve been dating haechan, he had you believing he was not the jealous type, which was a big fat lie. of course you never really did much to make him jealous, not because you felt like you couldn’t have guy friends, you just didn’t have many friends in general. haechan tries to swallow the jealousy bubbling inside him because he didn’t want to seem like a crazy, overprotective boyfriend.

to his own surprise, he doesn’t think much of it the next day, he found himself getting over it over-night because at the end of the day, you chose him, and he chose you. he had no reason to be jealous.

“who’s this on y/n’s story?” mark asks him, pointing his phone in his groupmates direction to reveal a picture of the two friends and your lunch posted on your instagram story.

haechan sighs and grabs a towel to wipe the sweat dripping down his forehead, leaning in to get a good look at what mark was showing him.

fuck, he thinks, he’s attractive. why does mark know me so well? or… he thinks he does. i am NOT jealous. i’m their boyfriend. not him.

“what do you mean? that’s their friends, duh,” he says in a tone that made it seem like it was obvious, and it was. mark was just very used to seeing his best friend get jealous even over him having other friends. although it was secretly adorable, it was unlike him.

“right…” the older sings, not saying another word as the two of them got up to finish practice.

haechan calls you that night and even though it was quite late and you both were exhausted, you never went a day without talking on the phone. “hi, baby.” he greets, and your heart skips a beat at the pet name.

“hi,” you grin, “how was your day?”

“tiring,” he groans without hesitation, “taeyong hyung was being a little bitch—sorry, he’s a great leader but i absolutely hate when he puts on the strict leader act. it drives me crazy.”

you laugh at your boyfriends rants. “poor baby.”

“yes, feel bad for me. i have it so hard,” he sarcastically pours and you glare at him, making him raise his hands in defense. “sorryyyy. how was your day?”

“it was fine, i had fun with somin and myungsoo, and i had yummy food, but… i was thinking about you all day.”

haechan gasps and puts his hand to his heart, squeezing his eyes shut playfully. “y/n… cuteness overload. don’t do this to me.” he was so cheesy but it was so cute that you couldn’t help but laugh every single time.

the conversation goes on and he’s relieved that the day is over, because that means you’d never hang out with myungsoo ever again. or he was just telling himself that to feel better, because he would never ask you to stop hanging out with your friend when you didn’t even do anything wrong.

but then you do hang out with myungsoo… again. and again.

haechans becoming busier by the day and you miss him like crazy, you felt alone and isolated and so you try to out get of the house more to make yourself feel better, and convince yourself that you don’t have to depend on your boyfriend to have fun but it was just too damn hard. however, it doesn’t even cross his mind that you wanted to distract yourself from how much you miss him. he can’t stop thinking about how much time you’re spending with myungsoo.

his main concern was that you would tell him when you were hanging out with myungsoo, just not what you were doing together. he couldn’t help his clouded thoughts and started to get insecure over you and your attractive friend becoming closer. he wouldn’t have known that you never hung out with other guys alone unless it was in public, because he never bothered to ask.

“hiii,” you sing, “i miss you so much.”

“i miss you too,” he deadpans from the other side of the phone, and you feel your face drop.

“you okay?” you knew he wasn’t, you knew you had every right to be worried for his well-being, he should’ve listened to you when you told him to take care of his health first, you thought.

“i’m alright, just tired,” he says.

you nod to yourself, feeling bad that you can’t help him, but more feeling guilty for being upset that he wants to sleep more than he wants to talk to you. “oh, okay. go to sleep, babe. we’ll talk tomorrow.”

you wait for him to sleepily insist that he’s perfectly fine and he’d rather stay up all night talking to you, but he doesn’t this time. “okay, i love you. i’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

you stay silent for a second but respond. “goodnight.”

the phone hangs up and you immediately regret not telling him you love him back, you don’t even why you wouldn’t say it back, and now he’s going to sleep thinking you don’t love him. you panicked and couldn’t help but feel like it was something more than him being tired, but you couldn’t push or force it out of him.

the thought keeps you up at night and so the morning after, you text haechan good morning and tell him you were sorry for not saying i love you. you thought he probably hadn’t thought much of it and you were being dramatic, but he tells you it’s okay and that he understands if you were upset.

that’s when you take matters into your own hands and message one of the members.

you: mark

is haechan okay

mark: he seems fine to me

why?

you: hes been kind of distant lately

and not in the way that he’s busy with schedules and things like that, but it feels like there’s something he’s not telling me

i’m sorry i dont want to be that type of partner but im seriously worried for him

mark: oh y/n :( he hasnt said anything to me im really sorry

he hasnt even seemed off to me at all, like hes pretty normal at practice and rehearsal

well as normal as haechan gets

and don’t apologize thats really sweet of you hes lucky to have you seriously

you: oh okay

why is he distant to meeee im sad

but thank you anyways

mark: ofc!

you realize quickly after that you probably shouldn’t have done that, because mark telling you that he seemed completely normal in his presence made you feel even worse.

you hadn’t seen each other in a little over two weeks and you figured it may have just been getting really hard on him not seeing you, the same as it was for you not seeing him. you didn’t want to assume anything but you also didn’t want to believe that he could’ve been mad at you for something.

for the first time in a good week, you cancel your plans with myungsoo and take the day to prepare to surprise your boyfriend.

you didn’t tell him that you’d be at the dorms when he got home that night, and so you picked up a few of his favorite snacks and drinks and made yourself comfortable in his bed while you waited for his arrival. after about an hour of being alone in the dorm, you hear the front door open and your heart starts pounding.

you had no idea why you were nervous to see yor boyfriend at all, maybe because you were worried he really was mad at you and the plan would backfire.

still, you pretend to not be phased and look relaxed as his footsteps get closer, and soon enough his door swung open and there he stood. his eyes immediately lock with yours and you watch his blank expression change to surprise. every single negative thought leaves his mind at the sight of you, and you can visibly see the tension leave body as his shoulders drop in relief.

“hi,” you greet sweetly, standing from his bed and be drops his bag without a word and walks over to you.

haechan still says nothing when he wraps his arms around you, damp with sweat but you honestly couldn’t care less. you return the gesture and you comfortably hold each other in silence for a little while.

“i know it’s late, i’m sorry,” you apologize once you pulled away.

“what’re you doing here?” he asks, disregarding your statement. not that he wasn’t happy to see you, just wasn’t prepared to face you after getting in his head about you and your hot friend.

“i was worried about you, and i miss you.”

his eyes become even softer, suddenly feel guilty and he drops his head. “i’m sorry.”

your furrow your eyebrows in confusion, “what for?”

“preparing for tour has been more difficult than i thought, and i’m exhausted, and you’re the only person who makes me feel sane and it’s so fucking hard when i can’t see you. i just miss you and… and, i don’t know. you have a really hot friend and it makes me sad because he’s hot. i wish he was ugly.” he rants.

you listen to him in full understanding at all his words, until he got to the last statement. “i get you, and i miss you too… but, are you—are you talking about myungsoo?”

“i know it’s stupid and trust me, i feel stupid but i don’t know…” he pouts, “you’ve been spending a lot of time with him…”

you know the situation was a very un-laughable situation, but you truly can’t help but chuckle at his mumbled words when talking about myungsoo. “haechan… myungsoo and i are just friends, i promise. i’ll stop hanging out with him if you want—“

“no, i know you’re just friends and i am not accusing you of anything,” he replies quickly, “i don’t want you to stop hanging out with him because of me. i just hate how attractive he is. i’m sorry. it’s stupid but i feel insecure for some reason.”

you nod, “i hear you, and it’s not stupid. i could’ve been better at reassuring you, but you’re my boyfriend… not him. i love you, not him. i don’t think i need to tell you that you’re hotter than him, your head is big enough.”

you smile when you manage to break a laugh out of him. “no, actually, it’s not. i need you to tell me how hot and sexy and awesome i am or i’ll cry.”

you playfully sigh and after he sits down on his bed, you crawl into his lap with your legs hanging over his and your arms wrapped around his neck. “lee haechan, you are the most attractive person i have and will ever lay my eyes on. you are so perfect inside and out, and i love you.”

he didn’t expect you to take it seriously as the two of you joked around way too much but he was pleasantly surprised with your response. he gives you a cocky smirk, but you can tell his heart was beating fast in his chest and his stomach was exploding in butterflies. “you promise?”

you nod as he hugs your waist tighter, “i promise.”

then he sighs loudly and falls back into his bed, taking you with him. “i’m so in love with you, it’s sick.”

“don’t ever get jealous again, i’m yours, and you’re mine,” you say, “and it’s only and always you—”

“y/n, please,” your boyfriend stops you, “my heart can’t take this.”

“and, there will never be a reason for you to be jealous or insecure.” you fight a laugh, watching him bury his face into your neck shyly. he wasn’t shy whatsoever, you just managed to make him flustered. it was basically a super power.

“now that i know this is what it takes to get you to compliment me, i’m gonna get jealous much more often,” he nods.

you gasp, slapping a hand on his chest which only earns you a laugh from him. “shut up! i compliment you all the time! don’t like you don’t watch your own fancams, either.”

“i knowwww, i’m kidding, i love you. thank you for giving me all the compliments in the world.”

you hum in satisfaction, “yes, of course. i love you so much.”

the boy leans over and equips you with a very sloppy kiss right on your cheek, to which you groan in disgust at the feeling of his saliva but smile lovingly. “i love you more.”

#nct #nct dream #nct 127 #haechan #nct fanfic #nct dream fanfic #nct 127 fanfic #haechan fanfic #haechan x reader #nct fluff #nct scenarios

[kentokrazy]

a/n: 🙈 this is terrible but my mind is rotting

ex-sorcerer!nanami kento x gn!reader

warnings: death, grief, could be considered toxic but not in my opinion

nanami kento's red flag

* i saw a tiktok edit so now i'm thinking about this

* but dating nanami kento, he's the perfect man

* brings you flowers

* walks closest to the street

* listens to you, like actually listens when you say things

* he always keeps a level head, during arguments, during stressful moments and even when he's upset

* when he dated in you he invested in you

* that means there are no big life changes made without talking about it

* his finances are even stricter than before, he's going to save every penny he can

* his eyes are on the housing market every other day, checking houses in malaysia and nicer neighborhoods

* if you so mention the idea of kids, he's got schools bookmarked, scribbles of life long plans

* he remembers anniversaries, holidays, birthdays

* but there's one thing

* one, small, tiny thing

* the littlest of red flags

* and if you didn't know him, it could've sent you running

* because nanami trusts you completely, he loves you deeply and wouldn't make this much of a change in his life if he didn't

* but if he could lock you away from all harm he would

* you can feel it when he holds your hand, when he doesn't stray from your side for more than a minute in public

* when he requested you share your location

* if you don't answer your phone when he calls, his heart seizes and his palms get sweaty

* when he doesn't get a single text from you, he can feel the rippling of an anxiety attack

* sometimes, if you sleep too stiffly, his fingers on your neck can stir you.

* he doesn't mean to be overbearing, not really, but can you blame him?

* at the ripe age of 17, he carried his best friends dead body back to his school

* and sometimes the nightmares reminding him of the fact aren't always haibara, sometimes they're of you

* those are the days he seems to be incredibly nervous, driving you to work with a hand on your thigh, picking you up, walking so close he might as well be a backpack when you go to the grocery store

* he doesn't trust others to get close on those days

* he was banned from the convenience store down the block

* nanami's left the sorcerer world for good this time, he has a good reason to do so

* but sometimes he can't help it if he notices a curse getting too close to you (or anyone he deems worth saving)

* sometimes he finds it hard to breathe, thoughts of what could happen to you when he's not around drown him, in those times all he can do is close his eyes, try to remember that those days are behind him

* and when that doesn't work, he calls you, leaves work early, finds you and just needs to feel you

* there are few days he cracks under the pressure, and those come months after shoving those feelings away but you can always see it coming

* he forgets things when those days come, not important things- no, but little things like drinking, eating, sleeping

* he lays down next to you, sure, his hand is somewhere on you but he just stares at the wall, the back of your head or the window

* his bags are deep, his hands are shaky and he becomes the husk you first met, where the only thing on his mind was money and forgetting

* but when he breaks it's bloody and red skin, his nails are bitten and fingers with hangnails

* his hair is tussled and his clothes are disorderly, tie discarded and sweat soaking the fabric of his shirt

* his eyes are watery and your phone is filled with missed calls and panicked messages

* a cool cloth and silent holding is the beginnings of piecing him together, brushing his hair out of his face and whispered assurances bring him back from the fog in his brain

* nanami is well spoken, polite and god forbid he use the wrong honorifics around you, but here he's choking, spitting up and crying, his hands are clutching you like he's not sure you're really there

* that's he's not sure he's real

* propping him up in the bathroom, washing his red skin and sitting with him ground him

* trying to remind him of his change, his growth and his safety

* nanami is a foodie, he prides himself on cooking the best food and buying the freshest vegetables he can find

* but his dirty secret is that on days when he can't stomach anything, can't do much but cry and worry and sometimes call an old student that reminds him of a friend to make sure they're okay, he likes one thing

* a cup of noodles that a friend used to buy is the one of the only things that he can digest, as much as he wishes it wasn't true

* there's a shelf full of them, tucked away from the rest of the world, and each time one gets used another takes it's place

* noodles with the side of a particular soda and a childhood candy stitches together the bleeding part of his heart

* and when that meal is over and his mental fight has exhausted him, nanami sleeps like a rock, for hours (once he slept for two days) he keeps his arms wound around you so tightly

* because his red flag is in the shape of his bleeding heart

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento #ex-sorcerer!nanami kento #god damn you tiktok #jjk x reader #nanami kento headcanons #bf!nanami kento