After David tells him that his ex has arrived for Career Day and it’s not even the Wheeler that he asked for, Steve marches over to Mike like, “What are you doing here?”
Wow, David thinks to himself. He’s been told that Steve has some problems with his memory - apparently he compensated for it with a truly insane online calendar - but he didn’t expect him to forget about a whole human being. Just, wow.
Steve loudly tells Mike that he’s never had a real job and Mike scoffs at him and tells him that he wrote for a comic book website for three years. Journalism is just writing with a fancy degree. Will and Mike created a comic book together so, “I’m published.”
“Robin is published,” Steve stresses (Steve’s best friend, David knows that one). “If that was the only qualification I wanted than I would’ve asked Robin to come.”
They start squabbling again in whispered voices so David turns to Dustin and tries to alleviate some of the awkwardness with, “Steve, uh, really has a type, huh?”
Dustin squints at him, “Did you just meet him? Today?”
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Ok phandom peeps, I need to get something off my chest. I cannot stop thinking about it, it’s so funny that this happened to me!
So I’ve been casually perusing the DP fandom for a while, right? Like for several years at least! What can I say? I like art! So at various points I had talked to my aunt about some stuff related, like fun stuff about the phandom and the existence of ghost king aus and stuff. Recently though, I found a fanfic that I spent AN ENTIRE DAY reading and doing nothing else! Like I stayed up late the night before, woke up to immediately read more! I don’t normally read fanfics, let alone any long form story, cuz my attention span is shit and has been shit basically all my life! So in the evening when I was a good chunk of the way through the fic, I talked to my aunt about it! Cuz it’s funny! I found a lot of things in it very amusing and wanted to share!
And then she asked for a link…
The next thing I know, within a few months, probably 3 months later at most, my aunt starts telling me about phandom lore I had never even heard of before! She literally made an ao3 account!!! Guys I am floored! I’ve been idly watching from the shadows for so long, and then I accidentally get my aunt into the phandom and she starts telling me about a red duck candle that’s apparently been integral DPxDC lore for YEARS!
What have I DONE???
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this has probably been said so many times before but the poeticism of jawbone, the werewolf who nearly turned adaine into a werewolf, becoming her adopted father is so beautiful
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Eddie: What? I'm not aggressive!
Steve: Last Tuesday, you wacked me with a pair of crocs and stole my chocolate chips?
Eddie: Survival of the fittest, bitch.
~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: That’s the longest worm I’ve ever seen.
Steve: That’s a snake.
~~~~~~~~~
Steve: State your name, rank, and intention.
Eddie: Eddie, Eddie, fun.
~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers.
Steve: Eddie, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.
~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: Which is correct, seven and five IS thirteen, or seven and five ARE thirteen?
Steve: Neither.
Steve: Because it's twelve.
~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: I need you to come meet me, and I need you to come alone.
Steve: And I need you to be less vague and weird.
~~~~~~~~~~
Steve: I have to say, I'm a little embarrassed for you.
Eddie: This is a sports-related injury. It makes me look cool!
Steve: Tripping over a basketball on your way to the bathroom is not cool!
~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: Hey there Vecna, It's me, ya boi.
Steve: Eddie, NO!
~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: I was going to suggest we do Marilyn Monroe and JFK roleplay, but I’d get way too into it.
Steve: What- how?
Eddie: You’d be like “come to bed … Mr. President” and I’d be like, “I need to increase the amount of American military advisors in South Vietnam by a factor of 18.”
~~~~~~~~~~
Eddie: Y'know, I once knew a man who said to me: “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” He also had a pair of sideburns that would cause even Jude Law’s face to weep in forfeit. You put those lemons in a sack and beat your enemies with ‘em! And maybe if you beat ‘em hard enough the bag will split open and lemon juice will spray into their eyes, causing intense burning pains as you crush them into a citrus-y pulp!
Steve: Wait, wait, wait, wait. Their heads or the lemons?
Eddie: Whatever caves first!
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No amount of character assassination in the later seasons could ever be enough to make me hate Danny Castellano. It will never work because I KNOW that isn’t you, my short king. How could I stop loving the red magnetic reading glasses? The Secret Santa dance? The dorky way he got so excited about the bomber jacket? How nervous he was for his driving test? The strip tease to American Woman? The way his legs dangle when he sits on the countertop with flowers? His sad, lonely piano playing? The way he raised his little brother and supports his entire family? How he apologized for being too harsh about Mindy being late and admitted it was due to his daddy issues? The tailor-made workout plan full of celebrity scenarios? Reading Bridget Jones’s Diary in a terrible British accent? Writing out a list of all his secrets to tell Mindy to prove he trusts her? His fear of the ocean out of respect? His old man rants about not turning on the heat when you could just put on a sweater and do some pushups? The plane kiss??? His exercise addiction as his only mental health coping strategy? The gingerbread houses every Christmas? His love of Ken Burns? His lil beanie when he’s going to the gym? The way he found out about his half-sister and immediately agreed to go to her soccer game? His attempts to make interpersonal chitchat with varying degrees of success? The way he broke his no lying rule to get Mindy out of hot water and did a TERRIBLE job? His nervous sweats? His love of sandwiches, even at parties at other people’s houses? His loyalty to the people he loves? THEY TURNED YOUR GRUMPINESS INTO AN UGLY, BITTER, ABUSIVE THING BUT I SAW ALL THAT GROWTH FOR THREE SEASONS AND I KNOW BETTER, MY BELOVED!!!
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i love the finale of season 3 rb ITS SO GOOD and it hurts my heart but it’s so sweet and RAHH I WILL NEVER GET OVER ITTT
Like Heatwave gently but firmly telling Chief “With all due respect, sir, it’s not your call to make” AND THEN THEY GO AND BASICALLY SACRIFICE THEMSELVES knowing FULL WELL that they might never recover from this AUGH
Heatwave carries so much respect for Chief Burns and we see that respect form and grow and it all leads up to this point where Heatwave is essentially like “we all care about this family so much, we’d do anything for you guys” and then THEY DO and then we see how upset Cody is and how upset KADE is ohhh don’t get me STARTEDD because I will never stop
It’s the culmination of all the soft moments, all of the rescues and hardships the entire Burns family (including the bots you cowards they ARE family, it’s not “the Burns and the bots” it’s just the Burns at this point so when I say Burns I mean THE HUMAN BURNS AND THE BOTS CAN ANYONE HEAR MEE) has led up to his moment of loyalty and respect and straight up love and it’s so plain for anyone to see it.
And that’s why Frankie putting the unedited video into the time capsule is so important, not just for the future residents of Griffin Rock to see the kind of good people the Burns are, but for the whole world to see the character of the family. It’s also a declaration that these guys, the Bots, are important to us and our family lineage. We have loved them and they have loved us since day one, that’s why we think it’s important to have that notion in the future as well, yk what I mean?
The Burns and the Greenes family are SO IMPORTANT TO ME and the Bots are just as much family as any other human in that fold, and they were prepared and entirely willing to sacrifice themselves for that family, no matter the protest
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