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#even going as far as to say that i Have what she does without even trying to get me seen by a medic (this when i was 16 and used a cane)
ninzied · 3 days
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where ground meets light
alex and henry go on a double date. modern au. based on the prompt: a kiss to distract, for @caressthosecheekbones. ~1.2k.
They’ve only been dating a few weeks when he suggests it.
“Sorry.” Henry has to take this all in for a moment. Surely he must have misheard. “You want to go on a double date? With Alex?”
“Is that weird?” Gregory asks, in the manner of one who’s merely being rhetorical. “He’s your best friend. I want to get to know him better.”
“Well. Sure,” Henry says, because he cannot think of a single reasonable objection that a normal person would make. A normal person who’s not been harboring an ill-advised torch for his best friend for years. “Though,” he hedges, as if the thought’s just occurring to him, “I’m not sure he’s dating anyone at the moment.”
Henry would know if he is. In fact, according to Pez, the whole world would be hard-pressed not to notice because of the moods Henry gets in when it happens.
But it’s been well over a month now since his latest “little London fog,” as Pez calls it, so Henry mentions the idea to Alex as an afterthought, thinking there’s no real danger of him saying yes.
“Great!” says Alex brightly. “I’ll bring Yvette.”
He’ll bring fucking whom?
.
Yvette is a bloody knockout, of course.
Henry expects nothing less. Alex is only the most beautiful man who’s ever walked the planet, so it stands to reason that his date should look as she does.
The more unfortunate thing is that Yvette is also supremely likable. She’s warm, and funny, and seems to share Alex’s knack for livening up the conversation as though they’ve all been friends for years.
By all counts, the date should be a success. Henry laughs more than he thought he would and drinks far less than he thought he would need to. Alex is impressed by the food, which makes Henry feel absurdly pleased to have chosen this particular restaurant.
And, perhaps most importantly: because they’re seated at a round table with Alex angled off to his left, Henry hasn’t caught himself staring at him even once.
Perhaps he’s not so at risk of giving himself away as he’d thought.
.
The trouble, turns out, starts elsewhere.
The trouble is that Henry doesn’t have to be looking at Alex to be attuned to his every feeling and movement.
The way Alex’s knee keeps jittering under the table. The tic in his finger as he taps, then stills. Taps, then stills. The fact that he’s hardly stopped for a breath since they sat down.
He’s antsy, and miserable, but he’s trying so hard and his smile’s so vibrant that not a single person can tell. Not a one but Henry, and he needs to do something, needs Alex to know that he’s seen.
“Darling,” says Henry, without even thinking, and puts his hand on Alex’s wrist. Christ. Fuck. What did he say? What is he doing? But none of that seems to matter right now. “Are you all right?”
He feels Alex relax as though instantly calmed by that one simple touch, and Henry knows that if Alex hadn’t been all right before, he is more so now, somehow.
“Another round of drinks?” Henry asks the table, not even waiting, not even looking, before pulling Alex to his feet. “We’ll be right back.”
.
This is the difference between them. They both have their moods, but Henry wears his on his sleeve and has to shut himself away until it’s passed.
Alex, meanwhile, hides his in plain sight from most people, but Henry likes to think he’s not most people, and as soon as they’re at the bar out of earshot he looks Alex in the eye and says, “What happened? What’s wrong?”
“Was it that obvious? Fuck.” Alex shakes his head. “It’s nothing, Hen, just—want to make a good first impression, you know?”
Henry’s brow furrows. He tells that jealous little twinge in his chest that now is not the time. “Is this your first date with Yvette or something?” No wonder he’s not heard of her earlier. “Christ, Alex, why didn’t you say so sooner? You didn’t have to come if you didn’t—”
Alex laughs under his breath for some reason. “We’re not dating.”
“You’re—what?”
“She’s a friend,” says Alex. “She’s helping me out. And if the lov—I mean, if my best friend’s boyfriend wants to meet me, I’m going to need all the help I can get.”
Henry’s chest is positively aching now. “He’s not my boyfriend,” he says, firmly despite how breathless he feels. “It’s not that dire, trust me. We’ve only been on, like, three dates before this one.”
“Oh.” Alex seems to process this. His expression looks lighter for just a split second before it gets all heavy again. “Well, if you’re wanting there to be a fifth, you should probably talk to him before it’s too late. Looks like he’s about to leave.”
Henry glances over his shoulder, and sighs. “I should probably talk to him, yeah.”
.
Gregory is putting his coat on as Henry walks over. They both muster up a small smile, Henry’s more rueful, Gregory’s resigned.
“I’m really sorry,” Henry says, and means it.
“It’s okay. I’m not going to make it into a thing,” Gregory says. “Unless you’re about to tell me to stay. That would be pushing it.”
“I’m not,” Henry admits. “What I did want to say is that—well, I haven’t been entirely honest with myself about what I want. Which means I haven’t been honest with you, and that’s not fair to you at all.”
Gregory nods. “I do like you, Henry. You deserve to be happy. And I deserve to not be the guy that you use as an excuse to keep standing in your own way.” He glances at Alex back at the bar. Yvette is there now too, flirting up a storm with the bartender.
“I wanted to get to know your best friend,” Gregory continues. “And now that I have, I can say that he’s a really lucky guy.” He gives Henry a meaningful look. “Even if he doesn’t know it yet.”
.
Alex straightens as Henry approaches the bar, an untouched whiskey in one hand. “What are you doing? I thought you were going to go talk to him.”
“I did.” Henry shrugs, and helps himself to Alex’s drink.
Alex is looking as though he’ll never again know happiness in this world. “I fucked things up for you, didn’t I. Fuck.”
“What? No,” says Henry, but Alex doesn’t seem to be listening. “Alex. Alex.”
“Do you want me to go talk to him? I can explain.” Alex runs a hand through his hair, sending his curls all breathtakingly askew.
He doesn’t even know, Henry marvels. He doesn’t even know.
“I mean, it’s not your fault that I—” Alex breaks off with a frustrated sigh before starting back up again. “I’ll tell him that you don’t feel the same way, and that I’m really fucking sorry I ruined your night with my—you know—feelings, and—”
“You’ll do no such thing,” Henry says.
Then he leans in and kisses him, because Alex is an unstoppable force, and this is the one place where Henry has not been brave enough to meet him, until now.
Alex goes quiet at last, save for the sigh he lets out as their lips part and his hands find Henry’s waist and pull in.
“Whoa,” he breathes after a moment. “Yeah, we gotta do that again.”
“Shh,” Henry murmurs, “we were doing so well.” He puts his hand on Alex’s nape, drawing him back in.
Alex kisses him back like it’s the only thing that centers him, the only thing that keeps him grounded, and Henry—well.
Henry can’t help but think that it feels a bit like flying, too.
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thedarkdisgrace · 3 days
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Ok, follow up post to the original cause I wanted to actually offer my analysis/interpretation on this.
I feel like this is a right/left brain analogy 🧵
Dazai covering his right side, the side supposedly responsible for the emotional & artistic things. It says alot about his mindset, accurate for that time.
It’s intriguing, then, Kouyou covers the “logical” side
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I feel like this lends to why Chuuya & Kouyou do get along well. While both Chuuya & Kouyou are no doubt very intelligent (Asagiri literally refers to Chuuya as a genius) they both still lean very much into their emotional side as well. Even if Kouyou seemingly does so less.
Kouyou reveals herself, however, not only in her care for Chuuya but we mainly see it how she handled the situation with Kyoka.
She could have insisted Kyoka come back without ever changing her mind but when Dazai presents her with a way to save Kyoka from dark, she agrees quickly.
Kouyou clearly cares & wanted to help & protect Kyoka even if she went about it poorly. She was trying to help based on her past experiences, lest we forget that she tried to leave the mafia herself once, for *love* no less. She also tends to get emotional when talking about her past or her wish to help Kyoka.
But once she was presented with another solution, a far better one, she didn’t do “what’s best for the mafia”. Kouyou agreed to what was best for Kyoka & that was definitely a more emotional choice.
This is an area where Chuuya & Kouyou align. So, of course they would get along.
Chuuya always seems to find the balance between his logic and emotion. However, he can easily & often does lean more into his emotional side first, then his logical side.
It’s similar for Kouyou, even if we don’t see it as much from her.
Back to Dazai then, when he left the mafia & the cover on Dazai’s “emotional side” was gone Dazai seemed to also move more towards that balancing of the two sides.
He started off heavily relying on his logical brain & struggled emotionally. Often feeling numb or apathetic mostly, hence his suicidal ideation.
Then he meets Chuuya & this shifts. Chuuya forces him to experience new feelings. As Chuuya is a living breathing example of most things Dazai felt the world lacked. It opened Dazai to the idea that there is more to the world, there is more to *people*. Chuuya intrigues Dazai enough to make him want to live a little longer again. Chuuya gave him a reason to keep going, a promise of more.
From the moment he met Chuuya, it was a process of letting more & more emotions seep into his mind & his heart. We see how he feared for Chuuya in 15 even after they just met, even though Dazai *knew* it was a plan.
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I might even venture to go as far as to say Dazai may not have feared for someone else’s life that hard before. It was a burst of unrecognizable emotions to him. After this, he only had more & more emotion seep in as the years went by. In Storm Bringer he was ready to sacrifice the city to give Chuuya a choice.
That relationship opened Dazai up to others later, namely Oda & Ango. Which only further encouraged the intermingling of his logical brain and his emotions. Then reaching the point at which the bandages were finally removed entirely and then he, like Chuuya, moved to striving to find the balance rather than relying on one side.
Bringing us back to current Dazai as he is still attempting to find that balance.
He still leans more his logical side. This, of course, in contrast to Chuuya who, while intelligent, more easily leans into the emotional.
Yet another thing between them that completes & balances each other. Soukoku will always pull the other back when drifting too far.
So, of course, Soukoku complement each other & it benefits them both.
Having Kouyou on Chuuya’s other side I think also does help Chuuya stay grounded while in the mafia. Chuuya isn’t one to lose who he is but I think having someone else who he knows *cares* like he does helps.
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Now, additionally, if we apply this to Beast, I think this also says alot about beast Dazai & why Asagiri says beastzai would be the hardest for someone to portray.
Because *this* Dazai, is perhaps *too* far into his emotional side. He’s always intelligent but in beast, his actions aren’t fully logical, they’re emotional.
He appears cold & calculating as always but he saw another version of himself suffer the great loss of a best friend & allowed his emotional desire to prevent that from happening take control. Thus, his emotional side takes over, thus him covering the opposite side from canon Dazai, he’s covering his “logical” side.
I feel like this is the main difference between all the various Dazai we’ve seen.
PM Dazai relied heavily on his logical side, especially before meeting Chuuya. He rarely took emotion into account unless it involved the 3 people he actually cared for. We see him make emotional choices when it involves Chuuya, Oda, and Ango. Dazai did seem to let more and more emotion seep in over time as a result of knowing them, however, leading to that moment the bandages are removed.
Beastzai is leaning far too heavily into his emotional side, getting lost in it even. Acting solely on an emotional desire rather than a logical one. His desire to prevent a tragedy. He only was using his intellect to further that emotional desire.
Current/ADA Dazai is the balance of the two, and seemingly the closest to happiness.
ADA Dazai uses his logical brain as always but he also actually takes emotion into account as well and has more people he actually cares for now.
I think that says alot to the theme of bsd, leaning into that “everything is grey” dynamic. Everything is about the *balance* of things. Showcasing that anything in extremes in either direction doesn’t work.
Anyway, just some thoughts I had and interpretations of mine. Take them as you want, as always.
Oh and just to be clear, I don’t think Dazai was ever “emotionless”, even at his worse. Even if he was numb and apathetic. He was also lonely.
Just saying the more people he came to care about (Chuuya, Oda, Ango then later the ADA) the more he was able to feel a variety of emotion.
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jl-micasea-fics · 2 days
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Freak Show Talk | 3racha, lmh
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𝙭𝙡𝙞𝙭. 𝙞'𝙢 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙨𝙤 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙙
! fwb, free use ft. all, fujoshi fem reader, poly, enm, angst, smut, dead dove do not eat. <1k wc. 18+ readers only !
「Contents List」 「Act 1」  「© March 2024 by jl-micasea-fics」
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She finished work two hours ago. He can’t put it off any longer.
His loitering in the bookstore—a place he would argue is much designed for loitering—loses its novelty when his already blistered feet begin to ache. He scopes the city streets to find further employment, but three coffees from three different cafes soon inspire altogether different urges—ones he’d rather see to in the comfort of his own bathroom.
As he enters the apartment, he hears—to coin her term—culinary chaos. Pots and pans clang, a tempting sizzle leads him to the kitchen, where the girl he’s been thinking about all day despite his very best efforts appears to be cooking.
Thoughtlessly, he approaches, peering around her. A frying pan of steak, butter and garlic simmers on the induction hob. She startles on his presence, almost tips the pan until he steadies her elbow.
“Hi.” She blinks up at him.
He swallows. Lets her go immediately. His fingertips burn. “You’re cooking?”
“You’re always telling me I should try.”
“You couldn’t have started smaller?”
“When have you ever known me to do that?”
“Fair.”
In a summery, loose dress befitting the sweltering weather, he wants to point out she's not dressed for cooking, especially where hot oil is concerned. So much skin is on display; her smooth chest, her arms, her lovely neck. His face flames; he busies himself with a glass of water.
“How was your day?” she asks.
Hell. Yours?
“Fine. Yours?”
“Same. Supervisor Jin wasn’t in though, which was nice. We got to choose the playlist.” She grins— Minho can’t bear fucking it. How is she so okay? Did she not cry? Did her heart not tear down the middle like his? Does she really not care?
He slams the empty glass to the counter. “I’m going to take a shower.”
“Want me to bring you a towel?”
Fuck this.
“Do you not remember what happened last night?” Minho snaps.
Her face falls. “Of course I do.”
“Really? Because you’re just acting like—” He gestures vaguely. “Like nothing’s changed. Like we’re still best friends, and we’re still—”
“Are we not best friends? You called it off to save our friendship, didn’t you? Or did I misunderstand?”
“N— No. I did. I mean; that was one of the reasons. I just didn’t expect you to be so... fine.”
She blinks. Her face is bathed in a stream of afternoon light, and like a diminishing veil, he sees her eyes glistening, her chin quivering, her cheeks aching with the force of smiling.
“I’m not fine.”
Her voice breaks. Tar oozes in Minho’s gut and squidges through his intestines, cramping everything. He wants to die.
“I’m so far from fine I don’t know if I'll ever be again, but I'm trying. I’m trying to just... get through the next hour. I’m trying.”
She cries, and he feels like his world might end. It’s always been this way. He can’t fucking stand it. Can’t stand her pain, her secrets, her issues—
“Would you rather this instead?” She swipes her damp cheeks. “For me to be miserable?”
“No. You know I hate it when you cry.”
“I don’t want to cry. Fuck, Minho— I just... I want to be better. I don’t want to be like this anymore.”
“Like what?”
She shakes her head. “I want to be the girl you could actually stand to be around.”
“Don’t say that. Please, don’t. It’s all wrong. This is all fucking wrong. I just wanted to understand you. To make sense of this disconnect. But you won’t talk to me. I feel like I’ve lost you and I don’t even know why.”
She boldly steps towards him, takes his hands and holds them to her chest.
“I know you don’t understand, and I’m sorry. One day you will. I hope. But I’ve got to get better, Min. I’ve got to learn how to manage all this. I’ve got to be kind to myself. I want to be able to tell you everything without worrying that the truth will force you away from me. I want to share my thoughts with you without all the shame. To open the box and show you what’s inside without being fucking terrified of it.”
Minho stares. Her hands are cold, her chest warm. He feels the pulse of her heart beneath her skin.
“I’ll get you back, bestie,” she whispers. “Count on it.”
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𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚, 𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜, 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙢𝙚 >
𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙖 𝙣𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙? 𝙨𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙠𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙚 ♡ >
< 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨 | 𝙣𝙚𝙭𝙩 >
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Alt Assistant Pt 7 (finale)
Kara reflexively keeps her distance from Lena, for all of two days, until she realizes that while respecting Lena's boundaries is important, she does not have to respect any boundary set by Lex.
She comes to this conclusion late Sunday night, and makes a point to be in the office early to make her point. She's lucky Lena's already there, plugging miserably away at a spreadsheet R&D had sent to her the Friday before. Kara plunks down her boss's coffee of the desk, nearly sloshing it, and scowls when Lena turns her gaze up at her.
"You don't have to do everything your brother tells you," she says, far more scathingly than she intends. It backfires when Lena interprets her tone as petulance.
"I hardly think two days without sex warrants a tantrum Miss Danvers," she responds coolly. Her gaze returns to her computer. "Nor do our trysts qualify you to pass judgement on my relationship with my brother."
"I know you better than you think," Kara snaps. "And living under Lex's thumb isn't a good look on you."
At that, Lena's gaze snaps back up with razor sharp precision, skewering Kara to the spot. Her jaw tightens. "My respect for my brother--"
"Isn't respect!" Kara bites back. She knows she skirts the limits of Lena's goodwill, but she can't help the anger and resentment that bubbles up. "It's control, and you know it."
At that, Lena's scowl deepens, but her focus skitters away, proving the veracity of Kara's accusation.
"You are your own person," Kara pushes. "And you're capable of making your own decisions."
Lena's moment of concession evaporates with a scowl. "Get out."
It's enough to make Kara see red, but she manages to keep her temper in check.
"Fine," she clips out. She turns on her heel and marches towards the door, only to pause with her fingers wrapped in a fist around the handle. "And maybe you should think why Lex has such a problem with you being fucking happy for once."
With that, she yanks the door open and all but slams it shut behind her when she leaves.
----
Prepping a charity gala isn't easy-- or fun-- when they can hardly stand to be in the same room together without snapping. It involves a lot of "fines"s and "just get it done"s and "yes, miss luthor"s, but it eventually culminates in a lavish, extravagant affair that the guests seem to enjoy.
Kara hovers in her floor length gown that snugs in all the right places, yet leaves her arms bare to give her room to actually work during set up, and now cools her down as she takes a moment to breathe.
She knows Lena is here, by way of a curt text received an hour ago, but has yet to actually see her in the throng of well-dressed patrons. She does see Lex though, who somehow manages to look smug even as he glowers at her. It's nearly halfway through the night when Kara finally catches a glimpse of her boss.
Her mouth promptly goes dry.
Lena's dressed in a black chiffon dress that hugs her hips. When she turns, Kara sees the thin straps that leave the ivory skin of her back largely bare-- and the long silver chain that dangles against Lena's spine.
The vision is so distracting that it takes Kara a long moment to notice that Lena had turned towards a tug on her wrist, and that it was Lex who now gripped it tightly.
Kara watches their heated exchange of hissed words until Lena finally wrenches her wrist free of her brother's grasp. Lex's features darken as he issues what can only be a final warning before taking his leave. Lena watches him go for a long moment before finally turning.
Their eyes lock.
In that moment, Lena is laid bare-- Kara can see the shock of their unexpected connection (Lena has been avoiding her), and registers the brief up-and-down of Lena's gaze as she's scanned by wide green eyes. Then, Kara sees that dreaded word again: don't.
Only this time it's not directed at Kara, but rather inward, a silent scold towards Lena herself, combating the flush of desire written clear across Lena's cheeks. But then, almost as soon as it appears, it's eclipsed by a sudden hardening of Lena's gaze, now resolute as Lena comes to a conclusion known only to her.
Kara stares as Lena marches towards her, determined and unflinching. She barely has the time to grin before her arms are full of Lena, and warm hands sandwich her face fiercely as she's kissed long and deep.
When Lena comes up for air, breathless words come tumbling out.
"You're fired," she says. Their foreheads rest together, and Lena's hands have yet to move from where her thumbs rub gently against Kara's cheeks.
Now, Kara does grin.
"About time," she growls, and pulls Lena into another searing kiss. Kara senses the eyes on them, but doesn't bother to look to see if Lex's is among them.
Screw them, Kara thinks, savoring the taste of Lena's lips and the glide of their tongues together.
Screw them all.
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choccy-milky · 12 hours
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bruh i need to vent about a rude comment i got on my recent chap and also about clora, cuz its something thats been on my mind for a while now. it has spoilers to my most recent chap tho so im putting it below
so in my most recent chap clora gets hit by the killing curse but thanks to seb sacrificing himself for her, it doesn’t work/she survives. and I got a rly rude comment about how that’s super cringe and that clora is a "shoe horning of every possible manifestation of Mary-Sueism I have ever seen." theyre dropping my fic after almost 500k words bc apparently THAT’S where they draw the line and that "just somehow pulling it out the bag and surviving a killing curse from the power of love. In simpler terms, it’s absolutely cringe worthy" and "forgive me if I rolled an eye at the yet again invincible nature of Clora Clemons-the-one-eighth-Veela-extraordinaire"
BUT LIKE LMAO TELL ME U DIDN’T READ/WATCH HARRY POTTER WITHOUT TELLING ME. that’s literally what happens to harry??but its only cringe when it happens to our "mary-sue" clora? like yeah sure love magic might be a bit cringe but IM LITERALLY JUST PULLING FROM THE SOURCE MATERIAL. of all the things to take issue with in my fic and interpretations, theyre taking issue with something that’s canon BAHAHA.
and since im on the topic of clora being mary sue can I just say I hate the misogyny/internalized misogyny that i've seen some people (NOT A LOT, THANKFULLY) treat her with. like i get it, im not pale and blonde and as conventionally pretty as clora is, but even if I was, is that a reason to hate me?? and does being beautiful and well-liked = mary sue? bc as far as I know, mary sue is a chara who is just naturally amazing at everything and doesnt need to try hard and theyre just inexplicably great for no reason (like mc in the base game BAHHAA) if anything the mary sue in MY fic is seb LMAO (but hes a boy so its ok). like clora has worked hard and studied magic all her life due to being a squib and wanting to make up for not being able to DO it. she isnt good at flying, seb is still better at her than duelling, shes really short sighted when it comes to doing/thinking whats best for others and can be a huge idiot.... and like. the only guys that have even shown interest in clora on a real scale have been seb and leander (and then lawley for blackmail purposes, and also bc he hates seb) so its not like literally everyone is falling over themselves for her?? like her interactions with the main cast of boys (ominis, garreth, amit) theyre all indifferent to her LMAO but still, the fact that shes pretty and guys here and there might look at her and go o shes cute! doesnt make her a mary sue SORRy thats just called being attractive idk its just annoying that ppl automatically see a nice kind beautiful female character without any VISIBLE flaws and go SHES TOO PERFECT!! MARY SUE!! WAH IM JEALOUS! and like I get it bc when I was younger I probs would have been annoyed by clora as well due to my own insecurities and internalized misogyny but hey, how about u just realize that’s ur own problem and your own jealousy, and not a real one HAHAH anyway ive since evolved bc I used to be a ‘not like other girls’ type girl back in highschool. trying to be super tomboy-y bc I thought being feminine was cringe and too basic but now ive embraced it and love girly things and dresses and charas like clora who are still strong and showcase their strengths and weaknesses in subtler ways, and I want to smooch her and make out with her. get behind me clora ill protect you🤺🤺🤺
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beomiracles · 2 days
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PRETTY PRINCESS part IIII ─ to find a witch
─ taking a wrong turn in the 4th dimension Beomgyu finds himself two centuries behind his own with no way back, though meeting a pretty princess like you, does not seem so wrong…?
pairings: timetraveler!beomgyu x princess!reader warnings: none
← previous chapter
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Heart beating out of your chest, you rush to enter your bedchambers, someone had been in here, or rather, someone was in here. Upon entering the chambers you’re met with the same small servant from earlier that morning. She was busy tending to your bed as old silk sheets lay discarded on the floor. Beomgyu is nowhere to be seen. 
“What’s the meaning of this?” you ask, making the small servant jump. She turns to you, immediately bowing, “your highness, I was ordered to tend to her highness’s room while she’s present at the banquet”, she doesn’t meet your gaze as it’s sternly glued to the floor. You drag a hand across your face, “and you think to follow through without even clearing things with her highness herself beforehand?”. 
The small servant girl looks down as her bottom lip quivers slightly, “m..my apologies, your highness, for I was only following orders…please do forgive me”. You frown, “who’s orders?”, it wasn’t unusual for servants to come and go in your chambers whether it be to clean or check up on you but they would never come unnannounced. 
“I…I’m not sure, I didn’t exactly recognize him..”, she admits as she gnaws on her fingernails. Sighing, you turn toward the doors, “you’re excused”, the small servant immediately scurries to pick up the dirty sheets as she exits the room without question. 
As the doors close your eyes immediately scan for Beomgyu, where was he? “Beomgyu?” you call out as you open the closet doors, no sight of him, you make your way toward the bathroom, “Beomgyu?”. He’s not in the bathroom either. “Beomgyu?”, you lay flat against the floor to peek under the bed. “Beomgyu where are-”, a groan from the balcony has you rushing to your feet. 
The cool night breeze fans your face as you step out on the large balcony, “...Beomgyu..?”. You frown, you were sure you heard him. “Down here, princess”, his words have your eyes widening as you lean over the railing to find Beomgyu hanging from it, his undying smirk still plastered on his face. 
“Mind giving me a hand?” he asks in a cheerful manner but it’s clear that he’s about to lose his grip and fall victim to the bushes below. “I…how in the world did you end up here?”, you try and reach a hand down toward him. 
Beomgyu scoffs, “ask your little servant that, even had the audacity to open the damn balcony doors”. His hand finds yours in a tight grip, he had nice hands you thought. “Okay, I’ll pull you up now”, you say as your arm works overtime to try and pull him. Beomgyu’s laugh echoes off the castle walls, “I highly doubt that”. 
Despite his words you manage to get him back on safe ground again. As Beomgyu stretches his sore arms you glance toward the balcony doors. “Was there anyone else in the room with the servant?”, Beomgyu shakes his head, “not that I could make out”. 
“It’s odd…they never clean my room in the evenings”, you say as the two of you make your way back into your chamber. Beomgyu flops down on the sofa and drags his hands across his face, “fuck that was scary”, he breathes out. Your brows twitch at his use of profanities but you don’t comment on it as you begin pacing around the room. 
“We have far more grave things to worry about”, you run a hand through your now diffused curls. “I can arrange a carriage, but it won’t take me outside the kingdom…”, you stop and turn toward Beomgyu, “and then there’s you. How can I get you to the carriage unnoticed?”. 
Sitting up slightly, Beomgyu rests his chin on the palm of his hand, “how about…”, he grins, “you smuggle me out in a bag?”. You scoff, “and what makes you think I can get you out on my own”, you say. Rolling your eyes as the sudden idea hits you, making you freeze in your tracks, “I can’t get you out…at least not on my own..”. Your words have Beomgyu frowning, “what’d you mean?”. 
Your eyes travel from him toward the large carrier you used to transport different dresses when you journeyed further trips. Beomgyu follows your gaze and immediately clears his throat, “absolutely not”. 
And that’s how Beomgyu finds himself cramped together in the rather small box, swaying back and forth as the guards carry it, the motions could make anyone seasick. It's only past breakfast time as you make your way down toward the grand foyer, outside waits a carriage, supposedly taking you to your aunt. 
Mrs. Vane anxiously waits below the stairs. “Are you sure you will be alright to travel on your own?”. Nodding, you smile, “I’m sure I shall be quite alright, for it is a short trip”, you try and seize her worries, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. 
“And you’re quite certain you don’t want a few palace guards to accompany you?” she bites her bottom lip nervously. You shake your head, “it will only be troublesome for them to travel back and forth, needn’t to worry about me”. 
Behind you one of the guards groans, you hear their quiet mumbling about how heavy your luggage was. Quickly turning your attention back to Mrs. Vane, you bid her farewell, “I must get going if I seek to arrive by lunch”. 
After letting the guards know that you’d do fine with the heavy carrier in the main compartment of the carriage, you’re leaving the palace behind. Pulling the curtains closed over the small windows as you give the lid a light knock. “You can come out now”, you say and Beomgyu pushes the lid open. 
“Fucking hell that’s tight”, he groans as he climbs out of the small carrier. He sits down in front of you as he massages his neck. Gentle fingers graze his shoulders as you tuck in the collar of his shirt neatly. “The clothes suit you”, you say as you lean back. 
Beomgyu mumbles something about them being ancient as he pulls at the sleeves of the white dress shirt. Ancient or not, there was no doubt that the black trousers complimented his already long legs well, contrasted by the white dress shirt, framing his lean torso nicely. You had managed to gather him some clothes the night before. 
“You need more wardrobe”, you state as Beomgyu shoves his supper down. Frowning he glances up at you, “what’s wrong with my clothes?”, you snort, “the smell”. 
“That’s the smell of a real man, princess”, he grins and you grimace in disgust, “then I shall hope to marry a woman”. Beomgyu rolls his eyes as he sets his empty bowl down, “fine then, what do you suggest I do? try on a dress of yours?”. 
“It would certainly be a sight to see”, you smirk as you walk over to your dresser. Opening it, you’re not surprised when you don’t find anything that would fit him in the slightest. “I could perhaps…”, you draw your bottom lip between your teeth, “maybe go down to the washroom and…just borrow a couple of things”. 
Beomgyu raises an eyebrow, a playful look on his face, “your highness, I didn’t take you for a thief”. Eyes widening at the accusation, you let out a small gasp, “I am certainly not! I shall return them as soon as I’ve sent you off to your own world”. 
“And you think no one’s going to notice the fact that there’s clothes missing?”, he asks to which you confidently cross your arms, “certainly they will notice, however no one would dare suspect the princess of such an act”. 
Beomgyu smirks, “feisty, I like it”. 
You glance out the small carriage window, your surroundings were nothing more but mere vegetation. Large oak trees surrounded your path, you recognized them all, you were still on royal grounds which would take you all the way to your aunt’s house. 
“Now what?” you ask as you give Beomgyu a worried glance. He grins, did he have an endless supply of confidence? “Can you make him stop?” he nods toward the driver. You nod, “I can, but what will you do?” his confidence worried you. 
“You’ll see”, he shrugs, intent on not letting you on to more information than that. Sighing you give the carriage walls a light knock, “sir, may we take a small break? I need to stretch my legs”. 
The carriage slowly comes to a stop and you hear the driver get down to come around and open the door. You glance over at Beomgyu who seems completely relaxed with the situation at hand. 
When the small carriage door squeaks open however he is quick to move. Napkin in one hand he covers the driver’s nose and mouth as the other holds a firm grip on his neck. The driver stumbles backward in surprise and Beomgyu is quick to follow him out of the carriage. 
The driver fights against his grip for another thirty seconds before he passes out. Beomgyu proceeds to gently set him down by the nearest tree before standing up and dusting off his pants and shirt. 
He turns to you with a smirk, “shall we get going, princess?”. Your jaw hangs open in shock and your eyebrows raised to the skies, “what did you do to him?” you ask as Beomgyu climbs up on the driver’s seat. He shrugs, “just put him to sleep, he’ll be awake within the hour”. 
His words did little to soothe you as you glanced toward the now discarded driver, then back at Beomgyu whose hand was extended to you. With your hand in his you let him pull you up beside him. You had never sat here before, your father always insisting that a lady should travel safely inside the carriage. 
Beomgyu turns the reins over in his hands as he studies them with a frown, “do you even know how to drive this?” you ask to which he shakes his head. “But it can’t be that hard”, he says as he gives the horses a quick whip with said reins. The carriage is immediately put in motion and you find yourself gripping onto his arm to steady yourself. “You alright there, princess?” you can practically hear the smirk on his face. 
Ignoring his words you settle back against the carriage, “keep going straight ahead for now”, you instruct and Beomgyu nods, “yes ma’am”. 
The ride is quiet for the next hour, the sound of hooves clattering against the roads and the light squeak of the carriage can be heard. Your mind wanders and you’re filled with worry as you wonder how the news of your disappearance will be received at the castle. The driver surely would have awoken by now. 
You doubt that they would even be able to inform your father, wherever he may be at the moment. But Mrs. Vane, she would be worried sick, maybe you should write her when you arrive? No you couldn’t risk such a thing just to ease your own worries, that would certainly be selfish. 
Your thoughts are interrupted when you suddenly realize that the scenery is new, foreign to you. Sitting up straight you glance around the area, the trees here were darker, taller, and growing a lot closer. You were outside of royal grounds, you almost couldn’t believe it. 
“Stop”, your words surprise yourself as much as they seem to surprise Beomgyu. “Something wrong, princess?” he asks as the carriage comes to an abrupt halt. You don’t reply as you glance around the forest surrounding you. 
Squirrels running along the tree trunks, birds nesting on the largest branches and bunnies digging homes for themselves in the ground. Life here seemed…wild, it felt natural, as if your life in the castle had been a fabricated version created for your safety. 
“Shit, you ain’t lie when you said you’ve never been outside the castle, huh?” Beomgyu’s gaze follows yours. Shaking your head you swallow a deep breath, “no I never…”, you begin but your eyes get stuck on a small deer calf, carefully making its way over the road. It stops in the middle of the path as it looks up at your carriage. Mere seconds later it takes off into the forest again. 
“Where’s her mom?” your thoughts project loudly, Beomgyu remains quiet for a moment, “she’s probably waiting somewhere in the forest”, he frowns, “how do you know it’s she?”. You roll your eyes, “she was too pretty to be a male”, you say and Beomgyu scoffs, “that’s biased logic”. 
You shrug, “perhaps, but it has yet to prove me wrong”, you lean back in your seat once more. “I’ll prove you wrong”, his sudden words have you quirking an eyebrow at him. Beomgyu turns in his seat so that he’s completely facing you, “I’m pretty, aren’t I?”. 
There was no denying that he was. You thought Beomgyu to be one of the most handsome men you’d met, and you had met plenty. His long dark hair shimmered in the small specks of sunlight that crept their way through the trees. Pink dusted lips that would form into the prettiest of pouts whenever he was deep in thought. His dark eyes that always held a mischievous glint and were far too easy to get lost in. 
Though you would rather dance five dances with Mr. Fitz than admitting such a fact to Beomgyu’s face. Truth is you knew nothing of how the ladies of his time looked, but from the way he looked, it was pretty easy to understand that you most likely didn’t stand a chance. 
“I suppose, you’re alright”, you say as you pray your voice presents as nonchalant. Beomgyu grins, “I’ll take the compliment”, he says as he turns back to get the carriage in motion again. 
“How was your banqeull?” he asks, keeping his eyes strained on the road ahead. “You mean the banquet?”, you smile and Beomgyu nods, “yeah that thing”. You bite the inside of your cheek as you recall last night's events, “it was rather dreadful if I’m being honest..” 
Beomgyu’s eyes doesn’t leave the road but you notice a small quirk of his eyebrow as he speaks, “why? wasn’t it practically for you?” His words make you realize that perhaps your wording was quite insensitive, but then again, you hadn’t asked for this banquet, you hadn’t even asked for this life. Though you suppose others have it far worse than yourself, and perhaps it was insensitive to whine over such a thing. 
Your silence had him speak once again, “I think I would find it dreadful too”, he states. “Wearing one of those prison garments around my waist all night and making small talk with old men”, he shrugs. His words manage to bring a small smile to your lips. 
“The corset certainly brings a certain discomfort, but not all the men are old, some are my age too”, you say as your gaze falls on the horses pulling the carriage. Beomgyu is silent for a moment before he speaks, “you found anyone you like yet?”. 
“No”, you sigh, “they’re all dreadfully indifferent”. “You don’t know how many times I’ve had the weather of the coming week told to me in one night”, you exclaim, failing to notice the small smile tugging at Beomgyu’s lips. 
“I could tell you the weather two hundred years from now if you so wished”, he smirked, “bet none of those men can”. You roll your eyes despite the smile playing on your lips, “I fear you put them at a great disadvantage”. 
Beomgyu glances at you, his gaze lingering for longer than a moment before returning to the road, “don’t know what you’re talking about, princess”. 
The sun has already begun to set as the carriage leaves the main road and travels off to a smaller and narrower path. The trees grow higher, closer, darker. The air shifts from a warm night breeze to a cold frosty one, it makes you shiver. 
“We should be there soon”, you comment as you glance toward Beomgyu, his gaze fixed on the road as he leads the horses carefully through the narrow path. The carriage squeaks and rattles behind you in a most unsettling way. 
You pull your bare arms around yourself in an attempt to warm up. The thought of not making it to the witch’s house before dark made you uneasy as every turn only led you to more trees and you dwelled deeper into the forest. 
An arm wraps around your figure, making you jump slightly. “Shoulda brought a jacket, princess”, Beomgyu says as his hand rubs your forearm. Wide eyes travel from his hand on your arm, to his face, he looks as if nothing, eyes focused on something far in the distance. 
“That it?” he asks as a small house comes into vision. You follow his gaze, the cottage was old and worn down. The windowsills had lost almost all of its blues and vines climbed their way along the cobbled stoned walls. The garden was overgrown and the once small sign was barely readable. Yet you could make out the small font, “Endora Wright”, engraved in the peeled wood. 
Taking in a deep breath you nod, “indeed it is, now we’re just missing the witch herself”.
A/N ─ hiii! this chapter is a lot shorter, I apologise but I want the next chapter to be centred around the witch's hut and the events taking place there, hence the abrupt ending!
→ want to get notified whenever a new dream is published? join my TAGLIST ★ all rights reserved ─ @beomiracles 2024
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beenbaanbuun · 1 day
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heyy
can i request pet playing with hongjoong? reader as a fox girly type of thing heheh
thank youuu
no because i can see him being so into this whenever you misbehave… like all you need to do is look at him the wrong way and he’s cocking a brow at you, asking whether he needs to get your collar.
before you can even answer, though, he has a hand on your shoulder, slowly guiding you to your knees. you’re more than willing to let yourself topple against the plush rug. it hurts, carpet burning your knees slightly when you land, but you keep your mouth shut. hongjoong has threatened to muzzle you before; you don’t doubt that he’d actually do it. especially if you started complaining about useless things.
“cub thinks she can disobey her master, does she?” he fixes you with a harsh look before spinning to grab what he needs from the bedside drawer. the red collar gets thrown against the mattress, quickly joined by your leash and then your plug. the orange fur of the tail always looks so silky, but you’ve never felt it except for when it’s brushing teasingly against your thighs. foxes don’t have hands, after all.
he shuts the drawer, thankfully not bothering to grab the gag. it surprises you, really; after being a brat and talking back all day, you half expect him to want nothing more than to shut you up now. perhaps he wants to hear you beg for your punishment—that’s always a favourite of his—or maybe he just wants to see how far you’ll push it. you really wouldn’t be surprised if that was the case. he quite often likes to see how far you’ll go until your punishment finally breaks you and shuts you up.
not today though. today you don’t feel like talking back as an attempt to rile hongjoong up. today you just want to be his good little cub. no more being a brat and talking back to him, no pushing him to see just how mad you can make him, no pushing yourself to see just how much punishment you can take before you roll over and submit. you’re going to be a well behaved little fox cub and take your punishment like a good girl.
“nothing to say, pup?” he quirks a brow as he rests the red leather band against your throat and fastens it at your nape. soft fingers run across it, admiring how the colour sits prettily against your skin. they land on the name tag for a second, slipping into the d-ring that holds it and giving it a gentle tug. not even a squeak leaves you lips; hongjoong hums in approval. “so you’re being a good little pet for once, are you? finally learnt that good little pets don’t talk unless they’re told to?” he delivers another tug to the ring before letting it go.
“good pup.”
he grabs the leash next, swinging it around in his hands nonchalantly, as if it’s nothing in his hands. its not nothing, though. it’s everything. it solidifies your place beneath him, as a pet... his pet.
you hold your chin up, giving him space to attach the leash to the d-ring. he does so with a grin, mumbling to himself about how he’s so lucky to have such an obedient little fox. how he wishes you were always so well behaved for him. how much nicer he’d be if you didn’t insist on pushing his buttons so much. you sit and listen to it all, soaking in whatever praise you can get from his monologue.
finally, with your leash still in the palm of his hand, he turns to grab the tail. the final piece to solidify your rank as pet and nothing more. you hadn’t noticed him take the bottle of lube out of the drawer, yet he holds it in his hand. the sound of it being uncapped rings around the room, and the sickly strawberry scent clings to the air as he squirts a generous amount onto the bulbous head of the plug. he smears it round with a smirk, and without a word from him, you turn to present yourself. face down, pressed against the rough texture of the rug, ass up, your puckered hole barely covered by the thin fabric of your pyjama shorts.
“such a good pup, today,” hongjoong hums as he yanks down your shorts and wastes no time in pressing a lubed up finger to your hole. you suck in a breath as it breaches the muscle pushing deeper into you to stretch you out. “such a shame i still have to knock you down a peg or two, hm? a little good behaviour now doesn’t take away from the fact that you’re nothing more than a brat.”
you whimper as he inserts a second finger, pushing it in until his knuckles are brushing against your cheeks. he scissors them, opening you up. it’s uncomfortable, but not unfamiliar.
“but don’t worry, pretty vixen,” he muses as he fingers you open, “if you’re good, no doubt i’ll let you be my little lap dog when we’re finished.”
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LAES SPOILERS AHEAD
So I just finished catching up on all the recent episodes and OH MY GOD DO I HAVE THOUGHTS (specifically about Eclipse and the newest laes episode because holy hell I’m reeling from it)
In the second half of the “HOW TO DEAL With The GRIEF of Losing SOLAR” episode on the laes after Monty leaves and Eclipse appears, I was very much expecting him to make his usual snarky remarks and mock Earth and Solar’s death in some way (though I was hoping he wouldn’t ofc)
Imagine my shock when he does none of those things and instead is much more mellow and even softer/nicer—by his standards at least—and just looks around briefly and asks questions and just stands and actually LISTENS to what Earth says with barley if any semblance of his usual snark. The fact that he actually lets her talk about her feelings and everything and rant without cutting in to be his usual snarky self is EVERYTHING TO ME.
AND WHATS EVEN MORE; the fact that he asked her “do you really need him (Solar)” and when she said “yes” he didn’t say anything and just sighed as if in defeat. I think we all knew before from the previous episodes that he was battling with wether to actually help aid in bringing Solar back or not after his encounters with Puppet and Frank, but it seems to me that with this scene with him and Earth AND how it was mentioned by Sun that he was wiping the floor in Sun’s and Moon’s house that he has maybe decided that he IS going to help, or at least is reasoning with himself as to if he should or not.
With all the questions he was asking Earth it makes me think the ladder is true.
I also love the fact that despite her still very much grieving and breaking down at the loss of Solar (as we all are), she still expressed sympathy towards Eclipse and him not having anybody to lean on nor him being able to understand that kind of bond or trust. Even with this is brought up Eclipse just…kind of agrees to some of it and then deflects as usual but one thing caught my attention when he said “it looks like you need it (sympathy) more than I do anyways” and though he doesn’t directly offer it, I think the fact that he just stays there for a bit to listen to her and maybe even take in her opinions and feelings towards Solar and Ruin into consideration for whatever he’s planning to do is his own way—however unintentional it may be—of offering his own small bit of support. Hell, he definitely got Earth to talk a bit more about what she was feeling in regards to the situation and Solar.
Hate him all you want, everyone is inclined to their own opinions ofc, but Eclipse was so different from how he usually is this episode and I think things have slowly been changing for him for awhile. Before it was almost certain that when this was all over that he’d be dead in an instant without a thought…but now? Now I don’t think that’s going to be his fate anymore, and this and other recent episodes have only proved that to me.
He actually listened to Moon about not killing Ruin, he is obviously at least considering in helping to bring back Solar if what he did at Sun’s and Moon’s house and the questions he asked Earth are any indication, and the way he was just willing to stand there and just listen to Earth with barely if any a hint of his usual attitude and hold a rather peaceful conversation with her and even be quite NICE about it by his standards.
I think wholeheartedly that Eclipse is improving steadily and slowly and I am very much manifesting not only a redemption arc but a friendship between him and Earth because so far she has been one of the most sympathetic and in some capacity caring of him and the borderline softness he showed today only brings my hopes up.
Okay rant over, I just really needed to put my thoughts out there because damn is my brain reeling with so many thoughts and feelings about this
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why do you think alicent loves aemond so much? why she doesn't love aegon as much as she loves aemond? alicent appears to have misconceptions about her children. just like dumbledore said to snape about harry. you see what you want to see. the thing is alicent overlooks aegon good traits like cunning (he convinced people living for years at dragonstone to follow him without bloodshed so it means he convinced them. it means aegon is far more diplomatic than aemond even though aemond brags about studying history and philosophy so one can expect aemond to be more polished snd diplomatic but all his knowledge goes out of the window when he's angry) and resourceful while she is too preoccupied with aemond not causing problems compared to aegon that she paints aemond as unproblematic golden child. this and aemond actually never comes back. aegon does. alicent was so wrong about both of her children. had alicent really understood aemond she would have never loved him that much because he represents everything she despises thirst for blood, war and violence. she just likes her men strong, not self-pitying like aegon because he reminds her of herself. had she really understood aegon she would have loved him more because they are very similar doing their duty and fighting till the end. she hated parts of aegon she hated in herself and loved parts of aemond she loved in herself.
this is very funny old joke that the child who rebels the most often ends up as the one more successful than obedient dutiful one.
Hello, thank you for the ask! And I`m awfully sorry for the delay with answering:(
Well, in a way you answered your own question. "she hated parts of aegon she hated in herself and loved parts of aemond she loved in herself" - there is quite a lot of truth to it, I think. However, I do not agree with the premise that Alicent doesn`t love Aegon (or, more precisely, that she loves him less than she does Aemond).
In fact I find it quite difficult to say which one of her sons, in my opinion, Alicent loves more - because she loves them in different ways.
She sees Aemond as a pillar she could lean on (just like she views Criston), as a shield she could grab to protect herself and the rest of her family (not in a sense that she`s ready to sacrifice Aemond but meaning that shes sure he can take it). There IS a part of Alicent that lives in her second son (in one of my posts I called him the voice of her bitterness and rage) but overall they are quite different people. She might not understand Aemond as well as she would like to; she might love him less if she did - but we will never know. As it is, Aemond is her brave and fierce baby boy who went through a horrible traumatic experience (that started with him fighting alone) and still was strong enough to be the one to stand by her side when pretty much everyone else turned against her.
Aegon indeed too strongly reminds Alicent of herself. She feels it - and since she is often too harsh and demanding (sometimes even resentful) towards herself, she projects these feelings onto her child that resembles her the most. She might feel like she is not enough (screw you, Viserys, by the way) - so Aegon does not feel enough as well. There might be some apprehension about the way Aegon deals with his suffering: drinking, whoring, lazing around - trying to drown out the voice of his suffering with other powerful sensations and feelings where Alicent (almost) always chooses to suppress them. But that doesn`t mean she doesn`t love Aegon. In a way thinking about him - about his lot, his duty-bound fate, the neglect he suffers where the support should be given to him - hurts her too much, so she can`t fully process the love she feels for her eldest son, and neither she can express her properly. So here go slapping, shouting and saying the words that she knows will hurt a lot - but she can`t stop herself from saying them.
Her love for Aemond makes her feel stronger. Her love for Aegon makes her bleed. So no wonder Alicent feels more ready to embrace the former. And yet, when she takes a stand between Aegon and Meleys none of it matters.
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lovinglin · 3 months
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My best bet in lore posting is if I just don't think abt it too much
#aka lemme just ramble without thought. don't mind how messy my thoughts might get here#♥️ we're going overdrive!#< it's abt them. anyway#do u think he'd feel guilty the first few months of them being together?#bc there's a part of him that's happy and thankful for being with someone so wonderful yet he can't help but feel guilt over subjecting her#-into his problems? like the restless/sleepless nights and the nightmares and the breakdowns and the accidents where he hurts her?#he knows he's not perfect. not every relationship is perfect at all. but sometimes he feels like he's too far gone to be “fixed” anymore#that this is how he's grown to survive and it'll always stay that way. there's so much learning and unlearning to do#he's probably really thankful she's so patient though. even through everything. she always keeps saying they'll make things work#his tendencies and problems are a lot more visible- they show more easily through his actions and his words. and she works and adjust to-#-that in whatever way she can. but then what about her? when you turn to her- it almost looks like she doesn't have problems at all#but she does. and maybe her silence in itself is a problem#maybe her hurt is more quiet. more discreet. more subtle and less obvious. but that doesn't mean it's not there#maybe it's the distant stares or her lack of input. or the inconsistent meals or how tired she can get#she does get nightmares too. but maybe it's more of how she's already crying and hesitating to wake him up because she knows he doesn't get#-enough sleep as it is and she doesn't wanna pile onto him with her problems#maybe it's the self-isolation of locking herself in the bathroom and wanting to claw at her skin because of how uncomfortable she feels#the phantom pains on her back and the times she doesn't want to be touched because it's a level of discomfort that she can't describe#and it hurts just as badly for him because he Doesn't Know what to do. other than stay at a distance and use his words#hm. I dunno. these two just has me thinking a lot
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months
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This might not be anything, but while writing about your fics, the way you have the characters' mannerisms down PERFECTLY got me thinking about mirroring...
There's a lot of it in 7 (Horii is a directorial genius etc etc), most of it more intentional than these probably are, but there's something so interesting about mirroring that takes the tone of a (relatively) fond memory, a familiar gesture, and inverts it in the way shown here.
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OH I'M GLAD YOU'VE NOTICED THESE TOO I think I mentioned it months back (or I drafted a post 'bout it but didn't think it was anything noteworthy) but I always really did like how the Arakawa Family mimicked each other's mannerisms (also circling back to how Jo and Masato calling Ichiban 'Ichi' presumably after picking it up from Arakawa)!
Aoki actually does the same sitting gesture too! I went back to double check and skim through the rest of the game's cutscenes, and as far as I could tell unless I skipped a scene, it really is only these three that do this specific pose:
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It's such a small detail but I love it immensely and it really does highlight their connections with each other and it drives me insane
#snap chats#the fact aoki holds his left fist with his right like jo..... im gonna be sick... (crying)#potential hints that aoki really does favor jo and/or spends more time with him... or i might be delirious. could be both even..#focusing on how jo mimics arakawa though i dont think i have to say i love how it is inverted intention wise#like of course in arakawa's situations he's in a position where he's helping ichi and speaking calmly with him#while with jo Evidently each interaction is more tense and antagonistic#really is a cool way to emphasize that whole 'step parent' angle if that makes sense#OH BUT THANK YOU ON MY WRITING that's a huge compliment: i'm glad you think i have their mannerisms down !#accuracy is a big thing to me... in case we haven't picked that up yet.... i should relax a little tbh--#BUT i'd like to think my brain's good at visualizing things and i think i've 'studied' enough to get an acceptable result in what i show#it's like... if i can't see it in my head clearly or it doesn't look right then i wanna keep trying until it DOES look right yk#dont want a Hello Kitty Wouldnt Do Xanax moment... only on occasion.... a lil xanax wouldnt hurt as long as its not too far gone ☠️#alright im. DELIRIOUS.#to end this off i watched the first episode of Sailor Suit and Machine Gun !#my japanese is. HORRENDOUS BUT the art of inference and context clues and stray knowledge got me through it#i'm excited to watch the next episode even if i'm only really getting half the impact from the dialogue#BUT THE FEELING'S THERE... the emotion's there#embarrassingly i almost cried when izumi was crying in the theater over her dad while she was eating cause like Girl Me Too ☠️☠️#ill go one day without mentioning my dad i promise... todays not that day tho ☠️#IN ANY CASE. thank you for droppin the episodes on me !! i can't stress never tiring of having new things to watch#ill watch the next episode tonight probably. i was gonna go out to get lunch buuuut my moms home#so there goes that plan.. at least my bro got me food while /he/ went out today lmao
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crows as song lyrics pt. 1
Kaz: If clarity's in death why won't this die?/ Years of tearing down our banners you and I/ living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts/ Give me back my girlhood it was mine first
Inej: And you know that I'd swing with you for the fences/ Sit with you in the trenches/ Give you my wild, give you a child/ Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other
Jesper: Time won't fly, its like I'm paralyzed by it/ Just want to be my old self again/ But I'm still trying to find it
Wylan: You can let it go/ You can throw a party full of everyone you know/ You can start a family full of everyone you love/ You don't have to be sorry for leaving and growing up
Nina: What should be burrowed under my skin/ in heart-stopping waves of hurt/ I've come too far to watch some name-dropping sleaze/ tell my what are my words worth
Matthias: All of my past, I tried to erase it/ But now I see would I even change it/ Might share a face and share a last name/ but we are not the same
read tags for reasoning
#alright time to get deep and emotional#I think this lyric from Would've Could've Should've represents Kaz because it shows Kaz's ongoing conflict with Pekka and how Kaz has#basically lived only to get revenge on Pekka. All he wants really wants is his brother and childhood back and the only way he knows how to#is to take Pekka Rollins down. Kaz has to learn to let go of his obsession with Pekka and learn to move on.#Peace by Taylor Swift represents Inej because it shows how in love Inej is with Kaz and everything she does for him. It shows everything#she would do for him if he could get over his trauma and put in equal effort for her.#This lyric from All Too Well reminds me of Jesper because since leaving a wonderful home with a good family Jesper has become a theif#and gambler. He wants to be his old self but he's too far gone and now he needs to find a way to live mixing his old and new life and#learning to find happiness and what he has now.#Matilda by Harry Styles is perfect for Wylan because it shows how he can let go of his past and is allowed to be happy with his newfound#family of the crows. Wylan doesn't have to be sorry about what happened to his father or ashamed. He's allowed to feel happy and loved.#The Lakes by Taylor Swift reminds me of Nina because Nina faces a lot of disgust and shame for falling in love with a fjerdan but she#doesn't care about what everyone says about her. She feels entitled to her love with Matthias and is ready to begin a new life where she#loves him without guilt.#This lyric from Family Line by Conan Gray is representative of Matthias learning that Fjerda and the Druskelle do not define who he is.#Even though Matthias will always be branded by his past he knows he is not defined by his past and is not the same as he was before.#anyway thanks for coming to my tedtalk#six of crows#kaz brekker#wylan van eck#inej ghafa#jesper fahey#nina zenik#freddy carter#matthias helvar#shadow and bone#taylor swift#conan gray#harry styles#dree's posts
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genreawareness · 2 years
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“the three of us have a very important job.” “>:) to find out which us presidents were secretly gay” “No.” “ok fine, bi”
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7-oh-ta1 · 2 years
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The other day I commented on a 3H tiktok I didn't agree with bec I actually DID agree a bit just not completely, and promptly found out op was a dimitri stan twitter user whose never played any other fire emblem so they thought Edelgard was complete evil with no critical thinking skills and I blocked them so fast so I would never unknowingly interact with them again. So here's me speaking out into the void that I don't think Edelgard is pure evil and I think Dimitri is fail cringe.
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#lindsay speaks#fe: three houses#it's so funny bec ppl like that op will be like edelgard is EVIL bec no life is a worthy cost of change (fair) but it's okay when dimitri#slaughtered ppl regardless of whether they had anything to do with him bec he has trauma 🥺🥺 (unfair)#like yes queen he does have trauma & what happened to him was horrible but you know what? edelgard also has trauma & what happened to her#was horrible. it's okay when dimitri wanders the countryside killing ppl without purpose but when edelgard kills those aligned with the#church then she's gone too far. at least edelgard is doing the wrong thing with good intentions. dimitri is completely unable to look#outside himself. recall him leading the army to enbarr instead of saving his people in HIS capital who desperately needed him bec he didn't#CARE about them. at least every horrible thing edelgard does she does in the name of crafting a better future for OTHER people. commoners#specifically. and I'm not saying dimitri is a bad character i actually think he's a good one. but it's SO UNFAIR to make excuses for HIM#doing HORRIBLE things and never acknowledging what he has done while at the same time condemning edelgard to being#completely irredeemable trash for the same if not better motives.#just say you hate to see a bisexual emperor woman winning and go drool over your str8 white man 🙄✋️ /hj#the way black eagles isn't even my main route i just get sick of seeing the double standard for my girl edie#honestly edelgard was slaying. dimitri would've snapped in 5 seconds in her boots 💅
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balteus · 2 years
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yea actually i think the author of raybearer is bent on messing with me specifically
#redemptors are sent every year or every hundred years which is it. how is yui alive if this was 100 years ago. organ death and poisoning#are the same cause of death. on the other hand death from falling isn't specified despite it being distinct from the others and the prince#claiming he is immune to it#CONSTANT TIME SKIPS. WHY#worst offender of show don't tell I've seen in a while. please let us see sanjeet nighmares instead of simply telling us about him#tell me more about maya she's the best character and only had 2 lines so far which is a crims#the entire bit of mc erasing her own memories was so not thought out. you immediately know what's going to happen there's 0 stakes here#how come everyone acts normal after she does this despite them calling medics just seconds earlier? how come she doesn't get her memories#back when she touches sanjeet?#raybearer has SUCH good worldbuilding concepts it's a shame they're so crudely explored#there's not a single character which talks normally. ifueko i promise you you can do foreshadowing without shoving it in oops didn't mean#to say that style dialogue#this book would be so much better if it was 2 or 3 books instead. tarisai growing up and her travel to the capital. exploring places she#was walled off from in her isolation. meeting kirah before and bonding with her. exploration of lodestones and magic systems#more kathleen and the redemptor. the author actually has no excuse to simply not have done this#because we KNOW tarisah can erase her own memories and would pass the test#AND THEN the second book about the trials living with dayo meeting sanjeet and fleshing out other anointed. perhaps finishing in her#regaining her memories and choosing to save dayo despite everything or at some point after the even im currently reading abt#which is abi demons escaping the temple#anyway! sorry for the long tags but i was so hyped about this book when i heard abt the main character being able to steal memories and#a plot point that happens later on
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arolesbianism · 18 days
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Why must I only be capable of coming up with cool art ideas long past midnight
#rat rambles#Ive been thinking abt hypothetical olivia jackie very very loose roleswap au and its just more doomed toxic yuri#itd just be jackie rapidly spiraling and doing stupid shit behind olivias backas olivia becomes more and more emotionally distant#jackie has this fun habit called self sabotaging in such a way that savotages everyone around her as well but way worse#and olivia has this fun habit called not noticing growing jackie problems until its too late#so all in all we get a less terrible gravitas (key word less Im not going to give olivia That much credit) and a far more unstable jackie#and that's saying a lot lol#jackie on her way to become the worlds worst lebian incel unethical scientiwait no thats already canon jackie post cancelled#you see this is why canon jackie is doomed to be worse than any bullshit I could pull off in a swap au because canon jackie has power#but it still is interesting thinking abt how gravitas would differ if primarily ran by olivia instead of jackie#mainly the big thing is that I dont think olivia would do a great job at noticing any decline in employee health being more distant from it#not deliberately so like jackie like olivia would still Try to build a good work environment I just dont know if shed do that good a job#I also feel like shed be equally hard to talk down from a potentially problematic project as jackie if she believed in it enough#olivia is proud of the work that she does and while she has better morals than jackie they still arent exactly ironclad#she and jackie both being self righteous is smth they have in common it just happens that olivia is usually in the right#but that's with the two of them theres plenty of other situations where olivia could easily be on the other end of the argument#which is why director olivia facinates me as a concept because it begs the question of how well could she manage to maintain her morals#she obviously Wants to maintain good morals but when in a position of power where her word always goes through would that falter at all?#maybe without even realizing its happening#youve made hard decisions before. what makes this different from the rest? maybe at some point it wont even feel difficult anymore#and maybe this in turn makes it harder for her to see the blood jackie tries to hide#because if she let herself notice that itd be impossible to ignore the blood on her own hands#meanwhile jackie is just being like maybe shell text me back if I keep breaking her trust itll work this time trust me#and then she proceeds to explode her brain or smth and gets printing podded and explodes again because shes somehow manage it#I just would want all three aus to be olivia having serious identity crisies while jackie reenacts ashfur amvs in the background
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