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#elves are human as well mind you
foone · 5 months
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Bad idea: Age gap discourse but in a fantasy land where there's multiple races who have vastly different lifespans and life styles.
Is it wrong for a 27 year old human to date a 140 year old stone elf, considering most stone elves don't get out of diapers till their 30s?
Is it wrong for a 80 year old dwarf to date a two year old fire wisp, when fire wisps only live up to 5 years (between the eruptions) and have memories of their past lives, so in a way they're "born" at age 400,000+? That octogenarian dwarf is way younger than the fire wisp that's only physically younger than some of the socks the dwarf has!
Is it wrong for a chronomancer who was never born to date, well, anyone? They are zero years old and infinity years old and negative one hundred and seventeen years old all at once. They look like an old human, sure, with the long white beard and the wrinkly skin, but as far as anyone can tell, they've always looked like that. We've seen the cave paintings.
Is it wrong for a 30 year old lizardman (that's old in lizardman years) to date a human who is 60 years old in biological years (because of aging spells), 26 years old in lived-experience years, but only 13 years old in calendar years? (ie, they were born 13 years ago, but spent some of that time in sideways timelines, so they've lived more years than have passed in their home timeline?)
Is it wrong for a 12,000 year old dragon date a pile of 400 kobolds when kobolds only live like 10 years on average, but reach full maturity in one year? And if you disagree, can you do anything about it? You do know what happened to the last policeman who tried to arrest a dragon, right? Their city is still smoldering, 50 years later.
Is it wrong for anyone to date the time worm? It's the same age, every year. So the age gap can only intensify. If you start dating the time worm when you're both the same age, when do you break it off because you've become too much older than them?
And most confusing of all... What about the fairies? They could be anything between a thousand and a day old, they would lie about their age either way, and they can look like whatever they want. There's fairies we know for a fact have been around since the founding of The City of Towers, who met the silent mother herself, and also look like they're at most ten years old. Is it wrong to date them, or just really uncomfortable for everyone who sees it? And on the other side there's fairies who are "born" (hatched? They come from plants, I'm not sure what the verb even would be. Seeded? Sprouted, maybe) this week who are already appearing like middle-aged men and dancing with widows in what looks like a scheme to run off with her fortune but they never take the money, because what would a fairy want with worthless metal discs? Maybe fairies have a hive mind or genetic memory or reincarnation with full memories, they'd never tell you or give you a straight (or consistent) answer anyway.
Stonefolk are really the only inter-race dating situation anyone can agree on. They're unthinking & unmoving solid rock during the day, so those hours don't count. Thus their "real age" is a nice even half of their true age. So if you meet a stonefolk who was dug out 30 years ago, watch out: that's a 15 year old, and if you're a 25 year human, that's too young for you, even though their dig-date is five years before your birth-date.
EDIT: 2024/01/12: Changed the name of the Stonefolk
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monsterblogging · 1 month
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"I know JK Rowing is a terrible person but her books are so good-"
You sure about that?
I mean, just for a start, have you taken a good look at her fantasy creatures lately? A whole bunch of them are straight-up based on malicious and dehumanizing stereotypes about actual people.
Remember the werewolves? And being a werewolf was made into a kind of metaphor for having AIDS?
And you know how AIDS was first associated with gay men? And how conservatives back in the day were claiming gay men were preying on children in order to convert them to gayness?
Remember how Fenrir Greyback preyed on children in particular? Yeah, she put that subtext in there. She was an adult in the 90's. She knew damn well what she was doing.
Remember the house elves? Remember how most of them loved to serve and needed to have a home and a master or else they just wouldn't know what to do with themselves?
Did you know that's literally what slavers in the American South said about the Black people they kept enslaved? Go look up the happy slave myth.
Do I even need to get into the goblins and the antisemitic tropes they're based on? No, folkloric goblins were not gold-hoarding bankers waiting for their chance to stab humanity in the back.
"But the characters are so good!"
Are you kidding me?
Most of her characters are pretty one-dimensional, including Harry. Her idea of making a morally complicated character is giving a tragic past to a bully. Numerous characters are little more than stereotypes. (Looking at Fleur right now.) Literally anybody, including you, can easily make dozens of characters just as good, if not better. (It doesn't exactly take a lot of character designing skill to go, "hey, actually, having a sad backstory doesn't make it okay to bully children" or "hey, maybe I should not base a character on the first stereotype that pops into my head.")
"But the rest of the worldbuilding!"
Sorry, but her worldbuilding is just as basic as her characters. Magical castles and secret passages are stock tropes. Magical people who keep their true nature secret from humanity is the premise of pretty much every White Wolf TTRPG. Most of her fantasy creatures are just common European fairy tale and folklore creatures with shitty stereotypes projected onto them.
I'm not saying "basic worldbuilding bad." I'm saying, you could do just as good, if not better, with minimal effort.
Also there's her magical bioessentialism, where only Harry's abusive blood relatives could provide him with supernatural protection from Voldemort. Rowling thus effectively declared that non-biological family isn't quite real family, and that abusive biofamily can give you some essential thing that a loving, supportive family that isn't related to you just can't.
The Hogwarts houses are one of the most insidious elements of her worldbuilding. The idea of being sorted gives you a little dopamine hit because wow now you have a li'l niche where you belong!
But the actual function of the houses and sorting system and the House Cup is teaching children to see each other as rivals, and ensure that the most toxic views of the upper class get passed on to every new batch of kids sorted into Slytherin.
Hogwarts effectively prepares children for a dystopia where magic serves to distract its citizens from how nightmarishly awful it is. Economic inequality is so bad that people like Arthur and Molly Weasley can barely afford to put their kids through school, casual sadism is just an accepted norm in everyday society, and non-humans are second class citizens. Rowling sorta acts like she thinks this is a bad thing with certain lines she gave to Dumbledore, but in the end, her special boy protagonist becomes an auror; IE, a defender of the status quo. So.
If you've never seen it, Lily Simpson's video goes into even more detail on how the worldbuilding of Harry Potter is actually incredibly fucked up, and how it betrays small-minded attitudes on Rowling's part. There's no separating the art from this artist, because Rowling's rotten values pour out of nearly every page.
youtube
Yes, there are many things in Harry Potter that evoke feelings and inspire people, but there's absolutely nothing in it that this series has a monopoly on. You can find those same experiences in much, much better media.
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Something I think about all the time is the amount of trauma Kabru experienced during Utaya, but also after. He literally had to be dragged away from his dead mother and then was brought to live in a foreign country with an elf who raised kids for fun. I'm not saying Milsiril was malicious, but imagine the cultural and emotional shock. He had nothing. Everyone and everything he'd ever known was permanently wiped off the face of the earth. Did he even get to have a funeral for his mother?
Milsiril was very reassuring with him and tried to raise him well. She absolutely did make an effort to be a good adoptive mother, but there's such a jarring disconnect between them because of the nature of the relationship. She did not understand his culture at all but also she could not understand him as a human. She babied him too long and the way she acted around him solidified the idea in his mind that there would never be mutual understanding between elves and humans. Like if you can't truly connect to a parent, what kind of impact would that have on a growing child? Even now she still treats him like a baby, how can you ever recover from trauma properly if you're never seen as anything but a crying child?
I think the theme of alienation is so strong in Kabru's character and the way he tries to make everyone like and trust him speaks to his inability to feel understood
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comicaurora · 3 months
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In your asks and other outside-of-comic statements, you seem to draw on parallels to programming a lot when talking about lacrimas.
And this makes me think as a programmer: the primordial rules that are used in Auroras to do magic and lacrimas are part of the primordial language. You are literally telling the primordial's dead bodies what to do, and they obey.
Yet, the difference that comes to my mind is that Primordial was at one point a language actually spoken. Used to communicate in day-to-day life by normal sentient beings. That's quite different from programming languages, which aren't meant to be talked in at all, and are built from the ground up purely to convey a series of precise instructions. They're very formalised and structured. There are no synonyms, no double meanings, no altering of word order, no redundant information etc. It's extremely rigid, much unlike languages people actually talk in, for which a degree of fluidity and ambiguity is essential.
And in Aurora it would seem the latter is being used as the former.
Have you ever thought about this tension/contradiction/conflict? How it affects the world, how it affects your writing, etc?
Or has this distinction never crossed your mind?
Or was this something you have noticed, but never really had the right knowledge to engage with much?
Or any other thoughts on the subject, really
So! This is an interesting thing I have actually thought about.
When the Elder Races were first created, they were born knowing and speaking a language innovatively called the First Language. Every new Young Race is also initially created speaking this language. The language then drifts over the generations, developing into regional dialects and then into separate linguistic descendants if given enough time.
The Ancients spoke a close descendent of the First Language for most of their time in existence, and made a writing system of their own very early on, which has no innate power. But in the early days of the world, the generally accepted story is that a god granted the three elder races knowledge of the written Runic language, which could command the elements. The Ancients acquired it late and used it very sparingly, only for the programming of lacrimas, but for the Elves and Humans living in the depths of the Caves, this was their first and primary writing system. It's even possible that a rare cave-dweller brave enough to venture to the surface was the one who taught the Ancients these runes in the first place.
It's posed an obvious question, of course. Why does this one specific form of writing manifest as a language of magic? Why can it command the dead Primordials? Why is it so well-suited to the phonemes of the First Language that every child of this world is created speaking?
The predominant theory - and, with two living primordials to check with, one which is potentially on the cusp of being proven - is that the First Language and its runic writing system are the language that the Primordials spoke. Its words, written or spoken, can be understood by the remnants of thought that still linger in the sleeping, dead-but-not-entirely-gone primordials that make up the world.
Primordial magic is different from programming in one key way: real computers are entirely unthinking entities. They are not in any way smart - not even smart enough to be stupid. A computer parsing a program cannot observe a missing parentheses and compensate like a human could do in their sleep - it simply fails to parse, because the mathematics don't work out.
Magic in this world is like what every programmer wishes programming could be. Tell the computer what to do, and it might be a little confused, but it'll get the gist. Tell Fire to burn in this direction - Fire, even if it's just running on an echo of a seven-thousand-year-old memory, knows what that means. Tell the wind to printf this statement to this recipient, it'll try to find them and send the message. Tell Life to make this body do what it's doing faster, it can do that. It's simple executions of simple commands, almost reflexive - things that require no complex higher thought from a being that is no longer alive enough to have them. They're not as unthinking as computers, and that means the nuances of language can actually have an effect on them. Some mages think more poetic and emotionally-charged spell invocations can lead to better, more efficient results - an appeal to a long-dead emotion might be easier for the Primordial to execute than an appeal to a half-forgotten complex thought.
When a mage takes direct control of a magical energy and funnels it into an elemental effect, their own higher thought allows the element to do more complicated things - Fire can't transmute on its own like it could when it was alive, but it can when bent to a mortal will. No need to translate a spell into the language of magic when the mage can simply use their own mind to shape the effect. This is the primary advantage mages have over lacrima-users - flexibility, complexity, and speed.
Another interesting factor. Alinua's dynamic with Life demonstrates what a living Primordial's living thought can do when in the hands of a mortal. A normal, simple healing spell cast by anybody but her just accelerates a body's own healing, but with Alinua's guidance steadying Life's hand, they can do much more complicated things of her own free will - things Life knows how to do that no mage knows how to command her to do.
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leighsartworks216 · 7 months
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Might I request an enemies to friends to lovers with Astarion?
THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A QUICK LITTLE DRABBLE. IT IS ALMOST 4K WORDS. It also became a songfic. The song is "Your Stupid Face" by Kaden MacKay
Also it is 11:20. I am so tired. I do not have the energy to proofread this rn. So it's as good as it's gonna get
Warnings: self-doubt, bickering
Word Count: 3,957
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I just really hate your face
Though I know that won't surprise you
But, to me, your skin is one giant wart
And your laugh's one big snort
And you stink, so in short
I despise you
You disgrace the human race
'Cause you're more of a mosquito
I would rather have the dentist and drill
Then this swine in the swill
And if you were a bill, I would veto
And if the world was perfect, you would be gone without a trace
But since the world could never be that great
I'll just hate your stupid face
-
Astarion sighed just behind you. You glared over your shoulder at him. Did he really have to be so annoying when you were trying to help? What did he have against doing the right thing?! Or were all high elves as up their asses as him?
The little girl glanced nervously between you, her hands fiddling anxiously with each other. “I-Is that alright?”
You turned back to her with a big smile, though Astarion could see the strain behind it. “Of course! It’s no problem. We’ll find your toy and bring it back before nightfall, how’s that sound?”
“Really?!” Her eyes became wide and excited, bouncing on her feet like there were hot coals beneath it. “Thank you so much!”
You watched as she ran off back to her mother, jumping as she grabbed the woman’s arm and pointed at you. You smiled, genuine this time, and waved to them both. Then, you turned to go back into the woods.
The joy didn’t last long.
“I thought being an adventurer meant slaying dragons, learning powerful spells, gaining power - that sort of thing.” Astarion sighed again, long and dramatic, as he stepped over a branch. “But, no, here we are, armed to the teeth, tadpoles crawling into our minds, looking for a stuffed animal.”
You grit your teeth together and tried to ignore him. The sooner you found the girl’s stuffed bear, the sooner you could stop listening to his whining. “She said she lost it over here, somewhere, but something could have taken it or moved it by now. If we split up, we can cover more ground.”
You could almost feel the way he rolled his eyes. “Oh, great. If I find it, I’m not telling you. And I’m certainly not going to touch it. Gods only know what’s on it.”
“You’re such a child!”
He lays a hand over his chest, looking down his nose at you. “I’m so sorry that I have some dignity left.”
How did you get stuck with such an annoying, self-entitled, brat? 
“Fine! Then I’ll look, and you can follow me around like a lost puppy.” You smiled sickeningly sweet up at him, your whole expression filled with sarcasm and annoyance. “Happy?”
He scowled. “And I have to follow you because…? If you’re so eager for my company, you should just say so, darling.”
You shook your head, facade falling. “You’re impossible.” You stomped off. He could follow you or wait around, you didn’t have the energy left to care.
Oh, no
No
I just really like your face
You don't have to look so happy
I'm not really into love that you flaunt
In some glittery font
But if that's what you want
Make it snappy
I just feel so out of place
Well, except for when you're near me
When you're gone, I'm like a plant with no root
Or a song that's on mute
Don't you dare call it cute!
You should fear me!
And if the world was perfect, you would've never invaded my space
But since the world's obsessed with saying, "psych!"
Now I like your stupid face
-
You tilted your head, watching as Astarion held up a mirror. The tadpole kept him from burning in the sun, but it did nothing to bring back his reflection.
“Looking at something?” His voice catches you off guard. It was odd to have someone talking to you with their back turned, even more so when he could see your reflection and you couldn’t see his.
“Just looking,” you tell him. “What are you doing?”
He sighs, forlorn. “I’m looking, too, but not seeing very much. Another quirk of my affliction.”
“Do you miss it?”
He stands and turns while he speaks, finally meeting you face-to-face. “Preening in the looking glass? Petty vanity?” He sighs again. His face looks so droopy and sad, like a puppy left out in the rain. “Of course I miss it. I’ve never even seen this face. Not since it grew fangs and my eyes turned red.”
You look at his eyes, really look. It was hard to picture him with any other color. It was a side-effect of his vampirism, but you could go your whole life believing they always were and always had been red. “What color were they before?”
He opens his mouth to answer, then stops. “I don’t know. I can’t remember. My face is just some dark shape in my past.” His face scrunches up in rage as he throws the mirror on the ground. You step back to avoid the shards that break from it. “Another thing I’ve lost.”
You can’t imagine forgetting your face. It’s a rather big portion of who you are, after all. Thinking about looking in a mirror and seeing nothing stirs your stomach like a witch’s brew. You study his face, eyes tracing over every curve and sharp edge and wrinkle. You tried to imagine being him, no longer able to see what you looked like.
Astarion frowns at you. “What?”
“I’ll be your mirror.” The words are out before you can even think them, but a spark of hope flickers in his eyes, and you can’t bring yourself to back out of it now. “What do you want to know?”
“I want to know what the world sees when it looks at me.” He pauses. His voice gets soft, lacking its usual bravado. “What you see.”
He waits as you look at him. You try to figure out what the world sees, versus what you see. The world may see his eyes, sharp and red and keen. The world would see his dangerous smile, full of pretty teeth and sharp fangs, threatening to bite.
But it’s not what you see. You see his hair, paler than freshly fallen snow. You see the way it curls around his ears, how there’s always one stubborn strand hanging by his forehead. You see the wrinkles that crease his face when he smiles, surrounding his mouth and crowding in the corners of his eyes. And you’re startled, trying to figure out how long ago you’d noticed these things about him.
“I see… the creases when you laugh.”
He sneers, placing a hand over his chest. He takes it as an insult when you mean it in the kindest way possible. Without his wrinkles, he wouldn’t be Astarion. “Excuse me? I’m an eternally young vampire, not your doting grandmother.” He huffs. He looks like he wants to stop - never mind what he looks like, he doesn’t want to hear what else you could possibly say. But he continues, “You can do better. What else?” The curiosity wins out.
You wonder if you should tell him the easy answer. Tell him what the world sees. What everyone else sees. But to do so feels like a huge disservice. You inhale, prepared to be scolded once more. “I see the way your hair curls around your ears.”
“This is meant to be flattery, not poetry.” He sighs, creases forming between his brows as he frowns, annoyed. “Just tell me I’m beautiful and we can call it a day.”
“Is that all you want?” You don’t mean to sound as angry as you do. “Shallow praise?”
He scoffs. “Hardly.” He begins ticking off fingers. “There’s also gold, sex, revenge - quite the list, really. But failing any of those, I will always settle for shallow praise.”
You shake your head. “What I see isn’t good enough for you then? The seductive, charming face you put on for everyone else - that’s what you want to know about?” He sneers. He hates how easily you’ve read him. And you hate how much it hurts. You can’t tell if it’s because your words mean nothing, or because he can’t even allow himself a single, beautiful flaw. “The world sees your eyes. They’re strong and piercing. And your smile: Dangerous. They see you for the monster you are. Are you satisfied now?”
You leave before he can answer you. Anger trembles in your fingers, but they’re weighed down with sadness. A conflicting bundle of emotions twists in your chest. You shouldn’t care if all he wants is to be called pretty and move on. You shouldn’t! And you don’t!
But you do…
I just really miss your face
Though, by now, I must disgust you
I had tried to be the stubbornest mule
'Cause I knew life was cruel
So I guess I was foolish to trust you
But I wait here just in case
Though I know I'm being senseless
How could I have ever been so naive
And wear my heart on my sleeve
When I knew it would leave me defenseless?
And if the world was perfect, you would be here in my embrace
But since the world denied me one last kiss
I'll just miss your stupid face
-
The sun burned. Truly, honest to gods burned. And he ran. What else was he supposed to do? Bake in the sunlight while everyone else said their teary goodbyes, “We’ll see you down the road”, yadda yadda?
But, he can admit when he messed up.
He should have stayed longer. By the docks. The sun was just beginning to rise, he had plenty of time to slip from one shadow to the next before it was high in the sky. He could have said his goodbyes. He should have.
Already he missed Karlach. He fondly remembers when she hauled him over her shoulder, jostling him about as she ran. He certainly wasn’t too pleased at the time, but now… And he missed her nickname for him. And the banter, and teasing, and… everything.
Everyone had their charms, he supposed. Gale was, well, Gale, but even he wasn’t too bad. And you.
It was hard to admit. He could say he missed the others all day, but you? You who dragged him into the woods to find a stuffed animal for a kid? Who begrudgingly let him have a sip that night he revealed himself? Who yelled at him when he couldn’t bear hearing anything other than he wanted to when you offered to be his mirror? Who hugged him after he killed Cazador? Who helped him save his brothers and sisters and all the other souls whose lives he ruined? Who smiled so sweetly at him?
He couldn’t say it.
After he ran away, cursing and damning the gods for confining him to the shadows again, he disappeared to the Underdark. You’d mentioned how they needed a leader, guidance. And, well, he had nowhere else to go.
He never got to see you run in the direction he left after saying your goodbyes, smiling and excited. Or watch as you search and search for him. How you shout his name. How tears well in your eyes as you realize he’s gone.
And maybe it’s better that way.
What are you doing here?
I didn't run away!
It was... it was a strategic retreat
What is there to talk about? It's over—I ruined it
Well, yeah of course I'm sorry, but
No, no, don't forgive me!
Why do you do that?
Why—why give me another chance to mess things up?
Because you—what?
Those three little words
Out of the blue
Completely uncalled for
Especially from you
Why don't you hate me?
Why do you care?
Can't you berate me? Isn't that fair?
Where is your glare?
Don't you dare leave our problems and pain on the shelf!
Because if you don't hate me, I can't hate myself
But that's why I need you
You shatter my fear
'Cause despite my misdeed, you are still right here
Though it's stupid to date me
You're willing to try
And if you don't hate me, then why should I?
Are you sure you don't want to give up on me?
You're a moron
-
The last thing Astarion anticipates is you barging into his home, stomping and angry. The next last thing he expects is for you to throw a cloak in his face. He backs up as fast as you approach, tripping and falling backward over an armchair. It tips back with him and he lands with a thud. When he pulls the cloak off his face, you’re standing over him, still just as pissed as before.
“Ah.” He grins sheepishly. “Hello?”
“You ran away!”
“Yes, yes, I know-”
“You ran away! I went chasing after you and you were gone!”
“The sun! I couldn’t-”
“I know! That’s why I went and got you that damn cloak! And I was going to give it to you on the docks, but you ran away!”
He struggles to get up, grunting as he tries to push the armchair off so he’s not bent in half. You huff and sit the chair upright. Then, you offer him a hand. He’s not sure if he should take it. He’s half-certain you’ll flip him over and crack the floor with his body. But you wave your hand, insistent, and he does not want to piss you off any more, so he takes it. You haul him to his feet.
He holds the cloak out in front of him, studying it with a frown. “Darling, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but clothes don’t actually protect us from the sun.”
“Yes, I’m aware.” You sigh, hands on your hips, but you seem to have cooled off some. “It’s the Cloak of Dragomir. Gale helped me find where it was hidden. I figured, if the tadpole is the only thing keeping you safe in the sun, then after it’s all over, you’d need something else to protect you. So.” You gestured at the cloak.
He was speechless, and perhaps a bit skeptical. It had already been several weeks since the docks, and every day he would be lying if he said he didn’t miss it. Basking in the sun. Lounging in her warmth like a cat as he sleepily flipped through a book. It sounded too good to be true - a simple piece of fabric that could prevent him from turning to ash?
“Are you sure it works?”
You laughed, airily and annoyed. “No, I had a shortage of vampires to test it on at the time. I was going to find out when you tried it on. If it didn’t work, well…” You let out a long breath. You refused to take your eyes away from the cloak. Like looking at him again would bring all the rage and frustration back. “I’m still in touch with Gale. He can help me look for something.”
He spun it around to look at the back. It was a deep purple, with the only remarkable feature being a sort of fur around the neck and shoulders. He could almost imagine it hanging up in a shop.
You cleared your throat. “Put it on.”
“Hardly the best place to test it. The sun doesn’t exactly reach down here.” Still, he unclasped it and swung it over his shoulders.
It was light and breezy, allowing air to move through, but warm enough it kept away any chill - not very concerning for a vampire, but still a nice feature. It reached mid-thigh. He shifted around in it, testing its movement and fit. He bristled when he felt something brush against his arm.
He lifted up the edge of the cloak where he felt it, and his undead heart stopped all over again. There, messily embroidered on the lining in gold thread. Little Star. A poor imitation of embroidered stars surrounded it, forming a sort of faux night sky.
“I did that.” You clear your throat and scratch the back of your head, avoiding his eyes everywhere you looked. Every time you glanced back at him and his dumbfounded face, your cheeks heated up. “I know it’s not as good as yours, but, you know, I thought it was the best way to get a message across.”
His chest was full of emotion. He still had a hard time deciphering it all, even after so long of you carefully teasing them out. But through it all was one resounding question.
“Why?”
You finally made eye contact with him. You frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, this can’t have been easy to get your hands on. You could have sold it when I ran away, but you embroidered it, sought me out… Why? Let’s be honest, dear, we’re not exactly friends.”
“We’re not exactly at each other’s throats either.” It came out harsher than you meant. You took a breath to calm your nerves. “I know we didn’t really get along when we first met - hells, we still argued about everything under the sun with the slightest prompting, but I do care for you.”
His lips quick up slightly. “An unfortunate choice. I’m not exactly the easiest person to care for.”
“No.” You smile, soft and patient. It was hard to look at you now and connect you to the person who barged into his room moments ago. “But I want to. You’re worth the effort.”
So you think that we could work?
Here I thought I'd been the dumb one—what?
You're forgiving me for all I did wrong
You're unmuting the song
And, again, I belong to someone
No! You can drop the stupid smirk
Though by now I guess you've earned that
'Cause no matter how intensely I pout
Your stupid face will win out
And I guess it's about time I learned that
And though we go together like a Chanel Nº 5 and mace
At least it's not as dull as fitting like a glove
'Cause you're a nightmare that I've not been dreaming of
But I suppose that when push comes to shove
Fine!
I love your stupid face
-
You tugged Astarion through the city, releasing short apologies left and right to any early-risers you bumped into. He’d tried asking multiple times where in the hells you were taking him, but you never answered. You just shot him a bright smile over your shoulder and kept on running.
Before he knew it, you were at the docks. A light orange hue lined the edge of the ocean, signaling the sun’s appearance. He frowned. “You dragged me all the way out here to watch the sunrise?”
“Yes.” You squeezed his hand. Your eyes were wide and bright and filled with overwhelming glee. “You never got to see it last time you were here. But now you can!”
He scoffed, a grin teasing at his lips. “Darling, we could watch the sunrise from anywhere. We don’t need to be exactly here to do so.”
You rolled your eyes. “Well, no, but it’s more about the principle of the thing. You didn’t get to see that sunrise and say goodbye, but now you can.”
Red eyes scanned the horizon. Oranges and yellows flooded from the ocean-line, chasing away the dark blue of night. He couldn’t deny it was beautiful, but…
He swallowed, frowning out at the sea. He couldn’t look at your face as he asked, quietly, too afraid to actually put the words out there, “So this is goodbye?”
The edge of the star poked her head out. He’d enjoyed watching the sunrises and sunsets during your adventure. He would welcome her touch onto his skin every day, grateful for even just a brief moment to be able to feel her warmth again after 200 years. And every night he would mourn her loss, a seed of fear planted deep within that any sunset could be his last, before he would be contained to the shadows forever. He never got to savor the last one. The one time he wasn’t prepared to go gracefully into that night.
“It doesn’t have to be,” you whisper back. If you hear the shuddering breath he lets out, you don’t say anything. If you see the tears building at the corners of his eyes as he turns to look at you, you don’t point it out. “I can stay. With you. If you want.”
“I couldn’t ask that of you.” But I wish I could. He wants nothing more than to be selfish. To take every single scrap you offer him and give nothing back.
You release his hand only to better tangle your fingers together. Your thumb runs along his palm. “You wouldn’t have to.”
“You’d be living in the shadows most of your life, even with this,” he lifts the edge of the cloak to make a point.
“Okay.”
“You wouldn’t be able to go on adventures. You wouldn’t be able to find someone else, have a family, live your life.”
“Okay.”
“Why are you so willing to give up everything for me?”
You raise your free hand to his cheek. It’s haloed by the red-orange light of the sun. He hates the way he leans into it without a second’s hesitation.
“Is it so hard to believe that I’d stay because I want to be with you?”
He opens his mouth, shuts it again, and tries to find the words. Strained, he chokes out, “Yes.”
“My lovely little star, even without the cloak, I’d stay in the shadows with you for eons. Adventure would be empty without you by my side. There is no one else I could bear to put up with besides you.”
He takes a breath and closes his eyes. It’s hard for the words to sink in, but he urges them to. Staying with him would not be a burden. He is not a burden. He holds your hand to his cheek, pressing it tighter against his skin. By the time he opens his eyes again, the sun is halfway risen.
“I’m not good at… this. Whatever this is. I have no idea how to do anything more than what I had to do. I have no idea what will happen.”
You smile. “Now that sounds like an adventure.”
He chuckles. The knot in his heart loosens. When had you turned from an annoying thorn in his side to this? How long ago had you wormed your way into his soul? What would he do without you?
He feels like he’s just been thrown downstream - caught in the current and waiting for it to burn. He’s uncertain as he leans forward slightly, experimentally. You let him come to you; you wait patiently and smile at him encouragingly until he rests his forehead against yours.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Yes.”
The sun warms his skin as he lets go of the guilt holding him back. He’s a mess. He’s still working through his emotions with Cazador, trying to find footing amongst the spawn in the Underdark, trying to be good enough. And here you are saying he already is.
He catches your lips and allows himself to forget for the briefest moments that this is a terrible idea. How can he possibly think this is wrong when you sigh into his mouth and pull him closer? How can this possibly be wrong?
The reds, oranges, and yellows fade from the sky. Bright blue dominates the sky. And everything is okay.
---
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thewulf · 2 months
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Never a Burden || Legolas
Summary: Request: hiyaaa i have another legolas fic ideaaa! You write him soo well. How about reader who hasnt slept in a while and always offers to take watch. Legolas ofc notices after a bit and demands she doesnt take watch that night... Read Rest Here
A/N: Another one for my fav elf. Thanks always for the requests!!
Pairing: Legolas x Female Reader
Word Count: 3.1k +
TW: General LOTR triggers, anxiety, fear
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Throwing out your bedroll you knew it would be a useless effort trying to sleep as it was so dark out. The stars were hiding behind a thick layer of cloud that had other plans for the night. The further along in the journey to Mordor the more your anxiety grew. Ever since the group was attacked by orcs not long back you couldn’t seem to fall asleep at night. You were left to sleep during the small breaks the Hobbits needed or when you got to sit on the horse.
The attack was weeks ago now. The lack of sleep and the constant moving was really starting to get to you. You’d do anything to be back in Rivendell under the elves protection. One of those elf beds would feel immaculate in this moment.
“I’ll take the first watch.” You yawned, speaking to the group as they huddled around the fire trying to keep warm.
Legolas looked up to you with skepticism in his eyes. He was the most observant of the group. He’d noticed you slept less than he had ever since the ten of them left Rivendell. He didn’t know you well. You’d come accompanying Boromir, but he quickly grew a liking to you. You were quiet and reserved, speaking only when you thought it was needed and always helping. Even him being an elf didn’t negate the fact he found you quite striking for both a non-ellon and a human altogether. That and you were far more intriguing than any other creature he’d come across in all his years across middle earth. How had the thirty-year-old mortal done that to him? What were you doing to him?
Legolas was a far departure from his father, King Thranduil, who had a disdain towards the human race. Instead, Legolas found humans, you more so, absolutely fascinating. How much the race managed to cram in their short lives. It exhausted him at the thought of what mortals went through. But it was their normal.
“Aye Lassie. Why don’t you let Legolas take the first watch. You’ve been up quite a bit, yeah?” Gimli spoke up after Legolas had confided him in of his worries over you. Usually, you were chatty and upbeat, but that personality Legolas had looked forward too had vanished all too quickly.
“Oh, it’s all right. Really. I’m not terribly tired.” You lied. You were exhausted but sleep just wouldn’t come.
Legolas shook his head, “I insist, Y/N. You’ve taken watch nearly every night for the last few weeks. You need a break.”
You bit your cheek trying to bite back your usual sharp tongue. He was just trying to be kind. Little did he know he was doing the opposite of what you wanted. You craved a distraction from the darkening thoughts in your mind that drove your fear and anxieties through the roof.
You gave up after a few hours. The snores of all the males around you irritating you more than soothing you too sleep at this rate. You got up from your bedroll and walked down the path to find Legolas. You knew he’d be displeased at your arrival but truly, you could not sleep. After a few moments of wandering in the dark it was he who found you. He had the advantage of being an elf and all.
“Whatever are you doing awake mellon nin?” It was like he appeared out of thin air startling you more than you wanted to admit. You spun around look up into his ever so blue eyes that shone bright in the darkness. Somehow they were striking even in the dead of the night.
“I said I could not sleep. Gimli’s snores are bothering me. I needed to be away.” You sighed in frustration.
Legolas took your hand like he had so many times before. You tried to ignore the way your heart raced at his touch. Needing to get over it, it wasn’t uncommon to have to touch or pull or shield another person or creature in the fellowship from time to time. It didn’t mean anything; it was just how things were. Legolas could never like a human like you. You’d be gone in the blink of an eye. It was probably funny for elves, little mortal crushes that they likely forgot about after some time.
“Come sit.” He pulled you down with him at the base of a large tree. Once you’d settled down beside him he continued, “What bothers you?”
You weren’t really going to tell him. That was far too embarrassing. You were supposed to be a fearless Ranger of Gondor. You’d been hand selected to travel with Boromir at request of his father, Denethor II. How could you deny such an honorable request? A female hand selected? You had a job to do, and you were going to do it well. Even if it quite literally killed you.
Instead, you shrugged, “Cannot sleep is all.”
Legolas wasn’t going to accept that as your answer, “Why not mellon nin?”
You turned your head to look at his, “I don’t know. Sleep has always been hard for me.” It was a lie even Legolas could see right on through.
He was quiet for a moment before pressing on a bit further, “You view me as your friend, no?”
You’d known him for a few months now after departing from Rivendell and naturally you’d grown close to him the quickest. Boromir was always a comfort as he reminded you so much of home, Minas Tirith. But Legolas brought out a different sort of bliss that drew you too him. He was funny, witty, sarcastic, and so different than any other elf you’d met in your almost thirty years in middle earth.
“Of course, I do Legolas. Why do you ask?” Maybe if you played dumb he wouldn’t press.
But you were wrong, “You can talk to me about what is bothering you. I have noticed you have been… off.” He paused looking over to you to see your reaction. Your eyes widened slightly at his realization of you sudden change. You should’ve known he would notice. He was far more observant than the common male you usually found yourself around in the mortal world, “I am worried for you mellon. I have not seen you smile in weeks. When was the last time you slept through the night?” He asked hoping you would open up to him for once. Legolas had found you to be particularly hard to crack. Most Rangers were but you didn’t seem like you’d ever budge. You’d been trained to be a stone wall and you were excelling at it.
You looked down feeling suddenly guilty for making him worry about you of all things. There were so many things that his attention needed to be on, not you and your emotions, “I cannot sleep. Not at night at least.” You yawned feeling the exhaustion overwhelming you, but your mind would not shut off even as you begged it.
Legolas nodded, motioning for you to continue, “I know this.” He said without judgement.
You let out a small sigh knowing you’d just have to tell him. He was never going to stop, not now, “Ever since the orc’s attacked us. I can’t seem to sleep. My head will not let me Legolas. I try, trust me I try so hard. And I am so tired. So tired I am afraid I have become a liability. What good will I be in battle if I can hardly handle my sword anymore. I am weak and tired and…” You felt the tears overwhelming your vision as you let it all out. Once the words had started it was like a waterfall had come out of your mouth.
Legolas ran a comforting hand up and down your back as you let it out. You wanted to run away from his touch as you had so many times before. You were a Ranger. Rangers had solo lives. You couldn’t get attached; it wasn’t fair to anybody let alone you. But damn, as his fingers traced up and down your back you knew you needed it. This life was lonely, and you were terribly touch starved. It felt so good. You knew his touch kept you from spiraling further into your own mind. Thankfully, the tears subsided before a full-blown anxiety attack took over your emotions.
Once your sniffles subsided he spoke up trying to continue to provide you the needed comfort, “I will let no harm befall you mellon nin.” He gave your shoulder a squeeze hoping it would provide you some additional comfort you needed. Legolas was no expert in elf emotion let alone human woman ones. But you seemed to be responding to his gentle advances positively so he concluded he must have been doing something correctly.
You sniffled knowing you probably looked awful under the tears that had slipped out. It had been so long since you cried. Not when you learned your mother had passed. Not when you’d been stabbed many times over training and being a Ranger. No, now when Legolas had finally got you to open up to him after months of trying.
“You cannot promise that Legolas.” Your voice sounded horse after letting more out than you had intended.
His eyes narrowed in on your puffy cheeks, raw from the crying, “I can, and I do, Ranger of Gondor.”
But you shook your head in response, “I do not wish to ask that of you Legolas. You need to look out for yourself and the Hobbits.”
“And you.” He only cocked his head to get a better look at you. He wasn’t shying away from the conversation like you were. It had become too difficult to look him in the eye at this point. You were too mortified by the breakdown and the now defense that was stemming from it.
He was as stubborn as you were, “Legolas you…”
But he stopped you by placing a hand on your arm, “I do not wish to offend. But you can hardly hold up your sword any longer. Do not think that has gone unnoticed by me nor Aragorn. You cannot protect yourself let alone Boromir. Not until you let yourself rest.”
You looked away once again in shame. Thinking you’d done an excellent job at hiding these exact ailments. Words were suddenly hard as you failed to come up with a sentence. What was the best way to admit how scared you were to sleep. How embarrassing for a literal Ranger. If anybody were judging, thankfully for you, they chose not to say a thing.
“As I said, I do not wish to offend you.” He said once more, this time a little softer as he dropped his hand from your arm leaving you aching for that touch that seemed to come so rarely these days.
“Hardly.” You swallowed your breath and took the moment to finally look at Legolas once again. He was studying your exhausted form before his icy blue eyes landed on yours. While you knew you couldn’t see him as well as he could see you, your eyes finally adjusted to the darkness. He was a vision even coated by the darkness of the night. You’d never been particularly fond of elves. You had always found them to be far too prim and proper for your rough lifestyle. But Legolas defied all your expectations by being exactly what you hadn’t expected him to be.
He let out a sigh knowing you weren’t going to say anything further, “Will you try to sleep?”
But you shook your head, “No. It just frustrates me. Laying there, listening to the rest of them snore away.”
The elf next to you contemplated something for a few moments before finally saying something, “Go grab your bedroll.”
“What?” That was the last thing you expected him to say.
“You will sleep here.” He spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
There weren’t many excuses you could make as you just shook your head in disagreement, “I cannot do that…”
“Why not? I will help you sleep.” He stood from his spot offering a hand out for you to take. With slight hesitation you let him pull you up from your seated position on the base of the tree with a small pull.
“I do not wish to burden you with such small problems. We have much larger problems at hand is all.” You spoke out your final fear. Why should he care? All of middle earth was relying on your group to make it to Mordor to get rid of the ring. What was a little lack of sleep when orcs and evil could be ruling the world if they were unsuccessful.
His head snapped to yours with nothing but concern. An emotion he’d been wearing as he looked over you as of late, “You are not a burden. You are never a burden. It is a burden to see you not sleep. It is a burden to see you so weak when you are so strong. It is a burden that you have not come to me sooner mellon nin. Go get your bedroll and bring it here. I will help you sleep.”
Snapping your mouth shut you simply nodded to him, “I will be back momentarily.” Walking with haste you walked like a dog that had been kicked by its owner. Legolas had never been so outright with you before. You are never a burden… what had he meant of that?
When you had gotten back to him, very momentarily, he had already cleared out a space for you to sleep. Without saying much more you got into your bedroll knowing that sleep would be hard to come by, even away from the snoring of the males. Even getting all your fears out into the world you still knew sleep would never befall you.
“Close your eyes.” Legolas sat next to you being sure to keep his senses heightened as he helped you.
But before you did you needed to know one thing, “Legolas?”
“Yes?”
You turned your head towards him, “What did you mean I will never be a burden?”
He smiled a touch at your unusual vulnerability peeking through, “Exactly that mellon nin.” He began to brush through your knotted hair gently. His mother did this so many times when he was young to provide a sense of comfort. With the utmost gentleness he brushed out the knots from the long days of travel and lack of being able to wash, “I care for you very deeply, you know that. You are never a burden. You are my…” He paused wanting to say more but knowing it was not the right time. He was trying to get you to sleep not confess is true feelings, “friend. And I care for you. We care for you. We need you to care for yourself now.”
You hummed knowing he was right, “Okay. But… I am scared. Sleeping brings the terrors I cannot hide behind any longer.”
He shook his head continuing to stroke your hair, “I will fight them away. Fear not. Close your eyes. Trust me.”
You nodded closing your eyes beneath his gentle touch. Even as stubborn as you were his soft touch through your hair was already lulling you into a state you hadn’t seen in nearly three weeks. His tender touch was almost enough to lull you into a hopefully dreamless sleep. When he started softly humming a tune you’d so rarely heard you knew sleep would overcome you shortly.
“Thank you Legolas.” You mumbled unsure if the words were even coherent in your sleepy state.
“I will be here you when you wake, mellon nin.” He continued humming and brushing through your hair even after your breathes evened out letting the ellon know you were finally asleep. He continued to have his touch on you throughout the night knowing it was what your needed to feel safe.
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When your eyes were hit with the sun the next morning Legolas had kept true to his word. He was sitting beside you with his eyes on your waking form. You’d have been more embarrassed by his eyes on had he not spoken up before you could.
“How did you sleep?”
Scooting to sit up next to him you gave him a quick nod, “Very well. I do not believe I woke up once. I feel… good.” Giving him a smile that he had so rarely seen form you as of late he grinned in return to yours.
“Good. We will do this again tonight.” He stood offering his hand to yours.
You took his hand once again relishing in the closeness the two of you were having so ardently over the last few hours, “You must sleep too.”
“Do not worry about me. I have had plenty. With you taking every watch as of late I have been able to rest.” He smirked knowing you wouldn’t have a good enough comeback for that one.
“If you insist…” You wanted to give him an out. He didn’t need to care for you. To watch over you. He had other, much more important, things to worry about.
“I do.”
Deciding it best to pack up you just looked to him after, “All right then. We will do this again tonight.”
He nodded with a small smile playing on his lips, “I have forgotten how agreeable you are once you have slept my lady.”
Your mouth dropped open at that backhanded compliment that came so naturally to your elven friends, “I am not that bad.”
He shook his head mindlessly placing his hand on your back guiding you back to camp as you were distracted by him, “Just less stubborn is all.” His grin only widened seeing you crinkle your nose up trying to come up with a comeback but coming up short.
“You test my patience elf.” You spoke with a hint of sarcasm coming from within. As much as he tested you, you needed him far more than you could imagine. He’d become somebody to lean and rely on. Somebody who could be there for you when it was so often the other way around. He promised you’d never be a burden to him.
He laughed that beautiful sound that made your heart race, “And you mine. But, I would have it no other way.” You shut your mouth as the two of you made your way to camp where the eight of them were sitting, waiting on the two of you. He must’ve let you sleep longer than normal because they were all awake and ready to go. But seemingly unfazed by your appearance with the elf. He must’ve done or said something. Making true to his word. You would never be a burden.
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thechaoticdruid · 3 months
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*Annoyed muttering* People on Twitter smh.
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I'm just saying it makes absolutely no fucking sense for Astarion to be 40 years old in human years.
Elves have a lifespan of approximately 700 years and Astarion was turned into a vampire at 39. Now if we use the assumption that elves age at the same rate as humans till they reach adulthood (because if it didn't slow down Halsin at 350 would look like fucking withers) that makes it impossible for Astarion to be middle aged.
400-300 would likely be middle aged for an elf and Astarion didn't even hit 100 guys. I legit see people out here using his fucking hair color as a reason to claim he's old (I mean yes he is old he's a fucking 200 year old vampire, but physically he's very well preserved). Have you guys ever fucking seen an elf before in like anything ever? Just a little fun fact but in most fantasy stories elves have white hair because you know they're fucking magical creatures.
Okay rambling over. I honestly don't know why this annoys me so much. Probably some nerdy ocd thing and it doesn't make sense in my brain.
AHHHH 😤
Edit: So apparently there's some stats in a mobile game that says he's 350 (with vampirism keep in mind), BUT this conflicts with the dev notes saying he was turned at 39 so ehhhh.....IDK inconsistencies with lore in video games happen all the time.
Either way he still isn't fucking 40 in human years.
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ardafanonarch · 2 months
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Hello, in fic I've come across mentions of
- the elves stopping frequently on their journey to Aman to have sex (and Orome urging them forward by creating storms?)
- elf sex being too intense for most mortals to survive
I think these come from HoME or NoME (or similar sources), but I've never seen the actual quotes. There might be other things related to elf-sex in there as well.
So I guess my question is: What else did Tolkien mention about elf sex, apart from (the already relatively well-known) LaCE?
Elf Sex Lore
There comes a time in every Tolkien fan’s journey when they come upon the Professor’s writings on Elf sex — and, since 2021, there are even more! Elf Sex Lore remains a hot topic as the fandom continues to experience the aftershocks of the spurt of new lore that came with the publication of The Nature of Middle-earth (NoMe) in 2021.
As you say Anon, before NoMe was published, the fandom’s primary resource on Elf sex was the (in)famous essay Laws and Customs Among the Eldar (LaCE), published in 1993 in Morgoth’s Ring, the tenth volume of the History of Middle-earth series. LaCE is full of juicy (or not-so-juicy) lore about Elven aging, marriage, gender roles, naming, death, and rebirth.
It is in relation to the first two that we get some details on Elf sex, such as the knowledge that “it was the act of bodily union that achieved marriage, and after which the indissoluble bond was complete.” (Laws B). We also learn that:
“…the Eldar say* that in the begetting, and still more in the bearing of children, greater share and strength of their being, in mind and in body, goes forth than in the making of mortal children. For these reasons it came to pass that the Eldar brought forth few children; and also that their generation was in their youth or earlier life, unless strange and hard fates befell them. But at whatever age they married, their children were born within a short space of years after their wedding. For with regard to generation the power and the will are not among the Eldar distinguishable. Doubtless they would retain for many ages the power of generation, if the will and desire were not satisfied; but with the exercise of the power the desire soon ceases, and the mind turns to other things. The union of love is indeed to them great delight and joy, and the ‘days of children’, as they call them, remain in their memory as the most merry in life; but they have many other powers of body and of mind which their nature urges them to fulfil.” The History of Middle-earth Vol. 10: Morgoth’s Ring, ‘The Later Quenta Silmarillion (II)’, Laws B
*Note how this paragraph is introduced: “the Eldar say”. Phrases like this signal to us that LaCE is not written from a Elvish point of view. There are indications elsewhere clearly pointing to a human author with a human audience in mind.
Translation: Elves use up a lot of energy in baby-making, including in the sex part (“begetting”) but even more in the pregnancy and birthing part (“bearing”), so they don’t have a lot of children and they do so early in life, shortly after marriage. But even if they marry later in life, Elves are still able to have babies because being able to and wanting to reproduce are the same thing for Elves. But once they’ve fulfilled the desire to make babies they’re good and turn to other things. Still, they look back on the time of baby-making as “the most merry in life”.
In most (if not all) cases, when Tolkien writes about sex he is writing about reproduction. Did Elves have sex solely for pleasure? Maybe; I cannot find anything that says they didn’t. I also can find little conceptual separation of sex and reproduction in Tolkien’s writings. Make of that what you will.
(At this point I want to reiterate a principle central to this blog: it’s about presenting what canon says; it is not about casting judgement on creations that subvert, reinterpret, or ignore canon, none of which makes a work lesser than one which adheres strictly to canon.)
So what did NoMe add to our knowledge about Elf sex? First of all, let’s make sure we all know what NoMe is.
What is The Nature of Middle-earth?
NoMe is a volume of texts by J.R.R. Tolkien collected and edited by Carl Hostetter. It is basically a supplement to the last three volumes of The History of Middle-earth (Morgoth’s Ring, The War of the Jewels, and The Peoples of Middle-earth), which cover a period from the late 1950s to his death during which Tolkien was undertaking a rather massive project of worldbuilding, working out the structures underlying his Silmarillion mythology in preparation for revising and publishing what he had written of it before ‘a sequel to The Hobbit’ (LotR) took him away from it for the better part of two decades.
Christopher Tolkien in Morgoth’s Ring called this undertaking “analytic speculation concerning [the] underlying postulates” of his world (Foreword to Morgoth’s Ring). That’s how we end up with essays like LaCE and the philosophical debate about the fates of Men and Elves in Athrabeth Finrod ah Andreth.
The texts in NoMe all date to around the same time and deal with the same sorts of questions about the physics and metaphysics of the world: it contains the essay on ósanwë, for example.
The Context of the NoMe Sex Lore
The first section of NoMe, ‘Time and Ageing’, is where we get the new lore on Elf sex. As it happens, the sex lore is rather incidental to extensive ruminations two core questions:
How did Elves experience the passage of time and how did they age?
How did the population of Elves go from 144 at Awaking to a sufficiently high number (around 30 000) when they reached the shores of Beleriand on the Great Journey?
(It is not relevant to get into why 144 and why 30 000 here; suffice to say those are the numbers Tolkien wanted and he expended great imaginative and mathematical energy trying to make them work.)
A note on the textual context: Anyone who has ever engaged in worldbuilding knows how it can go. You think (for example), “Okay, I need to develop a backstory for this character’s spouse,” and before you know it you are knee-deep in invented genealogies and geographies and Eru-knows-what-else.
It’s important to bear in mind that this is what Tolkien was doing. The quotes we are about to look at (yes, very soon!) are from a collection of evolving (and unresolved) notes in various states of refinement from barely legible scribbles to carefully penned essays. I will let you decide what that means to you based on your personal definition of canon, but I wanted the textual context to be clear.
Elf Sex Is Intense
In relation to Question 1, Tolkien considers the time-scales of Elven growth, including pregnancy. In the essay under discussion, Tolkien decides that Elven pregnancy should, like human pregnancy, take about 3/4 of a year. Oh no - not that kind of year. A yên, a ‘long year’, the unit used by the Elves and to which the matter of their bodies (their hröar) is bound. Elves gestate for 108 Sun years.
I know what you’re asking: If the pregnancy lasts 108 years, then how long does the sex last?
No? No! You’re probably asking yourself why Tolkien hated Elf-women so much (don’t worry, he says there’s no pain…)! But Tolkien was interested in the first question, which he answered thus:
“On the other hand the act of procreation, being of a will and desire shared and indeed controlled by the fëa, was achieved at the speed of other conscious and wilful acts of delight or of making. It was one of the acts of chief delight, in process and in memory, in an Elvish life, but its intensity alone provided its importance, not its time or length: it could not have been endured for a great length of time, without disastrous “expense.”” (NoMe, p. 24)
An earlier version of this passage, which you may also come across in fandom, comes to a similar conclusion:
“But the act of procreation not being one of growth until the union of the seed and being under full control of the will does not take long - though it is longer and of more intense delight in Elves than in Men: too intense to be long endured.” (NoMe, pg. 27)
Translation: Pregnancy, like other aspects of physical growth, is a process of the hröa over which the fëa has no control; thus it is bound to unfold on “Elvish time”, i.e. 1 year = 144 years. But the sex leading up to it is an act of the fëa and under its control and therefore occurs at a “normal” speed. The Elves love it, too! But not because of how long it lasts, which is a regular amount of time, but because of how intense it is. In fact, it is so intense that if it were any longer they would suffer “disastrous “expense”.”
What is this “expense”? Basically, it’s referring to the usage of an Elf’s natural “vitality” — far greater than that of Men but not infinite. As far as I can tell, this passage means that having intense Elf sex for too long would have spiritual results similar to Míriel’s bearing of Fëanor, or Fëanor’s creation of the Silmarils. Too much of their spirit would be expended (used up) in the act, with possibly disastrous consequences.
These are the quotes from which, I think, originate the rumour that Elf sex was too intense for mortals to survive. As you can see, the discussion is about Elf/Elf relations. Elf sex is too intense for Elves to endure for too long. Anything about what this means for Elf/Mortal sexual relations is fan conjecture.
That’s the Elf Sex nugget from Tolkien’s considerations of Elven growth rates: Elf sex (between Elves) is intense but of a normal duration.
Elven enthusiasm for baby-making delays March
As you can imagine, more nuggets are unearthed in relation to Question 2, which boils down to Tolkien crying: “I need the Cuiviénen Elves to breed a lot and quickly!”
Initially, Tolkien developed some Elven life cycle schemes that had them taking a leisurely approach to reproduction, with each generation taking many hundreds, even thousands, of Sun years to materialise.
This scheme did not work for getting him from 144 to ~30k in the timeframe he wanted. So, he made some adjustments to the scheme with respect to the timing of Elven maturity and consequent desire to begin reproducing — and then set about getting those Elves procreating!
One of the solutions he entertained was giving the Elves opportunities to reproduce on the Great Journey. He laid all of this out in a timeline (NoME, p. 49-53) detailing where and for how long the host of Elves would pause because of the “desire to beget children” (p. 49).
Reading this timeline, it can become increasingly comical each time this desire to reproduce (i.e., have sex) halts the host. It can start to read like, “The Elves took forever to cross Middle-earth because they couldn’t stop banging!” And, in a way, that is what happened. But bear in mind the context is an attempt at solving the problem of increasing the Elven population to a number Tolkien considered satisfactory for his worldbuilding endeavours. An Elven enthusiasm for sex is there, but it’s not the whole picture.
There are several points on the timeline when Oromë hangs out with the Elves or checks in on them, and he does become increasingly concerned with their begetting-related delays. For example:
“About 2000 pairs (of available Telerin 8th gen. of 4,950) beget children in the spring 1130/80. The Chiefs and Oromë are disturbed.” (NoMe, p. 51)
(“The Chiefs” are Ingwë, Finwë, and Elwë.)
And:
“Either by chance, machinations of Sauron, and/or because Oromë withdraws protection (hoping to make the Eldar less content with their new Home (Atyamar), winters are hard and the weather worsens.” (NoMe, p. 51)
The second quote is the origin of that rumour about Oromë creating storms to urge the Elves on because they were having too much sex. Is it canon? Not quite: Oromë didn’t create the storm, for one, and the emphasis is on sex for the pleasure of children more than the pleasure of sex on its own (though, as we know from the previous discussion, sexual pleasure was certainly had!). But the rumour you've heard is not without basis in Tolkien’s notes.
The First Elves Really Loved Sex
There’s one more Elf sex nugget in NoMe that I’d like to end with. While scrambling to get his Cuiviénen Elves reproducing at an adequate rate to reach his population-at-finding target, Tolkien came up with what he calls the “Quick prolific” scheme (p. 99).
“The Quendi in their first few generations before the March (or reaching Valinor) must — as is quite reasonable — be made far more eager for love and the begetting and bearing of children. *They must have larger families, at shorter intervals between births.” (p. 107)
To explain this attitude of reproductive eagerness in the first few generations of Elves, Tolkien coins the term “philoprogenitive” — they love to procreate! Procreating — not artistic and intellectual pursuits or exploration or leadership as with later generations — is their number one priority in life. So much so that “they mated almost at once with their predestined mates” (p. 54).
Not only that, but they have so many babies! In one version of the scheme, 12 children per couple in the first generation (p. 108). (This soon changes to 6 per couple. Philoprogenitive they may be, but no one gets to outdo Fëanor).
As with the highly intense Elf sex and the Great Journey delayed by procreating, this is another bit of NoMe lore with great imaginative potential. As we learn from LaCE, Elves enjoyed sex, quite a bit actually, but they enjoyed a lot of other things also, and after a period of baby-making they would usually move on from sex (though they would always remember it fondly). But the First Elves, those early generations by the shores of Cuiviénen? No such balance between sex and other pursuits. It was all about sex and procreation for them.
Of course, what we’ve been looking at are drafts and notes. While all written around the same time (late 1950s to early 1960s), none of the texts here examined were ever finalised and many of them don’t even agree with each other. Tolkien was experimenting; he was worldbuilding. And with the publication of these notes in NoMe, we in turn get some intriguing ingredients for worldbuilding of our own.
So, do as you like with the Elf sex lore. But if you’re looking for a great setting for some canon-compliant smut, may I suggest Cuiviénen?
Resources
PDF of LaCE
Mythgard Academy’s seminars on The Nature of Middle-earth. You don’t actually have to have read or own NoMe to follow these discussions. Great for getting a handle on the material, and ideal for listening as you work your way through reading.
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Text
Making Humanoids Less Human
I did make a small post on this, but now I've got the art for a much bigger and more detailed post! so here we go.
I had several anonymous asks that all came in quick succession weeks ago. Every single one of them was basically just a variation on "how would you take (typically humanoid) fantasy being, and make them look less human?"
This blog does not exist for me to just give people original designs for free, my goal is to show off my own personal thoughts about fantasy design and help people figure out how to adjust their own designs to fit their vision better. That means when people ask me questions about how to do something, I want to give them things to think about so they can come to their own conclusion. I don't mind making original designs to illustrate concepts, but a whole flood of "show me how to make this specific thing look different" all at once like that was too much. I'm not answering them all individually, it's just not what I want to do.
But what I can do is show my own thoughts and ideas about how to take any fantasy design and push it further away from "human", and you all can look at my ideas and figure out your own way to do things!
So here are the main 4 methods I've come up with to make humanoids look less human.
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(image description: a simplified drawing of a humanoid face surrounded by four altered versions of the same face. clockwise starting from the top left, they are:
Speculative, drawn as a cat person. Additive, drawn with horns, pointy ears, sharp teeth, and a second pair of eyes. Subtractive, drawn with blank eyes, no nose, and no eyebrows. Exaggerative, drawn with a long face and huge eyes, as well as a wide mouth, narrow nose, and big ears.
end description)
I am personally a fan of the speculative route, which means exploring an alternate root of evolution to create a new design. Through this method, I've created monkey elves, frog goblins, and pig orcs.
the additive option is the most common, I think. adding new feature or doubled features to a humanoid form is a very intuitive way to change the design and make it look less human. you see this in most fantasy and scifi designs, like star trek aliens and the dnd player races.
subtractive and evaggerative are the most common options for people that like the uncanny valley. it's really easy to make uncomfortable designs by removing or exaggerating recognizable features, and they're often used together. Slenderman, for example, removes all facial features and skin color but also exaggerates the limbs and body.
Combining the four methods will give you a really interesting design as well! So for practice I decided to explore an alternate design for Tieflings, the part-demon player race in dnd.
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(image description: four examples of differnt tiefling designs using the previously described methods. the additive example is just offical dnd art of a tiefling woman with purple skin, horns, and a long tail.
the subtractive sketch looks very alien, with a bald head, empty eyes, and no other facial featuers aside from a small mouth. it has three fingers per hand and two toe per foot.
the exaggerative sketch shows a hunched humanoid figure with huge eyes and big ears. the neck, limbs, and digits are all long with claws at the ends of the fingers and toes, and the limbs are also quite muscular.
the speculative sketch shows a bipedal figure with features similar to a giraffe, including a long neck, ossicones, and hooves.
end description)
now, because tielflings have such a distinct look to them, obviously my new sketches don't really look like tieflings, do they? the only one that comes close is the giraffe. relying only on one type of alteration to the human form has left the designs rather empty and lacking in the more iconic traits of the original concept. so i tried a sketch that combined my ideas! it came out looking like a completely different creature lol, like it could be a kobold or something, still not really a tiefling.
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(image description: a sketch of a creature with a giraffe-like head, long tongue, and sharp teeth. it appears to be roaring at something and stands in a half-crouch. it has long limbs with hoof feet and clawed hands, as well as a long tufted tail curled behind it. end description.)
didn't work out. too far into the animal side of the speculative evolution, I think. so I tried again and got a design I liked much better!
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(image description: a digital painting of a tiefling leaping back and casting a glowing orange spell. she is wearing a tunic with a corset and detached sleeves, as well as several pieces of jewelry. Her skin is purple with dark patches like a giraffe's spots, and she has a giraffe's ossicones as well as hoof-like hands and two-toed hoof feet. Her tail is long with a tuft at the end. She has glowing eyes and a flat nose, and there is a single sharp tooth visible poking out of the side of her mouth. end description.)
Brought the face back into slightly more human proportions and that helped a lot. Sometimes designs just take a few tries! that's normal.
and hopefully this is helpful to all of you! there are so many ways to alter humanoid designs to come up with something original and unique to you!
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aphroditesmoon · 10 months
Note
Hi! I’m not sure if u do smut or not but I was wondering if u could do a Legolas smut with fem!human!reader, like a enemies to lovers kind of thing. Maybe hate sex? <3
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too close
legolas greenleaf x reader
summary: legolas has his doubts about who you really are, but is that really why he can never meet your eyes with anything else but anger in himself.
warning: afab reader, nswf, smut 18+, etl, legolas being a jerk, probably bad description of mirkwood
a/n: soo sorry i took ages, I've been taking new meds, also i havent written smut for a while so im a bit dusty, hope u like it<3
○○○○○○
Summer is barely a real season under the protective courts of Mirkwood, you could barely feel the heat or see the sun through giantic starfall tree and at night, the chill through the strong winds gives a hint of winter in its air.
You loved it. Training at night feels easier when your not already sweating through your tits ten minutes in warm ups. And the quiet around you, save the crickets and owls hooting, gave you the solace you seeked for each existing day you lived through.
But despite finding everything well with want you asked for, the universe seems relentless with making sure you'll always be keeping your guard up and your annoyance up higher, with the ever consistent appearance of Prince Legolas Greenleaf.
He stands by the corner near an entrance to the castle, watchful of you while thinking he's quiet. His lack of trust in you makes him believe that you somehow lack in the specialties of elf abilities, like for example, your keen hearing.
"I could hear you for a mile away, prince." You also caught onto his snort, before his footsteps sounds louder. "How did you lnow it was me then?" He asks, less snobby than usual.
He must be drunk, you tell yourself.
"You have that pompous, all knowing kind of stride, it has its own beat when you walk." You expected him to roll his eyes like he usually do, belittling you like a child being reprimanded. But suprisingly he laughs. "That sounds a lot like you're projecting, after all, only pompous, all knowing arseholes are the ones who isolate themselves and train alone."
Ah, there it is. He's sobered up then.
"And what humble, kind enough of an elf, would waste his time stalking other people just to throw insults like a 7 year old?" You snapped.
If he had found your irritants amusing before, now his smile fades altogether,  and he looks the same as when he's about to pull an arrow on an orc.
"The kind of an elf who's trying to protect his kingdom and father." You laughed honestly yet mockingly before dropping your sword altogether to look at him. "You think your doing the king a favor? His majesty has his own mind, he trusts me, so I'd suggest you drop your savior facade and trust him." He shook his head and looks away for a second, as if deep in thought. "My father doesn't trust anyone, let alone random rogue elves who comes out of nowhere."
You raised you brow at his bravery in speech. 'This random rogue elf is the reason your father is alive, if I had even a glimpse of malice in me, I wouldn't have done nothing but serve him well for the last 10 months." You say matter of factly.
And before he could argue again, you wave your hand at him annoyed, and turn your back at the prince. "I practise better when im alone, and now you've ruined my peace, if you don't have anything new or smart to say-"
"You are a witch." He speaks. You actually freezed for a moment, forehead frowned in confusion. "Excuse me?"He repeated his impossible words. 
"Im a witch...because i saved your father's lives?" You ask him, slowly. He looks more frustrated then ever, as if you're the one patronizing him.
"No, you are a witch, because you have bewitched him." You could laugh if you didn't want to punch him. "And how have I bewitched him?" You almost yell. "I don't fucking know!" He yells first.
"My father has never trusted anyone, except for me, yet i see he'd put his life in your hands if he has to. And you know that, you know what you are doing. How you win his praise and trust when you fight, and when you put yourself over him, over the other shooters, martyring yourself."
Your mouth was wide open, your brows furowing, but no words escape you as he continues, inching closer with every word, untik you're both a step away from eachother.
"And you know exactly what you do to me." He was hovering over you, with a glare so intense you've never seen from the mirkwood prince. "I've done nothi-" He cuts you off when you've just gained enough control to speak. "You've bewitched me."
His breath was steady even in such anger, fanning your face gently as he inhales and exhales.  "I don't trust you, and i shouldn't care too much of another fighter in our army, another stranger i shan't waste my time on. Yet one glimpse of you, and you're stuck in my head, like a memory i can't seem to forget."
he was silent after the last confession ends, and you have the stubborn urge to answer to him. "That sounds like a you problem, not mine." He gives a short bitter laugh, looking up to the sky for a second, as if praying to the stars for guidance. "What have you done to me, cruel enchantress."
The rage seemed to lessen in the glare he still holds at you, but something more hungry lays in his gaze. "I've done nothing. Im no witch." You answer, so over all of this cat and mouse game. "And if I was, I wouldn't waste my time on someone so frustrating like you, and your stupid perfect nose, going around acting like you're-" He cuts you off, closing the small space between the two of you with his lips.
It was persistent, the way his mouth pushed over yours, like a strong wave crashing over sands, forcing it to feel the same surge it's being held againts.
When your hands finally found its strength, you place them againts his chest, pushing him off, he startles and moves a step, eyes locking with yours.
His hands that were once on each sides of your face, falls down to his side, fingers flexing as if too empty now. "I hate you." He says. His eyes saying the opposite. Your mind repeats over and over of what he had done and you tell yourself that it can't get any worse or better than this, so you took a move yourself forward, standing on the ground he was on a second ago.
"Then why don't you show me how much."
You don't hesitate to pull his face towards yours, recreating the similar scene as before. His hands move to wrap around your waist, while yours tangle themselves in his untied long white hair.
You gasp when his tongue licks over your bottom lip, giving him what he wanted, your tongues clashes as you two continue kissing eachother like you're out of air. You don't flinch when he backs you up until your back meets the flat of a wall.  His right hand starts to fliddle with the laces tying your leather top on. You help him take it off before your own fingers helps him take his breeches of while he moves his lips to your neck.
"I like you better with your hair down." You manage to gasp out while he's sucking on your neck. "And I like you better with your mouth shut."  Legolas replies before his hands easily turns you around your face meets with the wall.
You barely hold on to the wall when his grip on your hips tighten, your own training tights pulled down before you felt him againts your back.  You squirm and let yourself grind againts his hardness when one of his hands move to your front to squeeze your breasts, flicking your nipple, gently moving lower then from your chest to yoir stomach, grazing your scar filled abs until it gets lower to where you want him the most.
He's still squeezing your left hip while rubbing his hard cock againts your ass.
Finally as he sinks into you without notice,  receiving  a loud whimper from you, his hand over your hips move to grabs a fistful of your hair, pulling your head back againts his chest. His right wandering fingers were still againts your front, rubbing circles on your thighs.
You're too speechless, feeling yourself filled up to the brim by him. He doesn't move at first, head laying low by your neck, hot breathing againts your cheek. You almost cry when he slowly pulls out, until he pushes himself in again, harder tham the first thrust.
He doesn't stop them, pushing into your hole repeatedly, his hands moving up from your thighs to your clit, rubbing over it with a pace that wanted to make you scream.
Legolas finally regains enough strength to start biting and sucking on your neck, marking you, while he doesn't stop pounding into your wet cunt.
The fullness of his cock and pressure of his fingers makes your cunt tighten againts him, he lets out a growl you've never heard if the elf prince before he bites down your sweet spot harshly, making you scream out his name. "Fucking hell." He groans out, fucking out all his pent up anger and tension over you.
.Your hands feels slippery againts the wall, gripping againts nothing while he takes you like a ragdoll, manhandling you take his cock over and over, watching you turn into a crying and moaning mess.
"Legolas, please- uh." You mewl out to him He hears you, pleased he is as he lets out a grin againts your neck. "Please what, my love?" He asks huskily.  Love, thats a new one.
"Need to come-" You beg out to him.  And Legolas, for all his false pretense of hostility before, could never say no to you.
He pushes your face againts the wall again,  both of his palms now back to each side of your hip, tightening againts them as he plunges himself harder inside of you as you scream out his name, shameless of who could've heard them. Your nipples grazes againts the hard bumpy walls, oversensitive to everything now,  you clench againts him so tightly that you could hear him curse out in elvish as he holds on to your bruised sides.
You feel tears brimming in your eyes as he continues fucking you while you explode all over him, your orgasm leaking out of your cunt, all over his leg. "Argh- im going to-" He doesn't finish his words as he finally cums after you, his hot cum leaking into your hole and then lower lines on your arse.
His head leans on your back, his breathing rapid and sweat glistens you both.
Legolas pulls you back by your breast, letting you rest on hus chest while the two of you try to regain some air. His fingers grazing the valley of your tits, head stuck on the side of your forehead. Once you've calmed down from your high, you tilt your head towards him, relishing his warm arms around you.
He leans forward, letting your forehead meets. You let out a small smile.  "Now what?" Your voice gentler then expected. "Now-" He answers, voice hard. "-I'll take you to my chambers, and I'm fucking you again."
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dalishious · 26 days
Text
Reclaiming Independence of the Dales
Before anything else, I’d just like to clarify that that vast majority of this is made of my own ideas, based on interpretation from the little canonical information provided, and a little inspired by my own people’s history and governing structure. Additionally, what I am presenting here is an ideal situation, not necessarily what I think is an immediately realistic outcome in the world-state established. So, please keep that in mind.
The Dales were established as a homeland for elves—a small piece of a continent that was once called their home in its entirety, before the humans colonized it—by Maferath in -165 Ancient. This was in reward for the eleven people’s participation in the fight against Ancient Tevinter. But in 2:10 Glory, Divine Renata I broke this treaty and declared an Exalted March against the Dales, ending in its annexation by Orlais.
[Related Post: All You Need to Know about the Exalted March of the Dales]
If Solas has very low approval with Inquisitor Lavellan, and Lavellan accuses him of not doing enough to help their people, he will say the following: “You could order Halamshiral returned to the Dalish, if you wished. But ultimately, you know that would fail. That even you cannot solve this.” I hate this with a burning passion. The reason I can’t do that, Solas, is because it’s not an option in the game! Why are you as a character angry at me, the player, for not doing something that is not an option for me to do? Why was this written? Just to push the point that it’s not worth it to try and fight back against oppression? Because if I refuse to accept hopelessness in real life, why would I in accept it in a video game where the story is made-up, and therefore anything is possible if the developers so wish it.
Regardless, according to Solas, the Inquisition has enough power to support the reclamation of an independent Dales. I imagine this would require a lot of political maneuvering within the Orlesian governance, and therefore I think the best opportunity to do this would be with Briala ruling through Gaspard. This would then later open the door for Briala to be the leader of the newly independent Dales, too. I would like to see Briala as ruler of the Dales not just because she is a favourite of mine, but because I genuinely believe she is the best established character fit for the job. She was trained in everything Celene was trained in, has first-hand experience in court, has extensive connections, and has demonstrated her ability and desire to utilize these skills and assets for the benefit of elven kind.
Briala’s blackmail on Gaspard may help prevent Orlais from invading again while under his rule, but to last longer, the Dales would need to establish itself as a strong, independent Nation with allies. This is why I believe it would also be important to have Leliana as Divine Victoria in such a world-state where this could happen. Leliana re-canonizes the Canticle of Shartan, and in making it available for the common person to understand, would ideally help sway the minds of the average Andrastian into supporting the Dales’s independence. The nobility would of course be much trickier, because they and the Chantry are the ones who actually benefitted from its annexation—but there is little they would be able to actually accomplish if they did not have the power of the people behind them.
As far as allies go, Ferelden could only gain from Orlais losing control of the Dales, because it would mean cutting Orlais off from a lot of Ferelden’s border, therefore reducing the threat of another invasion. Additionally, a leader with just plain good morals like say, Alistair, would easily accept the elven kingdom’s return. But even Anora is willing to grant part of the Korcari Wilds to the Dalish if Mahariel requests it, and while this sadly doesn’t last, it does show a positive sign into her potentially being open to the idea of an independent Dales as well.
I sincerely doubt that all Dalish clans would return to the Dales and re-settle down. After all, they have developed differentiating cultures over the years of wandering in separated groups, with different ideals and different ways of life that they might not want to give up. But many would return, and that would likely create conflict between the elves coming from the Dalish clans and the elves coming from the cities. We know that some prejudice exists against “flat-ears” as some Dalish call those from the city, and we know that city elves have adopted a lot of misinformation from humans into their views of the Dalish. It would take time and positive leadership to reconnect the people, without risking falling into some sort of hierarchy based on origin. This is why I do not believe one group or the other should single-handedly rule alone. Rather, I think there should be a Grand Council of High Keepers made up of those voted into the position each to represent a single district of the Dales. (I like the idea of there being seven High Keepers, not just because there are seven traditional districts of Mi’kma’ki, but because it works out that there seven of the Creators. So it makes sense that there would be seven High Keepers.) The Grand Council would meet and make decisions together, with one appointed leader at the head to act as the Council’s chair.
In terms of protection and order, the Emerald Knights should be reformed. This would include the Fade Hunters, to protect the people against demons and maleficarum, with there being no Circles or Templars.
Restoring the independence of the Dales would lead to a revival of elven culture in ways that could never happen before, because they would actually be free to pursue re-learning the language, re-discovering the history and culture, and sharing it all amongst each other. They would not have to fear arrest the crime of simply being an elf.  
But what of the other races presently living in the Dales? I see no reason why they would have to leave, so long as they would be willing to follow the Grand Council’s leadership. I imagine many nobility would flee to Orlais, simply because they would not stand for it. But for the average human or surface dwarf, their life wouldn’t really even change much; they’d still be managing their farms the same as always. Hell, it might even improve things for them, assuming the Grand Council gives fairer treatment than the nobility previously.
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spacebarbarianweird · 4 months
Note
Please, what are you headcanons about Astarion and human Tav/Durge? There's obviously the angsty issue of humans having one of the shortest life spans of all DnD races but that's only as angsty as you want it to be in this setting (and the stories you can tell about it are what makes it fascinating). Still... What's your take on it? Would that be a disaster for a proud immortal elf?
Since humans are very diverse I decided to take female human Tav who isn't exactly a big girl but would be considered "curvy" by human beauty standarts.
Astarion x F!Human!Tav
Masterlist
Headcanons
You are the third child born into a big family of seven.
Unlike your sisters, you are that girl who is always teased for "eating too much" or "needing too much fabric for a dress."
It would bother you if you had issues with self-esteem. But you don't.
"At least, I have some tits and ass!" you jokingly say to people who decide to comment on your looks.
Besides, your father, a native to Frost North, has always told you that "the bigger a woman is, the more chances she survives a winter".
You inherited from your northern ancestors' red hair, the color of fire.
Freckles dance over your pale skin and, when you laugh, you can be heard in the neighboring village.
Since there's not much for you in life apart from marriage, you sign up to join an adventure party.
Being an adventurer isn't easy. It's dangerous for a lonely woman but you manage to find friends and learn how to protect yourself.
And you are still this jolly human woman who just can't allow herself to stop because your years are so short.
You probably regret this attitude when locked inside the Mindflayer's pod with a nasty tadpole behind your eyes.
You gather this group of traumatized people - it's not like you are the most competent person, but you are, at least, not experiencing the meltdown!
Astarion immediately catches your eye - he is an elf. And it's a common knowledge humans see elves as the most beautiful creatures ever.
Does he think he manipulates you into protecting him? Too bad. You decided you weren't leaving this adventure without this handsome elven man by your side.
A vampire? Even better.
You are much stronger than him and a bit taller.
You can easily pick him since his bones are so light.
And he adores your body.
Your breasts are pretty big and your thighs are soft.
He likes using your boobs as a pillow and you don't mind - because it gives you full access to his hair.
Or putting his head on your soft belly and thighs.
He also adores your body hair - especially the one in private parts.
"You know among humans it's considered ugly unless you are a man"
"No wonder human women prefer elves."
You look adorable in dresses with deep necklines and ribbons in your curly red hair.
And Astarion loves seeing you in the morning, when you, awake from your long human sleep, look at the world with puffy eyes trying to apprehend wtf you saw in your dreams.
"Don't even ask, human's dreams are fucked up."
When Astarion is distressed, you often put him on your knees and lull him like a child.
And it's difficult for him to adapt to your lifestyle.
You are considered a slow type for a human but you are still a human
You are ambitious, loud, and fast. You have so little time left, you want to experience it to the fullest.
You are smart, brave, skilled and unstoppable like a human traveler, who decided they want to reach the edge of the world.
You keep being adventurers until it's too difficult for you.
Your red hair turns white, and you have wrinkles. You aren't a jolly red-haired girl any longer.
You are a jolly old lady who can both bake cookies for neighbor kids and beat someone's abuser with a hammer.
The time passes fast and it's time for you to go.
"You were quite an adventure, Astarion", you whisper to him
"And you were everything", he replies holding his tears back.
Astarion wants to leave the moment you find rest in your grave, but your family, the loud red-haired clan doesn't let him go.
Well, it's not like any of them were ever prepared to have a vampire for an uncle but here they are.
Astarion visits them from time to time, seeing how children grow up, how new things get old, and how the village becomes a town and then a city.
Human lives are so short, they make the most of them
Astarion visits less and less and only some of the oldest residents of the city know about him.
"Oh, yeah… I remember. My grandmother once told me her great-grandfather's sister was married to a vampire."
Sitting at the seashore, waiting to sail to the Isle of Evermeet, Astarion remembers the words he once heard from an old elf.
"You need to fall in love with a human at least once in your life."
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imyourbratzdoll · 1 year
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𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒔𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂… 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒆𝒙𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒊𝒏
🎄christmas masterlist🎄
warning - smut, oral sex, sex, stalker behaviour, breeding kink, maybe a bad pun?, human reader, santa male, reader may be a bit of a whore, but I can't blame her, slight angst, slight fluff, maybe a bit of kidnapping? (but, like... what's really considered kidnapping? especially if it's by ari)
18+ only please, christmas present for you all but mostly for @royalsweetteaa, the gif and header aren't mine. merry christmas!🎅🏻
Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.
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You scurry around the kitchen, whipping yourself up a hot chocolate. The past few weeks have been… Interesting, to say the least, from having the cutest little men accompany you to a giant monstrous man devouring you. Your mind was fuzzy, wondering if you’ll ever see them again. Grabbing your drink, you slowly make your way to your lounge room, prepared to watch one of your favourite Christmas movies. 
Your mind is too focused on not spilling your drink that you don’t notice the older man sitting in your chair. His legs spread, thighs and bulge straining against his red pants. Darkened blue eyes glare at your small form as you walk in his direction. Ari’s hand lifts to his thick greying beard, wondering if you will ever look up. Not that he will complain if you sit on his lap and tell him what you want for Christmas. “I never expected your favourite Christmas movie to be How The Grinch Stole Christmas” A charming grin makes its way onto Ari’s face when he watches you jump slightly. Your head snaps up, and you stare at him with wide eyes. Your grip is tightly wrapped around your cup, ensuring the liquid doesn’t spill.
Your eyes take in his tight red and white outfit, subconsciously licking your lips as your eyes trail down his body, loving how it fits his form perfectly. Your brows furrow as the pieces begin to fit together, the outfit, the greying beard, the red hat with a white pom pom on top. Your eyes slowly move back up his body before connecting with his blue ones. “You’re Santa?” You slowly place your drink down, becoming curious about the man you swear you’ve seen before.
Ari chuckles, leaning back into the chair. “Mmhm, and you’re my little hoe… hoe… hoe.” His joyous chuckle fills the room at his pun, and you giggle as well, feeling your heart warm at the sound of his laugh. A small smile takes place on Ari’s face as the laughter dies down, and his large veiny hand pats his thigh. “Come sit and tell Santa what you want for Christmas.” Ari watches you hesitate, worrying your lip as you think. “Unless you want to be named Naughty.” Slowly he moves to stand, but a loud humph escapes him when you land roughly onto his lap. 
You look up at Ari, eyes slightly fluttering as his warmth seeps into you. A calming feeling washes over you as you take in his scent. The smell of Christmas fills your nose, warming your insides. “Now, what’s a little girl like you want for Christmas? I mean… It shouldn’t be a lot seeing as you’ve had my elves and even the big bad Grinch.” Ari’s grip tightens on you.
Your cheeks turn rosy pink, and you stare at him with wide eyes, chewing on your bottom lip as you try to think of an explanation. “I can explain… I… They…” Your brows furrow as you begin to pout, not knowing what to say. 
Ari grins as he watches you struggle, pulling your small body closer to his larger form. “Don’t worry about it, darling. Now, what do you want for Christmas?” Ari rests his chin on your shoulder, his eyes slowly closing as he takes in your sweet scent, humming as he waits for a response. Ari can feel you begin to squirm against his throbbing member, holding back his groan as you continue. His thumb rubs the exposed skin on your hip, “hmm? I am Santa. I can get you anything your heart desires. All you have to do is tell me.” 
You relax into his body, feeling anxious about what you really want. “I… I want to be loved… and not just for one night but for eternity.” Both you and Ari can feel your heart speed up, how your breath hitches after you’ve spoken of what you truly desire. “B–But… If that’s too hard, I would like a pet. Nothing too big, maybe just something small.” 
Ari’s breath against your neck sends shivers down your body, “I think I can do both, but only for you.” He spins you around in his lap, causing you to face him. “But, for the first one. You do have to give yourself over to me. It’s the only way it’ll work.” Ari stares at you with his big blue eyes, his gaze flickering down to your plump lips as a soft smile spreads across your face, your head nodding rapidly. 
“I’ll do anything!” Tears are brought to your eyes as you think of finally getting your wish. No longer will you be alone or unwanted. You give Ari a bright smile when he grins at you, his hand coming up and resting on your cheek while his thumb strokes it. Subconsciously grinding down onto the large bulge in his pants, feeling the pool of slick building between your legs.
“Anything?” You nod again. Ari smirks at how eager you are. “Will you keep Santa warm even after I’m done breeding you?” The nod you give sends shocks of pleasure straight to his thickening cock, the member nearly breaking through the material as he hardens. Ari lifts you slightly, pulling his cock free before settling you back onto his lap. A grunt leaves him when your soaked core touches him, “Aren’t you a naughty girl, wearing nothing underneath this whole time while sitting on a stranger’s lap? You were expecting this, weren’t you?” The shy look you give him answers his questions.
Biting your lip, you slowly begin to rub yourself against him. Soaking Ari’s giant cock, soft moans escape you when his thick mushroom tip hits your swollen clit. “Please, Santa! I’ve been a good girl!” A scream falls from your lips when Ari thrusts himself deep inside, not giving you any time to adjust as he grips your hips and fucks you down onto his cock. Your head falls back, eyes rolling to the back, mouth hanging open. “F–Feels good! So good! Please!” 
Ari growls, his eyes fluttering as he feels your juices soak his pants. His hips thrust rapidly, hitting your sweet spot perfectly as his heavy sacks tighten. “Good fucking girl! You’re so fucking tight!” Quickly standing, Ari continues to fuck into you as he lies you down on the couch. His large form covers you as he pounds deep inside your tight little hole. The girth of his cock stretches you perfectly. “You feel so good, darling! You’ll forever be mine once I fill you up!” Ari buries his face into your neck, planting kisses and marks along your flesh. His grunts and your moans fill the room, and the feel of your walls fluttering around him causes Ari to bite down on your neck before he grunts into your ear. “You’re going to carry my children! Walking around the North Pole, swollen and glowing!” 
“Everyone!” thrust “will!” thrust “know!” thrust “your!” thrust “MINE!!” With a rawr, Ari’s hips stutter roughly into you, his balls tightening, and his chest heaves as he cums deep inside your cunt. Spurts of warm white cum shoot out of his swollen tip, overfilling your womb. He continues to thrust until your back arches, walls squeezing and milking his throbbing member as your orgasm hits hard, your sweet juices squirting out of you and soaking his uniform. Ari falls onto you, trying to catch his breath as you wrap your tiny arms around his muscular body. He pulls back and looks deep into your eyes with a dazed smile. “You’re my good girl, understand?” 
“Yes, I’m your good girl.” He slowly pulls out of you before moving down your exhausted body, opening your legs so that he can see his cum leak out. He groans, his thick fingers moving closer to your quivering hole and pushing it back inside. He leans forward and takes your swollen clit between his lips, beginning to suck. His fingers thrust and curl as he laps at your cute little button. “Santa! Oh! Fuck!” A slap fills the room, and your back arches as pain and pleasure shoot through your cunt and up your spine. 
“Bad girl! No swearing!” He growls into your cunt, burying his face deep into your sweet honey pot. “You taste so fucking sweet! I get why my elves and The Grinch are so fucking obsessed!” His tongue and fingers move fast against your sweet cunt, and the groans that leave his lips add extra vibrations to his movements, causing pornographic screams to escape you. When Ari curls his fingers into the correct spot, black spots cover your vision as your back arches, your eyes roll back, and your juices squirt out of you and directly into Ari’s mouth. He groans as he drinks your sweetness up, not missing a spot. 
Ari pulls back, sitting on his legs as he looks at you. His greying beard is covered in your juices, and his hat has fallen off, causing his long hair to stick to his sweaty forehead. His darkened eyes peer down at your blacked-out form, a smirk making its way onto his face as he glances down at your puffy red pussy. Standing, Ari fixes his uniform, tucking his cock back in and snapping his fingers, causing himself to look as good as new before he looks around the room. With a wave of his hand, everything in your house disappears. Ari leans down, picking you up bridal style before disappearing back to the North Pole. As you both appear in his bedroom, he lays you down onto his soft, red and green silk sheets and glances down at you with a soft smile. “I can’t wait for you to be full with my children.” Ari gently kisses your forehead, and his hand comes up and strokes your cheek. “Welcome home, Mrs Claus.”
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thank you for reading!
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izalemon · 2 years
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Would you do yandere male elf x reader smut
Yandere m!Elf x f!Reader | SMUT/NSFW/⚠️18+
All His
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Warnings: non-con, dub-con, obsessiveness, oral, face sitting (not in the way you think), forced relationship, forced marriage, drugging, bondage
Summary: after finding a portal which leads to a world you’ve only seen in fairytales, you befriend a powerful elf whose obsession with you only grows as the days for by
🔞18 YEAR OLDS AND UP🔞
Author’s note: Thank you for the ask! This is the first one I’ve gotten and I really appreciate it! NONE OF THE ART OR PICTURES ABOVE ARE MINE!!! Also, yet again, there is a difference between fantasy and real life. It is perfectly fine to have rape fantasies so long as that’s how they stay, fantasies. (Or role play) Rape is one of the worst things that can happen to someone so please be careful out there loves❤️ stay safe and don’t go through mysterious portals you find in your grandmothers’ attic.
You never really believed in magic or fairytales or anything alone those lines. So how exactly did you end up here?
On a balcony, dressed in the finest cloth, looking over a magical forest filled with creatures you’ve only see in a dream…or in this case, a nightmare.
Your husband…no…your abductor…stood behind you. You could feel his breath on your neck while his hands held on to your hips. It had been nearly a year of being held by this…creature.
You still remember the first time you met him. It was so clear, so vivid, it was like looking into a mirror. And a mirror it was. A mirror in your grandmother’s attic that is.
You were only meant to spend the summer at her place. Keep her company while she got herself settled into her new home after her retirement, help her move in, and how did that turn out?
Well…after you saw her sneaking up to the attic with, at first a large wrapped object and next a cloth, you decided to do some snooping. And what do you find? A large mirror with a big white cloth over it.
So…she moved a large mirror up two flights of stairs, unwrapped it from the moving foam, only to hide it away in an attic and cover it up again?
I’m sorry but that just didn’t sound right to you. I mean what was so special about this mirror that she would hide it away like this? Something obviously.
And something it was. After you inspected it you found out it lead to some other world. Of course you found out by tripping into it but who needs to know the details? You ended up in a forest, one filled with the most vibrant colors and plants you had never seen in your life. You wandered around until you came across a man. A rather tall man. He looked to be well over 6 foot. 6’6, 6’9 perhaps? More even? He was dressed in elegant clothing fit for royalty.
You explained to him your situation and he seemed to know what you were talking about.
“Oh, yes I know her! Your grandmother did you say she was? Wow, I hadn’t even realized how much time had passed.” He laughed. “Here, I’ll explain everything to you while I have someone set up your way home.”
He told you how your grandmother used to travel through the portal to his world for research. Apparently the two never got along since she would constantly be breaking entries onto the palace grounds to explore. You found it quite comical that she would do something like that, given how stingy she was about rules in her own home.
Whilst he took you through the town and towards the palace, you noticed how everyone was much taller than you.
“You aren’t human…are you?”
“No, I’m afraid we aren’t. Although our races share similar qualities, we are much stronger and live for much longer. Some of us have their theories that we’re more intelligent, but nothing’s been proven.” He told you.
“Oh…so you’re…aliens?”
“I wouldn’t say that since this technically isn’t on another planet, just another dimension. We call ourselves elves.”
“Oh! Like from the Lord of the Rings? Or D&D?”
“Um…I’m not familiar with your media. What is it exactly?”
“Oh, never mind, you probably don’t have them in your dimension.” You sheepishly replied.
And with that, you had made friends with a prince of the Elvish world.
For the next few weeks you would travel to his world and hang out with your newly made friend for a few hours, and return back through the mirror he has in his palace, which drops you off in the forest in your world near you grandmother’s home.
He enjoyed your company much more than your grandmother as far as you could tell. The big giveaway was that he straight up told you.
The two of you were sitting in his large library while you scanned through the vast amounts of other worldly literature while he enjoyed a glass of red wine.
“Your company is far more enjoyable than that of your grandmothers’.” He told you.
“Oh, what makes you say that?” You asked him.
“You’re easier to manage. And you aren’t trying to steal my things.” He chuckled fondly.
“My grandmother tried to rob you?”
“Many times.” He said, standing up and beginning to approach you. “Haven’t you asked her about it?”
“Um…well, no. I didn’t want her to find out I was snooping through her things.” You admitted.
“Hm.” Was all he replied with while he took another sip of his wine.
You proceeded to visit him throughout the whole summer. You wanted to know more about his world. And you wanted to know more about him. You didn’t want to admit it to yourself but you started to grow feelings for him. Something you would obviously never say out loud. He was from another dimension and was of another species. Although the two of you are of similar intelligence it doesn’t change the fact he’s clearly not human.
When you first started to feel this way to stopped visiting him for three days straight in an attempt to gain control of what you were feeling. But when you returned after your small break, you came back to him rather, so to speak…pissed off.
“Where were you?!” He demanded of you.
“I was busy so I thought I’d just…stay home.”
“I was worried. What if something had happened to you?!”
“Nothing happened! You don’t have to worry!” You told him.
“Just…next time you do that…warn me? Please?” He asked.
“Well what if I’m sick? I can’t exactly predict when I’ll be ill.” You said, giving him a hypothetical smugly.
“Then climb the few flights of stairs you have in your home and come here! I’ll take care of you.”
“You? And just leave my grandmother?” You asked him.
“I’d…I’d…Ugh, listened I’d rather you be here and taken care of under my supervision than worrying about you in another world.” He admitted.
Your heart seemed to skip a beat. You turned away blushing and just nodded your head, worried that anything other than the simple gesture would give away the affect he had on you.
Ever since then you never missed a day.
That was until the end of the summer, when you had to return back to your home.
“You’re leaving?” He asked.
“Yes…the summer is over in my world, and I can’t live with my grandmother forever.” You explained to him.
“How long…how long will you be gone?”
“I’m not sure, I didn’t make any other plans to return for as long as I did. But whenever I visit my grandmother I’ll visit you as well.”
The two do you were sitting on a balcony at a small table. He had stopped eating whatever it was he was dining on and simply sat and stared into space.
“You…you can’t just leave like this!” He pleaded with you.
“We both know that this has been coming for a while now. I…I have a life to get back to.” You told him, trying to make him understand.
“What? Was…was I just a vacation? You thought you could just walk into my life and then leave? You can’t just do that to someone! Make them care and just ditch them.” His voice was rising, he was growing desperate.
“What do you expect me to do? Stay here forever? You live for centuries, I only live a few decades. If I do stay I’ll only be taking up a fraction of your life. I would be like a pet, and I don’t want to be someone’s pet.”
“No! You wouldn’t-just…please think about this? Please…” he begged.
You sighed. It hurt you to hurt him like this, but you knew if you kept on living a fantasy you would eventually lose your mind. As much as you cared for him…you needed to get back to your world. Plus, you wouldn’t even be able to survive here if you stayed. You couldn’t digest the food properly, the medicine here doesn’t have an affect on you, and you were far more vulnerable to sickness in this world, sicknesses that couldn’t be treated in yours or theirs. The two of you weren’t even of the same species. How could you stay?
“I’m sorry…I hate to leave on a sour note but you just don’t understand. I can’t leave everything I’ve ever known for you.” You told him before getting up and beginning to walk away.
But you were stopped, he had grabbed your wrist and stood with you, refusing to let you leave that easily.
“Marry me.” He simply put.
“What?”
“Marry me. Please. I love you. There are ways we can extend your life. We have witches and wizards who we can seek the help of. Please…I…I don’t want you to leave me. I can’t bare to see it.” He admitted.
“I can’t marry you.” You whispered, turning away from him. “I…I care for you…but we aren’t even from the same world. Like I said,” You pulled your wrist away. “I can’t leave everything I’ve ever known.” And with that you turned away.
You traveled through the mirror portal that was held in the palace and appeared in the forest next to your grandmother’s house. You were upset you left him like that, you had hoped he would have taken it a little better, but you supposed even that was too hopeful.
That night, after you had packed up all of your things, said your goodbyes to your grandmother due to the fact you were going to be leaving earlier than she would be up, and set up your flight back home, you laid down in bed and attempted to fall asleep. Of course guilt was eating you alive. You felt so bad for leaving him like that but you couldn’t just drop everything for a guy you had only met two months ago.
But he didn’t see it that way. No, not at all. In his eyes you were the only one fit for him. He had never grown so close to someone in such a short amount of time. He had to have you. He needed you. He wanted to marry you. He didn’t care if you were human and that you lived significantly less than him. He’d be damned if he couldn’t find a way to extend your lifespan.
But first he needed you here, with him, in this world.
Of course he would have to also get items like food and drinks from your world due to the fact you couldn’t eat anything from his. It was a shame since if that hadn’t been the case he would destroy the portal which lead back to your world so that you could never leave him.
An inconvenience for sure, but a necessary one.
Since you weren’t coming back to him, he’d just go and get you. He brought a strong chemical that would keep you asleep while moving you along with a few of his guards in case anything unplanned came up.
But luckily nothing like that happened, and now you were safe and in a deep sleep on his massive bed.
Because of the chemical you slept much longer than usual and he watched over you every second he could. When he was busy he sent guards to watch over you and would send them away as soon as he came back.
When you woke up you were frightened and confused but he soon calmed your nerves. Of course you only began to panic once more once you realized he had kidnapped you and wasn’t planning on letting you go any time soon.
“You can’t do this! I don’t want to marry you! And I certainly don’t want to stay here!” This was apparently the wrong thing to say to him.
Unbeknownst to you, the man apparently had a temper that he managed to hide very well before, but once you said those words to him you realized just to what lengths he would go to make you his.
You didn’t remember falling back asleep. You didn’t remember him drugging you, but you certainly felt it. You felt it in every part of your body. It felt heavy, as if your limbs were being held down by immovable weights.
But it wasn’t just the work of drugs that was holding you down, oh no, there were leather traps buckled around your wrists and ankles, chained to the bed frame.
And…you were only in a bra and panties.
“Have you woken my love?” A voice cooed from the end of the bed, snapping your attention away momentarily from your vulnerable state.
You tilted you head up and saw him standing there. Dressed in all white wearing a see through material that left nothing above the waist to imagination.
You felt your heart thump in your chest. What was he doing? Oh god what was he going to do to you?
“You don’t want to marry me you say? Hmm. Well let me give you a little history lesson my love.” He told to sweetly, as if he didn’t have you tied up to his bed, only dress in your undergarments.
“In my culture,” He sat down next to you. “When two individuals…get intimate…it is seen as binding their souls for eternity. You don’t necessarily have to have a ceremony to be wed, you just need to…oh how would you humans put it? I believe you refer to it as…‘fuck?’”
You cringed and turned away.
“Of course we don’t need to use that verb.” He said, almost panicked that he had made you feel uncomfortable, well…more than you already were. He gently took hold of your chin and tilted it back to him. “I personally prefer the term, ‘make love.’ That’s more what this is isn’t it? Making love…becoming one…”
“Please…don’t do this. I…I’ll marry you, I’ll never leave here again…just…please don’t defile me.” You sobbed.
“Defile you? You think that’s what this is? Why would you refer to such a beautiful act of love as defilement?” He questioned, obviously offended by what you had said.
“We have a word for what you’re about to do to me. To take me without consent. It’s called rape and it’s one of the worst crimes you can commit it my world. So touch me and I swear I will never love you and will never submit to your will. I will scream and struggle so much that neither of us will enjoy it.”
He stared at you…silently.
Then he laughed. He started laughing. Laughing at you, laughing at the situation. Why on earth would he be laughing?
“Oh sweetness. Trust me…this won’t be…what do you call it? Rape? Whatever. Either way…you’ll want it soon enough, I suppose the drugs just need a little longer to kick in.”
What? Drugs? Did he drug you with even more shit? What was it? What would it do to you?
“What drugs?” You dared to ask.
You felt his hand on your chest, beginning to travel down your body. You shivered when it ghosted over your stomach and towards your hips. Only to find its resting place on your clothed cunt, pressing a finger against your clit.
“Ah-!” You yelp. Why did it feel so good? It’s never felt that way before, so why now?
“Oh? Did that feel good? Then I guess the drugs have kicked in. They just needed a little jumpstart.” He chuckled innocently.
No….no they were sex drugs?
You pulled at the chains, desperately trying to wiggled your way out. Out of the restraints, out of his grasp.
“Stop! Stop please! I beg you!” You cried. “I’ll marry you! I’ll marry you please!”
“Oh yes you will.” He uttered, shifting his weight over you and down. His voice sounded further away. “You’ll marry me tonight, when I’m deep inside of you and your begging for more.”
“No.” You couldn’t look at him, you shut your eyes tightly and turned your head away.
“Of course…you need to be prepped first~”
You snapped your eyes back open when you heard that, you didn’t even have time to react completely before he pushed your panties aside and dug in.
Your back arched and your eyes felt as if they had rolled all the way back into your skull. Never had you felt this way before. The drugs obviously were affecting you in a way your body relished but your mind continued to reject it.
His tongue danced around your lower regions. He bit at your thighs, ghosted his tongue over your clit, circled the bud with his wet flesh before sucking on it gently at first before building up to a harsh suck to the point where he was hollowing out his cheeks. And just as you were about to cum he’d stop and repeat the whole process over again.
“Stahh…st-UNG! No! No pleahh…uh! Ah!” You begged breathlessly.
“There’s no point in resisting when it’s clear how much you enjoy it.” He laughed, mouth still partly attached to your pussy.
You couldn’t deny the overwhelming sense of euphoria that coursed throughout your entire body. Nothing had ever felt this good before. Just how much of that drug did he give you?
After continuing to edge you for the next few minutes, minutes which felt like hours to you, he finally stopped and sat back up, staring you down with once kind eyes that had turned into one of a predator.
“Oh my sweet, sweet bride.” He cooed at you, tucking a wet strand of hair that had been suck to your face behind your ear. “You have no idea what you do to me do you?”
“Please…” You sighed.
“Please? Darling, you’re going to have to be more specific than that.” He teased, smiling down at you.
“I…I can’t-!” You cried out. A few more stray tears managed to seep out of your squinting eyes.
“Hmmm…poor thing. You just need to release. These drugs really must be annoying you. Making you feel so needy and sensitive, but I just won’t let you get there. I’m making it sooo difficult for you to fully be able to enjoy yourself…aren’t I?”
You struggled against your binds, you were unable to respond, all you could do was cry. The drugs were clouding your mind, to the point where the only thing you could think of was him. Him and the things he could do to you.
“But before I can cater to your needs dear…” he began. “I’m going to need some help myself.” He leaned down to whisper the last part in your ear, sending shiver down you spine.
You watched as he began to unbuckle his belt. Oh god…what now? You didn’t think you could take any more, yet at the same time the drugs in your system made it feel like you were going to explode if you didn’t get enough. All of these confusing thoughts and emotions swirled around in you mind, clouding your judgment even more than before to the point you hardly noticed him straddling your chest, tilting you head upwards and slipping his cock inside of your mouth.
You whimpered worriedly.
“Shhhh…relax dear. I’ll return the favor soon enough. But for now you can take care of my problem before I take care of yours right?” He asked you innocently, even giving you a little head tilt.
He began to gently rock his hips into your mouth, sliding his aching head and shaft in and out of your unhinged jaw. He felt absolutely blissed out.
Here you were, all his for the taking. The one who he loved so much, who he fell for so quickly. His bride. His little innocent bride who was all his to corrupt. All his to take. And god, you did not disappoint.
Your mouth felt so good. It was difficult for him to keep a consistent pace, but he would. He didn’t want to cause you any strain and made sure to go slowly and precisely, always with a purpose.
“I…I…oh god~ oh god darling-!”
You felt his hand reach out and grip at the base of your head, pulling desperately at your hair. Even now, even with him filling your mouth to its limit, somehow the drugs were even making that feel good. You awkwardly began to bob your head with his movements, you just couldn’t take it. You needed stimulation. You needed him to finish so that he could get back to you.
And with just a few more shaky thrusts, he pulled out of your mouth and came in a small hand towel he had grabbed from the bedside table. His breathing was heavy and his cheeks were crimson red.
He wiped off a bit of excess that had spilled onto your cheek, making sure his filth didn’t obscure the beauty that was your flushed face. A face that would look even more beautiful once he was buried deep inside of you, fucking you so intensely that you wouldn’t be able to remember your own name. So passionately that your eyes would cross as you came so hard that your back would arch up into his body so that your only support was your shoulders and his hold on your hips. He wanted to be the only thing that could ground you in a time of such intensity.
Yes…yes that’s what he would do. That’s what he would do for you. It was only fair after everything you’ve done for him.
He leaned down and kissed you deeply, rolling his body and hips against your own.
“You did so well for me. Now be good and don’t make a fuss while I return the favor.” He commanded before taking off your bra and panties, having to rip them due to the restrains. But it’s okay, he would just get you more. He would get you anything you wanted. You were his bride after all. His wife. His cute little human, so small and weak compared to his tall elvish body.
His little human,
…all his.
…his
…his.
“OH-oh…fuck!”
“Ahh! N…no…I…I….”
Your words mixed with each other’s as he plunged deep inside of you. A deep red coated over both of your faces. You turned away…you couldn’t bare to look upon him while he was violating you like this.
But he just couldn’t take his eyes off of you.
As he thrusted in and out, moving your bodies together, as if they were one. Like they were always meant to be one.
The chains jingled from above you with just how passionate his movements in and out of your body were. Hitting just the right spot each time within you. He needed you to feel as good as he did. He needed you to feel the way he was. And he would, whether you thought you liked it or not, because deep down he knew you did. He knew you loved it.
How could you not?
The sounds you were making proved his point. You were practically singing. Your sweet, angelic voice ringing in his ears, singing a song only the two of you would ever hear. Telling a story only the two of you were in.
He needed you. He needed more of you.
“God! You’re killing me!” He moaned out.
He grabbed the underside of both of your knees and began to press them down, towards you head as far as they would allow, until the chains stopped him.
He huffed, reaching over to snap the chains before continuing to push you knees down towards your body, just enough for you to feel a slight sting.
He began to bounce his hips on top of your beautiful body even harder. You could practically see small hearts in his eyes.
You had given in a while back. What more could you do? The drugs were obviously too strong to fight, and even if you did find the will power to…you were still tied down by your wrists and dealing with a being of inhumanly strength as shown when he snapped the chains like it was some cheap string. He could snap you in half if he wanted to. He might even, considering how unbelievably hard he was pounding into you.
Plus…it’s not like you could form coherent thoughts anyways. The only thing going through your mind was him and the immense amounts of pure euphoria coursing through your veins.
It was exhilarating.
And it soon reached and all time high.
You came hard.
Harder than you ever had before, and you weren’t sure if it was because of he drugs or him. Perhaps both?
Either way, you let out and ear bleeding screech that was muffled with his lips on top of yours again.
The two of you came at once, he had been holding it for a while, waiting for you…to share the experience with.
“I do.” He whispered into your mouth after slightly pulling away from the kiss. Your lips still brushed ups against each other.
“Wha…what?” You asked breathlessly.
You didn’t have any more strength. Your muscles were heavy, you probably couldn’t walk after that, and even if the chains were taken off…you weren’t going anywhere. You could barley shift your head.
“Say it…say I do.” He whispered to you again, lightly grabbing at your jaw.
“I…I do…” you complied, finally letting the sweet release of sleep overtake your body after giving him what he wanted.
He just stared at you. Your peacefully at rest body, underneath him…he could do whatever he wanted with it. But for now…he would simply clean up the mess he made in between your thighs, not wanting his filth contaminating your body longer than it needed.
And with that night you shared…you were his ever since. You haven’t left his side, he hasn’t left yours.
And despite you being his wife…it felt much more like you were his personal prisoner…who he made love to every night and so cruelly made you enjoy it each time.
Who made sure to give you all the affection a lover could ask for. How cruel.
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yandereheathen · 5 months
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The Cost of Protection [Yandere elf guard x Fem Reader] 18+ Chapter #1
Based in Barovia (Curse of strahd, some dusk elf lore spoilers) Warnings: Non-con touching/kissing/ some violence, obsessive treatment, death threats necromancy?
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Living in Barovia was hard enough; trying to do business in it is quite the other. Besides all of the ghosts, Undead creatures, and living under the tyranny of a centuries-old whiny vampire, everything was complicated. Still, you had your own set of struggles. Your Tavern was not necessarily famous, but it did good business. You had your regulars, Travelers who would sometimes come and try their hand at defeating the vampire lord Who you never saw again unless it was their Undead body, and some other travelers who were peddling wears pies, toys, weapons, anything that you could imagine then there was the common folk and Crafts People. Everyone was welcome in your Tavern. You offered a warm smile, a glass to drink, and whatever you could scratch up to cook that day; however, you had one unwelcome guest who changed your path forever.
 Maverick
 It wasn't uncommon that Dusk elves would come into your Tavern. They followed Vistani and often went through the cities of Barovia on a standard route, and more and more did you feel like you saw them integrating with the town, so seeing one dressed in a guard uniform was unusual but not unheard of. His long dark hair was braided up in leather twine, and his eyes were the standard golden color, but you did see a tiredness in them. He was only an inch or two shorter than you. After all, you were pretty tall for a human, but he was well-built and had hands that showed both work and strength. His smile and his voice were the things that stood out most. It had a ruggedness that you admitted caused a little heat in your cheeks the first time you spoke with him.
  Speaking of the first time, You remember clearly the first time he stopped by your Tavern. You treated him sweetly, flashed a smile, and put your arms down in front of him, looking up at him with innocent eyes leaning at the bar.
"Anything to drink, sir?"
You Tend to be flirty with everybody. It was basically in a bar person's job description. Still, you noticed that some visitors would give you an extra coin or became regulars if you gave them special treatment. However, his smile made you a little uneasy, almost excited. It was a smile that said he appreciated your treatment and wanted more, how much more you didn't quite understand that time. Did you know that that smile would lead to many other things? He just put your hand just under your cheek and, tilted his head, and said
"I think a beer or mash number 8 would be okay before I have to eat. I could live off your voice and those beautiful eyes forever.
 You just left thinking he was making some flirtatious joke, pulled his draft, and handed it to him. From what you've gathered, asking him simple questions about his life gave you non-committal answers or general mods. He was pretty new around town and it was just getting to know all of the local businesses, and he heard that you could get a good cup for cheap and that a cute shop girl was serving the drinks. You laughed again at his flirtatious joke, but you noticed that his eyes never left you from your lips to your shoulders, down your neck to your chest. Even to your backside, when you were turned around and helping other customers with their drinks, you didn't think much of it then. Still, it definitely left you a little unnerved.
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 After that, he became one of your regulars. You knew his drink by heart, you knew what he liked to sit in at what time, and you learned exactly how to speak with him. Not too much, but he did enjoy hearing a little bit about your day. He wasn't much of a talker, but you don't mind, or you did not have the time. 
One night, a set of particularly Rowdy young men was causing ruckuses in your Tavern. You tried to compile them with free drinks and sweet words, but you needed more. It all came to a head when one of them tried to get handsy on you, and he was greeted with a sword to his neck. The man went still as Maverick whispered in his ear, pressing the dagger a little bit closer enough to cut into his neck. He looked at the other two men and said in his low, deep voice. 
"Oh, did you both want to be next? As much as I would joy putting all your heads on a platter and making it for the next stew, this one would not appreciate making a mess of her Tavern. How about all of us be nice to you all? Get the hell out of here before I make an example."
 They tried to avoid messing with a guard, let alone a dusk elf. There were rumors of them knowing dark magic. Magic rants to them after the travesty of their women being wiped out, dark magic that was taught to them by Rahadin, the right-hand Master of the lord of the world. The ability to raise the dead and control minds are abilities right from hell."
 They all scurried off. You were thankful, bowing to Maverick and taking his hand, promising free drinks for the rest of the night. Still, he took your hand and looked at you, his golden eyes hidden behind something mischievous, something lustful that weighed heavy on your heart. In your chest, you felt the heat rise up from your stomach.
"Darling, we can make a better arrangement. How would you like me to offer my protection?"
 You looked at him, confused, but still held his hand, your head tilted. 
"I would always be thankful, but isn't that what you usually do? I wouldn't want you to give me special treatment."
 "Oh well,"
 He takes your face and his hand. Squeezing your cheeks ever so slightly, 
"If you give me special treatment, I'll give you and your customers special treatment. After all, you wouldn't want anything to happen to you, your Tavern, or your customers, would you, darling?"
 He forces your eyes up to his and brings your lips closer. The rest of the Tavern, already daunted by the commotion, looks away. You simply nod in agreement, and he lets you go, patting your shoulder and laughing good-heartedly. 
"well, perfect, I think I'll take my first payment tonight."
 You panicked, thinking about how much she could get into the day, and said, 
"How much are you asking for? I've already offered you free drinks. I don't know what more I can do.-"
 He cuts you off, putting his finger to your lips. 
"Don't worry. You have everything that I could want to need."
 And he walks off.
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 After closing, when all of the lights in the streets were out and the spirits were already roaming the streets, you clutched to your apron, putting up the last of the chairs. The candle lights were just barely about to go out. You counted up all of your money from the day, and while you made enough of an earning, you were very worried that he would not have enough to pay for this new extortion. You had heard stories of guards and heroes extorting young men and women for protection. You did not think it would happen to you that living in a place of cold and darkness was curse enough, but it looked like the fates had a little more for you. 
You almost didn't hear him come in as he stuck his hands around your waist and up your throat. You tried to yell out, but his hand covered your mouth, and he kissed just the side of your ear as you immediately felt yourself wanting to flee. Then he whispered in your ear, 
"Oh, now that's a pleasing darling. As much as I would have so much fun chasing you, I don't have the time tonight to have my cute little rabbit." 
He put his hands down your hip, lifted your dress, and ran his hand up your thigh as he kissed your jawline and neck. You stammered, still trying to get free. 
"You said you wanted payment. I'm really to pay. The draw is open. Take what you want. I don't care. Please, just don't hurt me."
 You cry through your struggles, but he just laughs, nipping where your neck and your shoulder mean, 
"Oh no, my little rabbit. As much as it delights me to hear you after having to endure hearing you simper over every man who can give you coin, I'm finally able to take the prize that is Rightfullymine after all that will be our deal."
 He lifts you up and plenty down on the closest table, the wood scratching into your shoulder, your head banging painfully on it. You cry out in pain. It is silenced by his mouth crashing into yours in a kiss. A rough kiss. He pins your hands down, holding his fingers In times with yours as his tongue searches into your open mouth, wrestling to pin it down. You see his golden eyes boring into yours like a beast unleashed. You stand there stunned, unable to move with his weight pushed against you. Even with your slight height Advantage, his trained muscle and sheer force can do nothing. 
He breaks apart, your lips bruised and your tongue hanging out of your mouth, a stream of saliva connecting both of your mouths. 
"Please, why are you doing this?"
 You manage to choke out as you feel him grinding into your lower half just underneath your dress. 
"Well, it's pretty simple, my cute little rabbit. I only joined the guard because I was bored, and I thought I could find some fun beating up the locals or helping young maidens. Still, I saw you, a bright Lily, and a swamp of muck to see simpering and pampering to everybody who entered your Tavern was so endearing I knew I needed to have you. I knew that you were mine, don't you understand? When elves mate, they mate for life, so that means."
He cried to you rougher you feel his hard cock rubbing into your own sex with a need want to be inside you. 
"You will be mine for the rest of your life. I will ensure that. If you don't want to be mine, it's pretty simple- you don't have to."
 You blink this as he lets you sit up, but he still stands between your legs.
"You mean you'll just let me go. You won't do anything?"
 You look at him, hoping that this is some weird pass, and you would know he would just leave you alone. But your hopes are soon crushed.
"oh no, my darling, if you say no," 
he moves in closer, and his sword falls at the back of your neck. 
"I will kill you and make sure you are raised as a zombie who has no free will and who is forced to do my bidding for the rest of your Undead life. Do you understand me, my cute little rabbit?"
 At that, you feel a heat emanating from his sword, a Blackness clouding around the edges of your eyes, and you know that his promise holds truth. Your body goes rigid and shakes, and tears silently stream down your eyes as he takes you in his arms, rubbing your back oddly comfortingly or trying to be with his sword. His other hand grips your bottom, pulling you closer as he snuggles into your neck, inhaling your scent.
"so you decide to make, my darling. Either I can have you here of your own free will, where I will love and protect you in this Tavern, or I will have the pleasure of seeing your beautiful blood dripping down your chest. I can have you as my perfect little Undead doll."
 "The choice is yours. You pretty little rabbit."
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nobodysdaydreams · 18 days
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Explaining fandoms I’m not in, but I have seen on my dash from the mutuals (to the best of my knowledge based on their posts):
Why? Because I thought it would be fun and entertaining and I hope I’m not wrong.
The Magnus Archives (TMA)- a group of people document creepy and supernatural events while they slowly one by one discover either that they are the monsters/possessed by them, or that they are being taken in by the monsters, or that their coworkers are the monsters, or that they themselves are possibly friends with or dating the monsters, or that they have been working for the monsters (or bad guys) the entire time. Many of the villains seem to be demented or possessed life sized toys and clowns or eyeballs. This podcast has so many episodes, and I see so many posts about it, but these seem to be the common themes.
Miraculous Ladybug- actually haven’t seen this one on my dash in a long time, but when I first did, despite appearing like a straightforward kids fandom, the shipping discourse confused the heck out of me. But if I have this right, based on the posts from my younger followers, two teenagers are animal themed superheroes who are dating each other and also have crushes on each other, but they don’t know they are dating each other, because they don’t know each others secret identities, because… okay, I still honestly have no idea why. There are ~5K posts about this apparently very central and specific plot line, but not one explains why they don’t just tell each other who they are??? Anything for the plot, I guess. Apparently this has been going on for a long time to the point where even the show’s target audience of children is confused as to how these teenagers and grown adults haven’t put the pieces together as to who everyone’s secret identity is.
Keeper of the Lost Cities (KOTLC)- there’s a girl named Sophie. She is an elf in a love triangle with Keefe and some other guy (I think his name is Fritz). Keefe’s parents are terrible, especially his mom. Sophie has horse DNA (I don’t know if that post was a joke or not sorry if that’s wrong). There’s an elf with fire powers. Elves read minds. There’s a group called the black swan who are the good guys, I think. Also I think the elves and humans are at war. I know Keefe’s parents are trash, does Sophie have parents? From what I can tell, she grows up believing she’s a human but then surprise! She’s an elf and the chosen one, and elves are possibly immortal? Wait, maybe Sophie’s a half elf. Is that a thing?
Spy x Family - two people are fake dating each other for spy reasons but eventually fall in love for real. The twist is, they each think the other is a normal civilian who doesn’t know about the fake relationship (which is kinda messed up to make someone fall in love with you for a fake cover but if they’re also doing the same to you that’s karma I guess) but I think it might end up ok, because they fall in love for real (Aw) but possibly also not okay, because I also think it might be revealed that they’ve been working for enemy sides this whole time (drama). Also the adopted daughter is a mind reader who knows everything but chooses to keep what she knows secret for the plot. Respect. And I recently saw something about the family having a super powered dog? Is he real?
The Murderbot Diaries - a bunch of robots are created for one purpose: murder. But when their murder programming goes haywire, they discover that they might have more in common with the humans they’ve been assigned to kill than they originally thought. Or that they have more humanity inside themselves than they thought… or maybe that the people who created them have more evil intentions than… well in hindsight, “the people who build the murder robots are evil!” seems like an obvious plot twist, but maybe they’re more morally complex or had decent intentions and just never intended for it to go this far… or maybe the robots get hacked or decide maybe they don’t want to be murder bots anymore which brings us back to free will. Interesting philosophical questions, but I think the robots might be getting into some wacky shenanigans as well. Also they apparently have diaries. I get that a diary is just like… a log of what they’re doing, but that won’t stop me from imaging a big scary robot with a little pink glitter pen writing “Dear Diary, I killed three people today. I still see their faces when I try to power off at night. When I go into sleep mode, I dream of their faces. I begin to wonder things, like whether they had families, dreams, or ambitions. I also wonder what they felt in their final moments. I fear this means I am developing a conscience and desire to turn against my programming and the creators. But probably nothing a little update and restart can’t fix. I’ll keep you updated, dairy. XOXO, Murderbot 💕” So. How did I do? Scale of 1-10, with 10 being “you nailed it!” and 1 being “None of this is remotely close. What posts have you been looking at?”
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