#elk plays tsw

[elkian]

asfdfhgjhkl GOD

While I did have fun with the Portal-2-style jumping pad puzzle, and there were some fun nods like the ominous blood stains, FUCK In The Dusky Dark

who thought it was okay to just chain quests together without asking in this game because um??? i’d say “fight me” but the evil mastermind behind this shit is probably too powerful and sadistic for me

like you get thrown into the underPyramid. Sure. It’s an Instance, sure.

It’s about 5 different puzzle-choked mazes thrown together. Sure.

How the fuck am I supposed to leave and come back?? I had to complete the entire thing in one run! It took over an hour and probably far longer if I hadn’t managed to scrounge up (collectively) one decent guide! I still have no fucking clue how the Leap of Faith segment matches the sheet you get, I just followed someone else’s work!

(Sidenote: Nothing says “this game is British” like “collecting” priceless Egyptian burial artifacts to put in a museum. Like yeah the owner of the Pyramid in question is a huge dick, and yeah, the whole thing is an Indiana Jones reference, but come on! Esp. since Scorched Desert did actually, yanno, touch on the whole matter of the constant thieving Britain did to Egypt and probably still doing!) (Sidenote the second, give it back Britain!!)

and then there’s a fuckin boss fight, and yeah, it was clever and wouldn’t have been too bad if it hadn’t come after over an hour slog through a dungeon I didn’t dare leave lest I have to redo it all over again.

Fuck that quest.

#elk text #3rd #July #2021 #July 3rd 2021 #elk plays secret world legends #elk plays tsw legends #elk plays tsw #and I missed lore so I have to go back #that fucking sucked #the mummy maze is functionally worthless by the time you reach it tbh #all of those elements already showed up #and you're sick of most of them #like yeah getting through is exhilirating but circling a wall over and over to kite a slow-ass mummy away #bc i pressed the wrong button and need to redo #is super annoying

[elkian]

The Secret World is a good game but I am so fucking over the missions that hand you an alternate weapon set and you’re stuck with it until whatever passes

#elk text #20th #May #2021 #May 20th 2021 #i dont care how good the explosives are that was NERVE-WRACKING #elk plays tsw

[elkian]

speaking of things that hit different in 2021 i finally got back on Secret World Legends and it turns out I was in Egypt and.... hoo boy some of this is a liiiiittle close to home

#elk text #17th #May #2021 #May 17th 2021 #they were warning us #hrgh #elk plays tsw

[elkian]

i love every scorched desert NPC

#elk text #21st #May #2021 #May 21st 2021 #i think the only one i haven't met yet is nassir #elk plays tsw legends #elk plays tsw #yes of course saiid is my fave what do you take me for #theyre all great tho #not the cutscene specific dudes for story mode FUCK THEM #that is the point of their existence i hope theyre a boss battle #or fall out and kill each other in the process #if anything happens to zhana im killing everyone in this desert and then myself #also the gay academics re-enacting The Mummy.... good

[elkian]

.....so i can’t cap the Besieged Farmlands exploration without wandering into the Lair. For. FOUR. LOcations.

Why, Funcom? Why?

#elk text #5th #June #2021 #June 5th 2021 #elk plays tsw #i feel like this didn't happen in previous areas??? #why would you do this #i already had to deal with hunting brother razvan down #the freaking entrances are guarded by mega-deathless even!!

[elkian]

getting back into TSW has been fun but somehow I now can’t ignore that nearly every character is doing an accent and, for some reason, they only used takes with the accent getting dropped 50%+ of the time for the cutscenes xD

#elk text #5th #June #2021 #June 5th 2021 #elk plays tsw #partly it's more noticeable bc the VAs are apparently from the UK #so their natural accents are less familiar to me #also Sam Krieg #who lives in MAINE #having a thick Southern accent half the time is hilarious #that said i do admire the effort involved to have the relevant local language in each area #it's not perfect but it's noticeable

[elkian]

Hello it has been almost 24 hours and I am STILL Losing My Shit(TM) over Angry Earth/Voice of Klein in TSW.

Specifically, the bit where Klein starts talking about interrogating you and it’s like.... good luck, asshole! I’m behind 7 levels of silent protagonist! 😶

#elk text #3rd #June #2021 #June 3rd 2021 #elk plays tsw #between the orochi laptop lampshading with 'we're both too proud [for you to respond]' #and the pre-fight setup #it's just #it can't possibly be an accident #beautiful