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#eddie wants to destroy something out of jealousy
andvys · 1 month
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Dancing with our hands tied | S.H.
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Chapter eight ⭐︎ Say my name and everything just stops
Warnings: 18+, minors don't interact! jealousy, angst, low self-esteem (kinda?), mentions of the upside down. weed and alcohol consumption. I will not spoiler anything here, so read with caution
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Summary: You blindly began to follow your feelings, hanging onto a hope that died just as quickly as it came.
Word count: 10k+
Author's note: @hellfire--cult and I came up with this whole idea and we kept talking about this moment for weeks and now its finally here, I hope you guys are gonna enjoy it as much as we did hehe
Series Masterlist ⭐︎ Previous Chapter ⭐︎ Next Chapter
The spring wind blows through the open windows in your room, touching your skin and slightly lifting the ends of your new dress. The smell of vanilla and the floral scent of your perfume lingers in the air. You’re leaning closer to your mirror as you apply your favorite gloss to your lips. 
A tingling, exciting feeling bubbles in your stomach, your heart jumping every few seconds or so at the thought of seeing him today. 
Steve’s reactions were everything you were hoping for when you teased him at the diner and in his car, yesterday. His blushing cheeks and the wide, darkened eyes filled you with victory after you had placed a kiss upon his flushed skin. You are still not sure what had caused you the sudden rush of courage, but you’re glad that it hit you because the way he looked at you, the way he reacted, the way his breath hitched in his throat finally gave you the last push to do what you had always wanted to do. Today, you’re finally going to give in to your feelings. 
The nervous, insecure part of you is telling you that there is still a big chance that he might reject you, that you will ruin this thing between you both by making the final move. 
And usually that weak part of your mind would win, it would fill you with enough humiliating images to pull back, to make you rethink your decision, to keep you hiding in the shadows, the way you always did. 
But you’re no longer letting it win. 
You will do this, even if you might lose your dignity. 
Placing the lip gloss back on your vanity, you reach for your favorite necklace, and put it on. You touch up your hair one last time, fixing your bangs before you take a step back, eying the red and white sundress, the little bows on the straps, the dainty flowers on the material, the shortness of it that exposes enough of your skin to drive him crazy… you hope. 
‘Just make your move, babe. Do you really think King Steve would reject you?’
Your smile falls a little when Billy’s voice echoes in your mind. 
Every memory of your best friend brings a hurtful pang to your heart. 
He was the only one who knew about your feelings for Steve and surprisingly he kept encouraging you to ask him out, to make your move. 
Would he be proud of you now? 
Or would he still make fun of you for liking someone like Steve? 
You step away from the mirror and walk over to the window, closing it before you leave your room and make your way downstairs. Eddie isn’t picking you up for once, even though he called you three times already, asking if he should come pick you up and if you’re truly feeling good enough to drive yourself again – you are. The headaches are gone, the dizziness is gone too. All that is left are the nightmares and the sudden rushes of anxiety but you are okay, you feel okay. 
You walk over to the dresser in your hallway, reaching inside the key bowl to retrieve your car keys when something else catches your eye. The one single key, lying in there, you reach for it, furrowing your brows as you trace your finger along the metal, letting it fall in your palm. 
You still remember the day when Max had showed up at your house, asking for you to take Billy’s car before Neil would destroy it in a moment of rage. 
‘He’d want you to have it anyway.’ She said as she handed you the keys. 
You remember how you broke down crying the moment you got into the driver's seat. You missed your best friend and it felt so wrong to sit in the place that once belonged to him. 
You got the windshield fixed and anything else that needed to be repaired, before you parked it in your garage, planning to never open the gate again and just leave the car there until Max would ask for it back. And, you did leave it there, for a few weeks at least. 
Your car broke down on a hot Friday afternoon and the mechanic at the local shop told you that it would take a few weeks to get it fixed. You walked and used the bus for a few days, and then the rain and the storms crashed upon Hawkins, giving you no choice but to take the blue Camaro.
Max even joked about it, she told you that it was Billy who caused your car to break down and who somehow let it rain and storm over the town so you would finally take his beloved car out for a ride because it’s just too pretty to be hidden and locked away in a dark, cold garage.
You’d sometimes drive around at night, when the streets were empty and no one was around. 
When you visited your sister in Indianapolis, you took his car. 
But now it’s been a while, the last time you sat behind that steering wheel was right before the apocalypse almost hit the town. 
A sigh falls from your lips as you stare at the key. 
“Not today,” you murmur as you place it back where it laid before and reach for your keys. 
The drive to Eddie’s new place isn’t a long one, he only lives a few streets away from you now, it would only be a ten minute walk but you desperately waited for the moment when you could finally drive again, and you didn’t want to pass up on the opportunity today. 
You missed this, sitting behind the steering wheel, instead of the passenger seat, longing to be the one in control. You missed picking the music yourself – not that Eddie’s music taste is a bad one, you just need a mix of everything, not just rock and heavy metal, sometimes you just need a girly pop song – not that you would ever admit it to him. 
When you arrive at your destination and you pull up to Eddie’s driveway, you notice that Steve’s car isn’t there yet. Only Jonathan’s car is parked next to Eddie’s Impala. 
Steve is never late, yesterday being the first time that he was the last one to arrive, so he is either still waiting for Robin or… running late is his new thing. 
“There she is!” Eddie chuckles as opens the front door at the same time as you get out of your car, “and she’s here in one piece!” 
A laugh tumbles from your lips as you close the door and lock your car before you make your way over to him, eying the new shirt he’s wearing – which is just another band tee that you have never heard of before. His curly hair up in a bun and a can of beer in his hand.
“I’m a good driver, what are you talking about, Eds?”
He furrows his brows, lips curling into an amused smile, “are you?” 
You walk up the steps to his porch, greeting him with an eye roll, “you know what, next time I’ll pick you up.”
He smirks, using his index finger to point at your car. 
“What, with your baby Mustang over there?” 
You squint your eyes at him, “nope, I’ll take the hidden gem in my garage.” 
“Wait what… What hidden gem?” 
“You’ll find out,” you wink at him, trying to brush past him when he stops you, placing his hand on your arm, he pulls you back softly. 
“Wait.”
You raise your brows at him, “yes?” 
He’s got the twinkle in his eyes, the one he always has when he’s happy about something. His lip twitches, pale cheeks slowly changing color, he’s barely able to contain his excitement as he bounces on his feet.
“Guess who scored a date?” 
Your eyes widen, lips parting as you remember the pretty waitress from the diner. 
Eddie is blushing, lips now curling into a full smile. 
“Oh my god, really?” You ask as a grin appears on your face. 
“Yeah! I’m gonna take her out tomorrow night, I can’t fucking wait, sweets.” He says with a dreamy look in his eyes. “She was so sweet a-and fuck… she’s gorgeous, don’t know how she said yes to me.” 
You frown at him, reaching your hand out to pinch his cheek, “you’re a handsome, sweet boy, Edward, now shush. You’re gonna knock her off her feet. Any girl would be lucky to have you.” 
His eyes soften, he rubs the back of his neck before his fingers trace the scar on the side – you know that it’s now an insecurity of his, just like it is one of yours. Scars litter your skin from where a bat had left a gnarly wound on the back of your shoulder, from where Jason had hurt you, from where he had left reminders for you that he was the one who did this to you. 
But your scars aren’t nearly half as bad as all the ones on his skin. 
“I’ve never been on a date before,” he murmurs, eyes flashing with doubt. 
“So? It’s gonna be even more special then,” you shrug.
“I just don’t wanna mess it up.” 
“You won’t,” you smile at him, “you’ve got that special charm, one that makes others like you right away, you’re funny and you’re sweet, now stop doubting yourself or I’ll kick your ass and hunt down every asshole who ever made you feel otherwise.” 
He chuckles at your words, though his eyes are still soft as he looks at you. He doesn’t doubt you, he knows that you would actually hunt down every name on the list of people who hurt him. 
“Got it?” 
“Got it.”
“Good,” you say, sternly.
“Good,” he nods. 
You stare at each other for a moment before you both burst into giggles. He wraps his arm around your shoulder and he pulls you inside his house, narrowing his eyes as he takes in your dress.
“Who’d you dress up for, sweets?” He asks, “there’s no hot guys here.” 
“Well, aren’t you humble?” 
“No hot guys besides me, of course,” he corrects himself after clearing his throat, smirking at you. 
You only shake your head in response. 
You pass by the kitchen and the big shelf that was specifically customized for Wayne’s mug collection. Vinyls are on the walls in the long hallway that leads to the living room where you hear the chatter of your friends and the faint music that sounds through the house. 
The smell of weed already lingering in the air. 
The sound of Nancy’s giggle, followed by a voice you hadn’t heard in a while makes you furrow your brows.
“Argyle is back?” 
Your surprised voice along with the wide eyes you look at him with make him chuckle. He knew you weren’t paying attention when he told you about it days back. You were too distracted by whatever daydream you were stuck in as he let both you and Steve know that Argyle was coming back to spend the summer in Hawkins before going off to college in September – something that Eddie definitely won’t be doing, he won’t be going to college, he won’t be going anywhere, at least not now, not yet, maybe not ever, even though it’s all he ever wanted. 
He walked the stupid stage, he snatched his diploma and he finally flipped Higgins the bird, despite the glares, despite the whispers of the people who still blamed him for what had happened weeks back but it doesn’t matter, he tells himself. It doesn’t matter what they say or think because he got people who believed him, people who care about him, people who were willing to fight for him, people who are worth staying for. 
“Yeah, he’s here the whole summer.” 
“Ooh, means we’re gonna get high a lot, cool,” you giggle. 
“Like we don’t do that all that time,” Eddie rolls his eyes, though a smile tugs at his lips as he pushes towards the living room, your feet carrying you closer and closer to your friends. 
Despite Steve not being here yet, you already feel the rush of excitement mixed with the nervousness of what you plan on doing, flushing through your veins. 
Your eyes first fall on Jonathan and Nancy who are standing by the door that leads out into Eddie’s backyard, his arm wrapped around her shoulder, a smile tugging at her lips when she sees you. 
“Hi!” She waves at you, a friendly look on her face. 
“Hey,” you smile at her before you look over at her boyfriend, greeting him as well. You then turn your head to your right, your smile widening when your eyes meet Argyle’s already very dazed ones.
He stands up from his seat on the couch, his hair falling in front of his face a little, he opens his arms, revealing his Bob Marley shirt to you. 
“Well look at what the cat dragged in,” he jokes as he steps towards you, “come here, chica.” 
You chuckle, leaving Eddie’s side to greet Argyle, who instantly pulls you into a tight hug. The smell of weed enveloping you, right away.
“I didn’t know you’d be back so soon!” 
“So soon?” He slurs, patting your head when you pull back again, chuckling when you swat his hand away. “You didn’t miss me?” He jokes as he wraps his arm around your shoulder, just the way Eddie did before, he pulls something out of his pocket, handing it to you, “here, got you a little gift from California.” 
Your eyes lighten up in amusement, a smile tugging at your lips as you look at the blunt he’s holding, you take it, holding it up as you look up at him with a grin, “why thanks.” 
“You gotta share that one with me,” Jonathan grins at you, lazily. 
“You’ve had enough already,” Nancy rolls her eyes, though not without a smile on her lips. She pats his chest, “come on, let’s go outside.” 
“Yeah, you guys go ahead, I’m gonna grab some more drinks,” Eddie says before he leaves the living room. 
You all step out into the backyard, walking over to the little fire pit where the flames are already glowing, surrounded by the comfortable seats. The sound of water flowing from the stream filling the air with a fresh scent, the smell of flowers and the trees giving you a sense of peace. 
Eddie’s backyard is comforting and nice, despite being close to the forest, it’s making you feel safe. He wouldn’t have this now if he hadn’t been dragged into a world of darkness – unlike you, he didn’t grow up in wealth, he didn’t have a fancy house, a fancy backyard with a pool. No. Eddie grew up in a lonesome house, one that certainly wasn’t as luxurious as yours or the one he lives in now. The house he grew up in was haunted by painful memories of his mother that he lost at a way too young age and his father who came and went as he pleased, it was the only thing that he had, the only thing he called his own, but that was taken from him too and he had no choice but to move in with his Uncle Wayne, who had done everything to give him a home – and now, Eddie gave him that back, he gave Wayne a home, a nice house with a nice roof over his head, a garden that he always wanted to have. Eddie had tried to keep the upside down a secret, he didn’t want to talk about what was out there, he didn’t want to worry him, he didn’t want to tell him where all the money actually came from but Wayne isn’t stupid and Eddie isn’t exactly the best at keeping secrets from the people he loves and cares about. 
You wonder what you would have told your parents if they were still here – would you have told them the truth about what actually happened at the Creel house? Or would you have kept it all a secret? You are certainly much better at keeping secrets hidden. Eddie couldn’t even look Wayne in the eyes when he told him that the bite marks on his skin came from a rabid dog and not from interdimensional bats. 
Something cold touches your shoulder, making you flinch in surprise. You tilt your head up, meeting the eyes of your best friend again, “where’s your head at, sweets?” He chuckles, holding the can of diet pepsi out to you. 
With furrowed brows, you look down at the drink and reach for it, “thanks,” you murmur, “and uh, nowhere. I’m just fascinated by your backyard.” 
His dimples show when a laugh escapes him, he takes a seat beside you, snatching away the blunt from your lap, he places it between his lips and uses his red lighter to light it up. He lets out a content sigh as he leans back, puffing out the smoke into the sky before he takes a look around, “it’s nice isn’t it?” 
You nod, pulling the tab on your pepsi, it opens with a pop. 
“It’s better than mine.” 
He turns his head to look at you, a bewildered look on his face, “you’re crazy, sweets. You got a pool.”
“You got one too!” You chuckle, pointing to the pool that has yet to be used, it’s warm out, not hot yet. 
“Yeah, well yours is fucking huge, and you got a hot tub too!” 
“You got a hot tub, chica?” Argyle gasps from your right, “oh, you’re rich rich.” 
“Correction, my parents were rich.” 
“Correction, we’re all rich now,” Jonathan adds, pointing at you with a dazed smile. 
“Rich isn’t exactly the term I would use,” Nancy mumbles as she takes a sip of her soda. 
“Then what term would you use, Wheeler?” Eddie asks, shaking his head at her, “enlighten us.” 
Nancy clears her throat, placing her elbow on the wooden armrest, “we’re taken care of.” 
Jonathan snorts, putting his hand on her thigh as he gives her an amused smile, while she already rolls her eyes at whatever is about to leave his mouth – there’s no annoyance behind her eyes though, no tension in her body from where he touched her, unlike with Steve, who she always looked tense and irritated with. Back then you didn’t understand why, there were so many questions in your mind when you watched them and when she left him – how could anyone be irritated with Steve? How could anyone be tense with someone that provides so much love and warmth to the people he so deeply cares about? How could she leave him? How could she break his heart? Who could ever hurt Steve Harrington? 
“Just admit it, we’re rich.” 
A groan echoes through the backyard, one that doesn’t belong to Eddie, Nancy or anyone else sitting in the circle. You all turn your heads towards the house, finding a very annoyed Robin making her way over to you, a six pack of beers in her hand, sunglasses perched on her nose even though the sun is starting to go down already. 
Eddie isn’t surprised at her barging into his home, she does it all the time, to him, to you, to Steve, he doesn’t mind it though. 
You straighten your back, holding your drink tighter as you look away from her, waiting for Steve to walk through the door. 
The feelings inside of you start to rise again, your heart picking up the pace as your skin starts burning from the excitement.
Robin plops down in the seat next to Eddie, placing the beers on the ground as she slumps back, sighing loudly. 
Everyone’s watching her, expecting a rant already but you’re still fixated on the door, waiting for him. 
“Buckley, why so angry?” 
She pulls her sunglasses up into her hair, turning to face him, “I’m glad you asked,” she murmurs as she reaches for one of the beers, “Dingus ditched me, so I had to walk all the way here!” She throws her arms up dramatically. 
You furrow your brows at her words, the burning on your skin beginning to die down just as fast as it came. 
Argyle and Jonathan chuckle at her. 
“You live 3 blocks away from here…” Nancy mumbles. 
“Not the point, Nance,” she argues, glaring at her friend. 
“Wait, so Steve isn’t coming?” Jonathan slurs. 
Your eyes are wide and hopeful, your hand clutching the can tighter as you dig your feet into the grass beneath you, a weird feeling settling in the pit of your stomach. 
“Wetting his dick with Heidi seems more fucking important today,” she grumbles, rolling her eyes as she raises the beer to her lips. 
Your heart drops. 
The burning in your skin disappears completely as the fire is replaced by ice, the coldness of it freezing your whole body, stopping your heart and taking the false hope away as it kills every feeling that had taken home inside of you just seconds ago. 
Your eyes are stuck on her like you’re waiting, waiting for her to laugh and say it was a joke, that he will be here soon, that he isn’t out with some other girl after what happened between you and him yesterday. 
“Whoa, what?” Eddie mumbles, holding his hands up, “so… he’s on a date with the girl he didn’t want to keep seeing?” 
“Yep.”
Every ounce of excitement is now replaced by the sickness in your stomach, the lump in your throat that makes you struggle to breathe. 
What were you thinking? 
That the game you played wasn't just a game to him? That it was something more than that? That he wanted you just the way you always wanted him? That he could ever feel something for you? 
You don’t know whether you want to laugh at yourself or cry. 
How saddening it is to long for someone who was forced to like you. 
While you were getting ready, making yourself look pretty for him, thinking that he might like you in this dress – he was getting ready to take out another girl, a girl that he chose to like. 
You slowly slump back in your seat when Eddie’s laughter pulls you back into reality. You blink, masking the shocked, pained look on your face with a relaxed one as you take a sip of your drink, hoping that it will get rid of the lump sitting in your throat – it doesn’t. Nothing does. 
Your friends move on to another topic, while you stay there, where you will stay for a while now. The pain of the rejection that has never even taken place, slowly sinking in and everything around you begins to suffocate you – the dress you are wearing, the necklace around your neck, even the presence of your friends. 
You don’t want to be here any longer, you need to be alone. 
But you can’t go, not now, not yet. 
It would be too soon, too obvious and they can’t know, no one can know about your feelings for Steve, about how much it hurts to feel that way for him. 
So you hide the pain as best as you can, you nod along to your friends' conversation, you speak and you laugh when you have to, even when everything inside of you wants you to cry both out of sadness and anger. 
You’re not even angry at him, you couldn’t be angry at him even if you tried to be. He doesn’t know about your feelings – if he did, he wouldn’t have filled you with false hope, you know he wouldn’t. 
He wouldn’t string you along, you know he’s not the type of person to do something like that, not even to you. But you really thought that you had something, that there was something between you, that’s why you let your walls crumble, that’s why you started acting upon your feelings, that’s why you were ready to do more than just the subtle touches and the flirtations. 
You wait, you wait for the right moment to leave, when everyone is distracted enough, you get up, after whispering an apology, a lie into Eddie’s ear, knowing that he doesn’t believe you, that he will probably call you later or even show up to check on you. But he lets you go. 
And as you leave your friends, making your way back into the house, their laughter echoes in your ears, their happy voices and the cheerfulness they’re all feeling, that you were supposed to feel too. 
You blink back the tears, not wanting them to fall just yet. 
You make your way back to your car, not wasting a second to start it and drive home, your vision blurred and your throat hurting from how much you want to cry. 
How foolish it was of you to think that you could ever stand a chance – there was never one to begin with. You will always be the one in the shadows, the one to secretly watch him, the one to secretly want him, the one with the jealousy and the heartache, the one wishing to be anyone but herself because maybe then, he would want you too. 
The smell of smoke from the campfire is now lingering on your clothes and in your hair, tears are now falling freely, ruining the makeup that you have spent hours on, the makeup that you can’t wait to wash off now. 
You don’t even want to think about him. 
You don’t want to ask yourself what he’s doing now. 
He touched you so softly, so subtly, and yet it did everything to set your insides on fire, to make you feel special, even if only for a short moment. 
Now he is touching someone else, in far more special ways. 
A frustrated sigh falls from your lips when you step inside your home, it’s cold and empty, something that you have felt like for a very long time until he started the fire inside of you, only to make it die again… and all without his knowledge. 
You walk up the stairs and past your room, going straight into the bathroom, feeling the need to wash away the day, as though it could ease the aching in your chest. You start the shower before you turn to the sink, not even bothering to look at your reflection in the mirror, it would only make you feel more pathetic. 
You can feel the hot tears rolling down your cheeks, the quivering in your bottom lip. 
You hate this, you hate the sadness that you shouldn’t be feeling in the first place. 
You got no reason to be sad, you should have put your feelings aside, knowing that nothing would ever come out of it. 
It was all so obvious, it was just teasing, nothing more, nothing less. Nothing ever happened, so why would it happen now? He just found another way of messing with you, so that you two wouldn’t go at each other's throats like before.
You just have to go back. No more teasing like this. No more letting yourself get sucked into delusions. He is just having fun while you crave something more with him and get hopeful. 
You aren’t having fun. You wanted more.
You have no choice but to go back to how you were before this… thing started. 
Once your makeup is off and your dress is now laying on the bathroom floor, you step inside the shower, letting the warmth envelope you, hoping for a sense of comfort from it. 
Standing there for a moment, you let the water rain upon your skin, matching the pace of your tears that you’re willing away. 
You will hunt Billy in the afterlife for making you believe that King Steve could ever want you. 
You use your scented shampoo, hoping that it will get rid of the smell of smoke in your hair. You love campfire’s but you can’t stand the stench it leaves on your clothes and your hair. 
Your hands run over your smooth skin as you wash your body, reminding you of the fact that you even shaved this morning – you couldn’t feel more stupid than you do right now. 
Despite the loudness of your own voice cursing at you inwardly and the water hitting the glass, you hear the sound of your doorbell going off – multiple times. 
“What the fuck,” you murmur in confusion. 
It keeps ringing again and again – once, twice and it stops after a third time before it turns into rapid knocking. 
You know it isn’t Eddie, he wouldn’t even have the patience to ring your doorbell and wait for you to open, he’d just barge right in. 
You’d choose to ignore it if the person outside wasn’t so goddamn persistent. 
You turn off the shower, squeezing the water from your hair before you get out, and wrap a towel around your body. The mirror is fogged, as the rest of the room is, you open the door and step out into the hallway, that now feels colder than before. 
The knocking continues, filling you with anger. 
Who shows up at night, knocking like a mad man? 
Maybe you shouldn’t make your way downstairs now, maybe you shouldn’t open the door to whoever it is on the other side. It could be anyone or anything but you doubt that Vecna came back from the dead to knock on doors now and hunt you of all people – he could have done that weeks back, you went through enough trauma, he could have easily chosen you but even he didn’t want you. 
You rip open the door, ready to curse and yell at whoever is terrorizing you at this hour but every word gets caught in your throat and even your breathing halts for a second as your glassy eyes meet the hazel ones that you have been missing all day. Frustration and anger swirling inside them, blazing fire raging behind his eyes. His cheeks are slightly flushed, his chest rising up and down heavily as he stands on your porch, looking better than ever. 
“Steve?” His name tumbles out of your mouth before you can stop it as you stare at him in confusion. 
He eyes you up and down, taking in the sight of your exposed skin that is still dripping with water before he clenches his jaw, raising his hand to run his fingers through his hair, tugging at it. 
Steve Harrington is fucked. He is utterly fucked. You have cursed him in every way possible, he can’t get you out of his mind, he can’t get you out of his system and the thought that you were only playing with him drove him insane. His hunger for you made him desperate, desperate for release. 
So in his state of frustration and desperation, he called up Heidi, thinking that a date and sex with a girl he had been with before would help him move on and stop thinking about you but who was he fooling. He couldn’t even kiss her when she leaned in to greet him with her lips, he dodged her. He couldn’t even listen to the things she was telling him after they ordered their drinks. He couldn’t care less about her. All he could think about was you. All he wanted was you. He wanted your lips to kiss him, he wanted your hands to touch him, he wanted your body under his and the more he thought about it, the more he stopped caring about a possible humiliation after he’d finally make a move on you, he needed you, and he needed to try – if you’d reject him, then so be it, at least he would know and not live with the what if’s in his head. 
He canceled the date in the middle of it, not caring about how messed up that was. He drove her home and without a second thought, he drove here, he came to you. 
And now, you’re standing in front of him, in nothing but a towel, water rolling down your soft skin, big eyes filled with confusion, lips parted, lips that he wants to kiss until he grows breathless. 
The sight in front of him does little to make any of this easier for him. You look like you’ve just walked out of one the dreams he had about you. 
“You gotta be kidding me,” he murmurs under his breath, surprising you when he invites himself into your home, brushing past you with an intensity that almost knocks you off your feet. 
You blink, turning around abruptly, a bewildered look replacing your confused one. 
As you take in the sight of him, your sadness begins to dissolve as the anger you started to miss floods through your veins the longer you look at him. 
You slam the door shut when the wind causes goosebumps to rise on your skin, you hold the towel tighter against your body as you glare at him, “what the fuck?”
“I have to be the one to say that!” He argues.
“Excuse me?” You scoff, your face now burning with rage. Every second that passes now makes you forget about the tears you just shed over him, irritation sparking inside of you so wildly that you want nothing more than to kick him out of your house for behaving that way towards you for no reason. “Weren’t you on a date with… Heidi?” 
Steve clenches his jaw at the mocking voice, at the smirk now tugging on your lips. He chuckles, though not in amusement, he points a finger at you, “see, that’s what I’m fucking talking about!”
Your brows knit together at his outburst, the fire in his eyes growing stronger and bigger. 
“Harrington, if you came to yell nonesense at me, just fucking leave!” You roll your eyes and turn away from him, making your way back towards the stairs. 
But his scoff stops you. 
“Oh, so you keep running away huh!? Didn’t you already get over that!?” 
You turn around with nothing but anger boiling inside of you, “running away!? From what!?”
This should have been enough to make him turn around and leave, because clearly nothing changed, clearly this is still just a game to you – but he has hope, and he is desperate enough to throw every bit of his dignity away and risk something. 
“Oh, don’t play fucking dumb right now. Acting like that for two weeks and pretending to be stupid is not a good look on you, Blondie.” 
You take in a sharp breath, digging your fingers into your towel as you frown at him. 
What does he want from you? 
Why did he come here? 
Was the date so bad, was the sex so awful that he had to come here to torture you? 
Without another word, you turn around and you stomp up the stairs, not wanting to see him, not wanting to hear his voice anymore. 
Your heart starts pounding in your chest again, and you can’t help but wonder – did he figure you out? Did he figure out your feelings? Is that why he is here? To confront you about them? To reject you?
You feel more and more stupid about what you had wanted to do when you woke up this morning. 
Just when your feet carry you up to the second floor, and you rush across the hallway to walk into your room, his footsteps echo behind you, making you more irritated than before. You turn around to face him, but before you can even say anything, Steve is suddenly right in front of you, and his hands reach out to grab your waist, he pushes you against the wall behind you, gently, careful not to hurt you. 
The gasp that falls from your lips startles you. His hands that touch the only thing that covers your body leaving your skin on fire. Your heart rate picks up so rapidly that it nearly steals your breath away. You look up into his golden brown orbs, the ones that are nearly black as he steps even closer, invading your space completely, making you breathe in the scent of his cologne, the one that has butterflies swirling in your stomach. 
He catches you off guard completely. 
You feel so vulnerable, so exposed as you stand there, caged in by his arms, his breath on your skin, his eyes that are filled with so much hunger. 
The words die on your tongue, and yet, after you breathe in more of his scent, you open your mouth to speak. 
“Shut up, Blondie… Just shut up for a second,” he murmurs, interrupting whatever words you had prepared to lie to him with. 
His right hand leaves your waist, inching closer to your stomach as his fingers trace the hem of your towel, drool already forming in his mouth at the sight of you, he is ready to take you, ready to devour you and make you scream his name before he fucks you for only this time. 
He notices the way your chest is moving, the way your breathing stutters. 
“W-What are you doing, perv?” You stutter as you watch him play with the opening of your towel. 
He can’t help but laugh, shaking his head at your insult. 
“Perv? Are you going to continue to play fucking dumb?” 
“Dumb? You are the dumb one if you think that I’m going to be the one to break into your teasing.” 
Steve’s eyes flash with satisfaction. 
This is what he wanted – to hear you admit that you were playing that game with him after all and not because you were playing him and stringing him along just to turn him down to gain something from it, whatever it might be. No. You were doing just what he was hoping for, all along. 
You want him just as much as he wants you and that’s all he needs to know. 
You roll your eyes at him, turning your head as you try to push your way out of his grasp but before you can even step away from him, his hands stop you but not on your waist this time. His large hands cup your cheeks, making you freeze. You stare at him wide eyed when he brings you closer, and you can’t even react before his whole body is suddenly pressed against yours, your heartbeat lurches into your throat. 
As though his touch wasn’t shocking enough, his next move almost causes you to collapse, because now it isn’t only his body against yours, his hands on your cheeks or his breath on your skin, now it’s his lips… his lips on yours, his lips moving against yours in desperation as he takes every last of your breath and makes it his own. 
You can’t do anything, you can’t move, you can’t breathe, you can’t even blink as you stare at him – how his eyes are closed and his cheeks are flushed, the furrowed brows as he kisses you with a kind of passion no one has ever kissed you with before. 
Steve is kissing you. 
Steve Harrington is kissing you. 
His lips are moving roughly against yours, his hands holding your cheeks so softly, yet with an intensity. 
This is all you ever wanted, to feel his touch and his lips on yours but you are too stunned to move, too surprised to kiss him back right now, too distracted wondering if this is real or not.
Along with the shock, you feel the slightest bit of insecurity flooding through you because even though he is kissing you, you can’t help but wonder why. Why isn’t he with Heidi? Why isn’t he kissing her right now? Did she turn him down? Did he come here because he just needed someone? Because he knew that you would fall for this? Or is this just another way for him to tease you? 
Those questions prompt you to push him away, forcing him to break the kiss that he was so deeply lost in. 
You notice the way he begrudgingly pulls away, the way he seems so drawn to your lips, the way his brows furrow in confusion now, his face is flushed and his pupils dilated as he looks at you with nothing but desperation in his eyes – he isn’t teasing, he wants you, he wants you right now and isn’t that all that matters? That he wants you?
His eyes stare into yours as he is breathing heavily. A flash of rejection takes over his features and by the look in his eyes, you can tell that he is beginning to get lost in his anxious thoughts – thoughts that you quickly shut down by making the move that he just made. You cup his cheeks and you pull him down, closing your eyes as you slam your lips against his for the very first time. 
Unlike you, he wastes no second to reciprocate the kiss, a sigh of content leaving him as he presses you back against the wall. 
Warmth blooms in your stomach, one that doesn’t stay the same temperature for long because the moment he deepens the kiss, the moment his hands hold you tighter and his knee parts your legs, sliding his thigh in between yours as the kiss gets rougher and rougher, you feel the warmth evolving into a deeper, burning sensation – a fire inside of you that only he can mend. 
You can’t believe that this is happening, that something that you had been craving for years is now here. 
And Steve, he feels his heart pounding in his chest from the rush, from the adrenaline, from his desperation that grows bigger and stronger when he feels just how much you want him as your lips move roughly with his. 
You're hesitant with your touch, but when he grabs your face and pulls you even tighter against his body, his thigh pressing stronger against your core, you can’t help but throw your arms around his neck, digging your fingers into the hair that you’ve always wanted to touch. 
You can feel him smirking against your lips when you moan into the kiss, which prompts you to tug at his hair and press your tongue against his bottom lip.
He welcomes it into his mouth so eagerly, his tongue now clashing against yours as his palms slide down to your waist while your hands reach for the front of his shirt, fisting the material tightly as you begin to drag him into your room. 
You both know, you both feel where this is going, what this is leading to – what the past few weeks have been leading to. 
You want this, you need this, you need him, even if just for tonight. 
And you know, you already know that you will be done for, that he will ruin you for anyone else but you couldn’t care less, right now. Especially when he kisses you with so much roughness, everything about this setting all your insides on fire, leaving your skin burning and yet aching for more. 
Steve is careful not to step on your bare feet as you lead him backwards into a different room. Excitement bubbles in his stomach and he grows even more breathless than before, he pulls away and breaks the kiss but doesn’t hesitate to latch his lips onto your neck, kissing and biting your flesh, “I fucking hate you, Blondie. I hate that I want you so much.” 
Your lashes flutter as you close your eyes, tilting your head to the side as you feel your stomach and your heart fluttering at his touch, at his lips on your skin but especially at his words. 
Your knees grow weak and a needy whimper falls from your puffy lips. 
All that echoes in your mind now is I want you. I want you. I want you. 
You don’t even care about the other things he said to you, you only care about the three little words you have only ever dreamt of before. 
You almost fall when you feel the back of your legs hitting your bed, but he keeps you upright, not pushing you down just yet. He keeps nibbling on your neck, kissing, biting, sucking as he breathes heavily against you, growing harder against your stomach. 
“Couldn’t even finish the fucking date, couldn’t do anything cause I kept thinking about you, Blondie,” he speaks into your neck, fingers now dangerously close to your bare skin behind the towel. 
Your heart nearly explodes at his words and you can’t help but sigh in relief, knowing that nothing happened between him and Heidi. And all because of you. 
“You drive me fucking crazy, I want to rip the towel right off–”
“Then do!” You whine, not caring about how eager and desperate you sound, “show me how much you hate me, Stevie.” 
He pulls away from your neck after placing another wet kiss to your skin, strands of your hair getting caught in his as he faces you again, with flushed cheeks and almost black eyes he looks at you and takes in the sight of you, the pout on your lips, the flustered look on your face, big eyes that you are begging him with. 
He doesn’t even bother to look around the room, just caring about the bed behind you. 
He rips the towel off your body, letting it fall to the ground, his hands find your bare waist that he grips tightly as he throws you on the bed, smirking at the gasp that leaves your lips again. 
Without hesitating to, he reaches for the hem of his shirt and rips it off. 
Just like back then on the boat, when he took his shirt off before he jumped into the water, you stare at his chest, almost drooling at the delicious sight in front of you. His broad shoulders, the scar around his neck that makes him look even hotter, the hairs on his chest, the muscles in his arms that have visibly gotten bigger since high school. You bite your lip as your eyes move down, almost whining when you see the bulge in his tight jeans. 
You wish you could run your finger down his chest and his stomach, tracing every little scar that the bats have left behind, but instead, you push yourself up, blushing at the fact that you are completely bare in front of him. You reach for his belt, fingers beginning to fumble with the metal when he stops you with a simple touch and a headshake. 
“None of that,” he murmurs as he leans over, his hands digging between your ass and the mattress as he suddenly pulls you to the edge of the bed, dropping to his knees before you, he throws your legs over his shoulder and looks up at you with hooded eyes, “I need to hear you first.” 
You nearly combust when you feel his breath on your pussy and his lips on your inner thighs. A whimper falling from your mouth as you try to close your legs out of instinct, blushing even harder than before. 
“You’re fucking soaked,” he smirks, holding your thighs open as he teasingly slips a finger through your folds, “all for me, huh?” 
You don’t answer but you don’t need to, the loud moan that you let out when he dives right into you with his tongue, gives him everything he needs to know. 
He moans in content as he grabs your ass roughly, eyes rolling back when he tastes you for the first time, he almost starts drooling over you, finding pleasure in this. 
He teasingly licks a stripe up from your entrance to your clit, circling the tip of his tongue around your already aching nub as he uses his fingers to part your lips. 
You scrunch up your face as his tongue pleases you in ways your fingers never could, sighs and whimpers start escaping you as he now presses his thumb against your clit and he starts eating you out, his moans vibrating against you. 
Your mouth falls open as your back arches in pleasure, fingers digging into the sheets beneath you as you fall apart completely. 
No words are spoken as you both just enjoy this moment of bliss, him getting lost in you, you getting lost in the pleasure he blesses you with. 
You focus on everything and also on nothing – his whimpers send shivers through you, his tongue that he fucks you with making you gasp and drool, and despite the heaviness in your eyes, you manage to open them, wanting, needing to see him. 
He eats you out slowly, yet desperately, fingers and tongue now working together to unravel you. His eyes are closed and he keeps moaning and whimpering as saliva runs down his chin. He looks so content, so pleased from only this. 
Steve curls his fingers inside of you as he keeps his thumb on your clit, rubbing circles on it. 
Tears of pleasure prickle in your eyes as needy sounds keep escaping you. You hold the sheets even tighter now, closing your legs around his head, caging him in between them. 
Steve finally opens his eyes, they darken even more now when he sees how you are falling apart for him, it only prompts him to fuck you even harder with his tongue and his two fingers. 
Your moans and whimpers are enough to drive him crazy, enough to make the erection in his pants feel painful but he wants more, he needs to hear his name falling from your lips and he gets what he wants only seconds later when your body grows tense and your back arches again as a tear rolls down your cheek. 
“Steve!” You nearly scream as you come undone, writhing beneath his touch. 
You tilt your head to the side, bringing your hand up to your face, you bite your teeth into your knuckles as hot tears run down your flushed cheeks. 
Steve laps at your pussy, moans still falling from his mouth. Only as you whimper weakly does he pull away from you, but not without giving your clit another teasing lick, causing you to spasm which only makes him chuckle darkly. 
He carefully removes your legs from his shoulders and lets go of you before he rises back to his full height. 
You instantly press your legs together, breathing heavily as you try to calm down from the orgasm he just gave you. 
What Steve didn’t do before was take in the sight of your bare body, and now as he does it, he has to swallow harshly, his dick twitching in his jeans, begging for release. He finds himself aching for you, even more than before, he not only wants you, he needs you in ways he can’t even describe. 
He watches the way your chest glistens with sweat, your nipples hard from the pleasure that curses through your body, your eyes are shut, your brows pulled together. He licks his lips before he bites down as his eyes trace every inch of your skin, the scars that make you look even more attractive. 
It takes everything in him not to drop to his knees and taste you once again. 
He needs you, he needs to feel you wrapped around his dick, he needs to hear your moans as he fills you to the brim, he needs to fuck you. 
Steve unbuckles his belt, the metal clinking against each other, causing you to open your eyes at the sound. 
You look at him through your glassy eyes, pushing yourself up on your elbows as you watch him unbutton his pants but before he pushes them down, he reaches for his wallet in his back pocket and you watch him curiously. 
He opens it to take out the condom he had prepared for a different… less exciting occasion. He hastily pushes his pants and boxers down, his dick slaps against his stomach and he fails to notice the way your eyes widen or the way your lips part in surprise at the sight, at the size of him. He steps out of his shoes, cursing under his breath as he pushes them aside before he uses both hands to part your legs, getting on the mattress.
Before he rips the foil apart, he looks into your eyes, wanting your consent first but no words have to leave his mouth because you are the first to make the move, you sit up slightly, taking the tiny foil pack from his fingers, surprising him by bringing it up to your lips and ripping it open with your teeth. 
Despite the streaks of tears on your skin, the fucked out look in your eyes, the shakiness in your body, you look at him so dangerously. 
And he can’t do anything but watch you in awe for a moment, how you wrap your much smaller hand around his dick, pressing your thumb against his slit to tease him. 
“O-Oh fuck…” He shudders, eyes nearly closing at only that. 
You bite your bottom lip, trying not to drool as you roll the condom over his length. You look up at him again to find him staring at you with flushed cheeks and lust in his eyes. It’s dark in the room, but you can see each other just well enough, the moon shines brightly into your room tonight. 
You can’t even help yourself when you cup his cheeks and pull him down for a kiss, closing your eyes when your lips meet again. 
He grabs your waist, making you crawl back until you’re far enough on the mattress for your head to hit the pillows when he pushes you down. He presses his hands on your knees and you part your legs eagerly for him. 
His fingers trace your skin as he brings his hand up, passing your hip bone and your waist and grabbing your boob with roughness as he slips his tongue into your mouth, wanting you to taste yourself. He pinches your nipple with his fingers, smirking against you when you whine and writhe underneath him. 
You reach your hand down, not wanting to waste any more seconds, you wrap your hand around his dick again, jerking him off a few times before you line him up with your entrance, whining desperately again. 
Steve breaks the kiss and opens his eyes to look at you, “you’re so desperate for my cock, huh?” He breathes, still playing with your nipple. 
You raise yourself up a little, pecking his lips again as you nod your head. 
He can’t believe that you are this needy for him, that you are giving him those eyes. 
If only he knew how many times you have dreamt of this moment. 
“Please,” you whimper. 
“Please what, Blondie?” He teases you as his hand now slides down your stomach, fingertips brushing your clit, making you shiver. 
You blink and you breathe heavily as you place your hand on his shoulder, “please fuck me, Steve… Please…”
A satisfied smirk appears on his face, your desperation making him feel smug – but the smugness quickly dissolves into something else when he pushes inside you and feels your tightness around him for the very first time. 
You breathe in harshly and hold it, shutting your eyes when you feel him stretching you out. Nothing could have prepared you for this moment, not his tongue, not his fingers, nothing. The stretch is both painful and delicious, it makes you gasp but it also makes you drool as he inches deeper and deeper. 
Steve can only curse and whimper in pleasure as he watches his cock disappearing inside of you, he doesn’t push in fully though, too scared to hurt you. 
He bites his bottom lip, bottoming out again before he pushes back in, listening to the wet sound and the neediness in your voice as you moan. 
“M-More,” you whine, your eyes now watching him, “please…”
His dick twitches at the sound of that and at the look on your face. 
“Fuck me, Steve.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice, he pushes in deeper than before, until he’s buried inside of you completely. Usually, he would take a moment to catch his breathe, to adjust to the tightness but he is too eager, too desperate for this. So he grabs your hips and he starts thrusting, slowly at first, not wanting to hurt you. 
You gasp, hands finding the sheets beneath you again as your eyes follow the movement of his hips, watching the way his dick slides in and out of you. You throw your head back and look at his face next.
Strands of his hair fall in front of his eyes, his lips are puffy from all the kissing, his cheeks are flushed. He is moaning, for you, because of you. You are in utter bliss, feeling pride swell in your chest when he moans even louder as you clench around him. 
He watches the way he fucks you, eyes growing darker and darker and then, he looks at your chest, the way your tits bounce from the movements, something that prompts him to move his hips even faster, fucking into you harder now. 
“F-Fuck,” you whine loudly. 
His eyes meet your face and the pleasure on it is suddenly not enough for him, he wants to throw you over the edge, he needs to hear you scream for him. 
He curses under his breath when you clench around him again. 
Steve’s knees dig into the mattress, his fingers now holding you even stronger than before, he is sure to leave bruises but you don’t mind, you would never mind. He fastens his pace, railing into you and thrusting in and out of you, making you fall apart in the matter of a few seconds. You can’t speak, even if you tried. All that you can do is moan pathetically, letting him use you. 
“You take me so well, holy shit, Blondie,” he whimpers, voicing out his thoughts, brows scrunching together as he watches you, your lips parted, moans that he only ever dreamt of leaving you. “L-Look at you, fuck. If I knew that my cock would shut you up, I would’ve done this a long time ago.” 
“S-Steve!” You whine with a high pitched voice, something that only leads him to pound you even harder even if a tiny part of him wants to mock you. 
Your eyes roll back, the tension in your stomach rolling back in, only stronger and hotter this time, and you already don’t know what to do with yourself, but when he suddenly reaches for your legs, hooking the back of your knees around his forearms, your eyes widen when they meet his again and a wicked smirk appears on his face as he starts fucking you from a different angle, snapping his hips into yours so wildly that you can’t help but cry out as your eyelids become droopy, tears now begging to be released, just like the drool that starts coming from the corner of your mouth. 
The room now filled with nothing but the dirty sounds of your skin slapping together, the squelching noises from your pussy and his pleasing moans. 
Steve watches you in awe, eyes growing wide when he sees just how cockdrunk you are for him. 
He fucks you recklessly, eagerly and as though it is the last thing he will ever do. 
Your tears fall freely, your whimpers turning into cries the moment his thumb finds your clit again. 
He feels your walls clenching around him, gripping his twitching cock tightly – and he knows you’re close, he knows that he is close but he doesn’t want to stop, he doesn’t want this moment to be over. 
Steve savors every second, pounding into you roughly and harshly, grabbing your face with his left hand when your head falls to the side, he needs to watch you, he needs to see you when you cum around him. 
“You wanna cum for me?” He asks breathlessly. 
You nod eagerly, without letting a word fall from your lips, you only nod and whine. 
You feel the overstimulation rushing through you, the fire in your stomach that is about to burst into something bigger. You can feel him everywhere, he is so deep inside of you that it makes your body shake like crazy, but it feels good, so good that it almost wants to make you cry for different reasons when you think about how this could be a one time thing. 
His hand leaves your face, he throws his palm into the pillow next to you, holding it tightly as his own eyes fall shut now, moaning your name as he picks up the pace of his fingers against your clit, his hips snapping faster into yours now. 
“I-I’m–”
“I know, I know…” He coos, letting his face fall into the crook of your neck. 
You feel the urge to feel him even closer, so despite the weakness in your body, you use every bit of your strength to lift your hand and press it against his warm back. 
“Cum for me,” he whimpers into your neck before he bites into your flesh, marking you up for anyone to see. 
A loud gasp tears out of you as his last thrusts grow rougher and his fingers move faster, you can’t help but dig your nails into his back, scratching him as stars blur your vision and the shockwaves grip your body so tightly as you cum around his cock, just as he spills into the condom, moaning into your neck. 
You can’t even feel your tears nor the drool still coming out of your mouth, all that you can feel is him. Your arm now falls back onto the mattress and your eyes shutting as the darkness starts to envelope you. 
“F-Fuck,” he whispers as he stops moving, pressing another kiss to your neck before he pulls out of you, hissing at the feeling. 
He can feel your trembling body beneath his, the sighs that keep falling from your lips, he smugly pulls away to take a look at you, only to see your eyes dropping as you start to lose your consciousness. 
“Shit,” he whispers, cupping your cheeks, “you okay, Blondie?” 
You nod as best as you can, slapping his hand away as you snuggle into the pillows, not even bothering with the blanket. 
He scratches the back of his neck, pressing his lips together as he watches you fall asleep so quickly. He can’t help but feel smug as he looks at the way your thighs are trembling still. 
He stands up, leaving the room to walk into the bathroom, where the light is still turned on. He steps inside, noticing how the mirror is a little fogged, the smell of vanilla and strawberries lingering in the air, making his stomach flutter ever so slightly. 
Discarded clothes lay on the ground, he picks them up and puts them on the counter before he rolls off the condom, tying it up before he throws it into the trash. He turns towards the sink and washes his hands before he walks back into your room, a smile tugging on his lips. 
He plops down beside you, pulling the cover over you and himself, scooting closer to you. 
He doesn’t know where this will go or what is going to happen tomorrow but as he looks at your stained face, and every single previous second replays in his head, he is sure of one thing. 
There is not a single fucking chance that this is going to be a one time thing. 
tagging friends and mutuals!
@prettyboyeddiemunson @taintedcigs @mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @maroon-cardigan @munson-mjstan @sherrylyn628 @munsonlore @ibellcipem @joekeerysmoles
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neonghostlights · 7 months
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★ A/N: We've got another flashback! This is nearly a year after The Prom Incident.
★ Series Summary: It’s the ‘90s in LA and you and your best friend Eddie have both made it big. The following is a series of Interviews, News Reports and One Shots showing you and Eddie’s story throughout the years.
★ Chapter Summary: Chrissy Cunningham deserves better.
★ Warnings: Jealousy, Smoking, Cussing, Injury (Eddie is hurt), Fighting/Assault, Blood, Guns (a shotgun is shot), Drugs. 18+ only, Minors DNI
★Wordcount: 2.8k
Series Masterlist
Chapter Eight: That Night Back In '86
March 21st, 1986
You were so ready to be off work. 
Your feet hurt, your back hurt, hell even your eyelashes hurt. 
Working at the gas station after you graduated highschool was  never the plan. It also wasn’t the plan for Eddie to fail senior year. 
Again. 
You considered this your break year. Your grandma wasn’t pushing you into going to school right away, perfectly happy with keeping you in the trailer with her. You were so thankful that she wasn’t trying to get rid of you like some parents did as soon as their kid had a diploma in hand. 
The next shift employees came stumbling in, nearly half an hour late. You didn’t have it in you to argue with them about showing up to their shift on time. 
If you did that it meant you would have to waste energy to stay here even longer. 
Your car thankfully rumbled to life when you turned the key. It was a piece of junk, something that Eddie had helped you fix up when you bought it from a sketchy guy you met at the hideout. You needed something of your own so you didn’t have to rely on your grandma, Wayne or Eddie to drive you around anymore. 
It felt good to have some independence. If you wanted to just go out and get a late night snack alone you could. Not that that ever happened because it was like Eddie had sixth sense for the moment you started your car. As soon as you turned the key he would be running out his trailer door and diving into your passenger seat. 
You wondered if maybe he’d want to go get something tonight. You knew he had Hellfire but it should have already ended so he’d be home around the same time as you. 
The car bounced with a squeak as you hit the gravel drive of the trailer park. You looked at the trailer across from yours and the spot was empty. He wasn’t home yet but he would be soon. 
You parked beside your grandma's car, knowing that she was probably up watching some late night talk shows in the living room. 
You decided to wait for him. You leaned against your car, knowing for sure that some of the dust was rubbing onto the back of your black jeans. You didn’t have enough energy in you to care about the dirt or butt print being left on your car. That was what soap and water were for.  
You lit a cigarette and took a puff. Smoking was a habit you had picked up since working at the gas station. Eddie hated it. Apparently only one of you was allowed to destroy your lungs with something other than weed. 
The way he pouted everytime you lit one up was enough to quit smoking after three months. You were gonna surprise him, hand over your lighter tonight with a promise to your best friend to never touch a cigarette again in your life. 
You heard loud music before you saw him. You smiled to yourself softly. The neighbors hated the way Eddie drove and how loud his music was. They had complained time and time again to not only Wayne and Eddie but also you. Like you had some sort of control over what he did. 
You couldn’t blame them for being pissed. It was late and it felt like the gravel was vibrating beneath your feet from how loud that guitar solo squealing in the air was. 
The yellow headlights flashed as he turned into the drive, gravel flying and a cloud of smoke following the van. 
You pushed yourself up from the side of your car, patting your pockets to make sure you still had your money and lighter. 
The van jolted to a stop and you watched as Eddie’s door swung open and he hopped out with his arms swinging around dramatically. Typical. 
You started walking across to him, twirling the lighter in your hand. You opened your mouth, ready to ask if he wanted a late night Benny’s run or maybe to that 24 hour fast food place right outside of town. 
What you weren’t expecting was to see the passenger door open also and Chrissy Cunningham step out. She was in her cheer uniform, a bouncy ponytail in her strawberry blonde hair. She was gorgeous, even under the flickering, yellow lighting of the lamp that hung above her head.  
You knew what Eddie had thought about her even though he had never said it explicitly. Plenty of late night talks turned into him mentioning the one time she was nice to him in middle school. You always wanted to shake him, tell him all the times that you had complimented him. But your compliments had never stuck as much as hers did. 
You were able to read between the lines when it came to Eddie. You had the sense to know what he was feeling about her even if he never said it. 
You froze, gravel rolling underneath your sneakers as you watched her get out and look around nervously. 
Eddie heard your feet slide against the gravel and he turned to look at you. His eyes grew wide as he saw the look on your face. 
You didn’t know how to describe the feelings you were feeling. It felt like someone had taken your heart out of your body and beat it with a baseball bat with nails sticking out of it. It felt like cold water had been poured down your spine and it made your body react, shivering as you wrapped your arms around yourself to hold yourself together. It felt like you were going to shatter, fall apart and get mixed in with the gravel. They would never find all of the pieces of you to be able to fully put you back together after this. 
You thought back to prom and the promise you had made to yourself. 
You swallowed, standing up straighter and giving a small wave to Eddie and Chrissy as she approached him. 
You heard Eddie say something to her softly as you turned on your heels, walking quickly back to your trailer. 
“Hey!” Eddie called as he jogged to catch up with you. “You okay?” 
He reached out and touched your arm. You could feel the searing of his touch through your light jacket and all the way to your heated skin. 
You didn’t know why you were reacting this way. You just wanted to get in the shower and wash it away, pretend that they weren’t over in the trailer across from you alone. Maybe you should get in your car and drive around town until the sun breaks the sky. How many hours would that be? Six? Seven? You could do that. 
You jerked your arm away, meaner than you intended. Eddie looked hurt, wide eyed as he stared at you. 
You were embarrassed by the way you were acting and it was even more reason to get away. You fumbled with the door handle. 
“She’s just buying from me,” Eddie explained. 
He didn’t need to explain because he had no reason to. You had no reason to react this way. It was you. You were the problem here, not Eddie. 
You looked up at him taking in the worried expression on his face, the furrow of his brows, the indent formed just above his nose, and the grim set of his mouth. You wanted to reach out and smooth his face, ease his pain even though it was you that was hurting. 
“Okay. That’s nice. I’m gonna go and get some food or something,” you said, proud of yourself with how unbothered you sounded. Eddie’s frown just deepened. 
“Why don’t you wait? It won't be long and we can drop her back off and go get something when I’m done,” he said, an arm sneaking up and wrapping around your shoulder. You melted a little then, pressing into him. You were close to each other, closer than usual. The last time your faces were this close together was when you were dancing at prom. You pushed down that memory. 
You weren’t sure what to do with his nearness so you started to try to unravel a piece of his hair that was stuck to one of the pins on his vest. 
Eddie smiled at that, relaxing a little at the mundaneness of the task. 
Eddie went to speak again when Chrissy called his name with a trembling voice from across the lot. 
He cursed under his breath and shot you an apologetic look. “I’m gonna go make some money and then I’m all yours for the rest of the night. Okay?” 
You nodded as he stepped back and with one last look crossed back over to where Chrissy waited for him. You watched as he held the door open to the trailer, saying a joke to make her giggle as she crossed into the threshold. 
You found your grandma scrambling away from the living room window when you made it inside. Scrambling might have been too generous of a word. She had been moving a little slower lately, blaming it on the arthritis in her knees. She had been refusing to go to the doctor, stubborn as ever. 
 She had a pair of binoculars in her hand, pretending to be inspecting a spot on the carpet. 
“Were you spying?” You sputtered. 
“Hm? Me? No.” She didn’t even try to come up with an excuse, knowing that she had been caught. 
You rolled your eyes with a little laugh. Your grandma always had to know the trailer park business and not even you and Eddie were immune to that. 
“I’m gonna be in my room. Eddie’s coming over in a second so we can go get food,” you called as you walked back into your room. You fell onto the bed, willing yourself not to fall asleep. 
Your bedroom window faced the front of Eddie’s trailer and you reasoned with yourself not to peek out the window like your grandma and wait for him to come out. You sighed and rolled over on your side instead, facing the wall. 
You felt your eyes start to grow heavy and shut. You weren’t sure how long you were out for when you heard the screaming. 
You jumped out of bed, stumbling and dizzy from suddenly waking up. You shoved the blinds to the side, bending one of the pieces to see Eddie being dragged out of his trailer by some guys in varsity jackets. 
You didn’t realize you were rushing out the door until you heard your grandma screaming behind you to stay inside. 
You weren’t quick enough to shield Eddie from the first blow. Or any of the hits after that. 
Chrissy cried and screamed at Jason to stop but he wasn’t listening. You knew it wasn’t a fair fight. There were too many of them against Eddie. Each time he tried to get up they would just push him back down. 
Jason was wild with a crazed look in his eye as he attacked Eddie brutally. Two of his friends held Eddie down by his arms while Jason hit and kicked with no care in the world. Other members of the basketball team circled and cheered while you watched your best friend, the one person in the world you would give your life for, bleed into the dirt. 
You dove into the mess of things, ignoring Chrissy’s pleas for you to stay out of it. One of them grabbed you, laughing as he dragged you back away from Eddie. You made eye contact with Eddie from where he laid on the ground and fire flew in his eyes when he realized one of them was touching you. 
The fighting felt like it had gone on for hours instead of only a couple of minutes. It was like time had slowed dramatically to a crawl, making everything more painful. 
His assailants mocked and laughed at him. Eddie ignored them, his eyes were focused only on the one basketball player holding you as threats flew out of Eddie’s mouth at him. 
He thrashed and bucked, doing his best to break free from his restraint. They held onto him tighter when the sound of a loud bang in the air had everyone freezing. 
Everyone turned to the sound and you were horrified to see your grandma in her nightgown and slippers at the foot of your trailer steps with her shotgun in her hands. 
“Get the hell out of here!” She yelled, positioning the shotgun again. 
You and Eddie were frozen while the rest of the group scrambled to the cars that were parked haphazardly around Eddie’s trailer. Jason grabbed Chrissy by the wrist, dragging her with him. You wanted to stop him, to pull her away from him but you knew it would start another fight that Eddie would be the victim of. You’d have to find a way to check in on her tomorrow. 
Engines revved as they flew out of the trailer park, bits of gravel flying. A rock kicked off one of the tires and hit the side of Eddie’s vans with a crack. 
You didn’t wait for their tail lights to disappear before you were crouched down beside him, checking to see how badly he was hurt. 
His nose and mouth were bloody and there was a split on his lip. His skin around his right eye was already turning purple. It would blossom into a nasty bruise tomorrow. 
He groaned as he sat up, clutching his side. 
“You okay?” Your grandma yelled, still standing where you last saw her with the gun tight in her grip. 
Eddie gave a single thumbs up as he pushed himself off the ground, wobbling slightly. 
You went to wrap an arm around him to support him but he shook his head as he limped across the drive to your trailer instead of his own. 
You followed him silently, making sure both locks on the front door were secure. Your grandma disappeared into her room, giving you both some privacy. 
You found him with his backside leaned up against the bathroom sink, waiting for you with his arm crossed against his chest. You grabbed the first aid kit from the shelf above the toilet and set it on the lid, rummaging through it to find what you needed. 
You stood in front of him, chest pressed against chest with how little room you had. Eddie winced as you started wiping at his skin with the cleaner.  
“Don’t you ever do that again,” he said through gritted teeth and you couldn’t tell if the bite in his voice was from the pain or his anger. 
“Do what?” you asked, avoiding eye contact as you wiped at his skin some more. 
His hand shot out, grabbing your wrist to stop your movements. You looked up at him finally as he stared down darkly at you. His knuckles were cracked and changing colors from the few hits he was able to get in.
“Don’t you ever jump into a fight like that ever again.” 
“But they were hurting you,” you explained. He should know. He should know that you wouldn’t be able to watch him get hurt without jumping in to try to save him. It was like that time those kids were being mean to him at the park when you were younger. 
You jumped in then and you would jump in now. 
“I don’t care if they’re fucking killing me. You don’t do that ever again. If something happened to you…” Eddie trailed off, eyes focusing on the wall behind you with a far out look. 
“Okay,” you whispered to make him happy. It was a lie. You’d dive into trouble for him a million times over if it meant keeping him safe. Even if it killed you in the process of saving him. 
He released your wrist with a nod, and you went back to tending his wounds. 
You were angry. Not only that this had happened to him but that there would be no justice. No cop in this town would listen to Eddie. And if either of you tried it would just bring unwanted attention to the way he made his money.
Wayne was going to be so pissed when he got home in the morning and heard what happened.
“I don’t think they’re that bad,” you said about his wounds when the silence grew too heavy and the ringing in your ears too loud. 
Eddie wasn’t listening though, the wheels were still turning in his head. You wondered what he was thinking about but you were too afraid to ask him. 
“I’m gonna fucking show them,” Eddie finally said, his voice dark and determined. 
“Show who what?” 
“Everyone. This whole damn town. I’m gonna get out of here and prove them all wrong,” he declared, finally looking at you with wide eyes. 
You wanted to tell him that he never had to prove anything to you. That you knew who he was and what he was capable of. That you were his biggest fan and you would cheer for him no matter what he did. 
You wanted to say that, but you couldn’t. So, you just nodded your head instead and finished cleaning him up.
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number 2!!
So the reader is ftm, and Eddie is obsessed with his voice (he's a singer) his voice is like a destroy boys / destructo disk type.
And Eddie is head over heals when he sings. and even more when he gets m/n to moan.
and if you're comfortable, can you do a kinda heavy make out?
Thanks! (Drink water or I will make you :) )
Hi! Thanks for your patience while I worked on this! Hope you enjoy!
Eddie Munson x Trans Male Reader
CW: Smut adjacent, nothing explicit.
Send me request here! Currently writing for Eddie Munson. I write for a variety of reader inserts (male, female, gender neutral, POC too).
The more details you had to your request, the better it is for me. EX: “What about some fluff for Eddie after he’s had a long day?”
Feel free to look through my masterlist here!
_______________________________________________________________
It’s not that Eddie’s angry if what he’s heard is true. In fact, he’d be fucking glad that there is another band in town. But it is nerve wracking. Will these newcomers somehow get faster traction than Corroded Coffin? Will they have to struggle just like they did? Part of Eddie hopes this band is not struggling as much as they did, but something like jealousy that Eddie wishes he doesn’t feel is the hardest part to get rid of. 
So on Wednesday, during the evening when Eddie normally would be trying to bury the woes, he travels to The Hideout. The trip is truly speared by the necessity of making sure the band gets paid. After the Tuesday gig, the manager asked if Eddie could come tomorrow to get the cash considering they’d done a bank drop earlier than they normally did but had to after a pretty hefty weekend of festivities. Eddie’s not sure what could’ve caused in a town like Hawkins but he wasn’t going to argue with the one revenue stream that was legal. 
Thus landing Eddie here, leaning into the corner of the bar, watching the band play. It’s not metal--decidedly not, but Eddie still finds his head bobbing along to the hefty and heavy hats of the drums as the singer screams into the microphone, “Is this all I’ve ever known?” 
It’s punk, a music genre Eddie knew of and listened to occasionally even if it wasn’t what he gravitated too. He’d hoped for this band's sake that soon the genre would have its moment. It felt timely, a reflection of the shit state of the world and demanding change. Where Eddie’s genre of choice was all about escaping and finding some fantastical way out of the misery, this bank charged the misery head on. 
“Now I’m crying in a bathroom stall,” the singer croons, a layered haircut bouncing along the side of their face. The ends are flipped out, framing the round face in a way that reads like a warning but also lures Eddie in. All he wants to do is to know the way the rosy cheeks feel under his palm. The voice is definitely singing, but it’s almost mocking as they speak sing some of the lyrics. Eddie’s spine shivers. 
Instantaneous as the thought of the sweaty cheeks comes Eddie shakes his head, trying to keep in mind that he is here to get paid from yesterday. But the lead singer’s voice invades Eddie’s brain. He has a feeling as the manager hands over bills and Eddie stuffs it into his pocket, that he’s going to be hanging around The Hideout a lot more often in the middle of the week. 
After three weeks straight of attending the Wednesday shows, the lead singer seems to approach Eddie head on, though Eddie’s been one to always linger at the bar. “You play on Tuesdays right?” 
Eddie nods. “Yeah. You all sound amazing by the way. Like really good.” It should come out with a bit more shame and a bit more reservation. But the praise is all to easy to give because each time Eddie hears the band, the more he falls in love with them. 
“Th-thanks. You and your band sound great too.”
“Would-would you like to go out sometime?” Eddie asks. “I’d like to get you know you more.” He’s being way more suave about this than he’d ever imagine himself to be. But maybe it’s the setting. It’s not school and he’s not dealing with someone that might even have some pre-conceived notion about him, or be trying to get a story to tell a friend about how they kissed, slept with, or even hung out with The Freak. It’s a bar--two social outcasts who are doing everything they can to let the world know the wrongs it’s committed. It’s just easier because here, there’s no real judgment. 
“I’d like that. What did you have in mind?”
It’s a simple question. And the response is less simple, less smooth, because if Eddie’s is honest he anticipated not getting this far. But even though he fumbles through his response, it lands him here, listening through the closed bathroom door as you hum from the otherside. You’d been working on some lyrics for a new song for a week now, singing the chorus of it ever and over throughout the trailer. Washing dishes--you were singing. Taking a quick smoke break--singing. 
The sink runs for almost a minute before the door handle creaks with the twist and it opens to reveal a goofy smile on Eddie’s face. “Were you listening to me piss?” you ask. 
“Listening to you sing, more specifically. The pee was just a byproduct.”
“Weirdo,” you laugh and step around him to head to his room. 
“It’s not my fault that you have a voice that calls out to me like a siren. Really it’s your fault.” 
He follows behind you to his room. You settle at his desk and Eddie falls onto the bed behind you. Where you’d normally have a response, your focus zeros in on the notebook in front of you. Eddie watches the way the line of your shoulders tense up. He pushes up, hands taking the meat of your shoulders into his palms. He wastes no time in kneading at them. 
“You’re thinking too hard about it.” Eddie trails his lips closer to your ear. They brush a kiss to shell and then down your neck.  “Let me help you relax.”
You sigh into the feeling of Eddie’s hands and lips at your neck and shoulders. The song did need to be done by the weekend for rehearsals. But you’d managed to get more done than you thought you would consider the difficulty that it was giving you earlier. Maybe it wouldn’t at all be a bad idea. “You’re lucky I like you,” you tease. 
Eddie’s hands slide down from your shoulders to your back, pressing right above your hips firmly. The action makes you groan--mostly involuntarily, as you hadn’t even noticed how much tension you’d been putting on your lower back. His fingers knead at your body and every moan that you let slip through your lips makes Eddie purr into your skin. 
If it weren’t for the back of the chair, you’re sure Eddie’s crotch would be pressed into your spine and you’d inevitably feel the growing erection. You only let it go for another minute or two before you reach back for his hands. He pauses at the light hold of your wrist. “Something wrong?”
You shake your head before pushing up from the chair. “No, just want you closer,” you whisper as you press into his chest. 
Eddie dips his head, capturing your lips in a kiss. His hold is gentle around your waist, fingers hardly pressing into the hot flesh under the sweatshirt. Your head grows a little dizzy with the feeling of his tender trace. The parting of your lips echoes in the room before you two meet again for another kiss. A grunt falls from Eddie as you push him down onto the bed and you land squarely on his lap, not hiding the sigh at the feeling of his erection pressing up into you. 
Though you two hadn’t gone as far to have sex just yet, only being a few months total into the relationship, it still pleased you to know you had this kind of effect on Eddie. He laughs as you rock your hips against his. “Don’t,” he hums. “I know you’re sick and demented and you get pleasure from making me puddy.”
You grin. “Which is why I do it.”
Eddie squeezes at your sides, his hands never go higher than your stomach and you’re thankful that he seems to be aware of how at times your chest causes you discomfort, but right now, you don’t mind his searing touch, so you guide Eddie’s hands up and when his fingers brush over your chest and nipples, your throat loses the battle of suppressing the moan. 
Eddie drops his head a little, listening to the sound of your pleasure rolling around his brain. “God I love that sound,” he whispers into your throat. His lips kiss square in the middle, tongue falling the pressing of his kiss. “I love it so fucking much.”
You release another one, fingers gripping at Eddie’s shoulders to keep you steady. “Please.”
It’s a plea, Eddie knows that. For what? Not even you can tell, but Eddie drops his hands to your thighs getting a tight grip and then tosses you into the pillows. His crawl up your body is slow and tortuous but when his hands finally settle against, holding your waist and his lips seal around yours, you hum at the weight of him pressing you into the mattress. 
“Thank you,” you exhale as Eddie moves his kisses down your jaw.
“Any time, baby,” he whispers back. His teeth trace the bone of your chin before he trails his tongue back down over your throat. Your moan comes out shaky. “Any fucking time.”
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navnae · 1 year
Text
Burning Underneath Your Fingertips (18+)
Pairings: Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Bottom Steve Harrington, Top Eddie Munson, Dom/sub, Sub Steve Harrington, Dom Eddie Munson, Rough S3x, Rough Kissing, Roughness, Sadism, Blood Kink, Painful S3x, Pain, Masochism, Anal S3x, Anal Fingering, First Time Bottoming, First Kiss, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Secret Crush, Mention of blood, Jealousy
Summary: “Do it again.”
Eddie couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Steve looked serious about it too which caught him off guard.
“What?”
“Do it again. This time I want you to make it hurt and don’t hold back.”
Eddie’s eyes went dark and he could see Steve swallow thickly as he stared deeply into his eyes. Eddie wrapped his hands around Steve’s wrist roughly before pinning them back into their original position. He leaned down close enough to Steve’s ear and his breathing hitched from the feeling of Eddie’s hot breath.
“I’m going to fucking destroy you.”
-
Eddie discovers that he liked seeing Steve in pain and he thinks it’s a weird thing that will pass, until he discovers that Steve likes being in pain.
Things escalate.
-
It didn’t go without notice that Eddie was kind of weird and that would be an understatement if he he had to say so himself. Despite the genre of music that he liked that was probably the most ‘normal’ thing about him. That’s why when the gang welcomed Eddie with open arms he was a little hesitant at first because even though he experienced the same things they did there was still a level of oddness that was all over him. Eddie thought that things would change after the whole Vecna situation but it never did, in fact it made Eddie think of crazier thoughts than before. His imagination got the best of him as he walked with the older group through the upside down and Steve was in a lot of pain from the bats that attacked him. At first Eddie didn’t get a chance to think about it any further since running for his life was all he could do at the moment but once they found a place where they could take a minute to regain themselves something sparked inside of him that he hasn’t felt in a long time. When he watched Nancy take care of Steve’s wounds and the noises that came from him as he winced from her touch completely sent Eddie over the edge. Eddie couldn’t watch the scene that took place in front of him. The image of Steve in pain did a number in his head and Eddie wasn’t blind either, he thought Nancy was lucky that she got to witness him at a vulnerable moment up close while looking at her with soft eyes that said a thousand words.
Eddie thinks about that day very often whenever Steve is around and he hated to admit it but he would do anything to get that image again. Even though he knew there was never going to be a chance of him getting what he wanted the next best thing he settled for was casual late night visits from Steve. Like always Eddie greeted Steve with a wide smile before letting him into the trailer where they would sit on the couch and smoke a little. Rolled up joints and a lighter were placed on the table for both of them to indulge in for the next few hours. Steve picked up one of the joints then placed it in between his lips before taking the lighter and sparking up the end of it. Eddie didn’t realize that he watched Steve’s every movement attentively not wanting to miss any second. He leaned back on the couch and relaxed his body as he blew out smoke that was aimed towards the ceiling. Eddie stared at Steve’s Adam’s apple as it bobbed every time he swallowed and the way his hair fell messily over his forehand with beads of sweat becoming evident. There was a feeling in Eddie’s chest that tightened as he thought about what Steve did before he got there and he figured out what it was pretty quickly. Eddie’s nose started to burn with the scent of perfume that came off of Steve like it genuinely started to make him sick.
“Figures.” Eddie huffed. He leaned up to grab the left over joint and put it in his mouth. Steve looked at him with a confused expression.
“What?” Steve asked as he faced Eddie.
“Nothing. I just kind of hoped that you would have a little bit of decency before stopping by. You know, washing off your booty call.” Eddie said half joking then shrugging his shoulders. Steve let out an obnoxious groan as he rolled his eyes and he put the joint back in between his lips. Eddie noticed that Steve was taking it hard tonight with every hit that he kept taking back to back. He used to be so against smoking especially when it was done around him, now Eddie could say this was his one hundredth time seeing Steve lose himself and it made him weak every single time.
“Just admit, Munson. You’re jealous and you’re madly in love with me. I know it’s difficult trying not to shower me with kisses every awakening moment.” Steve teased. He laughed it off as soon as he said it and all Eddie could do was blush at the comment. Instead of responding Eddie silently went back to whatever was left of his joint while looking off to the side of the room. He tapped his foot anxiously as Steve’s words replayed in his head, Eddie hated that the feeling in his chest tightened at the thought of whoever was getting most of Steve’s time.
He actually was jealous.
“Oh my god!” Steve shouted with his eyes widening as he leaned up on the couch. Eddie jumped at Steve’s sudden outburst and he started panic.
“What’s wrong?” Eddie frantically scanned over Steve’s body to see what was wrong but he looked perfectly fine. Steve let out a laugh at Eddie’s reaction while the other boy was still confused.
“I was right, you have a crush on me. Don’t you?” Steve smirked. He put his chin in his hand and leaned in close to Eddie in a playful manner.
“What are you talking about? No I don’t.” Eddie lied. He lied badly. The burning sensation that came over his was becoming unbearable.
“For someone who always have something to say you got really quiet when I said you were jealous. You’re face is getting red, Munson.” Steve continued on. Eddie covered his face as he groaned into his hands.
“You’re full of shit, Harrington. Everything that’s coming out of your mouth makes zero sense.” Eddie mumbled with his hands still over his face. Steve was making him full on blush without even trying and Eddie knew Steve got a kick out of the few times he made him speechless.
“That is true but I still think deep down you like me. Your body language gave it away especially with weed in your system.” Steve said before taking one last drag from the joint that was between his fingers and he placed it in the ashtray.
“Steve,” Eddie’s tone was serious when he looked at Steve. He wanted this topic to die and he wanted to act like it never happened in the first place. “If you continue to talk about this I’m going to find a way to make you shut the fuck up.”
It sounded harsh when Eddie said it but that was just the way he talked and Steve understood the underlying humor that was there. Eddie thought that Steve’s silence was a mutual agreement to the conversation being over which he felt a little bit of relief about. He didn’t expect the complete opposite and in a split second Steve was close enough to feel his breath against his lips. Eddie blinked several times thinking that his eyes were deceiving him. Steve fixed his lips to form a mischievous smile as he leaned in dangerously close and he almost brushed up against Eddie’s lips.
“I’d like to see you try.” Steve whispered. Eddie saw his eyes glance at his lips quickly before returning his gaze. Steve’s body was also being honest in the way he reacted to things and a light shade of pink spread across he’s cheeks even though he was the one that initiated the challenge. Eddie has never been someone who backed down easily, plus the idea of putting Steve in his place was very intriguing.
“You’re on.” Eddie whispered back. Before Steve could do anything he was already on his back with his hands pinned down on each side of his head. Eddie got on top of him in the blink of an eye and he tightened his grip around Steve’s wrist as he tried get out of his grasp. The day that they were in the upside flashed in his mind when Steve looked like he was in pain underneath him. Eddie lost his train of thought from the low grunts and the squirming that came from Steve as he tried to get Eddie off of him. Eddie’s fingernails dig into the sensitive skin earning a whimper out of Steve. His mind went blank as his nails created deeper marks along Steve’s skin, blood rushing to the surface instantly.
“Ah… Eddie you’re hurting me.” Steve hissed. Eddie snapped out of his thoughts and he immediately felt embarrassed. He let go of Steve’s wrist before leaning up looking terrified. Eddie looked at the blood under his nails and he started to feel sick. His intentions wasn’t to hurt Steve that badly or at all.
“I-I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s gotten into me-“
“Do it again.”
Eddie couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Steve looked serious about it too which caught him off guard.
“What?”
“Do it again. This time I want you to make it hurt and don’t hold back.”
Eddie’s eyes went dark and he could see Steve swallow thickly as he stared deeply into his eyes. Eddie wrapped his hands around Steve’s wrist roughly before pinning them back into their original position. He leaned down close enough to Steve’s ear and his breathing hitched from the feeling of Eddie’s hot breath.
“I’m going to fucking destroy you.”
Eddie moved his body forward over Steve’s wrists and licked the bloody nail marks that he left. A small whine could be heard from Steve as he winced at the stinging feeling that came from Eddie’s saliva when it went into his fresh wounds. He would jerk his body upwards every time Eddie’s tongue swirled over the area. Eddie smirked against his skin enjoying every second of Steve being in pain while also getting pleasure from it. He took the skin in between his teeth drawing a little bit of blood and Eddie savored the taste on his tongue. Eddie pulled away as he licked his lips of what was left on his mouth. He met Steve’s eyes that were filled with tears and they ran down his flustered face staining his cheeks. Eddie felt his pants get tighter at the sight of Steve laying there helplessly, he sobbed quietly as he took in the pain that Eddie gave him.
“Shh baby, you’re doing good for me.” Eddie said softly. He rubbed his thumb under Steve’s eye as a tear fell down. Steve was already a wreck and Eddie did the bare minimum of what he really wanted to do. Eddie leaned up to adjust his body then he positioned himself in between Steve’s legs. His hands roamed over Steve’s body eagerly wanting to take things further. “Do you want me to continue?”
“Y-yes… please.” Steve breathed. Eddie’s cock twitched at the noises that Steve desperately tried to hide. He leaned down and gently started to kiss Steve’s puffy lips as he slid his hand down to his crotch earning a moan from him. Eddie bit Steve’s bottom lip giving him permission to slip his tongue inside of his mouth. Their kisses consisted of needy moans for each other and both of them moved their bodies in sync. Eddie started to kiss down Steve’s jaw then down to his neck. He slipped his hands under the shirt that was separating their bodies and in one swift motion he took off Steve’s shirt along with his own. Eddie placed gentle kisses over Steve’s chest before taking his nipple into his mouth. Steve cried at the feeling of Eddie biting the sensitive bud and roughly sucking on it. After a few seconds Eddie pulled away before continuing to kiss down Steve’s body then stopping above his jeans. Eddie cupped the evident bulge that Steve had formed in the past few minutes. He teased Steve by moving his hand slowly over his erection and a spew of faint pleading escapes his lips. “Eddie please, it hurts.”
“What do you want?” Eddie smirked as he squeezed Steve’s clothed erection. Steve couldn’t form any words and Eddie loved every second of it. The breathless moans that Steve had to let out or else he was going to faint from the pain. Eddie applied more pressure making Steve buck his hips upwards and the cry that came afterwards made everything worth it.
“I want you to fuck me. Please fuck me until your fully satisfied.” Steve begged. Eddie groaned at Steve’s request and he didn’t know the affect that he had on him. Eddie tried to keep his composure but he wanted to fill Steve up with all of him and he wanted to suffocate in those beautiful moans. He leaned up to unbutton Steve’s pants then unzipped them slowly. Eddie hooked his finger under the waistband and pulled the his pants down with his boxers. Steve’s cock sprung up against his stomach, the tip leaking with precum as he wrapped his hand around the base.
“You’re so fucking wet for me. I’m going to make you feel good baby boy.” Eddie said sweetly. He stroked Steve’s cock and the precum started to build up at the top of his slit. Eddie rubbed his fingers over the head to coat his fingers in the sticky substance. With two digits he pressed them up against Steve’s entrance earning a moan from him as he tried to push Eddie’s fingers into himself. Eddie picked up on the sudden change in behavior and he thought he’s have some fun with it. He inserted his fingers without warning Steve making his entire body jolt by the unexpected feeling of being stretched. Eddie thrusted his fingers towards a sensitive spot before curling them while Steve arched his back off of the couch and his moans became high pitched with every thrust from Eddie’s fingers. The tears started to form in Steve’s eyes again from the overwhelming sensation that was building up in his stomach and it all out of his control. Eddie thrusted just fingers one last time before he pulled them out letting Steve’s hole clench around nothing.
“Baby I didn’t know you were this sensitive, I’m going to make you feel good okay?” Eddie whispered as he wiped the tears from Steve’s eyes. He wanted to drown in those beautiful brown eyes that said a millions things but right now one thing was on his mind. Eddie leaned down and placed a soft kiss on his cheek then repositioned himself. He took care of his own pants, tossing them to the side along with his boxers. His cock rubbed against Steve’s cock and both of them moaned in unison at the friction. Eddie took himself into his hand to align his cock with Steve’s gaping entrance and he slowly started to push himself inside of Steve. His hole clenched tightly around Eddie making it impossible for him to move. “Fuck you’re tight. Relax a little bit.”
“I’m trying ah- shit…” Steve felt his entire body became weak once Eddie managed to get his cock deep inside of him. Eddie let out a low groan as he was consumed fully by Steve’s warmth and it felt like his body was closing in on him. Steve could feel Eddie thrust hard enough that it made his stomach tense up. He pulled Eddie down into a kiss letting themselves get lost in each other’s bodies. Eddie slowly started to pick up the pace and every inch of him disappeared deeply inside of Steve’s entrance. In between their kisses Steve moaned when Eddie’s cock slammed into him aggressively and it could be felt in his toes with every movement. Eddie melted into the kiss like it was a drug that he’s been dying to have. He craved being inside of Steve and taking him all the way, Eddie was rough with his actions but he still wanted to care for Steve’s body like no one else could. Eddie knew that he was getting close to coming and he wanted all of it to go inside of Steve until it spilled out onto the couch making it stained.
“Eddie I’m c-close.” Steve warned. His hole tightened around Eddie’s cock and every muscle in his body started to become sore.
“Me too baby. I want you to cum.” Eddie said through a grunt. He moved his hips faster and every thrust started to build up even more tension in his body. Both of them were on the edge of their orgasims the eventually with a harsh thrust forwards Eddie came inside of Steve’s entrance. Steve came hard onto his stomach with a whine and his body fell completely limp. Sweat poured down over their skin as they laid down in the couch trying to regain their consciousness. Weakly Eddie snuggled into the couch behind Steve and wrapped his arm around his waist the kissing his shoulder gently. “I guess I won.”
“Really? Looks like I’m still talking.” Steve challenged even though he was out of breath. Eddie leaned up and gave him a smirk.
“Is that so, wanna go for another round big boy.” Eddie said as he quickly got back on top of Steve. The boy underneath him looked terrified and Eddie enjoyed the sight. “You asked for it.”
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two-red-lungs · 2 years
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Ayooo. It sounds kinda cringe but eddie munson x vampire reader???? Or something like that. Or just x GN reader. That would be rlly swag of you :D
NO BC THIS IS PERFECT I was like "man I really wanna write a little about the Lost Boys/Stranger Things fic I'm working on, but IDK if the asker knows the Lost Boys" but you DO so sorry I am taking creative liberties w/ this imagine.
"Big Storm Coming" (Eddie Munson + LostBoys!Reader)
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Your brothers were rabble-rousers. Nare-do-wells. It made settling anywhere... difficult, when the police kept getting on their tails. They set fires, caused public chaos, spray-painted walls. Hell, you spray-painted walls when you were bored enough. Eternal life was excruciatingly boring.
Like clockwork Max would chew them out, probably throwing one of them across the room in anger, and then move all of you to a new town.
Probably for the best. David brought death with him everywhere, he was messy and angry like that, and Dwayne, Marko, and Paul followed his example. Usually leaving you and Star to clean up the disaster.
So, really, moving to Hawkins felt like any other clan migration. Low population, sleepy police force, lots of bored teens "prone to going missing", as David had put it with a tight, toothy smile.
Marko had cackled when Max said he was enrolling everyone in highschool to "keep you outta trouble". He thought it was a joke.
It was not a joke. When you tried to protest Max told you to shut it or he'd lock you out on the porch come sunrise.
You all went straight from Max's van doors to the school entryway. A half-second in the sun, shielded under jacket lapels and long hair.
It was, admittedly, pretty fun, blowing open those doors on your first day. As much as you had a love-hate relationship with your blood brothers, you had to admit they turned heads. You all did. Wild rocker hair, manic self-assured grins, spike-studded boots. Rock-and-roll, baby. The sea of hallway students parted for the five of you.
Paul and Dwayne, as usual, were flirting with any girl that came within five feet of them, taking bets on who'd get a number by the end of the day. But with Star home with Laddie and David glowering at everyone like he wanted to massacre everything and then hang himself, you were pretty much on your own.
Great. School, again. A year of faking interest in American history and just waiting for a drained corpse to be found in the woods.
And then. AND THEN. Hawkins High, shithole in the middle of Indiana, gave you the gift you'd be desperately hoping for.
"Principal's office, NOW, Munson!" A teacher screamed nearby, flinging open a classroom door and shoving out a tall, wild-maned, leather-jacket clad man. The man flipped a double bird to the closed door, shoved his hands in his pockets, and turned around to start trudging down the hall.
Freezing in place when he saw you. Two individuals, nearly identical in style. Outcasts. Lost, maybe.
An incredulous grin spread across his face, dark eyebrows disappearing up into messy fringe. "...Holy shit." He said with a disbelieving laugh. "Look at you. Rock on, man."
He introduced himself as Eddie Munson, blood thumping under his ivory-pale skin and smelling like American Spirit cigarettes, and all at once you were hooked. He was clearly excited to see someone else with a patch jacket sporting bands he knew. He asked you if you wanted to smoke sometime. You blindly agreed, distracted by that warm smile.
And as he walked away down the wide hall, saying "Boo!" to a passing group of freshmen girls and making them literally jump, two things were made utterly apparent to you.
One: Eddie Munson was going to save your high school experience from being the most boring thing ever.
Two: he needed to be protected from your brothers at all costs. None of you were allowed to be happy. To make friends. They destroyed those sort of things out of envy, of jealousy. And you would not let Eddie be a tally mark in David's kill ledger.
Thank you for the prompt: if you guys like this concept, please let me know! I'm considering a longer, multi-chapter crossover fic with Eddie/reader and the Hawkins gang VS Max's boys.
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buckysgrace · 7 months
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Five
The day was going slow for Billy. The minutes seemed like hours as they slowly dragged on and on. The more he thought about his actions from yesterday, the more he regretted acting so rashly. He knew Eddie would eventually say something, which meant that Addi would confront Kim about it. He exhaled as he finished writing down the orders that they needed for next week. 
“Hey, I’m here - fuck,” Billy’s eyes rose from the paper in front of him, a less than amused grin forming on his lips, “I don’t suppose there’s anyone else.” Steve replied dryly, looking less than happy to see Billy. Steve scratched his fingers across his nose and Billy hoped that he was remembering how badly it hurt when he’d been punched. He thought that he deserved to be punched again for looking at him in such a way with those big brown eyes. 
“It’s your lucky day Pretty Boy,” Billy replied just as dryly, “What do you need?” He asked more casually this time, remembering that Steve was a customer. He’d still like to beat in the other side of his face for lingering around Kim. Not to mention his creepy interest in Max and her friends. Steve looked less than enthused as he glanced around.
“I need my oil changed,” Steve mumbled as he pushed his hand through his long hair. Billy rolled his eyes, unable to help himself, “And new tires.” He glanced up towards Billy before he quickly looked away, like he was unable to hold his gaze. Billy sighed as he nodded his head, beginning to gain all of the information that he needed from Steve. He hoped that he could avoid working on Steve’s car. He had a worrying thought that he may end up destroying Steve’s seats. 
“Anything else?” Billy tried to keep the conversation pleasant, although he could tell that his tone was anything but friendly. He tapped his pencil against the desk, feeling like he needed to step outside for another cigarette before he could continue to play nice. Steve rested a hand on his hip as he thought for a moment. 
“How’s Kim been?” Steve asked softly after a moment, looking anywhere but at Billy. Billy felt his eyebrows raising onto his forehead as he felt a fresh wave of anger hit him. He began to wonder if Steve was asking him that question just to get a rise out of him. 
“Fine.” Billy shrugged his shoulders as he looked away from Steve’s brown eyes. He poked his tongue against the inside of his cheek, wishing he told Steve to fuck off instead. He knew that wasn’t what Billy meant when he questioned that. 
“I haven’t seen her for a few days,” Steve started slowly, “She seemed distracted.” Steve drew out slowly, looking genuinely concerned for a moment. Billy was confused for a second, not understanding why Steve would be so concerned. Kim was none of his business.
“What?” He asked, searching for some clarity in this situation. He wasn’t sure how Steve would have any idea how Kim was doing. They didn’t hang out, they weren’t friends. He felt a frown beginning to form on his lips, unable to help himself as jealousy pooled inside of him. 
“I gave her a ride on Friday,” Steve looked to be taken aback by Billy’s tone, even though he knew that Billy didn’t like Max or Kim being around him, “She didn’t say a whole lot.” He said as he furrowed his eyebrows together. He looked towards Billy, like he was searching for an answer. Billy nearly laughed, knowing that it wasn’t any of Steve’s business. 
“She talks when she’s comfortable,” Billy raised up from his elbows, “Do you want your car fixed or not?” Billy asked less vaguely this time, clearly not wanting to pretend that he was friends with Steve. Steve’s face irritated him in a way that he didn’t understand, nor did he want to think about too much. 
“No,” Steve paused for a moment, “I mean yes. I need my car fixed.” He mumbled as he passed his keys forward. Billy snatched them up quickly, hoping that it meant Steve would leave quicker. He spared the brown eyed boy another glance.
“They’ll call when it’s finished,” He replied dryly as he added his keys to the queue. He walked away from the desk, not caring if Steve stayed or not, “I’m going to take a fifteen.” He spoke towards one of the higher ups, hoping to relieve some of the stress that was bubbling inside of his body. He wasn’t sure why he felt so on edge, especially after his fight from yesterday. 
He stepped outside, enjoying how the sun and air felt as he leaned against the building. He took slow drags as he tried to will himself to relax, hoping that at least the rest of the day would go by faster. He didn’t like that Steve had given Kim a ride home but what really bothered him was that she had kept it from him. He'd ask about it later as he wondered if she'd been too worried that he'd get mad. He hoped that she didn't think that. The sound of the large door slamming open and then shutting again drew his attention away. He looked over surprised, noticing the familiar redhead joining him. He quickly glanced down at his watch, confirming that the time in his mind was correct. 
“What are you doing?” Billy asked her quickly. He paused for a second, realizing the way his tone sounded as her eyes widened in surprise, “I mean you should be in school. Did something happen?” He tried again, thinking that he sounded kinder this time around. Kim played with her hands, still looking unsure. She looked dainty as she pushed herself onto her tippy toes then back onto the flat part of her feet. 
“No,” She replied quickly, although she looked like there was something else bothering her. He watched her closely for a moment, watching the way she wrapped her curls around her finger, “It’s just study hall. It’s boring.” She shrugged her shoulders as she glanced around. He raised his eyebrow, knowing it wasn’t like her to leave school early at all. He was sure that she had never done such a thing before. 
“Okay,” He said softly, knowing he would pester her for more answers later. It was clear there was something wrong that she wasn’t saying, “Did you walk here?” He questioned, biting his tongue to snark off about her riding with Harrington. He knew it was dumb to be jealous, she obviously didn’t feel for him in that way. He couldn’t help but wonder if she’d be happier with someone like Steve. She nodded her head, her eyes glancing down as he stomped on his cigarette. 
“I got you something,” Kim mumbled as she approached him, “It’s nothing really.” She hesitated, looking as if she was regretting speaking up. He liked how bashful she grew, like she was trying to convince herself it was a bad idea.
“What have you got for me, Red?” Billy grinned, watching the way Kim took slow steps towards him. Her face burned as bright as a Christmas light as she slowly pulled the object from her bag. He had a sudden urge to cup her face and kiss her, wanting to devour all of the shyness that was hidden away. He watched as she began to unwrap the newspaper from the object. 
“It’s dumb,” She muttered shyly, sounding insecure as she held up the bulky object in her hands, “It’s just something I made in ceramics.” She brushed it off, as if it was no big deal. She kept her eyes trailed down towards the object, rather than looking towards him. She hesitated again but he reached for it, making sure that she couldn't hide it away from him. 
She hesitated before she held it out towards him and turned away quickly, like she was afraid of what his reaction would be. He took the object in his hands, noting that it was no longer than the length of his hand. It was in the shape of a surfboard, with the edges raised high with various slits. It was a pale yellow that faded into a darker green around the edges. He stared at it for a moment, feeling a strong sense of homesickness gripping deep inside of his stomach. 
“A surfboard ashtray?” He questioned her softly, making sure his guess was correct. He turned it over and brushed over where she had sketched her name and a heart into it. He felt a wide grin forming as he looked up towards her again. He wondered if she had any clue what she did to him. 
“It’s so bad,” She spit out quickly, “It’s not shaped how I wanted it to be, and I don’t like the way the blue came out. And it sort of chipped here. You can toss it.” Her face was still burning as she spoke, and she looked defeated as she glanced back towards the object in his hands. He could see the disappointment lingering in her eyes, but he couldn’t understand why she would feel such a way. He thought it looked beautiful and he was flattered that she thought enough of him to make him something. 
“Why would I toss it?” He asked her seriously, a little offended that she thought so little of one of the best presents he had ever received. No one had ever been so thoughtful to gift him something so special, much less hand make it for him. He loved it, even if there was a chip in it at the very top of the surfboard. 
“It’s ugly.” She said pitifully, bashfully as her eyes averted towards the floor. He cupped her small chin softly to make her look back towards him. He hated how unsure of herself that she could be. Her hazel eyes had a golden tint to them as the sun brushed against her features. He couldn't decide if that was his favorite part about her. He loved everything. Her pouty lips, expressive eyebrows and the freckles that decorated her skin. He felt his lips curling into a soft smirk as he thought of her perky tits and soft ass. He looked at her, admiring how pink her face had grown as she waited his answer. His eyes glanced over the curve of her cheek as he thought about how it had been bruised not too long ago. 
“I think it’s beautiful,” He told her honestly as he held eye contact with her, “Thank you. I love it.” He told her seriously, keeping a grip on her chin until she fully absorbed his words. He watched the way she exhaled softly, like she was fully accepting his compliment. She thought he was stubborn about accepting compliments, when he believed it to be the other way around. She had no idea how perfect she was, how crazy he was for her. 
“Really?” She smiled towards him, looking a bit brighter as she listened towards him. He felt his heart throbbing as he nodded his head in agreement. He really did think it was beautiful, but he would tell her anything if it meant she would always look at him this way. It made him feel better about himself. He didn't think he could really be that bad if someone like her looked at him in such a manner. 
“Really,” He liked how tall she was. It made it easy for him to lean forward and press his lips against her forehead. He lingered there for a moment as he finally realized how much he’d missed her the past two days. He felt like he hadn’t had nearly enough of her, “You know I used to have a surfboard like this when I was little, and my mom would take me to the beach.” He told her as he rotated the object in his fingertips again. He could easily tell how much time and effort she had put into it and part of him wondered why he was worth all of it. So far all he ever seemed to do was bring bad things into her life. 
“You did?” She perked up a bit more as she listened to his words. He licked his bottom lip as he nodded, knowing that she was waiting to devour more of his past. He breathed out slowly, feeling a burning inside of his chest as he thought of the memory. It was still so hard to think about, he wasn’t sure how he was supposed to talk about it without breaking down. 
“Yeah, it was similar colors,” He confirmed with a nod of his head, “Can I keep it in your bag until we get home?” The men in the garage were too reckless for his liking, he didn’t want his present to be destroyed. He was going to savor it, to forever keep it put up for only himself to use. 
“Sure,” She nodded as she pulled her backpack open again, “Do you have much longer?” She asked, sounding a bit hopeful. He didn’t mention that it was still fairly early, and he was sure that she was missing more than just study hall. She pulled her straps back over her shoulders and grinned at him, warming the deepest parts of him.
“Another hour or so,” He told her as he pulled the heavy door open again. He waited, letting her enter inside first, “Do we need to get Max?” He asked suddenly, unsure of the answer since Kim had left school early. She glanced back towards him. 
“No,” Kim shook her head, “Mom is picking her up.” She walked with him inside, shuffling a bit closer once some of Billy’s coworkers walked past them. She held her arms tightly in front of her chest, as if she could hide herself away. He bit his lip, still thinking about how cute she was when she got all shy. He'd tried to introduce her to his coworkers but all she could do was manage to squeak out a meek hello. Her face had been bright red, burning as brightly as a tomato. 
“Is Susan going to be mad once she realizes you skipped school to see me?” He asked her, his tone more serious this time around. He didn’t want Susan to be more upset with him than she already was. She kept her eyes drifting ahead, neglecting to look towards him. He exhaled quickly, already knowing her answer.
“She’s already mad,” Kim shrugged her shoulders, “I just want to be with you.” She replied quietly as the garage hummed to life around them. Billy wondered if he should send her back to school, but then figured that in the end she was right. Susan was already mad. There wasn’t anything they could do to change it. He hesitated before he nodded his head, thinking that there was little else he could do to intensify Susan’s hatred. 
“Alright,” He had an urge to kiss her but resisted doing so. He was fairly certain everyone here thought she was his girlfriend already, but he didn’t need anyone else finding out the truth. He wasn’t sure they were even considered a secret anymore, “I shouldn’t be too long.” He promised, wishing he still had his summer job with easy hours. He missed being able to see her all the time. 
He felt a lot more motivated to work with Kim waiting for him in the next room. It excited him, thinking about how lucky he was to have someone as sweet as her be interested in him. The rest of his shift passed a lot quicker, and he swore he even had a grin on his face as he worked. 
“Ready?” She asked eagerly as she waited for him by the door, her hands resting against the straps on her backpack. He bit back a grin, trying to keep from pinching her cheeks and telling her how cute she was. He nodded his head.
“Let’s go,” Billy nodded his head as he held the door open for her. She walked out first, smiling brightly as they walked towards his car. Billy quickly moved around her, moving so he could pull the passenger door open for her. She leaned against it for a moment, pausing as she smiled sweetly towards him. He pressed his finger against her nose again before she slid into the car, “Do you want anything before we go?” He asked, wondering if she wanted something to drink. She leaned forward against the console, sending him a look that he knew all too well. He was fairly convinced that she had no clue that she even sent him such looks. It seemed to be the only time her eyes weren't filled with complete sadness, rather with desire and want for him. 
“Yeah,” She breathed out shyly as her palm rested against his upper thigh. He bit his lip, raising an eyebrow as he pretended to be clueless. He liked when she spoke more, when she was able to tell him what she clearly wanted, “Can I suck you off?” She asked as she stumbled over her words, sounding unsure as her cheeks burned brightly. He couldn't ever imagine telling her no, but the cute way she asked him let him know that he was already hooked. He felt his cock beginning to throb inside of his pants, already begging to be touched by her. 
“Mhm,” He smiled as he leaned forward to peck her soft lips, “I wouldn’t ever say no to that.” He chuckled to himself as her hands began to search for the opening to his pants. He shifted his hips up off the seat for a moment, assisting her in tugging his pants down lower on his hips. He glanced around quickly, confirming that no one was around.
She exhaled as she slowly wrapped her hand around his soft dick. He winced for a moment as he felt her cold skin against his. She giggled softly as she glanced back up towards him, tucking her hair behind her ear as if she already knew what he was thinking. She slowly squeezed him, his cock already growing warm and beginning to harden from her simple touches. He grunted softly as she tugged on his cock, looking at it in full bliss.
“S’nice,” She complimented as she kissed the head of his cock. He grunted as she spit softly around his tip, slowly massaging her saliva down the length of his cock. He licked his bottom lip, enjoying how large he looked in her small hand, “Feels nice.” She mumbled as she flicked her eyes up towards him. She kept eye contact as she paused her movements to slowly lick up the base of his cock. He sighed roughly at the sensation of her tongue prodding against his balls. 
“Don’t tease me,” He told her softly as he tucked the strands of hair that had fallen loose behind her ear. She giggled softly as she glanced up towards him, looking more than eager to please him. He liked the way she was constantly observing him. He liked knowing that someone was just as intrigued with him as he was with her, “Wanna feel that pretty mouth.” He pressed his hips forward slowly, trying to encourage her. 
She tapped his tongue against her tongue, sticking it out far as she continued to tease him. He moved his hand down the curve of her back, squeezing her ass cheek in his hand. She moaned softly as she pressed his tip inside of her parted lips, stretching her jaw out as her saliva coated the length of his cock. 
He exhaled slowly as she slowly began to bob her head up and down, building a slow but steady rhythm. Her eyes stayed locked on his, constantly searching his expression as if she was doing it right. He groaned as he pushed more of her hair out of her eyes, delving into the feeling of being watched so intensely. He grunted as her hands cupped his balls, taking turns squeezing them as he continued to bob her head. 
“Fuck,” He pulled her hair back, not wanting to lose the sight of her eyes on his. He liked how she always stared back at him, like she was making sure that she was doing something right, “So pretty.” He mumbled truthfully, knowing that she was the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. She moaned from his words, and he fought the urge to snap his hips forward from how good the vibrations felt against his skin. 
He huffed in response to her movements, his cock feeling hot and heavy against her tongue as she lapped along the length of him. He squeezed her hair softly, enjoying the soft protest that left her lips. He liked how eager, how loud she was all the time. 
She gagged along his cock, his tip pressing against the back of her throat. He grunted, thinking about how pretty she looked as the drool slid out from the corner of her lips. He enjoyed how messy she got, how she wasn't afraid to drool over herself. It made him that much harder. He bit back his own whimper, thinking about how badly he needed to feel her cunt wrapped around him. 
“C’mere,” He begged as he slowly pulled her away from his cock. She pouted again but he ignored it as he tugged her small body onto his lap. She cautiously moved, looking up towards the roof of his car to make sure she didn’t hit her head. He worked quickly, beginning to undress her as he drank in the image of her naked body. He stared in bliss for a moment, admiring her perky breasts and soft curves. He rubbed his hands along her pale skin before he pinched her pale nipples, earning a squeal from her, “Sexy.” He complimented, knowing how easily those words drove her crazy. 
“Billy,” Kim giggled softly as she pushed her hair off of her shoulders. She moved her hands forward, quickly beginning to strip his shirt off of him. He laughed as he removed it, liking the way her eyes widened in anticipation. He squeezed her sides softly before he traveled the length of her arms. He roughly gripped her wrists as he held her arms back behind her back, liking the way she squirmed under his grasp, “Want you so bad.” She mumbled, her lips parting into a pout as she begged for him. He rubbed his tongue across his bottom lip, thinking that it was a shame to keep her waiting. 
He exhaled roughly, keeping her wrists tightly behind her back as he pushed himself inside of her wet cunt. He felt his eyelashes fluttering as the pleasure traveled up his body. Every time with her felt like the first. He stared at the way he slowly disappeared inside of her, her cunt squeezing him tightly as he filled out inside of her.
“Billy,” She whimpered, her pitchy voice sounding like heaven as she moaned for him. He licked his lips, enjoying how nice his name rolled off of her tongue, “It feels good.” She giggled softly, her lips parting in bliss as her cheeks grew warm. He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth as he slowly pressed his hips up forward, beginning to thrust into her.
“So pretty,” He mumbled out as he admired how tight her eyebrows were furrowed in pleasure and how her pink lips seemed to pout out as she moaned. She snapped her eyes open, looking as if she had to search for him. Her eyes wandered over his features as she slowly rocked her hips forward, beginning to search for her own pleasure, “So fucking pretty.” He repeated as he released her hands, finding the urge to touch more of her. 
He traced his hands up lazily across her hips as she began to move on top of his cock, breathy moans falling from her tongue as he continually moved his large hands up the curve of her body. He groaned as his hands cupped her perky boobs, squeezing them softly as she continued to build up a rhythm.
She was a wonder to him. He thought of how shy and sweet she had been at first, how she couldn’t bear to handle the thought of pushing his cock inside of her cunt. She was so much more confident now, even if she didn’t realize it. He knew the truth. He loved watching how eager and desperate she grew when his cock entered inside of her. 
She rolled her hips forward, grinding down against him as her hands moved across his biceps. He groaned as he pinched his fingers across her pink nipples. He grunted at the sensation of her squeezing roughly around his cock. He pushed his hips forward with her movements, loving how wet and warm she felt around him. 
He tilted his head upwards so his lips could meet hers in a rushed fury, wanting to taste the moans that were pouring from her lips. There was something so sensual about feeling her cry out in pleasure as he tasted her tongue against his own. He exhaled against her mouth as their moans mingled together in a similar way their tongues were lapping at one another. He pulled away slowly, a trail of spit connecting between their lips as he glanced back down at the way his cock was sliding in and out of her wet hole with ease. 
“Look at you,” He mumbled as a pleasure built in the pit of his chest as she looked towards him with furrowed eyebrows and pouty lips, “Such a whore for your big brother.” He felt his cock throb as her walls spasmed around him, her moans becoming louder from his dirty words. She watched him intensely as she rode him, her flush beginning to hide away the freckles on her body. 
“Oh god,” She breathed out roughly as he found his hands moving back to cup the curve of her ass. He squeezed her flesh in his hands, admiring the way her skin felt against his own. He pressed her down harder onto his lap, resisting the urge to snap his hips up harder. He felt such a carnal desire to devour her each time she was stuffed full of his cock, “Fuck me good big brother.” He was momentarily taken aback, still growing used to her pretty mouth that was becoming so filthy. He grinned as he squeezed her hips, his fingertips digging into her bony hips.
HIs rhythm became harder, faster as he snapped his hips forward in bliss. He grunted as he gripped her hips and rolled her hips down along the length of his cock. He exhaled roughly as her cunt gripped him tightly, trying to pull him further inside of her. He pressed his hand against her abdomen, grunting each time he felt a bulge pressing into his palm. 
His grip along her hips tightened as he rocked into her, desperately needing to feel more of her at once. He looked up at her in awe, a warmth spreading through him that he never felt unless he was with her. She made him feel alive in a way he would never understand. He was afraid if he let go, he’d lose that sensation entirely. 
“Billy,” Her nails were scratching at his skin as he bounced her along his cock, her walls clenching tightly as he rocked her forward. Her eyes crossed before they rolled back in her head. She was moaning loudly, her muscles beginning to constrict as he brought her to her high, “Right there. Oh god!” She cried out as she fell forward against him, her chin nestling into the crook of his neck as she shook around him. He felt his own eyes closing in pleasure as he gripped her lower back, urgently trying to keep her movements as he found himself growing nearer.
“Fuck,” He exhaled roughly, feeling as if she was milking his cock from how hard she was squeezing around him. Her thighs shook, bringing him even closer as he pressed down against her backside. His teeth raked against her shoulder, resisting the urge to bite down as he felt himself releasing inside of her, “Fuck, fuck.” He cursed harshly, his hips snapping up as he pressed her down just as hard. He groaned, rolling his hips as he painted the insides of her walls. 
Their chests rose and fell at the same time as they tried to collect themselves. He lazily drew patterns along her back as his heart thumped roughly inside of his chest. He felt a grin forming as she kissed along his neck, sucking softly as he rested his head against the seat again. He shivered when she licked below his right earlobe, a spasm of pleasure traveling down his neck and back. 
He exhaled harshly as she rolled her hips backwards, his softening cock pulling free from her drenched cunt. His dick bobbed up against her soft skin, pressing forward against her small tuft of dark red hair. He reached down between them, gently stroking it. He liked the color difference on her, how it matched her pink pussy. She blushed, looking a bit embarrassed from his actions. It made him grin again as he thought about how cute she looked. 
“Thank you for the surfboard,” He told her again gently. His eyes darted back down between her thighs, taking in the way his cum was coating her folds. He could feel his body growing warm, his heart beginning to race as he thought about her walking around with his cum coating her walls. She’d been the only one he’d ever wanted to bring that experience to life with. He liked how willing and open she was, how she was just as eager, “I’m going to put it in my room.” He told her honestly as he tilted his head up to kiss her.
Her giggle muffled against his lips as he moved against her with a new sense of urgency. His lips dragged along her own, licking and prodding against her swollen mouth. He could no longer taste her lip gloss but that didn’t stop him from trying to savor the taste of her. She always tasted sweet, like she had been eating too much candy. His tongue flicked against hers before she was pulling away, her hands gripping onto his jaw as she peered down at him.
She stared down at him, her eyebrows furrowed together like she was debating about something. He squeezed at her hips again, studying over her flushed cheeks and dilated eyes as he exhaled roughly. Her lips parted as she leaned forward, her fingers pressing his lips apart slowly. His insides curled as she moved closer to him, puckering her lips together before she was spitting into his mouth.
He groaned, his hips moving forward as he wished he was still hard enough to push himself back inside of her. He coated her saliva around his teeth, the roof and his mouth and his tongue before he swallowed it. He wasn’t sure how something so degrading and dirty had turned into something so sweet and sensual for them.
Her eyes were wide as she pulled away, still looking as if she was unsure about her actions. He wished she’d give herself more credit to fully realize just how crazy she made him. He tugged her closer to him, feeling like he was squeezing her too hard as a whimper left her lips.
“Ten minutes,” He begged as his hands traveled down towards her thighs and squeezed softly, “And we can go another round. Please.” He begged her, never tiring of having her body against his. He leaned forward, beginning to pepper kisses along her collarbone as she giggled in response. His hands moved up her thighs, beginning to crave the feeling of her wet cunt again. 
“We have to get back,” She reminded him, still sounding airy and full of life, “I can’t be too late.” She reminded him, although he was sure Susan would be upset no matter what time they got back. He prodded his fingers against her drenched entrance, beginning to push their mixture back inside of her fluttering walls. She gasped, glancing down between them as he kept his eyes trailed on her parted lips.
“You can’t just tease like that,” He grumbled underneath his breath as he easily slid two fingers inside of her. He grinned, watching the way her eyes fluttered shut as she began to rock against his movements, “Look how desperate you are. You just had my cock, was that not enough?” He mocked her, licking his lips as she began to grind against his knuckles. He huffed in bliss, watching the way her eyebrows furrowed together and her lips parted in pleasure. 
“It feels good,” She whimpered in defense, her cheeks already beginning to burn again. He groaned, his stomach twisting in pleasure as she squeezed tightly around his fingers. His eyes trickled down her neck, watching the way her boobs moved as she continued to roll her hips further along the length of his fingers. He groaned, leaning forward to bring one of her pink nipples into his mouth. He licked around it, sucking it softly as he felt it harden against his lips, “Oh, Billy.” She moaned out, sending chills up his spine. He loved when she moaned his name. It reminded him that they were real, that she was his. 
“Want you so bad,” He mumbled as he kissed along her perky skin. He dragged his tongue along her, glancing up at the way she had furrowed her eyebrows tightly together again. He could feel an ache growing in his abdomen, wishing he was shoving her full of his cock again. He dragged his teeth lightly against her nipple again as she gaped as he slid a third finger inside of her. He stretched her slowly as he pumped his fingers inside of her, wishing that he had prepped her enough to slide inside of her ass, “You’re so tight baby. Look at you fucking yourself on my fingers.” He encouraged as he squeezed her hip with his free hand. She slowly opened her eyes, pleasure overtaken inside of her pupils as she whined around him. She looked down between her legs, her hips becoming more frantic. 
He looked down from her features, enough to drink in the image of her slick coating his thick fingers as he pumped them inside of her. He exhaled roughly, enjoying the way she engulfed him so easily. It drove him crazy, thinking of how easily he could slide inside of her. He huffed as he pumped inside of her quicker, curling his fingers more urgently as he searched for the spot that made her breath hitch.
“Oh my god,” She moved her hands to his biceps, squeezing her skin in awe as she rocked against him. Her pitch became higher, her breathing more labored as the moans rolled off of her tongue. Her nails began to dig into his skin, piercing him as he thrusted into her rougher, “Right there. Oh god.” She was moaning louder, her sounds sweeter than any song or lullaby that he had heard. He kept the same pace, wanting to feel her coming undone around his fingers. He didn’t even care if he got his cock inside of her again, he just wanted to watch her cum around him. 
“So fucking hot,” He murmured as he felt his heart beating harshly inside of his chest. He groaned as her walls fluttered around his fingers, clenching tightly as her hips bucked forward as she cried out in bliss, “That’s it, baby. Wanna feel you.” He pleaded as he moved his lips closer towards hers. She cried out, digging her nails into his skin harder as her hips became more frantic. Their noses brushed against each other as she came undone around him. He continued to pump into her, enjoying the sounds that poured out from her lips.
“S’lot,” She whimpered, her nose dragging along the curve of his cheek as she moved closer to him. Her nipples brushed against his bare chest, sending a fresh wave of shivers up his back. He chuckled, still feeling her walls fluttering around his fingers as he slowly withdrew them. Her lips parted against his cheek, gasping as he did so. He chuckled, slowly dragging his messy hand up towards his lips as he swirled her sweet mixture from them. She watched with heavy eyes, her chest rising and falling, “You’re bad.” She giggled out at last as she gently squeezed his biceps. 
“Me?” He grinned as he withdrew his fingers from her mouth. He slid them around her waist, squeezing softly as he hugged her. She grinned as she nodded her head as her fingertips brushed against his back muscles. He tilted his head forward and pecked her lips, lingering against her mouth for a moment.
“Yeah,” She responded softly as she ran her nails across his skin gently, “Just in a teasing way.” She reasoned with him, looking like she was worried how he’d interpret it. He smiled softly, thinking it was cute how she was always looking out for him. He brushed his lips against hers again, trying to reassure her that he didn’t find anything wrong with her statement. He knew what she meant. 
“I know,” He told her after a second thought, remembering that she didn’t always pick up on his actions, “We better go.” He told her gently as he ran his hands across her sides again. She smiled, as she slowly began to clamber from his lap. He moved his hand on top of her head, carefully guiding her so she wouldn’t smack her head against the roof of his car. 
“Thank you.” She grinned brightly as she began to dress herself. He drank in the image of her for another moment before he followed her suit. He fumbled with his buttons for a moment as they settled into a comfortable silence. He thought for a moment, something still weighing heavy on his chest. 
“Hey,” He turned towards her, “Why are you skipping school?” He asked her seriously, making sure to hold her eye contact. She broke away first, shrugging her shoulders as she popped her knuckles. He winced at the sound as he lit up a cigarette. He was sure one day she’d break her fingers with as much as she did it. 
“It was just boring.” She said at last as she shimmied her panties back up over her slender legs. He thought about mentioning that she didn’t have to put them back on but lost the words in his mind over the serious look on her face. He blew out a puff of smoke.
“Kim,” He responded slowly as he reached over and squeezed her knee softly. She lurched at the sensation, “What’s going on?” He lowered his voice as he spoke, trying to be gentle as he approached the question. He rubbed her skin softly, hoping to relax her. 
“Will you answer one of my questions?” She continued to fumble with her fingers as she glanced towards him. He looked into her hazel eyes, watching the way the sadness mingled in with the colors. He was beginning to wonder if it was because she had been through so much at such a young age. Where his experiences had turned him cold and with hatred; hers had left her kind with her sadness swirling deep where she thought no one could see. He saw it. He always could see right through her. 
“Sure,” He considered her compromise for a moment as a bubble of anxiety rose within him. She had so many questions, so many unknowns that she was always trying to prod from him. It made him a bit nervous to fully commit. He inhaled sharply, deciding it was for the best, “What’s going on in school?” He asked her again, wanting to get down to the bottom of it. He felt his eyebrows furrowing together as anger rose inside of him. He knew how shy and awkward she could be, he hoped that no one was causing her issues. He’d make sure that they never did it again. 
“I have a few classes with Jason,” She twisted the ring around her chest as she spoke. He shot his eyes back up towards her at the mention of his name, “I know it’s stupid. He didn’t really do anything, but he just makes my chest feel so tight when I see him. It’s like I can’t breathe. He’s obviously angry and I don’t know, I don’t want to be confronted by him.” She rambled on as she spoke, beginning to talk with her hands as she made small gestures in the air. He absorbed her words for a moment as he tried to think of the best way to support her. 
“He shouldn’t be messing with you,” He told her hotly, his anger taking over without him realizing, “I’ll talk to him.” He said at last, already feeling the piping hot fury beginning to rise within his chest. He had no problem teaching the same lesson to Jason again. He would deserve it. Her eyes widened as she looked towards him. 
“No, Billy don’t do that,” She told him quickly as she held onto his bicep, “I don’t want to make the situation worse. He hasn’t spoken to me; I’m just freaking out over nothing.” She was speaking urgently as she squeezed his muscles in her hands. He looked over her worried features as he quickly took another drag in hopes that it would calm his nerves a bit. He rubbed his tongue along his teeth as he thought. 
“You’re sure?” He frowned softly, still feeling the anger in the pit of his stomach. He’d have no issue breaking Jason’s other arm and making sure he was out for the entire season this year. However, he didn’t want to go behind Kim’s back and do that without her knowledge. Not again. 
He gulped hard as he thought about telling her but was unable to form the words on his tongue. He watched as she traced her fingers down the curve of his bicep and his arm. He felt his skin prickling from the sensation, his anger momentarily contained. 
“Yeah,” She nodded her head as she tucked her hair behind her ears, “I’ve just been more on edge lately.” She tried to brush everything off with that claim again. He leaned forward to kiss her cheek, worrying that she was going to let everything bubble up at once. He wondered if she really knew what was happening inside of her. He didn’t want her to have another panic attack.
“You’ve been through a lot,” He reminded her softly. He turned for a moment to toss his cigarette out the window, “You are a badass.” He told her seriously as he faced her again. She giggled softly, her cheeks bubbling up into balls. He was sure she thought he was joking, but he was being completely serious. He had never had anyone stick up for him the way she had with Neil. He was appreciative of that. 
“Okay,” She glanced towards him before she looked back to his lap. She picked at her nails for a moment as she softly asked her question, “What’s your moms name?” Her question surprised him so badly that it nearly knocked the air from his lungs. He blinked hard before he gulped, trying to gain control of himself before he answered her question. 
“Oh,” He stared at her for a moment, “Rosemary. Her name was Rosemary.” The name rolled off of his tongue oddly, feeling alien. He couldn’t remember the last time he had thought of her first name or when he had heard it. Neil had stopped saying her name soon after she left, and Billy was sure that it only resided in the deepest part of his memory. He felt a lump forming in the back of his throat as he thought about how he couldn’t remember her last name or anything else about her. 
“That’s pretty.” Kim said softly as her eyes rose to meet his. She observed his features for a moment, but he didn’t feel like she sought for weakness within him. She was looking to make sure that he was alright, that he was comfortable speaking about his mother. He cracked a grin across his lips as he leaned forward.
“Not as pretty as Kimberly Rose,” He kissed her again, savoring how sweet she tasted against his lips. He kissed away any of his bitter memories, replacing them with the thought of her, “The prettiest name for the prettiest girl.” He teased her as he slowly pulled away, his lips dragging across her smooth ones. She giggled again, her cheeks heating up like it was the first time he’d ever complimented her. 
“You’re funny,” She exhaled roughly as she spoke, like she was too nervous to fully accept the compliment. He thought it was funny that she accused him of never accepting them, when she was just as guilty of it, “But very sweet.”  She promised him softly, her eyes flashing full of warmth as she spoke. Billy grinned in response, feeling as if she was the only person that had ever referred to him as sweet. 
The car ride was fairly lively as Kim flickered through the radio, singing loudly and rather badly to Dolly Parton’s Islands in the Stream. He shook his head, denying the fact that he knew lyrics from the many times he’d heard her listen to it. He had grown accustomed to her music the same way she had grown accustomed to his. He had even heard her listening to some of his tapes without him being around. 
“Home sweet home,” He teased her, knowing full well that neither of them viewed the trailer as home, “Do you need help?” He asked as she shimmied her backpack onto her shoulders again. She shook her head and he hoped that she remembered to give him his ashtray. 
“I’ve got it,” She smiled, nudging him gently with her arm. She walked up the creaky steps and he took a moment until she was walking inside the door, not wanting to cause the staircase to collapse underneath their combined weight, “Thank you though.” She added sweetly as she pushed the door open. Billy followed behind shortly, quickly noticing that something wasn’t right. The air in the room was cold, tense. 
“Do you have any idea how worried I was?” Susan demanded as they entered the room. She set down her bottle of vodka, leaving Billy to wonder how much she had already drunk, “I didn’t know where you were!” She snapped at Kim, looking just as furious as Billy knew she would be. He blew air out from his lips roughly, knowing that this had been a bad idea. 
“I tried to call,” Kim mumbled as she held onto the straps on her bag, “You didn’t pick up.” She shrugged her shoulders as she looked down to the ground. He was honestly surprised with her reaction. She had always been terrified to get in trouble and now she was acting like it was no big deal. He didn’t understand the sudden switch that had happened.
“That doesn’t matter,” Susan looked at her in disbelief, “That doesn’t give you a right to skip school.” Susan glanced towards Billy as if he somehow had a say in what Kim did. He raised his hands innocently, although he didn’t believe Kim should be yelled at for it. 
“It was just study hall.” Kim mumbled as she sat her bag down gently. Billy thought of his gift but thought that this wasn’t the best moment to reach for it. He lingered awkwardly in the room, wondering if he should leave or not. He began to walk towards the room, feeling like it was best for him to not be involved in this. Susan shot him a look, making him stop his movements completely. He exhaled slowly, realizing he was in trouble too. 
“I don’t care,” Susan snapped, “What’s gotten into you? You’re skipping school, sleeping with your brother and drinking my alcohol.” Billy lurched at the mention of being referenced as her brother again. Susan and Neil barely acknowledged them as siblings before, unless they were proving a point to other families. He glanced towards Kim curiously, tilting his head at the mention of her drinking. She hadn’t passed that information along to him. He was sure that she was too scared to try anything again. Perhaps he was wrong, but it still bothered him. 
“He’s not my brother,” Kim’s face was burning again as she straightened her shoulders, looking towards Susan with more defiance, “And I didn’t drink any of it.” He rubbed his thumb across his bottom lip as he took in Susan’s accusation. He observed Kim cautiously, not reading any lies across her features. He looked towards Susan again, debating about pointing out how she’d drunk through his six packs more than once. 
“I was married to his dad,” Susan staggered closer, clearly already more drunk than what she probably realized, “He is your brother. You can’t do that.” Susan demanded, quickly not keen on listening to anything Kim had to say. Billy glanced around before he put his hands in his pocket. He wasn’t used to Susan being so angry. 
“We’re not related!” Kim shouted louder this time, looking frustrated as her cheeks were beginning to turn pink. Billy rubbed the back of his head, understanding that the two of them were both too frustrated to hold a casual conversation. 
“And what about Max?” Susan spit out harshly, “What about that whole situation? You’d be fine just sharing a sibling?” She gestured dramatically between Kim and Billy. He winced as he glanced around, knowing Susan wouldn’t be happy if she knew his thoughts about the situation. He could care less if Max was related to the both of them. Hell, he probably wouldn’t care if Kim and him shared the same blood. He was too far gone to care about any of that. 
“He loves me,” Kim mumbled pathetically, “And I love him. Nothing else matters. We’re adults, we can pick our own future.” She nodded her head, acting as if that would be the final word. He exhaled softly, glad that she was sticking up for herself. He just didn’t know if this was the best way to do it. 
“You think you’re grown?” Susan spoke harshly, her voice shaking. Billy slowly peeled back the layers as he recognized the anger, the hurt and the betrayal in her eyes. He thought he saw a bit of regret, perhaps even remorse. He felt sick suddenly, even though he wasn’t the one being yelled at, “Go see if the two of you can survive on your own then. Go. I won’t stop you.” She motioned towards the door widely. Billy exhaled, doing his best to keep his mouth shut. He knew it wasn’t the right time to speak up. Susan was bitter, she would be. He still didn’t think that she deserved to speak to Kim that way. Kim was grown beyond her years; it was forced upon her whether Susan meant to do so or not.
“Mom,” Kim’s bottom lip wobbled as she spoke, her eyes looking even more dejected than usual, “Just calm down. It was one class. I won’t do it again.” Billy fought the urge to reach out towards her, wanting to give her some comfort. At the same time, he feared that he would only make Susan more upset. 
“You think that’s what I’m upset about?” Susan asked in disbelief as she began to stagger again. She held a finger up towards Kim, scolding her, “You lied to me. How could you do that?” She looked at Kim for answers, searching for why Kim would hide something so serious from her.
“I didn’t mean to,” Kim was crying now, leaving an aching deep inside of Billy’s chest, “I was afraid you’d act like this.” Kim spit out quickly, looking a bit resentful towards Susan. Billy sighed, wishing he knew what to say. He worried that whatever came out of his mouth would only make Susan angrier. Susan raised her eyebrow, looking even more stunned by Kim’s choice of words. She was quiet for a moment like she was trying to find the correct thing to say. 
“Why would you think I’d be happy for you?” Susan said at last, her voice sounding raspy from how quiet she was speaking. Billy felt a frown forming on his lips, knowing that Kim deserved a lot more than what she had gotten in life. Susan didn’t have to be happy with their decision, but he felt that Susan should at least try and be happy for Kim. 
“Because I found someone that I’m really happy with. Someone that I love,” Kim was sniffling loudly as she wiped her eyes. Billy found himself moving closer but quickly stopped at the dirty look Susan sent him, “Just because your marriages never worked out doesn’t mean you can push that onto me.” Kim’s voice shook from how harsh she spoke. Billy exhaled sharply at Kim’s words, understanding that she was looking for a way to hurt Susan now. 
“Are you serious right now?” Susan asked, sounding very hurt as she took another staggering step forward, “I gave up everything for you.” She sounded broken as she spoke, like she wished Kim would realize the things that she had gone through on her own. 
“I’m sorry I don’t have a reward to give you,” Kim breathed out harshly as the tears began to pour from her cheeks. Billy found his fingers clenching together, worried that she may have another panic attack. He reminded herself that she was grown, that she could still handle herself, “He makes me happy. I just want to be happy.” She sounded frustrated as she finished her statement, like all of her worries and stress was coming forth. Susan’s eyes slowly dragged towards Billy, making his heart pound roughly in anticipation. He waited for her to begin screaming, to begin accusing him of all the horrible things he was sure she was thinking. It felt like the very fragile relationship they had slowly begun to build had crumbled within a matter of hours. He breathed in harshly, wishing she would just hit him rather than speak whatever cruel words she had to say into existence. 
“You two can be happy together,” Susan pushed off from the counter, nearly falling forward. Kim and Billy reached out at the same time but were quickly shoved away by Susan. She glared at Kim, still looking hurt, “I won’t be a part of it.” She said at last as she walked towards the room. Kim slumped her shoulders forward, looking crestfallen as Billy stepped towards her. He gently rested his hand against her back, thinking of all the times she’d comforted him.
They were quiet for a moment, neither of them knowing what to expect when Susan approached again holding an overfilled bag. Max was hot on her tail, tears already streaming down her cheeks as she looked just as crestfallen as Kim. Billy was suddenly reminded of how young she was, and he was suddenly furious, wondering what Susan was thinking with the way she was acting.
“What are you doing?” Kim asked quickly, her tears rushing forward harder as Susan tried to step aside. Kim gripped onto the bag, making Susan face her, “Where are you going?” Kim demanded, sounding sterner as she spoke. Billy felt as if a stone was sitting in his stomach as a nauseous feeling spread over him. Too many memories began to flash inside of his own mind as he tried to remember the last time, he had seen his own mom. 
“Kimberly,” Susan’s voice was cold even though she was crying just as hard as the other two. She yanked her bag back towards her chest, dismissing Kim’s protests, “Just let me go. I can’t deal with this right now. I don’t want to be here and be reminded of everything that I’ve done wrong.” She waved her hand dramatically as if she was going through something so terrible. Billy bit his lip hard, beginning to grow irritated that she was making the situation all about herself. 
“It’s nothing you did,” Kim was blubbering, “Just don’t go. I know we can work through this. Please.” She begged, sounding like she was a little kid. Billy felt sick, wondering how many times he had begged for his mom to come back too. He rested his weight against the counter, suddenly feeling weak in the knees. 
“Mom don’t go,” Max pleaded with her, “Everything is fine.” She tried to convince Susan as well, sounding just as desperate. Billy thought of how young she was again, how this would be the second parent to walk out on them in such a short amount of time. He was speaking before he fully recognized his thoughts. Nothing mattered as long as Susan stayed with them. 
“Susan, look,” Billy breathed out quickly, “I can stay somewhere else. It’s fine.” He ignored Kim’s look of protest, how her eyes widened in fear. He wasn’t sure how else he could reassure her that he’d always be around. He just didn’t want them to lose Susan. 
“No,” Susan brushed the two girls off slowly, looking like it pained her to do it, “I just need to clear my head. I’m suffocating. I just need a break.” She sounded like she was begging them now. Billy bit back the rising fury, thinking about how shitty it was to leave just because she needed a break. He supposed it would eventually be fine. She hadn’t paid the rent last month anyways, she’d be out of money before she knew it. Especially now that she was jobless. 
“That doesn’t mean you have to leave,” Kim was hiccupping from how hard she was sobbing, “We won’t do anything like that again. I won’t skip school or do anything bad.” He felt a somber feeling settling deep inside of his chest at the way she was speaking. He was sure that she had never missed a class before in her life. She was going through something rough, and he was sure Susan didn’t even see it. She was blinded by her own anger, her own hurt to even pay attention to her daughters. 
“Just a night away,” Susan pushed Kim’s hands back towards her chest, “Please.” She looked at Kim seriously, waiting for her to nod her head in agreement. Max exhaled harshly, her voice breaking as she turned away from Susan. Her blue eyes were filled with tears as she walked towards Billy, her arms around his waist before he could react. He was stiff for a moment before he relaxed, letting her cry into his chest as he thought about the first time, she’d ever hugged her. It had been a similar moment like this, full of tears. 
“Okay,” Kim sounded just as defeated as she spoke up, “You’ll be back in the morning?” She looked down at Susan pleadingly, looking like she couldn’t stand the idea of Susan being gone any longer. Susan hesitated before she nodded, and Billy was sure that she was already regretting her decision. He was sure she’d be back quicker than that. Susan had stuck through so much; he couldn’t see her just walking out on them now. Perhaps she really did need to clear her head for a bit. 
“In the morning,” Susan confirmed as her eyes scanned the room. Max’s arms grew tighter around his waist, nearly knocking the air from his lungs as she avoided Susan’s gaze. He squeezed her softly, hoping that she knew it would eventually be okay, “I’ll be back then.” She nodded her head, sounding like she was talking to herself more than to them. She turned quickly, taking all of the tension and anger with her as she left the trailer. Billy closed his eyes for a short period, wondering if he had ruined Kim’s life. 
////////////////
Billy was pacing in his room for what felt like hours until he couldn’t handle it anymore. He left the room, tired of constantly checking to see if Susan had arrived again. Max and Kim had been quiet, other than to come out to use the bathroom. They both looked awful, like something had run them over. He was sure they were thinking about a lot more than Susan leaving.
He hadn’t been able to rile either of them for dinner, instead he sat alone and thought about how he had ruined their relationship with Susan. He kept waiting for Max to come out and scream at him, to blame him. She never did. 
He walked down the dark hallways and pushed the door open, glancing inside to see where Kim and Max had cocooned themselves into the same bed. He walked forward slowly, his heart hammering pathetically in his chest from how awful he felt at the moment. He didn’t know how to help Kim, how to assure her that everything would be fine. Everything had changed in such a short amount of time and now Susan was gone. 
“You can join us,” Kim offered as she rolled over slowly. He felt more pity filling his chest, realizing that she wasn’t even sleeping in this state, “There’s lots of room.” She scooted over some more, inviting him in easily. He felt flattered but also knowing that he didn’t belong. 
“It’s okay,” His words fumbled around in his mouth as he spoke, “I just wanted to check on you two.” He shrugged off her suggestion, not wanting to be a bother. She looked at him softly, looking as if she had more to say. 
“Just get in the bed,” Max huffed as she scooted further towards the wall, “It’s not that big of a deal.” She told him seriously. He paused before he followed her commands, shifting in the bed next to Kim. He wanted to hold onto her but denied himself the chance while Max was awake. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. Kim shifted back onto her side, still holding onto Max tightly. 
The room was silent other than the occasional sniffle. Billy really wasn’t sure who the sound was coming from or how he should offer them any comfort. He laid on his back, his hands linked over his stomach as he stared up towards the glow in the dark stars that Kim had pinned up on the ceiling. He listened until he was sure that Max had fallen asleep. He slowly shifted, drawing his hands close around Kim’s waist and pulled her towards him.
She said nothing but melted against him easily, her breaths were still labored as her fingers wrapped around his own. She squeezed softly, her thumb rubbing on top of his knuckles as she relaxed against his touch. He nestled his chin against her shoulder, he wrinkled his nose as her hair tickled against his nostril. He quickly moved it out of the way before he settled against her again. She pressed her cheek up against his.
“You can’t leave me,” She turned her cheek, sitting up in the bed so she could look at him better, “I mean it. Where you go, I go.” She poked his chest softly, sounding very serious as she spoke. He sighed softly as he cupped her fingers against his hand. 
“I was trying to calm Susan down,” Billy told her honestly, “I’d never leave you. I would never hurt you like that.” He promised her, knowing just how deeply the hurt of being abandoned stuck around. He didn’t want to lose her, not ever. She was made for him as far as he was concerned. It didn’t matter what else happened or who came into their lives. 
“What if she doesn’t come back?” Kim asked after a moment, her bottom lip quivering as she spoke. Billy felt a frown forming on his lips as he leaned forward to press his lips against hers. She sniffled softly and he wondered how raw her cheeks must be from crying so much. 
“She will,” Billy encouraged her, “She’s just drunk. I bet she’ll be back in the morning, passed out on the couch.” Billy drew the image up in his mind, hoping that he would be correct in the morning. He didn’t want Kim to miss out on having a relationship with her mother. Especially when it would be his fault. 
“I don’t like the way she’s acting,” Kim admitted softly, “She’s acting how my dad used to.” She sounded like she was a small child as she spoke. He frowned softly as he played with their fingers together, gently squeezing them as he reassured her that he was here for her. He thought Susan was shitty for leaving for the night but hated the thought of Sam and everything he’d done to the girls. Kim deserved a better dad than that. 
“Did he threaten to leave?” He asked softly, hoping that it may help to talk about it. He didn’t like to ask about Sam too much, as it always left him angrier than he could explain. He still couldn’t understand how Sam could leave someone like Kim behind. He could understand why his mom eventually left, even if it didn’t make him happy. Clearly, she already knew that he’d end up just like Neil. Kim was different. She was pure and sweet and good. He didn’t know why anyone would want to leave her behind. 
“Not to us,” Kim was speaking softly, clearly afraid that she would wake Max up with her words, “He used to tell mom that a lot when they would fight. They really hated each other.” She said at last, her eyes looking distant as she thought about the memories. Billy felt like he had a million different things to ask her. He wanted to ask her about what Steve had said, about the alcohol and if Addi had mentioned anything about Eddie. However, he knew that this wasn’t the right time to discuss any of that. She was hurting. He just wanted to comfort her.
“We’re not like that,” He promised her as he cupped her cheeks gently, “We’re better than our parents were. We won’t make those mistakes. I promise."
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freyaswolf · 1 year
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Hellcheer thoughts...
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I've had these random thoughts bouncing around in my brain for way too long, so I'm writing them out and sharing. Now they're your problem.
🖤 If Chrissy somehow came back from the dead, her mom would be so mad about it. Because that would take the attention off her and on the "miracle" of her daughter being alive. She would absolutely disown Chrissy, claiming she was some demon masquerading as her daughter. Chrissy would show up on Eddie's doorstep (because we are pretending their trailer wasn't destroyed) with a couple of suitcases and boxes packed into her tiny car (car is a hand me down from a friend who graduated the year before, her mom would never buy her a car).
🖤 Eddie treats Chrissy like she is a precious treasure, but not as though she's weak or incapable because he's seen the steel in her. He would get overwhelmed when they're in close proximity, like working around each other in the tiny kitchen he would get so easily distracted. He would be able to smell her shampoo, and would just stop dead in his tracks. But he loves it. They're doing that back and forth dance, because they haven't quite become a "thing" yet, until they do. And he loves when they do, because now he's allowed to be close, breathe her in, and everything stops, and nothing else matters. His priority is to make her feel safe, and he encourages her to be herself, whoever that new person is. She's never been free to express how she feels about anything and everything, and she might go a little crazy at first, drunk with freedom. He helps her work through a few of her body image issues, and encourages her to find s doctor or therapist who can help her more, no shame or judgement. Being out of her parent's house has removed the major stressor/trigger for her disordered eating, and having that out of her life helps a lot.
🖤 Chrissy starts hanging out with Nancy, Robin, Max, and El (AND BARB because she also deserved better and was a great friend), and a couple of her cheer squad friends who were actual friends, and they all help her blossom. As does Mrs. Wheeler, who takes Chrissy under her wing. Karen Wheeler is PISSED at Chrissy's mom, and even goes off on her in the grocery store one day when she tries to say something shitty about Chrissy.
🖤 When Eddie and Chrissy get stoned together sitting out on a blanket behind the trailer, Chrissy talks shit about her mom and Jason. She has zero filters when she's stoned!
🖤🖤BONUS🖤🖤
This is a "What if" kind of AU idea. Basically Hellcheer, but make it Disney:
What if Chrissy's mom, isn't her birth mother? What if her "mom" is in fact a wicked step mother? Chrissy's actual mother died in childbirth, and her evil/wicked sister or best friend stepped in. Laura was super jealous of her sister/best friend for being prettier and more adored than she was, and she takes her jealousy out on Chrissy who is a carbon copy of her mother. Chrissy's younger brother is actually her half brother. After her mom disowns her, her dad comes by the trailer with a box of pictures and mementos that he saved/hid from Laura so she couldn't throw them out like she did with everything else that belonged to Chrissy's mom. He explains everything, apologizes and gives her pics of her actual mother. Tells Chrissy all about her, and how proud she would be of Chrissy. She would ask, "Why don't you leave her dad?" and he would tell her "I'm not as strong as you are pumpkin, I'm so sorry for everything. Maybe someday I'll be as brave as you are. You take after your mom, she was a fighter too." Her dad would have a talk with Wayne, and lets him know how to reach him if they need anything. He makes sure Chrissy gets a generous allowance so she can focus on school and graduating and so she doesn't have to get a job unless she wants to.
Of course, all of my ideas end with Eddie and Chrissy living happily ever after. Neither of them is perfect, but they are perfect together, and their differences manage to compliment each other. 🖤
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Only Ours
Fandom: Stranger Things
Rating: T
Pairing: Steddie, Dustin x Suzie
Category: fluff, songfic, domesticity, established relationship
Summary: Dustin blinked at them, surprised. "Wait, Steve. You...don't have one?"
"One what?"
"A song. For you and Eddie?" Dustin tried again, eyes shifting between them as if he expected it to be some kind of a joke. "Come on, isn't that like a classic relationship thing?"
Eddie learns that Steve would very much like them to have a couple song and since he's the only one with any musical taste in this relationship, it's up to him.
You can also read it HERE.
I fully support the idea I read in other fics that if Eddie were to get a cat, its name would be Ozzy. In fact, I believe that Eddie would spoil the cat rotten and tell the cat that whatever it did was "so metal, darling" and Steve would self-combust with jealousy over a cat. Except Ozzy would sometimes do the cat thing where their alliances change in a split second and Eddie would be left with two sassy and gorgeous creatures who'd team up from time to time just to keep him on his toes.
Why 1990 you ask? Because the perfect song for my boys only came out then.
Oh yeah, now the story.
December 1990, Hawkins, Indiana
Four years ago, the world didn't end, although it certainly tried. Steve's head throbbed just thinking about it, so he mostly just attempted not to. Some people had been reported missing but were, in fact, dead. Other people had died but then it turned out they were just resurrected/transported into another dimension/kidnapped to Russia. The ground split in Hawkins in an angry X shape and killed more people, injured some and destroyed a large chunk of the town. Levitation, gruesome deaths, terrifying sounds of crunching bones, Hawkins had it all. And since most official channels were useless, it was up to the Hawkins' young and finest, sometimes also weirdest and some additions from other places like California, to do something about it. Which they did, yay, world saved and all, now back to your lives, college, high school, you name it, and keep that trauma under the wraps, yeah? Others might not understand.
Apart from the interdimensional monster fighting, superpowers, government conspiracies, possessions and more Dungeons and Dragons references than he ever cared to know, Steve also had a few surprising personal revelations.
One, his parents sucked. Not slightly, not subjectively, but massively and in so many ways that his brain decided You know what, let's just erase this shit. He sometimes wondered if that was the reason why he felt so stupid, that his head just decided that in order to get rid of the thoughts of his parents, everything else from that time should also go. When they decided to leave Hawkins for good and graciously left him the house sitting next to a melted line in the ground, he breathed a sigh of relief. There had been a time when he'd give anything for them to notice him, but after the hell of 1986, his friends threw a Farewell, suckers! party (well, Eddie and Robin did and Nancy, Jonathan and Argyle happily joined) and after raiding his father's alcohol stash, setting up an improvised shooting range outside with their perfect family photographs and desecrating his mother's beloved tablecloth with red wine, he felt unexpectedly free. He could do anything he wanted and...yeah. He'd have to figure out where to start with that.
Two, he had no fucking clue what he wanted, but fortunately his heart didn't wait for the brain to catch up and just pointed in the direction of recently resurrected Eddie Munson and shouted "GO!". Steve should have probably found it confusing, he should have had a sexuality crisis, but he was so tired after all that crap, Eddie was actually great and his eyes were pretty, and maybe it wasn't figuring out his sexuality but rather finding a person he clicked with. He still liked boobies, but he also liked Eddie. Robin tried to educate him on what he was, but after seeing a few of their disgustingly romantic looks, she just settled on Eddiesexual. Steve didn't protest (much).
Three, he still was a romantic. Steve had always played up the romantic side with the ladies and did what was expected of him, wooing, flowers, dinners, all that, because that's what you were supposed to do. But he was completely clueless when Eddie agreed to date him. What do you get a guy for a date? Or more precisely, what do you get Eddie? As it turned out, he was overthinking for no reason because all the roads led to Eddie's heart. It took a while for him to calm down, but Eddie took everything in a stride and even when Steve knocked on his door, sleep-deprived and babbling about the prettiest flower he saw on his way from work that reminded him of Eddie and he just had to pick it for him, Eddie would just grin, say "another score for the Harrington charm, come on in big boy" and wear the flower proudly in his hair until it wilted.
All of these revelations lead to some changes in his life. When things settled down, he sold the house, not sparing a single look when he shut the door behind him for the last time. It was a final goodbye to his prior shitty life and when he moved to a much smaller, older and cheap, but cozier house, he felt like he could breathe again. Then Eddie moved in with him, as they both decided the distance was not too great, but absolutely unnecessary. And when Eddie suggested getting a pet together, Steve's first thought was his father's voice, saying Absolutely not, animals are messy, there is no merit to them, Steven. The second thought was giving that voice the finger, grabbing the his keys in one hand, Eddie's wrist in the other one and driving to the nearest shelter. So year 1990 saw him living a comfortable, quiet life with Eddie and Ozzy (because what else would Eddie Munson call his cat, right), both working not very prestigious but normal jobs. They would still meet their friends often, the whole survived-the-end-of-the-world squad might have left Hawkins here and there, but always returned, as if there was a magnetic pull to the place. It was probably just difficult to feel fully at home somewhere else, where no one understood your caution, your quirks and nightmares. With Nancy and Robin's support ("Nagging," Eddie corrected him, "it's called nagging, Harrington"), both Steve and Eddie applied to a community college and got in, seeing it both as a good step forward in their lives, but also a much needed fuck you to the Harrington senior expectations and Munson predetermined criminal future.
And hey, it wasn't the life Steve had imagined before, but it was so much better than any fantasies he had for his future with Nancy because what he had with Eddie was real, it was domestic and comfortable and just home. They got to see their kids grow up and couldn't be prouder of them, even though they had at least one of them over every single day, providing relationship guidance and reassuring them that even if, for some unimaginable reason, their college dreams didn't work out, it wasn't the end of the world (because that was a bit more dark, screechy and filled with floating particles), that things work out in the end, look at them, community college and all, who would have thought that the former jock with more hair than brain cells and a metalhead who took three years to graduate would do so well for themselves?  You have nothing to worry about, nothing at all.
When Dustin got older, he and Suzie finally started travelling to see each other. He would often complain to Eddie and Steve during his visits that even all those years later, his friends would always send him on his way with a heartfelt rendition of Never Ending Story and sadly, Eddie didn't turn out to be as sympathetic to his plight as Dustin might have hoped. When he learned the finer details of the Starcourt debacle and how the world was saved by Suzie's genius and Dustin's voice, Eddie collapsed into Steve and howled in laughter while Dustin mouthed "traitor!" at him. Steve just grabbed the nearest pillow and offhandedly muffled Eddie's outburst.
"Don't take it personally, man," he told Dustin while Eddie choked and gasped for air under the merciless fabric. Somewhere in the room, Ozzy gave a concerned chirp, but Steve ignored it. "I think it's cute and they might be jealous, you know? I think it has to be really nice to have a song like that," he smiled at him and eased his grip on the pillow. "Will you behave now, Munson?" A muted confirmation seemed to be enough and Eddie sat back up, trying to fix his hair which now looked like a bird's nest.
Dustin blinked at them, surprised. "Wait, Steve. You...don't have one?"
"One what?" He wasn't really paying attention, trying to untangle Eddie's rings that got stuck in his curls. This man needed a constant supervision and Steve was the right man for the job.
"A song. For you and Eddie?" Dustin tried again, eyes shifting between them as if he expected it to be some kind of a joke. "Come on, isn't that like a classic relationship thing?"
Steve's ears went slightly pink. "Um, no. I don't think I've ever had one. But I think it's really cool and you and Suzie have something like that, don't let those other shitheads ruin it for you." His smile was genuine and comforting, but Dustin's mind was already racing.
He turned his focus to Eddie, frowning. "Really, Eddie? All that musical knowledge and not a single song for the two of you?"
Eddie hugged the pillow that had nearly cost him his life seconds ago and grabbed a strand of his hair, pulling it in front of his face. "I don't...I don't think it ever came up?" he says, eyes darting to Steve. "Why didn't you say that was what you wanted, Stevie?"
Steve just shrugged, the pink hue returning. "Um. I always thought it came up naturally? Like. When you get your first kiss during a song or something, then it's your song?"
"Well, yeah, it can be like that, I guess," Eddie admitted, frowning. "But I don't think there are any rules to it. And if there are, screw them. You're gonna get that song, baby, no matter what. Time for some research." He slapped his thighs and suddenly jumped up, rushing from the door. By the sounds from the next room, Eddie was rummaging through his entire musical collection.
Steve stared at Dustin with furrowed brows. "What...has just happened?"
Dustin rolled his eyes. "It's called communicating your wants and needs, Steve."
From that moment on, Eddie started something that could only be called a quest. He was completely serious about fulfilling this single wish and while he normally played his music at obnoxious volumes, he ended up digging up his walkman and listening to tens of tapes, scribbling his notebook and whenever Steve approached him, Eddie would stop the track and shoo him away. Steve was growing concerned with the amount of time Eddie was spending on...well...his wish. He tried to backtrack, told Eddie that it wasn't a big deal, it didn't really matter that they didn't have their song, but Eddie always cut that crap short. "Steve. If I can do this one single thing for you, why the hell wouldn't I? Let me handle it. If I have a candidate, you will be the first one to know, okay?"
And so Steve waited. It took weeks and he was slowly getting worried that he set Eddie up for a failure, because while they met here and there in their musical taste, it wasn't exactly compatible or anywhere near the love song territory. So when Eddie finally called him over one evening, just after the holidays, he was equally excited and terrified.
"So," Eddie started, clearing his throat. "I just want to let you know that I tried to take everything into consideration. Our styles. Suitable lyrics. I went through a ton of songs, and trust me, there are tons that feel like they are about us, but I was...I was trying to find something that would represent how I see you. And I think...I think I finally found it, but it's just a suggestion. If you don't like it, we can drop it."
Steve recognized the album before Eddie could continue, it was one of the newer ones that Eddie picked up and he had to chuckle, more in amusement than disappointment. "Slaughter?" he snorted and pointed at the band name. "Really, Munson? I mean, sure, sounds about right for what we went through-"
"Will you just - can you please shut that pretty mouth of yours and listen to it?!" It could have sounded annoyed, except not really, because Eddie was never mad about Steve's music preferences (or lack of them). Only then did he notice that Eddie looked genuinely nervous, his eyes were everywhere but on Steve and he was chewing his lip with enough force to make it red and swollen. He was wringing  his hands and pacing in the narrow space of their room, back and forward, only squeezing two steps in before spinning around on his heel. Ozzy gave a quiet mrrrow and rubbed against his ankle, almost making Eddie trip. After the stream of creative insults against the poor (but definitely not sorry) creature ended, Eddie sighed and picked the now very content cat up, rubbing his chin. "Seriously, Stevie. It's not a joke, I swear, I just...when I heard it, I immediately thought of you, you know? I mean, it says Lady instead of...I don't know, Stevie, but I guess that would be too specific and it's not like we're the target audience, I guess. I can sing that line for you though. If that bothers you. So just try it, please. If you don't like it, I will never bring it up again." He finally looked at Steve and how could he refuse those beautiful dark eyes?
Steve felt the involuntary rise of the corners of his mouth, something that Eddie brought into his life. Dustin was always making fun of Steve grinning like an idiot in the presence of their dungeon master, but Eddie liked it, often pinching his cheeks and peppering kisses over his forehead until he turned Steve's chronic frown upside down ("but with less bats," he always added and that was a guaranteed chuckle right there). So if Eddie liked him smiling, Henderson could bite Suzie's...computer. Crossing the short distance between them, he stroked Ozzy's ears and kissed Eddie on the lips, short and sweet. "Of course, Eddie. Even if it's not the one, I always appreciate you broadening my music horizons," he remarked with a grin.
"Oh, you don't." Eddie's shoulders finally relaxed and he laid Ozzy on the bed, petting him in place of an apology. "Sit down with me, yeah? Before the majestic feline decides to maul me for my insolence." With that, he leaned over to the cassette player and hit play.
Okay, so the initial guitar wail may have freaked him out a little. Eddie didn't do a low or even a medium volume. He flinched and his hand on Ozzy's back twitched, but then Eddie's fingers were over his and... Hm. The intro isn't that bad. Not romantic, but nothing scream-y or too heavy. Actually, the melody wasn't bad at all. Steve gave Eddie an encouraging smile and the marvelled at the returned grin.
And then the singing started. A bit husky, yet still melodic, but that didn't matter because all he could focus on were the lyrics.
I've been livin' in this lonely world
Wishin' I could find someone to love
Hopin' someone would come from above
Change my life
Steve's breath hitched. That hit too close to home. Way too close. His fingers started trembling, but Eddie's hand was there, warm, large and with callouses felt so good on his skin.
Then I noticed you there
You were my angel sent from my despair
I know that you are the lady who cares
Eddie's grin became more muted now, a bit unsure as he mouthed Stevie over the lyrics, but Steve tightened his grip on the other man's hand. Ozzy made a chirp of disappointment and left the bed for something more fun because the back scratches were becoming infrequent, but Steve didn't even notice.
I want to spend my life with you
I want to spend my life with you
With you
He felt like he might cry. His eyes burned a bit and oh, he got it now, why Eddie would think of him and why he could only think of Eddie with this song. Those long fingers were caressing his knuckles as if he was the most precious piece of fine art he'd ever seen and there was so much fondness in Eddie's eyes, those stubborn wrinkles around them showing as he kept smiling and Steve loved him so much he didn't know how to cope. He redirected his straying focus back to the lyrics because Eddie wanted him to hear them. Eddie picked this song for them, for him.
I think of all of those sleepless nights
To survive
It's like the earth was standing still
You know I hardly had the will
A bitten off sob escaped Steve's throat. He was used to hiding his soft side from everyone, but never from Eddie because he never made fun of him, never judged. Eddie might have chuckled to himself when he noticed Steve's glassy eyes and uneven breathing during romantic movies, but he always pulled Steve closer, arm around his shoulders, burying his face in that luscious hair and never commenting on the dampness on his t-shirt. Steve still couldn't understand how or why, but he had learned - with Eddie's stubborn support - that he was not only loved, but loved for exactly who he was.
Then I noticed you there
You were my angel sent from my despair
I know that you are the lady who cares
I want to spend my life with you
I want to spend my life with you, baby
My lady
You're true
He wasn't exactly crying, well, not sobbing, but there were a few rogue tears and Eddie just moved closer, pulled Steve against him and began stroking his hair, all while gently swaying to the music. Steve was so, so thankful that Eddie understood, that he didn't panic or immediately halt everything because something made him cry. Perhaps that was the definition of true love, to be known and still loved, to enjoy the nearness and choose the lazy domestic mornings and slight annoyances over temporary butterflies.
I want to spend my life with you
I wanna spend my life with you
Only with you baby
I want to spend my life with you
You know you're my little angel
I want to spend my life with you
Okay, that was it. He couldn't just wait for the song to finish, not now and certainly not with Eddie right next to him. Steve tackled his boyfriend onto the bed and Eddie produced an undignified squeak when Steve spun them around, burying Eddie's upper body in their mountain of pillows. He only had a second to appreciate Eddie's delighted bark of laughter before kissing him silly, not caring for once that his tears were visible and dripping down onto Eddie's face. He would have loved to be a bit more refined in his technique, but he was (in Dustin's words) an emotional mess, so enthusiastic and wild it was. Not that the rest of the lyrics were helping in regaining of composure.
Oh don't you knowI want to spend
All of my life with you babe
'Cause you gave me all your lovin'
And baby I know it's true
'Cause you're the only one for me
Baby I'm the one for you
The song was becoming quieter and he could feel Eddie's hand fumbling on the player and pressing stop. Then it returned to his hair and Steve might have forgotten to breathe, but it was becoming obvious that he wasn't getting out of talking that easily. Eddie's hungry kisses were slowing down, becoming gentler and finally turning into little pecks. He managed to grab Steve's jaw and take a shaky breath. "Holy shit, big boy," he laughed and stroked the moles on his boyfriend's throat. "I gather that's a Yes, I like it?" he whispered, still grinning.
Steve wiped his eyes and leaned his forehead against Eddie's. "As if you couldn't tell. Yeah. Yeah, I liked it. A lot. I think...I think it's the one, Eddie. If you're okay with it."
Eddie pumped his fist in the air victoriously. "More than okay. I guess I'm just relieved it wasn't a complete miss, I hadn't been that nervous since I was a teenager. I mean, I wish this song existed when we got together, it would have been a much easier confession and it would still hit all the points." He stilled when he heard a sharp intake of breath. "I hope you're okay with all of them...?"
"Shit, Eddie," whispered Steve and buried his face into Eddie's t-shirt. "I loved it. All of them, but that...chorus, I think, that one the most." He wondered how to say the million things swirling in his mind, how this song managed to silence the "bullshit" he had always feared, how he'd never thought anyone would ever say these words to him. To be someone's absolute choice.
To his surprise, Eddie just laughed and hugged him like an octopus, hands, feet, all crushing Steve in a long-limbed hug. "Ah, yes. You seemed surprised at that, so let me ask you. Do you really doubt I want to spend all the years I have left and then some with you, Steve? When we live together," he nudged Steve's side gently, making him squirm, "we have six kids and a cat," another nudge, another squirm, "we're in the middle of saving for that dream road trip of yours and, most importantly, you make the best goddamn pancakes in Hawkins? Jesus, Stevie. I'm not giving you up, even when you're much older, bald and you spend all your day bitching about Max and Lucas's kids skating on our sidewalk. You're stuck with me, so deal with it."
Steve smiled through his tears and leaned down into that tight, crushing embrace. "Yeah. That works for me. I do want that, Eddie, all of that. And..."
Eddie relaxed his arms and tilted his head at Steve's hopeful tone. "And, Stevie?"
Steve's breath tickled Eddie's ear as he whispered: "You said you had more songs that reminded you of us. I'd like to hear them."
He laughed then, free and wild, as if that was it, that was the ultimate highlight of his life. Nothing better would ever happen, except that was a lie, wasn't it? In a life with Steve Harrington, this was just the beginning. "Are you asking me for a mixtape, Steve? After four years?"
"Mhm." Steve's lips moved to Eddie's throat and well, it looked like a turtleneck for tomorrow and the day after that. He found it difficult to remember why it was a bad thing. "I can offer those beloved pancakes of yours as a compensation."
Eddie moved his leg to the side and threw off Steve's balance, flipping them around. "Oh baby, you've got yourself a deal" he grinned before gently nudging Ozzy out of the door and closing it, because some things were definitely not meant for cat eyes and ears.
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No beta, we die like all the characters whose names begin with B, so sorry. I don’t have a beta reader and I’m fully aware there are some gramatical errors, if anyone is willing to put up with a non-native speaker raging over all the “perfect” tenses, I will love you forever.
Oh yeah. The song is Spend My Life by Slaughter.
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lovestuckyhatemarvel · 7 months
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And I’m watching episode 3 now. Let’s see how this goes.
1.) Day IDK how many of me adoring Max and El. Should I support El spying on the boys? No. Do I support it anyway? Yes. I support girl’s rights and girl’s wrongs.
2.) Oh wait, I support the girls because the boys are sexist.
3.) Oh suddenly now Hopper knows how to apologize after barging into El’s room while drunk? Like literally this could have been avoided if Hopper had just encouraged her to have a social life outside of Mike, because Mike being her whole world was actually bad.
4.) Oh, I forgot they chose to spy on Billy at random and El is seen by him. Also it was definitely happening simultaneously with him sacrificing someone, probably the coworker but it’s impossible to know for certain at this point because you don’t see the girl whimpering and the subtitles only say ‘girl whimpering’, not a name.
5.) It is very difficult to tell if Will is a player in a campaign and is forcing Mike to run one or if he’s dressed as Will the Wise as the DM for some reason, even though that doesn’t make sense.
6.) Does Jim Hopper not own anything other than his work uniform?????
7.) Jesus Christ, Hopper couldn’t look past his own jealousy to listen to Joyce for two seconds until she said ‘what if it’s them?’ Oh wait nvm, he’s still being a little bitch. And this makes no fucking sense because Hopper was always the person who listened her the first two seasons!
8.) I would have walked out in the middle of Hopper’s bullshit too, Joyce.
9.) Poor Max thinks El accidentally looked in Billy getting laid.
10.) Nancy dismissing Jonathan’s worries makes me mad. The Byers family all has Cassandra complexes or something.
11.) The shitheads working for the paper all definitely suck. Also, how is Nancy Drew an insult? She was a world traveling and beloved detective who always saved the day and had two best friends. And she had a boyfriend I never cared about. I wanted her with Frank Hardy.
12.) Dustin actually is shockingly right about what to look for in a date, but wrong about who Steve should date. Obviously Steve should date Eddie, who is off somewhere safe this season aka not existing.
13.) Okay Will does DM in season 3 for the first time. But Mike was the DM before that.
14.) Max and El are being Nancy Drews. <3 <3
15.) The only consistently good visual in Stranger Things is the Void that El finds people in.
16.) I just realized the entire group would benefit from a group chat or a Discord server. Would do them all a world of good to be able to be like ‘FYI looking into insane rats’ and others to be like ‘FYI there’s a missing cheerleader’ and for Will get to be like ‘FYI my friends are dicks and somehow this feels like the worst thing that has happened to me because I’m a child and losing friends actually is worse than going to a Hell dimension’
17.) Neither Steve nor Dustin know what an evil Russian looks like. Also Dustin doesn’t know how to fake a phone convo.
18.) The code gets translated episode 2 and cracked in episode 3. I swear every new season makes me realize how bad the Duffers are at pacing.
19.) Nancy really doesn’t wanna have a conversation about how this will get them fired. I love her and her big damn hero complex, I really do, but she’s gotta learn not everyone else is middle class enough to afford to do that.
20.) Oh finally Hopper has an adult conversation about his feelings. We needed more conversations like this.
21.) Will is the only person Mike readily apologizes to without being prompted. But also they totally forgot about hiw little spot in the woods.
22.)I forgot Will destroys Castle Byers. Oh this is actually really sad. Oh bud.
23.) There is clearly a light switch at the top of the stairs to the basement and no one uses it so is it broken or did they just ignore it for effect.
24.) Steve is such a pouty puppy in the rain. They are all absolutely soaked. ALSO ALREADY ROBIN AND STEVE HELD HANDS. BEST FRIENDSSSSSSS.
25.) Hopper got attacked by a Russian in the lab. Forgot about that. ANd by attacked I do mean got his ass kicked. Steve and Hopper have solidarity over being the protector and also occasionally getting the ass beatings of their lives.
26.) El just broke into Heather’s house. Also everyone was very stepford in there.
27.) Oh Billy got to see backstory of El looking bitchin’. Fun.
28.) WILL’S SPIDEY SENSES ARE TINGLING AGAIN.
29.) Well, I forgot they straight up drug the mom but knock the dad out with a wine bottle. I’m confused as to why they didn’t just drug both parents because both were drinking wine, but I guess they decided it was more dramatic? Anyway, I feel bad for Heather, not for Billy
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An example of "but realism!" I'm struggling to reign in for Megacross. Specifically "failing at everything must be really demoralizing for Toons" and "even if it doesn't hurt much being treated as cosmic punching bags has to suck."
Nick is not doing so hot mentally when he first shows up. He has PTSD. He's in a place where almost literally anything can happen at any time and nobody can properly explain why, or how they cope with the insanity. They constantly underreact to what he sees as horrific accidents and random acts of violence. Yeah the Toons come out the other side mostly fine but he flinches every time, and worse, he gets criticized for it, even by the one he's concerned for. He can't tell anyone how much he means "I'm from out of town" because the police are trying to keep the issue under wraps.
This is the Genre Car Crash moment. The first and, so far, biggest.
((Being a classical lit nerd he understands story structure but not Toon Tropes, so Eddie being like yeah, your hammerspace? Where you guys store all the rubber chickens and banana cream pies and wooden mallets? Gets a look from Nick like he's growing a second head.))
And because failure is inevitable for them, he keeps fucking it up. Accidentally destroying a vital piece of evidence, for example. Again, people are very callous to his confusion and frustration. Toons just can't do anything right. Can't depend on 'em. That's the way it is.
Eddie doesn't doubt Nick’s a nice guy, he wants to help, he's strong and kind-hearted. He begins questioning whether Nick was even a real detective in Fallout. Maybe he couldn’t hack it there either and lied about his track record. Nick regrets how quick he told Eddie about his memory problems and cracked jokes about loose screws, he mentioned he might space out when new fragments surface and explained the personality upload.
There is a lot of anxiety underpinning all this. He needs to appear charming, witty, capable, something, something to give him a foothold and win people over. Because if he doesn't prove his worth somehow, and loses the safety net of Eddie vouching for him, things could go downhill very quickly.
This isn't just to torture Nick and hammer a no fun / suspension of disbelief sign into the ground. All this stress has a purpose: Seriously posing the question whether it's a good idea for him to be working under these circumstances. Eddie thinks he should admit he's out of his depth and take time to just chill.
When Eddie Valiant has to stage an intervention and tell you this profession is not good for you, that's when you know you fucked up.
Where's the line? How badly would he have to mess things up for a client before he stepped back of his own accord? How does he take Eddie’s suggestion? What does he do with himself left to his own devices in a place that feels so familiar and alien at the same time?
Meanwhile Conrad swaps clothes and works on a horse ranch and doesn't talk much about himself to stay hidden. He's human, doing perfectly fine in the new setting. Until an incident pushes him to go to Nick, Nick has no recollection of him, and he wants nothing to do with Conrad after only about ten minutes together.
This is an almost immediate downturn for both of them.
To get to the spoilery stuff below, I feel like I have to really lean into the idea that this environment is almost tailor-made to gaslight Nick and get him at least halfway to becoming a nervous wreck. There is some hubris at play, some pride, but... Would just "being back in Pre-War" revert him so much to his old unhealthy coping mechanisms?
*********
Conrad is Nick’s worst fear, the last thing he needs right this moment, someone who has seen everything inside his head, every flash of anger, every moment of jealousy, all those pesky human flaws he has to overcome. After the Lounger Tour he hid in Nick’s mind as a ghost for months, trying to be as small and unobtrusive as possible. Not wanting to hurt Nick but terrifed of being found and deleted, ready to fight Nick for control if need be.
Dying once, finding out that yes, he just ceases to exist, waking up in the Lounger, baring his soul, having to steel himself to die again, then getting stuck... What else can happen to what remains of him? How many times will his consciousness be shuffled around? It was only a couple days the first time, but how long could he be shut off?
Nick became his entire world.
His beginning and his end.
The one thing he could cling to. Compare himself to.
Just before the world-jump, he was forced to reveal himself. He managed to convince Nick to hear him out- Only to wake up alive, in the desert, seemingly going centuries back in time.
Conrad is willing to go to bat for Nick, talking him up, corroborating his story. He not just accepts Nick as he is, he's fallen in love with the Synth. He's immediately ride or die, if it's me and you against this world, so be it. I'll tell people whatever you want me to.
Nick pushes him away. Understandably, he is still very- "Territorial" is a word I've used before, but in this instance that kinda implies he's being selfish. Very guarded. About who gets to crack open his skull and rummage around in there. Conrad had also felt the same at the start of the memory Lounger sequence. The first time he actually gets angry at Sole was her impatience, ignoring one of his monologs. If she wants to know his story that badly she's gonna sit down and listen to the entire thing.
But now? He'll submit to almost anything, any intrusion into his mind, if it proves his side of the story and earns Nick’s trust. He even begins to *crave* the sensation of being stripped bare, his grey matter flayed open.
Additionally while they agree on what Nick is like, a lot of stuff doesn't match up. Like who survived Vault 111. On top of all of that Conrad might have to tell people he was a merc and while he's totally willing to do it Nick does not want them knowing that or the fact Nick, in both stories, took the job prepared to help Sole kill him.
"But I deserved it."
And on top of all *that* Nick has to come out to Eddie if he hasn't already. I had considered him making it very clear to everyone who learns this story that Conrad being a guy was completely irrelevant, it's his obsession that's the issue, but.
The boiling point we are slowly inching towards is Nick will not ask for help even as he's being eaten alive.
Conrad is kicking himself for coming on so strong and leaves Nick alone to process everything. He had realized earlier how much of his thoughts were still consumed by Nick, even seperated, I think Billy probably figured it out without being directly told... I have no clue what Billy could really do here. The worst case of lovesick he's ever seen, between the three of them each have memory problems. Nick and Billy are both really famous but Nick insisted he knew Billy from more than just legends. Same as Conrad, the description of personalities matched, but not historical events.
These two are not going to end up together or date or anything. I am very sympathetic to Conrad but... Yeah, no.
In fact I want to push these two so hard they want to kill each other.
Conrad can never go back to the old world. He doesn't believe he'll get a choice if Nick finds whatever mysterious power is pulling people to Ground Zero and reverses it.
Nick cannot stand how intimately this stranger knows him. He cannot conceive of Conrad coming out the other side of that experience loving him. He cannot be convinced that he'll keep his mouth shut. Just this once, he wants to get rid of his problem the Wasteland way. Just this once. He said he remembers you already taking that path once, right?
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cd-head · 1 year
Note
It’s his first day of school.
Stacy holds his hand in hers tightly. She squeezes, overprotectiveness seeping from her skin and pores. Shawn’s nervous, not like he’s nervous when his mom’s gone, but almost there. Anxiety bubbles up in the back of his throat and makes him want to throw up.
He’s eight years old when he first goes to school. His parents hadn’t had enough money to send him until now, and he’s certainly behind his classmates. He doesn’t want people to think that he’s stupid, because he knows that he isn’t. He can read basic words, he can do basic math. He’s worked in Mike’s autoshop for months now!
He doesn’t think his best is good enough.
Stacy is dressed up in her best outfit - a chiffon and lace white dress that must be an heirloom because it’s much to nice looking to be originally from their parents. Ever since dropping out of high school, she’d been job hunting. She finally scored an interview this morning that she plans to go to after finishing dropping Shawn off at the elementary school. Eddie had offered, but Stacy refused to give in.
There’s another boy in the front of the school walking with a slightly taller boy. They must be related because Shawn can tell from this distance that they have at least the same nose. The taller one, the older one, bends down to the younger one’s level and says something before shaking his shoulder encouragingly. Shawn feels a pang of jealousy.
The two walk into the elementary school together. Shawn wonders, briefly, what school would be like if he went to the same school as Eddie. He assumes it would be a lot more chaotic, considering it was specifically catered to ‘problem children’.
Shawn doesn’t think that he’s prepared for school. His faded, taped up backpack threatens to fall off his shoulders as the stitches on the strap threaten to snap with every miniscule movement. Stacy doesn’t seem too concerned about her brother’s weariness because she continues pulling him.
As they near the entrance, Stacy drops his hand and looks down at him. “Remember, room 209. Don’t bite no one, don’t hit no one, don’t cause no trouble. Got it, Buster?” she speaks with a southern twang that reminds Shawn of their time living in Mississippi.
He nods. Stacy gives him a closed mouthed smile. “Have a good day. You gotta walk home alone, but ‘m sure you’ll do jus’ fine.” He nods again. Stacy ushers him towards the school doors before taking off in a confident stride.
Shawn takes a deep breath, opening the doors, and walking inside.
The hallways are crowded and loud. It almost feels like the homeless shelter back in Kentucky. It had been destroyed in a tornado, leaving more and more people homeless once again. That was when Virna was able to nab and hotwire the trailer, driving them all the way to Philly just last year.
A girl brushes against him. A boy nearly trips him. He clutches his backpack tighter, heart pounding in his ears, sending his already hyper mind into overdrive. He knows he comes off as cool and collected which is exactly what he was hoping to achieve, but on the inside he feels like the eyes on him are melting him.
He rushes towards his classroom, only glancing at the numbers above the door as he walks. 205, 206, 207…209! Shawn pushes open the door to find his fellow classmates already together and chattering in groups. Shawn shuffles towards the back of the room and sits down at a desk in the corner.
A bell rings. Shawn finds himself dissociating slightly, mind wandering into the space between his imagination and the thoughts he pushes deep down.
The teacher stands in front of the class, clapping her hands and drawing attention to herself. Shawn snaps back into reality. The teacher introduces herself as Mrs. Clark in a soft and gentle voice. He watches her movements carefully as she makes her way around the classroom.
“Let’s all introduce ourselves to the class! Look at the number on the back of your chairs. When I call that number, say your name and a fun fact about yourself!” Mrs. Clark smiles brightly, toothily. “We’ll start with number 1!”
The boy Shawn saw in front of the school earlier stands up and speaks.
“I’m Cory Matthews and I love ice cream!”
Shawn smiles fondly, though he isn’t entirely sure why. Cory meets his eyes as he sits back down and returns the same sort of smile. The class claps quietly for him, Mrs. Clark congratulating him on his confidence, before calling out for number two.
Shawn realizes that he’s number two.
Copying Cory’s movements, he stands. “I’m Shawn Hunter and I’ve lived in six different states! South Dakota, Kentucky, Mississippi, California, Virginia, and New Jersey all before here!” A chorus of ‘wow’s and ‘cool’s erupt throughout the classroom. Shawn smiles, proud of himself, and takes a seat.
Cory Matthews shoots him a thumbs up. Shawn Hunter shakes his head with a soft smile.
its rly good :D tje only thing id change is the ‘but on the inside he feels like the eyes on him are melting him.’ to ‘but truly? he feels all the eyes on him are melting him, even if he knows they arent’ to read a bit better
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commic-jester · 1 year
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It’s his first day of school.
Stacy holds his hand in hers tightly. She squeezes, overprotectiveness seeping from her skin and pores. Shawn’s nervous, not like he’s nervous when his mom’s gone, but almost there. Anxiety bubbles up in the back of his throat and makes him want to throw up.
He’s eight years old when he first goes to school. His parents hadn’t had enough money to send him until now, and he’s certainly behind his classmates. He doesn’t want people to think that he’s stupid, because he knows that he isn’t. He can read basic words, he can do basic math. He’s worked in Mike’s autoshop for months now!
He doesn’t think his best is good enough.
Stacy is dressed up in her best outfit - a chiffon and lace white dress that must be an heirloom because it’s much to nice looking to be originally from their parents. Ever since dropping out of high school, she’d been job hunting. She finally scored an interview this morning that she plans to go to after finishing dropping Shawn off at the elementary school. Eddie had offered, but Stacy refused to give in.
There’s another boy in the front of the school walking with a slightly taller boy. They must be related because Shawn can tell from this distance that they have at least the same nose. The taller one, the older one, bends down to the younger one’s level and says something before shaking his shoulder encouragingly. Shawn feels a pang of jealousy.
The two walk into the elementary school together. Shawn wonders, briefly, what school would be like if he went to the same school as Eddie. He assumes it would be a lot more chaotic, considering it was specifically catered to ‘problem children’.
Shawn doesn’t think that he’s prepared for school. His faded, taped up backpack threatens to fall off his shoulders as the stitches on the strap threaten to snap with every miniscule movement. Stacy doesn’t seem too concerned about her brother’s weariness because she continues pulling him.
As they near the entrance, Stacy drops his hand and looks down at him. “Remember, room 209. Don’t bite no one, don’t hit no one, don’t cause no trouble. Got it, Buster?” she speaks with a southern twang that reminds Shawn of their time living in Mississippi.
He nods. Stacy gives him a closed mouthed smile. “Have a good day. You gotta walk home alone, but ‘m sure you’ll do jus’ fine.” He nods again. Stacy ushers him towards the school doors before taking off in a confident stride.
Shawn takes a deep breath, opening the doors, and walking inside.
The hallways are crowded and loud. It almost feels like the homeless shelter back in Kentucky. It had been destroyed in a tornado, leaving more and more people homeless once again. That was when Virna was able to nab and hotwire the trailer, driving them all the way to Philly just last year.
A girl brushes against him. A boy nearly trips him. He clutches his backpack tighter, heart pounding in his ears, sending his already hyper mind into overdrive. He knows he comes off as cool and collected which is exactly what he was hoping to achieve, but on the inside he feels like the eyes on him are melting him.
He rushes towards his classroom, only glancing at the numbers above the door as he walks. 205, 206, 207…209! Shawn pushes open the door to find his fellow classmates already together and chattering in groups. Shawn shuffles towards the back of the room and sits down at a desk in the corner.
A bell rings. Shawn finds himself dissociating slightly, mind wandering into the space between his imagination and the thoughts he pushes deep down.
The teacher stands in front of the class, clapping her hands and drawing attention to herself. Shawn snaps back into reality. The teacher introduces herself as Mrs. Clark in a soft and gentle voice. He watches her movements carefully as she makes her way around the classroom.
“Let’s all introduce ourselves to the class! Look at the number on the back of your chairs. When I call that number, say your name and a fun fact about yourself!” Mrs. Clark smiles brightly, toothily. “We’ll start with number 1!”
The boy Shawn saw in front of the school earlier stands up and speaks.
“I’m Cory Matthews and I love ice cream!”
Shawn smiles fondly, though he isn’t entirely sure why. Cory meets his eyes as he sits back down and returns the same sort of smile. The class claps quietly for him, Mrs. Clark congratulating him on his confidence, before calling out for number two.
Shawn realizes that he’s number two.
Copying Cory’s movements, he stands. “I’m Shawn Hunter and I’ve lived in six different states! South Dakota, Kentucky, Mississippi, California, Virginia, and New Jersey all before here!” A chorus of ‘wow’s and ‘cool’s erupt throughout the classroom. Shawn smiles, proud of himself, and takes a seat.
Cory Matthews shoots him a thumbs up. Shawn Hunter shakes his head with a soft smile.
THIS IS SO <3333
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torensrus · 3 years
Text
I sat there, not touching anyone, as my brain squealed like a teenage girl and said:
"Look what I realized! Buck is tall, fair-haired, blue-eyed with an awesome body and has been compared to a golden retriever. Eddie is shorter than him, dark-haired, brown-eyed, also has an impressive physique, has a hard time talking about feelings and is older than Buck. Remind you of anyone?"
"Um..."
"Steve Rogers and Tony Stark! It's Steve Rogers and Tony Stark!"
"Holy crap!"
"Yes! Imagine if they existed in the same universe! Villain of the Week attacks LA, the Avengers kick his ass, and 118 helps with civilian safety. When the battle is over Tony notices Buck and starts flirting with him. And Buck flirts back. They arrange a date, but during it they realize there is no spark. Yes, they flirt, but they don't want to go any further. They end up becoming friends, but everyone is convinced they are dating. Steve is pining. Eddie is jealous. The Avengers and 118 facepalms, thinking that Tony and Buck don't realize that they are dating a copy of Steve and Eddie. And Tony and Buck discuss their unrequited love for their best friend and share ice cream."
And anyway, how am I supposed to develop this now? Especially when my brain reminded me that a lot of fics make Tony the biological or adoptive father of Peter. That's just the cherry on top of the cake!
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cyllaeth · 3 years
Text
getaway green
find it on ao3
“Yeah, yeah… Love ya too, man.”
Eddie abruptly stops before he enters the changing room. Heʼd recognise that voice everywhere because itʼs Buckʼs. But the words he overheard make him uneasy. Love ya too? To whom Buck might have said it? The most likely answer is to Eddie but he’s right here and he’s definitely not talking with his best friend. It’s not Chim either because Eddie saw him already in the station. So… Who else? Albert? No, that’s just ridiculous. Albert and Buck are friends—not as good as him and Buck, obviously—but why would they talk via phone when they probably saw each other this morning in Buck’s apartament? It doesn’t make sense. So… Who is it then?
Eddie feels like someone just twisted his guts. Has Buck met someone new? No, he would’ve told him about his new relationship, he’s sure of it. His best friend has told him about reconnecting with Taylor and doing the whole “friendship without benefits” thing, for god’s sake. He would at least mention that he met someone worth dating.
It’s not very helpful or reassuring, though. Eddie knows it sounds bad but he doesn’t want Buck to find someone to date. Unless it’s him Buck would be dating. He can’t stand the idea of Buck spending his free time with someone else, kissing someone else, loving someone else.
Eddie’s very much in love with his best friend. He’s tried to get over with him by dating Ana. And it was a fucking disaster because everytime he kissed her, he wished it was Buck instead. So… It’s safe to say he got it bad. And he has to keep it under control because he doesn’t want to blow up the best friendship he’s ever had. Telling Buck he’s in love with him is not even an option.
He tries to suppress his jealousy and finally goes to the changing room. Buck’s already in his work clothes and he’s scrolling through his instagram; there’s a wide smile on his face. When he hears Eddie coming in, he looks at him and his grin gets even bigger.
“You’re almost late, Diaz.” He teases and Eddie can’t help himself but smile too.
“Almost late makes a big difference.” Eddie emphasises, quickly changing his clothes. Buck only rolls his eyes. When they’re both ready, they go upstairs and greet their coworkers. The blonde goes to the coffeemaker and he pours two cups of coffee—one for him and one for Eddie—and he hands it over to his friend. They sit on the couch as usual; their arms and thighs pressed together as if there’s any free space left.
“Uh, I’ve got news.” Buck says and waits until everyone pays attention to him. “TK’s coming to LA this weekend.”
“Wait, wait, wait. Do you mean the TK with whom you stole the fire truck and who you were flirting with?” Chim asks curiously.
Eddie nearly chokes on his coffee.
Was Buck really flirting with that kid from Austin? Sure, he noticed that dumbass and dumbasser hit it off very quickly but it wasn’t something unusual—Buck was so sweet and easygoing, it was almost impossible to not like him.
“I wasn’t flirting with him! I just invited him to LA! And besides, he has a boyfriend. Who is coming with him, by the way.” Buck explains; he’s slightly embarrassed, Eddie can tell, because his cheeks are more pink than usual. Again, why would he feel embarrassed if he wasn’t flirting with TK?
Maybe he was flirting but he just doesn’t want to admit that? Whispers a very annoying voice in Eddie’s mind. He tries to silence it.
“That’s amazing! Is that captain Strand’s son? You should come by the station with them, I want to meet them.”
Bobby’s voice pulls him away from his thoughts.
“Sure, I was actually thinking… Maybe we can have a night out together? As a team?” Buck suggests. “TK says he can’t wait to meet all of you guys.”
“Fantastic idea. I’ll ask him if youʼre bluffing.” Chim quips. Eddie has a strong urge to strangle him.
And then it hits him. Buck was talking with TK earlier, in the changing room. It was definitely TK.
The jealousy is eating him alive. Sure, Strand may have a boyfriend but is it really that big obstacle? Women were flirting with him when he was still married to Shannon; they’ve pretended not to see his wedding ring and ask him out anyway.
Oh, shit. What if he will be the witness of Buck flirting with TK? He’s not sure he can handle that. How will he react? What if he will finally blow up and say something he’s not meant to? He shouldn’t tempt fate and just stay at home instead of going out with the 118 and TK. He decides to gently decline the offer and thinks about a good excuse—he could easily use Christopher as a reason to not go with the team—and Buck would totally understand it.
When he finally opens his mouth to say something, the bell rings. Of course.
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
The whole friendship thing between Buck and TK is bothering him so much, he can’t even fully focus on the job. He’s so distracted that Bobby asks him if he’s okay. He shrugs his shoulders and lies that he’s completely fine. What would he say anyway? That he’s in love with his best friend who doesn’t love him back and he’s probably into another, very cute firefighter? No, this is already pathetic as it is. No need to embarrass himself more. When they’re back at the station, he’s almost on the edge. He needs to find out more, even if it causes him more pain.
He quietly follows Buck to the kitchen and when they crash on the couch, he musters up courage to ask him about his relationship with TK.
“I didn’t know you and TK were such close friends.” He says, trying to sound playful, teasing.
Buck sighs heavily.
“Oh, come on, man, you too?” He groans and shoots Eddie kind of an annoyed look. “Yes, we’re close and it’s nice to have a friend outside of the 118. And we’re just friends. No flirting, no hook ups. Besides, I’ve mentioned he has a boyfriend who will be there with us.”
Eddie believes him; he hears honesty in his voice and it makes him a little bit calmer. He feels like he can finally breathe again and—
“I wouldn’t flirt with him anyway even if he was single because I think I might be in love with someone else.”
Eddie swears he can hear his heart shattering on a million pieces. He wasnʼt prepared to hear this, he wasnʼt expected to have a breakdown in the middle of a shift. Buckʼs in love and he didnʼt know about this. How? Who is it?
“What?” Is the only thing he manages to whisper.
“I’m in love with someone.” Buck repeats. It’s very quiet, unsure, almost fragile. Like he’s afraid of Eddie’s reaction, afraid of being open and vulnerable. Afraid of being in love.
It breaks Eddie’s heart even more because the only thing that’s worse than his broken heart, it’s Evan Buckley’s broken heart.
“Oh. Are you... Does this person know about it?” He asks gently, moving a little closer to his best friend. He feels like heʼs been hit by a truck but right now he wants to at least reassure Buck itʼs okay, make him feel better. Thatʼs what friends do anyway. He can have a full breakdown in his own house when heʼll be alone. He starts to pat his back lightly and after a while, he can feel Buck relaxes a bit.
“No...  It’s… Complicated. It’s probably best if I don’t say anything. At least nothing will be destroyed. I canʼt destroy it.” He hears Buck’s muttering. He understands him perfectly; sometimes not telling the truth is just the best option.
Eddie still feels jealousy, he envies the nameless person who Buck loves. He’s trying to shove down his feelings and only focus on his friend to cheer him up.
“You wanna come home with me after the shift? We could make pizza together and watch some movies with Chris.” He proposes. He realizes he said coming home—like it was their home. Not only his and Chris’ but Buck’s too. And it is his home; Buck belongs to the Diaz family anyway.
His invitation instantly lightens up Buck’s mood because he finally looks at him and there’s a small smile dancing on his lips.
“Deal. But only if you stay away from the kitchen, we don’t wanna call 911 to the firefighter’s house. You can wash the dishes.”
“Fine. Whatever you wish.”
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
The rest of the week passes fairly peacefully. They don’t talk again about Buck’s feelings and Eddie successfully pretends he’s not jealous. They joke and bicker as always so it’s fine, it seems like everythingʼs perfect.
It’s Friday—and it means TK and Carlos are coming. Buck has a day off and he’s picking them up from the airport and giving them a quick LA tour. Eddie’s working and so are Hen, Chim and Bobby. It’s a busy shift so they’re definitely not bored; Buck keeps them entertained between the calls—he’s blowing up Eddie’s phone with texts and photos.
Eddieʼs happy that his friend is enjoying his day off, he really is. Of all people in the world, Buckʼs the one who deserves it the most. He wishes heʼd be there with him.
» from Buck: dude, we totally need to take Chris to this museum of space, heʼll be thrilled«
Eddie opens another photo from his friend—this time itʼs Buckʼs selfie whoʼs standing in front of the museum and smiling. It melts Eddieʼs heart because Buck always thinks about Christopher, always includes him in his plans. Despite what Hen says, heʼs aware that theyʼre basically co-parenting Chris; he canʼt pinpoint the exact moment when Buck has become a second dad, it just... Happened.
» to Buck: iʼm in. so museum and sleepover at my house next saturday? i think i need to get my revenge after last time«
Buckʼs response is immediate.
»from Buck: you can keep dreaming, Diaz«
Eddie stifles a laugh when he reads the message. At least, heʼs the one Buck chooses to share even small things with. And at this moment, everything is alright.
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
They finally meet at the 118ʼs favourite pub. Eddie went home after the shift to drop Chris at Abuela and change into something nicer. He tried once to say heʼs not going out with them but he quickly changed his mind when he saw the disappointment in Buckʼs eyes. Heʼs quite nervous, though. Despite what his friend said about flirting with TK, the doubt, the uncertainty is still there. He hopes he wonʼt do something stupid. Heʼs the last one to arrive and Buck spots him the second he crosses the threshold. When he reaches the booth theyʼre sitting at, Buck almost jumps out to pull him into a hug.
“Thanks for coming.” He whispers into his ear and Eddie shivers involuntarily.
Then, heʼs crushed by another hug—this time itʼs TK which is a little surprising but Eddie returns the hug. Carlos sticks to the traditional handshake.
“Nice to finally meet the famous Eddie Diaz.” He says fondly. “Weʼve heard about you quite a lot.”
Itʼs quite dark here but Eddie notices Buck blushing anyway. Itʼs cute, he thinks.
“I hope Buck hasnʼt told any embarrassing stories.” He quips.
“Your embarrassing stories are safe with me.” Buck says very seriously, placing his hand on his chest.
“Trusting Buckley with your secrets? Youʼre either brave or stupid. Or both.” Chim laughs, sipping his drink.
“Iʼm telling Maddie. She will kick you off the couch for at least a few nights.” Buck warns him. It piques Carlosʼ interest because he asks a question, looking at the other man.
“Wait, so Chimʼs with your sister? Wow, you guys are really close.”
“Oh, you have no idea.”
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
The conversations go as smoothly as the drinks they keep ordering. Eddie feels buzzed and content. Heʼs talking with Carlos about their childhood in Texas. He discovers that they have much in common; itʼs a very pleasant surprise and he feels like they will be very good friends. Bobby already called the night off, saying he needs to go back to his wife—because you canʼt say no to Athena —but Hen and Chim are still there and theyʼre singing karaoke alongside Buck and TK.
Eddie keeps an eye on these two; there was a reason why Judd called them dumbass and dumbasser. Buckʼs also slightly more drunk than him so someone really should check out what heʼs doing. And that is Eddieʼs responsibility. There is definitely no hidden meaning, no other reason to glance from time to time (fine, very often) at the scene.
Itʼs their turn to sing—itʼs Ed Sheeranʼs Give Me Love —and Eddieʼs confident it was Buckʼs choice. He notices how synchronised they are, how they keep sharing casual touches, how they laugh at each other, how they look at each other during the song—
And the jealousy almost throttles him. Because this is something Buck had only with him. Heʼs never been so touchy with Chim or Albert; sure, they have hugged many times but itʼs different with Eddie. Their closeness, lack of personal space was there from the first Eddieʼs day at 118 even when theyʼve been showing off to each other. Itʼs never felt awkward or inappropriate. It was easy, natural, kind of like breathing—something that people do without even thinking about it because itʼs just part of life. Because it was Buck.
Heʼs spiraling. He needs to go outside, somewhere where he wonʼt see Buck and TK together. It doesnʼt even help him that TKʼs boyfriend is right there next to him and he doesnʼt feel annoyed, threatened. He watches them with amusement in his eyes.
“I... I need to go to the bathroom.” Eddie says quietly and he rushes out of the booth before Carlos can say something. In the middle of the road to the bathroom, he changes his mind and goes out of the pub. He needs to take a deep breath, calm down and donʼt let jealousy take over him. Itʼs not like Buckʼs his boyfriend; heʼs allowed to be close with anyone he wants to. He knows that this possessive feelings and fear of being replaced, hurt is probably irrational but it still gets to his head very easily.
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
He goes back inside after a while. He orders a beer and sits in the empty booth because apparently Carlos decided to join the rest on the stage. Eddieʼs grateful for that because he doesnʼt have to explain himself, he just can sip his beer in peace.
He doesnʼt notice TK coming to the booth, heʼs too lost in thoughts.
“What are you doing here all alone? Playing a dark, brooding hero?” He hears a very amused voice when TK sits across from him.
Eddie glares at him.
“Iʼm not brooding.” He scoffs. Heʼs definitely not brooding, heʼs just... Thinking. Trying to behave as usual. It would be rude of him to just go home without saying goodbye, right? And Buck would definitely call him to check if everythingʼs alright. Itʼs better to wait a little even if heʼs sitting alone.
“If you say so.” TK shrugs but then, he continues. “You know, thereʼs no need to look at me like you want to rip my head off.”
Eddie opens mouth to say something, to deny it because heʼs sure he didnʼt look at Strand like that but TK doesnʼt let him.
“Dude, donʼt. If looks could kill, I would be already dead when we met in Texas. Well, maybe it wasnʼt that intense back then but tonight you look like you want to strangle me. Thereʼs no reason. I like Buck but heʼs my friend. Just a friend.”
Eddie looks at him like a deer caught in the spotlight. Is he really that easy to read? He feels the blush creeping up in his cheeks; heʼs a little embarrassed because he really didnʼt expect TK to be so perceptive.
“I... How did you know?” He asks, his voice filled with uncertainty. He doesnʼt try to deny it anymore, TK wouldnʼt buy this bullshit anyway.
“Besides that I-wanna-kill-you look? ” TK laughs and then, he takes the water left on the table. “You look at him like the sun shines out of his ass. You were so focused on him that you barely noticed everyone else tonight. If I asked Hen or Chim about it, Iʼm sure they would say this is your normal behaviour. And you kept touching him like...” He trails off for a while, biting his lip. “You know... When I saw you and Buck for the first time, I was sure you two were together.”
Eddieʼs speechless; he’s mindlessly tapping his leg, looking at TK but not really seeing him. He’s silent for a few moments, but TK’s patient, he doesn’t rush him to talk.
“It’s… Complicated.” Eddie sighs heavily. He hasn’t told anyone about it but he doesn’t know if he can keep all of these emotions bottled up any longer. Maybe the fact he’s not entirely sober helps. And the fact it’s TK he’s talking to. “We’re friends. Best friends even. I… You know, he’s been there for me and he’s got my back since the day I arrived at the station. He’s the best friend I’ve ever had and I wasn’t expecting to fall in love with him. I don’t know how and when it happened but it just… Did? The thing is… I was panicking at first, I even tried to get over him by dating Ana. She’s—she was Christopher’s teacher. She was nice and sweet but I’ve kept thinking about Buck even when I was on a date with her. Even when I was kissing her, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. It’s embarrassing, I know.”
He’s thankful that TK’s not interrupting him, that he actually pays attention to him. He notices the resemblance between him and Buck. Both of them have a personality of a golden retriever and they tend to do sometimes very stupid and reckless things. But after all, they’re so easygoing and sweet, it’s very easy to love them. Eventually, he goes on with his confession. “You know, I was jealous when I saw you two because you’re awfully… Handsy. You can understand each other without even talking. I know you have Carlos and that you two are serious but… I can’t help it, it’s stronger than me. And I can’t tell him I’m in love, I can’t destroy our relationship. I can’t do it because Chris would lose him too and he’s already lost one parent. Besides, Buck’s in love with someone anyway.”
He ends his monologue and hides his face in his hands. He definitely feels better after saying it out loud but it’s still a little bit awkward.
“And here I’ve thought Judd calls you Hollywood because of the looks but now I’m sure it’s because of how dumb you are.” TK says boldly.
Eddie raises his head to gaze upon his friend. There’s a very amused grin on his face and he looks like he’s refraining himself from laughing out loud.
“You really have no clue, don’t you?” TK asks. “Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh at you but it’s so funny how oblivious and blind two people can be.”
Eddie scowls.
“Are you gonna keep mocking me or you’re gonna tell me what you mean?”
“Fine.” TK chuckles. “Have you ever considered that Buck might be in love with you? I know that he told you, not directly, but he told you about it. I guess you didn’t figure it out.”
“He didn’t—” Eddie protests without hesitation but he stops when recalls their conversation after Buck told the team about TK and Carlos coming to LA. He mentioned being in love with someone and not wanting to tell the person about his feelings but Eddie didn’t even think that he could be talking about him. “You sure… He was talking about me?”
He looks at TK with hope; he desperately wants it to be true.
“I’m sure.” The younger man reassures. “He’s in love with you as much as you are. Oh, speaking of the devil.” He mutters, seeing Buck going in their direction.
Eddie rapidly turns his head only to see his best friend settling down next to him. His face is slightly flushed, hair disheveled and there’s a wide smile on his lips.
“Dude, I know you’re into Texans but I think one of them is enough, don’t you think?” He asks TK playfully.
“Don’t worry, Eddie’s all yours.” TK replies, smiling mischievously and he winks at Eddie. “I’m sure Eddie’s more into cute, blue-eyed blondes anyway.”
And then, he flees out of the booth, leaving them both alone. Buck raises one eyebrow, looking suspiciously at his best friend.
“Blue-eyed blondes, huh?” He asks very intelligently. Eddie’s sure his cheeks and neck are red by now and it’s very noticeable.
“Y-Yeah. He’s right.”
“Interesting. Neither Shannon nor Ana were blondes.” Buck points out, his voice very teasing.
“But you are.”
It makes Buck blushing furiously and Eddie thinks it’s the cutest thing he saw this evening. Suddenly, he notices how close they are, how their bodies are pressed together, how blue Buck’s eyes are and how soft his lips are.
“So… You’re into blondes now?” Buck whispers, not tearing his gaze away from him, even for a second.
“Been into for a while now.”
“It’d make everything easier if I knew about this, I’d definitely do this sooner.”
Buck makes the first move and he closes the space between them. He gently brushes his lips like he doesn’t want to overwhelm him. But Eddie doesn’t want to back off. He’s the one who deepens the kiss, he’s the one who slides his tongue into his mouth, causing him to quietly moan.
“Do you think we could sneak off and go to my house maybe?” Eddie asks when they break apart, panting heavily.
“Dude, TK and Carlos are staying at my apartment, I can’t just sneak off.” Buck laughs. “I need to at least give them the keys if I’m not supposed to go back to my place tonight.”
“Then what are you waiting for? Just give them the keys and we can go.” Eddie pouts and he sounds so needy, it makes Buck giggle.
At some point, they get up and approach their friends who’re standing by the bar and ordering new drinks.
“Look who decided to join us!” Hen chuckles and she wants to say something else but she’s cut off by the Chim’s laughing loudly.
“I’m not sure if they are joining or leaving us.” TK smirks and Carlos nudges him softly to not to meddle.
“Actually, we were thinking about leaving if you don’t mind. I can give you the keys to my apartment.” Buck offers sheepishly.
“Just give us the keys, we’ll manage. You can go with your Texan.” TK says but then he adds, pointing a finger in Eddie’s direction. “But I need to meet Christopher before I go back to Austin.”
“I think we can arrange something. Tomorrow afternoon maybe?” Eddie suggests.
“Then we’re all set. Now, stop talking and get a room already!”
When Buck finally gives TK his keys, they say their goodbyes and order an Uber to Eddie’s house.
The ride is quick but quiet. They don’t really talk but the silence between them is not uncomfortable—it’s the opposite of it. They have to talk about their feelings eventually but they know they’ll have the time to do it. They enter the house and the second Buck closes the door, he’s slammed against the nearest wall. Suddenly, they’re kissing again; Eddie pushes his hips forward and it causes Buck to spread out his legs a little bit.
Eddie’s so glad Chris is at Abuela’s house because it means they have the whole night only for themselves—and they can do whatever they want to.
“Bed.” Buck growls when Eddie bites his lip and starts to unbuckle his belt.
“Someone’s impatient.” The older man teases.
“Said the guy who dragged me out of the meeting with our friends to have sex with me.” The blonde replies wryly.
“Just shut up, Buck.”
“Make me.”
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
Eddie slowly wakes up when the sun peeks through the curtains and shines on his face. His head hurts a little—well, heʼs not in his twenties anymore and he wasnʼt counting his beers last night—and he feels the weight on his chest. He needs a second to register that itʼs Buck; he sleeps very peacefully, completely nestled to Eddie. His headʼs on the place where Eddieʼs heart is, one arm around his waist; thereʼs a gingerish stubble on his cheeks and his blonde curls are perfectly messy. Itʼs a wonderful sight—and he wants to wake up like this every morning... Maybe minus a hangover.
He doesnʼt even notice how long heʼs staring at Buck like that but he doesnʼt really care. Eventually, Buck wakes up too and he raises his head a little. He seems a little confused but the expression disappears when he notices heʼs on top of Eddie and the manʼs grinning.
“Hello, sunshine.” Eddie says and he shifts a little to be able to pull his friend closer to properly kiss him. Itʼs kinda gross because they smell like yesterdayʼs beers and they havenʼt brushed their teeth but neither of them care.
“I assume you do remember last night... No regrets?” Buck asks. His tone is cheery, playful as always but Eddie can see the uncertainty in his eyes.
“Only one. That I was a coward for so long because we could have had it all much sooner.” He answers very seriously, looking directly into Buckʼs eyes. He wants him to believe in every word he says. “I know we hadnʼt exactly talked last night... But I donʼt want this to be a one night stand. Not with you. I want... More. Everything. I mean weʼve already been a couple for quite some time. You practically live in my house, youʼre Chrisʼ second dad and youʼve been my rock since the day weʼve met. We just... Havenʼt done the sexy part of the relationship.”
“Until last night.” Buck points out.
“Yeah... Point taken. So if you want to take it slow, we can take it slow. We can date like people usually do or you can already move in and take my closet, my bed and everything because youʼve already taken my heart.”
“If you think that your offer to move in is getting you out of asking me on a date then you’re terribly wrong, Diaz.” Buck teases and winks at his friend. “You need to romance me a little.”
“God, youʼre such a dork.” Eddie says fondly. He feels so damn happy and content because he can really have everything he wanted.
“You love it.”
“I do. Now, get your ass up. We need to pick up Chris from Abuela at some point. We have dinner with TK and Carlos later.” Eddie sighs because heʼd rather stay all day in bed with Buck—and maybe tell him some of the fantasies he had in his head—but the reality calls anyway.
“Are you sure you want me to pick up Chris with you? I mean, we donʼt have to do it together, I can go to my apartment and—”
“Buck. Iʼm sure. Itʼs not like we havenʼt done this before. I want to tell him about us too. I donʼt want to lie to him because I did it when I dated Ana and it didnʼt end well. Besides, heʼll be thrilled to see us together. Hell, he wants us together. He literally told me last week that I need to buy glasses if I canʼt see that you love me too.”
Buck looks at him with amusement and he laughs heartily.
“Heʼs a smart kid. And he definitely didnʼt get it from his father.”
Eddie scoffs.
“Youʼre really lucky that I love you that much because otherwise you wouldnʼt get away with saying stuff like this.”
Buckʼs smile is almost blinding.
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
They get up, eventually. They go to the shower together to “save the time and water” but it turns into another long making out session. They eat breakfast (made by Buck) and they finally go to Abuela to get Christopher.
“Edmundo, youʼre late.” They hear in the second Abuela opens the door. Sheʼs a little surprised to see not only his grandson but also his best friend.
She notices the big ass hickey on Buckʼs collarbone thatʼs exposed because heʼs wearing Eddieʼs Henley and raises her eyebrow.
“Now I understand why youʼre late.” She smirks which causes them to blush. “Anyway, itʼs nice to see you again, Evanito. I hope I get to see you more often.” She adds and then embraces both of them in a hug.
“You will, Abuela, I promise.” Eddie says honestly. He wants to add something but he hears an excited voice from the hallway.
“Dad!” Christopher shouts as he goes to the door to greet Eddie. “Bucky?” He asks when he notices the other man standing next to his dad.
“Hey, Superman!” Buck says, kneeling down to hug the kid.
“I didnʼt know youʼll be there. Are you coming home with us?”
“Yeah, buddy, Iʼm coming with you.”
Christopherʼs smile only gets bigger.
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
“Chris? What would you say if Buck were living with us?” Eddie asks when theyʼre at home. Buckʼs making Abuelaʼs famous enchiladas with Christopher (none of the Diaz siblings have gotten the recipe despite asking for it a countless times; Buck asked once and Abuela happily gave it to him) and Eddieʼs only an observer. He loves watching those two interacting, spending time together. He loves how easily Buck has stepped into a co-parent role, how fast and hard he has fallen in love with Chris, how good he is with kids in general. Heʼs amazed by it almost every time he sees them together. He wouldnʼt have found someone better to be with.
“Buckyʼs moving with us? Iʼve thought it wouldnʼt happen!” Chris replies. The corners of his lips are curling into a smile but before it breaks into a full grin, he asks. “But does that mean you are dating and we wonʼt see miss Flores or someone else anymore?”
Buck looks at Eddie with a mischievous smile and mouths told you, heʼs a smart kid.
“Yeah, kiddo, no more miss Flores or any other women. Itʼs gonna be only the three of us.”
It seems to be a very satisfying answer for Christopher—he just nods and goes back to adding all ingredients to the enchilada sauce.
When everything’s almost ready, Christopher goes to his room to change his shirt because he spilled the sauce on it and they are left alone. Eddie doesnʼt waste any time and comes closer to be able to kiss Buck. He thinks it may be a problem to keep his hands off his best friend but they will figure it out too. Eventually.
“I think I can get used to this.” Buck says when they stop to take a breath.
“To what? Cooking with Chris?” Eddie teases.
Buck only huffs but then he smiles anyway because cooking with Christopher is definitely on top of his favourite things to do. “Yep, definitely. He is my favourite Diaz after all.”
“Then Iʼm in second place I guess?”
“You wish. Thereʼs also Abuela and Tia Pepa... Maybe even your sisters.” Buck grins. “You have very strong competition.”
“I think I may have some tricks up my sleeve to change your mind then.” Eddie states and heʼs ready to show them to Buck but the doorbell rings. He sighs heavily. “Guess you just have to wait to see them then.”
“Canʼt wait.”
“Hi Buck. Fancy seeing you here.” TK says with a very wide smile on his lips. “Iʼm guessing last night went well then.”
“Well... Yeah? Thanks to someone who was meddling just a little bit.”
Carlos rolls his eyes but he doesnʼt look even slightly irritated.
“Please, donʼt boost his already big ego, he was talking last night about changing his career to be a matchmaker.”
“Matchmaker?” Buck raises his brow. “Sounds interesting.”
“Carlos, we should really keep our boyfriends apart, itʼs dangerous to let them use their brain cells together. If they even have them.” They hear Eddieʼs amused voice and he appears right behind Buck. The blonde blushes at the word boyfriends. “But come on in, weʼre all ready.”
“We brought a six pack and a gift for Christopher.” Carlos adds, lifting up the beers.
“Oh, Chris will be thrilled. Heʼs already so excited to meet you two.”
“Weʼre excited to meet him too, Buck has told us so many things about Christopher, I feel like I already know him.” TK explains when they go inside.
“Bucky was talking about me?” Christopher peeks in the kitchen shyly. He sounds quite surprised.
“Yes, he did. And itʼs very nice to finally meet you. Buck couldnʼt stop talking about you. He didnʼt even talk so much about your dad I think.”
“Because my dad is very boring sometimes and heʼs all grumpy.” Christopher shrugs, looking apologetically at his dad. “Sorry dad but thatʼs the truth.”
“When did you become so sassy, huh? But I guess youʼre right. But... This is TK and this is Carlos.” Eddie introduces his friend to his son.
“And we know youʼre very interested in space so we got you a little gift.” Carlos adds, handing Chris over a package.
“Thank you.” Christopher says simply and puts it on the floor to unpack. “Whatʼs this?” He asks curiously.
“Oh, let me help you unpack it but maybe not here? We don't want to make a mess now.” Carlos proposes and Chris immediately agrees.
They go to the living room together and Buck sees with how much fondness TK looks at them.
“Carlos seems pretty good with kids.”
“He is. Heʼs fantastic. Maybe one day weʼll think about it.” TK replies thoughtfully.
“Oh, really? You two would be amazing dads.” Eddie says honestly, putting up the plates on the table. TK looks a little stunned.
“Never really thought about it too much earlier. But, anyway, howʼs my favourite couple? Because you two are a couple now, right?” TK eyes both of them carefully.
“Buckʼs moving in. Donʼt know when yet but Iʼm planning to make it as soon as we can.” Eddie announces proudly.
“Wow you really donʼt waste your time. So should we expect an invitation for the wedding next year?” TK laughs.
“... Maybe?” They both reply in sync.
“Well, weʼre doing it backwards. We started by raising Christopher together instead of just simply dating each other. So maybe we should marry each other soon. Iʼd marry him even now.” Buck states and winks at his boyfriend.
“Something tells me that the 118 would be mad at us for weeks. If they wouldnʼt kill us first for not inviting them to the wedding.” Eddie points out.
“I hate that youʼre right. They would totally kill us. But dinnerʼs ready and boys are probably starving so letʼs feed them first.”
The dinner is excellent, the conversation goes smoothly and Chris talks about his gift—an International Space Station Lego set—with so much excitement, they donʼt even dare to interrupt him. Buck and TK even offer to help him build it later. They eat a dessert and then, Eddie and Carlos settle on the couch, beers in hands and Buck and TK sit on the floor alongside Christopher and they discuss how to build the space station. Eddie canʼt tear away his gaze from Buck who looks so happy and excited to play with his—their —son and agrees to everything Christopher says.
“You two really fit together.” Carlos says quietly because he doesnʼt want to distract boys from work. “And Iʼm glad you were able to finally talk about your feelings. I must admit, I was pretty invested in your story when TK was talking about it. I really hoped you two would figure it out somehow.”
“Can you believe I was really jealous yesterday? I was sure Buck and TK were flirting and.. God, I was so mad at you for a second why you donʼt even react, why are you so cool about it. And... Yeah, I was stupid because I was sure he was into TK.” Eddie sighs because heʼs still embarrassed about it, he still canʼt believe he was so anxious that Buck might be in love with someone else.
“Oh, you probably havenʼt seen the way he looks at you. Itʼs really something. And TK was really invested in—and I quote—bringing these two lovesick idiots together. They were never flirting. Not seriously at least.”
“Yeah, I know... I... I really hope heʼll be happy with me. But Iʼve heard your relationship is getting more serious.”
“Yeah, well... We live together now so itʼs a pretty big step for both of us. We havenʼt killed each other so Iʼm taking it as a good sign. I donʼt know whatʼs next. Maybe a wedding but I need to be sure TK will say yes and wonʼt freak out about it.” Carlos sighs, knowing that TK may be still cautious about the whole wedding thing but he definitely wants to try it anyway.
“He mentioned earlier something about you two having a kid so I think heʼs taking it very seriously too.” Eddie reassures him.
They both look at his boyfriends who are completely focused on building a space station with Christopher and itʼs very heart-warming sight. “I donʼt think he would say something like that if he didnʼt mean it. Besides, heʼs a lot like Buck and I bet he loves kids as much as him. And I need to add that Christopher is not really a kid who trusts easily but he clearly has so much fun with TK. I wouldnʼt worry too much if I were you. You two really fit together too.”
“Yeah, we do. TK was annoyingly stubborn at first and he didnʼt want to admit that itʼs more than just a hookup. Now weʼre living together.” Carlos laughs, looking softly at TK who sticked out the tip of his tongue and visibly tries to concentrate. “I must say, this is a really nice trip. Glad I could meet TKʼs friends and just... Let myself relax a little bit. Something tells me ifʼs not our last visit in LA, though.”
“I bet.” Eddie hums in agreement. “You can visit LA as many times as you want to. We will probably visit you in Texas too. I have to properly introduce Buck to my family one day so we can definitely do a quick trip to Austin then.”
“Weʼll be happy to see you. Captain S—Owen—will be thrilled to see you. He was disappointed he couldnʼt go with us, he wanted to see Hen again and meet your captain.”
“Yeah, he was whining all the time since we told him weʼre going to LA.” TK adds suddenly. Heʼs still focused on building the space station but Carlos and Eddie stopped talking quietly and now he hears what theyʼre saying. “Mateo was disappointed too, he wanted to visit his cousin. Marvin? Or something like that.”
“We can organise something bigger so everyone can be there.” Buck agrees. “Eds, we should definitely tell Bobby about it. I donʼt care if itʼs here or in Austin, I can definitely organise it.”
“I have no doubts.” Eddie says fondly and then looks at their guests. “You shouldʼve seen him when he organised a Christmas party for us all with help from Athena. We were all working and our kids were so disappointed by it but Buck basically rescued everything. That was really amazing.”
“Really? You didnʼt even mention that!” TK scoffs. “But nice to know, maybe Iʼll hire you to organise my wedding with Carlos since youʼre so good at this stuff.”
“Oh, I donʼt know. Maybe Iʼd work with Carlos because heʼs so sweet and nice but you? I bet youʼll be a bridezilla.”
TK only throws at Buck a piece of Lego in response, followed by the laugh of both Eddie and Carlos.
━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━
Itʼs almost 10pm when TK and Carlos decide to go back to Buckʼs apartment. Christopher already fell asleep but he managed to build the space station with Buck and TK and he was really proud of it, just like both of his helpers.
“Dude, your kid is really amazing. I mean, I donʼt remember the last time when I had so much fun—sorry, babe—and Iʼm really gonna miss him.” TK admits and thereʼs so much honesty in his voice, nobody even questions it.
“Heʼs gonna miss you too, if it helps.” Eddie tells him, grinning softly. “Both of you. But youʼre gonna see him soon. At least I think so.”
“I take your word for it.” TK warns him.
“Well, you can always face time with us.”
TKʼs face instantly lights up and he hugs Eddie.
“I will miss you too, Hollywood.”
Eddie only rolls his eyes.
“Hey, you two big saps, you will see each other tomorrow because weʼre gonna drive you to the airport before our shift.” Buck announces.
“Fineeee.” TK sighs dramatically. “But I think our Uberʼs here so weʼre gonna leave you alone. It was really nice to spend more time with you.”
“Likewise.”
They say their goodbyes eventually and when TK and Carlos are already in the car, Buck takes Eddieʼs hand and smiles widely.
“It was really an eventful 24 hours.” He says.
“It was. Now we only have to prepare ourselves for tomorrowʼs shift. I bet Hen and Chim will be insufferable.”
Buck groans.
“Ugh, they will be. Maybe we should be insufferable too?”
“Buckley, do you have something particular in mind?” Eddie asks, watching his boyfriend carefully. Maybe other people wouldnʼt notice it but heʼs Eddie and he knows Buck too well. He notices that mischievous look in his eyes and heʼs sure Buckʼs up to something.
“I have a few ideas, Diaz.”
“Care to share them with me?”
“Always.”
143 notes · View notes
skinks · 4 years
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I had a REALLY intense beatles phase in my late teens and i had the hots for paul mccartney and one time i found this story where this woman said she met paul at a party in 65 and he took her home and they talked until the sun came up and then he got a call telling him to come to the studio and he started to say he had to leave and she was like "not before you fuck me" and he laughed and then he DID and he left her alone in his house after and she stole his underwear (1/2)
(which she kept for decades until her husband threw them into their muddy front yard one day in a fit of jealousy) and a teapot and it always made me absolutely FERAL with jealous horny rage and like?? just this incredulous feeling of How On Earth Did That Really Happen and anyway bill hader’s dumpster mattress one night stand story is my new version of that (2/2)
The fucking journey this just took me on, holy shit. Did she at least get to keep the teapot?
I love that you had an intense teenage horny phase for a Beatle, I had one for Bob Dylan and I remember watching one of his electric era tour documentaries and being HORRIBLY jealous of the 60s girls hanging around outside his hotel... anyway that’s besides the point
I UNDERSTAND!!!!! THE MATTRESS STORY HAUNTS ME.... Bhader knows what he’s doing, he can try to couch it in as much self-deprecating oh-I’m-just-an-awkward-nerd fronting as he likes but he KNOWS what he’s doing and that woman knew it too. You ever notice how it’s the most competent ones who don’t feel the need to loudly prove themselves by being anything other than humble?? What did he SAY in that club! “It was going well,” he says, what does that MEAN, BILL, what did he fuckjfdkjcnnfkcning do that convinced this woman to leave the club, go to her place, lift a bed onto a car, go to HIS place and move furniture when she was literally moving to a new city the next day all so sHE COULD FUCK HIMMMM HOW IS HIS GAME THAT GOOD I FEEL LIKE A CHARACTER IN AN EDGAR ALLEN POE STORY BEING SLOWLY DRIVEN MAD BY THIS UNANSWERED MYSTERY
Ok sorry, I’m back. This is making me want to read a fic where (before they get together) Eddie watches an old interview of Richie telling the mattress story and he’s a seething ball of jealousy too. Then Richie comes out, he and Eddie sort their shit and get together, and one day Eddie laughingly comments that he had no reason to be jealous after all since Richie was obviously making the story up.
Richie looks at him weirdly. “I didn’t make up—that story did actually happen, Eds, I only changed it so people thought I went home with a chick.”
They are lying in bed. Eddie’s eye starts twitching. “Pardon?”
“Yeah?” Richie stretches, draping his right arm over his own head to scratch his left ear. Eddie will not be distracted by his chest right now, what the fuck. Richie squints at the ceiling. “I think his name was... Marco, or something. At least, that’s the name he gave to quote unquote Chris.”
“Marco, okay. Huh.”
“I wanted to be Lance or something cool, but my friend said I inhabited Chris better, I dunno. I didn’t even tell him why I needed a fake name, he was just like, big into method.”
“Yeah, mhmm.” Eddie sits up, nodding. He can’t stop nodding. His head feels like a champagne cork fizzing at the top of his spine. “So you, you uh—you were such a fucking player in your plaid and your baggy jeans that, that, that were the only things you even owned back then, Rich—don’t try to deny, it I’ve seen the pictures—that you convinced some guy who was moving town the next fucking day—”
Richie’s eyebrows shoot upwards. It makes his eyes look rounder, more delighted. “Convinced? Eddie—”
Eddie can’t stop, twisting the sheets in his hands til his knuckles go white. “Yes, convinced, you convinced him to go pick up some dirty mattress right off the street with a complete stranger even though you always make such a big deal about how awkward and nervous and repressed you were, you still, you still—”
“I was probably on molly or something at the time, man.” Richie’s beaming up at him. He pokes Eddie in the arm. Eddie feels how tense the muscle is, and fights to relax. “I’m kidding, at worst it was just a little tipsy driving. A little Wacky Races. Just call me Dick Bastardly.” Richie grins at his own dumbass joke, poking Eddie some more. “And it wasn’t just the mattress by the way, it was the whole bed. That’s a key detail. Headboard and everything.”
“The headboard?!” Eddie tries not to yell, but it comes out louder than he means to anyway. More of a shriek, embarrassingly. He lurches around in place to glare at their own flat bar of wood behind them. He holds onto that thing! It supports him, even when Richie’s fucking him into the wall!
Betrayal is neverending today, apparently. Eddie turns his glare onto Richie, who is laughing. “Stop laughing!”
“Your face,” Richie gasps. He covers his own face, then changes tack and yanks Eddie down over him to cackle into his flaming-hot throat. “What’s the problem! You’re acting like this is the same fucking bed, oh my god, you think I haven’t at least changed my mattress since I lived like a—like a Beavis and Butthead parody in Westwood, fifteen years ago?”
Eddie squirms miserably. Not even Richie’s broad nakedness against his can salvage this, he’s well and truly destroyed their sweet afterglow with his stupid overreaction. Feels like being fifteen again, ruining clubhouse hangouts with his snappy sulking as soon as Richie mentioned some girl at school. “No! No, obviously fucking not, just. I dunno.”
He doesn’t really deserve the gentle tease in Richie’s voice. “What don’t you know?”
“I don’t know!”
And that’s the part he hates most.
“Okay, okay. I think I do. Jesus, you’re actually jealous,” Richie breathes. He bites his lip, the way he does when he’s so happy about something he’s making a real effort not to talk over it. He’s still a little sweaty and pink from their Friday night activities, bedraggled hair and no glasses. The expression always scrunches his left eye into a full squint, something Eddie finds so helplessly appealing he can’t imagine what it’s like to watch that interview and not feel jealous.
Eddie grunts, shrugs as best he can under Richie’s heavy hug. Fucking Marco.
Richie’s hand is firm on the back of his neck. There’s pressure from his thumb at one point of Eddie’s jaw, the soft part between ear and bone that has him gulping open for Richie’s low murmur, “Eddie baby, don’t be jealous.” Their mouths meet and Eddie sighs into the slick warmth of it, feeling grateful and abashed and idiotic all at once.
They separate with a little snick of spit. Richie lids his eyes open just a touch, looking drowsy with affection. Eddie lowers his forehead to Richie’s shoulder and speaks to his collarbone. “I just—I hate it when you act like people are just doing you a favor for, for liking your shit or fucking going home with you when clearly it was—you’re fucking hot, Rich, and, and sexy when you’re not trying to be, and you were hot back then too, but you still act like it was a miracle anyone wanted to even touch you when I—I always would’ve picked the stupid dirty bed up off the street too. For you. And I wouldn’t’ve moved town the day after. So.”
Richie doesn’t speak for a moment. There is a cloud above their shared, clean bed, implicit with shared memory of all the times they dirtied each other’s sheets with grass stains and grubby feet, chip crumbs and even tears, just once, just before Eddie really did move town and forgot all the things he cared about so much more than he ever cared about getting sick.
He would never leave again though, is his point. Richie always seems to know what he means before Eddie does. He tries to think it loud enough, brings his hand up blindly to Richie’s face and strokes back his hair, not because Richie is a mind reader, but because he knows what it means that Eddie has never wanted to touch someone else like this.
Eddie’s spine then, curving under Richie’s knuckles like brushing a shiver along a set of wind chimes. His hand lands on Eddie’s tailbone, an X marks the spot that still throbs with loosened heat and pleasure from his orgasm. Lying on your front is bad for your posture.
I’m not lying on my front, Eddie thinks, with a little of the vicious defiance he doles out to that cloying voice sometimes, the one that tries to ruin quiet moments with its fretting. I’m lying on Richie’s. He’s good for my posture. He’s gonna snap my spine back into place and this time I’ll let him touch me.
Richie presses their temples together, small-voiced. “I guess... I find most of the flattery shit hard to believe. I didn’t like myself or the stuff I was making, so I’d automatically assume they were lying, y’know? If I agree it implies I believe them, which makes me feel like some giant, arrogant dick—don’t say it.” He pats Eddie on the ass. “But, on the other hand, if I think I’m somehow important enough for people to lie to, that’s kind of an arrogant dick move too.”
Eddie pushes up to eyeball him. “Even with sex? That’s so fucking dumb.”
This second ass-pat is harder, more of a stinging smack. Richie’s guarded look coils into a grin again at Eddie’s bared-teeth hiss. “I never said it wasn’t.”
“Well, I mean, what do you think it meant that fucking Marco—” Richie snorts at the projectile venom burning acidic holes through Eddie’s voice, “—was clearly willing to catch fleas or goddamn tetanus just to fuck you? What about me? You think I’m pretending it’s good just to encourage your weird, unnecessary inferiority thing? ”
“No, you’re right,” Richie laughs. His snorts have bubbled into full-blown giggles now as he squints down at the mess between their stomachs. “That’s pretty hard evidence you’re providing there, Eds.”
Getting harder too, rubbed up against the soft crease of Richie’s hip. Eddie can feel the lingering red throb of heat on his ass, like closing his eyes and still catching the gold-coin flash of the sun branded on the inside of his eyelids. Richie digs his blunt nails into the stung tenderness of his skin and gently pulls Eddie’s asscheeks open. He feels Richie’s quickened breathing against his wet mouth, and wonders how to ask for another spank in a way that isn’t gonna make him want to enter witness protection afterwards.
“I can’t believe you were jealous, you’re the last guy in the world who needs to be jealous,” Richie moans. Eddie feels the vibration of it on his tongue, now sucking on the knot of Richie’s adam’s apple. “Wait, can you really get tetanus from abandoned street beds?”
“Ugh!” Eddie bites him there and pulls off slowly, sucking so the stubbled skin of Richie’s strong throat is released from his mouth’s suction with a wet pop. Richie’s hips flex against him. “I almost wish this was the same fucking bed just so I had something to throw out into the yard!”
“O-ooh, how telenovela of you, I like it.”
Oh Christ, Eddie has to put some kinda stop to this before Richie starts speaking Spanish. He needs to last. He needs to beat Marco. “I’ll throw you out with it,” he says, too breathy and honest for anywhere else but here. “Trashmouth. Sweetheart.”
Richie’s face is flushed, eyes dark and desperate. He grips at Eddie’s ribs so hard Eddie feels them bending. “Dumpster diver.”
Eddie rolls his hips down, plants his palms on either side of Richie, shoves them under the pillows. He braces his elbows hard into Richie’s shoulders and grinds their sweaty foreheads together, but whatever aggression there is within him is softened by his catapulting heartbeat, harmonising with his own laughter. With Richie’s, always.
“Nah, ‘fraid the only thing left to remember that half-night stand with Marco is, well.” Richie looks down between them again, eyes almost crossed. “It’s me. My dick, more specifically.”
Eddie can feel as much. Another wave of possessiveness froths through him, crackling in the pockets of his joints, feels like cartoon steam whistling out his ears. “It better not be half-standing because it remembers anything about fucking Marco,” he snarls.
Richie raises his hands in a down boy gesture. It shifts his arms and shoulders in the way that sometimes makes Eddie wish he were a door, just so Richie could ram him open, and so he pins Richie’s wrists to the bed instead.
“Please don’t throw my dick out into the yard, babe,” Richie says.
“Gonna give you something to remember this fucking bed by,” Eddie says, and slides down Richie’s body to do just that.
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Chapter 58 - The deal, the name and the prince (Part One)
In the previous chapter: Angie meets Jerry outside the diner after work. He tells her he wrote some new songs he's not sure about and he convinces her to go and listen to the demo in his car. There are three tracks: one is for Andy Wood, one is for his dad and the 3rd one... we'll never know, 'cause Jerry stops the tape before the singing starts, apparently because the song's got something to do with her. Jerry opens up and vents with his ex girlfriend. Angie tells him that no matter what happened between them, she'll always be his friend and will be there for him when he needs her. Jerry takes her home and almost tries to kiss her but nothing happens. Angie's not so sure about the promise she made to Jerry and about her determination to always act as the good girl who does the right thing. Angie calls Eddie and they have a playful fight about her mysterious second name and the petname Eddie chooses for her. The situation escalates when Angie innocently tells Eddie she met Jerry. The singer gets mad at her on the phone. Meg tells her roommate her friend Jane from New York had called looking for her. Angie tenses up, leaves the apartment with an excuse and calls Jane from a payphone. Next morning Eddie apologizes to Angie and admits his jealousy issues and they make up. Eddie can feel she's hiding something but doesn't want to push.
***WARNING: THE BEGINNING MAY SOUND STRANGE AND YOU’LL WONDER IF YOU’RE READING THE RIGHT FIC. BUT IT’LL MAKE SENSE IN THE END, TRUST ME***
***
Kingdom of Talmaren, year X of the New Era
Prince Alexander ran the back of his hand across his mouth to clean off the blood that had just splattered on it. Luckily it wasn't his. The battle had left him exhausted and without strength but there was no time to rest: Basil was surely a warrior as good as merciless, and also a sadist and a pig. To see him reduced to a lifeless ragdoll, sprawled on the floor of his dark Lord's bedroom, would make most of the people of the West Lands breathe a sigh of relief. Anyway he was just the stupid lackey of that monster called Kaspar, who was still damn alive.
Kaspar, King of Talmaren, known as The Bloody, the man who, as soon as he ascended the throne, had started a war that had been dragging itself for almost ten years, and who had already destroyed five of the seven known kingdoms. Among them was Senaria, Alexander's homeland. Officially the war called for mere territorial expansion but it hid a totally different purpose. That purpose laid before the prince's frozen eyes and had the features, now almost unrecognizable, of the woman he loved, her arms chained to the iron bedpost of His Majesty's bed. Her legs had been let free, presumibly because, even if she had used them to defend herself, there wouldn't have been too much she could do. Coriliana's face was a shapeless mask of hair and dried blood, whereas her body showed a horrible veil of bruises. Except for a vulgar necklace of black stones he had never seen before, the young woman was completely naked. Alexander's eyes were focusing on her ample bosom, where he'd often found comfort after the battle, his mind clear of every thought, until he caught a glimpse of an imperceptible movement of the necklace. Up and down.
She was still alive.
There was no time either to celebrate or to take a breath and lick one's wounds, Alexander rushed to the bed and just went at the chains like a crazy person to break them. He kept calling her to try and wake her up from her painful slumber, mental shelter from the abuse of any kind Kaspar and his clique must have subjected her to in the latest weeks. Setting her free wasn't easy. He was striving with his sword trying to deliver effective blows but of course he had to be careful not to hurt his Coril. His... She wasn't his, she couldn't be, she was special, a future queen, actually a future goddess. She was on another level and that couldn't have been possible, not anymore. But his heart would have belonged to her and to her only, for ever.
Finally the chain that blocked her left wrist broke under Alexander's blade and her arm fell abruptly on the bed, also for the weight of the cuff and the piece of chain that remained attached.
Alexander went fot the other chain. On his knees on the bed, holding the sword with both hands, he hit the metal with rage until he broke that too, almost at the same moment the legitimate heir to the throne of Senaria felt something brushing against his hip and a tentative and weak squeeze. He stared at her for a moment, maybe Coril's eyes were still closed (who could tell from that mess) but her hand was looking for him. In that moment Alexander felt some relief, together with a deep shame: he hadn't seen Kos' future Queen for months, he couldn't remember how long it was since he had last held her in his arms, since he had tickled her body with his fingertips and his tongue, since he had pushed himself inside her. Now the woman he loved was there, lying naked right under him, and as he looked at her, although she was unconscious and ravaged for Kaspar's torture, he was ingloriously aroused.
He came to his senses almost immediately, tried to move Coril delicately until she was almost sat down, then he wrapped her in his woolen cloak. They had to be quick but he couldn't take her out of the castle like that, that would be humiliating for her. Furthermore the biting cold of Talmaren's winter could have worsened her already precarious conditions.
In a second he picked her upon his shoulders like a bundle and ran towards the door of the chamber of horrors. She seemed smaller to him, he had carried her many times and never as a dead weight and he had never felt her so light, so fragile. He walked fast, but warily, the large corridor. He slowed down when he thought he spotted a moving person's shadow, most likely a man, projected by a torch at the end of the passage, where the corridor turned to the right. He took his hand off his sword only when he recognized Gabriel, his younger brother. He sped up again and nodded at him. Gabriel froze and reciprocated, slightly lifting his head, then he noticed he had found her and gave him the signal the coast was clear. The whole situation was so spine-chilling that it was impossible to just believe that but Alexander could swear he saw a smile appear on his brother's face.
The small army led by Alexander had camped on the banks of the river Neeto. To avoid the patrolling, they had thought about crossing the forest to reach the castle. Along the way they had suddenly found themselves in a small clearing, showing up out of nowhere in the middle of the thick wood, and the Prince had decided to make it their base. The fortress was almost at an hour walk distance and Alexander thought that, for saving Coriliana, a silent attack in the middle of the night, with a bunch of knights getting in without attracting attention, would have been more effective than a siege. For the purpose he had chosen twenty men to follow him, Gabriel included, leaving the rest of the infantry at the clearing.
He was now cursing himself for that choice as he walked his way backwards through the path climbing down on the Zham Mountain, the base of Kaspar's residence, trying not to lose balance and fall in the void. He breathed a sigh of relief when the downhill finally ended and the wood appeared, until he figured out paying attention not to trip over exposed roots and to avoid being slapped by overhanging branches, and also being careful Coril wouldn't get hurt either, was equally difficult.
He thought back at the way his brother had looked at him when he told him he would have taken care of Coril. Gabriel would have covered for their escape, together with the other knights, and then looked for Kaspar's spouse. If everything had went according to their plans, a few threats would have been enough to make her say to them where her husband was. Gabriel had understood the orders and had taken his leave with a bow, but not before giving a poisonous look to the Prince. Alexander had to forget that woman, he knew it well, and he would have done it, there was no need for the others to remind him repeatedly. He would have taken one step back one day, he knew he was out of place in Coriliana's heart, but he had to take care of her first, make her feel better, prepare her to the future that awaited her. A future on command, which didn't include Senaria's Prince on her side, if not as an ally in the war against the Bloody Kaspar and his people.
The profecy was clear.
He heard the sound of water, the river Neeto was close. He recognized the signal his brother had traced on a tree trunk on their way to the fortress and turned left. He followed another direction and found himself on the waterfront. Suddenly he felt Coriliana moving and holding on to him as much as she could. He was considering stopping. He would have made her sit down for a while, then he'd have quickly run to the river to collect some water in his flask. Then he'd have rushed back to her and had her drink some, through small sips, and he'd have used the rest to wash the blood from her face and hair. Without wetting her too much obviously or she would have caught a fever in such a cold weather. He'd have reassured her, the camp was close. He'd have told her that it was over and that she'd be better, that those creepers wouldn't touch her anymore, that he'd kill Kaspar with his hands. Or he'd have just stayed with her, in silence, looking her in the eye as she drank. He slowed down as he thought of her plump, wet lips, when these softly brushed against his left cheek in a dry kiss and whispered:
“Gabriel”
Alexander felt his knees give way. Suddenly the burden on his shoulder seemed too heavy, it was crushing him, but he quickened his pace nevertheless. He didn't mind the branches hitting him on his face.
Now poison had a completely different taste.
God, I'm sorry Coriliana but you're such a bitch. I shake my head and chuckle as I turn the roller knob and remove the paper from the typewriter. There's really nothing to laugh about anyway. I live in a shitty apartment in New York, I look out any of the two only windows and all I can see are bricks. I'm single, I'm alone, I don't even have a cat because the landlord doesn't allow any pets. I hear a weird noise, like a ring. The phone? I don't even have a phone, every time I need to call someone I have to leave the house and walk up to the phone booth right in front of the chair shop at the end of the road. And by the way, what's with a shop that only sells chairs? I don't expect it to offer complete furniture sets but it could at least have stools, armchairs, tables too. No, you can only buy chairs at Planet Chair. Like the one I'm sittin on right now, which comes right from that fuckin' shop. I buy chairs at Planet Chair and write bullshit for a living. What have I become? From an aspiring Hollywood screenwriter to cheap romance writer tha-
I wake up with a jolt, sweating and panting.
“What the fuck” I comment my shitty dream aloud. Thanks a lot Morpheus, what the hell have I done to you? I let myself fall back down on the bed and take a few breaths. The fantasy part was interesting after all, and Prince Alexander was definitely something, also because he looked a lot like Eddie. I'd have gladly skipped the part about my eventually disgraced future though. The phone keeps ringing and for a minute I'm afraid I'm still in my terrible nightmare, then I realize it's my actual phone ringing. I stretch my hand across the nightstand and manage to grab the phone on the second attempt, after it fell on the floor the first time.
“Hello”
“Is it Friday yet?” the Prince's, ehm, I mean Eddie's voice brings me back to another kind of dream.
“No, Eddie” I instinctively answer with a yawn, following the unwritten script of our recent favourite game.
“Hehehe what do you mean no? Today, it is!”
“What?” I feel I'm waking up completely, even though I don't want to. 'Cause I think that if I put some effort, I could close my eyes, fall back asleep, pick up the dream where I left off and quickly get to the point when that Coril bitch dies and Alex is alone and ready to be comforted by someone, who could be anyone. Like the farmer's daughter, who's like the exact replica of me but hot, skinny, blue-eyed and with straight teeth. Nobody had straight teeth in the Middle Age anyway though. There were no braces. There were no dentists either. It was a miracle if they got to their forties and still had like four teeth in their mouths. It was a miracle if they got to their forties.
“Are you still asleep? It's Friday, for real”
“Not really. What time is it?” I can understand why Eddie's impatient, especially after our little fight the other night, but I had no idea he'd go as far as calling in the middle of the night to celebrate the date.
“It's eight o'clock. Sorry if I woke you up, I thougt you were awake for a while now. Don't you have class this morning? I thought it was the last day before...”
“WHAT?! EIGHT O'CLOCK?” my braincells wake up all together as soon as they realise the alarm clock didn't work and I'm late. A quite unique occurence. I mean it's very unlikely for me to forget about setting the alarm and, even if it happens, it's impossible for me not to automatically wake up on time all the same. Panic is so immediate that I get up, grab random clothes and rush to the bathroom cursing under my breath. After five minutes at least I realize I forgot something. I run back to my bedroom and look for the phone. Can't find it. Then I go straight to the bathroom once again and right in the middle of the pile of clothes I retrieve the cordless phone “Are you still there?”
“Yes, you know I love listening to you on the phone”
“You haven't heard much I guess, except for a lot of curse words”
“Uhm not that many”
“And the sound of me brushing my teeth”
“And peeing”
“EDDIE!” the hair band I was using to put my hair up slips from my hands and is shot in space like a bullet, ending who knows where.
“Uh I heard that too, it's not my fault”
“GOD THAT'S SO EMBARRASSING!” I cover my face with my hand, as if Eddie could see me.
“That's real intimacy”
“Couldn't you just hang up?” I whine as I'm scanning the bathroom's floor looking for my hairband.
“Nuh, the live commentary of your madness was too entertaining, kitty”
“Well kitty here is not entertained at all” ok, if I start using this pet name too, I'm screwed.
“Come on, it's not that bad”
“Kitty is very embarrassed now”
“I can fart on the phone if you want, that makes us even and you don't need to be embarrassed anymore”
“Hahahaha fuck you, Eddie!” I insult him when I finally find the hairband, right on the radiator.
“Anyway, I'm seriously shocked: you forget things too, you know, like us mortals”
“See? Things can go beyond my control too”
“Wow, you're human”
“Anyway, I gotta go now, 'cause the human being here is extra-late and has to take a shower”
“Does it bother you if I follow that one live as well?”
“Why? Does the sound of water relax you too?” I pass the phone from one hand to the other as I take off my pyjama top and throw it into the pile of dirty clothes.
“Yeah, that's exactly what I'm interested in. Running water. It's not like I think about you naked in the shower or anything”
“Come on, I can't stay on the phone, I gotta go” I'm thinking of a long list of jokes about Eddie's horrible taste but I have no will or time to make him upset so early in the morning. Well, early... it's already past eight. Past. I take off my pants and kick them in the laundry basket.
“You know you could have brushed your teeth directly in the shower to spare some precious minutes? You're clearly a newbie at being late”
“And I hope I'll stay a newbie. I'll call you after lunch, ok?”
“Ok... Wind?” I stand up straight and the panties I was taking off remain rolled up around my knees.
“...”
“Angie?”
“Uh...” I look around, lost and uncomfortable, as if I found myself suddenly naked in front of Eddie. And after all, that's the way it is.
“WAIT, DID I GET IT RIGHT??”
“Almost”
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALMOST? AM I RIGHT OR NOT?”
“You are... half right” I finally remove all my clothes and take a towel.
“Half?”
“I'll tell you later, gotta go now” I get into the bath tub and place the towel on the stool right next to it.
“Later my ass, tell me now”
“It's half the name” I'm standing in the tub, late, phone in one hand and showerhead in the other, can't we just postpone this conversation?
“So you're WindSomething? Or SomethingWind?”
“Exactly”
“Exactly what? First or second one?”
“Later Ed, byeee”
“OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE, ANGIE?!”
********************************************************************************************************************************
“Thank you, huh? Goodbye, sir!” I address my greetings right at the back of the guy who's just bought a carton of Pall Mall Extra Mild smokes and left without saying a word to me. I can understand someone may not be in the mood for talking, socializing or interacting like a human being from time to time. And I'm the flag bearer of the idea that you can't judge the others, especially strangers, because you have no idea what shit they're going through. But, even in my darkest moments, I never forgot to say good morning or thank you to the shop assistant, the waiter or the check-out girl. Cause these people are already working shitty jobs, exploited and underpaid, and shouldn't be deprived of their dignity as well. And by the way, I'm pretty sure being kind is free. This customer must have had a really terrible day though because he doesn't reply to me and almost doesn't notice the person who's getting into the mini market at the same time, barely avoiding a collision.
“Hey, watch where you're going!” as soon as I hear him cussing at the cigarette guy, I look up to his face and now it's me colliding with a pair of keen green eyes.
“You showed up early Stone, your girlfriend gets off in half an hour” Hannigan talks to him before me, as I'm occupied nibbling on a hangnail on my thumb.
“Uhm can't we make it a little sooner? We've got soundcheck at seven” Stone looks at the clock on the wall right behind me and adjusts the Chicago White Sox cap on his head, the one he wears every time he wants to piss Eddie off a little. That means at every show.
“Oh wow, Grace, I didn't know you were part of the band too, what do you play?”
“Grace is not part of the band. She plays... me, she gently strokes the strings of my heart, music that gets my soul vibrating.” Stone keeps talking with my boss like I wasn't here but I'm not upset, the thing actually amuses me. It's like I'm watching an episode of The Muppet's Show, that is more or less the way I feel every time Stone talks to someone about me “And if I can't vibrate, I can't perform”
“If Grace performs in labelling cereal and stocking the shelves up, I'll let you go vibrating wherever you want, ok?” the boss talks about me in third person too, as if I wasn't present, and at this point I finally have a reaction.
“Ok, thanks. I'll do it immediately” I check my thumb to make sure I didn't bite it all off together with the hangnail as I leave to go to the storage room.
Stone. What the hell are you doing here, Stone? Well, I know what you're doing here but what I'm asking is... how? I mean, you disappear for days, to let everything I told you sink in. And it's not like I wanna blame you for that, I understand you. But what about now? You show up just like that, like nothing happened, to take me to the show? Without asking me first? You didn't even ask me if I wanted to go, if I have something else to do. You basically didn't speak to me.  Your heart... I'd rather make your teeth vibrate hitting you with the price gun instead!
“Do you need help?” I turn around when I hear his voice and I'm this close to making my previous fantasy come true.
“No, thanks” I set the correct price and start labelling the boxes.
“Don't you have another of those tools? Ok wait, I'll line them up for you, so you'll make them faster.” Stone starts piling up the boxes all in the same verse, so as to make it easier for me. Once he stacks three piles, he walks away and comes back in a minute with two empty cartons, where he puts the already priced cereal boxes.
“Why are you better than me at my job?” I'd want to tell him with a frown, an arrogant tone, a pissed off mood. But in the end, I tell him smiling because I missed him and I'm happy he's here. Because if he's here, it means everything's alright. Or not?
“I'm just better at organizing, that's it.” he shrugs and gives me the kiss I've been waiting for since I saw him on the door, while his hand crawls along my arm until he steals my pricing gun “Go refill the shelves, I'll go on here”
“Ok, boss”
“What happened now? Did Hannigan make you label the whole storage room? You should have been faster, I taught you the method” Stone comments on me being late as I get into his car.
“Sorry, I had to get myself ready somehow. If I had known before, I'd have left my apartment looking more presentable” I go on as I check my eyeliner work in the wing mirror.
“What does it mean if I had known before? I've been telling you about this show for weeks” Stone looks surprised and I can't understand if he's really stupid or just acts like one.
“I knew about the concert, I didn't know if you wanted me there...”
“The fuck are you talking about? We also agreed you'd come to the soundcheck too”
“Yeah, but we agreed on that before...”
“Before?” so you're just gonna play dumb and act as if nothing happened?
“Before our talk. You know, the talk...”
“So what? The talk didn't change anything”
“No?”
“Of course not, I don't think that the Ok Hotel has a policy of prohibiting entry to people with prosthetics” so the answer to my previous question to myself is that you are stupid. Because, even if  you're doing it on purpose, you do that because this is what you are: a jerk.
“And between us?”
“We didn't set up any policy between us”
“Did the talk change anything between us?” the only way to interact with Stone in cases like this is ignoring what he's saying and following your logical train of thoughts, waiting for him to consider you worth talking to for real.
“No, why?” he snorts because this time he has to answer seriously.
“Well, I don't know, you ghosted out for days, I haven't heard anything from you”
“I was busy, you know that-”
“Don't fuck with me, Stone, you clearly said you needed time to make up your mind”
“Well if you knew, then there was nothing to worry about, right?” Stone smiles and thinks he can solve everything with a shrug and turning on the radio. But he's so wrong.
“So?” I ask him turning off the stereo and earning a surprised look from him.
“So what?”
“Did you make up your mind?”
“Yep”
“And?”
“And now... my mind's made up” has he become a man of few words all of a sudden??
“And couldn't you shed some light into my mind too, please?” I'll light him up too, after showering him with gasoline, if he doesn't stop acting like this.
“Do we have to do it right now? I got the show tonight and a lot on my mind ri-” I don't even let him finish talking and I've already unbuckled my seatbelt and opened the car door, since we're at a stop sign “Where do you think you're going now?”
“I'm going home, see you when your mind's free” I reply as I shut the door and walk towards the closest bus stop, while Stone drives beside me slow with the window open.
“Grace, get back in the car, come on”
“I'll get back if you're talking, if you're not I'll pass” I answer as the other upcoming cars honk at and overtake him, yelling swears at him.
“Ok, I'll talk, just get in”
“I don't know” he could be much more convinced and convincing than this, if only he wanted to.
“Ok, OK!” Stone stops and turns off the engine, puts on the hazard lights and gets out of the car. He then walks past me towards the bus stop and sits down on the bench “So? Didn't you want to talk? Come here, let's talk” he pats the room beside him gesturing for me to join and sit with him.
“You're the one who's got something to say, I already told you what I had to tell you. And I understand it's something hard to digest, believe me, I do. But I'm also expecting at least some kind of honesty from your side. I mean, ok, you're here so I guess you wanna keep this thing with me going but-”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You guess? Did you have any doubts about that?” I'm slowly getting to the bench when Stone tugs at my arm and makes me sit down not so gently.
“Well, you said you needed time to think”
“To think about what a dick I was. About how many times I hurt you without knowing, maybe on that same night, using the wrong words or looking at you the wrong way, over- or under-reacting. To think about how much you trust me, how much must this relationship matter to you if you decided to tell me, about how long you must have pondered the way to do it and the timing. To think about what I can do to make you understand that it matters to me just as much and that I trust you the same way. To think about treating you differently and treating you exactly the same at the same time, not changing anything at all and being the usual asshole. To think about what I can give to you in this relationship that is just as significant, how I can help you, or at least understand you, what my added value is in all this. To think about how I can be close to you in this situation, but without bothering you. About how I can find the right key. Oh and I think I found it, you know? That's what I thought about, well, part of that, I thought about a lot of things, but questioning being with you or not wasn't one of them, I never had doubts about it, not even for a second, you can be sure about that”
“Ah” ok he found his words.
“Ah? I said like a million words and you were the one who wanted to talk and ah is all you got?”
“And what is it?” now I'm the one without words. Well, I got four.
“What is what? Ah?”
“The key, you found”
“Oh that. Well, Gaby Pearce”
“Who?”
“My nemesis in third grade”
“Uh, little Stone had a crush!” I have no idea where he's going with this but thinking about baby Stone instantly puts a smile on my face.
“No no, the story's not about little boys pulling girls' pigtails on playgrounds because they're in love, we used to really hate each other. Actually Gaby tried to kill me”
“What?”
“She actively pushed me off the swing at recess”
“Hahaha maybe it was about little girls kicking boys in their asses because they're in love”
“Well, she must have loved me a lot since she gave me a severe head trauma and I spent almost one month in the hospital, plus two of rehabilitation treatments”
“WHAT?”
“Yeah, that sucked. When my mother arrived at Virginia Mason's Hospital she was devastated, she saw me awake and ran to hug me. I looked at her and called her Bread. She fainted”
“Bread?”
“I don't know if this thing has a name, I was too young then and didn't ask later, the concussion had damaged the part of the brain that is responsible for language and speech. I could understand everything and could perfectly talk, but the things I said made no sense. I couldn't remember the name of the things sometimes or I could and I thought about a word but then I opened my mouth and a totally different one would come out”
“Bread”
“Right. Two months with a speech therapist to get back to the way I was. Well, even better than before actually! And thank God because you can only imagine someone like me not being able to talk”
“I can, it's like taking the oxygene away from you basically”
“Hehe exactly. Anyway, it all went well, it was only a temporary thing and I had no consequences at all”
“That's what you think” I joke to release the tension and I'm happy I can see my smirk mirrored by Stone.
“Hey, you can't joke about things like that!” he shoves me playfully than pulls me closer to him on the bench.
“Who says that? I remind you that I only have one foot, I basically have a free pass for cruel socially unacceptable jokes”
“Oh is that so?”
“Yeah, and since you have a sad little story from your past too, you have the permission to make fun of me as well and take it easy. This is the key, right?”
“Oh my god, no! You're way off, I'm not that cynical, shame on you!” Stone pushes me away again and he's laughing but I'm feeling disoriented for real.
“What is it then?”
“It's that I know what it means to start again from zero, Gracie. I don't wanna brag but I'm pretty sure only few people understand what it means to have to go through the process of learning to do basic things again from scratch. Walking and moving for you, talking for me. 'Cause I was much younger than you and I forgot a lot of it but I didn't forget the struggle. And frustration. Very few people know what it means to push yourself out of your comfort zone to achieve goals. Do you know I had just started playing the guitar? I had to start it all over too because apparently the left part of my brain went one way and the right one went the opposite direction and I found out the hard way this is not good when you have to play a fucking instrument”
“It seems to me that you recovered great” I take his hands while he's mimicking some sort of air guitar and rub his long fingers one by one with my thumb.
“Yes but I had to work my ass off, not as much as you of course, but it wasn't easy. Well no, I'm talking shit right now, it was easy after all but only because I decided it had to be, I decided I could do anything and I made it. I just had to understand when I could push myself and when I had to lower the bar a couple of inches and I did. I understood, I learned. And by saying this I don't mean to justify myself for being a fucking control freak perfectionist, but still” Stone laces his fingers with mine and opens his arms, as to say Here I am, I am like this, this is what I'm offering you. And I couldn't ask for more.
“I'm not a perfect perfectionist though”
“And you're perfect like this. I won't pretend to grasp everything about you, also because you're batshit crazy, but I understand the scheme of thought that's behind this thing, this part of you. I can tell when I can push you and when I must lower the bar, and you can do the same with me. I know what it means to follow your guts even when the others tell you to do the opposite, maybe even for your good. And I think you can understand it too, I mean, I'm sure you can. And it's extremely important to me. Because nobody in my life has ever been able to tell the difference between when I'm stubborn only for the sake of it, because I like it or because I just wanna show that I'm right, and when I'm actually pushing myself to achieve a real goal”
“Between being stubborn and being determined”
“See? You understand! Since I took back my guitar as a child, I never stopped. Never. I didn't stop when Green River split. I didn't when Andy died. I didn't when my dad suggested me to go back to college. And now it's my job and it'll always be. And it's not about fame, Mark Arm can say whatever the fuck he wants, I wanna do it because, of all the things I can do, and let me tell you, they are many, music is the one I'm better at”
“Uhm... you're pretty good at presumption too” he's good at everything, especially with me.
“I like to call it confidence. Or simply awareness”
“Are you aware that after this conversation I won't ever leave you because I'll never find another man who can talk to me like this?”
“Do you think I raised the bar too high?”
“Try and lower it and I'll kill you”
“Ok, let's go now, I'm late to soundcheck and Jeff must be making a scene already” Stone smiles and stands up, inviting me to follow him.
“Does Jeff know? I mean, about your accident as a kid...”
“Nuh, nobody knows, except for my family. And that Gaby bitch. Do you know she never even apologized?”
“From then on, I would have started to call her Bitch instead of using her name, blaming the trauma for that”
“You... are... a fucking evil genius! Fuck. Why didn't I come up with that? And most of all, where the hell where you in 1975 if not in my life?” Stone stops a few steps from the car, turns around and hugs me tight.
“Kenosha, Wisconsin”
“Oh. Shit. That changes everything though. Err... I don't know if I can be with someone from Wisconsin, no offence but I don't think I can make it” he lets go of me abruptly and gets into the car fast.
“Sorry if I didn't tell you this dirty secret of mine before, I was worried you'd take it bad” I get in the car too and I can't help following him in this new stupid joke, as always.
“And you were worried for a reason. But we can still be friends if you want”
“Start the car, Stone” following him but without getting lost.
“We can go badger hunting sometimes, if you want to”
“I love you” following him everywhere.
“Even though I can't tell a badger from a raccoon?”
“I'll teach you”
“In that case, I love you too”
********************************************************************************************************************************
When I talk to Angie on the phone in the early afternoon I manage to convince her to go to the Ok Hotel with me and the guys so she could be there for the soundcheck too. But I can't make her tell me her fucking name.
“Ok, it must be Windsomething because you're Angelina W. Pacifico, so it starts with W” I tell her as soon as she comes out of the apartment building.
“Hello to you too, Eddie”
“Windflower? Or Windchill?” I kiss her and ask her pretending to shiver but not pretending much since the late afternoon air is quite frisky.
“No and no” she answers after rolling her eyes. I kiss her again and she looks around, kind of subtly so I don't notice. But she should know I notice everything.
“They're in the van waiting for us. And it's Friday anyway, right?” I smile and kiss her once more and she looks a little less tense this time.
“Yeah, you're right” she smiles one of her killer smiles and puts her hand against my cheek before kissing me back.
“Windstorm” I ask, looking up soon after, trying to understand the weather.
“No. And now shut up because if you tell this to the guys too, you're dead.” she straightens up the collar of my jacket and takes me by the hand “Where to?”
“Down there, after the bowling place, round the corner... Windsurf”
“Hahaha no! Shut up!” she shakes her head and crosses the street with me, keeping her eyes on the van. And although she doesn't say anything and tries to dissimulate, I know in her head she's calculating angle and perspective to try and figure out if they could have seen us kiss. By the way, I already did the maths in the meantime and they must have seen us for sure.
“Ok but you'll tell me later, won't you?”
“Yes. If you get to deserve it”
Once we get right outside the van we see Mike and Jeff sitting on the front, both turned towards Dave, who's sitting in the middle between them, apparently very focused on their conversation. So focused they don't give a fuck about us. They must be talking about us and didn't notice we're right here. I can only imagine their reaction as soon as I'll open the door and-
“Come on, Lynch is a genius” uhm, no, I guess they're talking about something else.
“Lynch is a genius but he's clearly fuckin' with all of us, can't you see it?” Mike retorts at Jeff's claim shaking his head.
“That scene seemed perfectly in keeping with the show. That guy is in direct contact with another world, his art is full of what-the-fuck-have-I-just-watched moments” Dave tries to mediate but it looks like he's not doing a good job.
“A knob? A fuckin' drawer knob??” McCready explodes, startling both Angie and I. We look at each other at the same time, she seems amused, I must look perplexed.
“Hahaha I like the fact that of all the nonsense stuff like the Giant, the Log Lady, the owls, the man in the smiling bag, the one-armed guy, the Man from another place... the knob's the thing that pisses you off the most!” Jeff chuckles adjusting the hat on his head.
“What the hell are you talking about?” I chime in the conversation and let our friends finally acknowledge our presence, since they weren't giving a fuck about us yet.
“Josie's death, in the latest episode” Angie replies instead of my band mates, who barely turn around to look at us.
“When Cooper arrived, she looked asleep” the drummer starts to explain.
“But she wasn't and had just killed a guy” Jeff adds.
“But the guy didn't die immediately, you know, he got out of bed and took a short walk before” Mike jokes, looking for my support, while the other two keep on adding details about the plot alternatively.
“And she confessed she had killed other people too”
“Then it looked like she was about to disappear”
“But she didn't”
“But it looked like”
“But she passed out”
“She fell back on the bed and she was dead”
“Then she and the sheriff disappeared, a spotlight from out of nowhere projected light on agent Cooper and that's when the what-the-fuck moment started”
“Bob came out from under the bed making all his Bob noises and moves and shit”
“And he looked very pleased with himself for his interpretation, let me tell ya”
“But he disappeared soon too and who showed up next?”
“The fuckin' Man from another fuckin' place” Mike gets into the back-and-forth banter.
“And what did he do? What he's better at”
“He started to randomly dance on the bed”
“He did his fuckin' dance” it's once again 'Cready showing his little admiration for the character.
“Then disappeared”
“And Josie and the sheriff reappeared”
“And Josie's spirit was mysteriously teleported into the knob of a drawer in the nighstand” and it can't be anyone but Mike to mention the infamous drawer knob again.
“And she tried to get free from that fuckin' knob but she couldn't and the drawer knob took the shape of her face” this time it's up to Angie to add further details.
“And I was like, what happened? Who did that? Was it Bob? Was it the dwarf? You know, what-the-fuck-have-I-just-watched??” Mike questions us all one by one but we can't answer.
“And we'll never have the answers” right, Jeff.
“And that's the thrill of it! I mean, if they start giving us answers, then there's no point watching it anymore. Just the fact they've already revealed who Laura's killer was, well, it was a big dumb mistake to me” my girlfriend points out as she opens the back door of the van and I help her.
“I must say the show kind of died down a little after that” Krusen admits as Jeff starts the engine and Mike follows Angie's critic.
“I think Lynch didn't mean to reveal it until the end but the channel forced him to. And now he's fuckin' with us for revenge”
“With a drawer knob?” I speak up as I feel kind of left out of the conversation and I prompt another little hysterical reaction of the guitarist.
“That fuckin' knob!!”
“Come on, name another tv show that can pride itself of killing one character by turning her into a knob?” Angie tries to calm him down with a pat on his back, as I close the door from inside.
“Yeah, that's the ultimate death” Jeff admits trying to stifle a laugh.
“They could as well hang a sign on that knob with The End written on it”
“Err it's getting late, I think we should go” I try to get the attention of the gang since I notice Jeff hasn't actually started driving yet. And he still doesn't. He turns around instead and addresses me.
“What do you think about it, Eddie?”
“Eddie hasn't watched Twin Peaks yet but don't worry, I recorded every single episode, we can start filling your gap whenever you want” Angie pats me on the knee and takes my hand and does it right in front of Jeff. And that doesn't go unnoticed to him. I clearly see him looking down on our joint hands, even if it's just for a fraction of a second, then looking back up, smiling and turning around.
“Anyway my favorite one is Log Lady, luckily she's still a mystery” Angie goes on as we finally move. The secret we're about to reveal today though... well, I guess it's not as mysterious after all.
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