I wanna take this a bit more serious
♡₊˚ MY RULES 4 THE NEXT 6 DAYS・₊✧
- NO sweets
- NO bread and biscuits
- NO lactose (I'm lactose intolerant but I still love cheese)
- NO carbonated or sugary drinks
- sugar free drinks are ALLOWED
- meals under 80 cals
- 3/4 fasts
- 2 L of water per day
- vegs and fruits are ALLOWED
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Today’s eats✨
601 cals total
Proud of my self today🥰
Dad’s oven baked blueberry and cottage cheese pancake was real comforting - whole plate 254 cals🫐🥹✨
The hazelnut mousse was only 164 cals but it made me kinda nauseous…trying a different flavor next time🤞
Controlling my eating is so comforting
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Hiiii, soooo... I have been pretty disconnected since last year and my profile has been quite dead so, I wanted to come back with something, just that I wasn't sure with what.
Now that I have been thinking about it I'm going to start a food journal so I can keep track of my calories and macros and bring back to life my account:)).
I just finished the "New Jeans Diet", it wasn't bad so maybe I will do it again in a couple of days.
Now the diet I want to try is this one:
Sw: 53.6 kg
Gw: 48 kg (at least)
So, see ya tmrw;)
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i typed out my entire relapse plan for a post and it was full of amazing jokes, tips and tricks and the guide to a healthy way to lose but i deleted it cause i was too embarassed so im gonna make this post instead to inform you of this GEM of a post that you will never get to see.... sorry xxx
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Current workout plan
100 Squats
Swing 1 hour (200 cals if you swing hard)
100 Squats
Repeat 4/5 times daily
On weekends I can burn 1,620, on week days I can burn 1,408
I play to restrict at 250 per day because I already restrict a lot
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tw. writing meanspo for [personal reasons] / trauma-talk.
here’s the thing keigo.
when you do nothing but lay in bed all day, you don’t deserve to eat. people who need food for energy get to eat. you’re so tired, sleeping seems to help fix the issue, does it not? like mom said, when we were younger. you don’t need to eat. you have to be able to control this somehow. take back that control you say you want. food doesn’t run your life. look at our mom for example. she goes days without eating sometimes. maybe even weeks. she deserves every bite she takes. what do we do? sit on our asses all day, and watch videos. play video games.
some people don’t understand. remember the feeling of hunger. how much it hurt but it felt good? the aching pain in your stomach, but the feeling of knowing it was working. Everything we have been trying to do is working. [Purging] hurts too, trust me I understand. but when you make mistakes, you have to fix them. if at the end of the day you are not enough for someone emotionally and mentally, you have to be enough for them physically. be something good to look at. something pretty to the eye. remember all those cute things you wanted to look good in? all those shirts you wanna wear.
besides, we need to save money anyways, remember. not buying food would save us a looooot of money. money we can use for other things, saving up to move out. saving up to buy things we’ve wanted. things we can use to help us get what we want, to not eat. at this point, if your mentality won’t destroy you. your body will. you can’t fuck it up this time. we can finally have control over everything again.
people like you don’t deserve to eat. look how much this body weighs. all this extra room. how would younger me feel? knowing we failed her. promised to fix everything, and never be judged. why do you think you’re so insecure to take pictures, full-body? the last picture of you taken full body, remember? how DISGUSTING it felt to look at that photo? “is this what i look like to other people? how did i get like this. why did no one tell me it was getting this bad? how does my body look like this. i look nothing like i thought i did.” remember how disappointing it felt to know that. it’s time to fix it. it’s so simple to not think about food. we’ve done it before, and if you have to; stay. stay so you can fix it.
no matter who in system fronts, stay with them. thrive off the feeling of hunger. the feeling of internal begging. and being able to have the power to deny it. having the power to tell it “no”. and incase it’s not enough, let’s go into detail and memories about your exes.
that guy you dated for 6 months, who cheated on you the entire relationship. all the nudes you used to send to him. you ever think he thought you were disgusting but was too afraid to tell you he didn’t like it, because he knew how damaged you were. instead, he probably went for such a fit, beautiful looking girl, who had her life together, and probably had a wonderful diet. deserved to eat, and played the image part on looking like it too. when people explain what they’re not interested in and what they think is unattractive, they use your image. remember that guy in your friend group who used you for sex, twice?
And you gave it to him, because you liked the attention?
shame. this feeling you’re getting from feeling sick to your stomach from realizing who you are, and how people see you? this is what it is. this is what you need to remember how to fix it. how to get that control back.
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I think drunk ana is making a come back 🧐😂😂🤦
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did the math (kinda) and if i only eat when my partner eats out this week i can at least maintain what i gained if not just lose what i gained last week.
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Today’s eats✨
690 cals total
Vanilla yoghurt with cinnamon and cherry coke🍒🧸💫 77 cals
Kidney bean taco🌮 143 cals
Chicken pasta salad🥒🥗 280 cals
3/4 Lohilo protein ice cream🍦🍫💫 190 cals
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TW:ED
.
.
.
December plan :
Fast 16 hours or more
Cant eat after 8pm
If i binge eat i puke (unless if my parents are at home)
Workout 5-7 a week
Try to drink more water
Try not to be in the kitchen often
Walk atleast 10k steps (if im at home all day then 3k)
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