#dunno i just sometimes feel like that

[uncanny-tranny]

"The only person who can save you is yourself, don't rely on anybody else!"

Actually, what has saved me is books and my favourite video game and my cats and my friends who I've shared late nights and too-early mornings with and the dew-covered grass I walked on on the way to a competition bus in ninth grade band and the sunburn that kept me out of school for days the month prior.

I understand the viewpoint of how you are ultimately the person who can save you, but don't discount that you aren't an island. You aren't meant to be your sole savior. Let others save you, too. You are worth the care and love the universe has for you.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #like i understand why people say that!!! i do! i was abused and i know how hard it is to hand your heart to somebody else #but you don't have to be alone in saving yourself #i understand the cathartic feeling of climbing your way out of hell and spitting on everybody who put you there #like i dunno sometimes the way people say this just rubs me the wrong way... like we aren't supposed to be saved by others #like we aren't worthy of shared pain/joy and must keep it inside #ALSO WEAR SUNSCREEN. THAT SUNBURN GAVE ME SECOND-DEGREE BURN AND I COULDN'T WALK

[miqo-tia]

I like Alisaie's continuous distaste for self sacrifice. In a genre where self sacrifice is usually something noble and necessary, it's refreshing to see a character say "No. There is another way. You are not losing it all for this cause. You will live to see your efforts bear fruit."

#ffxiv #alisaie leveilleur #i'm gonna guess that her distaste for self sacrifices comes from louisoux #who did indeed sacrifice himself for the greater good #i dunno i just think it's nice. it like it. and sometimes characters need some sense flicked into them #there are a lot of instances where she shows this actually! #which also feels nice. she doesn't grow bitter or desperate enough to consider self sacrifice the good option

[shopcat]

i think in the hamster wheel of my mind a big part of where people go wrong with eddie and his shitty garage band as an extension is that they for some bizarre reason think he's gene simmons metal when he's jack black metal. heavy metal. he's tenacious d metal. he's school of rock. he's stoner lord of the rings metal he nearly wore blue jeans and plaid. jack black literally in real life once said eddie was the best character bc he's heavy metal like him. LOOK AT THIS

#🍦 #answer it's bc people think he's some mishmash of all alternative scenes without any actual knowledge of where the mashing occurs 😭 #eddie is . a heavy metal guy. A cool one. a nice one even. he likes rock and roll #it's so funny when ppl try and describe it and they've never heard the stuff he actually listens to in their lives for some reason #literally so much of the appeal of eddie's character within his subculture is that its theatrical and dramatic but its still grounded #he's very alternative and Out There but he's still just some guy. he's not wearing spiked leather jackets #in fact he's not wearing any of the other kinds of leather jackets i've seen people say he would ... TO ME #sts #if u haven't seen the clip he then proceeds to air guitar the MoP melody then shouts heavy metal is everywhere #i don't even know how to explain this bc it's like ... okay #the general .. VIBE? aestheticsm? is kind of similar to what people sometimes portray but they're missing thst it's tongue in cheek #like it's like that buff poster of him being this anachronistic homage to heavy metal album covers #fire and satanic imagery and skulls and lightning and big drama and ROCK AND ROLL #it's rock and ROLL man... #and people r making him this weird sanitised dork LOL 😭 when he's a dork in a different more fun way.. imo #and it's not that those types of people don't exist and that they're not cool in their own way cuz they are sure but that's not THIS GUY #he is an 80S METALHEAD... and yeah i try and ground him in thinfs and poke and prod at it until it fits my own understanding of alternative #scenes better but that's bc i've had a hand in the punk scene for years and years #i dunno sometimes i feel like ppl r just not doing the full potential and then going way too hard in this super specific direction #and he ends up first of all usually just a massive douchebag not sure what that's about. But a guy who he would in canon HATE 😭 #YOU ARE MAKING HIM A POSER. is what i'm saying #he is alwyas some guy before he's anything else and before he's that he's a 20 year old loser #you need to reflect this... You need to bottle it. ugh. ugh #so much of this reminds me of the time someone was like he would never wear PLAID #like are you kidding me. are you actually kidding me rn #ppl have this weird arstheticised mostly modern and mostly literallt just eboy Idea of what he'd wear it's crazy to me sorry #also it's ugly #i also think. this is so long lol . anyway . i also think going too ''authentic'' in the 80s metalhead direction also lands u w different #problems. my advice to people trying to write or draw alternative characters is they are People. before they are anything else #🍏

[exilepurify]

it’s been four months since December 2022 and I’m still not over the fact that Reigen was apparently so haunted by guilt from that one time in S2E2 where he scolded Mob for eating too many french fries that it showed up in the super emotionally charged eyecatcher montage during the series finale.

I wonder if reigen will ever find the closure he needs to free himself from the poltergeist of regret that obviously follows him around as a result of this incident. the confession incident really had reigen re-evaluating everything from the past three years.

#okay but this is such an ‘emotionally repressed but also sensitive and doting family member’ thing #it’s hard to explain #but my dad is a gruff and rough-n-tumble farmer man #but he’s also very sensitive and doting #so sometimes he will say something kind of blunt or tease me or scold me over something #and it really won’t even be that bad #but he will sit there for the next couple of hours and stew over whether or not he hurt my feelings #like that shit will haunt him until eventually he calls me and apologizes #bc he’s sensitive but also not super in touch with emotions so he’s not sure where the boundaries are sometimes #and by that point i will have mostly forgotten what even happened in the first place #but i always get the post-joke/scolding regret call #especially bc i was always a kid who was very sensitive to rejection #i dunno if this makes any fucking sense #it’s just very ‘emotionally repressed family member’ core #the girls who know will know #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #shigeo kageyama #reigen arataka

[puppypawprintce]

anyone else out there think severus is just a chronic pain haver. i know the dark mark pain is real, but i feel like he might be miserable in more ways than just mentally in other ways

#severus snape #hp fandom #like i could imagine him having joint problems or even anemia #also off topic but i don't rlly think he fits the gross gremlin archetype that i sometimes see #he seems sickly to me. moreover we actually dunno Why his hair is always greasy #i feel like he has some self respect at least to hold up a front to everyone #it's 3am if im speaking nonsense just sectumsempra me zzzzz

[phantomrose96]

Controversial opinion time, I don’t hate the idea of Tumblr Live. Like “hey I’m gonna go for a walk who wants to see the new flower buds”/“I’m gonna cook dinner and tell a story so I don’t feel like I’m cooking alone” seem fine to me, even appealing. But the Tiktok-ification and Instagram-ification of everything don’t sit right. And given how typically anonymous and faceless Tumblr is, a jump to “Live” feels pretty unnatural.

#I dunno #sometimes I see flowers and I’m like ‘I would like to show this to people on my phone’ #but there’s something about the melding of social media platforms #into the obsessively clout-driven models of tiktok and Instagram #that just doesn’t feel right #Chrissy speaks

[silverskye13]

There’s a saying: Character is what you are in the dark. Its meaning is simple. Anyone can be a hero when the world is watching. When the world isn’t, when you could get away with murder or mercy and it wouldn’t matter, when there is no one to point and judge… that matters. That is the measure of your humanity. 

Helsknight is sharpening his sword. He has been sharpening his sword, alone in his home, for over an hour. It was already sharp when he started. The edge hasn’t seen enough wear to be anything but. It’s been days since his last bout in the Colosseum. He made a ruthlessness of himself there, in front of hundreds -- thousands of people. He shouldn’t have done that. He remembered the showrunner criticizing him as he fled down the steps into the cells below.

“You could have at least tried to put on a show, Hels!”

He hated when people called him that. Hels. It felt… wrong. The place, hels, was the pit of everything left behind and unwanted. Stuck in some facsimile of the nether, inhabited by the dark unvirtues of a thousand different worlds. The place, hels, wasn’t even important enough to warrant a capital letter. It was a proper noun wasn’t it? A place. Calling it hels made it feel like something lesser, made it feel like a nonplace. Not the World, land. Not a God, deity. Not a living Hels. 

He was knighted for a reason. 

Knighthood puts a lot of stake by character. Doesn’t matter what kind, really, as long as it follows rules, and Helsknight is good at following rules. Putting order to the universe feels… nice. Like scratching an itch. That’s another good saying: scratching an itch. An itch on the skin is so easy to underestimate. It’s just an itch, until you can’t scratch it. Then it’s agony. Then it’s skin crawling off skin crawling off sinew and bone. An itch can be anything. It can be an allergy, an insect, a mortality. Once his only warning before a respawn in the Colosseum was the itch that told him a hit to the back of his head had gone through his skull instead of skipping off his helm. The itch had been blood running down his neck, before realization and void. Finding order felt like that; the itch from a trickle of blood, felt like scratching the itch and mending the wound.

It’s an interesting exercise in restraint, not scratching an itch. It’s also an exercise in madness, futility, and pain. The itch gets uncomfortable until it hurts. Sometimes it spreads. Your body twitches. You start to convince yourself you’ve never known what it's like to live itchless. You start to feel empathy for people that you’ve never met -- those mystical people with skin diseases or allergic reactions or plant rashes. You start to wonder if pain is really, actually the worst thing you can inflict on someone.

Sometimes, Helsknight itches underneath his skin. That is real madness. An itch so deep even peeling your skin can’t scratch it. 

Helsknight takes his sword off the whetstone, holds it up to a lantern to inspect it. The blade is sharp. The netherite is pristine. The enchantments glitter. He tosses it none-too-gently to the floor, listening to the ringing clatter as it tumbles across the floor. One of the tiles chips and goes plinking off like a dropped penny. The netherite stays sharp. It’s a good sword, the kind that feels indestructible. He was told once by a smith that a good netherite sword with the right enchantments can cut through iron like a knife through butter.

Helsknight always has a sharp sword. It’s expected of him. It isn’t a knight’s expectation, not really. Knights do more law keeping in hels than the lawmen, and less dangerously. There’s something to be said about a person in plate armor. No, people just expected Helsknight to have teeth. He couldn’t blame them, when he reacted the way he did on the Colosseum floor. Temperamental people have teeth, get dangerous, and bite. Even people who like him treat him like he’s rabid, only docile and slow right before the lunge. He doubted any of them had ever really seen what a rabid animal is like. Uncanny. Or maybe they had, and that was why they tiptoed like that. Maybe he is uncanny. 

Helsknight stands and runs his hands through his hair. He doesn’t like sleeping in this house. It’s too quiet. That’s why he’s awake, sharpening his sword, but it doesn’t feel right staying in the Colosseum cells. Unwelcome. People talk about him, or they don’t. It’s hard to tell. People just kind of… fall silent. Paranoia dictates they’re talking about him. A rabid animal itching in its skin longs to bite and spread the disease. They watch him like he’s about to bite.

He doesn’t know how to smile, put them at ease. It feels weird on his face. Besides, it’s not expected. Helsknight doesn’t smile. When he does, surely it's a bad thing. Helsknight doesn't talk. When he does, he must be angry. Helsknight carries a sharpened sword. If he doesn't, something is wrong. Helsknight is. Hels isn’t. 

Helsknight was knighted for a reason. He’s good at following rules.

Helsknight crosses to his lantern and turns out the light. In the dark, he stands alone in an empty room, listening to the world outside, and suddenly very aware of the sword he’s sharped and cast away so carelessly on the floor. He could stand here forever and it wouldn’t matter.

Outside, a group of people laugh uproariously as they walk down the street. It’s night in hels, or a late hour at least. They sound happy. They talk so easily to each other, conversations rolling around hiccups and stutters of joy, rivers running. There truly is still water in hels, nether or not. There’s an itch under Helsknight’s skin.

There’s a saying: Character is what you are in the dark. Its meaning is simple. Anyone can be a hero when the world is watching. When the world isn’t, when you could get away with murder or mercy and it wouldn’t matter, when there is no one to point and judge… that matters. That is the measure of your humanity.

In the dark, Helsknight wonders if he even exists.

#the barking writer #helsknight #character study #loneliness #kind of #i dunno #vent #kind of? #its been a complicated weekend emotion-wise #sometimes you just feel trapped and lonely you know #i spent too much time as a kid being happy for solitude #now people expect me to enjoy it -- and i'm too awkward to prove them wrong #anyway this is somewhat inspired by sleep token #ya'll cant just drop a phrase like 'im a waking hell and the gods grow tired' #and expect me not to get emo about it every time i have 3 seconds to myself

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

favourite twdg villain?

I'm a fond enjoyer of the St. John's as villains. I don't know if they're my favorite just because they're only in one episode, but I love the concept of this family almost immediately jumping into cannibalism toward the start of the outbreak, dealing in human flesh to bandits, and casually feeding this group their friend's legs.

Like... what the hell was this family like before the outbreak that all three of them were like, "Hey now listen... nothing should go to waste, the dead are eating people so why shouldn't we? We gotta survive and in our defense, we only target those who were gonna die anyway... like y'all."

Dude, Mark was shot in this shoulder with an arrow. He wasn't going to die from that injury. It's so fucked that these seemingly friendly people took the group into their home and then fed them Mark's legs.

If we take the idea that everyone is infected and have the capacity within themselves to become walkers, to become monsters, then the St. John's were infected long before the outbreak, y'know? Not literally, but something was wrong with them and the outbreak just further spread that infection and changed them.

But again, are they my favorite? I dunno if I can say that since I have a lot more appreciation for Lily now. Yeah, some of her writing gets a little wonky in ep3 of TFS when she goes on her monologues and shit, but y'know what? I'm into it.

You have to remember who we're talking about and the fact that she's the antagonist; Lily isn't some anti-hero in TFS who secretly has a heart of gold that's brought to light because she reunited with Clementine... she's a fucked up woman who did fucked up things in the name of survival. She's full of rot now. She sees kidnapping children and turning them into soldiers to protect her home as a means to an end, but she doesn't actually give a shit about the people she's taking. They aren't people to her, they're as the episode title suggests, toys in her game. The only one she sees as a person is Clementine, and while that makes her hesitate at first, she sees Clementine's a prize to bring back.

She remembers what happened in S1; her father had a heart attack and as she tried to save him, Kenny smashed his face in with a saltlick and then expected Lily to just stand up and help him get back to his family because "he did what he had to, he made the hard choice." Yes, Larry was a piece of shit. No one liked him, and you can even question Lily on him and she'll tell you that he has a lot of pain. Yes, it makes him an asshole, but he's still her dad and he's all she has. I mean... the simplification is daddy issues, but in all seriousness, I don't doubt for a second that many of Lily's issues stem from Larry being a shitty father to her.

Then everyone thought she was losing it when she insisted there was a traitor in the group, which she was right about, but she was unstable. She was unwell, but how do you help someone like that when you don't have training to go about it? Then Lily ends up killing either Carley or Doug and the group turns on her, and either she's left behind or she steals the van and runs away.

Then we don't know what the hell happened to her until we see her again in TFS, but like... a lone woman with decay festering inside of her joining the delta? Exposing her to their methods? I mean, what else did she have to lose? She had nothing, she lost everything, and she has a lot of issues. Survival is easy when you're numb, when you don't care about the individual; they're all just cogs churning to make the system run, and if a piece doesn't cooperate, you get rid of it and find a new one.

Plus I think there's something to say about Lily not wanting to be perceived as weak again. That whole display she put on in the cells? Telling the story of what happened to Minerva and Sophie? I get the criticism that it feels like Lily did a 180 between episodes but like... yeah dude, because it's a performance. It's not just her and Clementine anymore. It's a display of power and authority. She's playing the part and thriving in it as she ensures everyone else is terrified of her.

But then when Clementine and AJ get the upper hand? Again, she's not afraid to play up the pleading to earn enough sympathy to spare her- hell, just to let their guard down enough to strike and get the upper hand again. I mean, she's got nothing else to lose, right? If she doesn't go for it, she'll be killed and sure, you can kill her anyway but at least she tried.

Honestly, I look at Lily in TFS and still see that scared little girl playing the tough bitch, just like Carley said in S1. It's just now escalated from "tough bitch" to a downright vile person. She's so... lost? I suppose? Lost within herself and the monstrous means she's taken to survive.

I get the criticisms of how she was used in TFS, but for me, it's like when people complain about Minerva not getting the redemption arc she supposedly should've gotten, y'know? There's no saving her. Lily was never on our side, and there was no getting her on our side. She wasn't ever going to redeem herself. Even if you spare her and she drifts away on her raft, can someone like her actually find redemption? Or will she just find another group that'll feed into her rot?

Truly, I say let her be horrid. Let her be the piece of shit villain with a few fleeting moments of humanity. Let her drown in the blood she's spilled.

#asks #twdg lily #twdg andy st john #twdg danny st john #twdg brenda st john #twdg clementine #twdg minerva #twdg mark #twdg larry #twdg kenny #i know i used to complain about lily in tfs a lot years ago but past cj complained about everything tbh sksksks #now i'm just like babe lily's interesting as shit like not every villain needs a redemption arc just because you think they're hot #and don't wanna feel bad or because you want her to be like she was in s1 when she was sympathetic like... it's been years #that's like being mad that clementine isn't the same person as she was in s1... the difference is we got to see clementine grow #but what happened to lily is a mystery... but that doesn't mean she didn't change especially for the worst #i dunno sometimes i look at lady antagonists in media and then look at people's reactions and i'm like.......... hmmmm #c'mon now- if kenny came back in tfs the same exact way then y'all would be foaming at the mouth insisting he's complex #and morally grey and he's just really sad about his family dying and really he's a sad widdle meow meow but also the best villain #who should be spared because he always cared about clementine and aj and he's just traumatized and sad and amazing unlike OTHERS #like.................... okay sure mmhmmmm #side note but the worst thing about kenny is the fact that he IS a brilliantly written character but his stans tend to just be the worst #anyway i like lily she's a great tfs antagonist like i recognize there are some weak spots and i wish she has more of a presence in ep4 #if she lived but y'know... gotta make room for minerva being the final bridge boss so... yeah

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

Recovered Black Mesa Documents from the incident, #1 of ____

(Text on the pages below in case it’s hard to read)

(Pg. 1)

[CENSORED TITLE]

Project Codename: Free Man

Subject: Gordon Freeman

Sector: Anomalous Materials Department

Age: 27

Clearance: Level 3

Physical Description: Six Foot four inches (193.04 cm) Tall caucasian male, brown hair, green eyes.

Current status: Alive; No abnormalities.

Project Administrator: [CENSORED NAME]

Purpose of the experiment: testing revival and healing technology; Preparing for the possible event of a Resonance Cascade.

Time of test: Scheduled for December 13th, 1998 at 9:30 AM MST

Planned duration of test: 3 days (72 hours)

Current Status: Preparations complete. Awaiting subject arrival.

This test is the Second human test of our new revolutionary Life Support System, which is capable of both healing typically fatal wounds, and even bringing back an individual from the dead. This technology has caused multiple unforeseen side effects on its users, however with advancements made by Black Mesa engineers and the Lambda Team, we believe this test will prove that the technology will be in a suitable enough state to be used without consequences.

We have been approached regarding this technology from [CENSORED TEXT], which means that our new sponsors will be able to help develop this technology further and even fund future research. This new Sponsorship, the possibility of preventing death in Black Mesa staff during highly dangerous expeditions, Along with possible commercial use in the coming years, are more reasons for this test to be taken seriously, and more importantly, be done correctly and quickly. The following documents will be the results of every test, and there will be logs of all injuries and even deaths our subject will experience, and more importantly how the Hazardous Environment Suit will repair said injuries.

(Pg. 2)

Section 1: HEV Suit Integration

The Hazardous Environment Suit (HEV) Mk. 5 is a vast improvement from the standard HEV suit Mk. 4, with its main difference and technological improvement being the HEV Life Support system. Unlike the Mk. 4, this Life support system contains a specimen known as [CENSORED TEXT] from our latest expedition to [CENSORED TEXT]. This Specimen has properties that are known to heal even life threatening wounds, and thus has the potential of even bringing an individual back from the dead. This has proven true with previous testing, though it is to be noted that the HEV suit Mk. 5 is the best, and most promising version of this technology put to use as of current date. However, Dr. Freeman is to be noted as the first test done with this suit to test its revival capabilities.

-Dr. Freeman had received the HEV Mk. 5 at approximately 10:00 AM MST on December 13th. Due to a small hold up, being worsened by a single security personnel delaying Freeman’s arrival, Freeman had arrived at the testing facility around 30 minutes past schedule. However, despite this small change in schedule, Gordon had accepted the HEV suit without suspicion, even despite not being told of the Suit’s properties, including the slight painful sensations of the suit attaching IV tubing and blood monitors to Freeman’s skin. Freeman seemed to move on quickly however, and proceeded to the test chamber containing the Anti Mass Spectrometer (AMS), beginning the first test at around 10:16 AM MST.

Notes:

Freeman appears to have had no problems resulting from the HEV suit’s integration, not even during the suit’s Life Support startup. This is promising, considering the negative effects the technology had on previous subjects. (See Incident log #32; Subject Shephard)

Conclusion of section:

-Despite Freeman remaining unaware of the test, it is best to inform any and all staff participating in said test to not disclose any information that Freeman does not need or could affect the results.

-Continue to Stage Two: Resonance Cascade Simulation (RCS)

#Project: Freeman (half life au) #Subject: Gordon #half life #Gordon freeman #shmorp writes sometimes #???? I dunno what to tag it as cause. it’s not art #HEHEHEHEH I love fake science documents #I wanted to make these cause. I feel like they tell the story in a more interesting way than just. saying it #is it the best? does it accurately show what the scientists would be saying down to exact word usage? #no. no it doesn’t. but I don’t care I wanted to make it anyway/VLH #so. here you guys go

[spookythesillyfella]

tony prepared the cereal !! sketch added the toppings !! and colin is a coward who won't eat what his partner and his sibling prepared for him !!

★ [ audio from "The Endorsed Frosted Crispy Sweets Prized Pals Commercial" – @/partycoffin on tumblr]

#sometimes i sit . and i think that i should put the phone down and never make content again #the dread of being the only person who cares about my stuff is consuming me every day and i just want someone who would love to hear me – #– rant about the guys for absolutely no reason . no one really has the time for me so i just feel sorta strange #i dunno #i guess venting in the tags of my posts makes me feel better but it just feels like attention-seeking behavior #then again i assume no one reads my tags anyways #whatever #little guys who give me brainrot stuff #dhmis #dhmis art #dhmis au #high voltage au #dhmis sketchbook #sketchbook dhmis #dhmis hv sketchbook #dhmis tony #tony the talking clock #dhmis hv tony #dhmis colin #colin the computer #dhmis hv colin #i guess having some more free time and going to comicon is coming up #so that's neat i suppose #im planning on painting my nails neuvillette color [blue and white] :3 #okay bye-bye guys #drink water #i love y'all #<3

[uncanny-tranny]

I'm aware many people (including myself) are uncomfortable with this framing, but I can't help but love the "sometimes, a little girl grows up to be a man, and sometimes, a little boy grows up to be a woman"

How eloquent, how beautiful is it to describe the growing-up of a trans youth? Something about it feels soft and so unabashedly human.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #i never saw myself this way but i love seeing others describe themselves that way #something about it is POETIC okay #sometimes it isn't that you feel you always *were* a gender. sometimes you BECOME it... #...isn't that beautiful? isn't that amazing? #a man who wasn't always a man is not less of a man and that's what we need to remember #sometimes there's a stigma in trans communities where you're not 'supposed' to have felt like a different gender... #...but that's running off the assumption that you HAVE to be stagnant and never develop in different ways #i dunno this is a tangent i'm just being emotional about My People

[front-facing-pokemon]

#altaria #here it is… the bird that turns into a dragon-type because reasons… #i still don't think just from looking at this thing that they should be a dragon-type. i feel like it still seems out-of-place given their #design but HONESTLY i like it. i think it's a cool like. subversion. type thing. i would not look at swablu and be like Yeah that evolves #into a dragon-type. and apparently a really good one at that? i believe i've heard good things about altaria #ugh. good things. got a selection of GOOD THINGS on sale‚ stranger… my brain does that sometimes #when i hear or say innocuous phrases it's like HEY that's the same thing this OTHER guy said in this QUOTE you've heard before #dunno WHY but. it happens. and it just happened there. but altaria i dunno it's a dragon-type and that's awesome. i don't remember what i #said i was gonna talk about on the swablu post yesterday wrt altaria and i am too lazy to look back at those tags to remember #hi it's me morning of this posting at like 7 AM. i remembered bc i just looked. i was gonna ask if they were good competitively #and. i'm pretty sure they are. ALRIGHT LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SMOGON #ah okay not busted but generally good i guess. latest information states RU in gen 9 but UU in a lot of other gens. NU and PU in there too #bounced around a lot i guess. but here's my question. why? do i care #it's cute. and i don't care if they're strong or not… because they're cute…

[normalboyhours]

I was curious about something - does anyone NOT like being totally babied while age dreaming/regressing, or having it done to them doesn't help them get into the mindset? Like I like the thought of being treated gently and being praised for things (like being told "good job" when I make food by myself or "here, I can get that" if I clearly need help with something), but I don't really like the thought of having EVERYTHING being done for me. Even if I'm small it feels like condescending in a way? Like obviously for people who like it I'm not trying to badmouth it! It can be really good for some people, i just personally find it takes me out of the mindset if it's overdone.

#pup talks! #i figure it just means i dream/regress to a kinda older kid age than i previously thought #because sometimes i actually kinda like taking care of myself to get small #like i make myself easy food like a sandwich and put some oreos and cheezits and stuff there too #and i imagine someone being there to help me if i need it #like i dunno that weirdly helps me feel small #agere community #agere blog #sfw agere #age regressor #age regression #sfw regression #sfw littlespace #age dreaming #sfw agedre #agedre blog #pet regression #sfw petre #pet regressor #petre blog #petre community #petdre #pet dreaming

[toxifoxx]

truly at the end of the day its all about receiving validation

#<- was having a lot of fun drawing fat william till he stopped to think about what other people might think #<- very important that people like him just as much as i do #<- incredibly important (i love him so much and his character is so much more nuanced than the fandom ever gives him credit for #and he already gets shat on way too often by people who don't understand what they're talking about) #truly the amount of hate based around him being a murderer is insane. Brother he's not a real life murderer. he's not going to #come out of the screen and hurt you #I NEED PEOPLE TO AT LEAST LIKE HIM A LITTLE BIT *bursts into tears* #and i need validation #and getting people to simp for him and think oh hes hot 😳 is one of the easier and more entertaining ways to get nice comments #what i lack in skill and talent i can make up for in character design and suggestive subtext right? #ugh #i dunno it feels like the only way to get people to say sometjing nice about my art sometimes #don't get me wrong i adore drawing him slutty but. ougggghhhhhh #hope it doesnt sound like im implying he's less attractive if hes fat personally i think hes hot as fuck #its mostly about stupid ass conventionally attractive shit #and also that people get bullied for portraying him fat... That too #anyways #im normal again now #toxi.txt

[hollypies]

I lied. Death time

#art #help how do i anatomy #have a nice death #have a nice death art #yeahh i dunno. just felt like drawing himb. #been playing the game a bit. i got addicted so ive had to put it down for now. or at least limit my hours. #the have a nice death discord is super cool tho. specially if you need help with sometjing #useful because its got a lot smaller fanbase than others so i go to them if i need help with something #uhm. ive just been in a bit of a . decline lately? dunno what it is lol. been burnt out #ill be fine dw ! it happens sometimes. judt need to figure out whats bothering me cuz even im not sure #probably just me feeling obligated to draw only like. three things for my art blog instead of. yknow. doing what i want #which is completely my fault but i know people dont like my other art ad much as hk or sky. it. bums me out #which again!! is on me! im so glad people like that art i! i just need to get out of the mindset. its hard though #i guess posting this is breaking the cycle a bit huh #hehe

[4lph4kidz]

honestly hilarious how many punches ive been pulling for fear of coming off wrong wrt fucking homestuck of all things but it's not just lame cowardice on my part like i think since bearing witness to the kind of insane fandom discourse that existed 2016-2020 i'm half convinced i'll be skinned alive if i imply something strange or unsavory about somebody's blorbo. but actually no that makes it sound like there will be tangible consequences for mildly irritating someone on the internet which isn't true generally speaking it's just the rsd/ocd and i need to get over the idea of people not liking me

#what having several thousand followers does to a motherfucker with problems. #then again this stems from an actual experience i had w a big fandom creator blowing up at me for saying dirk was in the wrong sometimes #dunno if this ramble makes sense but you're getting it anyway #i should grow a spine or something #i don't even want to change anything i do all that much i just want to stop worrying so much about this kind of thing bc it gets in the way #i'm tired of feeling like i should steer clear of putting forward #even the most mildly unpleasant/strange/controversial of ideas just because someone might not like it #that's not! how you make! art! #it's something i need to get over with in general not just wrt to fan content lmao