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#douglas booth imagine
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need help ~ nikki sixx;the dirt
word count: 1789
request?: yes!
“The dirt Nikki sixx x female reader, the reader been best friends with Nikki sense they were kids and became friends through them having terrible home lives, when motley Crüe started up she was their cheering him on. The reader also been in love with Nikki for a long time but when Nikki starts taking heroin she ends up finding him and taking care of him and this happens more than once but after he overdoses the reader snaps and says that she can’t keep watching the man she loves doing heroin. Please and thank you”
description: after finding her friend overdosing, they have a heavy talk about his addiction and his desire to get help
pairing: nikki sixx x female!reader
warnings: swearing, mentions of drugs, mentions of overdosing, lil angst?
masterlist (one, two)
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It wasn’t the first time I had found Nikki in the midst of one of his highs. In fact, it was becoming such a regular occurrence that I usually expected Nikki to be high as a kite whenever I went to see him.
What I didn’t expect this time around was to find him almost dead. Or...I guess completely dead.
I had gotten a call from one of his junkie friends - also nothing new. He sounded frantic and scared as he tried to tell me there was something wrong with Nikki. I thought at first that maybe he was just too high and was freaking out because Nikki was also high, so I wasn’t too alarmed at first. I drove to the address that the guy had given me, convinced that I was going to have to carry Nikki back home yet again and nurse him through his heroin hangover.
When I showed up to the house and found it completely abandoned, a feeling of dread started to grow in me. I walked into the house to find Nikki on his own, passed out, with ghostly pale skin and dried vomit on his mouth and chest. My heart stopped as I fell next to Nikki and checked his pulse. When I couldn’t find one, I immediately called 911.
The ride to the hospital was mostly a blur. The paramedics let me ride with Nikki, but I was basically curled up in an anxiety filled ball as I watched them trying to operate on Nikki. Just when I had lost all hope of him being helped, one of the paramedics injected him with something and he gasped back to life.
Nikki was put in a hospital room to make sure the drugs fully left his system before he was discharged. They allowed me to stay with him since he had no other immediate family to call. I slept in the chair by his bedside while he went through his detox, which was probably the most uncomfortable I had ever been. But I didn’t want to leave until I knew Nikki was okay. I wanted him to wake up so I could tell him that I couldn’t keep doing this.
I was eating a bland hospital food meal when Nikki woke up. I watched him slowly come to life before taking in his surroundings. He turned his head and focused his attention on me.
“(Y/N)? Where am I?” he asked.
“The hospital,” I responded. “Do you remember much about last night?”
He shook his head. “I don’t remember anything.”
“You...um...well, you overdosed, Nik. Your heart stopped and everything. One of the paramedics managed to re-start it in the ambulance.”
“Oh.” I couldn’t read his facial expression, but I assumed he was shocked by this news. Or at least I hoped he was.
I sat at the edge of my chair, looking down at my hands. I couldn’t look at him. The words bubbling in my throat were hard to get out.”
“Nik, I can’t do this anymore.”
“What do you mean?”
I started picking at my hands. My vision was becoming blurry, but I refused to let Nikki see. I had to remain strong so I didn’t back down from this decision.
“I can’t keep watching you nearly kill yourself with drugs. I can’t keep finding you high out of your mind and having to take care of you until you’re well enough to shoot up again.”
“What are you saying, (Y/N)?”
I took a deep breath and forced out, “I can’t be friends with you while you’re like this, Nikki. I can’t keep doing this to myself.”
Silence filled the room. I was picking at a hangnail on my thumb until I accidentally made it bleed. I stuck my thumb in my mouth to try and combat the bleeding, which resulted in me finally looking up at Nikki. He was looking at me with sad eyes. I was a little caught off guard by the reaction and felt guilt building inside of me.
“You...you don’t want to be friends anymore?” he asked. “(Y/N), we’ve been friends since we were in diapers. You really want to end all that?”
I nodded. “I have to, Nikki. I can’t do this anymore. This isn’t good for me, and I can’t come to your rescue and worry that I’m going to find you dead permanently.”
“That’s not gonna happen.”
“I didn’t think so either, until I walked into a crack house to find you unresponsive and alone.”
“That’s because those idiots left me. That won’t happen again.”
I shook my head. My guilt was quickly being replaced with anger. He wasn’t understanding what I was saying. He wasn’t understanding the severity of the situation I had found him in the night before. He wasn’t going to get clean, he was just thinking about when he could get his next high.
I had to get out of there. I was no longer worried that I would go back on my decision, but rather I was worried of what I might say while angry. I got up from my chair, my body aching from being there for so long, and collected my things to leave.
“So this is it?” Nikki questioned as I headed for the door. “A lifetime of friendship and you’re throwing it away while I’m recovering from a near death experience?”
“Don’t give me that shit, Nikki!” I snapped. “It wouldn’t have been a near experience if it weren’t for me! In fact, there has probably been a number of times I’ve saved your ass. And do I get so much as a ‘thank you, (Y/N)’, ‘I appreciate you, (Y/N)’, ‘I’ll stop taking drugs and nearly killing myself, (Y/N)’?”
“I never asked you to do any of that.”
“No, you didn’t, but I still did. Because I love you. And I can’t watch the man I love killing himself anymore!”
The silence that hung between us was thicker now. I felt a wetness on my cheek as I realized I had finally let the tears start falling. This was exactly what I hadn’t wanted to say, but now it was out there and I couldn’t take it back.
I quickly threw myself out of Nikki’s hospital room. I made a beeline for the elevator, trying to put as much distance between me and that room as I could.
At least admitting my feelings made it easier for him to let me go, I thought to myself.
The sudden sound of hospital machines beeping followed by voices yelling drew my attention back to Nikki’s room. The brunette rock star was trying to shove past the number of hospital staff that was trying to coax him back into his room.
“Sir, you’re still detoxing, you have to go back to your room until the doctor discharges you,” a nurse was saying as she tried to push Nikki back into his room.
“I’ll go back in if she comes with me,” Nikki said, pointing towards me.
I felt my face heat up with embarrassment as the staff looked at me. “Nikki, you have to finish your treatment. Go back in and I’ll come see you when you’re better.”
“I don’t believe you,” he said. “I think if you walk out now that I’ll never see you again, and you can’t leave me after what you just told me.”
It felt like my throat was closing over from trying to hold back the fresh tears welling in my eyes. I managed to choke out, “I can’t.”
Nikki finally managed to break away from the staff trying to restrain him and rushed over to me. Before I could realize what he was doing, his hands were grabbing my face and his lips were on mine. It was far from being the picture perfect kiss you see in romantic comedies. It was rough and almost felt desperate. But it was a kiss, and I couldn’t help but get lost in it because it was something I had been dreaming of for years.
It was broken up when two hospital guards appeared and grabbed Nikki, forcing him away from me and back to his room. He tried to fight against them, but when he saw that I was following them now he stopped and allowed them to put him back in his bed and hook him back up to the machines he had been attached to.
I sat back down in the uncomfortable chair and we were right back to where we had been moments before, as if the last ten minutes hadn’t happened at all.
“So,” I started, “was that...real?”
He gave me a funny look. “How could it not be real?”
“I don’t know, it could’ve just been a tactic to get me to come back into the room.”
Nikki chuckled a little. “You don’t think there’s even the smallest possibility that I did that because I also have feelings for you and I didn’t want you to walk away without me telling you that?”
I shrugged my shoulder, which caused him to laugh again. “You’re so cute.”
It was hard not to smile when he said that, but I quickly wiped the smile from my face. “I still mean what I said, though. This admitting that we have feelings for one another isn’t going to change my mind. If anything, I’m much more firm on my decision that I’m not going to sit around and watch you kill yourself.”
Nikki sighed and nodded his head. “I know. I have a problem, (Y/N). I didn’t want to admit it, but I always knew that I did. I crashed Tommy’s wedding because I was high, I’ve ruined friendships, I almost died. I almost lost you. It’s just not worth it anymore. I can’t keep living like this.”
I moved closer to his bed and took his hand in mine. When his eyes met with mine I felt like my breath was taken away. He was always so handsome, even now when he was being his most vulnerable with me. Especially now that he was being his most vulnerable with me.
“We’ll get you help, Nik,” I told him. “There’s plenty of good rehab facilities you can go to, or you can try and do it on your own without the help of professionals. Either way, I’m going to be by your side every step of your recovery.”
“And when I’m clean, I’m going to do what I should’ve done a very long time ago and I’m going to take you out on a proper date.”
I smiled again at him and said, “It sounds like a deal.”
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michelle-is-writing · 11 months
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Left Behind ch.2, Nikki Sixx
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Word Count: 1.3k~
Read Chapter 1 here!
TW!: mention of prior drug and alcohol use, rehab, slight angst
Five months of being back in Los Angeles had proven to be just the same as when Nikki and I lived in Los Angeles all that time ago. The only difference was the new apartment I lived in and, of course, Nikki. I hadn’t spoken to him since the night we broke up, and it’s been slowly weighing on me as time goes on. Now six months pregnant, I try to find things that once made me happy like before, but it hasn’t been easy.
I don’t know how Nikki’s doing right now; I don’t even know where he is. The guys called me a lot when I first left, but I never answered their calls, and eventually, they slowly stopped. The only time I answered was when Mick tried calling me, and I explained where I had moved to and why; I didn’t tell him that I was pregnant, however. I hardly even turned on the TV anymore, too afraid to see a news report concerning his death from an overdose, only to be revived in an ambulance afterward.
Hearing what happened made me want to go to him and just make sure he was okay, but I felt like I couldn’t. I knew I was probably the last person he wanted to see, and sadly, I didn’t want to see Nikki the way I saw him before I left, strung out and barely holding onto himself as the heroin constantly coursed through his body. I don’t want memories like that coming to mind when my little girl eventually asks about her father. I want to be able to talk about the good moments we had before everything came crashing down, and I ended up where I am now.
Getting home from my shift as a hospital receptionist, I sit down on my couch and rest as my back relaxes from the reduced straining caused by my large bump. I didn’t think I’d be this big until maybe the last couple of months, but that’s not too far away. I just wish the swollen feet would go away. Out of everything, that has to be the worst part of my pregnancy.
Hearing a knock at my front door, I lift my head from the back of the couch and look toward it. In the time I have rented this place, no one ever comes to my door, not even solicitors.
Standing up from my couch, I walk over to the door before looking out the peephole, only to see an all too familiar figure. However, there are a few differences between him now and the last time I saw him. A small noticeable difference is the small strip of hair growing down his chin. On the other hand, the major difference is the healthy look he has, all while being nervous as he stands in front of my door. I’ve never seen Nikki insecure about anything, always finding confidence from somewhere.
Unlatching my door, I open it, Nikki’s eyes instantly catching mine as he comes into my full view. He doesn’t look sick like he used to, with the skin around his eyes no longer holding a purple hue to it and his cheeks appearing a tad fuller. By the looks of it, Nikki might even pass as clean to someone, but for me, I find myself in disbelief at the thought. I can’t assume anything and make myself hopeful like so many times before.
“Hi,” I murmur, completely lost as I stare at the man in front of me. He shyly smiles back, also appearing lost for words. Mick must’ve told him where I was since I haven’t told anyone else.
“Hi, baby,” he responds, his eyes flickering down to my noticeable bump before flashing back to mine, now wet with tears. “I’ve missed you, a lot… You have no idea.”
“Where have you been, Nikki?” I can’t help but ask, taking a step outside my door to fully face him. His arms awkwardly linger by his sides, not quite knowing what to do with them. A long time ago, Nikki would have instantly taken the chance to pull me close, but now, his actions are halted by uncertainty.
“In all honesty, I’ve been in rehab for the past several months,” he confesses, my eyebrows jolting in slight shock at his revelation. “Me and the guys, we all checked ourselves in. And now, we’re finally clean,” Nikki adds, his smile shining with a bit of pride now. At the same time, I also feel myself proud of him despite everything else.
“That’s great, Nikki,” I tell him, watching a tear slip from his eye. My instincts tell me to wipe it away from his cheek, but the hurt that remains holds me back from doing so.
“I-I know what I said when you left was horrible, and I can’t begin to tell you how sorry I am,” Nikki tells me, causing the harsh memories to flow back into my mind. “I’m so sorry, baby. I never wanted to hurt you, and I’m sorry I did,” he continues, making me tear up as he steps forward to cup my cheek in his hand. “My memories of us were the only thing getting me through withdrawals, and every time I thought about the night you left, I broke down. I never wanted to lose you, and I never wanted you to go through anything alone.”
My eyes squeezed close at his last comment, the reminder of what he used to say to me, making my heart clench in my chest. “Two against the world,” I can hear his voice from long ago say. The words were a reminder that I wasn’t alone in anything I did; I had someone there to catch me if I fell. But I’ve been alone for a while now, and it’s not that easy for me to just open myself up to him all at once like before, unfortunately.
Seeing his eyes linger on my belly, I find the courage to take his hand in mine and rest it against my bump. “Why don’t you come inside, and we can talk some more,” I suggest, his hand ever so gentle as he runs it against my sweater. “I can show you pictures of our baby girl too, if you’d like,” My voice ends up in a whisper as I say the words I’ve wanted to tell Nikki ever since I discovered our baby’s sex.
At my comment, Nikki looks back at my face with even more tears clouding his eyes before pressing his lips to mine in the softest kiss Nikki has ever given me. His hand still remains on my belly, albeit his fingers are now intertwined with mine. I didn’t think I’d get to do this with Nikki again; I didn’t even know if I’d ever get to see him again.
Pulling away from the kiss, Nikki’s smiling face lingers in front of mine as he rubs his thumb against my cheek. His touch still remains gentle, careful with every move he makes. “I’d love to, baby,” he answers me, his voice choked up a bit. “I’d love to more than anything.”
Smiling back, I can’t help but feel more tears begin falling from my eyes. This feels almost unreal to me, and I can’t help but feel an overwhelming amount of emotions hit me all at once. Nikki holding me just like he used to is one of the best things I’ve ever experienced, and as he wipes away my incessant tears, I realize just how amazing this moment is. Nikki is clean, he knows about his little girl, and he’s finally back. The Nikki I once loved is back.
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oskea93 · 3 months
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Keep it to Yourself (1)
✶ Douglas Booth!Nikki Sixx x OC ✶
Warning: This story will contain scenes of drug/alcohol use, sexual content, mentions of death, overdose, physical and emotional abuse. Please read at your own risk. I do not own rights to Motley Crue or any other famous person mentioned. Portions of this story will be pulled from Motley's book and film The Dirt as well as The Heroin Diaries. There will be parts that are complete fiction as well.
Taglist: @fancywasmyname1, @kaitieskidmore1, @xxisxxisxxis, @sparxx27,  @cruecifymesixx, @tempt-ress, @a-sia-san, @x-xinenas, @casualcomputerarbiter-blog​, @makaelahdelvalle
Author's note: Hello everybody! It's been a while since I thought about this story but now I want to bring it back to life. I think I rewatched The Dirt about 20 times in the past couple of days (Thanks snowstorm!) and i've been thinking about this story and all the other amazing Crue stories that are on Tumblr. So, with that being said - I have decided to rewrite Keep it to Yourself. I went back and read the original version and I want to revamp it in a way. I've changed a couple things and I hope to make it better than before. If you were tagged in the original version, I went ahead and just tagged you for this new update. If you would like to be removed, just let me know and I will take you off. If you aren't a part of the taglist and would like to be, just let me know and I will get you added. I hope you enjoy the new and improved Keep it to Yourself!
“Bryant –“ He paused. “I know I’m probably the last voice you wanna hear on your answering machine, but I desperately need your help right now.” A breathy sigh blew through the speaker. “I’m at my wits end and I have no idea what to do with him.”
I stared at the device – my hand curled against my mouth as his words flowed through my living room. “The drugs are constant – he’s high 24/7 – Half the time I don’t even know if he’s alive or dead when I get into his room. It’s not just him – they’re all fucked – but he’s the only one with one foot in the casket.”
How he got my number remained a mystery. They made him millions of dollars – more money than the man could even count – yet he was calling me about his issue. From the beginning, I told him that it would only get worse. The guy had issues way before he formed Motley – way before the money and fame came into the picture. Sure - he dabbled in drugs before hitting peak stardom, but the money was there, and he was a kid in a candy store.
“I know the two of you ended on such a sour note, but I feel like you’re the only one that can truly help him get out of this fucking mess. He needs you – I – we all need you, Bryant.” He went on to leave the number to the hotel they were staying at for the night. Begging one last time for my help. I must’ve played the damn message 10 times – each time making my anger rise. Doc was the one who let it get to this point – he fueled the fire when it should’ve been sprayed out years ago. He pushed the drugs in their direction – Nikki was always a step ahead though. He attracted the slime that had the harder, faster drugs. The drugs that would make him feel nothing when in reality his whole fucking world was crumbling down…
I continued to move the spoon around the cup, the sugar long dissolved by now. I was so lost in my own thought – Doc’s words swirling around in my brain.
“You’re thinking about going, aren’t you?” The brunette in front of me asked. “I know that look and that look tells me that you’re giving in.”
Hannah Hastings was the first person I met when I moved to South Carolina. She was an event planner – a free spirit in a Dynasty like world. She would spend hours on my couch, a bottle of wine being shared, as I spilled my entire life story into her lap. She knew all about my history with Nikki – how we met – our marriage – and the demise of our relationship.
I let out a sigh, “I don’t wanna go but something’s telling me that if I don’t –“ I paused. “If I don’t go, he’s gonna end up dead and then I’ll be blaming myself. At least if I go and say I tried and I don’t succeed, I won’t beat myself up if something does happen to him. Like – It’s not even a matter of if – it’s a matter of when.”  
“He was such an asshole though, Bryant. The man was toxic to you-“She reached across the table taking my hand in hers. “I don’t want to see you get hurt or worse. You know how drug addicts are – he could get violent and not even realize it until it’s too late.”
During the three years we were together, he never laid a hand on me. I was the one who had the heavy touch. Sure, we had awful arguments that pushed me to the point of slapping and pushing him away, but he always stormed off before touching me. The drugs at the time weren’t as hardcore as they are now though. I could walk in his house and come back out with a bullet hole this time. Hannah was right – drugs fucked with people’s brain – I’m sure Nikki was already there.
“Are you gonna tell Wyatt?”
I slumped back in my seat at the thought of telling my Uncle Wyatt. To say he hated Nikki would be an understatement. He warned me from the beginning that Nikki Sixx would be nothing but trouble, but I didn’t listen. He was used to guys like Nikki – being a kid from the wrong side of the tracks himself. He made a promise that he would do everything he could to protect me from men like Nikki. We only had each other and when Nikki came into the picture, the worst type of thoughts ran through his head. He knew what guys like Nikki did to girls like me – innocent until proven insane. It happened to my mother – her infatuation sending her straight to the grave.
“I figured I would just call him when I got to California-“Her eyes growing large. “You know so he can’t talk me out of it or worse come and get me.”
She shook her head in disbelief, “You know I love you and I’ll support you in any way –“I felt a “but” coming along. “But –“She smiled. “This is one decision I’m very wary about, Bryant.”
I felt the same way. I had multiple scenarios playing like film reels over and over in my head. Some pretty good while others resembled horror movies. Even I knew that Nikki’s reaction to seeing me would not be a good one. He broke my heart, and I broke his even worse. Besides the band, I was his only true constant. He barely had any family – his grandparents living states away – not even aware of their grandson’s antics. Sure, the art of touring and going to different states brought about groupies and so-called friends but he didn’t have anyone to call or return home to. I was that person for him.
“You and me both, sister…”
I waited for the line to connect – the operator being nice enough to connect me straight to his room. Doc and I didn’t really have a relationship. He was Motley’s manager and at the time I was just a wife. I was glad the guys had him at first – their success was growing like a wildfire but that was because of their drive for stardom – Doc was just there lending a helping hand. He was extremely pissed when I ended things with Nikki. His own mouth spewing curse words my way once Nikki was served with divorce papers.
It makes the band look bad when a member gets divorced.
Nikki refuses to get out of bed and it’s all your fucking fault.
Girls all over the world would stay with Nikki no matter what – cheating, drugs – Learn to turn a blind eye.
“Hello?” I sat straighter as Doc’s voice sounded – my thoughts suddenly escaping me. “Hello?”
“It’s me.” My voice cracking. “I – uh – I got your message.”
“Oh, thank God, Bryant.” He sounded relieved. “I was worried that I would miss your call –“He paused. “Or if you would even call at all.”
I stayed silent – not really up for conversation.
“Listen, I know this is a bit of a tall ask, but I really do need your help. Nikki – hell all the guys for that matter – are ticking fucking time bombs. Nikki’s clock is etching closer to midnight ever second the fucker breaths – and I pray every night that he’s still doing so. He’s high ever second of every day. He shoots up when he wakes and right before he passes out for the night. I have no idea what he’s even taking anymore. Shooting up, snorting, smoking – he’s the walking picture of Nancy Reagan’s campaign.”
My grip on the phone tightened as he spoke – realizing that he was more far gone than thought.
“I need you to come out here and help us deal with him. I think Doug and Fred can deal with the other three, but we can’t get through to Nikki. Fuck, it’s not even Nikki anymore that we’re dealing with. He’s so mean and terrible to be around. His moods go from zero to sixty – it’s even worse when he’s coming down. Poor Tommy’s getting married, and I can’t even imagine Nikki standing up there with him when he’s high off his ass. You’re the only one that I think can get through to him – he still loves you, Bryant.”
He still loves you, Bryant.
Maybe the old version of Nikki was still in love, but I can assure you the drugged-up version was only in love with his high. That was Doc’s way of trying to lure me in – telling me that Nikki still loved and cared about me. I still loved and cared for the guy too – the Nikki I met at a 7-Eleven almost 6 years ago. Pre-Motley Crue – before the fame, drugs, egos, and women.
“I’ll pay for your ticket out here and everything if you agree, Bryant.” He stressed. “I’m desperate – he’s gonna die if we don’t do something.”
I let out a sigh, closing my eyes, asking myself if I really wanted to do this. It was a constant battle with my head and my heart. My brain was yelling at me to tell Doc to fuck off, but my heart couldn’t deal with the thought of Nikki no longer being here. “You think seeing me will snap him out of this spiral?”
“I think seeing you will probably piss him off more but at least I know you’ll be there and have the chance to stop him.”
My brows furrowed at his comment, “You’re making it sound like I’m gonna be with him at all times?”
His silence confirming my question. “You can’t expect me to stay in the same house, hotel room, or wherever with Nikki –“
“That’s exactly what you’re going to do, Bryant.” He cut me off. “I need that man to have constant surveillance – can’t put a bodyguard in there with him. He needs to have someone that he’s familiar with – someone that’s gonna remain sober and not give into his advances.”
“Then why don’t you stay with him then?” My attitude starting to come out.
“I’d end up killing him and then all of this would be for nothing.”
I shook my head as I pulled the phone away from my ear. I could hear Doc’s voice as he continued to talk. “Listen-“ I spoke up, cutting his sentence off. “I will come out there but I’m only there for a week. Once that week is up, whether he’s getting help or not, I’m going back home.”
“That’s not gonna work, Bryant.” He huffed. “He gets more fucked up when he’s out on the road than he does at home. These fuckers waiting in back alleys and backstage – knowing that he’s looking to score – that’s where I need you the most.
I’d been on tour with Motley when they were first getting their feet wet. I watched as they performed their first gig at the Starwood and then when they were opening for bigger acts like Ozzy. Going on tour with four men – the four Motley men was not for the faint of heart. I saw more body parts than I cared to see. Drugs, alcohol, and women were being pushed in their direction – more so as their popularity grew than before. Nikki and I shared a bunk and even that got old after a while. Living with four men for months on end would cause any woman to eventually lose it. Nikki and I were constantly fighting. Hell, I was fighting with everyone, even Mick at times. This was their dream, and it was my absolute living hell.
“I don’t th-“
“What do I need to do so you will say yes? Walk on water – swallow arsenic? Please, Bryant. I have never been so desperate in all of my life.” His voice wavering. “You were in love with this man at one point – I believe you may still love him. Just remember the reason why you fell in love with Nikki and do it for that reason."
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prettyyoungandbored · 27 days
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Crushes [’You and I’ Side Story]
Pairing: Douglas Booth!Nikki Sixx x Female Reader
Author’s Note: Takes place before the events of “You and I.” I was driving through Hollywood and saw a cute couple that reminded me of these two. So thank you, random strangers.
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Nikki exhaled as he closed the door behind him. He was relieved to be home after a somewhat mediocre gig.
London was slowly but surely losing its edge. He could feel it and mentally, he was preparing himself for the eventual breakup.
He made his way into the bedroom, setting down his bass. His head turned to see Y/N curled up in bed, hugging his pillow. He smiled, throwing off his shirt.
He knew she felt bad that she couldn’t make it to the show. She worked a double at the diner for the second time that week, exhausting her. He told her there would be other shows. He wasn’t so sure now, but either way her rest was more important.
His pants hit the floor and he kicked it away. He lifted the blanket and crawled under the covers. He threw an arm around her waist, moving his body closer to hers.
Just as he was about to close his eyes, he heard whimpering.
Her whimpering.
He opened his eyes, hoping she was having a sexual dream. But then he noticed the scrunching in her face and realized he needed to step in. He leaned up and gently shook her.
“Babe, babe, babe,” he coaxed her.
Her eyes shot open as she let out a sharp gasp. Her hand was on her chest and he moved closer to her, putting his hand on hers.
“Hey, it’s ok,” he soothed her. “Babe, look at me,”
She turned her head to him as he pulled her into his arms.
“You’re ok,” he assured her, kissing her forehead. “You’re safe.”
She let out a final sigh. “Fuck.”
“Bad dream?”
“That’s putting it lightly. One of the scariest dreams I’ve had in a long time.”
She leaned back onto the pillow, the palm of her hand rubbing her eyes as if that would take away the memories of her dream.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he murmured, his fingers carding through her hair. “It’s over and you’re safe. I promise.”
She looked over at him, flashing a small but grateful smile. She moved her body to him, snuggling her face into his chest and letting the smell of sweat, cigarettes, and Jack Daniel’s soothe her.
He smirked. “I can think of one way to get your mind off it.”
He leaned his head down to see her smirking back at him. “Nice try, Sixx.”
He chuckled as he kissed the top of her head again. “Worth trying.”
She hummed in agreement. If she had woken up on her own without a nightmare, maybe.
“How was your gig?” she asked.
“Eh, it was a gig,” he replied with a shrug. “We were good. The band before us fucking sucked though. They were a bunch of KISS wannabes which made it worse.”
“You don’t like KISS?”
“I thought they were cool when I was a kid, but they didn’t stick with me like other bands did.” He glanced down at her. “What about you?”
“I had a big KISS phase.”
He paused. “That…somehow does not surprise me. Did Gene Simmons’ tongue do it for you?”
“No, but Paul Stanley did.”
He furrowed his eyebrows. “Really?”
She looked up at him. “You judging me, Sixx?”
“A little, yeah,” he snorted. “I wouldn’t have taken you to as a lead singer kind of girl.”
“I’m not,” she insisted. “I actually find other musicians who play other instruments in other bands attractive.”
A pang of jealousy hit Nikki, but he wasn’t going to show it. Instead, he smirked. “Oh yeah? Name ‘em.”
She propped up on her elbow, her eyes meeting his. “Eddie Van Halen, guitarist. You should know that considering I told you that I lost my virginity to a Van Halen song.”
Nikki made a face. “Yeah, I sorta pushed that out of my mind because I don’t like hearing there were others before me.”
“There was only one, Mr. Possessive,” she reminded him, poking his nose.
“Yeah, yeah. Ok, Van Halen is fine. Who else is there? You’re forgetting a big one.”
“I am?” she questioned. Then she snapped her fingers. “Oh yeah!”
“Yeah,” he nodded.
“Drummer!”
Nikki’s face fell. “That’s not-.”
“Roger Taylor from Queen.”
He sighed, shaking his head. “So those are your choices? Paul Stanley, Eddie Van Halen, and Roger Taylor? You sure you’re not missing any other key band members you find attractive?”
She thought for a moment. “Ok so there is a bassist.”
“But it’s not Gene Simmons.”
“It’s not Gene Simmons.”
“Ok,” he nodded. “Tell me more.”
She rest her chin on his chest, sighing dramatically. “I don’t know if you know him.”
He knew damn well where this going, but he was down to play her game. “I might.”
“He plays for this band London.”
He chuckled. “London…yeah, I’ve heard of ‘em.”
“So he’s super sexy.”
“Super sexy? Sexier than the men on your list?”
“Definitely.”
“Ooh. Ok, go on.”
“He plays like a god. Like his talent is incredible.” She snuggled close. “He has impeccable stage presence.”
“Impeccable?! That’s some high praise, princess. What else?”
“He’s got black hair. Gorgeous eyes.”
He hummed. “Gorgeous you say?”
She nodded. “He’s also really good at comforting a girl after a nightmare.”
His jaw dropped, slapping his hand on his chest. “It’s me?”
“Surprise!” she giggled.
He leaned his head back. “Wow! I don’t know what to say. I didn’t see it coming.”
She laughed, burying her face in his chest.
“Hey Y/N?”
“Yeah?”
“Out of all those crushes, which one do you like the most?”
She snorted and lifted her head up. “Who do you think?”
He shrugged. “You tell me.”
“Do you need me to stroke your ego some more?”
“So it is me?!”
She rolled her eyes as he threw his head back laughing. “You’re lucky I think you’re cute.”
“Obviously you do since you have a crush on me,” he reminded her. “So embarrassing.”
She pulled her lips back. “We live together, dumbass.”
He kissed her nose. “For what it’s worth, I have a crush on you too.”
She hummed. “And how many other crushes do you have?”
“Just one. You. You’re it for me.”
“Until you become a big rockstar and then have groupies.”
“Nope. I’m always gonna have a crush on you.”
She snorted. “Yeah, ok then.”
His smile quickly fell flat as his dark eyes softened. “Hey, I’m serious. I don’t want anyone else. Just you.”
The sincerity in his tone lifted warmed Y/N’s heart. She always knew he was serious about her, but every now and again, she needed a reminder that he loved her even if he couldn’t outright say it.
It was an issue she knew she would have to work on.
“And Y/N? I’m never going to let anything happen to you. I promise you’re safe with me.”
She pecked his lips before snuggling back into his chest. “I know. And I know you know you’re safe with me.”
His hand rubbed her back soothingly. “I know.”
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𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐏𝐑𝐀𝐘𝐄𝐑 ; 𝐧𝐢𝐤𝐤𝐢 𝐬𝐢𝐱𝐱 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
!! disclaimer before we start this girliez !!
it's gonna be a multi-part fic
it's based on the movie (i read about the band's and nikki's life, but it'd be complicated)
fem!reader will be half russian and half of another nation (you can insert yours here)
it's gonna have some TW parts as cussing, drugs, sex, miscarriage, depression so please read with caution!!
𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝟏.
word count: 2.308k trigger warning: cursing, pole dance, smoking
1981, hollywood, sunset boulevard
♡ 𝐘/𝐍 ♡
the fake lashes tickled her eyes as one of her colleagues helped her to ruffle up her hair, well, if you can name the other girls who pole dances with you in a night club 'colleagues'.
"i fucking hate this shit" she muttered, putting lipstick on her lips. jessica, the girl who helped her shrugged her shoulders.
"when you're done with that, you can go off with a guy. old men pays way much more then the broke, skinny rock and roll wannabe-ones."
"it's a good idea jess, but i want to use my young years, and maybe get a normal relationship." y/n knew that this decade had its own fuckboys, just like the teddy-boys in the 60s with long coats and hair with much gale, and the hippies in the 70s with those fucking irritating and bad-looking flares and too much color, and now... they had log hair, black clothes and bulked up with studs, now just on their clothes, but on their face, too. sometimes it was fucking disgusting, even worse than punks, but other times, it was pleasant dig into a boy's long hair while he ate her out.
"your choice, baby. two minutes and simon will come in, so prepare yourself." simon was the guy who talked with them; when to go to the stage and when their shift ended, handing out the girls' 'salaries' to them, always in cash, of course. dancing here wasn't her first option; y/n wanted to go to somewhere, where an audience could tell that she had a good voice, or just tell her to fuck off, getting into dancing and singing, acting universities were difficult and expensive to get in. but since she had to pay the bills in the house she shared with two other girls, collecting money wasn't that easy.
in two hours, she was dancing in the big area on the counter, letting men tuck money into her panties and throw it in the front of her legs. shaking and crawling her body to the music, she almost completely shut the world out from her own world. at least she could dance, and she liked dancing, as soon as...
a bolting light shone through the bar. it was impossible to miss that is was a camera light. what the fuck, she turned and saw a couple of guys standing there, making pictures in front of where she was dancing.
"the guys will be so jealous when they're gonna see this! okay, brad, could you-"
"what the fuck do you think are you doing?" y/n stopped dancing, getting their attention.
"just making some pictures, don't worry, babe."
"don't fucking babe me! you can't take pictures here, do you understand?" she hollered, climbing down from the counter.
"could you take a picture about us with your friend in the back? or could you call down her?"
y/n snatched the camera from them.
"if you don't fuck off, i'm gonna trash this piece of shit."
"i'd listen to the girl." two other guy stepped in, they had long hair just like the rockers they probably listened to. one of them, the curlier and brown one carried a drumstick with himself, tucked into his belt.
"sorry, but what the fuck are you?" fuckface brad's one friend asked him.
"just a guy who walks in here from time to time and doesn't break the rules."
"i don't fucking care, could you please go away? we have to take some pictures, give me back that shit!"
"this?" y/n asked, looking at the camera, then, with her heart stomping in her chest, she trashed it down to the ground, breaking it into thousands of pieces. the fuckfaces got shocked.
"are you fucking mad?!"
"you deserved it anyway", the drumstick-boy's friend said, but the next moment, y/n got a punch into her face, crashing into the counter where people stood before it. looking up, she felt something warm running down to her lips, but instead of crying being hurt, she grabbed the nearest bottle she could find, breaking it, she successfully scratched the boy's arm.
"fuck you!" she screamed, aggressively waving the bottle in front of her. "fuck off, right now, motherfuckers!"
"y/n, what the fuck are you doing?" simon got in the picture. y/n looked around; some of the guests and jessica stared at them, the rocker boys stopped punching the other two guy as she fretted the third of them with a broken bottle. "if you do it again, you are gonna get fired!"
the girl looked at him, laughing, grabbing as much as money she could.
"yeah? then you won't gonna get the chance to fire me, because i quit! fuck you, simon, and fuck everybody in this craphole! i'm done!" screaming, she walked back to collect her things. not saying a word to anyone, carrying her clothes and her wallet, she walked beside simon, pushing his shoulder with hers as he tried to talk with her. but now, she was mad and unstoppable.
"you can never go back here if you quit now!" simon yelled to her as she stood at the door, now everybody staring at them.
"you know what simon?" she asked, licking her lips. iron from blood. with money in one hand, she dropped her things for a second and showed up both of her middle fingers.
turning around, she left the place that was her second place to go, but not her second home. out the door, she saw that people were staring into the bar, probably they heard the fight.
"hey dude! give me a fucking cigarette." getting one, they lit it to her.
"do you know what happened? we heard yelling and screaming." a woman asked, y/n nodded, blowing out the smoke.
"yeah, it was me. and don't come here, because the motherfuckers replace half of the whiskey with water." then walking away, she sat down on the side of the road, smoking the stick between her lips as she put on her skirts, top and her jacket. she couldn't think about what's gonna be with her. there was always a place for a crawling, dancing girl who could dress up as a slut.
"hey, are you okay?"
turning around, it was the same two guy who tried to defend her. she couldn't blame them, she blamed the brad-kinda assholes. holding the cig with her hand now, she bit her lip.
"except that the fact that now i'm jobless, that my face hurts and got rearranged, i'm pretty good, thanks." they sat down beside her.
"we're sorry for what happened. but we beat them up."
"you were cool, too! with that broken bottle. i'm tommy, by the way, and he's nikki."
"i can talk myself too, tom."
"i'm y/n. and that's my job... well, was."
"sorry that we couldn't stop it." nikki looked at her. he had pretty, green eyes, not the ones she could see everyday.
"don't worry, it was just a matter of time. otherwise, if i have to handle those three, maybe i'd be in jail now. and i hate this shit", she added, tearing down the fake lashes.
"would you actually stab them?" tommy asked.
"of course. if they break the rules, i break them head." at that, the two of them looked each other. "what? you don't meet girls everyday who smash others for being a motherfucker?"
"no, most of my girlfriends cry and scream, or throw something at me." tommy shrugged his shoulders. "i'm gonna borrow some cigs, do y'all want some?"
"yes, please." y/n said, and nikki nodded, also. now, it was just the two of them. she turned to the guy.
"and you? any troubled girl?" he shook his head.
"not one yet. but an upcoming band, and it's gonna be fire."
"upcoming band? you drive in bands?"
"yeah. but the last one was shit, it was called london."
"bands with names of towns never work, didn't anybody tell you that before?" nikki laughed at her question. "well, now you know. and any plans about the new one?"
"it's gonna be... the best band you've ever seen. but i still need some members in it, now i only have tommy. so tell me, can you sing?"
it this the hand of fate? y/n was far too much played to believe in some guy's promises and questions.
"well, nobody wanted to beat me when i was carousing in my rent." laughing at this, nikki turned to her.
"maybe if you can really sing, i'll count a frontwoman into my band."
"frontwoman? don't joke with me." y/n shook her head at his words.
"why would i joke? why do you think it's a joke?"
"because i got fucked up by some people before, and i don't believe to empty promises. see, i'll go there, and if the band is cool, then i'm in."
tommy came back, handing the cigarettes to them, showing up a bottle alcohol.
"guys, i found this on the ground, it's only half empty!" he said, making y/n grimace.
"watch out, maybe it's piss. happens a lot of time." the two guy laughed again.
"were did you learn these comments?" tommy asked. y/n shrugged her shoulders, letting nikki light her cigarette.
"anywhere. i spent my childhood with people i learned a lot from."
"were you in orphanage?" nikki asked, and she nodded. another piece of ash falling to the ground.
"kinda. i grew up in sacramento, and getting out from it, i came here."
"that's fine. i sent my mother into jail, but she was an asshole anyway." nikki added, making y/n pull up her eyebrows, nodding approvingly.
"hard."
"do you wanna go to party? tommy?" the guy asked, tommy shook his head.
"sorry, but i gotta be home. i think that girl broke up with me, but anyway, it was nice to meet you, y/n."
"see you again, toms."
"how so?"
"your friend just invited me to sing in his upcoming band, the one that never anybody has seen before." she teased nikki.
"wow, that's cool! i thought we're gonna have a guy, but that's okay."
"can't i be as good as a guy?" she asked back, making tommy look at nikki. "whatever, it's only a trial."
as tommy got away, y/n finished her second cigarette. "it was a pleasure to meet you, nikki, but i gotta search for a new place to work."
"really?"
"why? until 4am, they're open. it's not a big deal."
"come and party with me instead of it. or just sit down and talk, hm?" the girl smiled at this, rolling her eyes.
"are you trying to fuck me? other guys just pay me the drinks and help me to get to the bathroom."
"no, i just wanna get to know more about you. you're probably not pure american, judging by your accent." nikki answered, helping her stand up. y/n looked at him.
"it's true that i'm a half-blood. half russian, half (y/na). every cop asks for my id, everybody thinks that i'm a fucking illegal immigrant, but i'm just as an american citizen as this fucking ford!" she said, pointing at the car beside them.
"fuck the police anyway. and... you said that you were a foster kid, how so?"
"i don't want to talk about it. besides, not everybody's choice to get their parents int jail."
the truth was that her mother was truly an illegal immigrant, and in the short half and a year she was in the states, she got pregnant with her from a fellow guy she met with. when y/n was born, her mother had a beautiful, lovely six months with her baby, but then, one day the police knocked on her door. having no father and living in a mother's home, it was an instant way to get into orphanage.
"i'm sorry about that. do you want to forget these things with some booze?" nikki asked as they turned down on the road.
"do you have an actual place to live?" she asked him.
"do you have a place to stay?" nikki asked back.
"hell yeah, just because i'm stated as a slut by the society, i'm not a homeless one!" y/n spread her arms beside them, almost slapping a guy. they both laughed at that. "lead me to your place."
"right away, princess." he replied, setting his arm around her shoulder. "can i?" nikki looked at her, y/n looked up to her from her real eyelashes.
"what?"
"people can think that we're going up to me to fuck." y/n laughed, shrugging her free shoulder.
"and do i look like i give a fuck about what they think?"
♡ 𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐊𝐈 ♡
y/n could be only one girl from all those who he met through the years, but she wasn't. he was unsure about that he really should invite her to the band, because if they really would get famous, everybody would bully her do death. and maybe she wouldn't get it on herself, but he would blow up from all the shit she'd get. looking at her, he only knew her a couple hours ago, but the way she protected herself from the creeps in the bar in underwear, the way she talked, she could be a pure ghetto chick, but she was more than that. it was like... she born into the wrong place, wanting to be more than she was now.
"is something bad? or are you just thinking?" she asked him.
"what? no, i just hope that i locked the windows before i started the night."
"i fancy the simple fact that you are a guy who is capable of thinking."
he wasn't a fan of fast and strong emotions, but if she doesn't stop replying sarcastically, he's gonna marry her.
it was just a matter of time...
...and tons of drugs, music and trouble.
𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓.
a/n: i gotta get into writing since i just got back, but i hope you still like it. if you want to get on the taglist, dm, comment or write here
take care and stay safe girliez
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blac-ivy · 2 months
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Twilight fandom is inarguably one of the biggest, most enduring fandoms, yet there is so little work written for it, which really surpises me.
Did anyone watch the riot club?
I hated thoses rich bastards but I need an x reader fic fix so BADDD.
Like the girlies who like Draco Malfoy, Ransom Drysdale, Lloyd Hansen and other rich asshole characters with little to no redeemable qualities y'all didn't eat it up like I did?
Y'all seen Max Irons in that movie? Douglas Booth? Sam Claflin? And you felt nothing.
Please I need a The Riot Club revival.
I know they suck majorly but I just do.
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ali-r3n · 2 years
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Nikki Sixx x Reader
While lounging by the pool, you and your husband Nikki Sixx get up to a little fun
A hint of smut 
This is my first time writing and posting this kind of story. 
Minors DNI
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Dressed in a red bikini, Y/N laid on her stomach. A towel between her revealed skin and the lounge chair. Her eyes were closed behind her giant sunglasses as she rested her cheek against her folded arms. 
She jumped with a squeak when a calloused hand came down on one of her ass cheeks. The impact made them jiggle.  
She looked over at the lounge next to her where her husband Nikki sat, a shit eating grin on his face. 
I should’ve known, she thought as she pushed her glasses down so that he could see her blank stare. 
“Sorry Babe,” he started in a voice that implied that he was anything but. “I couldn’t resist. You know how hard it is for me to keep my hands off of you.” 
He leaned in with a mischievous gleam in his gaze.
Y/N playfully rolled hers at him and reached down to grab the bottle of sunscreen from her bag. She gently tossed it at him before she pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. 
“Here, if you can’t keep them to yourself, at least make them useful.” 
Nikki. picked up the bottle with a grin. He moved to sit beside his wife on the lounge chair and uncapped it to squirt some of it into his palm. He placed the bottle down on his black jean clad lap and rubbed his hands together before he messaged it into her skin. 
Y/N let out a content sigh and a lazy smile spread on her face. 
“You like that, Baby?” 
“Mmmm, a little harder.”
She let out a groan when he applied more pressure. 
“Just like that, Nikki.”
She closed her eyes and laid her cheek back on her arms. 
One of his greased hands slid down her spine and underneath her bathing suit bottom. She blinked her eyelids open and looked over her shoulder at him.
“Nik, I don’t need sunscreen down there.”
He ran a finger over her lips which made her breath hitch and her body shudder. 
“Just act casual.” 
Y/N laid her temple on her arms and bit down on her bottom lip when he slipped a finger into her wet, willing body. A small noise slipped from her throat as she watched a smirk spread on his face.  
“Nikki,” she moaned, quietly. 
He gave her a wink. 
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Across the pool, Tommy reached over and smacked Vince’s chest to get the Singer’s attention. 
“Ow. What?”
The Drummer motioned to Nikki and his wife with his head. “Are they doing what I think they are doing?” 
Vince, Mick, and Tommy squinted over at the couple. 
“Yep,” Mick replied. “They’re doing what you think they are, Drummer.”
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axlsrxses · 2 years
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𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐈𝐗𝐗, nikki six
pairing: nikki sixx (the dirt) x juliet roth (fem!oc)
requested: yes/no
synopsis: in which juliet can’t stand to watch nikki destroy himself and his friendships with the band.
warnings: a lot of angst, break up, mentions of drugs & alcohol, tommy lee, drug addiction, toxic relationship.
word count: 1.19k
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𝗦𝗣𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝟭𝟵𝟴𝟲
today was finally the day that tommy lee was getting married for the second time. despite having only known heather for a year, he was adamant that she was the one for him, even if the others didn’t think so.
and even though the band were known for their outrageous behaviour and unruly addictions to alcohol and other dangerous substances, this should’ve been the perfect day for all of them but it wasnt…not at all.
you see, nikki was going through a hard time and no one knew how to help him, not even his own fiancée. juliet had tried for years to get him sober and help him find stability in the crazy world of fame that surrounded the band but every time she seemed to be making some sort of success, things would explode in her face and the man she loved would fall back down.
“fuck you, nik!” tommy abruptly spat, storming out of the room and slamming the door behind him.
“now you’ve done it.” mick sighed, shaking his head as he looked up at his intoxicated band mate. “sort yourself out dude.”
standing up from her seat, juliet carefully smoothed out her dress before making her way towards the now open door that both mick and tommy had left through. of course part of her wanted to stay here and help nikki deal with whatever he was going through but she had made a promise to be heather’s maid of honour and she wasn’t going to let anything stop that.
“take it you’re siding with tommy again?” nikki scoffed, slurring his words as he opened her another bottle of beer. “how typical of you.”
“actually i’m keeping a promise to my friend.” juliet retorted, crossing her arms as she turned back to the man she didn’t recognise anymore. “unlike how you promised tommy you would be sober for this.”
instead of saying another word, nikki scoffed once more before downing the bitter beverage in his hand. he hated what he had become, he hated how he let his childhood memories get the best of him, and he hated how the drugs affected his relationships with not only his best friends but also the love of his life.
“i say this in the nicest way, nik, but mick’s right.” juliet sighed, running her hands through her long blonde hair. “you need to get some help.”
“you’re all the fucking same.” nikki mumbled almost incoherently, flopping down onto the couch behind him. “just get some fucking help, nikki.”
rolling her eyes at her fiancé’s behaviour, juliet turned back to face him with a disappointed look on her face. their relationship had been a fairytale from the moment they locked eyes across a crowded restaurant but it seemed like this story wouldn’t have a happy ending, especially not with the route nikki was taking.
“why are you still here?” nikki questioned, titling his head to the side as he examined the look across juliet’s face. “you’re making it clear that you don’t need to hear my side.”
“when did i ever say that?” juliet sighed, taking a deep breath to compose herself as she noticed nikki’s hands start to shake, most likely from the lack of drugs now in his system. “something has caused this and no matter how hard any of us try to talk to you about what is happening, you either push up away or scream profanities at us until we leave!”
“i have no idea what you just said.” nikki chuckled, throwing his head back against the sofa.
“of course you don’t.” juliet mumbled, shaking her head sadly and turning back around to face the door.
days where nikki would refrain from using any drugs were normally the worst for juliet. his mood would completely shift from one extreme to another and no matter how hard you would try to speak some sense into him, his brain would completely shut off until he was ready to scream or argue once again.
rehab was something the band and juliet had looked into for months. none of them wanted to watch someone they cared for drug and drink themselves to death but nikki wouldn’t listen. he had his own money and when you were wealthy, people would do anything you said…even if that meant releasing him from rehab too early for his recovery to even begin.
“jules, wait.” nikki spoke loudly, jumping up from the couch and swaying slightly before he managed to compose himself. “you look beautiful.”
“just go home, nik.” juliet spoke softly, squeezing the bridge of her nose as she felt a headache slowly starting to form. “don’t ruin this day for tommy.”
“ruin it? you really think i’d do that to my best fucking friend?!” nikki retorted, his voice raising as he began to grow frustrated with juliet.
juliet didn’t have the effort to fight anymore. she wanted to see nikki get better but she knew he was more likely to die before that would ever happen and she couldn’t bring herself to stick around and wait for that day to happen. she knew what she had to do.
“i can’t do this shit anymore.” juliet mumbled, feeling her eyes brimming with tears that threatened to spill.
“what are you talking about?” nikki questioned, tilting his head as he looked at the shorter girl. “we’re getting married next month.”
“not anymore.” juliet sighed, sliding the ring from her finger and placing it on the bar behind her. “i’m not marrying you just to get a call a few days later from the morgue telling me to come and look at your body.”
not knowing how to react, nikki flipped the glass table beside him, shattering it completely and sending small shards through the air. maybe he should’ve reacted to juliet’s decision a little better but what else could he do? he had completely fucked up and now the one person who had ever truly loved and cared for him was now giving up.
juliet flinched at the sight before her as she let out a quiet gasp. she knew first hand that nikki had a bad temper, especially when he was itching to get some more drugs into his system as a way to relax, but she was expecting him to take her decision a little bit better or even understand where she was coming from.
“so you’re just giving up on us, on me?” nikki asked, his voice breaking slightly as he slurred.
“just get some help.” juliet begged, taking a deep breath as she tried her best to stay composed. “i love you more than you’ll know but i can’t stand see you doing this to yourself.”
letting out a loud scoff, nikki made his way towards the petite girl, his face scrunched angrily as he replayed the words juliet had spoken to him since tommy’s outburst. maybe he knew he was in the wrong, maybe he had no idea what was happening but he knew that whatever was happening between them was something he couldn’t control anymore.
“why don’t you just walk out that fucking door if you can’t stand to see me this way?!” nikki spat, pushing juliet’s head to face towards the door. “go find some other rockstar to fuck like you always do!”
a loud slap echoed through the air as nikki’s head flew to the side. juliet wasn’t entirely sure what had come over her but hearing nikki use something entirely not true against her just made something shift inside her.
“fuck you, sixx!” juliet snapped, storming out of the room and slamming the door behind her.
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teddypickerry · 11 months
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nikki sixx (himself or douglas booth! nikki) x reader
Could you do one where the reader happens to also be a bassist and they’re both in Crüe, they’ve been close friends for a while and Mick notices that they’ve developed a close relationship and he has a talk with Nikki since Mick is like a older brother to the reader. Meanwhile Tommy attempts to flirt with the reader trying to push Nikki to confess.
Pretty much a cute fluff imagine :)
𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐌.
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pairings — nikki sixx x fem! band member reader (also reader x tommy kinda)
word count — 919
warnings — just cursing & suggestive dialogue (it’s mötley mf)
a/n — lowkey disappeared off this app for a month just to come back with a shitty fic. anyways, writing as mick is so fucking fun.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" A common phrase heard by each and every member of Mötley Crüe. When Mick Mars so suddenly spoke it to the bassist, who was currently stuffing his face with pasta. "Eating?" Nikki had asked hesitantly, confused why Mick was stood in his dressing room with a bottle of something strong. It definitely wasn't lemonade. "No, that's not what I mean."
"Well, you asked," Nikki scoffed at the guitarist's words while Mick pulled up and a chair to the couch. Nikki was alone in his dressing room, for the first time in forever. No groupies, no girls. Which was different for the bassist... practically against his religion. "What the hell are you doing with Y/N?"
Oh. That was enough to make the bassist choke on his food as he threw the bowl to the couch, swallowing down the food with a swig of Jack Daniels. He finally coughed and calmed down. Mick was still staring at him like he'd just walked into Nikki banging his daughter. "She's my friend, she's your friend. Fucking whatever."
"Shitty excuse," Mick scoffed as he sat back in the chair and took another comfortable sip. He wasn't giving up anytime soon, which was obvious by his body language. "God, what do you want, Mars?"
"Stop being a little fucker and ask the girl out already. I shouldn't have to tell you how to do every fucking thing, Sixx." Mick scoffed making Nikki roll his eyes, trying to keep his tough-guy demeanor. "And, don't fuck it up. She's special, she's our bandmate. And she's beautiful, graceful, and she'll punch you in the face. So, don't be a jackass."
"Nice talk," Nikki commented as he stood up and began to hairspray his hair in the mirror in preparation for their show later that night. Mick's words stuck in Nikki like heroin. He started thinking about them and he knew he was right. He had to face his feelings and get it out of his system. It wasn't that easy, you were a member of the band. You weren't some chick. A disastrous relationship would lead to the end of the band. The band you'd all worked your asses off to create.
"I didn't mean do it eventually, I meant now. Before Tommy fucks her in the back alley," Mick added making Nikki turn to him in horror. The sleazy drummer had a way of stealing Nikki's girls, vice versa. It was an ongoing game between the two, a pretty girl equals one of them getting her. But this time... Nikki would bet his life on this round.
The bassist bolted out of his dressing room and past the millions of randos backstage. His feet carried him down the hall toward the stage, where he knew everyone was setting up for rehearsal. Specially where he heard the sound of your laugh and the sound of drumsticks falling to the ground. That was a pretty easy trail to his best friends. Which did in fact lead to the drummer twirling his sticks in his fingers, you stood prepping your own bass with a smile.
"You've got a great smile," Tommy grinned with his typical cocky look. You'd known Tommy for years on end and his innocent flirting never stopped. It also never bothered you, as it was all you knew from the bastard drummer. But over the past few months, Nikki seemed to bite back a glare anytime he heard it from either Vince or Tommy. "I mean it, really."
"Thanks, T-Bone," You flashed him your small grin before going back in with another pack of pics. You tested out a quick riff for the sound crew as Nikki simply stood there, finally erupting from the shadows. Tommy took this as an invitation — knowing he could get Sixx all hot and bothered with a few simple words. He twisted the drumsticks with his fingers as he glanced between you and Nikki. His eyes landed on you. "You think you could do this?"
"I mean it's not rocket science," You mocked while taking the bass off and sitting it against a chair. "Well I'm pretty good at it, I'm pretty good with my fingers. Wanna find out more?" Tommy so obviously flirted making you laugh as you playfully tapped Nikki's arm. Nikki just gave Tommy a harsh look at this, that didn't exactly match your grin. "Yeah, okay, T-Bone. I bet you are."
"So good, you can find out if you want," He winked with that goofy smile of his. The one that made you shake your head as Nikki subconsciously stepped closer to you and crossed his arms. "Yeah, she's not into that." Nikki was quick to say making both sets of eyes look over at him. Tommy held a proud smile at this, "Are you saying she's into you though?"
"What if I did?" Nikki cocked like he owned the place. Your eyes darted between the two for a moment before stepping up. "Will you two shut the hell up and start rehearsing?"
"Yes ma'am," Nikki nodded while Tommy shot you an army 'yes sir' nod. The drummer walked off to his setup leaving you and the bassist to your lonesome. Nikki seemed to glance around before his eyes fell back on you. "So..."
"Let's have dinner tomorrow," You spoke before he had a chance to process it, and walked away. He watched you walk away with a smile. Knowing he had actually won.
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theascent · 10 months
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☼☾ ( douglas booth , 28 , he/him , cisgender man , schellenberg 4 ) - have you seen MATTEO SCHELLENBERG?  we’ve heard through the grapevine that they’re IMAGINATIVE but also DUPLICITOUS. when you think of them , you think of INK STAINED FINGERTIPS, WARMED FROM THE FLAME OF A NEARBY FIRE, DARK LASHES CONCEALING AN EVEN DARKER, MORE DISINGENUOUS GLINT, and FLOWERY PROMISES WHISPERED AGAINST THE COLUMN OF YOUR THROAT.
⊱⋅•⋅ full navigation
b a s i c s
name: matteo schellenberg title: lord; second youngest of the schellenbergs birthdate: july 9; currently 28 pronouns: he/him gender: cisgender man nation: liechtenstein orientation: bisexual/biromantic
more information, particularly regarding interests and personality, available through the navigation link above.
b a c k g r o u n d
1800s 07 August My Dearest Brother,
I have sent yet another bundle of masala chai, you would do well to savor the leaves as my monthly shipments will soon cease. I’ve never considered myself to be in possession of much luck, and I’m aware of the irony of such a statement given the current circumstances that have befallen our family, but ha! I knew a rainy day would soon arrive, and oh how gloomy this year has been. I have just enough saved to purchase a ticket back home. Seeing as Silas has all but ruined our reputation… I suppose it’s best I spare you the distress of bearing this situation alone and say that…well, I intend to be back in Liechtenstein before Silas has the chance to bleed us dry of every krone in his sight.
We are both aware of the trouble our brother’s desires have got him in, and if we desire to have the bastard outested by the end of the year, you will be in need of all the help you can get. And before you choose to scold me - I can nearly see your quill poised over your reply, even from my accommodations here in Mumbai - I evoke the term bastard with all the adoration in the world for my dearest elder brother.
Even if his penchant for parties and whores have all but rendered the last six years of my life abroad useless …
Once you’re instated as Duke Schellenberg, I expect proper compensation for my efforts. My generosity, as you well know, is not given for free. I understand funds will remain short, so perhaps I will accept an alternative form of payment. 
Ah, and do you still see the publisher’s nephew on occasion? It is…of supreme importance that you give him the letter I posted from Spain. For a man that claims to have his hands full, he is quite adamant about a mere chapter….do give him the letter, yes? He says it is not potential I have, but a ‘natural genius for capturing the very essence of life in mere words’ – his words, not mine. You know I’m not one to brag. Well, not often, at least. But can you believe it? Your brother, the author. Perhaps I will end up like Rousseau or Austen?
 I must return back to bed before the flame burns through the last of the wick. Give my best to Silas and the others, or do not. I don’t particularly care. Yours Truly, MS
p u r p o s e + h c s
matteo's purpose for being in france can be summarized into one simple word: autonomy. being fourth in line for the dukedom meant his ambitions were his alone, not forced upon him in the name of familial duty. matteo dreams of becoming of famous author; this is what led him to spend his early twenties traversing the world in hopes of drawing inspiration for his debut novel.
unfortunately his plans came to a staggering halt when the news of his family's sudden financial misfortune forced him to return home.
but it's not revenge that brought him to france, it's riches. titled misses and misters wander the hallways and frolic in the gardens and it's just so easy. matteo is a master of words, and he intends to use them to his advantage, bewitching his way into the upper echelon. into wealth. with fortune comes the funds to achieve his dream, and he's prepared to swindle and use anyone it takes - even if it means subjugating himself to a loveless marriage.
those with humble origins become pawns; the hands that caress supple skin prompt shaking, pointed fingers of blame. blackmail. the lips that offer declarations of fondness elicit the slightest whisper of a name. a victim. handmaids and stable boys become his closest confidantes, but the ball is forever in his court.
to those who don't know him (which, admittedly, is most considering he's been traveling for years), he appears to be just another rake. easygoing and unserious. he prefers this; it allows him to move through society unbothered. late night rendezvous lead to diamonds and watches sitting heavily in the bottom of his pockets.
matteo craves glory. if he can't secure enough funds to support his past lifestyle, he is sure that all his hard work will be for nothing. writing has always been his outlet, but liechtenstein doesn't offer the same inspiration that the high seas and spice markets do.
and i have some wanted connections in the navigation! message me on discord or tumblr if you'd like to plot something !
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monstraduplicia · 11 months
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absolution
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i never post my writing on here but i was compelled to make a little thing based on the lead character's from my partner @emiliosandozsequence 's book Sparrow (more info here)
Father Cesare Sparrow hears his twin sister Loa's confession, but absolving her proves more difficult than planned ...
warnings: nsfw, incest, parental abuse, and mention of past SA
Cesare Sparrow was expected to sit in confession every first and third week of the month. If one was to do statistical analysis on the Sparrow family’s parishioners and their confessional habits, one would note that Cesare listened to four times as many confessions as that of his father, Father Douglas. Children, especially, seemed to trust the younger priest, opening up to him what they would never say to the elder.
It was difficult to hear the ills that befell the younger generation day in and day out, but Cesare never complained. He had never followed in his father’s place for God, but to help others. If lending his ear and occasionally giving advice to confused, hurt, or those wrongfully ashamed was the only aid he could give them, then it was his duty to do so.
More frequently than anyone else, the confessional booth was occupied by Loa,
Whereas Cesare tried to ease the weight of burdens, his twin sister compulsively carried them. The need to blame herself for any error and any wrongness had become pathological. If it rained, she punished herself. If she forgot a word during her prayers, she punished herself. If she felt anything that wasn’t explicitly good and virtuous, she punished herself.
Cesare did not have to look through the heavily latticed partition between them to know it was her that had slipped into his booth. Though the confessional was purposefully dark, he had caught a flash of pale, flush cheeks through the dark river of her hair and knew instantly who the stranger was. He would know her blind, able to recognize her from the sound of breath alone. Cesare had no sooner identified her than he was turning away, forcing himself to look straight ahead at the ancient oak booth wall. Sister or not, this was a holy place, and he had to try not to show her favor within God’s House.
“Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned,” Loa whispered as she crossed herself, her voice so quiet and wavering that Cesare had to strain to hear it. He could hear her nervously fiddling with her crucifix and on instinct his own hand went to his chest to feel the rosary that laid beneath his clothes. It had been a gift from Loa, and never once had he wrapped the beaded cord around his fingers without imagining it was a handful of her deep umber hair instead. “It has been … four- five days since my last confession.”
Loa began to stammer then, half-formed words nervously spilling from her lips as she continued to fiddle with her crucifix. Cesare didn’t have to peek through the partition to know how she looked. Her knees would be close together, but her feet would be splayed out. Her shoulders would be drooped, as if she was trying to disappear into herself. She had never quite evolved from the posture of childhood, and even at twenty-six she seemed suspended in pre-maturity.
“Loa,” Cesare said, and immediately cursed himself for breaking. His nerves were acting up, already anticipating what Loa had to confess. Since they had been young children, her sins had always been ones she wrongfully attributed to herself. She could never understand the sins were their father’s, not hers. That he should feel the guilt and shame that lived within her like cancer. Mouth drier than bone, Cesare swallowed thickly. He didn’t like this. He didn’t like that Loa felt compelled to call him Father. He didn’t like having to listen to her tales of torture.
But he was her witness. It was his birthright.
“My child,” He said, speaking to her as he would any other. “You are safe here. There is no ear but mine and God’s. Judgment is not my purpose, and our Lord is forever merciful.” His hands grasped at the fabric of his pants, clutching tight as if to find the strength to go on. More than anything Cesare wanted to look over at his sister, see her wide eyes staring back at him. But he couldn’t, too afraid of losing his resolve.
In his periphery he saw Loa nod, heard her own gulping swallow. “I have been neglectful with my chores. A few days ago I wore a dress that needs rehemming, knowing my father would be angry with me. I wanted him to be angry with me, and when he slapped me for it I was glad. That’s- That’s terrible, isn’t it? To seek punishment?”
Cesare inhaled sharply, wincing as memories of their shared childhood flashed in his mind. He knew how Loa felt. He had broken the rules more often than he could count, always aware in the back of his mind that Father would find out and he would be swiftly punished. Douglas Sparrow only paid his eldest children mind when they acted out, and so the twins growled for attention however they could. Raised in pain, they found the same comfort from a beating as any other child would find in a loving embrace. “I don’t think that’s a sin,” Cesare managed to say, but his voice was strained, forced.
Loa sighed then, and for several moments did not speak. The air in the confessional booth was thick and hot thanks to the Louisiana summer and Cesare felt suffocated by that and the oppressive silence. Still, the quiet went on until Loa finally seemed to snap, her following words a quiet gasp.
“I feel lust.”
Cesare’s heart stopped. His mind raced. HIs skin broke out in sweat. Though ordained, he was far from celibate, and lust was something he knew better than the devil, but Loa was different. Intimacy, romance, sex, none of it existed to her. She had never experienced awkward first date kissing or clumsy back-seat fumblings or honest love making. She only knew what her father did to her. She only knew what her father made Cesare and other men do to her. He had always expected that such violence would have made her incapable of wanting, just as it had made Cesare incapable of loving. To hear differently shocked him, but before he could speak Loa was interjecting.
“I know I shouldn’t. I know it's wrong and that what- what Father does is meant to cleanse me, but I can’t make it stop. When I’m alone, its like this weight pressing down on me, a need I can’t escape no matter how many times I try to distract myself. I don’t know what to do, Cesare. How do I make it go away?”
It was the soft, whimpering Cesare that turned his insides into warm honey. Loa sounded so lost and so afraid, and Cesare needed to help her. He needed to do whatever he could to lessen that heavy burden.
“Do you ever touch yourself?” He asked, though he was surprised he managed to say the words at all. His hand returned to his chest, feeling once more for the rosary. He knew he should shut up, knew he should leave the confessional and go anywhere but where he was. He knew he should know his place, like Douglas always said, but he couldn’t stop himself now that he had began.
Loa was quiet again, and Cesare could sense her nervousness through the partition. “No. Not since we were kids and you would touch me,” She whispered.
Ceasare remembered that. They had been young and confused and trying to cope with the things their father did to Loa and made Cesare watch. She would crawl into his bed, crying and hot and begging to help. She said it hurt between her legs, that she couldn’t sleep because of the ache.
Cesare had only tried to help. He had only put his hand between her legs and felt the wet, warm flesh waiting for him beneath her nightgown. He had only gripped her there until Loa had stopped moving and fallen into deep sleep at his side.
They stopped this habit when they realized what it was, what it meant. Never had they spoken about it since. Until now.
Cesare glanced down at the bulge in his pants and crossed himself, his stomach twisted in knots to the point of pain. “I don’t mean that,” He said, and used all his will to keep his voice quiet. He was trembling, he realized as he ran a hand through his dark hair. He was falling apart. But his voice never once cracked. He couldn’t have Loa know what she did to him, his own weakness too shameful. “I mean … by yourself. Do you ever touch yourself?”
“No,” Loa said again, and a soft, embarrassed laugh that reminded Cesare of windchimes burst from her lips. “I don’t know how. It seems … Oh, it seems so silly. What if someone found out?”
It was a good enough reason not to. Their home was sizable, but their father’s eyes seemed to be everywhere, as if the walls and doors and windows were simply extensions of the Sparrow patriarch. Any sin committed under his roof would become known, undoubtedly.
But not here. This was God’s house.
“There’s no one here but myself and the Lord,” Cesare said, and finally turned to look at his twin. Shockingly, two brilliant brown eyes were already staring at him. Their gazes met through the partition, leaving Cesare breathless. “I can tell you what to do,” He whispered, feeling terrified. They were crossing a line that Cesare could not define, but knew innately. He felt as if any moment the doors of the confessional booth would fling open and their father would appear, ready to strike.
Loa only stared for several seconds before finally nodding, her expression unsure, but trusting. “Please, Cesare. It hurts.”
Cesare’s eyes fell shut, suddenly a child again in bed with his twin. When he opened his eyes, however, all he saw was the beautiful woman that frightened little girl had grown into. “Spread your legs and take off your panties,” Cesare instructed, knowing his sister would be wearing a dress. She wore nothing else, even in the dead of winter. His eyes widened as he watched Loa do as she was told by pulling up her skirt just enough to slip the white cotton panties down her legs. Her skirt was bunched around her waist, covering just enough that Cesare couldn’t look between her legs. He thanked God for that mercy.
“Think about who you want to be with. Think about them beside you, touching you. Are they warm? Are their hands soft? Do they kiss you?” Cesare found it harder to speak the more he went on, but it wasn’t from arousal. It was jealousy. Only now did he realize that for Loa to feel lust, that meant she must want to bed down with someone, and that someone could never be him. Jaw set tight, Cesare tried not to think of another beside Loa, his hands caressing her skin and his lips on hers. It set a fire within Cesare unlike any other. She was his twin. They had been born together. They had laid together at their father’s behest. One day, they would die together. How dare any man attempt to sever the invisible tether between them?
“Oh,” Loa gasped, and Cesare’s thoughts vanished into thin air. She had leaned back against the booth’s wall, her legs spread wide and her eyes shut tight. One hand was in her lap, but the other was on her chest, cupping her breast through her shirt. Cesare had thought he had known lust from what he had seen his father do to Loa or what he, himself had done to her, but now he realized he knew nothing. Because he had never seen anyone look as blissful as Loa looked now.
“When you’re ready,” Cesare said, though he was amazed he was even capable of speech with how heavy his heart was pounding and how violently his hands were trembling. “Put your hand between your legs.”
Loa nodded obediently and eagerly slipped her hand beneath her thighs. She bit her lip, her brows knotting together as if frustrated. “Its- Its wet,” She panted, making Cesare nearly weep.
“Its supposed to be,” He said, and winced at the sudden pain. He was achingly hard, but he couldn’t touch himself, he couldn’t give himself relief. Spilling his seed would be a step too far. “Now, take your finger inside yourself. Then out, then back again. Pretend its him, feel him fill you over and over again.”
Loa’s free hand clamped over her mouth as she did as instructed, but a muffled moan could still be heard. Her hips had begun moving back and forth, fucking herself with her hand as her entire body squirmed for relief. She was panting, her chest bobbing every time she arched her back to reach deeper inside herself. She was falling apart, and Cesare was her witness through it all. “My God,” Loa moaned, beginning the act of Contrition as her hips bucked back and forth. “I am sorry for my sins with all my heart. In- In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good, I have sinned against You whom I … whom I should love above all things. I firmly … intend, with Y-Your help, to do penance, to sin? To sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin. Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered and died for me. For us. In his name, my God- my God, have mercy!”
Soft, mewling whimpers were escaping Loa and Cesare feared being overheard. If not by someone outside the booth, then by God. “You have to be quiet, Lo,” He gasped, an edge of fear in his voice. “He’ll hear.”
As if it was his words that did the trick, Loa let out a sharp gasp before her entire body went rigid and then melted as she shuddered against her fingers. Her hand fell from her lips as she struggled to catch her breath, swaying in her seat as her hand continued to work herself as her orgasm undoubtedly rocked through her body.
When it was finally over, when she pulled her hand away to reveal three fingers slicked pearlescent and dripping, Cesare noticed the smile on her face. She looked satisfied and happy, as if that unbearable weight had finally lifted. Cesare had helped Loa, and in doing so had absolved her. In absolving her, he had atoned for the countless nights of pain he had put her through. “God, the Father of mercies,” Cesare began, reciting the words by heart. “Through the death and the resurrection of His Son has reconciled the world to Himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Make the sign of the cross and close with Amen.”
Loa pulled down her skirt and cleaned her hand on the fabric. She straightened her shoulders and looked at Cesare through the partition, though her gaze did not meet his. “Thank you, Father,” She said, and crossed herself before slipping out of the booth as gracefully as she had entered.
His heart still beating heavy enough to ache, Cesare's mind began to wander. He recalled times he had walked into Loa's bedroom without knocking and found her flush-faced and smiling that same smile he had just seen. He recalled nights he had been suspended in that twilight between sleep and wakefulness, when he had heard curious moaning through the wall and passed it off as the plumbing before drifting back into sleep. Only now did he see those memories in hindsight and a pit began to form in his stomach.
Loa had known perfectly well how to give herself pleasure.
She hadn't needed him to teach her anything at all.
After, when Cesare had calmed enough to stand without fearing that his legs would give out, he left his side of the booth and went to the other. There waiting for him like a holy relic was Loa’s panties. Now up close, Cesare could see they were badly damp.
She had been wet long before he instructed her to remove them.
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likeadevils · 9 months
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I KNOW PLACES IS ABOUT SNAPCHAT GUY?!?!????? Wow. I always assumed she wasn't writing about anyone else(except wildest dreams but that was somewhat a hookup song) because she was somewhat heartbroken over harry. But the evan Spiegel also makes perfect sense because her and harry didn't exactly hide during their relationship (situationship is another story). Does he have green eyes too?? Also wasn't Douglas Booth around this time too? Are there anything about him? Is there any commonly harry-accepted(or any muse accepted) songs that turned out to be about someone else?
i mean i don’t know (i’m just a guy) and like. i think he has light brown eyes? so it’s not a perfect fit but the timing of having a secret relationship fall apart once it became public, and then the douglas booth thing of chilling with a guy and having his pr team viciously attack you is like. very i know places vibes yknow? i don’t think they’re necessarily about them— i trust taylor when she said she was imagining a relationship that could work rather than it being about a real relationship (and she was still in a mood of like. when she was imagining a muse for a song the imagined muse was harry)
so those are my very long rants about i know places— the muse stuff is a bit more nebulous. i really ended up assigning more songs to harry (treacherous and parts of ikywt are probably the biggest) than i took away from him. i guess you all over me isn’t about joe jonas? there’s demos circulating from like, 2005 so that’s just a mathematical impossibility
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michelle-is-writing · 11 months
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Left behind ch.1, Nikki Sixx
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Word Count: 1.1k~
TW!: mention of drug and alcohol use, angst
People know drugs are bad for you; that’s obvious. What isn’t obvious is the fact that drugs hurt not only the person who’s taking them but the people close to them as well. Combine them with an addiction to alcohol, and you’re in for an absolute shit show.
When I met Nikki at one of his first-ever shows, I knew he was something special. Not just because he was an upcoming rockstar but because I could tell there was something about him that made me feel like I was flying. When his eyes met mine later on at the bar, I could tell I was in for trouble, but at the time, it was the good kind of trouble. The trouble that sends you in over your head with your heart beating like a racehorse in your chest as you soar through the sky.
However, I should’ve remembered that everything that goes up must come down because, after a while, I came crashing to the ground. A relationship that I truly thought would turn into a marriage became a train wreck, and I found myself holding onto the remains of what once was. The words “Two against the world” were often used by Nikki when he felt especially romantic, but now, they held no meaning.
Anytime they had a tour, I always went with them, and at first, it was fun. When parties were going on and Motley Crue attended, we never stopped laughing. Nikki and I would always stay close with his arm wrapped around my waist and my body pushed against his side. Oftentimes, we’d happen to look at each other, and a bright smile would fill our faces as if we were so happy just to see each other. Then, it was like one day, that changed. Nikki didn’t want me going to parties with him, and he stopped holding me any chance he got. It was as if he didn’t want anything to do with me.
Weeks passed, and I watched Nikki grow worse and worse every day. I knew he was doing drugs, but he didn’t want to talk about it. He knew how I felt about it too, so before I could say anything else, he either walked away or changed the subject entirely. I felt like I was losing him, and I tried to do something about it. It didn’t work, however. Instead, it showed me that I was wrong; I wasn’t losing him - I had already lost him.
“Why do you always do this? As soon as I get off stage, you wanna start shit!” Nikki yelled as I stood a few feet away from him backstage, my arms crossed against my chest. “What is it with you lately?! You’re always in a mood lately.”
“I’m in a mood?” I asked him, rolling my eyes as Nikki threw himself down onto the backstage room’s couch. “What about you? All you ever do is drink and get high!” Walking around the couch to face him, I looked at him with nothing but anger. “You weren’t always like this, Nikki! You used to be sweet and happy; you were never this cruel,” sitting down on the coffee table in front of him, I watched as he stared at me with an unchanging face. “What happened?”
As soon as my question left my lips, Nikki sat up straight. “You,” he answered me, his tone dark and unwavering. “You’re what happened.”
All I could do was stare at him in absolute confusion. That wasn’t my Nikki; he would never say that to me. He was always positive and loving; the only times he had ever gotten mean were the times he was teasing me, and we would playfully go back and forth. This, however, was something different.
“What the hell are you talking about, Nikki?” I asked him, my anger forming a pit in my stomach. "Why would you even say something like that? You-"
“Because it’s the truth!” Nikki swiftly cut me off, jumping up from his seat with a sudden vigor. “No matter what I do, you’re always putting me down! I’m tired of this shit!” With every word, Nikki accentuates himself by holding his arms out. “I don’t want to see you anymore! F-Fuck all these years, it’s over!”
Those words rang in my head over and over again as I slowly began to pick myself up and gather my stuff. Nikki only stared as I did so, not saying anything more. “It’s over!” I could hear Nikki say as I neared the door, but it was only in my mind as Nikki remained silent. The only noise in the room came from me opening the door, turning to give Nikki one more once-over before I left, not knowing where I’d go. “Nikki,” I started, his eyes lingering on mine as they welled with tears. “I hope… I hope you’re happy.”
With that, I walked out with all of my belongings from the past five years, almost too much for me to carry. Heading to the ticket station for a bus back to LA, I try my hardest to blink away my tears, but I fail as the people passing me on the sidewalk give me strange glares. I can’t help but be upset. I’m leaving behind all that I’ve known for the last several years, and I’m still not sure what I’m going to do. Besides, I didn’t even get to tell Nikki I had some news for him, but then again, if I drag him down as much as he says I do, then a child certainly isn’t going to help that.
Just the thought of raising the current life inside my womb makes me want to stop and sob, but the thought of doing it all on my own makes it even worse. However, I have to do what’s best for my child, and having a heroin-addicted father isn’t what’s best. When Nikki gets clean (if he does), that’s when he can come back into our lives. I wish I could be there for him to help him get clean, but at this point, I think he’s beyond my help. In a moment where I need him, he needs something stronger than me.
Read Chapter 2 here!
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oskea93 · 2 months
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Keep it to Yourself (3 - Part one)
✶ DouglasBooth!Nikki Sixx x OC ✶
Warning: Cursing, physical violence A/N: Hey guys! So, this is kind of just a filler chapter that goes along with the last chapter. I promise things are gonna kick up soon and you'll get to see how everything goes down once Bryant is with Nikki 24/7. I just want to also say thank you to everyone that has been reading! You guys are amazing and I appreciate the love so much!!
Taglist: @fancywasmyname1, @kaitieskidmore1, @xxisxxisxxis, @sparxx27,  @cruecifymesixx, @tempt-ress, @a-sia-san, @x-xinenas, @casualcomputerarbiter-blog​, @makaelahdelvalle
“Okay, well thanks for checking.”
I watched as Doc hung up the phone, his hand moving down his face in exhaustion. That was the fourth person he had called and there was still no sign of Nikki. “Haven’t seen him.” He muttered as he started to pace. “I don’t know who else to call or even know where to look. He could be halfway out of California right now for all I know.”
The party quickly died out after Nikki and I’s explosive reunion. Nobody was really in the mood to party anymore after having to dodge glass bottles and whatever else Nikki could get his hands on.
“I doubt he went very far –“ I started. “He’s high off his ass, Doc. He probably went back to his house to get even more loaded.” Doc shook his head. “You knew this was going to happen – You and I both knew he wouldn’t react well to seeing me.”
“Well, I thought he would have a change of heart.” He rushed. “The bastard hasn’t seen you in a few years – he was fucking infatuated with you – he fucking loved you.”
“She left his ass standing on the stoop outside of his house, Doc.” Vince interjected. “Would you be happy to see the woman that left you the way she left him? He was a fucking wreck because of Bryant – You think this time is going to be any different?”
I turned to look at the blonde, “Everyone forgets the fact that he’d been cheating for months.” Our eyes locked. “But yet I’m the asshole because I stood up for myself and left. I guess I should’ve been like the whores you get with that’ll stay no matter how many women you’re fucking.”
He puckered his lips, earning a laugh from the bimbo attached to his side.
Vince and I never had the type of friendship that I had with Mick and Tommy. We tolerated each other and that was it. I was there the day he showed up to Nikki’s apartment.  His girlfriend led the way into the living room – the arrogance flowing from her like a cheap perfume. She was your typical rich girl from the Valley, who was basically just with Vince to piss off her parents. She bought that son of a bitch anything he wanted – spending thousands of her parent’s money on the man. I guess the coke they spent so much time snorting damaged not only her brain cells but also her judgement.
I rolled my eyes in disgust before removing myself from the couch. Doc had retreated to the backyard, a portable phone pressed against his ear as he walked along the pools edge. I decided that this was my que to leave – taking matters into my own hands. I knew of some places that Nikki frequented when we were together. If he wasn’t at his house, then I would try those places. Unlucky for Doc, he was notorious for leaving his car keys in the ignition – easy access for anyone that wanted to take it. I threw my purse into the passenger seat before climbing in and starting the engine. I tore out of Vince’s driveway – speeding onto the freeway as the warm, night air whipped through my hair.
“You think this is okay – You look like you’re ten seconds away from the fucking grim reaper coming for your ass!” He rolled his eyes as he paced the kitchen – his fists balled up at his sides. “Doc called me and ask-“
“You fucking called her?” His eyes wild as he stared Doc down. “You fucking called her!”
“I had no other choice, Nikki.” Doc was terrified. “You’re getting worse every day and you won’t listen to anyone at this point. I had no other person to turn too - She’s your wife, Nikki.”
“Ex-wife.” Nikki and I spoke at the same time.
Doc let out a sigh, “Wife, ex-wife – It’s all the fucking same. You two were married – you were madly in love with each other. Yeah, it ended badly but I know for a fucking fact that Bryant still cares enough about you to not want to see you like this.”
I kept my eyes on Nikki, “If he wants to kill himself with a needle then that’s his fucking choice.”
“What!?” I winced as Doc grabbed onto my arm. “What’re you saying, Bryant?”
Nikki and I stared at each other – he was still fucked up, but I could see the hatred and emotion coursing through his green eyes. “Nikki’s a grown man, Doc. A grown man that’s acting like a little bitch because of all the trauma that’s fucked up his life. He thinks that a needle filled with a feel-good drug is gonna help his pathetic ass – then let him think that. Who am I to say anything – It’s not like I wasn’t there when the real creative juices were flowing – when Motley was at the top of their game. Nikki’s choice is to be a junky – a fucking junky who’s never gonna reach the top – just the bottom of a 6-foot hole and his name added to the overdose roster..."
I parked behind one of the cars that was here earlier – quickly getting out and running towards the stairs. The door was still unlocked, and the house was still a disaster. I didn’t bother calling out of for him – choosing to run up the stairs and into the bedroom. It was a shock to see the once bright room was now painted a dark red – Tiffany lamps with scarves over them casted a low light across the room. The state of the room matched that of downstairs – the only difference being the random dime bags and needles scattered around. The TV that sat in the corner displayed a shattered screen – looking as if a bullet had gone right through it. Doc had mentioned that Nikki would hallucinate, the drugs telling him that his house was being invaded.
“Where are you?” I whispered as I moved towards the notorious closet.
This was his spot – his safe space to do dangerous things. I took a deep breath before slowly pushing the wooden door – the sight causing my stomach to drop. A collection of used syringes and a revolver laid on the burnt carpet. Bullet holes that matched the one that was put in his TV were displayed on the walls around the small area. This was the room that possessed Nikki – lured him in like a siren out in the ocean. The closet was like a mistress – their relationship buried behind the heavy cathedral doors.
“Nikki!”
 My head shot up at the sound of the shrill voice. The female’s heavy heels slapped against the marble floor as she continued to scream his name out. I removed myself from the closet, walking out of his room as I looked over the banister. She was petite blonde girl – late teens – possibly early 20s. Her clothing was typical of those that hung out on the strip – black leather, short skirts, and tits out for the world to see.
“Nikki, please baby –“She wined as she searched. “I need you right now, baby.”
“He’s not here.”  
She stopped dead in here tracks, her eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets. It was evident that she was one of his junky whores. She not only got to fuck around with Nikki – but she also got to indulge in the glamorous drugs that his fame brought in.  
Her face twisted into disgust, “Who the fuck are you?” Typical valley girl. “And how the fuck did you get in my boyfriend’s house?”
I couldn’t help but smirk as her feathers ruffled. It was cute that she thought Nikki cared about her. I pushed myself from the frame, slowly walking down the stairs. I kept my eyes on her as I took each step – her body twitching as the last of the drugs wore off.
My slightly taller frame stood over her, “I think the better questions is who are you?”
She shifted away – her mind trying to tell her to act normal but her body betraying her. “I’m Colette – Nikki’s girlfriend.” She spoke so surely. “Now – “ She cocked her hip to the side. “Tell me who the fuck you are and why are you in my fucking boyfriend’s house.”
I took a second, just looking at her and thinking what a shame it was that she was in the position she was in. Colette was a very pretty girl – probably came from a good family – actually graduated from high school and had a bright future ahead before she met Satan on the strip.
“How old are you?” I dodged her question.
She looked confused for a second, “19.”
Nikki – you fucking bastard.
“Why are you hanging around a 27-year-old man who’s addicted to ever drug known to man? You should be hanging out with your friends – going to college – not sleazing around on the strip looking for a fuck and a bump.”
“Nikki loves me-“
I let out a laugh, “You honestly think Nikki Sixx – big rockstar for Motley Crue – loves and cares about some little chick he met at a bar? Honey-“ I stepped closer. “The only thing that man loves right now is melted and injected into whatever vein he can find. You’re just a piece of ass to him – an easy fuck that he’s just gonna forget about when the drugs start to wear off. You and I both know you deserve way better than that – Don’t be one of those girls that are just hanging around and getting fucked up just to brag that you bagged Nikki Sixx.”
Maybe telling someone the cold truth wasn’t best when they’re coming down from drugs. Colette instantly broke down in tears – literally falling onto the floor as loud sobs left her body. I couldn’t help but just stand there for a second – to stunned to even do anything right away. I wasn’t expecting that kind of reaction – I was honestly waiting for her to start throwing punches or to cuss me out.
“Oh my God –“ I muttered as I pulled her off the floor. “I didn’t say those things to make you cry.” Mascara streaked down her face. “I was just trying to get you to understand that Nikki isn’t all he’s cracked up to be.” She was still crying – her eyes puffy and lipstick smeared as she wiped away the tears.
“Why do you even care?” Her voice cracking.
I took a deep breath, “ I was married to Nikki.” Her eyes connecting with mine. “We got together way before he formed Motley – back when things were less hazy. I was in your shoes at one point. I was that little girl that hung around the strip, and I let Nikki talk me into a lot of things that I should’ve never done, but he sucks you in with those green eyes and that smile.” Colette stayed silent as I spoke. “I guess what I’m trying to say is just stay away from Nikki or any guy with long hair on the strip for that matter. You’re too pretty to get strung out and have your life ruined by these guys.”
Just like a typical addict, her demeanor instantly changed and the girl that I first met reared back around. She pushed away from me, smoothing out her leather outfit as she rolled her eyes. “You’re a fucking liar.” She sniffed back the remaining tears. “You’re probably some psycho stalker that’s in love with Nikki and you’re just trying to push me away. I love Nikki and he loves me, and I won’t let you or anyone else for that matter get in my way, you stupid bitch!”
Before I had time to reply or react for that matter, her ring clad fist connected with my nose. Searing pain and the sound of bones crunching rang through my brain as I stumbled back. Not giving me the chance to recover, she lurched towards me once again, my red hair balled in her fist as she brought me to the ground. I’m usually scrappy, but the bitch was still high, making her have the strength that she typically would never have. If I didn’t think fast there was a chance that she could cause more damage or even kill me. Before she could send another blow to my face, I brought my knee up, practically stabbing it into her stomach, causing her to fall beside me on the ground. She moaned out in pain, giving me the chance to bring her equal payback...
I never liked fighting, but I could never stop once I started. I would go into another world – blacking everything out as my fist did the damage.
Colette was a bruised, bloody mess by the time Doc arrived, pulling me off her scrawny body. I didn’t even know it was him until his voice finally broke through the fog I was in. Pretty sure I hit him to as I flailed around as he tried to get me under control.
“God dammit, Bryant!” Doc yelled as he threw me onto the couch.
I heard another voice as I crashed back to reality – the site of jet-black hair kneeling beside Colette catching my eye. Nikki carefully picked up the young girl, carrying her bridal style up the staircase to his heroin den.
“She did a number on you, didn’t she?” Doc muttered as he started cleaning my face.
“Fuck you.” I spat as I stormed off the couch. My face was pounding – blood still falling onto my shirt as I walked out the front door. I knew my nose was broken – her rings wreaking havoc on my face with each punch but how fucking dare Nikki tend to her first! I could feel tears welling up as I paced the yard.
“Bryant, you need to get back in the house.” Doc spoke from the stairs.
“Fuck you!” I yelled. “Fuck you! Fuck Nikki! And fuck that stupid fucking cunt, Colette!”
Good thing Nikki didn’t have neighbors or else they would be getting a free show right now.
Doc trudged down the staircase, grabbing my arm off guard, dragging me back into the home Nikki and I once shared. “Sit your ass down.” He firmly placed me into the dining room chair, placing a rag full of ice on the bridge of my nose.
“Fuck me.” I winced as the weight and coldness of the ice balanced on my face.
Doc let out a sigh, “I was going to kick your ass myself for stealing my car, but I’ll give you a break this time.” I rolled my eyes. “Now, you gonna tell me what happened between you two?” 
I glanced up at him, “Isn’t it obvious.”
“It’s obvious you let her get the first punch in.” He smirked. “But I wanna know why it all started?”
“Well, he’s 6’1 and a fucking asshole.”
Doc looked towards the ceiling, “You’re fighting a fucking groupie over Nikki? I thought we got past that point back in 1982?”
“I told her that she doesn’t need to be hanging around a guy like Nikki. She’s too young to be strung out and hanging on the streets of Hollywood trying to get the attention of junky rockstars.”
“Brya-“The sounds of sires caught our attention as the cars pulled behind Nikki’s corvette. I walked closely behind Doc as he walked back to the front door, the officers halfway up the stairs. “Evening officers –“He was sweating. “What seems to be the problem?”
The officer looked over Doc’s shoulder, his eyes connecting with mine. “Got a call about an assault on a young woman.” He placed his hands on his belt. “Are you Bryant Mitchell?”
Doc spoke up first, “Listen officer, this is all just a misunderstanding.”
The officer wasn’t having it, “Doesn’t sound like a misunderstanding, sir.” His hands going for the handcuffs. “Now, are you Bryant Mitchell?”
He let her call the fucking cops on me. “Yes, sir.” My voice low.
The man nodded his head, pushing Doc out of the way as he reached moved behind me, grabbing onto my arms as he placed the cuffs around my wrists. “Bryant Mitchell, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say could be used against you in the court of law…”
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valeskafics · 1 year
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okay this is random but also here are my fc's for some of the oc/uncasted in the show yet peeps in the stories!!! but of course you can imagine them however you want!!!
wolves
-cregan stark - logan lerman
-sara snow stark - nina dobrev
wolves/scream
-william tyrell - douglas booth
-alys rivers - emma roberts (black hair era i miss it)
stepbro
-johanna lannister - sydney sweeney
-robin tully - cameron monaghan
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fearsmagazine · 1 year
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UNWELCOME - Review
DISTRIBUTOR: Well Go USA Entertainment
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SYNOPSIS:  “A couple escapes their urban nightmare to the tranquility of rural Ireland only to hear stories of mysterious beings who live in the gnarled, ancient wood at the foot of their new garden. As warned by their new neighbors, in Irish lore the Redcaps will come when called to help souls in dire need of rescue, but it’s crucial to remember that there is always a dear price to pay for their aid.”
REVIEW: I am a big fan of Irish filmmaker John Wright. If you’ve never seen his films “Robot Overlords” or “Grabbers” I highly recommend them. In fact, his 2012 film “Grabbers” would make an excellent aspiring for a double feature with UNWELCOME. Wright takes a bit of Irish folklore and adds some excellent visual effects that look like some old-school Wētā FX.
At its core, UNWELCOME is an old Irish folklore tale about the little people, here they are the red-caps. Maya, pregnant with their first child, and Jamie are still dealing with the trauma of being attacked in their London flat when Jamie’s aunt passes and leaves them her house in Ireland. As they are settling in, one of the owners of the local pub springs the legend of the red caps on her and asks her to take up the promise of leaving them a nightly tribute. Of course the city folks are taking it with a grain of salt and you can’t help but feel Maya is going to drop the ball. The title comes from the conflict between the Londoners and a local family contracted to work on the aunt’s house. Clearly the father, Whelan, is a loving abusive parent whose children are prejudiced against the British who came to their land, oppressed them and pillaged their land. It adds a nice socio-political edge to the tale. Of course go awry and Maya reaches out to the red-caps for help. Of course their help comes with a price. The red-caps feel spawned from the screenwriter’s imagination and have more in common with the creatures of films like “Don't Be Afraid of the Dark” (both the tv movie and feature film) and “The Trilogy of Terror” Zuni doll. It is a slow burn that builds to the climax where the little fellows go on a rampage. The nice thing is that while they are deadly wee folk, they are not invulnerable. It’s a bit more intense than “Grabbers” and is an excellent story.
The film quickly goes from the London apartment to the Irish countryside. The cinematography explodes with the colors and textures of the countryside, in contrast there are the shadows and hues that exist beyond the gate where the red-cap live. There are a variety of excellent locations and as the film moves into the land of the red-caps some excellent set pieces. The creatures are an excellent blend of live action and puppets, very impressive and almost on par with anything from the Peter Jackson Tolkien movies. There are some graphic moments, along with a few “oos” and “ahs,” and those are back loaded onto the climax and end of the film. The production designs are fabulous. I loved the red-cap home. I adored Christian Henson’s score. You would assume it would feature many traditional Irish instruments. However, they’re subtle and sparse, creating more of an engrossing dark fairy tale feel.
Wright has assembled a great cast. You’ll clearly recognize Colm Meaney, from his numerous credits including “Star Trek: Deep Space Nine," and Kristian Nairn, who played Hodor on “Game of Thrones.” The film features Hannah John-Kamen as Maya, who has appeared in the MCU and “Star Wars” films and Jamie is played by Douglas Booth, who we’ve seen in films like “Jupiter Ascending” and “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.” It’s a very natural and organic cast that doesn't rely on stereotypes. I especially enjoyed Douglas Booth’s performance. He creates a sympathetic character who you feel for and are routing to overcome his trauma. I equally enjoyed the actors bringing the town folk to life.
UNWELCOME is a complex tale that uses Celtic myths, as well as Brothers Grimm fairytale themes, to explore themes of violence and how someone might respond is pushed to their limits. The red-cap became the embodiment of that extreme and is an interesting spin on a creature feature/horror film because they are not supernatural creatures, they can be killed, and feel like a force of nature. The film also addresses the concept of consequences for choices, be careful what you wish for. I like Warwick Davis and his work, but if you are a genre fan looking for a film to mark St. Patrick’s Day you couldn’t do better than Jon Wright’s “Grabbers” or certainly UNWELCOME.
CAST: Hannah John-Kamen, Douglas Booth, Jamie-Lee O'Donnell, Colm Meaney, Niamh Cusack, and Kristian Nairn. CREW: Director/Screenplay - Jon Wright; Screenplay - Mark Stay; Producers - Piers Tempest & Peter Touche; Cinematographer - Hamish Doyne-Ditmas; Score - Christian Henson; Editing - Zsófia Tálas; Production Designer - John Beard; Costume Designer - Annie Hardinge; Special Makeup Effects Designer - Kristyan Mallett; Special Effects Supervisor - Mark Holt; Visual Effects Supervisor - Paddy Eason. OFFICIAL: wellgousa.com/films/unwelcome FACEBOOK: www.facebook.com/WellGoUSA TWITTER: twitter.com/wellgousa TRAILER: https://youtu.be/WepP1wVhX8o RELEASE DATE: in theaters March 10th as part of AMC Theaters' Thrills and Chills, & on digital March 14th, 2023
**Until we can all head back into the theaters our “COVID Reel Value” will be similar to how you rate a film on digital platforms - 👍 (Like), 👌 (It’s just okay),  or 👎 (Dislike)
Reviewed by Joseph B Mauceri
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