#doesnt matter if i do it in the privacy of my own home or on the street

[dballzposting]

I think I'm too tired to properly spin this yarn but

Well Chichi is a heterosexual woman.

She is a woman who wants very much to live traditionally and love loyally. Her satisfaction from life stems from having a stable lifelong partner and from being the matriarch of her own family.

She is also, perhaps predictably, a very romantic person. Shes predisposed to it, jumping on it when it enters her worldview, and as a kid, she becomes committed to Son Goku.

She was very upset when he didnt play the romance game with her, and continues to be upset when he isnt the present family man that she needs him to be.

So. Becasue of all of this, you would not consider her a candidate for a romantic triste (that may be the wrong word but I mean, like, an affair). And yeah, true! She just wants to be loyal, and for her mate to be worthwhile, god damnit! It's the taurus in her!

But listen. She is a very traditional and high-strung woman. And theres this phenomenon where people who follow very strict rules may break strange ones, becasue everyone breaks them every once in a while, and if everything is a big deal to you, then you lose sight of what REALLY shouldnt be broken.

And Chichi, yknow, we all know her, yknow? Shes romantic. Shes strong and forceful. Shes a consummate lover, man, I feel like she just really needs that emotional and physcial satisfaction, yknow? Of course it all happens in the privacy of the home of the married couple because THATS PROPER ! And that's how she wants it to be.

But listen, man, ms Chichi? She's a little off her rocker, yknow?

Hey, listen. I do believe that Ms Chichi is heterosexual. But in a lifestyle that does little to develop base pursuits, sexuality means nothing. Who cares what you feel about whom. All that matters is that you find yourself in the family structure that you need to have, with a partner who can help make it happen. Those feelings of physcial attraction - while are nice to feel and to have satisfied - arent a prerequisite to the stability and fulfillment she would get by a life partner whom she likes well enough otherwise to make her happy and fill her needs. My point is that it's like 1950s USA all up in her shit and sex is an underdeveloped reality, unexplored and underappreciated for its versatility and nuance. Therefore, it holds almost no bearing over her practical mind.

But make no mistake - our Venus-in-Taurus Chichi is a strong and physical woman who does need some lovings from time to time.

LISTEN, OKAY? You may feel that what I am about to say is contradictory but hear me out.

If Ms Chichi got hit on by a woman she would not tolerate it to start. She would have her fists on her hips and she'd be glaring and she'd be like "Uh huh. Okay. I've heard of this. Every now and then you get a woman who thinks it's her place to talk to another woman that way. To speak in such a manner - it degrades the whole sex, doesnt it? Better than having the men hear you speak like that, I suppose - but I for one wont disrespect myself by standing here listening to it."

See Chichi wouldnt snap at a woman in her current age the way she would always snap at a man becasue, well, her women are her fellows. She'll hear them out. She knows theyre smart.

But listen. Man. Goku's been fucked off training with Oob for forever. Piccolo wont visit since Goten got older and no longer needs the extra parental guidance (and Goten has frankly become intolerable company and we all know that thats why Piccolo wont visit but that's beside the point). What's a woman like Chichi supposed to do?

Shes ran a tight ship and a good home. She controls her own life. No one even cares what she does anymore. No one has looked at her in a long time.

She has strong beliefs and she reaps self-esteem from playing by them, romantic loyalty is a huge deal to her. But loyalty to whom? What about loyalty to herself?

Hey, this other woman may have spoken to her that way, but she was a sharp-eyed and witty woman, and good company is hard to find these days!

Chichi is not so prideful that she cant see eye to eye with her fellows. It's been a while since she delighted in fresh feminine connection. Women get it, you know?

It's been even longer since shes had physcial satisfaction. She used to be a martial artist, but she hasnt maintained it enough to keep her joints from aching, and with her husband gone, her life is just void of all physicality. Maybe she just wants to be GRABBED, yknow ?

Shes her own woman. Goddamn.

What I'm trying to say is that if she was hit on by a woman, she would assertively disagree and respectfully hold her volume, and she'd leave.

And then later she'd circle back.

She'd come back with her fists on her hips, still glaring at you strongly from under her titled forehead, and be like "Oye. You got seven minutes." Meaning that you've got 7 minutes to impress her and make this worth her time.

If you dont impress her than she would be set in her conviction and leave with full confidence and zero regret or curiosity.

But with that reality looming, she'll stick around for 7 minutes to see what you have to say. She'll give a fellow woman a chance. And if you impress her, maybe you'll get more than just 7 minutes of conversation out of her.

Becasue Ms Chichi is fearless, becasue again, when everything is vulgur, nothing is. Henceforth she'll refer to you as a "close friend" to others and humour you in raunchy conversation. Or depending on your personality or on what you did together, she'd prefer you to be a bittersweet midnight lover, never to return again ...

Ms Chichi everyone

#dballz posting #didnt have time to make this post. Made it anyway

[fyodorloveclub]

between dazai, fyodor, and shibusawa, who do you think is more likely to have sex with you in public places? I read that post you answered about fyodor fucking me in front of them and it turned me on 👀 I just love the way your mind works and feel the need to ask you your opinions

one hundreeddddd percent dazai like without a doubt. just for my own personal enjoyment i like to imagine fyodor fucking you in public but i dont think its super accurate to his personality. i feel like he'd def value privacy. and i dont really think shibusawa necessarily gives a shit, but like i dont think he cares enough to go out of his way to do it in public. like thats too much work for him, for something he doesnt feel that strongly about.

but dazai on the other hand is a little slut. he has no shame, mf will do it wherever, whenever. randomly horny at work? fine, to the empty conference room or the bathroom you go. you can drag him to any dressing room, bathroom, closet, ANYWHERE he will not complain. there has in fact been more than one occasion where the two of you were walking home at night, maybe from dinner or a bar or even work, and he just cannot wait to get you home, so he pulls you into an alley or behind a building, hoists your leg up, and fucks you right then and there. and yes, you have sucked him off under his desk at work.

and this isnt necessarily a public thing, but i can see him being into fucking all over your apartment, like not just the bed. he wants to fuck you against the edge of the balcony, bend you over the kitchen counter, have you ride him in his office chair. dude will honestly just push you to the ground anywhere and fuck you right then and there. the setting could not matter less to him, he just needs you there.

#also thank u that compliments is so so sweet <3 #and i am a huge fan of giving my opinions so #voices in my head #demons #{ musings; dazai }

[yelenasdiary]

Hi, I just wanted to tell smth, bcs i feel like i need to "vent" to someone that doesnt know me. I hope its alright.

I knew I was gay ever since I was 11, (Im 18 now) I never talked openly about this, although I came out to my sister when I was about 15. She was completely supporting and the only person that knew about it. Of course Im openly gay online, because I can be anonymous that way.

Im not someone that can talk about their feelings, i always just kept everything to myself, not even my bestfriend knows Im gay. Recently however I became a little more open. I have a lot, and I mean A LOT queer people at my school, so this topic is pretty popular there, and everytime someone asked me abt my sexuality, I just said that its complicated.

Today I talked with a friend about sexuality and everything, she came out to me as ace and asked abt me, so I surprisingly said that im lesbian. Comepletely honestly. After the conversation about out sexualities I felt a lot lighter and more free, so after coming back home I got this weird confidence and decided that after 7 whole years of being closeted, Im going to tell my mom.

She was accepting and completely supported me, said that the only thing she needs is for me to be happy. Surprisingly she even came out to me as bi.

Now please dont misunderstand me, I know that a lot of people end up with very bad response, sometimes even getting kicked out, I know that Im very privileged bcs of that reaction from my mom, however instead of feeling light, happy or finally free, I just have this kind of dread. I dont know how to describe it. I feel so weird that my mom knows now this big part of me, its a completely different feeling than what I have with friends. In a way I even regret it. Im scared that my mom will see me different now.

I think Im maybe just used to this whole privacy of my sexuality, thats why the feeling of regret.

What do you think about this?

Also, after telling my mom, I kind of feel free to tell my bsf now, I dont know if I should tho. And also my other friends, most of them (if not all lmao) are queer themselfs, so its obvious It would be okay.

I asked my mom if i should tell my bsf, and she said no, that its a private thing and no one needs to know about it. This kind of gives me iffy vibes, like why treat it like some kind of taboo?

I want to live honestly, and be true to myself, without needing to hide

sorry for this long text

Firstly - I think you are extremely brave for coming out to anybody! it's not easily and it can be uncomfortable so I just want to say that even though I don't know you but I am very proud of you!

It can be scary and uncomfortable when you first come out to anybody, it's that voice in the back of our minds that try to convince us that we shouldn't have told anybody because we've kept it in for so long that we start to tell ourselves that there is somewhat of a second option. I'm not sure if you know what I mean but that's how I felt when I came out to my mother. It wasn't ideal, she made a homophobic comment about a lesbian couple chill in the back seat of their car and I sort of snapped at her and told her what I identify as and now she's trying to adjust to that.

My mother sometimes makes comments where and there that make me annoyed but I can't expect her to understand straight away so I've been giving her time to get used to the imagine of her daughter not wanting to have their own kids and that I may one day marry a woman.

Secondly - I think if you want to come out to others, go for it!! You should be proud of who you are and it's not something you have to keep to yourself anymore. Sure, if people have something negative to say about it, that is on them. You are a lovely person and have a wonderful heart. You are loved and most certainly wanted!

You and everybody else who sees my blog will always have a safe place to come and vent or share news no matter how big or small it might fell.

Again, congratulations on coming out! I'm so proud of you and sending you lots and lots of love!! Stay well x

#yelenasdiary asks #anon

[s0urdoughs]

for matty & graeme: 🩲 🔍 👁️ 🍣 📈

🩲 Does your character have any particular clothes that they like to wear when their belly doesn't feel good, especially if they're feeling really bloated? What would they wear at home vs if they had to go out?

I don’t think matty minds tight clothing, in fact, I think he loves that he’s outgrowing his clothes. He’ll try and be decent when going out but if he ate to the point his belly shows or a button pops he’ll want to show it off with pride.

meanwhile graeme has plenty of big sweaters and hoodies to cover his bloated tummy when going out. He doesnt care when in the privacy of his own home. He isnt so scared of having his tummy out, but more so if someone points out its showing before he notices

🔍 What do others (friends, partners, strangers, coworkers, etc) think of your character when they're very visibly stuffed after a big meal? Whether it be about their appearance, habits, capacity, etc

both of them are big eaters naturally, so being visibly stuffed really isn’t a strange thing to see. but mattheu having been previously thin, people who’ve known him before gaining weight are probably impressed he can actually keep it on but knowing that he’s dating a selkie it all makes sense. his appetite has increased severely and practically doubles in size when you have him over for a big meal. seconds, thirds, and room for dessert, it all fits in that ever-growing flabby gut of his

👁️ How visible is fullness on your character? After a small meal? A big one? After being stuffed to their absolute limit?

Graeme gets absolutely round and huge when stuffing himself to the max. A big meal, you could probably tell too but at least he still has the ability to get up and move around with ease.

Matty’s belly is so soft I think you can only tell by the top of his stomach bloating out while the rest remains wobbly. When he’s stuffed full he still looks soft but his belly feels super tight and sounds like a drum when patted.

🍣 Is there a particular country/culture whose food your character is more likely to overeat, whether it be their own culture, one they encounter often, or just a culinary favorite? What dishes are most likely to leave them stuffed silly?

graeme strikes me as someone who would absolutely love sushi bars or all you can eat seafood buffets. my dude is part seal, he LOVES seafood and can easily go overboard if there were no limits involved.

matty can and will fuck up any sort of greasy american diner food. burgers and fries, milkshakes, a huge stack of pancakes, omelettes and hashbrowns, you name it.

📈 How far past their comfortable limit will your character eat when circumstances call for them to keep going? Will they push themselves to the point of nausea? Pain? Actual sickness? Does somebody have to tell them to stop? Or will they just quit when they're full no matter what?

Both of them do absolutely have a limit and that can vary depending on a lot of factors. also, I’m personally uncomfortable and not into detailed talk about being nauseous and getting sick so I don’t really like putting any character through situations that can end up that way. Pain from overdoing it yes, but it doesn’t go beyond feeling bloated and tight.

#sunny answers

[nothing-a-good-nap-cant-fix]

now that school has allowed face to face, my thoughts are more reorganized, and im not spiraling into the same cycles in the comfort of my own bed. Now, ive met some people who were able to help me settle in the normal every day interactions and activities.

It makes things easier for me to get a ground of where im currently at, and evaluate my current state of mind and im able to grasp my thoughts and explain them in an understandable way. I don't talk in blurs anymore and dont speak in incomprehensible frenzy of emotions and mental breakdowns. Mentally, and psychologically. Physical doesnt matter to me anymore.

Speaking of physical, ever since i left my relatives and went back to staying home, the impact of my stay there severely affected me. I remember constant reminders of how i look. The shape of my body, my hygiene, my figure. It was a daily comment. Maybe to them, it was innocent. Maybe because they already said it to each other on the daily and weren't affected by it, they thought it was okay to joke about mine as well. I dont know. All i know that for once in my life i started caring about the thing i saw whenever i passed by the mirror. I couldnt bear to look at my face anymore knowing it was me. It was painful knowing that this was the body i lived in. I couldnt even skip meals to make me feel even just a little bit better, and avoid them, because theyd always start accusing me of acting emotional, being bitter, being immature, emo, moody, whatever words an adult can throw at a developing teenager. I wanted to die.

I had little to no privacy, sharing a room with someone, bunk bed, in a cramped stuffy room, no door to block out anything. The only personal space i had was my own bed, which even people liked to occasionally drag me from. I had issues with school at the time, that's why i was living with them. But they weren't helping. All they did was scold me about why i couldnt solve it on my own. They said that they were my age when they could already supervise their own school files, and that i should know it too. They shouldnt be doing stuff for me, they said. Im old enough, they said. But i dont know how to do it. I cant do it. They say im weird because im always scared to talk to people to ask to people. They get mad when i couldnt buy eggs because i was scared. I didn't know where the store is and even though they gave instructions. It was already hard for me to go out and buy normally. whatever.

Im so tired. I have to deal with everything that comes my way and i just want to scream and kick and cry.

But what if i do? Nothing will happen. Nothing will change. Ill just look more stupid. I might do something that will make more issues for me. I cant risk it, itll ruin my already peaceful situation.

I hate sundays. Its when my parents decide to stay home for the day and get mad at some point eventually. Usually, its about the messy state of our house. About how we should clean. Always so messy, they said.

Im tired. I dont want to live like this anymore. Ive changed. Thank goodness. I dont want to die anymore. I dont think ive ever wanted to die. I just wanted to stop existing to people. I want to stay as a spectator forever. All i do is watch from the sidelines. I dont want to be acknowledged, or known, or even seen.

Whatever.

Im tired. I want to cry. But i cant. Whatll it do? Nothing. It does nothing. It just makes me look more stupid. It will give me a cold. Itll have people aksing why im crying. Stupid dumbfucks. I wish theyd go somwhere else. I hate it when people ask if im okay. I want to bash their brains in. They should be shutting up. Sht the fuck up shut the fuck up shut the fuck up shut the fuck up shut the fuck up shut the fuck up shut up bitch. Dead dead adead die die die die die die die die. Im tired. Maybe i should start smoking. But they said its painful. What should i do? Self harm? I cant do slits. Too showy. People will notice. They might even report me. Embarassing, theyll ask bulldhit questions at the office. What the fuck. I need something. Ah. Starving. I can. I should stop eating. Dad said i was growing weaker. I regret eating today. I wish i ddint eat. I wish i didny ask for anythibg. I wish i starved starve starve

[annaraksta]

why is warming up before a run so inexplicably embarrassing? i'm just swinging my little legs around and rotating my poor ankles and the whole time i feel like i would rather be dead.

#and i know! i know how important warming up is! but the urge to just rush through it is strong #doesnt matter if i do it in the privacy of my own home or on the street #the shame is always there like wtf!!! #i blame movies and shows that make running look like something you do as you get up from bed #out the door and away #not in this creeky little flesh prison! #anyway. maybe i am very alone in this #running #personal #words

[sunarintoes]

Pretty Setter Squad Boyfriend Headcanons

part one can be found here II wc: 2.4k II includes: kageyama, suga, kenma, akaashi, semi and oikawa II atsumu and shirabu 

rewriting because i cringe at the old hcs 😭

✗ Kagggggsss

✗ The emotionally constipated blueberry <3 oh yeahh 😎

✗ Okay well first off he can barely process his emotions (*cough* evidently *cough*)

✗ When you two first started going out he was quite shy and unsure of what to do so you may have had to guide him a bit, but if youre equally shy then it just would have taken longer to get to where you are now; oh and if that was the case it probably took some random burst of energy/confidence from either one of you to make the first move. 

✗ He will buy you milk but uf you hate it (like me 🤢) he will buy you another drink - like juice :D

✗ I dont think he will be the most affectionate, it’s not his love language - and neither are words haHAH. His love language is most likely quality time and gift giving.

✗ He does like to cuddle though 😳

✗ In fact he really likes to :D his favourite is when youre sitting in his lap while he watches a volleyball game (at home - he hates pda). 

✗ This brings us to our next, short point. Kageyama absolutely despises pda, he just thinks its something meant for closed doors and he does not believe that he has to display his relationship for the whole world to ogle at. The most he will do is light hand holding - mostly just linking your pinkies though.

✗ When it comes to height he does not care if you're smaller or taller than him ← but bb, please don't tease him about his height if he’s shorter because he will blow a fuse.

✗ He alternates between small spoon and big spoon, kinda depending on his mood. 

✗ BOY O BOY does he get jealous. Uh please reign in your setter >:( 

✗ Its mostly due to the fact that he’s insecure about himself - he thinks you will leave him like everyone else (in middle school - yes, he is still traumatised from it.)

✗ When he does get jealous he might be snappy to the other person and glare at them or be snappy at you and glare at you. When this happens please give him space because he needs it to clear his head. When he feels better he will come up to you and hug you into his chest so that he can’t see your face and you cant see his, then he will mumble an apology.

✗ Ever since you two began to date he has practiced apologising and getting better at apologising, this is because his inability to admit to his own mistakes was a sour patch in your relationship that almost ended it but he really did not want to lose you so he sucked up his pride and worked on what he had to; of course you also worked in what you had to. God I love character development 😩

✗ Dates are mostly at home dates or dates revolving around volleyball. If you're not into volleyball, Kageyama would not date you, it's something he is so passionate about and loves with every breath he takes (like you) and he refuses to compromise one love for the other. 

✗ ooooh he likes arcade dates a well! He thrives in a competitive environment. If you're not competitive and don't want to compete against him then he’ll compete for you - against the machines lol. Of course you play as well! But i doubt youre as competitive as this blueberry, and if you are - well i guess at the end of the day youll both be stacked in tokens 🤠

✗ Sugawara my beloved <33

✗ He. Is. So. Affectionate! 

✗ Mans loves skin on skin contact ykwim?

✗ He is down for pda and does not care what others think - only what you think <3. 

✗ I mean he might make out with you in public if you ask nicely 

✗ Dates are very fun with him, he’ll take you to cafes, to amusement parks, to carnivals, to movies and all the like. He’s a cliche lover and he’s proud of it.

✗ Your first kiss happened on New Years Eve/Day. The two of you sat on the roof of his house and watched as the fireworks lit up the starry sky of Miyagi and chanted the count down together. The second ‘one’ left your lips he grabbed your face (softly!!) and pulled you in to crash his lips against yours. 

✗ Suga loves to cuddle, preferably face to face because he just thinks you're the most beautiful person in the world. 

✗ He is not the most jealous person, he definitely does get jealous but never of strangers. It's more when his close friends or your close friends get a bit too comfortable if that makes sense? He normally plays it off with humour and messes around because he acknowledges that he is insecure and that it is most likely him thinking of the worst case scenario; however if he really does start to worry and get jealous then he will sit you down and talk about it with you. To him, communication is key. 

✗ Ngl Kenma is definitely in my top 3 favourites. 

✗ I may or may not be a Kenma kinnie 😳🙈

✗ i love my non-toxic gamer boy <33 anywho: no matter what ANYONE says, kenma is definitely affectionate. In fact I'd say he’s one of the most affectionate boyfriends. As we all know, he is shy and introverted but he likes to hang around and spend time with people he likes. He also talks a lot to them. So I hc that he’s a bit of a chatterbox with you and it makes him really happy when you let him talk about a game or a theory he has. He’s a great listener so you can count on him to pay attention to what you say.

✗ if you didn't already have one, he bought you a switch. He loves video game dates especially when he can't see you in person (*cough* lockdown *cough*) 

✗ he loves when you sit on his lap when he plays video games. I know everyone talks about sitting on their partner’s lap as some sexual thing and yeah that can happen but most of the time he’s really soft with you and just enjoys being close to you. Loves when you cuddle into him while he plays so that he can place his head on yours or your shoulder. 

✗ i think he is a bit shy when it comes to kisses but definitely warms up after a while. He absolutely refuses to sleep if he doesnt get your goodnight kisses. He loves to kiss you on your nose and your cheeks the most. He loves when you kiss him on the forehead and the nose <3

✗ kenma is not one for pda, it's just not his vibe. He prefers intimacy and privacy; his relationship is not a movie for the world to watch and gawk at. Especially timeskip!kenma. Though that does not mean he wont ever show you skinship in public, occasionally he will softly hold your hand and maybe press a light kiss to your cheek. 

✗ in terms of jealousy, he is moderate. Kenma, as we all know, has incredible people reading skills, so he understands the situation pretty clearly and knows when you’re uncomfortable/what you think of the situation. Most of the time you can deal with the unwanted attention and he doesnt get jealous, but he does get insecure. He shows this by going quiet and looking away when you look at him, you can cure this by giving him hugs when you get home. 

✗ Akaashi my beloved <3 he’s so pretty i can't even-

✗ ugh! Just imagine him in a dark/light academia aesthetic. 

✗ perfection. 

✗ akaashi is the sweetest most attentive boyfriend, he loves you to pieces and never fails to let you know. He tells you he loves you every morning and every night. He probably makes meals for you and leaves notes in that have a sweet comment like “i love you, you're the best <3” 

✗ he love back hugging you BUT also receiving back hugs 🥺✨

✗ akaashi is a booknerd and an introvert. Please cuddle up to him and let him read his book to you. 

✗ there are only 2 things that can restore his social battery: sleeping and you.

✗ which means he wants cuddles when he’s tired 😊

✗ he is not jealous. He just doesn't get jealous, maybe annoyed if the third party is being a bit too pushy and you're clearly uncomfortable, but he just never feels jealous. No matter how hard you may try to make him jealous (plz dont cause that's kinda toxic imo) he just won't feel that way.

✗ definitely the ‘mom/dad’ as he carries sinister, pads, bandaids → a whole first aid kit basically, everywhere. Bb must be prepared. 

✗ dates are so sweet with him, cute niche cafes and dimly lit libraries. Maybe the occasional abandoned building. He loves spending time with you, so really he's happiest whenever he’s with you; having coffee at McDonalds or a niche cafe won't change anything. 

✗ he’s hard to pinpoint for pda. I feel like he’s indifferent about it. He probably prefers to keep it indoors or to just small and sweet gestures (no making out in public sorry-). It definitely comes down to your preferences, if you don't like it then he won't and vice versa.

✗ semi semi semi semi semi semi

✗ omg mr musician 

✗ he definitely plays guitar - lead guitar and bass guitar. 

✗ skilled fingies for sure 😗

✗ boy why are musicians so hot???? 😫😫😫💦💦

✗ he writes songs about you. Semsem has a bit of trouble saying exactly how he feels, so he writes it and sings it to you with a small little smile and eyes full of love. 

✗ off topic but Semu has the best music taste in haikyuu

✗ he loves hugs so much <33 please hug and cuddle with him 24/7

✗ very affectionate, he’s always touching you someway. Loves kissing your forehead. 

✗ he is jealous. Yeah definitely. He writes songs about being jealous 🗿 not that you mind of course ‘cause they're bangers. I think he might get snappy when he’s jealous, not directly at you but at the other person. He definitely gets a bit bitchy. Sometimes he acts that way to you so you've just gotta slap some sense into him. Say something like “what's your problem?” or “tell me what your problem is so i can help fix it.” ← that's probably the best thing to say. 

✗ afterwards he’ll just snuggle with you until he feels better. 

✗ he asks for your opinion about his songs all the time, please be honest (but also praise them if you like them lol)

✗ he takes you to niche spots he finds, like hidden concerts and stuff. Loves when you come to his gigs <3 oh and when you scream for him (in more ways than one). 

✗ dates are cute and fun. Mostly walking around together → carnivals, main street, farmers market. Those kind of things. 

✗ when it comes to pda he loves it. Loves being able to show the world who his s/o is. If you don't like it then he will tone it down and only do what you’re comfortable with. If you're also into pda then he will happily make out with you anywhere (you're one of THOSE couples 🤢 /j) 

✗ all round best boyfie <3

✗ oikawa 😳 have i told y'all how much i love him? Oikawa is the best written character, no cap, he is so complex and real it's crazy. It's so fun to write about him because you can pick him apart, you know his flaws, his weaknesses, his nightmares but also his strengths and dreams. Anywho i'll stop ranting now but i just love writing for such a perfectly imperfect character-

✗ he puts up a cocky exterior but thats all false. He's as scared as you are, he's scared that you'll leave him like his exes because of how obsessed and focused he is on volleyball. However he is a changed man, he's learned to balance his priorities. If you ever feel like you're being sidelined please communicate with him. 

✗ he values communication above all else and wants nothing more in a partner than for them to also value communication.

✗ back to the point → if you feel insecure of your relationship and that volleyball is taking too much of his attention let him know. He will change that. To an extent → he may have an important game coming up which is why he is focusing more, but he will always find time for you. 

✗ he never forgets to text you good morning and good night. He also sends you wholesome memes and makes sure you're taking care of yourself - they're like reminders for him to also take care of himself. 

✗ he is both jealous and insecure. Everyone who gets too close to you or spends a lot of time with you, he is jealous of. Jealous because he wishes he could spend more time with you but he knows he can't - not without jeopardising his volleyball career. He's also insecure, because he knows you could just leave him for a more fulfilling, more attentive, more balanced relationship. You know that too, I mean, of course you could leave him but no one would be as good as him. No one could match up to your beautifully flawed boyfriend.

✗ he is affectionate, very, very affectionate. He loves you so much. And because he spends so much time on volleyball, anytime with you he's touching you - memorizing every dint, every curve, everything about you so that he won't ever forget. 

✗ Oikawa has trouble sleeping unless he's with you, he wants to sling to you in his sleep and be grounded and remember that he is loved and cherished and appreciated y'know?

✗ pda is not an issue for him. He doesn't care what anyone else says or thinks :P in this relationship the only opinions that matter are his and your’s. Tell him you're uncomfortable with something and he won't do it, and vice versa. But otherwise, like Semi, he won't mind having a good makeout session with you in the middle of the street ;)

#haikyuu x reader #oikawa x reader #haikyuu fluff #Oikawa Tōru x reader #Oikawa headcanons #pretty setter squad x reader #pretty setter squad headcanons #Suga x reader #sugawara x reader #sugawara headcanons #kageyama headcanons #kageyama x reader #semi x reader #semi headcanons #semi Eita x reader #Akaashi x reader #Akaashi headcanons #kenma x reader #kenma headcanons #Haikyuu headcanons

[h0rr0r-enthusiast]

would you consider rambling about asa or jesse? I'm interested in what you have in mind for them

alright i’ve been pushing this off for ages for no good reason so here’s that long awaited list of random hcs about jesse ,, i only have a couple hcs about asa so i think i’d rather rewatch his films or read more about him before i write about him,, until then enjoy this

(uh this will probably get a bit long)

Jesse Cromeans Headcanons

- first things first, the is mf is bi. i don’t make the rules. this guy swf doesn’t care about gender but if u ask him about his sexuality he will either refuse to answer (he probably feels he’s too old for labels) or start askin if ur interested

- idk why but im convinced he's half or a quarter puerto rican. i just feel like his mom was puerto rican and married his dad when she was really young. she died when he was young and primarily lived with his father's side of the family. after his mother's death he lost contact with her side of the family so he doesn't feel a strong connection with his puerto rican heritage. i doubt jesse cares much either. i dont think he's ever felt much of a connection or had much of an interest in learning about his own heritage or family history.

- jesse doesn’t rly like animals, especially ones that shed. he doesn’t like them and they don’t like him, it’s a mutual understanding. he also can’t be bothered to take care of any animal no matter how minimal their care is. he does not want to meet ur dog and i can promise u ur dog does not want to meet him.

- his eyes are a slightly orangey brown w warm undertones,, theyre light enough that you can see all the lil details of his iris w/o any sunlight,,

- a lil more about his eyes ! considering he was stabbed in the eye while on the “job”, he likely didn’t have any time to properly treat it or receive medical treatment for it until after his incident,, obviously that means the eye’s not of any use anymore but i also think it’s likely that the chemicals from the glue on his mask that melted his face off also damaged that bad eye beyond repair,, this leads me to believe he wears a glass eye ! typically when i draw his bad eye it’s a dull grey but that’s just an artistic preference,, tbh he probably has a whole collection of various colors ranging from natural to more fantastical,, i also think he used to have perfect 20/20 vision before but w those glue chemicals being near his eyes he was probably blind for a lil while as he healed from his injuries,, i wouldn’t be surprised if all the blunt force trauma he received from getting hit w a bat damaged his eyesight even more. he probably got laser eye surgery to correct it.

- man definitely has tattoos. im not sure if he'd have full sleeves but i can imagine him gettin em in the future if he doesn't already have em (especially to feel better about his appearance and feel some sense of control over the way he looks). what im absolutely sure of is that he has his whole back inked up. i wanna incorporate his tattoos into my drawings of him but i need to design em first.

- another thing about his appearance- he definitely has his own gym at home. before the incident he likely had his own trainer but i doubt he has one now,, probably trains on his own so he doesnt have to show his face.

- keeps his home neat and tidy, but has house maids do all the dirty work adn heavy lifting for him. all he has to do is keep everything the same until they come back the next week. he also has one special cleaner who gets rid of any blood stains and bloody bandages from wounds. the other maids don't know anything about his less legal activities.

- he never invites one night stands to his home and always throws parties at a separate location. he owns multiple properties and never reveals his home location for both privacy and safety reasons. this was especially true for when his wife was still alive.

- he has a special morning and night routine for his face and its time consuming

- jesse has alopecia and hes had it for as long as he can remember. it's spread more and more over the years so at a young age he just decided to start shaving and waxing his whole body. after he started participating in less than legal activities he found being hairless to be pretty useful. for this reason he got the hair on some parts of his body (primarily arms, hands, and legs) permanantly removed thru laser hair removal. it makes it harder to trace any evidence back to him thru hair.

this is already rly long so im not gonna go any further for now

#mypost #Slashers #slasher fandom #jesse cromeans #chromeskull #laid to rest #laid to rest 2 #slasher headcanons #headcanons #as u can tell i think about this man a lot #he lives in my head rent free

[mikeshanlon]

what do you think are the other ggreboot characters zodiacs?

okay so just gonna like ramble about some placements i think they might have and disclaimer i am no expert or necessarily Fixed in these possible placements. also every sign has good and bad and manifests itself in diff ways so if u dont love the placements i chose sorry babes bladididahhh okay continuing

julien: def think she is a gemini, i think she def gives mutable/gemini sign vibes both in how sometimes she will be a lot more calculated and "bitchy" and then be a lot softer (not saying geminis are two faced but multifaceted), and in how she wants to grow over the course of the season and become more authentic. especially with how geminis are curious and want to see how the world works and question things, the more she explore the more she understands herself. geminis are also super fun and magnetic which i think fits her vibe. plus i think she is definitely a good communicator, even tho i think her speech in 1.04 was.... something... she was able to pull it out on the spot and be well spoken and convince the party goers, so very good with her communication imo. leo rising, bc u kno Magnetic Grand Influencer. always aware of how shes percieved. can be rash, but like, she's fun, shes got a warm heart.

zoya: zoya is canonically a libra (october 22). i think that fits in a lot of aspects, she definitely embodies the traits of libra that are very concerned with justice, and i do think she is diplomatic/logical (her knowing whats important to her and not as caught up in the world of reputation as the others), tho less of a... pushover/peacekeeper as aki is. also her love of the arts in reading/plays. def think she probably has aquarius placements given again the sense of justice but also her being more outspoken/rebellious/unpredictable... aqua mars maybe? could be a cancer moon, for the idea of nostalgia/past, wanting home and security, hating superficiality.

aki: obviously i have not shut up abt him being a libra sun. i just know it in my bones its the introverted libra blueprint the peacekeeping the innocent nature the love of art (film in his case) his magnetic lover pretty boy energy, a pretty defined Aesthetic. diplomatic, always looking at things through logic. libra mercury as well for similar reasons, diplomatic and reserved with his words, objective, tries to make everyone happy even at his own expense (hello forgiving/apologizing to audrey and max for all the shit they did lmao). i think he has a pisces moon because i do think he's sensitive and cares deeply and quite dreamy in his own head but not going to be maybe as reactive as a cancer/scorpio moon. they are a lil weird they can kind of be a pushover/doormat, its the vibes. aquarius rising bc he does have the Mysterious Aloof vibes esp if you don't know him, a loner, a bit weird, abstract outlook, nervous. mayhappssss pisces mars bc its again like p romantic and sensitive but they can be kinda hard to pin down and less agressive but i havent Nailed down a venus/mars yet.

audrey: taurus sun i think. i love the idea that two of the sides of their love triangle are represented by venus and i think it fits with them-- both find love very important and have love for each other, but it doesnt really work romantically bc of their diff styles (like personally as a libra loveee them as friends idk if i could really be in a relationship tho). taurus is fixed and resistant to change bc its what they know, ie, her not wanting to move at all. interesting in aesthetics, being classy, etc. wont hold back her judgement (also guessing she has some fire in her bc of how much she lashes out. mayhaps aries or leo). loyal, at least to julien and the idea of friendship and partnership lmao. wants a loyal partner who stays by her side no matter what. also her love of reading and cooking and domesticity is very taurean. this may be bc of her big eyes but i feel like she has a water rising, i think scorpio rising fits best, she can be quite intimidating, she wants privacy, determined, she wants a reliable partner again. can be impatient.

max: leo sun-- im sorry maybe too obvious LMAO but he's just like very charming, confident, wants fun, dramatic af, loves an indulgent moment, wants people to want him. but also i think very warm and nice to his friends when they need it, like going out with julien, or in softer moments like helping audrey with her mom and cooking breakfast for her and aki. leos are also quite funny which i think max is. he's mischevious, he wants vibrance. i also think leo/taurus and leo/libra compatibility make sense for the love triangle lmao. aries moon, likes confrontation, likes drama, want what they want (and often, they have lots of diff crushes) and will go after it. impulsive. want instant gratifcation, to live life charging ahead and in the moment. don't understand skirting around emotions. i think gemini or sag in mars, because of the freedom/independent aspects, fun, and also the sexuality of the mars signs.

monet: capricorn sun and mercury, she knows what she wants, she wants success and power, and shes going to figure out the most effecient way to get there, no matter what. shes going to protect what she cares about most, shes not gonna deal with the bullshit, a bit of a hater of everything. wealth, oppulence. DEFINITELY has a strong scorpio placement / mars energy--probably scorpio mars as at least one placement: ready for war, secretive, observant, calculating. i think maybe aries rising, direct action, competitive, want to lead, blunt and brusque, quick to drop if its not working, with scorpio and cap placements that drive and aggression to be on top increases.

luna: i think she's a virgo sun, she's calculating/discerning, shes a bit judgy, she has rules and order and you're going to fucking follow them! she's observant, able to figure out things like monet's betrayal. def think shes a libra rising, she is so etheral and magnetic, social. while i dont think her libra manifests in a super diplomat way like zoya or aki, i do think she does try to compromise and find balance in certain areas, like going along with the zoya and julien sister narrative and making it work even though she didnt rlly want to. also the style aspect of her character is v libra rising. leo mercury, she's dramatic and fun and has an ego and some u kno.. scathing shit to say lmao.

obie: okay im sorry he is such a fucking toxic pisces male. projecting fantasies onto ppl and then getting upset when they dont fulfill that? yup! mutable as fuck, never really taking a stand in activism, family, love. wanting to be a martyr. staying in situations he doesnt think will work out bc he wants them to--like waiting until he had an excuse to leave julien, or thinking that maybe things werent good with zoya but holding on. hates when ppl critique him. maybe venus in libra bc very idealistic about what he wants in a relationship and wants things done a certain way or else hes like wtf. idc abt his other placements lmfao

#gossip girl #gossip girl spoilers #ask #anon

[topconfessions]

I think its time to stop with the all "if you work hard u will gain anything u lile" cause life most of times its not fair and it doesnt work like this,,for example there was a group that just last 5 FREAKING DAYS!!!! so yep,no matter how hard u try to do certain things it probably wouldnt work out anyway..

This ideal in life globally is a man made corporate elite ideal that was prevalent in the 30s-70s primarily 40s and 50s where the economy in America did flow and revolve around Americans actually gaining the most from simple hard work and living on the straight and narrow. Our society was constructed around that. Women didn't have to work, weren't expected to work or forced to work or grilled / judged in their private lives for not working (unless deemed a gold digger) cause the men were the owns who had to rough it out here being the sole earners while women had to bare the more emotional and abstract difficulties of life at home. No shit y'all can hate me all you want but I honestly wish I was in that era. I don't like the equal playing field we live in today. There are incredible positives and 10x worse downsides to feminism paired with women now being expected to "work as hard" as men do. I'm a woman. I don't want to slave my beauty and youth away as well as my mental health for emotional abuse. Physical abuse, berating, disrespect, my character and intelligence being challenged as well as my my worth being tied into employment in 9-5 / office settings when if there is a man out there who is fit, willing, able and loves me enough to do it....he can go earn. I say this as someone who grew up with someone who was born in the 1940s and tried to raise me very Masculine without realizing it cause in her era that was the only way to make an income. Society didn't teach you or actively allow the keys to extra income, employment, a side hustle or being your own boss happen.

I'd say globally in 2021 and beyond we no longer are built on this ideal. It is obsolete and our economy, structure, sociology and how we function in day to day life does not mesh nor can function on that. Money can be made in all sorts of ways and everyone who makes what you were suppose to slave away for at college, internship and a big job for can make it in 4 months if not 3 if they are monopolizing entertainment (tarot readers making cash, youtubers, becoming a celeb etc) influencers, sex (IG model, sugar baby. Escort, modeling etc) Tik Tok, selling your stuff, becoming a pro seller, getting viral, Delivery food driver, etc. But these require you to not have a need for privacy and humility minus delivery driver and seller.

The sacrifices and gains have changed.

Working hard is for the poor. You work smart. Work cunning, netWORK with the right people, befriend, use, connect and inquire with the right people to get to the next stop, appeal to the right people for what you are aiming for and have enough balls to step outside of the box when everyone rlse is 9-5 and dedicate yourself to whatever it is you are doing.

That old hard work is for people who all live the same life but with different job titles. Everyone complains minimum wage is hell today and 9-5 is a wreck. It is but back during the big boom everybody was flourishing and life was easy.

LMFAO SORRY I GAVE A WHOLE HISTORY LESSON. Point blank you gotta take advantage of things to be successful and work SMART. Hard work is for being dedicated and applying yourself. Kim K got to where she is with by many factors and I will say she is a hard worker but not the traditional ideal of hard work aka manual labor / having to answer to someone. Kim could have easily half assed all her duties and appointments when she was climbing the social ladder. Kardashian's get on my nerves now but I always heard over the years Kim had a great work ethic and is Great to work with.

But yes I agree in general anon.

I mentioned this all cause it occurred to me that the world isn't what it used to be 10-+5 years ago. For instance men have flipped the script on raging feminists who forced us to be equals. Now men want to treat dates like joh interviews unless you're amazingly hot to them or they are desperate to fuck for whatever reason. Now you must have a job, have a job that isn't something shameful or low rate, have something going for you beyond just normal things and if you don't got any of these and you're not hot you get a bunch of bs and potentially get called a free loader who brings nothing to the table. And no this isnt my experience but I have notice men at least in dating apps or dating in areas that is outside of work, church, or a mutual way to meet that gets you close fast, they don't have empathy or a blind eye to women being normal. They do but at the same time they don't??? Like for instance, as someone who gets thousands of matches / swipes on tinder, I've learned you can't be on there if you don't have your life together and can prove you are hardworking at something. I.E if you suddenly lose your job for whatever reason....unless you can skillfully talk around it or make it work for you by being soft about it...men won't give two shits and they approach you like you arent tired from working 42 hours a week etc and can still fuck then clock in on time the next day.

All of this ties into hard work cause you just really need to stay diligent , financially woke and keep going enough to support yourself to survive everyday. Basic needs. Everything else isn't needed. That's all the secrets of hard work.

John Cena was the hardest worker of his time in WWE but he turns me off now cause his character is a highkey secret heel who shoots on people In promos like nobody else works hard or is righteously doing hard work properly cause they aren't work horses like him and tie upstanding image to their work ethic LOL.

Anyways. Hard work is complicated now. I spend too much and don't save but I am a Hard worker and go through what others won't to complete my job but because I may not perform my job in the same way a job favorite does or I may not have a job that is tangible enough for someone to understand why it's hard work, I could get my effort and labor invalidated just because. America has that issue and I don't like it. You rarely hear Koreans have these issue cause everyone across the board has this ingrained in them. Its just a matter of who upholds what value best and who is going beyond what is asked of them.

Eh. Its why I say now college is becoming obsolete in terms of income grind. It is no longer the primary way to gain money. It won't make or break you at all either unless you let it.

I'M DONE LOL.

[babysizedfics]

Poor roman :( but that being said I am heka interested in 5

remus humiliates roman in front of jamal (but jamal is a sweetheart)

vote from this concept voting post!

TWs: swearing, emotional humiliation, arguing, remus is generally pretty mean in this - not "unsympathetic" but his behaviour is not ok, brief alcohol mention but it isnt a main feature

first some background info on remus and ro:

roman and remus' friend groups actually run parallel to each other by pure councidence in that theyre the same age and are both in the local queer scene

usually they only run into each other on nights out and avoid each other like the plague... until one of romans friends and one of remus' friends become a very serious couple and the friendship groups merge

remus tends to hang it over romans head whenever they argue or remus just feels like teasing him that he could so so easily spill romans secret littlespace to all his friends

and while roman claims to not care he also really doesnt want that to happen, especially the specific things remus threatens to reveal (namely him calling his cgs mommy and daddy, and his fear of the dark - which remus knows are romans biggest embarrassments)

and remus never USUALLY actually follows through on his threats, he loves to freak roman out but he doesnt mean to be intentionslly cruel.

but one night theyve had an argument recently and remus is out to hurt roman and finally follows through on his threat to reveal romans secrets. in front of jamal

((the actual incident below the cut))

all the friends are walking back from a night out, and remus hangs back from the group to talk to jamal. roman is just glaring at remus and not saying anything and holding jamals hand tightly. remus hasnt embarrassed him too bad so far, just asking jamal questions and referring to roman as his "baby brother" which is so annoying, but the thing is roman can tell hes building up to something

then suddenly remus smirks when he sees a completely pitch black side street thats theyre about to pass by, and he calls out to everyone "hey guys, there's a 24/7 mcdonalds through here and its a shortcut to the bus stop" and everyones like WOO mcdonalds and redirects to go down the side street

and romans heart pounds watching the friends all filter down the street without a second thought, theres no streetlights down there, theres light on the other side quite far away, but before that its SO DARK. and he freezes in place and jamal is tugged back by it and looks back at him. "babe, come on"

romans starting to feel shaky and he literally cant move his feet. his eyes flick between the street and remus' sadistic cocky smirk.

"whats wrong baby bro? you stuck or something?" remus leers with that stupid stupid smirk

and roman HATES him so so much

"ro, what's the matter?" jamal asks

"i- um," roman stutters, trying to keep his voice from shaking too much at the sight of his friends just having DISAPPEARED into the darkness - how are they okay with that?? "i- im not hungry"

"okay well i am, and remus said it was a shortcut anyway so-"

"i-i -- no i can't"

seraphina, romans best friend, looks back and notices whats happening and quickly jogs over (knowing roman is scared of the dark) "hey roma, it's okay we dont have to go down there" she soothes

jamal is supportive but he doesnt get it. he thinks roman is scared of criminals or smth. "i promise theres no one bad down there, hun. and i'll be right next to you the whole time, i'll protect you" and he smiles and tugs romans hand to pull him towards the side street

romans eyes quickly tear up and he panics and rambles "nononono dont please please i cant i cant" in a broken voice and plants his feet firmly on the ground, paralysed with fear

remus starts cackling "ohhhhh thats right~" as if he just remembered. "my baby brother's terrified of the dark, isn't he?"

"f*ck off, re" sera barks, standing between the twins, protective of roman

"wait, are you?" jamal asks sounding surprised. roman doesnt let himself look at him, too busy watching remus warily and knowing thats not all he has planned to embarrass roman

remus goes on, shouting out to jamal over sera's head "he's petrified!" he confirms sounding delighted. "yknow that massive blackout last summer? he cried like a baby. literally sobbing for his daddy patton to make it go away"

theres a brief silence because no, sera and jamal didnt expect remus to refer to patton as romans daddy - they both know roman calls him dad but this is a surprise.

and that one second of silence drags on for ages for roman, all he can hear is his heart pounding in his ears and remus' obnoxious laughter

he is shaking, frozen in shock rather than fear now. for all of remus' teasing threats at home, he didnt expect remus to actually do it. hes devastated and humiliated that remus told to his best friend and especially his BOYFRIEND of all ppl

and honestly he's not even thinking about the pitch black side street right now because the streetlights on the main road are blurred by tears welling in his eyes anyway

"why dont you just leave him alone!" sera hisses furiously after her mild shock

then jamal bounces back rlly stern to remus "yeah i already know about that! roman told me and it was HIS choice to tell me"

roman stares at him in disbelief but jamal is too busy staring daggers at remus to notice

remus looks suddenly offended and frowns. hes clearly hurt that the others dont think its funny "jeez youre both such bores. im just having some fun"

"youre demented if you think thats fun" seraphina growls and shoves remus away towards the sidestreet. remus rolls his eyes and runs ahead to join the others who are all oblivious to that coversation, howling with drunken laughter in the pitch black and jumping out and scaring each other

"f*cking prick" jamal calls after remus, seething

sera quickly throws a concerned look to roman "you okay?"

roman just swallows thickly and looks between seraphina and where he saw remus join the others in the pitch black. his stomach churns at the idea of remus telling more people. "i-is he gonna--"

"im on it" sera nods and starts turning around "i wont let him tell anyone else, roma, promise" then she runs ahead to keep an eye on remus and to give him and jamal some privacy

after a moment jamal turns back to roman looking so worried and holds his hands and asks very gently "babe, can you tell me how youre feeling?"

and roman is teary but he whispers "i - you stuck up for me"

jamal looks suddenly sad and cups romans cheek "of course i did"

"but you said i told you about it. i- i didnt tell you that i-" roman gulps after his voice wobbles "i didnt tell you about it"

and jamal smiles sadly and goes "i know babe... im sorry, i just didnt wanna give him any more power. it seemed like he's held that over you for a while"

suddenly the tears in romans eyes overspill and he doesnt really know why but he can't stop them

jama gasps a little "oh roman, its ok" and just pulls him into a tight hug

roman clings and sniffles, glad that he can hide his tears from his boyfriend even if it is in his neck.

and jamal just strokes his back and whispers "its ok baby, its ok" **

they talk about it quietly as they take the longer, well-lit route instead. roman admits he would never have told jamal abt his fear on his own - and the reason he's been avoiding staying overnight at jamals apartment is bc the one time he did he got so scared of the dark that he couldnt sleep and was just anxious all night but wouldnt wake jamal to tell him

after jamal finds out hes like baby why didnt u tell me its okay and comforts him about it not being embarrassing or childish. then:

"so you do actually want to stay at mine, its just because its so dark that you didnt?"

roman nods shyly "yeah... im sorry i know its a dumb fear i just-"

"its not dumb ro. i meant to say if it works for you, we could leave the hall light on and the door open. its not like i live with anyone who can walk in."

roman blinks "wait you - really? it wont make it hard for you to sleep?"

jamal smiles softly "no hun, honestly i could sleep anywhere. i fell asleep in the middle of the day in the staffroom just last month"

roman laughs, so so so relieved

"so... maybe next time you come over for dinner you could stay the night, yeah?" jamal says with a smile and a blush. he wraps his arm around romans waist and pulls him in, hip to hip

roman bites his lip and blushes. after a moment he suggests shyly "im free tonight..."

and jamal smiles so big, stops walking and puts his arm up to romans chest to stop him too then angles romans jaw down to kiss him

in the near future jamal promises to buy a plain nightlight and always leaves it on for roman when he stays overnight from then on

**side note: roman could never stand anyone calling him baby before because he felt infantilised at school becaus of his undiagnosed adhd. so he sees it as a derogatory name more than anything. but when jamal says it roman feels so warm and respected because he knows jamal would never mean it in that way. so jamal has "baby" rights basically

#swearing tw #little angst #long post #chaotic cousin remus #little/big concepts #asks #tumblebee the smol bean

[wolferals]

✨UNDER MY SKIN(S)✨

james cook x reader

„Y/n, friend." your mom shouted from downstairs. You were still busy with your english homework as you got interrupted. A sigh leaving your lips you got up from your desk to walk down to the door. Who of your friends would show up on a Tuesday night at 9pm when they knew you were busy doing schoolwork?

As your head shot around the corner you let out a frustrated moan.

The brown haired boy grinned sheepishly as he had his hands behind his back. „Cook." you spoke and approached the interrupter of your busy night.

„Hello y/n. Looking stunning."

Looking down at yourself you realized you were only wearing a big sweatshirt and some knitted socks to keep you feet warm. You were not wearing pants at all, and your hair was up in a messy bun.

„What do you want? I'm busy." You snapped at him but he just kept on smiling.

„I wanted to see if you were up for some fun. Freds and J are twats and studying for the exam tomorrow. Eff's a bit of a headache at the moment and Naomikins wont answer the door." He explained and rested his arm on the doorframe.

„Cook, as I said, I'm busy."

He made his lip tremble a bit, making you roll your eyes at him. „Come on y/n/n, just for an hour or two. I promise I dont got any drugs this time. I just dont wanna be alone right now. I'm going through something."

You again rolled your eyes at this jackass and joked:"Did Effy not wanna fuck you tonight? I'm really sorry. But fuck, fine. I just gotta get dressed. Come in and close the door behind you."

Like a little kid he let out a happy laugh as you walked upstairs, noticing that Cook was following you.

„Hello? Privacy? Also my mom won't like you being in my room with me, at that time especially."

He closed the door to your room and started looking around while you rummaged through your closet.

„You got a nice room y/n/n. Why havent I been in here?"

He asked and played with your dreamcatcher.

„Well because you're a dick Cookie? And I dont like dicks in my room."

-„Thats cool, but hey now you got one in your room. A big one. One that could make you feel real good."

He started laughing and pointed at his crotch. „Fuck you Cook. Turn around."

You quickly took off your sweater and threw on a white cardigan and paired it with a pair of some wide legged jeans.

„Okay I'm done." you then spoke and watched Cook scan your body from head to toe. „Looks cute."

You were surprised by his choice of words but didn't complain. Smiling, you grabbed your stuff and you two headed downstairs.

„Mom, I'll have to help Cook with something real quick, I'll be back in an hour."

You were about to open the front door when your mom stood in the hall. „Where are you going?" She asked, a serious expression on her face.

„Just around the block. I promise I'll be back soon."

Cook just stood there and watched you and your mom discuss but suddenly spoke up:"Ms y/l/n, I promise I'll have her back in exactly one hour. I'll take care of her, nothing will happen to your daughter I swear."

You stared at him in disbelief. That Cook new words like „I promise" or „I'll take care" shocked you a bit.

„Fine. One hour. You have a test tomorrow sweetheart, have that in mind." Your mom finally let you go and Cook didnt waste any more time slipping through the door outside, pulling you with him.

„Wow your mum seems..."

-„I know." you scoffed and shut the door.

Cook took a deep breath as well.

„So you ready for the exam tomorrow?" He then asked.

Walking down the dark street you shrugged your shoulders at him. „I think so but to be honest I was too tired to make anything stay in my brain tonight."

He laughed lightly and replied:"Welcome to my world."

You gave him a quick glance before continuing to walk through the darkness.

It didnt make you uncomfortable being with Cook, even though in fact this was your first time being alone. You simply didn't know what to say to him. He was just too different from you.

„You wanna have some fun?" He broke the silence suddenly as you two walked towards a big building.

„Sure; whats that though?"

He gave you a devilish smirk. „Ever really partied before?"

You shook your head while Cook grabbed your hand to pull you towards the building. His hand was bigger than yours. And it was warm, it felt nice holding someone's hand. You'd never had a boyfriend to touch you but that little thing you got from him there was really nice though.

„Cook what is this place?" you asked when the red lights hit you right in the face. „You're gonna love it." He smiled at you, still holding your hand.

Once down in the basement you two met a bunch of people lining up in front of a big door.

You spotted a bouncer at front letting certain people in.

„I just need you to do one thing. Could you please flirt with that man so we can get in easier? They dont really like me here that much, you need to work with those."

Cook pointed at your boobs.

„Are you kidding?" You asked him, not believing a word he just said. „Please, I really think you'd like it, plus we dont got too much time left. I need to get you home in 40 minutes so just show him your tits and we can have some fun."

You scoffed at him but eventually pulled him up to the bouncer. The guy was around 25, attractive he was for sure but you didnt really know what to say.

„Oh you again, why dont you fuck off?" He looked at Cook.

You gave Cookie a serious look and then turned back to the bouncer. „Hi, I'm sorry I've never been here before; and my friend just told me I'd have a lot of fun in there. Dont you think you could let us in, please?" You gave him your puppy eyes and lightly bit your lip.

He looked inbetween you two and spoke:"This your girlfriend?" He was obviously speaking to Cook.

He just shook his head and you answered:"No sir he's not. We're just here to have fun. I promise we won't be here for long, just a bit of fun. Please sir?"

He breathed out and opened the door behind you. „Alright then sweetheart. And you, dont come here again after tonight." Cook grinned and pulled me inside the club, speaking a „cheers" to the bouncer before coming closer to my ear due to the loud music.

„Promise one thing y/n. Have fun. Let it all go and be free. Just for now."

You looked up at him, his face being lit by the colorful lights. He again smiled at you. „I promise." was all you said before basically jumping into the middle of the dance floor and letting yourself go. A upbeat song was playing and you just started jumping and dancing with Cook as if there was no tomorrow. He seemed to enjoy it as much as you did because he was laughing. You'd never seen him so cheerful and genuinely happy.

„Cookie?" you yelled against the loud music and grabbed onto his neck. „Thank you so much for bringing me here!"

He nuzzled his head in your neck and placed a soft kiss against your skin. „Just let go." You held onto his neck and danced with him again. His forehead rested against yours and your eyes kept locked. It felt like the world around you two had stopped. It felt like Cook and you were the only thing that mattered, as if it cured every worry in your body.

And before you could think about it, you pulled him close and placed your lips onto his. He kissed you back immediately but his kiss was different than you'd expected. It was softer, much more passionate that you'd ever imagined. His hands grabbed you by the waist until you let go of him and smiled brightly.

„Take me home Cook." He licked his lips and nodded as you two made your way through the crowd to the exit door.

Once the noise had quiet down and the only thing you could feel was your own heavy heartbeat and the cold air hitting you, you leaned against the wall. Cook did the same and let out a soft giggle.

„Did you have fun?" He asked and turned his head to look at you. „A lot." You smiled happily.

„Good. Yeah, good."

He stepped closer and placed both his hands on the wall next to your head. He looked down at you and licked his lips once again. „We still got 19 minutes. Sure you wanna go home now?"

Before you got to answer he had kissed you again. It felt too good to be true, his lips moving in perfect sync with yours. His hand on your neck and your hands in his hair.

He truly was a fantastic kisser.

And yet again, the world around you had stopped. Cook was the only thing that mattered to you and deep down you knew how wrong it all was but Cook made you feel worth it. Made you feel good about yourself.

After he let go of you, he grabbed your hand once again and you two slowly walked back to your house without saying another word.

You only caught him looking at you every now and then.

But as you stood in front of your house you turned to him and said:"Thank you Cook, I had a lot of fun in that just one hour." He laughed and replied:"Good. Im glad that I could at least make someone happy tonight."

You giggled as well before looking around to see if your mom was by any chance watching you. But the lights were off and the blinds were shut so you looked back at Cook and placed another quick kiss on his lips.

He didnt seem to be having it, so he pulled you even closer to have a proper harder kiss this time.

„I'll see you tomorrow then?" He asked and put a strand of hair behind your ear. „You see that balcony? Left window is mine. Next time make sure my mom doesnt see you."

He laughed his significant cook laugh and nodded. „Understood. But how soon would be too soon? I mean would it be inappropriate to show up in, lets say 10 minutes?"

-„Cook I'm really not the girl to..."

He grabbed your head and spoke:"No, no I just dont wanna go home yet and I wanna cuddle a bit. I'd be gone before your mum could notice anything."

„Cuddle" Cook wanted to cuddle, that was a first.

„Goodnight cook. See you tomorrow."

He nodded, let go of your hand and walked a couple of steps closer to the street.

„Its really warm tonight, I'll have to air out my room a bit though." you hinted and smiled at him before stepping inside the house. Before closing the front door you saw Cook smiling happily at you before looking up to your room for you to open the window for him. This boy was up for some closure he'd never had before.

#jamescook #skins #jack o’connell #cute #preference #preferences #imagine #relationship #love #bristol #e4 #i'mcook

[nad-zeta]

Hi! Can i ask for an hc where mc doesnt show much emotion? Like, her mom would gets mad at her when she cried, saying things like 'you dont have anything to be sad about' eventually mc didnt show emotions much in fear no one would care and fear of everyone is just putting up with her? She would break down alone. Im sorry, this is one placei can think of to have my heart comforted. I would be thankful for all warlords, if cant, i would like nobunaga, mitsuhide, kenshin,shingen and hideyoshi. TY💕

Hi love! Sorry for taking sooo long with this HC (>ლ)! I hope you are doing well! Sending you all the loves and hugs (´∩｡• ᵕ •｡∩`) ♡ ! And just know for anyone who needs to hear this... that its okay to show emotions, no one is going to think less of you, and trust me when I say there are people who care about you and would be there for you to wipe away every tear and listen to every complaint during your breakdowns! You are not alone dear! And for all those who feel like they have no one and need to vent I'm always here for ya loves (◍•ᴗ•◍)♡ ✧*。 don't be shy to pop me a message even if ya just wanna chat (◕‿◕✿)

Okay so onto the headcanon, thanks so much for the request dear! I hope you have a wonderful day and I hope you enjoy it! ❤🌼

Headcanon: MC afraid of showing emotion/too scared to cry in front of Nobunaga, Kenshin, Hideyoshi and Mitsuhide 

Nobunaga

Nobunaga absolutely loved you (｡◕‿◕｡)

He loved everything about you, from the way you walked to the cute way you scrunched up your nose when you laugh, EVERYTHING

When it came to emotions the two of you didn’t show much to the world but when your were together it was easy to drop the mask and be yourself

Except, what Nobunaga didn’t know was that you had to endure years of mental and emotional abuse from your mom

As a child you never cried cause, heaven forbid, that tear slip from your eye in front of her, all hell would break loose

(┛ಠДಠ)┛彡┻━┻

She would lose her shit and scream at you that she would give you something to cry about if you did not stop

As of late you have been feeling a little down, and you were finding it harder and harder to push down those feelings bubbling up inside

You quickly retired to a secluded part of the garden, and made your way to your favourite bench

You weren’t even sitting there 2 seconds and the tears started to stream down your face  (ಥ﹏ಥ)

Gosh if your mother could see you now she would have a field day

Nobunaga’s meeting had ended early, and he was eager to spend some time with his beloved fireball (◠‿◠✿)

He spotted you sitting in your favourite spot in the garden and made his way towards you

As he got closer he heard and saw something he had never in the year of knowing you, seen or heard before

YOU WERE CRYING

He was by your side in a flash

He crouched down in front of you and took both your hands in his

“Tell me fireball, what is the matter, I will make the problem disappear in an instant.”

What Nobunaga didn’t expect was that you would remove your hands from his and cover your face. “I'm fine, don't worry about me.”

“You cannot lie to me my dear queen, now tell me why do you insist on hiding your pain from me, have you already forgotten you are mine and I am yours. Our hearts beat as one. So tell me fireball what had burdened that sweet heart of yours”, Nobungas voice was as demanding as ever, but it held a kind and comforting warmth and in his eyes, you could see nothing but love and worry for you

You had told him the reason you never cry or show emotion to the outside world and in an instant you were in Nobunaga’s arms being carried to his room

He gently cradled you face in his hands and whispered against your lips “I am not your mother and to me you can cry freely” he then kissed you

It was a kiss filled with so much love and emotion

“Whenever something is troubling your fireball or whenever you feel like crying come to me, so I can kiss away your tears.”  (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )

Nobunaga spent the rest of that night showing you just how much he loved and adored you (¬‿¬)

Mitsuhide

He saw the look on your face during the banquet

The way your mask had faltered and slipped for a split second (¬_¬)

He knew you were hiding something from him, a painful detail of your past

He told himself he would wait, wait for you to open up to him on your own, but the look you had on your face during the banquet was breaking his sneki boi heart  （>﹏<）

He could see you bite your lip in frustration to keep the tears from falling

He knows you had, had a long week, there was always so much work for everyone to do when important daimyos came to visit

As princess of the Oda forces, it was your job to keep the cups of the guests full, however these were particularly nasty guests, who had flung rude comment towards you for the whole duration of their stay

And TBH Mitsuhide was getting sick of it, in fact, all the warlords were fuming on your behalf (ಠ ∩ಠ)

Mitsuhide stalked over to Nobunaga and whispered something in his ear, out of the corner of your eyes, you saw him give a small nod

Mitsuhide in a flash was now beside you, he gently took the bottle of sake from your hands and placed it on the table

He then carefully took hold of your wrist and lead you out of the banquet hall

He leads you onto the balcony and closed the doors to give the two of you some privacy

Golden eyes stared down at you, he could see it in your eyes, the pain and sadness you felt, his heart broke at the sight of your quivering lips tying to chock down and mask your emotions  ( ͡ಥ ͜ʖ ͡ಥ)

You tried to say that you were fine, but the second you moved your lips to speak a tear slipped out from the corner of your eye

You turned around and covered you face with your hands repeating over and over how sorry you were  (つд⊂)

“Please, Mitsu, please don’t hate me.”

Mitsuhides heart broke, hate you? Why he loved you more than anything in the world

He snaked his arms around your waist and rested his head on your shoulders whispering in your ears “Why would I ever hate you, my dearest little mouse, for you are my light in this dark world, you are my soulmate and the keeper of my heart. I could never ever, ever hate you little one.”

He gently turned you around in his arms and rested his forehead on yours

He gave your nose a little kiss, an action which makes you chuckle a little

(/‿＼✿)

“My dearest little one, would you dare to tell me, why it is that I would ever hate someone as wonderful as you” he said while nuzzling his nose against yours

You hid your face in the crook of his neck and took in his warm scent, and quietly muttered what your mother had been telling you your whole life

Mitsuhide quietly listened, taking in every word, dropping smalled kisses on your cheek and hair   (´•ω•｀)♡

His tightened his embrace on you the second you mentioned that you were scared that he would hate and leave you if you cried in front of him, or cause him unnecessary trouble 

When your story was done Mitsuhide cradled your cheeks in his hands, he urged you up to meet his eyes, he then kissed your forehead, nose and finally lips  (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )

“My dear, you have been caught by a kitsune, and I’m afraid you can never leave, I will never hate or feel inconvenienced by you, my dear, and I would never leave you. To me crying or showing emotion isn’t a sign of weakness; it is a strength. You have no need to fear showing your emotions around me, my love, especially the sad and bad ones, for wherever you are feeling down, I will wrap you in my arms just like this” and as he said that, he moved to snake his arms around your waist once more, and leaned in close to whisper in your ear, ”And then I will do this”

He then started to shower your face, neck and shoulders in small ticklish kisses, while his hands moved to tickle your sides (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

You bust out into laughter “Stop Mitsu, haha, mercy, haha, mercy.”

He then gave your lips one final kiss and traced his fingertips on your tear-stained cheeks

“I truly love you, my dear, please never hide your emotions from me again.”  (/^-^(^ ^*)/

Kenshin

Kenshin was away fighting and you were left with Sasuke and Yuki to hold down the fort

You were feeling a little sad and upset lately and you were definitely missing the bunny warlord (⁎˃ᆺ˂)

You were hanging out with Yuki and Sasuke at one of the tea houses and you just couldn’t shake the feelings of loneliness and sadness

You could feel your eyes begin to sting, and you knew you needed to get away (つд⊂)

You quickly excused yourself and said that you weren’t feeling well

Sasuke and Yukimura gave each other a worried look

“Should we go after her?” “I think its best if we leave her be, besides I heard lord Kenshin will be home this afternoon”, they gave each other a nog and continued to chat over tea

You wandered back to the castle, your heart was feeling heavy, you kept your tears in until you made it to your room

You walked through the door of your and Kenshin’s shared room and the second the door closed behind you you bust into tears

‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

You slid down the door and curled yourself up into a ball and cried

How many time have you done this before, quietly breaking down and sobbing in the silence of your room  ๐·°(৹˃̵﹏˂̵৹)°·๐

Careful not to make a sound, even though your mother was 500 years in the future, the words she would say to you when she caught you crying, stilled ringed in your ears

“Stop it, you silly girl, or I'll give you something to cry about. If you keep it up no one will like you. No one likes people who cry they are annoying. If you don’t learn to toughen up, you will never have any friends.” ☜(`o´)

You covered your ears hoping to block out the noise

Kenshin had come back early and quickly made his way to your shared room to change

He was so excited to see his little bunny

He heard the door of your room open and shut

He was about to step out from behind the changing screen to surprise you, when he heard the sound of your soft whimpers  ∑(ΦдΦlll

His heart broke into pieces, why were your crying, how dare hurt his beloved goddess of war, whoever caused his beloved upset will pay with their lives  ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)=ε/̵͇̿̿/'̿̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿

He strode out from behind the changing screen to see you huddled into a small ball with your hand covering your ears  (ノ′Дヾ)

He quietly made his way up to you and before you knew it you were enveloped in his warmth ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

He held you tight pressing your head into his chest

“Hush, my little bunny, I’m home, what has caused you so much grief, for I vow to cut down anyone who dare hurt the love of my life.”

You tried to calm yourself down, to stop crying but the more you tried to put a lid back on your emotions the more they came pouring out

You and Kenshin had a very open and honest relationship and just as you have destroyed and chased away his demon, it is now his turn to do the same for you

He soothingly pulled his fingers through your hair and kissed the top of your head “It’s okay, I’m here, I’m here, you are okay, just listen to the sound of my heartbeat”

When you managed to calm down a little you told him about your mother and how you were never allowed to cry as a child, as that was perceived as weakness  (つ﹏<)･ﾟ｡

Kenshin simply remained silent as you hiccuped your way through the story, he traced soothing circles on your back as you continued to speak and he gave you a few small pecks to encourage you to keep going

The bunnies must have sensed that you were feeling down as sometime during your story, an avalanche of fluff huddled around the two of you

Each nuzzling their little noses against you as if to try and comfort you in their own way  

(ㅇㅅㅇ❀)

“My love your mother is wrong, it is not a weakness to cry or show emotion and no one will think less of you if you do.”

He then like his bunnies started nuzzling his nose into your hair and kissed the top of your head “I love you with my whole heart and soul, did you already forget the promise we made my love.”

Kenshin gently wiped away the few remaining tears and kissed the tip of your nose

“Ahh I see my sweet goddess of war has forgotten,.” He rested his forehead on yours and gave you a little Eskimo kiss

“Remember when I was still battling with the demons in my head, we made a.. what do you call it again… a yes, a pinky promise… to always hold and listen to one another problems, to envelop each other in a comforting embrace, to face all challenges together and to love each other for eternity no matter what.

Kenshin the gave you the biggest brightest smile and carried you to the futon where the two of you spent the rest of the day cuddled in each other’s arms and surrounded by the love of your fluff army 

♡｡ﾟ.(*♡´‿` 人´‿` ♡*)ﾟ♡ °・

Hideyoshi

You were having a horrible day

Everything just seemed to be going wrong

As you started walking back to Hideyioshi’s manor, Nobunaga could sense something was off, so he dragged you with him on one of his candy runs

THB the candy did lift your spirits, but all of that was in vain the second your lover stepped into the kitchen, to catch you and Nobu crunching down on candy

When you turned to look, Nobunaga was gone without a trace leaving you to deal with being lectured on your own

As Hideyoshi lectured you about sugar and the dangers of eating too much of it, all the memories and troubles of the day started coming back and burdening your heart

You could feel the tears start to well up and your throat start to constrict

You needed to get out of there

Halfway through the lecture, you started running, you didn’t want Hideyoshi to see you cry, you didn’t want to burden him with your feelings

ᕕ(ಥʖ̯ಥ)ᕗ

And you most definitely didn’t want to trouble him

You ran all the way back home locking yourself in your shared room

Hideyoshi knocked on the door, to your shared bedroom ಠ╭╮ಠ

You forgot that you had a spare key in the pot pant down the hall

Hideyoshi slowly made his way into the room

He saw you in the corner of the room hugging your legs, tear streaming down your face 

｡･ﾟﾟ･(>д<)･ﾟﾟ･｡

“I’m sorry if I was a little harsh on you love, most of that lecture was actually meant for Nobunaga”, Hideyoshi made his way towards you and eyed you apologetically

Although the second you locked eyes with Hideyoshi, he could see that it was more than just the lecture on your mind

He sat down beside you and pulled you into his lap  (>^_^)><(^o^<)

“Tell me what’s bothering you love, I may not always be able to read your expressions very well, but I can always tell when something is bothering you”

You had told him of your past and why you don’t give away much with your facial expressions 

(つ﹏⊂)

“You know you can always come to me with any problem right, I would never judge you for crying or showing emotion.”

You gave Hideyoshi a small nod, but his MOTHER MODE had been activated and he was now determined to do whatever it took to bring that smile back to your face (◕‸ ◕✿)

He picked you up and walked you to the bathroom where the two of you had a nice warm bubble bath together

He then cooked you your favourite meal and held you in his arms the entire night (◕‿◕✿)

That night in his arms you allowed yourself to cry, you had bottled up your emotions for so long, but with Hideyoshi, you felt safe.

You allowed yourself to show him you every sadness and insecurity, and he accepted all of it ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

He would sit and listen to you while gently rubbing your back

Whenever new tears would stream down your face, he wipes them away leaving a trail of kisses in their wake

Finally, with Hideyoshi, you allowed yourself to drop the mask and show your true emotions, as you felt safe and warm and his arm, and most importantly with Hideyoshi, you always felt loved (⺣◡⺣)♡*

Thanx for the request love! I hope you enjoyed it! (*^.^*)

#ikemen sengoku headcan #ikemen sengoku headcanons #ikesen headcanons #ikesen headcanon #headcanon ikemen #ikesen hc #ikemen sengoku hc #ikemen sengoku nobunaga #ikesen nobunaga #oda nobunaga #ikemen sengoku mitsuhide #mitsuhide akechi #ikesen mitsuhide #toyotomi hideyoshi #ikesen hideyoshi #uesugi kenshin #kenshin uesugi #kenshin ikemen sengoku #ikesen kenshin

[strawberryspeachy]

My mom always used to say that it was good that we had mice - because it meant that we didnt have rats.

My family told this story over and over about my uncle waking up and finding a rat on his bed - it was when he decided he really needed to move

I was thinking about how the time we left, i heard rats in the walls.... just sliding down the fucking wall. And id bang on it to make them go away. For a moment i remembered it as just normal

But it wasnt. Most of my life at my house, we didnt have rats. And i was mortified when they showed up

But i just... got used to it. It bothered me... and i didnt like seeing them in the kitchen at night...but i just.... dealt with it

A hole appeared on my ceiling in the last couple years - it was the size of a the ink in a pen. My mother kept spilling stuff and it would pour into my room. I was fighting with her over it.

She broke everything that wasnt broken in the house. I started taping up the walls and the floors to keep the wolf spiders in the basement and out of rooms that i sat in

I was terried to clean the house because i knew at any moment a giant spider could come running out of where i was cleaning

The animals pissing and shitting everywhere could be changed if people didnt allow them. Shit being caked into the floorboards could be changed in my grandfather gave a fuck.

I can never show ppl the horrors that i saw because i never took pictures. I just got sick it was every few months and immediately started to clean. I didnt want to prolong the experience or resentment by taking pictures...

I didnt want to leave that house. It was my home. It will always be my home.

My creepy smelly haunted ancient falling apart infested home.

The toilets were like the first plumbing ever made when we moved in. There was black seaweed like stuff swimming at the bottom. It would overflow everytime you flushed it and pour through the living room ceiling...

he windows were disgusting and dirty and they didnt stay up on theirg own

My rooms floor was seperating from the wall. There was cat litter behind the radiator that no matter how hard i cleaned - i coildnt get - a reminder of my 18 year old cats habbits

The back door was broken. My mom put plastic on it which the cats ripped open to jump through like a doggy door - scaring the life out of me. The glass door past it didnt shut - my mom tied a leash to it and kept it closed that way. It would swing open with the wind and creek.

The ghosts scared me

The sheds were falling apart

The barn had carpenter bees

The hayfeild was next to the turnpike and two other major roads... it was loud and there was no privacy

The third feild was mostly marshland

The property was full of poisonous plants that could paralyze you and picky weeds that burned if they touched you. The small little feild at the bottom always had too many bees

The backyard sloped

But there was so much beauty. Though the crick was drying up from the houses built on the other side of the hill - i remembered the ducks and filling up water buckets and daydreaming in the tree above. Trying to get accross the rocks and my dog drinking. The big stream where i went swimming and once saw a lobster. The feild was open - multiflora rose gone to the hungry goats over the years. The trees that used to be apple trees where i sat and ate till i was full and the spot where my favorite one stood - where my mom and i had picnics.

That feeling from the back feild tbat felt like true serenity and the cool sheild from the summer heat beneath the congested bit of pine trees.

I remember my trecks down the crick - trying to jump from rock to rock

And the time i tried to stand on the ice where the marsh was - enjoying watching my family ice skate before falling and hurting my head

The quiet snowy nights that i sled down the hayfeild with my aunt

The warm fluffy feeling of a barn FULL of animals.

The sheds that alternated as storage or more room for more animals.

The path i used to take up to the barn before everything on the path fell apart

Id walk around and find peices.... things.... that my mom, me, or someone in my family had set down.... not knowing that it would never be picked up again

Our animal graveyard.... because we loved them so much...

The reminince where the big light used to shine over the ducks and backyard - when we had night parties with candles and tents and all the normal stuff a family has

The back of the house leading to the basement where my first dog used to live and my personal garden leading up to it

The dog yard with the table - the first place i played with my greatgrandmothers dog before we moved into the house

The comfort of my parking lot - knowing that im finally home

Driving to the top of the hill before getting there and looking down on my property- the send setting over the lake so beautifully.

My house was in ruins.... all my momories were there. All the love.... you could find peices of it everywhere

So i was just thinking.... how there were rats in my walls... but they ended up being just an annoying addition that i didnt put much thought into

Because id put up with a lot to keep something i love....

And idk what to do about it. Without my pets it was already hard. Watching everything i knew and loved break fall apart and be abandoned... was hard for a number of years. The place doesnt mean so much witout my animals and family - all the love that made it was a warm place. Even if i could have afforded to keep it... it wouldnt be a nice place to be alone...

But it all went so fast... just like my mom.... and i still dont know how to face that.

I always dream that im there. I always dream im with my mom.

I cant make another place full of love and warmth.... without everything and everyone that is was lost at that house....

Although its a skeliton now it still encapsulates those memories...: and while it hurt to keep remembering things that were gone... now i remember them but its not tangible

[reeesea]

Something Sweet: Part Three

~sweet beginnings~

one ~ two ~ three ~ four ~ five ~ six ~ seven ~ eight ~ nine

pairing: minsung, jisung/minho

warning: mild language 

words: 2.5k ish

summary: sweet beginnings and small apartments, also Seungmin baby shows up 

a/n: Im honestly just proud of myself for posting a third chapter woo!! lemme know if you read and enjoyed <3

also the spacing got wack trying to do the text convos, so hope the bold and non bold isn't too gross to look at. Minho and Jisung

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Minho wakes up to the sun streaming in through the thinly veiled curtains over his window. Thankfully he woke up to a minimal headache in spite of having gone out to the bar and an impromptu concert the night before. Rolling over in his small twin sized bed he reached for his phone to check the time and any potentially important notifications. 

9:26 am 

[ 2 new messages from Rich Boy Han Jisung ]

Minho finds himself smiling at the new messages from the boy that had stumbled upon him last night. 

2:25 am

Youre right I do hear it all the time

but it sounds pretty sweet coming from you ;} 

I'll tell J.One you thought he was amazing

9:28 am

Careful Han, your cockiness is showing

Jisungs’s cocky demeanor does nothing but make him more endearing to the older, but something gave Minho the impression that the boy already knew this. Not expecting a reply from the other this early in the morning, Minho stretched out of bed and made his way out of his small bedroom and quietly to the shared bathroom. Not a small feat in the old apartment shared by him and his roommates. Creaky floorboards, squeaky doors, and over all close proximity to each other makes being quietly courteous in the morning a frequent challenge for the boys. 

The living room at the end of the small hallway was turned into a shared bedroom for Minho's two roommates. Felix’s mattress had gotten a bed frame from some trading website a few months back when he moved in. The makeshift wall of hung shower curtains and a fold out screen gave the boys the illusion of privacy between their respective sides of the room. Even though more times than not, Minho has come home to find the lanky brunette curled up in Felix's bed instead of on his designated couch. 

Climbing over the piles of the boys’ clothes, Minho makes it to the bathroom without disturbing the other two. The two were still passed out from working their night shifts, draped over each other on the freckled boy’s bed. Neither showed signs of awakening any time in the morning hours. Minho showered quickly and changed in order to make his way out of the apartment and on his way to the studio to practice his Saturday away

Minho would have thought that the both of them would have remained in their university dorms for the summer, if they weren’t able to find apartments on their own. But, at some point after he had graduated, he had gained himself plus two of his underclassmen as roommates. He really couldn't complain though, it all made sense as all three of them were a part of the same dance studio, barely a block away, and all had reasons to be saving money. Paying a fraction of rent really helped with all that had to be saved in order to pay for school, studio fees, living, breathing, and most importantly audition fees. 

As the summer had set in, so had the wave of audition opportunities for companies and crews. Felix had mentioned needing to prepare a video audition last week for a few entertainment companies in the area. Hyunjin was busy trying to save up his money to pay for the upcoming semesters at school to graduate like Minho had. 

Entering the practice room and being welcomed by the distinctive scent of a dance studio was enough to bring Minho back to reality. Since graduating, he had been stuck in his thoughts about what to do with his future a lot. His childhood dreams of getting into the prestigious Yellow Wood Dance Academy seemed to slip farther away from him with every passing year. His audition tapes each year during university were almost always sent back, along with a ‘We are sorry to inform you…’

 It’s not like Minho couldn't keep applying, but with every year the rejection stung a little bit more, and he wasn't sure if he would be able to take another blow. No matter how confident Minho acted about his looks, when it came to dancing his ego was glass fragile. His passion for dance sometimes felt like the only thing that kept him standing, but it had been a while since he had felt rewarded for his dedication. Even when his practically broken dream haunted him a little too much, focusing back to his craft really gave him a better grasp on reality. Making his way to the front of the room to plug in his phone to pick music, a new notification popped up. 

[Rich Boy Han Jisung]

10:03am 

dw dw its all fake i assure you, all just a ploy to get you to like me

What you up to on this fineee saturday mornin??

Hmmm wouldnt you like to know 

i only tell boys i like so...

Minho smiled in spite of himself. Even over text the sparkly eyed boy was able to pull out and dust off his genuine smile. It had definitely been a while since Minho had found himself freely smiling, but here comes Han Jisung crash landing into his life, running amuck. After spending a moment debating whether or not just to tell the younger of his activities anyway, he came to the conclusion that mentioning dance would only result in more questions, and Minho really wasn't feeling like spilling his passions and dreams with the other already.

Haha i am only even more motivated now >:D

Dont strain yourself too much with that, 

im just enjoying my saturday before my shift later.

Queuing up some music Minho migrated to the middle of the room to casually freestyle and warm up for the day. Allowing the music to flood his ears, movements to take over his limbs, and only his feet to remind him of where he was, Minho’s mind went blank as he began to relax and give up control of his body to the steady beats of the song.

---

By the time Minho wrapped up his practice and was  heading home the sun was already starting to settle on the lower half of the sky. Surprisingly the day had passed him by quickly. Spending the whole day grinding out a routine he had been recently working to perfect was not usually an overall fun time, but Minho found that he was able to keep his practice productive and enjoyable. 

His smile throughout the day certainly had nothing to do with his breaks to text to Jisung. The casual banter between them felt natural, and the light conversation made him feel lighter on his feet as he moved across the floor. Even with the flirty nature of their introduction, their conversation never steered far from how anyone would expect two close friends to interact. Minho found himself smiling more throughout the day as he checked Jisung’s messages throughout the morning and afternoon. 

12:25 pm

Also for the record my capacity to flirt is honestly quite unimpressive 

I hope you aren’t talking to me for my stage charisma and charm 

To sweep you off you feet, i may be a disappointment

Usually i'm just awkward, cant flirt, doesnt leave the house, Jisung

You almost tripped over your feet walking into the bar last night

Dw im not sure id want you to sweep me off my feet with that balance

You wound me ;--;

 By talking to Jisung, he had somehow managed to satisfy all of Minho’s previous curiosities while sparking new ones. Even with Minho generally avoiding giving away his own personal interests and dreams, Jisung didn't hold those same reservations and filled their conversation with “fun facts” and lively stories. Jisung’s lively play by play of the bickering taking place between his group mates, now officially introduced as Chan and Changbin, had Minho giggling on the floor of the practice room. The way Jisung described everything brought it to life in ways that he hadn’t expected from a casual text conversation. The boy was definitely a great storyteller even just over type, and Minho found himself wondering if he would get to hear his endless stories in person.

---

[Rich Boy Han Jisung]

3:36 pm

Youre one interesting man Lee Minho

Han, you know almost nothing about me

On the contrary I feel like I know a good amount

Youre name is Lee Minho

You work at the fancy restaurant Menu 98

You used to work at the bar we were at last night

You have a really beautiful smile

…

Are you quite done

Definitely not but if i start going off about how stunning your eyes are 

you might block me

Which would be a shame please dont

What happened to awkward Jisung who cant flirt huh?

Minho returned to the small apartment to find Felix attempting to cook some ramen in the microscopic kitchen and Hyunjin sprawled across the couch watching some variety show. Felix was probably fueling up in order to spend the night gaming the weekend away before his work overtook his weekdays again. Hyunjin barely looked to be conscious but still managed to wave a greeting to Minho as he walked into the room. 

“How’d practice go?” 

“Pretty well. Finally was able to clean up that middle section I’ve been messing up.” Minho hurried into the other room to shower once again before heading to the restaurant for his evening shift. 

“Oh glad to hear it.” Felix’s voice filtered in from his place by the stove that was shoved in a corner of the room, along with a fridge and a sink that barely classified it as a kitchen unit. None of the three were complaining, the stove heated up their ramen water and the fridge kept their milk cold, what more could they ask for?

“WAIT, did you talk to that guy at the bar last night???” Hyunjin’s loud voice carried from the couch through their thin walls allowing Minho to clearly hear even if his bedroom door was closed. 

“Which one, Jinnie?? You gotta be more clear than that.” Minho had actually stacked up a few numbers from his night and received atleast ten free drinks from other patrons. Not too bad for the first night out, but of course the only phone number he had bothered messaging happened to be the one he had been texting all day.

“You know the one, the rapper one you left to go see perform.” Minho of course knew, but he wasn't gonna admit it to his roommate so easily, and just hummed in response eliciting a groan from the younger. 

“If you haven’t, you so should. 3racha is all everyone from the bar is talking about. Their concert must have been a big deal or something.” 

“WHAT, 3RACHA? You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Felix, apparently a fan, shuffles in with his ramen in hand to accompany the loud outburst.

“Hyung! One of them gave you their number?? They’re literally like the next big thing in the music scene. Which one of them was it?”  

J.One, Han Jisung, the cute pink hoodie guy

“His name is Jisung I’m pretty sure.” Minho was very sure. “I didnt know they were such a big deal” 

“J.One gave you his number? Damn hyung, you don't even know. They’ve been performing locally for years but their fan base has grown a ton in the last year. There’s rumors that they've signed with a company and are going to come out with something soon.” Felix continued spouting off information on the group to them, as Minho continued his routine of preparing for work at Menu 98. 

---

[Rich Boy Han Jisung]

4:35 pm

Looks like my roommate is a fan of you guys

We’re not talking the tall beautiful bartender from last night right

No that was Hyunjin, Felix is the fan

beautiful?

Ah atleast ill be on the good side of one of ur roomies

Yeah tall boy was pretty, but something about him made me think he didnt like me

I think it was his face, and his height

Most tall pretty boys dont take too well to a squirrel boy being in their territory ya know. 

Whats not to like about a cute squirrel boy

Im sure he likes you and youre over thinking

If his two roommates like you, he’ll have to like you by association

:o 

Did Lee Minho just admit to liking me 

Wow the development, less than 24 hours 

We love to see it

Your ridiculous

I said nothing of the sort

Sure sure hyung

Gtg now, dinner shifts starting

Have fun at work!!!!

(wait can i call you hyung???)

Minho left him on read as he walked into the restaurant, already bustling with waiters and the changing of shifts for the dinner crowd. ‘Less than 24 hours’ and Minho was already admitting indirectly that he liked the boy he had only just properly met the night before. Stranger things have happened he supposed. Minho continued to surprise himself with this one though. He was not one to seek out friendships or relationships. Anything more than the very occasional one night stand, was practically void from Minho’s social life. Other than the people he had met through dance and his roommates, there were very few others that Minho had chosen to form any kind of relationship with. Even his co-workers were mostly just faces and names he had to remember in order to do his job well. 

Well, expect Seungmin.

“You look awfully happy today, who spiked your coffee this morning?” Seungmin had been a newly inserted character in Minho’s life but they became fast friends after a few too many late night shifts without proper caffeination. 

Seungmin had been a newly hired host at Menu 98, just the average polite university student with enough experience to get hired. When Minho met him they exchanged the basic pleasantries and thought that would be the end of that, until one fated closing shift. A certain, tipsy, entitled, rich, high class asshole of a customer had held up Minho’s section for much of the night. Minho found himself being bossed around and verbally berated throughout the night, trying to serve the women who appeared to never be satisfied with the food or service Minho was offering. By the end of the night, she was their last customer and Minho saw her to the front to pay. His customer service smile, strained and barely holding up, and the woman’s complaints, even while paying, had him wanting to drop all his pleasantries and curse her out as she waltzed out the door.

    “What an absolute fucking pain in the ass of a woman”

Minho hadn’t thought he had said his thoughts aloud, but looked up to catch Seungmin, who had let the words come out in hushed tones as he held a sickening polite smile on his face. After that point the two had bonded over various pain in the ass customers and a mutual love for sarcastic backhanded insults. Minho's relationship with Seungmin was probably the closest thing to a friendship that the older had experienced in a while. 

“No spiked coffee, sadly” 

“Well something’s making your usual sad bitch face smile, so it's gotta be good. Hmm...Meet someone?” Seungmin’s signature puppy eyes were on full display, but not without the signature  mischievous glint they always held. 

“Well wouldn't you like to know Seungmo~ but me and my usually flawlessly beautiful face got to go charm our way into some extra tips.” Minho gave the boy a gentle pat on his head, that was met with a stubborn pout forming at the younger’s lips.

“You definitely met someone, you usually don't have this much self-confidence so early into the evening.” Minho did nothing but giggle at his comment and made his way to the back room to begin his shift. 

------

one ~ two ~ three ~ four ~ five ~ six ~ seven ~ eight ~ nine

#stray kids fic #stray kids #skz #skz fic #minsung #lee minho #han jisung #stray kids han #lee know #jisung #idk what to tag anymore

[happys-crazy-queen22]

Family And Business

Gif credit @angels-reyes

Requested on Wattpad.

Hope you all enjoy.

Happy Reading Dollies.

Taglist: @ilovetaquitosmmmm @twistnet. @nocturnalherb16. @baylishh. @myangelreyes

"Y/N"!!! Hearing your father's anger made you tremble, you sat up in bed and got ready for the tongue lashing.

"Yes"?

"What the fuck is this"? Bishop threw the white stick on your bed beside you. You picked it up and saw it read positive. Sighing, you thought you threw it away good for him not to find it but you must have underestimated him. You never had privacy in the house at all.

"Where did you find this? It's private".

"So you're knocked up"?

Rolling your eyes at such stupidity coming from a man that had you at a young age and you're just twenty-three.

"I'm pregnant, yes".

"Who the fuck is it? I'm gonna kill him". Bishop was steaming mad, his face red and his hands balled into a fist.

"It's none of your business".

"It is my business. You are my daughter and you live in my house". You got off the bed and went to your closet grabbing your duffle bad and throwing some clothes into it. Bishops hands went to his hips.

"Where are you going"?

"I'm leaving. I'm not staying in your house anymore. He's asked me hundreds of times to move in with him but I always say no because I have to be here for you but I'm done. You can either except this without knowing who he is or you'll never see us again. It's up to you". You zipped up your bag and threw the strap over your shoulder, pushing past Bishop and heading to your car. The only thing he didn't own and driving to your boyfriends and father of your unborn child's house.

"Who does he think his is? He doesn't own you". Nestor paced the floor after you told him that you left and what your father said.

"Just forget it. It's over and done with, we're here with you and that's all that matters". You smiled taking his hand in yours pulling him to the couch.

"I'm so happy that you're moving in with me. I have the spare bedroom cleaned out for the baby and I cleaned out a whole dresser for you". He held your hand as the other laid on your stomach, rubbing his thumb.

"I couldn't really get anything, I just packed a bag and got out of there".

"I'll get your stuff for you when he's not around, I'll get someone to sit on his house so we'll get a clear and go in. You still got your key right"?

"Yeah, but he'll probably have the locks changed".

"Doesn't matter, I'll get your stuff or we'll get new". You slightly smiled and laid your head on his shoulder. You really didn't want new things, there was stuff that couldn't be replaced, pictures and drawings that you did over the years. A stuffed animal that your grandfather gave you before he had passed away. So many memories that you wanted to keep happy.

After a couple days you let Bishop cool off and headed back to the house without Nestor knowing. Hoping you could talk some sense into him and be part of your child's life and yours. You still needed him.

Luckily he didn't change the locks and you snuck in. He wasn't there so this was your chance to get what was important and get out.

The first thing you grabbed was your stuffed animal, then your pictures and drawings. Last your clothes. Nestor had gotten boxes for you so you loaded everything in them and started to takt them out. You were half way done when you saw Nestors SUV pull in.

"Hey, you shouldn't be here. It'll cause to much trouble if he does come home". You told him as you stood in the drive way.

"You don't need to be lifting these heavy boxes, so let me help". Nestor walked into the house and you took a long deep breath.

Nestor was good use he lifted the box that had all your books and CDs in it and loaded in his car.

The room was unrecognizable with your stuff gone. It looked as if you never excised and that made you sad cause that was your childhood home and the last place you saw your mom so it was heart breaking leaving but you wiped your tears and went on with your packing until you heard the revs of your father's bike coming down the road. That was a good warning when you were younger, it meant you had five minutes to get the boy you were kissing out before he got his ass kicked by your father.

"Nestor"? You ran out of the house stopping at the front door. Bishop and Nestor both had their guns pulled and pointed at each other.

"Y/N, get back in the house". Bishop yelled at you but instead you walked between them now both guns pointed at you.

"Dad, please lower your gun. Nestor you too".

"You know him? Oh god, he's the father. How"? Your father lowered his gun and Nestor did the same.

"We met at a party that I went to with a friend. We have been dating for a year or so". You looked down at your feet, not daring to look at the hurt, rage and sadness on your father's face.

"And you just had to get knocked up by him"?

"This is why I didn't tell you cause I knew you would act this way. You can never let anyone else be happy, everyone has to be as miserable as you. It's not my fault that she left me here, leaving you with the responsibility of raising me. I'm sorry that I ruined your life. But now you're free and can do whatever you want. I have someone that loves me and that will take care of me and our baby". Tears started to creep up in the corner of your eyes, your face red and the little vein in your neck started to poke out and your anger rised.

"You didn't ruin my life. You made it better, I just don't want this life for you. You deserve so much better than any of us. That's why when I found out that you were pregnant I got mad all my hopes and dreams for you disappeared. All I can see now is you getting left all alone at home while Nestor is off doing God knows what because he's one of those guys. I know, cause he's like me. Do you know why I kept the boys away from you? Cause I knew you would fall for one of them and get stuck in this life".

"Ew, they're like my brothers. Thats why I didn't fall for their tricks. I'm not dumb I know what I was getting myself into when I started dating Nestor. I know what he does and I know that you two are not the most sociable people when together but I hope and pray that it'll change for me and the babys sake. Cause I need both of you in my life". You sniffled.

Bishop looked at Nestor while Nestor looked at you and then to him giving a nod. Bishop nodded and wrapped his arms around you hugging you tightly.

"I'm gonna be here for you and my grandchild. I'm not thrilled that it's Nestors but that's my own problem and I have to work on that".

"Thank you dad".

"I promise to protect them with my life. Nothing will happen to them".

"I'll believe it when I see it cause I've been in this business longer than you and I know how families are affected by our decisions when it comes to business".

"I understand. I'm going to make you trust me and prove myself to you. You don't have to worry". Nestor placed his hand on Bishop's shoulder, Bishop gave Nestor a nasty look.

"You may be with my daughter but that doesnt give you the right to touch me, now remove your hand before you lose it". Bishop warned then a grin formed on his face with a chuckle. Nestor was sweating bullets. A small laugh came from you as you let go of your dad and wrapped your arms around Nestors waist giving him love.

Nestors and Bishops relationship went from enemies to father and son n law/ enemies. You and Nestor married a few months after you moved out, Bishop knew now that this was real and going to be forever so he had to be nice if he wanted the two of you in his life, he tolerated Nestor. But family was family and business was business, they never mixed until now.

#nestor oceteva mayans #nestor oceteva x reader #nestor x reader #nestor oceteva imagine #nestor oceteva #nestor oceteva fanfiction #bishop losa #bishop losa x daughter #mayans mc imagine #mayans imagine #mayans one shot #mayans fandom #mayans fanfiction #happys crazy queen22