#do not reblog this post

[ithring]

Headcanon: Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Murtagh is a man that has survived. It is not just a statement, he has survived more than most people will ever survive in their lifetime.

It is important to note that he has survived being a slave to someone and having no free will what so ever. Within Inheritance he breaks that cycle that was to Galbatorix, by being selfless and caring for another person. While that was growth it was a not completed cycle when it came to terms of growth. Spoilers under the cut for Murtagh, vague but still there.

In Murtagh, his will is tested yet again by Bachel. Bachel attempted to break him all over again, and attempted to get him to swear fealty to her the same way the king had but much, much worse. He would have been a corpse of himself and there would have been nothing left of who he was. She wanted to use him for her purposes. He did not give in despite the amount of torture that the witch made him suffer through. He was subjected to dreaming dreams that were nightmares and events that happened to him throughout his life that impacted him. They were memories that quite literally broke him open and he didn't talk to anyone about that were brought to surface. His mother calling him a beautiful boy, his father calling him a brat because he made noise playing as child before Murtagh accidently set fire to a wooden horse that ended with Morzan slicing open his back with Zar'roc. Bachel used these dreams and memories in an attempt to break him. It was an attempt to make him suffer, to make him be broken open and to lose faith in everything. The memories go deeper than just his father cutting him open with his blade. They are ones of Thorn suffering when he was a hatchling, and how he was brought up. There are memories of Tornac's death, the day that Murtagh escaped. There are memories of Murtagh's first kill, and how he had to do it to survive. These memories also highlight the amount of misery that Murtagh went through throughout his life. It is important to note that, Murtagh has learned to accept what has been done to him. He has learned to accept these events because they are apart of him. He has learned to accept he could not change his fate, that these things happened for a reason. Even though he hates what happened, Thorn chose him. Thorn has told him, he wouldn't have chosen another person. The dragon chose to hatch for him because they were meant for one another. This being said, Murtagh has survived over and over and over again, and went from a man in misery, to a man that gained his freedom because of his will to do things for himself. He does things now because it is his choice. He does not want anyone else controlling his choices or Thorns, and he will not allow that to happen anymore. This being said Murtagh I believe also shows the signs of complex post traumatic stress disorder. There is evidence from the memories within Murtagh of CPTSD, along with his behaviors with the book. However I will say this, he has learned to begin to cope with it on his own, and considering the day and age of the series, medical treatments we have is not avaliable to fix him like we would. Thorn is a huge reason that he has been able to manage things after everything has taken place. Even if he is a dragon, Thorn is his support system and someone that he can depend on no matter what. I will also say that the blood brother he made with an urgal is also a huge factory of him admitting he needs the help from people. Murtagh admitted he needed help in this one because he was drowning bad in this. He will always have this disorder, no matter how well he manages it. It is apart of him and it is not something that is diagnosed in his time but is a present thing and is apart of him.

#( headcanons. ) #tw murtagh spoliers #do not reblog this post #anyway i have a lot of thoughts here after reading the book and this is one of them #this is a huge thing here and i rambled

[blachernaepalace]

i swear to god the epilogues/homestuck 2 crowd and their friends are some of the most self-righteous people to exist on the whole planet LMFAO

#do not reblog this post #if you reblog it i will block you

[thelampisaflashlight]

...

Ya know how sometimes you go through a rough patch and you think to yourself, "That's okay, I have -insert thing- and that helps me cope."

Well, I'm going through a rough patch.

Sunday was Mother's Day, which in and of itself doesn't seem like that big of a deal, but you gotta keep in mind the anniversary of my mother's death is less than two weeks after that, and the thing that was helping me handle going to work/brightening my days knowing I'll be working that day... was Manager Cat.

So it's like a triple whammy.

And while, like, I'm okay as I can be expected to be right now... it's a lot.

It's a lot and I'm not going to pretend like I'm fine just to keep up appearances, at least not here or with my friends.

Still though, what are the odds?

#Lamp rambles #Can a duck be a cashier #tw animal death #tw pet death #venting #do not reblog this post

[dcrlingmuses]

So I rewatched Arrietty with my friend on discord yesterday and

WELL....I'm adding so many other muses for the new year. Why not her too?

#potential muses #// LISTEN #// THE MOVIE WAS MUCH BETTER THIS SECOND TIME THAN THE FIRST TIME THROUGH #// I REALLY WANNA ADD THIS LITTLE BEAN AT SOME POINT #// MAYBE even Sho but like I really need to rewatch it a couple more times for him #// but YES I will be calling him Sho and not SHAWN #// I still have no idea why Disney did that tbh #// like HUH #// but yah I'm gonna keep Bridget as my Arrietty's VC tbh #DO NOT REBLOG THIS POST #PERSONALS DO NOT INTERACT

[percentstardust]

after the whole disaster that was the aftermath of losing his eye, aemond was walked back to his rooms by criston and alicent. helaena and aegon followed behind them out of concern for their brother but they were sent to their own rooms. criston had to eventually pick aemond up cause he looked like he finally was about to pass out and he couldn’t stand the pain any longer. they had to make a detour despite the fact aemond was on the verge of passing out to take him to vhagar for she could not be calmed down. everyone was afraid she would rip the castle apart so her new rider was presented to him in criston's arms with his mother by his side. he is barely awake but able to speak a little with vhagar to calm her down. he is taken to his room. alicent sent for a maester to bring milk of the poppy for him. he was given it and to make sure her son made it through the night, alicent stayed by his side ALL night. when they sailed home, he was given more milk of the poppy to ease his pain and he slept all of the way home. alicent would check in on him on and off, as to let him have privacy to deal with this if he woke up on the way home.

once home, he was administered it again because they needed to open his stitches and remove his dead eye. mind you, he is not given as much as a grown adult would be due to the fact he’s a child and there’s a high chance he could become addicted faster to it, so he felt this happening even if it was dulled down. he had to be held down for the maester to do this entire procedure because he eventually started getting violent. after it was done, he was given dreamwine to help him sleep. he caught an infection, which left him in bed for days. he was able to fight it off out either pure luck or the maesters medical methods. either way, he almost died because of this infection. he was taken out to vhagar several times to show her he was alive and not dead. she spent the entire time WORRIED ABOUT HIM. she would be seen flying over kingslanding CONSTANTLY. he was in constant pain and he would eventually have to take milk of the poppy or dreamwine to help. he would have to have his empty eye socket cleaned out on the regular, eventually learning how to do it himself so he wouldn’t have to rely on a maester. he would only allow alicent to help him, sometimes letting helaena or aegon help if he wasn’t in too much pain.

he had to learn how to function with one eye, which was frustrating as hell at first. it was harder to read, his reaction times were off when training, he ran into things a lot and over all had a hard time doing basic tasks that were not hard for him before. add this on top of him having chronic pain he has to deal with along with phantom eye syndrome, nerve damage, and his self esteem seemingly becoming worse than before, aemond was in hell. he overcame it, it just took a lot of work.

#& head canons ( aemond targaryen ) #& head canons ( all ) #chronic pain cw #addiction cw #have to post one about his chronic pain and phantom eye pain now #my boy is stronger than us marines #he adapted became more confident AND HE CHANGED HIMSELF #he became a better dragon rider better scholar better scholar and he didn’t let people walk over him #then he learned four more languages and too many skills he probably doesn’t need #he really said i am going to become better than those i hate #🤭 #IF YOU ARE NOT ME THE MOD AND OWNER OF THIS BLOG AND ORIGINAL POSTER #DO NOT REBLOG THIS POST

[fleetinglotus]

Teaser Analysis

Do note that everything is subjective, everything is what i really see from Wanderer’s teaser video. This is my personal opinion on things, do not reblog this post, you’ve been warn.

The Gnosis

He was created, moreso meant to house the Electro Gnosis, something that never truly escaped his mind, even after feeling discarded and having both his initial purpose, existence reduced to little. It all but explain the grown obsession in wanting it for himself, to rightfully house what was meant to be his ‘heart’. And yet, not once, but twice, it was taken away. 

Though shattered by this loss, after going to so much trouble for the Gnosis, there comes a time, within his journey as the wanderer, to eventually learn to let go and become the ‘heart’ himself. 

The plush figurine purpose

Foreshadowing, put in simply, it is a foreshadow sign. Unlike what is first seen from connecting with Haypasia’s consciousness, regarding his past, the little doll seems to simply be there but upon closer look, it holds a purpose indeed. Even if said purpose can be considered pointless, there is a tear shape near one of its eyes.

What i am saying is, it ties with the fact that he shed tears, expressed feelings ‘pon creation and did so in his Teaser, the exact same eye as the one to be found onto the small doll left behind by whomst had his childhood, his future taken away.

The child’s last words

‘‘What if, if hearts can be born from ashes’’, to me, i do not feel like its meant as a suggestion, a question. To me alone, for Wanderer alone, this implies forwards to a journey of self discovery, it doesn’t suits me to view this as redemption. To me, it is him, at present time, moving towards the future while also settling it once and all, with the past. 

Yes, in one way, due to where it is to be found, the Anemo Vision could be what had been once lost but i see more to this as well. The Vision is more meant to soothe such a loss, to guide Scaramouche forwards but to also confront past memories. If one would remember, Venti did mention how he can use the wind in the form of old memories and carry them, given this is how Razor was able to see the very family he once had, to know his parents were from the Adventurers Guild.

Him, finding a permanent heart, is not him taking a better turn. He has all rights to remain a brat while finally seeking back his original purpose in the ways he wants to, where he doesn’t feel like owing it to the world nor to the gods. Wheter alone or nay, he shall rise anew, become his own person after feeling unwanted for so long, feeling bitter & alone all this time. 

Symbolism behind the fire

The spiritual symbolism behind Fire, holds many meanings in different cultures. The most common is rebirth/resurrection, the history behind a Pheonix says it all. If the pheonix must burn to re-emerge once again, so too should he burn bright and free from everything that held him back for so long. Fire is generally a force of destruction, but with its destructive behavior comes a more mellow approach if learnt to be used safely.

Though a symbol of strenght and desire, the concept of purification is to be noted. In which case, like the Lotus Symbolism, i believe Wanderer will push forwards no matter what should lie ahead.

Also a ball of fire is what is seen being ripped from his body, a life force of sorts, a way for him to disconnect with his past self, or so i am to believe. 

Fire, in the end, is another form of Eternity, atleast on what i researched does it mentions that.

Ballerina’s reference

You can disagree for all you want because, again, this is all subjective from me but the ballerina is Lumine. 

Lumine is from the stars beyond, stars are typically known as guides amidst the darkest nights. Wanderer is the toy soldier, Lumine is the ballerina, a light to pull him from the shadows, wheter he likes it or not. Though he is bound to not admit it easily, he can finally turn to someone other than Nahida. Should he want to turn to others, its all on him, really.

Moreover, the child says how the toy soldier still had his eyes set on the other figurine. To me, it hints at how, since first encountering the Traveler, he actually kept tabs on the twins, but then again to say Lumine would make more sense but thats just my personal opinion.

Confrontation with the past

By the end of the Teaser, we eventually see him taking a step forwards and confronting what is left of the past, his past that continues to be a thorn on his side now. Albeit that freeing himself from the old times does not wipe clean what he has done all these years and that he does not have to seek apologies. 

To say sorry and claim to turning over a new leaf, far from suits a character like Scaramouche. He has no actual reason to apologize, any reasons to completely, utterly change himself. 

After all, its not like anyone is bound to ignore the many atrocities he commited. I think rather than being asked to apologize amount to nothing, would hardly mean anything to him. There is no benefit to be add from admitting his wrongdoings, for he does not have to owe anyone, what has the world owed him after all?.

What i am really saying is, this is a journey to self discovery, to unlatch finally from the past, to actually find a ‘heart’. I’m putting it down again, Redemption doesn’t sit with me right, every time i hear it, it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Rebirth is not Redemption.

#ooc #boy oh boy #did i go wild writing this up #tw: death mention #everything is subjective #i have never done a teaser analysis sssshhhh #lore #genshin spoilers #do not reblog this post

[ahotknife]

damn getting old sucks i just can’t have an eating disorder in my 20s like i did in high school... it’s just not the same... it’s starting to actually feel like there are health consequences... 

#do NOT reblog this post #my heart do be feeling weird and my head do always hurt tho thats for sure! wasnt like that when i was 15!! take me back #lucinda.txt

[neversith]

since anakin is half force, there are perks regarding it along with drawbacks.

a perk and a drawback that is the biggest part of his heritage is his connection to the force. his connection makes him more attuned to the force and more powerful. this is also a drawback because when something major happens like order 66, he is screwed. yes, he will recover but it takes time. he is able to use the force at ease. getting past his mind shields take a jedi as powerful as mace, yoda, or obi wan. and even then, it takes Forever to happen. it is much easier for him to break through another's shields. he can drive someone crazy if he is in their mind for too long. force healing comes naturally to him. communing with the force / meditation takes more concentration than it should but that's because he has adhd.

there is his affinity for tip toeing between the light and dark, making him essentially what would be considered a "grey" jedi. he is more light side oriented ( pre rots ) but he eventually learns to balance both sides on his own ( post rots ). he picks up dark side powers that he uses only on rare occasions. yes, these powers include force lightning and force screaming. anakin eventually becomes powerful enough to pull cruisers out of the sky without much effort.

let's move on to his pain tolerance, immune system, metabolism, and how fast he heals on his own without the use of force healing. his pain tolerance is high, he can suffer through being shot multiple times in non fatal areas without feeling as much pain. his wounds and broken bones heal faster, taking half as amount of time to heal. while he can get sick, it has to be a major illness. his immune system is too strong to catch a silly cold. he metabolizes food quickly and he needs to constantly be eating. he feels hungry all of the time, like a never ending pit of food especially after expending a lot of energy in the force.

further more, he eventually gains access to the world between worlds without having to die. the force manifests to him in a physical form sometime during his rebels era arc and they start training him to be able to do so. the force gives him access to their realm where they reside. they also teach him how to become a force ghost once he passes on. once he does die, he will become like the father on mortis where he watches over the world between worlds. he can change his appearance to look the age that he died to whatever age he wants to look. he is the chosen one. he is a child of the force. anakin is essentially a demigod. his is too powerful for his own good, but, unlike canon, his power is kept in check and he does not fall to the dark side.

#& this is anakin skywalker ( head canons ) #DO NOT REBLOG THIS POST #do not know if any of this makes sense but yeah #figured they would be perks and downsides #you know cause he is a force demigod

[ladysophiebeckett]

lmao????

#I would love to switch places with this person #i am flabbergasted #do not reblog this post #I am not trying to trash this person I am just in shock

[metfell]

ok holy shit i have to at least get my art stuff done today. its not that much but i am very scared to open the school website so im setting a goal for myself publicly on my main that if i get my 2 art assignments turned in before dinner time then i will ask to go out to eat tonight as a reward

#text #DO NOT REBLOG THIS POST

[aropride]

every couple years i remember some shit my brother did and how fucked up it was and it ruins my life for a couple months and then i forget again

#‘maybe im being a dick i mean he wasny that bad’ *remembers him ****** ** **** ** *** ******* ** *** **** *** ****** ** ** ***** ok maybe- #-he was that bad actually. hell. #do not reblog this post #text

[synthetic-ultramarine]

alright now that i’ve seen people talk about the matter without getting instabanned for a couple days:

a) I’m kind of baffled that tumblr staff can not only openly have casual fandom-focused user accounts on the site but actively link to those accounts in official staff-to-user communication. The idea of not establishing a very clear barrier between your personal social media accounts and your professional life is just unthinkable to me.

b) over the years i’ve seen people actively threaten the staff account over moving the buttons around and not get wiped off the face of the earth like that.

c) the first time i came out as a lesbian on here, which was the first time i came out as a lesbian anywhere, I immediately got sexually harassed and staff told me there was nothing they could do about it.

d) i’ve seen the original post that kicked the whole thing off be referred to as “ a callout post” but it wasn’t really, imo it was more like a casual observation post, it was a “huh, that’s weird” post.

e) staff somehow miraculously managed to build up a significant amount of good will in the past few months and they just threw it all in the trash because one of them linked their own blog, resulting in people seeing the content of said blog. like did they really not know how people feel about that book series or that anime? 

f) and to top it all off all that “humans” blog does is post “top 10 epic funny tumblr posts” listicles.

#Do not reblog this post #tbd maybe

[jplupine]

So apparently some people new to Tumblr think a repost and a reblog are the same thing, so when they see creators asking for people to not repost, they're thinking the creators are saying to not reblog 😭

Y'all, a repost is when you copy/download the work and create a new post using the work making it seem as if it's yours. A reblog is you using a site provided feature to share the creator's post directly from the creator so that it's still credited to them and they still get all of the traction/notes from the work.

Please, reblog fics/art/etc. that you enjoy! Reblogging is not reposting! Creatives need support too, and reblogging is a way to do that!

#When Wolf Speaks #text post #orange #minors dni #unless the creator specifically states 'do not REBLOG' then they're not saying don't reblog when they say don't repost

[gerrykeay]

did you know there's a day-by-day timeline of the plot in the dungeon meshi adventurer's bible and TODAY is when it all kicks off

happy falin gets eaten and the gang starts eatin' day :)

#i'll put the full timeline in a reblog for other Nerds #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #admittedly its early but i hadnt seen anyone post about it and someone Needed to #this thing is so thorough you could put together a reread order for a dunmeshi daily. but i didnt do that #or get a 'on this day in dungeon meshi' blog all queued up. i didnt do that either

[fleetinglotus]

                      Rules / About / Promo

                        Blog Timeline & Changes. (Please Read)

Additional muse: Hinamori (Akasha AU), Tulaytullah's Remembrance Perso.

#pinned post #do not reblog this post #ooc #blog directory

[blinkpen]

what if i decided i'm straight up not posting any new art publicly until that family's GFM in my pinned is at least Halfway to its goal

(even half my followers donating 5 bucks each would do that btw)

#i dont know them i just want to focus efforts and secure at least one 'at least this fam conclusively got help' i want to do SOMETHING OK?? #extrwemely time senstiive GFMs that linger in limbo eternally are heartbreaking #i might post writing and reblog pre-posted things so the blogs not dead but mmmmmm