#die for this... we already bEEN THRU THIS TWICE BEFORE IN THE MOVIE. anyway ok fine i cant escape i prefer the original ending . | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lanamemories2 · 4 years

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clip clops in on horseback wearing a pointy little dunces hat n sipping frm a rly long crazy straw tht says ‘goblin’ w all of the swirls. Hlo. i’m nai n it’s rly nice to meet u all!!! 23 n she/ha pronouns. i’m one of the three admins here (cleo lazuli on the main) n i’m literally So Excited to get started i cld honestly beat my chest like caesar the ape over it. more abt lana under the cut!!! also like this or hmu if u wna plot n her pinterest is here 👺🌚

『KRISTINE FROSETH ❙ CIS-FEMALE』 ⟿ looks like LANA JAMESON is here for HER JUNIOR year as a DANCE student. SHE is 21 years old & known to be VIVACIOUS, ALLURING, CHILDISH & IMPULSIVE. They’re living in NOLAND, so if you’re there, watch out for them. ⬳ NAI. 23. GMT. SHE/HER.

AESTHETICS:

scalding your fingers in shower water until they glow like rudolph’s nose, cherry red gym socks tugged high and nothing else, stepping out into a cold breeze in just spaghetti strapped silk, a red lightening stripe painted over your eye like a new take on the scarlet letter, crowning each finger with a miniature raspberry, hugging a knee close to lick a stripe of fruit juice off the bruised cap, doodling penises in condensation instead of sitting still, a water pistol topped with rum and covered in glittery pin-up stickers, believable smiles that feel more like baring teeth, playing where’s waldo with your lipstick in the crowd of a party and finding red on at least six people’s mouths, a bumper sticker on the back of a convertible cadillac that says ‘SCRAPPY DOO IS A FILTHY SLUT’, prancing around in your underwear to a vinyl record with the curtains open.

HISTORY:

lana grew up in a big house in albany, NY. i picture it w dark oak floors n lots of light furniture. albums framed on walls. mayb some rolling stone covers too frm way bk when of the bands her dad’s label signed. kind of like… a rock star palace w no evidence of children at all. i think i described it best in one of lana’s self paras once when i said the garden ws “as big as it was unloved”

lana’s mum victoria (vic) ws a music journalist w a pretty fruitful career ahead of her when she met lana’s dad richard (rich). his record label ws jst starting out, founded on the coattails of his rich best friend’s (jensen peters) investment w his other best friend (who he jst calls knoxville). it rocketed to success when they signed poppy injects, a rock band w an electric stage presence, n victoria ws drawn to the glitz n glamour of a man tht ws at the helm of his aspiring industry. their love ws very impulsive, all or nothing right frm the start, n it ws almost like she ws mre in love w his accomplishments n what he represented than him. jst a leetle bit Fractured in its intentions.

anyway so jameson records repped a few big rock bands bk in the eighties, altho poppy injects r who they’re mostly known fr, namely bc of hw brightly they crashed n burned. they were a big chart success bt the lead singer hd quite an intense struggle w heroin (wsnt rly subtle abt it either while he ws in the public eye as u cn probably imagine frm such an on-the-nose band name) n he ws always in n out of the papers. it eventually brought down his career n it ws a big publicity nightmare

lana pretty much… grew up around figures like this throughout childhood. rly troubled characters who wld kind of… b extremely volatile n destructive abt their troubles. the jameson house was kind of an open one as welcoming clients went n a lot of parties took place there. a lot of the time musicians wld b snorting lines in the kitchen when she wnted to grab a bowl of cereal fr breakfast n it was just. a very strange environment fr a child to grow up in

her parents always kind of jst… didn’t like her much. her older brother caleb ws unplanned bt they sort of welcomed the surprise more bt… quickly realised they weren’t cut out fr parenthood n then when lana came as another surprise 3 yrs later they didn’t even try to hide their resentment abt the situation. her mum ws actually booked in to have an abortion bt cldnt go through with it at the last minute. once when lana asked her why shes so cold towards her she jst turned her head frm her dresser, looked at her, told her abt this n said “idk why i didn’t go”. lana didn’t kno wht to say to tht so she jst left her room n closed the door

(dissociation tw) bc of this growing up lana adopted this weird like…. she didn’t rly kno what it ws bt it ws a delusion of sorts where she thought she ws a ghost. she’d jst sort of… drift around the halls w noone acknowledging her n sometimes she ws jst convinced she wsnt actually there or they cldnt see her n she ws jst haunting the house frm a previous family

the one saving grace tho tht sort of?? gt her thru this n made her feel Seen ws caleb. lana quite genuinely hs always thought the sun shines out of her older brothers ass like she jst thinks. hes the best person in the entire world. wld b rly bewildered if anyone questioned tht. he wld always look out for her in the zoo they called a home n cut the crusts off her sandwiches (he’d cook fr them most of the time bc their parents were too busy/didn’t care to) n sometimes wld even sleep at the bottom of her bed curled up like a guard dog. it ws always lana n caleb n his best friend tommy against the world in tht house (tommy lived next door n was always over bc he had very strict parents including a military father tht he found suffocating)

SO when caleb n tommy announced tht they’d signed up to the army lana ws understandably…….. completely blindsided. she ws rly upset tht they were leaving bt she tried not to b mad at them n made them promise theyd b safe n back as soon as possible. she even asked if they cld somehow take her w them n they were jst like :/ it doesn’t work that way luv x

(death tw, ptsd tw, grief tw, trauma tw, hospitalisation tw, drugs tw) anyway caleb ended up getting discharged under grounds of severe ptsd when he witnessed tommy die in an explosion tht took place in a shock raid. caleb returned home sans tommy bt he was never the same after tht. he’s been in and out of hospital twice nw n he’s currently dipped off the radar after starting to use. lana kind of felt like two of her brothers died out there in a way n jst like tht it wasn’t them vs the world any mre, it was jst her. she doesn’t talk abt this tho. when she feels the urge to cry she usually jst smiles

ANYWAY whew tht rly…. took a dark turn there….. chuckles nervously at hw sad lana’s life is bt it’s fine it’s all fINE!!!!!!! ok. so on a mre lighthearted note the jameson family r pretty well off n bc of her relation to such a big music industry figure she’s hung out w a fair few relatively high rep ppl thru her teens. mostly kids of celebrities n stuff like tht. she amassed kind of an instagram following mainly fr her style (v penny lane-esque in some aspects aka lots of fur cuff trimmed jackets bt then also jst…. a wild combination of everything honestly. pastel faux fur coats, seventies style platforms, flame red cowboy boots, pink fishnet tights n glitter used like highlight Everywhere) n bc she’s undeniably Very Pretty

(trauma tw) after caleb got back he was rly withdrawn n depressed. he shut lana out n was kind of harsh to her a lot of the time, always telling her to leave him alone or pushing her away. it didnt help either tht lana had a rly traumatic experience w some of her dad’s colleagues at the label when she ws 16 n he was away n she cldnt even tell him abt it once he was bk bc of his own traumas. she kind of jst shut it all in n kept it to herself

(hypersexuality tw) this obviously?? made her spiral a lot. she was already a girl tht loved sex (she’d only rly done foreplay before tho) but since her trauma it got…. completely out of hand. it got to a point where she couldnt rly go 2 days without it, probably not even 1. her lowest point has probably been scrolling thru craiglist for anonymous encounters n meeting up w strangers on there fr a quick fuck jst for the thrill even tho it’s insanely dangerous n she cld wind up getting herself killed. it’s v clear at this point tht she has a sex addiction whether she’s ever admitted it or not. it kind of… almost mingled w tht same feeling she used to get when she ws younger of being a ghost?? like she jst. only rly feels Real when she’s being touched

(violence tw) a mre recent point of history is her involvement w danny nielsen (an evil npc of mine who is possibly the antichrist??? pending investigation). he attended radcliffe n lived in a house w a group of guys near campus. it wsn’t a registered frat bt he essentially…ran it like one it ws kind of a weird set-up where he ws the King Of The Roost. essentially he found out tht lana n a guy called zeke slept together n he ended up beating him to near death in front of her bc his pride ws rly bruised since they were meant to be dating (if u can call it tht bc danny’s idea of dating is very Warped). ANYWAY he ws found guilty n sent to jail so it ws like Intense n a gd example of the kinds of disastrous relationships she gets herself into. perks of being a wallflower voice: We Accept The Love We Think We Deserve.

PERSONALITY:

always smells vaguely of wild cherries or strawberry starburst or jst the candy aisle in general. if she ws a vinyl record she’d b this one n she’d only play good vibrations by the beach boys, dancing on my own by robyn, play that funky music by wild cherry, femme fatale by the velvet underground n (i can’t get no) satisfaction by the rolling stones

growing up lana was always a huge social butterfly. knew everyone n everyone knew her. she ws one of those girls tht ws kind of impossible to ignore or forget. very animated, always made u feel like u were the centre of the universe whenever she spoke to u, always made it feel like u were best friends even if ud only spoken to her once.

deliberately puts on tht kind of Magnetic Alluring Act tht femme fatales wear in movies w most ppl. kind of…. is always playing A Role of the person tht she wants to b seen as. chameleons to situations. feels like she’s performed as the vivacious n fun loving Lana Jameson fr so long tht she doesn’t rly kno who she is beneath tht bt she isn’t too keen to find out

she’s always been rly spontaneous n adventurous. always doing something weird n wild every weekend. she has ten thousand ridiculously absurd n chaotic stories

uncontrollably flirty. boundlessly confident. cld make a joke out a paper bag n her comedy is sometimes surreal / absurd. she tends to laugh when she feels like crying n has a smile brighter than a ray of texas sunshine.

always dapples her fingers thru the breeze when she’s driving in a car w the window down. she almost always has some sort of sweet on her, whether it’s sour haribo cherries or strawberry lollipops.

she adores david bowie n prince n madonna n anyone tht’s a vintage style icon w little care fr what ppl think.

daisies n poppies r her fav flowers bc daisies r wild n overlooked n poppies r the first thing u look at in a green field. she’s had like 8472493874 ‘relationships’ n none of them hav lasted beyond a month / hav been terrible / hav seen her being treated badly / she’s cheated on them. i dnt think she’s actually ever been w anyone she hasn’t cheated on in some form or another

PLOTS:

exes tht lana’s fucked over hideously. she’d probably cheat a lot and it’d be a whole…mess.

mayb someone tht flipped the switch and cheated on her?

a cousin plot cld b fun too. a friend tht lana fel out w bc she slept w their significant other.

a fake dating plot cld b fun honestly

someone tht’s getting lana into drugs?? she’s kind of impressionable/down for anything so tht’s a likely scenario she’d get into tbh

an unrequited crush!! (either way is cool)

someone tht is just hanging out w her/using her bc she has a lot of instagram followers or they want to b signed to her dad’s label

someone in a band!! she’d probably make like penny lane n b their groupie/sleep w them all fgjkshgkh

umm a good influence too mayb?

oh and a past summer romance/fling tht cld either have meant a lot or not have meant anything at all. bonus points if both of them hav a diff viewpoint on it.

honestly?? anything is fine i cld ramble for days. mayb even one of the high profile kids she grew up hangin w idk. world’s our oyster fellas!

#radintro #hypersexuality tw #trauma tw #hospitalisation tw #violence tw #death tw #grief tw #ptsd tw #dissociation tw #drugs tw #ok this is literally insatiably beefy bt. feel free to jst skip right to personality n plots #anyway shrieks in glee n hits post

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deadmantalking117 · 7 years

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MEL

In my mid 30's I really started getting sick. All the time. So very sick. Up until now I was mostly ok. For the past 10 years since my diagnosis I was doing fine. But I had that Sword of Damocles hanging over my head. I had been told that I would die before I got to be 40. And there's 40.. right over there! And for the first time.. I'm really sick.. a lot. Deaths coming for me. So I did what you're supposed to do. When I got sick.. I had my Dr admit me into the hospital... that's where you go to die.. right? Some episodes were a few days.. some a few weeks. But they were many. Being fed thru a tube. IV tubes everywhere.. so many needles.. Part if my routine was walking the halls. To help recover.. it's very important to keep moving. The more you can force yourself to get up and move.. the faster you recover. It's pure Newtonian physics.. a body at rest stays at rest.. a body in motion stays in motion.. so get moving. Keep moving. Walking the halls is an ordeal. You need to bundle up all your tubes and IV's.. unplug the pumps. (They're battery backed up) and make sure you dont get tangled up and fall. But I put on my monster feet slippers and headed on out. Usually twice per day.. I would try to get 10 laps around the ward. Most times I barely noticed other people.. I'm in astonishing amounts of pain.. and focused on making the next lap. But I could see other rooms.. with other people. As I passed by one of these.. a little shell of a girl.. laying on her bed was being smacked on the back by nurses.. they had to do this several times a day to break up the phlegm in her lungs.. so she wouldn't drown. I had noticed her before.. another frequent flyer like me. This time she gave me a little smile and a weak wave. She's seen my laps.. and had started counting me. One day as I'm passing.. she called out.. "that's 6!" I stuck my head in to say a quick hello. And my entire life changed. Mel was a little waif of a girl. She was fighting a couple horrible diseases that were wasting her tiny little body.. she was terminal.. but hanging on hard.. at 19 years old.. she looked 10.. she was so frail she couldn't get out of bed... ever. I was 36-37 and facing my own mortality. But this girl never had any real life. At 19 .. She's never had a boyfriend.. or any friend.. She's been in hospital beds her entire life. Nurses were her only human contact, besides her parents. But they had to work to support their dying daughter.. so they couldn't be there a lot. I made it my mission to visit her as often as I could get out my own bed. Most days.. as I did my laps. I'd stick my head in the door.. say hi.. ask how she was doing.. always a weak little smile.. "still here" she'd joke. Thats 4! Or 5! As I hobbled past. One day when I stopped by she asked me if I wanted to come over tonight and watch a movie with her.. as a permanent guest.. she got a good t.v. and a vcr.. her mom would bring her movies. "So if you are bored and wanna come by my mom will bring me any movie I want". I have an amazing wife and family. My times in the hospital were made easier by their visits and support. I was never lonely. But this sweet dying wisp of a girl.. only had mom and dad.. and they were killing themselves working to keep her alive as long as they could. So. Movie night! I bundled up my tubes.. put on my monster feet slippers.. and headed over around 8. See.. the thing in hospitals is.. time is meaningless. 2 am.. just the same as 5pm. But mom left at 8 each night.. so she's free! Our first movie was a Ray Liotta comedy/drama called Article 99. If you wanna see a story about veterans care.. its great. A must watch. We gabbed throughout the film. Each making jokes about the movie.. or our actual lives. Or whatever.. I was stunned by how cheerful and funny she was. How could someone this ravaged be so upbeat? I remember when I left that first night.. I had this overpowering urge to give her a hug or something.. but that's impossible. She can't be touched ! The nurses had told me was written in stone.. she was so prone to infection that you had be sterilized before any contact. They had to undergo a whole routine just to treat her! The only reason I could sit with her was because we were already in the same environment.. and I didn't have anything contagious. I recall the time where I was in for a flare up. But I was also having sinus issues.. so her room was a no fly zone. When I could get up and walk.. I had to stand well back from her door and kinda yell in to her room. But she'd always have something to tell me. On days when I was too sick to get up from my bed.. we'd pass messages back and forth through the nurses.."she wants to know when you're coming by for movie night.. and what do want her mom to bring?" Tell her.." maybe tomorrow night.. ever seen Star Wars?" Things like that. Most days.. I was way too sick to get up. But I made a special effort to at least do a couple laps.. so I could say hi. She'd always update me with her "labs" her blood count.. oxygen levels.. what new drug they were going with now.. there was always a new drug. Basically let me know she still alive. I'd tell her about the family.. "Kat says hi.. she'll see you on her next visit" "kids are doing ok" things like that. This was over a time period of about 6 or 8 months..I was literally sick all the time. Most days.. I'd get up.. vomit uncontrollably for a while.. have an astonishingly painful bowel movement or 6. Try to get on with my day. Over and over I'd go back to the hospital.. 3 or 4 days usually.. couple weeks sometimes... one particular stretch of 35 days being fed thru a tube stands out. I was not a happy camper. But here was this dying girl.. who almost never got to go home. And she's better than me. It bothered her that she was happy I was sick... but it was cool that we could hang out. I remember when she confessed this.. she had a small whisper of a voice.. because of the years of damage from tubes and drains. She talked kinda like a deaf person talks. But very quietly.. a husky whisper. I can hear her even to this day.. 25 years later. Picture her laying in her bed.. She looked a bit like the actress Kate Micucci. Just a smaller wasted version. One day the nurse tells me that Mel is wanting me to stop by and visit.. she's doing really good. She also told me.. "You know she dresses up for you?" She would have the nurse comb her hair.. she even had her pretty nightgown set aside to wear when I was in the house. She had 3 or 4 different nightgowns to wear so she wouldn't always have to wear hospital gowns. But one was her favorite.. apparently she only wore it when I was there. Our total time together over this 6 or 8 month time span.. maybe a few hours total. 5 minutes here ... 10 minutes there.. it always had to be me that visited.. and I was in no shape.. and as soon as I could get up.. I was gone. We had a few movie nights. I did make her watch Star Wars.. she said she liked it.. but I remember that we always talked thru the movies.. so I don't think she even really watched it. She made me feel better.. first by motivating me to get up and walk.. but mostly by her relentlessly cheerful attitude. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you.. she was barely alive.. 19 years old.. but looked like a 10 year old who been hit by a bus. Yet there she lay.. smiling all the while. In her prettiest nightgown. One Sunday afternoon theres a knock on my door.. Kat was out shopping and I was sick on the couch watching the kiddies. I open it and there's 2 older people standing there.. GREAT.. church people.. I'm so not up for this.. I'm sick. But they weren't church people.. they were Mel's parents. MEL DIED YESTERDAY. They had gotten my address from one of the nurses.. she knew that I'd want to know. They told me how greatful they were to me. Mel loved me.. she talked about me all the time.. her mom told me she had the biggest crush on me.. if course I knew it.. but I'm choking back tears while these people I've never met tell me I was literally the only friend she ever had. She'd been born sick and wasn't expected to make it to puberty. But she stayed around for almost 20 years. Mom tells me that her numbers were always up when I was in the hospital. About how her friend Steve was back in and we're going watch such and such movie maybe tomorrow aftetnoon. About how they'd always wanted to meet me.. but she didn't want them to embarrass her in front of her friend! Dad was a butcher.. he offered to make my whole family a barbeque.. they wanted to do something for me. I was too sick to eat anything then.. but got their number and promised to call when I was up and around. I never did. Not long after Mel died. I quit going to the hospital. It wasn't her death.. it was a bunch of reasons.. mostly I felt like something had to change. But I'll tell you that story another time. Before they left my doorway.. I asked the one question I never even thought to ask Mel. I knew what diseases she had..I can't recall what they were.. some long medical thing that doesn't really do the disease justice.. like toxohistiplasmosis leukasemia. It's just a bunch of letters slapped together to try to explain the death of a beautiful young woman. Who gives a shit what you call it. I asked them.. " what is Mel short for anyways? I never asked her. Was it Melody? Or Melony?" Her name was Melissa I was her only friend for a very short period of time. And she absolutely changed my life. Her parents are likely long gone.. they appeared to be in their 60s back then.. they had no other children. Kathleen and I are probably the only people who know this person even exsisted.. even if only for brief moment in time. But she did exsist.. And she helped shape the course of my life.. simply because of who she was. She did exsist.. and I was her friend.

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