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#davos seaworth
jeyneofpoole · 2 months
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acok dash simulator
🐺 winterscumming
i’m sorry but the lannisters licherally can’t expect us to just ignore what they did to our liege lord lmao???? sitting up there on that jank throne like i won’t answer the summons as soon as lord starks’ kid calls the banners goddddds the blonde hair makes those cunts stupid. also the incest probably. what is the north known for again??? forgetting??? that’s what i thought…….
🦁 gains-of-castamere
typical northern scum lmao. bring up the ‘incest’ allegations all you want but nobody’s ever allowed to mention stark’s actual bastard as if it’s just, like, fine????? we’ll see who’s laughing when king joffrey seizes your lands and holdfasts ig
🧜‍♂️ womanderly
cersei lannister isn’t gonna fuck you bro
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⛓️ iron-pryce
you will never fucking guess what i saw lady asha and lord greyjoy’s other kid doing on the docks today ohhhhhhhh my god
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🍑 rainbowhard
LORAS TYRELL BESTED BY A WENCH THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFEEEEE
🦄 renlybrocade
she should’ve killed him the realm can afford to lose one twink
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❤️‍🔥 rhollor-wifee
the comet is a sign of his coming
🦊 flor-aunt-it
me and the comet are making out sloppy style
❤️‍🔥 rhollor-wifee
you will burn
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⬛️ dontcallmecrow
not my ass going on the great ranging lmao i should’ve deserted 🙏😭
🐻 lordcommandr
Report to command tent. Immediately.
⬛️ dontcallmecrow
oh my god
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🛶 c-bitch
they really expect me to follow this metrosexual into battle. ok. gold price looking nepo baby cunt he fucking shot todric and i’m just supposed to steal a castle with him. ok!!!!!! i miss asha……..
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🩸 reek
heyyyyyyy i’m in the dungeon fornormal reasons does someone wannacome say hi?
🦑 princee-of-winterfell
ok lol
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🐉 that-one-loyalist
i swear to fucking god i just saw daenerys targaryen burn down the house of the undying????? queen???? hello???
🐴 in-the-whoarde
likely place for her to be
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⚓️ sonsshine
i love my dad i love boats this is great we’re going to blackwater next i’m sure our victory will be righteous in the eyes of our lord
⚓️ sonsshine
⛵️💥💥💥☠️🟩🟩🌊🌊⛓️🔥🔥🔥⛵️⛵️🟩🟩🌊⛵️🔥🔥🔥🔥💥💥⛓️⛓️⛓️👨‍👦‍👦☠️☠️ ⛵️💥💥💥☠️🟩🟩🌊🌊⛓️🔥🔥🔥⛵️⛵️🟩🟩🌊⛵️🔥🔥🔥🔥💥💥⛓️⛓️⛓️👨‍👦‍👦☠️☠️
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laurellerual · 6 months
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I love this things @melrosing
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longclawshilt · 8 months
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Rating asoiaf characters based on how likely they are to use pocket sand:
Jon Snow - my hot take is that people are very delusional and wrong about Jon. It’s not that he’s too “honorable” or “good” to use pocket sand in a fight coz he’s definitely not above using dirty tricks. But you gotta ask, which Jon is it? Agot-acok!Jon is def not using pocket sand because he thinks it’s dishonorable and a coward’s weapon. Asos!Jon is 8/10 gonna use pocket sand because fuq honor. Adwd and beyond!Jon is 0/10….he’s got something far more devious in his pockets - broken shards of glass.
Dany - yeah she’s using it, 7/10. She’s a smart girl. Like her actions in Astapor and Meereen show that she’s not above using dirty tricks to get ahead. Now how much pocket sand is she willing to use and against who? That’s the question…I can see her hesitating if her opponent is a small child.
Arya - for sure using pocket sand 10/10. There’s no denying it. She’s actually studied which types of sand are the best suited for different situations. But she’s quick enough that people don’t know what happened until she’s far away.
Bran - he doesn’t even know what pocket sand is so 0/10
Sansa - she knows what pocket sand is but she’s usually not willing to use it because it gets her clothes and hands dirty. If she’s really pushed…maybe? 2/10 but she’d gladly watch someone else do it
Robb - oh 20/10 using it no doubt. He’s been pushing Jon to get on the pocket sand trend for years to no avail
Theon - went with Robb to the pocket sand factory for a boys’ date out. 20/10 using it and with RELISH
Ned Stark - knows what pocket sand is, is unwilling to use it himself, but will turn the other way when he sees his buddy whip it out 0/10
Cat - yeah she’s using it, I’m not willing to debate over this 10/10
Davos - um yeah 10/10 using it….look sometimes you have to use all the tools available to you to survive
Jaime - trick question because which Jaime? Pre-hand chop Jaime? Won’t use it on principle. It’s cowardly and stupid. Post-hand chop Jaime? Yeah….he’s using it because he has to so 8/10
Brienne - look she doesn’t want to use it, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do 6/10
Pod - *confused* “why would anyone carry sand in their pockets to a fight?” 0/10
Howland Reed - was actually the one who invented the best sand for it and is mass producing it. Probably used it to defeat Arthur Dayne 100/10
Meera - come on, she’s swamp person and howland’s kid so 20/10 using pocket sand
Bronn - involved in an MLM to sell pocket sand 100/10
Tyrion - the one who founded the MLM and recruited Bronn so 200/10
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extraordinary-heroes · 6 months
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Game of Thrones by Matias Bergara
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lislemons · 1 month
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asoiaf characters with posts that remind me of them pt 1
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catofoldstones · 7 months
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This is it. This is the whole book. Everyone go home.
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shripscapi · 1 year
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Team Dragonstone !! I love their antics
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driften-sea-snake · 3 months
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stannis baratheon in his post-blackwater depression era is so relatable. like he summons davos from the dungeons to make him hand of the king when it’s already night. i too put off tasks throughout the entire day and then try to do everything at 9 pm so i don’t feel like i wasted another day
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redrikki · 2 months
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A friend of mine once described a person as "someone who has never cleaned a toilet and it shows." Since all the main POVs in A Song of Ice and Fire are nobles, they pretty much all live and die as people who've never cleaned a toilet (and it shows). The following are the exceptions:
Davos Seaworth has cleaned many a toilet on his rise from Fleabottom urchin to smuggler captain to landed knight and would gladly do so again if Lord Stannis required it. He does not see anything remarkable about it, although it does occasionally give him pause that his boys have not and never will clean a toilet. He's not sure whether this is a good or bad thing.
Tyrion Lannister likes to think that he's cleaned a toilet. After all, he's a dwarf and, as a young man, his father made him the Master of Drains and Toilets at the Rock. In his quest to earn his father's respect as the best Master of Drains and Toilets ever, he closely observed the cleaning of the toilets in order to better understand the process. He considers himself something of an expert. He has never actually cleaned a toilet.
Jon Snow is made to clean toilets during his training period in the Night's Watch. As the son of Ned Stark, he thinks he's too good for that shit and this attitude wins him no friends among his peers. After the little lecture from the blacksmith, he makes a monumental effort to pull his head from his ass, but still throws a hissy fit over being made Lord Commander's personal steward instead of a ranger like he's supposed to be. As Lord Commander himself, he never cleans a toilet, but is obsessed with their supply of toilet paper.
Samwell Tarly is also made to clean toilets as part of Night's Watch initiation. It is another in a line of gross, difficult, humiliating things he is forced to do which he insists he's too craven to manage, but does anyway.
Arya Stark is made to clean toilets as a slave in Harrenhall. She hates everyone involved, including herself for being a toilet-cleaning mouse and not a wolf. She hates it marginally less after her murder-by-proxy spree, but vows never to do it again after her escape. She ends up cleaning toilets in the House of Black and White, but tells herself it's her choice, she can stop any time, some people join death cults to cope.
Theon Greyjoy is forced to clean toilets as part of the trauma and humiliation conga that is his time as Reek. It is way less worse than being flayed, he tells himself as Ramsay makes him do it with his tongue. He somehow manages to avoid dying of fecal-based diseases, just like he's somehow avoided dying of any of the many, many things that aught to have killed him by this point.
Davos Seaworth is literally the only one who is remotely normal about cleaning toilets.
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luskbook · 3 months
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finally watched got. drew my favorite characters
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georgescitadel · 2 months
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1st year of George's Citadel - a compilation of quotes from George R.R. Martin
House Targaryen
On the construction of Daenerys and the decision to include dragons in ASOIAF
On Daenerys’ thought process in Lhazarene
On Daenerys’ struggle with rule (1)
On future revelations about the house with the red door
On what led to Robert’s rebellion
On the difference between Daenerys and Aegon’s (I) approach to the throne
On Daenerys subverting gender roles
On the information provided about Rhaegar and Lyanna in ASOIAF
On the “White Saviour” complaints over Daenerys’ storyline
On Daenerys’ future return to Westeros
On Daenerys’ struggle with rule (2)
House Stark
On Sansa’s manipulation at the hands of the Small Council
On Arya and Sansa’s desire to save Ned
On what led Sandor to seek out Sansa during the Battle of Blackwater
On his regret over not further developing Sansa and Arya’s relationships with Catelyn
On what character he’d want to be like
On Ned's inadequacy in King's Landing
House Lannister
On Jaime, Tyrion and loss
On Jaime’s decision to kill Bran
On feeling conflicted over the writing of Tyrion in A Dance With Dragons
On Robert being unsuspicious of the paternity of Joffrey, Myrcella and Tommen
On the key event that led Roose to align with the Lannisters
On his intention writing the Lannister POV’s
On similarities between Tywin Lannister and Walter White
House Greyjoy
On the character of Reek
Game Of Thrones
On GOT’s decision to kill off Silver
On GOT’s decision to pair Arya and Tywin up
Miscellaneous
On writing outcasts
On nihilism in ASOIAF
On unfairly hated characters
On the title of A Game Of Thrones
On Epic Fantasy
On his favourite characters in ASOIAF
On the greyest characters in ASOIAF
On unlikable protagonists
On the historical figures that inspired the women of ASOIAF
On father issues in ASOIAF
On the religions in ASOIAF
On creating foils
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jeyneofpoole · 6 months
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stannis is the general manager of the world's worst olive garden. davos is his favorite assistant manager and sometimes stannis takes him into the walk-in and licks the stumps of his fingers in a normal way. jon is his least favorite but he runs that shit like the navy which stannis respects except he's literally held jon down before to wipe the eyeliner off of his face because he hates emos. jon cries in the walk-in. after the fingersucking. oh also it's important that you know in this au stannis did still cut off davos's fingers himself and that's not like normal they're just fucking crazy. the pasta at this place sucks shit.
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st-clements-steps · 1 month
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When I did this poll someone did mention thinking I’d asked who was the most relatable character, so let’s go, especially after asking this. I’ve gone the POV characters with the highest number of chapters
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stannis the middle child and his emotional support smuggler
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boatmediatourney · 2 months
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🌊Sad Soggy Boat Men Tournament🌊
Round 2B, match 1
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Propaganda and image sources under the cut (warning for possible spoilers):
propaganda for Izzy Hands:
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gif from here
propaganda for Davos Seaworth:
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salialenart · 3 months
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Davos: Are you good or evil, my lady?
Melisandre: Oh, good. I am a knight of sorts myself, sweet ser. A champion of light and life.
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