#dark neil if ur out there...

[ariaste]

The Magic Trick You Didn’t See: Being An Analysis of Good Omens Season 2

(or: Neil Gaiman, Your Brain is Gorgeous But I Have Cracked Your Sneaky Little Code And Have You Dead To Rights*) (*Maybe)

***

Soooooo I just spent the last 48 hours having a BREATHTAKING GALAXY BRAIN EPIPHANY about Good Omens Season 2 and feverishly writing a fuckin16,000 word essay about the incredible magic trick that @neil-gaiman pulled off. 

Yes, it’s long, but I PROMISE your brains will explode. Do you want to know how magic works? Do you want to know what Metatron’s deal is (I’m like 99% sure of this and it’s EXTREMELY FUCKING GOOD)? Do you want to know about the Mystery of the Vanishing Eccles Cakes and the big fat beautiful clue I found in the opening credits? Do you go through the whole inventory of Chekov’s Firearm & Heavy Artillery Discount Warehouse? 

Here is the essay, go read it: https://docs.google.com/document/d/193IXS11XN46lziHRb6eUpM17yK0BQkRqke1Wh64A_e0/ When ur done u can tell me I’m an insane crackpot, and u know what, i won’t even be offended

In case you don’t know whether you want to bother reading the whole enormous thing on google docs, I’ve put the first couple sections of it under the cut. JUST TRUST ME OKAY, HEAR ME OUT, THIS IS VERY EXTREMELY COOL, NEIL IS GOOD AT HIS JOB--

Proem

A dark theater. The rustling of the audience: clothes, breathing, whispers of anticipation. The lights come up. A man enters, stage left. He is a magician—a master magician—and he performs for you a magic trick so good and so subtle... that you don’t even notice you’ve seen it. 

You know there must have been a trick—after all, you came to the theater to see a trick performed, didn’t you? And he claims to be a magician. So there had to be a trick somewhere. There had to be.

But maybe there wasn’t. Maybe there was just a man on a stage, talking to you, telling you a story with a strangely unsatisfying ending you didn’t quite understand. 

I know. This is a weird beginning to an analysis essay. But hear me out, because I have to explain the mechanisms of the stage before I can show you what the trick was, where the trapdoor was hidden, and how Neil Gaiman pulled the whole thing off so gently and elegantly that you didn’t notice a thing. Ready? Here we go.

The Facts As We Know Them

Let us begin by establishing a baseline—some fundamental, logical assumptions that underpin the magic trick. These will seem obvious as soon as I say them, which is precisely the point: They are self-evident, loadbearing foundations for my entire argument, and if I don’t point them out, I’m going to sound like a crackpot conspiracy theorist. (Which! To be fair, I might be. I could easily be wrong about all this—but I don’t think I am.)

Our baseline, loadbearing assumptions that preface my Grand Unified Theory of Season 2: 

1. Neil Gaiman is extremely good at his job.

2. Neil Gaiman loves these characters and wants with all his heart to do them justice; likewise, he has a great deal of respect, love, and admiration for Terry Pratchett and is striving VERY HARD to write the show the way Terry would have been happy with.

3. The devil, as they say, is in the details: Neil Gaiman and the entire Good Omens cast/crew are fully capable of doing extremely subtle detail work, as conclusively proven in Season 1 Ep 6, specifically the whole sequence of the body-swap scenes.

With me so far? Great.

The Elephant In The Room

Season 2 was... odd. It was odd, wasn’t it. This isn’t a matter of whether you loved it or hated it—there was just something odd going on.

I spent the entirety of my first viewing very much enjoying myself and being very happy to be back with these characters and this world, but I was also liveblogging to my groupchat as I went, and a theme soon began emerging:

“Neil, what are you doing? Where are you going with this?” “What in god’s name is going on here? I’m so lost lmao.” “What is going on with the music situation?” “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE NEIL” “zombies, ok, I trust u to pull this all together in the end, Neil, but I still don't know what you're up to” “What is going on LOL” “Incredibly what is going on here” “NEIL! WHAT IS HAPPENING!” “Literally what is happening” “Neil Gaiman why have you constructed a regency au for mystery VIBES reasons” “just????????? lesbians????????? dancing what's HAPPENING. just all the background characters are gay here ok sure sure sure NEIL GAIMAN WHAT IS HAPPENING--” “mmmmmmm neil what u doin”

All these are copied verbatim from my liveblogging, and apparently I am not the only one to have this reaction. And to be clear, I was having a good time! I came out to this theater to see a magic trick, and this Neil Gaiman guy on stage is a master magician—but I didn’t see the trick, even though there must have been a trick. 

At first, I wasn’t sure how I felt about the season. I wanted to like it! Indeed, there were many things that I liked about it! But I felt a bit muddled and jumbled up and confused—I felt like there was something I didn’t understand about it, and so I couldn’t yet understand how I felt about it either.

I started chewing on this question in a friend’s DMs: Why is season 2 so fucking odd? What is going on here, Neil? What are you up to? The matter of whether he was up to something was never in question. I knew that he had to be up to something. Writers are always up to something, and as I watched season 2, it was as if I was watching Neil scamper around the room with a mischievous expression as he messed with things here and there and made little tweaks and adjustments to the arrangement of all the Chekov’s guns he’s stockpiling on the mantelpiece. 

You see, Season 2 has some very bad writing in it. HANG ON, DON’T ARGUE WITH ME YET! THIS IS NOT A JUDGMENT CALL!! This is the rug that the trick’s secret mechanism is hidden under!!! This is the hidden mirror that makes the trick work!!!!! This is the trapdoor in the stage!

Yes, of course I will explain myself.

Neil Gaiman is a master magician, but I am a pretty damn good magician myself—I’m a professional fantasy author who has published nine books, and I teach workshops for apprentice writers online and at universities—and if there is one thing I have learned about the process of achieving mastery of your craft, it is this: 

Regardless of what medium they’re working in, the apprentice artist is concerned primarily with achieving realism via an expansion of their control—control of their brush strokes as they paint a photorealistic eye; control of their deck of cards, the mechanisms of their magic tricks, and where the audience’s attention is being directed; control of all the little factors of voice, plot, character, setting, suspense and surprise that go into writing a good story. However, the master artist has achieved that control—so much so that it often looks effortless to an untrained eye—and sometimes the master artist returns to a messy, amateurish style simply because they have control even over this too. 

As an example, consider Picasso and his entire body of work. He begins as an apprentice focused on achieving control, doing portraits of people that look like people—like what we expect a portrait of a person to look like. Then, as he grows in skill and gradually achieves mastery, he pulls away from realism. He develops a style, he experiments with faces that don’t look like any human alive  colored in ways that do not appear in nature. He expands his control. His work becomes abstract. Towards the end of his life, he starts experimenting with what’s called “Naive art”, something that a 5 year old could theoretically draw... but you have to achieve mastery before you can do it on purpose and have it look good. 

On one hand, Neil Gaiman is extremely good at his job. On the other hand, Season 2 has bad writing in it.

What does that tell us?

Well, we know from our Baseline Assumptions that Neil Gaiman is simply too good of a writer to fuck up through garden-variety clumsiness and lack-of-control the way an apprentice writer would. Additionally, he cannot fuck up by accident in this case because I am positive that the man is scrutinizing his work on Good Omens far too closely to let anything slide—for Crowley and Aziraphale’s sakes, for David and Michael’s sakes, and especially for Terry’s sake. The stakes are sky-high, and he cares too much to write a weird, kind of “bad” season by accident.

Which leaves only one option: He did it on purpose.

(Am I sounding like a crackpot conspiracy theorist? Baby, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet. I’m gonna get SO MUCH MORE CRACKPOT.)

If he did it on purpose, then the natural question to ask is: WHY!?!?!??

It’s a great question. Not “Why?” in terms of why he as an individual person with emotions would decide to do that, mind you. More like, “What purpose does this serve for the structure of the narrative?” There is a story he is intending to tell, and out of all the choices he could have possibly made, for some reason this one was necessary and correct in order to achieve that end goal—so what was that reason?

See? Intentionality. He knows exactly what details he left in, and he did it on purpose. (Editing! It’s important!)

So there has to be a reason. It’s like when a master magician “casually” rubs an itch on his nose—why did he do that? What is he sneakily slipping into his mouth by hiding it under the excuse of this little gesture that does not even register to you as meaningful? (If you haven’t watched enough stage magic to know what I mean, watch this.)

This question is, of course, impossible to simply answer out of thin air without any further evidence. It is a dead end—so we must adjust the question and come at it from a different angle.

The one I settled on when I was chewing on this was: Well, okay, what do I mean when I say “bad writing”? What is it about S2 that makes it feel so goddamn odd?

The Pledge, The Turn, and... The Conspicuous, Expectant Silence

There are three parts to a magic trick: Pledge, Turn, Prestige. 

First, the Pledge: You show the audience something ordinary. Second, the Turn: You make that ordinary thing do something extraordinary, like vanish. Third, the Prestige: You bring the ordinary thing back.

To quote the 2006 film The Prestige just after its explanation of the first two parts: “You want to be fooled. But you wouldn’t clap yet, because making something disappear isn’t enough. You have to bring it back.”

You have to bring it back.

When I teach apprentice writers, I call this a “setup-payoff cycle”. Achieving control and dexterity with this tool is crucial, because the setup-payoff cycle is the engine of the story—it’s what makes the story run. You can have a setup-payoff cycle at any scale—I have read ones that were a single sentence long; I’ve read ones that were two books long. Additionally, all jokes, no matter how long they are, are structured on a setup/payoff cycle. These cycles work precisely the same way a magic trick does:

You set up the audience’s expectations. (Optional but generally considered stylish and elegant: You give those expectations a firm jolt to throw the audience off-balance.) You pay off the audience’s expectations in a way they weren’t expecting, while saying “TA DA!!!!” really loud with your arms flung wide.

Audiences really like this. A setup-payoff cycle executed just right makes the audience’s brains light up like Times Square and hammers on their mental “reward” buttons like nothing else. It’s like you’ve personally handed them a cookie and a gold star. They go wild for this.

Here’s an example of a setup-payoff cycle, though it’s not a perfect one—and you’ve probably heard it before, so you’re not going to be throwing chairs and tearing down the theater from sheer glee:

The Setup: Knock knock. Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? The Jolt: (the joke starts over and repeats several times without reaching the payoff (aka the prestige) while the audience grows more and more annoyed and frustrated about the unfulfilled expectations, until finally...) Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? The Payoff: ORANGE YOU GLAD I DIDN’T SAY BANANA?

Good Omens Season 2 feels so fucking odd because the setup-payoff cycles are incomplete—nearly all of them are, and the ones that do close the loop do so in really weird ways which, as a professional author, make me feel kind of, “Bwuh?????? But where’s my cookie? Excuse me??? Sir???? Neil????? My cookie, tho???”

When I realized this, when I finally put my finger on why the whole season was giving me some uncanny valley heebie-jeebies, a chill ran down my spine. (The rest is here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/193IXS11XN46lziHRb6eUpM17yK0BQkRqke1Wh64A_e0/ I’M GOING TO GO STARE INTO THE ABYSS NOW BYE)

#good omens #good omens season 2 #ineffable husbands #neil gaiman

[adarkrainbow]

As it turns out, I should never say "never" because despite what I claimed earlier, I still have one more "Hansel and Gretel" post to make! This one I wanted to make for a long time but simply forgot about, and so I'll make it now to conclude my long series of "Hansel and Gretel" posts. (I also do think it is time to make a new masterpost soon)

And in this post, I want to talk about Neil Gaiman's Hansel and Gretel.

"What?" you ask. "Neil Gaiman did a Hansel and Gretel story? When? Where?". And indeed, many people seem to have overlooked it, but the author of pieces such as "Coraline", "The Graveyard Book", "Sandman", "Stardust" and many more has done an illustrated book for children retelling the story of Hansel and Grtel - with accompanying illustrations by Lorenzo Mattoti. Illustrations that do set the tone for the story, since they are black and white illustrations in the style of shadow-puppets, presenting small, featureless characters in vast, enormous, dark landscapes.

It was released all the way back in 2014 (October or November if I recall well?)

Given this book as made for children, and not much talked about, it is a bit hard to get, and is not placed on the same shelves as Gaiman's other adult and teenage-oriented works. I personally only could have an experience of the story by listened to "read-through" and audio versions of the book, unable to get any physical copy - but maybe it is just because live in France? I don't know.

But of course I cannot ignore what Neil friggn' Gaiman would have done with "Hansel and Gretel". Neil Gaiman is famous for his fairytale-inspired works, but to my knowledge most of what he did was either fairytale-fantasy (Coraline, Stardust), either dark, mature and twisted retellngs of fairytales (Snow, Glass, Apples ; The Sleeper and the Spindle). I think it was the first time Neil Gaiman did a straight retelling of a fairytale, directly aimed at children.

Which is fascinating because I read something about it in a book recently. Remember when I told you about this book about fairytale villains - a book which disappointed me because it wasn't a character study and more of a general look at the publication and "sanitization" of fairytales today. Well this book still contained fascinating parts and tidbits - and one of them was an explanation that, the rewrite of a classic fairytale for children was one of those "initiation rites" or "obligatory steps" in a writer's career. The writing - not the invention, but the rewrite - of a famous fairytale is one of the most common "exercice of style" a writer can perform. Because they are forced to keep the basic story, the main plotline, the core tale, and can't change it too much... But they have to shine by the little details. The tone of the story, the way they fill some plotholes, or how they smooth or erase certain details, or certain traits they give to the characters. Little details, little changes, but that reflect how well they handle a story or what message they want to carry through the tale.

And what are those small changes Gaiman brings to the tale? I won't copy-paste the whole story here of course, but be warned of spoilers as I will break down the little things Gaiman added or changed compared with the original tale.

The opening of the tale pecises that it was uring the time of the reader/listenr's "grandmothers", or perhaps in the time of their grandmothers' grandfathers. All in all, it was back when "we all lived at the edge of the great forest".

There is an explicit mention that Gretel is the oldest sister, Hansel the youngest, and they are two years apart. Gretel used to be called Greta, and her birthname is Margaret ; while Hansel's birthname was "Hans", which his parents turned to Hansel because "they could not make it shorter".

Neil Gaiman depicts a specific family life for the children. Hansel and Gretel did not go to school, because school was far away from the forest near which they lived, and it needed money - too much money for the humble life of a woodcutter. However their father "taught them the way of the woods", while their mother taught them skills such as sewing, cooking and cleaning. Hansel and Gretel's parents were not the best in the world - their mother was bitter and sharp-tongued, and their father was a sullen man always eager to be away from his little house. But the children were happy as long as they could play in the forest, climb on trees, swim in nearby trees - and have enough food. The narration details the different foods and meals the family could afford during the "better days", when their father was paid well for his wood. Regular meals involved cabbages, fresh bread, eggs, things of the sort - and when they had more money, their father bought meat from the butcher, or a live animal that they killed and ate themselves. But even then, there was still some beast to capture in the woods - some rabbits to catch or ducks to find. The narrator insists "There was always food". [Oh yes, forgot to mention - no stepmother here, Gaiman reused the original story involving only the children's mother]

The reason for the family's bad situation is explicitly referred to as a war followed by a famine. It began when soldiers arrived and stole the cabbages, the chickens and the ducks - they were men motivated by a mixture of anger, hunger, boredom and fear. The local farmers were either taken and forced to be new soldiers, or killed by other soldiers - their fields either burned by the war, or left to rot since nobody could tend to them. Hansel and Gretel's own house was located far away from the war, and their father never knew why the soldiers went fighting or who they were fighting - all they knew that was there was the war, and the soldiers were fighting. But the household felt the effect of the war as the butcher lacked meat to sell, the baker didn't have any more flour to bake, and the family could only have scarse and bad or stale food.

The dialogue where the mother convinces her husband to abandon the children relies on emotion vs logic. The mother acts purely and entirely out of logic - and even claims it herself. She says that it is better for two people to die than four ; she explains that if the father doesn't eat and deprive himself for his children, he won't be able to cut the wood/earn money and they'll all die of starvation ; she also adds that it isn't about killing the children, but about losing them in the woods. Maybe some kind stranger will help them and care for them! she says - only for the father to reply in anger "Maybe a bear will devour them!". But despite's the father emotional refusal, the mother still ends up convincing him somehow. (There is also the mention that Hansel was listening to the conversation because he was so hungry he couldn't sleep - though he said nothing and refused to complain, given he knew how difficult the situation was)

The clue that makes Hansel understand his father accepted their mother's idea is because one morning he claims he will take the children into the woods and teach them how to cut the wood - something which is unusual since before their father always refused to let them accompany him to work, saying the woods were too dangerous for children.

The father here asks the children to sit down in a grove of birch trees and wait for him: he creates a small fire for them to sit by, and even offers them his lunch, promising to return for them. Hansel knows he won't - but Gretel stays convinced that they must wait and that their father is merely "delayed", until finally she has to admit he won't come back. (Hopefully Hansel had prepared the pebbles)

When the children return to their house, their father (who has been noted to have a crimson face and teary eyes, as if he had been crying and drinking) is so happy he offers them two syrup-covered cherries. This is no random decision, as they are kept in a jar in the house - a jar which once was full but now is almost empty. And as the children slowly savor their cherries, their mother, pale and with pinched leeps, looks hungrily at the four leftover cherries in the jar...

The next attempt at losing the children (and this second one is the successful one) happens a few weeks after the first. This time Hansel is caught unprepared, as their father announces he takes them in the woods one morning, right now, on the spot, without Hansel having heard anything the night before. This is why he must use one of the two freshly-baked loaves of bread their mother baked them for the morning.

There is an insistance on how deep and far their father takes them, compared to the first time. They pass by creepy trees that look like "scraping and scratching hands", then their father helps them cross a river, showing them where to go and where it's too deep ; they reach a deeper part of the forest where the enormous twisted trees as like "giants frozen in time", and there is the poetic line of the thorns and brambles of the forest constantly gripping the clothes of the kids, as if to try to keep them here and prevent them from going further.

The second time they are abandoned, it is Gretel who is the first to admit and recognize their father won't be coming back - showing that she learned from her first experience.

When the children discover the birds (wood pigeons) eating the bread, while Hansel says nothing, Gretel takes pity upon them, commenting that even the animals of the forest are hungry.

It is not a bird that attracts the children to the house - but the sweet and warm smell of gingerbread, that Hansel catches first, and then Gretel. A smell of honey cakes, and ginger, and spices, that makes their stomach hurt and makes them run with hunger towards the source of the scent.

The house of the witch is described as smaller than the one of Hansel and Gretel, and made of fresh gingerbread. It is decorated with green and red candies of hard-sugar, and the window panes are also clear sugar.

Like in the first-edition version of the Grimm tale (which obviously seems to be Gaman's main source), the witch does have a creepy little rhyme as she comes out of the house "Who nibbles my house? Is it a mouse?" she says with a gentle and amused voice), and the children do not answer, speechless (but their mouth too full). However, as the narrator points out, they are relieved after a moment of scare, to see that it is "no ogre or monster" that comes out of te house, but a "kindly-faced old woman with dim eyes", hobbling around and using a cane/stick to walk.

The inside of the house is described as having just a single room, with a "huge brick oven" on one end. The other main furniture of the house is a table, though later the text also mentions two little beds prepared for Hansel and Gretel (but that are quickly removed after their first night), and the witch's own bed.

The meal the old woman first offers the children is made of candied fruits, cakes, pies, cookies, biscuits, and all sorts of other delicious treats - but as the children note, there is absolutely no meat. When asked about it, the old woman has a long explanation which is FILLED with creepy foreshadowing. The woman says that she has grown too old and too short-sighted to be hunting animals in the forest. That now, all she can do is "lay her bait" in the forest and hope it catches something - and she complains that even if she does manage to capture something, the creature will be too scrawny and need a good fattening up. "But now that you are here, perhaps now there will be meat once again".

The deep sleep the children fall into after their first meal at the woman's house is explicitly caused by drugs that the old woman placed in their food. Now, the VERY interesting thing in Neil Gaiman's retelling is that nowhere the word "witch" appears in the story. It is clear that the old woman has magic - but she is never called anything else than "the old woman", leaving her true nature more ambiguous. The only "reveal" the narrator tells us after confirming that the children were drugged into sleep, is that the old woman was much stronger than she let them believed - as she had a horrible, "sinewy" strength to her.

Hansel is locked up in a cage with rusty metal bars, inside a stable behind the house - with nothing in it but straw and a "few ancient, well-chewed bones". Every day she serves him lots of food, "cakes, potatoes, candied fruits, puddings, gruels, crumbles" and many more dishes. She also stays by his side until he finishes everything - and carefully listens to make sure he eats every dish until there is nothing, poking him with her stick if he ever complains about being too full or unable to eat. Gretel, meanwhile, finds herself chained to the table and unable to leave the house - in fact she doesn't see her brother until the end of te tale, staying alone with no contact with him for a very long time. The old woman forces Gretel to clean the house and cook for her, and if she doesn't do her chores quick enough, the old one beats her and insults her.

Neil Gaiman adds a fascinating detail to the way the old woman treats Gretel. When she is in a good mood, she promises to care for Gretel, and to protect her as she will grow into a woman. She also promises to teach her all her secrets, three of which are explicitely named: to call the birds down from the trees (implying she might have sent the wood pigeons devour their food, though it is a subtext monly) ; to ensnare travellers (the scent of the gingerbread house was described in ways implying it was much more powerful than regular gingerbread scent should be) ; and to make sure anyone that comes to the cottage never leaves. But, as the narrator points out, an hour or so after each of these promises, the old one would be back to scolding Gretel and telling her she was a good for nothing. Gretel in turn barely speaks to the old woman, merely saying one word or two, to the point the old woman starts to believe she might be a "half-wit".

One month or so after first being imprisoned, the old woman decides to eat Hansel because she has been running out of patience - but she still doesn't want to eat Gretel apparently. In fact she has this horrible line, "We will roast your brother, but do not be sad: I'll give you the bones to chew, little one." And when, after playing dumb, Gretel pushes the old woman into the oven, there is another great line: "The girl had learned more from the woman than she thought."

After burning the old woman, Gretel steals her keys from under the woman's pillow and sets herself and her brother free, and they hug in the sunshine... But Neil Gaiman insists on the fear and slight trauma the two kids went through. Gretel doesn't just push the old woman and lock the door - she holds the door tight, she listens until the horrible screams of the woman die out, and still then she fears of letting go of the door, fearing the hag would somehow come back from the fire and crawl out of the oven. And when she sets Hansel free, she is puzzled and she marvels at two things 1) at how her little brother turned into a "plump young man" (after all she hasn't seen him for a whole month, during which he was force-fed fattening witch-food) and 2) at how he mysteriously holds a little bone in his hand, as if his whole life depended on it (the reader knows why Hansel clings on to this bone ; Gretel does not).

The children still make sure the old woman is truly dead: they return to the house (now filled with the smell of burned human flesh), and once the oven cooled down they open it to see the charcoaled, blackened husk of their tormentor... And a little iron key that, as they discover, opens a chest beneath the old woman's bed. Said best contains all the treasures she took from the many travellers that came to her house: gloves, hats, rings set with rubies and diamonds, gold coins and silver coins, chains of gold and of silver, pearl necklaces, clothes of satin and silk... The children quickly replace their old rags with new clothes from the chest, put all the jewels, gems and coins they can in a big bag, and leave the house.

Since Neil Gaiman based his retelling on the first-edition version of the tale, there is no duck to help the children cross the stream. They simply come across the same river they had encountered at the beginning of the tale, and use what their father had taught them then, so as to cross in the most shallow area of the water. They then return to the part of the forest they are the more familiar with - the one where they played and climbed on trees. And fnally they return home...

They do not dare get too close to their home, but they still call out to their parents. Their father answers, overwhelmed with joy, confessing he couldn't sleep or find peace ever since he abandoned them, and that he searched for them every day. The children ask where their mother is - explaining they brought enough riches for her to eat whatever she wants, go wherever she wants, and never fear hunger again. Their father silently gestures at the grave he dug for her. Here the narrator offers several reasons why their mother died: maybe she died of hunger? Maybe something "ate her from the inside". Maybe she died of anger? Maybe she died because of the loss of her children? But ultimately, as the narrator concludes, we will never know.

After doing the traditional conclusion about how the family never lacked anything again, always had food on their table, and solved most of their problems with the newfound wealth, the story goes on for a few more paragraphs. It explains that Hansel and Gretel each ended up marrying happily (though the story does not mention who they married), and that there was so much food at their wedding feasts that the guests "had their belts burst, and fat dripping from their chins". The fairytale concludes with: "And the pale moon looked kindly upon them all."

#hansel and gretel #neil gaiman #neil gaiman's hansel and gretel #lorenzo mattoti #hansel and gretel retellings

[theghostbunnie]

yis yis

Tell about ur hcs I’d love to hear

I don't know where to start I have so many with varying sizes

Anything to do with the main trio's parents I definitely accidentally over developed/hj and gave them all names and backstories

For just the main trio themselves off the top of my head rn: CW animal death mentions.

Neil doesn't feel any particular way about cats, dogs, kittens or puppies. In fact he would tell a dog to shut up for barking/hj He believes the most perfect pet ever is goldfish and he could go on and on about how cool and practical and so on they are. He cannonicaly had lab testing mice at some point that was confiscated from him and didn't seem too bothered when they died.

Idk man I just feel like there's some symbolism in there somewhere about him how he favors what the majority veiws as "the most disposable/boring pet" and doesn't gush over cute ones or more traditional ones to like.

He has a Fallout reference as a sticker on his safe so I took that as he's a fan of the games. He plays fallout and watches game of thrones and he probably likes Skyrim and Marvel too!! Like I don't think he has a problem with magic at all as a *fictional* concept. It's when he can't understand something or make sense of the paranormal it drives him off his rockers.

Nikki makes rubber band bracelets, and collects offbrand Lps and watches the amazing world of gumball on her mom's ipad whenever they're in a place she needs to sit still and she's just enjoying her childhood the best she can living in the vibes fr. She chews on the nails on hand and leaves the other sharp. She probably has a lot of broken action figures and barbie dolls she doesn't know the proper name of like 90% of them and gives them new names. It probably bugs tf out of Neil to watch her call Deadpool Spiderman.

Her relationship with animals as I've noticed, she's not like this Fluttershy type from MLP who has this bleeding heart for all of them, I personally think she veiws herself deeply as one of them. She'll care about the ones she knows personally like they're in her pack. Be intrigued by the ones that are cool, But would also not flinch if one died, "that's the food chain buddy." Infact she's fighting a wolf over a rabbit rn she told me herself.

Max has empathy issues he either feels at 100% or nothing at all and it's anyone's guess how he's gonna feel about anything. This sort of explains the inconsistency in his behavior or if he's gonna feel guilty about something after he does it. He struggles to take interest in hobbies or anything at all, so he's bored nearly all the time and does the stupidest or meanest shit to get a kick out of it. His mom signed him up for tapdancing, piano, and violin lessons and during the school year that fills up alot of his time anyways.

He's very political and infodumps the worst timed dark history facts ever bc he often doesn't know what else to talk about, labeling him as "a depressing mood killer" He has a very strong sense of justice but on a person-to-person level he will say the most sexist, homophobic, fatphobic, things not because he actually believes in those ideals, but bc he's just saying shit to get you mad probably or hurt your feelings.

#fictional characters #camp camp #camp campbell #campcamp #camp camp neil #camp camp nikki #camp camp max #max camp camp #neil camp camp #nikki camp camp #cc nikki #nikki cc #neil cc #cc neil #max cc #cc max #camp camp headcanons #headcannons #my hcs

[carronyaflowers]

Thank you @official-impravidus for the tag!

Rules: Post 10 of your fave movies and tag 10 people.

10. Epic (2013)

When I first watched this, I was such a slut for Josh Hutcherson and Amanda Seyfried. I was so in love with Nod and MK, and Queen Tara + Ronin?? KILL ME

9. Pirates of the Carribean Trilogy

Look at her! She's my queen, my king, my awakening!! And I'm counting the first three films in one because I refuse to separate them. Jack will forever be one of my icons, and Elizabeth + Will will forever be my number 1 ship (even if it doesn't look like it, rhey're my one).

8. 20th Century Girl (2022)

Because this movie made me weep. The friendships! The high school of it all. The first love. 🤧🤧🤧 This is due for a rewatch actually.

7. Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021)

I'm a hoe for these bitches actually. THIS is my justice league. SO FUCKING ICONIC AND PLOT AND CHARACTER ARCS. And henry cavill in that superman suit!!!

6. Lord of the Rings Trilogy

"It's like the great stories, Mr. Frodo, the ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were, and sometimes you didn't want to know the end because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad has happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing this shadow, even darkness must pass. A new day will come, and when the sun shines, it'll shine out the clearer. I know now folks in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going because they were holding on to something. That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo, and it's worth fighting for." <- TURN THAT SHIT UP

5. The Princess Bride (1987)

Ohh another iconic iconic film. It made me laugh it made me cry it comforted me. If i could, i'd sell my soul to watch this again for the first time.

4. Pride and Prejudice (2005)

HANDS AND LONGING AND YEARNING AND PINING AND KEIRA KNIGHTLEY. YOU HAVE BEWITCHED ME. WALKS IN THE MEADOWS. THE MUSEUM HOUSE THINGY.

3. Moonrise Kingdom (2012)

I'm so jealous of Sam and Suzy's love. Just two kids against the world. And it's so so much. Like take me to an island and let's just wander it together. This is so dear to me, JUST TAKE ME TO MOONRISE KINGDOM WHERE WE CAN DANCE ON THE BEACH.

2. Moulin Rouge (2001)

Such a bonus that when i searched moulin rouge to search for gifs, scott and tessa showed up. Anyways, this film THIS FILM. The audacity it had to take my heart and make it believe in love only to rip it to shreds. And forever robbed that come what may wasn't eligible for best music for oscars bc it wasn't originally written for moulin rouge. And also, look at mr mcgregor and ms kidman. someone mash up my fave songs and create an elephant love medley for me.

1. Dead Poets Society (1989)

i miss neil.

Tagging these people bc i'm curious abt ur fave films: @f1-giuki @dreamingamongthestars @newtness532 @pancsaa @alestire @muhtants @nerdypandablizzard @putyourreddresson @xiaoluclair @fabbyf1

#tumblr tag game #movies #carronya.rambles

[nian-7]

こんにちは！元気ですか？⬇️

Hihihii!!! I hope ur cool if I send this request in right now to you :D so may I request a Platonic Matchup for banG dream and project sekai please? 어쨌든, 시작하자!

my name is joey, im 4teen, i have autism, ADHD, schizophrenia, OCD & BPD, im transgender (ftm), aromatic bisexual and unlabeled

appearance wise, im pretty midsize, im 5’6, white skinned, i have dyed black boy hair with bangs, hazel eyes, dark eyebags, piercings, i wear a lot of different styles like goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth and victorian goth), gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome and kigurimin) scenemo/emo, & vkei ouji and lolita, when I’m at home/work/school I wear Streetwear clothes such as baggy stuff and I also wear a lot of Y2K stuff too

I’m a Aquarius, an ENTP/INFP, 4w3 and Extroverted

My top interest is anime/manga, my other main interests are gaming, anthropology, pathology, zoology, music (including Vocal Synths! I’m a vocaloid producer and a regular one too), filmmaking, art(drawing, painting, pottery, digital art, etc), learning instruments, learning languages, tabletop RPGs, rhythm games, cosplaying, watching documentaries, going on walks, taking pictures of things that I think are pretty, collecting figurines/stuffed animals and puppetry, dancing, science/history, and cooking, art is definitely my top main hobby rn, im dedicating a lot of time to it

Im usually awkward at first when I meet someone new, unless if I feel really comfortable or if I’m in a safe situation, when I’m comfortable with a person you CANNOT shut me up, I’ll be rambling about my interests and shit, i have a hard time communicating and understanding social cues due to my autism, my emotions come off as sarcastic or silly, im someone very entertaining and calming to be around with, i have a hard time taking everything seriously, and I find humor in pretty much, i also feel the urge to correct any faulty information, i also talk very differently with my words since some people say I use “BIG” words, for the most part I’m pretty chill— but what some would consider “repressed anger issues” and I can be verbally aggressive when prevoked.

I’m like the dad friend and I have a bad habit of being a therapist for my friends, i like to keep stuff with me when I go out like chapstick and some water bottles for my friends and me as well, i really like to make things for people I’m close with and that includes drawing stuff for them as well, i have a realllllyyy overactive brain. i tend to get really deep and philosophical when I’m left on my own to long, so I try to keep myself and mind occupied with stuff to distract me, i dream to become a lead singer for a vkei band, also I know 6 languages which are Japanese, Korean, Spanish, Arabic, Polish and French

likes: vocaloid/utau, hajime hinata (danganronpa), a silent voice, albedo (genshin impact), felix kranken (twf), bread, sharks, christmas music/christmas in general, scp 3008 (roblox game), get a snack at 4am (roblox game), musicals, hotels, my friends, enstars (switchP + more), rhythm games, doukyuusei, mystic messenger, twf, genshin, lemon demon/neil cicierega in general, breaking bad, eddsworld, homestuck, horimiya, hxh, the great gatsby, saiki k, hamilton (sadly, im sorry.)

dislikes: negitive mentions of my voice, comparing me to people/saying stuff like "you remind me of ____", and spiders

also these are some of my top kins!!:  hiyori tomoe (enstars), yoosung kim (mystic messenger), jumin han (mystic messenger), hanako (tbhk), felix kranken (twf), albedo (genshin impact), shoya ishida (a silent voice), tom (eddsworld), eridan (homestuck), karkat (homestuck), miyamura izumi (horimiya), natsume sakasaki (enstars), sora harukawa (enstars), V (mystic messenger), hagumi kitazawa (bandori), matsubara kanon (bandori), shinji ikari (neon genesis evangelion), lain iwakura (serial experiments lain), hajime hinata (danganronpa) yuno gasai (future diary), gojo satoru (jujutsu kaisen), kangel (needy streamer overdose), ame-chan (needy streamer overdose) urumi akamaki (Alice in borderland) verosika mayday (helluva boss) idia shroud (twisted wonderland) and more....!

merci beaucoup! أتمنى لك يومًا رائعًا!

hii! i hope you find these matchups are sufficient since it's my first time doing one of these. enjoy!

I match you with...

Mizuki Akiyama & Ena Shinonome!

-The three of you are a chaotic trio. They both appreciate you a lot even if they really don't show it. You help them a lot whether it be with mental health or just simple things.

-Mizuki loves your sense of style. They absolutely adore going out shopping with you and finding clothes. It's one of their favorite things to do with whenever you both hang out together.

-They also love to just talk with you, it truly doesn't matter about what. Mizuki loves to just sit and talk and join in if you happen to be making something.

-Ena loves to do art 'challenges' with you if you ever bring one up. She finds them enjoyable and you always make her feel better about her art if she thinks it's not up to her own standards.

-It's an enjoyable friend group and you three always have each others back no matter how much you mess with each other.

I match you with...

Reona (PAREO) Nyubara!

-She adores your style. It doesn't matter what you're wearing, you'll always be receiving compliments from her on your outfits. She thinks they're so unique and fit you so well!

-Reona also loves your rambling about whatever topic you're interested in. She'll listen to you for hours just because she gets excited about it as well!

-The amount of foreign languages you know surprises her and she always loves to hear them all. It's so interesting to her to hear so many different languages.

-She always wants to repay you for all the cute things you make her! She cherishes them all and has them in her room. She'll do her best to somehow repay you for how nice you are to her!

please do not repost any of my work without my permission, thank you for reading.

#fluff #gender neutral reader #nian-mutuals #bang dream #bang dream girls band party #bandori #pareo #reona nyubara #mizuki akiyama #ena shinonome

[diagnosed-anxiety-disorder]

I AM LOSING MY MIND OVER A SONIC ROCK BAND AU SO IMMA MAKE A BUNCH OF HEADCANONS BECAUSE I CANNOT CONTAIN THIS

this is what happens when you mix an emo punk rock fan with the sonic universe-

Sonic - Lead singer / guitar (kinda like Billie Joe Armstrong or Dexter Holland) Shadow - guitar / backing vocals (Frank Iero. NEED I SAY MORE) Tails - keyboardist / synth / DJ (it's giving Cumulus from Ghost or Sid from Slipknot) Silver - bass guitar (maybe even like the Geddy Lee pedal set up too) Knuckles - drummer (with the Neil Peart drum set up and CC from BVB vibes)

Sonic: pop punk vibe!!

probably shreads too fast on the guitar and loses his guitar picks every goddamn minute so he has his entire mic stand covered with those guitar pick holders

does the thing that Freddy Mercury does where he picks up the mic stand and walks around while singing

definitely crowd surfs and tells the mosh pit to go wild

*kicks over amp* AAAAAAAA

has random stickers over EVERYTHING, guitar case, guitar, you name it

reads all of the signs in the audience and sometimes replies to them

stops the show in the middle and starts ranting about literally whatever

*trips over every wire possible* IM OKAY!!

comes up with lyrics with Shadow. sonic's better at delivering than composing

mini list of songs he would FUCK UP /pos

Pretty Fly (For A White Guy) by The Offspring

The Zoo by Scorpions (him and Shadow are probably obsessed with the Scorpions bc theyre a good band with rock ballads)

Fist Bump from Sonic Forces (i hc that he sings this as a duet with Shadow. i feel like their voices would go well together)

MeMe from Miligram (i also hc that Sonic knows Japanese if it isnt canon)

In Too Deep by Sum 41

Shadow: classic rock, hard rock, rock ballads, heavy metal and EMO

he either stays in one place the whole show or runs around

Frank Iero chaotic energy i wanna see him go wild

contrasting to his introverted personality, on stage since the audience is all dark and he cant see the MASSIVE crowd the band has, he feels like he can let loose and stuff

he probably has had his fingers start bleeding during a live but didnt notice until Silver started freaking out

has probably broke down and cried on stage once but everyone comforted him and he finished the show EPICALLY

always makes sure that the crowd is staying safe. probably did that one thing that Andy Biersack did when he jumped into the crowd to personally fight this one guy

oh yeah he will also get pissed if you diss the band at their show or if you're just being an asshole and will deal with you personally

will beat you up if you assault someone in the pit

WALL OF DEATH WALL OF DEATH WALL OF DEATH

definitely a perfectionist and probably studied classical music theory. definitely a JS Bach fan and played the piano once

comes up with lyrics and melody line

mini list of songs he would do amazing on:

Mobius by HiiragiKirai cover by Meychan

The Show Must Go On by Queen (HES SUCH A QUEEN FAN ISTG)

Dragula by Rob Zombie

Infected by Bad Religion

Gone Away by The Offspring (he's def thinking abt Maria for this one) gone away lyrics yeah ouch-

Tails: also classic rock fan but he also likes vocaloid!!

"accidentally" G notes the crowd (emos)

*plays a rick roll sample randomly*

during the parts where he doesn't have anything to do he just starts flying and tossing signed photo cards or some kind of merch into the crowd

probably manages some part of their social media as well

literally live tweeting the performance

is the supplier of Sonic's extra guitar pics and sometimes makes custom ones for him that are a bit more grippy? (idk how guitar pics work im a violinist)

honestly the most wholesome person there, everyone loves him, he goes apeshit sometimes but we love him

multi-instrumentalist and sometimes even makes his own instruments!

he plays the Theramin and nobody knows what it is but it sounds cool

makes up tracks on the spot during solos sometimes

CHORDS GO BRR

is the one that does the mixing and stuff for their songs

personal favs he would love:

Jump by Van Halen (everyone likes this song, if you dont then ur wrong /lh)

Kingslayer by BMTH & BABYMETAL

Lost Valley from Sonic Forces (I LOVE THIS SONG SM)

Silver: goth, heavy metal, Ghost specifically

owns a Mikey Fucking Way t-shirt

probably can play the upright bass or cello as well

people from the audience give him gifts and it makes him very happy

also has a lot of stickers on his bass and it's case but the stickers are color coded and organized vs sonics random bullshit GO

i like to think that he wears fingerless gloves

is the one that stops Shadow from jumping into the crowd when someone disses the band

always makes sure that everyone in the band has like a solo area where they can just go wild because he thinks it's more fun that way

probably can do improv on the spot

gets excited when they have an acoustic live show

helps come up with album cover ideas and all of the depth in their album / song lore

Last Train To London by ELO (hes probably a big ELO fan)

Detroit Rock City by KISS (this is my dad's fav so it's mine too)

The Legacy by Black Veil Brides

Knuckles: thrash metal Slayer fan TM

can do the thing where the drumset go upside down

similar to Sonic, he throws his drumsticks bc he loves playing so much so he has a bunch of extra sticks

ties back his hair during recording bc it gets in his face

HEADBANGING WOOOOO

has A BUNCH of song cover suggestions for the band

probably plays the drums randomly while sonic is ranting and sometimes does a duet with tails

sings along to the songs but nobody can hear him bc his drums are too damn loud

accidentally stabbed his snare drum once and started panicking

he definitely gives a name to all of his different drum parts (his favorite is the crash symbol and bass drum)

everyone thinks he was a former band kid but he keeps denying it

sometimes people think the band is using a drum machine but they're not

SONG HCS

Raining Blood by Slayer

1000 Memories by Bad Religion

Eyeless by Slipknot (RIP JOEY JORDINSON I WILL CRY)

You Give Love A Bad Name by Bon Jovi

ok and now for some random headcanons!!

Rouge is the agent or like manager for the group and helps pick out outfits for them and does stage design

ik i put in a lot of classic rock songs in my song headcanons but i feel like the band would be like a Smashing Pumpkins, early BVB, The Offspring and Sum 41 kinda vibe. and ofc MCR and Blink-182

everyone is a fan favorite, but they all dont know how to interact with fans except for Tails and Sonic

Silver and Tails sitting alone in the recording studio in the middle of the night writing a song aaaaa

sonic and shadow doing those song battles

they all play guitar hero, it's the law

they actually freaked out when MCR dropped the new single out of NOWHERE

sometimes their punk songs is just dissing G.U.N.

they have a fanart / fangift wall where they put all of the stuff their fans give them

the tour bus is like sectioned off and everyone decorates their space differently so it looks like 5 different aesthetics in one place

IM SORRY THIS IS SO LONG BUT IM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT THIS I DISREGARDED ALL OF MY HOMEWORK TO WRITE THIS OKAY BYE

#sonic band au #sonic headcanons #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #tails the fox #silver the hedgehog #knuckles the echidna #MY BRAIN GO BRRRR #guitarist sonic #lead singer sonic #guitarist shadow #keyboardist tails #bassist silver #drummer knuckles

[pansyfemme]

Oooh!! Tell me ur new oc ideas! (I Love talking about OCs as someone with an extensive inner world as well)

mmgh theyre not rlly that indepth yet i just have loose ideas tbh. pretty much all my ocs are in the same universe, they live in a small city arts scene lol. I have a few recurring locations, one being a bookstore/coffee shop that has a performence space where bands play that’s basically a combo of like. three real life places i go to a lot in my hometown lol. Basically tho ive been workshopping a few bands that would play this space, and one of them i’m slowly creating members for. This is kind of a weird tangent, but my father is a writer and had a long running blog that was essentially like. a music collumn but all the bands and venues and songs were fictional. He had hundreds of these and he would write them the exact way he writes his actual music collumns. He used to have this theory that small city music scenes were easy to fabricate as long as you had three clubs of different types and enough bands to rotate through each club’s specific genres without the same band playing all the time. And he’s since abandoned that project but ive kinda took over the ‘making fake bands’ thing from him following his rules. I imagine this bookstore cafe place is much less of a club as much as. if you’re friends with the owner you can play there, but it does have a specific vibe to it. The band ive been populating aren’t very good in my vision. theyre indie, but claiming to be punker than they are. A bit rough around the edges, maybe- but they can barely hold onto a bassist for more than a few weeks. Theres neil, (she/he) a stuck up person no one’s really certain of the gender of, but she sucks regardless. He’s super obnoxious about music, works in a record store and will think she’s being a lot funnier than he is when she gets in hour long arguments about what’s the most obscure elephant six band or whatever. He does have a beautiful voice though, honestly haunting. Mostly a guitarist, but was classically trained on violin as a child and will occasionally pull it out for a show if he deems fit. The other consistsnt member i have is Tadhg. (he/him.) I have a very clear vision of him. short, chubby trans man, around 24. natural blonde but bleaches it even lighter to the point it’s dry and frizzy, he cuts it super choppy and uneven. He has some facial hair, but can’t grow much. Lots of facial moles but not really freckles. Dark, round eyes. He’s sweet, if not a little obnoxious himself. He rarely sleeps, has a day job as a barista but isn’t super into it. He’s the drummer, and sings occasionally, his voice is raspy. He’s first gen american, he has a british dad and an irish mother. He has a thing for older men. His recurring boyfriend i haven’t got a solid name for yet but it’s something like eric or carl or something kinda basic lol. He’s a cis gay man, almost forty. Professor type, prob a gender studies one or film or something like that. Writer as well. Taller, going grey. Round glasses. He’s absolutly infatuated with tadhg, likes to spoil him. tadhg is charmed by this, but is a bit more non-commital. They’re sweet together. That’s mostly what i got rn lol

[raccoonspooky]

cocaine bear (2023) in ur inbox with the q's

13, 58, and 64!

HELLO MY DARLING!!!! I cant wait to watch that movie like I refuse to pay for it I have to wait till its yo-ho territory haha 🏴‍☠️ ʕง•ᴥ•ʔง

13. what’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

Chuck Palahniuk and Neil Gaiman have some awesome advice for writers that I hold very near and dear to my heart.

One thing I try to force myself into remembering from Palahniuk is that you go into a scene already knowing the purpose, if you can’t nail down the purpose of a scene its best left out. If it builds on nothing and offers nothing insightful then you should think about how to make such a scene offer something to your writing. Like work scenes in YOUR favor not force scenes into submission by sheer will.

Gaiman also has a great thing about how if nothing in your story is laughable then whats the point and its so important to laugh at your own jokes and that your readers are smarter than you’d otherwise assume. Putting jokes and asides in a story breathes a lot of life into it and it makes it easier and more engaging for people to read. Even in dreary and dark stories, Gaiman always keeps me fkn hooked just by his strong narrative voice and you can so hear HIM in his writing yknow?

58. What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc)

My process is so nonsensical and insane. I rarely have an outline. I also have like 4 notebooks near me and on me at all times for random notes. I guess brainstorming??? on account of my ten million wips?

64. Something you love to see in smut.

I already answered this one in another ask! But imma use this as an excuse to expand. One thing I love is like, yucky vile language lol. If its too explicit for even the smuttiest romance book? Thats my FAV.

Also I like being STRONGLY attached to whatever perspective is there I wanna be stapled into it. Like I dont want any dancing around when it comes to whats happening like tell me abt SCHMEATY MEAT and SLOPPY HOLES hahahahah. I want all the nasty nasty thoughts and feelings. SENSORY DETAILS!!!!!

#Long post #ask game #poki posting #another palahniuk tip I like is this one #Ok tumblr wont let me post it in the tags but its about the three types of speech #and how the balance between all three is what makes ur storu

[george-weasleys-girl]

i'm sorry

do u prefer a standalone or a series? ur fav genre? ur least fav genre? why? a book which had a tv adaption that was better than the book itself? enemies to lovers or friends to lovers? ur fav book trope? ur least fav book trope? the best protagonist u have ever seen in a book and why? if u were stuck on an island and could only have three books w u what would they be? (series would be counted as one cuz as i said so) the worst book u have ever read? the best book u have ever read? a book/book series u wish u could read for the first time ever again? ur fav author( if u have any)? an overrated book? an underrated book? the book that made u fall in love with reading? a book to get u out of a reading slump? a book with a strong female protagonist? a book u came across randomly but ended up loving it? do u prefer audio books or e-books? hardcovers or paperbacks? a book that u hated at first but now love it? a book u used to love but now hate? a book genre u haven't read? why? a book that had u bawling ur eyes out? ur fav quote from a book? a 'fanfiction' trope that u like to see in books? the last book u read? did u like it? do u annotate ur books? give any 3 book recs to ur followers!

Don't be sorry, Kate! I love this sort of thing!

do u prefer a standalone or a series? Series.

ur fav genre? Fantasy

ur least fav genre? why? Westerns, I think. With a few exceptions, they rarely resonate with me.

a book which had a tv adaption that was better than the book itself? Issac Asimov's Foundation

enemies to lovers or friends to lovers? Friends to lovers

ur fav book trope? Bonded/Soulmate/Reincarnation trope

ur least fav book trope? Love triangles, I just feel like they're so overdone

the best protagonist u have ever seen in a book and why? ‐ Alexia Tarabotti in the Parasol Protectorate Series. 1) she's a woman 2) she loves sweets and is not ashamed 3) an all-around badass in corsets and bustles 4) she's born without a soul, yet has the capacity to love deeply

if u were stuck on an island and could only have three books w u what would they be? (series would be counted as one cuz as i said so) - The aforementioned Parasol Protectorate Series, pretty much anything by Neil Gaiman and, I have to go with Oliver Phelps on this one, "How to build a raft."

the worst book u have ever read? - All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque (beautifully written, but that book depressed me for weeks after reading it)

the best book u have ever read? Circe by Madeline Miller

a book/book series u wish u could read for the first time ever again? The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice

ur fav author( if u have any)? - Madeline Miller, Neil Gaiman, Patrick Rothfuss and Gail Carriger

an overrated book? The Great Gatsby

an underrated book? The Winternight Trilogy by Katherine Arden

the book that made u fall in love with reading? - My grandparents used to have this huge book of myths and folktales from around the world. As a kid, I would sit for hours just reading and rereading stories.

a book to get u out of a reading slump? Something fun and lighthearted like Dark, Witch & Creamy by H.Y. Hanna

a book with a strong female protagonist? Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik

a book u came across randomly but ended up loving it? - The Invisible Library Series by Genevieve Cogman

do u prefer audio books or e-books? E-books

hardcovers or paperbacks? Paperbacks

a book that u hated at first but now love it? Johnathon Strange and Mr. Norrell by Susanna Clarke

a book u used to love but now hate? - Hate isn't the right word. Maybe annoy? But most of the Outlander Series beyond Drums of Autumn. Just of endless cycle of Jamie and Claire happily together, then torn apart by some tragic circumstance over and over.

a book genre u haven't read? why? - I don't think there is one. As long as it's a good story, I don't really care about the genre

a book that had u bawling ur eyes out? Where the Red Fern Grows

ur fav quote from a book? - oh goodness, there's so many to choose from...

"The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places.” — Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms

a 'fanfiction' trope that u like to see in books? Crossovers between different fandoms

the last book u read? did u like it? Equal Rites by Terry Pratchett. Loved it!

do u annotate ur books? No, I'm really weird about writing/marking in books.

give any 3 book recs to ur followers!

The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss

Etiquette and Espionage by Gail Carriger

The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman

[mylifeisactuallyamess]

I posted 4,392 times in 2022

371 posts created (8%)

4,021 posts reblogged (92%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@princessxkenobi

@daydreamsofren

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@blondiwankenobi

I tagged 3,126 of my posts in 2022

Only 29% of my posts had no tags

#queue dat - 671 posts

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Longest Tag: 106 characters

#feelin sorry for urself bc ur little game is over and u haven't got the balls to go out and find a new one

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

A/N: Posting and running because I am exhausted! The excitement from the extra episode sent me on a frenzy. I’ve been struggling a lot with myself, imposter syndrome and perfectionism but I am trying everyday to push through it. The interaction I get is really humbling for someone like me and I am so grateful. Also, go watch the new episode, it’s amazing.

Warnings: Do not tag Neil Gaiman in any of my work or he will block me and I do enjoy his page. This fic is an 18+ sloooow burn. I am taking huge artistic license with the world because I am going by the TV series alone. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Tags will be updated per chapter but if you know how the series goes then you know where the tags are heading. This shit is unbeta’d. Reader is femme and I will always be respectful of characters pronouns throughout the fic. If I do slip up please feel free to message me and it shall be corrected.

Pairing: Dream of the Endless/ Morpheus x F!reader/oc insert.

Summary: Brought to life by the power of the Dreaming, you were tasked with a single purpose. Find Lord Morpheus. However, once your purpose is completed will he find it in his heart to keep you around or was your purpose the only reason you were brought into being. Multichapter fuckery.

Prelude

Word Count: 2.2k+

Tagging: @a-bang-for-your-bucky @lu123sworld @leighanne03 (if you’d like to be tagged or taken off just let me know.)

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176 notes - Posted August 19, 2022

#4

Excuse me. I need a moment.

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192 notes - Posted August 24, 2022

#3

Different anon here. I don't know if you're taking requests, but I saw this in the prompt list and immediately thought of Hux

"enemies to lovers kissing for the first time, and it's a tender kiss"

If you aren't taking requests or aren't inspired by the quote, I'll completely understand if you don't write anything

A/N: Sorry this has taken me so long, my writers block has been stupid. And annoying. I hope you like this!

Warnings: fighting, knives, enemies to lovers trope.

Prompt: Enemies to lovers kissing for the first time, and it's a tender kiss.

It was dark, no lights shone on this side of the cantina and you had managed to slip into the room unnoticed. You waited for your eyes to adjust, but the room was pitch black, leaving you to rely on your other senses. Closing your eyes, you let go of the tension and relaxed. You swore you heard the swish of fabric, cocking your head toward the sound and ducking at the last moment.

A blaster bolt slammed loudly into the wall where your head had been moments before, shattering the stillness. But it told you everything you needed to know. You uncoiled your legs, leaping at your attacker and colliding heavily with his body as the two of you went down in a tangle of limbs.

The fight for dominance was fierce and you didn’t hold back, a soft grunt was the only noise he made when you raked your nails down his neck. He managed to get a good left hook against your face, disorienting you with blinding lights and colours and giving him the upper hand he needed to subdue you. After more silent fighting you found yourself slammed into the wall, your head pressed heavily against the cold surface, his hand holding you in place by the neck. His other hand had curled around your wrists behind your back, his knee wedged inelegantly between your legs, his body pinning you in place. You could feel his warm breath heave into your ear and you wiggled against him, but his grip was unshakable.

“Thought you could sneak up on me, assassin.” He whispered, his lips delicately brushing that soft spot just below your ear with each word.

“Anyone would think you’re trying to seduce me,” your words were cut off with a groan as the pressure from his knee increased and your body responded instantly.

“Do you like this? Being helpless?” He asked softly. Your lip curled as you tried to free your hands, but his long fingers were like vices and you could feel your own going numb.

“I hate it…” Oh! You gasped when he tightened his hold on your throat, rocking your body along his thigh and he hummed in amusement.

“Hate it so much you enjoy it?”

“Let me go and I’ll show you what I enjoy.”

“I’m not stupid. Soon as I release you, you’ll try to kill me.” His voice was low and confident.

“Isn’t that the thrill of the job?” He huffed a sigh against your neck, his hand moving to trail firmly down your body. His long fingers left no pocket or seam untouched, dragging out your throwing daggers, each one thudding with precision into the wooden floor. Next he slipped out the hidden blade in your boot, the small blaster out of your other one. He dragged out the twin blasters from their holsters at your hips and unclipped your tool belt, letting it fall with a loud clatter to the floor before kicking it away.

“Have I removed all the stings from my little bee?” He asked silkily as his hand moved from your hip and slid down the curve of your backside.

“There’s only one way to know for sure,” you replied feeling relieved when he finally let go of your hands. You shook them trying to get feeling back into the tips of your fingers, turning so your back was against the wall. It was still pitch black, you could hear the sound of his starchy clothes across the room. Holding your breath and reaching for the single blade you had left on you. One he never would have found in the seam of your leather trousers, it was a last resort and easily reachable if you were ever cuffed with your hands behind your back. Your movements were fluid and swift, leaping toward the sound of his breathing, which expelled in a rush as you slammed into him. You both fell onto the floor, your blade just pressing against his neck and he froze. You legs rested either side of his body, your hips rocked against him slightly as you leaned down to his level.

“You missed one,” you whispered, taking the soft lobe of his ear between your teeth and biting not too gently, eliciting a soft rumble of warning from his chest.

“You underestimated me, again,” he drawled softly. You froze, feeling the prick of his own blade pressing into the softness of your abdomen.

“Seems we’re in a bit of a stalemate,” you breathed.

“How do you propose we break it?” He asked, not able to hide the slight waver in his voice. Leaning lower you saw his eyes widen in the dimness, his chest rose and fell rapidly against your own but he did nothing to stop you. Brushing your nose against his cheek, you could feel his rapid breath tickle the side of your face, his blade eased away from your body, his arm laid out on the floor and you pressed your advantage.

His lips were softer than they looked and at first they didn’t move. Stunned to stillness by your bold move and you expected him to push you away. Shove you off or threaten to stab you again, but he seemed frozen. Your lips curled in amusement, gently brushing against his mouth again in an effort to get him to join in. Teasing him, stealing his breath and returning it with pillowy softness, making him relax beneath you. Lulling him into a false sense of security as you distracted him, your free hand walking across the floor.

You were surprised when he responded, a soft sigh expelling from him as he pressed his mouth harder against your own. You ran your tongue along his bottom lip and you shivered when he allowed you access. Licking into the heat of his mouth, not able to stop the moan that erupted from your chest at the feel of him. Your life was a lonely one, constantly on the run, hiding in the shadows and dealing with the scum of the Galaxy. Maybe….maybe you’d keep this one alive.

Moving swiftly you ripped the blade from his loose grasp. Breaking the kiss and sitting up with a gasp, both blades now pressing into the sides of his neck. His curled fist slammed into the floor in frustration, hatred glinting in his eyes but you weren’t sure if it was for you or because he’d fallen for your cheap trick.

“Got anything to make a deal, General? Or can I contact Pryde and receive my payment?”

“I’m sure we could come to an arrangement.”

“Oh, I’m sure we could,” you purred. An arrangement you were determined to satisfy you both.

202 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

#2

I see us all.

239 notes - Posted March 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

“I am the King of Dreams.” - Has a nice soft feel to it.

“I am the Ruler of the Nightmare Realms.” - That’s a threat wrapped up in a title. Come on the wrong side of me bitch and I’ll set my nightmares on you. You’ll be begging for me to take them away and wishing you’d never been born. So come on. Try me.

431 notes - Posted August 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[carajanne]

hey guys, i’m just rereading aftg and was wondering if y’all could give ur explanations and interpretations for andrews reaction. why did andrews expression go dark and distant when neil respected his boundaries ? i can’t figure it out.

[windenbluffs]

OMG ur a comics collector? that's so cool! what are ur faves/good ones for beginners (a friend has been trying to get me to read daredevil but idk anything about comics)

Ooh I've never read Daredevil - or anything Marvel, really - but I want to start since lots of people I know love the show haha

I mostly collect DC comics (usually the Batfam with a few exceptions) and, in my opinion, some good ones to start are:

Batman: The Court of Owls by Scott Snyder (My personal top reco for new batman readers! Quite dark. Gritty. Doesn't waste time with origin stories which can be a bit contrived and samey imo.)

Batman: Hush by Jeph Loeb (I personally am a bit tired of stories about Batman's early years, so I liked this since B is already more established in Gotham. Warning: Jason Todd's appearance and characterisation suckssss asssss in this one so beware!)

The Sandman by Neil Gaiman (I started reading this a couple years ago and it was my intro to DC comics! The new Netflix show covers the first two volumes. This is an all-time fav of mine so definitely highly highly recommend.)

I'm no expert but those are some that I've enjoyed!

(also while I'm thinking about it, here are my top tips)

Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman are the most famous DC heroes but there's a whole catalogue of others - you might want to read one of the team-up comics (Titans, Teen Titans, Justice League, etc) to see if you find a new fav.

The comics industry is over a hundred years old. You'll come across stories and interpretations you don't agree with, both in canon and fanon. It is what it is; don't let other people take away your own personal enjoyment.

There is no 'perfect beginner comic' and even arcs written as jumping-on points for newbies (like Court of Owls) still have to appeal to old readers. You might get confused at times but push through! If you have no clue who certain characters are, there's lots of resources online that can help explain backstories and relationships.

... ok this reply ended up being a lot longer than I intended! I'm done geeking out, now back to your regularly scheduled Sims 4 content xoxo

#batman the long halloween and dark victory are pretty good too #but those are some pretty basic recos that everyone talks about #dont get me started about comics because i will talk for HOURS #also i have already binged and FINISHED the sandman on netflix!! i finished it in 24 hrs lmAO #it was amazing #windenbluffs #replies #anon #scarlett's life #non sims

[midamrevenant]

tagged by @tuometarr whom i am kissing on the mouth <3

20 Questions for Writers

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 34

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 167,597

3. What fandoms do you write for? Whatever u know lol. like whatever catches my interest at the moment

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Present Time, Todd Anderson ; Nothing but Immortality ; Spurious Hatred and Something Like Affection ; #ToddandNeil'swedding2ksomething ; Love Speaks at Midnight

5. Do you respond to comments? Sometimes! If I feel like I have something to say. but I always love to get them!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? damb....maybe Nothing but Immortality since I stuck with the canon that Neil dies, but the 5th chapter also goes back in time a little bit. Also Called Collisions and Kill Team Free Will are pretty dark but not necessarily for the main characters so

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Rainbow Diffraction Spike, Love Speaks at Midnight, and Vanilla Blue are all sweetness!

8. Do you get hate on fics? nope

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? every now and then. not really a 'kind' about it--for me it's always about exploring how i think these characters would have sex

10. Do you write crossovers? i don't think i've ever written a straight up crossover? definitely taken heavy inspiration from a different source material however

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? maybe lol? someone asked me on ff.net ages ago if they could translate one of my fics--not sure whether or not they ever actually did it

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? not in as many words, but a friend of mine had a very heavy hand in inspiring Pushing Platonic and Dogs on the Bed

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? i don't know lol! i think the ship i've shipped the longest that i'll still go to bat for is hardenshipping

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? i have scattered WIPs across my laptop and phone--none of them stick out in particular

16. What are your writing strengths? i'm just very good with words in written form all around--they just make sense to me

17. What are your writing weaknesses? probably making really tied together, cohesive, plot-driven stories. do i need to do that? no. am i just one bitch? yes. however, always like WOWWWWW when i see a story tie itself the fuck together (shout outs to my time at sandrock (the video game) and lisa frankenstein as of late)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? pops, love it, not a total necessity. but also, if you do this make sure you know it lol. i only feel comfortable enough to do this in french.

19. First fandom you wrote for? *my longest deep sigh ever* h*talia

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? i can't pick! i did a really great job on present time todd anderson--ppl kudosing it ur right!--, just tied it all really nicely together and told it perfectly in a way i didn't fully even realize i was doing at 18; Undo Dawn is my fav like longform fic I've done and I think I brought some really interesting angles to it; and you know what? I really like my most recent story I Think We Might Be Fucked Up Soulmates too--i think i got those girls down to a T!

i don't have a tonnnn of writing mutuals--if you wanna do this go ahead!

[viktorfredriksson]

»Heat« (1995) – Michael Manns odödliga mästerverk

Michael Mann är, något oväntat, högaktuell igen. Han regisserade pilotavsnittet (seriens i särklass bästa avsnitt för övrigt) till HBO Max’ prestigeserie »Tokyo Vice«, han är mitt uppe i produktion av »Ferrari« (en biografi om Enzo Ferrari spelad av Adam Driver med premiär 2023) – och i augusti i år släpptes »Heat 2«, en skönlitterär uppföljare till Michael Manns stilbildande 90-talsklassiker. Boken beskrivs som både en föregångare och uppföljare till filmen, och det är sannolikt bara en tidsfråga innan vi ser den på vita duken. Låt oss därför blicka tillbaka till Manns hittills främsta stund som regissör.

Manuset till »Heat« bygger på den verkliga historien om Chicago-polisen Chuck Adamson som spårade upp brottslingen Neil McCauley på 60-talet. Handlingen är allt annat än originell: Yrkesbrottslingen Neil McCauley (Robert De Niro) ska göra sin sista stora stöt innan han drar sig tillbaka och börjar leva som en laglydig medborgare. Hans motståndare är den (alltför) hängivne LAPD-kriminalpolisen Vincent Hannah (Al Pacino), med två äktenskap bakom sig och det tredje på gränsen till upplösning.

Filmen öppnar med ett oerhört välregisserat värdetransportrån (parallellerna till Nolans »The Dark Knight« är uppenbara), och till ytan må »Heat« vara en heistfilm, men ganska fort förstår man att filmen är mycket mer än så. Val Kilmer, Ashley Judd, Jon Voight, Natalie Portman, Tom Sizemore och Diane Venora står alla för minnesvärda rolltolkningar, men »Heat« är troligtvis mest känd för en sak: återföreningen av Robert De Niro och Al Pacino på vita duken (de var tidigare båda med i »The Godfather 2« utan att dela några scener ihop). Och kärnan i berättelsen är onekligen dessa två giganters rollfigurer. Till lynnet är de varandras motsatser; McCauley är den återhållsamma och mystiska, hans lågmälda pondus är påträngande, man nickar tyst i samförstånd till allt han säger. Hanna å andra sidan är utåtagerande, explosiv – en tickande bomb – redo att när som helst explodera. 

Men i grund och botten är Neil McCauley och Vincent Hanna två sidor av samma mynt. De är båda intelligenta och skickliga på vad de gör, åtminstone på jobbet. För de mänskliga relationerna försakas. I Hannas fall sker det ofrivilligt och oundvikligt, för McCauley som ett vägledande mantra: »Do not have anything in your life that you cannot walk away out on within thirty seconds if you feel the heat coming around the corner.«

Deras målmedvetenhet och yrkesmässiga skicklighet gör dem båda ensamma, men ensamheten har manifesterats och kanaliserats på olika sätt. Här i ligger den underliggande dragningskraften, och för den delen melankolin: i ett annat universum vore Hanna och McCauley bästa vänner. Omständigheter råkar ha placerat dem på olika sidor av lagen. Såväl De Niro och Pacino som Michael Mann gör ett oerhört bra jobb i att bygga denna dynamik. 

Los Angeles – med sin ytlighet, sitt intrikata nät av motorvägar, och sina löften om oändliga möjligheter – är den perfekta platsen för skildringen av ensamhet. Samtidigt vilar det ett drömskt och romantiskt skimmer över staden. Stilistiskt skickliga Mann skapar sitt alldeles egna universum. Valet av objektiv med längre brännvidd (så kallat teleobjektiv) skapar två huvudsakliga effekter: dels av intimitet (extrema närbilder på karaktärerna), dels en känsla av övervakning (i avståndsbilder förstärks distansen till karaktärerna) – en dubbelhet helt i linje med filmens tematik, där karaktärerna i sig är varma, men avskärmade från sin omgivning.

Filmens avslutande timme är närmast perfekt. Hanna och McCauleys första faktiska fysiska möte – caféscenen – tillhör filmhistoriens mest mytologiserade. Men scenen bör såklart inte reduceras till cineastisk trivia. Sedan följer den nästan lika berömda skjutningsscenen. I bakhåll av polisen, efter ett bankrån i downtown L.A. mitt på ljusa dagen, beslutar sig McCauleys gäng för att skjuta sig ur situationen. Det låter som taget ur vilken dålig actionrökare som helst, men genomförandet är fenomenalt. Minutiösa förberedelser (samtliga inblandade erbjöds flera veckors taktik- och vapenträning av exmilitär) och ett hyperrealistiskt anspråk (användningen av handhållna kameror och autentiskt skottljud) transformerar scenen till en välkoreograferad, öronbedövande och skräckinjagande dans.

Men oftast gör »Heat« inget större väsen av sig. Filmens stilla tyngd står i kontrast till den postmodernism som genomsyrar flera av 90-talets stilbildare. Här saknas självreflexivitet, populärkulturella referenser och lekfulla narrativ; tvärtom levererar »Heat« en rakt och konventionellt berättad historia, med kraft, stil, hjärta och elegans. Slutscenen knäcker mig varje gång: den intensiva korsklippningen, de glittrande ljusen, det bullrande ljudet från flygplanen, drömmen om att fly. Så nära men ändå så avlägset. När de hypnotiska tonerna till Mobys »God Moving Over The Face Of The Waters« sänker sig över eftertexterna sitter jag alltid lika mållös.

[jujywrites]

1, 5 and 6 for RosaWatts? OuO

ohoho, naughty naughty~ bet u thought i forgot about this BZZT WRONG!!

i couldn’t figure how to make a coherent fic out of all of them at once but blease enjoy this grab bag of spice drabbles uh no actually, the first one was long and the next one’s heading the same direction SO! ur gonna get tagged 3 times and that’s only on tumblr im so sorry~~

(prompts from this list)

Body Press (prompt: 1, against the wall. set in my A Simple Favor AU)

They were there to “keep up appearances” (yes, always withthe air quotes and an eye roll whenever Eva said it), to snag an angel investoror two while they were at it, and hey, if either of them happened to findsomeone who was interested in a quickie in one of the million and a halfbedrooms infesting this mansion, so be it.

Keeping up appearances was easy; Neil only had to hover hishand over the small of Eva’s back once in a while. Eva only had to make eyes athim occasionally. Sometimes they swapped drinks. (He’d dug his wedding ring outof its box from its dusty corner of the bathroom drawer, just for thisoccasion. Where was Eva keeping hers?)

Eva’s built-in competitive streak, powered up by animositytoward him, gave her an advantage; halfway through the evening she’d gotten twochecks from two investors while Neil only had one.

But his was bigger. Ha.

He was attempting, now, to make small talk with a woman whoclaimed to be the assistant to some bigwig who would definitely, probably, openquite a few doors financially. Truth be told, though, his heart wasn’t in it.And then his heart went somewhere else entirely when he saw Eva slinking aroundhis periphery wearing a murderous gaze.

Bingo.

“I’ll be back before you can say  ‘what’,” he told the redhead.

“What?” she said, tittering.

He gave her a wink and strode for the hallway Eva had justdisappeared down.

“Okay,” he said when he found her, tilting the last of herthird drink into her mouth, “what the hell’s your problem?” He found himself influencedby the dim light into speaking quietly (if not less harshly), though no oneelse was around to hear him.

“I don’t have a problem,” she said coolly. “Seems like youdo.” Her face was a mask again, no trace of the daggers she’d been shootingminutes ago. “Sweet talking any piece of ass who can get you to the guy withthe keys to the kingdom. Supposedly.”

With a measured sigh, he followed as she sauntered down thehall looking around, glass lightly held; a planet following its sun. “We agreedbefore we came here! Do whatever we had to do, all bets are off, blah blahblah. Excuse me if I find certain people more interesting than others.”

“Sure, but I’m only human. Never said I’d be okay with itwhen it actually happened.”

He knew she was only trying to get a rise out of him.

It was working.

“Oh,” he said with a harsh laugh, “you are such a hypocrite.You assured me you were fine with it. And meanwhile I’m supposed to bea-okay with you smarming your way into some rich’s asshole’s pants.”

She paused near a bookshelf, sliding the empty glass ontoit. Then she turned to him. “I have better things to do than monitor yourfeelings about… all this.” She pointedly adjusted her tight, low-cut dress, aserpentine smile curving her mouth. “Just figured by this point yourself-control would be higher than a 14-year-old.”

Before he’d breathed he grabbed her by the wrists and backedher into the wall. He looked up at her wide eyes (damn her stilettos) and said,growling, “Fuck you.”

She met his stare, breathing calm where his was rough. Evenin the half-darkness, he could see her pupils expand.

One of her hands slipped away from his grip to cradle hisjaw, to slide to his chin, fingernails just barely digging in. “Oh, Neil,” shesaid, with that false tenderness that after all this time still went straightto his groin, “sometimes you’re so easy.”

He pressed her other hand harder against the wall and sealedhis lips to hers.

She moaned, opening her mouth to his tongue. One leg hookedaround his waist and pressed his body to hers; she rolled her hips, moaningagain. “Tell me what I want,” she said when they broke free.

“You want to get fucked right here.” He was already undoinghis fly, watching her hike up her dress. “You want to know you’re still mine.”

She laughed throatily, spreading her bare legs. “Please,baby. I want you to know you’re still mine.”

Christ, she hadn’t wore panties. “God, Eva,” and he groaned,biting her shoulder as he slid into her, so wet, “you’re such a sl—”

“Shut up and get me off.”

He felt her fingers working her clit, her thumb brushing hisdick as he moved fast and hard; one leg was around him again and she stillstood as firm as a pillar against that wall.

Neil wanted her knees to crumple. Wanted Eva to get loudenough that everyone would know. “You’re so fucking wet. How long have youbeen—nngh, fuck—thinking about this?”

“I went commando. How long do you think?” A bitten-off yelp,and she flexed around him. “Knew I‘d get you in me sometime tonight, justdidn’t know, oh, fuck, harder…!”

He moaned helplessly into her neck, dick throbbing as shecame jerkily. “So needy,” he gasped.

“Fuck yeah, give me another. Don’t stop!”

Instead he slowed, laughing as her nails dug into his hip.“I have the self-control of a 14-year-old, remember?” he said, reaching betweenthem to rub her clit. He shifted his angle, drawing out achingly slow andinching back in. Then he groaned, leaning up to kiss her again and tangle histongue with hers.

When he sped up again, feeling her heat grow, he muffled herscream with his lips.

He pulled back from her to breathe, the pressure and the pleasurewonderfully too much. “You’re a witch,” he grunted, pushing deep. “You’re evil.And, and you’re mine, fucking all mine.”

She whined as he came in her, grinding hip to hipagainst him until she came again, squeezing aftershocks out of him. “That’s right,”she said, panting. “Only you can do this to me.”

Maybe it was another lie, but he couldn’t care less. He slidout of her and tidied up, tamping down prickles of annoyance at how lithely Evaremoved herself from the wall he’d just railed her on.

“I should have worn panties after all,” she said, soundingvaguely put out. Would’ve been fun to walk around all filled up.”

“Eva, I swear to fuck you’re trying to kill me,” he said,his groan half tortured and half turned on.

“You should really do something about those nasty delusionsof yours, baby.” She gave a feral grin, then disappeared around the corner forthe bathroom.

When they returned home that night, this time she didn’ttake off her ring.

And like in so many things, he followed her lead.

#Rosawatts #JujYwrites #To The Moon #Finding Paradise #spice #kikithedeceiver

[nbnezumi]

would love to be able to edit music so i can make my dream come true of an eye of the tiger song without any tigers in it

#i dont know how the real one goes but im looking for basically the opposite of neil cicierega’s tiger song #dark neil if ur out there... #ghostie