#dai's mega man dump

[godslush]

Some no-pencil fountain pen drawings from work (between overseeing the floors being cleaned/waxed, and the associated fumes).

Drawing in ink with no sketch is a great exercise, but freshly re-inked fountain pen is... unforgiving, haha.

#art #fanart #mega man #megaman #rockman #mega man 2 #mega man 3 #crash man #magnet man #elec man #dai's mega man dump #work doodles

[condraws]

drop stuff! it’s getting heavy

hannah belong’s to @cino-checker !

#oc tag #ram #others ocs #[dumps my ship art and looks away like it isn't most of the pile] #SO SIX IS DEAD #CRIES WEEPS WAILS #and MAC'S INFECTED #AND #LORNE'S INFECTED #AND RAM'S INFECTED #and hannah's.... MEGA infected. spore mother. special man #we're all fucked within 2-5 business days #anything with short hair ramis ttime travel stuff #can you track when the art was made by how many scars ram has? I CAN #more? less? it doens't matter #it's all just the passage of time #we have scar healing nanobots? aha not me #drop

[pedge-page]

Live a Little, Give a Little ... More [Part 2]

Joel Miller x F!Reader

Live a Little Give a Little part 1

Summary: you've got one last stunt in you before you retire to have your baby--will your mystery Baby Daddy make a final appearance?

Warnings: Breeding kink, pregnancy, exhibition, groping, public sex, public teasing, dub con, manhandling, rape-esc situation that may be triggering, unprotected sex, creampie.

18+ ONLY

- - - -

You keep waving to your camera even after it clicks off and stops recording. Leaning back in your streaming chair, you close your eyes. 

Well, you did exactly what you set out to do: gained a shit ton of views and earned a mega bonus from your subscribers, rating shooting up thanks to that little stunt you pulled a few months ago.

You peer down, drumming your fingers along the hefty bump that had grown in your belly since then. “Hope you’re a bit more responsible than me, kiddo,” you mumble, smiling softly as you stroke over with gentle fingers.

Getting pregnant was not exactly how you imagined achieving that feat.

In all honesty, the plan was never to fuck a stranger on a crowded train. You were on the pill, but STD and STIs were a thing, so the furthest you had genuinely planned with a few hand jobs and being groped by perverts. 

But the second you felt that man on you, felt his cock pulse in your legs, something else over took you. Your whole bodies shivers with excitement every time recalling that day. Trying to etch every single detail into your memory. His callused hands, the firm, broad chest and shoulders that easily could overpower you, his warm thick fingers dancing along your skin, the trace of his breath along the shell of your ear, each beautiful little grunt and groan echoing in your ear like a broken record. 

His massive fucking hung horse cock.

You’ve been fucked by big-dicked guys before. But to know how to use it so fucking well that you don’t need to be battered to a pulp just to feel it, is something that no man can compare to your handsome baby Daddy.

Slickness pools in your panties. At some point, your belly is going to be big enough that you won’t be able to touch yourself. But for now, as your hand dips into your underwear and gathers your arousal, you think about him. 

If he was here now, would he make you cum on his fingers before you could have his cock buried to the hilt in you? Tell you that you’re a naughty girl, so fertile and sweet for the taking? A cum hungry dumb slut who doesn’t know how to function without his seed filling her up at every conceivable moment. Make you watch yourself in the mirror cum like a whore from his touch as he promises to breed and brand you over and over again for the world to see. You bite your lips, feeling him hot on your skin, balls twitching with each pulse of his seed dumping safely into your waiting womb to take him.

The thoughts of the faceless, nameless man who impregnated you on a crowded train during rush hour brings you to orgasm much quicker than any toy or method you’ve tested. Your jaw drops in a silent scream, a slight grin tugging on your lips as you rub your pussy through her little quakes, desperate to feel complete again.

You come down from your high, sticky fingers tracing along your belly as you drift into your current situation, ironically brought on by your insatiable horny lust.

No, you didn’t intend to have sex with a stranger that day. And when you weighed the odds in the nano-second before he impaled you… I mean, even if you got an infection, so what, just this once? What OnlyFans streamer didn’t have a disease or two? (No, please don’t take that advice)

You got tested immediately afterwards, and thankfully everything else came back negative from your fun encounter.

It only took a few more weeks after that of peculiar symptoms to get tested for something else that, to you genuine surprise, was positive. 

The man must have super sperm to have blown past your supposedly unstoppable birth control, which hadn’t even failed you when you did that 5 creampie amateur gang bang porno last summer.  Maybe you were only an hour late in taking your dosage on time that one day, too drunk and more concerned about fingering him cum back into you, but still…

You went into shock for a solid week, not sure what to do. Sometimes even now you feel a little jolt in your tummy, and see your body changing, and it just keeps dawning on you that you’re actually about to have a whole ass child.

And you don’t know the father.

It’s both thrilling and horrifying shook up in a bottle of hormones and currently sitting on the edge of a cliff. You should scold yourself for how stupid you were, if only you actually regretted it.  Even if you’re about to be a single mother who cant explain a thing to your soon to be child about their daddy, you knew you were gonna love you baby. No doubts.

Besides, when you were more financially stable, you DID plan to have kids at some point. So what if it’s a little sooner than expected? Life is full of unexpected surprises! 

You decided after the baby is born, no more streaming. You were gonna get a more stable, (more cloth required) job and raise your precious kiddo on your own.

But a few teasing streams until then, just to milk those breeding, misogynistic, baby bump hungry men out there willing to throw money at you if you rubbed milk over your belly, would be worth those extra bucks before calling it quits altogether.

Still, it would be nice feel him just one more time…

-

Joel’s been watching your stream obsessively since that day you brazenly showed your pregnant belly to the world. He’s got notifications going off on his phone every time you upload something. 

Even with his cock in his hand, most of the time you just talk to your followers, answer their questions about your pregnancy so far, and about that day.

He sees the way your eyes glint, the corner of your lips curving into an unashamed smile as you retell details about him.

Sure, all the lonely fucks in the chat spam your inbox “that’s so hot”, “god I wish that were me,” “can I use your holes and breed you next? My bus departs in 30 mins ;)”

Honestly, who’s to say you aren’t pulling a total bluff? You’re a porn streamer; it’s your job to feed into men like his fantasies. Maybe you had fucked a dozen guys on the train that day, got pregnant from one of them, and only uploaded Joel’s session because it was the hottest? Maybe you were already pregnant, and you’re just spinning a scandalous story for your followers to hold on to? And who’s to say you don’t already have a cuck boyfriend or husband, who could have been filming or watching you two on the train that day from a different angle?

The thought of you belonging to another man, of the baby you “claim” to his being another’s makes his hand grip his cock tightly, teeth grinding down on one another while staring at your beautiful eyes and smile through the computer screen.

He drops a pool of spit on to his tip before sheathing it over with his hand, lubing his cock. You would usually end the stream with some tease:

“God, my breasts are just getting so sore,” you groan dramatically. You unbutton your blouse and reveal your naked cleavage. “Don’t even have any more bras because they’re getting so damn heavy!” You cup them and moan into the camera, relieving the ache while pinching your nipples. 

Joel licks his lips. He had gotten to know you (or the version of you on your stream) a lot more intimately thanks to discovering your blog. He spent hours studying every detail that he missed. Its one thing to have dumped his load into your exquisite pussy, but to be able to see your face, hear your unashamed moans, ogle your gorgeous breasts and body that he had been denied that day makes him yearn to have you one more time.

Your belly had grown just as quickly, drooping over your pelvis just a bit more than before. You’re not at full mast yet. He watches how you maneuver, maybe a little slower or more bulky than before. It fills him with pride, seeing how much you’re having to struggle with his child growing in you. At the very least, you can still reach to get a bulbous pink dildo in your cunt and flash the camera as you masturbate, crying out as you beg Daddy to breed you again.

Joel cups his balls with one hand while the other furiously works over his shaft. His stomach tenses, building towards his release with eyes transfixed on the way that little cunt still has enough room to fit that toy. He would know, you took him with very little prep. 

“That’s it baby, come on, Come for Daddy,” he groans.  Doesn’t care that he’s jerking off in a dark room by himself to a brightly lit screen of his baby momma that doesn’t even know him. Yet. 

You moan directly into the camera, mouth agape as you thrust the dildo in and out, hitting that sweet spot that has your eyes rolling. You spread your legs over the chair, and the skin strewn across your belly tightens as a gush of liquid squirts out of your pussy.

“Fuck Daddy, making my pussy squirt so fuckin good! M so full my cunt can’t hold all my naughty juices, too full with your cock and your cum and your baby!!”

Haggard groans rumble in his throat as his cock erupts into jets of white ribbons, shooting along the computer screen and covering your face as you smile and lick the dildo clean. He milks his sack of the last little spurts of cum before sighing and leaning back against the chair, dreaming about painting your womb white again with his next load. 

When you come down from your high, and the last of the generous tips come flowing in, you usually rub along your swollen tummy. Sometimes it’s subconscious, like you’re comforting your child, other times it’s for the show, twirling around and pushing it out to show everyone how big you’ve gotten. Your voice centers him back to reality.

“And before I forget, I have one final announcement: After our little baby is born, I will be retiring.” You smile softly, but there’s a sense of gratitude mixed with sadness. “I know! It’s been such a great journey, and I’ve never felt soooo good about something as amazing as this, and to share it all with you is more than I could have ever hoped. So as a final send off, I’m doing one last exhibition piece.”

Joel leans, ignoring the stain of his cum drying along his shirt and smudged into his laptop.

 “If you’re out there, Daddio, I want to meet you. Catch me in the same area, around the same time—and no I’m not going to tell you all exactly where on here!  If you’re there, you’ll know—and if not, I will be streaming the whole thing live this time so don’t miss out! Even if I can’t find my blessing baby daddy, I will certainly still be putting on a show for however many lucky bastards get to grope a pregnant, single slut like me!”

-

You stand along the train platform, anxiously glancing over your shoulder at the random passersby just trying to catch a commute. Some men have definitely eyed you in less than innocent ways already. It’s a cest pool of perverts today. 

You contemplate the biggest hiccup in your plan: You know the only chance you have to recognize him is from feeling his huge dick splitting you open again. Cinderella slipper style, if you will. You didn’t have a name, an address, any identifiable features—you wouldn’t even be able to recognize his face if it were right in front of you given that you never really saw more than a blurred partial reflection of it in the first place. That monster cock is the only thing that you’re betting your life on right now to find him.

But for the safety of your baby—you had 0 plans to fuck anybody today. And I mean it this time.

The wind from the train tunnels keeps riling up your frilly dress, the fabric now fitting a little more snug than it did before thanks to your baby on the way. There’s a sense of excitement mixed with disappointment steaming in your flip flops. No, you had no hope of actually finding him again. 

 But who’s to say you can’t still have a little fun, touch some dicks, get your tits squeezed and call it a successful career?

Rush hour got a bit crazy, and boy were the men just as in a hurry. You bit your lip and smiled at a man who brushed by you, his hand happily squeezing your little ass cheek through your dress. He seemed young, thin, definitely not your man, but his long fingers did feel nice, caressing your hips as he grinned to you as well. Swaying your chest in front of him, he peers over your cleavage. The two of you waited along the platform, the crowd shifting awkwardly around you waiting for the train. You twiddled your hair, angling your phone up so it could capture his hand gently caressing your lower belly. 

His eyes widen in surprise: your bump wasn’t entirely obvious under the skirt of the dress, still small enough to be concealed under baggy clothing but very obvious the moment you feel it or pull the fabric tight. You giggle as he eagerly stroked over your belly, and you can barely see the twinkle of a fantasy forming behind those eyes.

The train followed forward a little too soon, and the man got on without another glance at you. Probably his wedding ring might have had something to do with it, but no matter. You remained where you were.

When the cart rushed past again, the wind blowing your dress, you caught the eye of a group of two behind you. You winked at them, lifting your skirt scandalously to show off your bare ass and wiggle at them, before enticing them to follow you behind the stairwell. 

You propped your phone up quickly, conveniently cutting off from the neck up to disguise their faces before they too rounded the corner. One was a bit shorter, dark haired, maybe around 40s with a full beard. His hands were all wrong, not your guy, but you didn’t deter him as he stroked along your cheek and down your cleavage, pulling the fabric of the dress tight to see your swollen tits. 

The other man, tall and muscular under that tight shirt, blond and younger, pressed firmly along your back, the outline of his cock making you rub your ass along his crotch. You quickly reached behind you and stroked his stiff bulge while they pinched your nipple through your dress, held the weight of your pregnant belly and brushed their knuckles along your inner thigh. 

Their faces didn’t matter. Maybe they were your fans, maybe they were just some lucky pervs at the right place at the right time. Either of them could be your mystery man, while neither could be too. You try to brush off your disappointment with a flirty laugh, stroking both of them through their trousers as they breathed in your perfume and continued to touch your body. No, their cocks were all wrong. It didn’t feel this rigid or this plump, his tip was more bulbous than this, and the curvature is in the opposite direction.

You glanced at your camera, making sure you’re getting good angles of your pronounced body sandwiched between these two creeps. They didn’t say much, thankfully, and you didn’t care to talk. Your feed was blowing up, with them none the wiser at behind recorded.  It’s not until you peep again at the screen that you see a third man entering the frame behind you. 

The other guys shift uncomfortably at his intrusion, but you look up at lucky perv number three. You don’t bat an eye when he boldly put his hand between your thighs and slid up along your skin, thick digits grazing your wet folds. You hum contently. Oh, he’s here for the cake. You try not to go hazy, eying the cheeky bastard while being stimulated all over.

 His height was between the other two but that didn’t make him any less imposing. Broad around the shoulders with a bit of a soft tummy, but his denim shirt hugged those biceps so well. And he’s older too, much older due to the wrinkles under his brown eyes and the grays starting to take over in his curled hair and patchy beard—

Your brows furrow for a second, not enough time to process your thoughts before he’s shoving the other two men aside despite their protests and walking you back against the tiled wall, your bum resting on the metal bar there. His torso parts your legs perfectly, and you gasp, hands gripping his shoulders to keep your balance. He only grins, something very knowing behind that look, a secret you feel left out from, and you’re about to call it all off until he rolls that massive THANG between his legs against your uncovered core.

You moan out in surprise, your head falls forward on his chest. He growls something out to the other guys, who end up scurrying away with their palms pressed on their crotches like scared dogs. 

“L-Look, mister,” you say, and fuck you should be trying to fight this harder. Especially with the jangle of his belt coming undone between you. You don’t want some stranger fucking you—again—that defeats the whole purpose of the tease! You could still shout for help, there’s plenty of other people just around the corner if he tries anything funny. And your baby, your health, your safety— “I don’t —I’m not in the mood for anything—penetrative. But I could satisfy you in other ways,” you huff, dragging your lower lip between your teeth.

He smirks again. His breath is warm, so close to your face you could almost kiss him. He feels so strong yet so soft, holding you securely against him, his hand cradling your belly while his tented cock pressed along your clit. Your hearts racing, beating wildly that you don’t doubt he can’t feel it against his own. Maybe he’s considering it, something willing yet still satisfying. You feel drunk off him despite only sampling the scent of him, not the taste quite yet.

He holds your gaze with his curved nose honing yours. Its intimate.

Familiar.

You should protest at least a little when he flips you around and bends you over. He’s got one hand protectively over your belly, making sure you don’t fall into the wall. You glance up, and the sight of your body positioned perfectly centered at your camera. Fuck—he knew where the camera was? Was he a fan watching your stream before he came over? Your shocked expression fills the screen as his torso and hips press against your ass, yellow dress flipped over your hips for his private view.

Your mind is reeling, unaware of the thick slap of his length against your folds—that jolts your attention. You know that cock…

He thrusts in all at once.  No voice escapes your parted lips to convey the cross eyed, fantastic, unbelievable, one in a million stretch that you had been missing for months, now filling you up to the brim and suffocating every available micro meter inside of you, and making you whole again. The same stretch, the one that’s making you cum on his cock right now, flooding your senes as arousal electrifies every nerve in your body.

The man behind you only chuckles, still getting the perfect view of your gaping mouth and furled brows reflected on the phone scream. he hisses lowly between his teeth as you continue to clench around his cock with your sweet wet little cunt. It’s like scanning a membership, and your body finally recognizes the owner of the shop. You pant harshly into the bar, walls convulsing over his thick length buried deep to your occupied womb.

The man that had placated your mind, your pussy and womb for the last 6 months, the man who left the best gift you’d ever received, the man right here in the flesh, that you had almost considered a dream were it not for the growing swell of his child in your womb occupying your delirium…

He leans over you, just enough so that only his lips are visible at the top of the screen, his voice ghosting along your ear: “Hi babygirl. Missed you. Looks like you have a little surprise for Daddy.” You feel his bear palms caress your swollen tummy.

Your lips curl into a delirious smile, lashes fluttering in blissful patterns of love as your entire being welcomes this man into the home he’s already carved out of you.

Even your baby nestled small in your womb wiggles excitedly at the recognition of her Daddy.

Neither of you look away from another as he begins thrusting into you, rocking your body back and forth along his member like the toy you’re so good at being.

He was amazing—no, better than before if it’s possible. Impossibly hard, long, thick and throbbing, all shoved up your pussy with desperate ruts, impaling your soaking pussy over and over again. You had to remind yourself, still lost like a love sick puppy in his eyes, that you were still in public, being fucked raw, pregnant, behind the stairwell of a crowded train station during rush hour. Nosy chatter echoed through the tunnel as the two of you humped against one another, partially clothed minus your genitals connected in a haze of passionate fucking. The phone in front of you is only forgotten, and you can only imagine the comments and tips blowing up at the fact that you’d actually found him.

Despite the openness, the vulnerability of your position, it feels far more intimate, just the two of you fucking to your hearts content. You’ll wonder later about the wondering eyes from trains beginning to enter the station and seeing the two of you in the blurred windows , but right now, you’d be ready to take his second bastard child right this second. 

Your handsome hero reaches past you and turns the recording off, flipping the phone down. If he’s going to have you again, really have you, it would be his own little private show. No camera. No show. He abruptly pulls out before spinning you around and nestling himself between your thighs again, his cock aligning to your entrance before sliding right back in. Right where he belongs.

“Oooooh shiiiit. Shit Momma, you’re so good at taking it,” he rasps into your neck. He presses a wet kiss along your throat, each thrust pushing you back but he holds you close and sucks you right into his grasp again. Your open lips hover over one another as he sets his pace again, his tip now kissing your cervix with each kiss of your pregnant belly to his naval.

“It’s mine, isn’t it?” He growls with an edge of desperation. “Tell me it’s mine.” Beads of sweat begin to form along the creases of his forehead, but he didn’t once consider slowing his pace. With the pay your ass jiggles at each slap of skin.

“It’s yours,” you cry. There’s no doubt. your heart screams with joy just as the knot in your stomach snaps. he grips your mouth with his strong hand as your head rolls in ecstasy, wailing out into his flesh with unfiltered moans.

Harsh breaths are forced out of his nose, his lips switching between a snarl and a grin as he nears his end. 

“Inside,” you hum into his ear.

He wasn’t planning on putting it anywhere else. With one final heave, he lifts you off the rail briefly, your weight balncing under his arms and your tiptoes on the ground as he bursts inside of you, painting your walls with his hot cream.

You both breathe in the polluted air. Distant echoes of the rafters rattling in the darkened caves ahead while footsteps rustle down the metal stairs behind the two of you. The breeze of the caverned tunnels cools the sweat along both your bodies. He hasn’t let go, still glued to you, holding you close as if you’d slip away.

You sit upright in his lap, trying to catch your breath. You survey one another, pupils blown wide yet calming. The two of you just giggle as your pants slowly sync together. His rough yet gentle fingertips stroke your cheek before brushing away the strands of messy hair that had covered your beautiful face, and for the first time, he can really get a full look at you in person.

“I’m Joel,” he says sweetly. He brings your knuckles to his lips and presses a gentle and long kiss, never once breaking eye contact with you.

You shake your head and laugh, offering your name to him as well.

Although, at this point, with his cock still impaled deep inside, his baby growing in your womb— its safe to say the two of you are well past such a redundant formality.

-----

Permanent Taglist

@harriedandharassed @lola8888673 @its-nebuleuse @zliteraturehoe @merz-8 @joeldjarin @pascalscoffin @pedroshotwifey @ghostslillady @innerpersonunknown @missladym1981 @mrsoharaxx @survivingandenduring @milla-frenchy @cockykookiee @fairytale07 @daddy-din @pedropascalsbbg @spookyxsam @somehopeatlast @millercontracting @pedrostories @mishala005 @theoraekenslover @animez96 @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @puduvallee @cassiecasluciluce

Series Taglist:

@princesatracionera @mellowcakiesworld @dovesgirl @lixaftermidnight @bitchesuntitled @brittmb115 @sheepdogchick3 @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @lostfleurs @shadowsaz @supernaturalstilinski @batsodapants @pasta-emulsion @pedroisghosties @fairlyang @poeticpascal @amyispxnk @ghostlovesbaguettes @itsokbbygrl @lovehappyloki

#pedro pascal smut #joel miller fan fiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x you #last of us fanfiction #last of us smut #joel miller fic #the last of us fanfiction #tlou smut #tlou fanfiction #tlou fic #the last of us smut #the last of us fic #last of us fic #LALGAL

[auteurdelabre]

STORY MASTERLISTS!

Something to Fight For (COMPLETE)

For readers 18+ only please!

After a disastrous blind date you decide to stay away from the miserable Joel Miller forever. The only problem is your best friend Maria is dating his brother and their construction company has been hired to renovate where you work. In an effort to support your friend, you’re thrust into the unwanted job of babysitting Joel’s young daughter one night. As time goes on you’re not expecting to find a confidant in Joel Miller but when you do, you wonder how you ever survived without him.AU LOU universe with no outbreak. A slow burn slice of life love story with smut.

Please, Mister Miller? (COMPLETE)

for 18+ readers only!

Summary: After being dumped by your longtime college bf, your roommate Sarah Miller invites you to her hometown for the holidays. There you meet her dad and decide you need to know if he’s as good in bed as he looks. (General warnings: Infidelity and unprotected p in v)

Code Broken (COMPLETE)

for 18+ readers only!

"You broke into my house," Joel says moving his gaze from your eyes back down to your mouth as his wide hand grazes his belt buckle. "Moved my shit around. Least you could do is be polite."You only wanted to pull a silly prank on your neighbor, Joel. Who could have seen it ending up like this? [AU where Joel Miller ends up in Jackson City by himself.]

Dare to Surrender (COMPLETE)

for 18+ readers only!

You can’t stand Javier Pena but when Steve Murphy makes an off-hand remark that gets both you and Javier’s competitive sides going, there’s no telling how far you’ll go.

So Much to Lose - ONGOING

For readers 18+ only please!

summary:

Newly settled into Jackson city and forced to go on patrols with the miserable Joel Miller sets off a chain of events and encounters that have you questioning everything, including your own heart. note: Featuring Dark!Joel

SLEEP (COMPLETE)

When you meet Joel Miller beside his blue truck one hot, sweltering day you're not expecting a bloody adventure to await you.

Part 1 / Part 2

A Little Sun (IN PROGRESS)

for 18+ readers only!

As a PA to megastar and mega man-child Dieter Bravo you've had your fair share of headaches. Getting accidentally pregnant with his baby however takes the cake, especially when he offers to pay you to be his surrogate. You just weren't expecting to fall in love with him along the way. (plot prompt inspired by 'Daddy Dieter' by @absurdthirst on Ao3 - read their story, its really wonderful!)

THE BLACKMAILING BABYSITTER CHRONICLES (ONGOING)

You're a babysitter to many of the families in your small town. When the father of one of your charges makes a move you see an opportunity to make enough cash to leave after college graduation.

- Chapter one - Mr. York -

- Chapter two - The Plan is Made -

- Chapter three - Mr. Morales -

- Chapter four - Mr. Miller -

- Chapter five - Mr. Martell -

- Chapter six - Mom's boyfriend -

- Chapter seven - The Finale -

BRAVO! TAKE A BOW Series - ONGOING

Summary: As a struggling actress you’re amazed when you land a role in an indie film you’re dying to be a part of. What you’re not expecting is to develop feelings for your mega famous and often exasperating co-star Dieter Bravo rated 18+

1- Audition

2- Chemistry Read

3- Table Read

4- Rehearsals

5- Lights, Camera, Action!

WINDOW DRESSING - (ONGOING)

Rated 18+

Resolving to achieve professional success within the CIA you embark on a ruthless game of one-upmanship against your work nemesis Dave York, a rivalry that is complicated by your growing attraction to him. [loosely based on The Hating Game] (AU universe - Dave is divorced and still working for CIA)

Chapter 1: Codebook - COMING FEB 14th

Chapter 2: Black Bag Job

Chapter 3: Clandestine Operation

Chapter 4: False Flag

Chapter 5: Raven

Chapter 6: Burned

Chapter 7: Compromised

Chapter 8: Window Dressing

Someone to pass the time with -(ONGOING)

rated: 18+

Feeling guilty about so often being out of town on business you encourage your loving boyfriend to find someone to pass the time with. When he does, you're not expecting for things to get so out of hand. Pairings: Reader x Javi G x Dave York

Part 1 - It's a He

Part 2 -For you, Javi

Part 3 - Meeting Dave

Losing our Minds Together - ONGOING

For readers 18+ only please!

summary:

As an artist by trade it's only natural that you'd agree to give your young neighbor Ellie drawing lessons. You just weren't counting on her stoic father Joel Miller getting under your skin... or becoming your muse. [AU LOU universe with no outbreak. A slow burn slice of life love story with smut, romance and more.]

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Please, Mister Miller?; THE SEQUEL ONGOING

for 18+ readers only!

After a Christmas holiday you won't soon forget, you find yourself unable to move past your time with Joel Miller, your best friends married dad and the man you think you may just be in love with.

Phone Calls with Mister Miller

Dinner with Mister Miller

Talking with Mister Miller

Spring Break with Mister Miller

Long Distance with Mister Miller

Graduation with Mister Miller

Texas with Mister Miller

THOSE WHO CANNOT DO

Summary: Frankie and Santiago have been through a lot during their friendship and have always come out the other side. But when both of them fall for the pretty new schoolteacher (YOU), it pushes them both to their breaking point. for 18+ readers only! pairings: Frankie x f!Reader / Santiagoxf!Reader

Chapter one: Acceleration

Chapter two - coming soon

Chapter three

Chapter four

Chapter five

Chapter six

Chapter Seven

Chapter eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter ten

Daddy Morales - (COMPLETE)

for 18+ Readers only!

Summary: A distraught Frankie drives you home after babysitting. You cheer him up.... and then you keep cheering him up all over town. [General warnings: Infidelity and Daddy kink]

Part 1 - Drive Home

Part 2 - Pit Stop

Part 3 - No More

Part 4 - Too Late

Part 5 - The BBQ

PALPATION (rated 18+)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

AS LONG AS YOU WANT (PG-13)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3 - coming soon

ONE SHOTS

A Secret Kind of Pain [Frankie Morales x f!reader] (rated 18+)

Poker night over at Benny’s tests the amazing burgeoning relationship you have been hiding with Frankie Morales.

Say, Thank You. [Dave York x F!Reader] (Rated 18+)

After driving you home from babysitting his kids, Dave York has a proposition for you that you just can’t refuse.

Joel's Eyes (rated 18+)

based on the prompt by ashleyfilm: I don’t know if you take requests but I love your writing and I’m dying for a slow burn in post outbreak Jackson. Joel and fem reader strangers to friends to eventual lovers. Reader is in love with Joel from the beginning and is like him strong silent type but with a heart of gold. Lots of pinning and then a surprise when it turns out Joel pines for her too and Tommy and Ellie know that he loves her. Maybe some jealousy thrown in before soft dom Joel to sub reader smut. Then a snippet of them together after confession of love so you can hear what other towns folk think about them. Anyway, if you don’t take asks that’s totally cool and I look forward to reading whatever you write! :)

PALPATION (18+)

You need a massage and thankfully a new place opened up a few blocks away… There you’re introduced to the deliciously professional RMTJoel!Miller. He makes you feel good… maybe too good?  (AU - NO OUTBREAK)

FALLING IN LOVE SERIES

How I imagine these characters fall in love. Rated: G

Joel Miller

Javier Peña

#joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #fanfiction #fanfic #joel miller smut #dad joel miller #joel miller #pedro pascal #smut #enemies to lovers #pedro pascal javier #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena smut #javier pena narcos #javier pena #javier peña #javier pena x reader #joel the last of us #frankie morales x you #frankie catfish morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales #francisco catfish morales #francisco morales #dave york fanfiction #dave york smut #dieter bravo smut #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter x reader

[sierrrraaawwwwwcgtcvh]

Small veneer n velvet headcannons

TW: MENTIONS OF SEXUAL HARASSMENT!!

honestly? I feel like he’d definitely be clingy.

he’d be around you every chance he’d get. After shows, he’d immediately come up to you. He’d expect you to shower him with praise of course, it made his day even better.

He’s definitely someone who loves cuddling. He would be both the big spoon and small spoon depending on what mood he’s in.

I feel like he’d also LOVEE kisses. He’d maybe want them from you all of the time. Short and sweet.

he’d want you to do his makeup for him. Go with him to buy clothes.. maybe even buy matching yachts or cars!

Veneer doesn’t stand up for himself. HOWEVER, if it’s for you? He’ll stand up for you no matter what.

“I got you babe, don’t worry. They don’t know what they’re talking about. I love you so much.”

You’re in a bad situation? No worries, Veneer always shows up at the right time.

~~~

You’d been waiting for Veneer in front of the restaurant. You were about five minutes early so you didn’t think he’d show up soon. You wore the best formal clothes you had.

You took out your phone, checking the time. You sighed. It was only a few more minutes of waiting now.

“Hey there, pretty lady. What’re you doin’ out in the cold so late at night? Surely, you don’t plan on spending the night out in the cold?” You felt someone put their hands on your shoulders as you immediately tensed up. You turned around.

“I’m sorry, Sir. But, I’m waiting for my boyfriend. Please go?” You tried to be polite, but it didn’t work on the man.

“Oh, please. As if you could ever have a boyfriend. Say, let’s go back to my place.. I can give you the ride of you li-!” He got cut off by a large buzzing sound. He collapsed to the floor and you backed away.

“Ugh, I hate men like that! Babe, are you okay? I’m so, so, so sorry I’m late.” Veneer held a tazer in his hands as he stepped on the man’s body. He walked up to you and slowly put his hand on your cheek.

“Wanna go somewhere else? I’m sorry our date got ruined..”

-

Velvet would definitely make sure you’re on top of your skincare routine. She wants you to have the best skin.

Velvet would definitely be the big spoon. Unless she’s in a really bad mood.. then it’d be small spoon for her.

She’d want you to shower her with both praise and gifts! I feel like she’d love it if someone bought her gifts.. even if she already had it.

I think she wouldn’t be that good of a communicator when it comes to relationships. But, she’s all ears about becoming better.

She’ll always listen to what you have to say. If someone bothers you? They don’t even exist anymore.

“There’s NO way he just said that to you. Don’t listen to him sweetheart, he doesn’t know you like I do. You’re very beautiful.”

If someone has wronged or is planning on wronging you, Velvet won’t hesitate to step in and defend you with her life. She might drag her fans into it if it’s a mega situation.

Velvet would LOVEE going on dates. She’d probably wanna go somewhere fun, like an amusement park perhaps?

~~~

While on an interview once, Kid Ritz told the viewers. Along with Velvet and Veneer, that’d you were probably just using her for money. That’s how people were with celebrities.

“Yeah! Say, Velvet. Aren’t you in a relationship right now? They’re probably only using you for money, y’know… how most people are with celebrities they’re with? Am I right?” He laughed.

Velvet was NOT laughing.

“What did you just say..?” Velvet snapped at him. “I’ll have you know, that they aren’t using me for money! They have their own money, they earn it themselves! Don’t you dare say that again. You really are pathetic. C’mon Veneer, we’re leaving this dump.”

Later on, you showered Velvet with kisses and love. You were very happy she defended you. You’d never even think about using her money. You had your own that you worked for.

Later in the night.. Velvet and Veneer got their fans to start attacking Kid Ritz over messages for what he said.

“Thank you so much for being here with me, my love.”

#veneer x reader #Velvet x reader #trolls 3 #trolls band together #velvet and veneer

[golden-eye-ramblings]

Renatus Revol Headcanon Dump Part 1

Woo wooo!! Time for Renatus headcanons! He’s not just a simple delinquent and I intend to convince y’all on why :3c. This will have manga spoilers! Gif credit to @fallinblossoms

————

Renatus Revol

Height: 5’10/180cm

Age: 26

Birthdate: November 1st

Sign: Scorpio

Gender: Cisgender

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: Bisexual

• While Renatus fits into the category of a delinquent brute with how lackadaisical and extreme he can be in terms of delivering punishment. He’s actually quite amicable like Ryoh and Kaldo. He’s just incredibly tired 24/7 due to his role and hasn’t gotten proper sleep in years(except for holidays, which he yearns for every day).

• Has developed the ability to sleep standing upright.

• His favorite food is fast food because it’s the only thing that’s usually available super late at night to eat. My man can NOT cook.

• Conversely his favorite drink is cheap beer because, once again, of how easily accessible it is during late hours.

• He enjoys reading ghost stories because it helps keep him up at night.

• Compared to the others who at least have decent homes or lavish spaces, Renatus lives in a cheap apartment. He still has things in boxes because he’s never had time to go home and truly unpack anything. The first thing one sees when entering his place is a single mattress on the floor, stacks of magazines and books, dirty containers of fast food and empty bottles. Truly a Male Living Space™️.

• Is actually quite the academic, although his memory isn’t what it used to be.

• And speaking of his memory issues. While I am inclined to believe that sleep may be a factor in it, I am also inclined to believe his immortality also plays a role in it.

• While he can regenerate at incredible speeds, it’s not entirely perfect. A crick in the neck? Simple, he just breaks his neck so the bones can set properly again. Back problems? Just break his back, no biggie. After his fight with Doom, his regeneration couldn’t keep up and he lost consciousness. And the healing process was not completely perfect when he came to(huge time shenanigans and mega manga spoilers aside). To summarize, he ended up with brain damage.

• People often think he’s forgetful because he’s just tired or lazy and doesn’t care enough to remember properly. While that’s *partially* true, it’s also because he has yet to really fully grasp how bad it really is. And he’s certainly not being careful with himself either. He’s always had memory issues but his lack of self preservation only exacerbated the problem.

• While he recalls that he gave up his mortality in order to save a girl he loved, he can’t recall if he did in fact save her. Nor even remember her name, or what she looked liked. He doesn’t think on it much in recent times, save for this weird funny feeling he gets in his chest whenever he traces his only scar.

• Renatus’ coworkers have yet to notice how bad his memory has gotten, Agito however has been assisting him in little ways. Such as leaving behind notes and helping him grab lunch and remind him of important events or work related things. He hasn’t noticed the changes fully.

• In terms of closeness with the other Divine Visionaries. He is closest with Agito, amicable with Tsurara, Ryoh and Rayne. Neutral with Orter. And on negative terms with Kaldo and Sophina. He enjoys teasing Sophina the most due to her strict school president like attitude.

• Does not remember Nerey. At all. Repeatedly even after Nerey has introduced himself several times. It’s unclear on whether or not he’s doing this as a bit or because Nerey’s genuinely not interesting enough to be remembered by Renatus.

#renatus revol #mashle magic and muscles #mashle headcanons #mashle #agito tyrone #sophina biblia #kaldo gehenna #ryoh grantz #orter madl #rayne ames #tsurara halestone #hits you with my surprise angst beam #mashle manga spoilers #Mashle gives me crumbs of information that I immediately devour and look into more #nerey shawn

[the-martyrfication-of-the-matron]

*hold gun cutely* Your turn to share headcannons for us to stea- take inspiration from

I find this so funny because there was a period of time where I only posted HCs… and it’s so weird bc damn I don’t do that anymore huh

A lot of my HCs have obviously changed in the 2/3 years I’ve been posting for this fandom, so…

Ahem.

If you ever want any SPECIFIC HCs, do ask, like I’m genuinely happy to offer any info you want. Anyways

DIVINE WARRIORS, because mfers keep talking about them.

TW, for like, sacrifices, and attempted child-murder/sacrifice... and child-on-mother cannibalism... if it counts as cannibalism when the child is a god.

They’re all gods or god-adjacent. Everyone talks about how they are making them not all gods, but fuck that man I find this fun.

They all reach their godhood in different ways, though. and godhood is something that is... complicated. fluid, even.

i'm just gonna talk about Shad (Judgement, in LR) and Irene, tho, bc otherwise this post would be mega fucking long. and i'm pretty sure i have a Kul'Zak ask anyways.

Y'know how people say 'the world is your oyster'? Well, the world is shad's egg. literally. He's the Draconic God of Death, and his entity was created in the belly (centre) of the earth, in heat and warmth and magma. He clawed his way out of the world, and this lore is mentioned in the prologue of LR, but his emergence from the core of the earth caused the earth to bunch up, and created mountains and valleys, and ravines. similarly to dropping a pebble into water, his emergence caused literal ripples. which is why most mountains and such are kind of in a radial pattern outwards from the 'belly of the world', which is just a huge fuck-off ravine. That said, not all mountains, because it's been thousands/millions of years since his emergence, and things do change. He was created as a god, before anyone knew what gods were. He was not the first being to exist, Early humans were around to witness his birth, but he is by far one of the most ancient. Hence why his followers call him 'the Ancient'.

Irene was born a god, though she was birthed by human parents. It's a whole situation, really, very lengthy. More about her mother than it really is about Irene. But she was born during the emergence. Her head crowned as Shad's emerged from the earth, and when he had fully freed himself and laid upon the cool ground, Irene was put into her mother's arms. Her and Shad are perfectly the same age, born at the same exact moment, to balance each other out. It's unclear which one sparked the creation of the other, but it doesn't matter. Both were born bloody and screaming, made to match. Irene was, however, not born looking human. She was a creature from day one. And she was ugly asf too bc like, she's feathered in her creature form, and have you ever seen fresh baby birds? Them mfers ugly. So, reasonably, her parents' people went 'aa' and decided to sacrifice her to the juvenile god of death bc they have volcanoes now, they can do that. However, Irene's mother was fiercely over-protective of her, and instead hid her in the woods to keep her out of the grasps of those wishing to harm her. She meant to go back and get her, so that she could find somewhere safe for her, but Irene's mother kind of got caesar'd (happy ides of march for two days ago), for trying to keep the fucked up little thing she birthed. Her body was dumped into the forest, and Irene ended up finding it and going 'oh a snack'. so... that's fun. However, as is how blood magic works, when one of magic consumes the heart of another, they consume their entirety. It was how Irene claimed a human form, by eating a human heart, and whilst it wasn't particularly an instantaneous transformation, it also lead to her becoming a mother. If not for eating her own mother's heart, she never would've had the maternal traits that ending up characterising her for most of her existence.

half of the irene stuff wasn't even info on how she became a god lmao, just 'oh she was born that way... also she ate her mother lmao'

#could get into the metaphors but nahhhhh #tw cannibalism #tw sacrifice #tw attempted child murder #aphmau #aphverse #aphblr #rewrite #minecraft diaries #mcd #ranthredo #Lycoris Radiata/Ranthredo #maybe i should make a 'ranth lore' tag

[a-queer-seminarian]

big ol' worry dump, i promise i'll post something rebloggable soon but i'm still processing everything and have not had time to write it coherently! cw queerphobia from the pulpit, church hurt, verbal violence, and brief csa mention (not a specific case)

SO. for anyone not keeping up, this past Sunday i visited my childhood church in ohio, and was devastated when near the end of his homily (Catholic word for sermon haha) my childhood pastor suddenly switched from celebrating the Spirit who bursts through closed doors to proclaiming that The Church Is Under Attack from people like the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. :/

After he finished and sat down, i stood up and got behind the lectern/pulpit to remind him and everyone in the room that queer and trans people have the Holy Spirit too, because his words implied otherwise. And i could not risk that any other person there felt suddenly and utterly alone — i had to make sure they knew that not everyone agreed with our priest's message.

(Here's a place you can watch a clip of the homily — obviously mega content warning for homophobia, please keep yourself safe and remember you are loved!! — as well as my response)

Not long into speaking, I was escorted peacefully out of the building. Two parishioners followed and found me outside, and thanked me for what i said. They were very sweet <3

As we were talking, another parishioner stormed out and got very, very verbally violent. It was scary shit.

Other parishioners eventually came out and led Scary Man away, thankfully. The church's other, younger & newer priest, Father Jim, also came out to apologize profusely to us. Then i went home. My wife and i flew home to Georgia the next morning.

____

and...stuff keeps happening.

i did not expect this to make the news, but it did. the Cleveland Plain Dealer wrote on it, and so have other papers across the country.

an officer called me to ask if i wanted to press charges on Scary Man. I don't, because i'm just not convinced the results would be helpful to actually stopping him from doing what he did again.

if anyone has resources or someone smart i could talk to for advice on alternatives to cops & court for a situation like this, please hit me up!!!

after agreeing to an interview with the Plain Dealer reporter, which used my first and last name, folks have been finding me on social media to offer their support, which actually has been so uplifting and i plan to post some of the messages later!

my parents are proud of me and support me BUT my mom is worried sick that someone is going to, like, find out where i live and come attack me. i'd be more worried that they find out who my parents are and go attack them, tbh.

i've had more sudden spikes of adrenaline in the past five days than i have in the past like, 2 years lol

i've also talked with more different individuals on the phone in the past five days than i had over the rest of 2023 so far

i was scrolling through twitter last night and randomly came across a tweet featuring a TikTok of a cut-down version of my priest's homily + my response...i really don't like what parts they cut out, or what they titled it. and it's got over a million views. :OOO

there's a lot of confusion in the replies — people who don't realize i'm a former parishioner, not an active one; people not knowing how to gender me which is fine but it's, you know, getting a little grating; and of course, people resorting to saying Father Tim must be "closeted gay" or otherwise have a Sinister Secret himself to say what he said...I hate that kind of rhetoric.

Not every person who spouts homophobia is secretly gay. The Biggest Homophobes are usually, shockingly, straight.

And flippantly suggesting that anyone, even a Catholic priest, is a pedophile without facts to back that accusation up only serves to harm csa victims — because then when there really is a case that needs to be pursued, people may not take it seriously.

one big thing that's bothering me about how everyone on every side of the debate is interpreting Father Tim's homily is they are focusing mostly on his condemnation of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence — and while I certainly oppose what he said about them, it's actually the first half of his message that scared me more: the stuff about the church being under attack and how Christians must defend it. He ended with a vague reminder to do so "peacefully," without any examples about how that's even done. And obviously, Scary Man didn't absorb that part of the message.

sigh. i was really hoping that agreeing to an interview with the plain dealer reporter who wrote the first article would give me a chance to explain why i felt i had to interrupt Mass, but unfortunately they didn't include those quotes. i'm really disappointed.

that article's title also says "attendee fired back," using exactly the kind of violence-coded language that I had a problem with in F. Tim's homily. So that's really unfortunate.

which is why i want to write up my perspective. i did send a long ass email to father tim the other night explaining what i did, why his message was hurtful AND fueled his parishioner's violence, and asking if we could talk about alternative ways to hold Scary Man accountable beyond the law. he hasn't responded yet.

anyway. yeah. it's been. a lot. good vibes and prayers are so very appreciated! and seriously, if anyone has resources about alternatives to legal action when we're dealing with someone who got very verbally violent and physically aggressive, i'd love some help figuring out what to do. also any thoughts about like, keeping myself safe? yeah

Anyway, gonna end with the affirmation that God made us Good; human diversity is what it looks like to be in the image of an Infinite creator; and queerness is a holy gift that the Body of Christ can't do without!!

Amen and amen.

#log #gonna start tagging these #Pentecost Incident

[sundove88]

My Headcanons on Mega Man’s Robot Masters- Part 4

ToadMan:

He is surprisingly a big fan of rainy days and has a leaf umbrella.

One of his biggest aspirations is to find someone who will genuinely smooch him- aka a “Princess”.

He has a surprisingly long tongue that can reach as far as a chameleon’s.

BrightMan:

Everyone always looks at him when they get an idea.

One of his common nicknames is “Lightbulb”.

He has an entire book around ideas.



PharaohMan:

When it comes to his punches- he most certainly does NOT hold back.

His living quarters are like he dumped an entire bucket of gold paint and a briefcase of gold bricks into it.

And he also has a pet robotic black cat he calls “Bastet”.

RingMan:

He has a nack for detective novels- Especially Noir ones.

His alter ego is “Detective Gilded”.

And he has a massive Spidey-Sense, aka he always trusts his gut.

DustMan:

Three words- Utter neat freak.

His favorite scents are fresh ones, especially chamomile and laundry detergent.

He really likes cleaning and ensures that the whole area is spotless when he’s done.

SkullMan:

He’s starred in a bunch of milk commercials- because milk is good for your bones.

Whenever he gets angry, his left eye flashes a bright blue- sound familiar?

He can actually take himself apart with as little effort.

DiveMan:

Has a fierce rivalry with PirateMan.

As much as he doesn’t want to admit it, he has a crush on Splash Woman as well.

He has a ton of naval medals somewhere in his living quarters.

DrillMan:

Like his Fully Charged counterpart, he loves playing the piano.

He and Metal Man get into fierce rivalries over who is sharper.

One of his more recent hobbies is collecting gems.

#my headcanons #livi’s rambles #mega man #mega man 4 #toadman #brightman #pharaohman #ringman #dustman #skullman #diveman #drillman

[see-arcane]

Death May Die

In Transylvania, an ancient book calls up a familiar face.

In the office of Hawkins and Harker, two men are found dead.

In dimensions far apart and horribly near, Jonathan Harker finds himself put to strange and sinister new work.

All the while, something shadows him through the worlds. It is old. It is cold. And it expects its due.

For those not in the know, this is a sizable ‘what-if?’ scenario based loosely on the premise of The League of Extraordinary Gentlefolk comic-in-progress putting its roots down on Tumblr, a glorious public domain mega crossover and antidote to Alan Moore’s unpleasant take on the idea. Shout out to the amazing @mayhemchicken-artblog for all the fantastic work already put into the project.

Ao3 link here

That is not dead which can eternal lie,

and with strange aeons, even death may die.

 They waited for night before bringing out the book. It only seemed appropriate. He had needed to pay the local idiots twice the worth of their guidance to the spot, and another doubling to ensure they stayed on site while the ritual was performed. They thought it was to serve as a guard. Against wolves? Against the strangers who had first chased them down that fateful sunset two years prior and hacked their undead quarry into base elements? Q supposed these were reasonable enough excuses and so let them carry on believing them. It wouldn’t matter what they believed soon.

Q, as he was known in his less than legitimate dealings—which were his most frequent and personally lucrative ones—had been livid for the past two years. Which was a risky thing for his heart, his doctors told him. Q was reaching the far end of his life, his health balanced precariously on everything from peak cuisine to the most high-end of modern medicines. But he would be a liar if he said he had not dabbled in more esoteric treatments. Possibilities, rather. He had had none of his own success with the cures he sought, only played witness. Vulture. The pleading Dickensian waif pressed against the window of the one candy shop his wealth could not buy from.

 Eternity. O God, O Devil, O profanities in-between, eternity was real. It was in reach. And, by certain fantastic avenues, it could be applied to the flesh. That was Q’s chief concern above all else. He had come into many a harvested proof of eternity for the soul and of the myriad dumping grounds into which it might fly once the carcass died around it. Even before this grand hunt of his began, Q had known he was a man with a dearth of conscience. It seemed a superfluous thing in his life. Life had never bothered to prove him wrong for thinking so. The holy houses’ various Scriptures were all so much mist and pleading to be believed. It was all well and good that their flocks bought the lie of reward for the suffering and retribution to the glutted; the meek could go on pretending they would inherit the Earth until the day they rotted away in their squalor.

Q and his fellow betters were always happy to toast them and their virtue from their perches encased in filigree and acreage. At least, he had been. Back when he was young. Even when he was silvering. But circumstances had changed. Time had happened and Death was whetting a blade at his doorstep. And, for better or worse, certain uncanny revelations that went beyond the scope of any faith stamped in sacred script or tablet had reached his eyes, and mind, and the shuddering kernel of his heart.

Possibility hovered just out of reach. Safety from time, from the nothings and the worse-than-nothings after his living time ran out. Damn it all, he had been so close with Dr. Black and the experiment inflicted on his wife. Good dear Agnes Black, who had been prey to the soul extraction. The opal prison of spirit, a dazzling crystal chamber of inmost light... So he had been informed.

When Q had returned from Paris on his latest errand, only to discover from Mr. Davies that the imbecilic Travers had been scammed by some pretender with the secret code for exchange, that the imprisoned soul had been stolen again in almost the same heartbeat as the hired help had robbed Dr. Black, he had been angry. When he discovered that Dr. Black himself had died from a shock at the robbery, leaving the secret of extraction a mystery once more, he had been enraged past the point of words. Enough to strain his heart to the edge of safety.

Sighing, he had needed to tranquilize himself. It had been a small balm to see how Travers died. Likewise his pet idiot Sam. They got around to the latter’s errand woman too, once the man had squealed that she had thrown away the code paper. It was something, he supposed. Though it would have been better if his experts had been able to harvest anything worthwhile from them. The brighter minds in his employ kept insisting that such boons as organ transplants would come into the field someday; oh, it would have been lovely to have a few spare hearts to play with. Better still if he might have that deranged miracle man, the very Victor Frankenstein of medical legend, on call. But no. Not possible as yet, Mr. Q, not yet.

And yet, all that may only have been a prelude to bring him here. To the benighted wilds of Transylvania, and to the bloodstained bastard offshoot of Lazarus that might yet be plied for aid. The legends went that the figure he sought had learned his arts and won his vicious immortality from study in the mythic Scholomance. A rare tutelage, a dangerous one, with its infernal lessons being the fruit of years. Years Q did not have. But his visit to Paris had suggested there were other routes to pursue.

Routes that required certain reading. Specifically, reading that Q had also dropped a fair sum to have performed on this night, using a certain tome of unique repute. Mr. Davies stood behind the professor as the man recited; an additional insurance should the fellow have a sudden attack of stage fright or morals. Thankfully, the nebbish gentleman seemed prepared to put his underappreciated profession to use for its own sake, with or without the fattening of his bank account.

The rite was read. The night sky rumbled and groaned though there were no clouds. Q saw the stars had changed out of their proper constellations from one blink to the next and that the moon had been stained as if with disease. Around him, the locals murmured and chafed. He knew from their leader that the scene of that distant November dusk had been enough to put at least half his men off a return for any fee; they had been paid by a monster to do a monster’s bidding. They would not gamble twice.

“I pay better than any monster,” Q had assured, “and the only goal I have in mind is an experiment. No harrowing chases at my age. Should the experiment fail, and it very well might, the worst you and yours shall suffer for your pay is a great deal of boredom in the dark and a few pelts if the wolves get pesky.” He had not told them what would happen if the experiment was successful. Perhaps those few who came out had guessed at half of it. Perhaps they even thought themselves safe, being in the aegis of a former master. Perhaps they just could not afford to turn the money away regardless.

The latter were always Q’s favorites among hirelings. Inevitably the most expendable and dependable help in a single package, bless them.

They made noise as the atmosphere began to curdle. The professor sweated despite the cold, babbling on and on in that brittle tongue as if his own tongue no longer belonged to him enough to stop. Even Mr. Davies, a man as emotive as a statue even in his grimmest work, swallowed thickly in the bonfire’s light. The air itself bunched and writhed around them in protest. It lent an odd quality to the men’s shift from mere anxious talk to outright screams. A din that turned up to a shrieking choir as the bonfire blew out. All that was left to them was the noxious glow of the moon.

Yet that was all Q needed. Even with the creep of cataracts and the night’s own over-dense dark, he could see. All of them could.

What they saw was a thin man of extraordinarily bloodless pallor. He stood with his back to them, his hair a black cascade. When he turned his head, Q saw a single lantern-bright eye find his own. A peephole into Hell. Below that, the white shine of a grin with sabers for teeth.

It was him.

Finally.

“Count Dracula?” Q ventured.

The figure did not answer. Only smiled wider.

“I have heard a great many things of what you accomplished over the course of generations. It saddened me to learn of your loss. My native England would have flourished under such influence as yours, as it may still. I have endeavored, at great expense, to retrieve you from the outer spaces where such powerful souls as yours reside. I’ve no doubt that to you it was only the briefest respite, and I thank you most sincerely for answering our summons.”

The figure examined his nails. Their points caught on the moonlight.

“To be frank, Count, I am in need of your tutelage. Your wisdom. I would seek to do as you do, to exist as you exist. I have sources who name you as one of those rarities among the undead who retained his intellect and will despite the change. This I would—,”

“Are these meant to be for me?” The clawed hand had gestured airily at the gawping guides.

“Yes,” Q said aloud. “I expected you would be thirsty upon return.”

This received a hum of meager acknowledgment. A rosy flare of the eyes. Q braced to see the work of his teeth, the siphoning of life in action.

While he did see the latter, the former played no part.

It was a sight to behold, even in that lunar half-light. There was no avoiding the the red shine as the blood wept and drooled and sweated from the screaming mass of Q’s guides. Their leader garbled something wetly at him—Q, not the Thing ordering his veins to empty themselves through his skin—and tried to raise his pistol. Mr. Davies put a hole through his head first. For the first time since the man joined Q’s employ, Mr. Davies seemed at the edge of attempting mercy, for the muzzle of his gun almost drifted to the heads of the others writhing and crawling on the ground. Q waved him down. Their guest was clearly enjoying himself.

Really, it was somewhat entertaining. The insects upon the lowest rung of the ladder, flopped on stomachs and backs, twitching like beetles fresh from a lost battle with a bootheel. Their blood did not drip down, but rose up in slow glistening loops and arches on the air. Ruby ribbons. They drifted on some unseen river up toward the sharp smile of the harvester, close, closer, closest…

“On second thought, I’m not all that peckish. Never mind.” With a gesture, the blood stopped its migration and landed like a sudden coagulating rain upon the dirt. Its former owners were speckled with the spray. “Let us skip the morsels and the poor attempt at a grovel. You have never asked for anything in your life, and so have no talent for a convincing imitation. Such is the cost of only ever having to buy or steal what you want in the stuttering gold-congested heartbeat you call a life. You do not want lessons. You want a shortcut to immortality. This I can give you.”

The grin widened again. Horribly. Q had been given to understand that a vampire of any strain was prone to over-wide smiles, sometimes of a bestial shape. Count Dracula, he had heard, often wore the toothy rictus of a bat or wolf. This grimace was not that. It looked, if anything, like an amateur sculptor’s rendition of rigor mortis combined with the worst of those freakish creatures dredged up from the lowest shadows of the ocean. The sight of it made his skin want to peel like bad wallpaper and his eyes to crawl away to be spared the proximity.

Quite inexplicably, Q felt certain this Dracula could make such happen.

“However, I require a menial favor of my own. Not these table scraps,” he nodded at the human detritus at their feet, “but a more gourmet offering.”

“Such as what? Name your fare and I shall acquire it.”

“No, you shall not. You couldn’t if you tried. You’ve many a fine dog at your disposal, this one included,” he inclined his head toward Mr. Davies, who managed to appear a shade greener in the dark. “But the individual I have in mind would leave them headless in an instant. Not necessarily by such polite means as a blade. No, we shall go to him. Of you, I ask only the infant task of being present. I would like him to know exactly what has happened since he and his companion swung down their steel.” He gave a small laugh. Q thought he felt something die in both ears. “I am so dearly looking forward to his face. Ah, and before I forget.”

The blazing eyes turned upon the professor. He still clutched the book in both shaking hands. A whiff of ammonia wafted from below his belt.  

“You mispronounced fhtagn,” the grin intoned.

“O-Oh?”

“Yes. Wrong intonation on the ta. Just thought you should know.”

“I’m sorry! I’m so terribly sorry—!”

A white hand waved.

“No harm done. Even the cultists a hundred generations deep mispronounce half their empty rites. It is not their fault their makers failed to design them with the appropriate vocalizing necessities. You only have one tongue, one throat, two lungs. But even such grating lilts as yours and theirs can buzz in distant ears.” A great sigh was heaved. “It does the job. As for that,” he leveled a sharp nail at the book, “keep it closed and keep it close. Just because you open the way for a specific guest does not mean others will not seek an opportunity to slip through. Most not nearly so cordial as myself.”

The professor clapped the ancient tome shut as if hit with an electric current and, despite the clear shudder it gave him, hugged the volume close. His eyes darted frantically about the night as if there might already be some tagalong to the Count skulking in the shadows. Mr. Davies did likewise. Q even caught himself at it.

“Just a precaution, my friends. Always wise to be wary under such stars as these. But come, we delay our transaction. Immortality waits at the other end of a final errand in your England. It will require only the smallest effort, just as infinity shall be a mere nothing to me.”

Q did his utmost not to notice the copper odor thickening the air, likewise the almost voyeuristic cast of the moon as it hovered behind the voivode’s looming head. He was alright. Of course he was alright. This smiling horror would have unmade him in an instant if he wished; if he could. The crucifix at Q’s throat and the garlic blossoms lining his coat were as good as armor. Yes. Yes.

“Yes?” he asked, proud at the steadiness of his voice. “What effort is that?”

“You have an appointment to make concerning the acquiring of new real estate.” A forest of teeth bristled as the lips peeled up in an even deeper sickle smile. “One you will make with the firm of Hawkins and Harker.”

Harker. The name echoed in Q’s recollection. A name that had come up more than once as his men went digging. One the ravished lady, the other the pawn husband who had chased Dracula back to his land and—

“If it’s a matter of recompense for your,” Q gestured at his own throat, “premature exit, I have resources that can see to the matter most expediently. Within a week, I can have Jonathan Harker and Quincey Morris in a windowless room to be addressed as you see fit. Likewise Mrs. Harker. Give me a fortnight, and I shall have the entire cadre at your feet.”

At this, Count Dracula’s expression did not alter. Only his eyes flickered, though not with red. It was a color without name. A color that seared and flamed with a heat and hate worse than Hell and further than Heaven. It even seemed to boil the Count’s pupils, for, in the space of a moment, they seemed to…

“If I wish for you to decide what I want, Lord Oliver Quentin Brighton, I will surely inform you. In the meantime, you will make your appointment with Hawkins and Harker.”

“Yes. Yes, of course.”

“Of course.” The eyes were merely red. The pupils were merely pupils. “It is new to you, isn’t it? Acquiescence. But it is only natural for you small kings among men. No matter. Let us be gone and leave the wolves to their late supper.”

“Your coffin,” Mr. Davies croaked, his eyes not quite rising to meet Dracula’s. “We have a coffin filled with earth waiting with the horses.”

“How thoughtful. But I shall not need it. Death has provided more than rest enough. It is a wonder anyone fears it as they do.” Dracula turned from them, the anatomy of his face realigning into a configuration that was nearly wistful. “Death is rest. Death is respite. Death is an end and a close and a one-way threshold to what comes next.” The wistfulness crimped under another put-upon sigh as he faced Q a last time. “But even death may die. Come, little man. Let us go kill yours.”

 Jonathan Harker was fairly certain his eyes were ready to fall out of his head. He was not certain whether this would be a loss or a gain for him. If nothing else, it would mean not having to scour yet another page of yet another sheaf of yet another wad of potentially vital—or just as potentially trivial—news reports and dusty arcana surrounding the overlap between ancient powers and modern bouts of uncanny happenings of late. These quarries were of the sort that made the miseries surrounding Dracula’s activity seem like a mere hiccough compared to the more odious work of these weightier horrors.

When had that happened, by the way?

Certainly the League had been no stranger to supernatural threats since its inception. Likewise for the various disconnected heroes, victims, and individuals carrying both banners who confronted human and inhuman perils alike. Prying into the histories of specific locations revealed cases of sporadic events that mirrored the attacks and accidents of the present day, though those older cases were given greater due than the contemporary instances; scientific explanations appeared to melt away so much of superstition that it worked in favor of the truly paranormal.

Hysteria! Bad dreams! Anxiety! Poor diet! And, of course, that easy and all-encompassing blanket: Madness!

Jack and Van Helsing were both of the bittersweet opinion that the latter was responsible for the seeming uptick in overt supernatural evils flexing their muscles. So much had been disproven that the bogeymen were shielded by disbelief until it was too late to admit the stranger truth. Jonathan hadn’t much room to disagree with them, considering how well denial had played into that first fateful stay in Transylvania. By the time he’d broken through to acceptance of the impossible reality, he was already a prisoner.  

But then, Holmes had made his own fair point: It was just as likely that events and entities, be they weird or wondrous, had always been happening, but this budding age of information and interconnection now shined a far broader light upon the shadows in which they dwelled. More lines could be drawn between A and B, X and Y, and the result simply illustrated phenomena that had been present all along. In this, Jonathan could also find decent footing.

Except…

If these miracles and threats have always been here, even in a fraction of the occurrences we have met, how is it they could have slipped into obscurity at all? How could we mislabel any of them as superstition rather than hold to them as fact as time and progress marched on? How, unless they were rare enough once upon a time, enough to be shrugged off as mere fantasy, only for them to raise their heads in greater number today? For all that we’ve done, all we’ve accomplished, does it not seem that there are more and more extraordinary things in need of our attention recently? Things of increasing potency, increasing pressure and power. As if we were all frogs in the same pot with the heat turning up and up as we prove ourselves too sturdy to be cooked in lesser temperatures.

There is more happening today than there was before. I know it. I feel it. It itches in the cold corners of me that whisper and chafe and tug me after the scent of some fresh Thing in need of hunting. And I think it is going to kill me. I don’t know what, I don’t know how. But I am sure of it. Something extraordinary will happen soon. And I will die to it.

Today.

“No, you will not,” he half-yawned to himself. “You’re just tired. That is the whole of it.” He ground the heels of both palms against his eyes, trying to crush the fatigue heat out of them. “You haven’t been this bad since—,”

Tonight is mine. Tomorrow is yours!

He bit his tongue to the edge of bleeding. Bit and bit and did not think of—

Awake, awake, the sound of her screams in your ears, fell asleep, stayed asleep, your idiot brain pinned under the monster’s thumb while he was there, in your bed, in her throat—

“Stop. Just stop. Not here.”

His teeth did not unlock to say this. No more than his voice rose above a whisper. It had been all he could do not to simply throw his last client’s paperwork in his pinched face rather than locking into his default charm to win the prickly fellow back into the dealing. Despite having a small and highly capable legion at Hawkins and Harker’s disposal, it was not unheard of to have those of the upper echelons insist on dealing directly with the head of the firm, as if this would somehow imbue their potential properties with greater value. A feat that may have been more doable if it were not for Jonathan splitting himself down the middle to juggle the firm and his work with Mina and the League.

That, if nothing else, was proof enough that the situation was starting to bloat.

What had begun as a comparatively leisurely balance of his working worlds was now a precarious act that risked his livelihood and those of his employees on one end and actual lives on the other. And that went without mentioning the strain of the performance for Mina. It was already hell enough for her and Irene to maintain the cogs that made the League tick. If she knew exactly how close to collapse he was at any given moment in these last few months, her own focus would shatter like glass.

Not that she did not already suspect something, of course. Whatever psychic awareness now roosted in her mind after Dracula’s attack—a power that even Clarimonde suggested might have been jostled loose rather than simply implanted and left as a souvenir—had flowered tremendously. With practice, intuition had extended to such a powerful certainty that she could pinpoint every member of the League within a mile. Jonathan, she said, could now be detected anyplace in the world. Such had been proven on a recent adventure that had placed them at opposite ends of the world. To chip away at her nervousness, Mina had used her journal to record the rough global coordinates she’d assumed Jonathan to be in alongside Fogg’s terse company on any given date, and both had been shocked to find her readings exact in every case.

“Better call up Nemo,” Griffin had hummed. “See if he can’t repeat the underwater trick with a deep enough trench.”

It was a poor joke on more than one count. Especially as, not long afterwards, the Nautilus had brushed terribly, unthinkably close to its own deep-sea peril. Worse than the malformed sea creatures. Worse than the aquatic folk they had met off America’s eastern coast. So awful, in fact, that Nemo had seen fit to dock the Nautilus in the secure shore Art had arranged, the better to let himself and his men find refuge on dry land for a spell. The very first threads of silver had cut through the Captain’s hair. Aronnax had handed Van Helsing his latest journal with three conditions:

“Read it. Record what you need. Then kindly burn it.”

Nemo’s input had been colder still:

“It is older than the sea, whatever it is. It was never native to the ocean, or Earth itself. I refuse to believe it. Dead for now. But not forever.” His eyes, bloodshot obsidian, had rolled to meet Jonathan’s. They seemed to hunt for answers there. “It thought that at us while we walked in those giants’ halls. Dreamed it at us. And it dreamed you too. Something you’re meant to do.”

“What?” Jonathan remembered asking. He couldn’t remember if he had been shaken by the notion or by the fact that he hadn’t felt shaken. Only tired. Expectant.

“There were no words in it, only an intention. Something in the tone of,” Nemo had frowned, “‘Take a message.’ I don’t understand it. It seemed too blunt, too mundane in the thick of all the nightmare that saturated that place. Yet all the men felt the same when I asked them of it. Those who could bring themselves to speak.”

That was two weeks ago. An experience added to a pile that had been sectioned off to contain the sundry ancient menaces that had been unearthed in northern England and Wales. The death of Francis Leicester, despite occurring in London, had led them northward to such horrors as the resurrection and revenge of the demigoddess Helen Vaughn, to the Little People and the vanishing of Professor Gregg, the ethnologist whose absent body had been blamed by a lawyer on a mere misadventure in a river, to the white figures who danced and bled hungry magic in the hills, to the Great God Pan and his satyr-scratching at the walls of reality.

On a limestone boulder, their most recent finding was sent to them by Gregg’s former governess and secretary, Miss Lally, alongside a concerned party, Mr. Phillips. The latter had gone inspecting the area the lauded Professor Gregg had vanished in—for Miss Lally would not bring herself or Gregg’s freshly orphaned twins back there for any ransom—and discovered some odd writing upon a limestone boulder, etched in red earth. He’d copied it, given it to Miss Lally, and the resulting message had been decoded by way of a black stone seal unearthed in Babylon. She had sent the message their way:

‘The hills fold. The soul bends. Pale man of death will hear the message.’

Which all went without mentioning the more infectious mess of The King in Yellow. What had begun as a single ominous volume bound in snakeskin presenting itself as a one-of-a-kind volume full of reality-denting power was now, inexplicably, appearing in high-end bookshops and the murmurs of the theatergoing crowds as an inorganic urban legend. Something that rubbed shoulders with the Scottish Play’s rule in terms of bad luck, but worse. Jonathan and Mina had seen a paperback of it looking at them through a window less than a week ago. And then Lord Henry Wotton had picked it up on a dare.

Dorian Gray had caught him doing it. He’d seen Wotton’s eyes skim dully over the ‘pedestrian’ masquerade scene’s opening act. Gray had tried to get the book away from him, to stop him reaching the second act. Wotton had laughed and let him burn the thing, promising he’d not touch the accursed volume now. After all, a book penned by the Devil should at least be more thrilling than the average gothic terror and the first act had thoroughly disappointed him…

“I should have known,” Gray had moaned as, in some secret room, his portrait wailed and tore at itself in the canvas, “I should have known he’d get another copy. Of course he wanted to prove himself better than the story. Everyone knows it now. Everyone knows it does not strike until you read the second act, that’s the rumor in every snug from the highest end to the lowest pub, and he just couldn’t—couldn’t help himself—,” And he had wept in full, tearing at himself without leaving a mark.

Lord Wotton presumably bought his new copy and read that infamous second act. Whatever it was. There was no way to tell from the man himself. Jack had heard from his former staff that what was left of him had not changed since his family placed him under the asylum’s care, for better or worse. Only that he continued to talk or scream or plead or patter with party guests that were not there, and occasionally had to be stopped from ‘unmasking’ himself by clawing his face.

“I say, mine appears to have been pasted on,” he was reported to say, “Does anyone have a letter-opener?” Then, as late as last week, “Oh, and His Tattered Majesty deigned to pass on that he is quite busy at the moment. Tell Dorian to tell his pallid solicitor friend to take a message.”

Naturally, all eyes had started gravitating Jonathan’s way. Concerned gazes, wondering gazes, gazes that conspired about how to politely insist he perhaps take an extended vacation from the outside world and have a good long stay in the League’s densely warded walls. Jonathan had bitten his tongue before he could mutter a word about the sadly dubbed, ‘Wallpaper Women,’ who had, paradoxically, been victims of a sort of yellow—or was it Yellow?—wallpaper in a bedroom of a country home where a throng of wife after wife was kept shut up and immobile ‘for their own good.’ The diary entries of the latest victim had gone into harrowing detail of where she and her predecessors might have gone after the room had its full effect.

A diary they had found just prior to unearthing a loose board under the bolted bed, pressed up against the wall where the hideous paper had never been clawed.

An edition of The King in Yellow had been there. Not snakeskin, not the paperback that would not even be on shelves yet. But a hardcover whose pages were worn with reading and re-reading by some unknown hand. The name scratched inside read, Hildred Castaigne. Below that was a bookseller’s stamp, declaring it had been sold in an American shop.

In the year 1919.

If some force is out there making plans around me at this scale, I don’t see any way of guarding against it. This is not the fodder of penny dreadfuls. Not cutthroats and tyrants, vampires and werewolves. There is only so much we can prepare for or fight against. I feel now what I first felt in that damned castle. Powerless. Even with all I have done since, all I have gained, I feel it. I know it. Whatever means to happen will happen to me. Sitting in our headquarters waiting for it to come is only painting a target on everyone else.

None of which he said aloud.

All of which Mina had read in his face as if he had written it there in crayon. He’d tried to smile and she could not mirror it.

“Just a while longer,” she had whispered into his neck. In bed, they had folded around each other like two hands gripping. Her warm, him cold. Even now. So, so cold. “Tell them you’re ill, tell them it’s an emergency. Holt and the rest can manage well enough.”

“They have been managing for almost a month. Robert is a talent and a godsend, but he and my former fellows can’t cover for my absence indefinitely. It is not enough to our bigger clients that good work is done. If rumor comes along to stain a reputation—say, to do with the flighty new boy who Hawkins left his business and estate to, followed immediately by his dying—,”

“You are not a new boy. You’ve been steering the firm for two years now.”

“Which is ‘new’ to anyone over forty years of age. I have been able to keep several plates spinning for a while now. But I cannot ignore that particular plate any longer than this current stint. Not if I don’t want to step on important toes and leave us and my employees holding the bill. It was miracle enough that I happened to catch on to that trouble with the ‘Lady Ducayne’ business. Saved us a lost client and a few lives in the same breath. But that isn’t the sort of coincidence that crops up regularly.”

“Does Hawkins’ legacy matter more to you than your own life?”

“Mina.”

“Does it matter more than not leaving me a widow before we’ve had even half a decade to wear our rings?”

“Mina.”

“Jonathan. Please.”

“I cannot hide in here forever. Life won’t allow for that, no matter how mundane or monstrous. I have to.” He’d breathed into her hair. “You know I have to.”

“Then I should be with you. I never did get to play secretary to you.”

A writhing chill had moved in his bones at that.

“We are a bit too late on that track, I’m afraid. The position is taken.” Then, lower. “And the League needs you more.”

“Do not say that. Do not talk to me about need.” Her hand had trembled where she gripped him. His did likewise. “For God’s sake, Jonathan, it’s just a job! Retire early, take up a new vocation, become a travelogue writer, do something, anything that does not—that doesn’t—,”

“Put me at risk? I have been at risk since the night Dracula thrust me into his caleche. Risk has never left me. It has been walking side by side with me every day and every night by dint of what we do here. How we help the world and safeguard it from being devoured. That won’t change if I’m here or if I’m in my neglected office.”

Or, he did not say and failed not to think, becoming the unofficial hunting dog and part-time psychopomp of our merry band. Death and I have been holding hands since I first picked up the kukri. Now it won’t let go even when the blade is sheathed. It is here, now, in our room, Mina. It is everywhere I am and it speaks. Constantly. Sometimes a whisper. Sometimes a howl. But it speaks to me. It steers me. It wears my skin like a glove. Only in times of need; that I will not deny. But it does all these things—and it has not been wrong once.

I doubt it is wrong now. About me. About how much time is left.

And Mina, Mina, I do not want to bring my end knocking at this chamber door. Not where it might touch you. Not where you would have to see it happen.

So here he was, in his office instead. He would not have dared to stay inside if he had felt that warning prickle upon seeing any of his employees. Their…what was it? Life clock? Corporeal limit? Whatever it was that dictated the approach of a life’s end, it had not appeared to flare out at him in any of the familiar faces. Not even good Robert Holt’s wan countenance showed a trace of danger. This, when it had taken three of the doctors in their menagerie to help resuscitate the bedraggled man after his own hellish stint with a supernatural master.

He had stayed with the Harkers for the better part of a year before they walked him back through the minutiae of acquiring his own flat again. Helped in no small part by his already having a job waiting for him at Hawkins and Harker. Between this and how soundly the so-called ‘Beetle’ had been addressed with the aid of Clarimonde and a steady grisly application of cold steel, Robert Holt had already more than sworn a knight’s loyalty to the League’s secrets and more than a relative’s love to the Harkers themselves. A fact compounded by what both Jonathan and Mina had divulged of their own experiences—an account that had pried open the full deluge from Robert’s miserable tongue and ended in a catharsis salted with tears.

All of which was to say that Jonathan found himself immediately relieved to see that Robert’s life looked hale and long before him. In turn, Robert lit up upon seeing Jonathan like a lantern erupting into a campfire.

“Jonathan,” he’d begun. Aware of the many heads turning, he’d coughed and began again with, “Mr. Harker, good morning! How was your trip?”

“Longer than I’d have liked it to be,” he said in full earnest. “But there are some clients more demanding than others.”

“Harker, you have a small army to do your runaround work for you these days. You keep doing the grunt work and sweeping dust off your desk and you’ll go out like a candle.”

This came from Mr. Bentley, who had, in fact, recently announced he was making a change of occupation to start up his own firm. He’d been a solicitor for far longer under Hawkins and had seen the ‘writing on the wall,’ so to speak, in terms of nepotism; even if it was between a man and a boy who was son in everything but blood. Jonathan had never been able to tell if the man’s ribbing was in true mirth or a manner of bitter coping with the clerk-turned-solicitor; one who had made up for Peter Hawkins’ kindness twice over in his adamant work. And then, after the misery of the Transylvanian client had come and gone, there was the gift-wrapped firm and Hawkins’ own keenly timed natural death—as if the old man had been holding out just long enough to pass the barely-revived successor his keys in apology and farewell—Jonathan the Clerk was suddenly Mr. Harker the Employer.

No, Jonathan did not quite blame him if he was sour or not. Robert, knowing what he did, had a few hackles up already. These hackles came down when Bentley got a better look at his almost-ex-employer in full, and all the smiles, reinforced or otherwise, melted away into something very near to worry.

“God’s sake, where did this last one drag you off to? Back to Transylvania?”

Jonathan bit his inner cheek as even more heads craned around. Worse, Robert was scrutinizing him up close. The word ‘Transylvania’ had become a prickly word about the office ever since Jonathan’s initial return to the country. Rumors simmered in whispers and theories whenever they thought he couldn’t hear them. Usually in a concerned spirit as much as a baffled one. ‘Halfdead Harker’ was one of the favored epithets. One fellow, thoroughly drowned in eggnog around December of last year, had asked him outright if he was a vampire. Laughing. Jonathan had laughed back, telling him he certainly hoped not, or else he would have to quit the restaurants altogether. Ha ha.

But he had been careless in certain moments. Too much strength shown, hands too freezing in their grip, eyes too bright and devoid of blinking. And, of course, there was his habit of the kukri. Always, always on his hip. That, his odd turns of health, and the unmissable change to hair and eyes all added up to some kind of oddity. But this was all a chaser to the initial surprise of his returning state. Silver-white streaks in the brunet mop, shadows branded in bloodshot eyes, and seemingly half his personality blasted out of his skull during some nameless nightmare spent in foreign forests and the care of a nuns’ hospital. Wary looks had found him at every corner as he clawed his way out of shock to go over the paperwork and preparation needed to be a partner…followed by suddenly becoming sole head and owner of the firm.

Being that his eyes worked excessively well of late, Jonathan had not been able to avoid his own telling look in the mirror. No matter how he practiced his smiles, how clean he was shaven, how smart the suit, he looked like Hell’s own errand boy. Again. Pretending he did not know this, he rubbed his searing eyes and ignored the sensation of a clock tick-tick-ticking down in his head, and muttered something hasty about:

“Ah, nothing so dire this time. Only I fear I haven’t been sleeping well.”

Or at all.

“But no rest for the wicked,” he’d attempted to laugh, feet already sidling him toward the office door. “The Sandman will simply have to make his appointment after Lord Brighton’s.” With that, he scurried out of range of any further looks or questions. He almost bolted the door. Instead, he made his usual cursory check—the frame and molding’s varied sigils and holy symbols still had their places etched stealthily into the woodwork. The mirror still hung at head-height by the door. Good. Good, good, good.

He arranged his desk so that Lord Brighton’s papers were set to one side, the few things he’d taken from the League to peruse—he may as well see if there was something more he could do if this seeming countdown proved to be a mere bout of paranoia—set to another, and the day’s newspaper on top of both. Impulse had drawn him to the day’s print, then ordered him to flip to the obituaries.

Derleth, Howard, passed at age 52. Admired professor of ethnologic and linguistic studies of America’s Miskatonic University,—

A prickle of recognition goaded him into circling the university’s name in pen. Beside it, he scratched a note: Possible coincidence, but mention to others.

—was found dead in his rooms at the Lillup Hotel, having apparently died in his sleep. He leaves behind many fond students and faculty.

That’s a lie.

How did he know?

Because you are what you are. For what little time is left to be such.

“What I am is tired and busy. No more, no less.”

It was less than convincing as a mantra, yet he stuck to it. At least until his eyes began to glaze over. Until the clock tolled louder, louder, louder in his head and his chest and that alien cellar that had carved itself out in his soul. Text swam and Charon held vigil at a river and he was so cold he could not feel it and oh, he wished he had left Mina more than a letter this morning, had kissed her cheek and lips another minute before he slunk away from her with all the guilt of a cheat, too afraid to wake her and be caught in her words and her love to leave, and couldn’t it all just stop for a moment, just a heartbeat to let him sleep and breathe and live as more than a cog crushed in the machinery of too many industrious works of men and monsters and madness beyond both, please, please, please—

There was a knock at the door.

“Mr. Harker?”

“You can come in, Robert,” he said as he shuffled the League’s heap of leads into a locked drawer. “And Jonathan’s still fine in here.”

You call this fine?

Robert ducked into the room looking like the picture of worry. He shut the door behind him and he too seemed to ponder sliding the bolt home. Instead he searched Jonathan’s face.

“I understand if you cannot give details. But has your,” his pitch lowered, “other vocation been wearing you down? Because you look…”

“Dead?” He watched Robert purse his lips. “I know. Thankfully, I’m not there yet. Too much to do. But since we’re on the topic—,”

“We aren’t—,”

“—you do know what arrangements have been made in the event that circumstances arise that might remove me from the picture? I know there is not as much history in place between us as others in our unique circles, comparatively speaking. But more than enough has happened in our short time together to make it…make it prudent that…”

His lips twitched up in what tried to be a grin and only managed a grimace.

“Jonathan, please, has something happened? Why are you talking like this?” He could hear as much plea in the other man’s voice to not hear the answer as much as to learn it. Mr. Holt’s life had been a deeply unhappy one with almost more losses than mere indignities. “Are you..?”

Tick. Tick. Tick.

“Have you been studying for the exam?” he got out steadily enough. “If you’re stuck on anything, remember not to be shy about going to Norton or Utterson. They seem the types to have more developed methods than my burn-at-both-ends regimen.”

“I—yes, I’ve been practicing.” Robert was at the desk now. “Jonathan. Has something happened?”

Not yet. Give it a quarter of an hour if this infernal internal clock has its way.

“No. Just keeping prepared. Making sure everything is up to date.”

“Yes, you mentioned as much before. Back when you made the second trip to Transylvania.” Jonathan had been fiddling with a pen. The pen nearly cracked. He set it down on the desk and folded his hands so he had something to grip without it breaking. “I’ll—I’ll go to the others if you won’t say. If they remain hushed, I’ll understand it’s a larger secret, and that I won’t pry at. I know enough to understand that even my nightmare was a frail thing compared to other horrors you’ve tromped through. But if I go to—to Utterson, or the Nortons, or to Mina,” Jonathan clutched his hands so hard the knuckles creaked, “and find they are just as in the dark, then I and everyone else will know you are hiding something. Some potentially fatal pain.” Robert’s pitch lowered again. “And I was given to understand that such things were barred from the League and its friends.”

“They are. But we aren’t in the League right now. And, supposing something was wrong, something I would not, could not share, do you doubt I’d have good reason to withhold it, Robert? Really, I might not even have a secret, fatal or otherwise. I could be imagining the whole thing. If I am, then I will gladly share the matter over lunch. If not?” Jonathan shrugged. “Then it will be a secret well-kept.”

“Jonathan—,”

“I believe Lord Brighton has just arrived.” This was as much intuition as distraction. He had the sense that strangers had entered the building a moment before some small murmur of greeting began its tremble through the space outside the office. “Would you show him in, please, Robert?”

Tick. Tick. Tick.

Robert Holt regarded him with a look that might have passed for stern if it was not so wounded by premonition. Jonathan tasted sickness at seeing it.

“…You will not be rid of me or this subject today.”

Jonathan did not correct him. Only waited until the door was between them again before he brought his clasped hands and his own temple together in the first true prayer he’d made since he began falsifying his deific pleas in that wretched traveler’s journal after that bloody October night.

God. If You give me nothing else in this life, give me peace. If what I feel today, now, is true, and this is when I end, take care of them all. They have given too much and saved too many for them to go without blessing. Protect them. Let them prosper. Let the devils worse than men or Hell can make be turned back into the shadows so that they may rest. My God, my true God, I do not even know if You are what answered me in those first horrid hours when life took its surreal turn. Did You save me? Did You burn the vampire’s hand and my love’s innocent brow? Did You make me this cold and killing Thing when I swore my soul as the bargain for Dracula’s end? Are You what whispers to me? I do not know. Perhaps I never will.

I will suffer that ignorance gladly in life and death if only You will do right by those I love. Mina, my Mina, she deserves it if no other.

Please.

Please.

Please.

Knock-knock.

“Lord Brighton and company to see you, Mr. Harker.” Robert’s voice, flattened into workplace cordiality. Jonathan scrubbed his face with both palms and sat up straight, smile pinned in place.

“Come in.”

The door opened. Three men walked in. With each face, Jonathan Harker became privy to a new certainty.

The first man was dressed as a gentleman of burgeoning middle age. He had the deaths of many a man, woman, and the occasional child stained in his palms and crusted under his nails. His latest was Professor Derleth, who had died in bed, but in no way asleep.

The second man was a richly wrapped specimen of elderly leather and ravenous eyes. In a hand heavy with jeweled and signet rings, he clutched a wrapped item, the size of a large book. It struck at some secret sense in Jonathan and appeared to dent the air around it like the point of a dull knife dimpling a throat.

The third man was not a man. It had never even been human, despite the face it wore. A face that smiled out at him from a familiar fanged mouth.

And from the mirror upon the wall.

“Make a move or raise your voice, and everyone in this building will suffer the consequences before you can brandish any weapon,” said the old man he took to be Lord Brighton. His murderer shut the door behind them all. Bolted it. “Do you doubt that, Mr. Harker?”

As the question hit the air, so did a sudden and horrendous ripple of awareness. A possibility that flickered on the edge of his consciousness like a candle guttering, unsure if it would be doused or not. The candle was the lives of every person in the building. And, he was sickened to feel, the hazier lives of those in the buildings bookending their own. He kept his hands on the desk and himself in his chair. Ice and bile slid down his throat.

“No,” Jonathan heard himself say. His attention hadn’t departed from the Thing wearing Count Dracula’s face. Nor had it looked away from him. Purest delight radiated from it—him?—and irrevocably stained the emotion with the filter of the unthinkable mind producing it. In the mirror, the red eyes burned away into a new color. The pupils boiled until they showed three lobes each.  

“Good. This business should conclude readily enough. Or, if the account I received proves even half true, the Count may take his time.” Lord Brighton ran his thumb along the spine of the wrapped parcel. Black velvet. “Apologies for the—,”

“No.” Jonathan spoke toward Brighton, but still his eyes did not move from the face of ‘Dracula.’ He realized with mounting alarm that he couldn’t, even when he tried. “No, we turned Dracula to dust.”

“And we put that dust back together. It was quite a simple maneuver, really.” The black velvet wrapping was peeled away with a showman’s eagerness. Something of pride was stitched through the overall miasma of anticipation coming off the old man. “Once you start reading the process walks you along itself.”

The velvet was tossed aside. From the corner of his frozen eye, Jonathan saw the book and felt a nauseous epiphany turn over in him. No, it was not The King in Yellow. But this tome had appeared more than once in the League’s more recent researches. Enough that Quincey had suggested a group make the trip to the grim little corner of Massachusetts where the Miskatonic University was supposed to have an unabridged copy of the blighted book in its library. There was little doubt now that the campus’ volume had been borrowed by its recently departed faculty member. Nor would it likely return to those shelves again.

The Necronomicon stared at him as plainly as the smiling Thing idling in the corner. If with less interest.

Inside him, time was ticking faster. Faster. Faster.

Against all hope, he had to ask, “You used that to call him here?”

“To call him to the killing ground where you so rudely ended a long and miraculous career of life beyond the shackles of nature? Yes.”

‘Dracula’ paused the stare to roll his eyes. In the mirror, he had far more than two to do so with. Albeit with far less skin.

“Shall I guess that the goal was a tradeoff for your own immortality?” The proud look curdled at the edges. “Don’t take offense. I’ve seen too many of you not to recognize the type by now. Nine out of ten self-serving idiots chasing the supernatural are doing it to give themselves a longer life span, or power, or both.” Because he hadn’t looked away, because he could not look away, he addressed the summoned party. “Is that what you promised him?”

The sharp teeth bared another giddy inch.

“Yes. A promise I shall keep in exchange for all his arduous labor. It is the least I can do after he has brought me here to my good friend, so that we might finally catch up on lost time.”

“I must give you credit,” Jonathan managed around the boulder of dread growing in his chest. “You do a fine impression.”

“As fine as it needs to be.” The grin grew again. It showed too much. Something slithered behind the prison bars of spindle teeth. “At least for your sake.”

“I’m going.” This came from the man who had been silent since entering the room. A greenish hue traced the lines of a face that seemed wholly unused to anything resembling discomfort. Jonathan realized he’d kept his head ducked the entire time, refusing to risk looking at the Thing in Dracula’s skin. “Do what you’re going to do, but I’m not staying. I’m not.” He turned to the door.

“Davies,” said Brighton.

Mr. Davies’ hand was on the knob. He fumbled a sweating moment with it, having forgotten about the bolt.

“Davies—,” Brighton grated again, then stopped.

A white hand was suddenly resting on Mr. Davies’ shoulder. The man froze as if nails were driven through both feet. Still, he knew better than to look.

“It’s quite fine,” said Dracula’s voice. “But I must tell you something before you go.” Jonathan watched the lips move as if mouthing something in mute pantomime. He heard nothing, but felt as if something were crawling just beneath the level of his senses, an insectile squirming that trundled over him in a wide and pointless detour before turning to burrow into Mr. Davies’ skull. Even with his back to him, Jonathan could tell the final fibers of nerve had rotted away like old silk. Davies’ head trembled on the thick neck, shaking in frantic negation.

“No. Please, no. I-I wasn’t part of this. I was never part of this!”

“Oh, but you were. You are. It is an unseemly thing to disregard the people who get the job done for their master. Besides, it is as little to me as your vocation has been to you. Even if it has always operated in the opposite direction. No need for thanks.” The abomination in the mirror laughed with every mouth it had. “You are most welcome.”

Mr. Davies made a small high noise in reply, scrabbling at the lock with sweat-greased fingers. He’d barely undone the bolt before he froze again. This time with a spasming shudder. Alarm shot up Jonathan’s spine and reflex made him try to stand—only to find himself locked down in his chair. There was not even the nicety of a strained muscle allowed. In every inch, every nerve and bone, he was as set and immobile as a doll. A doll with a mechanism inside. Tick, tick, ticking.

Nearly there. Nearly done.

Mr. Davies jerked and twisted as rosy foam gurgled and bled up from his mouth. His hands clawed at throat and chest while the whites of his eyes showed all the way around, rolling frantically to Lord Brighton. Lord Brighton furrowed his brow in either confusion or irritation as the man buckled to his knees. An entire disappointed moue formed as Mr. Davies wasted the last of his energy on reaching for his employer’s trouser leg. Lord Brighton stepped nimbly back as the hand fell limp.

Then Mr. Davies was dead. Cooling and drooling into the rug.  

No. No, that’s wrong. His life is still present. It’s stretching out and away into the future. He must be having a fit. He should come out of it…

Yet Mr. Davies continued to cool. All semblance of life and its animal spark was already faded out of his eyes. The latter had rolled up to gawp at Jonathan in that final spasm. Blind, they still seemed to see. Dead, the man still seemed to plead.

There is no ‘seem.’ He’s there. You know he’s there.

Jonathan did. Jonathan could still do nothing. Just sit and stare and wait.

Say something! Call for someone! You can still talk!

And what could he say? What would shouting to the sane world outside the room do except to turn a potential massacre into certainty?

“Well, that is a pity,” Lord Brighton huffed. “But I suppose I wouldn’t have required his services beyond nudging the more menial pen pushers and porters going forward. On that note, Count, I feel it is prudent that we turn to business. There is only so much time before some pest at the door comes in to nag Mr. Harker about some trivial matter and there is mess enough to consider with Mr. Davies—,”

“You truly cannot help yourself, can you?” Dracula’s voice hummed. His eyes, in his head and in the glass and in the shadows growing dense as ink about the room, crept on Jonathan like centipedes. “You see how he can’t, don’t you? Who was that fellow in the ramble that would-be detective fed you? The storyteller was Dyson, who took the telling from a sad rag of a man named Selby—there was something about a hand in red chalk…”

“Sir Thomas Vivian,” Jonathan murmured. Tick. Tick. Tick. Down to heartbeats now. Make them last. “The royal family doctor who tried to kill his friend over buried treasure in the hills.”

“Ah, yes. How did it go?” The voice of Count Dracula changed abruptly to an unknown middle-aged timbre, one of affected upper class tone: “‘Let us talk of business matters, Selby.’” The following laugh was the Count’s, likewise the voice after it, though both were laced with something new. Something that crawled. “He was rich as sin as well. Too dense to consider anything but getting more gold, accursed and inhumanly wrought as it was. Went for his poor companion’s throat without half a thought, not thinking for an instant about the flint blade his friend had just revealed as his proof of discovery. Oh, greed. It does something to the intellect as much as the soul, I think. That and too much inbreeding among certain branches of nobility. It eats a hole through the already pitiful granule your sad lot call a brain. All they can fathom is themselves. The only importance of the future is how much more gratification might exist for them there. Tedious in the extreme and gluttonous to the point of idiocy.”

At all this, Lord Brighton had managed to grow some irate roses in his shriveled face. His leathern fingers gripped the Necronomicon tighter.

“Not so idiotic that I cannot undo what’s been done, Count. Derleth gave us that much.”

“Before you murdered him,” Jonathan put in. “Right? You couldn’t risk him returning the borrowed book. There is a chance he told you the truth, supposing he didn’t suspect your intentions. There is twice as much chance he fed you a lie as he put the obvious together, leaving behind a spring trap to bring some worse horror on your head. Or the head of whatever sacrificial reader you might try to bribe or coerce into action. But neither option matters. You already damned yourself and everyone else the moment you opened the door to him. Whatever he is.”

Lord Brighton turned his frown on Jonathan.

“What are you on about?”

“He is not Count Dracula.” He fought his voice as he said it, urging it not to shake here, at the last moment. Fought harder not to believe the words that would leave him now, true as they and all their portents were: “He’s a god.”

A knot of fear and revulsion twisted in his stomach as the room’s air flexed. Bristling the way a cat will when it’s pleased. Jonathan tasted his heart and his breakfast rising up when this was joined by a final laugh. Every light in the office and the sunlight in the window stained at the noise.

“That I am. But let us not torment the poor supporting maggot any longer. He does not care for such things either way. All he wants is his candy and all I want is to stop having him in the room. So.” The god that was not Dracula stood from his seat—

Tick-tick-tick—

—and turned a bored smile on Lord Brighton. His roses had wilted again to something clammier.

“When you appear to Ellison down the line, do give him my best wishes. As best you can, anyway. It shall be hard enough work attempting to scream.”

“Wh—,” was as far as Lord Oliver Quentin Brighton got before he vanished. The god sighed in Dracula’s voice, the very essence of relief.

“Finally.”

“Where is he?” Jonathan asked, not wanting to know. But he wanted the next moment to happen even less.

Tickticktick.

“Do you recall the account of the Dreamlands? The little escapade Miss Pleasance and some gaggle of others passed through once upon a time?”

“Yes.” The word barely rose above a whisper. His attention was stuck on the alteration of the god’s eyes. All pretense of simple red had burned away from them. They did not blink as he strolled around the desk and bent down to Jonathan’s shoulder.

“The underside of that. He will live there now, solid and eternal. Well, I say solid,” Jonathan winced as a claw like an obsidian spade grew from the white hand’s thumbnail and slit first his tie, then his shirt collar open, “but he’s more on the viscid side.” In a sing-song lilt, he elaborated, “A great soft jelly thing. Smoothly rounded, with no mouth, with pulsing white holes filled by fog where eyes used to be. Rubbery appendages that were once arms; bulks rounding down into legless humps of soft slippery matter. He will leave a moist trail when he moves. Blotches of diseased, evil gray will come and go on his surface, as though light is being beamed from within.”

Ticktickticktickticktick—

“Why?”

The shirt collar was folded down and away.

“Why what?”

“Why are you doing this? Why are you wearing him?”

“I figured you would appreciate a familiar face over one of my others. A personal touch, you know. Even this is for quaintness’ sake. I can feel your memories as they turn over in there.” The spade nail tapped Jonathan’s brow. “A little picture book flipping through its pages. It was this side of the throat he went for, yes?”

“Don’t—,”

But the teeth were already in his neck. Where he had not felt Dracula’s bite when it found him that night in June, this one came with a feeling worse than pain. The theft of blood seemed only cursory while something else, far deeper and more integral than flesh, screeched and thrashed against invasion. Jonathan thought dismally of a blind and groping hive sinking into the folds of his mind, building colonies and turning over the paraphernalia of his life with awful feelers. He would rather take Dracula a hundred times over. A thousand.

Instead he could only sit and bleed and choke—and worse. Think of Mina. His mind fled to her as it always did in its worst throes. The eternal safety blanket, clung to whenever some bleak end seemed near, good-bye, good-bye, hide in her, say farewell, last thought, last want, last prayer.

Mina-love-you-Mina-so-sorry-Mina-God-God-God-let-her-know-that-let-her-be-safe-be-happy-God-please-Mina—

“I’m right here, Jonathan, I heard you the first time.” The mouth had come away from his throat, now glazed in red. A tongue like the hide of a lamprey licked the dribble away. “The true first time. Not your desperate little session before the door opened. No. We go such a long way back. Even before the night you swore your soul to send your little bogeyman to Hell.” As Dracula’s face began to contort into a grotesque parody, Jonathan felt a burst of sensory recall—a forest in the dark, the cackle-chase of mist that meant to fall on him with thirsty teeth, pain and hunger and fever and a sunrise that was an infinity away—and remembered, against all desire, the particulars of the denser nightmare that followed.

For it had followed a prayer. Rather, a trade disguised as a prayer. The words were lost to him, but the intent was there. The want.

Help. (Me.) Help. (Mina.) Help. (Victims.) Help, help, help. (And I will give all I can and all I am, whatever that is worth to You. Please.) Help.

“I heard. I answered. And our departed matchmaker’s playing with forces older than the universe has made for a most convenient reunion. Better still, a chance to check off one of infinite chores, and collect what is owed.” Jonathan watched and choked on a mounting scream as the god undid his own shirt before driving the spade claw into his breast. The skin split open, but the ichor that poured from it was not blood. What should had been a wound changed instantaneously into a breathing maw. Teeth chittered. Pieces squirmed. The ichor, a tar that slithered and bubbled as if alive—for it was—peered with eyeless eagerness at Jonathan’s mouth. “Best of all, we can address the missed opportunities of the past. It was all petty good fun when he saw to your woman first. But I think we both know who was still at the top of his list for this.” A hand that was no longer a hand clamped onto the back of Jonathan’s head. “Say ah.”

He bit back against the command. Even against the howl that clawed against the back of his teeth. It did not help.

Tick.

The ichor found its way between pursed lips. Muscle worse than a tongue worked open his jaw. Jonathan did not drink so much as drown in the flood that crawled its way to mouth and throat and all the roads of flesh beyond. His one solace was the fact of his dying. The room faded as he did. Away, away, until all but he and the god remained. As even this winked out, the god was present enough to make his laugh heard.

Tick.

“Jonathan Harker. My friend, my fodder. You should know better than most—death is not the end. It never has been. Death is where we start.”

The world and the vampire decomposed into an endless crawling black. It sprawled. It swirled. It was a single three-lobed pupil set against the cosmic inferno of an iris with no edges at all. Jonathan Harker knew himself for less than a mote before its vision. The fragment of an atom. Yet it saw him just the same.

“Come,” said a voice with no mouth. “We have so much to do.”

The pupil swallowed him.

Tick.

And he was gone.

 At least until he woke in the castle. Not that he would understand it was a castle upon opening his eyes. There was too much space and what angles were perceivable in the ugly stone hurt to look at too long. He might have been in some titanic cavern mouth near the sea. Brine and alien odors burned his nose. Somewhere, things swam and gibbered and croaked their fealty or fear. Likely both.

But somewhere far closer, a mountain turned over in his sea-salted sleep.

Close enough that the turning trembled the enormous cathedral of rock and rattled the air with the thought-hum of drowsing.

Not drowsing. Dead.

Jonathan Harker shuddered like a struck tuning fork under the weight of this groggy clarification. It was helped only slightly by the fact that he still hadn’t turned his head to try and look upon the monolith in the dark. There was not nearly enough gloom to hide the sight of him—for it was a him, and he was another god—and the gradual adjustment of his eyes to the greenish moonlight dribbling in past the towers and edges of a Cyclopean city beyond the castle only improved his sight for the worst. It traced more and more detail in the black, making him want to squeeze his eyes shut and scurry back to the brief oblivion he'd left behind.

Look.

No, he thought. Then, to test if his mouth still worked:

“No.”

You will look or I will consume you and let you spend the next millennium as a cyst in my third stomach.

Jonathan turned over on his side and looked. He was heartened somewhat. Compared to the thing that had worn Dracula’s husk, it was a far duller mental agony to look on this new-ancient member of a pantheon he had no desire to name. This god had forsaken the looming post of his perch-throne to rest upon the floor and his bed of sponge and slime. Jonathan thought abstractly of the cephalopods Nemo and Aronnax were wont to describe with dual awe and respect. The head, which was the size of a town square, reminded him of a bloated octopus whose eyes had drifted slightly to face forward in an unpleasantly humanoid glower. Growing from that was a likewise distended body that mirrored something of a gargoyle, complete with the shrugged and folded wings that draped like a membranous blanket over one side.

One of the tentacles that made up the face’s lower half uncurled to point down at him.

You are Jonathan Harker.

“Yes. Is it safe to—to know your name, sir?”

No. It is Cthulhu.

The name squirmed uncomfortably until it was rooted permanently in his mind. Then it fell asleep.

“Am I dead?”

Yes. To die is to dream and you are in mine.

“Why?”

To take a message.

“What message? Who for?”

Cthulhu told him. There were no words, yet the dictation was taken in full and excruciating detail. Jonathan thought his head, dead as it was, might still pop with collecting the full weight of it. By the time the god was finished, Jonathan Harker was bent double on the slick floor, willing his brain not to drip out of his ears. He willed harder that the presence groping idly through his skull would recede. It had already delivered the message and was now loitering in the cramped labyrinth of his mind the way a body will putter around in the workplace rather than returning straight to a task at counter or desk. Suckers were prying up the boards of his childhood and claws scratched the paint off his adolescence so freshly and strangely budding to adulthood. He almost screamed aloud as boneless limbs peeled open the chronology of his life and turned over the howling core-light of the soul.

The god hummed. The god retracted himself, leaving Jonathan wheezing and weeping on the grime of the stone floor. The god’s glare did not so much soften as adjust some minute increment further from aggravation. The god watched as Jonathan stumbled up first to his knees, then his feet, his hands only just loosening the hopeless cradle they’d made for his pale brow.

That is all there is of importance.

“Alright—,” the word choked him. How strange to think he could choke while dead. “Alright. I-I’ll just—yes. Must go. Now.”

Yes. Gods be with you, Jonathan Harker.

“Thank you?”

Do not. It is only fact.

So it was.

In the time to come, beyond R’lyeh and its dead waters, past the Dreamlands and its edgeless borders, in the mystic dark that was the truer space under the skin of Panicked forests, hills, and caves, throughout the black-starred kingdoms tattered and Yellow, and in chthonic and cosmic dimensions yet further, Jonathan Harker would find himself in the company of many gods. They and their adjacent wonders and horrors.

The first, the last, the worst, and the most constant of which being the vampiric mimic who was waiting for him at the black-green ridge of the city and the start of the teeming obsidian ocean. He still smiled with Dracula’s lips, though the shine of his eyes was the obscener truth; fluid and flaming.

In one of his hands was an elaborately bound itinerary book. A pen that appeared to be a tiny calcified alien figure balanced daintily in the other.

“What was the message?”

“You—,”

Killed me, stole me—

“—heard him too.” He tasted the truth as he said it. He tasted more of loathing, but that was tamped back down and away.

“Yes. But I am asking you what he said.”

“It wasn’t all for you.”

“I’d expect not. For a career slugabed, he always has some complaint to make concerning something disturbing his nap and the nap he dreams about within it. The stars are not right for me to be asking him what time he means to herald anything more harrowing than a few creatives’ sea-salted nightmares, he says. The maggots on land are seeding progeny who will one day use their boats and drills to hunt for oils and aggravate him as an upstairs neighbor’s stomping and banging will, he says. Dagon’s grandchildren keep swimming up to knock at the castle and paddle away laughing, he says. Always something and always with a wide range of parties to deliver complaints to. For my part, I only care what idle chat was directed at me. The rest,” he flapped the hand with the pen in Jonathan’s direction, “well, that is for you to see about. So. What did he have to say to me, my friend?”

“There weren’t any words. Not to any of it.”

“Mmhmm?” The tone of a governess encouraging a toddler through his ABCs.

“He says one of your sons has been weaving in and out of here and Earth’s waters. The one like a sea serpent, born in your time haunting the Vikings. While teething, the venom was enough to make him rot and shed two sets of limbs before he ripped out one of the fangs and stabbed him with it. Both appear put out, but he wants you to set your son elsewhere.”

Sighing, the god in the vampire skin scratched something down in his book.

“Well, that is a good mark for you and a tedious one for me. The entitled slab of gelatin doesn’t recognize play when it swims up and bites him. My spawn is an endlessly growing boy, after all. Do tell him I’ll see what I can do about relocation as soon as he sees about throwing his poor pet cultists a little scrap or two of acknowledgment. He’s been ignoring them the past few centuries and the dithery pests are starting to pull at my apron strings.”

“What—,”

“You will want to take note.” Jonathan Harker found himself holding his own ledger and pen. “The pages are infinite, but I assure you, this will fast seem insignificant to all the dictation it must hold up to. I would recommend one of the crystal lenses the architects are playing with in the Land of Muse, but I wouldn’t want to overwhelm you. Oh. And you will need something better than this.”

Between one instant and the next, Jonathan’s kukri vanished from his hip and appeared in the god’s hand. He watched as the steel was sunk into the god’s trunk, failing to pierce through to the other side. When the blade was unsheathed, the metal pulsed blackly for a long beat—at least until the steel drank in whatever stain it was.

“I am inside you as deep as a god can go. Well.” He rolled his shoulders in a shrug that revealed the edges of his hair to be alive with tendrils. They appeared to make faces at him. “Very nearly. It is my mark and it will be satisfactory enough to most, though there are bound to be nuisances that shall need sterner addressing than courteous mien and a poke with the pen. There is experience enough to see you through either dealing.” He whirled his hand and the kukri was sheathed again. It hung heavier on Jonathan’s hip and seemed almost magnetized to him. Less a weapon than a limb. It was unpleasantly pleasant. “I do not doubt that you will manage.”

“Manage what? Why am I here? Why did you—,”

The god’s borrowed face split open on a grin that threatened to shuck the whole disguise like pale leather.

“Kill you? Amusement was part of it, I confess. A large part. But it was also the simplest way to set you upon the next step of your illustrious career path. Before you claim shock or make false cries of modesty, know that I know you. All of what you have been and done, what you will be and do. Time is so much putty—and vapor and river and ice, as well. To say nothing of the unvarnished bauble of your spirit. You positively blister the eye with your extremes. When you are good, you are very, very good. But when you are mad you are perfect. For our needs, at least.” The monstrous leer reset into human parameters. He snapped his book shut and let it dissolve into smoke. “That said, I did hear all Cthulhu had to say to you. You comprehended what he divulged and did not buckle under the weight of his intent. Just afraid enough to savor, but professional enough to maintain yourself. Earth has been good practice on that front.

“But now you are here to pay what is owed. What luck that all I ask is that you do what comes naturally. Accommodation, solicitation, and the solving of troubles that, frankly, I do not feel like troubling myself with. Bringing messages hither and thither, seeing that issues are addressed as civilly or viscerally as they require. I shall check in with you and your progress as you toddle on…”  

Jonathan was only half-listening. Supreme revulsion had forced his attention to split between the false Dracula and any direction that did not contain him. This led to his gaze snagging on another figure. It drifted slowly atop the water, stamping the waves to stillness as the ebon of its low boat glided near R’lyeh’s edge. What teeming things had raised their heads in curiosity now ducked away, hiding lambent lidless eyes in the depths. The boatman, if that was what it was, cut just as recognizable a silhouette as the god nattering before him.

Tall, slim, hooded. Hands of bone upon the single oar.

Cold radiated from them like heat came off the sun.

“Ah, but I’m rambling! Come, I will not be responsible for ruining your punctual streak. You cut the Transylvanian wilderness down to a mere jog on corporeal terrain. We must do better here.”

Before Jonathan could tell him to wait—indeed, before he could convince himself that any plea would pause or salvage anything now—the god waved his hand and they were both gone from the un-sunken city. Now they stood in the benighted maw of a hollow that crossed soils with that of a place in Wales, not too distant from land with names like ‘Grey Hills’ and ‘Caermaen.’ Pallid shapes slithered and walked and trilled and sang and danced and unspooled. They remembered him far more fondly than Jonathan recalled them and their insistent welcome. Likewise for the horned god that allowed themselves to be called Pan, watching with eyes made of bough and stone and phantasm.

Waiting.

“Oh, they have missed you. Dear Dr. Raymond would squeal to stand where you do now.”

Dr. Raymond would scream if he stood in front of me, muttered a kneejerk hate in him. Or Van Helsing, for that matter. It was too close a thing with Seward and that damned ‘surgery.’ Far, far too close. Should never have let him slip away…

“You say I’m here to take messages. To—to solve the troubles of gods and their acolytes.”

“Ah, see? There you go being polite. You may call them what they are. Sycophants, lickspittles, accidents made with the local mortal meat, occasional deific dandruff…”

“Whatever you may call them, I am meant to,” Jonathan gestured helplessly with the strange notebook, “what? Play secretary? Attendant?”

“Messenger.” The voice rippled and sent the pale denizens in the gloom scurrying back. Jonathan still shivered as he had while alive, back when he felt the slime-glazed flick of some extended limb recoil from where it had grazed the back of his head. Perhaps it was the same member of the so-called ‘Little People’ he had to wrestle himself from before he could be dragged underground to stay. “Only a messenger, Jonathan Harker, just as I am the Messenger. A message can be delivered in many ways and the problems encased in them can be addressed with as much variety. Or, if you are simply not in the mood, as I so frequently am not, you can leave it to their judgment. True, their judgment usually comes with a significant body count, but only with such lives that are scarcely a blink in the great temporal scheme of things.”

“Cthulhu, he mentioned…he gave me things to tell people I can no longer reach. Not like this.”

“I know. They are negligible. Which is really just another word for mortal. They shall get around to dying in their own time and you can share your intel then. Unless,” the mask of Dracula melted like tallow, the features eagerly warping into truer shapes, “you wish to have them sent ahead early. Perhaps they shall find their way here. If you like, I can open the way to your widow in just a—,”

“No!” The old pain of misery simmered in him, but thinly. Just as the tears that stung his eyes were dulled. They were not real. They were not part of anything living, but a memory of living. The breath that hitched in him was there only out of habit. “No. Please, no. I’ll do it.”

“Jonathan, you would do it if I tipped an entire continent down my gullet and used England to pick my teeth. The courtesy of familiar company is only that. I’ve no need for threats with you.” He pointed at Jonathan’s middle. A horrendous writhing twitched to life in him and teased at the phantom of bones in his spectral anatomy. Puppet strings rooted within rather than to the clumsy exterior of joints. “Dracula is in Hell. You sent him there with your own blessed hand. You are most welcome. Now get to work.”

  In Pan’s domain, Jonathan Harker turned to face the Little and the White and the Demi People of this and many gods of Nature and Supernature, his book in hand. The People had much to say. As with the dreaming god of the sea, he wondered at how they expected him to deliver half their insistent sibilant notes in his condition, but considering how they reckoned time and their own loose grip upon humanity’s reality, they must have imagined he would wait until all the relevant parties had passed away for him to share their topics of discussion. Perhaps he would.

Meanwhile, he took note of what things might be carried to other entities presumably in reach. There was some dispute of territory with the gnoles aboveground and another with the ghouls below it.

True ghouls. Tunneling. Teeth full of death snapping at those below. Flesh rots and flesh dies. Growing back from the dying annoys us.

“There are worse things,” he murmured aloud. Inwardly:

Assault. Abduction. Sending your admirer with a medical license to spike the chemical suppliers with your ritual powders to turn victims into monsters against their will.

The doctor Arthur Raymond had no orders, the Great God Pan rumbled in his head. Only a fantasy.

“And the rest? What reason do you have for attacking and stealing people as you do in the living world?”

This world lives too. This world is lonesome. My Mary is here. Mine. Our Helen comes and goes, as you saw. Dies and lives as spring will do. The man Villiers learned the hard way. She wants, she wants. She only went through her lovers to find one who would stay after she showed them the truth. After she gave them a night of changing as our flesh changes. None died by her hand, but by theirs. They would not stay for her after. Few do. They do not understand. You do not understand.

“I understand that you never ask. You take. You violate. There is no life or will or want in the world that you and yours consider equal or greater than your own. For all your uncanny makeup, all your madness and marvels, your habits seem no different from any other empire or rapist, apart from the nuance of more surreal consequences.”  

Such is Nature. Such is Supernature.

“If a dog can understand ‘yes and no,’ so should a god.”

You’re wasting breath you don’t have. Go.

Jonathan closed the book and turned to climb up out of the hollow. He tried not to notice the brushing of wondering digits on his head and back and legs. One hand went to the kukri. The digits retreated.

You will see to the gnoles. You will see to the ghouls. There will be retribution otherwise.

“I will do what I can.” Whatever that would be.

And the others. Those upon Earth. You will tell them what needs knowing.

…If I can. The Dreamlands seem the only course.

Mina flickered in his mind again. Her face distraught. He hoped she would dream where he could find her—but the hope was thin.

Jonathan stepped up and away, following the instinct-pull of a messenger’s route that towed him toward the groves of the gnoles. To work, to work.

 In a black-green sea, the figure upon the low slim boat turned the oar in their skeletal hands. Patient, if irate. A scale-girt face peeked up at them. Cataracts glazed the fish eyes. Memories of manhood and dry land had not been drowned in all the centuries between now and the shore. Please, could they..?

The figure pointed at the spot between the wide-spaced eyes.

A moment later, the corpse floated. A moment after that, kinsmen swam up to collect and consume him goodbye.

The figure threw two coins into the waves and pushed the oar once more.

 This took hours.

This took days.

This took months.

This took years.

This took all time and none at all.

 But in practical terms, this all took just long enough for Robert Holt to worry. To wonder at the shout of a stranger and the scrabbling at Jonathan Harker’s office doorknob from the inside. To call through the door and hear no answer. To finally, miserably, open the door.

And scream.

 In the time it took for Mr. Bentley and a throng of younger fellows to come running, Jonathan Harker had already met with the gnoles, delivered and received messages of matching bile, and began making suggestions. If the matter was one of territory and trees, could they not solve the matter by way of a neutrally impervious border? No one side could snatch forest from the other if there was a genius loci between them. Death was, if not a harrowing deterrent for the parties involved, a sure irritant. To die and undie was a loathsome process. Sowing one of the more viciously solitary land spirits along the terrain of dispute would ward off the encroaching Folk on either side the way the presence of a buzzing hornet nest attached to a fence would steer away wanderers on Earth.

There was much chittering and trilling and grudging hisses from them as much as Pan’s myriad Folk. It was as close to an acquiescing tone as either party could manage.

By the time Mr. Bentley and the rest reached the office and found Robert trying to find a pulse or a breath on Mr. Harker’s corpse, as well as Lord Brighton’s companion dead on the rug, Jonathan Harker had spent two years learning how to sow a genius loci himself, as neither side—including the one with a god—deigned to lay it in place themselves. The result was an entity that passed for a brambleberry shrub. A thing of fruit and blossoms and thorns and faces glowering from its leaves. As an experiment, one of the White People and one of the gnoles dared to pluck berries from their respective sides; this, after two other volunteers had to be whipped and thorned and blood-siphoned to bone as a distraction.

Screams, contortions, and an explosive growth of new prickly shrubs from their flesh ensued. Their soul-bodies limped hurriedly away from the roots, and did their best to join their fellows in cheering over the success as they reconstituted. Jonathan Harker made a note of this and then followed his feet to the ghouls. A far easier reception, as he had acquired some good feeling from his work with Aurelia and her matrons. They even had a manifesto describing their reasoning ready and waiting for him on a scroll:

BUNCH OF CHEATERS DOWN THERE. WE SMELL DEAD FLESH? WE’RE COMING TO DINNER. THEY WANT TO DIG INTO OUR CATACOMBS? THEY CAN BE DINNER. SIMPLE AS THAT.

“That is fairly simple. I can tell them so, but I doubt that will settle the trouble itself. I take it they started it?”

“That they did,” one of the more human-shaped members gurgled. “Get in everywhere like weeds. Tried to conscript old Erichtho herself with that potion of theirs. She quaffed and killed it. Filled the guilty party with extinct insect eggs from half-past the dinosaurs and resurrected them all at once. Had us a good laugh. But they are grabby buggers whereas we take what comes natural. Always more life, so there’s always more dead. Circle of supper. We’d keep ourselves to ourselves if it weren’t for them nosing into our crypts looking for more pits. That’s both here and in the meaty corporeal demesne, for your record. Greedy pricks.”

The ghoul spat gristle while her companions gibbered and snarled in agreement. Jonathan took note.

“Would it help if they detoured to more,” he gestured lightly at the surrounding emptied caskets and their half-eaten contents, “livelier ground?”

“Oh, detours have naught to do with it. They have plenty of ground to play with in the liminal domains. Trouble is they think everything subterranean is theirs to call. It’ll be quite a time once those subway trains come into fashion, I guarantee that. Bastards won’t even leave a footbridge alone if they see some pretty young thing trip-tapping on their lonesome. They can go on forever, so they won’t steer away from the latest fancy unless something’s there to slap their hand. Tentacle. Whatever. Us giving them a little dose of necrosis to go with their regrowth act is us giving them that slap.”

“I just had to deal with a similar issue with the gnoles. Apparently, they were the encroaching party in that one. There’s too much real estate squabbling aboveground even for Pan’s People to lay claim to all of it without trouble. Is there anyone else with investment in underground territory? A neutral party that might be worth deferring to or..?”

The ghoul’s lips quivered up and back from a doggish grin.

“Aye. An older sort. Was kicking long before Their Horned Majesty of Stolen Milkmaids and Herded Shepherds was ever seeding satyrs around Greece or the Isles. Poked his head up a while back to jab that dreary American’s dreams for a poem, I think, but he ducked on down again. He has his work to do, same as Pan and their gardening and mystic maintenance, but doesn’t go around using it as an excuse to be an eldritch ass. Get him involved and I reckon the Folk will find themselves quite disinterested in expanding into occupied real estate. Only trouble is getting him to squirm up and into our mess. Busy fellow, he is.”

“Who is he?”

The ghouls told him. Jonathan managed to not make a face. Then asked for directions.

Four years passed. Robert Holt shook and held Jonathan Harker’s corpse, while Mr. Bentley sent two coworkers flying out to get a doctor and the police, as, with the timing known only to a nightmare, Mina Harker came rushing into the building, something was wrong, wrong, wrong, she had dreamt it asleep and felt it awake, and where was he, please, please, where was Jonathan?

As it turned out, Jonathan Harker was following the cathedral dimensions of the tunnels left behind by a Conqueror of great and grisly pedigree. It took some time to find him, as he was a fellow constantly on the move, and when he was found it took almost as long to clamber up to his front end. Already being dead, Jonathan had no trouble holding an audience with him. There was no life or meat on him to bother with, or so the Conqueror wordlessly informed him.

It was a more cordial meeting than Jonathan might have expected. Something to do with his work in Transylvania. The erasure of Dracula had put himself and Quincey Morris in some good graces for those of the Conqueror’s like. Likewise his choice of patron. What was it he needed, young man?

Jonathan explained. The Conqueror detoured.

It transpired that new routes were established which crossed ghoulish and Sidhe territories alike. Among several others. These routes were unique in that they were stamped with the passing of that oldest, the most unassuming, the most all-consuming of reapers, the Worm. Eater of plant and animal and god, fertilizer of life. Yes, it was preferred that the consumed be decaying before it passed into the unfathomable maw, but not a strict requirement. Certainly not for those who rejuvenated and resurrected themselves willy-nilly to begin with.

Which was to say, if any Folk thought it worth the gamble, they could try and breach other underworlds’ domains for conscription if they liked—but only if they were prepared to risk going whole and alive into the gullet for the next thirty years only to be excreted as sentient soil. Flowers would ensue. Likewise for the ghouls.

The Folk sulked away from the tunnels. The ghouls toasted each other with goblets of bodily swills and embalming fluid. Jonathan declined his own.

“Suit yourself, lad. What is it your sort take, anyway?”

“My sort?”

“By way of pay, that is. The running bit is that its coins on the eyes, but that’s just a matter of travel. Or does your boss handle all that?”

“What do you—,”

He was gone.

“—mean?”

The catacombs of the ghouls had given way to, of all places, a theater. On stage was a slim and handsome young man. Between blinks he was either black or a man-shaped chasm with a grin of lunatic stars. His eyes gave him away as the Messenger. He was idly breaking down a number of scientific apparatuses and loading them into cases that evaporated as they were packed.

“They are a surprisingly companionable group, as carrion collectors go,” he said as he fiddled with a device that spewed a crystal-clear light projection of an apocalyptic vista upon the wall behind him. “Very community-minded. I imagine they assumed I was not giving you your due.” The projection switched off as the depicted city caught ablaze and the last living citizens wailed and charred and changed in its green light. “I am many things, but cheap is never one of them. Especially not when a maggot does more than simply entertain. You, Jonathan Harker, have the honor of being promoted to caterpillar. Congratulations. Sadly, you missed the audience.”

Jonathan took a reflexive step back as the god stepped off the stage and his foot landed on a discarded pamphlet. In a print he did not recognize, on paper that did not yet exist, the font declared:

SEE THE FUTURE LAID BARE! SCIENCES THAT REVEAL THE BONES OF SPACE AND TIME! HE TOURS FROM FURTHEST EGYPT TO NEAREST METROPOLIS! COME AND BEHOLD THE WONDERS OF NYARLATHOTEP!

The city named for the event was one nestled in what the Americans had dubbed New England. The date was set in November of 1920.

“Oh, never mind that. This little show wasn’t for your Earth. Not even the display outdoors.” The Messenger shrugged into a smart traveling suit whose make seemed tailored to a different era and strolled up and past Jonathan in the aisle. The horrid rooted grasp in his core yanked Jonathan along until he matched the god’s stride. “There are so many parallel playgrounds to visit, you see. For this one,” the doors of the building swung open on the benighted desolation of city and street and sanity where growths groaned, cement mouths wailed with shrieks and laughter, and a gulf in the countryside yawned all the way to the throbbing nucleus of the universe, “I turned the clock forward on my latest spectators. Can you guess what they called me? Among the other epithets that jump to mind upon seeing too much melanin and intelligence in the same place, that is.”

“Pharaoh.” The word came to mind and mouth on impulse. In that moment it seemed as obvious to him as math. The Messenger affected a preening stance.

“On occasion I am.” The handsome young man suddenly dissolved into a more familiar frame. Jonathan tried to put more distance between himself and the returned guise, but Dracula’s hand sank like a claw into his shoulder. “Though I am happy to change costumes for company’s sake. No, the name was an insult and the insult was an unforgivable one, for it was not even true. I will suffer many cries of hate and horror if they are earned, but this! They called me a fraud! A toymaker playing with static electricity and film tricks! It could not stand. So I sent them to this future, where they could be introduced to the truth of my predictions. Which, I will confess, were rigged—they were promises more than anything. Less an oracle huffing vapor than an architect revealing his blueprints. Mind your step.”

Jonathan jumped as a hand—what used to be a hand—scrabbled for his ankle. It grew out of a length of tendon and sinew that was once an arm, but was now a mere umbilical stretching from the fungal heap attached to one of many blasted ruins. The eyes in that mass were many and pleading. He thought inexplicably of Mr. Davies. The kukri itched at his hip and cold twitched in his hands. He had to do something. He needed to—

“Ah-ah,” he was tugged back in line by gut and grip, “leave them be. They are not your concern.”

It is. It must be someone’s.

“Why would you do this? What point is there to inflicting all this?”

The Dracula mask turned grave as the eyes burned.

“Would you believe it was by necessity?”

“No. No, I would not. You are too powerful to have any true need for preying on innocents of any world in this way.” Jonathan swallowed dryly. Again, so odd in a throat that had no need for it. “You did this because you wanted to.”

“Not just me. Cthulhu and the broader brigade of the Old, the Great, and the Outer gods have their stamp on all of this too. As they will in other dimensions. As they already have in other worlds. But you are not far from the truth. Now comes the next question: Why do you want to do this, gods? A query as old as worship itself.”

“And what is the answer?”

“What do you expect it is?”

“Because you can. Because no one can stop a god but a god.”

“If you want the maudlin take, I suppose that would suffice. But it is too blunt, and more, you do not believe it yourself. Not completely. You were made, Jonathan Harker. All civilizations in all worlds in all layers of reality. And while the joy of creating a toy simply to break it has a brute pleasure in it, that defeats the purpose of sowing entities with the eternity of a soul. A mind. The truth is, it gets terribly lonesome and annoying with only other gods about. It’s always the same dull un-faces and same aggravating dramas running their gamut over the eons and it grows so tedious you could just detonate the entire idiot universe out of boredom. Which has happened more than once.” En sotto voce, he added, “Azathoth had not carved me out of himself to be his imaginary friend yet and so was prone to the odd cataclysmic tantrum whenever the Drummers and Pipers’ mad songs failed to soothe him. Between myself and all you new mites scurrying about and providing enrichment for the immortal crowds, this rendition of Existence has been the longest one running.

“Which is all to say that gods do what we do, from menace to miracles, so that we do not go insane and smash the whole thing.” Jonathan tried to crumple into himself as the Messenger traced his neck with the vampire’s nail. “Our sincerest thanks for enriching eternity for us. Of course, all of that could be a lie. I do not defraud, but I can lie. So perhaps it’s all just a matter of we in the deific menagerie pouring water on anthills for a laugh. Who can say?”

Jonathan neither knew nor much cared in the moment. Not for the first time in the years spent in this new state, he tried to wake up. Desperately, fervently, willing Mina to shake him awake or for some final rattling shock to jolt him back into his drowsing body. He could almost see himself prone on his office desk, Mina and Robert and fretting professional faces huddled around him, trying to solve the question of his absence from the cold flesh.

If this is a dream, it is not a living man’s. Do not bait yourself. You are here. You know it.

Yes, he knew it. But was it too much to imagine he wasn’t? To pretend there was some exit, some merciful end to—

What is that.

Something was coming up the derelict road. It stalked on two legs, strolling at a stolid march through the mire of horrors. Above, six arms flowered from the trunk of the body, carving through the living and unliving detritus with strange appendages that seemed like blades at a distance. All was unmade where it walked, all died and sighed. And above the arms, a stare. Cold. Cold.

 Hello, Jonathan thought with a curious flatness, do I know you?

“But here I am dawdling. You have done such a fine job and you are due for recompense. Here.” Jonathan sputtered a moment as something clasped over his face and knotted itself at the back of his head. A mask of yellowed ivory. “You’ll want something removable where we’re going. Even dead, I imagine trying to peel your face would sting somewhat.”

The god was closer now and the proportions revealed to be even more gargantuan than expected. Cthulhu’s mountainous bulk was dwarfed to a pebble beside a single leg. One of the hands that was a blade receded into itself to produce genuine digits. It bent down as if to crush Jonathan in a fist.

“It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God,” the Messenger intoned. They vanished from the spot as the massive hand came down. The god sighed. Stalked. Carved. Whittling at patience like a frail and flaking wood.

 On the living Earth, bodies had been removed from the premises of Hawkins and Harker. With little wheedling and much weeping, Lestrade had tilted things enough to allow Mina Harker and her glassy-eyed companions to take the cadaver of Jonathan Harker away. If not to the Harker estate.

 Within a ballroom, in the midst of a masquerade that had seen a thousand midnights and still had not ended, Jonathan Harker removed his mask to behold the shrieking Yellow splendor of the Palace of Hastur. If only briefly. The Messenger had not lingered to ward off the swarm of guests, some human, most in a state of transition to Carcosan native, some entirely indecipherable in terms of species, but all gilded in their finery. Some where so committed to the pageantry that their costumes were grafted to and through themselves.

One guest winnowed through the herd to rescue him from a dance with a partner whose arachnid legs glittered in either brilliant chitin or molten gold shells and whose manifold mouth seemed intent on trying to fit both around and inside his own. The guest straightened the black-gold brooch at his throat before snatching Jonathan away with an inescapable flourish.

“Mr. Harker!” laughed a voice through the Yellow-red spill of peeled lips. “How stunning to find you gracing such circles as these—pardon, dear Lady, but I simply must borrow him; His Tattered Majesty calls, many thanks—I had not expected you to be on such a guest list. Not after that little tiff with Miss Pleasance and your fellows. Perhaps your being one of those addicts of the Bard has won pardon enough. I will not lie and say I saw old William about, but I might say I saw Marlowe, just as I might say they are in talks for a sequel to Doctor Faustus to make up for Goethe’s nauseating rendition…”

 As the faceless guest hauled him out of the ballroom and into further phantasmagoric halls that coiled and sprawled like an architectural damask pattern, Jonathan’s eye fell upon the clutching hand. Over the silk glove’s ring finger was a wedding band of simple gold that now blazed Yellow. But on the forefinger was a signet ring with the letter W encrusted in ornamentation. As he recognized it, the recollection of the wetly rasping voice dawned on him.

“Lord Wotton?”

“I was, I am, I fear I shall be forever. But at least the fear is well-written here. None of that blubbering twaddle I get from my neighbors in the asylum. All their madness is terribly mediocre. The mere misfiring of this lobe or an overload of that chemical. The King, at least, lends some artistry to it.  I only wish he would stop fussing with the Second Act and move on to a new work. We are a busy cast of props and each time he rewrites the scene, we must have another midnight unmasking. Which would not be so awful—there is the most marvelous conversation to be had and I have no qualms about an endless party—but no one has a mask they can spare. I arrived without one and so must always shed more of what’s above the neck. Even once I hit bone and brain and the jelly of eyes, unmask, unmask. Do you suppose I can still talk without a head? I’m sure I can, I shall. Gods know there was living proof enough in England that one might talk extensively without ownership of a brain. If anything, it only improves one’s standing in Parliament.”

Wotton laughed at that. A noise that pierced at the last ragged note.

“So I must assume. I don’t see myself holding the ears of anyone beyond the Lake of Hali or Purfleet’s medical swaddling anytime soon. How would I know what goes on in Parliament? That silly trinket of a youth…oh, what was it? Dorian? Dorian. He comes by now and then. He never talks of Parliament. Truly, he’s become such a dreary lad. But at least he wears despair prettier than I ever shall.”  

“Wotton—,”

“Don’t let him read it, Mr. Harker. I get the feeling he may do something rash—there are more mirrors in his head than thoughts and more a parrot in his throat than his own words, so I fear he may pick the thing up just to follow after me. Ah, but he did warn me, didn’t he? And the silly boy believed me when I said I would not try again. Perhaps it is better to be a mirror than whatever I was before the play. Not a good thing. That is his rule about it, did you know?”

“Wotton, wait—,”

Up the stairs, past chambers that stared out over a land steeped in toxic hues of poison frog and stinging wasp. Dull sun and duller moon drifted in lazy orbits like searching vultures.

“Oh, the Wallpaper Women, they were mere refugees. Never touched a page but for that first girl locked in the room. She found it waiting under the floorboards for her. Wanted to be an actress, so it’s said, and she would even have taken Cassilda’s fate over her own mundane Purgatory. The book’s paper stained the wall’s paper and the way was opened for all the Cassildas and Camillas to follow. In another Earth, he even spared a girl from the suicide of the Pallid Mask. He even brought her pets back to life after her cad lover dumped them in it. Oh, he plagued an entire world, a warped reflection of our meager mud ball, and hunted the secret sinners in all their corners. Some sinned great and some sinned mild. But they were found and were damned with the evil stepsisters’ plight. They had birds eat their eyes and glass carve their feet for their domestic evils.

“But the tyrants, the traitors, the cowards, the cads, we are gathered here to play our bit parts. The justice of the fairy tale. The dramatic catharsis of the stage. It is why I can never stop talking. No matter what I have or haven’t to say.”

“Wotton.”

“Yes?”

They had come to a stop on a high corridor whose black marble shined with faces. Jonathan pressed his mask into Wotton’s empty hand.

“Keep it.”

“…Thank you. Now, the King is waiting. Supposedly to deliver a message, but I suspect he wants another pair of eyes to sear with a read-through. I shall leave you to it. And Mr. Harker?”

“Yes?”

Lord Henry Wotton, eternal attendee of the masquerade paused before hiding the raw meat of his face with the ivory. The naked eyes finally met Jonathan’s.

“Dorian did not tell you all that I said. I have no hope in that cell, you know. No more than I do here. But each time my mind flits back to that room, to Earth and flesh and the flicker-flints of sanity, it reminds me what is to become of me for good. A man on another Earth, Castaigne, his madness ate him to death. He told me so as he wept and groveled in a crown he made of bone and silverware. I know what my ending is, but the sane spells…those are wretched. They grow briefer and briefer and the relief of them is torture, for I know how soon I will be back here to unmask again. I told Dorian then, I tell you now. See me dead back there, if you can. Tap Dr. Seward and his lancet for it. Godalming or the American if you must absolutely scrape the bottom of the barrel. But…

“But I would feel more relieved if it was you. Finality seems more in your purview. Anyway.” He tied on the mask. “It is nearly midnight. I must be off.”

He disappeared down the stairwell just as an ornate door of gold and black stone swung silently open. Jonathan stepped inside. The first thing he heard was the sound of keys click-hammering away with a speed that rivalled his memory of Mina’s whirlwind typing. It was not the sound of a typewriter, however. The noise was a far gentler tap-tap-tap with no slide and snap as the finished sheet spat its way out of the device. Tap-tap-tap-tap. Pause. Click. Click. Tap-tap-tap-tap-tap-tap. Click. Tap-tap.

“In here, Mr. Harker. Or do you prefer Jonathan?”

Jonathan followed the voice—a man’s, mellow but focused—through a looming wilderness of books and bound manuscripts and shelves that reached up into a lightless ceiling so high it might have melted up into a night sky. He found his way through by following an ochre glow whose source rested in an illumination veined through the walls of what seemed to be a decadent designer’s iteration of a writer’s cluttered office.

The King in Yellow sat bent at a desk, the wisps of his fingers flying over the low flat keys of some wafer-thin creation of crystal lens and golden frame. Words grew into paragraphs on a never-ending scroll within the glass as a strange ornate box to the desk’s side opened its mouth on a hinge and grew what looked like a book page by page within its patient cover-to-be.

“I can go by Hastur if you like. Or Ambrose. Sometimes I’m even a Charlotte. I’m only a Howard when I’m feeling particularly gruesome. I’ll not wheedle you for a Your Tattered Majesty or suchlike. Henry cannot help himself with his bitter-edged flattery and flattering bitterness. It’s taken him nearly a hundred years to get around to developing a sincere thought. Quite proud of him, honestly. Thought it would take at least two centuries minimum. Coffee?”

Jonathan noticed for the first time that he did smell caffeine cutting through the air. The only blend he’d ever tried was one that Quincey had insisted was the most palatable out of all the, ‘downright depressing,’ offerings London had in supply at any café or shop, apparently paling compared to the cups he had ground himself back in Texas. He followed his nose to a petite but handsome machine with a crystal pitcher full of coffee whose scent was nearly perfume in how it prickled. As he watched, the King in Yellow willed it to pour into a weathered mug, followed by a dollop of pearlescent cream and a sprinkle of white powder—

“Not that nutcase Pan’s dust, I assure you. Even if it didn’t give me transfiguring indigestion, it doesn’t even have the excuse of a decent flavor. That was just a pinch of sweetener. Jar’s by the machine.” The mug drifted to the waiting palm of a spidery over-knuckled hand. From there, a gnarled slit opened in the ivory horror of the King’s face and nursed the brown brew. “Ah. Should have added caramel. But I save that for after I finish a chapter. Take a seat, take a seat.”

Warily, Jonathan found a clear space on a nearby couch. He sat amid more books, more papers. On the nearest sheet:

'Good stranger,' I continued, 'I am ill and lost. Direct me, I beseech you, to Carcosa.'

The man broke into a barbarous chant in an unknown tongue, passing on and away.

An owl on the branch of a decayed tree hooted dismally and was answered by another in the distance. Looking upward, I saw through a sudden rift in the clouds Aldebaran and the Hyades! In all this there was a hint of night -- the lynx, the man with the torch, the owl. Yet I saw -- I saw even the stars in absence of the darkness. I saw, but was apparently not seen nor heard. Under what awful spell did I exist?

I seated myself at the root of a great tree, seriously to consider what it were best to do. That I was mad I could no longer doubt, yet recognized a ground of doubt in the conviction. Of fever I had no trace. I had, withal, a sense of exhilaration and vigor altogether unknown to me -- a feeling of mental and physical exaltation. My senses seemed all alert; I could feel the air as a ponderous substance; I could hear the silence.

A great root of the giant tree against whose trunk I leaned as I sat held enclosed in its grasp a slab of stone, a part of which protruded into a recess formed by another root. The stone was thus partly protected from the weather, though greatly decomposed. Its edges were worn round, its corners eaten away, its surface deeply furrowed and scaled. Glittering particles of mica were visible in the earth about it-vestiges of its decomposition. This stone had apparently marked the grave out of which the tree had sprung ages ago. The tree's exacting roots had robbed the grave and made the stone a prisoner.

A sudden wind pushed some dry leaves and twigs from the uppermost face of the stone; I saw the low-relief letters of an inscription and bent to read it. God in heaven! my name in full! -- the date of my birth! -- the date of my death!

“An early draft, but one of my better ones, I think. Working on something a little riskier for the next world. Grim and sweet at once. A bit of detective theme, a good dose of eldritch horror, but with less of that suffocating purple prose. A bit more wit, more soul. Arthur seems a good name. Arthur and John. What do you think?”

“I think I’m quite confused,” Jonathan admitted. “And I will have to pass on the coffee. The dead don’t drink. At least I haven’t yet and it’s been…” He tried to think. To count. “I really cannot say how many years.”

“Ha. ‘The dead don’t drink,’ he says. Amazing you can say so with a straight face when your entire origin story centered around some terribly thirsty corpses. Even the lack of, quote, ‘true,’ corporeality is no reason to cut yourself off. What do you think the folks of the Elysian Fields are doing with those ambrosial gardens? The heavens, the nirvanas, the realms of fantasy and reward unending, all have made accommodations for the act of consumption. It is one of the delights of life and, being a delight, it is not barred from a soul unpinned from its world. And while this is no such paradise, the act of percolating a drink the dead can imbibe is less than child’s play.” The King’s voice dropped to a stage whisper, “Nyarlathotep does so love to peacock about how he’s one of the older kids, how he’s Azathoth’s favorite, the Messenger and Soul of the Gods, the Crawling Chaos, and so forth.

“He is all those things, sure. But he’s also, if you will pardon the jargon of the future, full of shit.” The King took a sip. “There’s tea as well, if you prefer…Mr. Harker? Or Jonathan?”

“Jonathan.”

He moved to get up for a cup, but the King’s hand went click, a new crystal scroll appeared in the lens, the keys tap-tap-tapped and Jonathan was suddenly holding his favorite cup from the cabinet he and Mina had brought from their little apartment to the house Peter Hawkins had left them. Scuffed and shabby, but theirs, like all the cups and plates they had found in secondhand shops together. It was even the blend Mina made for them on Sundays. Holding its heat, smelling the leaves, brought hot needles back to eyes and heart in a way he hadn’t felt in—

Minutes. Years. Lifetimes.

—so, so long.

“I feel I am becoming static. I keep asking the same questions, but I must ask again, just in case an answer happens. What is this? All of this?”

“Yes, you have asked before. It’s a lucid thing to do. Not many of the dead, the dreaming, and the in-between will bother with it. The mind sleeks itself down to fit the logic of the domain. The only whats and hows and whys that occur to them are in reaction to the stimuli of their narrative. None of your existential pinhole-poking. The Messenger can get away with tapdancing around honest answers because he is, you will have noticed, an immensely overpowered snot. Which does track with him being one of the most humanoid of his crowd. He’ll call it ‘dumbing himself down’ for the Earthly brain. Meanwhile the most intelligent conversation he’s had in the past five millennia has been listening to Kadath’s Dream Gods chatting about their vacation to hallucinatorily pretty faux New England. Even the shoggoths have more on the brain than the rest of the geriatric pantheon. They think like fungi and only really get somewhere interesting when they playact like the mortals.”

Another sip. Tap-tap-tap-tap…

One hand typed all the while as the King said, “Which is all very fascinating in the abstract, but not the answer to your questions. The trouble is, I cannot be too blatant. That would ruin what’s coming and it hardly needs any help. Already this plot you’ve been punted into is haphazard and frayed and, frankly, borderline amateurish. There’s a reason Old Crawly did not orchestrate Randolph’s little dream quest in the next reality over so much as watch him putter along at random to Kadath before doing the divine equivalent of tying his shoelaces together to see if he’d trip and fall into unending terror and lunacy at the heart of Azathoth. But then Mr. Carter went and woke up. Prank foiled.

“Sadly, it’s not so simple for you. Being dead isn’t even the worst of it. He actually has something of a plan for you. Nothing so grandiose and clogged with a nesting doll of wiles and prophecy so much as seeing an opportunity to run with. One he has been running with since he filled you with his poison. He’s been having fun with it. With you. With the game of keep-away. But soon he will come down to the climax; that is, turning the game fully to a con. When that time comes, you must keep certain things in mind. Take note.”

The King in Yellow held up one wispy digit after the other, ticking points off.

“One, it feels like ages since it mattered, but recall you are a solicitor by trade. Fine print and property law will remain bafflingly pertinent even now, for he will try to get you to sign. It is his only way to give his claim legitimacy.

“Two, the messages you assumed you could not deliver, you can. Not only by death, and not only by whispering through the Dreamlands. Do not forget—ignorance was and remains your worst enemy. You could have slain Dracula in his castle if you had known all the factors; your instincts and your God nearly got you there, but for the trick of the basilisk stare and the swarming minions. What you believe is possible is your limit. Discover what lies beyond those assumptions, and far more doors will open to you.

“Three, your God is not of Abraham. Nor of Alhazred. While there is fair claim for a custody battle with Eros, for your tithes are many to Love, even that is not your God. They have blessed you many times and you have done your duty by them in due fashion. That you are as you are now is testing their patience down to its last infinitesimal thread. Which the Messenger knows.

“Four, and this is most vital—,”

A cool fingerless grip locked around Jonathan’s throat and hauled him backward in a strangled tumble. Couch and Carcosa, cup and King disappeared as he was hooked through and away to a place that had existed on many Earths and none—one of several lies made to Euclidean space.

Jonathan fell in a sprawl upon sand that lurched and lived against its will under frantic constellations. When he looked up, he saw a black pyramid whose blocks were carved from cosmic abyss. It scarcely held his attention. Not compared to the shape that trundled on its spiny legs and turned his mind over in the teeth of its three-lobed eye like a child gnawing a candy.

“I do hope you did not take him seriously. He was meant to tell you something important, not improvise some piddling addition to his script.” Nyarlathotep, the Crawling Chaos, sighed and half the stars guttered like candles. “There is simply no trusting a writer.”

 In the headquarters of the League, Jonathan Harker’s corpse was arranged on a table beneath a lamp. His snowy head rested on a pillow rather than a block, the eyes and mouth examined cautiously. Robert Holt’s description of the men who arrived prior, only one of whom remained by dint of being dead, was worrisome.

“I couldn’t tell how many men were with Lord Brighton,” he did not catch how both Dr. Jekyll and Griffin bristled at the name, “one man or two. I thought I must have imagined the third.” He described the third man as he’d seemed before he’d been mistaken for a shadow. Mina had to fight not to scream or be sick. Art dropped into his chair as if punched. Quincey let Jack grip his hand with his own trembling fingers until he ached. Van Helsing looked miserably to the ceiling and began whispering as many curses as prayers in every language he knew.

This, in conjunction with Jekyll and Griffin’s murmured suspicions of Brighton, or ‘Q,’ as the supposed alias was—the stuff of barroom twaddle and urban legend that higher circles would not quite dare to breathe aloud where the high-class walls had ears—made many more hearts freeze. And then there was the newspaper, marked by Jonathan’s pen. The dead Professor Derleth, Miskatonic University, one of the few known homes of a copy of the Necronomicon.

“But why would anyone want to bring the Count back? If they knew why he was slain, what he was…”

“Lord Brighton was half dust last time he was seen in public,” Dorian croaked from his corner. “Even Henry avoided the man. Said he felt too much like Brighton was daydreaming of ways to siphon the life out of him like one might suck the juice from an orange.”

“If not a vampire, then he was certainly a man who wished to be,” Holmes said half to the room and half to the air. His hawkish gaze had yet to move from Jonathan Harker’s head. “However he found out about Dracula, it perhaps more inspired than worried him. Money can only comfort so long before the Ferryman comes to call and he needs but the cheapest fare to do his job. Mere tuppence. But assuming Brighton was successful in bringing the Count back, it would explain nothing of what was found in the office. Or not found. No Lord Brighton. No Necronomicon.”

“But plus a dead henchman with not a mark on his neck and—and Jonathan with,” Jack’s gorge rose, rose, balanced at the back of his throat, “with the wrong kind of mark.”

“It is true,” Van Helsing said in a dead tone that fought to be doctorial. “Dracula, even being animal-crude, he did not leave a bite so strange upon the neck, only little spots such as a pinprick leaves. These punctures too are small, but far, far too many. It looks to my eye like the leech or his cousin the lamprey took their drink.”

“A nested mouth. Yes.” Holmes gnawed and puffed at his pipe. “Mr. Morris, you say there were such maws to be found lurking in your adventure in Louisiana?”

“I did. There were. Though I wouldn’t call those lot vampires. Not undead, just folks with the same condition as those poor Innsmouth locals. They couldn’t have done that,” he said softly in the table’s direction. “They need the water. I’m more curious about the black stain on his tongue.” In his chair, Holmes straightened up an inch. Only Watson and Irene noticed. “Supposing he—supposing something made him…” He floundered a moment.

“Supposing this third man, Dracula or not, did to him what was done to me? The exchange of blood?” Mina’s voice cut the air like a knife. It barely raised. It was barely a voice at all. Which made sense, she supposed. She did not feel she was entirely in the room at present. Too much of her mind had fled howling from the tangible world as her mind tried, in its constant habit, to search for Jonathan’s presence. Not here, naturally. Not in that dead flesh. Not on Earth. Out, away, beyond. But there were so many directions. So much wilderness of other planes to hunt.

No. She would not find him.

No. She would not stop.

“Mina, perhaps you shouldn’t be—,”

“You fear him getting up as much as staying on the slab, don’t you? You fear worse than that, supposing this Dracula was not Dracula at all.” All watched as her hand folded into the limp digits of her husband’s. Fresh tears threatened as she realized it was not cold, but merely the temperature of the room. Tepid. “The Necronomicon does have a nasty habit of bearing especially horrendous fruit.”

“Mina—,”

“You will not put a stake in his heart. Nor will you sever him.”

“No one is suggesting…” but Watson went silent as Holmes laid a hand on his arm. In the same moment the doctor caught the many gazes that dropped and darted. “It is too soon to consider such measures, is it not? We’ve yet to even examine him in full.”

“It can certainly be no worse than the Leicester case,” Jekyll said through a shudder. “Nor that of Ms. Vaughn. But Morris is right. That black stain is too much a tell. Perhaps some manner of poison?”

“No,” Irene hummed from where she’d been pacing. She had unearthed a folder that had turned bloated with research. The label K.i.Y. and adjacent was scratched at its top. “Not poison. Anything good enough to masquerade as Dracula, and keep Jonathan in his chair without getting the blade out, and got their teeth into him? That’s too much power to bother with something so mundane as poison. Whatever it had him choke down, it was meant to do something more creative than murder.”

“What of the dead man on the rug, then?” Robert Holt croaked. He was on his third tumbler and not a drop had served to dent the wretchedness in his head or his eyes. “Joseph Davies. He was a bit green at his edges when I saw him go in, but nothing suggested he wasn’t hale as a horse. This thing playing Dracula, did it not do the same to him?”

“No, Mr. Holt. There was no fit for Jonathan, no foaming. Different methods were applied for each man. Davies was a mere afterthought. I would wager even Lord Brighton was but a means to an end. This entity, our Dracula-in-potentia—he wanted Jonathan for something.” Irene looked aside at the man on the table and the woman holding his hand. Her voice softened. “But then left him behind.”

“No. No, that isn’t it.” Mina’s throat strained. “There’s nothing here. That is the strangest thing in this. If this were some elaborate way of providing a-a host for some demon or monstrous progeny, an eldritch infection or the like, that would make more sense. I’d know if there was something else in here.” Her thumb rubbed the weathered gold of his wedding band. “Some usurping force or other. I’d know if he was stuck somewhere inside. But there’s really, truly nothing. It’s as if—as if he were shoved out of himself and the space he left behind was filled up with plaster. No possession. Just a blockade.” She brought the lukewarm hand up to her lips. “It does not even feel like a death. More like—like a crude joke. O-Or a robbery. I don’t know. I don’t know.”

Her voice hitched until it cracked. A sound like glass splintering.

“I am so tired. So, so tired of this same joke, over and over. He cannot be stolen from me again. Not again. Not like this.”

Quiet thickened for a long spell. In it, Holmes still did not look away from Jonathan Harker’s head. Finally, he took himself fully to the table and stared down at the pale young man’s mouth. He scrutinized it as if it were some living culprit. Or else sheltering it.

“Sherlock?” from Irene. “What is it?”

“The stain. It’s wrong.”

“Wrong..?” from Watson.

“It hadn’t occurred to me until you mentioned it, Mr. Morris. You said, ‘the black stain on his tongue.’ You only saw him as he was brought in, as most everyone here did. Looking at him now,” the whole room bristled as he pulled on his leather gloves and pried the jaws open, “yes, his tongue is stained. But only his tongue.” His line of sight moved to first Robert, then Mina. “Which is wrong.”

For a moment, both wondered at him. But they looked again at Jonathan’s face, frozen in dread as it was. It was hard work tearing their eyes away from his, but when they did, they peered as one at his mouth. Revelation sliced through heart and stomach at once.

“Oh, God. It changed,” Robert spoke so low he barely heard himself.

“What? What has changed?” came the murmur from the room at large.

“The stain,” Mina breathed, her hand now quivering around the corpse’s. “It isn’t what it was when I first saw it. Robert?”

“It changed,” he repeated. “It’s nowhere near what it was when I got the door open.”

“I’m not following,” Jekyll put in, frowning over the dead man more closely.

“Likewise,” from Griffin.

“Only the tongue is stained now,” Holmes said. This time his eyes fell solely on Robert. “But what did he look like when you found him, Mr. Holt?”

“It was a mess,” Robert said, now outright gawping at Jonathan’s clean face. “A great oily spatter across his mouth and chin. Some had even dripped down his neck.”

“And you, Mina? You got there before I or Lestrade’s men reached the spot.”

“His lips. Just his lips, teeth, and tongue were blackened.” Mina swallowed around a hot pain. “I remember thinking it looked like the stain a child gets after sucking on some colorful sweet.”

“Indeed. And now all that is left is the blotch on his tongue.” Holmes’ eyes seemed to flash as he pulled the jaw open wider. “There is not even a drop left upon the gums. This mess has been draining so steadily, so stealthily, that it was almost imperceptible that it was retreating into him at all. Hiding away and hoping no grieving witness would take note. This stuff,” he said, glowering at the blackness in Jonathan Harker’s throat, “is an accomplice in and of itself. Alive enough to work on behalf of the initial attacker. If we can get it out…”

But there was already a small legion of doctors rushing the cabinets. Jack fished out a surgical hook with a long black handle. Aiming it handle side down, he positioned himself opposite Holmes. Holmes was just as hastily shouldered aside by Watson, his own gloved hands taking up the task of holding the mouth open.

“Keep him steady,” Jack said without looking up.

“Go on,” Watson nodded.

The handle descended toward the uvula. Yet before it could even graze the throat, Mina’s head snapped up. Her line of sight faced the western wall. Toward the library.

“Mina? What is it?”

“There’s something—,”

But her words were lost in the sound of the crash. And the laughter.

 Back in the ink-dark desert, the Crawling Chaos was doing his best to turn Jonathan Harker’s soul inside out and into exciting new shapes. The god had insisted as best he could over the man’s screams that it was really Hastur who should be blamed. Guile was always the greater thrill than brute force. Not that it took an iota of force to play with Jonathan as he was now. Just a little light incentive for him to disregard the King in Yellow’s poor advice and take a wiser course once he allowed Mr. Harker to have eyes and hands and the ability to use them properly.

“True, I do not have the cloven hooves on or the guise of a Franciscan friar, but the Book of Azathoth can be signed with or without pageantry. I granted Gilman a little trans-dimensional tour and all it got anyone for their trouble was a sore throat for Keziah and a hearty meal for Brown Jenkin. Decent playthings all. But this?”

Nyarlathotep tweezed the kukri from its sheath, the metal’s shine still warped into an ugly iridescence with the polish of his veins. He ran it through Jonathan Harker’s stomach for the first cry. Twisted it for the second. Then stuck him to one of the enormous building blocks of the pyramid like a beetle. Jonathan willed his hands to be hands again, willed them to pull at the handle with the struggling fibers of his strength, but the blade would not move. It was not his.

“This is an investment. One I would have been so happy to lay out in pleasanter terms. But the King has gone and soured any words a Pharaoh might have offered. I felt your suspicious little wheels turning and smoking up here.”

Jonathan howled again as the ichor fired its roots up and into the phantom bowl of his skull, filling his mind with knives and salt.

“Yes, I am upset as well. But if nothing else, the Count’s treatment proved how precarious it is to let the game of cordiality play past pretense. You were a slippery thing when given a moment’s chance upon the corporeal Earth. I’ve no doubt you would have wriggled away from even my grasp, given the chance. It is one of three things you do so well, Jonathan Harker. Escape. Persuade. Pursue. All in service to some Good beyond yourself. It is a most admirable disposition and better still for your actually having the skill to make it matter. But to the point.”

The giant and its distended sin of anatomy disappeared. The Pharaoh now perched airily upon the block below the one Jonathan dangled from. Prismatic robes billowed like wings from him and the obscenities of his eyes stood out all the brighter in the handsome face. Again he held the strange book he had cradled at R’lyeh, along with its calcified pen. He flipped idly through the pages until he came upon a section of paper darker than the rest. Veins pulsed in each heavy sheet. The names upon them were few compared to the thick portion before it. Those contained generations of multiple eras on multiple worlds in multiple dimensions. The one the Pharaoh held up for Jonathan to see already had his name in it, though not printed in his hand.

All the names in all the languages he could and could not fathom above it had been written in that style—it was only the phrase beside each that had any variety. They belonged to the owners of the names.  

“We are due to make things official. It is all well and good to collect grovelers and kissers of robes for their own sake, but it is quite another to gain someone for the retinue who is good for more than being a sentient bauble. And you, Mr. Harker, have performed splendidly throughout the interview.” At the word, Jonathan’s own donated ledger manifested in the air. Pages packed with itineraries and messages shared with myriad Powers, flipping through the years-that-were-not. It vanished just as neatly. “While I cannot offer you anything so low as a law firm, I shall give you something far more precious.

“You shall live again, Jonathan Harker. You will walk in your Earthly flesh, whole and unharmed—the token you swallowed has kept your husk preserved against all decay and destruction. So it always shall. More, you will be able to stroll through all worlds, all membranes of reality, without the trouble of projection or translocation. You will go as gods go, in service to what the gods require. You shall keep those Powers who paw at the Earth in a complacent state, lest they give in to tantrum at last and make a ruin of your planet. And, naturally, you will see her again. All your little skittering hive will be in reach once more. What messages you have gathered for them can be passed on before you pass out of their lives. Which will be best, given your situation. It is always a distressing time when an endless thing loves that which ends.

“Perhaps you could look up Ms. Vaughn the next time she reforms. I’m given to understand she’s one of Pan’s more charming spawn and you will be too durable to off yourself once she shows you what’s under the skin. Opportunities abound. But that’s all to come. First, you must sign beside your name. Three little lines. Iä Azathoth. Iä Nyarlathotep. Then, in whatever tongue you please…” The Pharaoh pried one of Jonathan’s shaking grips from the kukri’s handle and slipped the pen into it. “…I am as God’s hand. Though I should like you to be more than that in time. Hastur did not lie when he said I suffer from a dearth of good company.” Jonathan watched as the Pharaoh shifted to the Count. He wore his noble’s cloak rather than the London tailoring, his white hair flowed rather than the black, and his bloodless face turned back to the skeletal gauntness of that early thirst. “I am in hopes I shall see more of you in—,”

You will see nothing.

The thought came to Jonathan only after his fist had locked about the pen and driven it straight through the god’s borrowed red eye. The pupil bloomed at once into its three-lobed truth as new ichor poured and squirmed and glowered upon the pallid cheek. The god clicked his tongue.

“I see you need more time to consider the proper course. It hurts my heart to know it. A few of them, even.” The pen was plucked free as the vampiric maw began to grow. Too clear a view of the churning and pulsing of the god’s innards appeared in the gullet. “You shall roost in the chambers of the third one. A cozy niche beside a valve where you can think on your actions. We shall try this again in a century.”

But as the mouth yawned, the pyramid trembled. All the sands shook with it. The arid warmth that had filled the air now descended into a cutting cold. Overhead, the stars that had once guttered went out entirely. Yet Jonathan Harker could see.

See the god wearing the vampire frown.

See the healing wound of the eye suddenly blossom again, bleeding godly gore and gristle as a man might.

See the rot that turned the aristocratic hide to spongy decay.

See the silhouette of a hand big enough to balance a schooner on its thumb clamp around the side of the pyramid, followed by the head of its owner. A head crowned with a striped nemes, that reeked of flowers and spice and carrion. A head that belonged to a jackal. A head whose growl shivered the desert again. Jonathan had been hearing the black sand’s whispered wailing up until then—when the thunder of the growl ended, there was only silence. The god beside him reassembled his borrowed face enough to grouse.

“Ah,” said the Messenger, scratching at his decomposition with the fervor of one clawing away an eruption of acne. “You.”

“Me.”

“In my defense, you were hardly putting him to full use andrrggghhl,” as he spoke, Dracula’s throat split and his chest dribbled. Even his forehead split and oozed. Necrosis and ash ate through him. The god balanced his dying head on his shoulders and sighed wetly.

“What was that? I cannot hear you over the sound of your chicanery.”

The god wearing Anubis snapped his fingers. It produced both a thunderclap and Jonathan Harker, still impaled, dropped into his palm. He froze as Anubis pinched the kukri from out of his middle. Cold flooded into the wound as Nyarlathotep’s intrusion bled out, freezing, hissing, and flaking away on the frigid wind. Even the grim shine of the kukri shrilled and shuddered away, the ichor fleeing its metal host like condensation. Anubis shook the grimy frost loose and willed it to its home in Jonathan’s sheath.

“It is trouble enough to clean up the mess you and yours leave in play. I draw the line at poaching.”

“Borrowing,” said the Pharaoh. The Count had rotted off of him, though he still had to pick at remaining viscera. “Expanding his prospects, as it were. Opening the door to more creative endeavors than you and your sickles.”

“By robbing him, pantomiming the role of his patron, and cheating him out of his earned eternity. By trying to cheat me. Had you already gotten to the drivel about how very ancient and endless and Before and After the Outer Gods and their descendants are? Or were you saving that for the honeymoon?”

“We are the Before and the After and Existence itself,” Nyarlathotep intoned. “Unlike you. Even Death may die. This you know.”

“Yes, you slithering ponce, of course I do. I’ve been doing the metaphysic equivalent of changing you and yours’ nappies since the first time Azathoth had a fit. You cannot fathom the mess there would be without an End to go with your destructions and disfigurements. And that's not even counting the Cataclysms you are all too far up your own cosmic crevasses to have been aware of in this and neighboring Existences. Ones where you do exist and ones where you—bliss of blisses—do not. At least not as anything more than paper. If it were not for the logistical wreckage to follow, I would scrap this entire universe for the relief of not picking up after you.”

“As if you could.”

The jackal lips leered.

“As if I haven’t. You do love the confidence of thinking yourself forever, don’t you, Crawling Chaos? Out of them all, I think you are the most able to be satisfied at yourself. Creeping through neighbor realities, practicing your pranks on mirrored worlds across time and space. Earth is always a favorite, blithe little blue marble that it is. On his, that world’s Hildred Castaigne and his compatriots from a quaint cult in America are about to make a fine mess; one I’ve no doubt you planned to keep him from until the revelation came too late. Always a fine tactic, that—remove all ties but yours. But you conspired for this with the same ignorance you conspire everything.

“The ignorance of one who mistakes himself for singular. Unique. Irreplaceable and infinite. You, Soul of the Gods, are so thick you even believe Pan and Hastur are younger than you. Than Azathoth. Than me, as I exist in this script. All because you are too proud to read all that is written. It’s not all invention, you know. Some is merely taking dictation. You have not even crossed paths with the Messenger whose Tablets lay in wait for Mark Ebor. Do ask the King in Yellow for his shelf marked ‘Blackwood’ if you feel especially daring. Use the Black Seal of Ixaxar to read what the Peoples Below have written of history before Earth grew around them.

“Or throw yourself in Leng and putrefy awhile. I do not much care. But whatever you do, past, present, and future, in all the realities you can and cannot fathom? Know that the next time you try to pickpocket what is mine, I will eat through a thousand of your faces and as many of your toy-worlds. Know that I will whisper a secret from Hastur’s drafts that will kill your delusions with the march of a starving maggot and leave you hiding and soiling yourself in your tendrils with all your precious pretensions Ended without hope of resurrection. Know that for all the deaths and undeaths and deaths-that-die by your tinkering, eternity does not exist. I will be there, waiting. Beyond the last of the scripts. The last apokálypsis. The End. Know that, Nyarlathotep. And know one thing more, above all else.”

Jonathan Harker watched as Anubis unfolded into something else. Something no human hand or eye or word could ever fully illustrate, no matter how many ages and god-faces they had tried to sketch it with.

Yes, it was Anubis. It was also Osiris. It was Yama and Shiva, Hel and Níðhöggr, Thanatos and Charon, Ereshkigal and Nergal, Māra and Morana, Arawn and Morrígan, and a hundred more besides.

It was the Death as greater-than-dreamt, greater-than-feared, greater-than-prayed by every world known, unknown, unborn, undead within the slim infinity of a single multiverse.

It was cold.

It was the End.

“DEATH MAY DIE. BUT I AM NEVER CHEATED.”

The toll of the voice was too much. Oblivion came. Jonathan Harker went.

Gone to rest.

 “Sorry, son. I would let you drowse until the sun burns out if I did not think you’d hate yourself for it after. Even with such elastic time as we have here, even if I told you there was more than enough to make the save, you would hate yourself for dallying. Alive or dead, you grudge yourself any time to rest.”

Jonathan swam up to the voice with a spasm. Papers flew, books toppled, a pen clattered away. A hand padded with age and calluses settled on his shoulder. Cold, familiar. Good.

“Easy. No exams here. Nor any godly grunt work. That was what he was after you for, you know. He wanted all the play on Earth for himself while you took the errands. Doubt if he’ll admit it anytime this millennium, but you did a fairer job of it than he would have. You are a more than worthy worker, lad. I’m sure you’ve heard so before and ignored it—but don’t deny it now.”

Jonathan looked up and knew at once that he was not seeing or hearing the true Peter Hawkins. No more than he was sitting at his old clerk’s desk outside the man’s office with the late spring light turning the afternoon air to amber and gold. It did not stop his tears.

“He—it—y-you said someone named Castaigne was coming after the League? Wotton said he was in the ballroom…” Hawkins-who-wasn’t waved his hand at that.

“Same and different. The madman in the King��s masquerade was plotting fratricide long before the play got to him, and he did that plotting in an America that does not exist in your Earth. Pray it never does. The Castaigne at the League’s doorstep is another Hildred—your Hildred—and he has made friends with some misled admirers of the drowsy fellow in the ocean. The one who gave you that first Earthly memo to deliver, you’ll recall.” A fond exasperation came into the lined face; the look Jonathan had been met with a dozen times in as many days when Hawkins had caught him working and studying on half a night’s sleep. “I shall save you the pleading. We’ve been done with that since you cracked the old leech upside the head with a spade. I do not much like a cheater, nor do I abide by the ruin they leave behind them. Death shall die for you yet, son. Only walk with me on your way back. We’ve a shortcut.”

Jonathan took the hand that was Hawkins’ and staggered up from the desk. He followed the old man out the door and into—well. There were not words enough for the place any more than its Owner. But it was the place of After. The place of Endings and Beginnings. Crossroads and Crossrivers. Jonathan could not help his stare and was grateful for the first time in ages that he need not blink.

“Is he here somewhere? The real Peter Hawkins?”

“Him. Lucy. Some sailors. A fresh and frantic Transylvanian sent here by the poor mercy of a bullet; he would have a message for you too, regarding his men left to the wolves and the wild. Nyarlathotep bled them, but like the deplorable Mr. Davies, he never finishes his work in full. Those he ‘kills’ he obstructs. Locks them inside their own rot to make the suffering last even down into dust. Or at least until I or some volunteer come along with charity in hand. In your case, he did the reverse. Locked you out of the house and dragged you off before I could catch up to you. A natural death, your rightful death, that’d snap you straight to one of my faces and places. But not his work. Damned cheat.”

They were passing out of Death and into Dream. Jonathan felt the change like a shift in weather even before the scenery altered. Paranoia blossomed.

“We can skip this part if you like. Leave Q to go on suffering karma’s overdue quid pro quo for another hundred and nine years. Ellison could wring gallons of inspiration from this particular crevice of horror, but the short story will get to the point neatly enough. Ah, disregard the steel pillar. That’s for another Earth that even the Elder Things won’t touch.”

Jonathan began to read the flaring writing on the steel—

(HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I’VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE.)

—and swiftly ducked his head. The steel, which, of course, was not just steel, glared after him as he went, sullen at his flesh-free form. Jonathan had no meat or bone to play with and so the thing of Hate merely thought sulking sadism after him.

They came upon something worse, if only for how much pity it inspired. That and repulsion.

“Lord Brighton is quite alive and quite aware. He can be nothing else. The immortality of an especially durable and despairing jellyfish. And because he was made so whilst still holding a certain ancient volume of ill repute in his hands, it never left the things those hands became. You see?”

Jonathan saw. Regrettably. The Necronomicon was grafted into the gelatin of the semi-fluid limbs. What might have been Lord Brighton’s face bubbled and moaned at them. An attempt to run ended only in a shuffle and splatter against the metal floor. A splatter that lived and lived and lived.  

“You have Death in you, Jonathan. True Death. The deal we made was not in words, but in oath. In exchange. Even your vow to Mina was a half-made thing beside it. If she had turned, you would have shielded her. Been turned. Subjected yourself to whatever Hell she was slated for—and whatever slaying your friends might bring. Or else fallen upon your kukri. I have seen the Earths where this happened. I have been Godfather Death to you in so many lives, so many ends, so many starts. I confess that this you—here, now—is the one I have grown to admire most. You do not suffer villains. But you refuse to be callous to innocents, be they human or horror.

“You do not just cull. You protect. You help. You hunt. You love. And you do not cheat. The only trouble is that you also do not rest.”

“There was hardly room or time enough to rest,” Jonathan said, trying not to watch how Lord Brighton quivered himself upright. “You must know that. The League is inundated with strange new cases, threats that could swallow the world.”

“You have heard the messages of the gods. The ones you mean to pass on. You know something of the reality already—why the uncanny upsurge now? Why not ages ago, when man was weak and ignorant of all but Nature? The gods and monsters have not changed. They quibble more with each other than spare a glance for humanity. So. If they have not changed their habits, who has?”  

Jonathan knew.

“Your habits need a change as well, for the record. Death is not just the cessation of life, after all. You can put an End to far more diverse things if you put your mind and my hand to it. And once you do, don’t go inventing new chores to soak up your time. Take a break before you break yourself, young man.” Peter Hawkins’ eyes burned hollowly. “Unless you want another out-of-body experience.”

“Ah…”

“Just a joke, son. You’ll get around to dying properly sooner or later. Everyone does. But know that my ears will be plugged and my door will be locked to any Harkers of any generation wheedling me about psychopompous work to do. In the meantime, soul form or not, I suggest you roll up your sleeves.”

Jonathan did. It scarcely helped with the Necronomicon’s retrieval. Touching the kukri served to freeze and flake away the residue from his hands. Whatever flickering blotches Lord Brighton had for eyes winked out as the steel swung down and cleaved an Ending through all the muck he had become. The steel beam of Hate sizzled so vivid a red that it colored their entire corner of Nightmare. Someplace near, a great clock tolled twelve in gothic chimes.

“And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all. Which is better than far too many alternatives. Now, steady with the blade. Shall I do it for you?”

“No,” Jonathan said, levelling the point carefully. “No, I can manage. Only, can you tell them…tell Hawkins, tell Lucy, my—my parents, tell the mother in the courtyard, tell them I—,”

“They know, son. The dead know all they need and all they want. And they know you’ll do fine. I’ll be seeing you. Though hopefully not too soon.”

With that, Jonathan Harker drove the kukri, clean and cold and full of Ending, through his chest.

 In the League’s library, chaos reigned. It was Yellow and scaled, full of theatre and madness, and all the eldritch trimmings. A collaboration had formed, supposedly led by Hildred Castaigne, supposedly followed by the Cult of Cthulhu. The Yellow Sign waved, the carved figure was raised, and the snakeskin volume of The King in Yellow was in their grasp, freshly stolen from its keep. Now they demanded the Necronomicon. The dreams had led them; the mingling of prophecies that would unfold into the new world they and their gods would own once apocalypse came to pass. The League would turn the tome over, or they would detonate the explosives already planted around the building’s exterior. Enough to level the lot.

On discovering the League did not have said Necronomicon to give, there was as much scoffing as anger.

“They are fools all. Ignorant to their own prize. Bring out the Initiate! The Hand of the Messenger! We know he was taken to his rites this day!”

Before anyone could ask for clarification, their guests erupted in a joint thrill as both their demands entered the room.

Jonathan Harker walked in and the temperature dropped twenty degrees.

He held the Necronomicon in one hand. His kukri in the other. His mouth was a bitter line that wished to deliver its first message. This he gave to the nearest empty vase. Said message came in the form of a black and rotting bile, freshly evicted from his stomach and throat in a hideous stream. It smoked and gurgled and died in the vessel.

The League gaped. The cult seemed nonplussed. Castaigne seemed only to be searching for a token of the Yellow Sign to prove a connection with his own faction.

Jonathan delivered the next message.

“Your dreams are not a lie,” he said. “They are accidents. Cthulhu does exist. He does not care what you do in his honor. He will do you no favors either way. He will not even do you any fears, because he is not a herald. A day will come, billions of years from now, when we are all dust, that the sun will burn out on its own. The Earth will freeze. Cthulhu will rise. Only then will he fly out, rekindle that star, and begin growing a garden. Until then, all he wishes is to sleep. All the visions you think are his declarations are only his dreams. Not orders. Not promises. Just dreams.”

He looked to Hildred Castaigne who retreated another step in addition to the several he had already taken back.

“The King in Yellow, both the play and its playwright, operate in terms of story, theatre, and extremity. He does not spread the books. Publishing houses and rumor and the lure of old sins are all that move the play. No one is a character in it except in the madness it might inflict. You are not in its cast. You are a victim because you wished to make a victim of your brother out of deadly jealousy that existed long before you thumbed through the play. He is no prince of Carcosa, nor are you.”

He addressed the visitors as a whole.

“The otherworldly has always existed. Even before humanity wrote myths. Even before humanity existed. Certainly before Earth in any iteration. They have not changed. Humanity has. We have grown and we have spread, and there are too many of us who go looking for the divine and the profane only to intrude or bribe or bridle, hoping to profit from gods and monsters at the cost of others. You, and so many cousins to your thinking, are why supernatural menace has been on the rise. There is no prophecy to blame, no special alignment of planets and stars—just an army of gluttons and trespassers tramping through the uncanny looking for treasure.

“It must end.”

If not how the fellows in charge of the detonators—technological marvels operating by radio wave—were expecting. These had already been disarmed. He had scented the lethality-in-waiting planted around the stonework. It had taken barely a jog and a cut apiece to ruin the fine and fatal work.

It took even less to see to the interior. He made it simple.

“I would like for some of you to live. There’s no point in sharing a message with dead men. At least not when they can’t get back up and talk again. On the other hand, you all have murder crusted under your nails. Innocent lives sacrificed to appease gods who never wanted or asked for your worship. Their dreams are ones of horror, so you assumed horror would win their good graces and boons. So, here is what will happen. You are all going to leave. In that, you have an option. You can leave by way of the police. Trials will happen. Cells will follow. Your compatriots may receive what intel I have given, or you may sit and stew on it, or you may just head to the gallows and be done with wondering.

“Or,” the bitter line of his mouth curled into an even worse smile. It had the curve of a scythe. “A special treat. A new trick I learned in crossing back here. How would you like to meet your idols in person? I can get you to them. It’s such a short walk. The only trouble is, again, worshipper or no, they will have no inclination to treat you any different from the rest of the mortal mites. But you can meet them. Right now.”

Jonathan pointed back to the lightless hall from whence he’d come with the edge of the kukri blade. It seemed darker beyond that threshold even as they looked. Cold leaked from it. The frigid breeze of Sheol. The endless night over the Styx.

“However you go, wherever you go, one thing is to be guaranteed. None of you are going to kill again. Not for a dream or a whim or a godly bribe. Because I will know. I will find you. And you will only get to die if I am feeling forgiving.”

The lamplight seemed to dim a shade. In that gloom, Jonathan Harker’s eyes became bright as fresh-struck obols.

“What will it be?”

 The police found a band of fifteen intruders waiting bound and bug-eyed at what was known to the sort of circles who gossiped about such things as, ‘The Storyteller Club.’ The title was a public creation, so-named because of the endless outlandish rumors tied to the supposed members and their doings. It was a place known almost entirely for the stories people invented about it.

Some joked that it was nothing more than some toff’s little getaway from the manse to hang about with his friends away from prying staff’s eyes. Some said the place was clogged with secret codenames and nefarious-to-scandalous dealings. Some said it was some private theatre or other, if some of the more outlandish characters were even half-right in their description. Some said it was all royals inside, or all vagabonds, or all spies, or the highest of society that even Her Majesty wasn’t in-the-know enough to visit. But the most agreed upon ‘facts’ of the Storyteller Club were that strange things always tended to happen in its vicinity and that entry to the building was excruciatingly exclusive.

Gentry and nouveau riche alike had made their attempts—Out of curiosity! For a lark!—and been universally turned away practically at the door. Lestrade and his men, it seemed, had the rare honor of being allowed the foyer, if only to collect the fresh harvest of intruders, all of whom they would find with warrants for arrest on multiple murder charges overseas, now with such petty aims as would-be burglary and a failed bombing on their hands.

“Well, suppose that’s madmen for you, isn’t it, Holmes? How is, ah,” Lestrade had gestured awkwardly about his own head, “the young man who coughed up the poison?” Said poison was still clotted and smoldering in the vase. Two very unhappy policemen had triple-wrapped it in linen and spared some clean gauze to go over their mouths and noses. It was a mutual agreement that a scientist or two could have a peek at it before it would be unceremoniously ‘lost in a small fire.’

“Mr. Harker is doing much better now that he hasn’t been left in so poor a condition he could be taken for dead. Mrs. Harker feels much the same.”

It was quite some work getting husband and wife to unlock from each other long enough to answer any questions. Even then they would not unfasten enough to release one another’s hand.

“It was all quite bizarre, Inspector. As soon as the door was shut, Lord Brighton had his man aim his pistol between my eyes. Being that a knife is no match for a bullet, I stayed where I was while Lord Brighton talked. He kept saying something about how I knew his ‘secret name’ was Q and all this surreal talk of killing death and fealty to what I assume were gods he’d either invented or dug up in a history text. Somehow I had figured into his ideas as a sacrifice of some kind. He told me my options were to drink that awful swill or be shot dead. I drank and became as good as dead anyway. As to my neck?” He rubbed the scabbing wound unhappily. “I could not say. My mind quite shut down after swallowing the muck. Were there any strange animals found?”

“None but the bastard at your doorway and the lord who’s got away. Near as we can figure, Lord Brighton took a ‘no witnesses’ approach to whatever mad hobby he was playing out. Once the doctors finish analyzing what’s left of Mr. Davies—a fellow with his own proud resumé of bloody business—I’ll eat my hat if they don’t come up with a less artful toxin in his system. Seems you got the exclusive treatment and he got the bum’s rush. None of your workers saw anyone pass out the door either, so the hounds will be at work trying to trace the codger from your office window. No luck yet. Even these lot you corralled, they haven’t said word one about Brighton, though they’ve plenty of unholy chatter on their past arrest records.”

“Well,” Jonathan shrugged, “perhaps it’s a holiday for them. A fine day for sacrificing. There may be something about it in here.” His free hand settled unhappily on the cover of the Necronomicon. “Though I think it would be better for your sleep if you didn’t. It’s one rare volume we are sorry to have borrowed from Professor Derleth.”

“In hindsight,” Mina frowned, “perhaps it was that very thing that marked you, darling. We are collectors and scribblers of esoteric works here. Professor Derleth deigned to lend us this while he was on holiday. We were due to return it before he left, but now it seems…”

“Oh, hell,” Lestrade pinched at his nose and shook his head. “Has this whole circus been over some lunatic bookworms’ squabble while hunting down a collector’s edition?

“We really couldn’t say, Inspector. Only that this and a copy of The King in Yellow we had under lock and key was also targeted. We’ve never cracked the cover, thank goodness, so we cannot say if it’s a real edition or just a prop. But superstition and a rare find deserved a spot in our collection; if not our reading circulation. Somehow word must have gotten out.”

“Reading circulation?”

“Oh, yes,” Mrs. Norton chimed in. “We’re something of a book club in here.”

“History hobbyists as well,” from Professor Van Helsing.

“Conservationists,” from Mr. Morris and the much-improved Mr. Holt.

“Sometimes,” Dr. Seward hummed, “they even let us doctors hide under words like, ‘debate’ and ‘discussion’ when we’re having a proper row.”

“A dialogue,” Dr. Jekyll corrected.

“I just come here when someone brings around a new pet,” Lord Godalming shrugged.

“They make an excellent resource, this lot,” Holmes hummed around his pipe. “If not for scholarly bric-a-brac, then for the blessed relief Watson and I can find away from the doldrums that pass between cases. Well. Until recently. It seems too many a rumor have run rampant about this place and we’ve been built up in the imagination as a site worth harassing with obscure pantheons. I suppose we’ll have some Maenads knocking at the door next.”

“Well, it’d go a fair way to help your lot’s case if they knew you were just a gaggle of academics shutting yourself in a box to natter over Dickinson and Darwin. God’s sake.” Lestrade scrubbed a hand over his face a last time and seemed to wish his other hand held a stein. “Right. Mr. Harker? We’d appreciate your tagging along as proof to our mortician that you’re livelier than advertised. We’ll need to halt the march of your death certificate before it can reach newsprint.”

Both Harkers, and Holmes, and Watson, and damn near half the members of the Storyteller Club—soon to leak out to the public ear as, ha!, the Storybook Club—invited themselves along. Jonathan Harker proved himself to be sufficiently alive, but with insufficient circulation and, to judge by a half-second examination of his eyes, operating on incredibly insufficient sleep.

“I know. I would have worked myself to death eventually if I hadn’t been forced to drink myself there today. I mean to take a proper holiday after taking a very long nap. But before I go—,”

“I’m not the medical man to talk to about a prescription.”

“No, not that. I should like to see someone you have here. I was told I should take a second look at him to see if it might jog any memory from before,” he cleared his throat, “everything. If perhaps I or the others were being followed.”

Joseph Davies was on the slab waiting. The carving had already begun. Pieces examined in tandem with the bloody foam of the mouth. No matter how many times the eyelids were pulled shut, they fluttered open. Blind, they still saw. Dead, the man still pleaded.

The mortician curled his lip at the sight of him.

“I’ve mopped up more than a fair share of souls this bastard sent me. I hope they’re all lined up waiting to give back what he gave them in Hell.”

“He does deserve Hell.” Jonathan scarcely noticed how the mortician shivered beside him, gooseflesh and the hair on his nape standing out all at once. He laid a cool hand upon the table. Its cold spread from him to its cargo. “But not this one.”

The eyes saw no more. The dead man did not plead.

Later, the mortician would see two coins left behind on the slab.

Pennies.

 Lord Henry Wotton had a new visitor shadowing Dorian Gray. Jonathan Harker was given leave to inspect the padded interior of the cell and he came to a stop near a high corner. There was a small, nearly imperceptible slit in the padding. From it, he worked a gorgeous, yet somehow unpleasant brooch of black gem and gold sigil. A Yellow Sign, even. He made a note to deposit it in the nearest graveyard.

“My, my. However did that get up there?”

“Wotton.”

“Harker. Is this when you evict me from the party? I am curious how you’ll manage with these witnesses and no dashing blade at your hip. I suppose you might do it with your hands.”

“Yes, with my hands.” So saying, Dorian, Jack, and a number of anxious attendants watched on as he laid an icy palm against Wotton’s brow. The air crisped as he pantomimed sliding off a masquerade disguise. “It’s not just the end of the party, Lord Wotton. The story is over, the curtain has fallen.” A strange light came and went in Jonathan’s eyes as he whispered, “The End.”

“Oh, but wouldn’t that be so neat? So easy? If you…if it would just…just end and…” Muscles twitched and ticked and loosened in his face, the default sardonic smile finally going lax. A glassy shine polished the bloodshot and half-jaundiced eyes. “Oh. Oh, God. He isn’t there. None of it is there.” The noise that followed could not be separated between laughter or sobbing. There would be time enough for him differentiate them once he was on the other side of the asylum walls. It goes without guessing that Wotton no longer frequented society circles afterward, nor did he have a cent to spare for theatrical endeavors.

It was said, however, that he made a sizable annual donation to the mysterious-to-mundane function of the Storybook, née, Storyteller Club.

“No,” he would be quoted sometime later. “I am not trying to bribe my way into their ranks. Rather, I am paying them to keep themselves and their work as far from myself and the public as possible.”

 Transylvania saw another visit. A remote corner of old memories. Jonathan found the remains of every man that had been scattered by elements and animals with the ease of a bloodhound. These they buried, but not before Jonathan had laid a cold palm on each of them. The wind sounded like sighs.

 In Wales, the people of Caermaen and the Grey Hills who had been fighting unsuccessfully to forestall the purchase and development of their verdant old acres and stones, found themselves with unexpected champions flocking from the same English corners that had wanted to tear the turf up and crowd more cities in. The emptied pockets of lords, doctors, world renowned professors, and a trio of volunteer solicitors who possessed all the wit and will of the Devil himself descended like locusts upon the would-be land barons and their shoddy contracts.

Before the season was out, the buyers were booted and the entire undeveloped terrain was cordoned off as a protected nature reserve, not to be encroached upon by any form of human expansion. A change that was made clear almost to the point of seeming excessive to the locals.

If only to reach the ears underground as well as above.

The night before they left, Jonathan Harker went to the wardrobe of his room at the inn, and found a surprise waiting. One he very cautiously, very quietly, invited his companions to see before they saw about removal. Jack Seward had to sit down for a long while. Van Helsing sat with him.

Dr. Arthur Raymond, amateur lobotomist to his adoptive daughter and innumerable other girls, source of the alchemical White Powder lacing spree in the Burbage chemical supplier chain, self-styled worshipper of Pan and his Peoples, and the man who had almost sliced a sliver of bone and brain out of Jack Seward’s skull to fill it with that same ancient drug as an experiment, was left beside Jonathan Harker’s shoes in the wardrobe. At least, the doctor above the neck.

His face was locked in a rictus of terror. It held in place especially well with the stone jar full of reconstituted White Powder jamming his jaw open until it broke. The eyes were no longer eyes so much as black-green pus. The language of Ixaxar, the Black Seal, was used to carve a red message across the man’s temple. The translation:

DOCTOR SAW THE GOD HE SHOWED TO MANY.

HE SEES FOREVER.

WORK DONE. NOISE GONE. GO DEEP NOW.

THANKS GIVEN TO PALE MAN OF DEATH.

 DREAM GOOD.

 The head was burned. The White Powder with it.

 Soon the world quieted its supernal rumbles. The League collectively relaxed by several increments. The Nautilus even went back to deeper seas and discovered, improbably, that the sunken city they had visited had flickered out of existence once more, like the vapor of a dream. Notably, this was after Captain Nemo began a sea monstrous campaign against the fellows working to build the first oil drilling structure off the coast of California. A similar industrial endeavor was foiled by, just as absurd in the newspapers’ opinion, a horde of fish people dismantling the operation in the night.

Odd times abounded. But not as worrisomely odd as they had been.

Meanwhile, Jonathan Harker slept in for the first time since he woke from his drugged fog in the care of the nuns. He did so with relish. He did so with vigor. He did so with Mina Harker watching for the first sign of nightmare, of his breath gone too still, of anything and everything else that might try to shatter the vision of peace drooling into the pillow beside her. Nothing did. She watched him anyway.

It had been her longest running hobby since they first made the leap of settling into the same bed. Doubly so when the worst of Dracula’s menace was thrust on them. But the habit never went away even in tranquil hours. A silver-white curl fell over his face. She tucked it away behind his ear and then let her palm rest on his cheek. Cool, but not cold. How odd that it reassured her now. He had apologized to her for his condition in a dozen ways despite her insistence that it did not matter. His temperature only plummeted when he was ‘at work.’ He certainly thawed a great deal during play, as their holiday had illustrated on more than one night. Afternoon. Once or twice after tea.

“It’s another sign of you now,” she’d told him. “It proves you’re in there.”

He always found it hard to believe her. She always found it easy to prove. So it went. So it would go for as long as they could fight for it. Griffin had muttered in passing that he could no longer tell if Jonathan was the most or least lucky man alive. Even the ‘alive’ part seemed always to be in limbo.

The hand not on Jonathan’s cheek moved down to her stomach and she smiled.

I beg to differ, Dr. Griffin.

“Mina?” The voice fell dreamily out of him. His hand floated up to cover her own, sandwiching her warmth in his skin.

 “I’m here.”

 “Good. Good,” he murmured to the pillow. “Quin seer loosey…”

 “What?” she laughed. “Jonathan, are you awake or not?”

“No.” He blinked at her and scrubbed his mouth clean. “Yes. I think. Sorry, I was talking with someone.”

He did do that on occasion now. Fell asleep and kept in some kind of action. Walking and talking. Sometimes they were only dreams. Sometimes the dreams were more. But even in sleep, the young man refused to be still. Even if he did rest.

“Who with?”

“Mutual friend. I’ve had my suspicions for a while, and I wanted to see if she might have inside information. She did.”

“What did she say?”

“She sends oceans of love and millions of kisses.” Jonathan laid her hand against his lips. “And she insists that our first choice for names should be Quincey or Lucy.”        

 Somewhere, someone writes a world. Another. A hundred. The faces in them are old and new and forever and fresh.

They are made of pencil and paper, button and screen.

They are heroes and villains and gods and monsters and character and friend and fiend and fantastic all over.

They will live.

They will die.

Death will die, now and then, and bring them back for another story, for better or worse.

But here and now—a now that can last as long we like, for time passes differently in the dream of our world—they are happy. They love and are loved. And all that is weird and wonderful awaits them.

-FIN-

#so ends the trilogy of Jonathan Harker VS Weird Old Dudes #in case you didn't guess my Christmas gift from me to me is Not Editing These Giant Bastard Block of Text #this is a whole novella I pulled out in a week #I'll edit it when I feel like it* #*never #hope you guys enjoy the read #you're going to be here for a while #now on to the cast list #jonathan harker #dracula (But Is He?) #dracula #(the novel) #mina harker #the great god pan #cthulhu #the king in yellow #lord henry wotton #the inmost light #the novel of the black seal #arthur machen #ambrose bierce #an inhabitant of carcosa #sherlock holmes #the yellow sign #captain nemo #pierre aronnax #20000 leagues under the sea #and too many more to cram in here I'M TIRED #the league of extraordinary gentlefolk #The Adventures of Jonathan Harker and the Strange Old Men

[godslush]

At the very least, for my Mega Man followers, here's this butthead I drew at work on scratch paper with colored sharpies and embellished with white ink at home later

#art #fanart #mega man #rockman #mega man 2 #heat man #ロックマン #ヒートマン #dai's mega man dump

[nightmareworks]

GRIMM & SONS

i'm just gonna post some teaser stuff from the Lancer book me and @moiderahart are workin on bc i can

G&S - BUNYAN

Defender

When the Clanners seek to tame a world, truly tame it and make it part of their sprawling Promised Land, they send Bunyan. Built for size and strength above all else, Bunyan is a titanic defender whose bulk is meant to labor constructing the kinds of mega-infrastructure projects G&S is famous for. Colonopoli, trainyards, orbital elevators, whatever a burgeoning little frontier needs! It's said that three Bunyans, working for a year and a day, can build an entire Core-Level cityscape; before they settle down and link their coldcores to the power-grid and light it themselves. In G&S Colonies, the shape of Bunyan frames “enshrined” as power-stations are a common sight. Bunyan is famous for its “roomy” cockpit, designed and shaped after the single-person living spaces aboard the ancient Armstrong and allowing a single pilot to undergo months without resupply or replacement.

In matters of military necessity, the Bunyan frame excels in using its size, power, and inbuilt Ballistic/Advanced Barrier Enhancement Drone to keep its allies in the fight and aggressors on the back foot. What are the teeth of a Vast, when compared to armor of adamant? What are the bullets of pirates, when compared to an axe’s honest steel? What are the dangers of all the galaxy, compared to the strength of a man fighting to protect what he’s built? Bunyan stands, towering in its pride and power, above the fray. Planets break before his pilots do.

Ballistic/Advanced Barrier Enhancement Drone

The Ballistic/Advanced Barrier Enhancement (BABE) Drone is some of the fanciest tech G&S has ever managed to get off the ground without it going up in flames on them, creating a portable Warp-Shield derived from the GMS Type-II. The frankly massive and clunky drone manages to output powerful shield to defend its core Frame from incoming fire through its Warp-Shield, but most pilots see fit to use it to help their friends. G&S knows its customer base well, and the full production line of Bunyan includes a built-in BABE drone, capable of being supercharged with a dump from the coldcore. The tell-tale blue is your friend, pilot, trust in BABE and he’ll bring your lance home.

Passive: BABE Drone (Size 1, 20Hp, 8ev, 8edef, Tags: Drone) Quick Action The Bunyan may deploy the BABE Drone as a protocol to any free space within its Sensor Range at the start of the Scene. When you move, it may also move the same distance but it may not Boost. When an ally within 3 of the Drone is hit by an attack, the BABE Drone may use a reaction to give the allied character resistance to one type of damage (Energy, Kinetic, Explosive). You may reposition the drone to any unoccupied space within your Sensor Range with a Quick Action on your turn.

Active (requires 1 Core Power): Big Blue Friend

Quick Action

You place your BABE Drone in an unoccupied space within your sensor range, it generates a Burst 3 shield that is bubble-shaped. Any attempts to enter or exit the shield through movement of any sort must roll 1d6, on a 4+ the movement fails and the moving character takes 3 Kinetic Damage that cannot be reduced. Any attack (tech, melee, ranged) that crosses the barrier must roll a d6, on a 4+ the attack fails. You may reposition the drone to any unoccupied space within your Sensor Range with a Quick Action on your turn.

#mecha #lancer rpg #homebrew #lancer homebrew #Grimm & Sons

[justforbooks]

Deadly Game, the debut novel from Michael Caine, will be published in the UK and US in November, it has been announced.

The actor, 90, has long harboured the desire to write a thriller, and was inspired to do so by a news item, says his UK publisher, Hodder’s Rowena Webb, about “the discovery of uranium by workers on a dump in London’s East End”. The novel’s lead character is DCI Harry Taylor, who, according to the synopsis, is “called in when just such a package is found, mysteriously abandoned in Stepney and stolen before the police can reclaim it. As security agencies around the world go to red alert, it is former SAS man Harry and his small team from the Met who must race against time to find who has the nuclear material and what they plan to do with it.”

Key suspects in the case include “the aristocratic English art dealer Julian Smythe” and “mega-rich Russian Vladimir Voldrev”. The plot also involves “British neo-Nazis and Colombian drug cartels”, leaving Harry “just the man to cut through the red tape and get to the heart of an extraordinary criminal enterprise”.

Says Hodder fiction editor Nick Sayers: “When Rowena and I met Sir Michael last year, I discovered that he is not only a lifelong reader of thrillers, but also an author bursting with ideas for fiction of his own. Deadly Game is a cracking thriller with a real voice and a super twist.”

Caine discussed the novel, which he wrote during lockdown, in an interview with the Guardian in 2021, when the title was still If You Don’t Want to Die.

“I only read thrillers,” he told Xan Brooks. “I’m an adventure man, I’m not a literature person, so I’m not trying to replace Shakespeare here. But it’s based on something I once read about two dustmen, two rubbish collectors in the East End. And they find uranium in the rubbish.”

One of the best known and most beloved British film stars of the past 60 years, Caine has appeared in more than 130 films, including Zulu, Alfie, The Italian Job and Sleuth.

He won supporting actor Oscars for his performances in Hannah and Her Sisters and The Cider House Rules, and more recently has collaborated with the director Christopher Nolan.

Caine himself hails from south-east London, and has six times played a character called Harry, most notably in The Ipcress File and its sequels, and in 2009’s Harry Brown.

He will next be soon alongside Glenda Jackson in The Great Escaper, based on the real-life story of a second world war veteran who fled his care home to attend the D-Day anniversary in Normandy in 2014.

Other actors who have recently tried their hand at fiction include Ethan Hawke, David Duchovny, Hugh Laurie, Sean Penn and Tom Hanks.

📷 Photo Above: Michael Caine in the 2021 film Best Sellers

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

#JUST FOR BOOKS #Michael Caine #Deadly Game

[auteurdelabre]

A LITTLE SUN - PART FOUR Dieter x f!Reader

rating: 18+ (MINORS GET OUTTA HERE OR I'M TELLIN'!)

Story Summary: As a PA to megastar and mega man-child Dieter Bravo you've had your fair share of headaches. Getting accidentally pregnant with his baby however takes the cake, especially when he offers to pay you to be his surrogate. You just weren't expecting to fall in love with him along the way.

Chapter summary: The secret is out. . . And you both have to face the music.

tags: Surrogacy, Pregnancy, Body changes re: pregnancy, Mutual Pining, Idiots in love, Mentions of Drugs, Mentions of Parental Death, Parental Issues, Vulnerable Dieter, Vulnerable Reader.

dividers by @silkholland

a/n: Next chapter is... gonna be a doozy.

part one / part two / part three

"Tell me it isn't true."

"Huh?"

You roll over in bed, wiping the sleep from your eyes. Your cell is firmly lodged against your ear as your mother’s frantic cry is heard on the other end. It’s early the morning after the ultrasound and you’re still reeling from everything. There are soft pings going off on your phone, but all are drowned out by your mother’s terrified voice. 

After the kiss you and Dieter had been driven back to the rental in silence, both of you processing. You were pensive, staring down at your phone reading through work emails. Dieter on the other hand was beaming, his smile never dimming.

He’d tried to talk to you when you entered into the rental but you’d made a beeline for your bedroom where you’d fallen into an unsettled sleep. And now you have your mother screaming down the line at you as you blurrily try to understand what she’s going on about.

"People haven’t stopped calling,” your mom says her voice wobbling. "I keep hanging up but now they're on the lawn!"

"Mom what are you-"

"Tell me you're not having that horrible man's baby!"

It feels like a cold bucket of water has been dumped over your head sending icy chills down your spine. You jerk up in bed, your eyed bulging.

"What did you just say?"

You pull the phone from your ear and see all the pings and alerts that haven’t stopped. While you were sleeping it turns out you have been making headlines back home in the US. TMZ is of course the one to break the news, photos of you and Dieter splashes all over the internet.

Dieter Bravo makes PA his sex slave

There you both are, standing in the parking lot of the hospital. Dieter is smiling at you sweetly, his hand splayed over your belly. Your mid laugh and the two of you appear to have eyes only for each other. 

The next shot is the kiss – the one with your hand on his neck, his hand on your belly and both of you with your eyes shut. The level of intimacy in the photo is staggering to the point that just looking at it makes your face heat. 

How did they get that shot?

“Mom, I have to go,” you tell her breathlessly, hanging up on her still shrieking voice.

"DIETER! GET THE FUCK IN HERE!"

The day is long and by the evening the two of you have turned off your phones. The pings of incoming messages and phone calls are getting to be too much. Diane has scheduled an early meeting with the two of you tomorrow to discuss further steps.

You settle into the TV room, putting on some nature documentary but neither of you is watching it. You're seated by the fire, eyes lost in the flames.

Dieter is stretched out on the sofa, one arm behind his head, the other on his belly. He looked like a lost child, dark eyes wide and unblinking. He’s run his hands through his hair so much that it’s even more wild and mussed than usual.  Eventually when the silence grows oppressive you glance over at him.

"Was Mia pissed?" 

"She hadn't replied to any of my messages." 

Good. 

You don't know where that thought comes from, but it does. A strange sense of victory threads through your body, making you tingle pleasantly. But then your eyes drift over to Dieter still looking anxiously up at the ceiling and guilt soars through you. 

"Are you upset?"

"Of course I'm upset," Dieter snaps. "I really liked her. She's funny and chill and me being a single dad didn't bug her. She wanted me."

You say nothing. You watch as he throws his arm over his eyes, mouth curling into a frown. 

"And the shitty thing is I was gonna tell her when we got back to LA," Dieter sighs. "Fuck."

"I'm sorry," you offer in a quiet voice. Dieter’s eyes are immediately on your face. He sees you turned away from him. 

"What're you sorry for?"

You can't face him. You just shrug instead, feeling the queasy sensation of sentimentality. 

"I fucked it up for you."

Dieter is off the couch and crawling over to you without thinking. His long legs carry him clumsily until he’s kneeling at your feet.

"You didn't," Dieter says with that husky earnestness you’ve come to expect from him. You don't respond and he furrows his brows. "Hey, look at me."

You shake your head. You don't want to look at him. Dieter hates talking to people without seeing their eyes, it makes him uneasy. He doesn't see the irony in him constantly wearing sunglasses. He moves his fingers to your chin, gently tilting your face in his direction. 

"You did nothing wrong," 

"I kissed you."

"You were excited."

"But I kissed you," you repeat. 

"And I kissed you," Dieter offers without thinking before stumbling over his tongue as his words finally hit his brain. "It's like the first time you were excited about the baby and I loved sharing that with you."

He holds your gaze as you hold your breath. 

"I don't regret that moment. I wouldn't change it." His hand slips from your chin to your jaw, his thumb brushing against your cheek.

His face is so close to yours you can smell the cologne he spritzed to cover up the smell of cigarettes. You can see the length of his dark eyelashes. You force your eyes not to drift to his pouty mouth. 

"Even if it fucks up everything with you and Mia?"

Dieter goes to respond to you when a loud bang sounds on the front door. The two of you break apart and Dieter groans as he stands muttering about his knees. You move to the seat by the window, not up for talking to whatever company Dieter has invited over but not wanting to be in your stuffy bedroom. 

"Mia?"

You turn as Dieter says her name. Mia shoves past Dieter into the rental without taking the time to say a word to him. Her hair is wild from the wind outside and her jacket hangs on the crooks of her elbows. Despite everything she still looks glamorous. She spies you sitting near one of the windows with wide eyes. 

"Hi," you offer weakly. 

Dieter steps forward to follow Mia towards you but you wave him away. He shifts back, hanging awkwardly by the front door as the two women in his life meet eyes. Mia is staring at you harshly, her hand going to motion towards your belly.

"It's his isn't it?" Mia demands breathlessly.

You think of denying it but you know she doesn't deserve it. You hang your head, chin touching your chest. 

"Yes."

"Fuck," Mia says shaking her head. "I'm such a fucking idiot."

"You're not!" You insist, struggling to a stand. The blanket that had been draped over your belly falls to the ground. 

Mia's eyes rove your expanded stomach, noticing the pronounced swell under your tight t-shirt more easily than the last time she saw you. Her eyes widen and you feel the need to explain before she starts screaming or crying.

"It was a one night stand," you explain in a rush. 

"One where you got pregnant and are keeping the baby," Mia says flatly. "Doesn't sound like a casual one night thing to me."

"Dieter is paying me."

Mia's reaction is as expected: confused and then horrified. Her perfectly manicured nails slide over her mouth in distress. 

"What?"

"Dieter, get Mia a drink," you throw over Mia's shoulder. You need him to stop standing there staring at you like a bump on a log. You look back to Mia. "Please, just come sit down and let's talk about this." 

Dieter scrambles, knocking into one of the chairs before scampering off into the kitchen, relieved to have something to do. 

Mia looks to be debating your offer before nodding. She follows you to the large tufted chairs by the window, taking the one opposite you. 

"I don't even know why I'm here," Mia laughs ruefully, not able to meet you sympathetic gaze. "It's not like... I don't..."

She fumbles for the words that you already know and you give a chagrined smile. 

"Because you like him," you tell her.

"We barely know one another," she says to her chapped hands. “We haven’t even slept together.”

She nestles back into the chair like a delicate bird making home in a nest. Dieter rushes over with two full glasses of red wine. He presses one into Mia's hand, wincing at her cool appraisal of him. His hand extends the wineglass towards you before he realizes the faux pas. 

"Oh fuck," Dieter says wincing. "I didn't-"

"Its fine," you say rolling your eyes. "You drink it," you motion to the sofa across the room when Dieter goes to perch on the arm of your chair, "over there!"

Dieter nods, shuffling quickly away from you, the wine spilling in like drops after him like a bloody trail. He places the wineglass onto the coffee table with a quiet knock. 

You glance over Mia's body tucked tightly into the chair. She looks so haunted, so defeated that it breaks your heart. Yes, you can admit that there is a part of you that is jealous of her relationship but you know that it's just hormones. Ultimately you want Dieter happy and Mia makes him happy. 

"Mia," you say her name softly, leaning forward conspiratorially as her large eyes turn on you. "You and Dieter have a strong connection."

She gives a scoff into her wineglass. "Right."

"I've seen the two of you," you insist. "You bring out the best in him. You seem happy when you're with him."

"He makes me laugh," Mia relents. 

You try not to notice Dieter's head poking up from the couch, his eyes flitting from you to Mia and back again. 

"Don't let this," you motion to your expanded belly, "get in the way of that." 

"You say it like it's not a big deal," Mia says with a distressed laugh, her hand gesturing to your belly. "It's a child you two made together!"

"It’s a business transaction," you say firmly. "Dieter wanted to be a dad, I got pregnant, he offered to pay and I accepted. That's how non-emotional the entire thing was. I never wanted kids."

Mia twists the stem of her wineglass between her fingers anxiously. The drink sloshes against the sides hypnotically. 

"Why would you do this?" Mia finally asks you gently. "If you never wanted kids, I mean. This is a big ask."

You know she doesn't believe you and you don't know how to convince her other than giving her all the brutal facts. You exhale slowly, lips pressing together tightly. 

"Because I have significant debt," you tell her leaning back into the chair. "And when Dieter offered me a very generous payment to carry the child to term I didn't want to turn it down."

You try to sound clinical and detached as you explain this. Dieter's eyes flicked to your face when you mentioned the debt, his brows raised. Now he just continues looking uncertainly between you and Mia. 

"You're not going to want to be in this baby's life at all?" Mia asks, brow furrowed. "You're just going to go work for Dieter every day and ignore your own baby?"

The way she says this sounds judgmental. Like you're a monster for choosing this. It makes your hackles rise momentarily before you remember that she's come here to understand everything. You smooth down the pillow absently, grounding yourself.  

"I won't be working for Dieter after I give birth," you explain in a rush, avoiding the way Dieter's eyes move sharply to your face. "I'll pay off my debts and then I'm going back to school to finish my schooling. I won't even be in the same city."

You hide a wince when you see Dieter's hurt expression behind Mia's shoulder at this proclamation. You know he’d been upset when you mentioned Sacramento in passing, but now he just looks devastated.

Mia blinks rapidly, looking even more thrown then before. "You won't?"

"Nope." You shake your head before giving a tepid smile. "But that means I won't be there to get in the way either. No random run ins, no having to pretend things aren't totally fucking awkward."

Mia gives a small smile at this

“It also means that your relationship with Dieter would be public news,” you tell her quietly. “It means tabloids running things about you being a stepmom. It means a lot of unwanted attention.”

“I could give a fuck about that,” Mia says rolling her eyes. “They said I didn’t have a belly button last year. I don’t care what they print about me. I just signed an airtight three picture deal with Marvel.”

You want to laugh at how you pinned Mia as this innocent little waif who didn’t know what she was getting into. How wrong you were. She’s more shrewd and worldly than most fifty year olds you know in the business.  Suddenly your fears about her being too innocent, about her career being damaged, are pushed to the side.

But her smile drops and she jerks her head behind her to glare at a solemn looking Dieter who now stands braced against the edge of his couch. She places her empty wineglass next to her on the floor.

"You lied to me, Dee."

"I told him to," you break in before your boss can reply. "I begged him not to tell anyone. Even you."

Mia turns back around, brow raised. "Why?"

"Because I was involved in a one night stand with my boss," you say with a dejected scoff. "And I got pregnant from it. From the man the media once called Burnout Bravo. I was humiliated. I didn’t want anyone to know. My own mother didn’t even know until TMZ came out with it."

Dieter feels his heart sink as you say this. The truth that he always suspected so brutally delivered makes him feel like he's been punched in the gut. Burnout Bravo.

Mia begins twisting her fingers together nervously. "Really?"

"Really," you nod before shooting a look over at Dieter that says play along. 

"It's the truth," Dieter says hollowly. 

"So there's no feelings here?" Mia asks the both of you. 

You're the first to reply with a laugh you force from the bottom of your belly. 

"No. Never. It was a one night stand because we were drunk and because I hadn't been laid in months. That's all it was."

"Yeah," Dieter says laughing the same sharp way you do. "I don't fuck my employees. We were wasted." 

That stings. To be referred to as an employee and so carelessly. But it’s what needs to be done. The two of them fit together. You lean closer to Mia, dropping your voice so that only she can hear you.

“Mia what you two have is special,” you emphasize. “I’m not just saying that. I’ve known Dieter for years. You’re the first one I’ve really seen make him change for the better.”

Mia seems to soften at this and you watch as Mia pushes up from the chair and draws over to Dieter. He stands and she allows him to pull her into his arms. He closes his eyes as he holds her against him. She murmurs something into his neck and the moment suddenly feels incredibly intimate.

You feel your intruding on the two of them and you shuffle past them into your bedroom, closing the door quietly behind you.

Back in the kitchen Mia pulls back slightly to gaze up at Dieter.  "Do you want her, Dieter?"

"What?" Dieter blinks rapidly. "You already asked me that and-"

"And now she's not in the room with us," Mia finishes, peering into Dieter's face. "And I want your total honesty." 

Total honesty.

He can't give her that. Can't tell her how you occupy his thoughts at all times. Can't tell her that even if you weren't carrying his child he's crazy about you. Can't tell her that he's so touched that you care about him well past that of a personal assistant. Can't tell her that he's told you things no one knows because he trusts you more than anyone. 

And he can't tell her those things because he really cares for Mia, more than he ever expected to. If things continue between the two of them there's a very good chance he's going to fall in love with her because right now he's well on his way. 

He doesn't want to give her up. 

His affection for you will wane. When you leave for school he'll be able to forget you. You don't want him so why would he pin his affections on that?

He needs to move on from you. 

"No," Dieter says firmly. "It's not like that. I mean of course I care about her. She's been my assistant for years and she's carrying my kid." 

"You know that's not what I mean," Mia says flatly, her light eyes scanning his face. Dieter stares into those eyes, feeling himself melt. 

Mia is sweet and ambitious and she likes to party. She's got an edge, a relaxed way of being and she's fucking gorgeous. She's an actress so of course there's a bit of ego but that's nothing he can't handle. If anything he likes it about her. 

Mia had been so understanding, so cool. Dieter could feel himself falling harder and harder for her the longer they were together. Part of him thinks she suggested the casual nature of the relationship because that's all she thought he was capable of. She gets him in a lot of ways. 

But you’re here and you're carrying his child and even if you weren't, after breaking down the walls you keep up these past few months, Dieter doesn't know that he can stop wanting you. It doesn't make sense; you don't want him like that so why does he still desire you? 

He needs to quit it though. If he doesn't watch himself he's going to lose Mia and he doesn't want that. 

"I want you," Dieter finishes softly, cupping her cheek. 

Mia slides her manicured hand over Dieter's wrist, sighing as she looks up at him. 

"I think maybe we need to take a beat Dee."

"Huh? Why?"

Dieter can't understand what she's talking about. They're going at a glacial pace. He hasn't even taken her to bed yet. Something that would have bothered him in past relationships, but for this one just feels right.

"Because I need some time to think things over," Mia tells him gently. "This is a lot to take in."

Dieter frowns. "But, I like being with you."

"And I like being with you," Mia assures him with a smile. "But I need to wrap my head around this. I know why you did what you did, but I need to sit with it and let you know how I feel."

She’s dumping him.

Dieter isn’t an idiot. He’s done this song and dance in his time. He knows by the tentative way she meets his eyes, the way her hand stays lightly on his wrist. She’s softening the blow, he realizes.

"If that's what you want," he manages. He won’t force a woman to be with him. And despite everything he’s glad he met Mia.

"It is," Mia nods. She stands on tiptoe to press a kiss to his lips, smiling as she pulls back. "I better get back to the hotel. I have an early day on set tomorrow. Not all of us were lucky enough to finish wrapping their scenes."

"The price of being the lead," Dieter grins. Mia giggles, going to pull on her jacket before giving him a brief wave.

“I’ll see you later, Dee.”

You're in bed when Mia leaves, half dozing on your side. You’ve just removed the headphones from your belly and you’re ready to fall into a hopefully long sleep. You start when the door to your room creaks opens and Dieter steps inside, creeping over to your bed.

"Hey," you whisper in the dark. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," Dieter nods, unbuttoning his shirt. "We talked it out."

"Okay. Good."

The shirt is dropped to the ground, followed quickly by his jeans. Wearing only his boxers he stills, realizing he's not in his room but yours. 

"Did you... Can I sleep in here?"

"In here?" 

"Yeah," Dieter says and you can hear the insecurity there. 

"Sure," you say pulling back the covers. "If you can fit in this narrow bed with me and my stomach."

"I'll fit," Dieter grins. 

You feel him slip under the covers, shifting nearer to you until his breathing is fanning over the back of your neck.

His hand tentatively rests at your hip, tensing. He remembers last time the two of you were together in bed, you snuggling up to him, kissing his shoulder, holding him. There was nothing sexual about it, just comforting. He wants that again. 

"Would," he starts, feeling embarrassed. "Would it-"

"What?"

"Would it be okay if I held you? Not trying anything," he quickly adds which makes you smile in the dark. "I just like holding him." 

Your smile fades. He doesn't want to hold you. He wants to hold the baby.

Of course he does. 

You want to quell the beating of your heart. You want to remind yourself that this is transactional. 

But more than that you want to be held by him. 

You want to inhale the scent of his cologne and feel the ridge of his nose grazing your neck. You want to feel his hand curl against your stomach. And most of all you want to fall asleep with the man who helped you to create this life you carry.

"Yeah," you shuffle back against him. "I'm sure he misses you."

It's a silly thing to say especially since the baby doesn't even know it’s a baby yet. But Dieter grins at the comment, holding you. 

"I missed him," he murmurs, hand grazing softly against your abdomen. 

Guilt gnaws away at you though. 

"Would Mia be okay knowing you're in here?" You whisper in the darkness. "I mean, I know nothing is happening, I just mean... You know."

"Yeah. Pretty sure she dumped me." Dieter supplies.  He feels you tense in his arms, tilting your head over your shoulder to stare up at him concerned.

"What? Really?" 

"Yeah," you feel Dieter shifting behind you, his large arm coming to wrap tighter around your waist. "Says she needs time to process everything." 

“Doesn’t sound like breaking up.”

“Trust me,” Dieter sighs. “I know a break up monologue when I hear it. I’ve given enough of them.”

“Oh.”

You think on this, hand sliding under your pillow. Dieter sounds resigned, like this isn't necessarily something he wants. 

"You're okay with it, Dieter?"

"Yeah." 

"Maybe it was for the best," you offer, trying to cheer him up. "I don't know that monogamy was ever your thing." 

The moment stretches between you both, the room quiet. Dieter has found your left hand, his thumb coming to absently rub the ring you wear there. The ring he bought you that you never take off. The ring that if you knew how much it cost you would never wear for fear of losing it. He loves seeing it on your finger, knowing that something he bought you ties you to him in some way. 

"For the right person it would be," Dieter finally offers in a soft rasp. Before you can say anything he's flicking the lamp next to the bed off. 

"G'night." 

"Night."

Dieter wakes the next morning when the scent of your perfume on the pillow. He cracks his eyes open to see the bed empty and he feels a stab of disappointment. 

He showers before pulling on his clothes and robe and padding into the kitchen. You're sitting there, backlit by the sun and when you look up from your cereal bowl and cast a bright smile in his direction he feels momentarily breathless. 

You’re so fucking beautiful.

"Morning, ready for a painfully long flight home tonight?"

"Y-yeah," Dieter stammers before pouring himself a cup of the brewed coffee. 

You watch him looking anxiously around as he dumps the sugar into his brew before taking a seat opposite you. 

"So I was thinking about the Mia thing," You offer after a sip of tea. “She loves to travel right? Like, outside of work?”

“Yeah,” Dieter nods enthusiastically. "Last week she actually suggested we go on a trip together after the film wraps."

“So do it,” you insist. “Show her with action that you want and cherish her. Just the two of you somewhere romantic. Where does she like? Paris? Italy?”

“She was always talking about Prague,” Dieter offers as he recalls their times together. When they were first getting to know one another under the pretense of running lines. “She’s always wanted to go.”

“So take Mia to Prague,” you say enthusiastically as you can manage. “See the sights, stay at wonderfully fancy places, do romantic things. Prove to her that you want to be with her. Because she obviously means something to you Dieter.”

“You seem awfully concerned about my romantic life,” Dieter muses. “When did that start?”

“Contrary to what you believe, I care about you,” you say shortly. “And when I’m gone I want to make sure that things are stable. Mia is a good stabilizing force. And from what I can tell she’s a lot tougher than I gave her credit for.”

“So Prague,” Dieter echoes, thinking about your suggestion. It’s a good plan. A smart one if Mia will give him a chance to prove how much he cares about her.

“I won’t lie I’m jealous,” you smirk at your cereal bowl. "Always wanted to go there."

I'll take you. I'll take you anywhere you want to go.

Dieter shakes his head to erase this dangerous thought. 

No. No you won't, Bravo. She's leaving practically as soon as your kid is here. Stop thinking about her like that. She's your employee. 

"Well you'll have three hundred thousand dollars to play around with," Dieter says forcing a smile to his own face. 

"Two hundred," you correct through a mouthful of cereal. 

"Huh?"

"Well uh, I have to pay off my mom's mortgage. There's still about a two hundred thousand left on it. Then I have to pay off my student loans the next semesters' tuition and rent a place so... No trips to Prague for me." 

You give a little huffing laugh before going back to your cereal. Dieter takes a long sip of his coffee thinking about everything that’s gone on.

You begin to tap into your tablet, bringing up your flight details. Dieter watches you typing, transfixed by the way your fingers move, the way the ring he bought you sometimes spins on your finger. He recalls the way those same fingertips felt gripping him as he licked-

Fucking stop.

"Okay, that's done; the car will be here around three. Bags are packed, your passport is with mine," you say checking things off your list with a satisfied smile before it drops. “And our meeting with Diane is in ten.”

“Diane?”

Diane is the big guns when it comes to PR and Dieter’s career in general. Knowing that you’ve pissed her off stresses the both of you big time. And as if you’ve summoned a well organized demon the laptop chirps.

Seconds later you and Dieter sit awkwardly next to one another at the kitchen table, your laptop positioned between the two of you. A furious looking Diane is on the zoom call, her dark red brows knitted together. 

"I thought I was perfectly clear."

"You were Diane," you jump in, your cheeks red. "It's-"

"No public affection," Diane interjects. "No fraternizing with co-stars."

Dieter gives a sheepish grin at that before his eyes jot to you. You can't even look at him in the small box of the zoom meeting. You feel so foolish about all of this. All your years of professionalism, striving to have things under control and this is how it ends? A blurry snapshot of you kissing your celebrity boss?

"The baby kicked for the first time," Dieter offers quietly. "We were just really excited."

"Congrats," Diane says without a shred of conviction. "Now we have a PR nightmare that we have to spin."

“I know we screwed up, Diane, but I swear it was a heat of the moment,” you implore her. “It won’t happen again.”

“You’re damn right it won’t. As of this moment you are no longer working for Dieter Bravo.”

“Hey-“ Dieter starts but Diane is talking over him.

“You wanted to keep her on Dee, and look what happened. And now we can’t even keep you on the books because it’ll look suspicious,” Diane snaps. “You can’t be seen fucking and paying your assistant, it’ll be career suicide. I’ll have to pay her wage through a third party and I really didn’t need this headache considering I was already finished up on a plan for unveiling baby Bravo and now I have to rethink the entire thing.”

 Dieter looks over to see your head hung low, your cheeks stained red. He knows how much this is killing you. How much you prided yourself on your work acumen and professionalism. He tries to slide his hand over yours but you pull away sharply, eyes going to Diane.

“I understand, Diane. Just tell me what I need to do.”

The flight back is a strained one. Diane has booked you both first class and private pods but across the plane from one another. You don’t interact the entire flight; instead you’re left to your own thoughts as you absently stroke your stomach.

You have a few things in your favor – it was getting close to having to stop working anyway. You’re officially showing and you’re still getting paid. That money can all go to the family.

The family.

Your mother’s voice over the phone rings in your ears. The shrill terrified shout that this couldn’t be true. You’ve disappointed her. You have to explain it all to her as soon as possible. It’ll be easier to just tear the band aid off.

Dieter rests in his own private pod three whiskey’s deep, his swollen eyes hidden behind sunglasses. He’s been holding back tears all morning and now they slip down his gold cheeks in the privacy of the flight.

He doesn’t get to see you or the baby until he’s born. It’s a fucking cruelty.

“If you want her to have a normal life, Dee, you’ll stay far away from her. She needs to be seen as a surrogate only, not a romance. We can write the kiss off as a one-time thing if we find an alternative romantic partner to highlight for you.”

Of course he’d agreed immediately. He doesn’t want you or the baby stressed. It’s his own fault for wanting you so badly it aches. You promised to update the app daily, to video chat at least every other day. That had seemed fair.

But now on the way back to LA, Dieter can’t help but feel this growing pit starting in his belly. A coldness that has nothing to do with the weather. He’s not going to see you every day, won’t be able to smell your perfume, hear your voice when you sing in the shower (off-key), won’t snuggle you to him as you watch nature documentary’s. 

At least before this photo Dieter had the option of going to your house to see you in the last few months of your pregnancy, but now with the media frenzy there’s no possibility. It’ll be horrible for you and your mom.

Once he’s off the flight Dieter’s phone is buzzing. He takes it out, surprised to see that Diane has already sent him a few texts. He’s confused before he remembers that without you as his PA he’ll be receiving her messages directly.

[12:33pm] I talked to Mia’s publicist. She’s agreed to a public romance rollout this Friday. New club opening.  Confirming your availability.

Dieter glances over at you in the luggage carousel, eyes flitting from bag to bag as you wait for yours.  You look like a goddess despite your dark black clothes and oversized sunglasses. He knows you’re trying to be inconspicuous.

[12:34pm] D: I’m available.

You’ve got your luggage and Dieter scrambles to grab his own before rolling it over to you. You notice his approach and try to affect a casual attitude. Thankfully no one seems to recognize you from the photos.

“I’ll make sure you get into your taxi,” Dieter offers quietly walking alongside you, his brows raised.

“No it’s fine,” you insist, taking your rolling luggage and giving him a soft smile. “I’ll be good. I’ll head out first; hopefully if there are any paps they won’t recognize me before I’m in the cab.”

“Right.”

When you walk out of the airport you think of all the things Diane warned you about over the phone. The photographers, the yelling, the attention. You thought you were ready for it.

You were wrong.

But there are at least fifty paparazzi all hanging around like flashbulb vultures waiting to catch you both looking vulnerable. Groups of men with oversized cameras are all shouting at you, calling your name, saying things to get your attention.

"Over here! Hey, over here!"

"Have you two picked out names yet?"

“Did you put holes in the condom?”

"Do you know the gender?"

“Do you sleep with all your employers?”

"Is it twins? It looks like it could be twins."

You feel anxious tears starting at the corner of your eyes. They’re going to photograph you and you’re going to be crying. You still in the crowd, hand on your luggage strap, frozen like a deer in the headlights.

The taxi seems so far away, the lights, the sounds; the sensation of being suffocated is all you can focus on. You feel like you’re drowning. Your chin wobbles and another camera is thrust directly into your face.

One hand curls over your belly protectively before you raise the other to shield your face. You feel completely alone and vulnerable, the tears almost spilling when you feel a warm hand envelop your wrist. You glance up to see Dieter there at your side, stony faced at the paparazzi as he pulls you gently towards him.

“Give her room to breathe.”

Gratitude floods you and despite Diane’s directions to avoid each other like the plague you let him lead you towards where his private SUV waits.

His arm goes to your back, urging you to move with him. As you and Dieter shuffle through the throng of shouting people you suddenly understand why Dieter drowns himself in drugs and sex and everything else. This constant whirlwind, this unbearable attack on all sides is exhausting. Photographers, fans, cameras, eyes, shouts. It's terrifying.

"Is this the result of a one night stand?"

“Dieter have you asked for a DNA test?”

 “How old are you?”

“DIETER I LOVE YOU!”

“Did you feel pressured because Mr Bravo is your boss?”

“Can I have your autograph!?”

“What a slut!”

“What’s the sex like?”

A camera is thrust inches from your face and you give a yelp, putting up a free hand in front of you as the light flashes.

"Hey, get the fuck away from her," Dieter says placing a protective arm around your waist and sweeping you along with him. He doesn’t let you go as he herds you through the line of shouting people. Dieter’s driver is there, grabbing your bag for you and loading it into the SUV.

“Just breathe, baby,” Dieter murmurs against your temple. “I got you.”

You want to tell him that this will look bad in tomorrow’s gossip column; that even just walking side by side will create a frenzy of tabloid speculation. But you’re terrified at the mob of people and your hand clutches at the front of Dieter’s jacket as you shy away from them.  

"Are you really pregnant or is this a publicity stunt?"

"Dieter what about rumors that you've been linked recently with Mia Rowe?"

"It's it true this child might be Robert Pattinson’s?"

When the last photographer starts shouting and shoving the camera in your face again you let out a small whimper as Dieter opens the door of the SUV for you.

“Please just stop!”

Dieter hears your cry and turns to see your terrified expression before you’re burying your face in Dieter’s shoulder.

Dieter loses all rational thought. All he can focus on is the way you’re trembling in his arms, the way your hand has gone protectively over your stomach protecting his son, the child you made together.   

Before you can stop him he's reared back and kicked the photographer in the vee of his legs and the man blanches. You look on in horror at the altercation.

"Dieter!"

Flashbulbs are going off like crazy as the man groans sharply, grabbing between his legs and collapsing onto the sidewalk.

“I said stay the fuck away from her!” Dieter shouts, his cheeks red.

He pulls himself in after you, closing the door before his arms are around you, pulling you against him. The windows are tinted, but that won’t matter after that little performance out there.

“Ready to go Mister Bravo?”

“Yeah, thanks Hank.”

The car is already in motion, heading for Dieter’s place as the sound of shouts grow quieter and quieter with each passing mile. You’re still shaking, still reeling from everything that happened.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers. “That must have been terrifying. I’m used to it now but I remember how it used to be.”

“How do you do it?” you ask, still trembling. “They’re relentless.”

“Coke. Sex. Booze,” Dieter shrugs as if this is a natural response. “I get by. But it doesn’t mean you should have to.”

Dieter has his hand holding yours, thumb rubbing soothing circles along the back of your palm. 

“And here I thought my Mom was going to be the most stressful part of today,” you say trying to offer a weak smile.

“Is it really going to be that bad do you think?”

“Honestly yeah, I do,” you say nodding.  “She’s going to be pissed and I’m going to have to walk on eggshells until the baby is born.”

"Why don't you stay in my guest house?"

You gaze up and over at Dieter, seeing that he’s watching your face with a soft expression as the car coasts through the busy LA traffic.

"What?”

"You don't want to stay at home, I have the empty space. I don't see why that's so weird. And if I’m honest I don’t wanna be so far away from my son,” Dieter finishes lamely. “I like seeing him growing every day.”

I like seeing you every day.

He can’t admit that to you. He never will. He’ll swallow it down deep.

“I have to go home, Dieter.” You insist. “Plus, Diane would murder me. This flies in the face of everything she’s trying to cultivate for your image.”

Dieter doesn’t say anything, but he does relax back into the seat next to you.  He doesn’t release your hand, instead he maneuvers his fingers, lacing them through yours and resting them on the seat between you both.

You tell Hank your address and you take a deep breath as a short while later he rounds on your street.

Your Mom wasn’t joking.

There really are tons of people littering your normally quiet suburban neighborhood. Many with expensive looking cameras and phones. You groan as the SUV crawls by them before you insist on having the Hank drive you around the corner. The last thing you need is to be seen getting out of Dieter’s car.

Hank goes to take your bags out of the trunk and Dieter readies himself to follow you out the door.

“I’ll come-“

“No,” you insist gently. “I have to do this myself.”

He wants to deny this but he sees the seriousness of your countenance and nods. He knows you’re a strong, capable woman. But the thought of you being messed with by those paps are making his jaw clench.

“Don’t worry,” you tell him with a grin as you slip on a pair of oversized sunglasses. “Thanks to you I know how to get them to leave me alone.”

He can’t help but let out a short laugh, cut short when you close the car door. Dieter watches you take the suitcase handle from Hank and thank him before you roll it down the sidewalk and out of his life for the foreseeable future.

The first thing you notice when you get inside your house is how quiet it is.

Especially compared to the madness that is just outside your front door.  You’d successfully ignored the men and women who shouted questions at you. You were busy on the phone with the local police ensuring that your Mother’s home would no longer be swarmed. You slide your suitcase to the left of the door.

“Mom?”

She appears moments later dressed in her sweatpants and oversized sweater.  She hasn’t left the house despite it being a workday.

“Your flight was okay?”

“Uh, yep.”

“Good.”

“You didn’t go to work today?”

“Couldn’t get my car out of the driveway,” your Mom says tightly.

“I called the city when I was walking up,” you tell her, toeing off your shoes. “They’ll take care of it.”

She nods but makes no move to smile or to hug you. She’s always been an emotional woman, prone to hugs and kisses so her complete lack of anything has you on edge.

“I made pie,” she says, “come have a slice.”

You hear distant sirens outside as you follow her into the kitchen, taking your coat off before plopping into seat opposite her at the table. You don’t miss how her eyes widen at the obvious swell of your stomach.  

“So it’s true.”

You watch her cut the peach pie she’s baked noting that her fingers are trembling. You say nothing in reply, simply watching as she slides your portion and a fork to you on the plate before she looks back at your face.

“You made a child with that horrible man.”

“He’s not a horrible man,” you say, your voice coming out more caustic than expected. “You don’t know anything about him other than what the media wants you to think.”

“Oh, he’s an angel then, is that it?” your Mother gives a humorless laugh as she sits in her seat, the cheap wood creaking. “He doesn’t do drugs? Doesn’t say crazy things? Doesn’t act like a fool?”

Your mother has always ragged on Dieter through your entire employment. Most of the time you could shrug it off, ignore it or even laugh along with her. But now? After everything you’ve experienced with him you feel a strangely intense feeling of protectiveness. For the soft man that holds you in bed and buys you rings just because. For the man that listens to you talk about your Dad and shares about his mom. Hearing her deride him makes you curl your fingers around your fork in anger.

“Even if he did all those things, so what? If the worst thing you can say about Dieter Bravo is that he acts immature and says silly things and does drugs every once in a while does that really make him so horrible?”

“It makes him irresponsible,” your Mom snaps. The worst possible thing you can be in your mother’s eyes in irresponsible. “And he’s supposed to be the father of your child? Of my grandson? I’m not going to have a son in law that acts like he does.”

A son in law?

You could laugh at the thought of Dieter being a married family man. When would he have time to go on hippie retreats and have threesomes? Although considering his behavior of late perhaps that’s an unfair belief. Regardless, Dieter Bravo is not the marrying kind.

"Mom we're not getting married. Ever."

Your mom's fork clatters onto her plate, the pie forgotten.

"What? Why not?"

Fuck. This is going to hurt so much more than you thought. Hearing your Mom refer to herself as a grandmother is a new kind of pain you weren’t anticipating. You can see it there in her eyes that keep lingering on your belly – all the hopes and dreams of grandchildren running through her mind.

“We’re not in a relationship.… this isn't... I'm not keeping the baby," you finally manage to say in a thick voice.  

"What?” Your mom nearly shouts when she looks to your swollen stomach, her features contorted in horror.  "You can't just get an-"

"No, not like that. I mean, I'm giving the baby to Dieter. He's paying me to be his surrogate." 

Saying it out loud makes your heart hammer. If you thought she looked horrified at the previous comment, she looks downright disgusted now. She leans back in her chair, as if she physically cannot stand to be closer to you.

"What?"

"I'm getting paid," you explain in a rush, hoping that this will ease the pain of it. "Three hundred thousand dollars." 

You expect that this will soften the blow of the news but if anything she looks as if she’s been slapped.

“You’re… selling your baby?”

The way she says it makes your skin crawl, like you’re some backroom monster.

“It’s not like that,” you say raking your hands through your hair in frustration. “Mom, I’m not like, his Mom. I’m just carrying him. Like, remember when Liz had the surrogate? I’m like that girl they hired.”

“Liz didn’t let her husband sleep with that woman did she? They did it at the hospital, with a transfer,” Your mom peers into your face and you think you see a shadow of hope. “Is that what happened, honey? You got an embryo transfer?”

Fuck this is getting worse by the minute.

“No. We slept together. It was a mistake.”

You wince when you feel your son kick, a light flutter that has you gripping the sides of your abdomen in surprise.  Guilt immediately goes through you – can he understand what you’re saying during all of this? No, of course not, he’s a fucking fetus. And yet that doesn’t stop you from welling up.

"This is so…twisted,” your mom replies with a shake of her head. “It’s one thing to sleep with him and have his baby. But you… You’re not even going to be his mother? You’re selling him off like he’s a piece of furniture?”

A solemn quiet goes around the space and your mother drops her napkin to the table.  You take a bite of your pie, finding it bitter.

“That’s not at all what’s happening.”

"If your father was here-"

"Well he's not!" you snap out at her. “You had no one else to take care of you so I stepped up. I see how long the hours are that you work, how exhausted you are. You’re supposed to retiring at this age, not taking on double shifts. I wanted to pay off the mortgage for you. I wanted to pay for my schooling. And Dieter wanted a child, so how is this pregnancy a bad thing? We all got something out of it.”

“Got something out of it?” Your mother almost sneers. “You don’t get something out of it. You created life and now you’re selling him for profit to a man who needs help staying sober longer than a week. It’s disgusting what the two of you are doing.”

A searing pain goes through you as you sit there, the pie dry and tacky in your mouth. It hurts to swallow it down. But it hurts more to know that your sacrifice is now being thrown back into your face.

“I did this for you,” you tell her weakly.

"I never asked you to do anything for me," your mom says and now you see the shame in her eyes. The disappointment. “It’s disgraceful treating human life like a commodity. I… I can’t accept that money from you. It’s tainted.”

I did it all for nothing.

You feel numb. Your Mom has lowered her chin to her sternum and you can see fat tears slipping down her nose. She’s silent as she cries and when she does this it reminds you so much of your father’s funeral and the way she’d silently sobbed that you feel physically ill.

You can’t be in this environment. Not just because it hurts so much to have her talk to you like she has. But because you can’t spend the next several months on eggshells, high strung and anxious. You can’t do that to the life that is building itself within your womb, cell by cell. You will give your son every advantage you can.

"I can't be in this house," you say softly. "I'm sorry, mom. I... I can't."

“I think that might be for the best,” she agrees, and you notice that she can’t meet your eyes.

You move to your feet wobbling to your bedroom, closing the door gently behind you. You look at the awards on the desks, the beautiful painting you look at each morning, at the space you lived in with your Mom and Dad. You can almost hear his voice as he told he was so proud of his smart daughter and her science awards.

If you try you can remember how it felt to have him read you bedtime stories before you fell asleep in this very room. You can still smell the cinnamon bread your Mom would make you every year for your first day of school.

But then you blink and all you see is a room with a bed and a desk and some art on the walls. A past life of someone who doesn’t exist anymore.  You catch your reflection in your dresser mirror, amused to see that the woman staring back at you hasn’t been a child for a long time. She stands with a splotchy face and tired eyes, and a stomach that swells with life.

“You’re gonna be safe,” you tell the bump in the mirror.  “I promise.”

You glance out between your drawn blinds thankful to see that the group has been dispersed by local law enforcement. Good. You bring out your mobile and begin tapping out a message.

[4:31pm]:  Is that offer of staying at your place still on?

D [4:31pm]: i'll send a car

You don’t even fight him on it.

[4:32pm]: Thank you.

D [4:32pm]: u never have to thank me

You make your way to your closet where you bring out a second suitcase, filling it to the brim with everything you think you’ll need for the next little bit. Your suitcase full of clothes from your last trip is waiting for you at the front door for when you exit.

You sit on the end of your bed, waiting for the car when you feel your phone buzz at your hip.

It’s a photo from Dieter, one that makes your brows saddle. It’s of his guest house, the one he usually just keeps for out of town guests and overflow storage for his paintings and other purchases.

But you can see he’s organized it, swept the floors and set everything up nicely complete with a vase of fresh flowers from his garden sitting on the coffee table.

D [4:56pm]: ready and waiting, baby mama

Your hand is on your abdomen without thought, gently holding your son through the tendons and tissues. You give a watery smile at your screen before looking down at your belly, feeling a sense of relief bloom behind your sternum.

“Everything’s gonna be okay, little one. Your Dad is gonna take care of us.”

TAGLIST: @getitoutofmymindwrites @manuymesut @whirlwindrider29 @mostardentlypascal @lu62 @missladym1981 @heareball @sptbear @drewharrisonwriter @lizzie-cakes

#dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo #dieter x reader #dieter bravo fic #dieter bravo x reader #dad!Dieter #pedro pascal #fanfiction #fanfic #smut #dieter bravo smut #dieter bravo fanfic #dieter bravo x you #the bubble fanfiction #the bubble

[resedacitrus]

daniel larusso is not the real villain of the karate kid movies and here's why: a mega post because quite frankly, i am tired

fair warning, this is long and brings up some pretty self-explanatory points. nonetheless, i need to say these things because i have been in daniel's position multiple times and it drives me nuts when people say he somehow deserved what the cobras did to him! i'm well aware how dramatic i'm probably being but i honestly don't care. so happy reading!!!

before i start rambling, i just want to say something: i know the original "daniel is the real bully" video is a joke, and this is not about that nor is it about the people who jokingly use that phrase. this is for the obnoxious people who legitimately believe daniel is at fault for what he went through. also, i know johnny and the cobras were being terribly misled by kreese at this time! that doesn't justify their actions, rather it explains them.

1. the beach fight was JOHNNY'S fault, not daniel's!

daniel had been in california for a day. A DAY. when he met ali at the beach party, he knew absolutely NOTHING about her other than the fact that she was pretty and he wanted to pursue her. he didn't even know her name for crying out loud, how was he supposed to know her dating history?

johnny was the one who was territorial and jealous. johnny was the one who flew into a rage when he saw ali being happy with someone else. that's not to invalidate the heartbreak he felt and was still processing after ali dumped him, because those emotions were 100% real! (and not to mention, kreese was misleading him SEVERELY at this time) but johnny was the one who consciously chose to stir up trouble with ali and disrespect the clear boundary she had set.

daniel was nothing more than a bystander. he saw this nice sweet girl he liked being messed with and his first instinct was to help her. that's pretty gentlemanly if you ask me, and i'd hope a guy would help me out if i was being hassled by my angry ex. he didn't want trouble, he just wanted to diffuse the situation. he approached things calmly and nicely and JOHNNY was the one who decided to get physical. if daniel hadn't helped ali, and he'd just stood there, people would say he "had no balls" and he let ali get pushed around. but when he helps her, he "shouldn't have gotten involved". daniel didn't know who johnny was, or what johnny was capable of. all he saw was a bad situation and he wanted to help.

oh and one more thing, after daniel sucker-punches johnny, you can see him holding his fist but he also has a hand out for a shake whilst saying "ok man, now we're even!" daniel didn't want a rivalry. johnny did. daniel was simply defending ali and then himself. you're telling me you wouldn't fight back if some random guy was beating up on you? ok...sure...

2. the soccer tryouts incident with bobby...again, NOT daniel's fault!

how people manage to blame daniel for this one is laughable and embarrassing to me honestly. daniel was simply minding his own business, playing soccer and waiting to try out for the team. he probably saw soccer as an opportunity for him to find his place. as someone who has struggled to fit in and make friends for years, i totally get where he was at in this scene.

ali comes up and initiates a conversation with him and he smiles, despite having just gotten the crap beat out of him the previous night for interacting with her. he didn't want trouble, he just wanted to find connections with people.

it's JOHNNY AND THE COBRAS who ganged up on daniel. they were the ones who plotted against him. they were the ones who sent little hand signals to each other. daniel was in his own little world, kicking the ball around and not bothering anyone. BOBBY was the one who came after him, as we hear daniel loudly shout to the soccer coach.

"but daniel shouldn't have tackled and punched bobby!" nope. don't wanna hear it. if bobby didn't wanna get tackled and socked in the face, maybe he should have left well enough alone. if bobby didn't want daniel getting angry and fighting back, he should have left daniel alone. he picked the wrong hothead to mess with. again, daniel had every right to defend himself. if he hadn't, everyone would call him a pansy and make fun of him even more. the kid can't win!

this is why bullying victims don't speak up 🙈

3. the bike accident

do i even need to go into detail for this one? the cobras were 100% to blame here yet again. daniel was minding his own beeswax and they decided it would be appropriate to push him down a hill on his bike??? come on you snakes, give it a rest! daniel could have been severely injured here if not dead and i don't think anyone really acknowledges how scary that truly is.

let's put it in context: johnny and his gang were doing this to daniel over a girl. a girl! is a high school girlfriend really worth someone's safety and life? i don't think so!

4. the halloween fight. oh Lord.

this one is perhaps the most controversial since daniel did have a bit of a fault here. let me explain.

up to this point, and after the bike incident, the cobras had been leaving daniel alone. granted, daniel had been fleeing the scene any time he saw them and he avoided ali like the plague because he didn't want himself beaten up, but they really didn't bother him too much.

so i get it when people say daniel shouldn't have pulled the water prank. i really do.

but, think about it. wet clothes and hair and a ruined joint (all very fixable things!) are nothing compared to the amount of bruises, bleeding and torment the cobras had given daniel up to this point. the memories of this torture aren't exactly the easiest to get rid of, and you can't just dry them off with a towel. water is harmless. being beaten and bullied over a girl isn't.

daniel should have considered the outcomes before he did it, and i think one of his flaws is definitely his impulsiveness, but he had a right to give johnny a taste of his own medicine. even then, what he did to johnny isn't even an iota of what johnny did to him! so was medicine even served?

johnny flew into a murderous rage all over a harmless prank. johnny could have killed daniel that night and the producers confirmed that. if it weren't for mr. miyagi, daniel would have been dead or severely hurt and the cobras would have been facing charges. serious ones, at that. all over jealousy and over-protectiveness for a girl who didn't belong to them.

sure, daniel should have stayed away from johnny. he knew what johnny and the guys were capable of, and he wasn't stupid. he knew the potential risks. but johnny had no business overreacting the way he did. it was water, johnny. the kid didn't murder your family (or anything else that would warrant that type of reaction).

that's all i have to say, i think. in conclusion, yes daniel was a little punk. yes he was impulsive and it got him into trouble. however, johnny was the clear perpetrator here and none of what he did to daniel should ever be justified. 😁

#the karate kid #the karate kid (1984) #cobra kai #karate kid meta #cobra kai meta #daniel larusso #ralph macchio #johnny lawrence #billy zabka

[cage-cat-yt]

Art dump I forgot to post yesturday

First one is of Sans and Stinkie playing Mario Kart 8 (random, I know, but this is my favorite of the dump), Sans playing as Waluigi and Stinkie playing as female inkling (3rd variation if I remember correctly ^^). I like to think Sans is winning, but it can all be left up to interpretation, this was just some dumb drawing I felt like doing.

Second one is an outfit swap with Mirror Man and Rocky. I was so weirded out to do this, and I remember regretting drawing it, but atlas, I'm gonna post it since I feel MM is stylish in that fedora lol

And then the final one was gonna be a quick comic panel of Jasper's death scene, but I got sidetracked on only got to doing Quinn, which is fine ^^ though in the canon JaS she's mega pale, and ibdidnt have the right color so she looks more toned than usual.

Anyway, thanks for reading! Remember to hydrate and I hope you have a good day :)

#undertale #jack stauber's opal #goosebumps slappy #casper the friendly ghost #casper 1995 #original series #original character #josef and sauer #oc #sans the skeleton #sans undertale #sans #stinkie mcfadden #ctfg stinkie #jack stauber's opal mirror man #opal mirror man #mirror man opal #jack stauber mirror man #mirror man #rocky the dummy #rocky goosebumps #quinn lolan #quinn jas #multifandom #crossover #cage-cat