#cw: hospital

[jammyness]

Kinda feeling like I want to just purge all my sad comics at once haha. Things are better now but they were bad for a long time. This was originally posted on my Patreon in 2018.

Just to reassure y'all that I'm ok. Even if my circumstances have been a bit of a rollercoaster even since this time, I have been strong enough to defend my health through it all. I'm proud that I have honoured this commitment to myself. I am not my work. No project is worth your health.

#comic #sad (sorry) #cw: mental health #cw: hospital #was 2017 worse than 2020 for me? #I almost want to say yes but it's a really tough call

[thevioletcaptain]

So I've been quiet on here a lot longer than planned.

The reasons are many. The reasons are varied.

The reasons are mostly fucking horrible.

Under a cut because it's long. Check tags for content warnings.

First was the expected absence: my parents came to visit me in Los Angeles over my birthday, so I spent the first half of October showing them around whenever I wasn't working a shift at my shitty department store day-job, or in class at UCLA.

Then, almost immediately after they went back to Australia, I got a second job working as a personal assistant for a composer. This was (and is) an extremely fun and rewarding job, but meant having one more thing on my weekly schedule, which was an adjustment.

Given that until halfway through last year, I'd been out of work since I immigrated in 2019, it took a while for me to get used to having so many concurrent responsibilities, and I'd just started to get a handle on things when I got sick right before the holidays. I took many covid tests -- all negative -- and eventually determined that it was just last year's strain of flu, which I hadn't managed to find time to get the shot for due to the aforementioned super busy schedule. I'm almost positive it was thanks to a particular customer at the aforementioned shitty department store job who coughed hard enough in my direction for their germs to get through my n95.

Anyway, last year's flu was a monster, and I spent a week in bed with a fever, then several more weeks being utterly drained and with a horrendous cough to match. It took a full month for me to recover, and then in mid-January, almost as soon as I started to catch up on all the things that had fallen behind while I was sick, things got bad, then good, then worse, then better, then much, much, much worse.

Basically, it starts with my dad being diagnosed with prostate cancer. He'd told me in October when they came to see me, but the surgery was scheduled for the tail end of January.

The surgery happened on a Monday, and it was a complete success. They got it all in one go. No chemo or radiation or further treatment needed at all. I spoke to him on the phone after he woke up, and he was in good spirits. Happy to have been given the all clear by his doctors.

I told him to watch Star Trek: Strange New Worlds & Evil while he rested up at home, because I'm writing specs for both this year and wanted him to be able to read them and know what was going on. He's the one who got me into sci-fi and horror, after all.

He went home.

He was home for two days.

He started feeling a bit rough on the Thursday. Short of breath. No appetite. Mum took him back to the hospital, just to be safe.

Turns out he'd had a mild heart attack. They couldn't figure out why. The echocardiogram didn't show any issues with his heart.

Then over the next couple of days, his breathing got worse. They took a scan of his lungs, and found that they were extremely inflamed. They'd given him covid tests but they came back negative. We told them about a work accident he had about 20 years ago, where a switchboard he'd been working on exploded in his face, and he'd suffered from inhalation burns among other things.

They thought that maybe something during the prostate surgery had caused irritation in his already damaged lungs, which put stress on his heart and caused the mild heart attack. He's never had any issues with his lungs since that accident, but they thought that maybe he'd just adapted to the damage over the years without realizing.

They kept trying different treatments to help his lungs heal. Nothing seemed to work. His breathing kept getting worse. They had him on as much oxygen as possible without intubating him, but it wasn't enough, so over that weekend they decided that they'd need to move him to another hospital with a more specialized lung unit.

When they were preparing to do that on the Monday night, he crashed. Another heart attack. Bigger, this time. They intubated him. Sedated him. Called my mum and told her to come in right away because things looked so bad.

But then he rallied. By the morning, though he was still sedated and intubated, the doctors were confident that with the right treatment at the specialized lung unit at the other hospital, he'd be okay. He was still in a rough condition, but stable. They transferred him to the other hospital.

He was given another covid test. This one came back positive.

My mum and brother called me once it was a reasonable time in Los Angeles to let me know what was going on, and the next day my brother booked me a flight back to Australia. I had to leave for the airport about five hours after my ticket was booked.

I got to Melbourne on February 1st.

For the next two weeks, dad was intubated, sedated, and in an isolation room. Every few days, they scanned his lungs again, and they were slowly improving.

Finally, he stopped testing positive, and was moved to a regular room in the ICU. Then he healed enough for them to extubate him and wake him up.

On February 13th, he was conscious enough to squeeze my hand when we went in to see him. On February 14th, he was conscious and capable of talking enough to ask a nurse in his ward to bring him his phone, and called mum first thing in the morning to wish her a happy Valentines Day.

Two days later, on Friday 16th, his lungs looked good enough on scans that they felt it was safe to do an angiogram, which they wanted to do just to double check that there weren't any issues with his heart that they missed with the echo.

They did the test. They found massive blockages. 90% blockage in one artery; significant blockages in two others.

Even though he'd barely recovered from covid, the blockages were bad enough that they scheduled him for open heart surgery on Monday 19th. They said without surgery there was a 100% chance that the blockages would cause another massive heart attack that he would not survive. They said there was about a 20% chance that he'd have complications, but only about 4% that they'd be serious/life threatening.

Like before, the surgery went well. Triple bypass, in the end. We got a call late on Monday afternoon to say that he was in recovery and looking good. His heart was functioning perfectly. They'd bring him out of sedation that night. Keep him in the ICU one or two days just as the standard post-op procedure. He'd spend a week or so in a cardiac ward after that, then head to a physical rehab ward for a couple of weeks until he could build back the muscle mass he'd lost while sedated.

We went in to see him the next day. Tuesday 20th. His 66th birthday.

He was tired, but looked good. Color in his cheeks. He made a couple of jokes. We left after about 45 minutes because he was pretty worn out, and we wanted to let him get some rest.

But then after, that his breathing started to get bad again. By Wednesday morning, they'd switched out the oxygen prongs in his nose for a big, high-pressure mask again. They called to let us know they were going to intubate him again so he could rest while his lungs recovered a bit more.

They struggled to get the tube in.

His lungs were deteriorating badly. He kept getting worse. We couldn't go in to see him because they were working on him all day.

At 9pm we got a call to say that he was just getting worse. They had him on 100% oxygen. He just wasn't absorbing it. His entire body was under massive strain. They were doing everything they could, but he just wasn't improving.

They said we should go in right away.

We got there by 10pm. My brother and his wife arrived about the same time. We went in to see him. He didn't look good. He looked pale. But he was warm, and he'd come back from the brink before, and we were sure he could do it again. We stayed with him for about an hour, and left not long after 11pm. Went back to my brother's place because they live closer to the hospital.

We were there about half an hour before they called us again. Just after midnight. He was gone.

That was about a week and a half ago, now. It still doesn't feel real. He was only 66. He hadn't even retired yet. He was working full time up until the week before Christmas, and had planned on going back to work a few days a week after he'd recovered from surgery. He never had any heart trouble, or lung trouble. He was active. He was fine.

My wife Zel and her mom flew in a couple of days after it happened. I barely remember anything from the past two weeks. Everything just feels fake.

I've been trying to write something to say at the funeral, which we've finally been able to arrange for next week -- it was delayed because we had to wait for dad to be released by the coroner. I don't think I'll be able to do it.

Anyway. That's where I've been.

It'll probably be a little while longer before I'm around here much, let alone posting with any regularity, because I'll be in Australia helping my mum & and my brother sort everything out. I have no idea how long I'll be dealing with stuff, or when I'll be able to make words cooperate enough to post anything, but I'll be back eventually.

I'm trying to keep an eye on Discord (I'm violetmatter over there) so you can find me there if you want. But yeah, I just wanted to let you guys know why I've been so quiet.

#cass says things #this is a very long #and heavy post #so i guess i should include some content warnings #uh #christ what do i even tag this with #cw: hospital #cw: health #cw: death #cw: parent death

[littlescaryinternetguy]

Borrowers who live in hospitals, who don't know silence but only the distant flow of negative pressure, the beeps. They know the songs of human pain and relief. They have a concordance. Morphine, saline, serine protease. Down in the basement they make a home in the steam plant. Up in the attic they make a home in the cooling system. The two groups give each other grief, but they love each other very much. They've seen what happens when people are unloved. The open spaces in a hospital are open, so open. There's never anywhere to hide. The lights are never completely off. There's no night and day. But still they make do. The kitchens are vast and you can always get in the walk-in coolers if you know what you're doing. In the cities, the other borrowers tend to avoid them, their pallor, their clipped direct speech, how soundlessly they appear and disappear. It's not that they're creepy, necessarily, just... In the palliative wards, they watch television from the vents. They feel a duty to watch television from the vents. Every four hours, they rotate out. They know the names of all the newscasters. They know all the news. They don't understand it, but they know all the news. They know that they mustn't let the patient be alone. If nobody comes to be with the patient there, one will visit them. They know that they mustn't let the patient be alone. The palliative nurses know this too. The palliative nurses think of their tiny co-workers as angels of a sort. They never tell anyone. Dilaudid, oxycodone, gadolinium. Walk through the halls late at night. There, a patient is murmuring, but nobody else is there. It would be sad but you glance through the door. They are smiling, and you hurry on, back from the bathroom or the vending machine or the balcony, back to where you sleep and listen to your brother murmur. You watch him for a few minutes and fall back asleep.

#sfw g/t #cw: hospital #cw: death #writing this in a hospital as we speak #see if you can figure out exactly when the morphine hit

[cipher-zoo]

Cough cough Buggy slowly detaches himself from the Roger pirates cause he thinks that he's just a burden cough cough.

-forgotten birthday anon

Forgotten Birthday anon! I need you to come off anon and face me! I just want to talk!

Okay, but seriously, I haven‘t answered my sad Buggy headcanon asks in a while, because I actually love the Roger Pirates and constantly writing bad things about them was saddening. But it has been a while, so I can clearly come back to them now.

And you send me this! On the day I finally got to watch OPLA! Unacceptable (in all seriousness tho, I love this, but I get to that later)

I almost made a joke about how this message was probably what sent me to the hospital, but I would feel too bad about making a joke like that, so instead I assure you, that despite your apparent cruelty, my hospitalisation has nothing to do with this message (It sure would be weird if it did 😂)

Okay, but all this aside, let‘s get to the ask! 💙

It would definitely be an interesting idea and it certainly explains why Buggy never feels the need to catch up with anyone from his old crew.

After all, the only people we hear him mention in canon are Shanks, Roger and Rayleigh (the people he had actual strong connections to). So eve there it would make sense. Of course, there is also the added fact that he and Shanks got abandoned by the rest of the crew - which, I am still mad about! Like seriously, there was no need to dump the two of them on a random island! Someone should have definitely taken them with him, even if all he members of the crew went their separate ways.

But also, in this headcanon world, Buggy’s feeling, that he is nothing but a burden, only intensives after he accidentally eats the devil fruit, thus essentially robbing the crew of quite a lot of Berrys.

Especially (and I think I mentioned this before, but honestly I can‘t find it), since I can totally see Shanks making jokes about how they have to sell Buggy now, that they can‘t sell the fruit anymore. And even if it is all in good fun, Buggy with his lacking self-esteem would not take that well.

This is definitely something I will have to think about for a while!

But I thank you very much for this ask!

#cipher answers #thank you for the ask 💙 #Buggy The Clown #roger pirates #sad buggy headcanons #one piece #one piece headcanon #cw: hospital

[susartwork]

Do you trust him?

Extra versions under the cut:

Background picture taken from Pinterest

#cw: hospital #tw: hospital #Or at least I think it's a hospital ;w; #That's what I wanted. #my art #undertale #undertale au #utmv #underwizard #sans #uw!sans #Canon scene we'll probably never see in comic. #Just know that he's committing his usual crimes (ФωФ )

[cashthecomposer]

This is a post asking for help.

Please reblog & share.

Hey gang, I'm being discharged from the hospital after being here since Friday night (so 4 days!). I broke my leg, really severely, after a bad fall. They put a rod in my tibia and secured it with two screws.

Needless to say, I'm in a lot of pain, and I am going to have to have in-home help to help me out with everything from physical therapy to going to the toilet to eating my meals, and that gets expensive. (It was either that or rehab!). Please consider becoming a patron on my Patreon to support my musical theatre work, and help me get through this rough time.

I look dazed and high as hell here, because let's face it, I pretty much am with all the medication the wonderful nurses and doctors here have put me on. But I'm going to keep working and writing to the best of my ability- please help me out here by either contributing to my Patreon or sharing this post, out both, so that I can keep my career afloat while I'm recovering!

All my love,

Cash

#cw: bruises #cw: hospital #cw: injury #personal #help #Patreon #musical theatre #diodati #musical #musical theater #musicals #my musical #me #theatre #theater #support #dark academia #chaotic academia #academia #writing #patron #Patrons #hospital #health #surgery #medicine #medical #healthcare #broken leg

[michellemisfit]

It’s that time again… 🤷🏽‍♂️🛌💤

#multiple sclerosis #cw: needles #cw: hospital #cw: medical #cw: cannula

[clvoer]

this was meant to be a quick sketch while i take a break from storyboarding. uh. oops

#clover #clover or3o #clover2020 #or3o #tw: hospital #cw: hospital

[crowbone]

I swear to everything holy that wound vac maintenance is the absolute worst part of this entire hospital ordeal. I can’t fucking believe how awful it is to have raw nerve endings that foam gets peeled away from. I’m dreading this at home. They’re giving me norco for some relief but I don’t know how I’m going to deal with the pain.

#cw: pain #cw: hospital

[austerulous]

Got a scan at the hospital today. Wish me luck. :’)

#the scan is scary enough #but the hospital? #i've had two intensely traumatic stays there #plus the ward i'm going to this time is right beside maternity and that's where a lot of my trauma is centred #cherry on top? it's an internal exam ugh #i don't expect i'll be around much today #happy friday gang ♡ #remember that i love you ♡ #◈ — ooc; puffin speaks #cw: medical #cw: hospital

[whateverdays-art]

had the WORST sleep paralysis of my life on the 31st of march and i am going to make a series of paintings out of it because there is fuck-all else to do with this!!!!

they'll be presented in no particular order and i might have to go slow with these because holy shit it was Bad(tm) but it's gonna be whatever this turns into now because [incomprehensible screaming]

content warnings for medical trauma/abuse/malpractice, hospitals, blood, death, and maybe unreality (???) as we go.

anyway here's part one! (i'll organize them at the end in the order it happened in the nightmare).

also i'm not Entirely Certain Yet but i may put a blorbo into the paintings because that is less painful to think about than myself in the paintings like. literally gonna let one of them soak up my trauma like a sponge maybe idk yet

#cw: hospital #hospital #blood #cw: blood #cw: medical trauma #medical trauma #this is gonna get DARK please be warned #sleep paralysis #nightmares #post traumatic stress disorder #whateverdaysart #nightmare art #sleep paralysis art #dark art

[basicallyjustmuggleremuslupin]

reading the infirmary scene (chapter 26) of crimson rivers while being in the hospital yourself hits differently

#crimson rivers #crimson rivers spoilers #i guess #zeppazariel #hospital #cw: hospital

[sunbeamah]

Chapters: 8/9 Fandom: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Chousou & Itadori Yuuji, Itadori Yuuji & Sukuna | Ryoumen Sukuna, Chousou & Eso & Itadori Yuuji & Kechizu & Sukuna | Ryoumen Sukuna, Fushiguro Megumi/Itadori Yuuji, Kugisaki Nobara/Zenin Maki Characters: Itadori Yuuji, Chousou (Jujutsu Kaisen), Sukuna | Ryoumen Sukuna, Eso (Jujutsu Kaisen), Kechizu (Jujutsu Kaisen), Yoshino Junpei, Kugisaki Nobara, Zenin Maki, Panda (Jujutsu Kaisen), Inumaki Toge, Nanami Kento, Uraume (Jujutsu Kaisen), Fushiguro Toji, Fushiguro Megumi's Mother, Fushiguro Tsumiki Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - No Curses (Jujutsu Kaisen), Fluff, Family Feels, Family Bonding, Family Discovery, this is just an excuse to write them all as brothers, Itadori Yuuji & Sukuna | Ryoumen Sukuna are Twins, Itadori Yuuji-centric, Humor, Minor Character Death, Original Character(s), Swearing, exploring tokyo, Introspection, Sexual Humor, Background Relationships, inumaki has tourettes, Angst, Forced Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Infant Death, Childhood Trauma, Pining, Oblivious Itadori Yuuji, Vacation, Protectiveness, Minor Sukuna | Ryoumen Sukuna/Uraume, Itadori Yuuji is a Ray of Sunshine, Itadori Yuuji is a Good Cook, Disordered Eating, Hospitalization, mentions of a rough childhood, money struggles, Grief/Mourning, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort Series: Part 1 of The Kusozu Brothers Summary:

Itadori Yuuji spent 15 years living as an only child in Sendai. He knew he had brothers in Tokyo, but his Dad (who left him at birth) never texts him back so he's got no way to contact those brothers, really. It's fine— it's not like he loses sleep over it. Sure, he wishes he could meet his brothers, maybe ask them a few things about life, get to know them a little bit. Maybe even make a real friend out of one or two of them. But that's asking a lot from a group of people he'll probably never meet.

Probably.

(NOT!)

#fushiita #jjk #meguyuji #itadori yuuji #yuji itadori #choso #eso jjk #kechizu jjk #kugisaki nobara #yoshino junpei #junpei #JuJutsu kaisen #ao3 #jjk fic #Itafushi #cw: disordered eating #meguyuuji #my fic: trouble in tokyo #link #cw: hospital

[seven-circlllxs]

[GLOW | ❤️] A glow appears from your chest when you first meet your soulmate. - @e-m-p-error (Fizz to Ozzie?)

_- Soulmate Prompts -_

(@e-m-p-error)

Mammon asking him for favors was really nothing new. But this, this was.. Different. Ozzie had been prototyping limbs for Mammon's newest sex toys, working on making new dolls, the usual, when the greenest Sin had contacted him in a panic, blabbering about how his newest brand baby had exploded in the worst way, and do ya think your robo-parts could work as more than doll parts? He reasoned that this fell under the confines of their weird not-contract but also not-not-a-contract of "helping to spread both their sins at once," and so he gathered opposite arms and legs, bundled them into a first aid bag (borrowed long-term from Belphegor), and made his way up into Greed, to Mammon's money-pit state of the art, totally not exploitative hospital. The halls were less than shining, not at all like Belphie's finely polished hospital wings, and tinged with Greed signature money-and/or-vomit green. Asmodeus' heels clicked down the hall, led by nonsense signs that pointed all sorts of directions. He glanced absently at his phone where Mams had texted the room number, and came to the conclusion that he needed to get his ass all the way to the top floor.

Of course.

The elevator was cramped, even with his being in a smaller form, and the slow crawl of the machine's ascent made him feel trapped. When the doors finally opened, Ozzie stalked through the halls and past the leech-demons in nurses uniforms, until he finally stumbled into a room with the curtains drawn and the sick sounds of someone nervously snacking as they waited.

He barely was able to acknowledge that Mammon was speaking to him as the Sin of Lust approached the hospital bed, inspecting the traumatized form swaddled in a cocoon of blankets and bedding. His face was small, his horns mangled, any visible skin scarred white save for a tiny spot on his mouth, giving him a little beak-shaped marking.

Asmodeus knelt at the side of the bed, eyes wide and soft, the bag full of limbs handed over to Mammon in a sort of trance. Nothing else in the room mattered, not right now..

The soft, swirling pinkish-purple glow that poured out from the little imp's chest and the vibrant blue-neon that emanated from his own, the vibrant swirl of light that grew between them filled Oz with all sorts of emotions, confusing emotions that he hadn't thought he was allowed to share.

He hadn't thought he had a true soulmate, not a love.

When Asmodeus' voice finally found him again, it was hoarse, tentative, awed.

"Mams? What's.. What's his name..?"

#In Desire We Trust {Asmodeus} #The Bestest Jester [Fizzarolli] #CENT-ipede [Mammon] #Froggy Little Flips {Fizz x Ozzie} #sorry for the wall of text but- #i have thoughts about them #cw: hospital #cw: hospitalization #cw: vomit mention #cw: injury

[cipher-zoo]

I won't be able to finish opla today, sadly.

Not that I don't enjoy it, I do, so so much.

But my body decided to sent me to the hospital during episode 5 😂

I am okay, but I will have to stay here till at least Monday and after that I will probably have to stay for a few more days, due to the procedures that need to be made.

But, please, nobody worry! I am not in any immediate danger, nor in pain (and if I were I could get the needed meds)

But, I'll try and answer some of the asks in my inbox - not sure how many I manage I am pretty exhausted after this afternoon - while I am stuck here [I see your sad Buggy headcanons my friends and I will answer them all!]

But yeah, if you want to entertain little old stuck me, you can always send a message my way, I always love that chat with everyone! And damn, I got the time now 😂😂😂

#cipher rambles #cw: hospital

[quicksilverlightning]

MEDICAL TALK - WHERE THE HELL HAVE I BEEN?

(General all-around warning for talk of health and hospitals; I don't believe I've included anything too gruesome, but I am pretty plain-spoken below about what's been going on. )

You may remember the last post regarding my health, so here's both a sequel and a prequel as certain things have been cast into a different light.

About two-ish months before the colitis/mono double K.O. back in February, I got a UTI for the first time. There was some abdominal pain and I definitely recall bringing it up to my PCP, though ultimately let it go for not being all that big a deal. It is my suspicion that every thing actually began here instead of at the next round of happenings.

Next round of course being February - there were definitely two different illnesses being dealt with and the symptoms sort of fed on each other to keep me knocked out a solid two weeks; colitis made nauseous and unwilling to eat, while mono simply made me too tired to care. Thay said, the treatment plan I eventually landed upon did take care of things; beyond some residual symptoms, which were honestly expected, I thought it was going well.

I had a genuinely lovely April weekend - went to some local markets, hit a few stores I hadn't been to in a while, took the boys out a bit. When I first felt the same symptoms in the same place while kicking back thay Sunday evening, I was more annoyed that anything.

Really? This again?

I got in with my PCP that Tuesday, got the same meds again, albeit with a much less powerful pain pill, and went home, confident this would just be another go round.

While Mom and Mimi were worried about how much longer it was taking to get better, I was quick to remember that my first go with this was while on hydrocodone; it made sense to me that perhaps the first time wasn't faster, just better masked.

Meanwhile, my PCP was attempting to contact a gastro specialist. I do not know why this took so extraordinarily long, nor how I came to be involved in the game of phone tag, but there it is. The pain had been steadily moving from my left side, where it has always been, and seemed to be gathering in my abdomen instead.

I finally got to see a specialist, though her advice to go to the ER had nothing to do with any gastro trouble and more to do with me showing signs of afib (160!) and dehydration. Oddly enough, at no point did I notice my heart beat was that crazy, even after being directly told.

Anyway, the ER gets me fast tracked to the back to start dumping all the fluid ever into me and get my heart rate down. They can't even look at whatever's going on in my abdomen until they get me stabilized; sometime around 2am I got an actual room, which was nice.

Next up, I get a go in the CT scanner where they find a large abcess. Yes, I know, gross. My abdomen is badly swollen (I believe I heard 18cm) and needs to be drained so they can get a better look at what's going on in there, like trying to assess flood damage - you gotta drain the water first. Luckily, it's all between my skin and not in any of my organs, which would be an entirely different battle.

As of now, I've been in the hospital for about three days and will likely be here another three more, depending on what the eventual next scan finds. It's currently up in the air as to whether I'm going to need surgery or not.

The running theory is that the infection in my intestines passed through a fistula caused by the inflammation where it began doing damage there instead. Right now, all anyone can do is play the waiting game as the fluid drains away.

So, that's where I am right now; I'm simply too tired for any fandom nonsense and even if I weren't, I've been completely thrown off my rhythm and out of my headspace. I do not know when, or even if, I will ever get back to any of it. I want to certainly, but won't be making promises that may be out of my ability to keep. I have no idea how long I'm going to be in the hospital, or what sort of recovery process I'm looking at after, but I doubt I'll be going upstairs anytime soon.

#tw: medical #cw: medical #tw: hospital #cw: hospital #tw: health #cw: health #personal update