me: okay, i’m going to work on my essay this morning, work out in the afternoon, and do laundry this evening; then if my roommates are up for it we can continue that kdrama we’ve been watching
my adhdemons:
20 notes
·
View notes
things i’ve heard college students say pt. 29
-you may be into Sucky mpreg but some people believe the holocaust didn’t happen
-humans should have a mating season where we all congregate in a river once a year to find love like salmon
-granted, there is a difference between being a momma’s boy and being Normon Bates
-Only in a poli sci class would you get a picture of the live action winne the poo and Kim Jon un next to one another
-“get ready for the met gala with me!!” influencer vlogs showing up on my suggested as if I don’t make $10.73 an hour
-no way that dog had a blog, dogs can’t read
-in god we bust
-every guys wants to be a golden retriever boyfriend until they wake up with no balls
-graphic design majors are like the diet soda of the art world
-if i could choose between having a successful career and lying down i would choose lying down
-today’s graduation is sponsored by plan b
-going down on a woman and tying her fallopian tubes with my tongue like a cherry stem
-most of the world’s problems would be solved if more billionaires disappeared in submarines
-you come face to face with god at a 24 hour ihop
-she lemony on my snicket until there’s an unfortunate event
-took a shit in the gender neutral bathroom, call that a she/it
-the tornado dodged us cause someone told it that it had to pay a cover for every bar it destroyed
-can I have a cars 2-themed blowjob, please
-the best thing Taylor Swift has done recently is get some girls to consider that they may be the problem
-“I’M LITERALLY SO FERAL” no Ava you’re just drunk and white
325 notes
·
View notes
academia aesthetic help me write my reflection paper
121 notes
·
View notes
Biology rizz: I'm jealous of your heart because it's pounding inside of you and I am not.
Volcanologist rizz: damn girl are you volcanic ash and spatter? Because you’re intoxicating
Historical rizz: they’ll call me patron of the arts the way I’m paying for furry porn
Econ rizz: baby, I‘ve got the supplies, the question is, do you have the demand.
Environmental science rizz: I must be the climate crisis the way your ignoring me
Physics rizz: looks like you forgot to account for my gravitational pull
Philosophy rizz: I stopped checking for monsters under the bed when I realized society was the monster
Chemistry rizz: Call me Marie curie bc a hug without u would be life ending
754 notes
·
View notes
I went into this exam with good vibes, no knowledge, and ao3 on my mind and somehow the exam was great
I should do this more often
192 notes
·
View notes