#clearly doing something right. i guess.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#i was looking through old photos today. they where from wjen i was like 1 and it made me so sad #bc my mum would have been like only a year or 2 older then i am now and she looked so young #and now she has an abdomen full of tumors and blistered hands and feet. theyre prob gonna hsve to remove her bladder #but shes still very pragmatic abt it. but she grew up in a house where no one really cared about her feelings so she made them small #and now her mother calls and doesn't ask how her grandkids are doing and doesn't ask how her daughter is doing. im cursed with terrible #grandparents on both sides but i resent my mothers mother worse. though my dad said i probably wouldnt have survived his upbringing #and hes right. my nana has like zero empathy and cant cook for shit. idk how my parents r so normal but the fact i had a good upbringing is #probably the only reason im still here. and thats the other thing that made me sad abt the old pics. just looking at this little baby with a #fucked up head and thinking: in 25 years that kid is gonna b so broken down their not gonns kno what to do or how to fix it. idk whats wrong #with me. ive always been some stage of miserable but i used to b able to get things done. and now i cant seem to force functionality #and it sucks. bc im home now and i still feel like im cringing around this open wound in my chest. but whatever #as of today ive started taking ab1lify. hopefully it helps in the long term but in the short term it triggers my 0cd. which is not fun #its so frustrating. whatever. i also found out my eyes used to not work together. not enough to have a lazy eye but it was hard for me to #read and apparently my eyes were tracking at like double the speed of a normal person. wtf is wrong with my brain? also also my mum was like #yea i never would have guessed bip0lar but we thought it was something. autism i could see 100% but yea didnt see that coming. ao i guess #i brehave like a bit of an oddball. ans my nana would bother my dad to try to make me participate in church and my dad was like no. she #clearly don't wanna b here lol. ay. they did the best they could which i appreciate #unrelated

[widevibratobitch]

.

#im so tired of this lalalalalalalalaa #something is Wrong lol #i really need this therapy on wednesday but guess WHAT im not going. im going to a funeral instead 🤡 #and ill be singing in that stupid fucking church because have to but i dont fucking wanna i hate doing it and i hate churches #all i feel rn is the overwhelming urge to selfdestruct and like obv im not gonna kms now #but im so fucking angry that im not even *allowed* to do that anymore. like it was such a comfort all this time to know that i can just Quit #and now i cant because guess what someone has to take care of my mother 🫠 and im so fucking tired of being someone people depend on #to handle THEIR feelings and THEIR emotions and just take it all with humility and acceptance and kindness and never snap and bite back #like i dont WANNA hear about your dead husband i dont wanna hear about your stupid fucking boyfriend #i dont wanna hear about the new guy/girl who's hitting on you because you're so hot and perfect #i dont wanna be responsible for how people feel. i should just shut up and take it and be humble and never ask or expect anything back #but when is it MY turn to call at 1 am crying about how im tired and want to kms #or to start expecting shit of people and allow myself to get properly angry at them for not meeting those expectations #or to braggingly 'complain' about something the other person clearly lacks without any consideration for their feelings #or to just openly cry and say deeply personal shit without any filter not caring if that other person is clearly uncomfortable af #because *i* need it right now and i need someone to listen and let them worry about how to even respond to that stuff #im just so tired of people expecting shit of me im tired of being made responsible even tho i clearly cannot handle that responsibility #i wanna be mean i wanna snap and get angry and openly say that i dont give a shit and am tired and cant listen to this rn #but i cant because i have to be a motherfucking mother theresa and never dare to demand something for myself #and idk where that comes from. idk if it's coming from the fanatic catholicism of my childhood or my mother or just from myself and idc #i just feel so horrible and guilty and wrong for wanting anything for myself #and it once again feels like im making myself the victim and the tortured martyr here when i should just shut up and take it #i just wanna lie down and die and not care about who'll get angry or judge or blame me for it im tired and i dont know what to do #i want someone to take care of ME and reassure ME and make ME feel like i matter and that they really will help me if i ever need it #and that they'd be kinda sad if i were gone not because i had a role to fulfill that i failed at by killing myself but because i am a person #<- math calculations flying around my head as i come to the terrible realisation #of just why exactly im so deeply obsessed with my voice teacher (aside from her being literally the most beautiful woman alive lol) 🤡 #like babygirl stop being so utterly overwhelmingly kind to me my knees are weak i would do anything for you queen and I MEAN IT

[invinciblerodent]

the pros of being in a large fandom include that there are a lot of people in it with you. the biggest con of being in a large fandom is that there are a lot of people in it with you.

#like obviously I don't particularly care about how someone plays their game #i obviously don't care about them posting things that I feel are wrong #clearly I just scroll past; maybe block silently if I know I don't want to see more #but. i do grow weary #squirrel speaks #god so many people are just so wrong. about so much. #and in so many ways. #there are few things more obnoxious than a person saying a glaringly wrong thing and then adding something to the effect of #“and you know I'm right” #like.... well I didn't care originally but now.... i guess I hate you?????? blocked?????? i guess????????? #sorry for your loss (me)?????? #also sorry that you appear to be illiterate that must really suck for you?????? #ugh ignore me just ranting

[leatherbookmark]

an interesting thing abt jgy antis is like. where is the source of their, shall we say, negative opinion of jgy? like, 1. jgy is a villain, he does horrible things with no remorse, he’s willing to do everything to achieve his selfish, egotistical goals. --> 2. the source of this claim: this, this and this scene. --> 3. alright, but to me -- says someone who’s not an anti -- this reads differently. that he did all those things, and did them on purpose and without remorse, is not that obvious to me. why do you think that? --> 4. well, obviously because he’s a villain and does horrible things with no remorse.

like... he’s evil because he does bad things, and he does bad things because he’s evil. i’m interested in how antis came by those opinions, but a, unfortunately i have them all blocked, and b, even if i or someone else made a poll, it wouldn’t be authentic because no sane anti is going to say “well, people hated him and wrote all those things about him on twt, so i started hating him as well”, or “i only care about wgxn, you could sell me anything about other characters if your arguments were convincing enough because i zoned out during the parts when wgxn weren’t on screen/pages of the book”. it’s all “written in the book/shown in the show” and “logical arguments you’d agree with if only you could read”.

#thinking back to my early c/q/l days where i reblogged this dumb ass meta abt how jgy FOR SURE pushed lxc away because he WANTED HIM #to be tormented by uncertainty forever. like 'the worst person you know just saved your life; what now' kinda thing #i was like oh... THIS IS SO RIGHT... because it felt bittersweet and painful and i am Still guilty of accepting/agreeing with headcanons #or interpretations that aren't 100% what i think because i have this ingrained idea that other people are always more mature and #sophisticated and smarter than me and so they Know Better #the person (i think?) later went on to write a meta abt how jgy is a badwrong narcissist. so #(this is also the reason why i spent months praising and getting excited abt a fic where jgy was dating nmj for like a decade despite #not loving him; and why he cheated on him many times with lxc Just Because. i didn't think jgy would do something like that but everyone #else was like omg this is SOOOOO good so i was like shit i guess it is! IT'S SOOOO GOOD OMG;;;;; have i mentioned i have no brain on #my own? yea) #anyway i'm not gonna paint myself as this genius from the first watch because I Too had wgxn goggles fucking ON and didn't even notice #the box hand touch during my first watch. (have i mentioned i am not very smart or observant) and when wwx was whistling ghosts at jgy #and jgy was clearly Going Thru It in the guanyin temple i was like 'haha good for him' #but iirc i Was nonetheless drawn to him (although xy was first <3) and it was like. well he's evilbad but maybe he felt bad when he murdered #his child? --> well maybe he's not 100% evilbad... maybe... --------------> a-yao did nothing wrong and i will kill you if you even suggest #otherwise. (<-- a joke.) #anyway a whole bunch of antis seem like kindasorta stuck in that initial wgxn-centered; everyone else either has 2 personality traits Max #or is either wgxn allies (good) or wgxn Haters (we hates them forever!) just like. unwilling to accept any new viewpoints At All #and then there are Types of those jgy antis because you have people who hate him for Other Reasons and people who hate them because they. #honestly seem like they've only read moralistic books for young children where the brave kind hero is the one you're supposed to cheer for #and want to be like; and the villain has all the traits you're supposed to know are Bad (mean greedy selfish lazy etc) AND NOTHING ELSE. #its like that *man who only saw boss baby watching another movie* damn this is giving me some serious boss baby vibes ! meme #anyway. love it when the tags are 3x longer than the post. cheers #shrimp thoughts

[nianeyna]

sometimes I think about how much of my core personality traits were shaped by my preschool therapist

#like central to my personality is that I will say no clearly and firmly #and I will not back down #that was something Trina TAUGHT me #that was something I LEARNED how to do! #but I learned it so early on it's just like part of me now #and idk you know I guess if your parents teach you something and it becomes part of you that's not that weird #so like if you have other influences at a young age so it goes #maybe I'm overthinking it #but it's weird right? kind of?

[tekablade-chronicles-3]

Can ANYONE at all on this platform PLEASE be normal about Rogu ??

Posts that even do so much as mention the poor guy are scarce as is, but ALL OF THEM that i've seen treat him like he's some kind of shiny new boytoy for gay people or something !! Y'all ?? Does this make NO ONE ELSE uncomfortable ?? How ? The fact that I'm seeing this from the Yujikiri crowd of all people makes me supremely uncomfortable...

He's a child. He acts like a child. He's clearly stated to be the little sibling of the Rulid Trio. His main trauma is shown to be tied to strong abandonment, loneliness and self-worth issues, which he is seeking to heal by forging familial bonds with our main characters, which ends up putting him in the role of a little kid brother.

And people are seeing this character and thinking about how hot he is and the myriad kinks they can associate with him ?? I'm sorry, but what...? The same people who rave about Eugeo being such a beautiful tragic character and how precious his relationship with Kirito is ? Those people ?

Honestly I feel like I just lost a mildly safe space here ( and I say only mildly because some of the shit some people say is extremely alienating to me as an aro person who yes, loves Eugeo and Kirito's non-platonic relationship. but seriously, how do you gayasses manage to uphold the rules of heteronormativity in your gay ship posts ? there's myriads of types of love and attraction that aren't romance ! you can do better at inclusivity ). Even just for browsing around, let alone interacting.

Truly I chose the wrong character to become attached to after my Lycoris binge.

#sword art online #sao lycoris #sao last recollection #sao rogu #rogu #i do wanna clarify this is not an attack on any specific user here #i've seen fantastic yujikiri posts and blogs and i've seen ones that make me want to scream and tear my hair out #in anticipation of anyone who would retort using something like this as an argument : #yes i do think shipping kirito and rogu is just as weird as shipping kirito with silica #silica can have her one-sided crush it's fine these things happen #but suggesting kirito should reciprocate ? big no no for me. #suguha is a different case entirely since she did have romantic feelings for him at some point but clearly those are fading over time #and their relationship as siblings is getting healthier too #but i'm not here to do a commentary on sao shipping in general #y'know. i guess i should've been expecting something like this to happen sooner or later considering how harem-focused the gameverse is #why wouldn't people want to sexualize every new character am i right ? #ugh. #what's true is that the design of rogu's outfit is definitely NOT helping people's view of him. hate that for me. #teka rambles #if people treated rogu half as decently as they treated silica i wouldn't be making this post

[gamingdotcom]

hold the fucking phone wyll. you're going to stand there and tell me you dont understand why this man is willing to sacrifice himself for someone else. YOU are saying this. man who... well. i have some questions. im going to have to sit and chew on this, sincerely... i dont know what to make of that

#like i understand why he says this but at the same time i dont at all #like i think he's right to say it sounds like nonsense like clearly something is up here #is wyll having a richard dawkins moment #like ok i get that he's getting a taste of the other end of martyrdom but at the same time of all people i think wyll would- #-have a certain amount of self-awareness in this situation #i guess he does pretty explicitly say that he doesnt think the reward is worth the sacrifice #but does wyll believe that gale is exclusively doing this for his goddess' forgiveness and not-- you know-- to save the lives of others? #i guess im operating with more information than he is at the moment-- right now they just want to get the tadpoles out #and theres this cult that is in their way #so the equation would essential just be gale's life + collateral for the other companions' lives #idk it just doesnt square for me bc gale is thinking about this as a utilitarian and like sure mystra will forgive him but #he seems pretty focused on the destroying the absolute bit #more information needed ig #the durgening

[persephoneflouwers]

-

#so I was on Instagram #you know how ive been talking about pinguini tattici nucleari for some time #i think they used to be an indie band now they signed with… drum rolls please #🥁 🥁 🥁 🥁 more suspense 🥁 🥁 🥁 #columbia reconds!!! you guessed it right #I don’t know when they did actually (i guess near sanremo a few years ago? but I don’t know) #anyway lately they have grown so fucking big #like… severely big. stadium tour big. campovolo big you know? #they did the ‘last’ show two days ago in the RFC arena in reggio emilia (yeah the same harry was in july… funny) #and yesterday they announced the tour will continue in arenas #today tickets are on sale #it’s fucking nuts honestly #I don’t see a reason why artists would do such thing after an entire summer of stadiums tour? #I don’t understand this constant running and running and running as if there’s a countdown or something #it’s exhausting to me and im not even the one doing anything lmao #but just the idea of this rush like somebody is chasing them it’s ridiculous really #it clearly shows how the industry is headed to release things to consume and not really enjoy #it’s a meaning deprived world never a contetn deprived world #you know when they introduced fast food chains because people were so busy to even sit down and enjoy their meal breaks? #this is the same thing but with music and artists #it’s no sushi bfr that shit takes time to cook and prepare #that’s the fastest mc toast or something #which is honestly quite saddening but it’s just me and my old fashioned heart

[unproduciblesmackdown]

april autism acceptance month posting, the musings of (going for Self Acceptance as well) from the desk of milo unproduciblesmackdown....

mostly just having reflected on like, huh, might be that By And Large one is more nonspeaking than one thinks....that i've Been like "well sure in person i'm usually markedly Quite Quiet but also secretly a mile a minute chatterbox." like already aware of factoring in the Quietness in terms of like, generally always having been in everyday situations where i don't Want to talk. which also means being aware of like, someone the other day was talking about how the ""normal"" approach (which is not even simply Non Autistic, just the "ideals" in any sense that are Not That, yet positioned as such, to the disempowering Othering of others/anything else) is that verbal exchanges are often nigh exclusively about coming into it with some Goal in mind and just being dead set on that exact inflexible outcome / the other person's input can probably really only get in the way of that. used to be asked How Was Work by family and if i answered in the accurate negative would be told how it wasn't that bad actually; then why even ask. nowadays i know i'm virtually only spoken to to say something At Me; the other day frustrated by this & had an "exchange" where, when being [Talked At] for a sec, didn't really verbally respond at all, which was not considered a wrench in the proceedings in the least, as i expected........relevantly as well, i'm v aware of Talking becoming markedly more difficult if drained &/or stressed (or, w/immediate relevancy, the Talking being especially miserable atm, causing that exhaustion/stress w/high efficiency). that somewhat more Freestyle "normal" communication can include "you have to speak to acknowledge another person's presence, or its hostile" and that speaking is the especially Hollow Scriptathon of things like, getting hit with the "how are you [misgendering]" which, absorb the punch of misgenderment, gear up for Speaking which also is already "wrong," too much delay, remember that you never answer How Are You with how you are, and sometimes just not Pretending to answer and just repeating the question is not particularly more negatively regarded than any other way you approach it

musing on the [it's all bizarre but definitely getting shit for being audhd / nonbinary] childhood / first twenty yrs of life mysteries, like, well when being lectured as it were, which was nothing if not an intensified hollow scriptathon (see: the perfectly harmonious resonance in "how you navigate existing around an abuser" and "how you navigate existing anywhere but expressly personally friendly/safe spaces, being autistic") too demeaning to be borne, where it would be wrong to not make eye contact, then making forced eye contact (and learning how to just like, approach it as a [go through the motions] detached thing) was also wrong, it was wrong to not seem distressed and also to seem distressed; and it's like oh yeah back then & even now i can be as Stressed as anything but there's always a shift where if i make myself Talk i may cry like immediately, which i virtually never do out of otherwise being unhappy/stressed. there's how one of my most genuine friendships in elementary school (the autistic time as well of: many/more friendships from all public school times were other people Deciding we should be "friends;" sometimes this being like, the friend In Charge, and then: me, conveniently) was one where i don't think we actually Spoke. may not be a typical neurotypical thing. there's also the fact our being Distracted by interacting, that is, [not talking] during not even a lesson where the stakes were like "you haven't put this sheet in your folder at the exact time Instructions demanded you to, no sooner or later???" was punished more dramatically (and individually. classic) than i ever saw anyone get for Being Distracted / Not Paying Attention or certainly for talking. very nd of me for that too; like the Especial disdain teachers would have if i Was talking and too caught up in the exchange to notice it was supposed to be the quiet times now, which of course was wilfull disrespect for authority.....like oh but believe me i have that too lmfao, and these instances do not counter it. f for my friendship with jacqueline b/c we weren't allowed to sit next to each other and the disproportionate/extraordinary qualities of the response made it so it was hardly clear we were even allowed to interact at all, for all intents and purposes. great

certainly verbality at all can be a whole challenge too overall, but w/focus on the speaking....truly the mile a minute speaking / voluminous writing of things Happens, but it's sure when i get to talk About something, and the High Motivation boost of [whatever's being talked about] is quite necessary b/c it sure still takes effort lol....This is taking effort, to be sure. meanwhile there's also the damper of like, people's Disinterest / Dismissal meaning that just b/c you talk doesn't mean anyone hears you, to an extent it's nigh literal lol, beyond double empathy problem misunderstanding (plus that: ppl know they don't have to understand, &/or can choose to (pretend to) misunderstand / know they don't get it, but don't have to) there's also just like, not bothering to process what you say; being the one talked over like you weren't saying anything, lack of any response at all like you weren't saying anything, someone else cutting in and you may as well no longer be here / nth wheeling in any group. the times i've had to say something which needs a response / to be absorbed, and fighting for my life doing so / reiterating like half a dozen times / repeating this later, multiple times, b/c i know someone may give you the "politeness" of Looking At You / nominal spoken stock responses, while not absorbing it / forgetting it after 5 sec..........to be sure, times i've had an extensive, specific, belabored exchange (plus alllll the extra effort to emphasize Amicability in it) that got such responses, only to have it later clear they didn't actually absorb the point they'd apparently gone "right, okay" to. times i've [that] and then 5 min later had the person i'd talked to come over to be like "oh did you say [the thing i said to them]" only b/c some third party had overheard and actually processed it, then in turn had what They conveyed to that person i'd talked to actually listened to; had "i am once again asking" agonies multiple times over months & months only eventually fulfilled, spontaneously, by someone else entirely....

also that, when i Was able to having amicable, comfortable, in-person exchanges, my ""small talk"" friendly engagement to nonhostilely acknowledge someone / have an exchange involves Verbal Bits (running gag for Dinnermaking Convo to pretend to be on iron chef, and all named chef geoff, for example) or Nonverbal Ones (entering one's peripheral vision and dancing until acknowledged, to be funny, or ignored, also to be funny) or even simply that the amicability can come from other people, in spite of it all, by just not interpreting my operating while being myself and not constantly going out of my way to try to expressively reassure someone i'm friendly to them being met with [people just not deciding they hate me and/or i am beneath them] like, some great times lol. friendships where we didn't Really start talking for eons, and i go "guess people gotta be patient" like well sure lol. and then they gotta like how i Do interact

and the next bit of "can't believe you keep learning; realizing things" is just going like "ohh wait, was thinking of one's inherent value within a framework of [noninherent value you can so totally Bootstraps Earn we swear]" lol like....even in terms of like "nd people are the backbone of your fandom" type things like, well yeah they are; and that "sometimes people think it's neat that you can draw" like yeah it is and sometimes they really are; but that it's like, but Forget It re: thinking of that like "well so that Makes Up For [being autistic] as it might usually negatively impact socializing by 'normal' standards" like, to hell with making up for anything. i like to post about interests and draw about them and it's fun when people enjoy them and it can be fun to Talk About something / interact through that; it's not like "ableism: over" nor making up for anything, and what can really come of thinking it has to be Valued by how it might make other people see You as more inherently worthwhile yourself than they otherwise would've, right. i'm like "well i don't always express myself xyz ways but at least i do in other ways i suppose" but end the sentence before the But. i'm not As Good(tm) As Allistic through the [expressing myself] i do through drawing, and that's fine b/c autistic ppl having talents people value isn't the antiableism key lol. next i can be [tfw autistic ppl try to go Above & Beyond at work to "make up for" being autistic] or employers being like "hey maybe hire autistic people" not to be Inspirationally Inclusive in theory or whatever but b/c it's like, they'll be exploitable / valuable as exploited employee. like how autistic people get fired or burned out and then it's like whoops, we need like 5 new hires to replace them; who wasn't promoted, paid, or recognized as doing 6 ppl's work. everything being [popularity contest] actually. not to say Posting For Fun is the exact same as formal job lmfao nor randos like employers; but essences remain, see: that resonance with [reacting to abuser's attention] behavior and [interacting with randos out & about, trying to be deemed Friendly Normal Correct enough] behavior. the throughline that people won't regard you as having inherent value unless they regard people as having inherent value, on principle

i do have peak success like, an art post is very tl;dr billboard for Your Existence lol. and then if people are interested enough in whatever brand of [saying shit] i do? probably promising start to whether interactions with me won't be [their interest is exhausted within a day] lol. find some fellow nd people by crossing paths via interest, which is a Talk About Something thing. and even then, of course, you're not guaranteed friends with every other nd person. Spontaneous Alignments, everyone's friend....while at this juncture it's like, hmm, maybe i Am actually not like. theoretically interested in [i want to have new friendships] lmao. thinking about what they're supposed to be? what i could even think of them hypothetically being? invokes no [i want that] feelings. thinking of someone else saying, in a different context, how he doesn't think anyone's Guaranteed any kind of companionship, which i agree with (vs. ppl talking about it like Bootstraps Merit like yes you can Deserve a romantic partner, and Deserve friends too, and a general appeal/likability/personableness will be concomitant w/a Deserving person); thinking of someone else talking abt, in a different context, how her experience being racially othered means she just doesn't end up liking being around people at all / prefers being alone. the first guy talking about how he doesn't Preclude new relationships but he also approaches w/deliberation like, navigating being content being alone. thinking abt stuff talking about [autistic ppl who want romantic relationships] that mention ppl having to go ahead and work on being okay with the idea they may very well never have one. the questioning of [relationships] and [community] in a consciously political context; what's it mean for someone to have Relationships, be in a Community, would that be Required of them for them to deserve / get to expect to receive [xyz] that everyone theoretically would. thinking of relationality as acknowledgment of the realities of ways things, incl people, affect each other, the results of that

that's about all lol might "ideally" be more nonspeaking than i gave myself credit for; only shifting towards "i give myself inherent value on principle and can only be regarded as having inherent value by others Also on principle" like no [bootstrapping earning shit] as a way to also see value in what i do either lol

#extremely delayed BaDumTsh yesterday like ''oh yeah that fanbase that Was smallish for several years that i Was generally active in and Was #trying to socialize in b/c it seemed like the thing you do?'' like yeah i knew i could barely bring myself to talk in an overall groupchat #(b/c i don't like real time exchanges usually; hadn't really talked directly much w/many of the people in it lol) and i also know that this #trepidation was interpreted as ''well they were invited but guess they don't wanna participate'' lmao like classique. which in turn is like #yeah now i'm really loath to just pop in lol. and say something for a [oh shit did salsa kill someone's parents] effect #and i also already knew that there were like two or three Other groupchats for that fandom i was not at all privy to over the yrs lmao #but yesterday it was like ''oh that was a general groupchat everyone was in? yeah i never even heard of that one lmao'' #which if The Person Reading This is who told me: do not be embarrassed lol it is Extremely Irrelevant emotionally #like i Already learned from those experiences [yeah i wasn't in the gcs] and [yeah i was peripheral socially] and [yeah i always felt kinda #out of place / agonized Trying to socialize More / Right b/c it was just clearly: gonna be like that lmao] #like being that backbone of a fandom ndly or being that [your posts are approved] contributor: you're still a rando; still autistique w/it #never ''made up for'' anything and would never have #shoutout to us second graders becoming friends through spontaneous indoor recess lego parallel play #enough of a: #long post xoxox

[vvitchering]

My last day at the horrible job was today :) I made it. Gonna try and recover from being a depressed anxiety mess and figure out where I go from here.

#I know I’m gonna have to do some work to recover from how badly this hurt me mentally #because I know logically I should be happy and excited but I’m STILL FUCKIN ANXIOUS #FOR NO REASON #it’s like I forgot how to feel other feelings #of course now that I’m unemployed I no longer have any health insurance so I can’t even go get therapy I clearly need lmao #guess I could read some self help books or something right? #go stare at the ocean? #that sounds beneficial #life

[lycanqueer]

honestly i should be grateful that i don't have more vehicular close calls given how much driving i do

but every time it happens i just wonder how there can possibly be so many godawful drivers in this area that this happens like once a month

#and by ''this'' i mean narrowly avoiding impact with another vehicle #i don't even count when people try to merge on top of me or do something similarly stupid #this old man fully just tried to tbone me because i guess he either didn't know i was there #or thought he had the right of way when he clearly didn't #but please. y'all. pay more attention.

[faerociousbeast]

i hate fandom poll tournaments!! like actually

#these are nothing like the chuunin or hunter exams #or well they are but in the bad ways #theyre trying to kill each other for the chance to win a title that will change their entire lives #youre trying to kill each other bc. your blorbo lost mostlikelytoeatburgers contest???? #like..... alright i guess but i AM going to judge #and even the people who try to be civil get attacked so fucking much like is this worth it. is this genuinely worth the stress #the only poll i care about anymore is that one nobody poll w the traits and stuff #and my guy literally lost first round fhjdjfjdkg rip fellow detective fae #but yeah this is all the worst parts of fandom right out in the open and nobodys immune 😭 #like i get it i really do!! it sucks seeing your thing lose to something you view as undeserved #but have you seen the worldwide naruto polls. #people wont vote for the actual Reason the poll is running #they arent that moralistic in these things they arent all reading your propaganda and thinking Hmmm clearly this makes more sense #so i should vote #most of em are seeing 'omg it would be funnie to make anee may boys lose' and going haha yeah #so again i get seein your faves lose and trying to campaign for them can be emotional #but the people who get so..... its just all such a mess #the stakes really do not need to be this high

[gayopinion]

everyone's so used to everything being readily available i hate when people share something they've made and get pestered to produce it and sell it like clearly ppl saying that don't own small businesses or understand manufacturing at all like not everything that is created is done so with the intent to commodify it. and also, not everyone has to share what they make, it can JUST be for them. bye

#just came across this song run away to mars by TALK u should listen it's good right ok #but they wear these sick overalls in their video and tiktok comments are like do you sell these? you should!!! #because them and their gf make them #like. the logistical NIGHTMARE that would be buying supplies and handsewing overalls and then shipping them #they're clearly a musician not everyone makes something for the sole purpose of profiting off of it #it's one thing to make merch it's another to just have a handmade fashion line you sell as a side business ...... #and another thing i saw was a mom whose kid asked for a mario squishmellow which i guess doesn't exist #so they made one themselves for their kid and people were like can you sell these pls omg! #like idk guys i would imagine a mom with a young kid is probably busy and also just doesn't want to do that for multiple reasons. go away #also sometimes my friends will see my nail art and be like omg open up an etsy! like i am a full time college student. def do not have time #not the desire to....... i'm just making this stuff for Me thx tho #ALSO. in this economy? in this state? with the way customers act? bye.