As someone whose been off of E since 2017 I can say that rolling isn't what it's use to be. I'm not advocating it just because nothing bad happend to me personally.
Things are getting laced and filled with very dangerous substances!!!!! Very lethal batches are going around Los Angeles!!!!!!! I live in the valley and unfortunately shit gets around here in L.A county fast.
You can die just by one pill. Within an hour or so. E has always been known as a party feel good drug but if it's filled with an unknown ingredient you can die. It's very triggering for me to know that bunk batches are going around killing kids. It hurts.
STAY SAFE. AND PLEASE THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU BUY. NO MATTER HOW GOOD THE DEAL IS. YOUR LIFE IS WORTH MORE.
I can pinpoint the moment that destroyed my life today:
It’s been a handful of weeks since Murderbot came within inches of having a new, organic governor module implanted in its head via infection - do you think, maybe, that’s also been hiding behind the redacted? Not the way everything else is, just as a deep-seated reminder of what it can’t afford to lose?
What a way to be told “I love you” - to be told “I will not lose you, I will not let go, I will do the hard part of holding on even if you don’t want me to”
i was thinking about tim & his interesting (to me) relationship with physical distance from gotham & how he will often choose to leave to clear his head in moments when he's unsure of life or just not doing very well.
& to me the parallels between the fact that his parents used their trips as a way to try to salvage their marriage & how while he had issues about feeling like they left him behind to go on adventures, he also probably internalized some of the need to get away to think from them.
like robin i, we have tim choosing to leave gotham (& his parents, which was very hard and strange for him) immediately after the events of rite of passage and his mother's funeral & him officially getting the robin costume. and he goes to train, but he goes to train because he feels unsure about his place and whether he's really ready to be robin.
and then we have him choose to leave again to finish his training after the death of young el & tim's inability to save him.
and then he leaves again to go help danny temple after bruce gives away his identity to stephanie & he's struggling with the betrayal of bruce & steph with that whole thing.
and then he leaves for bludhaven after his dad & steph die.
and then bruce, dick, & tim leave gotham during 52 to heal after the events of infinite crisis.
and then he famously leaves gotham to go have his around the world breakdown & search for bruce in red robin.
&&for all of these, it's like. the going away is the breakdown, the return is when he truly heals. so it's like to me, i guess. for tim, he has an extremely good head for when he needs to get away and be alone because he's not happy with his status quo or where he is in life. in fact, the first thing he usually chooses to do when he's at a low point or he's not acting like himself is leave to get some distance from his problem, but him being away is also inevitably a sign that he's avoiding his problems & not actually dealing with it (much like his parents going away to work on their marriage was not actually addressing the underlying problem that is the fact that their marriage was fundamentally not working out). and he always comes to the realization after he's had some time alone that he needs to go back to gotham and not avoid the problem in order to actually make headway on dealing with whatever he's struggling with.
because tim is a character where that physical distance is him trying to get some clarity for himself on whatever situation is ailing him, but he can't actually deal with the situation that's ailing him until he returns home to actually deal with it (also related, why him leaving inevitably ends up in him getting wrapped up in other people's problems, so he can avoid dealing with his own). the answer is usually, for him, "oh, i should go home and face it head on". and that kind of tracks for tim in that, imo, that he is not a character where distance heals for him, necessarily, and space isn't what he needs to work things out, he's the kind of person who needs to be there in order to actually resolve the conflict he feels internally. he's a needler--he will poke & prod at the problem until it's worked out to his satisfaction.
Danny hadn't seen Vlad's other form. Not in the entire time he'd known him, nor at any point during a fight.
Oh sure, he'd gone into a ghost form, but never anything else, never anything more. Even Box-Ghost changed sometimes, usually to sit contentedly in one of said boxes until a ghost hunter started to shoot at him. Usually Danny's parents.
He'd never seen it until now, his own leg torn through by an unlucky shot and wings too small to fly as he tried to run. Tried to flee from his parents- tried to get out from the lab while green spattered everywhere.
He'd never seen it until they were trying to cut into him, even if they didn't know it was him. That it was their son. He just needed to get to the Portal, just needed to get out where they couldn't reach.
And then Vlad had arrived, almost seeming to stutter and freeze, everything growing cold. And then burst into flame.
Everything was a blur after that. Everything hurt, more than it should have compared to the injuries he'd suffered before. Painful enough that his vision whited out.
The next thing he knew, he was in the Zone. Not in Amity, not anywhere familiar either. He tried to ignore that fact, just as he tried to ignore the ectoplasm green dripping from slowly (too slowly) healing wounds.
"Where are we going?" he found his voice, however small.
Vlad was quiet, an unreadable expression on his reptilian face, head turned away from him. "Somewhere," he eventually answered, not sounding anything else but exhausted. "I'll figure it out."
"It was easier to stare at the celestial abyss than recognise the emptiness within myself. Easier to pretend my destiny lay among such stars, than work to salvage a life on solid ground. You changed all that.
You see me as I am, and do not find me wanting. With these stars as my witness, I swear - you will always be enough for me."