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call-me-apple · 3 years

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Okay, gonna go on a little rant here, but why do C!Dream apologists/sympathizers get so much shit from this fandom when others (coughcoughC!Wilburcoughcough) apologists get away with the same shit I see people accuse C!Dream apologists for? Like the vast majority of apologists for Dream I've seen have stated that it's best that he and Tommy never interact again, and yet I still see Wilbur apologists saying how he'll heal with C!Tommy around and that he really does care about the teen. Eugh.

Thinking the same thing dude. Don't get me wrong, there are NASTY c!Dream apologists out there, coz members of one group are just never the same, but they're not the majority at all. There are nasty people and nasty takes in every group. But I've seen c!Wilbur apologists spew some really sus shit and they just??? Get away with it??? I've never seen them get publicly called out the same way people constantly hate on c!Dream apologists??? Even though the nasty takes walk the similar line of abuse/manipulation apologism? I've only really seen c!Dream apologists speak negatively about some of the takes that come from c!Wilbur apologists?

c!Wilbur is an absolutely morally fucked character and he's done plenty of nasty shit but so many of his apologists just don't see that at all for reasons of meow meow. And then they get away with straight-up excusing manipulation because he's mentally ill as if that makes the way he twirled all his close friends around his little finger any better. I hate it.

And the way the relationship between c!Tommy and c!Wilbur is viewed is horrifying. No, they are not two wholesome brothers, no c!Wilbur the big brother is not going to hold c!Tommy close and protect him from all the problems of the world. Those two fuckers have one of the most toxic co-dependent relationships on the server where c!Tommy continues to near-blindly follow c!Wilbur everywhere, even if he doesn't always follow his plans, and c!Wilbur relies on putting c!Tommy down and glueing him to his side to build his self-esteem.

Some c!Wilbur apologists have got to open their fucking eyes, they're letting their fave get away with too much shit.

#my asks #anon #apologist discourse #Apple rants #c!Wilbur critical #tw abuse #tw manipulation #tw abuse apologism #one of their worst takes is like #that people only started seeing L'Manbur as evil after Wilbur's spiral #but bro #pretty sure it was his own apologists who started calling Pogtopia Wilbur Vilbur #dunno bout you bud but I thought he was an asshole even when I was watching those S1 vids for the first time #I caught on early on #no obvious mental illness necessary #coz it's not his spiral that makes him evil but his hunger for power which started with L'Manburg not Pogtopia #like no buddy I am not ableist for thinking c!Wilbur is a self-centered prick

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unreasonablebehaviour · 3 years

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Pls take this random assortment of dsmp “hcs” (which is actually just me rambling out my ass but we love to see it//)

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- Sam just like gets really fuccn energetic in a thunderstorm... like just hyperactive but also like v strong..... also immune to electrocution :)

- He’s also like all creepers are, shit terrified of cats which is v funny considering he’s sorta friends with ant

- Even funnier if u want to take the ‘canon’ fact of ant being a whole ass 20 feet tall

- Speaking of ant and this absolutely isn’t a hc but I just find it very funny that people draw humanoid versions of all of the non human characters EXCEPT for ant who I have only ever seen drawn as a cat ghgh

- Bads skin colour is deadass vantablack like if he holds his hand in front of his face it just seemingly vanishes and you can’t pick out where his hand ends and face begins

- I want him to look terrifying.... like absolutely massive a complete unit of a man, sharp ass teeth, sharp spikes and horns, sharp claws, white glowing eyes........... but he’s just like “owo” at all times ghgh

- Skeppy has chronic pain from the diamonds growing inside his body and out of his skin... sometimes he ramps up how cheerful he is to try and hide how much pain he’s in that day

- Ranboo’s body is longer on his enderman side and so he physically can’t stand up straight unless his shorter leg is on a slope

- He’s half silverfish... mainly cause I think that’s funny like hehe both those and endermen are linked to the end/stronghold and can break blocks

- This does also mean he joins bad and skeppy in the ‘help I am v spiky’ club tho

- Also also like absolutely none of his clothes fit cause his limbs are so disproportionately long so rip his ankles in the tundra I guess

- Shortza supremacy

- Sapnap... blaze boy..... I want him to steam when he angy...... v warm to the touch and all of the dteam lay on top of him when it’s cold lmao

- George is like some weird ass mushroom man.... like he looks completely human for the most part but he’s not he just never tells anyone cause he has the mentality of ‘well no one ever asked?’ Or ‘it didn’t seem important’

- When he’s in danger the surrounding plants try to help him (like lmao there’s a war goin on? Nah just take a nap and miss out so you won’t get hurt :) )

- Imagine how much funnier the lmanberg saga would be if schlatt just looked like his profile icon rather than his mc skin.... just cute tiny sheep man in a sweater... I think it’d be like that one gif of the teddy bear slamming its head onto the table to acquire angy eyebrows

- Dreams has symmetrical white patches down the front of skin... kinda like vitiligo but not? Like deadass pure white

- I also kinda just imagine him having creepy solid black eyes ghgh (haha it’s cause he’s possessed)

- He’s immortal and kinda just snapped tbh like half the reason his actions are so manipulative, selfish and drastic are both because he’s so desperate to have control over things in his life and because low-key he kinda hopes that people will find a way to kill him off or get rid of the thing possessing him (I just want a happy ending :( make him not evil pls my poor heart can’t take a non happy for everyone ending//)

- Puffy is fluffy :) I will not elaborate further

- Revived people have creepy blacked out maybe kinda glowing eyes.... paler skin.... scars and phantom pains from their injuries....

- Phil just deadass found Wilbur hiding inside a fridge and took him home with him... wil just assumed the fridge was his mom and Phil found it too funny to correct him

- Tubbo is a moobloom hybrid and all the bees love him ok 💛

- I think it would be funny if dream just deadass can’t see shit through his mask rap considering all the feats he has done

- Phil is v old and ‘wise’ but is also fairly detached from reality as a result cause he can’t really remember what earlier parts of his life were like to understand how other people act

- I also think it’d be hilarious if he ironically had like 0 life skills... cooking? He’s shit at it. Sleep schedule? Never heard of it. Taxes? Isn’t that a state?

- The floors in the tundra trios homes are constantly being ruined by techno having hooves and Phil and maybe ranboo having claws... like u no how u can like dent and scrape a wooden floor with heels? Kinda like that

- Speaking of those three I also think it’d be very funny if they all collectively became useless or started fighting in the presence of a gold block cause like 👀 ‘oo gold/hehe shiny/hold block’ mentality

- Quackity can shapeshift.... but he’s like a ditto and always has the :] face.... mmm also maybe keeps any scars he has

- His ability to control this decreases the more he dies

- So like u could he talking to him and just suddenly he looks like someone else or like a weird mishmash of people and just hasn’t noticed lmao totally not freaky at all

- Literally non of the tundra trio are equipped for the weather like u have someone from the hot af nether, bird man who’d realistically be prone to hypothermia and someone who’s allergic to water like lmao why do yall live here what is wrong with you

- I want niki to just be very exasperated by this fact

- I want her to bake goods for her friends... tailored to their tastes.... cheer up food :)

- Also i forget when she changed her skin but I think it’d be very funny if she dyed her hair pink as an intimidation factor to tommy cause she knows he dislikes techno

- Puffy ily but I do not trust you with Tommy after the disaster that was bbh and skeppys relationship counselling

- The concept of the totems being foolish’s children is very funny to me like just the implication that he just leaves his kids in random chests for people to steal and that when they witness someone die they just explode with revive energy or something like w h a t

- Ghostbur either isn’t actually Wilbur and is just some entity pretending to be him hence the ‘poor memory’ OR him and limbo Wilbur are two halves of one entity

- I just find it v sus that he’s the only ghost that’s ever shown up... and regularly at that

- mmm tubbo hard of hearing.... relies on reading lips the best he can when to help clarify what people are saying but he can hear people well enough if they raise their voice quite loud

- cursed hc but what if ash and Zachary were somehow michael decendants and they like porkums cause he’s either originally a family friend or he just reminds them of stuff

- Ok half of these aren’t even hcs anymore and is just me rambling but who let Karl be in charge of the time travel he has such strong himbo energy

- That being said villain Karl when 👀//

- Why is tubbo like one of the smartest most accomplished people on the sever... he’s like 17..... like my man has been president, developed a new form of fast travel, has a family, developed a nuclear weapons program by himself, launched a man into space, developed a whole town and more .... like who let him have this much power he can barely read//

- I think it’d be funny if techno was just really bad at strategy games..... like ok technically he’s not bad at them but like he just spends 4 days analysing every last minute detail every round to optimise his chances of winning//

- I feel like people don’t give Jack enough credit for the fact he cheated death using nothing but spite

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notphilosopherstudentblog-moved · 3 years

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unnecessary dream smp (but not really) mock trial post

pt. 2

*warning: long post*

I have been having a terrible mock trial season so far, so I decided to cope by theorizing what the dream smp members would be like in mock trial. I will try to explain mock trial terms as much as possible, but all you really have to understand is that it is fake court. it is court roleplay, that’s it

Direct - an interrogation of your own witness to help you prove your case

Cross - an interrogation of the opposing teams’ witnesses to help you prove your case by poking holes in theirs

Case law - the “laws” of the fake world that the American Mock Trial Association set in place that set precedents for how each side is supposed to argue their cases; these are typically in the form of court cases

Voir dire - a preliminary examination of a witness or a juror by a judge or counsel; this comes in the form of opposing counsel interrupting a direct in order to prove that the witness is not fit to make their testimony for one reason or another

Wiggling - the refusal to answer a question with a direct yes or no in order to not weaken a witness’ testimony

Defendant - the person/corporation being charged with a crime

Dream Team and Co.

Dream

everyone hates him as attorney and I say this with full confidence

because he’s hyper-aggressive during cross

but also because he’s right

like a lot

he knows case law like the back of his hand

he made flashcards

and he’s memorized this year’s case like immediately after it comes out

he made spreadsheets and like ten page document for every witness, including what they bring to the case and what makes them a weak witness

I mean come on this is the same dude who played one game and hyperfixated on it so hard that he became one of the best players on the internet

his team loves him because he basically writes their entire case for them, but they’re also worried for him because he just rewrites cases on whim in the middle of the night and doesn’t mention it until someone (usually sapnap) brings it up during practice

back on topic, he usually kills it as an attorney and people are like visibly terrified when he’s their attorney

he was pretty meh as a witness when he first started but he’s actually really good now

he used to be terrible at holding a character during a direct/cross

as he’s gone along and practiced, he’s gotten much better!!!

he’s terrifying to go against as an attorney or witness, but attorney is definitely his strong suit

George

george as an attorney is a concept that I hold near and dear to my heart

I feel like they treat him the same way people treat him playing Minecraft: by severely underestimating him because he makes dumb jokes and is super quiet, but he’s actually really good!!

he’s probably super nonaggressive during cross and directs, but he goes hard during voir dire

he’s like suspiciously good at voir dires

and like forcing people to impeachments

he decimates witnesses and gets their testimonies thrown out

his teammates are suspicious that the other teams are in on it because there is no reason why he should get this many voir dires/impeachments...but he does

(he’s just really good guys, I promise)

it’s definitely not because he’s cute and witnesses don’t know how to handle it and then they slip up and he comes down hard on them

people always forget he set, like, a record for number of voir dires at a tournament, so he has this reputation as being the weakest of the dream team

he’s such a strong attorney

but oh my god his witness

do not, and I repeat, DO NOT let this man be a witness

he cannot act

he just reverts back to his personality and he has No Inflection

you think the British accent will give you points?

they can’t make up for his inability to maintain a character

Sapnap

this man is fucking PSYCHOTIC whether he is attorney or witness

he goes absolutely feral on crosses and it intimidates witnesses so much, even if they’ve been competing for years

he’s just super good at crosses, but do not put him with an emotional witness because he has this remarkable inability to act comforting

his friends can come to him with anything and they’ll talk about it and he’ll comfort them

but it’s like his emotions turn off as soon as he enters a round

it’s fucking wild

you only put him as a witness if you want that witness to have a) feral characterization, b) sexual undertones, or c) both

his witnesses are infamous every year

he is very good for throwing people off their game with out-of-left-field characters and other teams hate him for it

every single one of his characters dresses up like a frat boy trying to dress for court and it’s so funny

but he still gets other competitors hitting him up after comps, men or women

Do Not try to approach him outside of trial though because he is the definition of a quiet kid if he’s not around his friend

he will be too awkward to talk to you

Karl

I love love love Karl to death, but he is not built to be an attorney

he only plays witness

and he’s really good at it!!

he’s super fun as a witness and he wiggles a lot on answers

attorneys hate that he wiggles a lot because it’s frustrating

but there is nothing they can do about it

he doesn’t get a lot of witness roles, but the ones he does get, he kills

he gets an absurd amount of thirst posts on the mock trial confessions facebook page

like an absurd amount

it’s become a joke amongst the dream team

there is a tally kept for how many thirst posts Karl gets

he doesn’t even have to compete

people will just see him in the room and become thirsty

an icon truly

it’s because his character outfits are hot as hell, literally all the time

you have to wear business casual/professional during trial and we all know that Karl would look hot as FUCK in a suit

also everyone in college mock trial is horny

Badboyhalo

bad in mock trial would kill as an attorney

everyone loves bad

even opposing teams

because he’s just so sweet??? for like no reason???

he’s done mock trial since freshman year high school and he’s competed against (and earned the respect of) some of the best mockers in the country

he’s notorious for being super kind outside of trial and during pre-trial

but he’s terrifyingly ruthless during trial

he’s similar to dream and george, but he has a much better reputation

there was an anonymous hate message about bad on the mock trial confessions page and there was a crusade to figure out who it was

(his teammates ended up snitching on him because bad is just that beloved)

he definitely received several scholarships because he is just that good

he does not like witness

so he just does not do it

Schlatt

schlatt is the most iconic mocker

like people outside of mock trial know who he is

he’s trended on twitter

he’s really good at every role he plays, even though he plays them to their most feral extremes

he played an expert last year and spent the entire time heavily implying that his character was god

the worst part is he received a witness award for it at

every

single

tournament

every single one

judges would make a point to commend him after matches

every single time his name got announced at closing ceremonies, people died inside

it was extremely amusing for everyone on the dream team

the same year as his maybe-god character, there was a rash of anonymous confessions about schlatt and wilbur soot from another team

a cross between them at competition was so extremely homoerotic that people began shipping them immediately

this is carried on for the entirety of the season

they played into it heavily

there is still an ongoing bet on whether or not they’ve fucked

Quakity

quackity always ends up playing the defendant and always plays them super sus

memes are made about him simply because he is so suspicious every time

he once brought a guitar and attempted to sing his entire direct because his character was a singer

he was asked to leave by the judge immediately

his teammates made him an award titled ‘quickest disqualification in mock trial history’

he treasures it like a child

his teammates love him because he is hilarious

but they also hate him because he always tries to make his characters’ background that they are or were at one point strippers

no matter if they already have a background laid out by AMTA, alex

he never plays attorney

there is no reason why

he just never does

this became extremely long for absolutely no reason, but I hope you enjoyed it. I wanna do another one for SBI and co, but not right now. I’m writing this at 215 with a Slimecicle video playing the background. I have to be up at 7 for a mock trial tournament

this is helping me cope

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demonboyhalo · 3 years

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The Technoblade Conspiracy

Even before Dream claimed there was a traitor in Pogtopia, there's been a lot of...suspicious activities happening in Techno’s streams. Others on the SMP are already distrustful of him, and the fans are as well, but I believe that we’re focusing on the wrong thing here. This thread isn’t quite a traitor theory, but rather a dive into what Techno has been hiding at large. I can say with utter confidence that the extent of what Technoblade has accomplished on the Dream SMP is being greatly underestimated.

I recommend looking at the sus Techno moments thread by @piggytechnobarb on Twitter for some of the stream clips I'll be discussing.

This is going to be fairly in depth, so the rest is under the cut!

1. There is another room under what Techno calls his "secret base"

I won't talk too much on how strange his choice of "secret base" is for now, but please do keep in mind how out of character it is for man-who-tracked-down-Squid's-college to settle for a home base so unprotected and close to Pogtopia's very well known location.

So, for some reason, there is Polished Blackstone Brick under the floor of Techno’s wall. He accidentally reveals this when a donation asks him to mine the exposed redstone in his wall, acts a bit strange for a good 15 seconds, and then never mentions it again. Sight of the brick prompts him to silently zoom in, fill the hole with stone (not cobble), and say "Don't ask questions".

This is only so strange because there's no real reason for him to have stone at the ready, or any blackstone brick at all. Techno is NOT a builder, and if a creeper blew up down there, he'd fill it with cobble and not give a shit about aesthetics. He doesn't use smooth stone in his base, and has never built with blackstone on stream. Not only are they unusual items for him to have, it's unusual for him to make a point to not have the viewers question it. Yes, it could just be Techno being dramatic, but why did he go silent for a straight 5 seconds at the sight of the blackstone?

Considering who he is as a player, it is completely in character for Techno to build a second base. The lake he lives under is incredibly near Wilbur and Tommy, and he's well aware that all an enemy has to do is watch his stream to infiltrate his base. Techno goes to the extremes when they aren't even required (Ex. His insane skill in party games, beating Skeppy in as niche of a game as Grinch Simulator, etc.) So I don't think it's a stretch for him to go the extra mile, and hide a bunker/resources/extra armour and what have you from even his own viewers.

2. The overpowered illegal villager farm

For those of you who don't watch Ponk, he recently stumbled across an area that is supposedly banned on the Dream SMP - a villager farm. In the clip, his voice is astonished and his confusion is palpable, and he goes so far as to say "It's a full scale arms race" because of how many good trades there are. The location is laced with traps, though he doesn't mention what exactly he had to get past to find the farm. Ponk's reaction is far too genuine for the farm to be his, but then that begs the question, whose farm is it?

...Who is willing to risk Dream's wrath by breaking his rules? Or, alternatively, who is capable of making a secret pact with the server owner to allow such a farm? The answer could only be Technoblade.

Ponk says it himself in the video, he does not have the time to build this. Whoever made this had to have carved out a hidden cavern, lead at least 14 villagers down there, breed them until only the ones with the best trades were left - all off stream, and without another player catching them. Whoever made this had to spend hours of work with no content to show for it, and who do we know has been grinding for DAYS on the server? Technoblade. Not to mention, all the villagers are numbered, and all but one are fletchers.

The signs above each stall are so important, because going so far back as SMP Earth, Techno has a history of dispassionately breeding mobs to his benefit, and then killing any mob not performing well enough. For example, his horse farm: where the horses stay in numbered rooms rather than all being named. The villagers in the screenshot above are numbered rather than named.

Wanna hear a fun fact about Fletchers? They're well known for accepting sticks for emeralds, but will also take string for that trade as well! And guess who has been seen waiting at the spider spawner collecting string by Sapnap, Awesamdude, Quackity, and multiple other players? Technoblade.

Technoblade also has every reason to be breeding villagers for special arrows and crossbows, because he's said on stream that he wants to try spamming multi-shot crossbows in combat to take out huge groups of enemies. He said at a later point that he had run into trouble with getting multiple crossbows with the enchantment multi-shot, and implied it wasn't going to happen. But has he ever been the kind of person to be stopped by something being challenging? Absolutely not.

Think of literally anything Techno has done - his Bedwars win streak, beating MC with a steering wheel, the Potato Wars - what I believe is really happening, is that Techno is lying about how equipped he is so that no matter what side he ends up fighting for, his enemies will have no true way of knowing how powerful he is.

3. Dream might be his secret ally (AKA The Glowstone Incident)

This brings us to a...confusing moment in Techno's stream that sparked a lot of questions. It pointed me towards 2 different, but not necessarily exclusive, theories.

The Glowstone Incident precedes as follows: Techno needs glowstone but can't find any in his chests, so he puts on his BRB screen. He says that he is "hacking" and asking Dream to use game mode to give him the glowstone. Typing can be heard, and then multiple chests are opened. Techno takes off the BRB screen and he now has three stacks of glowstone dust. This was absolutely bewildering to watch live, and was one of the most blatantly suspicious things he has done in front of his viewers. (You can find the exact clip on the thread I mentioned, it is...so weird)

Theory A: Though unlikely, Techno could be Dream's secret ally, and Dream really did use creative to give him the stacks. Or, he potentially gave Techno OP permissions so that he could get the glow stone (and any other materials he’d want) himself.

We all remember their meet up on that ocean hill, where Dream gives Techno golden apples, diamonds, and other such materials for the battle against Schlatt. It seemed to be a one-off gift that was more for Wilbur's benefit than Techno's, but there's potentially the chance that Dream saw an alliance to Techno to be more beneficial than working only with Wilbur, and contacted him off screen to make deals.

Going back to the Village Farm - for a player to get the exact enchantment they want for a reasonable price, breeding them is the most logical option. It's the route Techno would take regardless of Dream's rules on the SMP too, as he tends to show little regard for what the creators want (Ex. Taking over SMP Earth, exploiting Hypixel Skyblock, etc.) However, it could also be possible that Dream gave Techno permission to do this, and so the reason Techno is keeping the farm secret is so that the viewers don't know of their alliance.

Theory B: Techno has hidden resources in his base that he doesn't want anyone to have even the chance to see. Whether it is to hide from enemies watching (or to hide from Dream in particular because Techno knows he's breaking the server's rules) there are secret chests that Techno has with extra resources that can be heard loud and clear in the video.

They could be simple ones hidden in the walls...or in the blackstone brick base hidden under his floors. Saying he’s “hacking” rather than the reality of him just checking all his chests again is on par for Techno’s usual dramatics - yet we can clearly see that there’s no glowstone in any of his chests. This is why I believe he got the glowstone from some unseen resource. With the BRB screen on, Techno prevents his viewers from actually seeing how he got the 3 stacks of powder, and it keeps the location of his hidden materials safe.

Personally, I feel theory B is more likely, but there have been moments where Dream has acted Sus so...be on the lookout y'all.

4. Techno not participating in MCC

For those of you who watched Techno during the Potato War, many will remember that MCC 6 had a stressful undertone. Because of how much effort and time Techno had been putting into farming on Skyblock, taking a break to compete in another event was distracting. It ultimately led to him losing time that, from his perspective, would have been better off spent farming.

Techno might not be as blatantly grinding on the Dream SMP as he did with the Potato War, but it's undeniable that other streamers have seen him online for stretches of 10 hours and more. When asked about why he wasn't participating in the next MCC, Techno didn't say he was taking a break - something that'd be entirely reasonable and honestly well earned - he said "I don't want to."

It could be awkward phrasing by virtue of Techno's personality, but what I think is more likely is that Techno has learned from his past mistakes. Rather than "waste" time competing in MCC, Techno might be planning to use the time everyone on the SMP is gone to his advantage. He could sneak into enemy territory, set traps in certain areas, or maybe even perform some illegal acts that Dream would never allow. Either way, I suspect Techno has something planned for the 14th.

Honorable Mentions:

Dream poking fun, or blatantly covering for Techno?

This clip of Techno's secret Something??? next to the spider spawner, undeniably suspicious

Techno had around 5 stacks of wool in his inventory at one point - he absolutely could be bed mining the nether not only so that he has multiple sets of OP netherite, but possibly because he's preparing the gear for another person (cough cough Philza) or people

Techno's collection of ghast tears. He's studied Crystal PvP and made plenty of 2b2t references in the past (Look up FitMC for more info on those things) So it could be possible that Techno is hiding stacks of end crystals so that he can decimate multiple players in an instant

All in all, I'm 100% convinced that Techno has some serious plans hidden behind the scenes that he's not going to share until it's time for him to unleash utter chaos. We know he's keeping secrets, we know he's had the time, and we know he's capable.

I hope you all enjoyed my research and feel terrified of what Techno could possibly have done off camera :D

If anyone else has different theories, corrections to what I wrote, or other moments where Pink was Sus, feel free to comment!

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