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#cause i love knowing that people are recovering and getting better im very happy for all of you
kermitmentality · 7 months
Note
Hello, lovely stranger. I wanted to pop in here just to let you know how insanely proud I am of you. You don’t have to post this, but I just want you to know that I see you. I see the pain you’re in. And you are incredible for still fighting. I had an account like this when I was 13 and it was a catalyst for me still having an ED now at age 20. If you’re on the brink of deciding to leave this community or if you’re just joining, I cannot stress enough how much you should get out. But I know it’s not that easy. I know things are really scary right now. Take a moment to realize how amazing you are for still being here. You are so special, truly one of a kind. I promise one day you will wake up and your body will feel like home. You deserve better. You deserve comfort and love. You are not a burden and all hope is not lost. I know it’s hard to believe me, and that’s okay. You don’t have to believe me. Just keep hanging in there and striving for the day where you can believe me. It’s okay to not be strong, to just be sad. You have every right. You’ve been so strong for so long and I just want you to know that I see it. And I’m so so so proud of you. You are worth sticking around. You are worth fighting for. You contribute so much to this world and it won’t be the same without you. I don’t want to say it gets better because I know personally that that does nothing to help. So I just want to tell you that are worthy of life. You are worthy or self love. I see your pain; I see your struggle. I am sending you all of the love and well wishes from my 14 year old self who was in as much pain as your currently are. Things have gotten better for me, and they will for you, even if it doesn’t feel like it. You are not hopeless. You are not a lost cause. You are not inherently bad. You are not your body or your weight, no matter how much it feels like it. I’m rooting for you and I want you to keep fighting. I see how hard you’ve been working and I’m so proud of you. Hang in there for me. I promise it will work itself out even if it seems so dim. You are worth fighting for. The world is lucky to have you. Your body and your presence is a gift, no matter the size it comes in. You are okay. You are worthy. And I’m so beyond proud of you.
hello!! this is seriously so sweet and tysm, i really appreciate it. started tearing up hah
i’m really sorry you have had to go thru this for so long but i’m glad u can now use it to help people :) it’s very kind of u to send this
but yes, sadly i am a bit too far into my ed. i hope one day i will find the will to recover, but it is not today. i think it may come soon, but so many changes are happening in my life, which isn’t helping.
but there is a constant battle in my brain, one side saying what you said and another saying to continue. because of this battle, i think i will recover at some point in my life.
thank you again, i really appreciate this and it really does help with motivation and giving a reason to stop, which sometimes is difficult to think of
i hope u have an amazing day!! and im so proud of u for how far you have come and happy that u have begun your road to recovery!!! 🫶🫶
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nymphoheretic · 10 months
Note
Omg?! I’m sorry to hear what you’re having to go through right now 😭😭 I hope you’re able to get all of it sorted soon and the person is caught. God that is just freaking terrible, I really hate people sometimes. It’s one of the reasons I’m thankful I work with animals and don’t have to deal with the masses. I’ll show you some of our shelter animals and hope that they make your day a little brighter and better, even if just for a moment. 🧡
This is Parker, a little beagle pupper someone just dumped at the dog park next door and one of our clients saw and brought him to us
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This is Thomas O’Malley (his name was originally Naked because we just wanted to say “hey can you get Naked for me” because we have the humor of 12 year old boys at my job)
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Mr. Stefan, the absolute sweetest boy, I almost took him home but he found a good one so that makes me happy. He was at the shelter for almost a year cause he has chronic issues and everyone just kept passing him up
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Snuggles, she’s so freaking cute. Very sweet and adorable lil baby. Had to have a major surgery right after we got her, but you’d never know that seeing her now
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Princess (I’m pretty sure that’s her name??? I think it is lol) there’s like a whole group of cats in our cat room that came from one house and they all look the same and I can’t ever remember who is who 😭
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And then Miss May Belle, she’s our clinic cat. She doesn’t want you to mess with her unless you are feeding her treats 😌 we head canon she has a Russian accent and interpret what we think she’s saying when she screams at us
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OMG LOOK AT ALL THE BABIES!!!
I also work with animals at a vet clinic, mostly cause I, too, am very introverted and hate people irl. The friends I've made online are better than some of the people I've met in person.
BUT BACK TO THE BABIE!!
Parker is so stinking cute!! How could anyone just dump him and leave him. He's so precious like look at his liddol face!
Thomas "Naked" O'Malley. That it what I am dubbing him and you cannot change my mind. I absolutely adore orange tabbies!! They are my favorite kitties cause of their chaotic natures!! I used to have one growing up named "Pretty." (I was 5. Sue me)
Stefan is such a handsome young man and I'm so happy he got a loving home. Everyone always passes by on the black cats and that always makes me want to take home every black cat I see in a shelter.
Snuggles! I want to give her snuggles She looks so soft and cuddly!! Im so happy that she recovered so well from her surgery. She deserves all the kiss o a her little nose!
Pretty, pretty Princess! She looks like the sweetest kitty ever! She looks so curious and I can practically hear the curious likke "Mmrr" when you took that picture.
Miss May Belle looks like a grumpy old Russian Lady 🤣 Give her plenty of treats for me!
Thank you for showing them to me!
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babygirlgojo · 1 year
Note
Oh ew the OF accounts and sex bots are completely getting out of hand. I haven’t been notified of any new followers but I don’t trust tumblr to do so. I’m have to gonna check on that soon 🙄🙄.
And seriously for what reason are people flagging down your works for like 😭😭?? It literally makes no sense??? Some people are so rude and mean and spiteful for no reason like. Do better or screw off unintentionally quoting Ego here I’m sorry that this happened to you, it really sucks.
Ever since break started I’ve been in a kind of limbo. It feels so surreal not having any work to do. I mean I do have basic chores to do today like the laundry and vacuuming and stuff but besides that it’s a free day. I am. Very very very. Temped to start reading the blue lock manga. I know I said I’d wait for the anime to finish but like I need something to do 😭😭. I was starting my first TR reread since the last chapter but I only got in 3 chapters before I started sobbing and I haven’t even gotten to Akkuns first death or met Mikey and Draken for the first time again yet. I’m gonna have to chunk my way through it while sobbing and taking so many breaks because I will seriously never recover from this manga. OH AND I LOVE CHIFUYUS BIRTHDAY ART. Wakui continuing to attest that yes takefuyu are still canon in the reset timeline. It’s such a relief for me because those two are my comfort duo 😭😭😭. I also want to finish Chainsaw Man soon. I stopped at around volume 9 because I’m broke and was reading it at the bookstore and all I can say is that this series is definitely getting a reread cause I love analyzing strange works and concepts. THE MAITAKE COVER ASJKGFJKHFFGGG. The way I screeched when I first saw it like. I love how you worded it, they literally look like royalty together UGH. Suffice to say that yes maitake fans has a field day with the cover of volume 31 😌😌. I cant wait for the inside cover to be revealed. My prediction/demand is that it’s gonna be then as children childhood-friends-to-lovers. But I guess we’ll see.
Anyways. How are you Belle? Doing better I hope? How’s uni? Oh and when does your winter break start? How’s life? Im so happy tumblr is being cooperative now and letting you see my tagged posts 😭😭. Sorry for the constant tagging tho, there’s just so much I wanna share and I see something and I’m like “oh I wanna show this to Belle” you know? Oh and im so glad you liked that Oliver drabble 🥹🥹. I’ve got another one in mind for him but this time it might be a little more ✨spicy✨ so stay tuned 👀👀😌. I hope you have a great day and that the caramel frappuccino tasted great!!! *sending many virtual hugs*
- ✨ anon
Istg- i got followed by accounts from Czechia and Carolina this morning. Alright, I made my pinned post of Gojo's OF account but this is a writing blog; not even an OF promotion blog (╥﹏╥) unless... i draw some stuff
Tumblr decided to not let me post my rant- so here’s what I had to say
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I revisited my childhood with watching DBZ... (i knew i said i would start one piece but the gym bro-ness got the better of me and i started watching it) someone please explain why does Goku's voice sound... i don't know how to describe it. i was so shocked about his voice, i was planning on watching the dub instead cause of it *crying* Honestly, Wakui did a really good job with the cover. Even when I was reading mangas online - I was so awed by the covers of the manga and when TR was on its peak here, i saw a lot of spoilers for bonten mikey. I never liked mikey... but this made me change my mind. And they (like every cover character i saw up until the Brahman arc looked like royalty. Even hanma-) I'm doing well! Contemplating to change the blog theme for some reason. It's not gonna be aiku ofc- he gets 0 screen time cause he hasn't come back from italy and i am mad at him with part 1 to ocean hues I'm on my winter break actually and omw back home. Fifa knocked the wind out of me. I feel sad cause Mbappé played really well (and he was sad too when they lost), i literally went to go keep my plate and he scored in 97 seconds of the first goal T.T . But i'm also really happy for Argentina cause its the first time in 36 years since Maradona that they have won the Wc and i cried cause they were crying on the field not to mention the fact that Messi played in their team as well - so it was bittersweet ending but also very well deserved! And yes i am a football head I can't see you in my activity still (maybe your visibility switch is off? i'm not sure) but i do get the number on my activity and that's how ik that you're there (⑅ •͈ᴗ•͈ ) I actually don't mind being tagged! and I enjoy the things you have to show me as well ૮⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝ ა (i saw some stuff where you tagged me- i'll be answering those soon, promise i'm not ignoring you ૮(˶˃ᆺ˂˶)ა ) I. absolutely. loved. the Oliver drabble ˃̵ᴗ˂̵. I still read it btw, cause it is absolutely precious. the deer headrest and the fact he wants to be a good boy made me go (๑✪ᆺ✪๑) did you say spicy 💀 *here lies Isabelle Aiku; beloved wife of Oliver Aiku who is unaware that he is married to her- * Starry you're gonna make me combust from the heat *sending back bear hugs*
*my man is so handsome (>﹏<) and yours is too*
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hobidreams · 2 years
Note
Raaaaaiiin!!
How are you feeling? How was the procedure? I hope every went well and that you're recovering just fine and better!! Big hug until you're feeling okay!! 💟💟
From one proposal (may I say: advance congratulations!!aheheh omg can't wait for you guys i mean no pressure but omg!! Happy for you huhu! 🥳💕🎉) to these 3 couples'. LET'S TALK ABOUT THE FINALE & THESE PEOPLE👀👀😆
OMGG ahahahaha that Arthur photoooo i thought it was fanmade! IT WAS REAL? He does look like Wataru 😆😆
Yes hahaha at that point i was used to his goatee too 😆
Loool also i mean, well if people are entertained...why not i guess 😆 My sister watches the US one (idk why she doesn't watch the Japan one but she said she glimpse every now and then bc her husband watched the Japan version too haha) and she really did say it's hot trash and yes she likes watching these reality shows 😂
No worries!! I really hope you're taking all your time to heal and take the time to focus & take care of yourself! ❤ It's good to hear you're feeling better! Continue to take time for yourself until you feel fully strong!
Use this ask to post, to avoid spoilers? Thanks hehe
I wanna know your intial reactionsss and thouughtsss-- What do you think about the finale?? I want to know what you got to say 'cause we HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS-- SPILL 'EM DEETS, SIS 👀👀😆 LET'S TALK ABOUT IT
-🧇
HI BABY im so sorry for the delay in answering this!!!! i just havent had the time to sit down and really type and YOU DESERVE A PROPER ANSWER 💕💕💕 the procedure was super small hahaha that word makes it sound more serious than it was but im mostly(?) okay??? maybe???? i thought the side effects had faded but then they just kind of came back recently so idk. it’s why i haven’t been online as much nor been at my computer AT ALL. which is why i couldnt type up my response to this and have been trying to add a bit every day :(((( thank you so so so much for your patience; ur the best 💞
the rest of your asks are under the cut so to all non waffle anon people, PLEASE AVOID IF U DONT WANT LIB JP SPOILERS 💖
Raiiin!! 💟
Omggg that's so cute 🥺🥺 it's actually very practical?? I LOVE that YOU CAN PICK OUT THE RING YOU WANT💖💖-- i think that should be done more often! 😂
YES exactly omg, i think doing this would avoid all the issues of having to pretend like you like the style or smth when its really not ur tastes. some ppl think it spoils the surprise but as someone who is very picky, i dont agree 🤣 we picked out the ring we wanted! just waiting on the people to give us a quote and then we’ll hopefully start getting it made!!! 💖
Awwwwh, gosh that's so sweet 🥺 now you get to look forward to that time of your life!! Ooh such a happy feeling 🥺 I could just imagine what you're younger self would look like, so cute! and with the right person, person you love awwwh!! 🥺💖 ugh you guys make me want to fall in love!!! 😂💕
Looking forward to hearing the story!!👀💕
I'M SO EXCITED FOR YOU TO BE SUPRISED by whatever he plans!! I'm sure it'll be wonderful!! 💟💟💟
YOU SHOULD FALL IN LOVE AND THEN COME TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT 💕 i will be waiting heheehe. 
Alright let's talk about things!
With the Terrace House--EXACTLY!! 💯
I think that's all we need, really!!
Seriously, if Love is Blind or any reality show really-- have this type of format, with various hosts watching & reacting at the real time with us (viewers)--I'd watch it. Haha. They have to be real and funny haha
It really helps that the hosts are genuine as they are and with their reactions too! They're funny too haha. Which i think makes the show more effective.
Ugh yes! Could you imagine seeing a host reaction with a LIB scene? It'll be soo funny because it's so relatable! 😆
Oh tell me about it!! Everything's better when you watch it with a friend!! I love love that!! 🥺💕 esp when you get to be as blunt and say whatever you want to cause you're with a friend and you're so comfortable with them. You can just laugh and cry and shout at the tv/show together--it's always a good time!! 👌💟 haha. Aww me too! You can chat with anything to me/us about things!! 😂💟💟
i think esp with a show that has such a diff culture but is translated for an english-speaking audience, i think it would've been awesome to have a cultural guide of sorts? or at least some translator's notes LOL i love fan translations of anime for that exact reason. i really want to know more about what kind of conventions are happening in JP that might change the reactions of the contestants.
I did send 1 ask before! Sorry about that huhu. I'm gonna send the follow-ups-- I wasn't able to bc life got in the way haha ahuhu but I will send it a few minutes after this!! And it's okay, you have nothing to apologize! I actually excited that i actually type all things on my note app so it'll be ready to send haha. So WE WILL DEF TALK ABOUT IT yes gurl we will. 👀😂 Haha.
Sorry for the hold-up and thank you for waiting for me 🥺 will send the asks in a few!
Also, congrats again?? We'll look forward hearing the proposal story, soo excited for you omgggg!!! 💟💟🎉
-🧇
NO WORRIES i was just worried they got eaten up by tumblr!!! but i got them safely 💞
Alright, let's talk about the show 👀👀😆 buckle up bc this is gonna be looooonger 😅😂 hope you don't mind.
Sorry, It took me time to send this ask-- life kind of got in the way 😥😅 but let's talk now! I CAN'T WAIT TO READ YOUR THOUGHTS, REACTIONS (no matter how long) cause I WANNA KNOW THEEEEMM omggg!! SPILL 'EM, SIS LET IT ALL OUT hahaha 👀👀😆💕
I recapped the ep 10 & 11 for refresher on what happened haha. I almost forgot some details haha:
Ep 10:
• Ryotaro meeting Motomi's father/family
It went well?? I was suprised! I kind of understand where her dad's coming from. Besides being strict/traditional person (I also can relate bc you know, asian parents haha)-- i figured maybe he's strict bc he's protective of Motomi since she got married before and all? Anyway, it's a good thing we get to know them and their side.
I feel so happy & relieved for Ryotaro (and Motomi) in this aww. Good job, well done good boi Ryotaro! I'm so happy for them huhu 🥺💕
Her dad approving of Ryotaro!! And also the dad is so cute when he was making small talks, like with men & their hair? Hahaha that was such a sweet moment.
Also I really liked what Motomi's mom said about complementing each other and making the other cry--that its okay to cry bc various things will happen and that it's important to support each other. I thought that's such a simple, realistic advice for love. Idk that's just a sweet thing to say, for me. Wbu?
I DIED WITH THESE PARENTS. theyre SOOOO supportive (or at least the mom was right off the bat) and i was a little afraid bc the sister looked kind of upset or unhappy but then i was glad to see she warmed up by the end of the lunch. the dad was less traditional than i thought, but also omg SO direct. i was scared hahaha. but i understand why he would be afraid of the ‘punk’ vibe that Ryotaro had before, with the cultural stigma and all, but im glad he changed his mind once he saw how happy Ryotaro made Motomi 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 surprisingly progressive for how traditional they were hyping him up to be haha maybe for the drama. 
• Wataru & Midori work out scene
Gurl, i was taken aback when Midori mentioned he lost like 6 /7 kilos. Idk why that put me off hahaha. Because of the past ep when there'san impression that Wataru sort of struggled a bit at that workout. I've always thought that I hope Wataru enthustiactically agreed/was willing to join her in working out, haha. But also, I'm not sure cause maybe it's the translations so I may not fully got what's being said cause I don't know Japanese. Am i the only one? Pls tell me, i'm genuinely asking bc I might just took some things differently haha. There's def nothing wrong with encouraging a partner to workout together for the intention of being better health-wise or overall as a person, totally get it and its normal. And I'm also not saying Midori is a bad person, not at all. I just hope Wataru likes it and he's not pressured/forced into doing it. Which is not right? Also seems like Midori is respecting him with boundaries so that's good. It looks like they're enjoying it anyway so haha, also the way they talk to each other is so natural haha. 😆
What do you think about this? Or am i just overthinking things? Haha 😂👀
OMG i was SO confused. like wasn’t it just a few weeks? 6/7 KILOS ???? even if that was pounds id be like bruh thats a lot but KILOS? nah there’s no what that was done in a healthy way 😅😅😅 so i dont really agree with that extreme dieting. but she also said in one of her q&a videos on youtube that everyone lost weight during the show bc of the stresses of being on camera all the time and making decisions etc. so it could be that? idk if that 6/7 kilos is overall since the start of the show or just in those few weeks. if its the latter then .. oof. 
i totally see where you’re coming from!!! i also kind of have the mindset that working out or being active isn’t just something we should do because we enjoy it. i consider it like brushing my teeth, you know? i don’t loooove doing it but i do it bc it’s good for my health. and i dont think Midori is pressuring him into something thats super intense? and Wataru seems to agree that he could be more active in his life so i hope that they’re just pushing each other to be their best selves. im also pushing my bf to do yoga and walks with me to improve his health bc hes always complaining about being sore but sits on his ass for most hours of the day lmaoooo
• Shuntaro & Ayano went to the arcade
I felt like nothing really got resolved haha. I feel like there are things unsaid but maybe the show didn't included it. I also thought at that point, i can see they're def not ready to get married to each other haha. I genuinely think they don't know each other a lot yet enough to spend their life together. What do you think?
Do you think Shuntaro kept her art?👀 haha jk i think he did because seems like a nice & mature person haha but idk haha.
THESE TWO ARE A MESS LMAO. seriously, i would be fed up with Ayano’s communication style WEEKS ago lmao.... more on my thoughts w this couple in the next section tho
• Kaoru & Misaki talking (things like about what he said about her trauma/dad)
I was just so baffled how so casual & unaware by almost anything about what he' saying or in their relationship 😂 oh we just know that Kaoru was planning on how to say to him there will be no wedding and how to break-up haha. I kept thinking like, are they really still considering (esp Misaki) getting married?? I'm too harsh im sorry but like? Is it just me? Haha 😅
LITERALLY how is he still functioning irl when hes this clueless lmao. the shit he said about her father and how she should just “move on” like ????? NO???? shes sharing her trauma with u like... anyway im glad they broke up LMAO i dont like Kaoru that much but she deserves better
• Motomi meeting Ryotaro's parents!!
They're so cuuute!! They're so funny esp his dad! Haha! Also, at first the dad looks strict-- i kinda thought that he should've "switched looks" with Motomi's dad as Ryotaro's dad looks a bit strict but is really warm and Motomi's dad looks warm but is strict. Idk haha does that make sense? Haha Anyway
They're so easy to talk to and so sweet. That moment when he's told their love story 😆🥺😆 this is just such a sweet moment and i think Motomi fit just right with them. This is just all over such a funny, feel good and sweet moment ❤ it's so refreshing to watch hahaha
OMG I LOOOOOOVE RYOTARO’S PARENTS hahaahah they were so so welcoming and so adorable. i think they could really tell just how head over heels their son was 😭😭 we love supportive families. i was smiling the whole time with how cute they all were to each other 😭💖
• Ayano Shuntaro going to his home
Shuntaro's family is so rich and elegant?? Hahaha that garden?? I thought it was like they went into a private/national park 😆 that cave?? When he said he used to just climb and play around there like, what?? That's so cool?? And That house, with a forrest BESIDE the house?? So fancy??? Hahaha. I thought they're gonna meet Shuntaro's parents? Also i wondered how their conversation went with Shuntaro's brother 👀👀 haha
holy shit yeah, Shuntaro is RICH rich lol!!! i couldn’t rly tell before i saw the house but damnnnn. his house is a tourist destination i believe! someone on reddit found the website. a lot of ppl on reddit were saying Ayano was gold digging after that scene but meh i dont rly agree. i think she has her own money (at least seeing her wardrobe lmao) but anyway i can see how he has that ~wealthy~ vibe haha
• Bachelor/bachelorette party:
What do think about this?
I don't think there's much to talk about the guys' party haha (Ryotaro's so sweet what he said about Motomi when he was doing darts)
LMAO MISAKI’S SELF INSULTS. that was the best part for me hahaha i was like, at least hes self aware. also im glad the guys got to be friends lmao at least something good came out of it. i’ll talk more about their dynamics in the final ep discussion hahaah
The girls' party
It's soo good to see all of them again! I'm so happy to see Priya and Nana too hahaha. When the girls took turns telling how things are going with each of their relationships--
- Kaoru looks so vulnerable and serious at the time.
this is where i like Kaoru the most tbh hahaah with the girls. 
- Midori-- god this girl. Hahaa. The things she really has to say is "Wataru lost weight", im like gurl really? Hahaha! Nothing serious but just an interesting thing to say first hahaha just i think she's also just trying to lighten things up. It's good that she's actually honest (and consistent too haha) about her feelings, I appreciate that, at least.
yeah i really appreciate her dynamic with the other girls tbh! i feel like she really brings up the mood for everyone, you know? like a lot of ppl feel more reserved but shes ~open~ and plays off Priya really well!! maybe becaues theyve both lived abroad?
• Kaoru Misaki break-up
Is it just me or did Misaki looked like he genuinely suprised/sad about their break-up?? Like he's really not aware about things not going well with them? Haha. Well, we've seen this coming. I don't think Kaoru is upset/sad at all haha, she looked like she's expecting it anyway.
omg yes this was so weird to me LMAO. he was so sad but its like dude why didnt u do better. pls. i was so done with his shit at this point that i was like “ok whatever” HAHAHA not even phazed. i think she knew she wasnt gonna marry this guy from early on, and prob just wanted more air time 🤣
• Midori & Wataru talks about the wedding
Omgg what do you think? This is such a click-baity drama haha. Made me think that, "maybe Midori just isn't into marriage, in general?" since she's been so independent since but idk haha. What do you think?
omgggg yeah i feel like the editing was crafty here. someone (I CANT RMB WHO IT WAS!! i think it was Midori or it might have been Minami actually) said in an instagram post that a lot of stuff was taken out of context or edited out to make things seem more intense. so i feel like i wanna give Midori the benefit of the doubt? i do agree that she kinda has that ‘lived abroad before’ feeling of being more independant hahaha
• Ryotaro fixing Motomi's hair moment again huhu so cute haha
UGH I DIED HERE OMG i would love this kinda domestic moment!!!
• After watching the final ep--looking back at this Ayano-Shuntaro preview interview before the wedding--It's interesting, huh??? 👀👀 knowing what happened and what Ayano said. Hahaha. What do you think? 👀😂
this was totally bait HAHAHA i was so shocked to see her in the wedding dress. i was like NOOOOO WAYYYYYYY IT’S GONNA BE DISASTER!
Ep 11, Finale:
• Ayano-Shuntaro
Umm, OH MY GOD? 👀👀
I can say i wasn't suprised they didn't end up getting married but..the way they ended things?? It's interesting 👀 ahaha!
Surprised they made it to the actual wedding day! 😆
Did Shuntaro have planned that before the wedding or could he have changed his mind just at that day or last minute??oh my god? Haha i mean, good to know because he seems so mature with what he decided.
omggggg okay i feel like he couldnt go thru with it last minute. like i feel like he was still unsure up to it but then once he got there and changed he was like ... nah LOL. 
I also felt Ayano being nervous but weirdly like sure? It seems like she's made up her mind. She looks a bit suprised when Shuntaro walked in?? Did she expect she's the one to end things but never expect for Shuntaro to end it??omg haha
I predicted she's gonna reject him anyway 😆 but when and what moment?? Omg idk! Was she planning to say no at the altar?? Whaat?? Do you see her saying yes, at all? How about you, what do you think?? 👀👀 the dramaaa!😆
i actually wasnt surprised that the couples broke up before getting to the altar. i feel like that was definitely more emphasized in the US version. but someone on reddit speculated that it would be super rude to get all your family and friends there just for there to be no wedding LMAO WHICH IS TRUE!!!! 
so i honestly think she was gonna go through with it and maybe break up after???? or at least play it cool in front of the cameras???? idk but she DEFINITELY seemed surprised by Shuntaro’s apeparance.
Also, she seemed relieved about it (and maybe Shuntaro was the one who ended it? 👀 Haha) and as he said, Shuntaro was a bit
They really have to get their suit and wedding dress on (I meaan, better than being rejected right at the altar right?) just before that confrontation 😆 THE DRAMA hahaha
I mean, at least they get to wear fancy clothes and they look nice when they ended things 😆
I kind of felt bad for Shuntaro in the end aw. Did he said he expected to at least Ayano resisted or ask him to talk more? But instead, she let go so fast haha. Aw man. Hope he finds good match for him.
AFDSLJKASDF OK PPL WERE TOTALLY DEBATING OVER THIS MOMENT ON REDDIT and im still undecided as to which side im on!!!! some ppl were like “oh hes so immature. like he wanted her to beg for him” but then other ppl were saying that “he’s just upset.” i feel like im leaning towards the latter side and being more empathetic with him??? like YOU SPENT ALL THIS TIME TOGETHER!! of COURSE he would’ve expected her to be a little more sad about it. that seems natural!!! he was obviously sad that it didn’t work out. but instead she was like lol bye. honestly that whole conversation was a MESS. 
And Ayano telling her friends the wedding is cancelled omgg loool haha. So awkward for them??haha.
I think its for the better for both parties, right? Age gap def was a factor (not that it's a bad thing cause sometimes people still work, sometimes they don't). Ayano didn't seem to totally in love with Shuntaro. Shuntaro seemed like he would like to get to know Ayano much more but always felt she's a bit closed off and that they're relationship didn't get deeper? I'm not sure. What are your thoughts?
What do you think of these two and the whole drama?? 👀👀 haha!
a lot of ppl were really bashing on Shuntaro online for the whole “she left me for two days thing,” which seemed to color his whole perception of her for the rest of their time living together. i can’t really make a definitive judgement without knowing the whole story, but she did admit that all she told him was ‘i have to take care of my dog.’ i can understand how he got that impression from her, that she was trying to escape him from the beginning. if she had explained at the dog had an illness, he would’ve been like “oh okay that makes sense.” so it just seems really frustrating to communicate with her. and so that rift between them just kept growing and growing.
anyway im glad they didnt get married HAHA. i think they really just werent suited for each other and i hope they can find others. i wasn’t rly happy with her when she was being weirded out by his taking photos (it’s his hobby!!!! ugh like nanako and the potatoes all over again) but he also could’ve tried to communicate his feelings better from the beginning. UGH. hahah
• Motomi-Ryotaro
OMG IM SO HAPPY FOR THEM, OF COURSE THEY WOULD BE THE END GAME!! 🥺🥺💖 hahaha
Same location with Ayano-Shuntaro?? Why?? Do you think it was supposed to be the same?or we just didn't got the chance to see Ayano/Shuntaro's?
Motomi gets to wear her first wedding dress!! 🥺 she looks so lovely!! She deserve it and deserve to feel beautiful on her day! (I hope they get to have a real real in life wedding ceremony tho!) 💕 her mom is so funny pls, when she asked Motomi if she brushed her teeth, like yes mom of course 😂 and the "not so bad, in the right clothes", so cute hahaha! Motomi with her family's dynamic is so cute and nice. Haha
💯💯💯💯💯 YES AGREEEEE i was grinning so hard when they came on!!!
Her dad is there and he's smiling!! That's wonderful, thank god!! 😂 and he gets to walk her down the aisle 🥺
Cute moment with Ryotaro & his parents too haha, he looks such a good boi in all white suit haha. Also, When Ryotaro said, "there's no way she's a no-show right?" 😩🥺 like dude, she likes you a lot, trust!! Haha
I wasn't familiar with how the contestant were introduce so the revealing of whether or not the groom/bride is present at the wedding through behind the curtain is kind of nerve wracking! Haha but oh thank god haha.
I WAS SO CONFUSED AT FIRST i was like why is there english?? but evidently western-style weddings are quite popular in Japan rn? so you can find work easily as a white person doing weddings LMAO. 
I mean, this is just what we expect, right?This is perfect 💕 This is just what we want to see always, two people who like and love each other. They're just so right for each other and flow so naturally and so easy. I love that both families are there and friends too.
Ryotaro's vow is short and sweet. Motomi, my god-- SHE GOT US THERE. The PAUS IS SO INTENSE AND LONG?? SHE DID TOOK HER TIME Hahaha! I stopped breathing for a minute! like gurl don't scare us like that! 😆 oh, she knows how to do suspense and how to do drama for a show hahaha! which i just realized, reminiscent of her reply to Ryotaro's proposal in the pod!! When i thought she'd say no but really just listed off things about her and will Ryotaro take her then she also asked if he wants to marry her 🥺 istg-- these two are like fanfic troupe couple but realistic and real people 😆
im absolutely certain they edited the pause to be way longer than it was HAHAHA but omg yes it was so so so sweet 😭😭😭 like i was so scared they wouldnt make it at first when she saw his hair but THE WAY THEY OVERCAME IT ALL TO BE HAPPY AHHHHHHHHH
Its so funny and cute when Ryotaro was nervous whether she'd say yes, like of course dude she will!! Aw 🥺 haha
okay but like i get it hahaha. some things are scary even when u know what the answer will be 🤣 my bf says he’s nervous about (eventually) proposing even tho im gonna say yes. but omg so cute how much Ryotaro fretted!!!
They are like the epitome of (idk but from what I saw haha) "love is easier when its with the right person", like awww. They make me want to fall in love too 😂
yesss omg relationships take work but the love between y’all should always just flow smoothly and well. i see too many things online where ppl are fighting all the time but still wanting to be together. like noooo, it should be like 95% easy and good haha. 
Overall this is just so cute and so sweet and happy-- we expected it and i was just so happy watching them. Makes me think its sooo insane and fascinating that couples really do find love and get married for real with these kind of shows!! 😂💕
I stalked their IGs (I'm sure/i think you did too? 👀😂) and Motomi posted!!! They got married on Jan. 11 this year huhu!!! So happy for them also that they got to have a real, non show, legit wedding ceremony!! ugh so happy for them 🥺💖
What do you think about these two? 👀
you said it all my friend!!! Motomi’s pics were soooo cute and i love how everyone latched onto Pupu LMAO i rly love all the pupu + Ryotaro pics hahaha. overall i just felt so satisfied watching these two fall for each other and they were definitely the best couple of the show. 
• Midori-Wataru
👀👀👀 think this THE couple we've been waiting for!!! This is what the people watch the show for, the suspense and the drama!! 😆
I felt like I held my breath from the moment they entered the place-- well, specifically, by just watching Midori get ready up to them in the altar together. Like,MY GOD THIS IS SO INTENSE 😂😂 they really did save them for last hahaha
I thought it would end up badly but then, if they're the last couple-- it is supposed to be happy ending? Really, i'm just so confused with Midori up to the very last minute as much as how she looks so confused/hesistant in this show 😆
i mean OFC hahaah gotta end with a bang!! but omg yes i was honestly kinda afraid she would leave him at the altar... like holy shit i didnt wanna watch that happen 🤣 so im glad it didnt
Quite impressed that Wataru has a lot of faith with Midori's answer huh. Wow, that's the kind of person you want! Haha or sort of have a lot of trust with whatever Midori decides on, is it? What do you think?
it made me wonder what kind of conversations they had off camera!!! 👀 bc like all we saw was her hesitation and asking him like “what would you do if i said no” right?? maybe Wataru was certain that he’s a catch 🤣🤣 im certain he knew something we didnt!!
With Midori's confessionals, really did make me think that maybe marriage isn't a big thing to her (at least not yet). Maybe she's just not that type of person who's into marriage so much. So maybe that's what makes her hesistant. Idk. What do you think?
that’s a fair assessment tbh. i feel like she was gonna be ok whether or not she ended up marrying someone in the end. like it wasnt the end all be all goal. having a good match seemed to be the most important! i admire that :’)))) 
I think it's good that she's thinking about things cause you do have to be sure about who you're going to marry (so sometimes doubts can be good too? Makes you think, whether or not you/the other person is the one you're unsure of). She seems like the type of person to make completely sure she makes the right decision esp since her life is on it too! Haha. So i get the parents saying they trust her with what she decided.
The place is different and I think, prettier than the other 2? Why is that? Haha. But then the earlier is an open air and it felt lighter so haha. Anyways
I AGREE it’s definitely prettier because there was just too much grass outside i think LOL but i read that the couples got to choose where they got married :) idk if i’ll have a church wedding but it’s definitely a gorgeous location!! what do you want? i dont rly want an outdoor one either tho LMAOOOO im allergic to grass and pollen 🤣🤣
Mori and Misaki as their guests looool hahaha 😂 so cute. Bros with Wataru for sure haha. I wish we could've seen other contestants with Ryotaro-Motomi's wedding too! But that probably happened that their real-real wedding huh? Haha
pls i was so happy when i saw Mori LOL i was like BROOOOOO
JEEZUS Midori's answer to "how you felt when you saw each other"-- she was like, "i can't find the right words but I'm so happy you've come this far with me" like whaaaaat duality, SUSPENSE MUCH OMG 😆😆 ITS SO INTENSE HAHAHA i can't-- stg i was covering my eyes at the moment bracing whatever 😆
In fairness to Wataru, he didn't looked nervous, THE TRUST! 😆 well im glad they have that kind of trust
THE PAUSE IS MUCH MORE INTENSE with this one hahaha. Midori finally said yes! I am surprised and felt soo relieved!! Ahaha! Were you surprised? What was your reaction??👀👀😂
OKAYYYYY I WAS SO HAPPY HAHAHA. i was like 80% sure she would marry him bc damn you’re already up there 🤣 and with the encouragement of her mom like... she knew she had a good man who was willing to do a lot for her. but that 20% had me worried hahaha. i think i would understand if ultimately she was like ‘im just not attracted to him’ which is important, but it’s not the most important thing for me. and i think her mom helped her see that in the end.
I really hope none's feelings were forced tho haha of anyone.
And plus they really do seem so good and natural together!! It's just sometimes what Midori says contradicts with what we see on her reactions when she's with Wataru, which is I think she likes him a lot too!
SERIOUSLY they were always touching each other!! i was like GIRL WDYM YOU DONT LIKE HIM LMAO. 
Like, THANK GOD THIS TWO WORKED OUT THINGS together (THANK GOD, MIDORI! I reallly hope she's suuuure!! 😆 CONGRATS hahahaha)!! They both said yes! 😆😆💕 So happy for them too! (I'm just biased with Ryotaro-Motomi 😆 ahehe)
And aw, they did the thing when they first saw each other which was Wataru picking up Midori and kissed her aww!
Midori also posted on IG!! Aww good fkr them, finally!! 😆💕
What do you think with these two???👀👀 the most awaited couple hahaha!
(Will continue this for additional thoughts on the wrap up of the show haha)
TELL ME all your thoughts-- CAN'T WAIT TK HEAR THEM! 💟
-🧇
ALLLLL THE LUPIN PICS!!!! im so happy to see Wataru and Lupin together and that theyre all so happy 😭💕 im really glad they ended up together. esp with all her insta lives, they seem really good and solid :’)))))))))) all the drama can finally end hahah
The wedding montages are so cute!
• Idk if you noticed but have you seen Motomi's dad throwing flower petals for the newly wed couple?? So cute 😩😆
yes i was obsessed with this. Motomi’s dad is so cute despite all the scariness she initially said hahaha
• The cake eating loool haha cute and classic haha
• omggg Ryotaro & Motomi introducing each other as husband and wife 😭🥺 i caaaaan't! My heart huhu 🥺😭💕😆 so cuuuuuuute! It felt sooo real omg hahaha
• Wataru and Midori classic throwing back jokes to each other hahaha. I CAN'T WITH MIDORI when she said "make me sign in my sleep" about making it official like GURL! 😆 i can't believe how ballsy and blunt she is to make jokes like that ahahaha
im a SUCKER for that first intro as officially married partners ALWAYS. 
yess omg Wataru is such a jokester but Midori matches his energy so well!!!
Interview with the hosts:
• Each couple looked so styliiiish!! Love itt! 💕
• Look at that Midori with her boots, so pretty, i really like her style too haha
• RYOTARO & MOTOMI COLORED HAIR COUPLE!!!!! Her hair fits her sooo well, so pretty! Finally Blonde Ryotaro's back (not that i didn't like him with black hair)! Most prob Ryotaro did her hair too!!! 😭🥺💕 I CAN'T WITH THEM-- TOO ADORABLE!!!
• Overall, Ryotaro and Motomi are just ADORABLE AND ENDEARING uggh 😭🥺 thank god they found each other😩💟💟
AHHHHH I SCREAMED WHEN I SAW HER HAIR!!!! IT LOOKS SO GOOD ON HER and the greater metaphor of it all like IM SQUEALING. TRULY THE PERFECT CIRCLE TO COMPLETE THEIR STORY 😭😭😭😭😭 i really did like Ryotaro’s black hair more than the blonde (mayb because during the show his roots had grown out so it reminded me too much of Backstreet Boys’ frosted tips HAHA) but he goos good either way 😎😎
• Midori and Wataru didn't really changed cause I think that's how they've always been which is sooo good. It seem like Midori chose her words a bit careful now haha. Its good to hear her POV about her decision of saying yes haha. Having reservations up to the day before your wedding day? Oh my god that was so close 😂 thank god for the two of them! Hahaha
• So maybe it's marriage, in general-- that Midori's really skeptic about haha. Which I now totally get why haha.
yesss i think she grew a lot through the process and Wataru has made her more mature. he’s like 8 years older than her right? but i always felt like he was pretty “wise.” though tbh when he was with Priya, i kinda found him too show-offy and didn’t like him for a while hahaha but anyway i think they’re really making each other grow. 
I also think the hosts did a fairly good job asking them qs and being funny haha. I wish they could've been in the show more or interact with the contestant or smth, even just reacting/commentary cause i think they can pull that off pretty well (sort of like Terrace House-esque commentators haha) but anyways haha. Maybe its the show's format which im not familiar of haha.
What do you think about the interview? 👀
the interview as a whole was sooooo cute! seriously it made me miss the hosts so much bc their sense of humor was A+. i feel like the hosts were there more in LIB USA season 1 ... or maybe im just remembering wrong. anyway, i would totally watch a director’s cut with the hosts talking about the entire show LOL! 
it was a really nice touch to do the interview with the couples and to see them be happy. i always love it when a manga series does like “where are they ten years later” thing so i LOVED this even tho it wasnt nearly that long of a time haha. but it was good to have something that was free of drama, you know?
The whole "What/how are they doing now"-- with the former contestants is just a bit awkward? Only because you just remember how were they when they were with their partners before, you know? (Looking at Mori and Minami 👀 really wish both of them well 😩 huhu). Is this segment really a part of the show's format or only Japan have this?
ummmm i can’t remember! but i feel like it’s not uncommon in reality shows to do it? 🤔 im kinda glad they did tho. i think it made some people seem more likeable, like we were seeing them out of their element and in times of stress so maybe they weren’t totally themselves.
They didn't interview Nana 😥she was with Minami!! (Or maybe she refused? Huhu)
ACTUALLY interestingly enough, Minami is apparently REALLY good friends with Mizuki and Misaki! it was on her instagram q&a, when someone asked her who she’s closest w from the show. i thought it’d be some of the women but nope! i didnt see them hitting it off as friends whatsoever haha their personalities seem pretty different 🤣 
Misaki involved with the UN? Alright werk!
OK WHERE WAS THIS MISAKI WHEN KAORU NEEDED A PARTNER HAHAHA i was happy to see that he’s at least functional on his own and pretty damn good at his job but why is he so forgetful off the clock??? 🤣
Also, good for Priya and Mizuki! They're both doing pretty well esp in career?? Haha (saw Priya's IG story the other day that she's with Kaoru and i think they're at Misuki's store, supporting his business!)
yes omg the pudding LOL I hope Mizuki thought things through this time and that his shop succeeds lmao. but i bet it got a lot of press from the LIB release so maybe that’ll help. they must’ve ended things on pretty good terms tho, if she’s helping out?? that surprised me bc it felt more dramatic than that. or maybe theyre able to be friends bc romance is completely off the table now.
Look at Shuntaro just enjoy life! Good for him! Haha
Shuntaro x male contestants is the best ending 🤣🤣🤣 yeah i thought it was interesting of them to throw in such an older contestant, when the median age of the women was like 35. it’s such a huge gap!
Ryotaro & Motomi being domestic by eating lunch together and picking up rings!!! Midori & Wataru as well!! Awwwh 💖💖 I love that the show ended with them trying out the rings! 💕
YES I KNOW 😭😭😭 i was also rly interested in the fact that it seems common to have smaller rings in Japan? i ended up doing some research about it and it seems that a small, practical stone is popular whereas here in western society, it’s all about the bling lmao. i like JP’s way of doing it way better. i feel like there is too much pressure here around weddings. at least in terms of needing a huuuuuge bash with a huge ring to properly prove your love to each other or some bs. ive heard of ppl going into debt for a wedding too, which i think is crazy asfkljadfs SORRY THAT WAS SUCH A TANGENT LMAO i just feel strongly about this 🤣
I really like this Love is Blind Japan, enjoyed watching it a lot! hehehe thank you for posting about this!! I get to watch it! Haha 💟
im SO SO SO SO HAPPY AND BLESSED that you watched it with me and that we got to talk about it together 😭😭😭 you are the BEST and im so happy you enjoyed it as much as i did! i saw online that they’re already doing auditions for season 2 so 👀 i hope we can watch it again then too!!!
Sooo, what are your thoughts? Reactions? Additional infos or gossip you've heard/read about the cast or show? Hehehe LET'S TALK!! I'm so excited what you think about all of these!!! Can't wait! 👀👀💟💟
-🧇
OKOK ive been on reddit a lot and they post all the insta posts that the contestants post!! most of them have been pupu or lupin (super cute hehe) but like .... this one really worried me, about Minami’s deleted IG reel. i can totally understand how she might have come off way too aggressive or rude because of the editing, even though i believe she and Mori ended things on good terms. just thinking about what happened in Terrace House with the cyberbullying... i’m super worried about her and i hope that she isn’t getting too much hate coming her way! i was also afraid of Midori getting some rude comments afdsljksadf. like at the end of the day we’re only seeing these ppl for a few months and not their whole lives. there’s a lot about them that we don’t know so i cant even fathom wanting to send a stranger rude msgs. ugh asfdlkjasfd i hope theyre all doing well. 
on the lighter side, ive felt really happy seeing more pics of our favorite couple 🥺😭 such a crazy way to meet and i am just overwhelmed that it all worked out and was great. just take my whole heart pls omg. also the fact that most of the candidates seemed to at least make 1-2 friends, even if they didn’t find a lifelong partner. that’s really great bc they all have this super unique experience to bond over. sighhhhhh this was just such a wholesome ride compared to the US version. i actually watched a clip of Shake and Deepti’s wedding ceremony and then read an article about the drama that went on and i was like DAMN lmao that’s actually insane. have you read about them? 🤣 i dont wanna say too much and spoil you if you havent!!!
anyway--i look forward to your response if you wanna discuss further!! <3
also... on a honest side note, which im putting down here because im sure only you (+ a few other ppl, if that) will read this far down LOL. thank you again for your patience. ive felt so bad about not being able to get this reply out to you in a decent time frame. the truth is, ive been really struggling with being online and on social media in the past little while, especially with all the news and the daily bombardment of just people being awful to each other online. compounded with my headaches/eye strain it’s all just been a lot to process so i’ve been away from my laptop and away from a lot of my usual haunts. i didnt post it online on my profile bc i didnt wanna seem like a drama queen so ive just been doing myself and my life. so thank you for waiting for me and i appreciate you SO SO much 😭💖 i hope you’re taking care and that you had a great March ❤️ and that April will be even better for you ❤️❤️❤️❤️ 
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Subtle Nonbinary Moodboard with Themes of Recovery and Healing
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lasquadrasfuckhouse · 3 years
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hello I am back with a request if that’s ok with you q w q ) for la squadra with scenario-hc’s with their s/o taking care of them ( can go nsfw if you’d like but for now sfw thoughts ) as much as I love them taking care of their s/o I love when the roles are switched. Can be injured or other— but the goal is to make them feel safe and loved for as much as possible, like my other ask tender emotional moments are my jam. If find the muse for it 💖 if not that’s completely ok too. Pls & thnk u 🥰
ALWAYS OKAY W/ ME I LOVE SEEING U IN MY ASKBOX!!!! it's tendie hours 😍
taking care of la squadra 😌
risotto ✂️
it isn't easy to get risotto to relax, he's a workaholic. sit on him and give him a Look that you're not moving and neither is he, and he'll be so charmed that he'll relent.
he's also more used to taking care of people than being taken care of, so it's a bit of an adjustment to sit on his ass for a few days until he's recovered from the worst of whatever injury/illness he's got, but he finds himself getting like, quietly kind of emotional about it. he hasn't allowed himself to be cared for in a long time and he expresses that to you, and how much he appreciates and loves you.
he finds he really enjoys the opportunity to relax, cause yeah he's under the weather but at least he can chill for a bit. and he'd very much love to chill with you if you have the time. quiet cuddles or existing comfortably in the same space will have him feeling very cozy, loved, and rested. kiss him on the forehead to remind him that he is soft and precious and he'll want to snuggle you all day with a little smile on his face.
prosciutto 🚬
also not used to being taken care of. he'll be grumpy and try to micromanage the house from his bed at first (and you probably banished him to bed because he wasn't getting any rest on the couch). he relaxes when he wants to!!!! remind him that he needs time to recover and he's only human, and you promise the house won't fall apart without him. not only is he soft for you but he trusts you completely, so he relaxes.
he might be a bit restless, but set him up with a book and he'll be good. you may even take on prosciutto-like mannerisms in his place, like shushing the others if they're being too noisy. if he overhears you insisting on peace and quiet so he can rest, he'll smile to himself.
what really gets him and lets him know he's loved is taking over what he usually does while he rests, like folding his laundry and putting it away in the order he likes. and if you initiate the classic forehead touch with a smile and tell him to chill so he can get better, he'll gladly lay around all day thinking of you.
pesci 🎣
he tries to power through it but no honey you need to rest. give him puppy eyes and say you really want him to relax and get better, and he'll do it for you. he will get SO better for his babe just u see!!!!
he's also kind of glad for the chance to have downtime tho, even tho he's typically eager to help and stuff. he just wishes he didn't feel like ass. cheer him up with lots of cuddles and quiet relaxing things u can do together and he'll feel loads better!!!
he may feel kind of bad at first like oh no he doesn't want to bother u. but reassure him that he is never a bother, u love him and love being with him and that doesn't change when he's under the weather. he will accept that and thank u wholeheartedly for taking care of him
formaggio 🧀
milks it for all its worth. OOOH BABE IM IN SO MUCH PAAAIN PLEASE HOLD MEEE 😩 if he's feeling like shit at least he's gonna get cuddles out of it
would love nothing more than to snuggle up and watch stupid movies with you all day. he may just cling to you if you try to get up and insists that someone else can fetch you both dinner/blankets/etc instead. you're his best medicine!!! his comfort!!!! do not seperate!!!!!
but he is a sucker for a home cooked meal. even if you go for a bit, if you come back with something u made urself, even if it's not the most amazing display of chef skills, he'll be falling all over himself with how much he loves you because you put love and effort into something to make him feel better
illuso ✨
one of the WORST when he gets sick or injured because he just complains and lays on the pity party even more than formaggio. everything sucks!!! woe is illuso!!!! he needs ur healing kisses!!!!!
he definitely goes into the mirror world to rest b/c he needs peace and quiet or he'll get cranky. but he will bring u ofc. not just to be pampered either he's just cozy and happy in ur company
lavishing him in attention aside, what will REALLY tug on his heart is taking initiative to take care of him, like asking first how he's feeling, bringing an extra blanket cause you know he likes to have a pile of them, offering to very gently brush his hair. just like, little genuine attentive things. it may get him blushing
melone 🍈
very practical about it, there's that whole thing of 'people with medical backgrounds are the worst patients for one reason or another' but he doesn't try to take shortcuts with the rest he knows he needs and he's very polite and patient with asking for/instructing on what he needs
he's great at finding ways to entertain himself so no worries in that regard. if he's worried about getting you sick he may actually discourage cuddles for once in his life but otherwise he'd love to snuggle up to his babe all day
he'd honestly just feel really comforted if you told him all about your day and shared cool things with him or the classic 'i saw this and thought of you' he'll be 😍
ghiaccio ❄️
EXTRA grumpy when he's uncomfortable or in pain and unable to work his energy out. he's very active, so his body (or you) making him sit on his ass when he doesn't want to will leave him very prickly even though logically he knows it's for the best.
he'll generally want his space but then have bouts of feeling very cuddly. picture him cocooned in blankets with only the top half of his face visible and his general grumpy glower relaxes as u massage his scalp like calming an angry cat.
he'll be very thankful for everything you do, including kissing his cheeks or leaving him to chill with some water and a book or shushing the others if they're being too rowdy. but he'll be extra super thankful and soft if you bundle him up and go for a walk with him around the block just to stretch his legs and get some fresh air cause you know how much he hates sitting around.
sorbet and gelato 🔪🍦
if one of them is under the weather, the house gets a brief respite from their antics cause you and the other one are there to entertain them and curb their restlessness. if they're both sick/injured, good fucking luck because their boredom will feed off each other and it will be a nightmare.
sorbet likes to chill but he always needs new surroundings. he'll want to stay on the couch to at least observe the house's regular chaos but if you (and maybe gelato) see that he's not getting enough rest you will have to literally drag him into your bedroom because 1) he's not letting go of his entertainment that easily 2) it's fun to watch you struggle. he is devising every way to cause problems on purpose without moving around too much
gelato HATES sitting still so he is slowly going insane and he will let you know it. get him a big stack of movies, let him have free reign of the tv, play cards with him etc if you know what's good for the whole house because otherwise he won't stay in bed or he'll do shit like scream for help just to see you rush in and then grin and be like oh nvm babe im fine :)
you thought they were a handful together regularly? HAH. when they're sick or injured together they enable each other even more than usual. you are the only one capable of placating them, enjoy being squished between your two extremely cuddly boyfriends.
cuddles and kisses and loving attention always make them feel better, a surefire way to get them to actually rest is by snuggling them. but even if you do go for a bit, what brightens them up is hearing about all the new happenings on base or this cute dog you saw or if you bring them new snacks every day or try making something different for dinner. like, not just to placate them, but cause you know they're bored and uncomfortable and you want to cheer them up, that's what gets them. and then they'll pull you down and hold you for the rest of the night.
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fandom-blackhole · 3 years
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I'll See You in my Dreams- Soulmate AU
AN: First off, sorry I didn't have this up earlier, I went through so tough writer's block that is kicking my ass and my school year has begun so I had to focus on that for a bit. Second, I wanted to say, the next thing I write is probably going to be the next part for Merman!Din because I hit 100 kudos on the fic over on Ao3. Third, starting probably towards the end of this week, maybe Thursday or Friday, I am going to start character takeovers. I will make a post about who it will be and how long it will be around during the morning and reblog it throughout the day along with any disclaimers/rules. I am thinking this is something I can do during the weekends when I don't have classes and Im not writing. Love you all and I hope you enjoy this fic!
Masterlist
Pairing: Paz Vizsla x Reader
Words: 1K (sorry its short....)
Summary: What if you, someone from Earth, miraculously were soulmates to someone in a galaxy far, far away?
Warnings: descriptions of pains, sadness, yearning, soft love confessions and promises, unedited bc I am tired and just wanted to post this
The dreams, oh, the dreams….
They come and they never stop, always leaving wondering and wanting, aching.
You do not understand them, what they meant, if anything other than a manifestation of desires, but when he appears you feel like you are in another world, another galaxy all your own, made for you and him alone. He tells you you are his one, his only, and your heart soars with every small touch and smile. His whisper of your name, and promises sworn in a language so foreign, yet familiar after years of their whispered softness, cause you to feel like you're floating, like you are where you are meant to be, in this loving man's arms.
Only...each day as you wake, you come crashing down into the same disappointing reality, reminding yourself that he is not there, and he is only a cruel trick your mind plays upon you heart and soul each night, laughing as you wake to the same cold loneliness of day, ripped from the warmth of his arms that hold you each night. It had been like this since you could remember, even as you were a child he would appear in your dreams and ask if you wanted to play with him. He told you stories that his family, his culture taught him, the things that were even at that age obviously very important to him.nYou parents would praise you for your creativity when you repeated the stories to them. They never understood.
Your parents didn't understand why you never let go of this imaginary figure in your dreams. They couldn't comprehend why even after you grew away from the imaginary friend stage you still talked about the boy that simply did not exist to them.
The older you got, the more you realized that you wanted no one else but him. No one else could make you smile or laugh the way he could. No one else made you feel safe the way he did. No one could come close to making you feel cherished or content the way he did. No one could touch just how loved you felt each night when he gave you that shining smile, followed by an endearment in his sacred language- he had attempted to teach you a few basics at one point, but he only kept chuckling and teasing you softly as you tripped over the words he said so effortlessly.
It wasn’t until you were graduating high school and looking into colleges when it dawned on you how much you loved the man in your dreams. How you would never be happy with another, not knowing he was there, even if he was not real. You would never find anyone better than the boy you had watched grow into a man, than the person who listened to you talk endlessly about your life, the one you told all your secrets to never holding any information back because you knew he would never judge you. But this, this realization you kept to yourself, not wanting to share and find heartbreak from the one person you knew you would never be able to recover from.
So you pulled back slowly, never fully distancing yourself how could you, but you tried to never come too close, fearing the pain that would follow if you did. And you hated every second of it.
As you progressed through college, you both lamented your stresses to the other seeking comfort in just venting or just listening to the other’s voice. You were busy with school, stressing over finals and papers, while he was worried about his people, his covert who he was now lead and teach, he worried about the future generations as his people’s numbers kept diminishing.
Life and stresses seemed to take over and pass in rhythms. Soon you both found yourselves in a comfortable dance, but one that had each side aching for more but unable to ask for it.
By the time you graduated from school, on track already to work your dream job, you found yourself suddenly feeling hollow. A feeling that started showing up in dreams, a feeling that was only suppressed when you brushed against his hand, or he reached out and hugged you before you both woke. But it did not take long for the feeling to spread into your waking hours. Life became numb at best, painful at most. The feeling only getting worse as you were with him. Some nights it felt like your entire body was screaming for the man you could not have.
But it changed one night suddenly. You had not even got to say hello or hi to him before he pulled you into his embrace, whispering words of defeat, whispering how he could no longer hold back, being apart from you for so long hurt him. He said that his very soul was hurting and he just needed to hold you for the night. And you caved. You caved and held him as tightly as he held you, hot tears slipping down your cheeks as you hiccupped the words you never wanted to tell him. You stuttered through devotions and dozens and dozens of ‘i love yous’, and you were overjoyed, bursting at the seams when he returned each with his own love confession, with his own devotions for you. And you only cried harder, finding yourself slowly being soothed by his rumbling voice in his chest and his calm words.
You both stayed like that. The night ticking by but moving slower than normal, or it could just be the quiet nothing of the world as you held tight to each other. Maybe it was just wishful thinking, hopes to freeze in time and never wake again if it meant staying here wrapped in the other’s soft love and body.
But….like each night come to pass, you found yourself being lulled and pulled away from the man you loved so forcefully. He could feel it too, you knew he could by the way his arms tightened, and as his final words were whispered into your ear before you were ripped apart.
“Mesh’la, my fierce love, I swear on the name of my ancestors, that I, Paz Viszla, will find away to reach you in daylight. I will come for you, cyare, I promise with all my being I will come to you.”
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alreadyblondenow · 3 years
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You and your words | Hendery
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❤︎ Prince!Hendery x female!reader ❤︎ Fluff, Smut, Smut, Angst, Royalty AU, best friends to lovers, fuck buddies for some time hehe ❤︎ 3/4 for LOVE MONTH SERIES: Boys Don’t Cry One is a big number
One is a big number | You and your words | Sweet | He loves me, he loves me not |
Summary: You and prince Hendery are good friends... who lust for each other and trying so hard not to fall in love. But your mother, an ambitious woman, wants to use prince Hendery to improve the status of your family.  
Word count: 9,614k
Warnings: Unprotected sex, virginity loss, making out, best friends but they lust for each other, masturbation (male), mentions of masturbations (female), they think of each other when they masturbate ano ba, fingering, a lot of kissing, dirty talk, corruption, slight exhibitionism, mentions of oral sex, fuck buddies for some time, dirty talking... but through love letters.... haha, mentions of other idols, strict parents, mother issues, Hendery being a spoiled prince, slight cheating, a lot of bad decisions, you might get mad to Hendery or reader?
A/N: PURE FICTION. PURE FICTION. PURE FICTION. inspired by the Netflix series Bridgerton and First Burn from Hamilton. 
For my baby’s Love Letter event, @neosmutcollective​ HAPPY CUPID DAY!
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February 14
My dearest best friend,
I am inviting you to my family’s soirée and ask you to accompany me the whole night. In return, I will sing praises about you to my cousin Xiaojun.
Prince Hendery
Everyone knows that an invitation to the queen’s soirée is the holy grail and it is very hard to be invited especially if the queen or king does not know you personally. But you, the ever so beautiful Y/n, is friends with their son Prince Hendery. So it’s up to you to claw your way to the top and to honor your family. At least that's what your mother wants you to do.
You don’t request anything from the prince, no. Everything that he does or gives to you is voluntarily and because he loves you dearly. As a friend.
It all began when he accidentally bumped you a little too hard because he was in a hurry to avoid a certain dance with someone he does not know. You were both in your teenage years at that time and it was a season where young people were rather picky. The young gents always look for the prettiest most flawless lady, and the young ladies always.... well, avoid anyone or everyone unless he's the prince.
You were quite young by that time and you didn’t care about courting, suitors, love letters, or expensive flowers. That’s why you didn’t know what the prince looked like nor his name, because you didn’t care at all.
“My apologies my lady, I didn’t see you” he offered his hand and pulled you from the ground. It was so kind of him to help you get up and straighten your dress. Not to mention he kissed the back of your gloved hand and apologized again.
“It’s fine. Is someone running after you?” you pursed your lips and hugged yourself to protect yourself from the cold. The palace gardens have it’s unique February breeze, you thought.
“Here,” he smoothly removed his coat and put it around you. “I’m Hendery” he smiled when he finally realized that you don’t know who you are with right now.
“Y/n. The ball is kind of boring and quiet. N-no offense to the queen and her family but everyone seems so uptight and pushing us, the young people to entertain the adults- I’m sure you understand what I’m saying here” your tone was a little loud and the annoyance caused by your mother is slowly showing.
“Very much. In fact, I was running away from a dance that I don’t want to be a part of” he giggles so handsomely to show his support for what you’re feeling right now. "Love is the last thing that I desire right now but my mother wants me to entertain a bunch of women and converse for some time with their mother or father"
“How many girls did you entertain tonight?” you asked back, and also giving back his coat because you’re about to leave him.
“Two. My mother and my sister” he answered proudly which made you smile and let out a small laugh. At least between the two of you, he has the freedom to say no.
When you finally got back to the boring party, your mother was quick to fix your hair and fluff your dress before she pushes you again on the dance floor and dance with the prince. She told you she went to great lengths so you could have some time to dance with the crowned prince even if it’s just for a few seconds.
“Work your magic young lady, enchant the prince, and try to make him interested in you. Be useful like your sisters, be engaged to the prince soon and all is well” your mother’s exact words.
Ah right. Of course, your mother’s priority is to use you as bait to the bigger fishes so you could earn their love and respect. So with a heavy heart and feet, you walked in the middle of the dance floor, feeling so ashamed and humiliated for you were so sure that the prince will not show up because he does not have any interest.
Tears are starting to ball at the corner of your eye but you felt a shiver on your spine when someone tapped you from behind.
Lo and behold, prince Hendery came and graced you with his attention.
“Are those tears?” He was quick to grab your hand and waist to save you from the humiliation but the place started gossiping in no time. You can hear people asking one another if you’re royalty, where did you come from and why is the prince only interested in having a dance with you.
“I’m sorry my prince,” you cleared your throat and hope that your face is pleasing, “we meet again, I have no idea that you’ve been gracing me with your time already. My apologies”
He let out a small laugh before he twirled you. “That’s Hendery, not prince Hendery. The quick moment that I shared with you outside made me feel that I’m free” he whispered beside your ear. So sincere, so true, but it sounded like he’s calling for help.
“Thank you prince Hendery, my mother is pleased”
“I too. I mean, the queen is pleased”
“How about you, your grace, are you pleased?”
“Very much pleased. Tell me, what’s your name?” You stepped back and bowed down to him, as low as you can.
“Lady Y/n L/n, your grace” you smiled and slowly recovered from your bow.
And in that very moment, while a unique friendship is slowly blooming in the middle of the dance floor, everyone started hating you even before knowing your name or family name.
But for prince Hendery, it’s a name that he will never forget and love starting that night.
From there on you and prince Hendery became the best of friends, making the whole town jealous and making everyone crave your attention, begging for you to answer the golden question which is, “Are you two in love with each other?” Something neither you nor Hendery can’t answer because you do love each other, but not deep enough.
Months and years have passed and still, you and prince Hendery please your mothers by being sweet whenever you have eyes watching. Balls, birthday parties, luncheons, soirées, all to which you and prince Hendery had a great time making everyone jealous. Like tonight, where prince Hendery should be right beside you because you are his guest but he is nowhere to be found. Until one of his guards came to you and told you, “Prince Hendery is asking for you in his bedroom, my lady” thankfully it was a whisper, or else it could have been a big scandal.
You have never stepped foot into prince Hendery’s room even though the two of you are incredibly close. No one can enter a royal bedroom except family, guards, maids, or his future fiancé. That’s why you were nervous while you continue to question yourself, ‘what are you doing here?’ until you found yourself in front of the prince’s bedroom and his guard opened the door for you.  
“Are you going to marry me?” You asked after the guard shut the door, teasing your best friend and not coming any closer to him.
“Will you please come join me to bed? I’m sad” he pouted so cutely and lie on his side. “You look lovely tonight. The flowers I sent you this morning match your dress perfectly, I picked it from the garden where we first met” he added.
You giggle and told him to look at your head, there he saw a flower from the ones he sent you. “Creative,” he says and pats his bed one more, still asking for you to lie beside him. Of course, you gave up eventually, but you lie so far from him that he had to pull the sheets a little too harshly to get a hold of you which completely startled you and made you nervous. “Much better,” he says, face closer to you than ever that his breath touches your skin.
“No more games my prince, why did you summon me here?” you’ve never been close to Hendery like this. If the queen hears about this, you and your family will be in trouble.
“Nothing special, I just want to be free before I become the night's hot topic” he admitted.
“That's why I'm here. I promise to drag you away whenever someone is coming” He smiles at your effort to cheer him up, “or would you prefer dancing the whole night so we don't get disturbed?” you offered him a hug while you two lie in bed comfortably. “Everything will be fine as long as Im here” you added.  
“Exactly, that's why I called you here” he smiles and closed his eyes, listening to the distant violin playing from downstairs. And to make him feel better, you threw away your shyness and rest your head on his chest. He automatically wraps his arms around you and giggled while his eyes were still closed. Secretly happy that you’re slightly on top of him while his embrace becomes tighter and tighter by the second until your face is much closer to his face again when he rolled on the side dragging your body with him.
Shyness creeps in your bones again as he looks at you deeply. Making your body incredibly warm by just looking at you and keeping your body close. You tell yourself, ‘look away, it’s improper to look at your prince like this’ but you can’t and you don’t want to.
“If I ask you to kiss me, will you say no to me?” he bravely asked, eyes hoping for you to say yes. But when you’re taking too long to answer, you saw the disappointment in his eyes, and his embrace was becoming loose. “I’m sorry for being a fool-“
To his surprise, you didn’t answer him through your words but through your actions. You kissed your prince friend on the lips which he returned without hesitation. He was happy and he’s proving it by the way he kisses you, smiling in between taking breaths, letting out a soft moan whenever he’s being too carried away. You didn’t expect to love the way how his lips touch yours, you didn’t expect him to be a good kisser but it was so good that when you closed your eyes you thought you were in a cloud and an angel is kissing you.
It was slow and not rushed. It is as if time stopped while your heads were turning and your tongues were fighting for dominance while no one noticed that your fingers are intertwined. When he pulled away and kissed your forehead to end the moment, he thanked you for not refusing and even asked you where did you learn to kiss like that. “I’m glad the first lips I ever kissed is owned by a woman who truly, cares for me” he smiles and kissed the back of your hand one too many times before he got up from his bed, and offered his hand to help you.
That night, while you and prince Hendery were kissing privately, something sparked inside him that he had never felt before. You may not know but during the party, prince Hendery noticed that you can be someone he can be in love with.
February 19
My dearest Y/n,
Have you been well? When can I see you again? Did you receive the flowers that I sent you and your mother? Perhaps I could pay you a visit and we can have a picnic somewhere private.
I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop thinking about the kiss we shared.
Prince Hendery
Days after that beautiful kiss, prince Hendery sent you beautiful flowers, one for each corner of your home that even your mother was impressed and had the wrong idea. Of course, she thought the prince is courting you and that sending you many expensive flowers is a sign that he is now ready to show his seriousness to you.
“May I see that letter, dear?” she reached out her hand, waiting for you to hand prince Hendery’s recent letter.
“Mother, I’m sure the prince will not be pleased with your idea," you said in the nicest way but the tone of your voice had a hint of begging. Why must she put you in this position? Your own mother. She walked slowly towards you and snatched the letter from your hand and watch your mother betray you in front of your eyes.
After reading, she was very much amused and happy by what she just read. “the kiss we shared, eh?” she said with a smirk. “Write back-“
“I will not” you talked back.
“Write back or I will” she said with a stern voice, “you are to write back and flatter the prince. Tell him you want to happen again, tell him to invite you again to one of his family’s events”
“Mother, I don’t talk like that”
“Whatever, just do as I say For our family’s name, for our family’s sake. Be useful like your sisters” she straightens up her posture and told you to go to your room and write the letter.
You thought that your mother understood the friendship that you have with Hendery but turns out she still wants to use you as bait and to get the attention of the royal family. It sickens you, to be honest. Because Hendery is a decent person, always nice to you and your family and also you love him dearly as a friend.
As you look at the blank paper and arrange your thoughts, trying so hard to talk like how your mother wants but you just can’t. So instead, you told him the truth and what your heart says.
February 19
Dear Prince Hendery,
You care for me always, I am well thank you for asking.
Apologies for not being around these days, I was catching up with some readings. I did receive the lovely flowers, they were very beautiful my mother was pleased.
I miss you awfully. And the private picnic you offered sounds wonderful and can be arranged for tomorrow.
Lady Y/n
“No mention of the kiss?” prince Hendery whined to his best friend Ten while he watches him clean his hands from their afternoon hunt.
“Maybe the story that you told me is just part of your imagination,” Ten laughed.
“It’s not. It’s much real- how can I bring this up to her again? I want it to happen again”
“Oh, you’re a spoiled prince. When will you change? Tell me my, friend, do you love her, or you’re willing to use her for your desperateness?” it was a bold question to open the eyes of the prince.
“I do love her but, it’s very little and I’m sure I’m driven by my lust” the prince admitted.
“Then court her. Feelings can grow and the next thing you know, you now have a queen. And your mother will be pleased”
Hendery shook his head to show his disappointment to his friend. He may be the prince but he believes that he’s not born in this world to merely please his mother but to follow what his heart really wants. Like to marry the one he loves.
On the next day, as promised, the prince planned a private picnic for just the two of you and it was perfect. Being with prince Hendery is like an escape from the reality of your home and for prince Hendery, being with you makes him feel normal. “The sun feels good, doesn’t it?” he put a strawberry in your mouth and watch you chew it while you lie comfortably on his lap.
Since when did you two start to exchange flirty glances? you asked yourself. But you shrugged it off and continue to mind your thoughts. You may not know but it’s obvious that your mind is not in this picnic and prince Hendery can see right through you, he knows something is bothering you so he asked you. “Nothing my prince, I’m just thinking and admiring the perfect weather,” you said with the slightest of interest.
“Why are you so proper when you’re writing to me or when you’re with me? What's the matter? Speak your mind your prince demands it,” he ate another strawberry and you got up from your comfortable position.
“That’s not fair,” you said because you can’t tell him what’s really on your mind.
“It was meant to be a joke, what’s wrong?”  
He will never give up until you tell him something that will stop his curiosity, so you didn’t have a choice but to lie. “Having no suitors and my desire to escape from reality. That bothers me” you said and tried diverting your attention by indulging at the feast in front of you.
“Maybe there’s a reason for that. Look for a suitor that's very much like me” he says boldly, looking at you deeply like he’s telling you the answer is right in front of you already. And to be honest, a suitor that’s very much like the prince doesn’t sound so bad. He’s a gentleman, has good intentions, and also a good kisser.
“I will keep that in mind. Now read me poetry and tell me stories,” you went back to your comfort on his lap and listen to him talk while you two bask under the beautiful weather. He reads you tons of poetry that sounded real and full of emotions, tells you stories about his childhood and the things that he wants to do in life, even fed you with the palace gossips, and made you laugh. Again, the picnic is perfect and prince Hendery once again provided an escape from your ugly thoughts.  
You watch the sun go down while you both finish the wine in your cups and eat the leftover cheese because there's nothing left anymore. Both a little tipsy from the wine already, laughing and giggling before midnight strikes then out of nowhere, the rain poured so hard that it got you both soaked in a matter of minutes.
Running hand in hand to look for a shade as the field becomes darker each second, good thing prince Hendery saw a thick tree that can provide shade in the meantime. With soaking clothes and wet skins you stand closely together behind the thick tree, waiting for the rain to stop. But the prince is thanking it silently for giving him this moment with you. A moment with you where he can admire you closely again, a moment with you privately where he can keep you close to him, and a moment with you where he can try and ask for a kiss again.
You’re not stupid. You can feel the warmth of his body like he’s sharing some of it to you, you can feel his fingertips dancing on your exposed back all the way to your nape, letting you feel the wetness of your skin which you very much love but you can’t admit it to yourself.
“You said you wanted an escape well I too,” he leaned forward to give your jaw a soft kiss that’s very much addicting, leaving you for wanting more. He pulled away to look at you for a few seconds, waiting for you to return the kiss and accept his offer. And without any hesitation, you kissed him on the lips and showed him what you want.
“An escape and nothing more-“ you said because giving the prince false hope is the last thing you want to happen.
“I understand, he says with a smile. Very much pleased to see you give in to him and his charms. He kissed you to show you how happy he is, reaching for your right leg and lift the skirt of your dress so he could feel the wetness of your skin further. You moaned and gasp sharply near his ear as you feel your leg locks automatically around his waist as he pushed you on the tree with a grunt and kiss you even more harshly.
Soon you feel his fingers creep in your inner thighs, closer than ever to your sex. “Hendery-“ you moaned when he finally swipes his finger on your sex, wetting his fingers in front of your eyes using his spit and putting it back to your sex and continue to make you feel good. He is holding you tightly as your grip on his shoulder tightens even more. Oh he knows what he’s doing. You smile at that thought while parting your lips, furrowing your brows, and moaning even more deliciously near the prince’s ear.
And while he continues what he’s doing to you, you felt something hard poking your other thigh while his lips were leaving marks on your chest, just right above your breast. Is that what you think it is? Well, if yes then his cock is big, and thinking about it makes you horny even more. “Are you happy?” he whispered, disturbing your lustful thoughts, nod your head yes, and returned your lips to his. Biting it and sucking his tongue, showing him that you are very much driven by lust too.
When he finally found the spot that instantly made your legs shake and your knees weak, he watched you let go right before his eyes and watch you bite your lips and make sinful sounds that he’s very much proud of. Satisfied with the pleasure that he provided, he removed his fingers from your hole and helped you fix your dress. You feel very tired and exhausted, that your legs are about to give up but Hendery will never let you fall. He kissed you more, asked for more and you gave him more until you’re both happy and satisfied with the long kisses that you shared. “Let me bring you home safely” he sweetly requested when he noticed that the rain was long gone and you’re in a middle of a dark field.
Walking hand in hand back to his carriage where his guards are waiting, you two remain unbothered with your wet clothes and stayed happy with the remaining time you have with each other on your way home. And when it’s finally time to part again, he thanked you for a wonderful day which made you incredibly shy as what happened earlier flashes in your mind.
As you settle in your bathroom, sitting on the tub filled with warm water, you can still hear Hendery’s sweet whispers and miss his touch terribly. Smiling through the idea of a gentleman such as Hendery touched you for the first time, and it was quite an experience. But still, you love him as a friend and that will never change because you will not let your mother win and use Hendery’s name to up the status of your family.
He offered you an escape, and that’s what you’re accepting. No more, no less.
February 23
Dearest Y/n,
I am lying to myself if I don’t admit that I miss your lips on mine. How I miss seeing your parted lips, touch the softness of your breast, and the wetness of your sex. I’ve been thinking about you every night since we parted ways after that eventful evening we shared.
But the purpose of this letter is to invite you to my uncle’s ball this evening and accompany me, be my guest and let’s enjoy the night.
Prince Hendery
Knowing that the prince misses you and your lips, is something that can surely make you smile while writing back to him and accept his invitation. Sealing the letter with the slightest of love but flowery words that will surely make him smile too.
This action can be accepted as playing with fire but no one reads your letters aside from the prince himself so you know that whatever you say to him will always be safe.
But right after you sent the letter, you regret writing those filthy words on paper and realized that you are sending it to your best friend.
February 23
Dear Hendery,
The invitation is accepted and I will be delighted to accompany you. But before I close this letter, I want you to know the truth about my impure thoughts.
I think of you at night whenever I touch myself. Imagine that your fingers are the ones inside me and not mine, I spread my legs so wide under the sheets, eyes closed while I try to remember how you please me.
When can we meet privately again? I hope it happens again soon.
Lady Y/n
As expected, while reading the letter that you wrote back privately, the prince’s cock got hard that he had to take care of it at once. So in his quiet room where the doors are locked, he sat on the edge of his bed and pull out his cock from his trousers. Stroking it slowly as he imagines you again, teasing himself so he wouldn’t release so soon.
Holding the letter in his left hand and reading the second phrase over and over again, trying so hard to picture you in his thoughts with your nightgown lifted all the way up until your sex is exposed and you touching yourself. Closing his eyes so tight while he strokes his cock faster than before as he pictures you gripping the sheets so hard and very much near to your orgasm.
Until finally he shoots his cum and lets it drip on his sheets, moaning and grunting deliciously as he enjoys the warm feeling while catching his breath. Wondering how can he control his lustful feelings towards you and turn it to love.  
When the most awaited time has arrived and Hendery’s carriage is waiting outside your house, you didn’t quite expect to feel nervous as this never happened to you before. He was quiet and smiling handsomely when you sat in front of him, waiting for his carriage to move before he does as well.
“You look beautiful as always,” he sat beside you and completely startled you with his actions. A kiss on your gloved hand, and a kiss on your lips.
During the ball, Hendery was busy gracing the place with his presence on behalf of his mother so the two of you did not have much time to talk and dance, although he promised to dance with you once for tonight and that is perfectly fine for you understand his duties.
So while you’re drinking a glass of white wine on the corner, you can’t help but think and foresee the future that you can have with Hendery if you let your mother succeed.
A comfortable life, the wife of the future king, a loving husband, of course, he will give you children, but he will always be away to take care of the country’s current affairs because he is the crowned prince. And you well know that you don’t want a life like that. You want a life where a husband goes home to you every night and makes love to you until you're exhausted and tired.
“I’m sorry” Hendery whispered from behind which startled you. “Are you ready to dance?” you gave him your hand and guide you towards the middle. Careful to put his hand on your waist, trying so hard not to pull you towards him and plant many kisses on your neck.
“I read your letter” he started and completely clueless about your regret about it. You gave him a shy smile and looked away.
“So?” he started again, hoping to hear a response from you this time.
“So what my prince?”  
“Do you still want my fingers inside you?” He teases, whispering beside your ear and smiling as if he’s not making you shy in the middle of the dance floor.
“I beg you-“
“Oh, she begs” He interrupted you and teased you further. But that’s not all, you feel his hand roam on your lower back, bravely did it still despite being guarded with many judging and watchful eyes. Slowly your patience with your friend is wearing thin and so you stared at him long and hard and thankfully he understood what your eyes were saying and stopped teasing you.
“Thank you for shutting up and remembering that you’re a prince,” you clear your throat and continue what you were saying earlier, “your fingers do felt rather nice inside me and... I wish what happened the other night would happen again. But Hendery I beg you, do not tease me like this because someone might hear you. At least talk softly,”
The prince let out a small laugh, so small that only you can hear it while he continues to dance with you and fool everyone for pretending that you’re having an innocent conversation.
“After what happened I can’t seem to forget how you purred beside my ear that night” he stared at you, holding your lower back to assist you more on the dance. “Your tight grips on my shoulders still ghosts my skin, how you say my name as if I am not a prince. But it came out from your mouth in a very sinful way because I am pleasuring you”
“I made those sounds, those sounds that you oh so loved because you knew what you’re doing in between my legs... Hendery” you said it as quietly as possible and smiled so innocently at your prince, feeling every turn and every step became closer than required. Bodies becoming warm in less than a minute that you even felt his skin became instantly hot.
“If you loved how I sound that night, well, I love how you pushed me behind that tree your grace... because I felt your manhood poke my thigh. And my my,” you shook your head from left to right and giggle beside his ear, then decided to stop teasing him and making him hornier than ever when you heard him clear his throat and see the blush on his face.
“The next time we are to be alone again, I want your lips to never leave mine, your body never be covered by layers and layers of silk, and always keep your body close to mine because next time, my fingers won’t be the only one going inside you”
The promise of a very sinful and lustful next time instantly made you feel hot and you feel like your dress is about to pop and your corset will give up in no time. But even though it sounded like it was all about lust, the promise of seeing each other alone again because he loves your presence made your heart swell with happiness and smile from ear to ear as he sways you slowly under a fading string quartet music from the background.
“I never want the song to end, I beg you, not as your prince but as Hendery, keep close to me. Please”
You didn’t want to ruin the moment and feel every note of that beautiful song come to an end. This time you’re no longer fooling anyone, you are simply showing that you adore each other in the middle of the dance floor with a sea of young people.
“Tell me, what else do you love your grace?” You asked him just before you part from the dance and bow.
“You. I love you”
Usually, when someone confesses their love to someone, positive reactions are expected from both persons. And when Hendery said it out of nowhere he wanted to take it back in an instant because it is not sincere and it is not true. Yet.
“Take it back, you don’t know what you’re saying. You don’t love me” it was so hard to breathe at the moment. But you say it over and over again, very close to being mad but you can't make a scene “Please Hendery, take it back it’s not true and what you’re feeling is lust not love” you said sternly completely offending the prince with the truth.
“Alright, alright I take it back. I’m sorry, I’ll get you a glass of water. Come”
And so, the lovely night has ended earlier than expected. Hendery brought you home safely without a promise of seeing each other soon again.
Everything changed and it’s all because of lust.
March 2
To my dearest prince Hendery,
It’s been many days since the last time that we saw each other. Are you mad at me?  
Word is spreading that you’re leaving the country for several weeks to attend an important meeting representing your mother. Is it true? Were you planning to tell me?
Please write back and meet me soon. I miss you.
Lady Y/n
After reading your letter and keeping it safe in his drawer, prince Hendery admitted to himself first that he misses you too, and that no he’s not mad at you. He’s just humiliated and he’s not yet ready to show his face.
It’s his mistake in the first place. He promised to offer you an escape, no more no less. “Unbelievable Hendery,” he murmurs to himself.
After a few days of self-pity and gathering his courage to face you again, he finally gave in to your request and meet you. He apologized while you two walk around town with his guards on the side, ate lunch at his favorite restaurant, and chat until your hearts are happy. Everything felt normal again, you can hear people starting to gossip about you and Hendery so you figured all is well between you and him.
“Tomorrow is my last night here, please accompany me. My mother insisted to host a ball, I told her no need but she still made preparations” he scoffed and finished the tea he’s drinking.
You didn’t want to ruin the mood and ruin the peace between you two but you have to tell him the truth, “Xiaojun- uh, asked me to accompany him and I accepted his offer,”
“Well, you could have said no. Didn’t you thought of me?” his voice was suddenly higher and stern. He wanted to shout at you but you don’t deserve that, you’re very much important to him so he won’t do that.
“I’m sorry my prince” you murmured and lowered your head.
“Don’t lower yourself for me. I think so highly of you, please” he reached for your hand kissed your knuckles, “It’s alright. My cousin is good company” he says, comforting you further.
When you and Hendery parted ways and while the prince is on his way home, he finally admitted to himself that he is jealous. Jealous because he knew you and his cousin Xiaojun used to like each other, and now he’s clueless if you still like each other.
He can’t eat properly and kept thinking if he should steal you from his cousin. He can’t sleep despite being so tired physically and kept thinking about how he’s not spending his last night here with you.
And when his last night in town comes, during the ball, Hendery is forcing himself to smile and greet his guests. Trying so hard not to look at you and his cousin Xiaojun for he doesn’t know if he can control himself from being jealous.
“Unaccompanied, huh?” Ten teases Hendery and looked around the place for you. Only to find out that you came with his cousin, “Ah... I see” Ten smirks and continues drinking his wine.
“I’m jealous so go ruin someone else's night-“
“No my friend, I’m here to rescue you,” he whispers and called someone from afar. “Prince Hendery I want you to meet my cousin Lady Lisa,” the beautiful lady bowed to the prince to give respect, complimented the prince, and soon earned his attention and invited her to dance.
Of course, a royal attraction such as Hendery with a different woman in the dance floor can awaken the gossipers in an instant. But it's not the gossipers that irritate you the most. It’s her giggles, Hendery’s hold on her waist, his beautiful smile when he talks to her-
“Are you alright dearest?” Xiaojun whispers, completely bringing you back to reality. You breathed in deeply and exhaled sharply before drinking your wine in one go.
“Excuse me for a moment, I need air and privacy” you request from the gentleman in front of you. Nodding with a lot of questions in his mind, Xiaojun did not even dare to stop you.
And away you go to the palace gardens to breathe and let out your jealousy. Breathing deeply over and over again, wishing to be separated from the corset that’s suffocating you. Until you finally calmed down and had the need to admire the stars in the sky and listen to the distant chatters from the ball.
“Did my cousin offended you? Violated you perhaps? Are you hurt?”
Hendery came out looking for you immediately when he did not see you by his cousin’s side. He knew that this is the only place you will go to breathe because this is where he first met you.
“No no, I’m fine. Your cousin is a gentleman like you, I just needed some fresh air. Go back to your guests” you shoo him away and suddenly you feel suffocated again.
“I care only about one guest. And she’s standing in front of me right now” Hendery says boldly, walking towards you and pulled you close by the waist and kissed you. Motioning you deeper into the gardens to hide while you share a heated kiss that’s saying, ‘we belong to each other’.
Soon the heated kiss becomes rougher while the prince’s hands roam freely around your body, undoing your dress, trying to free you from this tight corset, and said, “Make love to me tonight”
There was no sign of authority in what he said, you’re sure that it’s not a command from your prince, his voice was serious but full of love and passion. And that’s why you agreed, nod your head and kiss him again, and felt his charming smile in between the kiss.
Not even a single soul from the guests knew that he sneaked you to his bedroom again, dismissed the guards before shutting the door close and locking it.
The room was dark and cold and only the moonlight and the lights from the outside illuminates his room. But when his lips touched your skin again, suddenly it became hot and you feel weak while Hendery is the opposite because you noticed he’s full of energy and burning passion.
“Lie in bed,” he says sweetly but his actions say otherwise for he pushed you, hovers you, and continue removing your clothes. X by X he loosens your corset until you’re finally free and you’re all exposed in front of him. “Better?” He asks and you nod shyly.
When he proceeds to remove his clothes next, it is as if your shyness faded when you saw Hendery’s body in the dark but everything seems clear to you even with minimal light. “Can I spread your legs?” he asks, caressing your knee while he lies beside you and waiting for your consent.
Slowly and gently, he parted your legs and hovers you again, hands exploring around your body without barriers of cloth, kneading your breast while kissing your neck as you listen to him breathe and moan. And when his hands continue to explore your inner thighs, a sharp gasp escaped from your mouth and you spread your legs wider. This time, it’s your turn to feel his naked body and explore it with your hands. Feeling every muscle tighten whenever he makes you moan accidentally.
Then he stopped. Came closer to you until you’re bodies to bodies and his forehead rests on your temple.
You know exactly what’s going to happen next. You knew that it will hurt, and it did but you asked for more, begged rather. You see his handsome face contort when he finally pushed inside you, loving your tight walls, moaning like a mad man. He lifts both of your hand at the top of your head and witness him look at you with eyes full of lust that watches your breasts bounce up and down for every thrust he gives you.
For someone who’s inexperienced like your prince, he surely knew what he was doing. Folding your legs and pushing them closer to your chest so he could thrust deeper. Even he surprises himself.
With quick thrusts, filthy words here and there, and deeper kisses you finally reached your euphoria and moaned his name again. Something he oh so loved hearing and that made him lose his mind and let go. Pulled out immediately and shoots his cum on the sheet, while grunting and moaning so loud that you didn’t even know he’s capable of making such sounds.
When he’s finally calm and has enough energy to move, he gathered the ruined sheets, threw them on the floor, and covered you with the thicker ones. “What happened was special, don’t you think?” He asks and joined you under the thick sheets and kept you close to his still exposed body.
“Special indeed,” you said and reached for his lips to plant a soft kiss.
Now you know that you do have feelings for him.
“I want you to take this, as a promise that I will soon be home” you watch him remove his silver necklace and transfer it around your neck, leaving sweet kisses on your shoulders before pulls away. He promised to come home soon so he can replace the necklace with something even more expensive when he gets back. “Oh I wish to see you more like this wearing nothing but my necklace”
“Then don’t go. Stay here, the world will not go into war if you chose to stay” He smiles so sweetly at you, happy that you’re on the same page.
“Just for a couple of weeks, my love” he says and kissed your hand many times.
“So we're in love, huh?” You tease him.
He scoffed and looked deeply into your eyes, “I think we started being in love on the night first met. We were too young to think about love but I know we loved each other for years now”
And just like that, after years and years of going against your mother, you’re finally defeated because what Hendery said is true.
On the next morning, you and your prince spend the whole morning making love quietly and making sure that your time left with each other is not wasted. Exploring each other’s bodies further and diving headfirst to lust.
“Please “ you giggle quietly, covering your mouth as you moan with every flick of his tongue on your clit. You both came several times now and you feel so weak already in the middle of the morning. “You need to prepare,” you reminded him before he starts again and asks for one last. Finally, you feel him spread kisses on your body all the way up until his head appears from the thick sheets.
When the time of parting has finally come, he put you on a carriage first before he leaves. “You’re going to be a great king” and he wishes for you to be beside him always and forever. “Safe travels, my love. Write to me every day” you whisper to him and kiss him before you go inside the carriage.
“Expect love letters from now on. I’ll be home soon, think of me always” he says and kissed you goodbye.
The promise of receiving love letters from Hendery every day was kept. You read them in the morning when you wake up and at night before you sleep. Smiling like a fool and giggling alone as you remember his sweet words and miss him even more.
This has been yet your happiest time with Hendery. Although you’re not together physically, but through the continuous exchanges of love letters, your hearts felt closer than before. And you find it amazing because being oceans apart from each other should be hard and heartbreaking but no, your words and his words give comfort to your hearts.
March 10
To my love who’s oceans apart from me,
My heart longs for you and I miss your presence.
The country is treating me well with their good hospitality and pays high respect to my mother the queen. It feels like I’m on vacation rather than an important royal matter.
It’s morning here and I’m sitting by the beautiful garden with beautiful flowers as I write this letter and think of you. Now that it’s clear that we are deeply in love, I realized that I am in love with my best friend and the mere thought of it makes me blush and makes me smile naturally.
I think of you every second my love, imagining you reading a book in front of me or sleeping right beside me in my huge bed. I want to wake up and see your smile first thing in the morning or feel your warmth for as long as I want. But let us not worry for time will pass by so fast and we will be together again.
When I get back, we should have more picnics, share longer kisses, make love every night. Let us never let go of each other.
I love you.
Hendery
March 15
To my loving prince,
My heart aches for you too but your words give great comfort to my heart. This distance between us is nothing compared to our patience.
I am more than glad that the country is treating you well. Tell me everything you do there, I miss your stories. You’re going to be a great king and I wish you won’t forget to take care of yourself there. Eat plenty and rest when needed. My heart won’t take it if you get sick or become tired.
As promised, I always think of you too. My head is so full of you that you visit me in my dreams more often than usual. And I too my prince, want to see your charming smile in the morning and even at night.
Stretch your patience more my love. When you get back, I will never leave your side. But for now, I am happily and patiently waiting for your return.  
I love you.
From the woman you love who’s oceans apart from you.
And for days and days of being apart, you and Hendery exchanged love letters and make each other smile through the paper. You tell him stories and gossips from home and he tells you stories and gossips from the country he’s staying.
“My prince, I brought bad news” The voice of his royal guard disturbed his peace while reading one of your letters. “How dare you ruin my peace, what now?” he says, still smiling from the letter he’s reading.
“Your stay here is extended, my prince” the royal guard informed him and did not dare to look his prince in the eye for he knew it will make him angry. “Your presence is requested at a royal gathering that your mother can’t attend to” he added.
And right then and there, Hendery thought about you and wanted to tell you the news immediately. He wrote as fast as he could and told his guard to send the letter immediately for Hendery was scared and disappointed with himself to give you false hope.
April 30
My dearest prince whom I love,
I waited for your arrival but you did not come. For days I was worried and could not eat or sleep well and all I did was think of you. Pray that you’re safe and wait patiently for you.
But now that I have received your letter I can finally stop worrying and stop imagining unpleasant scenarios. How are you?
I miss you terribly.
Y/n
May 20
My love,
Thank you for understanding further.
My purpose and responsibility here are becoming more tiring each day that passes but the promise of seeing you once I’m done here is the only thought that gives me energy.
Unpleasant scenarios? Imagine only me showering you with love, imagine us strolling across town and shock the gossipers and silence them once and for all when we finally announce our relationship.
Think only happy thoughts, my love, I will be with you soon.
I love you.
Hendery.
And that is the last letter you received from him for the month of May.
Hendery was told that someone is plotting to assassinate him and for his own safety, he has to leave the country secretly and go to a country where no one knew he is there. Even you.
For your own safety, Prince Hendery stopped writing you letters for the assassins can and might track you because of him. He will not forgive himself if you are to be tracked and hurt by an assassin because of a love letter.
Little did you know that he did not send his last letter on the 20th of May, and a very heartfelt love letter is on its way to you.
“A normal mail? For me? Not from the royal mail?” the mailman nods and hands you the letter.
“Put it on the basket together with the normal mails dear,” your mother said. Oh this house completely has no care about any other letter unless it’s sealed by the royals.
As weeks and months pass by quickly, you continue to wait for a letter from Hendery, and continue to wait for his arrival. But sadness had you by the neck that whenever you think about Hendery your heart will suddenly hurt and tears will automatically fall from your eyes.
Waiting is a long suffering and you understand that well before you decided to love Hendery. You knew what you signed up for… but you did not expect that it will hurt like hell while waiting for someone. It’s like waiting for a ghost to come back, you feel hopeless.
But even though you’re hurting so much, you grew more desperate to hear anything from him that you asked for his cousin Xiaojun’s help. Still, your efforts are wasted. And you’re reminded why you didn’t want to pursue your love with Hendery in the first place. “The pain that I’m feeling right now will double once he is crowned king, I’m sure of it. Is it wrong for me to ask for the man that I love? Why am I being punished?” you cry your heart out in Xiaojun’s arms, keeping you safe while he listens to what pains you and try so hard to provide comfort.
But just as you thought that you couldn't be any sadder, you are wrong. Now that everyone is expecting you to marry soon to save your family and fix the financial problem, sadder days continue to happen in your life.
“Stop your nonsense now young lady, you will marry prince Xiaojun and live with him in a new country. Stop humiliating your family and stop waiting for the crowned prince to come back. He may be all wedded and bedded by this time while you, you’re becoming even more miserable”
And that is the reason why you agreed to marry prince Xiaojun.
YEARS LATER
One night at the queen’s ball, you found yourself alone and looking at the stars again on the exact place you and Hendery first met. Breathing in, breathing out, and closing your eyes as you clear your mind and think about Hendery.
“What are you thinking about?”
You hear someone ask you from behind, you’re not sure who he is because your eyes are still closed but it can only be Xiaojun because he’s the one who knew where to find you.
But perhaps no. There’s another man who always knew where to find you even without telling him.
“Open your eyes my love, I’m home”
You turned around in an instant, looked at his face, and suddenly tears started to fall from your eyes, you can’t move and all you can do is cry. You have so many questions to him, so many sincere words left unsaid, but all you said right now is, “are you real? Or my mind is betraying me once again?”
“I am very much real,” Hendery says and gave you a tight hug, lifting you off the ground and kissing you as many as he pleases to make up for last time.
“I don’t understand, why did you leave me like that?”
“Didn’t you receive my letter?” he asks, wondering why are you so clueless when he is completely sure he told you everything. “Maybe it never reached you, I’m sorry. But now I’m back, come now let’s announce our love to my mother and ask for her blessing so we could marry soon” he was very excited but you are not.
How can you be excited? You’re already married.
Is it possible for a person to leave you and come back many years later then suddenly asked he wants to marry you as if you did not suffer greatly from waiting and being sad for months?
You remove your hand from his tight grasp and saw the ring. Now, everything is clear to him but he is very angry.
“Please don’t be mad-“ you begged.
“How could you- If only that letter reached to you, then you will know why I’m very mad right now!” He shouted at you, face turning red, eyes with tears on the side. “We were separated for years, give me a chance. Please come back to me. You told me you love me”
“And you told me you will come home! But they were only words, Hendery. And I do love you, still love you but I have a duty for my family and you have a duty for your country” He refuses to listen but you knew he needed to know the truth from you, “Please understand that you were gone for years, and I was arranged to be married to Xiaojun. I said no to Xiaojun for as long as I could, hurting him over and over again because I was waiting for you like a fool. Love someone with a strong heart, whose love is unconditional. Not like me. I can't turn my back on Xiaojun just because you're back”
"But you turned your back on me, just because I was away"
"I waited!" you shouted frustratingly back at him.
“Are you happy with him? Do you love him?”
Slowly you walked towards him to dry his tears with your hand and he’s quick to catch it kiss it before he finally lets you go.
“I am happy and no, I don’t love him but he loves me”
He nods his head slowly. Heartbroken and afraid to let go but what can he do now?
“Before I let you go, I want to let you know that... I asked you to marry me too. The man you love still asked you to marry him” he hugged you once again so you won’t see him cry because he doesn’t want you to remember him like this. “Why must our love should end tragically? I am not close to being happy but it’s good to know that you are”
He dries his tears and tried to stop crying for a moment so he can say his goodbye properly. “Go back to my cousin he must be waiting for you now. I will stay here, I will be fine. Go, it’s getting cold”
When you gave him what he asked you to do, he turned around and did not watch you leave for he doesn’t want to see you walking away from him.
Love is sacrifice and he understands that all too well now.
May 27
Dear Y/n,
This letter will reach to weeks or maybe months after I send it through a normal mail. I am being hunted down in this country that I’m staying and I have to hide and leave secretly with my guards for my own protection.
The assassins can track me through the royal mail and can use you as bait to find me. I will never forgive myself if that is to happen. I know you understand my situation right now because that’s how much you love me, let’s extend our patience together and meet when it’s safe. I am sorry my love but this is the only way.
But enough about the bad news. Last night I had the most beautiful dream because you’re in it and we are living peacefully in a country away from my responsibilities. The dream was short but it made me imagine a life with you and gave me the courage to ask your hand in marriage.
Will you marry me, when I get home?
I promise to be a good and loving husband while being a king and fulfilling my duties. I promise to never be away when you need me for I know that family is very important to you.
In the morning when you wake up and until you close your eyes to rest at night, I am going to be your husband and not your king.
I love you. Wait for me to get home safe and you will be loved by the man you love.
Hendery
312 notes · View notes
hobiwonder · 4 years
Text
Bloom | 01
Genre: Hybrid!Namkook. fluorescence by @jincherie​ AU 
Pairing: foxhybrid!Namjoon x Reader x bunnyhybrid!Jungkook ;(
Warnings: language. mention of hybrid trafficing/being sold into sex trafficing, fluff holy shit, angst, Smut (future), very cuddly and shy jungkook, stuttery shy BOYS. I really just wrote this for me.
Words: 5k+
Summary: In a world where humanity is increasingly motivated by how much cash can be made off of... well anything, you’re a human and hybrid rights lawyer. You will do anything to save the ones that never had a choice  right from the date of their conception. Even if that means, adopting two hybrids that you absolutely did not mean to. 
a/n: hello hello im back from the dead iuhbIUHBUYBGUY okay so, yes this isnt baby baby but i am a bit behind on that so i really hope posting this instead can satiate my sluts for a few more days until i have that done. I have a lot of this written so I will post this on a semi-regular schedule. rest of the schedule i posted will stay the same. it’s just baby baby that’s kicking my BUTT!!!! Lastly, I started writing this before Goo Hara passed away. Opening this document made me a little sad and also happy when i remember Hara and her love for eco-friendly fashion. I guess, this is kind of a tribute to her? anyhow, I hope you guys like it. please please please, validate me. :>)
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"Y/n they're going to be sold to this man who works for a black market. What do I do? Oh god. I-I didn't know our company was into that business."
Your best friend is nearing the point of tears and you can understand her frustration. "Listen, Hara, take a deep breath and tell me when exactly this is happening."
A deep breath is taken as you'd suggested, before you hear Hara's voice again through the phone. "Okay... Okay. I was just told by Minseok that there is an auction for the remaining two from the past failed batches. Apparently two others have been adopted and the rest have been pawned off somewhere. I'm not sure. From our division of the company, these two are the ones that have not gone for further testing to be open to the regular public. A-And so now there is a super secret auction happening tonight. It's not open to the regular public as you already know but staff members are able to attend. What do I do y/n? I can't afford them. I have my own to deal with. These poor boys will go to some horrible owner who will use them f-for god knows what."
Now Hara was crying. Openly and brokenly for the possible fate of these 'failed' hybrids that her company had produced. This was a sticky situation and even you, a Human and hybrid rights lawyer, had limited ideas as to what could be done on such a short notice. But you were not about to give up.
"Hara, don't. They will not be bought by some hybrid trafficker okay? I won't let it happen. I will... I will at least try. It's my job, remember?"
Your optimism is convincing enough. And you wholeheartedly believed that something would give. These big corporations had their toes in everywhere and you didn’t yet know if they had already had a designated buyer on the black market they pawned their hybrids off to. Where there was money to be made - no company had morals rigid enough to stop themselves from the temptation. You already lived in an age where human trafficking was no longer a cause for activism or big debates. Not when more species - man made or not - had been created to take advantage of.
“Okay yeah. You’re a badass lawyer, you must have something up your sleeve right?” Her voice is shaky but you confirm with an enthusiastic nod she can’t see.
“Of course! I’ll kick their asses. Surely this can’t be legal? No blackmarket is. Let me have a look at what can be done. I’m assuming you can bring a plus one tonight?”
“Yeah I-I was given a ticket. You’ll be coming with me right?”
“That’s why I asked, silly.” Her relieved chuckle brings a smile to your own lips.
“I’ll see you there. Don’t give up hope until I do, alright?”
“Okay... You’re right.”
_____________________________________________________________________________
“Fuck this. Fuck my life.” The curses escaped your mouth left and right as you looked over the dozens and dozens of papers splayed out on your oak desk.
Even your comfortable office chair couldn’t stop the knot building up between your shoulder blades. This was bad. Really bad. Corporate law allowed unfit materials to be sold to third parties. What these third parties did with those materials - the company of origin was no longer liable for. In short: These hybrids were going to be bought by someone sketchy with a crystal clear profile and no paper trail unless someone bid higher and bought them.
None of these bastards were rookies. They had solid paperwork where necessary and it would be near impossible to prove their illegal activities when all of them took place on the dark web. A place that opened up more threats and risks than solutions. No legislation covered hybrid rights that weren’t even registered yet. Whoever bought them would have to register them and then the hybrids would be able to receive the minimum protection they had a right to.But you can bet your father’s company that whoever bought them will never register them. Essentially these hybrids will be wiped out from the system.
Fingertips tapping against the wood, each passing minute was precious time lost. it was already 5pm. You had to leave for the dreaded auction in less than an hour and hour and yet here you sat in your chair. Hands itching to do something other than pick up the phone and tell Hara that you were at a loss. What could you do? Who would take them? You didn’t know anyone that was ready to add not one but two hybrids to their household. And ones that were not fully approved to be released. You couldn’t just lie and pawn them off to just anyone. Then you would not be any better than the company trying to get rid of them.
Sighing, you pack up the papers and documents you had initially thought would help. They were of no use anymore. All you could do was go and offer support to Hara. Or Maybe you were going because you still had hope that there would be someone who would save those hybrids. Hope was a dangerous thing for a woman like you but you had it. This was no time to wallow. So you smooth your skirt, touch up your makeup and put on your heels that had men double take.
Maybe you could scare and/or seduce these people in changing their mind?
You laugh at your absurdity, glancing in the mirror one last time before you leave with stacks of files in your hands. You could at least stall them.
_____________________________________________________________________________
“Y/n! Thank god you’re here.” I’m not so sure about that. Though you opt for a gentle smile and meet her embrace enthusiastically.
You can hear the sniffles coming from Hara who has her head buried in your shoulder. “Hey, no crying okay? No matter what happens.” The comment has her pulling back just as quickly.
“What do you mean? You have a plan for tonight r-right? Y/n..”
How could you do this? Lie to her? This was not fair on her. On anyone really. It wasn’t your fault and neither hers for whatever would happen tonight. She needed to know what to expect. As much as your heart clenched and ached to say the words you were about to; it was important to mentally prepare for the worst.
“Hara... I couldn’t find anything.” Your frown is apologetic. Trying to convey how really truly sorry you were but it doesn’t stop the tears from brewing up in her eyes.
“Oh.. I thought- thought they had a chance y/n.” You reach out for her hand, wanting to alleviate her hurt as soon as possible.
“I will at least try to see who will buy them okay? Don’t worry. We can keep an eye out on who gets them. They will be alive at least, right?” Your attempt at finding a silver lining doesn’t make her look any more reassured than you felt.
Glancing at your watch, you motion towards the building. “Come on. Let’s go before they try and kick us out.”
Hara nods, numbly leading the way towards an auditorium where several people had already taken their seats. You’re not sure how many people you were expecting, but it definitely wasn’t... this. There were at best 10 people here. All ten seemingly looked like they knew each other. This could only mean one thing. That this sale was to some degree, arranged. As in, multiple buyers were from the same company posing as separate customers to maximise their chances of acquiring the hybrids.
“Hara, have you seen any of these people before?” Your whisper has her craning her neck to have a good look at all of the men sitting in the front few rows.
“No, I don’t think so.” Her furrowed brows turn to you instead, “Do you recognise any of them?”
Shaking your head, you follow her down the stairs to sit in the row behind the last pair of buyers who were sitting.
“Whoever they are... they don’t look like they are all strangers.” Hara is gripping on to your arm when she hears you, visibly nervous once again. “I’m just speculating, okay?”
Your attempt to ease her, once again, is not enough. But you don’t try again since you don’t even believe your own words. The auctioneer however, stops you from thinking further about the impending events of the night. The man stands in a lab coat, glancing at his watch before he brings his mouth closer to the mic on the dice.
“Let’s begin gentleman... and ladies.” He seems to be surprised to see you and Hara sitting at the back. And before he begins further, he motions someone. Another man approaches the auctioneer and listens carefully as the other whispers. A few seconds later, his eyes fall back to where you sat with your best friend.
Hara’s grasp on your arm tightens once again when the man heads to your general direction. On instinct, your back straightens, posture more solid than before so as to not give anyone the wrong impression that they can mess with you unwarrantedly.
“Excuse me Miss.?”
“Yes?” Your curt reply surprises him but he recovers fast, glancing towards Hara before talking to you again.
“Are you a guest of Ms. Hara?”
“Obviously.” Your unwavering gaze visibly unnerves him. It was obvious to anyone there but you had an idea this was some sort of test.
“May I see your ticket please?” His bogus smile annoys you more than it should. Nonetheless, Hara is fishing out the ticket from her purse and showing the man. He inspects it longer than he should and finally walks back to the auctioneer to let him know you had the right to be here.
“Who would do that if they weren’t running a hoax?” You ask Hara before you can stop yourself.
“Alright. Apologies for the delay. We will now begin. As you are all aware, we are auctioning two of our very elite hybrids from a rare batch. They have not progressed to the next stage of screenings and tests due to some technical difficulties. Thus, we are here to give them a chance at a new home rather than a painful end.” He looks in the audience for effect. Euthanasia is what he meant.
“These hybrids are fully functional however lack a few abilities they were initially designed for. Due to these technical issues deeming them failed to proceed, they are available for purchase at a much lower cost than what they are sold for on the market.” The auctioneer looks so smug the urge to smack his across the face is almost irresistible.
“Right, bring them out Wonho.” Everyone is watching carefully, waiting for the ‘failed’ hybrids and you don’t know what you were expecting.
Not what you see though. Definitely not. Because the two - tall - hybrids entering the stage are not what you expect. Peach and silver tones greet your eyes as well as incredibly sculpted faces.  The peach haired hybrid seems to cling to the silver haired one. The man leading the two hybrids seems to be frustrated with their slow pace, giving the peach haired hybrid a little shove and there is only so much you can do to not yell at the top of your lungs for him to get his hands off of them.
The man sighs, letting the two hybrids to just stand in the middle when the peach haired one does not stand apart from the other hybrid. While the shorter of the two hybrids - and much, much shyer - looks around anxiously at the people in the auditorium, the silver haired one has his features set in stone. His eyes don’t look alarmed, they don’t seem scared. He just looks numb. He stares ahead at the people sitting in front of him while the peach haired boy visibly shakes, breathing fast and eyes flitting across every surface. He takes a step back, hiding part of his body behind his silver haired companion for comfort.
“There you have them. The peach haired specimen is a Oryctolagus cuniculus or - a bunny in more simplistic terms. The silver haired specimen is an arctic fox, Vulpes lagopus. Both hybrids are off a rare species and very sought after on the market. Due to technical issues, once again, unfortunately, we are only able to sell them in a pair. They are useless on their own.”
The candid way the auctioneer speaks of them has your blood boiling. But what gets you more is the laughter that sounds in the auditorium. Did these assholes think they were funny? The hybrids - entirely human or not - were present in the room with them. Did they not have any ounce of respect for them? Hara was not faring any better. Watching with a frown as chatter continued among the buyers. The bunny looked even more disturbed, looking around at every man in the front few rows - before his eyes landed on you.
The gasp that leaves you is abrupt. His pained expression holds your gaze, eyes wide and chest heaving. The bunny jumps when the auctioneer speaks again.
“We will now start the bid at $1000. $1200 anyone?” Several hands go up before the auctioneer raises the price to $1400.
Bald, greasy men exchanging glances and crude remarks as they talk amongst themselves. Your heart is thumping, your blood thinning. With each passing second, your throat seems to be closing up. There was nothing you could do to save them, was there? The further the price went up, the more panicked and distraught the bunny looked, gripping his fox companion harder, hiding behind him even more. The silver haired fox looked much like what you had stopped Hara from looking only this morning. Hopeless. His mouth was set in a thin line - just taking in the scenario in front of him. It was obvious he saw his fate before his very eyes and instead of futilely hoping that someone would save them - he stares his aggressors in the eyes.
“Brilliant! We’re at $3000 for the gentleman in the first row. Anyone for $3500?” The said man looked positively smug, sitting with his legs spread lewdly. Most likely sure that no one would contest that price.
Definitely not you.
“$4000.” Your voice yelling above everyone else is even foreign to your own ears. An outer body experience as you watch yourself look the auctioneer straight in his eyes, daring anyone in the room to go higher up on the price. But most of all, you watch the silver haired hybrid’s gaze waver for the first time - looking at you in such surprise like it was the first time he was noticing you.
“Ah... Anyone for $4500?” Only one other hand goes up. The man that had been the prospective buyer before. His face is ballooning with the amount of blood that’s rushing to it.
“Y/n? What are you doin?!” Hara’s frantic whispering flies over your head as you call out once more.
“$6000. Final offer.” You look at the other men in the seats beneath you, challenging them to dispute your offer.
The atmosphere is tense, thick with the tension brewing inside the auditorium and yet you don’t shy away from the angry glares being shot your way. A minute passes. No more offers.
“Sold to Miss?”
“Y/n.”
“-Miss Y/n. Thank you all for participating.” The loud chatter is instantaneous as the auctioneer motions the other lab rat to, assumably, gather the hybrids and their things.
“Y/N! Oh my god.” Hara has all but engulfed you in a tight hug once more. Shaking you slightly out of your own shock. This was not what you had planned but it was done.
She finally pulls back, checking you over like you were ill. “A-Are you sure about this? Oh god, okay we need to head up to the podium.”
Just like she doesn’t wait for your answer, you had not waited for your own either. You hadn’t even asked yourself the question before you had so blindly bid on the two hybrids. You’d been waiting for someone to save them. Someone to come barging in and take them away from these cruel people. Never in a millenia had you thought that someone might be you.
“Here you are Miss. You can deposit a check right now or eftpos the payment. Up to you.”
Benumbed, you take out your phone to open the phone banking application. When you’ve made sure there are sufficient funds transferred from your savings account, you wave your card in front of the auctioneer wordlessly. From the corner of your eyes, you can feel the two hybrids watching you. You wished they had at least let them wait in some sort of waiting room and not witness the jarring experience of several people bidding over them.
“Excellent! The transaction has been approved and a receipt will be emailed to you if you can fill out this form here.” Glancing at the hybrids standing a few feet away from you, clutching a duffle bag each, you try and put down your details as fast as you can.
They had already looked like they wanted to be as farther away from this place as possible and the feeling was mutual. Hara was beside you the whole time, waiting for any cue from you to provide some sort of support or whatever you needed her to do. And if your tongue worked - you would thank her as you filled out the space on the form asking you of your email address. It was sickening how easy it was for you to just... buy them! Would they not do a security or police check on you? Make sure that these hybrids are going to at least a safe home?
You were aware of the long process of hybrids that were ordered from the company. The company had a thorough process of making sure their clients were reputable and trust-worthy. That they wouldn’t do bodily harm to the hybrids but that was a facade so these companies wouldn’t have to spend money in compensation if a client had abused their hybrid in any way and had not been satisfied with what they had ordered. It was a guise. These people didn’t give two shits if the hybrids were not of expectation and couldn’t make them money.
“Am I done here?” Your tone was curt and the auctioneer could sense it.
The fact that you’d fished out more than enough cash for some ‘failed’ hybrids - he was interested in you as a potential future client. You were aware that hybrids of their breed went for $5000 - maximum. The previous greasy bald man had been close to closing a deal for $3000 until you had butted in. So obviously, they were going to kiss your ass.
“Yes Ma’am. That’s all we needed. The hybrids are good to go. Their bags have their guidebooks with them. Thank you for shopping with us.” his bright smile makes you want to hit him with your designer bag.
But even this leather was too good to be wasted on these assholes. “Y/N? Please look a little more friendly. You’ll scare the bunny away.” Hara is speed walking besides you, trying to convince you to soften your stance when you stop right before the bench they had been sitting on.
“Follow me, boys.” You’re not rude. You don’t sound mean either. But you don’t particularly sound like you wanted them. And as much as that was the truth to some degree, you didn’t not want them.
The silver haired hybrid hesitates - watching you with wide, curious eyes. Not the harsh way his eyes had scanned the room before but not exactly friendly and enthusiastic like the bunny. The bunny that was currently tugging on the silver fox’s sleeve wordlessly. His doe eyes silently ask his friend to follow you. But when his feet stay rooted to the same spot, you can’t help but sigh.
“Is there a problem?” A moment’s silence. Then finally the silver haired boy shakes his head, grasping the bunny’s hand and follows you out of the building.
Hara is gripping your hand, relieved tears in her eyes and you can’t keep looking. Because you couldn’t promise her that you would take good care of them. “Thank you Y/n. You didn’t have to do that but... but you did. You’re a good person and these boys are lucky to have you.”
Her eyes are earnest. You know she means every word and she can sense your inner turmoil at your own ability to take care of them. The boys can’t hear you both talking since they are standing near your car, obediently waiting for you. Taking a look at them huddled in the back seat, you turn back to Hara.
“Thanks Har. I will try my best. They deserve a shot at a normal and secure life. I won’t let you down.”
“And you,” she cups your face, making you look back at her. “You deserve love too. I have seen the bunny hybrid in the lab. He will heal all your wounds too. Please be happy and patient with them, okay?”
You nod, a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes but genuine nonetheless. “I’ll see you later. Love you.”
You just wave her goodbye, standing until her car pulls away. Looking back at the two boys waiting patiently in the car - you take a moment to gather yourself.
“Fuck... fuck. Fuck!” You don’t scream out loud. not really. But anyone walking by would be able to see you were stalling something. That something is going to your car and then going home.
Taking a deep breath, you decide to bite the bullet and face the reality. Getting in the driver’s seat, you look back at the two hybrids watching you from your rearview mirror. Giving them a small smile, you notice the bunny hybrid’s shoulders relax a little.
“Let’s go home.” Your voice is light and airy. Hoping to put them at ease. They were yours now.
You were their saviour.
_____________________________________________________________________________
“Home sweet home.” Letting them pass you, entering the condo, you let them take in their surroundings.
The bunny is still latched on to the taller hybrid’s flannel, hiding behind him when the fox hybrid comes to stand beside a couch. Both of them look at you - as if waiting for you to allow them to sit. The silver haired fox is holding on to the bunny’s hand, watching you with a dour look.
“Go on.” You head motions towards the comfortable three seater couch. “Have a seat. No need to be shy.”
Of course, you want to palm yourself after your remark. Of course they were shy. Well, the bunny mostly. The fox looked to be very suspicious and not exactly friendly. Though you could understand his apprehension. He was about to be sold to some very nefarious people. He seemed to be a bit older than the bunny and had a look of ambiance that only came with experiencing harsh times. Your heart felt for him.
The bunny doesn’t wait too long, sitting on the couch - well plopping is more like it - whereas the fox takes his time, battling with himself if he should or not. When you keep watching him, waiting for him to sit, he thankfully gives in and sits besides his friend.
Once you can tell that they are comfortable - as comfortable as they can be, you ask your first question. “So, what are your names?”
You smile at them gently, letting them know you are their friend. At least hoping that they can conclude that from the fact that you told them about their new home on the car ride over.
The bunny’s eyes are wide, face heating up as if you asked him a rather scandalous question and not just his name. Your heart skips a beat when the lovely blush blossoms across his face that’s hiding in the fox’s shoulder.
“Well? Can you tell me, bun? What’s your name?” Your question being directed to the bunny only makes the blush more visible. You could see his face reddening further in embarrassment and the colour being rather more visible on his neck too.
The smile doesn’t diminish from your face. Not even after seeing the way the fox is almost glaring at you but you were positive that the bunny wasn’t hiding because he was afraid of you.
“J-Jungkook. ‘m J-Jungk-kook” The answer proves to be too much for him to mumble, lips catching his plumper bottom lip as he peeks at you through one eye that isn’t hidden in the fox’s shoulder.
“Jungkook. That’s a lovely name, bun.” Your smile widens when you see the corners of his mouth stirring up a little at your compliment.
Your heart was so full. Never did you think you would feel these dizzying emotions at a pretty boy merely muttering his name. His name. If this was your reaction at finding out one of their names, you were not going to survive getting to know them before you went full mother-hen mode on anyone that tried to harm them.
“What about you, hm?” Your smile is a lingering effect of just looking at Jungkook’s adorable blushing face and you don’t let it falter even if the fox hybrid is visibly more aloof.
‘Be patient with them y/n.’ You remind yourself of Hara’s words over and over.
“Namjoon.” The smile halts briefly at the deep timbre of his tone. You had not been expecting him to sound like molten chocolate and sweeter than honey. You realise you wanted to hear him more. Hear him speak about mundane topics over and over because that’s how good he sounded to you.
“Namjoon.” the name rolls off your tongue smoothly, just like his voice. You’re still watching his face, waiting for any sort of reaction even if it’s not as endearing as Jungkook’s. Just something. But his face remains passive. A slight twitch of his lips but that’s it. The pessimistic part of your brain convinces you that it could have been a frown and not a smile that he’s fought away.
But you needed to remain positive.
“T-That’s… a very nice name too.” He doesn’t look convinced at your reply though. Namjoon continues to watch you and now you’re the one blushing from the heat of his stare.
Jungkook is watching Namjoon just as cautiously as you. Like he expected him to be like that. Austere and unwilling to be forthcoming with information about himself. Telling yourself that he’ll adjust with time, you opt for a smile that’s sent Jungkook’s way - making the bunny hide behind Namjoon again. Almost like when a child is cautious and shys away from a stranger they meet. That’s what it was.  A childlike innocence to Jungkook which awoke every instinct in you to protect him. Maybe that’s why his eyes had convinced you that you needed to take them home with you.
“Okay boys. I’ll show you to your rooms.” Furrowing your brows at the way Jungkook clutches Namjoon harder with panicked eyes, you turn around to look at them again.
“You don’t need to stay in separate rooms if you don’t want to, okay?” Namjoon regards you with a look before nodding - eyes cast down once again.
“Good. You both are very quiet but that’s okay - I can talk enough for the three of us.” The wink that you send Jungkook’s way only has him sputtering with embarrassment as the lovely rose tints his full round cheeks.
“But you do have to tell me when you are not okay with something, alright? I can’t read your pretty little heads.” As you say the last few words, your hand reaches out to shuffle the bunny’s peach hair.
What you don’t expect, is him flinching away so violently that even you are startled, taking a step back. Jungkook is hiding behind Namjoon completely now, shaking and you want to reach out. Say sorry and take it all back.
“I’m… I’m so sorry. I didn’t-”
“Hey, kook, it’s alright. It’s okay.” Namjoon’s voice reverberates through the quiet hallway, soothing the bunny’s shaking frame, whispering gentle assurances and you’re about to choke up.
What happened to him? Who did this to him. For him to be this scared. Watching Namjoon hug the shaking bunny tightly, sniffling away in his chest, only makes you feel more guilty at your brash treatment. Were you coming on too strong? God you were so out of your depth.
“I didn’t mean to scare you Jungkook. Honey..” You’re trying your best to reach out to him but the way Namjoon stands between you and him like a wall - it’s obvious he was waiting for something like this to happen. He was cautious of you and now his beliefs have been reinforced to not trust you or whatever nonsense he’s thinking.
You couldn’t blame him though. You really couldn’t.
“Please be careful, miss. He’s not a toy.” Namjoon’s voice trembles. Just the way - you now notice - his bottom lip does. He’s holding back tears and you really don’t know what to do. Except try your best to take their pain away.
“I’m.. I’m really sorry Namjoon. I didn’t mean to upset him.” You open the door to the room quickly, making sure there are blankets and pillows on the bed before coming out to tell them.
“Take him inside Namjoon. I’ll… I’ll leave you two alone, for now. Let me know if you need anything?” Namjoon merely nods, not being able to look you in the eyes but the bite of his lip tells you he’s trying to hold it together.
Jungkook’s hiccups catch your attention and you pull yourself out of your self-pity session. Only wanting to make sure that both of the hybrids are comfortable and just not feeling the way they are right now. Gesturing your head forward again, you nod at Namjoon when he looks at you one last time before heading into the room. The bunny holds onto Namjoon tightly, letting him walk into the room and when they are fully in - you close the door behind them. Giving them their privacy and also because you had a feeling they needed to be by themselves to really understand their current situation. That you were their new owner and this was their home.
A permanent home.
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shyrose57 · 3 years
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Brothers anon, im gonna start combing the two separate submissions again cause its getting too short to have them separate I think?
1: His possession messed with memories Ranbob had before, so memories of school friends or playing with Ran were distant to erased. Though after Dreams possession it was also harder to make and keep memories. But thankfully as Ranbob was recovering from Dream and got futher away making memories came eaiser to him, though he'll never get back the memories he lost. 
3: Oh he would very quickly grow to regret his decision, but it would be funny. And Benjamin would later admit that while it was annoying and stressful, it was also fun and he was very happy to have his two families meet and generally get along. 
8: Everyone is just in shocked silence before Cletus just goes "YEAHHHHHHHHHH!" Oddly happy that Ranboo committed so much arson. Oh definitely, after all the outcasts of society where put there. Of course people would make such negative rumors about Mizu and treat the people as the scum of the earth. Though this also means, people don't know what happened in Mizu, and anyone who knows, view it in a more happy and a "Their finally gone" type of way, then viewing it as the tragedy it was. 
Spoons is a card game technically. A group of people sit in a group and everyone gets 4 cards, and you keep discarding at least 1 card of yours to the person on your left, who then does the same to their person on their left, the last person in the group puts a card into a discard pile. The goal is to get 4 of the same cards, and once someone gets 4 of the same cards, that person goes and grabs a spoon in a pile in front of them (let's say there's 5 players, theres only going to be 4 spoons cause there's always a spoon less than the people playing), once they grab one anyone can grab a spoon. And the person who doesn't get a spoon gets a S added to them, once Spoons is spelled the person gets out of the game, and a spoon gets removed to continue the game. Basically for flowers its played the exact same way but with flowers in the middle expect for spoons.
11: I just imagine Dream sulking in a corner as you yell at him and him going like "well I didn't know…" as he kicks a stone. And he wasnt sure what it was, but quickly jumped on the idea that maybe it was the fact that Ran was still alive somewhere, and that that's causing Ranbob to willingly let himself become weak and defy him. Causing Dream to become angrier at Ran and punish Ranbob harder. 
----
3: During the brothers fight in the storm, and after everyone runs off to find Ranbob, Ran is left alone. And he decides to just wander off into the storm, not protecting himself from the rain so he does get burnt. The whole time he's lost deep in thought and isn't really paying attention. He continues to wander for a whole day unfollowed (because after the Gladiators and Fishermen came back to the cave after finding Ranbob they are in no rush to find Ran and decide to look for him after the storm passes, which takes a full day) and at some point Raq finds him wandering. Which Raq then uses Rans distraction to his advantage and attacks him. At first only really the gladiators where concerned when they found Ran gone. But once they found him blinded and terrified everyone felt awful and a looming sense of guilt. And everyone continued to feel that way, even after they got the antidote and Ran started to see again.
4: They would just leave Ranbob alone and check in on him every now and again. But generally let him deal with it himself. They'd feel guilty leaving him alone, but they also know that they can't really do anything for him as their not prepared or briefed on how to help him in this situation. 
10: Oh definitely, even with Ran blinded they would've been kicked out immediately for fighting, without even a second glance. Dont forget, Ran still cares for his brother. And maybe, losing his sight made him face the side of him that wanted to become family again with Ranbob, maybe it brought enough to light that he just can't ignore it anymore. Mostly only negative potions can be permanent, like posion, blinding, wither, and nausea (I know the last like 3/2 are effects but they've also found a way to make effects into potions.). You already know what a antidote for blindness would be. A antidote for wither would be, a ghast tear (actually a basic ingredient for almost every antidote), blaze powder, and glistening melon to make a overpowered healing potion. Antidote for posion would be ghast tear, swiftness (so it acts fast to get rid of the posion), and the 3rd ingredient depends on what kind of posion it  was (posion that has a side effect of constricting or filling the lungs with water? Pufferfish and Turtle shell for last ingredients. Posion that has weakness? Blaze powder, and glistening melon) And antidote for nausea would be ghast tear, and potion of slowness to allow the person to slowly feel better, so their nausea doesn't hit them all at once before disappearing, which can cause them to throw up or have side effects. 
13: Thats exactly what they did. 
14: Jackie will 100% attempt to fight God and no one can stop him. :) (to be honest im not sure yet, I know I want to do more with Raq and have the idea that maybe he could be the person that finds Dream and gets him out of Mizu, but that's pretty often used in stories and I want to try to think of something more unique. Maybe I'll have it so Raq actually manages to capture the brothers or at least one of them and uses them as blackmail?)
15: When Ranbob was a child and Ran was just a baby Ranbob would often take Ran out of his crib and take him to go watch the fish swim by. When Ran was old enough he'd follow Ranbob everywhere, even a few times he managed to sneak into Ranbobs class room and almost wasn't caught. Ran got extremely clingy one day and managed to gather his haunting all up into his arms and carried them around, even though he was obviously struggling. And Ranbob used to complain about his teachers and idiotic classmates whenever he got home, which is funny when you consider Ran was very impressiable at the time and Ran started mimicking Ranbob, leading to him cursing, much to Ranbobs dismay. 
And im curious, do you have any questions that I havent answered? Or do you have any ideas for anything? I'd love to hear whatever you have to say about anything honestly!
Course! I dont have much lore wise other than they go to Kelalen and when they hear Dream is still around they decide to stay back to help fight him. But the idea I have is that Karl is just kinda hanging with everyone I listed, talking about allies or treaties when his time traveling clock/watch starts to go off, and he panics, but sadly in his haste to stop it he makes it worse and it grabs everyone, where they end up in the future. After hours of confusion and explaining they calm down. When 2 days later they find the Gladiator and Fishermen group, at first Karl is strongly against going to then for help, but everyone basically ignores him and go to ask for help. Hours of explanation and proof giving later the GF (Gladiator and Fishermen, got tired of writing it out) group sadly tells them that they cant really help. Until Ran (who was previously gone searching the surrounding area and making sure it was safe) appears high up on a tree (cause I just can't get the image of Ran on a tree and looking comfortable and confident as hell out of my head), and says that maybe Kelalen can help, if not going to Foolish may be a good alternative. Isaac, and Grievous are extremely against going back (at this time a 2 months have past since they left Kelalen)n saying it could be dangerous but Ran just aboustely shoots them down, along with Watson and Jackie agreeing with Ran, and Karls group agreeing to it. They head off to Kelalen. And Jackie is extremely excited at the potential of going to see Foolish finally. And it'd probably be like a sub au where the brothers au is the main backbone for it but at a certain point it separates from the au and becomes its own.
1: Okay, ouch. Can you imagine if Ran brought one of those memories up, and just had Ranbob look confused, or horrified, depending on how quick he realizes what happened? How would Ran react to that realization, both before and after he forgives Ranbob?
3: If nothing else, everyone got some laughs from it-even Benjamin, once his friends were far, far away from his family and not able to teach them more chaos. 
8: Cletus, why are you so happy? Do you just enjoy knowing chaos existed back then? Are you an arsonist? What’s up with you? 
Also, wow. Not cool, other city people, that’s very mean.
Spoons sounds like it’s interesting, I might try it sometime. Did the group just have those cards on them? What other games did they have?
11: Good, put Dream back in the corner, I’m gonna be yelling more. Because, seriously dude? I know you probably exist solely out of spite, but c’mon. Admittedly, from a certain point of view, it could be considered amusing that your first thought was that Ranbob was making himself weaker out of defiance/spite but like. From a more responsible and mature viewpoint, that’s incredibly stupid, and I-just. Buddy, hate to tell you, but I’m pretty sure that’d just be a you thing. Besides you were in Ranbob’s head, didn’t he think Ran was dead? It doesn’t even make sense. Good lord, I’m half-tempted to get the broom and chase you around like you’re a particularly unruly barn cat. 
------
3: First of all, that sounds really scary for Ran. Second of all, are we getting an overprotective arc?
4: Kind of sad, but understandable, they’re dealing with the situation as best they can.
10: Even if the group was provoked by the townspeople? Potions sound really cool, wish I could make those in real life, tbh.
13: W-what do you mean ‘that’s exactly what they did’? Anon, is your friend, like, a legit gremlin? I’m spooked. 
14: Foolish takes one look at Jackie, wearing a smile that exactly matched Tubbo’s when he was about to cause chaos, and immediately nopes out of that. He knows that face, and he will not be getting tangled into a fight with a goblin child today, no sir. I’m sure Jackie tries regardless though. (Also, that sounds like that goes horribly, do we get an overprotective ender-sibling, for whoever gets captured or used as blackmail, if that’s what you do?)
15: I love all of these so much, oh my gosh. Baby Ran seeing the fishes and following his big brother around. Poor Ranbob’s face when his baby brother cursed one day, Ran trying to carry all of his haunting. I’m in tears, honestly. 
Umm...I can’t think of anything right now, to be honest. If I ever do have a question or idea though, I’ll through it on the Brothers AU tag for you to check out, I guess. 
Oh, this sounds really cool. The part about them just ignoring their local time traveler when they’ve just time traveled particularly amuses me, as does Jackie wanting to see Foolish-I feel like Foolish may be a little more than terrified to see both Tubbo and Jackie back, honestly. Why was Ran willing to help them so much? What did they do to offer proof? How did Ranbob react once they proved who they were? How does all the group get along? Are they Ranboo’s haunting, and if so, if Ranboo gets close with his descendants, does he merge his hauntings with theirs? How does the time group feel about the Brothers fighting, and Ranbob’s possession?
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horrorstreet · 4 years
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Soulmates Surprise
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Request: BRAHMS ,,, i need ,., stinky wall boy thirst or ill combust please im begging you
Request sent in by: Anon
Summary: In a world where soulmates injuries appear on the others skin, you feel the pain of Brahms burn at a young age and live your life the best you can. When you get a nanny job at the Heelshire mansion, things take an unexpected turn and Brahms gets the biggest surprise of his life.
Brahms x reader
Warnings: Angst, burns, scars, blood, bullying.
Quick Note!: I had this sitting here for the longest time and didn’t feel great about it but I tried to make it better. So so so so so sorry for the wait. I hope you enjoy!
Almost everyone is born with a soulmate. Some are born without that special connection to someone their souls are tied to. While most would say that it was a curse to not find the person who would bring you happiness, some would call it a blessing. It happened not too long ago that people began to receive soulmates and no one knew where this strange change was coming from. Scientists still scramble for a reason for what caused the strange connection that tethers two people together and it has yet to be discovered, remaining a mystery to all. In this world, when one is connected with a soulmate, any injury that their partner receives will appear on their soulmate's body and the pain carries along with it and there is no finding to prove a way to prevent this. On the bright side, when one finds their soulmate, all of those injuries and the pain that comes along with it disappear. Almost as if time erases the marks it has made on that person leaving them spotless.
You were born in perfect health, a happy baby, and your parents thought you were just precious. All was well and your parents were convinced you would live a happy and safe life up until your 8th birthday. You had been enjoying our 8th birthday, happy to be growing up and getting presents and eating cake when it took a turn for the worst. Little did you know that it would be the last day of your “normal” life. It wasn't long after you turned 8 that something felt strange to you. You were playing in your room with all of your new gifts and toys when you suddenly felt suffocated. The air you inhaled felt  thick and you began to cough. You had dropped everything you were holding to the floor, bringing your hands up to your neck and started coughing harder and harder trying to breath in the perfectly clean air around you. You parents ran into your room hearing your struggle and tried patting you on the back, not aware of what was going on. Your coughing started to mix with horrifying screams as you felt a serious burning cover your neck. It was the worst pain you had experienced so far in your life and the day your parents feared had finally come. Your hands desperately clawed at your own face, peeling off the skin which was seemingly melting away around your right eye while your parents tried to stop you from doing any further damage but it was too far gone to save any skin now. 
After the first wave of pain hit you, your parents rushed you to the hospital as fast as they could, not caring for anything else going on around them. It was common for a hospital to be full, soulmate injuries happening all the time. It was actually the most common place to meet your other half but this was not your case at all and wouldn't be for a very long time. Doctors and nurses rushed you into the emergency room, alerting the workers of what had happened to you and successfully catching the attention of everyone around you including waiting patients. When others around you had seen your melted face, many vomited right then and there while others shied away from the sight, close to adding to the mess of puke already on the floor. The nurses' faces went pale as they looked over your injury and you began screaming again, feeling a horrible pressure press up against your burn. Your soulmate must be trying to fix their own burn on their own because the pressure felt a lot like a small hand pressed up against the side of your face, making the burning sensation even worse. The nurses' eyes dripped with tears from the sight of the terribly injured child before them but quickly collected themselves like they were taught to and knew that they had to get themselves under control for your sake and to make you feel better and heal as fast as you could. You cried out for your parents as you were taken away by a doctor and her nurses around her. “Everything is going to be ok.” They promised you. “It will all be better soon.” But the scar the incident left behind would only bring you more pain than you ever would have expected. 
Upon waking up, you were unable to see out of your right eye and began to panic. “Mommy! Daddy! … Mommy!!” You screamed out, thrashing around in your hospital bed. Nurses quickly rushed into the room and held you down to prevent you from messing with your face for a second time, worrying that they were too late. Another ran in and stopped when she saw the heartbreaking scene and slowly walked over to you. “My dear, you are going to have to calm down. You are hurting yourself.” She instructed, taking your small hand in hers. “Mommy?” You hiccuped, your face wet with tears. “No, darling. They will be back soon.” She told you, giving you a sad smile. You took a small shaky breath, tears still falling down your face and nodded to her, curling your small hand into a fist in her hold, slowly pulling away. “Why can’t I see?” You whimpered, reaching a hand up to touch whatever was keeping you from seeing. “No,no! Don’t touch it! You have a wrap over your face to help you get better ok? You won’t be able to see for awhile.” She explained. “Oh…” Was all you could think to say and laid back down with your face pointed at the ceiling. A few of the nurses left your hospital room while others stayed to check your vitals which did startle you. Who were these people and where were your parents? All you wanted was your parents. 
It wasn’t until the next day did your wish come true. Your parents rushed into your room to see you and your mother crumbled into your father's side in tears. You recognize your father standing in the door and reached out for him. “Hello, princess …” He smiled at you, taking your hand. “Daddy!” You giggled, wincing at the sharp pain that shot through the injured half of your face. “Yes, hello! How are you feeling?” He asked you, gently brushing your hair out of your face. Your mother cleaned the tears off of her face and smiled at you, taking your other hand. “I can’t see.” You told them, looking over at your mother. “What?” You mom asked, her face dropping. “My eye is covered. They said it was going to make me feel better!” You happily explained to her with the part of your smile that wasn't covered. “Oh… dear, you frightened me …” She sighed, a hand resting on her chest. “I'm sorry, mommy.” You apologized, squeezing her hand. “Oh! Dear, no! You are perfectly fine!” She chuckled, running her thumb over your hand. Your smile returned to your face after hearing your mother's words and you told them about all of the nice nurses that had been helping you while they were gone. They were pleased to hear about how well things went and made sure to thank all nurses and doctors that helped their daughter recover. You went home with the bandage still on your face which meant you would need your parents help getting around and taking care of the injury but you weren't complaining. 
Your parents loving looks towards you never changed unlike those around you. As you healed, you were able to remove your bandage from off of your eye and you were absolutely happy to be able to see everything from your right eye again. Your skin felt like it was tugging at the side of your face and everything felt so rough to you. The first time you looked into the mirror after the incident, you almost didn’t recognize the reflection staring back at you. Your hair was untouched and so was your eye but the skin on the right half of your face was red and scarred and you feared yourself for the longest time. Your parents explained to you that nothing had changed about you as a person, your face just healed the best it could and tried its best to return to its original look. They made you feel proud of your appearance and body but others did the opposite. 
“Ew! What happened to your face!” They would point and laugh and grimace and when you tried to tell them what your parents had told you, they completely broke you apart. Unfortunately for them, you weren’t one to take insults like that. You shot back 10 times harder and let your young voice be heard. It happened all the time but you had already accepted yourself and what had happened so any negative comments people would throw your way would do absolutely nothing to you and only made you feel more and more confident in yourself. “They don’t know what it’s like and that’s ok. I am beautiful.” You encourage yourself with your head held high. 
_______
“Good luck and we love you.” Your mother sniffled. “Please, don’t cry, mother! I will be back soon. I will visit as much as I can.” You told her, taking her hands. “I know, I know. But you’re just so far away.” She wiped her tears away, reminding you of that day in the hospital. “You stay out of trouble, now.” Your father smiled, bringing you into a hug. “I can’t promise anything.” You chuckled. Your father shook his head and let you go and you took a deep breath. “Bye mom … dad.” You waved, trying your hardest not to cry. “Goodbye, dear. We love you.” Your mom waved back, standing at her husband's side. “I love you guys more. Goodbye.” Your mom shook her head and continued to wave as the car you got in drove off down the road, the figure of your parents getting smaller and smaller. 
When you were too far to see them anymore, you moved out of the window and sat down. “Quite the goodbye.” The driver said, looking at you through the mirror. “The hardest.” You replied, looking down at your bag. It was silent for a while till the driver spoke up but not without hesitation. “I know this may be rude …. But I was wondering what is on your face?” He asked, glancing at you through the mirror every other second, most likely examining your mask. You were silent, thinking of how to answer his question this time around when he spoke up. “I'm sorry… I shouldn’t have asked …” He apologized, scratching his stubble covered chin. “No, no. It’s ok. Uhm, when I was younger, I got a pretty nasty burn. It bothered people a lot so I figured I would wear a mask. Makes it easier for me and them.” You told him, reaching under your mask to itch your scars which he noticed. “Is it uncomfortable?” He asked again, not bothering to look back at you again. “Yeah,” You sighed. “It gets on my nerves a lot.” You said to him, pulling your mask back into place. “You don’t have to wear it here. I'm not one to judge.” He smiled. “Are you sure?” You asked, reaching up to take the mask off. He nodded his head and looked back at the road to focus on driving and you thanked him. You smiled and removed the mask from your face, undoing the straps and putting it in your bag. 
_______
“Here we are. You sure you don’t want me to drive you all the way up there?” He asked, turning around to look at you, not flinching away at your scar covered face at all. “I'm alright. Thank you so much. You really do have a kind soul, sir.” You said while pulling your bags out of the car. “Well, thank you too. And hey, as much as people might get in your hair because of the way you look, you keep moving forward. You're a strong kid. I can tell.” You nodded at him and waved goodbye as he drove off back to the main road. You walked through the large open gates and up the gravel path to the large house that awaited you. 
“Uhm …” 
Knock 
Knock
You hit the door with your knuckles and waited for someone to open the door. You jumped out of your skin when you heard the door open, its old hinges screeching against each other. “Hello?” You called out, walking through the door. “My name is (y/n). I'm the nanny?” You raised a brow and set your things down on the couch by the door and looked around. You wandered around the house, peeking into every room to get a feel for the place when you stumbled across a neat, typed out sheet of rules that sat right next to a porcelain doll.  “Brahms?” You picked the doll up and held it out in front of you, really questioning if this is what you came all this way for. “Oh my god. What did I just get myself into.” You mumbled to yourself. “Ms (L/n) I presume?” A voice greeted from behind you. You gasped and carefully laid the doll down on its side to turn around. An older lady stood at the bedroom door with a smile on her face, waiting for your reply. “Mrs. Heelshire. I am so, so sorry. The door just opened … on its own? So I walked in but no one was there.” You explained to her in a flustered manner. “No worries, it must have been Brahms that opened the door. I'm surprised he did that.” She gestured to the doll. You gave out a few laughs before looking at her face and realizing she was serious. You cleared your throat and looked down at your feet and back up to her. “I am glad you have already had the chance to meet and hold Brahms. He really does seem to like you.” Mrs. Heelshire shrugged. “Oh, yes. He is a very lovely boy.” You nodded which made her smile. “I'm glad to hear that. Me and my husband are leaving tonight so I figured I would explain everything to you before we left.” Mrs. Heelshire said while walking over to the doll and picking it up off of its side to sit it back up. 
_______
“Goodbye.” You closed the door behind the two and let out a long breath. “Oh my god. Oh my god. What the hell.” You panicked, looking around the large house. You were about to enter the kitchen when you heard a door slam shut, making you yelp. “Hello! Who’s there!” You shouted out, grabbing a large knife to protect yourself with. Another door slammed shut behind you making you scream and run up to your room with the knife held tightly in your right hand. “Brahms! If this is you!” You shakily called out to the boy. “Play with me.” A young boy's voice called out to you. The adrenaline racing throughout your body made your heart pump and brought tears to your eyes. “Ok. I'm coming.” You took a deep breath and put the knife down, making the decision to play it safe in case there were to be an actual child running around the long halls of the large mansion. You walked into Brahms’s bedroom and slowly walked over to the doll sitting on the bed. You looked around to see if there was an actual child hiding somewhere nearby but when you found nothing, you quickly looked back over to the doll. “You wanna play?” You asked the doll, picking it up and resting it on your hip. “Well, that isn’t on the list, so.” You scolded him, picking the paper up off the covers and reading over it. 
You started with his lessons, sitting him by you while you struggled to play the piano. After about an hour of that, you picked Brahms up and carried him to a large chair that you pulled in front of your own seat. You picked up a poem book and began to read to him loud and clear for as long as needed and played his music. You walked around the house with Brahms to clean the place up, dusting, wiping things down, sweeping and mopping everything you could while swaying to the sound of the song playing in the background. When the music stopped, you left Brahms to put everything away. When you came back, Brahms was no longer sitting where he once was and you felt your heart pounding in your chest. “Brahms?” You yelled, quickly walking all throughout the house trying to find where he went off too. “I'm sorry. I forgot about the rule to never leave you alone.” You apologized to him once you found him looking out the glass doors that lead to a balcony on the top floor. You picked him up and looked outside at the green trees surrounding the place. It was warm enough that you wouldn’t want to layer up during the daytime so you figured it would be nice to take him to the balcony. 
Lifting the latch to the door, you pulled them open to let in the fresh outside air. “Nice, isn’t it.” You smiled walking forward to lean on the railing with Brahms still in your arms but you weren't expecting the railing underneath you to be so weak and crumble apart when you put your weight on it and you fell forward. The broken stone stabbed into your stomach as you fell down to the ground, trying to curl your body to keep Brahms safe but you were too late in catching yourself and began to fall off of the balcony. You let out a very loud scream as you fell off the platform, throwing Brahms behind you so he didn’t fall down with you. You had thought that you had met your end until you felt a large hand grip the back of your shirt and prevent you from falling all the way to the ground from the top floor. The person behind you grabbed your leg and pulled you back onto the balcony, hugging you close. You were about to scream out for the stranger to let you go but felt a warm feeling flow throughout your body. Your burns marks began to disappear and the scratches and stab wound closed up and the dark blood that stained your clothing was the only proof left that it had actually happened. 
Brahms felt the change as well and let you go so he could back away to reach his hand under his mask to feel his face. It felt smooth under his touch for once and he was startled. What have you done? Where were his scars? He snapped his head up to look at you and you quickly stood up to run off. You didn’t catch him speed off until he was already through the doors, the doll in his hand. “Wait! Hold on!” You called after him, quickly getting up and pulling your mask off of your face to let it fall to the ground. You had abandoned it with the broken stones that made up the railing of the balcony and left the doors open as well. You sprinted after him, catching his sleeve in the process and pulled as hard as you could. Brahms stumbled back and wrapped his hand around your neck, lifting you up before slamming you into the ground. Your head collided with the hardwood floor of the house leaving you dizzy and causing Brahms to feel the same. He loosened his grip on your throat and waited for the throbbing in the back of his head to stop before looking back at you. When he felt his airway closing up as he held his large hand down on your throat, it finally hit him. “Soulmate.” A deeper voice whispered. His hand lifted off of your neck allowing you to take a deep breath of air and pulled you back into his lap. 
The doll was discarded by a decorative chair by the both of you and his new free hand came over to wrap itself around your body. He held you as close as he could, his mask getting in the way of him pressing his face into your hair. He removed his mask without a second thought and nuzzled his face into your neck. He had never felt this type of calm before. It was new to him and it made his heart beat fast and his skin tingle. You tried moving away from the man holding you but his grip on you only got tighter. He found his other half and there was no way he was letting you go now. “You’re my soulmate.” You whispered, trying to comprehend everything that was happening. You closed your eyes and leaned back into Brahms chest and felt a feeling that you had never felt before. 
Love
You felt at home in his arms. You didn’t care if it was in the snow, in the heat, or in the dirt. Wherever he was, was where your home would be. He felt the need to be closer to you than possible and just held you there, enjoying the time he was sharing with you. “(Y/n)...” The low voice spoke just above a whisper. Hearing him speak made you want to cry a river of tears of joy. His voice was like a sweet melody in your ears, so soft and soothing and you could listen to it all day long. You could listen to it for the rest of your life.
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fairycosmos · 3 years
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ed anon get HELP 😭😭😭 you really don’t understand that people gain and lose weight and just. exist?????. a person after giving birth will gain some weight same w someone who is struggling with mental illness can gain or lose weight lol it’s definitely not something that you can “control” like rhat and many many people who are overweight just. happen to have a body that makes them gain weight more easily?? also is someone confusing being overweight vs being obese. and there’s nothing wrong with having fat that your body needs to survive ☠️ people need to eat and sometimes healthy food isn’t available do you know how expensive that is??? and people who are stuck at home so of course they gained some weight bc their body is keeping them alive :))) << i may have realized some weeks ago that i may or may not have an ed and may i say fuck these shitty beauty standards i literally fainted and threw up last year after i ate almost nothing in days, talk about control! lmao i feel bad for you. i hope you get better soon.
MENTION IT ALL 🗣 they were honestly so fucking tragic lol ive never seen such blatant projection in my entire life lmfaooo half of me thinks it was just bait because it was so overtly stupid. if it wasn't they definitely need help and also to learn to shut the fuck up cause if thats how they conduct themselves irl no one is going to want to give them the time of day and for good reason LOL. it's so sad like they just completely disregarded all this nuance and all these different factors on their quest to feel better than fat ppl. they said allll that on something they're unbelievably ignorant about and for what. doesn't surprise me at all that they have an ED like it was very clear they were just mad at fat ppl for thriving and being happy and confident in a way they've never been in their life! and the fact that they had the audacity to talk about control it's like babe youre not in control if you have to starve yourself to feel somewhat alright. i hope they get better soon too but i also hope they stay away from fat ppl forever lol they don't deserve access to their friendship or time at least with their current mindset, what a cunt. anyway love im proud of you for being able to admit whats going on to yourself, thats a really big step. i know ed's are the scariest and most frustrating thing in the world but the unequivocal fact of the matter is that you deserve to recover, you deserve to feel ok in your own body and you deserve to be nourished. no ifs, ands or buts. i really hope that you're able to seek out the professional help you need, whether that's via a hotline or a support group or a therapist and that this enables you to grow into a healthier version of yourself with time. it really isn't impossible. much love x
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dolliedarlin · 3 years
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me 🤝 missing dollie hours 🥺
hiii it’s been a while but here’s another life update
honestly i haven’t been doing that great. i’ve been really down lately and have lost motivation for just about everything. idk what caused me to get in such a rut but i am very much struggling to get out.
on a much brighter note, i managed to get myself to start cleaning my depression room (that’s what i call it when i feel too down to do anything and everything becomes really messy) i’ve managed to do some tasks and my room looks a lot better and my goal is to tackle my closet tomorrow and try to straighten that out as well. i’ve also picked up more hours at work so that’s a nice distraction from feeling down as well.
i found out the person i have feelings for has feelings for someone else and has been dating them for a bit now, so i am currently trying to get back to where i see them as just a friend, as i do not want to get in the middle of their relationship but still want to be a part of their life. i’m happy they’re happy, and i don’t want to get in the middle of that and would love to just support them in their new relationship.
i also start college in exactly one month and i’m absolutely freaking out because i have to face the fact that i’m no longer a kid and my responsibilities are about to increase. it’s also kind of depressing because a lot of my high school friends are leaving for college and i’m going to miss them a lot. if you have any tips for college they will be very much appreciated as my anxiety about it will not go away.
i’m sorry to just kind of spill everything on you but i just really love talking to you and the positivity and advice you give me help me get through times when i’m really struggling. i really do consider you a close friend and i appreciate everything you do for me.
please don’t feel rushed to get back to me but i would love to hear from you soon. i’ve missed you so much! i hope everything is going well and you yourself are doing great :) i can’t wait to hear from you <3
awww~ i'm sorry my love, i know i've been away for a while but it's not without a reason, i promise! i'm here to stay now though so don't be sad!
it really has been a while, i'm scared to think that i'm not up to date with you so i'm sorry i'm not able to comment on anything current for you if that's the case
oh darling, im really sorry to hear that. i think you and me both have been in a slump despite it being summer but i promise that everything will get better, it just takes a little time. the best advice i can give is to not push yourself and take things slow. there's no need to force yourself to 'recover', take a day or two to do nothing or anything you want and when you feel up to it, take some time to yourself to reflect on what you think may be wrong, there's no one else who knows you better than yourself so if you really look deep, i think you'll find something. and with that, you can realise what to do to get out of your slump or seek out someone who might know how to help you. if you want, i'm here to listen any time, just chat with my privately.
that's wonderful! making/getting a nice, clean environment is the first step to a better, healthier mindset, it works wonders! you sound like such a busy bee, how do you not just collapse?! i admire you, i'll have to get on your level really quick if i want to keep up with the pace of life and being able to get out the updates i want to get out on time.
I'm sorry it didn't work out but you're so mature and that comes quite rarely nowadays, so i hope you keep that part of you always and realise how precious and wonderful it is to have. i'm sure you'll find an even better match some day, i just know it, judging from how lovely you are already, i'm sure it's not too far away.
i promise that college/university isn't as bad as it may seem. it's a great time where you discover more about yourself, learn to live independently and make new friends! and as long as you keep in contact with your high school friends, i'm sure you'll be fine, my friends and i, despite going to different universities, kept in contact and are still really good friends now even though we've met new people and made new friends too. some advice...don't pressure yourself into doing things you're uncomfortable with or aren't confident in. like i said, this is a time of self-discovery, there's no need to rush into new things just because you've never done them before or because other people are doing it. do what you want to do and at your own pace. it's also best that you surround yourself with good people who respect you and your values above anything else, they might not like the same things you like but if they respect you and treat you well, that's better than anything else. i don't really know what American college is like so i don't know how to advise you on what to bring when you move out or if you move out, im sorry, my love - better look to someone else for that
awww~ now i feel so guilty for not having replied for so long, i'm so so sorry, i hope you're doing well, dollface, please reply soon and tell me how you're doing again! i missed you millions but i slipped into a pretty big slump even after coming home and pushed myself to do work experience over the summer which didn't help much but now that it's over, i've gotten a little better so now i'm able to hop back onto things, thankfully!
goodness, this is going to be a long post!
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tyonfs · 2 years
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🤧: alice it has been forever I hope you are doing well! I miss talking to you 💗🥺
also so sorry but happy very belated birthday I wish I sent you a dm on time but school and work has been cramming my time too much than I like as well as my extracurriculars. I was thinking of you though during that month !! I was like ‘oo Alice birthday is this month I hope she has a good one’ so I’m hoping it was a good birthday 🥳 🎂
there also is this boy 😳😳 I have a crush on that I’ve known since freshman year of college but started developing feelings for recently but we are just friends so it is not really going anywhere so I’m considering on giving up — as lame as that is ahah — but yeah that is tea I have if you wanted to know 👀 it has taken a lot of my emotional time as well cause I tend to get very attached and invested in crushes lmao ooof
also my housemate situation is much better and I’m living with pretty good friends and it is very nice! just an update since we talked about that months ago ❤️
how’s your school life and your housing situation? hope it is also lovely as well
OMG HELLO !! IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME :’)) how have you been?? i hope you’ve been taking care of yourself love ♡
omg don’t worry ab my bday :’)) i was pretty preoccupied with school anyways so all i was thinking about were my exams during that time 🤧 but i did have a good birthday and got to see my family and have some time to myself so i could relax !! 💗
omg tell me more about this guy 😳😳 also moving on from someone isn’t lame !! personally catching feelings is scary and even more so for someone you know pretty well D; and i bet it’s probably a lot to handle when you have college classes and other stuff to attend to :’) but keep me updated on how things go with him!
IM GLAD YOUR HOUSEMATE SITUATION IS BETTER THIS TIME 🥰🥰 sometimes it takes us a few wears for the right fit, so i’m happy you finally are living with people you like :’))
also my housing situation is excellent !! we all get along very well and have a rlly great vibe so it’s very fun :)) school life is great bc i’m on winter break now HAHHA but this quarter wasn’t too bad per se, i think i just burned out a little towards the end and had to catch up on a lot of work to get back on track 🥲 i clutched up for grades tho thankfully which i thought i would slip on after i got sick during finals week 😭 now i’m just glad i’m finally at home and recovering from the comfort of my bed and my mom’s homecooked meals :’) how about you?? do you have any plans for winter break? 💘
also what do you think ab the new album? ;D
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megalony · 4 years
Text
Braces
This is a fluffy dad! Steve Rogers imagine that I’ve been meaning to polish up for a while. I hope you all like it, feedback is always lovely.
Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @peterquillzsblog @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh
Masterlist
Summary: Steve and (Y/n)’s son has to wear braces on his legs that Steve knows knocks his confidence a lot. But he decides to surprise Steve after a mission by running properly without them.
Enjoy.
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Bruce smiled at the scene in front of him, something that didn't happen very often and that was rather rare in all cases. He was currently in the lab, trying to do his work but his eyes kept diverting to look over to where Tony was. Although it was him he certainly didn't act like the Tony Stark everyone knew and got annoyed with after a while. He was standing in front of the metal table in the lab which his nephew James was sitting on with a bright smile that Bruce never got tired of seeing.
Whenever Tony was around his nephew he seemed like a totally different person and Bruce found it rather endearing to see.
Things between Tony and Steve had always been uneasy, it was like they were always getting off on the wrong foot or they always locked horns over the most silly, trivial of things. But when (Y/n) and Steve had James, it cemented the broken foundations between both men. They would hardly ever argue if James was around and he seemed to calm them both down rather a lot, more than (Y/n) could ever calm down her big brother and her husband.
The little boy had a lot of medical problems, some of which related to the problems Steve had before he got the serum and it broke his heart to see his son grow up each day struggling in the same way he had done. They all knew it wasn't Steve's fault, the serum did run through James like it did him but not enough of it. James had asthma like Steve did but not as bad as his dad which was a relief to them for Steve had a lot of asthma attacks and couldn't even run properly with how bad his breathing got.
James was also a very skinny child, taking after Steve again and it caused him to gain illnesses quicker but they was the only illnesses James had inherited from his dad. What Steve was happier to acknowledge was that James was his double, he had the same ash blond hair, the baby blue eyes and the cheekbones and even the curved nose. He had a lot of personality traits like his mother and smarts from her and Tony combined too. He was a mix of all of them and they all loved it.
Tony had taken it upon himself to be his nephews doctor and consultant, he wanted to help and look after him in any way that he could which is why James and (Y/n) were currently in the lab with them.
James wore braces on his legs to help him walk properly, when he was a toddler he somehow managed to walk with his feet sticking out to the sides and he found it very difficult to walk without support. The braces were to help correct his walk and give his legs that extra support and Tony designed them so they weren't so bad looking and hard to manoeuvre. He made them so they were thin but strong and kept moderating them like he did to his suits to thin them down but make them more efficient at the same time.
"Alright then, I'll just adjust these and your all set little man. Why don't you surprise your dad without them on?" Tony encouraged, seeing James' eyes light up at the idea like he had stars captured in his pupils.
"Can I?" He asked, excitement bubbling in his tone causing his mother to smile. He wasn't used to walking very much without the braces on, he relied on them to make sure he continued to walk properly since he was still growing. The thought of running- or at least trying to run- to Steve and show him he was a big boy able to walk better made his smile widen significantly when his uncle nodded that he would be alright to do that.
"Sure, just not for too long."
"Your dad should be back now, let's go surprise him." (Y/n) pitched in as Tony carefully placed James down to his feet before patting his back.
With a smile, Tony leaned against the table as he and Bruce watched James slowly walk over to (Y/n), managing rather well on his own without the support he was so used to. It wasn't as if they were crutches that he relied on to keep him upright, James could walk without them but it was safer and would aid him better if he wore them every day until a stage where his walking was adapted to normal.
(Y/n) handed his bag to him and he slipped the straps onto his shoulders, he never went far without his backpack designed to look like Steve's shield. He took his mother's hand and they exited the lab in search of Steve, knowing they would be back in a little while for the braces to be fitted again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Steve and Natasha walked down the corridor, both rubbing at their damp hair making their contrasting hair colours look a few shades darker than they really were. The pair had just got back from a mission which took three days and still felt like they were covered in dust and grime.
Even spending half an hour in the shower didn't do much to rid the sticky feeling that Steve got from being in his mud covered suit for hours on end.
Both of them stopped outside the elevator, pressing the button to head up to the lounge in the Avengers tower so they could sit down and try to recover before they eventually had to do something or got another mission come through. Some of the avengers lived at Stark tower, but others like Steve, Thor and Clint had their own homes, though they sometimes stayed over when needed.
"Go on honey." (Y/n) whispered to James, kissing his head before pulling back to watch him make a bee-line for his double. James could see his dad and aunt down the corridor waiting for the elevator and he hoped he would catch them before they disappeared to another level of the tower. James knew not to run too fast, (Y/n) had warned him about that because it would strain his legs and he could pull a muscle or fall which wouldn't be very good for him at all.
"Daddy!"
As soon as the all too-familiar voice reached his ears, Steve felt his heart speed up and he turned to his left to search for the occupier of the voice. Steve hadn't been expecting his son to be at the tower today but he certainly hadn't expected his son to be heading towards him with a bright smile and no braces adorning his slim legs.
A bright smile lit up Steve's features at the rather rare sight of James looking happy to be trying his best to speed walk. It was very hard to get James to want to go out with his braces because he felt awkward with them and as if they were holding him back rather then enhancing him. Steve wanted to take a few steps forward and reach him halfway but he stopped when he realised James was determined to make it all the way down the corridor to him instead.
The moment James got within reach, Steve bent down and scooped his boy up in his arms. He spun round whilst holding James tight against his chest in a comforting hug, knowing he had caught James just in time because his foot had skidded on the polished tiles and he would have fallen if he carried on any further.
"Wow there, soldier! What happened to the braces?" Steve asked in shock, standing up to his full height once again with James secured to his shoulder. He felt his heart jumping in his chest when James wrapped his arms around Steve's neck, hugging him as close as possible since he'd missed him whilst he'd been away.
Steve bounced his boy on his hip but when he noticed James was breathing rather deeply he moved his hand and dug around in the backpack on James' shoulders. He pulled out his boy's inhaler, something Steve had had the luxury of forgetting about until James was a toddler and found out he needed one. The little boy took a few deep breaths to calm down before he managed to give Steve a response to his question.
"Uncle Tony's fixing them, I wanted to surprise you." There was a small hint of sadness in his tone because he knew soon enough he was going to have to go back to wear the braces that corrected his walking but slowed him down at the same time.
"Well you certainly did. Do you think you can make it back up to the lab without them?" Steve whispered the last part in James' ear, seeing his son smile brightly and nod in response to the mini-challenge. Steve always tried to push James to keep going and try harder but at the same time, Steve would stop him if he knew his boy wouldn't be able to do it.
When Steve was younger he never had people trying to encourage him to do things, he had to encourage himself and he didn't want that for his son. As much as his mother had tried to make him feel normal and comfortable and okay, she wanted Steve to hold back and play things safe rather than try and test his limits. He knew that James needed someone to will him on and that was exactly what Steve was going to do, he would try and push James within his limits so he would excel.
"Well done little guy." Natasha chipped in with a smile, running a hand through his hair to ruffle the strands which made him smile before she patted Steve's shoulder and headed into the elevator heading.
Steve pressed a kiss to the side of James' head before he set him back down to his feet, walking close beside his boy just in case he slipped or tripped. Steve could see that James was already starting to edge his feet out to the sides automatically like he did when he was running but he was walking overall much better than usual.
When they got to where (Y/n) was patiently waiting for her boys, she kissed James' forehead, wrapping him up in a congratulating hug before letting him head over to the stairs so she could see Steve.
It felt like a lifetime since (Y/n) had felt Steve's arms binding around her waist, seen his charming yet cheeky smile or felt his lips pressing against hers when in reality he had only been gone for three days. (Y/n) always prayed that any missions didn't last very long because she knew that if three days felt like a lifetime, he would barely get through a week or more without Steve.
"Daddy, come on!"
James' voice broke apart the couple's short-lived moment but the lopsided smile on Steve's face made (Y/n)'s heart skip a beat and told her they would carry this on later. The couple started to ascend up the stairs after their son who was bouncing up the steps like he was a spring or a little excited puppy.
(Y/n) leaned her head on Steve's shoulder as they both watched James, but when they got close to the lab Steve noticed James was slowing down. He was clearly getting tired and he was starting to kick his feet out to the sides, his legs becoming uncoordinated because he didn't have the energy to correct himself.
"Alright super-soldier, come here." Steve wrapped his free arm that wasn't placed around (Y/n)'s waist, around James' front and gently picked him up so he could settle him on his hip to rest his legs.
"Uncle Tony I surprised daddy! And walked up the stairs too!"
James' voice became slightly higher in pitch from his excitement when the three of them entered the lab and his words caused Tony's lips to curve into a smug smile. He knew it would raise his nephew's spirit to try and walk without his braces and impressing Steve would only further elate James' mood.
"See, you won't be needing these for much longer I'm sure. So I've changed the design a little, and the colour scheme is just as his lordship asked. Come on little man."
Steve pulled away from (Y/n) so he could walk over and settle James down on the table. He watched intently as Tony crouched down in front of his nephew and slotted the braces into James' shoes before strapping them just below his knees to keep the metal bars in place around his skinny legs. It didn't escape Steve's attention when the smile James previously had on his lips dampened when the braces were put on his legs. But when he noticed the small Captain America shields at the bottom of the braces, a breathless giggle left his lips.
"Thank you uncle Tony."
"Your welcome." Tony ruffled his hair before he made his way over to Bruce so they could carry on working on their new piece of technology.
Steve shook his head with a playful smile when James looked over at him and held his arms out, clearly wanting to be picked up. Whenever Steve had been away even for just a little while James became clingy wanting to be wherever Steve was and he loved it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Are you ready to head home?" Steve questioned the little boy in his arms who he knew was rather tired. James nodded tiredly in response, slipping his bag back on his shoulders when Steve handed it to him. Natasha had stolen (Y/n) for a while wanting to catch up and chat and she said she would meet the boys back at their home when she was finished chatting with Natasha.
Steve gently placed James down to his feet and got up himself, putting his leather jacket on before taking James' hand and attempting to leave the room but he stopped when he realised his son wasn't walking with him. He cocked his head to the side, his baby blue eyes pooling with love and confusion as he waited patiently for James to tell him what was wrong.
But Steve found his face falling when James simply held his arms out to him; he wanted to be carried.
"What's wrong soldier?" Steve went down on his knees so he could be level with his boy who was clearly upset with tears glistening in his eyes which made Steve feel panicked.
"I don't want these." James responded quietly, tapping at the braces on his legs making Steve sigh sadly. He took a deep breath before he looked at James with a gentle expression, trying to think how to make him feel better about it but he didn't know what to say to make this better.
"I know you don't, but they're not forever buddy. If you don't have them you'll hurt your legs and your back too." He tried to keep his tone gentle and understanding and James nodded his head but his expression didn't change. He didn't want to walk around wearing braces that slowed him down and made it feel weird when he walked, They annoyed him and made him feel abnormal, not to mention the way people looked at him when he went out.
"I don't like them daddy."
"Buddy, if you wear them then you can train with me more when your walking better. You wanted to join me didn't you?" A small smile tugged at James' lips as he looked down at his feet and nodded in response. He went to the gym with Steve from time to time but didn't do much, he mainly watched him most of the time although Steve encouraged him to do small weights and he helped him with other activities there. It made James happy and boosted his confidence a little so Steve kept bringing him along.
"But I... um..."
"What is it?" Steve asked, a smile on his features encouraging him to talk and say what was on his mind.
"I want to be like you."
Closing his eyes Steve sighed, that was not what he expected to hear and it broke his heart. Truthfully he didn't know if James could ever be like him with the medical issues he had. James might get better as he grew older, his asthma might subside, he was most likely going to walk fine when he was in his teens and no longer had the braces. And if he put on a bit more weight he might be less vulnerable to illnesses, but Steve didn't know if he was ever going to be like him in a physical stance.
But then again, Steve always thought he himself would always be the short skinny kid who spent half his life in a hospital or laid in bed with a cold and yet here he was now.
"What colour are your eyes?" Steve's rather off-topic question caught James by surprise and he looked very confused before he answered as if he thought it was a trick question.
"Blue."
"Just like mine, and what colour is your hair?"
"Blond."
"Correct, and you've got my nose too; you look exactly like me. You have a shield on your back and your a good little soldier, your kind, funny and I know your smart. You're already like me, you're my little doppelganger and I love that about you, but you don't have to act like me or walk and talk like me. You are amazing and perfect as yourself. My little soldier."
Steve didn't want James to grow up and think he had to act just like Steve or even want to act like him, he wanted James to be his own person. He thought it was sweet and rather endearing that his son- his first child, looked the spitting image of himself, Steve loved that. It was like he was looking in a mirror that showed him his younger self. But he wanted James to grow up and form his own person and his own mind, he came to the gym with Steve because he wanted to try and train but Steve didn't want him to think he had to be just like him.
With a soft smile, Steve reached out and wrapped his arms around James, holding him to his chest in a tight, comforting hug before he got to his feet, ready to get them both home.
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dasibom · 3 years
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haven't read it but heard mostly very positive things about a little life, would be interested in why u think it's bad? (if u want ofc)
ofc i love talking abt how much i hate this book. i answered a similar ask on my old blog so i'm just gonna copy paste (with a little editing):
content and trigger warnings for rape, csa, suicide, self harm and abuse. both for the book and this post.
i have so, so many problems with this book. lets start with... the gay stuff. here’s an bit from a goodreads review (link) by Michael Flick, which says it better than i could. the whole review is worth a read, too.
“Some believe that this is “The Great Gay Novel.” That couldn’t be more wrong. There are only two recognizable gay men in this work, JB and Caleb. A creative queen and a violent, probably psychopathic, sadist. All the other “possibilities” are pedophiles (categorically not gay—that’s a sickness, an evil, that has nothing to do with being gay) or so hopelessly confused (and impotent) that you can’t know what they are (JB and Willem). The take on gay men here is antediluvian—a dangerous and discredited brand of heteronormative delusion in which all gay men, no matter the glittering surface of their lives, are fated only to die a lonely, miserable death. Caleb dies an excruciating death (so we’re told) from pancreatic cancer. JB, the witty, flamboyant, unstable, creative queen is merely a plot point. His happiness, told but not shown, at the bitter end doesn’t mean anything more than that. He’s a device to wring one more regret from you, one more sorrow. You can be assured that he, too, will die an ignoble death just beyond this novel’s last page. And you won’t be troubled or offended or titillated by the gay sex (or really any sex) here because there isn’t any: it’s the sex that dare not speak its name. All this is because the author knows absolutely nothing about gay men other than the most superficial stereotypes and doesn’t have the imagination to venture deeper than that. She can’t even imagine that a man (Willem) doesn’t need a woman to quench his sexual needs—he has a solution readily at hand.
other than this, i remember this book having lesbophopic language but i don’t own a copy and i'm not gonna search the internet for that.
basically the whole book is just pure torture porn. so many bad and traumatising things happen to the main character it feels unrealistic and i think the only reason it happens is because the characters life has to be miserable. that's the whole point of the book to me. there is no reason to so graphically include a ton of this stuff in a book other than shock value. some of this graphic stuff includes very extreme descriptions of self harm (mostly cutting but also other stuff), suicide (including possible methods), physical and sexual abuse (part of it when the main character is a child), violence and medical trauma. i’m afraid that there is a real danger to this book teaching people how to hurt themselves (or even stuff like where to hide the tools they do it with) and i can’t imagine what an actively suicidal person might get out of this book. it really, really concerns me. i’m afraid this book teaches people to not get help, to not go to therapy and get help if they’ve been traumatised and/or are struggling with living. i've been traumatised in childhood and i can imagine what someone younger than i am, someone more impressionable, could get out of this book. like seriously some very fucked up ideas, i felt like the whole thing about being traumatised, and the constant self harming and suicide attempts were presented in almost a romanticised way. obviously my opinion here isn't like objective, or something, cause i'm a person trying to recover and deal w childhood trauma, which still affects me every day, in several ways, and realistically, it will never stop affecting me, but the point is that although it was terrible and it fucking sucks, it doesn't mean i will have a life with no quality and will forever be unhappy and unable to cope. and this book so clearly disagrees with it. the fact that the main character is traumatised and that horrible things happened to him as a child feels like a death sentence when it doesn't have to be.
^ lmao a point i also wanted to bring up in this section is that not all of the shit that happens to the main character needed to happen because it's fiction and it's a made up story, like after some point when i was reading it and seriously messed up shit just kept happening and it kept on going i thought like... why? it servers absolutely no purpose after some point. reading a rape scene after rape scene stopped having an affect on me eventually and... that's not very good, is it? like, i'm trying to say, this is fiction, it doesn't need to go that far? at some point, a very early point at that, it was enough to get the message across that hey, what happens to this character is bad and fucked up, it didn't need to go on.
the whole book is also full of people enabling the main character to hurt himself over and over again and do nothing. every character is there to some way hurt the main character and people praise this book for being such a great tale about friendship. it is so pretentious and again, just pure torture porn. the book so clearly seem to think therapy and reaching out to people for help it bullshit!
i’m not saying you can’t write or discuss the themes that are present in this book but i just don’t think this is the way to do it. probably a therapist specialising in trauma should consult with the writer and someone should make sure the description of self harm and suicide will not harm anyone. i think there are guidelines made for that by people working in the field and i just feel like something like that would be of benefit here. like, i don't know, i don't have a solution, i'm just saying this is not it.
also, here is a link to the author literally saying she does not believe in trigger warnings. and i think those would have been extremely beneficial to have at the start of this book and i certainly would not have read it if it was for them. that would have saved me from so much triggering content that i did not want to read and i wish badly that i did not read. it seems clear to me the author does not have any idea how traumatic things can work, or at least that is what i think based on what she says. here is a link to an interview in which she says she does not believe in talk therapy. there, a point about a persons autonomy to end their own life is brought up which is a topic but if that’s what she wants to talk about then it should be done in clear terms and not with the only message “therapy doesn’t work if you’ve suffered enough trauma.” at least that’s how the whole thing seemed to me. like of course a persons own choice to end their life is a discussion i do think is worth having, but... that did not come across in the book.
lastly, here are some links i have saved about this book which i think point out excellent things if anyone wants to read more:
https://www.reddit.com/r/books/comments/a0e1yi/convince_me_a_little_life_is_a_good_book_please/
http://post45.org/2016/06/im-so-sorry-a-little-life-and-the-socialism-of-the-rich/
https://cannonballread.com/2016/07/narfna-a-little-life/
& you're welcome to ask me to clarify something or just discuss, this is a little bit of a mess cause i copy pasted that old answer and edited it a bit to hopefully word things better but like. idk if much of it makes sense
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