#canttouchthis

[lostinyv]

When Halloween is my favorite holiday, but, it is New Year's Eve! 🤔 3️⃣0️⃣4️⃣⏰️days!

✿❀❁✫.•°*”˜*˜”*°•.❁.•°*”˜*˜”*°•.✫❁❀✿

A joyous New Year's Eve to you and yours!

✿❀❁✫.•°*”˜*˜”*°•.❁.•°*”˜*˜”*°•.✫❁❀✿

Just a gal taking it one day at a time and her #LifeChoices 💯🎯‼️🙋🏻‍♀️ I'm obviously a work in progress 🤣 #newyearseve 🎉 #Halloween 🎃

#HalloweenIsALifeStyleNotAHoliday

#ItsAlwaysHalloweenAtMyHouse #ItsAlwaysHalloweenInMyHeartAndSoul #NowWhereIsMyDietSoda 🥤❓️❗️

#nowwhereismydietsoda #halloweenisalifestylenotaholiday #canttouchthis

[andrewkhurst]

STOP! IT'S HAMMER TIME AND I APPEAR TO HAVE SOMETHING IN MY EYE

Martha and mum sometimes go away to a relative’s caravan for a long weekend during half term holidays. Working always means that it is a girls road trip, and I am left in the Macaulay Caulkin role of coping with life Home Alone. This usually involves ordering pizza and writing this book in the attic room whilst listening to my record collection at high volume.

This time, I arrived home after my Thursday shift (the girls were away Thursday morning to Sunday afternoon) to a ‘Sorry we missed you’ delivery leaflet through the letterbox. I had ordered a new carpet runner for the stairs, as the last one somehow got covered with loads of black paint when I had recently painted the stairs black. They’d left it with our tiny elderly neighbour. When I knocked on her door to collect the carpet, she tried to become a mini Arnold Pensionegger, and pick it up this object that seemingly took up the same volume of planet Earth as she did. I grabbed it off the floor instead and took it home. My pottering around had taken an unexpected busier turn.

The existing stair runner was fixed in place with a decent quantity of carpet tacks, and the new one would require similar fixing. Try as I might, I just could not locate a hammer. We have three hammers and a rubber mallet in the house but I couldn’t find any of them. I did eventually manage to locate one hammer. The only problem was that it was a 12” tall poseable Mattel MC Hammer doll. He was NOT going to spring to life to pull carpet tacks out of the stairs and store them in his little shiny Hammer pants,so I REALLY needed to find a non-MC type hammer.

In desperation I messaged mum, listing the many many different locations that I had visited on my thus far fruitless quest. She replied with a very cryptic “well if you promise to put it back and act surprised, if you look in your birthday present parcel, there MAY be one there. Martha wanted to get you a personalized hammer as part of your gift.” A padded envelope had been delivered a few days previously, and had sat on the dining table ever since. I hadn't peeked, because (a) I am 50, not 05, and (b) I assumed it was some kind of incredible custom made Etsy Bob Dylan birthday topper with bees coming out of his nose.

As soon as I read the text message, tears welled up in my old failing eyes. I cried at just how thoughtful my five-year old daughter had been with this incredible gift idea. Then thought “hang on a minute…Martha IS a borderline early developing psychopath…did she throw all of the other hammers over next doors fence so that I would have to use her gift?”

#mchammer #hammertime #canttouchthis

[maximusaureliuspugladiator]

“Psst.. don’t disturb our kitten, YoYoMa, who keeps us up all night.” 😼-Max #max #pug #dog #kitten #yoyoma #cat #doglife #catlife #catsofinstagram #kittensofinstagram #dogsofinstagram #pugsofinstagram #donotdisturb #sleep #canttouchthis #doglover #catlover #love #loveyoutothemoonandback 😴 https://www.instagram.com/p/Cn0lDNXLi-L/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#max #pug #dog #kitten #yoyoma #cat #doglife #catlife #catsofinstagram #kittensofinstagram #dogsofinstagram #pugsofinstagram #donotdisturb #sleep #canttouchthis #doglover #catlover #love #loveyoutothemoonandback

[clittleshop]

6:30 AM - how is your day going? #coneofshame #coneofcuteness #bichpoo #lickerproblem #canttouchthis #flower #mooselittle #cute #cutedog #littledog #iflookscouldkill #whitedog #whitefluffy #whitefluffydog #mybestfriend #spiritanimal (at CLittleShop) https://www.instagram.com/p/ClixLq0O2Dj/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#coneofshame #coneofcuteness #bichpoo #lickerproblem #canttouchthis #flower #mooselittle #cute #cutedog #littledog #iflookscouldkill #whitedog #whitefluffy #whitefluffydog #mybestfriend #spiritanimal

[jorgemerlos]

Aveces tenemos que ser fuertes, porque ser fuerte es nuestra única opción 😎💪🏼 🥊 Keep Swinging-SPB #fuerte #serfuerte #southpawbill #southpawboys #canttouchthis #redondobeach #westcoast (at Redondo Beach, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/ChDBi6CpH61/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#fuerte #serfuerte #southpawbill #southpawboys #canttouchthis #redondobeach #westcoast

[dpomalescreative]

What i say.. yo you can't touch this... I take that beat Break it down and bust it.. Devil be coming at me and I'm like phukk this.. imma break it down baby.. you can't touch this... Imma make you feel this pulse Trust this.. It's all about MooviN and GrooViN Got this tune in my head And it goes like this.. #breakdance #breakitoff #poppingandlocking #canttouchthis #toosmooth #goingoff #cantstopwontstop https://www.instagram.com/p/CgIh17pgO5q/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#breakdance #breakitoff #poppingandlocking #canttouchthis #toosmooth #goingoff #cantstopwontstop

[cockprincesss]

From sketchbook #1 #sketchbookart #sketchbookartist #oklahomaart #oklahomagal #headup #hustlehard #hatershate #hustleharder #notbothered #talkshitgethit #imgoodimgone #canttouchthis #mchammerdance #whatyouthought #hashtagsilly #whatsbeef #beefiswheniseeyou #guaranteedtobeinicu #onemoretime #whatsbeef2022 #dontplaywithme #youdontwantdrama #youdontwantnone #aintsayingitagain #leavemealone #letmelive #yougotjokes #igotthis #wildincuzimyoung https://www.instagram.com/p/Ccmrx7aud2h/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#1 #sketchbookart #sketchbookartist #oklahomaart #oklahomagal #headup #hustlehard #hatershate #hustleharder #notbothered #talkshitgethit #imgoodimgone #canttouchthis #mchammerdance #whatyouthought #hashtagsilly #whatsbeef #beefiswheniseeyou #guaranteedtobeinicu #onemoretime #whatsbeef2022 #dontplaywithme #youdontwantdrama #youdontwantnone #aintsayingitagain #leavemealone #letmelive #yougotjokes #igotthis #wildincuzimyoung

[acciotheomione]

The Dangling Conversation by Canttouchthis

Theo Nott is, unequivocally, the most aggravating Healer that Hermione has ever worked with.

He’s also, without a doubt, the best.

Link to AO3

AO3 tags below the break

Archive Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationship(s): Hermione Granger/Theodore Nott

Additional Tag(s): Healer Hermione Granger, Healer Theodore Nott, Minor Character Death, Discussion of Death, Inspired by House M.D.

#rating: m #status: complete #author: Canttouchthis #word count: 10k+ #theomione endgame: yes #era: post-hogwarts #tropes: healer theo #tropes: healer hermione #card catalogue #theomione

[dramioneasks]

Do you know any fics where Draco and Hermione are in a forced marriage. Voldy wins AU or during war time, and D comes home after killing people and H knows and hates it?

Shadows of Ourselves By: InkFairy - T, 32 chapters - Draco Malfoy has played both sides of the war for years, but when Voldemort gives him an ultimatum—bring him Hermione Granger or die—she surprisingly agrees to be handed over to the Dark Lord. Together, they take pureblood society by storm as Master and Madam Malfoy, all while trying to help the Order find and destroy the last Horcruxes and defeat Voldemort forever.

The Breaker of Bonds - Canttouchthis - E, 29 chapters, Words: 173,955 - In Voldemort’s kingdom, Hermione and Draco are nothing but battered trinkets for the king’s entertainment. But there are more players than the mad king knows, and the game is far from over. A Voldemort wins AU inspired by Game of Thrones.

The Vow By: lun27 - M, 14 chapters - Hermione didn’t think her life could get any worse, but the Malfoys are experts at proving her wrong at every turn. So she plays along with their game of tug of war while Voldemort rises to power and threatens their very life. Dramione Marriage Law AU.

Last Words by RebelVale - M, 24 chapters - After two and a half years on the run Hermione’s luck runs out and she finds herself on her knees with Draco Malfoy’s wand at her throat and no one left to save her. “Last words Granger?” AU where Harry doesn’t survive the battle of Hogwarts. Substantially revised version of work previously published elsewhere.

Entanglement By: blankfish - M, WIP - “Your loyalties begin and end with me now, Granger, or have you forgotten?” he spat bitterly. At the request of the Order, Hermione Granger marries Draco Malfoy, a man she’d only ever known as her enemy. This decision leads her on a winding path of tumultuous consequences that even she could not have predicted. Dramione War AU.

Draco Takes a Mark - diamonddaydream - T, 53 chapters, Words: 184,204 - "The fact that Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy were mad for each other was the worst kept secret at Hogwarts.“ Retelling of The Half-blood Prince as a Dramione story. Crookshanks brings Draco to Hermione after she’s brought back cursed from the Department of Mysteries. Knowing the relationship they’ve carried on in secret since the Yule Ball is about to be tested, she inscribes an ancient love charm onto his left arm with surprising consequences which may affect the course of the coming war. Continues the story "Dancing with Draco ” or reads fine on its own. Complete, HEA

-Lisa

#anonymous #forced marriage #war #au

[thatsassyhufflepuff]

More Dramione quotes bc…why not.

~~~

“No, she never accepted gifts without putting up a fight much to Draco’s chagrin.

But to his everlasting surprise, she did accept to take his name.”

Take My Hand (Wreck My Plans)

another_lonely_writer

~~~

“I tend to avoid sappy public declarations of love, but for you I will endeavor to do so at every opportunity—I love you, and I’ll spend all the rest of my days proving it to you.”

The Troublesome Thing About Time

LadyKenz347

~~~

“He pressed his eyes shut for a long moment, before finally turning towards her. "I want to give you the world, Granger. I want to give you everything but all I have is my heart. And that's already yours."

The Creature You Know

In_Dreams

~~~

“Everything has changed, Draco. This, just now.. everything changed.”

He sighed, and pressed his forehead to hers once more.

“In another lifetime, I would have married you.” He whispered.”

You Will Fall

edengrace

~~~

“If he had fallen from grace, then she was still an angel; high in the sky and untarnished despite the chaos of earth beneath her.

 He may have been the one with a celestial name, but she was surely the one that shone above everything else.”

Where Angels Fear to Tread

megsivy

~~~

“I used to think I had no choices, that I was destined to follow in my father’s footsteps. I was barely breathing before you, treading to stay above water. You showed me it was worth it to fight the inevitable.

I know it’s selfish, but the time I had with you, was the happiest I’d ever been.”

No Way Home

Canttouchthis

~~~

“He didn’t deserve such well wishes, but Hermione was everything good in the world and how dare he or anyone else ever try to dim her brightness.”

Dear Hermione

Schmem_14

~~~

“She could already tell being the object of Draco Malfoy’s affection would be a magic entirely of its own.”

Her Admirer

mcplestreet

~~~

screaming, crying, throwing up, rolling around on the floor hysterically I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

#draco fanfiction #draco fluff #draco malfoy #draco malfoy fanfic #draco malfoy fanfiction #draco malfoy fic #draco malfoy fluff #draco malfoy imagine #slytherin #dramione fanfiction #dramione fanfic #dramione

[rebelwithacauze]

A shout out to the Irish supporters during #Qatar2022 for their continued solidarity with the Palestinian people.

#Thankyou 🙏⭐️❤️

🇮🇪 🇵🇸

#vivapalestina

#palestine #Ireland #qatar #soccer #worldcup #Qatarihospitality #canttouchthis

#ireland #palestina #freepalestine #qatar22 #soccer #world cup #fifa world cup 2022 qatar #solidarity #voiceforgaza #palestinian #boycottisrael #bds #israeli #israel #children #underattack #idfterrorist #wakeupworld #palestine #genocide #ethniccleansing

[dhr-ao3]

The Captain and the Rebel

The Captain and the Rebel https://ift.tt/VAgKeUp by Canttouchthis “I see you in my dreams,” she said the words like they were a song, blinking as though trying to clear the cobwebs from her mind. “In the moments before I wake. I see castles and spaceships and pastures. And every time, I see you. I wondered how long it would be until we met this time.” In the year 3486, Draco Malfoy is a loyal, tired Captain of the Intergalactic Sovereignty. But when he’s tasked with interrogating the illustrious rebel Hermione Granger, he’ll slowly find his world upended as she weaves a love story that spans a thousand years and countless solar systems. Words: 5795, Chapters: 1/9, Language: English Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Mature Warnings: Major Character Death Categories: F/M Characters: Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy Additional Tags: Canon Divergence - Post-Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Alternate Universe - Space, Spaceships, Past Lives, Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Tragedy, Prisoner Hermione Granger, Secret Relationship, Non-Linear Narrative, Older Hermione Granger, Older Draco Malfoy, Blind Character, War, Space People via AO3 works tagged 'Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy' https://ift.tt/Rne3U0H April 23, 2023 at 09:12PM

#IFTTT #Dramione #Draco x Hermione

[valentinesgreatestgift]

The LORD protects those of childlike faith; I was facing death, I was brought low,  I was helpless, & He saved me.

😭🥵💔🤕🥰💗🗣️💞

#HisFavorite #StillStanding #StillWinning #Resilient #TooLegitToQuit #CantTouchThis🔥

#Loved🥰 #GodsGracenGlory✨

nv-anointedtoslaydemons.com

[the1andonlyryanrose]

🔞

FULL DISCLOSURE I’M not PERFECT, I’M REAL, WILD AF, & IDGAF cuz RAW is LAW! I take immense pride in being, “The only real Porn Star left.” As well as being a Public figure, Public Enemy #1, Masseur, Go-go, Content Creator, Model, Influencer, Ambassador, & Personal service provider. May the bridges I burn light the way because bad ideas are the beginnings of epic adventures & truly grand stories. If nothing else I’m never boring & one toe-curling hell of a good time. For a good chuckle check out them hashtags

©️

DO ALL THIS BULLSHIT→ Befriend→ follow→ subscribe→ like→ & book me using:

    1). linktr.ee/the.ryan.rose

™️

#DropYourCocksAndGrabYourSocksTheKingIsBack #YouMakeMeHurtIllMakeYouSquirt #FuckTinyTimVPussyAssBitch #MakeYouHoldMyPocketPunk #SaySomethingIllDickSlapTheCovidOuttaYourMouth #DontLikeMeFuckOffProblemSolved #HollaAtUrBoiChiTown #ryro #MoneyMakesMeCum #UGotUrkelesInUrCircle #DidIDoThat #MetalIllnessAwareness #TheLastAndOnlyPornStar #SuicidePrevention #escort #ClimateChange #BadBoy #unapologetic #AmericasSweetheart #GetLit #BeautifullyBroken #GoGo #SupportiveAsshole #InSearchOfInnerPeace #TheLastJohnWayne #ALPHABTTM #DontAsk #DoctorsAreTheWorstDrugDealers

#EatThatBigPharmp #woke #IDGAF #IGiveMoreThenIhave #ILuvMarthaStewart #OprahWinfreyFan #chicago #florida #houston #GOAT #NothingToProve #NoRestForTheWicked #OnlyTheGoodDieYoung

#FlyPelicanFly #IllEatYourFace #Pup #AlphaPupZeus #HammerTime #CantTouchThis #BadIdeasAreTheStartOfEpicAdventures #CHECKMATE

®️

ᴅɪsᴄʟᴀɪᴍᴇʀ ɪ ᴅᴏɴᴛ ᴏᴡɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ᴛᴏ ᴀɴʏ sᴏɴɢs

[mood2you]

[duranduratulsa]

Watch "M.C. Hammer - U Can't Touch This" on YouTube

Album of the day: Please Hammer 🔨 Don't Hurt 'Em by MC Hammer (1990) featuring U Can't Touch This #MCHammer #pleasehammerdonthurtem #ucanttouchthis #canttouchthis #90s

#mc hammer #please hammer don't hurt em #u can't touch this #can't touch this #90s #Youtube #Spotify